Tumgik
#lots of tags on this one because i really like it
wybienova · 3 days
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dream visit (nostalgia) - a 2nd anniversary katfl comic
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suguann · 2 days
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tags. fem!reader, the overused 'i know we're supposed to be fwb but i fell in love with you anyway' trope, confessions, gojo mentally spiraling during sex over how much he's in love with you because that's a very him thing to do [18+ only]
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Gojo can’t tear his eyes off you as you move above him—riding his cock like this would be the last time you’d ever feel it inside you. That thought twists his insides, his fingers digging into your hips as if you might float away before he ever really had a chance to voice the words he’s been too scared to say.
But he couldn’t really stop you if you wanted to leave—that’s how the groundwork of uncomplicated arrangements like these work, at least in the beginning. He likes to think that a lot has changed since that night in your living room between two drunk, lonely people with nothing to lose aside from your torn underwear in his haste to get them down your soft legs and an old condom tucked away in his wallet.
The feeling sneaks up on him without his knowing, a throbbing in his chest that festers and grows over time until he can’t ignore it anymore or contain it in the proverbial cup of his hands no matter how hard he tries.
It doesn’t dampen how much he wants to mold the shape of his cock inside your tight little cunt, to ruin you for anyone else who thought they even had a chance, to have his name be the first thing you think of when you cum. He wants to make every part of you his, and he only hopes you want the same thing, too.
He groans at the thought, gripping you tight to slam his hips up into you. “Tell me who’s fucking you so good. Tell me who’s the only one that gets to make you cum.”
“You, Toru!” you sob, holding onto his biceps to keep yourself from falling against his chest. It has his balls drawing up tight, and he sucks in a breath to stop this from being over too soon.
“That’s right, pretty girl,” he grunts. “I’m the only one who gets to see you like this. I’m the only one who gets to feel this sweet princess cunt.” He leans up to suck one of your nipples into his mouth, groaning when he feels you clench down around him.
“I-I’m gonna cum,” you choke out.
“Yeah?” His fingers circle over your clit as he shoves his cock deeper inside of you to take you there faster, nipping at the swell of your breast. “Fuck, give it to me, baby. Lemme feel it.”
His name is soft and sweet on your tongue as you cum, squeezing around him until his eyes roll back from how good it feels. It has him following after you, grinding his cock as far as it can go while he pulses and fills you to the brim. There’s so much that he feels it leak out of your little hole and drip down his balls to pool in an uncomfortable wet puddle forming beneath him.
He rolls away from the mess when you both catch your breath, his softening cock still tucked away between your wet thighs. You stroke his hair, your nails lightly scratching his scalp, and he buries his face into your chest, words weighing heavy in his chest.
Maybe he should cut the bullshit already, say what he wants to say, and get let down easy while he still has a chance to recover from rejection—
“Sleep with me?” he asks, voice muffled and a shade of red high on his cheeks.
You giggle, lightly tugging on his hair. “I probably need at least—”
“No,” he cuts you off nervously, heat rising to his ears. “No sex. Just to sleep…here. With me?”
When you don’t say anything right away, he wonders if there’s any way he can take back his words and whether you’d believe him if he told you it was all a joke. But then you tug the blanket over both of you, tucking the corners in so the air from the ceiling fan doesn’t reach your cooling skin, and continue running your fingers through his hair.
There’s a warmth in his chest, which he thinks might be what love feels like.
After a moment, you say, “If you steal the blankets, I’m kicking you off the bed.”
Gojo snorts, smiling against your breast. “But it’s my bed.”
You hum. “Yes, and I’ll do it anyway.”
“Just so we’re clear, I’m still going to fuck you later.”
“Go to sleep, Satoru.” He can’t see it but knows you’re smiling, too.
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Masterlist
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wholoveseggs · 2 days
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Hey, I was wondering if you could write like a fic about the reader having never had an orgasm before, and she has like a really intense one and likes lots of praise kink. Please🥺
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Hold
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18+ ---- {Masterlist} {Tag-List}
You are having drinks with Elijah and you want to tell him about your little problem, in hopes that he will help you with it.
♡♡ Thanks for the request(s) anons! I love his hands and I thought these requests would be perfect together ♡♡
4.9k words - Warnings: smut, hand!kink, slight daddy!kink, finger sucking, squirting, lots of praise, Elijah being sweet...
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You sat in Elijah's lounge room, surrounded by plush chairs and soft carpet, watching him pour out a couple of glasses of whiskey. You watched the way his hands worked, the way they flexed as he gripped the bottle, pouring the golden liquid into the two crystal tumblers.
Elijah had invited you over for drinks, it was technically your third date, although he probably wouldn't consider it a date, it was more of a casual hang out, but you liked to count every time you saw him.
He was so very charming, he made you blush when you least expected it. He would whisper in your ear, and compliment you, but what really turned you on was the way his hands would touch you. It was always light and subtle, just a graze of his fingertips against your thigh, or the small of your back. Your favorite thing was when he would cup your face when he kissed you. His palms were so big and warm, and his fingers would graze the hairline behind your ears.
Something about him made you feel safe, he was the kind of man who took care of things. You wondered if he could be the one who could satisfy you, to give you what you always wanted.
Elijah walked towards you with the drinks in hand, handing you the crystal tumbler filled with whiskey. The contents sparkling in the dim light, the fireplace roaring nearby.
"Thank you," you smiled, taking the drink and bringing it to your lips, letting the alcohol calm your nerves.
He unbuttoned his jacket and sat next to you, causally crossing his legs and turning to face you, his arm draped across the back of the couch.
Your cheeks were flushed as you sipped at the amber liquid. You were so nervous, you had decided to come clean and tell him what was on your mind, and you had no idea how he would react.
"I have a confession," you admitted, your eyes falling to your lap. "But I'm afraid that it might change things between us, and I really like you, I don't want anything to ruin this."
Elijah's hand went to your thigh, gently massaging your skin, sending heat straight to your core.
"I can promise you that there is nothing you could tell me that would change the way I feel about you," he reassured.
Your heart raced, your chest felt tight. You had to tell him, or else it would eat away at you until there was nothing left.
"I've never... I've never had an orgasm before." Your cheeks burned and your heart pounded in your chest, you hated being embarrassed, especially around people you liked.
"Never?" He questioned, his eyebrows raised and his lips slightly parted.
"No, I've tried on my own and with other people, and I've just... never had one." You couldn't even look him in the eye.
"Come here, sweetheart," he whispered, pulling you into his arms, your back against his chest.
He kissed the side of your head, and his hands moved to your hips. You were glad he couldn't see your face, your breath hitching when you felt him nuzzle against your neck.
"Why would you think this would change anything? I would never think less of you because of something like this."
You felt relief wash over you, enjoying the comfort of his embrace. He was a sweet man, of course he wouldn't shame you. You looked up at him, his dark eyes gazing into your own, he gave you a gentle smile and squeezed your arm.
"What if it means something is wrong with me?" You said softly, still feeling insecure, worrying that maybe you would never find a man who would be able to please you.
Elijah ran his hands down your arms, and intertwined his fingers with yours.
"Maybe you just haven't figured out what you like," he suggested, kissing the side of your head.
You blushed again, his words sparking a few dirty ideas, some you were embarrassed to admit, but perhaps a little discomfort is what you needed.
"Well, there is something I know I like," you bit your lip. “But I haven't tried…”
"And what's that?" Elijah pressed.
"Your hands," you breathed, looking at them, intertwined with your own, thinking about what they could do.
"My hands?" He smirked.
"Mhm," you nodded, bringing his hands to your lips and placing a delicate kiss on his knuckles.
"What do you like about my hands?" He asked, his breath warm against your ear, a smirk still evident in his voice.
You swallowed hard, your heart pounding in your chest, wondering if it would ever slow down. He was so hot, it was overwhelming, he was a man who was hard to resist. He was teasing you, waiting for an answer, his warm breath tickling your skin.
You felt very shy, you had never asked for sex from anyone, and the last person you'd slept with was terrible in bed. He never once satisfied you, he probably didn't even know how. Now here you were, cuddled up to a man with literal centuries of experience. The hands you were holding had done unimaginable things, his lips had tasted women from all over the world, and you were sure his cock had brought more than a few to their knees.
"I like the way they feel against my skin," you admitted, his hand was resting on your hip, and you reached for it, bringing it to the front of your shirt, and pressing it against your stomach, sliding it up to your chest. "They're so warm and strong, they make me feel safe,"
Elijah hummed, his hand kneading your breast through the fabric, and his lips pressing to the back of your neck.
"What would you like me to do with them?" He teased, his fingers flicking over your nipple, causing a wave of heat to flood between your legs.
"I want them all over me," you breathed, your hips slowly moving against him.
"You will have to be more specific than that, sweetheart," he purred.
His lips were soft, the hand that was on your breast had now slid up your chest, wrapping around your throat, pulling you closer, his lips on your ear. You closed your eyes, picturing his hands running down your body, gripping your thighs, spreading them apart, his long fingers dipping inside of you.
"Between my legs," you gasped, his hand on your throat made your mind race.
He pulled you up and on to his lap, wrapping his arms around you. He brushed your hair to the side and he began to kiss your neck. His stubble tickled, and you giggled softly, squirming in his arms.
"You're so sweet," he said against your skin.
He continued to kiss your neck, and his hands roamed your body, gently caressing your sides, your stomach, your arms. It was nice, you felt so cared for, but you wanted more, his kisses and gentle touches were turning you on, and your pussy was aching, begging for attention.
You turned your head and pressed your lips to his, his mouth opening, his tongue sliding against yours. You moaned, grinding down on his lap, feeling his hardness under you.
He smiled against your lips and his hands went to your thighs, lifting them up and draping them on the outside of his legs. He spread his knees, and your legs fell open, the cold air hitting your damp panties and making you blush.
One of his arms wrapped around your waist, holding you against him, while the other rested on your inner thigh. He slowly moved his hand up, his fingers trailing higher, his fingertips brushing against the wet fabric between your legs.
"Show me how you touch yourself, guide my hand," he whispered, his warm breath tickling your ear.
You let out a soft moan, reaching between your legs and taking his wrist. You pressed his palm against the outside of your panties, grinding your hips into his hand, desperate for contact. You moaned, his hands were so big, so warm, and so much better than your own.
He hummed, and you could feel him smirking, and you could hear the pleasure in his voice, and it sent a thrill through your entire body.
"Good girl," he praised, his hand moving over your panties, gently rubbing, his thumb finding the swollen bundle of nerves hidden beneath the fabric.
You whimpered, throwing your head back, grinding harder against his palm. Your hand left his, and went to his forearms, your nails digging into his suit sleeves.
"You are so sensitive," he said against your neck, his lips pressing against your pulse. "Can I take these off?" He asked, his fingers hooking into the waistband of your underwear.
