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lady-merian · 1 year

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In which I roast nitpick The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey

Under the cut, as promised, for length because I had a lot of salt left in me even after nearly two weeks.

I’m trying to be fair, so rather than lumping everything together as an example of a bad adaptation, I’ve got three categories. One for things I personally dislike but don’t automatically make for a bad adaptation, one for continuity errors caused by them changing things without fully considering the reverberations, and one for the things I see as actual issues for faithful adaptations (consider them like a level up from the things that are more a matter of taste, which I’m admittedly nitpicky about because I care about the story and characters.) Alternatively, some of them are changes which reverberate throughout the stories, necessitating further changes, but without the continuity errors that come from the writers not paying attention. There are fewer of the latter two categories in this first film. I’m not going to bother counting the issues I have with parts two and three.

I mostly like the opening with Old Bilbo and Frodo, it seems to fit with the first part of FotR… up until Frodo tells Bilbo he’s going to meet Gandalf (tiny continuity error, because I don’t think Bilbo would’ve forgotten where Frodo was in the beginning of FotR) but that, along with the ending not *quite* meshing with the beginning of FotR where Bilbo is writing the prologue to his book. It’s a little thing that hardly registers unless you’re watching them back to back. (This second thing is more something for BotFA )

Me being nitpicky: 1

Continuity fail: kinda? .5

Adaptation fail: 0

Telling the story of how Smaug came to the Lonely Mountain in Bilbo’s words rather than Thorin’s: it’s a choice that makes sense to me, it’s a similar feeling to the LotR opening prologue and gives us the information about the Ring sooner. I think both trilogies wanted to show the stakes right away rather than having an infodump later. Different ways for different mediums. Same with showing us little Bilbo and Gandalf, and how little Bilbo used be excited about Gandalf rather than nervous.

The change from the Arkenstone being mainly an ordinary gem (though valuable) to an object to unite the dwarvish kingdoms is… a choice… I don’t personally like it and setting it up to be that important doesn’t seem to have had enough bearing on anything to justify it. If anything, I think it detracts from Thorin being just plain obsessed with it for its own sake.

Then we have Thranduil. Kudos to them for keeping the discrepancy between sides re: the white gems. Considering everything else sets up Thranduil to be a first class jerk..

Me being nitpicky: up to 2. I don’t mind the fact that the way we get the info changes as much as I mind the Arkenstone change, but nothing in the book specifically contradicts the Arkenstone being this kind of artifact (except for it being buried with Thorin, see below) so ymmv.

Continuity fail: I’m not sure whether the fact that the Arkenstone still gets buried with Thorin is an inconsistency with the change to it’s nature, but unless I missed something it’s not really brought up as something to unite the dwarven kingdoms in BotFA so.. 1.5

Adaptation fail: giving this 1 point because this is where they fail Thranduil’s character which reverberates in the next movies. In an adaptation, character arcs matter too, especially when they influence the plot and I’d argue Thranduil’s character has quite a lot of bearing on the plot later on. Could’ve been 2 points, but as I said at least they did include the discrepancies between the story told by the elves vs. told by the dwarves, which helps a tiny bit (and it does seem like this whole trilogy is a story told by the dwarves rather than Bilbo, who canonically respected and liked the Elvenking).

The good morning scene: visually, it’s good. I’m glad they included the silver scarf for Gandalf. Personally, though I like the way he looks as Bilbo I’m not such a fan of Martin Freeman’s performance. Especially here. I fully acknowledge that it’s likely no one can play it like I imagine it though. It’s just.. his attitude is different. He doesn’t have the comfortable, almost self-satisfied way about him that I imagine. Now Gandalf plays it nearly *exactly* as I want. (Dialogue changes aside)

Me being nitpicky: up to 3. Why on earth couldn’t they have added “what a lot of things you use good morning for? Now you mean that you want to get rid of me, and that it won’t be good till I’ve gone”?

