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#lovely war is such a raw emotion
wingsmadeforflying · 7 months
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I am in love. With high tension Marauders. Like, they ask love each other. But also they're teenage boys with raging hormones and need to scream and punch walls. Just senseless fights and screaming matches for the sake of releasing tension.
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banditomojado · 8 months
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Dialogue from The Reckoning God of War Ragnorak mission
*Spoilers*
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Is it done?
It's over. It's.. really over.
And now that you have what you seek?
I suppose... This is the point where I forgive you. Or I kill you..
Have you decided?
To be honest, I don't think I can do either. There is still a part of me that is so.. Angry. And it will always be! It will always be angry! But no, you are not the one that needs to die. I do see that.
Look, everything that's happened between us...
No need to explain. Not to me. Not for that. I do not regret saving your life and never will. But the choice between life or death should have been yours to make. I should not have robbed you of that choice..
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pastellmochi · 2 years
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i need to talk about tomorrow netflix or i will explode (spoilers for episode six in the tags)
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The Iliad in 1967
(drabbles of an idea)
This piece is dedicated to the Goddess Aphrodite-
In this story, she is 19, and she is unbearably beautiful.
MAKE LOVE NOT WAR
"But.. what if they really are a danger?"
"Oh come now Patroclus, you're much smarter than that."
"I mean, I was against the war on Troy even back then because I thought the cause was stupid, but what if they have a legitimate reason this time?"
"A legitimate - there is NEVER a legitimate reason."
"I only mean that if there were genuine evil in this world, I would be willing to fight in a war against it."
"Of course you would. But here, your boyfriend, the love of your life, is going to evade the draft and go out to the streets to protest, what are you going to do now?"
"Of course, I will join him, then. Without hesitation."
"Good boy, Pari- I mean, Patroclus."
Achilles is antiwar now because he's seen through all the bs. Took him long enough. One lifetime in fact.
None of the Trojans are here in the story, (because Troy ISN'T REAL, ATHENS!) but they haunt them. Achilles sees Hector's ghost in the mirror. He is the one besieged now. Troy isn't real. Vietnam isn't real, Uncle Sam! He is under siege. The whole nation is under siege. Achilles cannot escape. Achilles cannot escape. Achilles goes out to the streets.
And then of course Patroclus dies in the protests because it's the fucking Iliad
His family had already disowned him for running off long ago. There was no official funeral.
Finally, Achilles dies trying to raise an insurrection against the US government.
On the streets of the city, a boy with flaming red hair bleeds to his death from a bullet wound in his stomach.
He was not able to stop the war, or to save either one of them.
He was not a hero.
There is screaming around him. Sobbing. It sounds familiar.
The sky is darkening. In an adjacent street, the gods of love and war walk hand in hand among the protestors. A couple of blocks down, Apollo and Dionysus hold a concert. Somewhere out there, in a better place perhaps, a beautiful young man named Paris chooses Love again and again for all the pain it wrought.
Achilles finds he is comforted by the thought.
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magicianparrish · 2 years
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Obi-Wan’s finale really hurt my feelings didn’t it 😭
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blingblong55 · 4 months
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No Judgement- Simon "Ghost" Riley
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---- F!Reader, fluff, dad!Ghost, husband!Ghost, mentions of dad-bod!Ghost ----
A/N: I've been having baby fever for about a week now and recently saw a tiktok and…it made me emotional for some reason so…here's this piece I wrote
Simon was the man who saw himself living in war and dying in it and then you came into his life. For some reason only he knows, he found himself being more careful during missions. Before you, he would rush into a room without care and now, he is more cautious. All because he wants to make it home, to a warm and cosy house. To your arms and loving kisses and to those three kids he swears he'll forever love.
You dated him for 2 years before he knew that you were it for him. Two years and five months, that is what took him to get on his knee and ask you to marry him. Oh if only Tommy was here to see this, that laugh he would have. Before you, Simon didn't show much emotions, besides anger or that cold and rude one he presented himself with. Now, all he can do is talk and talk about all he feels and most of the time, he shows that love and raw emotion through actions.
He didn't cry before you either, except for when his family died but when he saw you walk down the aisle, he couldn't contain the tears. Soap patted his back without judgement for he knew the girl walking to the groom was the one who made the crying groom's heart beat once again. Three years into the marriage, you become pregnant with your first child, a son and oh was Simon delighted.
He was prepared for it all, took courses, read books and made sure the home was baby proof of course, you took the role of being the princess, not a finger lift from you or he would pretend to get upset at it. He needed to protect you, even from the corners of the table, which he of course made sure were ready in case you or the kid would bump into them.
One baby and a puppy later, Simon Riley was a father and for the first two years, he took leave from the military and focused on you and the baby. His eyes are like his father and his energy is just like his. There were days when Simon cried, from sadness and happiness. For one, he was sad his mother didn't get to meet his son and he was happy that for the first time in so long, he knew what a family was like. Lazy Saturdays and Sundays, laying under a tree in the back yard, the grass all nice and soft so the baby would learn to crawl and eventually walk. The puppy watching with the guard, just in case the baby fell.
Simon was always there, for motivation, protection and love. He wanted to ensure that he wouldn't fuck up with this life of his. Soon enough though, he went back to work but he made sure to always have his family in mind. The giggles, the lullabies, smiles and that sweet emotion he had when he watched you and his son. It was bittersweet but so beautiful.
The birth of your second son came as no surprise when Simon once walked to you, shirtless and holding his son with one arm. For some reason that sight alone provoked you to want a second child, which as the loving husband Simon is, he obliged. Nearly ten months and he was by your side, holding your hand, letting you grip it and cry as your second little one came into the world. That cute nose and that smile, what a delight to be a mother to a whole new little light of life.
The holidays became more chaotic as the two boys grew up. Simon slowly left the military, doing fewer missions and being home more often. He began to grow a soft tummy and muscles, something he grew to be insecure about but with plenty of hours of cuddling one night and many kisses that included sweet nothings to his ear, he loved this new him. He wasn't his father but rather the best dad those two little monsters could ever ask for. His beard grew a little and you began to love this sight of him, it was beautiful really. So much so, that one day, as he was doing push-ups with his sons on his back and how they giggled, you teared up.
Making a home was easy but making a happy family was hard and rewarding. Before you knew it, Simon was carrying the kids around the living room, letting them beat him in a playful game of fighting and tag. The giggles around the house, the way Simon smiled like he had entered heaven, that is what made you tear up the most. This is home.
During the holidays, Simon gets so excited that he overdoes it all. He dresses like Santa Claus, eats the biscuits, drinks milk and even gets a treat from the woman of the house. A sneaky little kiss before Santa has to leave for other homes. "I've heard the woman who lives here is the most beautiful, maybe she'll kiss me as a little treat?" He smiles, pleading with those eyes of his. And who could you be to deny him of a sweet kiss?
For the first 5 years of being a proud dad to his two sons, Simon would wear matching outfits with them. It was sweet, watching him get excited like a child, trying to dress his sons up and take them for a walk.
There is one thing he was always making sure would be a rule at home and that is how they treated you. No son of his would be discarding a woman, no son of his would be disrespectful and no son of his would not see how much it takes being a mum and one who works and keeps a home clean and steady. And you bet he taught his sons how to clean and cook later in life.
One warm Spring day came in when you told him the news. Baby number three would be on her merry way. Just like before but with some slight changes, he spoke to your belly. He kissed it, read to it and told his jokes to it. His warm hands are placed on your soft belly when he looks up at you, "Thank you," his eyes are watery and you tilt your head just a bit. "For what?" you ask.
"For giving me a family, for making a home with me. Lovie, before you, I was truly nothing, just a man in a borrowed body and now, I have reason to own this old body of mine. I'm a husband and a dad, I love you," he kisses you and then your belly.
After the birth of your daughter, he like your two sons carried her in a camouflage carrier. A pink bow is one of the little patches. 'Baby girl Riley' is one of those patches as well.
As time went on, he transformed into a retired military officer. Now, he is a full-time dad. Night shifts and diaper changes were his duty as well as your comfort. With more time, he had a softer tummy, his dad bod making him insecure some days but as always, you were there to reassure him it was normal and it was beautiful.
There have been moments when you catch yourself being mesmerised by him.
For instance, when he plays dolls with your daughter or he gets into his role of the cashier when playing grocery. His sass when your daughter doesn't hurry up paying with her card or cash and how he calls her sweetheart any time she pays. There was one time when you saw him sat down on the sofa, watching telly all as your daughter did his makeup, hair and how she gossips with him and he gossips back. By the end of the day, he asks you to undo the tiny rubber bands from his hair.
Before he retired, you found him sitting by his desk, toys all over it as he wrote a report, played and gave his attention to his sons and this was because you were tired and he wanted to give you extra hours of sleep.
He became a football coach for your son's team, every Saturday he was on that field, whistling and shouting for when they make a goal. Of course, you and your daughter sat on the bleachers, eating snacks and cheering for the young footballer of your son. Simon of course would have dark cargo jeans and in most pockets, he had snacks for all his kids. "Daddy, mummy says you have my gummies," his youngest son would softly say and Simon would just pat his bottom pocket and his son would soon take out his gummies.
As his daughter grows old, it's his dad duty to not allow his daughter to date some idiot so, he makes sure to take her on dates, bring her flowers and make her understand how a man should treat her. When he and his two sons go to a different city for some sporting event, he comes back with two bouquets, one for you and one for his princess.
Since he didn't have a stable childhood, Simon, during winter buys everyone matching pyjamas. It just makes things 110% better in his opinion and who can deny a man with easy needs such a cute need? Never you, certainly.
By the time he reaches forty-three, Simon has his entire camera roll filled with pictures of his beautiful family and the occasional picture of a bird he thinks the kids would like to see.
Now, as you lay in bed with him, he turns to you, "I think I have lived this life to its fullest, lovie," he smiles and caresses your face. "Hm, yeah?" you lean into his touch and he nods like a little kid. "I mean, I have three amazing monsters, I am getting to see past thirty and I have always wanted a hot and funny wife, so I know for a fact that I have lived the best of it," he kisses your hand and holds it as he falls asleep.
A/N: Sometimes, I want a husband, a picket fence and lazy weekends with our kids bursting through the door in the morning and feeling like I made it in life…anyway…bye!
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undercoverpena · 1 year
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had to see you
simon 'ghost' riley x fem!reader
summary: And then, he says, “It’s nice.” “You can tell me if it isn’t, I promise I won’t be offended—it’s not as though I cook often.” “It is nice,” he repeats, giving you a look which tells you to stop worrying as if you have any control over your feelings.
an: eventual smut. angst with happy ending. will-they-won't-they, but they do. smut. he loves you 100%. word count: 5.7k || there’s a part two to this here
simon ghost riley masterlist
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You love the rain. 
Not so much when you’re away. When you’re strapped up, weighed down by all your gear. The additional weight of being wet makes for an uncomfortable experience, with hair clinging to foreheads and mud sticking to your skin. It also forces things to rub more, chaff. Your skin is often raw from where the buckles and belts sit. 
But, at home, it’s refreshing. 
It’s why you never hated your nickname, the one given to you in jest—to remind you that you are a female, soft, emotional. Only for it to grow more fitting. Because Rain comes from above, sharp, falling where needed—catching people by surprise, and leaving traces behind, but never enough to know where you’ll land next. 
Rain is also one word. One syllable. Short, sharp and easy.
It can be spat, it can be sweetly said and affectionately called. 
On good days, it reminds you of long car rides, staring out of windows at passing traffic as you watch beads of its travel down—racing. On bad days, it reminds you of more unpleasant memories, ones born in moments you’d sooner forget, an emptiness in your chest from betrayal, loss and bad choices. 
At home, rain itself keeps you rooted. The scent, for one, not allowing your mind to whisk you off too old memories of war and enemy territories. The sound, for another, hits your windows and dulls the silence. All three senses are busied by it. It all blends perfectly together with the crackling of your candles and the low-light vibe you have going off in your flat. 
Plus, there’s nothing more British than bad weather. 
Each time you’re able to come home, you hope it’s raining. Landing back, greeted with cold and horrid rain. Preferably the kind which looks misty through windows and soaks you in seconds when you step into it. The kind which makes it hard to know which speed to put your car wipers on, and socks get drenched as puddles form quicker than people can account for.
You didn’t care that you looked like a drowned rat when you unlocked your flat door. Or that your wet clothes were difficult to remove as steam filled your bathroom because you were always going to have a shower. A routine—a tradition of sorts. 
Hands desperate to wash the months away, let your expensive soaps and scents soak into neglected skin and smother old scars and newly gained ones. Plus, the water was hotter at home, almost scolding your skin as you stood under it, letting each droplet massage a part of your neck and upper back as your living room music drifted through the cracked door.
You dress before you really prune, sliding on silk PJs—the ones which you buy as a treat and wear once, maybe twice a year. Your skin sighs in relief, thankful to forget sand, bullets and bruises, the same as your mind. Busying your hands with preparing a lavish dinner, a large dish too ridiculous for one person—but again, you’d missed it. Home.
The scent of gravy, potatoes and meat.
When asked, you’d been quiet about your plans with the others. Them only having a slight idea of which city you call home. It’s not that you didn’t want to see them—not even sure you’d be able to fall asleep without Soap’s snores, Ghost’s huffs and Gaz’s odd bedtime stories. But, you’d gained new nightmares on the last job—ones which you needed to make peace with before they stole another fraction of your soul.
That’s what it did, eventually. Even to the best of them. 
Bad choices, untested intel and wrong moves left little marks before they claimed a piece of innocence, kindness and happiness. 
It’s a little different with the 141. Without realising it, you’re sure you all help smother each other's struggles away. But it’s only temporary. You know it, you can feel it in the muscles in your back and in the knots in your stomach. So, if you saw them now when you needed to heal—if you relied on them—you’d go back weaker than when you left. And they needed you; you needed them. A team where you could only trust one another—having been betrayed so often, you were all each other had.
