#lots to unpack for everyone this ep

[thurio-edau]

SBG GANG MENTAL ANALYSIS

yup, him for part two. funny thing despite Aiden being my favourite character I'm most excited for the other three posts I'll make, especially the last one. there's a lot to unpack here so

also im writing this with a migraine pls read it-

Part 2: Aiden Clark

ah, yes. the obviously-mentally-ill from the start fan favourite Aiden Clark. let's go.

first, I want to start with something I find really important about his character, what makes him heavily mischaracterized in the fandom. the 'psychopath' cliche.

the terms 'psychopath', 'insane' and 'unstable' are often confused with each other due to media stereotypes, such as Aiden here. one, he is not a psychopath. psychopath literally means a self-centered person who lacks sympathy, affection and care; making them far from most other characters in their franchise. their lack of sympathy/empathy often makes them criminalized, here

disturbing content warning, for an example of a psychopath.

let's take Gressil from Homesick for example since a lot of SBG readers also read Homesick. so, here, Gressil is a perfect example of an actual psychopath. his lack of empathy makes him torment others, he's very self-centered. and when asked why he's doing this? he says he was bored. let's look at Aiden here. what does Aiden do when bored? probably dumb ideas or annoy Tyler. not torturing people for fun. Aiden is just a boy who likes thrills, but he has a sense of empathy, care and justice.

you wanna see a psychopathic Aiden?? the canvas is it

(our local Logan hater is publishing the canvas eps go checc beachy out)

but that's him, not our Aiden. canvas does not equal originals y'all

alright, now since we got that cleared out!! firstly, ADHD.

I think everyone in the fandom is already aware that Aiden is ADHD but I'm still going to talk about it just like Ashlyn's autism. Red has also said that she wrote Aiden with ADHD in mind but hadn't canonically confirmed anyone as neurodivergent. let's start with the main symptoms of ADHD, also known as Attention Decifit and Hyperactivity Disorder.

I know about 5 different ADHD people myself and did some research, it probably won't be extremely accurate since I'm not ADHD myself, but I'll try to do whatever I can. first with the AD part, Attention Decifit.

now as seen, he doesn't exactly have any problems with theorizing itself. but the problem is that his attention just goes away easily.

i mean cmon bro was making memes on the job

he tries to do work, but can't. he has a low attention span which makes him not able to concentrate. he can't keep it up for long, he'll get distracted or bored too easily about things that doesn't interest in specially.

it's just distracting. what his attention is on constantly changes, there's more to that after the ADHD part but we're here for now.

the hyperactivity... it's a lot more apparent. but I should explain the insane-unstable thing before that.

insane means that someone's mental health is not in an okay situation, where it prevents the person from thinking normally, acting rationally, very often found together with delusions. the person is seriously mentally ill where it might count as a disability.

unstable, however, where someone is prone to psychiatric problems, has moodswings etc. they're not exactly the most sane person, but they aren't insane either. Aiden here, obviously falls on the unstable side. maybe just a little bit insane if you squint. this will be brought up later too, but it mixed well with his hyperactivity too.

and as we all know, our boy isn't exactly the most stable person. (sorry for the collages, but since there is a tumblr picture limit i have to keep on collaging. yes i learnt from the last time) his hyperactivity mixes with his unstable mindset which makes him incresingly vulnerable to danger- which he likes. from when the first shift happened, he's been really careless about stuff but it's been all about his love for thrill.

and it irritates Tyler, too.

the main subplot about his character is that he's a person of excitement. guess what? ADHD people like the excitement, they like new things, they like the adrenaline and thrill. now, Aiden's main characteristic of being unstable mixed with ADHD makes him an even more reckless person. another thing mixing with the hyperactivity, is boundaries.

this part will mostly be about Ashlyn since the boundary issue only happens with her.

I talked about this on Ashlyn's side on my Ashlyn analysis, now it's time for Aiden's side.

he's really annoying to her at first. Ashlyn is someone with lots of boundaries, like high walls. and who tries to climb them with his dumbass? Aiden of course.

she kept rejecting his efforts to befriend her for some time, until the night they stole the jeep. then she managed to actually bring the walls down, and accept them all into her life. but damn was she blunt.

felt that honestly

and Aiden understands her that night, too.

Ashlyn was hesistant to hug him, yes, he was aware. but she still did which made him realize she was also trying. i have to tell you, people with ADHD and people with autism either have trouble getting along, or go perfectly well. my ADHD sibling for example, I have to push them away for a lot and tell them to lower their voice. but once they remember my boundaries it actually becomes a normal, even pleasant hangout. which, Aiden realizes and tries to get along with. he tries.

seeing his efforts on her boundaries makes something click in her mind. and she starts to be a lot nicer when they hang out in the arcade.

Aiden eventually learns and remembers what she's like and what she loves to do. he already tried to watch her ballet sessions once -got slammed-, he's been to her room where he remembered the mat from and her fighting makes it obvious. I'm sure he knew he'd get cooked by betting that. but he still did,

because he knew it'd interest her. which he succeeded, he saw her smile again. the arcade day went great until Barron and his gang pulled up, but if we ignore that part it all went well. Aiden started to understand and respect her boundaries.

anyways then Tyler fucking dies

he knows that Ashlyn feels guilty. Aiden wants to comfort her through it, but also do it correctly. without going over any boundaries. which makes him really,

really,

really surprised when she responds.

also including this pannel cause its hilarious

here we see that he's still trying. hell, I'm sure he spent minutes thinking if he should come close physically to help her. that's probably why he just nudged her softly before anything else. he's not used to it, he has to conciously make an effort to not cross said boundaries. keeping his voice lower, try to not be so reckless, not doing anything physically close unless she reciprocates. wow how i wish another someone i knew irl tried that hard instead of blaming it on me cOUGH COUGH COUGH

also other small things to include

he's yapping a lot

he has a comically large amount of puzzles in his backpack for one single trip

and sticks his head into lamps for some reason

but that's just Aiden and his little neurodivergent brain for ya.

now the part I wanted to get to the most.

Borderline Personality Disorder.

first, what is Borderline Personality Disorder?

shortened as BPD, borderline is when someone's mood is inconsistent and swinging. think of it's name; the person's mental state is in the border, in the border line, switching up fastly. the most easily understood and common type is when the person goes from a depression to a happy state. but no matter which state they are in and/or go to, one thing stays the same: it is unstable.

one thing about borderline is that it is frequently mixed with bipolar. however bipolar is a neurodivengercy which means it is what someone is born with and cannot be changed. but borderline is obtained later in life. it usually happens with depression. bipolar is much more random and the episodes last longer in comparison. it may last up to hours, and the person's memory might have trouble remembering their episodes. borderline, on the other hand, is a short-lived mood swing.

now here. here's the catch; people with BPD during mood swings can have reckless behaviour, suicidal thoughts -in his case as far as we know, lowered sense of protecting himself- or a loss of understanding danger. sounds familiar?

borderline's recklessness and dangerousness, sometimes self-destructive acts combines with ADHD's love for thrill and excitement, combined with Aiden's own personality all make up for a great condition of instability.

Aiden's behaviour constantly goes crazy, I think his most frequent mood swing might be his normal self (at least, as normal as he could be) to this more maniac way of acting. I noticed it from his eyes, when he's in a more calm-ish normal state his pupils are a bit more dilated. in the pictures above, you can clearly see that he's still in the episode; filled with the adrenaline, the unstable way of thinking.

but, what causes that? surely a mental illness such as borderline doesn't happen on it's own.

right?

cause it didn't.

it never works that way.

but it can get better.

eventually.

but what happened to him?

personally, as much as a large amounnt of people seems to believe it's something like family abuse I don't think so. maybe neglect, maybe withdrawal, maybe maybe. but we've seen his parents. I don't think they would hurt him like that. I can't put any more pictures, but this is the last part anyway. his parents seem to be kind and gentle, despite that picture in his house. I'm thinking the picture was only for the dramatic effect. his parents said that he used to be really calm and quiet during Lily's birthday, and both Aiden and Ben seem comfortable around them. they were happy taking Ben in too, any kind of abusive parent wouldn't do that at least that's what I believe. also there is that Aiden got serious and concerned when he learnt that their parents were also in the facility, most likely worried for his own as you would have thought.

there was a post that I've been trying to find for like half an hour, I commented on it but I can't find the post now. the person talked about their own theory. if I remember correctly it was that when Aiden was depressive as a child, his parents took him to a thrilling activity like the ones he's been talking about (bungee-jumping, skydiving etc.) and the thrill made him actually get excited. which is why his parents allowed him to go even more reckless, because they are aware of how prone their son could be to the depression.

what happened? let's ignore the parents factor. someone can have a loving family and still be traumatized, someone can be taken care of and still feel abandoned, someone can never have confronted a situation they are terrified of.

one of my theories is that, the loneliness. it must get to a child heavily considering children need to not be left alone, but Aiden was. he didn't have any actual friends since they always moved from one place to another from his parents' business, and they might have not had enough time to make for him (which I believe is bullshitting, every child deserves to be taken some time out for. some people quit their jobs entirely for their child.) and be unaware, and that doesn't change that he was still depressed and alone. his depressive state was seemingly before Ben was taken in. now here one thing with borderline, at least from my experience, is faking actions. smiles, laughs, friendships, conversations... almost as if there's two different lives; one fake, and one real. you keep on switching, you keep on swinging between the sides where you're yourself and where you're just mimicking 'normal human behaviour'.

it starts from faking a happy state during their depression, and by time you're faking it it becomes an automatic adition to your personality. to your mind. once it furthers, it becomes the disorder. Aiden we see is always smiling. it becomes a habit that only breaks sometimes. now, I'm not saying his smile is fake- I think his face is literally just stuck like that. it breaks ever so slightly sometimes. fake it till ya make it yanno? that kind of thing. and when he swings from his calm mood to his borderline-d mood, his pupils get small and his smile gets worse. noticably worse. I'll be rereading the series (AGAIN) and this time look at all the small details since Red loves putting them and I love theorizing so

which, wraps up the Aiden thing! im actually really proud of how i could put my thoughts into text which i never could. i'd love any additions because i love other opinions as well.

and you know what? im glad Ash and Ai are out of the place because the rest are what I'm actually looking forward to >:)

...and i should sleep. really.