Continuity fail: no change

Adaptation fail: no character assassinations, and nothing big enough to necessitate further changes, which are my main criteria. The fact that Bilbo didn’t invite Gandalf to tea the next day means there’s no need for an explanation as to why Bilbo forgot so that’s a change that makes sense for a medium that doesn’t have a narrator.

Enter the dwarves:

Should I count each issue I have with them separately, or collectively?

In the books the dwarves were IMO more polite, (from their perspective they *had* been invited.) And also Bilbo offered them food and drink, (albeit reluctantly,) since it was what a good host would do, but they didn’t go into his pantries themselves.

Some of them look decent, but some look utterly ridiculous and it didn’t help with matching names to faces as they DIDN’T EVEN INTRODUCE MANY OF THEM I mean that’s a pretty significant part of the first chapter to just skip over! And what a missed opportunity for humor, having all the other dwarves giving their name and offering their service, and then here’s Thorin who says nothing about Service but I guess one could say they tried to do that with the haughty look Richard Armitage’s Thorin gave (I mean it works for him I guess.)

It’s now been a couple weeks since I last watched it, but I only remember them introducing Balin, Dwalin, Fili, and Kili. And aside from Bombur (obvious,) Gloin (at least they made him look kinda like Gimli) and Thorin, those are the only ones I can reliably match up names to faces rather than remembering something dumb about their appearance. I get that they had 13 dwarves to make distinct, but… I think of that one dwarf as Star hair (also a thief? Which makes it weird that they’d hire a burglar? Why my brain calls him star hair I don’t know he only has three points not five, but it’s how I see him), another as Weird Hat guy (nice character, took the role they gave Balin in the books as being more sympathetic to Bilbo), another as The Scribe (wait that reminds me: it’s Ori, he’s implied to be the skeleton they find in FotR in Moria, but I remember *that* from a Tumblr post not the movie) but he’s portrayed as naive and almost …childish? No good at combat? (Doesn’t he carry a toylike slingshot?) And I’m drawing a blank on the others. I can rattle off the names of the dwarves at a moments notice, so that’s not the issue, but remembering who is who in here would’ve been easier if they’d been actually introduced.

I like the tune for That’s what Bilbo Baggins hates, (unsure of why they changed the rhyme scheme, but like the tune.) Once again the music is a winner. (This goes double for Far Over the Misty Mountains Cold, even though my complaint with that is that it’s too short.)

Me being nitpicky: *sigh* I’ll add three four, one for them changing the rhyme scheme on the song, one for what I think are more than a few not very dwarvish looking dwarves, and one for the missed opportunity for having all the other dwarves offering their service to Bilbo and making Thorin’s omission obvious by comparison. It’s a movie, it can do that with a look instead, but I don’t have to approve. The fourth one for that star haired dwarf being a thief. :P total: up to 7

Continuity fail: I know they introduced the idea that they need a hobbit to be their burglar because Smaug won’t be familiar with a hobbit’s smell here, (rather than not telling about it till the last movie) so I guess it’s not *that* much of a problem to have the Star haired one also be a thief. I want to add a point here but I’ll add another to me being nitpicky instead. Total: still at 1.5

Adaptation fail: as I said, the characters matter. One. ONE dwarf is polite, and it’s Ori, the one they portray as weak. The youngest. (Also not canon, Fili and Kili are the youngest) (Actually throwing the dishes, and banging the silverware on the table misses the point of the song too) so one for them not introducing the dwarves, and one for the dwarves being actually rude rather than unexpected guests. (Stop portraying dwarves as crude and sloppy with food and drink 2k23) total: up to 3

In which Gandalf gives Thorin the map and key:

This one has a bigger continuity fail right off the bat because WHY NOW? Since in this version, Thrain was apparently still sane and in his right mind before giving them to Gandalf to give to Thorin, it loses the book’s reasoning of Gandalf having to track Thorin down in the first place (when Thrain couldn’t even tell Gandalf his own name, let alone the name of his son)! The battle where Thror went missing was so long ago, you’re telling me Gandalf only just now found Thorin?