It’s why you were taken back by a firm knock. 
Short. Deliberate. 
Pausing, allowing whoever they were to realise their mistake. Even if the sound didn’t appear as though they’d chosen the wrong flat or someone who was cherry-knocking. It was purposeful, direct, and your hands quickly dried on the kitchen towel as your feet crossed the tiles and laminate to your front door. 
When you’d left, you’d asked a friend to check in on the flat—fix the peephole. Something having forced it to get stuck, leaving you blind to whoever was on the other side. Your friend is good, kind, and sweet but forgetful. Something which also reminds you of home as you snort, undoing the chain, and unlocking the door, half expecting them. 
Only to see him. 
“Ghost?” 
He has a hood up, and a scarf wrapped around the lower part of his face. 
His eyes fall over you, taking you in centimetre by centimetre, digging into you as if he’d not expected to see you.
You find it just as odd to see the skin around his eyes not tainted in grey or black and that his frame is still as ridiculously large, even in plain clothes, as he holds a duffel bag in his hand.
Suddenly aware of the thin layer covering your body from him. Especially as his eyes drop from your face to the silk shirt with its three buttons undone and then to your legs, where silk shorts did their best but were futile in hiding thighs, knees or legs from him.  
“You lettin’ me in?” 
Instinctively, you move, not even questioning it. 
Even if he didn’t say it like an order, he was still your lieutenant. Even on home ground, you slipped into your sergeant role too quickly. Watching him pass you, turning to face the direction he moves in before pressing your back against the inside of your door. Fingers sliding to the side of you, turning the lock, the sound filling the small space as you watch him stop at your key hook, slowly sliding his feet from his boots—finding him wearing thick, bobbly socks. 
He turns to face you, eyes washing over you again as his hood remains up as he undoes the scarf. It doesn’t matter if you’ve seen his face a handful of times, each time, it still renders you silent, if only for a second. 
Clearing your throat, you rub the back of your neck. “I don’t mean this to come out as rude, but why are you—“
“Someone broke into my place.” 
You move, almost too quickly, from the door. Your hand brushing his shoulder, wanting—needing—to comfort him, soothe him like you would a friend. Before you remembered who this was. 
Almost surprised he doesn’t flinch. Even if he does shoot you a surprised look before you wrench your hand back. 
“S-sorry. Habit.” He frowns, and you wish the floor would swallow you whole. “Not with y—when I’m home, I’m… well, I—did they take anything?” 
“Not sure.” 
Right. “Do you need somewhere to stay?” 
He looks at you briefly before his eyes flick away, the tell-tale signs of him processing and thinking. You’ve seen him do it often, especially when Price is talking and when he reads files. As if he’s choosing where to store it in the filing cabinet, he calls his brain. 
“Please,” he says, the word almost coming out as a whisper. 
As if it’s so rarely ever said. 
You’re unsure what to say, even if there’s so much swirling around your brain. So many questions you want to pepper him with, but he’s not Soap, who’ll answer them all or Gaz, who’ll have already told you everything. 
He’s Ghost. 
Silent. Quiet, Ghost. 
Your oven beeps, his head turning to the sound. 
Sighing, you rub your arms, suddenly aware of how cold your hallway feels, as you cover your chest with your elbows. “You hungry?” 
Silence. 
A beat or two blossoming, your eyes unable to move from his face, even if you know you should, before he licks his lips, saying, “Starving.” 
You smile, “Good. It's not a lot, just some chicken, potatoes… a bit of veg. Nothing huge. And, not quite a typical Sunday roast, but enough to ease me back in.” 
He doesn’t laugh, not that you expect him to. 
“Bathroom is there, to your right. If you need it,” you say quickly, almost stepping past him to answer your beeping oven. “I just need to dish up, and… yeah.” 
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You expect to feel calmer by the time he’s back. Especially with your dressing gown on, loosely knotted at your waist, covering more of you from him. 
But you’re more nervous. 
Doubting the food you’ve plated, the scent of the candles, whether the low lights make it romantic and whether you should turn up the acoustic songs playing or let the rain be the soundtrack of the evening. Suddenly aware of how fucking odd this is. 
Him being here. 
And yet, not that odd at all. 
“Hope it’s okay…” you mumble nervously as you place the plate down.
He looks like he belongs at your table, even if your table is small and usually for one-person. He’d helped, in as much of a way as a stranger can in someone’s home, grabbing glasses from cupboards you direct him to, making squash for you and water for him. 
His hands stuffed into the pocket of his hoodie as he waited for further instruction, catching sight of the hood still being up, having noticed he’d swapped jeans for dark joggers before you told him to sit. 
“There’s more gravy… just wasn’t sure how you liked it,” you add. 
Ghost doesn’t answer, not even as you slide into the chair opposite. Your hands have a slight tremble to them as you pick up your cutlery, trying not to watch him take a bite—suddenly feeling like a contestant on a judging show. 
And then, he says, “It’s nice.” 
“You can tell me if it isn’t, I promise I won’t be offended—it’s not as though I cook often.”
“It is nice,” he repeats, giving you a look which tells you to stop worrying as if you have any control over your feelings.
The two of you fall into a comfortable silence, the occasional sound of a fork grazing the plate and the knife slicing through food. It’s almost normal—as though this happens regularly. 
“Your place is nice, too,” he mumbles.  
Lifting your head, you find he’s looking at you already. “You don’t have to lie, Simon. You can still stay even if you think my decor is odd.” 
His eyes widen a fraction before it vanishes like it never existed. A brief moment of you wondering why, until you realise the slip—the way you used his name and not his alias. Making it feel personal. More so than the two of your knees occasionally butting under the table. 
“It’s not what I expected.” 
“You’ve thought about my place?” 
Ghost says nothing, hovering his fork over his dinner as he keeps his eyes down. 
You smile if only to yourself, pushing some meat and vegetables onto your fork, continuing—wondering if he’s hoping you would. That silence would settle over the two of you, the storm outside being enough background noise to keep it from being awkward. 
“I have to ask,” you say suddenly, keeping your gaze down, trying to still your pulse as you manoeuvre food around the sauce. “Why me? I mean… I don’t mind you being here, but I thought, well, I assumed you’d pick Soap—if you needed a place to stay.”
You try not to look, even when you hear a faint snort, seeing his plate—empty, only traces of broccoli stalks remaining—slide closer as the chair creaks in his movement. 
“You were closer.” 
Oh. 
Your stomach drops, suddenly feeling foolish for thinking there could be any other reason. 
Almost wanting to kick yourself for allowing yourself to consider another option, one which you’ve been stuffing down for weeks, months… 
It isn’t as though you were meant to fall for him. The man who originally kept his face a higher guarded secret than his own name. But, it stemmed naturally and out of nowhere. He made you laugh as you moved into an enemy building—nerves humming in your bones. He made it worse when he flung himself in front of you before a car exploded, gripping you tightly against him, not letting go for minutes later before his hand cupped your cheek, mouthing words you couldn’t hear as ears rang and rang.
Smiling, you nod, not sure what else to say as you take his plate and yours, turning your back to him as you hear him clear his throat. 
“I had to see if you were okay.” 
You don’t place the plates down, not immediately. 
Eyes trying to peer at him through the corner of your vision, slowly lowering the porcelain to the counter—too afraid to break the moment with a single sound, even as your heart hammered in your ears, in your chest, and throat. 
He had said it so softly, you have to wonder how long it’s been churning on his tongue. 
Slowly turning, you face him, finding his eyes already on you with an awkwardness in his shoulders as he looks up at you. 
“Well, I’m fine.” 
“Had to be sure.” 
You smile, pulling your dressing gown around you tighter. “Well, that’s because you’re a good lieutenant.” 
His brows knit, lips spreading into a thin light before you notice the subtle shift in his nostrils as though he’s sighed before Ghost nods with his usual professionalism. That’s when your stomach drops, fluttering ridiculously near your feet as you feel you’ve made a mistake.  
“Tea?” you ask. 
Ghost’s face shifts and you’re almost sure there’s a faint smile on his lips. 
“Don’t worry, I know how you like it,” you add, pulling open a cupboard as you retrieve two mugs and flick the kettle on. “I’ve heard you berate Soap for his piss-poor tea skills.”
You make him snort. 
And it does nothing to stifle the fluttering.
If anything, it adds to it. 
Shit. 
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Even though it’ll be his bed for the night, Ghost refuses to sit on the sofa and doesn’t allow you to sit in the armchair. Practically insisting you sit how you would if he wasn’t here. Even if you’re worried he won’t be comfortable, the ridiculous chair was bought as a filler—an accessory, rather than something people actually used.
“Fine,” you mumbled, grabbing your blanket and curling up across both seats as he clutched the mug in his hand. 
You put something crap on the TV, the volume low—just in case he doesn’t feel like talking. Your eyes flick to it occasionally, half-listening as you softly wiggle your toes under the blanket—needing something to focus on. Because you couldn’t keep looking at him. 
Not with how your mind was running away from you, imagining ifs and buts and everything else in between. 
He fits here. Your home rarely feels warm and comforting, but with his presence, it does. As though your place has always wanted to be enjoyed by two people, not one person who rarely ever visited it. 
It doesn’t feel weird, even if it should. It makes you feel unsteady, and dizzy. Suddenly unable to stop focusing on the fact there’s a six-foot-something amount of feelings in your chest, twisting and tightening, trying to unlock everything you stuffed down. 
That same instinct and set of emotions which made you try to rip yourself from Soap’s grip when Ghost had entered a blazing building just for a stupid USB; how you’d been so angry, feral—as Soap called it—not able to think, how it had filled you, consuming you. How you’d even told Price you needed benching, unable to even look at your lieutenant, never mind be in the same room. 
He eventually cornered you on the base, pushing you, mixing between berating and taunting you until you slammed your small fist into his shoulder as you called him an idiot, a fucking cunt, a liability, a heartless cunt. How your tiny fist hammered into him with each array of insults until he grasped it tenderly, staring at you until tears bubbled in your eyes. 
You cannot die.
Why?
But, he had to know. His eyes followed a single tear down your cheek as he released your wrist, allowing you to walk away from him and begin the process of stuffing everything down again. 
Then you’d been shot. Through and through. Fire, gasp and fucking pain, your mind rendered uselessly, but he was still the person you called for. Not Soap, who was closer, not Gaz, who could actually stitch you. But Ghost. 
Ghost who came in a flash, telling you what you needed to hear—ordering you to do things like look at him, gripping his arm. 
“What?” 
Blinking, you didn’t even realise you’d been looking at him. Your mind blanking excuses tumbling from your grasp as you offer the quickest smile and a ‘nothing’. 
You forget how good he is at reading people. 
Especially you. Almost sure you make it easy for him, even if everyone else says they struggle. 
Ghost always knows, as though he’s in your head, digging his way through each time he stares at you. You wonder how much you let him in, whether he finds it easy before you want him in there—in your mind, in your heart. 
Now, he’s giving you a stern look, one which makes the truth rattle in your chest and snakes up your throat. 
Sighing, you shake your head. “Fine, I was thinking about how weirdly normal it is that you’re here. That it doesn’t feel weird, alright? That was it.” 
Anyone else, you’d think they’d smirk. 
But with him, it’s the slightest movement of his lip which tells you he has heard you. 
Ghost takes a sip, purposefully holding your gaze as he does so before filling the silence with, “You thought about it, then? Me being here.” 
“Of course I have,” you answer too quickly, wanting to kick yourself as the words hit the air, his brows raising as he sips his tea. “Not… Not like that.” 
“How then?” 
Shit. Swallowing, you sigh, trying to buy yourself time. Shit, bollocks, shit. 
“Should tell you, lying to your lieutenant isn’t smart.” 
You give him a sharp look of your own, and he snorts—actually snorts. Your eyes are all set to roll until he says your name. 
Your real name. 
Not your nickname. Not sergeant or soldier. 
“Fine. I’ve thought about it.”
“It?” 
You groan, pulling the blanket up further—not that it’ll hide the obvious warming of your cheeks or embarrassment. You’re sure that’s painted across the room, likely even doing a jig at your expense. 
“Us. You, me. In a bed,” you mumble. “Happy?” 
Wanting to hide your face, almost about to when the sound of his mug meeting your coaster makes you freeze. Your armchair—the one his frame has somehow fit into comfortably—groans as he moves, and you let yourself see him from the corner of your eye. His forearms leaning on his knees, his hand sliding his hood down as he watches you. 
He’s silent. 
So silent it almost kills you. The adverts in the background do nothing to stop it; the rain, now hammering against the windows, was not stifling it. 
Slowly breathing as you place your mug down, standing before you can even consider the options. “I didn’t realise how late it is,” you say, forcing a yawn. “I should… go to bed. Let you make your bed.” 
You fold the blanket, throwing it over the arm as you try to shrug, and play it off, but he’s quicker at recognising you—he knows you better than that. His hand comes to touch your wrist, like he did months ago, eyes scanning yours.
For what you’re not sure. 
Not wanting to get your hopes up. Not wanting to lose yourself in dreams and imagination. 
So, you smile. As sweetly and as believable as you can as you point to the coffee table chest. “Blankets, pillows, the lot are in there,” you say, almost breathlessly, as he releases you. “Have a nice sleep, Gh—Simon.” 
He swallows, his face remains unreadable as he chokes out, “You too.” 
But you’re already moving, desperately seeking your room—throwing the door open and shutting it as you place your back against it. She’s closing, chest hammering so hard you’re sure it’s trying to escape. 
Go back. 
Go back to him. 
Your eyes slowly open, catching sight of yourself in the mirror as the street lamps partially light your room.
He came to check on you. You. 