(wow sorry yall i finished this hours ago and said 'alright reread to make sure its good before sleep' and fell asleep through it lol sorry for 4 hour delay ig)

(leaving for school rn see yall 8 hours later 🫡)

#sbg #sbgblr #sbg (webtoon) #school bus graveyard #school bus graveyard webtoon #schoolbus graveyard #aiden clark #ashlyn banner #sbg aiden #sbg ashlyn

[bengiyo]

BL 2023 Review

I wasn’t sure how I wanted to write about BL for this year. I was originally going to do a The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly framework for it, but that feels meaner than I actually am about it. Instead, I think I’ll just write out some sections and unpack some things I felt along the way.

I Watched Too Much Again

Last year I engaged with about 92 productions around the world. This year it was 99 (I tracked stuff I completed here). Sure I dropped 18 of them this year, but goddamn. The problem with watching as much as I did this year is that I worked full time this year and also maintained a separate hobby. I also continued my twice-weekly watch sessions with my friend Emily, so there are an additional 100-ish watch sessions in here of rewatching, plus a few other rewatches (Theory of Love and My Ride most notably).

One of my struggles at this point is I’m far too familiar with the genre, and find myself feeling impatient and irritable with shows that aren’t to my taste the way I used to. Throughout the late summer and fall I found myself increasingly grumpier about the genre, and it didn’t get better until I had a holiday and basically slept a day to get some energy back. I also found myself growing apart from fans I’ve known and followed a long time. It’s been a difficult year for me as a long-time fan because my tastes, habits, and friendships in the genre have changed even if the amount I watch hasn’t really.

I Wrote a Lot This Year

I recently converted my watch tag away from my gaming internet persona to just my shortname, so all near-1000 of my Stray Thoughts posts can be found under #ben watches now. I’ve also been going back and adding #ben writes to some of the standalone pieces that I really liked. In reviewing them, the pieces I’m happiest about are my ode to Framboise from Kabe Koji Nekoyashiki-kun Desires to Be Recognized, my post begging everyone to watch La Pluie, my post about what it means to actually like queer men, my SBS ep 10 post that ended up being wrong, my post about the Lavender Scare and Be My Favorite, my Tokyo in April is… post about the breaking of the BL line,

However, the two posts I am most proud of is my half-joking response about why I think tagging each other back and forth across Tumblr in our writing is so important. and The Knowing: Being Queer in BL because I had so much great conversations with folks as a result of both of these posts.

Looking back at my own blog, this is probably the most active I’ve been in my entire time on this website, so thank you to everyone who interacted with me this year, because it really is people talking to me that gets me most inspired to write things down. Big shout out to @lurkingshan who will bug me repeatedly until I blog something that I said in passing.

We Started a Podcast!

After hanging out with @shortpplfedup since Bad Buddy, she got inspired and really wanted to bring something different to the BL podcasting sphere. I had time, and liked talking with her enough, so we started @the-conversation-pod. Now we’re a full year into it and planning out future stuff. It’s been so much fun being able to get things off my soul and break poor NiNi in our recording sessions.

From this year, I think my favorite episodes we did were The Moonlight Chicken Episode, the Eighth Sense episode, the ITSAY Anniversary Episodes,  The Wedding Plan episode, , and The Holiday Clip Show. Huge shout out to @ginnymoonbeam for anchoring the transcription process, and @lurkingshan for editing.

The VIIB Awards will begin airing soontm so look forward to that.

Favorite New Term: Business Gay Performance

Let’s be clear, Bump Up Business is not good. It is an obvious BL cash grab from OnlyOneOf that seeks to comment on the fake nature of BL while doing everything it can to trick the audience into believing that the BL pair is real.

Before we got deeper into this year, I was a big fan of a certain pairing, and then their fans took it too far and it affected the way I engaged with their performances and their work. I like that we have a new term for “fanservice” that communicates that you understand that this is for work. (thanks to NiNi for this comparison) I can look at the latest behind the scenes video from Last Twilight and say that I think Sea really understands the work they’re doing, and he and Jimmy have a very relaxed and mature version of BGP without feeling like I’m feeding into shipping.

Do I think they’re dating? No. Do I like the way they fake it? Absolutely!

I can look at one of @respectthepetty posts about Yin and War having personalized, color-coded mics, and we can talk about the next level BGP between the two and both communicate that we know that this is a performance.

It actually makes the extra PR work fun for me again, because now I can just shout “BGP! BGP! BGP!” and it not feel like I’m giving myself brainrot.

Thai BL Needs to Finish Stronger Next Year

Let’s get into some of the show stuff. This year was defined for me by Thai BL starting strong with good premises and then squandering them by not focusing on the details that mattered or leaning into baseless melodrama. Time for some reads. Some of these shows were generally good, but they failed at these things:

609 Bedtime Story: The world building crumpled in the back half and both endings are flat.

A Boss and a Babe: Cher is a pro gamer who worked for a gaming company and there was no plot point about this at all, or collaboration between the two groups.

Bake Me Please: Why was a show about cake so lacking in flavor?

Be Mine SuperStar: You had a real opportunity to explore a fan and idol romance and had Punn show so little growth. I hope the footage of First’s range is helpful now that Ja is out of BL.

Be My Favorite: You redid that whole amusement park date and muddled so much of what the hell happened on that day.

Between Us: You had years to make this interesting. Why are there five pairs and why is the end of this a JC Penny catalog photoshoot?

Dangerous Romance: What the fuck happened to the Sailom we had in episode 1 and 2 before that gun incident?

Hidden Agenda: Tee, what the hell was this? Twelve weeks of this?

I Feel You Linger in the Air: You may be the most beautiful show, with some of the most impressive performances of the year, but you absolutely botched this ending. Finish the goddamn season next time.

Love in Translation: I love you, but that whole kidnapping plot was so stupid at the end.

Low Frequency: I like your OST. That's about it.

My Dear Gangster Oppa: No examination about how gaming friendships become close quickly because of the combination of anonymity and teamwork (shout out to @twig-tea for this excellent summation).

My School President: Saving your gay commentary for the final episode felt like a conservative choice. I want more from you next time.

Naughty Babe: You retconned your own characters to tell a worse story. Unforgiveable.

Never Let Me Go: You didn’t know if you wanted to be a high school BL or a mafia story. It was difficult to watch.

Only Friends: I cannot believe you did Boston like that at the end. Either give Force’s character a clear personality next time, or keep him enigmatic; half measures make him and Book look worse. Sand was absolutely embarrassing. Boeing was a waste. Ending on all of them paired like that felt so unearned.

Step By Step: You forgot to ground Jeng’s external dreams at the end, so the final two episodes are just frustrating.

I’m glad I got that off my chest. We can go into the next year now.

Korea Put in the Work This Year

I really like the efforts from the various Korean studios this year. I really hope we get a Strongberry joint next year, but I want to acknowledge that we had 18 Korean BL dramas I watched this year, and at least three of them I think are must watches: Our Dating Sim, Sing My Crush, and The Eighth Sense. Beyond that, I think Love Tractor, Unintentional Love Story, and A Breeze of Love are easy recommendations.

It’s really impressive how the complaint for me this year with Korean BL is not about them using their time poorly. It’s more about normal drama concerns, where I think characterization is a little weak, or a theme doesn’t land squarely. This rapid iteration from the Korean studios is really impressive to watch, and I’m excited to see what some of the recognized players do next year.

Taiwan and The Philippines Have Been Quiet for Me

I wasn’t really able to connect with much from the Philippines this year except for The Day I Loved You. I never wrote about The Day I Loved You, but this beautiful and heart wrenching show is one of my favorites from this year. I wasn’t too keen on the Oxin Films offerings of this year, and I’m still chasing down the ones from The IdeaFirst Company.

As for Taiwan, this new BL project from the end of the year just isn’t hitting. Kiseki: Dear to Me also ended up really hurting me with the way they used Wayne Song and Huang Chun Chih. I love that angry little man with the white hair, but I’m still salty about Wayne and the general mess of that show.

Japan was Busy This Year

I watched 16 new shows, a few older ones, and a few movies this year from Japan. We haven’t gotten this much from them ever. I continue to love the Drama Shower project from MBS, and my beloved What Did You Eat Yesterday? returned this year. We had pretty stellar outings with Our Dining Table, If It’s With You, and I Cannot Reach You.

I think a third of the Japanese BL I’ve tracked on MDL actually released this year. That’s huge.

Still, I am going to side eye Minato’s Laundromat 2. You were the show that let me down the most this entire year. More than Only Friends, more than Step By Step, and even more than Kiseki. You absolutely blew it. You were telling a great story about a man with an acute case of internalized homophobia coming out of his shell and learning to love his younger partner and you blew it for stupid amnesia nonsense. I will never forgive you for this.