Me being nitpicky: I refuse to count this one as just a me problem, this is someone wasn’t paying attention to why the timing was the way it was in the first place.

Continuity fail: up to 2.5

Adaptation fail: this is more setting up an adaptation fail in the third one, but it still counts. Total: 4

Ahh, the missed opportunities for humor to have Bilbo half plan to come (pricked out of pride) wake up to find them gone (and this time they’ve left the dishes for him to do) and decide to have a second breakfast and then have to rush when Gandalf shows him the note. It could’ve been hilarious. But nooo, they had to make Gandalf prod Bilbo into coming by acting like it’s a moral failing to care about your family home and the things in it :P and then have the audacity to have a bet whether he’d come or not :P :P

Me being nitpicky: adding one, now at 8

Continuity fail: no change

Adaptation fail: while I agree Bilbo showed growth as a character by coming on the journey, I don’t agree that him deciding not to come would’ve been what Gandalf implied. So adding one. Up to 5

At some point I’m gonna have to make a note about how this movie takes the serious things and makes them a joke, and the humorous things and makes them overly serious.

I’m taking an awfully long time on these, bear with me I’ll try to condense more

-The story of how Thorin earned the name Oakenshield was melodramatically played, though accurate enough as far as I remember. Me being nitpicky: up to 9. I can see why hashtag majestic became such a meme for a time

-trolls: I think they tried to make Thorin look more heroic by surrendering to save Bilbo? (Tactically speaking, that made no sense) Missed opportunity to have Gandalf tricking them into arguing, added initiative from Bilbo in its place. Me being nitpicky: up to 10.

Adaptation fail: surprisingly I don’t consider it a fail to change the reason Bilbo got caught. A lot of that part would make less sense without a narrator, and having a talking wallet would be difficult to explain in any event. (Admitting my bias here, I don’t think that part in the story fits with the rest of it in the canon)

Radagast: the addition does sort of make sense, considering it is canon that during one of Gandalf’s disappearances from the quest was to deal with the Necromancer and this provides an explanation as to why. I think they made him just a little too nutty, and look a little too weird (the bird poo bugs me, give him some dignity) but Sylvester McCoy is fun and makes up for some of it. Me being nit picky: 11

The fact that Azog is still alive? Is again A Choice. One I’ll consider more me being nitpicky. (12) however them needing a WARG attack to let Gandalf bring them to Rivendell.. no. Book Thorin had some respect for Elrond, and gratitude too for the respite and provisions. RUDE dwarves, and again with the food tossing? (Adaptation fail: 6 and that’s not even mentioning Thorin’s disdain for elves being so great he almost turned down Orcrist. Make that 7, the fact that he can’t recognize good craftsmanship)

I’m not sure how I feel about the tune to the Inn song, or the change from it being Bilbo’s invention to something the dwarves know. I know I dislike whichever dwarf decided to call Sting a letter opener. It was, given the size, probably a long knife for an elf, but for a dwarf it’d do as a short sword so it’s a dumb thing put in almost purely to put Bilbo down. If you want an explanation for why Bilbo didn’t show Elrond the sword, just make it so he doesn’t even suspect it’s that special.

Me being nitpicky: 14 if I count the Inn song

The white council: I’m all right to a degree with it, but it’s weird that Saruman is so against the quest. Yes, by this time according to the timeline in LotR Saruman was already desiring the Ring for himself, but Saruman didn’t know that the Ring would be found by Bilbo. Granted, the LotR movies kind of made less of Saruman wanting the ring for himself, and made him just want to ally with Sauron, so I guess that’s why *this* Saruman wants to prevent anything that might hurt Sauron?

Me being nitpicky: 15

The goblin king: bad, bad, awful, bad. it may be nitpicky, but he feels too.. modern in his speech. I’m not going to rewatch the scene to write an example of this.