Rolling your neck, your fingers flex at your side, twisting your wrists, wanting to shake it all from you. Trying, desperately to rid yourself of the tension and adrenaline. Almost doing so until you hear the floorboards outside your door creak. 
It doubles your heart rate as a lump forms in your throat, suffocating you. You don’t want to give in, but wish to all at once. Your hand cupping your mouth, trying to hide the extra breaths the sound has forced you to make. Needing him. Wanting his calloused fingers to leave marks over your skin, his stubble to slice against your cheeks as his lips capture your breath, words and soul.  
It’s that which makes you shift from the door. Not sure what you’re expecting, what you’re going to see, as your hand twists the doorknob, coming face to face with him all over again. 
His hoodie is gone. 
Expression torn—that same awkwardness in his shoulders.
Your hallway light touches his unreadable expression, highlighting all the lines and shading of his tattoo that stand out against his skin. 
“Tell me to go back to your living room.” 
Inhaling sharply, your hand drops from your mouth and falls limply to your side. 
You are not thinking, thoughts all scattered, scrambled. Not even sure you can find words to tell him you want anything but. That you want him here, right in front of you; you want him to be rough and also kind, you want him to kiss you like he’ll never have the chance to again. 
As though reading you, he moves closer, not even touching you, but your body yearns for him, muscles tensing and spasming at the endless thoughts of what could be—what he could do, what you already know he’d be good at. Suddenly wanting to rid yourself of your dressing gown, of your PJs, of the thin lace between your thighs you’ve already ruined. 
“Words, sweetheart.” 
Sweetheart.
Your legs almost give way, a smile wanting to bloom and spread across your lips, up your cheeks until it's radiating from you. 
“Tell me. Or I’ll kiss you.” 
Speechless, your lips part. 
Yes. Please, yes. 
Not even sure you are even breathing as you imagine his hands on you, his mouth against yours, against your neck, descending down and down—
His hand cups your cheek, pulling your eyes to his as he examines you. He studies you like he’s capturing every fucking inch of you: the curve of your cheeks, the position of your brows, the way your lips are waiting for him. The clear crisis you’re going through is rendered and broken at the mere thought of this becoming a reality. 
“Simon…” you manage to whisper.
Hoping it's enough. Needing it to be enough. 
He blinks once more before he lowers his head, his lips planting against yours and you’re sure you explode. Your heart furiously beating, ears buzzing and burning all at once.
Barely focusing on the way his arm snakes around you as your mouth moves to meet each one of his movements. His lips are soft, even if his tongue is rough; his grip tight, purposeful—desperate, even if yours are gentle, nervous. The pads of your fingers slide past the healed scar on his cheek, moving into his hair, his groan vibrating against your lips. 
Gh—Simon is almost lifting you, moving you back as his foot kicks your bedroom door shut behind him, blocking out the light from the hallway. Only the streetlights dance shadows across your room as kisses grow messier, fingers brushing over skin as he hooks a finger in the waistband of your shorts, then sliding, freeing you, until you’re stepping out of them. Your robe next, falling with a thud as your hands slide under his t-shirt, feeling taut, hard muscle and silver scars which paint stories as your legs find your bed. 
He smells different than usual.
Less sweat and fireworks, and more some combination of Ghost meeting sandalwood and amber as the two of you bend down onto your bed, the frame hissing at the weight and movement—not even aware of what’ll be expected to support soon enough. 
“Shit, woman. Y’know how beautiful you are?” 
His teeth nipping, sucking, leaving an answer to your prayer before you feel him unbuttoning your top, all slow and gentle, as if undoing a present he’s waited desperately for. 
“Rip it,” you moan, his teeth grazing over the space between your breasts before he lifts up. 
His eyes burn into yours, the smallest evidence of a smirk on his mouth as he slowly shakes his head. “I’ve waited too fuckin’ long to get here, I’m takin’ my damn time.” 
If you weren’t already soaked for him, that did it. 
All slick, swollen and hungry for him. Not sure if it’ll even take much, not with how precise you can imagine him being—how fucking thick his fingers are, how he’s staring at you like he wants to break you in all the ways he can before sunrise.
And you want it. Desperate for it. So much so that just the fan of his warm breath against your exposed nipples makes you rub your thighs together, needing friction—something he can tell, he must do. 
“Wait.”
It’s sharp, authoritative, and he’s going to be the death of you. 
Your body is so tense, you’re sure it’ll snap if you keep any more still as he undoes the last button and exposes your skin to the cool air and his breath. So focused on his eyes, you’ve forgotten all about his hand until you feel lace dig into your waist, tightening and tightening—snap.
And he smirks.
The devious bastard smirks. 
Your lips part to make a remark—one you’re not even wholeheartedly sure will come out right—but it dies when he touches you, one finger, one thick calloused finger sliding between your thighs, brushing where you need him. 
“Fuck…”
“Part them, sweetheart.”
And you do.
You do it like he’s said open-fucking-sésame. Two fingers sliding against you, diving between your folds. It’s intense, teasing and everything all at once. It’s making you burn and shiver, sweat building on your brow as you pant and whimper. His name falls freely, almost chanting it, like a song you’re the only one who can sing it. He captures what he can, tasting each syllable you say of his name until you’re tightening and clenching, and he whispers in your ear how good you are, how perfect you are, and you meet your orgasm with blinding lights and arched back. 
The sight of him licking your want from his fingers brings you back, his mouth crashing against yours as you pull him down, knee bent against his hip as his hand comes to rest on your hip—the one you hope he’s bruising. Wanting, wishing for him to leave literal fingerprints as your hand slides between the two of you.
You knew before tonight Simon Riley would be big. 
Almost too big. 
The weight of him against your palm is something else, the thickness of his cock in between your fingers as you make him hiss, thumb swiping over the head as he groans. 
He mixes kissing and nipping at your neck depending on what your hand does, the groans of your name making you desperate—needing him inside you, suddenly empty and desperate all over again, but not for his fingers. 
You want him so deep in you you’ll forever feel empty without him. You want to feel every inch of him, want to rock against his hips as you press half-moons into his skin as nails dig into him. 
The ache growing, worsening as his tongue draws a line from your neck to your earlobe, his fist clenching around your bed sheets at your side. 
“Fuck… stop. Stop,” he groans, a hand smothering yours, halting you as he stares at you before pressing his forehead against yours. 
Letting him go, touching his cheek—his eyes full of lust, searing into you. 
“I want you.” 
“Yeah?”
You nod, his lips sliding up into a half-smirk—a Simon special. “I’ll go slow.”
“I hope you fucking don’t.”
His eyes harden. “I’m going slow. I’ll ruin you later,” he whispers darkly, before capturing your lips, a hand gripping the back of your thigh—shifting it just over his hip.
You're set to argue, and comment you can handle it until you feel him lineup, the head of his cock pushing against your folds. 
You gasp as his hips move forward, slowly pushing himself in, your nails digging into his shoulder, into his waist as shivers run down your spine. The stretch being both too much and everything all at once, your toes curling, him slowly burying his cock all the way in as his fingers stroke your jaw.  
“So fu—tight. Fuckin'-shit, sweetheart.” 
“Simon…” 
Your hips roll, moaning at the way it feels, having never felt so full. Never felt so stretched. 
He’s slow, as he has been since he stepped over the threshold. His determination to take things slow, to take his time, not lessening now that he’s deep inside of you. 
You’re sure you’ve left an array of welts and half-moon marks into his shoulders as he begins to roll his hips, his thrusts purposeful, desperately seeking that spot he already knows. 
“Eyes on me,” he says, thumb against your jaw as your eyes lashes beg to flutter, but land on him all the same. “There’s my girl.” 
It’s sinful the moan you let escape at his praise, your legs almost jelly as he steals it with a kiss—as though to taste it. Your mouth grasping for him when he pulls his head back, gripping your hip, helping you both to find a steady pace.
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He does ruin you.
Not the first time, the second, but on the third.
Legs so sore, boneless and aching you can barely walk without his aid to the bathroom. 
You’re not surprised he places you down on the side of the bath, taking a cloth you point him to as he cleans between your thighs as your hisses feel the space. You catch sight of yourself, an array of colours developing across your neck, collarbone and waist—just like you wanted.
A painting in colours of his own design. 
You expect awkwardness once you shuffle back, giving him a moment. Finding underwear, sliding it over shaky legs before surrendering the idea of PJs as you slid between your duvet and sheets. When he returns, you brace for regret—for words you wish he’d swallow, face hidden in the scarf or behind a mask, but he’s in boxers and shuts your door with care. 
Simon crosses the room, lifting the duvet as he slides in next to you, reaching out, tugging your back to his chest as he places a single kiss on the space below your earlobe. 
You want to tell him everything. That you like him, could even love him by now. That you look for him too, that you worry, that you care. You'd tell him that he has pierced your heart, and you welcome the sting, that you'd be there, whenever he needed it. Even with knowing he likes space and distance and everything else in between.
"Stop thinkin' so loud," he grumbles against your skin.
Smiling, you fix your eyes across the darkness, finding the outline of your dresser as his hand finds your hip. Whether to soothe you or silence you, it makes your hands clammy.
Unsure if he knows that someone loves him. Someone wants him alive, wants him uninjured.
“I have feelings for you…” you whisper, fixing your eyes on your dresser as you swallow. “In case it wasn’t obvious.” 
He doesn’t tense, doesn’t move. 
Blinking, you try to trace the shapes of your handles, keeping your mind busy, the silence building and building. 
"Say that again." You turn your head, meeting his stare, watching as he raises his knuckles before he traces your cheekbone. "Please."
His touch is so gentle, so soft that it makes your heart swell—your face relaxing as you repeat it again. "I have feelings for you.
"I care about you and...I like you alive, Simon."
You don't expect a reply, a declaration of his own. The fact he hasn't moved and hasn't pulled his knuckles from stroking your cheek, is enough of a declaration. Your lips turn, meeting them, pressing the softest kiss to them as if saying I know, I don't need to hear it. I know.
Letting your eyes ensure the message lands as you hold his gaze, ever-so-slightly nodding.
“I texted him. Johnny," he says. His fingers spread, cupping your cheek, thumb stroking your cheek. “But, I had to see you. Had to be sure.” 
Your eyes lower briefly, feeling your heart almost stammer at his words. “Because I’m your sergeant or because I’m your girl.” 
You’re my girl. Mine. Fuck, you’re mine. Mine. All mine. You hear me, sweetheart? 
His thumb pauses against your cheek, likely remembering the same words he chanted over and over as he fucked you senseless. His eyes narrow ever so slightly as his lips twitch, and yours try not to smile.
“The latter.” 
You nod. Feeling your body flush with warmth, turning your head back away from him, grinning as he pulls you flush against him.
Your heart thumping mine, mine, mine. Hearing him get comfortable against the pillow, a soft sigh blowing past his lips and kissing your skin.
“You make shit tea, though.” 
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read part two
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a huge thank you to @ghostaholics for this absolutely gorgeous graphic. I can’t believe how much it encapsulates the entire piece and is just so me, and so pretty. thank you so much, I appreciate it so much 💕!
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ode2rin · 8 months
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it has become an awful pattern of habit how much itoshi sae always shows up at your doorstep only when he wants to. 
“don’t go out with oliver.”
and here he was again, like a recurring relapse that happens every single time you thought you’re doing better. the kind that hits when you think you're finally making progress, that momentary flicker of doing better before it all crumbles.
and you were. you’re doing good, doing better, but god, does it hurt like hell when he pulls stunts like this.
it was a relentless tug-of-war, a game he played so unfairly, leaving you with no rules, no defenses. you were damn sick of it. 
“really?” the word escaped as a scoff, a blend of disbelief and irritation coating your voice. “you're showing up to my place at this hour just to say that?” 
a drawn-out exhale left sae's lips at your reaction, the scent of alcohol accompanying it—a scent foreign to the sae you'd known. was he drinking? itoshi sae doesn’t drink – or at least the sae you knew would never let a single drop of alcohol taint his flesh. 
“just don’t. he’ll hurt you.”
a bitter laugh escaped you, “you're one to talk about hurting people, aren't you?”
if you didn't know better, you'd mistake the look he shot you for something resembling an apology mixed with regret. but no, you knew that those eyes can never hold such, not for you, not for anyone.
“news flash, itoshi. you don’t have the right to decide who i can or cannot go out with.” 
“don’t i?” 
his challenge lingered in the air, a question not constrained by words but driven by conflicting wills, a daring meeting of gazes that had been evaded until now.
you're so fucking unfair, itoshi sae.
“leave,” you spat, your grip on the doorknob tightened, fingers almost digging into the cool metal. 
“don’t i, y/n? do i not have a right to you?”
“please, sae. just go,” you murmured, eyes squeezed shut, a trace of tears threatening to break free.
“— because you have all damn rights to me that it fucking terrifies me.” 
and there it was.
the vulnerability he so fiercely and stubbornly concealed, laid bare for you to witness. it slipped out like an admission, raw and unguarded.
sae's insides churned as your gaze bore into him, the intensity of it feeling like a searing heat that left him exposed, his thoughts laid bare. it was as if you were looking at him as if he had grown a second head, an incredulity mirrored in his own disbelief at what he had just blurted.
but it’s the truth, a truth etched not in alcohol-induced haze but in the sobering clarity that you, ever loving you, terrified him. 
“you– you terrify me," his words stumbled out, like he was admitting a secret he never meant to reveal. “you’re the first thought that comes to my mind, and the last one before i sleep. i feel you everywhere, your presence, your absence — it terrifies me, y/n.” 
he ran a hand through his hair, a gesture of frustration that echoed the inner chaos he couldn't quite contain. the sting of alcohol just added to the jumble of thoughts, like mixing a cocktail of emotions he wasn't prepared to deal with. 
sae had never been great with handling drinks, and here he was, wearing his heart on his sleeve, a little more vulnerable than he’d intended. 
after all, a body so foreign to alcohol can only handle so much.
and it's ironic how that also applies to sae's acceptance of your love – like a liquor he's not used to, but still very much would like a taste.
he knew he had absolutely no right to show up here; he had no right to stop you from going out with another man; he had no right to claim a part of you, not after he shattered your heart because he was afraid of his own.
he knew that, but itoshi sae is selfish. he wanted you, terrifyingly so. he hoped — prayed, even—no one will ever have you the same way he does. 
and he meant that in the most selfish way possible. because, time and time again, itoshi sae was selfish, even more so when it came to loving you.