Where Were All the Uncles This Year?

Really, without Jim from Moonlight Chicken, and without the men from What Did You Eat Yesterday? we had an alarming dearth of older gay characters passing on knowledge and wisdom to the youngsters this year. What the hell happened?

Rare Dynamics Won: Second Chance Romance and Friends to Lovers!

We had so much second chance romance this year. It’s really my favorite version of gay romance because gays don’t always have ideal settings when they’re young. We had Our Dating Sim, Individual Circumstances, Jun & Jun, The End of the World With You, Tokyo in April is…, Be My Favorite, Love Class Season 2, and A Breeze of Love. I am satisfied.

Friends to Lovers is actually so rare in romance and we have so many to choose from this year! The best examples are I Cannot Reach You and Sing My Crush, but we also have one of the pairs in Love Class Season 2.

Gay Thoughts

I had a couple of ongoing thoughts this year about queerness in BL.

First, I want to return to my post about Sing My Crush and La Pluie, and how I assert that Men Need to Be Angry Sometimes. More than giving men grace to be righteously angry or upset about things, along with letting them express it in ugly ways, I really want to get into how we engage with these shows. I will stop engaging with moralistic reads on characters in 2024. I will no longer engage with asks, reblogs, or meta gripping the fandom where we're judging the moral fiber of the character.

The question that really only matters for me at this point is: Is this act from the character justified from their characterization, the narrative, or genre conventions; and is it interesting? Whether or not the character is good or bad reeks of the lame arguments about good and bad representation, and I am not watching BL like I’m being graded in Sunday school.

The second thing I really want to acknowledge at the end of the year is that the gay sex is finally getting better again. I watched The Novelist this year, and we have taken so long to get back to the space that show took us on the portrayal of male-male intimacy. We are in the genre about people with dicks. It should feel like it. There should be a masculine component there that feels specific to queer intimacy.

I will acknowledge 2 Cutie 2 Pie, A Boss and a Babe, Be Mine SuperStar, Bed Friend, Candy Color Paradox, For Him, I Cannot Reach You, Kiseki: Dear to Me, La Pluie, Love Class 2, Love in Translation, Love Mate, Middleman’s Love, Naughty Babe, Only Friends, The End of the World With You, Tokyo in April is…, and Wedding Plan for your contributions.

Final Thoughts

I like how broad the genre felt this year, and I enjoyed how much speculative fiction is entering into the conversation. I don’t know how I feel about there being five vampire stories in the works next year, but overall I’m glad that we’re getting more experimental concepts. I’m burnt out on the college engineering BL, and would like to see more shows about working adults.

Despite how grumpy I was for at least three months, I think this has genuinely been one of the best years we’ve ever had in the genre. I made a lot of new friends in BL this year, and I’m excited to see what comes next. Thank you all for spending some of your time with me this year and I’ll see you in the next one.

#Ben writes #best of bl 2023 #bl series #thai bl #japanese bl #taiwanese bl #filipino bl #korean bl #ben watches

[itsjustmylifeconfessions]

I loved episode 6 for so many reasons (Pedro your Emmy nomination is secured!) but two things really caught my attention while watching the episode and seeing people reacting to it (on YouTube, twitter, here...)

The amount of male reactors that didn't know what a menstrual cup was, and even thought it was some sort of birth control, shouldn't have been surprising to me but damn y'all really don't know anything do you?

One video I watched they were saying Maria was trying to control Ellie, by giving her birth control and cutting her hair against her will. They did not think Maria was being genuinely helpful at all.

Now let me tell you, as a woman, I would have helped another woman with everything she needs immediately. We have a shower, let me get you a nice soap. Need period products? I got you. I have scissors do you need a haircut? Let me get you clean underwear, do you need a bra? Here have a hair tie.

When Ellie found the tampons in ep 4 that made me so happy, then this happens and this display of not only women's solidarity towards each other but this awareness of our daily issues actually warms my heart.

I've always wondered what it would be like to be a woman in an apocalyptic world. We need these things. We don't just want them, we need them. I have cramps that are so bad sometimes I think I'm gonna pass out, even if I take meds, but I have never, not even once, watched a scene with a woman even acknowleding her period. unless if for some bulshit pregnancy arc but don't get me started

The second thing was that a lot of people (not just men in this case) thought that Joel was having a heart attack, when it was so clear he was experiencing something like a panic attack/anxiety/PTSD episode.

The lack of awareness on mental health is so clear. Maybe it's because I deal with anxiety and know what it feels like, but I understood immediately what was happening in those scenes.

We are so used to not talking about it. It should be so obvious to everyone but it wasn't. Because we don't even discuss this in real life.

I love that the show doesn't shy away from such important things that somehow for us are taboo. Mental health, women's health, these are things we don't really see in shows like this and I love that they are not hiding from it.

Ellie is a girl, she has periods. She also has a lot of trauma to unpack. Joel is not a robot, he's been through so much of course there's trauma there, of course he'll have PTSD and anxiety and have panic attacks on the possibility of caring for someone so much again and failing to protect them.

Anyway, I'd love to talk about everything I've been loving about this show but this post is too long already. I'm loving how they are adapting this story, they are doing a fantastic job, and the things they are changing/adding are only making the story better, and I can't wait for what's coming next.

#im surprised every time i see periods being acknowledged at all tbh #AND PEDRO THE EMMY IS YOURS BABY #the last of us #tlou #hbo #episode 6 #ep 6 #1x06 #pedro pascal #joel miller #bella ramsey #ellie

[magadauthan]

Ep 17: Rem Saverem

Day 17 of @trigun98watchparty : Vash and Knives get their origin story.

The viewer has learned over the last sixteen episodes that Vash is not an ordinary human being, or a human being at all. He's prone to weeping at moments of crisis with the name "Rem" on his lips. Now we get some answers.

Rem isn't particularly well characterized in the anime, for obvious reasons; she hadn't been fully written yet. Apparently she was inspired by Ellen Ripley, which is pretty badass.

There's a lot to unpack in this ep and it's not particularly silly, except for Knives' very relatable "I am so done with my mother and brother's shit" face. So, musings.

--The theme of going to the mats to save a child runs through all of Trigun and TriMax. Both Rem and WW will selflessly put themselves in harm's way to protect the young and innocent. Their methods are different.

...their outcomes are the same.

--Rem sees the two Independents as babies in need of care instead of aberrant monsters. To her, they are angels from God, and imo at least part of that is because she likely envisioned building a home and maybe having children with her (lover? husband?) Alex in their new world before he died. Vash and Knives are gifts to her to fill that void of emptiness.

--Brought this up last post, but it's worth remembering that for all their hyperintelligence and accelerated growth, Vash and Knives don't have the human experience of a toddler in their terrible twos/threes. Kids take things as black or white. They do not do nuance; they don't have any length of experience. Everything that's happening right now is the first and only time it's ever happened. How can you consider situations or instances relative to one another, if you have no experience? Or if your experience comes from what you saw on the computer?

--Knives is very aware of his own intelligence and his non-human superiority, but his emotional quotient is zero, and even as he gains experience, he sees no reason to bother with it. Either all humans are good, or all humans are bad. They take and don't give. Even if they do give, they don't fit with the paradigm and are disregarded. He's a child, with no nuance at all.

--Rem's philosophy is that no one has the intrinsic right to deprive another being of its life. The fallacy Knives can't resolve is that everyone has to eat (except him, in Tristamp... hmmm.) He's not wrong; the spider has to eat something. But I think there's a distinction between killing something because you feel like it or think they deserve it, and killing something because you're hungry.

--Back to the black and white - Knives can't resolve that either, because it's nuance, and when it comes to people... he's perfectly fine with messing with the crew's heads to show Vash and Rem that they're wrong. Steve is a dick and an abuser and possibly a rapist (it's unclear whether he actually did rape Mary or whether Knives made her think that he did) but does he deserve to die for it?

--When it comes down to it... I don't think anyone has a black and white answer. That's as far as I'm going with that.

--Vash clearly struggles with this same question but falls on the side of not killing anyone, no matter how threatened he or his loved ones are. Does he have the right to kill anyone? Probably not. Is he justified if there's no other way out? Guess we'll find out.

On a personal note... I appreciate Rem a lot more now than I did 20 years ago, before kids. It ain't easy. She had two of them at once and she did her damn best. Give the woman her mom jeans and a lifetime of appreciation for getting in there and putting her money where her mouth was. That corn ain't gonna shuck itself.