"Yes," you moaned, lifting your hips.
He slid your panties down, leaving them halfway down your thighs.
"Put my hand back, sweetheart," he demanded, his fingers dancing on the bare skin of your leg.
You placed his hand back where it was, grinding harder against his palm, moaning softly as he rubbed slow circles against your clit.
"Mmm, look at you," he cooed, his eyes fixed on your face, your eyes closed, lips parted, hips rocking, desperately grinding against his hand. "All you needed was the right touch."
You whined, the pleasure building in the pit of your stomach. You felt the muscles in your thighs tighten, and heat pool between your legs. You were so close, his hands were so much better than yours.
"Give me your hand, sweetheart," he said, removing his hand from between your legs.
"No, don't stop," you whined, grabbing his wrist, trying to put his hand back, but he refused, his fingers wrapping around your wrist.
"Let me show you something," he said, guiding your hand back between your legs, your fingers touching your clit.
You gasped, a shockwave of pleasure rushing through you.
"There you go, rub in small circles," he instructed, his lips on your neck, kissing and nipping at your skin.
Your hips bucked, and you moaned, your head spinning. His hand guided yours, guiding you to rub small, slow circles. "You're so beautiful, baby," he said, his lips pressed against your jaw. "Just like that, sweetheart, you're doing so good."
Your breathing hitched, the pressure in the pit of your stomach tightening, his hand squeezing yours, his palm on top of yours, showing you the pace and rhythm.
Your head fell back against his shoulder, his arm wrapping tighter around you, his hand going up your shirt and caressing your bare skin.
"You're such a good girl," he praised, kissing your neck. "Keep showing me."
His words sent heat straight to your core and your hand stopped moving, too distracted by the feeling of his lips. The way his other hand was running up and down your torso, his fingertips gently caressing your breast.
You felt yourself melting, you loved the way he was touching you and his lips were driving you crazy. 
"It's okay, I’ll take it from here," He purred, his lips grazing your neck, his hand resuming his movements on your clit.
"What do you think about when you do this alone?" He whispered, his free hand squeezing your waist.
"I think about you touching me," you panted, his lips and his hands were too much, it was all you could focus on.
"Is that all you think about?" He asked, his hand on your clit rubbing a little faster, sending jolts of pleasure through your core.
"Your fingers... in me," you gasped, his fingers felt so good against you, he knew exactly where to touch, and he did it with such care and precision, you could hardly stand it.
"Like this?" He asked, his fingers tracing along your slit, gently pressing a single finger inside.
You looked down, watching him sink his finger into your slick heat, moaning as he began to pump in and out, his palm rubbing against your clit.
He widened his legs, spreading yours wider with them, and his pace quickened, pumping a little harder, a little faster, his other hand cupping your breast, his fingers circling and pinching your nipple.
"Why haven't you cum before beautiful? You are so responsive, so sweet," he praised, his teeth nibbling at your ear, sending a thrill through your body, straight to your core.
"I-I don't know," you panted, your chest heaving, your breath coming in short bursts. "I just overthink and I can't focus and-"
He chuckled and his finger curled, stroking that sensitive spot inside, causing your words to catch in your throat, your head falling back and your eyes rolling.
"You're not thinking now, are you?" He asked, his free hand sliding up and wrapping around your throat, applying a light pressure.
His words made you moan, he was right, you weren't thinking, he was fucking the thoughts right out of you.
"Look at you, so perfect," he purred, his teeth grazing the shell of your ear. "I love having you in my lap, you make such pretty sounds," he praised.
His pace quickened, his hand between your legs moving faster, his palm rubbing hard against your clit, his teeth on your neck, his breath hot against your skin.
You writhed and moaned, unable to hold yourself up, his arms were holding you steady, the muscles in your thighs tensed, your toes curling.
You felt something building inside of you, something warm, and intense. It was happening so fast, you couldn't believe it. Was this the thing everyone was talking about? It was overwhelming, your skin was tingling and every muscle in your body tightened, heat spreading through you, your heart pounding, and the pressure was getting tighter and tighter.
"It's okay, just let it happen, relax," he kissed your cheek, his lips brushing against your skin. His knees spread wider, holding your legs open, his hand wrapping around your throat.
You felt it getting stronger, the tension deep within your core. You felt like your body was being possessed by an unknown force, the power of it was indescribable. Elijah held you still, keeping you from writhing in his arms, his finger moving faster.
"Please, don't stop, don't stop, don't stop, please, oh god," you begged, the warmth building inside of you, your legs shaking uncontrollably, every muscle in your body was tensed, your toes curling, your head thrown back, mouth agape.
"That's it, you are doing so good," Elijah whispered.
Your back arched and your hips lifted off of his lap, your thighs clenched together, his hand still working between them. You couldn't speak, couldn't form the words, couldn't make a sound, the feeling inside of you was so powerful. Your legs trembled and a wave of pleasure crashed through your body, starting at your core, and spreading outward, every inch of you tingling. Your vision blurred and your mind was cloudy, and a long, guttural moan fell from your lips.
"Just like that," he purred, his fingers slowing, rubbing slow circles against your clit, easing you down.
You collapsed back onto him, panting, unable to catch your breath, his hands still working between your legs, making the sensation last longer. Your muscles twitched and spasmed, and it felt like a thousand sparks were running under your skin.
Elijah gently rubbed his hand on your thigh, his lips kissing the side of your head, and the other slowly slid out from between your legs, and wrapped around your waist.
"Are you alright?" He asked, a sweet concern in his voice.
You tried to nod, but couldn't, you couldn't move, you were a trembling, quivering mess. You could feel his erection pressed against your back, and you wanted to please him, to return the favor, but you couldn't even sit up straight.
Elijah hummed softly, his hands moving to your stomach, and he wrapped his arms around you, his lips pressing gentle kisses to the side of your head.
He helped you off his lap and set you down on the sofa, kneeling before you, his hands lifting your thighs and pressing them to your chest, practically folding you in half. He was eye level with your pussy, and you blushed, suddenly feeling very exposed.
You could see how wet and swollen you were, your arousal sticking to your skin, glistening in the dim light. His warm breath was fanning against you and it caused a fresh wave of heat in your core.
"So pink and pretty," he said, his lips ghosting over your mound, placing a soft kiss just above your clit. "So sensitive," he purred, his mouth closing over your clit, his tongue swirling.
You moaned, squirming, but he held your thighs firmly, his grip strong, his hands so warm. His eyes met yours as he licked a slow stripe along your slit, the flat of his tongue teasing your clit. You were still very sensitive, and it was overwhelming, your hands went to his head and tried to push him away, but he didn't budge.
He chuckled, his hands coming up and grabbing yours, and he pinned them to your sides. He held you down and he buried his face between your legs, his tongue swirling and lapping at your clit.
You watched the way he devoured you, the sounds coming from his mouth were so filthy. He was humming and groaning, his dark eyes locked with yours. You couldn't look away, it was hypnotizing, the way his tongue moved, the way his lips sucked at your clit.
Elijah released one of your hands and slipped two fingers inside of you, pumping slowly, curling them, humming at the way you squeezed them.
"Elijah," you breathed, your voice raspy, your hand clutching at his hair.
"Yes, sweetheart?" He purred, his thumb finding your clit, and rubbing in slow circles.
You moaned, and you struggled against his grasp, desperate for friction, but he had you pinned.
"You're teasing," you whined.
"Do you want me to stop?" He asked, his tongue darting out and flicking your clit, causing your body to jolt.
"No!" You cried, the pleasure was building, and your hips were trying to roll, but he was holding them down, his fingers moving faster.
He smirked, his mouth closing over your clit again, sucking gently, his fingers pumping faster. His hair was a mess and his lips were shining, coated with your juices. His fingers were thrusting deeper, and his thumb pressed against your asshole, not quite slipping in, but enough pressure to make you squirm.
"Eli, Eli, Eli," you chanted his name, unable to form full sentences, and he seemed to like it, his eyes closed, savoring the sound.
The familiar warmth returned, and the tension was building, the muscles in your stomach tightening, and your legs trembling. Elijah could feel you tighten around his fingers, and his eyes opened, watching you, his mouth never leaving your clit.
He sucked a little harder, his tongue swirling, and you could feel yourself getting close. Your nails were digging into his scalp, your other hand was gripping his arm, and you could barely move.
A long, drawn out moan came from the back of your throat, and you felt it, the wave, the warmth, the intense pressure, building, building, building.
"I'm-I'm-" you tried to speak, but your words caught, and then, just like before, the wave crashed.
Your back arched and your pussy throbbed around his fingers, a gush of wetness flowing out, soaking his face and hand.
"Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck," you moaned, your hands going to his head, your fingers twisting in his hair.
You could feel him smiling against your pussy, his fingers still moving, the sound was wetter, and sloppier, his face covered in your cum.
His lips sucked at your clit, his tongue swirling, the stimulation too much. Your thighs closed around his head and your legs locked him in place.
"Eli, don't, it's too much, it's too much," you pleaded, and his hands went to your thighs, pushing them open, gently kissing your clit before moving back.
You could hear his fingers squelching inside of you, and a soft blush dusted your cheeks, your hand went to his, and you held it still.
He smirked, moved up and captured your lips in a kiss, the taste of yourself making you moan. You ran your fingers through his hair, his mouth hungry against yours. His erection pressed into your thigh, the feeling making you desperate for more.
You pulled back, his eyes were wild and dark, filled with lust, and his lips were swollen and slick. You reached down and undid his belt, slowly pulling it off, keeping your eyes locked with his.
You unzipped his pants and reached into his boxers and took his length in your hand, a deep groan rumbling in his chest, his eyes closing as you stroked him.
The feeling of him was nice, it was warm, and his skin was soft. You liked the way he responded to you, the way he bit his lip, and the way his eyes fluttered.
He took his cock from your hand and rubbed the tip along your slit, up and down, coating himself with your arousal.
He was big and you wondered if he could make you cum with his cock alone. The way he had you angled, you could see everything, and his dick was sliding up and down, teasing you, hitting your clit with every stroke.
Your hands went to his shirt, and you started unbuttoning, the fabric sliding off, exposing his toned torso, his skin so warm and smooth, and his arms looked so good. You could stare at his forearms all day, you wanted him to pin you down, hold you still while he fucked you.
His lips claimed yours again, swallowing your moans, his hands pushing your legs further into the couch. Slowly sinking his cock inside of you, bottoming out.
You whimpered against his lips, his dick felt amazing, you were so full, his pubic bone pressed against you.
"Look at that," he cooed, taking a quick glance down, then meeting your eyes, "we fit together perfectly."
You loved the way he overwhelmed you, the way he touched you, the way he kissed you, the way he spoke, so low and gentle.
He slowly pulled out, leaving only the tip inside, and then thrusting forward, his pelvis grinding against yours. He kept a steady pace, his strokes slow, deep and hard.