“it terrifies me,” he carried on, a touch firmer this time, his gaze unyielding as it held yours, “how much you consume me, and it frightens me even more how much i would let you.”
“then just let me, you stupid asshole.” 
the words burst out of you, a declaration that felt like a leap of faith. your arms instinctively reached out, embracing him as if to underscore your determination. you had caught his confession like a lifeline, and now it was your turn to throw your heart into the mix.
“and you have all the damn rights to me too,” you murmured against his lips.
the truth is, he doesn't deserve you, not in the slightest. but god, you want him to— so bad. and after hearing what he said, you knew he wanted the same thing too.
you wrap your arms tighter around him, and it's like fitting together two missing pieces. you missed this, missed him. no amount of trying will ever relieve the longing. because truth be told, hearts aren't great at playing hide and seek; that much can be seen from the way you’re both holding on to each other.
“i'll love you slowly, until it's not scary, until you get used to it,” you whispered, forehead pressed against his.
in the quiet space between your whispered words, sae felt the world shift beneath his feet. 
love with you wasn't meant to be frightening. love with you wasn't meant to be all-consuming.
love with you, he realized, only needed to be exactly like this— your fingers against his nape, a smile curving your lips, and the assurance in your gaze that promised better times ahead.
“i’ll get used to it.” maybe the words came off wobbly, but he couldn’t care any less now; it was a promise.
“you better.” you let out a chuckle, genuine this time, and it took just one chuckle for sae to realize that everything will be just fine. 
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[extra]:
“sae?”
you pull his attention, sensing his wakefulness from the lingering kisses he peppers on your skin. the same man who laid bare his heart to you was sprawled within your sheets, his breathing gentle against your neck.
though his lips stay sealed, the comforting squeeze of your hand relays that he was listening.
“where did you hear that i’m going out with oliver?”
a brief pause, followed by a scoff. way to ruin a moment, sae’s inner voice grumbles at the timing of your question. why bring up another guy's name now, especially when he's shirtless and right above you? the nerve.
“doesn’t matter.” he dismisses your question. 
yet, there's something oddly satisfying about riling up the usually composed sae, it’s one of your life’s greatest pleasures. and so, you press on, unable to resist the urge to tease. 
“come on, now. i want to know what made my cold and grumpy sae to show up at my door at 2 am, professing that i terrify him,” you pushed, meeting his irritated glare with an arched brow. “— and don’t give me that look. those were your words, not mine!”
tch. he clicks his tongue, fully aware you won't let him live down his confession. “got it from shidou. he told me right before asking me to drink with him.”
as those words escape sae’s lips, you burst into laughter, leaving him to wonder if he broke you with last night's late-night affection.
“what’s so funny?” he raises an eyebrow at your sudden outburst.
“shidou tricked you into drinking with him, love. i turned down oliver without a second thought. we didn't even get close to going on a date,” you playfully reveal, your grin growing. “i kind of mentioned that to shidou. we share gossip occasionally, you know.”
sae froze at what you said, and he didn’t need no damn mirror to see that he was turning red from the embarrassment and realization that he had been lured to drink.
“i’ll kill him.”
“and i’ll thank him.” may shidou get all the dopamine he so cunningly desires. 
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note. i also don't know what this is so don't look at me now :P i'm throwing tomatoes at myself
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yourstardarling · 27 days
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Astrology Observations: Fire Signs🔥
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Think of fire placements as the heat bringers. The fire signs are filled with passion and a lot of raw energy. People with these placements can be seen as extroverts even when they themselves don’t identify with that notion. It’s cause they have an inner confidence within themselves that just exudes out.
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🐏 I low key consider having an Aries Moon to be a debilitating placement. It’s mainly because Aries Moons had to learn to be emotionally independent and nurture themselves from a very young age. With the Mars influence, there’s often times a lot of conflict faced within family dynamics. A love hate relationship with family, they are the main ones that know how to get under their skin. Also, emotions are often times heightened and felt throughout the entire body. One moment it feels like we feel everything and then the next moment we’re back to normal.
🦁As bright as Leo risings are, they oftentimes carry a lot of inner insecurities. With Scorpio in the 4th house their home life was one of intensity and emotional trauma. Their family background is oftentimes something they rather not talk about, keeping it hidden from the public view. Leo Risings are the reason why I'll always hype up for Leo's to shine, because they have been in the dark for far too long.
🐴Mars In Sagittarius will go far and beyond when it comes to conflict. They're anger can become excessive and they will do the most to prove their point. That's why they'll oftentimes prefer to stay funny and optimistic so that they don't get pushed to their limit.
🐏Aries Placements aren’t always out to fight you. The thing about them is, they are always on guard. Think of them as knights ready to protect their castle from enemies. It’s more defensive than offensive. As soon as they feel like something threatens them, they will immediately address it. Once they’ve analyzed the situation, they can then decide whether to back off or go to war. It’s what separates them from Scorpio who don’t address things immediately, but let it simmer before striking.
🦁 Leo Suns are the most Leo placements, since they are literally the embodiment of the Sun. That is why most Leo Suns rep their sign so hard. They have a lot of pride about being a Leo and will not be afraid to let everyone know that. Also, a lot of them tend to have Lion Tattoos or an obsession with lions. May have loved the Lion king a lot more than other people, that movie was literally made for them. It’s really hard to not see a Leo Sun shine, the spotlight is always on them whether they like it or not. Unless the Sun falls in the 12th.
🐴Sagittarius Risings carry somewhat of a god complex within themselves. The sign is all about faith, so they hold strong beliefs about who they are and what they represent. They benefit a lot by finding a spiritual path that is individualistic to them. Even if they may not believe in God, they will always believe in themselves. This oftentimes works in their favor as I see they get away with things most people could not.
🐏Aries love to win, wherever you have Aries in your chart shows where you like to be a winner. It’s the go getting attitude that this placement brings to strive for victory. They are trailblazers, but if they see the trail not blazing, they are very quick to move on to the next endeavor. It’s cause the energy of Aries is short burst, it’s like an explosion and then it subsides to then explode again.
🦁Leo naturally shows us where we shine in our charts. It’s where we hold a lot of pride in ourselves for being good at something. This is our talents and the thing that makes us stand out. We can oftentimes become egotistical in this area of our lives, thinking we know what’s best. That is why Leo’s oftentimes get that egotistical criticism. However, Leo teaches us that we should be proud of our achievements and not allow others to dim our light. It’s important to have a humble heart, but also knowing your worth at the same time.
🐴Sagittarius is where we have good aim. We are often very lucky in this area of our lives. It is our lightning bolt and what we can often depend on to give us hope. The energy of Sagittarius is very expansive so the possibilities are endless with this sign. However, the Jupiterian nature makes most Sagittarius face the issue of excess. It’s important for them to redirect their aim and figure out where are they even heading. This is the mutable nature of Sag, always having to change the course of direction they are moving to. Sometimes the adventurous nature is not even something they choose to do, but have to in order to not be wandering around for no reason.
Each of the fire signs are really good at bringing attention to themselves. They are master storytellers because we have to remember they sit opposite the air signs. While the air signs tell stories about other people, the fire signs center the stories around themselves:
Aries placements are very open and honest about the hardships in their lives. They will tell you about the battles they have gone through and oftentimes glaze over issues like it wasn’t that serious. It’s because that experience in their lives is already over, so all they can do is move on. Meanwhile your over here looking at them like damn. Stories often involve them being the first to do something and how they triumphed over a situation they had.
Leo placements will reel you in with the theatrics. They will emphasize certain parts of the story to keep you entertained. It can be overly dramatized in order to get positive attention towards them. After all, Leo rules over the theater so these stories they tell about themselves have to be larger than life. As long as they gain positive feedback and make others feel good, they don’t care if they have to tweak some aspects of the story.
Sagitaurius placements will tell you stories about their adventures. Specifically stories involving their misadventures and how they ended up in bad situations. They hilariously look back upon these issues they face and usually it’s so unimaginable that it makes other people laugh. Someway somehow, they always manage to get back on their feet and things work out in their favor in the end. Situations that occur to these folks are always unique to them fr.
Also, this just my personal opinion Jesus was an Aries and had an Aries Rising. Hear me out. The whole lamb of God thing he had going on fits the signs association with lambs and rams. Baby lambs are born during the springtime, and Aries season begins the spring equinox. Jesus is the sacrificial lamb. In that sense, Aries is the first sacrifice and the sacrificial lamb that begins the zodiac cycle. All other signs are the followers/disciples of Aries. He’s God’s one and only son, because we only have one Sun. Aries is the exaltation of the Sun meaning that is where it’s at its full power. Don’t crucify me in the comments y'all this is just my speculation. I just don’t see Jesus as a Capricorn. Also, this man had to be real bold in order to tell the Roman’s and Rabbis to their face that their actions were wrong. That boldness just had to come from an Aries.
Anyways that is all.
- your Star Darling
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sytoran · 10 months
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𝐌𝐎𝐑𝐓𝐀𝐋 𝐃𝐄𝐌𝐈𝐒𝐄 | 𝐠𝐨𝐝𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐬!𝐧𝐚𝐭 𝐩𝐭.𝟑
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you and natasha were star-crossed lovers, separated by galaxies and timelines. like any other shakesperean tragedy, you and natasha's tale comes to an end... or does it?
pairing: goddess!natasha x dom!fem!reader (G!P)
note: this is the 3rd installment to the goddess!nat universe! please read the other parts first if you haven't already. this part contains major angst and smut. i have spent ungodly hours on this chapter.
word count: 4.5k (i am impressed with myself)
series m.list | main m.list | join the taglist | AO3
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Previously… 
No one escapes the consequences of their actions. Not even the Goddess of Lust, who had formed romantic relationships with a mortal. SHIELD’s decision to forbid the two of you from ever seeing each other again tears apart all the ‘what-ifs’ of a bright future.
Now…
Natasha doesn’t know how many hours she’s been crying in the bathtub.
After the finality of SHIELD’s crushing decision had truly weighed itself upon Natasha’s burdened shoulders, the mere thought of what she would have to do to you shook her to the bone.
Which is why she crashed at her sister’s place: to cry her problems away in a bathtub made of priceless gold, alongside a fine bottle of Pinot Grigio.
“Jesus, Nat, you’re gonna die of hypothermia if you stay in there a second longer.” Yelena says, kicking open the bathroom door with a tray of smoked salmon appetizers in hand.
“Take one,” Yelena says absentmindedly, sitting herself on the edge of the bathtub next to Natasha’s partially-submerged form. “Food helps with everything.”
Natasha doesn’t respond, only looking up at her sister through glassy eyes. Empty eyes. She felt raw and numb at the same time, but the contrasting emotions were merely child’s play in comparison to the storm that raged within her weary mind.
Yelena looks at her unamusedly, before folding her arms. “Talk to me,” she stated firmly, and it wasn’t a request.  The blonde sister was the Goddess of War, after all, she could be as intimidating and ruthless as she wanted to be.
Hot-headed at times, sure, but so paradoxically calculative and strategic at other times Natasha felt like she could get whiplash. Despite all of the finicky situations the older sister had found herself drowning in, Yelena was always there for her, fiercely protective with a passion like no other.
This was no different, with Yelena being the hand to pull her out of the water. Physically and metaphorically. 
Natasha inhaled shakily, then exhaled and felt a whole lot worse than before. Impulsively, she snatched one of the smoked salmon appetizers off the plate and stuffed it in her mouth, feeling her eyes well up as she does so.
“Damn, this human fucked you up this bad?” The blonde said quizically, with an air of sarcastic wit on the surface but a layer of genuine concern underneath only Natasha would be able to decipher. 
"... I've fallen in love with her." The Goddess says softly, faraway, like she was floating with the wind and time itself. Detached from reality, or perhaps running away from it.
Yelena stayed silent. For once, the Goddess of War was at a loss. 
“I’ve fallen in love with her,” Natasha says again, with slightly more conviction. She looks to her blonde sister, and Yelena’s heart nearly shatters at the sight of the sheer hurt on Natasha’s face. So broken, so agonized, everything that she did not deserve to be.
“But that doesn’t even matter, alright? She gave me her heart, Lena, and I’m going to have to break it. I’m gonna break so many– Fuck, I’m gonna have to break every single promise I’ve ever made to her, like she’s some kind of toy.” Natasha chokes out. “And I don’t, I fucking don’t– understand why it was us, why I lead her on and why I let it happen. I’m fucking stupid, and now it’s blown up in my face. Maybe I deserve it. Maybe I-”
“You’ve never deserved it,” Yelena interrupts, placing a hand over her sisters’. Is that how you’re supposed to comfort someone? Yelena doesn’t know. Anyways, she’s trying. “Nat, I know you’re the Goddess of Lust, and your reputation precedes you, but, you, of all people, deserve love.”
You deserve love… what a fucking lie that was.
“Don’t try that on me,” Natasha snaps, her walls snapping back up in record timing. Her self-destructive defence builds like armour, and soon she’s standing up. 
“I’ve done some fucked up shit in the past, and I’m very aware of it. I thought I’d moved past it, but now those demons have caught up to me, and I can’t do jackshit but watch the love of my life slip away from my fingers. I don’t deserve love, it just happened to find me and I played along because I thought it could last.”
Natasha’s chest heaves at the impact of the outburst. She stares at Yelena, who remains painfully impassive. Arms folded, jaw working on the stupid fucking smoked salmon.