#trigun #trigun 98 #trigun 98 watch party #Day 17 #rem saverem #vash the stampede #millions knives

[discotitsposts]

ok so the lauren ep (spoilers so if u have never seen this one ever DO NOT READ ON IF YOU DONT WANT SPOILERS)

lots to unpack

GARCIAS VOICEMAIL - literally crying

applauding mggs directing

me pretending to be shocked at emily’s past even though i’ve seen this a million times

applauding mggs directing again

angry morgan

penelope’s outfit is so cute!!

spencer is adorable

JJ IS BACK!! yayyy!!

lol rossi saying hoodrat and spencer sniffing

feel bad for seaver :( but it’s nice how rossi treats her like a daughter

PAGETS ACTING is SUPERB

IAN DOYLE UNHAND PRENTISS THIS INSTANT

feel bad for the kid :(

prentiss fighting for her life and cheering her on

haha she hit ian in the face

OH NO OH NO NOOOO EMILY (again i’ve seen this and know everything that happens after this episode)

MORGAN SAYING STAY WITH ME BABY AHHHHHH

NOOOOOOSAD

everyone sad :((( NO THEIR FACES

JJS FACE

spENCER saying “i never got to say goodbye” NO

garCIA CRYINGNOOOOOOHOTCH MORGAN ROSSI SEAVER EVERYONE IN CRUJNY HOTCH BEING SAD

EMILYS FUNERLA NOONIOOOO

emily in paris lol

jemily moment at the end

bye bye emily :(

applauding mgg directing one last time mwah

#criminal minds #spencer reid #mgg #criminal minds rewatch #penelope garcia #aaron hotchner #jj jareau #ashley seaver #david rossi #derek morgan

[llannasvsp]

Every time I think about Crystalized Lloyd, the more sad I get.

Let's recap his life, shall we? - Abandoned by both parents. - Bullied at his school. - Publicly humiliated by the ninja (RotS, ep 1). - Literally forced to grow too quickly AND to fight his father. - Loses his dad again. - Gets betrayed by a girl he liked, who happens to bring back his evil dad. - HIS DAD DISOWNS HIM. AND ALSO ALMOST KILLS HIM MULTIPLE TIMES THROUGHOUT SONS OF GARMADON AND HUNTED.

There's a lot more we could unpack. That's not the point. The point is, I don't understand how people can expect him to be okay?? with the idea of working with his dad in Crystalized. Do we remember in Sons of Garmadon when Misako is commending the fact that Lloyd sees the good in everyone and he responds: "Not anymore"? That line gives us all we need to know that Lloyd is a very skeptical person because he has been hurt so many times. He didn't trust Akita at first once he found out she wasn't a wolf, so why would he trust his father who has tried to end his life many times?

I understand that the writing in Crystalized is just... not good. Personally I think he shouldn't have forgiven Harumi so quickly (if at all), especially since that contradicts the way he acts with Garmadon, but that's a different topic. However, if you think Lloyd faced major character regression in Crystalized I would genuinely love to read why, because I cannot emphasize enough how in character I think he is.

#in defense of crystalized lloyd #sorry if i just keep saying the same things in these posts #i just need to get some of these things off my chest #ninjago #ninjago lloyd #lloyd garmadon #ninjago crystalized #lloyd #crystalized #crystalized ninjago #lego ninjago #ninjago textpost

[le-trash-prince]

OF Episode 6 Thoughts: Top/Mew

I finally got to watch this week’s ep and there is SO MUCH TO UNPACK. I have too many thoughts so I’m splitting them between posts.

First of all: What a fucking episode. I was either laughing or screaming the entire time. I love this shit so much. Everyone in this group sucks!

Mew's bi momma! 🙌

When Mew said “I want you to meet my parents at the end of the year” and then “But don’t count on us still being together” I was like “What the fuck Mew?” LOL. Like Mew, I know you will probably never understand this, but just because you are not seeing anyone else doesn't mean that you are emotionally committed to this relationship. You keep pulling back and giving mixed signals!

“I think the reason I was fine without a relationship was because I got enough love from family and friends” Mew how about you recognize that you’re demi instead of psychoanalyzing your slutty friends!

Tbh tho, I know it's really hard to come to terms with your own sexuality, especially when it's so different from everyone around you. We try to come up with reasons as to why people are different, rather than being able to accept that these differences can be inherent to who we are as people.

I think this episode showed more than any other just how genuine Top’s feelings for Mew really are. And of course this had to be the episode it all came crashing down.

Like the notebook of drawings he gave him? That was super sweet and thoughtful as a gift—ppl prob expect someone like Top to just throw money at his lovers but instead he put time and effort into his gift. You can’t draw someone like that without really looking at them. There wasn’t anything in that gift that said "fuckboy" or “I’m doing this just so you will sleep with me.”

Felt like there was an intentional parallel between Top kissing Mew’s forehead while he was asleep and Ray kissing Mew on the mouth.

I feel like I need to rewatch to process “Mew and Ray get in a fight” and “Ray gave Mew the audio file and Mew believed him”

When Mew and Top got home, I loved how the change and tension felt tangible. Like something about Mew going into the bedroom by himself and leaving Top in the living room spoke to a barrier between them

Mew pinning Top to the bed did a lot of things for me thanks 👍

“I love the way you sound in bed” honestly some cinematic poetry, I was hollering.

As much as I feel like Top was coerced into sleeping with Boston, what can he even say to defend himself with? “I didn’t want to sleep with him?” Well it sure sounded like you did. “I did it because I thought you lied to me?” Yeah that’s not gonna make Mew understand. Lol. Again, I don't know if Top even knows if he's allowed to not want to have sex with someone.

It’s a hard situation with a lot of grey area! And even tho we kind of knew this was how Mew was gonna find out, it's the worst way for him to find out.

Of course Mew is going to be hurt. This is like the worst outcome for him, and it revealed a lot of his insecurities around his lack of sexual experience. Especially after talking big at the beginning "My senses are always correct and I know everything there is to know about love."

I wonder if he even blamed himself for being bad at sex as to why he didn’t enjoy his first time with Top all that much, rather than it simply being that he might not really get much out of sex at all. It's okay if you don't want sex, Mew, or if you don't enjoy it, or even if it takes time for you to enjoy it!

“I’m not worth enough for you to love only me.” Mew. Mew. *shakes him* First of all, Top thinks Boston is a pile of burnable trash. He does not love that man! Second of all, please don’t tie self worth to romantic love or to ideals of monogamy. It is never going to end well.

Again, "I think the reason I was fine without a relationship is because I got so much love from family and friends." Mew are you being honest with yourself? You even said yourself that the reason you slept with Top was because you were worried about him getting bored with you.

I may have mentioned this before, but I think the reason that "mastermind Mew" was so popular with the fandom at the beginning of the series is because people wanted it to be true, because if Mew had seen this coming, he wouldn't have gotten hurt. I don't think it came from "we think Mew is evil or manipulative or whatever," I think we just didn't want to watch a person as naive as Mew get hurt. Because that's what happens the majority of the time in real life. People get hurt.

Sad lonely himbo Top in the bathtub 👍

Overall, I really enjoy watching their relationship. It's very complicated; it's nowhere near as straightforward as a "fuckboy cheats on his virgin boyfriend" plotline could easily be. I don't think they had a solid foundation for their relationship. They enjoy their dates, but there hasn't been a lot of great communication between them, which as I mentioned on a previous post, is very normal, especially for a first or second relationship. And for both of them, I think this is their first real attempt at a relationship, and neither of them know what they're doing.

In the preview, we see a clip of Mew in the bathtub where his expression changes, and it really looks like a symbolic transformation to me. Whether we get revenge era Mew or "let's try this again with more emotional transparency" Mew, I'm here for it.

#only friends the series #only friends #em post #topmew

[valkyrieandstrangeridingaragorn]

We finally got a Thor mention and hints of Loki being homesick in episode 3. Mobius and Loki are at the 1893 Chicago World's Fair when they see the Norse exhibit that has 3 carved wooden pillars of Balder, Odin, and Thor.

Mobius: "Does it make you homesick?"

Loki: "No. It’s completely inaccurate, first of all."

Mobius: "What, you don’t think that looks like Odin?"

Loki: "It’s embarrassing. It’s a crass generalization. I mean, you can’t reduce an entire culture down to a simple diorama. Such poverty of imagination."

Mobius: "Is somebody feeling a little left out that they’re not up there?"

Loki: "No. And why’d they include Balder? No one’s even heard of him."

Mobius: "Sure they have. Balder the Brave. You know, sometimes I forget that you’re one of them. You are one of them. Blows my mind." (walks away)

Loki: (lingers behind, looking somberly at Thor's carving) "... Thor’s not that tall."

First off, "You know, sometimes I forget that you’re one of them." Uh huh. That you, Loki writers?

Secondly, "You are one of them." After Thor 1, I wonder how hearing that makes Loki feel?

Wow, there's a lot to unpack there. First off, I was curious so I googled:

Mobius is asking Loki if he feels homesick after the TVA took him from his timeline, kidnapped him and forced him away from his family, and Mobius himself told him to his face he could never go back? After Mobius admitted in S1 that Lokis are the variants the TVA kidnapped the most? He's asking him if he's homesick? Is that a joke?

Then, Balder? Seriously? What's the point of the name-drop? Unless he shows up in future eps, it makes no sense. He was never part of the Thor movies or Loki's story. If Loki had taken the opportunity to share some story related to him and Balder then cool, but if it's just a name-drop then... meh.

That line about it being a "generalization" or "reducing an entire culture"... uh, Asgard was full of statues. Loki had a statue of himself built post-TDW (okay, not this Loki so.. fair). But I don't understand Loki's line there. How is a statue 'poverty of imagination'? It's such an ignorant thing to say. It's not even funny either. So either I'm missing something... or that line is nonsensical.

Mobius reply that Loki feels "left out". Cool, make a joke about Loki's feelings of inadequacy on Asgard. Feelings that were perfectly understandable and accurate despite whatever Marvel tries to claim these days. Loki is a Prince. Same as Thor. Not the firstborn, not Asgardian, but a Prince nonetheless. We saw in Thor1 how everyone around him treated him as lesser, so to have Mobius say this to his face (this Loki is what... two years post-Thor 1? So not that long ago this guy tried to kill himself for the fact that he felt like he didn't belong) and for Loki to not get mad at it? Again, makes no sense. And it's such a bad line for his series. He doesn't even get the narrative on his side on his damn series.