You moaned into his mouth, your hands clinging to his shoulders, his arms, anywhere you could touch.
"Are you okay?" He asked, his words spoken against your lips, his nose nuzzling yours.
"Mhm," you hummed, your eyes shut tight, enjoying the feeling of him stretching you, his length reaching places that had never been touched before.
His finger gently traced over your bottom lip, and you opened your mouth, sucking his finger inside, swirling your tongue around it, biting the pad gently.
"Such a good girl," he purred, his eyes darkening.
You moaned around his finger, his pace quickening, his cock hitting a new spot, and it sent a rush through your core.
He removed his finger and pressed his lips against yours, his tongue parting your lips, slipping into your mouth, his hand holding the back of your neck.
"Daddy," the word slipped from your mouth and you froze. You didn't mean to say it, you were just so distracted, and in the moment, it slipped out.
Elijah chuckled, a wicked grin spreading across his lips, "Really?" He asked, his voice low and seductive.
Your heart was pounding, you didn't mean to say that, why did you say that? You opened your mouth to apologize, but he silenced you with a kiss
The kisses were deep, passionate, and it made you weak. He knew exactly what he was doing, his pace and rhythm was perfect, and he was driving you crazy.
The sounds of him thrusting into you, the smell of sex, his mouth on yours, the way he was touching you, it was so intoxicating, you never wanted him to stop.
He groaned, his pace quickening, and his cock hit that sweet spot, sending a jolt of pleasure through your body. You clung to him, your arms around his neck, and you moaned, the feeling so intense.
"That's it," he purred, his hands moving to the underside of your thighs, holding you open, his pace fast and hard, his pelvis slapping against yours.
"Oh, god, yes, daddy, fuck," you whined, unable to control the words coming from your mouth.
"Yes, sweetheart, cum for me," he growled, his lips brushing against the shell of your ear.
You were so close, the warmth was returning, the now familiar heat pooling in your belly, and the tension building. Your hands gripped his biceps, the muscles flexing under your fingertips, his pace quickening.
"So sweet, so innocent, never cumming on a cock. What a shame," he mumbled, his teeth scraping over your skin, his tongue licking and soothing. "All those boys, touching themselves, wishing they were the ones to make you cum, but you chose me," his voice was low, his words making you flush, the way he was praising you was intoxicating.
"Only you," you gasped, the feeling in your core getting stronger, the waves of pleasure becoming more frequent.
He smiled, his hands moving to the back of your knees, pushing them towards you, your thighs pressed against the sides of your chest. He was folding you in half, his hips snapping forward, his cock hitting a new spot. "That's right, baby," he cooed. "No one else," his thrusts were faster and harder, the sound of his hips slapping against yours filled the room.
Your hands moved to the back of the sofa, trying to hold yourself steady, your back arching, the pleasure almost unbearable. "I'm gonna, I'm gonna, Eli-" you cried, the wave of warmth, the tension in your belly, the sparks under your skin, all coming to a peak.
The feeling exploded within you, your muscles spasming, Your back arched as the waves of pleasure washed over you, crashing through every cell of your body. You couldn't speak, couldn't moan, your mouth open in a silent cry, the euphoria indescribable.
Your head fell back and your legs trembled, and you felt a rush of warmth coat his cock, squeezing him so hard he was pushed out, but he quickly slid back in, the sensation making you squeal.
"That's it, cum on my cock, good girl," he said, his hands gripping your hips, his thrusts deep and hard.
You could see it in his face, the way his eyebrows drew together, his jaw slack, the veins in his neck were prominent, his hair disheveled. He was close, and it was turning you on, the sight of him losing control, knowing that you were the cause of it, was exhilarating.
His thrusts became faster and sloppy, his grip on your hips tightening, his face buried in the crook of your neck. Your hands went to his hair, tugging at the strands, pulling him closer.
He moaned, his hips bucking, his cock pulsing inside of you. You could feel it, the rush of warmth, his cock twitching, the sound of him panting in your ear, his hot breath fanning over your neck.
You were both covered in sweat, his breathing heavy. You wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him close, holding him against you.
His head rose, and his eyes met yours, and he gave you a sleepy smile, his lips capturing yours in a lazy kiss. You hummed, your hand gripping his chest, sliding up to hold on to his shoulders.
Elijah groaned, his hands moving to your thighs, pulling them down, and wrapping your legs around his waist. Picking you up, and carrying you to his bathroom.
Soon, you were pressed against the cool tile of the shower, his strong hands massaging the soap into your skin, the water trickling down his muscular back. His fingers trailed over your hips, tracing the curves of your waist.
"So.. daddy?" He asked, his eyes sparkling.
"I'm so sorry," you apologized, blushing, covering your face with your hands.
He removed your hands and gave you a sly grin.
"I think I like it," he whispered, his voice low and husky, scooping you up and pinning you against the wall, his lips claiming yours in a heated kiss.
The water was still running, but it wasn't important, because the only thing on your mind was him. His hands, his lips, his body, his voice, the way he held you, the way he loved you, the way he made you cum.
After, the two of you were lying on his bed, naked and spent, his arms wrapped around you, his lips brushing over your forehead.
"You know you aren't leaving my bed for a few days, right?" He asked, his voice deep and sleepy.
"Is that so?" You teased, nuzzling your face against his chest, inhaling his scent.
"Yes," he answered, his fingers lazily tracing patterns on your skin.
"How many times do you think you can make me cum in the next 72 hours?" You asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Are you challenging me?" He asked, a smile playing on his lips.
"Maybe," you purred, kissing his jaw, your fingers moving to his chest.
"Well," he began, his hand cupping your ass, his face breaking out into a wide grin, "let's find out.”
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♡♡ Tag-List ♡♡
♡ @gorgeouslydangerous ♡ @starkleila ♡ @lydia1369sworld ♡ @notleylaaa ♡ @vampiresluv ♡ @vamprium ♡ @myanmy ♡ @xflowerbombxo ♡ @maryvibess ♡ @always-and-forever-daydreaming ♡ @criminallminds ♡ @theesexystallion ♡ @rosemarypotion ♡ @spnaquakindgdom ♡ @amournoir ♡ @loving-and-dreaming ♡
♡ @meeom ♡ @damienmorton ♡ @wickedmuse ♡ @sunkissedebony97 ♡ @idk00sblog ♡ @savannaounana ♡ @cs-please ♡ complicatedandconfusing-25 @hamiltimes ♡ @akala6670229 ♡ @yeaiamme2 ♡ @itsjulzandmydiamonds ♡ @spideysbabe
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deadbranch · 2 days
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So dumb question time again. I saw where you reblogged the callsign post. But you said y’all just call them nicknames.
When I did the barest do research, I know should’ve looked harder, the only place I really found that used the term callsign were pilots.
(Also I forgot the word pilot and almost just wrote flier but had enough sense to google what are people that fly planes called)
In the COD wikis I’ve read they use the word Alias(es) and not callsign.
Is callsign just a pilot term? Or is it also used throughout the military?
I know I could probably google it more but honestly your lived experiences and even opinions give an interesting perspective on it all.
Sorry your tags got me thinking about where the term that is used so heavily in the fanfic side of the fandom came from and why we use it.
You mean this post?
Ok. Here's where the fandom rage quits my blog:
The term "callsign" is used incorrectly in roughly 99% of military-themed fanfiction.
In the army, a callsign (or call sign) is specifically used in radio communications, not as a moniker or nickname to be used in in-person communications.
More precisely, a callsign is a combination of alpha and numeric characters, like Echo 3-1, Bravo-6, or Watcher-1. Callsigns are also used to ID listening posts, HQs, and permanent telecom installations, such as 620-Kilo in Cold War West Berlin. The radio operator on site would ID as 620-Kilo rather than an individual callsign, and when their shift is over, the next operator ID as 620-Kilo also.
Only field operators use individually designated callsigns, unless the callsign ID the vehicle (like a tank or armored-heavy), which means anyone using the radio for the vehicle ID as the vehicle callsign.
A callword (or call word) is the name of a receiver or station using letters/words but no numbers, like Actual, Cloud Castle, or Whiskey Foxtrot.
U.S. pilots (navy/air force/army air cavalry) are different from most of the military. Pilots get permanent callsigns (not always with numbers) during training and it follows them during their career. To be fair, they spend a lot of time on the radio, so having a permanent callsign makes sense.
Names like Ghost, Soap, and Gaz are aliases or nicknames. They're not actually callsigns.
The Call of Duty fandom fell in love with using the term callsign because it sounds more "military" to their ears than alias or nickname.
In my writing, I avoid using the term callsign because it's usually not the proper word to use in a given scene. To be fair, I have yet to write a pilot fic or one where there's extended training discussion about the proper use of radio-telephone operation in field ops.
My husband was an airborne RATELO (radio-telephone operator) and had a callsign for several years, but no one ever used his callsign unless literally talking over the SINCGARS system with him. I operated a radio for a week and I don't even remember what my callsign was. It was something forgettable from the NATO alphabet* with a number after it.
In the army, in person you're either your last name or your nickname.
SpecOps often call each other by their first names ("what's up, Dave?" LOL), their last name, or a nickname.
CIA & CID use aliases. They call those guys spooks for a reason. You never know who you're actually taking to since they never use their real name.
In the context of Call of Duty: Modern Warfare, I still maintain that Alex Keller isn't Echo-1's government name. He's CIA. That was never his name. And he was never here. :)
*The NATO Phonetic Alphabet, for reference:
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MASTERLIST
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blingblong55 · 1 day
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Darling toy -John Price NSFW
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Based on a request:
Hi! I love your writing it’s just mwah. This is my first time requesting anything so I’m a little shy but I hope you’ll consider it. I was thinking Price x Fem!Reader with kinda D/S dynamics. Reader who is usually a brat but for once is actually being ‘compliant’ or just sweet in general! And Price rewarding her. I’d loveeee to see that! ---- F!Reader, MDNI, smut, 18+, established!relationship, ----
A/N: this one is really shitty so I think I'll come back and rewrite it...sorry
A relationship with him is far from "normal" especially since you are more of a brat and he is a strict dom. He had a lot of past relationships that were very obedient but you....oh you're a devil. And he likes to play with you. 
Every time he wanted to have sex, you'd oppose and play games with him. He'd never force you of course but when you'd give consent, he would fuck you senseless. Your pretty face was red from the times he slapped you, wanting to hear you scream his name.
He wanted to get adventurous at the beach and all you would do was pretend some lame book was more important.  
However, today you felt like finally giving in. You knew he was having a hard day and before you gave him some snarky comment, he walked into his office, shutting the door behind him. Not once did he even try to make some comment towards you. 
After much hesitation, you knock on his door but not one answer comes through. You walk in, that tight skirt of yours letting those hips of yours sway and give him a better view. "Not today, darling," he sighs out. You're a brat, aren't you? You never listen, always go against his word so why must you listen today? It's not bad when all you want to do is please him. 