Fuck, she wanted to hurt someone. Make them feel her pain. Let it consume them like it’s consuming her, let it choke them and–
“Is that what you really think, Nat? That you were simply playing a game with Y/N L/N? Because I assure you, I haven’t seen much but I know damn well that those two months with her pure, unfiltered, undying, devotion.”
Yelena’s words puncture a hole into her conscience, injecting venom with it. Each syllable, each emphasis, cuts her. Because Natasha knows that it’s true, but she can’t accept it or she’ll never be able to let you go.
So all she does is give Yelena the best death stare she can muster, and stalk out of her bathroom like her clothes aren’t dripping with bubbly water. (Yes, she had gone into the bathtub with all her clothes on. Depression waited for no man, or Goddess.)
She shakes her head, forcing the stray thoughts to dissipate, and fixes up her appearance with wordless magic.
My palace. Natasha visualizes the place, closing her eyes, and when she opens them again, she’s standing right outside the door.
Apprehensively, she puts her hand on the handle to the huge, sparkling door. You would be waiting on the other side, waiting for Natasha to come home. 
Waiting for Natasha to break your heart.
She pushes the door open before she can cower and hide, before she can run away and curse every sentient being in existence. 
It was time for her mortal demise.
It was time for Natasha to see the fruits of your hard work.
You wipe the sweat off your forehead with the back of your hand, huffing heavily but proud nonetheless. You step back to admire the absolute feast you had prepared for your girlfriend.
The fancy dining table was adorned with a checkered tablecloth and ornate with all kinds of things, expensive plates and cutlery already set up, just for two.
It was no secret that Natasha loved your home-cooked meals, despite being able to eat whatever she wanted, as a Goddess with a private chef. She had sworn you put something magical into your food.
You’ll never forget the moan she let out the first time she ate your perfected medium-rare New York Strip.
Which is exactly why you’ve spent over an hour cooking up a banquet of all kinds of food for the Goddess, an array of cuisines from all around the world. As much as you loved the hot sex you had with Natasha, you were an absolute sucker for the domesticity of life with her, how simple and perfect it was.
As if on cue, you hear the front door open, which was not too far away from the dining hall. 
Your heart physically leaps, unbridled excitement adorning your features. Natasha had taken longer than she normally would, and you could barely contain the anticipation thrumming in your bones.
That is, until you see Natasha standing in the hallway defeatedly, shoulders sagged and eyes lowered. Like all the life had been sapped out of her.
Fuck, you had never seen her like this. Natasha was the embodiment of undying energy, always with a smile on her face, or her expression schooled into composure, or her eyes fluttering in a state of lust. Not like this. 
Never like this.
“Darling?” you ask, hushed. You take one step towards her, tentatively. The head of red hair looks up to you, and Natasha’s biting her lip like she’s stopping the words from falling out of her mouth, like she’ll start crying if you say one word more.
“I-” Natasha tries, her voice hoarse and choked. The rest of her sentence dies in her throat, as she shakes her head and strides past you quickly, like she can’t burn any longer under your gaze.
Your hand drops in complete loss as Natasha simply walks past you, shoulders brushing like a ghost of what used to be warm hugs and sweet kisses. You chase after her before you know it, yelling her name as the Goddess speeds up.
Natasha blinks back tears furiously, striding through the dining hall as the servants scatter like mice. She hardly registers the feast prepared on the ornate table, vision blurring with each desperate cry of her name you let out.
“Natasha? What’s the matter? Talk to me, please!” 
You sprint faster, dodging your way through the hallways and up the wide set of stairs. The Goddess is within arm’s reach, now, and you extend your arm to grab onto hers, so you can spin her around and ask what on earth is going–
And the Goddess simply teleports away at the last second, the fleeting touch of her warm skin dissipating into thin air.
“Fuck!” you yell, eyes darting in frustration. Why was Natasha acting like this? Had you done something? Forget her birthday? No, that was December 3rd. Forget the anniversary of your first meeting? Nope, that was January 24th. What on earth had you done? Or had she done something? You–
No, okay, calm down. Slow down. The rational voice in your head speaks up. Where would Natasha have gone? What was a significant place she would escape to, in times of distress?
After a moment of contemplation, you find your answer, and sooner than later you’re sprinting up the long flight of spiral staircases to the Astronomy Tower. 
Natasha’s thankful for the dome-shaped glass ceiling the tower has, doing what it can to block out the cold. The sky is absolutely breathtaking, a heart-wrenching contrast to her inner turmoil.
It’s a dark blue and a soft pink, with millions of little bright planets splashing across the canvas like silver sequins. The view of the galaxy from the land of the Gods had always been the greatest, after all. 
The Goddess stands, unmoving and breathing lightly. She doesn’t feel the least bit better, but at least she’s calmed down in the slightest.
She’s bought some time by teleporting up here. Her hands were clammy, but no matter how many times she wipes them down on her dress it doesn’t change a thing. She can’t change a thing, not for anything, not for you.
“Natasha?” you ask, weakly, heaving at having sprinted up so many flights of stairs. 
At the sight of you, the Goddess feels the tears spring back into her eyes again. Stupid. She wants to say sorry. Stroke your face and kiss your lips, maybe. Well, not maybe, because she can’t. Because it’s the last– nope, she can’t say it.
“Nat, can you….. fuck, I need to work out more. Can you tell me what’s going on, please? I made- I made a New York Strip, if you’re hungry–”
The Goddess walks up to you, cradling the side of your face in her hands. Oh, fuck it. Tender, sweet, delicate. You’ve never seen her face like this before, so soft yet so broken.
“What—”
You’re cut off when Natasha leans into your space, eyelids fluttering shut. And for once, this wasn’t preordained or predetermined. You didn’t have to calculate the next move. You didn’t have to fix a destiny. 
Natasha’s lips meet yours in a grand, cruel, beautiful, broken kiss.
It feels so right, tongues interlocking like cogs on a machine, quavering breaths escaping from the sides of her mouth. You let her in, you drink her up. All other thoughts shut down.
Natasha kisses you with a hyena’s jaw, swearing she could never get enough, never satiate her desires for you, even if everything else is wrong. You’re stealing her every breath, every kiss, every sigh — she needed more.
She slides her hand down your torso, hands already finding the hem of your pants. But then you push her away – for the first time, for that last time – you push her away, and step back, and your head is spinning.
“I deserve to know,” you breathe heavily, and Natasha’s heart cracks. “You’re scaring me, Nat, okay? First you brush past me all soulless, and then you make me chase after you, and then you kiss me so- so sadly, and now you wanna fuck? It doesn’t make sense, not at all. I wanna know, I deserve to know, I–”
“You deserve everything,” Natasha interrupts, eyes transfixed on you now, and they look kaleidoscopic, just like the galaxy that hung above your heads. “You deserve everything, but I can’t give you what you need, and that’s why this is the last time we’re ever seeing each other again.”
Silence ensues.
You take a good moment to actually mentally digest what Natasha had just said. “...What?” 
“This is the last time we’re ever seeing each other again,” she repeats, firmer. You let out a bark of laughter in disbelief, half-joking, but Natasha’ stony face makes your face drop.
“Are you… breaking up with me?” you whisper, scared to say it loud, like doing so would make it less true. Natasha feels her heart clench, and her hands shake because you’ve never sounded so small, so vulnerable.
“No, I’m not– I had to, Y/N, darling,” Natasha says, trying to reason, clasping your hands in hers, shaking her head desparately, like it would stop her eyes from welling up. “I’m a Goddess, and you’re a mortal. I love you, please. But we can’t do this, we can’t-”
“Is it me?” you ask, softly, troubled. Eyes locking Natasha’s magnificent green eyes, one’s that you’ve fallen in love with a thousand times. Ones that you were still in love with.
“No,” Natasha says immediately, her knuckles whitening. “It’s not you. Definitely not.”
“Then who is it?” you follow up, eyes narrowing, head tilted. “Who’s the one tearing us apart?”
It was them, Natasha wants to scream out, until her lungs burned and her chest heaved and she ran out of tears. You’re the best fucking thing that’s happened in my life, and I’m a damned fool if I ever let you go, but this isn’t in my hands anymore. She wanted to curse the higher beings for centuries, taint their names with bitter words, but she couldn’t get the words out of her mouth.
You grow more hopeless as the silence stretches on. 
No, you’re the villain. Natasha’s voice says in her head. This was what had come to bite her back, this was her karma. You’re paying for everything you’ve ever done wrong, for all the hearts you’ve broken and never mended. It’s your turn to face the music, your turn to go through suffering. What a shame, isn’t it? That she’s the one who’s so hurt because of you. Y/N L/N. Only person to blame is yourself.
…Only person to blame is yourself.
“It’s me,” Natasha finally says, a shell of a woman who once was, and the Goddess swears she hears your heart smash into smithereens, the glass pieces against the floor you trod on.
“No, what are you saying, Nat?” you ask, confused, tearing up, visibly shaking. “You’re- we’re together. We’re doing good. We’re doing so fucking good, please don’t–”
“I’m the Goddess of Lust, and you’re an attorney from earth. We were never gonna work out. I wasn’t made to have long-lasting, committed relationships. Just… lustful nights,” the falsehood of the words that fell out of Natasha’s mouth wasn’t her own. It tasted bitter on her tongue, but it was like medicine and it was the right thing to do.
You needed a villain. Someone to hate. Someone to blame it all on.
And Natasha happened to be a very good one.
“We were a time-ticking bomb, Y/N, separated by galaxies you could never even fathom.” she continues. “We were never meant to be. I realise how wrong I am for this, because it was never real–”
“It was real to me!” You yell out, voice cracking, tears in your eyes. 
Natasha is stunned by the sheer volume of your words, so ferocious and so determined and fuck, she was pathetic. “It was fucking real to me, alright? It was the realest thing I’ve ever had in my entire life. It was so fucking real, Nat, so you don’t get to just pretend you never fell in love!”
Love.
“Love?” Natasha asks, letting out an amused huff of disbelief. “Love doesn’t exist, not in my world, Y/N L/N. It had to end at some point, you know that. You have your responsibilities, I have mine. We’re over, alright?”
You stand there, feet rooted on the ground, face fallen and ashen and grey. This was a dream. This was a dream, and you’d wake up next to the real Natasha later, the one with sweet smiles and peanut butter cookies, and everything would be alright.
“I’ve said what I had to say,” the Goddess says, and she has to regulate her breathing so she won’t choke on her words and swallow them back. She had to escape before she fell to her knees and begged you for forgiveness. “I’m leaving, now.”
She turns, and you grab her arm. “You’re staying.” you state, non-negotiable. A commanding tone. One that Natasha had grown to love.
This time, she scoffs, wrenching herself out of your grasp. “Fucking make me, then.”
Just like that, a lever between the two of you was flicked, and the sexual tension you’d been trying to avoid since just now is nearly suffocating.
“We’re not gonna do this right now,” You growl, looking up at the ceiling with a clenched jaw. Teetering on the edge of precipice was your raging impulse, to either punch a hole in the wall or shove your hand up Natasha’s skimpy dress.
The Goddess tilts her head up in defiance, looking at you daringly in the eyes. Your eyes narrow, taking it as a challenge. God, she looked so fucking bratty like that, and it didn’t help that she was still wearing a stupidly skimpy dress and that her pink lip gloss made that mouth so damn kissable.
“No? Then I’m leaving,” Natasha says abruptly, her tone of voice unyielding and domineering. She uncrosses her arms and turns on her heel, her hand going to the door of the tower. 
The rhythmic clicking of her strappy high heels against the tiling of the ground ticks your brain like a metronome. You stand there with your arms folded, her long legs in the field of vision of narrowed eyes. 
Click, click, click–
And then she’s being spun around and slammed against the back of the door with an unruly force.
“The only time someone ever turns their back on me, when I’m talking, is when they’re bendin’ over,” you growl into Natasha’s skin, each pause in your sentence filled with a harsh bite to her porcelain skin. Her gasp-turned-moan is heaven to your ears. 
Natasha struggles for a moment, hand still grasping for the doorknob. “Fuck,” she cries, but she feels the gyration of your roughly-shoved thigh up her dress and she nearly loses it. You wrap a hand around her neck, letting her give up her power, and you do what you’ve done a thousand times before.
Except this was the last time.
You don’t bother to take off her garments as you hike up the bottom of her dress and push your front against her. “Fuck,” Natasha moans, feeling your rock-hard bulge against her panties. She tries to grind against it, tries to alleviate the growing tension, but you do nothing more than rut against her until she’s fucking soaking.
“I don’t think so,” you growl, hands going to her ass as you push her up against the wall. Your mouth latches on to whatever slivers of bare skin you can find, on her neck and her collarbone and her upper cleavage.
You suck hard on her porcelain skin, leaving marks like you could claim her. Like this wouldn’t be the last time. “Please,” Natasha begs, indescribably aroused, her panties completely soaked through. You had never been this unforgiving.”Need you, please.”
“Yeah, that wasn’t what you were saying just now, hmm?” You ask, harshly, slapping the side of her thigh just because you can. You pin her against the wall with your knees and your left hand, using the other to unbuckle your own pants. 
She tries to reach out to help you, but you slap her hand away. “Don’t fucking touch me,” you say coldly, and Natasha wants to cry but she knows she brought it upon herself.
It takes you more time on your own, but you get the job done and the sight of your cock, the one Natasha took the first day she met you, it makes her cunt grow a heartbeat and she’s a fucking mess against the wall.
“Now you need me so bad?” You taunt, rubbing the tip of it against the slit of her pussy. “Don’t have any more words to say?” God, she’s absolutely drenched, and you think you’re gonna die if you don’t go inside her in the next five seconds.
This was probably the worst way to communicate, but, fuck, the two of you were bad at talking and you couldn’t resist the divine goddess that was Natasha, no matter how badly she had hurt you.