"You are one of them". Was. Well, he never was. But still. He used to be one of them and he would have had a life with them if the TVA hadn't intervened. If Mobius was truly trying to be sympathetic how come he doesn't show any remorse? Any guilt? Does he at any point even think "damn, this is his family and he won't ever see them again because we kidnapped him from his timeline". Of course he doesn't.

I hate this season and I'm not even watching it.

#loki negativity

[narashikari]

So, a while back I made this theory to counter the one regarding Rinne and Houtaro being siblings.

I think last episode's time shenanigans has definitely debunked the Houtaro-and-Rinne-are-siblings theory, since kid!Houtaro clearly has no idea who Kudo Fuga is, much less acts like he's his father, and vice-versa.

It also debunks parts of my theory, specifically the ones where it was the Alchemist Union that wiped Houtaro's memories of the Chemmies and alchemy (Fuga did that himself), and Fuga giving the Driver to Houtaro because he knew Houtaro's dad (it was because he'd seen Houtaro protecting the Chemmies).

But now we have something of a mystery on our hands....

There's quite a lot to unpack from this ep. For one, Kid!Houtaro somehow has access to that dimension that the Chemmies later brought him to as a teenager. For another, he already seems to have the ability to use alchemy and communicate with the Chemmies.

Now, this could be explained by how he befriended the Chemmies as a child, though we have yet to see how he came into contact with them to begin with. Since that could've happened for a variety of reasons, I'll set that aside for the time being.

What really interests me is this scene.

This line about these goggles... the ones that he turns into his Gotcha Igniter. Specifically, the bit about his dad having goggles that resemble them...

I do have to wonder... why associate Houtaro's new powerup to something about his dad? And one that's so deeply tied with his ability to use alchemy, too (having been created by him as a child using alchemy and being turned into its current form by him using alchemy)?

Even more so since in the present day, Houtaro seems to hold a bit of resentment towards him for not being around more. We know Houtaro's dad is always off on "adventures", which is why he's absent. And yet, the goggles that represent the very reason why he's nowhere to be seen became Houtaro's powerup?

Not only that... but it seems to parallel with what happened to Rinne. She became a Kamen Rider... with a gift from her estranged father, Fuga. And now Houtaro gets a powerup with an item that he associates with his distant father, too? What are the odds of that not meaning anything?

We also find out in this episode that Geryon has the ability to manipulate memories on a massive scale. Not just erasing memories like we've previously seen, but implanting false ones as well, as he claimed that he was the one who made everyone believe Kudo Fuga stole the Chemmies and was a traitor.

And he may be pulling similar shenanigans on Minato (e.g. with how Minato now believes the natural order is to use Chemmies to make Malgams, instead of preventing them from becoming Malgams). Notably, he has also unpersoned Minato from everyone not associated with the Alchemist Academy. "It's like Minato-sensei never existed...."

Putting all of this together... I'm now more convinced that Houtaro's dad was himself an alchemist as well, one that was opposed to Geryon. He paid the price for going against him by becoming effectively unpersoned within the alchemist's society by Geryon.

And he himself was unaware of the unpersoning, because he had his memories of being an alchemist wiped as well. His current wanderlust is maybe him subconsciously trying to find his "Gotcha", aka his alchemy, much in the same way Houtaro was aimless until he (re)discovered his alchemy.

As for Kudo Fuga not knowing Houtaro, perhaps his father and Fuga were not working together at all, but came to similar realizations by interacting with the Chemmies. Both separately came to the same conclusion that Geryon aims to misuse them. After all we know there are alchemists working outside the Union's purview, like Spanner and Kyoka, so Houtaro's dad could be one of them and figured it out like that while Fuga figured it out while he was working within the Union.

Or maybe Houtaro's dad was in the Union, leaving behind enough clues before he was unpersoned that Fuga pieced together the truth.

As for the goggles? Maybe they were part of the equipment his dad used in alchemical experiments (i.e., they were safety goggles). He was so attached to them that even after his memories of being an alchemist were wiped he felt like they were important (hence why he wouldn't just lend them to kid!Houtaro)... much like how Houtaro felt something tugging at his heart when he first met Hopper-1...

#kamen rider gotchard #kari rambles again #long post #i should be answering asks #i spent two hours on this theory instead

[kojo-is-adorable]

if you don't want any spoilers of season 6 ignore this

but to add to my previous post on the promo clip, Lucy's outfit looks suspiciously similar to the one she wears when she says "did you to undermine me" also did you guys notice Lucy is not wearing THE necklace in the i love you scene. The i love you scene is also located in the interrogation room which makes me think it happens right after the lie detector test. this means the vague layout for ep1 and 2 is Lucy and Tim ride together, Tim acts like an ass, they fight, Lucy feels undermined, lie detector , i love you, fight, wedding. but if we are saying the undermine and the i love you are from ep 1 then its more likely to be: Chenford riding together, Tim acts like an ass, Lucy feels undermined and Chenford fight , bachelorette party, make up at work later. that is just my vague guess order wise.

there is also this video:

there is a lot to unpack about this video

1.this is in Tims office so he just lets Lucy do whatever she wants in his office

2. he has a motivational poster which i just know Lucy convinced him to get

3. he doesn't have a sofa anymore so all the chenford fanfic writers will sob at that

4. i know everyone is going crazy over the background photo and i believe its Lucy since it looks like Lucy's face shape, also it doesn't make sense to have a picture of your ex in your office. I mean i know i don't.

5. TTim knows : detective exam = less time with Lucy and hes still more than happy to help which is something hes obviously gonna do i just thought it was a cute supportive bf moment

6. they Obvioulsy had a chat about Primm blocking her which Tim likely blamed on himself

7. Tim casually puts it out there that he knows her better than she does

8. chenford banter is the cutest

9. we also find out when the i don't like that smile scene

10. Lucy and Tim will be riding together alone for the first time since everyone found out about them

#the rookie #chenford #lucy chen #tim bradford #screaming crying throwing up #they are everything to me #they are in love #i will die happy once i know what happens in this ep #Instagram

[bengiyo]

Minato’s Laundromat 2 Ep 1 Stray Thoughts

I was not even hoping for this to get a sequel, but I am so excited that we are. We so often leave characters at their starting line. Minato unpacked a lot of his own internalized homophobia and cowardice in the last season, and I’m excited to see what the showrunners think the early phase of his relationship with Shin will look like. I’m not much of a fan of time skips, and so this is what I’ve not-so-secretly hoped for when I ask for more stories about gay people staying together.

I like that we’re opening this season with a reaffirmation that Minato actually likes running the laundromat.

There he is! My favorite menace!

I like the new intro.

Asuka!! My second favorite menace!

Okay, I’m legitimately excited for Asuka pursuing more learning for himself. There was a melancholy resignation about his life hanging over him before.

Shin is still crushing the hopes and dreams of potential female suitors.

I really love Japanese filmmaking styles around walking. Asuka jumps in step with Shin, revealing that the two are still friends (despite Shin’s apparent irritation with Asuka). When their issues come up, Shin immediately falls behind. They both stop, and this kicks them into an A-B shot conversation briefly. We’ve landed at the first worry that has broken their stride. It’s good! It communicates so much. Shin is worried about his three-month-old relationship with Minato, Asuka is being picked on to study by everyone and teased about his crush on Shun. These two are still the gay friends who’ve been together forever but are always seemingly picking on each other. It’s great.

I’m enjoying this divide in the way these two are handling being together. Shin has known of his attraction for a long time, and wants Minato to be direct and open about his feelings. Minato is still shy about them, and gets embarrassed.

“Have I been a good boy for the last three months?” There’s my favorite menace!

I’m relieved we’re getting Minato’s internal monologue. Shin is going to speak his feelings aloud because he has no shame about them, but we the audience need to hear Minato’s worries. He’s too anxious a character for us to just read them from his face.

Curious where Minato’s specific hang up on saying “I like you” to Shin comes from.

See, this is what I’m talking about with good use of side couples. We cut away from the mains to Asuka telling Shun he likes him and Shun telling him to focus on his studies. Shun is incapable of returning the romantic feelings Asuka is projecting at him, but he’s been clear about that the whole time. Still, he agrees that Asuka’s presence is a positive one in his life. I’m LOCKED IN.

This beach always looks so uncomfortable.

I have missed Minato’s shirts, but not how hungry they make me.

I love that Asuka goes to Minato to complain about Shun. Minato is also the one not meeting his partner’s vocalized needs, so it puts him in the awkward position of defending Shun. Also amused at Minato dodging the question about whether he and Shin have been intimate, because we know for sure they have.

I hope Shin isn’t playing games with Minato about being busy…but also low-key I hope he’s using this as an opportunity to mess with Minato. I’m sorry. I’m a little shallow. I like when characters misuse malicious compliance to give their romantic partners what they say they want.

“Who’s the real kid here? It seems like it’s me.” Love when we read a character correctly.

You know Minato is approaching 30 because he’s excited about a new broom.

Shin working at the same cram school as Shun gives so much potential for other character dynamics.

Just one of these times I want to see Shin throw hands with Asuka.

Shin remains my favorite. Minato is playing avoidance games again and Shin is not having it.

I’m curious if the reason Shin can’t go home tonight is about the ruined refrigerator and he’s just being dramatic.