You shake your head, walking closer and all he does is lean back on his chair. "I said not today," he mumbles and you smile, slowly kneeling and getting in between his thighs. Your soft hands undoing his belt all while John smirked. Maybe today was a good day after all. 
Your gaze falls on his as over his boxers, you stroke his cock. "Want to relieve some stress?" you so innocently say and he smiles. He adjusts himself on the chair and moves your hair out of your face. "Oh darling," he smiles and leans in, kissing you before he pulls his boxers down. "C'mon darling, just once," his calloused hands brushed your hair away from your pretty face. 
Your plump lips meet his swollen tip. Your tongue licking and tasting his lengthy cock. A groan escapes from his lips because of this, it's sweet to feel you take in his size. John begins to gain speed on this, his hand pushing your mouth further into his cock. The pleasure mounting to get him near the edge but he wants to make this last, he needs to make it last. 
You didn't push away as you always did, you were allowing it and giving him more. His cock slowly throbbed as the sensation felt good. His groans, "feels so fucking good," a smile appears on his lips. His large hands pushed your mouth further in, making you gag at his size. You try and push away to catch your breath but he keeps you in your place. "Not so fucking fast," he growls. 
Throat inspection he calls it. 
Your eyes are teary as his fat cock fucks itself deeper into you.
His balls tighten as he feels pre-cum leak into your mouth. Your rhythm slows down, trying to tease him more. He can't have that though, not now. He needs this. 
"Don't fucking test me, darling," he says and fucks his cock deeper into you. His cum leaking into you, filling your mouth, and letting out a sigh of relief. "Fuuuuckkk," he moans and pulls out of your mouth. Almost immediately, he kisses you and smiles. "That's my good girl," he whispers and picks you up to sit you on his lap. Your pretty little skirt allows his thick fingers to caress your thighs. 
"Love you, doll," he kisses you once more and keeps you tightly close to him. 
Tags:
@mirzamsaiph @liyanahelena @uniquecroissant @goldenmclaren @ghostslillady @moonsua1 @frizzseaberries @frazie99 @idklols @katybaby00 @saoirse06 @vampsquerade @alxexhearts @baldwinhearts @Juneonhoth @tiredmetalenthusiast @jinxxangel13 @strangepuppynightmare @enarien @Simonssweetgirl @luvecarson @nellsbobells @coralwitchdreamland @ikohniik @nobodys-coffee @strawberrychita @sae1kie @queen-ilmaree @Llelannie @Macnches2 @bbyfimmie @anonymuslydumb @avidreadee123 @talooolaaloolla @skelletonwitch @bittermajesties @1234beeandpuppycat @sparky--bunny @honestlyhiswife @@who-can-appease-me @ghostwifeyy @konigssultwithghost @pinkblossomsworld @lovelyvqer @the_royal_bee @beansproutmafia @luvecarson @soapybutt17 @asianbutnotjapanese @a-goose-with-a-knife @foxface013 @born4biriyani @thegreyjoyed @mychemichalimalance @marshiely @iruzias @@sleepyycatt
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aceghosts · 1 day
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Rooney Shepard (They/Them): RELIC AU
There are stranger things I've learned on the outside Separated by an open door I find it hard to reach the end of my timeline Salivating 'cause I wanted more Is this the end or is this the beginning? -Too Close/Too Late by Spiritbox
[Template Credit]
Tagging (Opt In/Out): @bbrocklesnar, @marivenah, @alexxmason, @captmactavish, @carlosoliveiraa, @socially-awkward-skeleton, @nightbloodbix, @voidika, @strangefable, @captastra, @amalkavian, @katsigian, @cassietrn, @g0dspeeed, @clicheantagonist, @cloudofbutterflies92, @direwombat, @onehornedbeast, @thedeadthree.
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contact-guy · 2 days
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heyyy I hope it's okay to send an ask! I just wanted to know about your art process, if you got any advise. Because I'm in love with your SH doodles, they're so dynamic and lively and the shading is such a nice accent yet it remains somewhat minimalistic? I'm relatively decent at realism but want to develop my own character in drawing more and I'm wondering how you arrived at yours, did you have a method? Thanks in advance^^
love to talk about DRAWING......
The short answer is that because I want to draw them a lot, and have limited time, I can't be too precious about how the final result looks! So a lack of perfectionism and a desire for speed ends up forcing me to simplify and stylize them. This was an organic process (if you scroll down my art tag you can see I was drawing them with a bit more detail, finish, and care a few months ago - I was illustrating vs what I'm doing now, cartooning).
Ideally when you are cartooning, every line of the character's face is doing work to make them THEM, and to tell a story. No unnecessary lines! I find that story is best expressed through eyes, eyebrows, and mouth (this might be different for you). Those features can and should change shape to express emotion. They are usually what I draw first, to figure out the emotion, and they're what I spend the most time tweaking.
The rest of the features - face shape, cheekbones, nose, forehead, ears, hairline - are less emotive, less 'plastic', they don't change shape much. These are doing work to make the character recognizable. I try to keep them simple and have a few simple rules that I can remember about each character.
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(Watson is tricky because of his mustache! I've found that treating it as part of his mouth rather than a distinct piece works best, but even so it makes his face less emotive - which, honestly, works for the character, as he is less demonstrative than Holmes)
I'll usually do a simple underdrawing to figure out what the body is doing - trying to capture the energy of a pose and, again, thinking about what story the body is telling.
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Then I 'ink' in the clothing, following the lines of the body and gravity. Victorian clothing is fun to draw, I find that the structure around the shoulders and neckline lends itself to expressive poses. I did a bunch of Victorian clothing studies a few months ago and felt like I built up a 'library' in my head so that I don't need to reference it every time.
Shading is incredibly minimal and quick. In really simple drawings, its purpose is usually to distinguish characters from the background. In more detailed ones, it's to give them a little dimension and focus the eye to the faces.
Every choice I make is in service of readability rather than beauty or accuracy, if that makes sense. So it is quite a different mindset than when you're drawing realistically or painting.
I hope this was helpful! I am a professional artist but whenever I get sucked into a fandom I find myself making leaps and bounds in my craft because I want to draw so MUCH and don't care about making it polished...truly shout out to hyperfixation for the gifts it brings
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olderthannetfic · 2 days
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Okay I NEED to know what the current most popular slash ships are, being on tumblr just feels like slash fandom is dying out, and I'd like to look up some ships because even if I don't like them, following other slash shippers feels so much nicer than seeing people bash them all the time.
--
On AO3, the m/m category is a tag like any other.
That means you can go directly to that tag and look at the sidebar, either in general or filtered for the past year. (No need to rely on those faulty ship stats.)
Broadly, the really massive juggernauts are still going, chugging along on fanon long after their canons have ended or gone to shit. A bunch of fandoms that younger people like are huge. And a lot of older people who used to only be into Western fandoms fell for The Untamed a few years ago and are now into lots of other danmei and BL fandoms. Thai dramas seem to be really heating up lately.
--
Here's the sidebar in general:
Castiel/Dean Winchester (108832)
Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski (68896)
Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter (66461)
Sherlock Holmes/John Watson (66324)
James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers (60107)
Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens) (51611)
Steve Rogers/Tony Stark (44020)
Sirius Black/Remus Lupin (42921)
Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson (42063)
filtering those out:
Bakugou Katsuki/Midoriya Izuku (39754)
Lan Zhan | Lan Wangji/Wei Ying | Wei Wuxian (37086)
Jeon Jungkook/Kim Taehyung | V (36739)
Keith/Lance (Voltron) (32031)
Dean Winchester/Sam Winchester (30843)
Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood (29711)
Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin) (29591)
Will Graham/Hannibal Lecter (28681)
Jeon Jungkook/Park Jimin (28574)
Dazai Osamu/Nakahara Chuuya (Bungou Stray Dogs) (28260)
Or filtered for updating in the past year:
Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens) (14878)
Sirius Black/Remus Lupin (12640)
Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson (10617)
Dazai Osamu/Nakahara Chuuya (Bungou Stray Dogs) (10353)
Bakugou Katsuki/Midoriya Izuku (8964)
Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter (8391)
Alhaitham/Kaveh (Genshin Impact) (8284)
Regulus Black/James Potter (7721)
filtering those out:
John "Soap" MacTavish/Simon "Ghost" Riley (6879)
Castiel/Dean Winchester (6751)
Blackbeard | Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet (6723)
Getou Suguru/Gojo Satoru (6253)
Lan Zhan | Lan Wangji/Wei Ying | Wei Wuxian (6245)
Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV) (6228)
Alex Claremont-Diaz/Henry Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor (5725)
Han Jisung | Han/Lee Minho | Lee Know (5632)
Jeon Jungkook/Kim Taehyung | V (5201)
Will Graham/Hannibal Lecter (4199)
In general, I would look at things with canon gay and/or at big anime, c-drama, and kpop RPF fandoms.
And block dickheads liberally when you see them in the tags on tumblr.
If you want to hang out with oldschool people, you could always come to Escapade con. We should be having an online one some time in the summer. There's also a discord. We're currently doing a group watch of Mysterious Lotus Casebook among other things.
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apolladay · 1 day
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Some options are paraphrased and some have additional info in the picture below.
So this one obviously looks a bit funny.. there was a snafu.. a little mistake.. a little oopsie ok? anyway luckily I screenshot asks sometimes because as you can some of these options are a lot longer than I could add and paraphrasing wasn't really possible. I do hope the Anon who sent it still finds it though 🙂
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samwhump · 3 days
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a (very inexhaustive, wincest-heavy) sam whump reclist
@transfemmesam asked me for Sam whump recs a few days ago, and I've had other requests in the same vein before (I can't imagine why.../s) so I thought I would throw this together, since these authors deserve all of the love and support for their contributions to our li'l fandom corner.
like I mentioned in the title, this is not at all a comprehensive list; I have at least ~200 more fics in my to-read queue that could thematically fit here, but alas, I have stupid shit like a job and a body and a dog to take care of, so. I'm always happy to get recs along these lines, so if you notice anything important missing, hit me UP. (and don't take any omissions as any specific commentary by me -- it's likely I just haven't had the chance to read it yet, haha.)
disclaimers:
some (most, honestly) of these contain potentially triggering and dark content, including but not limited to rape/noncon, torture, and suicidal attempts & ideation. I have tried to note content warnings where applicable, and most of the works are hosted on ao3, so the tags should have most of the information you need to make an informed decision. that being said, tread with caution. all of the summaries provided are from the original author, with warnings added after by me.
the list is in alphabetical order and separated into wincest and gen categories. a lot of the gen is also focused on the sam & dean relationship, because...I am what I am. and what I am a sucker for these two dipshits. there is also a brief section at the end with a few fics that don't fit into either category.
gen
All That Goes Unspoken by amnesiawife:
A case forces Sam to confront something long kept buried. (Set nebulously in season 12.)