You nearly cum the second you enter the Goddess. Her velvet walls cling tight to you, so warm, too fucking warm. Natasha’s babbling something you don’t understand, but you can’t wait any longer.
“Oh, fuck!” she moans, as you slide your cock into her wet cunt with ease.
Your bodies move together with every thrust, Natasha’s legs wrapped tight around your torso as you thrust into her against the door. It’s hard, and fast, and rough, and nothing tender like your Saturday mornings.
She clings to your back, head thrown back, moans and cries bouncing off the sides of the wall. The door is shaking, like it might crack from the sheer weight of your thrusts into her.
You grunt at the inconvenience of that prospect, instead opting to walk the two of you back to a desk in the corner. Natasha gasps, whimpering into your neck as you walk across the floor with your cock still deep inside her pussy. It’s too sensitive, so sensitive everywhere.
You bend her over the desk, pulling away then lining yourself up again. 
You’re about to make her beg, before the irrational, carnal side of your mind takes over, and you’re pounding into her pretty little cunt mercilessly. Grunting and groaning as lodge your cock in deeper with each harder thrust, as her moans delve into a symphonic crescendo of screams of your name.
She’s thrashing around, so warm and so wet and so overstimulated all over, but you don’t let up for a moment. You only grip her thighs harder and make her hear how wet she is, before Natasha’s eyes are rolling into the back of her head and there’s drool at the sides of her mouth.
“Pretty slut,” you grunt, pulling out to slap at her puffy clit before she’s squirting, white cream going all over the mattress. “Daddy,” Natasha moans pornographically, visibly shuddering at your degradation. She might like it, a little too much.
The title that had fallen from her lips elicits a groan of acknowledgement out of you, but simultaneously brings back the bittersweet flashbacks of your time spent with her.
This was the last time.
After she’s come down from her high and you’ve hit your climax, you spread her legs and lean down to get a good taste.
"Oh! Daddy - ungh - please," she begs, as your tongue meets her overstimulated cunt. Natasha hadn't even recovered from her previous orgasm, still bent over the desk and panting like she was in heat.
You lap greedily at her wet cunt from behind, and the sheer novelty of how many times you’ve done this truly hits you. How many hours you’ve spent exploring Natasha’s body. How many days you’ve spent worshipping.
All for it to succumb to this.
It’s only after another few orgasms that the weight of ‘the last time’ hits you. Both of you have ended up on the floor, completely naked, heaving heavily to regain oxygen.
“I loved you,” you whisper, hovering above Natasha, and the use of the past tense makes chips away at Natasha’s heart. It’s only then does she realise that there are tears on her cheeks, because you’re crying.
“You deserve someone better,” is the only thing the Goddess says, a ghost of her whisper on your lips. 
“You've ruined me for anyone else,” you say, face devoid of the passion there once was. “You loved me so tenderly I won't be able to have another, had such good sex I can't sleep with anyone else.”
Natasha doesn’t respond to that. She can’t respond to that. There were too many unsaid words, broken promises, a future yet to be.
Both of you look up at the pink-blue sky, bare backs on an astronomy tower, bound by love and unbound by timelines and galaxies. It was brokenly beautiful, undeniably so. 
You only wish everything could’ve been different.
You wake up the next day in an unfamiliar bedroom. The room was far too small, the walls were too grey, the air was too cold, and fuck.
No, no, no, fuck. This was not happening.
Realisation slams into your exhausted body like a two-hundred kilogram sledgehammer, and you're winded by the weight of the impact.
This wasn't Natasha's home. This wasn't her fancy palace. 
This wasn't the Goddess' universe.
Air crushes your lungs. Your heart pounds in your chest.
This was your bedroom. This was your universe. The one you had spent all your days in, before you met the love of your life. 
At least, who you so stupidly believed to be the love of your life.
You get up with a start, the ache in your bones forgotten with the sheer emotions coursing through your veins, terror and disbelief and anger.
Your mind swims as you grab at anything you can, overturning furniture and messing up papers to find anything, anything, that could explain why this had happened.
Deep inside your chest, you had already known. Even if you managed to fool yourself. Even if you’d dreamt up a whole future of your life with her.
With a shuddering breath, your eyes fall to an envelope on your bedside table. You open it with trembling hands, almost fearful of what lay beyond.
In the envelope, contained a signed check with so many zeroes you could live luxuriously for the rest of days. 
In the envelope, contained a note with five fated words and the name of the one that got away.
All you're left with is a broken promise, an agonized cry, and the ghost of what could've been. 
To every universe and back,
N.R.
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series m.list | main m.list | AO3
4.5k words my eyes are not okay i've been staring my screen and typing for two hours straight, look what i'm going thru for yall
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2K notes · View notes
bradshawssugarbaby · 3 months
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God, Your Mama and Me (Jake Seresin x Reader)
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A/N: told y'all I listened to country music and it inspired me. Inspired by and quotes God, Your Mama and Me by Florida Georgia Line. I'm not religious but that song gets me all heart-eye emoji every time.
pairing: Jake Seresin x reader (I'm 99% sure I kept reader GN the whole time with no mentions of appearance)
content/warnings: reference to God via the song (the line is "no one's ever gonna love you more than God, your mama and me"), Jake being adorable and trying his best to be romantic but he's more awkward than he wants to be bc he doesn't do PDA, brief references to potential character death (I promise no one dies)
word count: 1.6k
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Jake took you by the hand, running playfully through the sand. Coronado Beach was where he’d taken you for your first date. It was where you’d met, where you spent every free weekend, where you’d meet with his friends at The Hard Deck for drinks on Friday nights and where you’d sit and watch the planes taking off from North Island as you waited for him to come home, not knowing what each day would bring but hoping and praying he’d come home to you safe and sound every time. 
For the last three years, Coronado was an integral part of your life. It was where you’d held Jake’s 35th birthday party, a spontaneous beach gathering complete with a cooler of chilled beers and a portable speaker belting out country tunes. Despite the groans from others, the music had a magical effect on the usually reserved Jake, prompting him to join in with spirited, off-key singing every time. 
It was where you and Jake had shared your first kiss, where he’d first told you he loved you - a sentence he admitted he never thought he’d say to anyone, swearing up and down he’d lead the bachelor life until he either died or retired, whichever came first. He’d always claim it was because he just “wasn’t the settlin’ type”, but his friends always saw right through it. 
“He’s just scared,” Bradley had assured you one day over a beer while Jake tossed darts effortless at the board a few feet out of earshot. 
Reading the puzzled look on your face, Natasha hummed playfully as she sipped her drink before raising an eyebrow at you. 
“He doesn’t want to settle down because he’s scared,” She and Bradley nodded in unison. 
“Yeah, doesn’t wanna leave behind a war widow kinda thing,” Bradley shrugs, “You’d think it’d be me who feels that way considering my dad died when I was literally a toddler, but no, apparently it’s Blondie who’s got the commitment issues.”
The first time Jake referred to you as his girl, the usually chatty Bradley had been rendered speechless, mouth agape while Natasha had choked and sputtered on her beer as she looked wide eyed at Bradley and back at Jake. Jake shrugged it off as if it was nothing, but everyone, even you, knew it was uncharacteristic of him. 
The following weekend after stunning his Navy buddies, he’d been called away to the first mission since you’d started dating. You weren’t expecting it, but you got a heartfelt, emotional goodbye from Jake, one that was genuine and raw, a side of him you’d never seen before. He’d hugged you tightly and kissed you slow and sweet, making it last, permanent on your mind in case he didn’t make it back. As he promised you he’d return, you could hear his normally velvety smooth Southern drawl crack as his voice caught in his throat. 
When he came home a few weeks later, you’d greeted him with a warm embrace, and he held you tighter than he ever had before, his first true public display of affection towards you. Bradley and Natasha could be heard whispering, while Bob simply looked on smiling, knowing how in love Jake really was, watching as it mirrored Bob’s own relationship with his girlfriend. 
“Jake, where are you taking me?” 
You laughed as you snapped back to the present, raising an eyebrow at him as he continued to lead you across the sand. His cargo shorts were hugging his hips perfectly, golden-tanned skin from the California sun illuminated in the light of the setting sun. His green eyes were full of a child-like excitement, his signature grin plastered on his face, looking like it couldn’t be wiped off even if you tried.
“Just trust me, ok? You trust me, don’t ya, Sugar?”
“Alright, alright, I trust you.”
“Atta girl, c’mon, almost there.”
You shook your head and shot him a playful eyeroll as he continued to guide you along the shore. Your mind flashed back to when you and Jake had first slept together - instead of the playful arrogance, overwhelming confidence and cocky egotistical attitude he gave off around his friends, he was the opposite when it came to loving you. He was gentle, caring, passionate and considerate. He checked in with you, making sure you were comfortable and enjoying it. He was selfless in the way he loved you - making sure you were taken care of in all aspects before he was, and if for whatever reason, his climax came before yours, he made a point to bring you to yours by whatever means necessary. 
When Jake asked you to move in with him, the look on your face was one of pure shock and disbelief, you were sure you were dreaming it. Your wide-eyed gaze and raised eyebrows were enough to make Jake laugh, shaking his head at you.
“Now that’s not how I thought you’d react, babe.”
“I’m sorry…I just…can you say it again?”
“Ask you again?”
“Yeah, please?”
“Ok, Sugar, you’re losin’ it, but sure, I want you to move in with me, that sound alright to ya? We both complain we don’t see each other enough, and well, I just feel like it’s time we do somethin’ ‘bout it, right?”
You nodded your head and simply threw your arms around him, letting Jake embrace you tightly as he kissed your cheek. He had his friends help you pack and by the end of that week, you were moved in with him, sharing the little house on base together. His Cowboys jersey hanging in the closet next to your Commanders one - your teams were bitter rivals, and Bradley, who had come from Virginia, your home state, was beyond shocked to see Jake allowing you to wear a Commanders jersey to their Sunday night football watch parties. Bradley, forced to wear a jersey for another team, pouted at Jake.
“How come when I wear my Commanders jersey, I get told to fuck off and stay outside?”
“You don’t look cute in Washington’s colours, Bradshaw,” Jake replied matter of factly as he kissed you on the cheek, leaving Bradley to pout once again.
Jake stopped in front of you, turning his body to face you, bringing you back to reality for another moment. His unwavering grin still on his face, smiling at you as if you were the only sight around him for miles. Your heart melted when he looked at you - it always did - the love he had for you was always evident on his face, his gaze full of admiration and affection for you.
Your eyes widened as Jake went down on one knee in front of you. The sounds of the waves crashing against the sandy coast echoing softly around you. The odd passerby gawking as they went for their stroll in the dusky glow of the beach as the sun began to set on Coronado. Jake beamed up at you from where he stood on bended knee, his eyes matching the seafoam that was pooling around you, inching closer and closer to where you stood. 
“Darlin’, remember that date I took ya on, where you made me dance with ya on the beach, after I swore I never would? That song you made me dance to, the one by Florida Georgia Line?”
“I remember,” you said, gazing at him with tear soaked eyes.
“Sugar, you know I’m not good at this kinda stuff - it’s more Bradley’s thing, being all sentimental and shit, but I’m gonna try my damnest, ok? You know how that song goes, “Baby you know my love is never gonna run dry, never gonna come up empty, now until the day I die, unconditionally,”
Jake’s cheeks blushed a soft pink as he tried his best to carry the tune, serenading you by the oceanside, “then it’s like, “You know I’m always gonna be here for ya, no one’s ever gonna love you more than God, your mama and me”? Guess that’s what I’m tryin’ to say here, no one on this earth is gonna be able to love you, or anyone else more than I do. I’m sure of it. I didn’t even think it was possible for me to love you as much as I do, but Baby, do I ever love you.”
“Jake,” you started, feeling yourself becoming breathless with excitement as he spoke.
“Babygirl, will you do me the greatest honor ever, and become Mrs. Seresin? I never thought I’d ever marry anyone, but I’d be a fool to not marry you, darlin’.” 
Speechless, you nodded your head quickly, unable to make any sound other than an excited squeal of delight as he slipped the ring onto your finger. As Jake stood upright, he wrapped his arms around you, enveloping you in a loving embrace, his lips crashing against yours as he kissed you passionately.
From behind you, you could hear familiar voices cheering - you broke the kiss and turned to see Reuben, Javy, Mickey, Bradley, Natasha and Bob standing there, all beaming at you. Bradley wiped a single tear from his eye in his usual dramatic fashion, while Bob gave a proud thumbs up to Jake. A congratulatory smile formed on Natasha’s features, while Javy, Mickey and Reuben all applauded you both. You were overcome with emotion as you shared this moment with Jake and your friends. 
“You all knew?”
“Of course we knew, Jake can’t keep a secret to save his life,” Natasha grinned, shrugging her shoulders.
“I get to be best man, right?” Bradley grinned as he clapped his hand onto Jake’s shoulder in a congratulatory substitute for a hug. 
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flowerwrites06 · 6 months
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forest bride — myg
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FOREST BRIDE | Min Yoongi | Oneshot | Requested by Anon
Original Request: hii i would like to request an arranged marriage au that turned out as a healthy relationship, unlike where oc came from y'know family full of mistreatment and favoritism. any member is fine! thank u! Plot: The business transaction of a marriage between two previous warring clans takes an unexpected turn. Pairing: Yoongi x OC (Name: Kiku) Genre: Historical Inspired | Arranged Marriage Rating: 18+ Word Count: 8.9k Warnings: emotionally distanced family dynamics, emotional abuse and bullying from family members, minor character death (mentioned), angst, explicit sexual content (unprotected, gentle). Author's Note: This was soo much fun to do! I hope you like reading it as much as I loved writing it! Thank you to the anon who requested this <3
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Kiku was a quiet daughter amongst children of four in the Moon Clan. She was in the middle of the line of birth, often keeping to herself while her father doted on her brothers and her mother babied Hanaka, her sister. Kaito, the oldest son of their family, was the only person who ever paid attention Kiku.