Me being nitpicky: 16

Riddles in the dark:

I love it okay I have nothing bad to say about it even though it didn’t have every riddle.

(Okay one tiny thing, that doesn’t even bother me that much..

See, in FotR, in the prologue where it shows Bilbo finding the Ring, right beside the Ring it shows a part of a skeleton, implying (to me) that this is the orc Gollum had killed when he last used the Ring. I thought that was a neat nod to the implication in the book that this was probably where he’d lost it. This movie changes it, so it doesn’t line up with that scene. Technically I could consider this a continuity fail, but I’ll just give it the other .5 of the first one I mentioned, since it’s the same kind of not-meshing that that one was, bringing the number up to 3. As I said, it doesn’t bother me enough to stop me enjoying the riddle scene, so I’m not adding to the nitpicky score. I just find it very interesting and want to know if anyone else noticed those bones.)

Time for the note I said I’d make about serious things being played for laughs and humorous things being made too serious:

*deep breath* once again, I get the fact that they weren’t adapting it as the children’s book it actually is, but were rather trying to darken the tone to mesh a little better with LotR, but.. see I think they went about it wrong. At points, it seems like this trilogy is darker than LotR in that it has fewer moments of levity and makes something of a revenge subplot with Azog into an overarching thing across the three movies.

I can understand taking out the Elves’ songs in Rivendell, just like I can understand taking out the troll’s talking wallet, but then they went and ignored canon humor (many of which are mentioned above, but also including the goblins trolling the dwarves about them hiding in the trees with their songs which is why this comment is where it is) and made Every. Single. Goblin problem they had into this whole thing with Azog.

And yet instead of getting across the culture of the dwarves in exile, their nobility, their manners, their sdlfdsaklfjd basically everything, (want better phraseology: see Tolkien’s criticism of Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs) they are often played for crude, comic relief except when needed to increase the #majesty of the House of Durin and Thorin in particular :P

Adding in one big adaptation fail for all this, putting the number at 8.

I know I had more examples, but this is already so long and rambly and I’ve taken a lot longer with it than I meant to

Wish they’d given the Eagles voices and shown they had lives of their own and didn’t exist to be merely bearers of burdens. (In a way that might help explain to people why they didn’t just use the eagles to fly the ring to Mount Doom… but I digress. If it’s a failing then it’s a failing that’s in both trilogies.) but again with the canon humor, Bilbo complaining about his poor arms, Dori complaining about his poor legs…(me being nitpicky: 17)

Well, if you’ve read this far, you should get some sort of prize! Any ideas, let me know in the comments xD

One final comment, there’s something that I’ve heard many people like in this movie that I’m almost neutral on, and that’s Thorin’s acceptance of Bilbo as belonging in the quest. I don’t love it, it’s too demonstrative for Book!Thorin but I don’t think the filmmakers are well acquainted with the subtlety that’s required in showing Thorin’s grudging but growing appreciation for the usefulness of their burglar—and in this first third of the book (ish) that’s not exactly present anyway.

Conclusion:

Me being nitpicky: 18 (and that’s with only the things that I can think of after roughly two weeks since I watched it last)

Continuity fail: 3 (2 major, 2 minor enough that I’m lumping them together into 1)

Adaptation fail: 8

#here admitting this is not so much a roast as me whining about lots of things in this movie #But at least some of those things are the very things that lead up to the massive issues I have with movies 2 & 3 #Because it is all connected #Salty popcorn for the hobbit movies #Tolkien #ish

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sidhewrites · 1 year

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Today’s heartbreaking entry brings us to our next THREE songs in the lotr musical - a special gift to ease our pain maybe?

The first is Lament for Moria, a stunningly emotional song from Gimli joined by Gandalf. Despite its short length, the lyrics capture the awe that Moria must have once inspired. Spotify / Youtube.

I would love to have more songs in this musical from the dwarves, as there is a distinct sound to it compared to the Elves and Hobbits, but we’ll just have to settle with this one beautiful piece.