I’m not sure how living together works when Minato still has all these hang ups.

I like the new version of the beach outro.

Nishigaki Sho and Kusakawa Takuya are just ridiculously attractive. My goodness.

I’m genuinely excited about what domesticity looks like for these two.

I missed these boys so much! I don’t care if we don’t have a manga to rely upon. I am so excited to get a season about these two starting their relationship. This feels like a warmup for TV Tokyo before we get more of What Did You Eat Yesterday? in the fall. I am just so satisfied with my BL experience lately.

#minato shouji coin laundry 2 #minato shouji coin laundry #minato’s laundromat #minato's laundromat 2 #japanese bl #bl series #Ben watches

[boysplanetrecaps]

Boys Planet Eps 9-10 Recap: Over Me

Hello, team BP! As you may know, I already wrote a recap/master post for episode 9, and another one for episode 10. This recap focuses just on the stuff that’s relevant to team Over Me -- their rehearsal period in episode 9 as well as their rehearsal footage and performance in episode 10. But you’ll have to get over the read more first. 

The Trainees

Here’s a list of the trainees in this group along with their rank as of episode 8 and their two previous missions:

Zhang Hao 2 / Kill This Love/ Tomboy Jay 12/ Love Me Right / Home Ricky 14/ Back Door /Rush Hour Chen Kuan Jui 22 / Kill This Love/ Butterfly Lee Jeong Hyeon 24 / Love Me Right / Gang

The First Rehearsal Segment

At 43:13 in Episode 9, we visit with team Over Me for about 4.5 minutes. 

The camera focuses on the Leader sticker on the floor, next to a bit of red fluff that must have come from those red fabric bands the boys are using in their dance. Looks like Yoon Jongwoo just took the sticker off and threw it, or dropped it, on the floor. 

Zhang Hao is saying, “It must’ve been really hard to be a leader of 10 people.” Already, there’s a lot to unpack there. They’re talking about Yoon Jongwoo, clearly. But saying it like that sounds like they’re excusing something about him, something negative about him. Right? Like the way that when the poor Supercharger group fell apart at the self-evaluation performance, the trainees said, “Oh, this choreography must be super hard.” You talk like that when you’re excusing something negative.

Remember how I said, when I talked about T h e  G r e a t  R e s h u f f l i n g  that I think they got rid of Jongwoo in part because they were just sick of him, and wanted Hao as the leader instead? I do think that happened. I think Jongwoo got stuck in a sort of negative headspace and people weren’t enjoying it. I think it was easier for Jongwoo to be the comeback kid than to be an actual contender. My take is that he’s climbed so high that now he’s scared to fall, and it’s making him act less friendly and warm than he used to. I could be wrong about all of this, of course.

That said, I think the PRIMARY reason they kicked out Jongwoo is that he was going to steal the show. As a result, the performance just won't be as good as it could have been. I feel sad about that. 

But as much of a bummer as it is, given the situation, I can’t blame Hao and the others for doing what they had to do to succeed. They didn’t create the situation; they just reacted to it. And I like Hao! I’ve liked him since the start of the show. 

The team nominates Hao to be the leader, and we’ve seen him do well as a leader in the past so it should go ok. After all, as he reminds us, he studied to be a music teacher and is “passionate about teaching others.” Aww, I get it, Hao. He promises to help everyone shine well on stage. Everyone but Keita and Yoon Jungwoo.

After electing Hao the leader, the team immediately also gives Hao the Killing Part. Lee Jungyeon gets to keep sub-vocal 2 that he wrote his own rap for, and as it turns out, he can also sing decently well (he’s a bit pitchy, but he has a nice tone and can probably work on it). We see almost nothing of Chen Kuan Jui this whole time, and he ends up with sub-vocal 4, so I guess Hao is taking sub-vocal 3 as well as the killing part. 

And Hao feels certain they’ll win first place. Well, I was pretty sure that whatever 5 random trainees ended up in this song, this would be the winning team, so there’s that. 

Again, we see absolutely nothing of them rehearsing. We didn’t see any of them rehearsing in episode 8, either. Is the show purposefully keeping the choreo a surprise until we see them actually doing it? 

Second Rehearsal Segment + Performance

Skip to 1:09:56 in episode 10 for the rest of the performance. 

So, I probably could have gotten this recap out sooner -- I was all up to date and I got most of all of this written -- but then I kind of stalled out because I just didn’t really want to talk about what happens with Over Me. It’s actually made me genuinely sad. My fella was like, you seem down, are you ok? And I had to be like, “I’m sad about what happened on my silly Korean reality show.” To his credit, he just listened and agreed with me a lot. 

What could it be? What could have made BPR-Noona so sad? Let’s back up to the beginning of the rehearsal footage! You’ll find out either soon, or next episode! Let me give you 30 minutes of random filler first! 

Oh no wait, I don’t work for MNET. I’ll get to the point fairly quickly. 

As the boys take the stage, the judges talk about how this is a sexy song, and how it’s difficult to  perform on stage.

We see that some people in the audience are holding up Lee Jong Hyeon signs so that’s good, because right now there are like, 5 or 6 really popular foreign trainees, so we’ll need to pump up any slightly viable Korean candidates to make sure to get them into top 9 to replace them foreigners!.... Sigh. 

They all introduce themselves, and the audience goes crazy. 

Back stage, Yoon Jong Woo graciously wishes them well. Also Park Hanbin is holding a tiny fan. There’s so much to love about this picture.

But soon we skip back in time…. 

We skip to a rehearsal with the judges -- they’re dancing in front of Solji and we see Solji look like this: 

She asks if they’re going to record like this, because their singing seems half hearted, almost like they’re embarrassed of how sexy the song is. Ricky says they haven’t been practicing the vocals, and we’re left wondering -- what is going wrong with their rehearsals? 

Because MNET is incapable of telling a story in order, we now do a flashback inside a flashback, because that’s confusing! 

We skip to the day before. The team is working on the “rotations”, which seems to be formation changes. It doesn’t seem to be going very well, and as they’re trying to fix mistakes, Zhang Hao wants to give every single suggestion a chance. It seems to be confusing and frustrating for everyone. In fact, Chen Kuan Jui ends up sitting out the hall, just needing a few minutes to himself to calm down. (Interestingly, CKJ and Zhang Hao speak Korean when they’re alone together; CKJ is from Taiwan, so his language is actually totally different from Zhang Hao’s, but it’s interesting that the language they choose is Korean.)

We see the team at dance rehearsal with one of the psychopath dance teachers. The choreographer of the piece is there, and she’s the woman who did the killing part in the demo -- I pretty much assumed that she was the choreographer, so good job me! They ask the team how Hao is doing as a leader, and they don’t say anything for a moment, so the psycho says, “Ah, I see,” and he’s kind of right. 

CKJ interviews that Zhang Hao isn't really doing a good job as a leader because they try every suggestion every time and maybe that’s not so great. Lee Jeong Hyeon says it was inefficient and Ricky says they still don’t know what to do. 

Hey maybe you shouldn’t have kicked out Yoon Jongwoo and Keita because things tend to work out better when they’re around 

The group rehearses their dance in front of psycho judge and they actually bump into each other and stuff. It’d be comical if the stakes weren’t so high. The psycho dance teacher is like, what the fuck? And for once I’m with him. They have no excuse. The choreographer doesn’t say a word the whole time (that we see). I think she’s kind of… over this. So to speak. 

Later on Solji meets with Zhang Hao, apparently at his request. (Can I request to meet with Solji? I just want to chat about like, singing and kpop and I don’t know, life? I like Solji.) He tells her that he’s just having trouble figuring out how to lead the team.

 She basically tells him worry less about everyone’s emotions, and to be more firm and more in control. 

Next day, Hao goes in early and rearranges the choreo himself. When the team comes in, he teaches the new rotations and they begin working on it. It seems to be working a lot better now. 

Later, we see them at the recording studio, which is something we haven’t seen with any other group. Ricky gets praised for his pronunciation (but not his  vocals in general, which I think also deserve praise) and Lee Jong Hyeon gets told he sounds really professional in both singing and rap. We don’t see Jay singing, because the show hates him. We barely even see him at all. 

Look at him tucked in a corner. Come on, Jay, push for yourself just a little, man! 

We skip forward and now it’s D-day. 

They come out and the stage is all draped in red fabric. 

To continue with your Korean reading skills, 팀 says "team", as in, the English word spelled in Korean letters. The thing that looks like a capital E is a T, the straight line is an i, and the square is an M.

Part of me wishes they’d just gone full tilt and decorated the stage with like, multiple beds. But I guess the gauze draped over pianos (?) was as close to that as they’d dare. 

There’s a cute moment backstage when Yoon Jongwoo tells Takuto to cover his eyes, and Takuto, possibly not knowing that they’re joking with him, says “I can watch sexy stuff too.” 

The performance begins. 

My take:

I’m sorry to be kind of negative in these reviews. I really think all 28 trainees are exhausted emotionally and physically at this point, just living off of adrenaline for three months, and it’s starting to catch up to them. And yeah, this performance wasn’t quite… quite.

Also, stylist noonas fucked over Jay. 

I have to mentioning the problem with his styling up top, because I think it’s at least PART of what went wrong in terms of the vote. He’s capable of looking so much better than this -- what happened here? They made his eyebrows too dark, I think? And the choker screws with his proportions in a really bad way. Plus his chest is so light -- he needed to have consistent coloring from his neck down to wherever you could see with the shirt open. I don’t know, this just is all wrong. I’m not a stylist so I don’t know how to fix it but I’d start by taking the choker off for sure.