CW: discussions of past rape/noncon, victim blaming
Beneath the Trees 'verse by Lise (5 works total, starting with Beneath the Trees, Where Nobody Sees):
Sam doesn't go to Stanford. Everything goes downhill from there.
CW: suicidal ideation
a boy is a cage by ad_castra:
After expelling Gadreel from Sam's body, Dean thinks they're in the clear. If only they were that lucky. // S9 fic wherein Gadreel's grace causes some adverse side-effects in Sam's mind.
CW: past referenced rape/noncon, body horror
body of proof by Askance (doomcountry):
There are things Sam hasn't told his brother. They're all in the envelope laid on Dean's pillow.
CW: heavy discussion of past rape/noncon
break these bones 'til they're better by redskyatmorning:
After Sam’s torture at the hands of the British Men of Letters, the latest in a long string of violations, he is rescued by Dean and Mary – and forced to ponder his broken relationship with his own body. Months later, when Sam is resurrected and tormented by Lucifer yet again, Dean confronts Mary and Sam gets his revenge against the devil.
catching my death (staring out an open window) by ad_castra:
Sam gazes at the window, catches the faint pink hue tinting the sky. It’s so realistic - he could breathe in the fresh air if he were really here. ----- They got Sam out. Sometimes, just knowing that isn't enough.
CW: implied past rape/noncon
Death of Convenience by WilsonTheMoose:
It should have been easy. Wendigos are no joke but daylight slows them. The weather's been unpredictable though and perfect, idyllic hunts don't exactly stay that way where they're concerned. Or Sam has one card to play and never stops to think that Dean would care if he killed himself.
CW: suicidal ideation, references to suicide
Echoes of Hell by The_Nightbreaker:
It wasn't real. He wasn't in Hell anymore. That's what he tried to tell himself over and over. But two centuries of torture don't disappear in a day. Sam struggles with visions of Hell, fighting to maintain his grip on reality. Dean hates that he can't protect his brother from what isn't real—but curse him if he doesn't try. When the boys stumble on a case with ties to the Devil himself, will they be able to pull themselves together in time to stop the sacrifices? Or will the echoes of Hell finally overtake them? Aka, season 7, but the plot is Hell trauma, not leviathans.
CW: suicidal ideation
Evening Shadows by withthekeyisking:
Sam is hallucinating the monster who tortured him for nearly two centuries, Dean feels like he's failing his brother, and a diner waitress bears witness.
CW: past rape/noncon
Everything Dies Given Time by Lise:
AU from 5.03. Sam discovers something wrong with himself, and learns to live with it. Only a lot less functional.
CW: suicide/temporary character death
The Freedom to Be Loud by jribbing:
It hadn’t occurred to Dean that maybe Sam remembered so much about that little nowhere town because something memorable had happened there.
CW: referenced past rape/noncon
golgotha by redskyatmorning:
There’s a vacancy on the throne of hell, and Sam is desperate enough to save Dean from Michael’s possession to give into the abyssal depths of his own darkness.
Head Space by ameliacareful:
A witch curses Sam leaving him blind, deaf, and bedridden. Left with only the inside of his own head and the occasional touch, Sam begins to unravel.
CW: suicidal ideation
Hiraeth by inkandpaperqwerty:
(n.) a homesickness for a home to which you cannot return, a home which maybe never was; the nostalgia, the yearning, the grief for the lost places of your past "Dean... I made a really big mistake." For a second, Dean actually thought things were going okay. He was out of Hell, Sam agreed to stop drinking demon blood, they had just wrapped up a successful hunt... for once, everything was okay. And then it wasn't. "I overdosed." Not at all.
CW: suicide attempts, suicidal ideation
if i could leave (i would've already left) by serendipity0930:
“I have a mission from God for you,” the Angel whispers to the man. “It is time for you to do what you were born to.” The man’s face twists into a smile, delighted over being chosen by Him, a purpose from God digging into his heart, carving out a place to fester. “Hunt.” ... 05x03 AU where Zachariah is even more determined to keep the brothers apart and hunters are all too willing to take Lucifer's True Vessel off the board for good
CW: referenced suicide
It's A River (But Not In Egypt) by Lise:
He's still a liar. Maybe always has been.
CW: toxic Sam/Lucifer dynamics
Kindred Instruments by PinBitch:
They’re in a tug of war and Sam is the rope. He doesn’t need to be alive for that. OR Sam dies in detox, being flung against the walls of a metal box will do that to you. Dean and Ruby pick up the pieces.
CW: temporary main character death, permanent supporting character death
lazarus trick by katsidhe:
Sam's alive, so everything is gonna be okay. 13.22 coda.
Let All Mortal Flesh Keep Silence by Lise:
Sam's back. He's in one piece. That's the problem.
CW: self-harm
love is like ghosts by redskyatmorning:
I’m poison, Dean had said instead of I’m sorry. Well, Sam wants to say, what does that make me? What the hell does that make me? (A look into Sam's mind in the aftermath of the Gadreel possession.)
The Other Brother by RadioFriday:
Sam and Adam are pulled from the cage at the same time. Sam is not right, and Adam, stuck as his caretaker, is not pleased.
Oxygen by inkandpaperqwerty:
“Cas! Cas, please! Please, answer me! Cas!” Castiel ignores Dean for several minutes, but then Dean gives him an opening that might help him complete his mission. So, he goes to investigate, and what he finds is a very bloody, nearly dead Sam. Dean tells him where the injuries came from, and Castiel quickly becomes confused. It doesn't make sense, but Dean tries to explain it to him, and slowly... Castiel begins to understand.
CW: suicide attempt
Post Hoc, Ergo Propter Hoc by AmberSock:
Sam waits, kneeling, for his execution. What if Dean hadn't missed?
CW: temporary character death
Safety In Distance by GalaxyThreads and SpiritClusters:
The Mark of Cain is a brand of violence. Sam was an idiot to think that he'd be exempt from it, just because he and Dean are siblings.
sometimes a kind of singing by adi_rotynd:
Sam gets cursed. They're dealing with it. Jack can see souls. That one they're not dealing with quite as well.
CW: past referenced rape/noncon
Soul Windows by GalaxyThreads and Spirit Clusters:
A few months after his birth, Jack learns how to see souls. Then he comes to a realization about the Winchester brothers, Sam in particular, and it's not a pleasant one. (gen)
Starry Night by keepcalmsmile:
Sam attempts suicide-by-monster. Dean tries to help. It sort of works...until it doesn't.
CW: suicide attempts, suicidal ideation
such fragile, broken things by The_Bookkeeper:
Sam wishes that Dean would just get it over with already.
The Tale of Sir Galahad by keepcalmsmile:
Sam once said he could never be clean like Sir Galahad. Dean assumed he was just talking about the demon blood. Turns out, Sam was talking about something else too. WARNING: Extended discussions of the aftermath of rape and childhood sexual abuse (but NO description of the actual events). Happy(ish) ending, but potentially very triggering.
CW: past rape/noncon, mentioned CSA
They Hammered in His Teeth by jribbing:
Sam has a secret.
CW: suicidal ideation
today's troubles (are history tomorrow) by a_good_soldier:
"It's not really something I know how to share," Sam had said. In which Dean figures he ought to help Sam out a bit.
Touch and Go by themegalosaurus:
Tag to 9.19 (Alex Annie Alexis Ann) in which Dean realises why, exactly, Sam is so angry about what happened with Gadreel.
trust fall by ad_castra:
“I’m nothing like you,” Sam hisses. Nevermind relating to the anguish of going it alone. Nevermind that he knows what it is to be strapped down and forcibly cleansed against his will. Sam wonders if these trials are purifying Crowley as well. 
Words Like Glass by broken_cinders:
Dean never figured the cage wouldn't leave a mark. He was prepared for memories, flashbacks, and nightmares. He wasn't expecting the words Sam brought back with him or the way they made him seem just a breath beyond Dean's reach.
Wound and Unwound by fascra:
Sam stops eating spring of his freshman year.
CW: eating disorder
wincest (dean/sam)
Brittle by thecapn:
Sam Winchester has an eating disorder.
CW: eating disorder
Don't You Cry No More by sixtysevenlmpala (schittyfic):
The first time Sam gets badly hurt on a hunt, he doesn’t cry. Dean does.
Fall On Your Knees by dollylux:
Sam doesn't quite make it home on the last day of school before winter break.
The Fall Will Probably Kill You by killabeez:
Set between 7.04 and the aftermath of 7.07. Dean is not as okay as he'd like you to think. Neither is Sam.
CW: self-harm
Feels so good to feel again by Trojie:
The pain keeps Lucifer at bay, at least to start with.
Follow In Your Form by withthekeyisking:
Sam is hallucinating Lucifer in the wake of Cas bringing his Hell Wall crashing down. To make matters worse, it seems like this has his dormant powers flaring back to life.
Last Temptation by merle_p:
Sam is running a fever again, the kind of fever no Ibuprofen or cold compress will bring down, the kind of fever that is eating him up alive, eviscerating him from the inside. He is too hot and too cold and too pale, delirious and shaking, resonating with whatever divine energy the trials are subjecting him to, and Dean is not sure how much longer he can stand to see him be in this state. Because Sam is quite possibly dying, and there is nothing Dean can do to stop it. Because Sam is dying, and he just. Won’t. Shut. Up.
CW: mentioned past rape/noncon
leeches by Anonymous:
Sam discovers a spell to make everybody forget him. He’s convinced it’s for the best. Pre-Stanford.
CW: attempted kidnapping/torture
Make Thick My Blood by themegalosaurus:
“You’re going to kill me, Dean,” Sam says, eventually. And all Dean can say is, “I think I am.” A season 10 AU, set after 10x14 ('The Executioner's Song'). Cas finds a solution that might cure the Mark of Cain; but if they're going to go through with it, Sam has a terrible price to pay.
CW: mentioned past rape/noncon
Prophecy of an Abomination by ashitanoyuki:
Sam is kidnapped by fanatically religious hunters and crucified. Coming back from this won't be easy. Canon-divergent from midway through season 2.
Recall by De_Nugis:
Sam's having a hard time telling what's real and what isn't, especially when it comes to some voicemails from Dean.
The Room Upstairs by brokenlittleboy:
Sam comes back from hell, but he’s inside-out and all wrong, and Dean can’t fix him.
CW: mentioned past rape/noncon
Ruin You (and its companion fic Worth) by Mumble_Bee:
Cole fucks Sam with Demon!Dean watching from a devil's trap, snarling that anyone would dare touch what was his. “I told you I don’t care what you do to his face or his blood or his fucking nose,” Dean growled, “but you put your dick anywhere near him and I will end you.” “Better hurry up then, Dean, because I don’t think I can wait much longer.”
