a butterfly with broken wings
mirages and hidden scars, the mirror sings
a vision, a nightmare, a lie made of all things
had me smothered, on the verge of a real beginning
the truth stood dim and silent, as if unaware
as if when touched, it would burn me with a flare
so there i stood, in an eternal glare
at myself, the disfigured figure that stood there
right there, chained with fear and despair
inside the mirror, a sight to step by, and beware
stuck in this back and forth, hope silently bled
pride dropped the last of tears it was meant to shed
losses became the gains, with the all the pain, the fire to be fed
a shimmering streak of light struck as hope died, slain
as fear, when all is lost, lost it’s glorious reign
a piece of a soul lost, but it’s demise not in vain
as rebellion stood now where there was horror, and disdain
Now, my circles are limited a few.
This year was hard for everyone but I have learned so much in it. I have learned who needs to stay in my life and who doesn’t. I learned to cherish the smallest moments and not take advantage of so many things, so many places, so many moments, so many feelings. I learned to how important I am and how gentle I need to be because in moments like this, no one will be here for me like I am here for me. I learned to love myself. I learned to look at life with sparkling eyes and live as if every day is my last day. I hope 2020 taught you something too and 2021 is a better year❤️
Rumi wrote, “Where there is ruin, there is hope for a treasure.” And it was in your beautiful ruins, that I have found my treasure.
Music by Ghostly Kisses
Your biggest supporter is a stranger. Your biggest hater is someone you know.
My thoughts of you, like food, are nourishment,
Like showers irrigating fields and ditches;
I strive and fret to make your life content,
Much like a penny-pincher hoards his riches:
Straight off, he’s tickled pink, then instantly
He’s anxious someone’s going to pinch his treasure;
Some days I hope it’s only you and me,
While other days I want to flaunt my pleasure.
At times, I feel we get overimmersed,
But soon after, I crave your sight anew;
I get no fun from what I have or thirst,
Except for what I have or take from you.
I either pine or gorge throughout the day;
I feast on you then starve when you’re away.
Shakespeare’s Sonnets, Retold
William Shakespeare and James Anthony
Hi, I’m soft and gay so I’ve decided to write poetry about the way my three fighters love because I can’t draw
Sit in silence with the blood.
It falls off your knuckles,
A slow and excruciating pace.
You know he will be here soon.
Here to see the mess you made,
The wreck you caused.
And he will not judge.
You will hide in his warmth.
Curl into those loving hands
And lean into the touch
That will soothe the last of
A n g e r.
You will hold him
When he is meek and crying
And see him in one of the times
He seems so
s m a l l.
It is trust you don’t understand.
And you will bask in it.
It is soothing,
This warm feeling.
And you will learn how to care.
But until then,
Place your hands
On their sturdy frame
The voices lied
Their is no malice in your bones
And they are not afraid
They have been waiting all day
For your return
And have been watching you
Praying you get over your fear.
You’ve always been obsessed.
You were made to care
And you made it your life’s work
So much so that you forget
The divinity of touch
The hand on your jaw is warm
Inviting as they tip your head
And you bask in it
The gentle adoration
Of flesh you have grown to hate
But soon you will begin to itch
And you will insist
They have done enough
And you will begin your care
All over again
15-1-2021, “… a Shakespearean sonnet.”
Her eyes were as beautiful as the sky,
They were amazingly high,
They were brownish-blue and full of joy,
They were shiny, watery not dry,
I was lost in them, I don’t know why,
I felt like they were talking to me and I could reply.
Her eyes were as beautiful as the sky,
I can cross my heart and hope to die,
They were charming, swear by,
She herself was so beautiful,
She was the apple of my eye,
I saw her getting high in the sky to pop and fly,
After a while, she bid me a goodbye.
Imagination is more important than knowledge.
Crawling through veins to being second choice - ishani.
No longer will I let you place her on a pedestal - that I am am your second choice when she hurts you.
You’ve ruined me, you’ve hurt me again and again when you choose her again and again.
But I let you crawl through my veins and break into my heart at every shot I have at being first over her.
Yet you always think over her when you’re with me. And let me tell you - second’s not the same.
Raspberry kisses and Clementine rosé - ishani.
I wish that I can be with you - in your arms and in your safety - so close that I can smell home.
A home I built from your soul and your heart - and when I am with you I find a house of unbridled love.
We can eat raspberries and clementines whilst we sip on rosé or gin.
And then when you kiss me - you’re mixed with the taste of raspberry sugar and clementine rosé.
An ode to my loneliness - ishani.
I wonder what it is like to be in love.
Is is how it is in the movies making it out that suddenly everything is yellow and not blue - and it doesn’t rain?
Or is it painful - is it worthy of tears or are all boys stupid?
Is love a never ending honeymoon of sickly smiles or is it a cause of lost laughs?
Because since you’ve disappeared I haven’t laughed or smiled. Instead I have cried and I have screamed.
“All boys are stupid” says she - but I can’t help but write an ode to my loneliness.
One of the happiest moments in life is when you find the courage to let go of what you can’t change.
You’re not my homeland anymore, so what am I defending now?
i pack up my troubles in a suitcase
and you’re the little square photograph
i stashed lovingly
inside a hidden pocket seen in the lining
a reminder of all the places i’ve been
and one home to come back to
Let’s get naked without taking our clothes off. Let’s get tangled in our bare souls.