As for the actual performances...

Did you ever watch the video for Love Talk by WayV? I might catch hell from N-Citizens for this but that doesn’t give me any sparkles in my pants. It’s more like I cringe so hard, I almost fold inward and disappear into subspace -- except when Ten is on screen. Ten’s the only one who seems completely at ease with the overtly sexy message of the song. (If you’re not familiar, Ten is the one on screen from 0:00 to 0:20, among other times.) Everyone else is trying to look sexy or “serious” or… IDK, undressed, whatever. But Ten, I buy. There’s a reason that SM gave him Birthday. Whether he specifically makes your pants sparkle, you have to acknowledge that he owns this concept. Most people simply do not.

It’s really, really difficult to sell sexy without seeming sleazy, or inappropriately aggressive, or even worse, sleepy. I think a lot of trainees think that just staring at the camera dead eyed is sexy but it’s really not. I don’t know WHAT it is, to be honest. I just know that Ten can do it, and Kai can do it, and Joohoney and IM from Monsta X can do it. 

On this team, Chen Kuan Jui can do it. CKJ was utterly fearless and completely, 100%, “in” the song. I don’t find CKJ sexually attractive in particular -- who knows why one does or doesn’t find a particular person sexy -- but his fancam is sexy AF. I wish we could see him more, that he wasn’t behind the other trainees. I wish it was basically just a CKJ dance solo. Heck, even my fella picked CKJ out as obviously the best dancer in this group, and when the song was over said, “I kept waiting for that one blonde guy (he meant CKJ) to do a dance solo and he never did.”

Ricky was really good too, of course. I still think he’s occasionally just a tiny bit stiff in his body, but in terms of confidence, comfort level with the song, and facial expressions, he does great. He knows how to smile in a sexy way -- I think that’s super important. And his vocals are also really good. He’s just sort of outclassed by CKJ, for me. Also, if you watch either of their fancams, it really looks like they’re in two different songs, so I wish the group had spent a bit more time figuring out what style of dancing they were going for.

If I was only allowed to vote for one person, though, I would have voted for Jay, because he’s the one who I would least want replaced by some other trainee for this performance. I think Jay’s vocals kind of make the song what it is. His dancing and performance commitment was absolutely up to par for a main vocal -- vocalists are given a bit of leeway in terms of dancing and he doesn’t even really need it, as far as I’m concerned.  

Lee Jeonghyeon did ok, I don’t know, I have nothing really good or bad to say. Sorry. He looked handsome. His rap sounded good for a rap, though I think I would have liked the song better without it. (I’m a big fan of letting kpop songs NOT have a rap break in them, sometimes.) All I can think is, the team kept him, and not Yoon Jungwoo? God, Jungwoo would have killed this. 

For me the biggest disappointment was Zhang Hao. I don’t know what it is, because I’ve liked him since the beginning, but this performance was just sort of… flat. I think he was too busy leading and he’s too tired and maybe a sexy performance just isn’t in his wheelhouse yet. I both believe and hope he can do better under better conditions, because I know he’s extremely talented, it’s just that for me, he didn’t do as well as I would have hoped. 

It’s not as if Lee Jeonghyeon or Zhang Hao did badly; they both did well. They just didn’t shine, to me, or put sparkles in my pants.

Afterwards

The judges are impressed. They have nice things to say about Jay -- kind of? LipJ thinks Jay should have toned it down. They say Lee Jeonghyeon was cool and very handsome and that Zhang Hao pulled off the sexy part well. But we hear nothing about Ricky or CKJ, even though the judges MUST have said something nice about them.  

So the boys go back stage to the folding chairs of doom to find out their numerical value, and then the awful thing happens.  

Jay came in last with 485 votes. 

Everyone is shocked. But Jay just nods. He says he expected it because no one was really cheering for him.

Look how sad and shocked everyone is.

And watching at home, I felt a little sick. What the fuck. What the fuck is wrong here. 

A vote that low is punitive, you guys. That’s what they do when they hate you, or when you are Takuto. Jay isn’t Takuto, so they must hate him. Why? What is going on? 

You know what? I don’t think I want to know. Jay’s vocals were so good. There was no reason for him to get such a low vote except that maybe people think he’s “ugly” (do they? IDK) or because he’s foreign or there’s some dumb social media drama or whatever. Maybe it’s because he’s too passive and it gives people the cringies? I don’t care. His vocals were great so shut up and press A. 

I do think, however, that all this doesn’t necessarily mean Jay is doomed. The audience that goes to see live performances are not necessarily a representative sample of the full Star Creator vote. Plus, I think as the dust settles around this performance, the injustice of Jay receiving such a ridiculously low approval score will become clearer and clearer, and people may switch their vote to Jay. All I know is that I’m going to be voting for Jay from now on, because this is some fucked up bullshit. I’m also going to try to give his fancam some views.  

Zhang Hao comes in first with 852 points, which ties Haruto. I don’t exactly agree; I think Ricky or CKJ should have come in first, but I get it, it’s fine. I don’t like, hate Hao or anything. I don’t think this was his finest moment but I actually think that no one has really had their finest moment in this go-round. 

Zhang Hao interviews, “It was harder than I thought. The killing part had so many parts, so my mind was all over the place. I was worried if I could take first place. But when I saw the results I felt proud.” Aw, that's good. You worked really hard, Hao.

And that’s the end of this recap, and the end of episode 9-10 analysis. Next up is an elimination episode with metric crap-tons of filler. I’m caught up  so I should be able to get a recap to that out pretty fast. 

See you all in the next one, and thanks as always for reading! 

#boys planet #zhang hao #jay #ricky #ricky boys planet #chen kuan jui #lee jeonghyeon #over me

[weezly14]

Hey Weezly, wondered about your thoughts on EP 9 of TCR. Tough one to watch, at least for me anyway. Thanks!

Hi there. You may regret asking for my thoughts.

Let me preface this by saying that I came into this show wanting to like it. I think Tom Holland is a great actor, and the source material was interesting, and I was curious to see what they'd do with it - especially once it became clear they were going the "inspired by" route rather than an adaptation of the Billy Milligan book.

That being said, I think episode 9 is when we start seeing the plot really get going, and, as a result, see just how poorly constructed it is. Episode 9 laid bare all the flaws and issues I could ignore in previous episodes. I'm going to watch the last episode because I've invested all this time already, but I liked this show a lot more before I watched this episode.

Here's a brief bullet-pointed list of some of my issues with it:

i hate this courtroom drama angle. a) that's not how trial works and b) why the fuck are we having a trial in the first place. Is he not pleading guilty? The trial just makes it clear how convoluted and contrived the case is - a shooting that injured but did not kill - and I know we were given the heads up that the defense lawyer isn't a good trial lawyer 2 episodes ago or something, but god, I could've represented Danny better. And the prosecutor gave a great performance except I cannot imagine a judge allowing half the shit he did. Also, again, the defense lawyer? Didn't cross-examine Marlin? wtf

the racial and sexual politics of this show are all the fuck over the place, and I could sort of let it slide but nope, now I've gotta call it out. 1) the prosecutor has been so clearly and completely painted as The Bad Guy so she's an easy target for abuse from viewers because she's being mean to our protagonist, and the fact that she (and the judge, who I assume will give Danny a harsh sentence next week - because the jury decides the verdict but the judge decides the sentence) is black and Danny is white? Feels some kind of way. 2) Angelo on the stand? This is a drug dealer, why would he show up? Further on Angelo - in like a 10 second scene last week we saw that Jonny-Danny had apparently a sexual relationship with him which makes the trying to get a gun scene hit so different. There's so much to unpack here. And yet. 3) Jerome. So, like most of the actors on this show, he's given a great performance. He and Tom have had some great scenes. But a) the amount of emotional labor this black character has done for the white character he barely knows is vaguely upsetting, b) when we're first introduced to Jerome via Ariana it doesn't come across as Great Love (sure we can debate this but I digress) but as soon as he seeks out Danny in prison and on the stand we get that narrative of practically Soulmates, c) this show purports to take place in the 70s - not a great time to be gay! To say nothing of the extra layer of race. Stonewall was 1969, dudes. On the one hand, super glad we're not having to listen to slurs. On the other, how is seemingly everyone barely blinking at Danny having a female alter or at the very least, if they don't accept the idea of alters, cross-dressing and fucking dudes? The prosecutor tries to prove that Jerome and Danny/Ariana weren't a couple because they never interactied outside the club - I'm sorry, it's the 1970s. Again, there is so much to unpack here re: Jerome as both a black man and a gay man and! We are getting! Nothing!

I liked Rya well enough but this episode she really grated on me? Her monologues felt preachy and patronizing.

Candy. So, one of the things I've come back to over and over is - we know Marlin abused Danny, and now we're to believe that Candy, on some level, knew. We also know that she married Marlin and theoretically stayed with him for financial reasons. Financial abuse is real, I'm not discounting that. But aside from being a dick, we don't really see Candy and Marlin's relationship as terribly abusive. She's so deferential to him, and yet we never see why, what has her so scared of him. She has a job! Her child is out of the house! Her characterization has been nearly nonexistent and it's frustrating.

So after struggling with undiagnosed MPD/DID for his entire life, we're supposed to accept that Danny, who was given a diagnosis like three days ago, is suddenly able to control his alters? With no issue? The scene 2? 3? Episodes ago where he tells Rya there are voices and he needs help is completely undermined by how much of a nonissue his alters have been in the interim.