The second song is The Golden Wood, another one of my favorites (yes I have been saying that about every single song so far) — a short instrumental piece played when the party walks through Lothlorien, surrounded by laughter bd unseen elves. (Spotify/YouTube)

Finally one of the first songs I ever heard in the LOTR musical, Lothlorien — a big, stunning piece that absolutely deserves to be seen performed, featuring scarf dancing elves, beautiful minimalistic set design, and my favorite costume of the show. Galadriel is clearly meant to be a centerpiece of the musical, and the team behind the show knew how to make it happen with costume, music, and choreography. (Abridged version available to watch here. Unabridged audio only: Spotify / YouTube)

Legolas sings to the party about the history of Lothlorien, singing praises to Galadriel and leading up to one of the strongest singers in the show making her entrance. Galadriel’s signing is tender and ethereal and invokes so much love and wonder as she sings about her forest. We also get some Elvish, which I’m afraid I’ve never been good at translating, but I always love hearing how the composers mix the various languages of Middle Earth into these songs.

#text post #lotr newsletter #lotr daily #lord of the rings #lotr #lotr musical #me crying as I type this up :)) it’s fine

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soralinklokidottirofmirkwood · 1 year

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The twin elflings of Middle Earth part 1.

Lumine and Aether.

Two teenage twin siblings. A boy with golden blond hair in a braided rat tail, golden eyes, and wearing black and brown clothes with gold lining and armor on it and a white and gold scarf adorning his neck and a single feather earring the girl a little bit younger than her brother had his hair and eye color with a matching feather earring but instead of a rat tail she had her hair in a bob cut with two shoulder length hair fringes with two flowers in it, she had on white and blue clothes with gold and black lining, a white and blue scarf with a gold lining. They we're fighting an unknown goddess who is trying to kill them with red and black blocks.

The twins looked at each other giving each other nods "ready Lumine?" The boy asked his sister Lumine, "ready Aether!" Lumine answers her older brother Aether, the twins flew up to the "goddess" while avoiding her odd powers but sadly fate was not on their sides as both twins were grabbed by a tentacle of the blocks as the last thing they see is the Goddess disappearing as everything went black.

I never saw any genshin impact and LoTR and The Hobbit crossover fanfics so this was born I hope you'll enjoy it btw this is my crossover story from my old profile that I found on a website without my permission.

#genshin impact #the hobbit #lord of the rings #platonic #mirkwood elves #crossover #elflings #lumine #aether #thrandiul #legolas #tauriel

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lunellum · 2 months

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Tag game!

Tagged by @sweetlyfez

Last song: Destroy me, by Mr. Kitty

Currently watching: with my babe: the Bear. Also Dungeon Meshi whenever a new ep comes out. By myself: Lovecraft County.

Three ships: Like, random ones? Fav ones? Most seaworthy ones? Can I get away by saying Perihelion, Gem of Sphene and the Nussk? Okay okay uh let's go for ships I like that aren't necessarily my favourites forever because I can't take that pressure. Taakitz (adventure zone balance). Bubbline (adventure time). Breq/Seivarden/Mercy of Kalr (Imperial Radch)

Favourite colour: Blue. Or blueish purple

Currently consuming: Nothing, but I had some yuzu fruit gummies earlier.

First ship: Honestly I think it was something LotR... probably Frodo/Sam? Or if we wanna get more cringe, Gren/Vicious

Place of birth: NL, that's as specific as I'm gonna get, sorry

Current location: Bed! With my wife and both of the cats

Relationship status: see above c:

Last movie: The last one I can remember was the Boy and the Heron and I'm SURE I've seen a movie since but I just cannot remember... I watch more shows than movies.

Currently working on: A scarf, a linocut, and I've perpetually got a dozen story WIPs. Whoops.