He taught her how to play the Koto when they were younger. The soft plucking of strings were the only sounds she made in her household. Her mother, Keiko complimented the sound with the assumption that it was Hanaka. When Kaito explained that it was Kiku, their mother pointed the lack of precision at the ends of each verse.
Kiku felt safe and comforted under the wing of Kaito.
But fate had other plans.
Kaito grew sick after a hunting wound turned gangrenous and the winter only worsened his condition. When he passed, Kiku felt the searing and back-breaking weight of her family's scrutiny.
Suddenly she was no longer Kaito's companion. She was a mouth they didn't want to feed.
On the fresh cusp of spring, her parents unceremoniously announced her arrangement to marry the chief of the Onyx clan. Their rival.
"Kaito said they were dangerous," Kiku said as she knelt on the ground of their main living area. Her parents stared down at her while Hanaka and their younger brother Haruki sat on the cushioned mat.
"Kaito isn't here. Don't name him when we haven't finished mourning, stupid girl," Keiko spoke through gritted teeth.
"You will marry Chief Min Yoongi and give this family an important alliance," Daiki said with a finality to his tone.
The Onyx Clan was notorious for raiding other clans, enslaving their high-born families and treating any foreign spouses like dirt. Preventing them from causing any problems in the Moon Clan was to keep them at bay with something that they didn't think was a risk.
Keiko would never send Hanaka to a place like that. Perhaps Kiku was prepared specifically for this very alliance, forcing themselves not to love her so they could make a difficult decision. Perhaps that was just her own heart trying to find a glimpse of love in a place that had none for her since the beginning.
Kiku lowered her head in a solemn acceptance, her dress still black and her heart still raw from mourning the only family member who loved her. "I will do as you wish."
-
The wedding flourished during a misty, cold morning just at the skirts of dawn where purple kissed the edges of the mountains. Kiku wore a white dress of pretty silk, embroidered in both ivory and crimson thread as if the cloth bled. A white veil laid over her head giving the world around her more of a misty vision.
They held the wedding in the central border between the Moon and Onyx Clan. There was a gentle plain where it was decorated with flowers, divided with wood and a tea set prepared on a small wooden table. Her father walked her over to the table.
Kiku forced herself not to look at her groom just yet. Instead staring at the teapot in front of them, spouting a plume of steam with the faint hint of jasmine and honey in her nose. Tea ceremonies during weddings were a common tradition amongst both clans. Thankfully, it was a tea that Kiku enjoyed but the symbol of it dawned on her like a heavy weight on her back.
Sharing tea with a man outside her family was a sign that she was now connected to him. Bonded to him. A man that Kiku hadn't even looked at yet. So she gained some bravery within herself and stared up.
Min Yoongi wasn't a large man but he was taller than her. In this vulnerable state, he looked like a looming statue. It wasn't necessarily his stature but his presence that created weight. His black eyes pierced deeply into her as if peeling off layers of every protective sense she had of herself.
A deep scar ran down his eye, making it a little greyer than the left eye. His lips were pursed and a little pink while his pitch black hair was long to the nape. Short hair was often a sign of a deadly warrior. Someone who killed many without mercy and had little honour. At least that was what her parents told her.
The esteemed monk stepped to the front of the altar and began to recite ancient chants of a bonding ritual. Kiku tried to focus on the words but she couldn't stop keeping Yoongi's gaze. His eyes softened just then when she wasn't loosening her gaze either. As if he was waiting for her to look at him.
For a brief moment, Kiku noticed something gentle behind that demeanour. Or perhaps it was yet again her mind tricking her into feeling something positive when her world was turning upside down and she couldn't do anything about it. Yoongi glanced briefly over to the monk as they stepped to the table.
He waved his hands as he spoke his chants before gesturing to a young boy.
It was the father's duty to pour the tea. So Daiki poured it with a solemn face, almost bored. The waft of jasmine and honey coated her nose, giving her some comfort.
The groom shared his tea with the bride first. Yoongi's hands were veined heavily as if he were training in the dark hours of the morning before coming here. He reached out carefully, slow enough so Kiku didn't feel shocked. He pulled at the fabric and revealed her face, the cold morning breeze kissing her heated up skin.
Yoongi picked the tea cup, softly placing the brim of the cup to her lips.
Kiku kept her eyes on him right until she felt the warm honey touch of the tea on her tongue. She slowly pressed her lips together as he pulled the cup away. Just as Yoongi's cup clinked down, she picked up her own cup.
Yoongi lowered his head a little, making it easy to her to gently tip the cup. He took a sip, his throat bobbed up and down before she placed it back on the table.
The ceremony had been sealed. Even as Kiku foolishly tried to look back and say goodbye to her family, her mother was already fixing Hanaka's hair and her father continued speaking to Haruki. Niether of them gave any indication that they wished for a goodbye so Kiku turned back without a word.
Yoongi held her hand, just barely brushing at first to ensure Kiku would respond.
Kiku curled her fingers around his, allowing him to fully intertwine together before making way to the horses.
Yoongi clasped her waist, pushing her up to sit on the horse. Then he sat behind her, grabbing the reins as the scent of rain wafted in Kiku's nose.
The air turned wet to the touch and she noticed the darkened splotches on the tree bark of a soft drizzle slowly turning to gentle rain.
"Are you sure you don't want to speak to them?" Yoongi uttered his first question as her husband and Kiku wasn't sure how to respond or feel.
Kiku glanced briefly at her family, seeing Haruki rubbing his brow in boredom while her mother was still having a conversation with Hanaka, touching her chin. Still none of them tried to look her away. "It's alright."
Yoongi didn't order the horse to move for a few minutes before a small hum vibrated through his chest, tingling her back. "Very well," he said. He made a clicking noise and the horse began to gallop at a steady pace.
The forest that was considered Moon Clan's territory was an identical stream of teal leaved trees and small wildflowers, clustered amongst light brown mushrooms and wet lands. Kiku enjoyed walking through them purely because it was peace outside of her household.
However, Onyx Clan's territory harboured something so different that it almost felt magical. There were still those collections of teal leaved trees that wafted a sweet scent. Other than that, she saw patches of yellow and pink flowers, flat mushrooms that blushed at the edges and pretty deep green vines that wrapped around dark tree bark.
The sun began peeking a sharp light at the edge of the mountains, making the distant rivers look like melted gold.
The Onyx Clan itself was a beautiful village, with calmly sleeping cows and horses in their stables. Night food stalls open for business as families were out to eat chilli noodles and honeycomb candy. Moon Clan was so used to clean diets and fresh fish that the deep, spiced notes of the stalls overwhelmed Kiku, reminding her even more than she wasn't in her old household anymore.
People of the Onyx Clan gave way when they noticed Yoongi riding into the village. Their faces filled with smiles and excited whispers as they noticed her white dress. A little girl waved shyly at her.
Kiku hesitated but waved back with a faint smile.
As they arrived to the main cluster of houses for the high-born Min family, Kiku saw a group of people waiting for them.
Yoongi jumped off the house with a thud before gently holding onto Kiku again and helping her onto the ground as well. A small set of stairs led up to the cluster of houses.
When they reached, the older woman in centre gave a kind smile. By the way she was dressed in a beautiful silk kimono and the way Yoongi bowed low when seeing her, Kiku knew she was the matriarch of the family. Seeing so much kindness after her grief was something Kiku hadn't prepared herself to expect. So for a moment, she felt lost and unable to respond. She managed to give a wide enough smile.
"Bloody hell, Yoongi, you scared the shit out of her," a young woman from the side chuckled. Not in mockery but just jovial nature.
"Yun," the older woman reprimanded with a serious expression. "Manners." She turned back to Kiku with a smile. "Sorry, my dear, I understand you're in a new place. And our clans haven't had the best relationship but you are family now." She reached out and touched her hand.
Kiku could've been moved to tears at a warm mother's touch but she kept herself strong.
"My name is Hwayoung," she said. "These are my daughters Nari and Yun. I have a son named Yeong but he's away on a trip and will return tomorrow."
Kiku nodded. "It's lovely to meet you."
Hwayoung's flickered to Yoongi. "Let's have dinner and then you both can go rest."
After their dinner concluded and Kiku's belly was warm, they convened back to their bed chambers.
Kiku was given night dresses and also new clothes for the next few days. Especially since her family didn't give her any dress to take except for one.
For a while, the room was left empty with just Kiku watching the fire flicker before skimming through the books laid upon the mantle. It was mostly war and history stories along with some manuals on mastering the sword. Kiku wished she had some books on the Koto to play and fill her days that didn't have to do with having Yoongi's children. But she wasn't sure.
Hwayoung and Yoongi's sisters seemed nice enough but there was no way of telling whether it was a momentary ruse. After all, they couldn't be rude to her in front of everyone. Although a part of Kiku wanted to believe that their kind faces were genuine.
The door then clicked open. Yoongi walked through, wearing a relaxed black silk shirt and his hair tousled as if he had just taken a bath. He closed the door behind him, expression taken aback for a moment as if he hadn't expected someone in his bed chambers before softening.
"Do you have everything you need?" Yoongi asked.
"Yes, thank you." Kiku walked forward to him as he sat at the edge of the bed. She didn't say anything yet but Yoongi's throat bobbed up and down.
Stammering, he said. "We can just sleep."
Kiku blinked curiously. Of all the things she expected, this wasn't one of them. It was relieving that he was kind but to completely let her adjust to the new place was not on the list of expectation. "Are you sure?"
"I'm sure," Yoongi said, keeping his eyes on her. "It's been a long day. We should both rest."
Kiku intertwined her fingers together and nodded, feeling a strange warmth in her chest. "Alright. Good night."
-
In the morning, Kiku awoke to an empty space in her bed. When one of the maidservants entered to serve her, she explained that Yoongi went out to train early in the morning just before breakfast to keep him awake.
Kiku hoped she didn't look scared to deter him into performing any marital duties. Perhaps throughout the day, she could try to comfort him. She knew what she was getting into.
After taking a warm bath with the maidservant being surprisingly gentle and kind, Kiku was called into breakfast by Hwayoung.
The Min family gathered under a gazebo structure made from black wood. It was round and the food laid out smelled like home in a place that hadn't been her home for a full day yet. Baked fish, soups, rice, fruits for sweetness. It was a spread for something that usually rushed in her family. Or at least Kiku would have to eat quickly.
Kiku sat down next to Yoongi while Yun and Nari continued on their conversation. Yoongi's brother, Yeong came in from his trip and he looked a softer compared to his older brother and smiled often. Usually making jokes with his mother.
Yoongi ate fish and seemed to prefer the soups over rice.
While the others were deep in their conversation, Kiku leaned in slightly. "How was training?" she asked.
Yoongi looked up, again a little shocked but quickly softened. "It was good."
"Yoongi gets quite sore after his training, Kiku," Yun said with a small smirk. "Maybe later in the afternoon, you should give him a massage. Lord knows he needs a good one."
Yoongi glared for a moment but Kiku found it endearing.
"Yun," Hwayoung reprimanded but with a playful air this time rather than the disciplinary one of last night. "Kiku should not be forced to do anything she doesn't want to."
Kiku stammered. "I'm alright with it. I used to give shoulder massages to my brother all the time."
Yoongi cleared his throat. "It's really alright." He nodded.
Kiku smiled politely, lowering her head.
"Perhaps Kiku should come spend the day with us since brother insists on being boring," Yun said.
"I am new here," Kiku said.
"A tour then," Nari said.
Hwayoung perked up. "You can take her down to the markets and get some silks or jewellery. There's lots of music playing there too."
Kiku blinked curiously. "Would there be any Koto players?"
"You like the Koto?" Hwayoung asked.
"My brother taught me how to play." Kiku's heart clenched at the mention of him again. It had been so lovely to be in a place like this. How nice would it have been if their family all spoke so easily to one another.
"That's sweet. How is your brother now?"
"He's passed away," Kiku said.
"I'm sorry, my dear." Hwayoung's eyes turned sad. Both of empathy for her but something else. "I lost my husband a while ago as well. I understand it can feel empty." The table turned quiet for a few moments to remember their father
"Thank you." Kiku's words were simple but Hwayoung didn't fully realise just how much comforting words directed at her. Like a warm, tight hug that she could cry into.
-
Kiku spent her time walking around with Yun and Nari as they explained all the ins and outs of the clan's main village. They had three smaller towns that used the same supplies and answered to Yoongi as Chief but this was the clan that Yoongi's ancestors had built and it was beautiful.
Nari took her to the bookshop and silk store. Kiku bought herself a pretty purple silk dress while also getting books on poetry that she used to enjoy listening to. A poetess would visit their clan when they were younger and Kaito would work in the shadow puppet shows to re-enact them.
It was one of the few things Kiku was allowed to watch with the family while helping Kaito work with the puppets.
Then they went to the food stalls. Kiku ate spicy dumpling noodles with mushrooms foraged from the forest. Apparently they helped with childbearing as the old woman stated, clearly knowing that it was going to be her who bears the next Chief. Kiku hadn't quite let that sink in but even when she did think about it, it wasn't a horrible thought.
Kiku, Yun and Nari then made their way to the training grounds once their bellies were full and their cheeks hurt from laughing. Kiku hadn't laughed or smiled like this since Kaito made jokes to cheer her up. While they did bicker, Yun and Nari seemed like they were close and loving to one another.
Kiku wondered if Hanaka and her would have ever been like that if their mother didn't get involved so much.
At the centre of the training grounds, Kiku saw Yoongi training with his younger brother Yeong. He spoke instructions for Yeong to follow, keeping one hand behind his back as if to hinder himself from making any strong moves. Yeong kept his hands tight on the hilt of the sword, swinging right against Yoongi's parries as the clang of steel whistled in the air.