All press tour Tom has been saying this show is about asking for help, and Danny asked for help in that scene - which was a great scene, I felt so seen there - and then in episode 9 we get Rya saying how brave or whatever Danny is for asking for help. BUT! He didn't! He committed a crime and was sent to jail and ended up in these therapy/interrogation sessions and then eventually yes, asked for help. But he was not out there crying for help, asking to be saved. He had his alters! He was unaware that he wasn't okay!

It's so clear that this show doesn't know what it wants to be and doesn't know what its focus is. Is it Danny? Is it Rya? The first 4 episodes are their own fucking show, and 6-9 are their own show. 5 feels like its own thing, too.

Additionally, this show is set in the 1970s. Why? Because Billy Milligan. Except they took the teeth out of that story, completely sanitized it to the point that there are virtually no stakes, but kept the set dressing. But that's literally all it is at this point. We get b-roll of 70s London, we have the costumes and cars, but aside from one shot of defense lawyer in army fatigues, we have no real sense of where we are in time. That is the only allusion to Vietnam. The prosecutor talked about incarceration like she's also read The New Jim Crow. Not a slur to be heard despite the fact that we are allegedly between Stonewall and AIDS. Rya talks about mental health like someone might in the present day. If they were already going to not make this about Billy Milligan, why the fuck did they keep it set in the 70s?

It is so frustrating because the actors are giving it their all. Tom? No notes. I was moved this episode, I've been moved all season. But I cannot get away from how poorly constructed this all is. This could've been so good. We should've spent more time digging into each alter. (What the fuck purpose did Mike serve? Ariana is the one "who can have sex" yet we also see Jonny engaging in sex?) What about the other dead alters in the barn? What about Adam. It has been hinted at all season that Marlin was not the first - the existence of Adam before Marlin would indicate that Danny had already experienced something that caused his psyche to split. we know nothing about dad. we still know nothing about Adam!!!!!!! Are we ever getting that resolution? Then what was the goddamn point? Why is there even a trial. Why have him commit a crime that's so toothless and that he's so obviously guilty of? Why structure this around a crime in the first place? Emmy Rossum has been severely underutilized, fuck, even Amanda Seyfried. Cannot believe they got Jason Isaacs to be in like. 17 minutes of this show. And once again, Tom Holland can have no lines and still be the most interesting character on screen. Can he go back to theatre, I'd love to see what he can do with a good script if this is what he can accomplish with a bad one.

I'm tired. This show had such potential, and it's tripping at the finish line. After taking four episodes to get started. Acting is great, cinematography has been good, but story? Writing? It's disappointing. I'm frustrated.

#weezly talks tcr #i'm gonna lose followers i can feel it #if you like this show then good for you! #not saying you can't!

[roberttchase]

Matt Casey definitely needs therapy.

If you were writing a fic or writing for the show (you'd be amazing) what would Matt discuss in therapy, what issues would be brought up, what would it bring up for Matt and what conclusions or suggestions would be made?

😭 that is such a nice compliment thank you ❤️❤️

This man would have SO much to unpack. Like going back allllll the way to season 1. His mother/family problems. Hallie dying. Andy dying. Shay dying. His friendship with Severide. His anger issues. Almost dying from a head injury. Getting kidnapped from a strip club and watching Katya get killed in front of him. Almost dying in fires multiple times. That one candidate who committed s*icide. Gabby in fucking general and the way she treated him. The way he needs to please everyone and how he pushes his own feelings down (ie that one ep where that kid dies but gabby won’t let him talk and they go to her parents anniversary thing), the miscarriage, Louie. Gabby leaving. The weight of being a captain. It being being his fault Sylvie got hurt. Otis dying. Trying to fill a void with Naomi. His fucking apartment burning down. Almost having his brains blasted out. Almost having to deal with his best friend and squad drowning. Falling off the truck ladder and hanging to his death. Falling in love again. Another head injury. Sylvie bringing up Gabby. Leaving Chicago. Sylvie breaking up with him.

The amount of shit that has happened to Matthew Casey is literally astronomical. It’s Supernatural level of ridiculousness.

I think that love would be talked a lot about, and self worth, self image, confidence. I think that he values himself very little and thinks that his life matters less than everyone else’s.

I think his therapist would def be telling his doctor to put him on some meds bc hell yeah meds are good and not bad! I feel like he has little affirmations he has to repeat over and over, and he needs to learn how to be happy and be happy alone.

#Matt Casey #asks #brettsey #thoughts

[turtlesocksv2]

Kinnporsche Rewatch Episode 6 thoughts

Don't understand why Kinn and Porsche just...didn't stay with the truck. the badguys were dead/incapacitated and they saw the rescue team like right behind them? Whatever, it so that we get a whole episode of them handcuffed together in the wilderness and I respect it.

Chan is very worried. If this was part of Korn's plan, Chan was not informed!

I have so many fucking feelings about Kinn wanting to be a singer, and winning competitions that he wasn't sure if he deserved to win or if his dad pulled the strings so he stopped and then Tankhun got kidnapped and Kinn had to put the dream aside anyway and then fucking Kim goes and becomes a successful youtube musician or whatever away from the family and gets to do what Kinn dreamed of doing. And Kinn is just stuck, because Tankhun is still crazy and someone has to do it and he's been doing it so long anyway so what does it even matter anymore? I bet Mama Theerapanyakul was a musical kind of lady.

Relatedly, Kinn secretly wondering if Tankhun is faking it is so heartbreaking. Because he's not, and Kinn does know that, but ALSO Tankhun remains smarter and sharper than people realize, he's not actually as broken as he's portrayed to be, but it's better for everyone except Kinn if he is. Korn gets a proper heir, Tankhun gets to be safe and not have to deal with the mafia shit. Lots to unpack here.

This episode we really see the kinder, softer version of Kinn that was who he was before before he had to step up and bury it under the mafia prince exterior. It makes total sense that Porsche really falls for him here, after all the last couple episodes where he's been hit by the Clue By Four. Kinn and Porsche should just run away together. i bet they'd be able to get out of the country before Korn caught them.

I totally missed on the first watch through that Porsche was hospitalized for months after his parents death. and like, we know that it wasn't really a car accident so...did he just have a breakdown? did someone physically hurt him after to make it look like he'd been in a car accident? both? What Is The Truth, Korn?

Kinn offers Porsche his freedom because he knows he's the worst thing for Porsche, he wants him to open that bar on the beach and be happy! far away from the danger, even if it means away from Kinn. Kinn's already had to sacrifice so much for the family so what's one more thing, the love of his life, really?

Vegas and Macau fucking with Pete is so funny, i have to know what that CVS shopping trip was like. "I'm gonna buy some condoms and freak out Kinn's bodyguard that's tailing us." "Gross, bro. but also hilarious."

Someone please make a gifset of the Kinnporsche Ep 6/VegasPete ep 14 parallels.

#kprewatch2023 #kinnporsche

[pinazee]

Weekend warriors is one of my fave episodes for a multitude of reasons

The way Shawn flirts with Sally Reynolds at the briefing was fantastic. Shes such a memorable one off character and she doesn’t really do much. I credit that to Clair Coffee and her dazzling smile.

One of the best moments of Shawn showing just how amazing his memory is, and the little montage was wonderfully set up. But Gus really shouldn’t be surprised by now. Out of everyone (except maybe his dad) he should be the least amazed by his gifts.

It has my favorite most stupidest joke i still laugh at to this day actually ive been promoted. Its Captain Crunch now.

I have a deep appreciation of this show for never shying away from the fact that Gus is black. It seems like a lot of 00’s shows simply avoided the topic altogether (if they even had a black main). Starting from the pilot when gus placed his hands on the dash when the cop pulled them over. It goes to show how important it is to collaborate with your actors, particularly if your writing room demographics don’t correlate with your acting talent.

The fuck are you talking about henry. It took him 4 months after he was born to smile at you and thats when you acknowledge him??? I mean, i think they both know thats crap, but still lol

Solid Juliet moment. I love that they showed she was scared, but was brave enough to continue. Too many shows try to do feminism by making their female characters not feel fear for some reason? Or like, they’re kind of crazy and seek it out. Idk. Its nice that shes allowed to be afraid and vulnerable. It makes her feel like a real person.

THIS!

That end scene is the saddest fucking thing ive ever seen, and might be the most heartbreaking little shawn moment in the series. Im going to word for word this because i need ppl to share in my awwws

Shawn: Gus, when we grow up, think ill ever be as cool as you?

Gus: You’re better at kickball

Shawn: Not what I asked

Gus: We talking about your dad again?

Shawn: mm-hmm

Gus: Come on dude, the guy respects you

Shawn: Not like he does you

Gus: I’m not his son. I mean, he might like me okay, but he loves you

Shawn: Did he say that?

Gus: No.

Shawn: Well then how can you be sure?

Gus: You mean he’s never said it?

Shawn: Come on Gus, we’re guys.

SO MUCH TO UNPACK HERE but i’m going to do that in my henry analysis ep. Theres just too much to say.

#im really trying not to let these get too long #but i love this ep so it was a special occasion #im just waiting for the perfect opportunity to talk about henry #but im definitely keeping tabs on all the fucked up shit hes doing or teaching him haha #psych #psych rewatch #shawn spencer #james roday rodriguez #james roday #burton guster #dulé hill #dule hill #shawn and gus #juliet o'hara #maggie lawson