Bonus because I felt like adding this one! Currently reading: If found, return to hell, by Em X Liu

#lunellum personal #no tags for now because tagging makes me anxious but pleass do if you wajt #I love these things and am always curious about people

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rowanthestrange · 2 years

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Build-A-Bear Doctors (and companions):

K-9, 4, War; 9, Rose, 10; Amy, 11, Rory; 12, Bill, 13

Top Left: Official K-9 plush; Chubby Cubby (original 1997) dressed in Official Fourth Doctor outfit; Happy Hugs Teddy dressed in Official LotR Hobbit outfit, Official Snoopy Flying Ace outfit (Scarf), and Classic Cowboy boots.

Top Right: Wild Gorilla dressed in Leather Jacket, Handmade v-neck jumper, Black Jeans, Black Combat Boots; Jason Miraz Bear dressed in Union Jack Shirt (and Tutu set), Denim Overalls and Classic Cowboy Boots; Official LotR Hobbit Bear dressed in Official Tenth Doctor Suit (Brown), Black Frame Glasses, Red Canvas High-Tops.

Bottom Left: Rainbow Friends Panda dressed in Costume Half-Moon Glasses, Official Snoopy Flying Ace Bomber Jacket, Plaid Pyjamas (Top only), Light Blue Jeans, Red Canvas High-Tops; Cocoa Cuddles Teddy dressed in Official Eleventh Doctor Outfit, Black Combat Boots, Football; Lovable Lion dressed in Blue Scrubs, Sports Trainers.

Bottom Right: Handmade Twelfth Doctor Bear, Black Sunglasses, Official Twelfth Doctor Outfit and Guitar, Black Combat Boots; Little Black Cub dressed in Official Peter Rabbit Jacket with Handmade patches and button-holes, Astronaut Shirt, Handmade black trousers, Rainbow High-Tops; Official Doctor Who Bear, Official Thirteenth Doctor Outfit, Bearland Boots.

#build a bear #bab #doctor who #Arts and Crafts #fourth doctor #war doctor #ninth doctor #tenth doctor #eleventh doctor #twelfth doctor #thirteenth doctor #mine

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spxllcxstxr · 2 years

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Light up the Sky • M.B & P.T

(Gif not mine)

Request: First of all I’d like to say that I loved the Merry and Pippin domestic hcs (and just so you know you’re literally one of my new favorite lotr tumblrs)! And because I’m lotr trash I would like to request more hcs (or maybe a fic???) if you’re not too busy! Consider: Merry and Pippin (can you tell who my favorite characters are lol) with a hobbit!witch! reader (preferably female but of course it’s up to you). Thanks so much! ❤️ -- @bisexualbumblebeeblogs

Summary: Merry and Pippin are best friends with a witch. Chaos ensues

Warnings: not lotr/silm accurate lmao, you’re one of the blue wizards, hobbit!reader, platonic merry, you, and pip,

Word Count: 900

A.N: god I love me some merry and pippin content, Tolkien’s magic system??? Never heard of it Lmao

•

“Could you make us fly, (Y/n)?”

“Make you fly?” Your eyebrows raise underneath your blue brimmed hat at the preposterous question from your fellow hobbits.

“Don’t mind Pip, (Y/n), he’s just giddy from all the treasure we got at Farmer Maggot’s.” Merry bumps into his younger cousin, eyes lighting up. “You could turn him into a toad if you so desire,”

“Merry!”

“Now a toad is quite tempting…” Tapping your darkwood staff on your chin, you mimic considering Merry’s idea. “The little ones would have such a fun time chasing after you with nets and their grubby little hands,”

Pippin’s eyes widen at the thought. “You wouldn’t do that to me, would you (Y/n)?” His accent becomes thicker with the question.

“Of course not, Pip,” You chuckle, ruffling his curly hair. “I have long forgotten that spell, so you know how many books I would have to go through to remember it again?”

Your fellow hobbit relaxes, hands returning into his deep pockets instead of fiddling with his purple scarf. Though the sun covers the Shire in warmth, Pippin still insists on wearing it.

“Would Gandalf not know the spell?” Merry asks, still grinning at his amphibious suggestion.