CW: explicit rape/noncon
Snowed In by HelloStarlingFics:
When working a case, Sam and Dean get stuck out in a shack in the woods when the snow comes in hard and fast. Trouble is, Sam’s hated the cold ever since the Cage. Time for Dean to step up and look after him.
Wake by minchout:
Gadreel has had Sam for four years, and Dean, lost in guilt and obsessed with finding a way to get his brother back, has isolated himself in a cabin in the Missouri Ozarks with nothing but the woods, a stray dog, some chickens, and all the books the Men of Letters had to offer to keep him company. Then Sam shows up one day without his passenger, and Dean learns quickly that it doesn't matter that Sam is with him again - there is still a lot of work to be done before they can find their way back to each other.
Wanting to Forget by morganaDW (morgana07):
1-shot. S1 fic. After getting Sam freed from the Benders Dean thinks all he has to cope with is some bruises and cuts. He learns quickly just how wrong he is when Sam wakes up with a nightmare, reliving his brief but bad captivity in every detail. Sam just wants to forget & Dean has to try to get him to let him help. Will one night of cruelty and pain ruin what’s been formed between them?
CW: referenced past rape/noncon
when I wake up I'm afraid, somebody else might take my place by quake_quiver:
Sam doesn’t remember the last time he cried for Dean like he did that night. And now it’s been…two weeks. Maybe more. Sam is tired, and in pain, and starting to doubt that Dean’s going to show up. He’s weak and shaking from a combination of constant pain and hunger. Sam longs for Dean. Dean would make it better. Dean would fix it.
CW: rape/noncon, body horror
Wire Inside Me by merle_p:
There are a lot of things Sam hates about his current condition, to the point where he sometimes feels for the gun under his pillow at night, blindly toys with the safety, imagines pressing the muzzle into the underside of his chin and pulling the trigger just to make it stop. But there’s nothing he hates as much as the shadows he sees in Dean’s eyes whenever his brother is looking at him these days. It’s not an expression he remembers ever seeing before, but Sam thinks it’s probably something like revulsion. Horror. Disgust. What else could it be.
CW: referenced past rape/noncon, body horror, forced pregnancy
Worth (and its companion fic Ruin You) by Mumble_Bee:
Episode 10x01 "Black" where Dean is a human, and very, very, pissed off to hear someone has hands on his brother. “It’s nothing personal,” Cole whispered into Sam's ear, too quietly for Dean to hear, “but I need to kill your brother, and I need him off his game when he gets here. I don’t wanna hurt you, kid, but I’m going to, anyway. I’m going to hurt you a lot."
CW: explicit rape/noncon
you'll never see us again by according2thelore:
Then finally, his eyes trail over to Dean. His pupils are pin-point thin, and his hair is straggling in his face so Dean can’t see most of what expression lies there. Sam usually wakes up from nightmares in one of three attitudes: confusion, fear, or calm. A scary, sense-prickling calm that Dean hates more than anything else. Resignation, almost. Or: Sam suffers from nightmares and touch starvation post-Cage. They do their best to deal.
other Sam/Lucifer noncon
Cage Fight (No Way To Do This Right) by Dyed_Red:
Sam’s visit to the cage is already going awry, but Dean’s one-man rescue ends up skidding it sideways into territory neither him or Sam are ready for. (Gratuitous episode scene re-write. If Cas hadn’t come till after, if he hadn’t been there yet when Dean ran down to the 'parole' cage after hearing Sam scream - how bad could it have got for the brothers before he made it?)
CW: graphic rape/noncon
Into Being by withthekeyisking:
When Sam wakes up in the cave on Apocalypse World after having been killed by vamps, it's not just to find Lucifer there with him. It's to find him in him.
CW: graphic rape/noncon, necrophilia, forced pregnancy
Reggie/Tim/Sam noncon
a pointless resistance for you by withthekeyisking:
Sam doesn't know how long he's been with Tim and Reggie by the time Dean shows up and tries to take him out of there. Long enough that's he's already lost one baby and is pregnant with the next. Long enough that this life is starting to feel like all he knows.
CW: graphic rape/noncon, forced pregnancy & miscarriage, victim blaming
screaming birds sound an awful lot like singing by withthekeyisking:
Sam has done his best to move past what Tim and Reggie did to him, pretending it never happened at all. But running into them again makes that very difficult—especially when Dean gets involved.
CW: referenced past rape/noncon
Waste 'Em All by withthekeyisking:
When Tim and Reggie try to force the demon blood down Sam's throat, he spits it back out. He has no interest in being turned into their own personal attack dog. They don't...take it well.
CW: explicit rape/noncon
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lupinus-bicolor · 3 days
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check out my meat shrine on neocities!!!!
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⚠️⚠️ HEAVY WARNINGS FOR GORE, GUTS, VISCERA, ANATOMICAL MODELS, FLASHING IMAGES, AND REFERENCES TO DEATH⚠️⚠️
a little shrine for my favorite form of memento mori, the uncomfortable truth that we are all meatbags sloshing through life <3
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llitchilitchi · 3 days
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sometimes I wish this site had a mute option
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kthvlr · 17 hours
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⋆౨ৎ SMUT HEADCANONS - kth ᝰ.ᐟ
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— . ݁₊ ✉️ ⊹ . ݁ ˖ —
summary: taehyung smut headcanons
notes: i said “he loves when” way too many times in this just ignore that thanks!
word count: 1.1k
genre: smut
pairing: taehyung x reader
warnings/tags: NSFW!
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- i know he talks you through it.
- “let go for me”
- “i’ve got you”
- “i can’t” “yes you can”
- the type to hold your hand during sex
- he moans right next to your ear
- and his moans are low
- but when he gets close they get whiny, breathy, and loud
- puts his long fingers to good use
- gets really sleepy after sex
- favourite position is missionary because he loves being able to see you and being able to be close to you
- also he’s just a romantic guy
- sometimes he’ll have your legs over his shoulders if he wants to feel even closer to you
- he also loves when you ride him
- he just loves watching how you start to get desperate as you get closer to release, ignoring the ache in your legs. he loves when you use his shoulders or chest for support, or when you rest you head on his shoulders as you continue to ride him because you’re so tired but it feels too good to stop, all while panting and moaning next to his ear
- or if you’re in control, he’ll lose his fucking mind. head thrown back, mouth parted, hair messy, and moans getting louder and more whiny. he loves when you run your hands through his hair and kiss his neck and jaw. he loves how you look at him, all while rolling your hips in just the right way. he just loves how you make him feel
- and when you’re riding him, he’ll either have his hands on your hips guiding you, on your thighs, on your waist, or on your breasts
- lowkey into giving hickeys where no one else can see them
- but he knows that they’re there and that’s enough
- sometimes your shirt with lift up when you reach for something and he’ll catch a glimpse of a hickey that he left on your hip and he loves it
- he loves to fuck you slow and deep after a long day
- you’ll both be tired and lazy but needy at the same time
- he just loves sleepy sex
- he also loves eating you out
- like.. lowkey obsessed with eating you out
- it’s come to a point where you could be doing anything and next thing you know he’s between your thighs
- you could be on your phone, watching tv, reading, cuddling, the list goes on. there’s a chance he’ll end up asking to eat you out
- he’s a switch
- slightly dom leaning
- i just feel like he wouldn’t be shy about letting you take control some of the time
- like… not shy AT ALL
- whenever he speaks he whispers in your ear
- and depending on the mood he’ll either whisper sweet things about how much he loves you or he’ll be telling you how good you feel around him
- i feel like a lot of people might disagree but personally… i don’t think he’s that kinky…
- i think he’s willing to experiment and is open to suggestions, and if you’re into something/want to try something i think he’ll almost always be down to at least try, rather than him having a bunch of kinks
- he himself doesn’t strike me as the really kinky type
- however
- he lowkey has praise kink
- his love language is literally words of affirmation and it shows
- anytime you tell him how much you love him, how good he makes you feel, how no one could ever be as good as he is, he’s a mess within seconds
- and he also praises you too
- “you feel so good”
- “you’re taking it so well”
- “you’re perfect”
- also is into edging
- both giving and receiving
- he just loves seeing you desperate for him and as much as he won’t admit it, he loves to experience that desperation too
- oh and he loooves when you tug his hair
- or even if your hand is just in his hair
- he loves it
- if you two are cuddling sometimes he’ll just start kissing your neck while you’re doing whatever you’re doing
- like not just little pecks i mean proper kisses
- and he doesn’t have any reason to do it. it’s not even that he wants anything from you
- sometimes it escalates into something more, sometimes it doesn’t, but he enjoys it either way
- he never talks about what you two do in bed to his friends
- he keeps your sex life very private
- he’s very attentive
- if you’re uncomfortable or in pain he’ll notice immediately and will stop to ask if you’re okay
- because he gets so sleepy after sex, aftercare can vary depending on how much energy he had that day
- he tries to at least clean you up every time
- but as soon as he’s beside you in bed again he’s out
- or on days were he has a bit more stamina, he’ll stay up with you for a bit, talking with you, kissing you, cuddling you, tracing patterns on your bare skin, massaging your sore thighs
- but it won’t take too long for him to fall asleep again
- loses his mind when you jerk/suck him off
- ^^he will not be able to control his moans at all
- loves watching you fall apart on his fingers before he fucks you properly
- very into eye contact
- something about him wearing a necklace and it dangling and bouncing off his chest when he fucks you omg.
- wants to hear your moans
- not only does he love them and the way they make him feel, but he needs to know that you feel good. he needs feedback i guess?
- doesn’t like to masturbate
- ^^your hands/mouth/pussy feel better (his words)
- will wake you up to fuck you
- it will be the middle of the night and then you hear him whispering and whining you name into your ear about how much he needs you right now
- even if you’re not able to do too much because of how tired you both are
- ^^and when that is the case he’ll just fuck you slow while spooning you
- when he gets back home too late or isn’t at home a lot because of his busy schedule, he will make it up to you
- he’ll start by telling you how sorry he is that he’s been busy and that it’s been so long since he’s been able to spend time with you
- sometimes it’s a thoughtful gift, date night in, a movie night, maybe he’ll (try to) cook dinner. or even just spending the day together is enough, with the two of you just happy to be in each others company
- regardless, it will end in him fucking you slow and deep, making sure you know just how much he’s missed you
✉️
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𐙚 show some love to my other works!: masterlist
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anundyingfidelity · 2 days
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I'M A RUIN — Soldier Boy/Ben (Part IV)
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Series summary: After the events of the Seven Tower, you present Grace Mallory a new secret project you're working on already to develop a cure to Compound V. The only problem? You need Soldier Boy for that.
Pairing: Soldier Boy/Ben x female reader.
Word count: 2.8k.