“Gandalf?” You furrow you eyebrows. “No, it would be something Radagast would know…”

“Radagast?” Merry asks.

“The brown,”

“Oh! The one from Bilbo’s story!” Pippin bursts excitedly, his grin growing. The younger hobbit jitters with energy. His cousin is in a similar state at the mention of Bilbo’s stories.

“Now, my dear hobbits,” You clap your hands together, a plan forming in your mind. “I don’t know about toads but I do have something you may like,”

Their eyes light up, the resemblance between the Took and the Brandybuck’s more apparent than usual. Mischief really bringing the two families together.

You fumble with your blue cloak, searching for the object you put together mere days ago for this very purpose.

“We’ll what is it?”

“Patience, Peregrin Took,”

Eventually you find what you’re looking for, the little cylinder is tucked deep in your cloak behind so many other things. Quickly, you reveal it to your friends.

“Fireworks,” You whisper, leaning in closer. “But not anything like dear old Gandalf’s. You two will forget he’s even a wizard once you see what I have concocted for us,”

“No way…” The two mumble, dazed at the prospect. They remember Gandalf’s fireworks, the entire Shire remembers them, and how could you possibly top those?

You find that in your many years of living in Middle Earth you’ve been deciding to have more fun with your long, long lifespan. These two reckless hobbits certainly helped you in that decision as well.

They showed you the pleasures of harmless chaos and since then you’ve been grateful for their friendship.

“What will it do?” Merry shakes himself out of his stupor. His eyes never leave the explosive.

“It’s a surprise, Merry, for tonight,” You sneak in back into your robes. “Meet me at the Party Tree at nightfall,”

You throw them one last wink before you glide away to your own hobbit hole. Their laughter and excitement could be heard all the way from the Bywater.

When night falls the Shire the bombarded with the sounds of the chirping crickets and the buzzing of the mosquitos. The humidity is oppressive though it’s nothing you’re not used to. You’ve spent most of your years on Middle Earth in this area. It was your home after all.

By the time you get to the Party Tree, Merry and Pippin are already leaning against the ginormous trunk.

“You’re late,” Merry snarks, watching you trudge through the grass toward the two of them.

“A witch is never late, nor is she early, she arrives precisely when she means to,” You reply, smirking at your friends.

“Alright, alright,” Pippin pipes up, his eyes glinting, even in the darkness of night. “It’s time to light up the sky,”

You and Merry him in agreement, you set up the cylindrical object far enough away from the tree branches. This in particular needed it’s space.

The tip of your staff produces a small flame to light the fuse.

“You two may want to step back, or at least stay close to me,”

The two hobbits scamper towards you, eyes never leaving your invention.

Within seconds the firework zips off into the sky leaving a spiral trail of sparks in its wake. It only takes a moment before there’s a loud burst-like thunder-and the night sky looks like it was set ablaze, rippling with various colors.

First red, then purple, then green, it’s never ending.

You hear your neighbors cheering in delight, children begging their parents to go outside, drunks asking if this was a dream.

For the first time in their lives, Merry and Pippin are silent beside you. Their eyes are wide and reflecting the colors of the changing sky, mouths agape. This was something they’ve never seen before, and they may never see it again; who could tell?

It lasts for quite a few ticks of a grandfather clock before slowly dissolving, leaving the Shire with the dark night sky and the twinkling stars.

“Better than Gandalf, indeed,” The two hobbits breathe out, eyes still trained on the sky way up above them.

With both arms wrapped around their shoulders, you continue to stare up in wonder with them.

•

#lotr #lord of the rings #lotr x reader #lord of the rings x reader #peregrin took #pippin took #pippin x reader #pippin took x reader #peregrin took x reader #merry brandybuck #meriadoc brandybuck #merry brandybuck x reader #meriadoc brandybuck x reader #merry and pippin #gandalf the grey

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laineysbucketlist · 1 year

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Thoughts on the first two LotR movies:

There’s no singing :(

Where the FUCKING HELL is Tom Bombadil. What have they done to him. Where is my precious blorbo.

The music is good. The motif that plays whenever the orcs from Isengard do anything is exceptionally well used.

Gimli and Legolas are both great and their romance is emphasized a lot more than it was in the books.

Unfortunately Peter “Cancel Culture” Jackson removed a lot of the romantic dialogue/sexual tension between Frodo and Sam (“[Sam] ran to Frodo and took his left hand, awkwardly and shyly. He stroked it gently and then he blushed and turned hastily away. […] ‘It’s warm!’ said Sam. ‘Meaning your hand, Mr. Frodo. It has felt so cold through the long nights.’” (Page 219).

Peter “Cancel Culture” Jackson also must have thought very highly of himself when he deemed it wise to alter one of the most important character details from the books: Gandalf in this book doesn’t have the big naturals he is described as having in the book: “[Gandalf] wore a tall pointed blue hat, a long grey cloak, and a silver scarf. He had a long white beard and big naturals.” (Page 24).

When the elves speak, they’re using real Sindarin. I wasn’t sure at first but eventually I started noticing words I knew like dagor (battle) and lithui (ash) that accurately matched the subtitles.

Worth additional attention is the subtitles saying “trust” at one point when Arwen says “estel,” for two reasons. First, estel translates more literally to “hope,” so Sindarin having the same word for hope and trust in that particular context is a really cool linguistic detail. Second, Estel happens to be Aragorn’s deadname, “But [Aragorn] was called Estel, which is ‘hope,’ and his true name and lineage were kept secret…” So Arwen is being very rude with her word choice right now.

On that topic, I do think that the role of Aragorn should have gone to a trans actor. I don’t mean to suggest that I think that cis actors should only play cis characters or that trans actors should only play trans characters, it’s just that this particular role was a very visible and important role and I think that Peter “Cancel Culture” Jackson made a pretty major mistake in this casting decision.

Its pretty obvious that these movies suffered from the political climate of a post 9/11 America.

I’m serious though where the FUCKING HELL is my sweet baby… Tom Bombadil… HOW COULD THEY DO THIS TO HIM!

I’ve never even heard of Howard Shore before now but like I said, he writes a good soundtrack.

This is a bit random but the timeline is shifted very slightly. Boromir dies at the end of the first movie whereas he dies at the beginning of the second book, and the second movie ends before Sam and Frodo reach Shelob. I think Boromir dying as the finale of the first book movie rather than the beginning of the second book was a good decision, but I think ending the second book with anything less than Sam in utter despair and Frodo presumed dead robs it of some of its impact, especially in a trilogy that centers on a theme of hope in the face of complete and utter darkness and despair.

I think Peter “Cancel Culture” Jackson generally did a good job with the first two movies, I just wish he hadn’t cancelled Tom Bombadil.

Tom Bombadil my beloved, how could this happen. How could it come to this. Peter “Cancel Culture” Jackson had no right to omit him from that movie.

This one is especially random but the book The Two Towers never made it very clear what two towers the title refers to, as there are nearly half a dozen important towers here: Minas Tirith, Minas Morgul, Barad-Dûr, Orthanc, and the tower of Cirith Ungol. The most obvious answer would be that the two towers are Minas Tirith and Minas Morgul, as they are the two towers that most closely match each other. However, the characters haven’t yet reached Minas Tirith at this point, and the Frodo and Sam don’t do any more than walk past Minas Morgul. After finishing the book I decided it was most likely that it meant Orthanc and the tower of Cirith Ungol, because that’s where the two climaxes of the book take place. The movie clears it up a bit by explicitly calling Orthanc and Barad-Dûr the two towers, because they are the lairs of the two main villains: Saruman and Sauron respectively.

TOM BOMBADIL WHERE AAAARE YOOOOOUUUUUUU!!!

#lotr #lord of the rings #the fellowship of the ring #the two towers

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