Warnings for series: set after S3 (spoilers), some OOC!Ben, some depressed!Ben, angst, hurt/comfort, eventual smut, slow-burn, language, PTSD, reader has Compound V (she's no Vought supe tho), Soldier Boy being an usual asshole, reader is a fucking liar.
Warnings on this chapter: Reader's parents are fucking irresponsible and disgusting people, mentions of a dead parent, Homelander!!!! (he's a fucking warning), sexual assault (touching, kissing, etc.) and some after thoughts, you know the usual questionable stuff on TB universe, Ben's point of view and presence=red flag.
Notes: more about reader's past in here! And just want to add that this is how i imagine her suit on this chapter. I'm also using a lot of inspo from Sue Storm of the Fantastic Four because I love her, so yeah. And thanks so much for reading it means a lot to me! ^^
this fic tags: @k-slla @syrma-sensei @mostlymarvelgirl @cheynovak @drasticemotions @blacknoirr @deans-spinster-witch
Part I | Part II | Part III | Part IV
GEN MASTERLIST!
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Part IV: Countdown
2009
"Spectrum, turn around, please," the lady on the other side of the camera ordered.
You did as she told, turning slowly and showing a complete view of your suit. Made of unstable molecules, the suit was your best creation at the time. It was all white with black details, and finally you had something covering your whole body that'd turn invisible when you commanded. Your boots were the same, specially built to disappear and blend with your powers when needed.
"Great, show us what you can do," the woman said.
You nodded, your heart beating so hard on your chest. You didn't want to fuck it up. Not for your mother. She was the main reason why you were there in the first place. You took a deep breath, with eyes closed you raised your palms at your chest level and created a force field around your figure. The force fields you learnt to make over the years of self training were like gigantic bubbles that allowed you to float around if you said so, and they protected you or anyone or anything they were covering.
The camera, the couch, the table, and any single thing you found in the room were now surrounded by the fields, lifting them up a couple of feet from the surface. And once you thought it was enough, they landed slowly on their place, the fields vanished just like the one around yourself. Though the lady on the other side didn't seem amused or surprised.
"I also turn invisible," you said for the first time after your personal presentation was over.
"Go on," she plainly answered.
And within seconds, you slowly disappeared from her sight. The fabric of the suit faded away.
"I created this special costume to turn invisible without, you know, being naked," you commented.
Still, there was no clear answer on the face of the woman. She was just busy taking notes and filming your audition with the steady camera on the table. She said nothing, her eyes glued to her writing. Disappointed, you made yourself visible again.
"That's impressive!"
You gasped. It was that voice you heard so many times on TV. His steps came closer and he stopped by your side with a smile on his face.
"Homelander," the woman called with a wide, fake grin. "You weren't supposed to be in here."
"Just passing by, wanted to say hi. I'm really amazed by you, darling."
You tried to smile the best you could. But you were so tense and flustered now that he was in front of you. Your childhood hero, coming to see you at your audition. Even before you got a clear response from Vought. It felt like a dream. Any child had dreamt of it at some point.
You grew up with him and the Seven. He was one of the reasons you forgot every single problem and responsibility your dysfunctional, selfish family put you through from a young age. To them, you were just a doll to play with and show off. The perfect daughter. But seeing the Seven was totally different. You wanted to be like them. Too sad this part was also linked to your mother and her self-centered shit. If only...
"Thank you," you barely answered with a soft voice, looking down on your boots.
"I've been out there, hesitating if I should come in, since you created those force fields. Wow!" he praised, making you chuckle. "You left the door open on purpose, didn't you two?"
All you could do was chuckle again, you felt your cheeks burning at his banter. He smiled along with you before turning his eyes to the lady.
"Hey, Greta. Can you leave us alone for a moment?"
"But I have to-"
Homelander chuckled, cutting her words. "Absolutely no, I can continue for you. Remember?"
Greta, as he called her, swallowed thickly and her eyes switched between you and the supe. "Sure, sir."
She lifted herself up from the chair, took her things and went out. You noticed the camera was still in place, that meant it was still rolling.
Once the door closed. "So..." he began, walking a circle around you. "How'd you create this... costume of yours?"
"Well, I like science," you nervously smiled, playing with your glove-covered hands. He passed by your face this time and paced around one more time. "It took me a while to figure out how but I did something with the molecules, created my own patent of the matter and did this complete costume."
Homelander stopped at your back. He hummed. "Smart. Tell me..."
His pause made you answer what he was looking for. "Spectrum."
"Spectrum, why do you want to be part of the Seven so bad?"
Homelander dragged your alias with a dark voice, one that replaced the long warm and welcoming tone he had with you at first. You licked your lips, anxious and out of words. Once behind your figure, he angled himself so close to one of your ears that you felt his hot breath on your skin.
"So? I know you have something to say, dear."
"I- I just want to help others... Do what you guys do..."
The next thing you felt was the supe's strong body pressing on your ass. You gasped loudly as his hands grabbed the sides of your hips forcing you to fall back against his chest.
"Go on," Homelander whispered.
One of his hands roamed over your stomach slowly, right under your breasts, and you were absolutely caged on his grip. You took deep breaths, closing your eyes as he touched you over the suit.
"I- I know science, I told you. Also I can help the team w-with new inventions of my own... Create technology t-to fight very bad threats," you stuttered.
"Mmmh, yeah, I like the sound of that," Homelander chuckled against your neck, his lips tracing soft and unwanted kisses on your skin.
"Please- ah!"
He harshly pushed you against his groin. Your breath caught in your throat at the feel of his crotch. This wasn't what you thought it was. This was not what your mother signed you up for.
"Tell me, did your father know how much of a fucking slut you are?" Homelander hissed, his hand cupping your covered breast.
Something inside you emerged at his question. His touch was disgusting and it was making you sick and the mention of your father, your dead father, made it even worse.
"What do you know about him?" you asked in a dark whisper, still planning your next move.
Deep inside, you were scared of Homelander, it was a new face he had yet to show to the world.
"Just the basics, honey," he said plainly, forcing you to walk with a grip on your arm. The supe sat on the couch and pushed you to his lap. "He was quite the rich man, Edgar knew you'd be a great deal to the company, well, your money of course."
You let out a gasp. "What?"
"Honey, he was one of our most valuable shareholders," he playfully answered, his hands cupping your cheeks.
And it clicked. Your mother supported your dream just because she'd still be getting profits from Vought. The firm was now under her name, and she needed something more to strengthen the relationship between Vought and your father's inheritance. The fucking witch. And then, your father. He was the one financing this piece of shit sitting between your legs. Were all supes like this behind their masks? If so, fucking crap. Everything you believed in was bullshit. A circus. And they clowned you so well. And above all, the sickening man that had been touching you without your permission the past endless minutes...
"Oh, poor thing, you didn't know," Homelander's intense blue eyes widened when he immediately noticed your confused, blank face.
Your eyes filled with tears and still, you refused to cry in front of the asshole you once admired.
"Don't worry, I'll take care of you here with us," he smirked. His fingers on your neck, feeling your pulse. You closed your eyes so hard, your nose wrinkled and you held back a sob when his hand added pressure around your collar. He leaned closer, his lips finding yours in a sloppy kiss as you tried to resist his touch. "So fucking useful," Homelander whispered against your lips. He gave you that mischievous grin of his. You shivered. "I can't wait to ruin you. Every single inch of you."
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The same past memory of Homelander haunted you the next day. The way you found out about your father's business with Vought and how the supes showed their real faces was the main reason you were here now.
You remembered you had to hit Homelander as hard as you could to escape from him and use your force field to protect yourself before running away and leaving the tower, fully invisible. Not that it was a great help since Homelander had a lot of abilities with his vision, and he could hear the beating of your heart miles away, but for you, it was worth the try. It was a surprise he didn't follow you that day. Instead, Vought got a new deal with your mother for the budget and you hated that. You cut all communication with what was left of your family after that day, knowing it could've been so much worse.
Homelander and Vought, however, were after you now. And he was a difficult face to forget. Not only because he was faking everything from the public but because Vought was after your father's money. And deciding to step away from all the illegal stuff they did, you left for college. Science was always a part of you and it's what got you here, under Grace Mallory and the CIA, doing different jobs you were not so proud of, but now, you were looking for a cure. It was all that mattered those days, until you found out that your mother had been experimented on during her pregnancy. A fucking lie. That's what your life was. That's why she cheered you to go to that stupid audition and fell into the hands of that monster at twenty-three years old.
The thought of your father supporting the horrid things Vought and the Seven did for decades was unbearable, and since Homelander's visit the night before caused those memories and nightmares to be back. It took a great effort to get out of bed and come to work that day. You'd make sure to compensate yourself for it later. But now, you were in a hurry to your daily session with Soldier Boy. You saved your phone in the pocket of your trousers after checking the time as you walked down the aisle, grabbing tightly the report of your patient with your other hand. Well, thirty minutes late wasn't nothing.
"Doctor!" you heard a female voice running towards you in the halls that made you turn on your heels. It was your young assistant.
"Hey, Bianca. What's wrong?" you asked as you noticed she was a little out of breath.
"We ran another test. The supe survived," she blurted, handing you a tablet that you didn't take. Sometimes the change in the results was minimal.
"That's great. Any significant improvements?"
"Well, just minimal effects. Right now some fever, fatigue, dehydration, and uhm, low pulse."
You sighed after another illusion. "Right. I don't think those are minimal effects, Bianca. Please check our patient and see how the powers are working. Run blood tests, all tests you can and then you can provide me the results. I'm a little busy right now."
She nodded with a shy smile, looking around subtly. "Sure."
You smiled back as best as you could. "Anything else?"
"No, it's just- I see you go this way a lot," Bianca pointed to the direction you were heading with her gaze. "That's Soldier Boy, isn't he?"
Your brows furrowed. "Why you ask?"
"Nothing, well, my grandpa used to talk about him all the time," she giggled. "I was just curious, sorry."
"No problem. I get it. But I really have to go, please make sure those results are on my desk by the end of the day," you ordered kindly.
"I will."
"Thanks, Bianca."
With that, you gave a last smile and began your walk again away from her, slower than before. For some reason something was off since you entered the building. It felt different. Totally weird. For the record, since Homelander threatened to have your head off, you paid twice the attention to your surroundings and the people around. You didn't know if there was something big planning right now in front of your nose. You just walked a couple of feet when you felt someone following behind, that was probably watching over you. In a swift movement, you turned on your heels but no one was there. The aisle was empty.
Bianca was already gone and almost no one would wander on this wing of the building, for obvious reasons. With caution you resumed your steps, telling yourself that you were not going insane.
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"Robert Singer and I have been hard at work bridging the divide between the human and Superhuman communities. I've seen that divide firsthand in my three years running the FBSA—"
Ben scoffed, taking the TV controller to turn the screen off. "Bullshit."
He stood in the middle of the room with nothing but a towel hanging down his hips after taking a shower, taking the last smoke of his blunt. He grew tired of waiting for you, so he just took a shower and now, everything on the fucking channels was the stupid campaign by Victoria Neuman being supported by Vought and the fucking brat he was supposed to call his son.
With a deep breath, he finished the weed and threw the remains on the ashtray over the new coffee table. His mind started to wander away, realizing he had been a little calm the last couple of days after he almost blew up the fucking place to the ground. Inside, Ben knew your words and actions were a lot of help for the small sense of serenity that started to grow within his chest after that moment. Absolutely that was something he wouldn't admit, ever. But if he was to say, he was actually relieved.
Taking a look around, his place was not that big of a mess. You were certainly used to his clothes around the floor and the sofas, so it wasn't really important. What he found annoying though was you pushing him to read the stupid books and write down his feelings. He wasn't going to do that. If you were there to medicate him, so be it. He wondered why you took so long to do it. Probably he should be stoned enough to not feel anything. That was fucking better.
Just as he started to go over his mental plan to get the hell out of your prison, the door opened. He smirked at your sight. As always, an useless armed man standing behind your figure. You dispatched the guard and stepped inside Soldier Boy's place, the door closing with a loud sound.
You stopped your tracks just a few steps away from him. He noticed your eyes tracing his half bare body in a quick motion, before turning to his face with an arrogant smirk on your lips.
"See something you like, sweetheart?" Ben teased.
With a light chuckle, you held your head high. "Don't be delusional, it's just basic instinct."
"Believe me, I fucking know that," he snarked, taking over your figure with his green eyes the same way you did before. "Basic instinct."
You rolled your eyes. "So," you sat down in your usual place to start the session, making a pile of three of his shirts in the empty space. "Make yourself decent and then we can continue."
Ben took some sweatpants and a shirt from the floor and started to dress himself in front of you, without much care. He smirked as you turned away your gaze to focus on the report lying on your lap.
"You're late," he remarked, taking his own seat once he was done with his clothes.
"Yeah, I had some things to do," you mumbled going through the pages. "But I see we can start now."
He took a deep breath, staring into the distance. "Don't make it boring."
You grimaced, looking back at him. "Can't promise that."
Ben sensed a playfulness coming from you. Could it be that, after recieving your comforting words, he was seeing another side of you? Like the side that would actually trust him, because you still arrived. You were sitting in front of him. You were with him, in the same fucking room where the sun was far from getting. Yeah, you were there but he was too full of ego to bring his walls down again. He wanted to convince himself he wasn't vulnerable. He knew he was more than that. He was Soldier Boy, the man who had to stop Homelander and his fucking kid.
He smirked. "Well, sugar, I can ask you to try."
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zzzzzestforlife · 3 days
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life lately // enjoying myself so hard it's getting dangerous 🤭
in this issue 🔍: brain-rot target language input 🇯🇵🇨🇳🇰🇷 & if icarus was a workaholic 👩‍💻✍️🍝
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"language learning" but it's just brain-rot 🧠
🇯🇵 Shogun (9/10) — objectively a really good show, but a lot of death and triggering topics for me personally 🥺
🇯🇵 Spy x Family (5/10) — i can only watch one episode at a time now because the plot is getting increasingly ridiculous, please don't be mad at me if you're a fan 😅
🇨🇳 When I Fly Towards You (6/10) — it's silly, but it's also just what you expect from kids of the characters' ages and at times it does tickle that part of my brain that likes candy (i still like Exclusive Fairytale better though, 对不起 张陆让)
🇯🇵 Petrichor 花鋏 キョウ (10/10) — my new favorite album!! ☺️ even @pianistbynight likes this one and she usually prefers classical music!
🇰🇷 Seventeen on Shuffle (10/10) — my usual suspects never miss 😌
too close to the sun but finally looking in the mirror ☀️🪞
i gave myself a headache from working too much in poor physical conditions again 😭 i didn't notice until the end of the day because i was on a roll at work and it's rare when that happens, so in a messed up way, i feel it was worth it?? i bought a new chair and rearranged my desk setup a little to be more ergonomic, but that only does so much when i have one good night of sleep a week 🙃
my poor sleep is low-key my own fault though since i write and binge cinema therapy videos late into the night because i love doing those things so much that my brain won't shut up until i do them 😛
in other news, i made my favorite pasta recipe!! 😋 but i burned myself and didn't notice until i started washing the dishes in hot water ♨️ wow, me enjoying myself so much i don't notice i'm hurting myself is a real theme here... 🙈 something to work out in detail in my diary some time 🤔
💌: how's life been treating you lately? 💐
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bonus: @pianistbynight tagged me in this fun picrew game (how you look now vs when you were younger) and it made me miss my good eyesight 🥲 everyone, take good care of your eyes by taking lots of outdoor breaks (with UV protection!!) 👀
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💞: @shoosiopao @tea-tuesday @tokidokitokyo @ink-stained-clouds @ilonar0 @cravingstudyvalidation @getbreaded @nelyastudies @roxysbbg @cinammon-buns and anyone else who made it to the bottom of this post 😉
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nenilein · 2 days
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Hello! Apologies for sending an ask out of the blue but considering your familiarity with localisation differences in persona 4/golden, I was wondering if anything comes to your mind regarding this aspect and how the game depicts queerness and queer themes? Thank you!
Heya! Don't worry, I was thinking people would probably ask stuff like this. After all, I already replied to somebody's tags asking this same thing previously, but I know not many people saw that, so let me use the chance to go into more detail:
Unfortunately, Persona 4's treatment of queer themes is not a result of the translation. The only things that were down to translation choices were small things, such as which pronouns are used in which situation (because Japanese does not at all have the same concept of third person pronouns as English, and the way first person classifiers that mean "I" work is very complex and a lot more vibes-based than actually tied to gender.)
But for the most part, everything is pretty much the same. Kanji's reaction to Chie mumbling about something being "off" about how he interacted with Naoto that first time, the tent scene, Yosuke's extreme insecurity in his own sexuality in addition to everyone else's... I think maybe the only thing that's a biiit better in Japanese is that Teddie is kiiinda genderfluid in Japanese, with the artbook outright stating that he doesn't necessarily consider himself "male" when he's in his bear form, unless it's necessary for a joke.
A lot of this can be traced to the really odd relationship the game's director, Katsura Hashino, has to queer themes. In interviews about Catherine Fullbody (a game which infamously has a rather weirdly handled gay romance route which, however, is notably also the only romance route in the game that cannot possibly result in a bad ending), he talks about how he's always admired queer people for being "strong" and wanted to write queer stories, but couldn't really do it until Fullbody because Atlus higher ups were afraid of backlash from the fans.
Traces of this are actually seen in Persona 4 Vanilla's data, where remnants of a surprisingly well done romance route for YOSUKE, of all people, are still present. That route made it far enough into development to have voiced lines in both, English and Japanese. However, it was dummied out in the final game and its script content was removed. Yosuke STILL has the "girlfriend flag" in the code that all the female romance options also have, but in the finished game it only checks whether you can hug him during his social link or not. Everything else was dummied out. You can still find the voice files on the cutting room floor if you want:
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And yes, the "I like you" line is unambiguously romantic in Japanese. His wording is very hard to misinterpret.
However, in the finished game and the rest of the franchise Yosuke's bisexuality was reduced to an in-joke of the developers. It's most poignant in Persona Q (the first one), where if you get the "marriage" scene with Yosuke in the second dungeon, his reactions differ WILDLY depending on which Protagonist you are playing as, far more than other male characters. With Makoto Yuki he acts nonchallant and deadpan about it. With Yu Narukami he acts like a blushy Tsundere and panics constantly. So, yeah.
Okay, so, if the director had interest in writing queer stories since before Persona 4, why is Persona 4 the way it is then?
Well, because - and there's no way around it - he sucks at it.
Katsura Hashino has to be one of the clumsiest "gay activists" I've ever seen in my whole darn life. He finds queer people "cool", but seemingly never had any queer writers or sensitivity readers on his teams and it's caused enormous blunders in how these themes have been handled. For example, when after Persona 3 it was pointed out to him that the writing of the female characters in interaction with the male characters was bad, he immediately hired more female writers and gave them free reign for how to handle the female characters from then on out. But apparently the same thing never happened with his mishandling of queer themes. He wants Catherine's Erica and Rin to be empowering figures for trans women and gay men, but makes a lot of blunders in how he has other characters interact with them to the point it buries his good intentions. Erica's boyfriend having gay panic upon realizing she's trans is treated as "funny and cute", even by Erica herself. Rin technically being a monogender alien really undermines his story of becoming more secure in his sexuality. It goes on and on like that.
The intention with Naoto's story was to point out the extreme sexism in Japanese society and how it forces female nerds to find alternate modes of self-expression, but the clumsy choice of including surgery themes in Naoto's dungeon completely buried that for especially western queer audiences. Most people don't even remember Naoto's dungeon was outright modeled after a Kamen Rider villain hideout. They completely shot themselves in the foot with this one. Additionally, the way Naoto is handled AFTER the dungeon makes her (I'm using that pronoun because she calls herself a "woman" in Japanese in the game) seem more like someone who's on the verge of discovering they are X-gender (the japanese word for "nonbinary") than a repressed girl. Like, right down to how she has Rise help her experiment with clothes in the canonical drama CDs only to realize she really is uncomfortable with skirts and go for an androgynous but less restrictive look going forward. The way she dresses in the Golden epilogue and P4D is pretty X-gender core if you ask me. If they had leaned into that they could have genuinely have had something AMAZING, while also presenting the themes of sexism they wanted to explore, but the lack of queer sensitivity readers kind of ruined it.
Same for Kanji. The way they write him makes it seem like he's bisexual or pansexual, rather than straight, but they kinda shove that part of him aside after his dungeon is done, leaving his actual orientation up in the air and wasting a really good chance for representation. NOW, given what happened to Yosuke's social link, it's quite possible the original intent WAS to explore this more and it got cut, but as it stands, we'll never know. The huge problem of the internalized toxic stereotypes his Shadow presented never being reflected on and put into their right context in the rest of the game, when his social link could've given a great opportunity for that is also a huge shame.
All of this happened because of Atlus being unwilling to let their writers go all out with queer themes in fears of alienating a cishet audience AND because Hashino never sat his writing team down with any actual queer writers to sort this shit out and learn how to get across what the team was ACTUALLY trying to say. Now, given, Persona 4 was far from the only Japanese media property with that exact issue at the time, but it hurts especially much in its case because of the game's themes of exploring the truth to its logical conclusion, as well as psychology. These are issues that a remake REALLY would do well to address and correct. I feel like they actually will HAVE to do that, because sensitivity readers have become the NORM in handling these themes now in Japanese media, rather than the exception. You can thank trail blazing mainstream works like Zombie Land Saga for that.
All in all, Persona 4's handling of queer themes is an exercise in frustration that I hope is corrected soon.
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