Kiku found herself seeing the concentrated scrunch of his dark brows, sharp jawline a little clenched as he parried another attack. His black hair was tied back with chunks of it falling over the frame of his face. "He does this every morning."
Yun hummed. "You like what you see?"
Kiku cleared her throat. "It's nice he's teaching his brother."
"Yeong should focus on his studies too but he keeps running to brother for more training," Nari said. "Yoongi never refuses. He likes training for no reason."
"Ever since father died, brother trains constantly. There's no war but he always says there might be danger," Yun said. "Even with your alliance, he's still weary." Nari quickly nudged her arm and for the first time, Yun felt a little uncomfortable.
Kiku pursed her lips together. She wondered if Yoongi was suspicious that her father would run an attack on them regardless of their alliance. While Kiku was a small risk to lose in the family, her father still may break the deal. She had little trust in her father and wouldn't be surprised if he wishes to prove some kind of point.
As she shifted in and out of her thoughts, Kiku saw Yoongi turn to notice them watching. Notice her watching. Kiku tried to look down at the wrapped silk dress in her arms, hoping it wouldn't look too suspicious. Yoongi turned to tell Yeong to take a break before making his way over to Kiku.
"Looks like your husband wishes to speak to you." Yun smirked, returning to her demeanour as if nothing happened. She pushed Nari towards Yeong to speak to him instead.
Yoongi raised his brow as his sisters rushed away. Beads of sweat had formed on his hairline as he met Kiku's gaze. "They didn't bother you too much?"
Kiku was shocked by what sounded like a genuine question. "No. They were lovely. They showed me around the main town."
"I can see that," Yoongi said before giving his sword away to a servant. "Come with me."
Kiku nodded and followed him out of the training grounds.
They moved from the training grounds back into the cluster of houses where the Min family resided. Yoongi escorted her to their personal house and Kiku wondered whether Yoongi wanted to pursue their marital duties now that he was given time.
It was strange but Kiku's heart pounded not quite out of fear or worry. It was simply curiosity and perhaps even a little excitement. Everything Yoongi had done so far was give her comfort.
As they entered the main house, a beautiful polished Koto stood in the living area.
Kiku's breath caught in her throat as she looked at the Koto which had beautiful ivory finishes and a soft chair to sit on while playing. "Is this for me?" she asked in a low tone.
"You said you used to play Koto. I figured you'd like to play in your free time," Yoongi said. "Your parents didn't pack much for your trip." He shrugged.
Kiku's lips parted as she reached out and touched the Koto. Memories of playing with her brother and learning every note with him burst in her like sweetness. Tears formed a thin gloss on her eyes, as she took a deep breath.
"Is it alright?" Yoongi asked.
"It's perfect," Kiku said. She turned and smiled. "Thank you. You didn't need to do that."
"It was nothing," Yoongi said. "It's your home now too."
Kiku nodded as her heart swelled.
"Also if my mother starts giving you too many lessons, I can get you a secret room."
Kiku let out a small chuckle. "It's okay. I'd like a lesson."
Yoongi pressed his lips together, a hint of a soft smile forming on his features which only made Kiku's heart warm.
-
Kiku's time in the Onyx Clan was far more pleasant and loving than she ever expected. Before she even realised, four months had passed. Kiku spent days with Yun and Nari, had meals with Hwayoung and then spent a quiet night with Yoongi. It was still innocent between the two of them but she enjoyed those quiet moments sharing things about their day. Yoongi still didn't speak on any personal things and Kiku didn't want to pry on how he got the scar on his eye or about his father's death. But it was still nice.
Kiku nearly forgot that she had another life prior to these few months. It was only when her younger brother, Haruki came to visit the clan. Discomfort returned to her chest, aching and making her twitch. She barely spoke to Haruki and every time they had a conversation, it was malicious. Haruki found joy in insulting her and demanding her to do things as a way to mimic their father.
Kiku reminded herself that she wasn't in that place anymore. This was her home too. She wore her new purple silk dress and pinned her hair up while the servants prepared a tea set on the floor table.
Haruki entered the private house as escorted by the servants. A childish grimace on his face as always but his chest puffed to look like father.
Kiku kept sited at the table.
Haruki stood over her for a few moments as if waiting for her to stand. "You wouldn't bother to see your brother at the border."
"You've come at a busy hour," Kiku said. Truthfully, she wanted to be in the warm comfort of her home to breathe easy and hide her shaking fingers. "What did you need?"
Haruki scoffed and sat down, tapping the side of the teacup. "Father's dead."
Kiku had little love for her father but she still sit in a moment of silence, unable to know what do with the news. "What happened?"
"We need more supplies," Haruki said, ignoring her question.
It was courtesy anyway so she didn't ask again. "The Moon clan has spare granaries for those occasions."
"We have an alliance." Haruki eyed her up and down. "I'd expect you to tend to it since you're clearly not tending to any children."
"What happened to the granaries, Haruki?" Kiku asked, emphasising his name.
Haruki pursed her lips, keeping his eyes on her gaze and waiting for her to look down. When she didn't, Haruki's face twitched. "We'd been using it."
"For what?"
"That's none of your concern," Haruki said.
"So not emergencies then," Kiku said.
"You can't speak to me that way." Haruki chuckled bitterly.
"I'm the Lady of this territory and your older sister, I can speak to you in whatever tone is necessary." Kiku narrowed her gaze. "What happened?"
Haruki tightened his jaw like a stubborn child. "We'd been taking from it for the banquets. Father and mother celebrated a lot because you were gone."
"And after brother's death," Kiku said.
"Don't talk about brother."
"He was my brother too. More a brother than you ever were."
Poison laced in his voice. "Kaito spent time with you because he felt bad for you. You were this pathetic thing crouching around everywhere. The only time people said anything nice about you was in order to fuck you. Don't pretend you were someone special to him or Yoongi." Haruki gestured to the door. "He's not even willing to put a baby in you." He chuckled.
"I don't appreciate being spoken for, Chief Min," Yoongi's deep voice shook through the room.
Haruki turned his head, expression turning sour.
Yoongi walked into the house, shadows forming harsh lines on his face as something dark flashes across his expression. For a moment, he looked like the exact nightmarish image of what the Moon clan thought of the Min family. Even barefooted steps added a heavy echo in the air that it sent chills down her own spine despite the fact she knew this demeanour wasn't for her intimidation. "You can have your supplies at the border."
Haruki deflated as if letting out a sigh of relief. "I should've gone to you first then, Chief. It seems I expected too much of my silly sister." He gave a triumphant smile to her.
"Of course, she made the mistake of thinking you were far too competent." Yoongi intertwined his fingers together, veined and hardened from training.
Haruki's expression turned again, cheeks reddening. "Excuse me?"
"Don't worry, I won't make that mistake." The corner of his mouth quirked up. "Perhaps we'll have a charity basket at the border."
Haruki stood to his feet quickly, shaking and trembling like a little boy. "You go too far."
"Do I? Because it seems as if you've come here asking for more than the agreed alliance and proceeding to disrespect my wife," Yoongi said. "The way I see it, giving you a charity basket is more mercy than you deserve currently. I suggest you take it quietly."
Haruki had all the inflated confidence their parents bloated into him from childhood. If he was even the slightest bit stupider, he would speak and in a brief second of that stupidity, he almost did. But then he glared at Kiku. "You'd let him talk to your family like that?"
Anger spread through her chest. Now he wanted to be family, when it benefited him. "If only you were true family then perhaps not."
Haruki grimaced, giving a softer glare to Yoongi before turning on his heel and stomping out of the house.
Kiku let out a deep, shaky breath as her spine began to ache from the tension. She closed her eyes and tried to catch her calm again, taking the scent of wood and warmth in her comfortable home. She heard Yoongi moving until she heard his hum right at her ear.
"Quite the unpleasant family you have," Yoongi mused.
Kiku couldn't help but let out a small, saddened chuckle. "Kaito was the only good one."
Yoongi turned and sat down next to her, shoulders pressed.
The heaviness gave Kiku a wave of comfort like the way his breath hit the back of his neck when they slept.
"If he comes again, I'll ask the guards to delegate him to me or my mother," Yoongi said. "There's no need for you to speak to them if you don't want to."
"You won't be burdened by them?" Kiku asked, turning her head and finding his face incredibly close.
"No one should speak like that to you especially not in our own house." Yoongi waved his hand.
Kiku smiled as her heart burst into little butterflies, creating a lump in her throat. She leaned in and pressed a small kiss on his cheek.
Yoongi turned his head just as Kiku was pulling away, their noses brushed against each other. Dark eyes pierced into her, keeping her still in her position even though her body ached for how close they were. Yoongi kissed her lips, shyly at first to help her adjust to the action.
The tantalizing warmth that passed through Kiku pushed her to lean into the kiss, cupping his cheek. Yoongi's hands held onto her lower back pulling her close until she was pressed flush against his chest.
His lips were hot against hers, keeping his grip on her firm but so soft and gentle. Yoongi only broke the kiss for a moment as Kiku caught a deep breath before pressing her lips again. She gripped onto the fabric of his shirt until Yoongi pulled her enough for her to straddle him completely.
Yoongi held her face in his hand, pausing their kiss again to move his lips down to her neck and jawline. Every ache that she felt from her encounter with Haruki melted away at his touch. He pulled at the pins of her hair, letting it fall down the trail of her back. His fingers traced the length of her spine, making her shiver. Tongue grazed over the soft spot on her neck as her hips began to sway against his own.
Yoongi let out a small groan, lifting his head up. His chest heaved in desperation, gripping onto her hair and keeping their foreheads pressed together.
Kiku reached in again but Yoongi kept her in place.
"Are you sure?" Yoongi asked in a rasped voice that made her tremble.
Kiku nodded. "I'm sure." She reached in and kissed him again, deeper and pleading to ensure he knew this was what she wanted.
But a knock on the door startled them.
Yoongi let out a small, frustrated sigh. "What is it?" he asked.
Kiku got off his lap slowly with a clear of her throat, trying to fix her hair as the door opened to a servant.
"Sorry, sire. Your mother needs your audience for something." The servant kept their head bowed as if already knowing the position he could've caught them in.
Yoongi turned and gave Kiku a soft look.
Kiku gave a reassuring smile, patting his arm before he got to his feet and walked away. Leaving her heart pounding manically.
-
Another week passed since their kiss. Yoongi wasn't distant necessarily but it did feel like nothing changed. Kiku wondered perhaps he didn't enjoy it. He was the Chief and had many choices of his own. Kiku was an alliance marriage. Any affection that they developed may have just been a spur of the moment as they lived under the same roof. Despite all the explanations she's made in her head, it still twinged something in Kiku. With the kindness received from Yoongis family, she imagined that something would be wrong. She traded a kinder family for a husband that didn't quite enjoy her affection. She'd take it though.
This morning, the family sat around the table for breakfast. Yoongi gave her a glance here and there but it was still distant. Kiku tried to smile back but he immediately looked away.
"So Kiku has been immensely calm these past few days," Yun said, a smirk playing on her lips. "Ma says it's often a sign of...something on the way." Her eyes flickered down to gesture to her stomach.
Kiku's cheeks burned, stammering. "No, it's not that." She shook her head. "I had my bleeding." She couldn't quite hide the slight disappointment in her tone. Kiku never thought about children especially with the experiences she had with her own family. But something about the silence from Yoongi made grasp at unnecessary desires of children or anything to melt off the ice between them.
Yun hummed, pouting. "That's a shame, I wanted nieces and nephews." She poked at her food, the light breeze making strands of her dark hair dance.
"Don't pressure them," Nari said, her tone serious. "They need to be relaxed when they do it."
"Girls, quiet." Hwayoung narrowed her gaze, letting out a defeated sigh. "Don't listen to them." She smiled. "These things take time."
Yoongi stayed silent and Kiku herself couldn't find anything to say but give a reassuring smile. Even though she worried Yoongi won't come near her a second time.
-
Kiku played her Koto in the afternoon while Yoongi was out supervising the patrol. Usually it would take him till evening to come back. But today he came in early, stomping and breathing out with frustration. A strange sight from someone who was so calm. Raven black hair glistened from sweat, patches of dust latched onto his skin and his jaw terribly tightened as if it might make break his teeth.
Strangely enough, it was relieving to see some emotion in Yoongi after all the distance. Kiku stood from the Koto. "What's wrong?" She asked gently.
"Your damn brother," he seethed. "His men attacked one of my scouts." Yoongi poured water into a goblet and chugged it.
Kiku's heart dropped. "What?"
"Apparently they'd been disturbing the peace. But they didn't plan for me to come." His scar looked deeper and darker when he was angry. "Mother was weary about them for a while but I didn't think they'd stoop to petty little violence."
Kiku lowered her head, almost in shame. Even though she felt more connected to Yoongi's family, her name and identity was still attached to the people she grew up with. It was embarrassing seeing others witness the pettiness that she endured her whole life. The same pettiness that Kaito hated. "I'm sorry," she said.
Yoongi stilled for a moment, dark brows furrowed as he turned to Kiku. "Why're you apologizing?"
Kiku stammered. "It's my family. They're like this, our parents made you all seem like monsters and Haruki would do anything to make himself feel like father would be proud." She shook her head.
"Well, that's their mistake, not yours." Yoongi spoke under her breath but Kiku clung to every word and kept it close to her chest.
She reached out and touched his arm. "Is there anything I can do?"
Yoongi stared at her deeply and so long that Kiku felt like layers of her soul were being peeled. Then he broke the gaze and tried to walk back to their bedroom. "No, it's okay."
Kiku's stomach clenched as once again, the ice began to form. But this time she wasn't going relent quietly. "Yoongi, you don't have to protect my feelings. If this is too much of a burden to you then I can leave."
Yoongi stopped, looking over his shoulder to her. The expression on his face, harsh. "What?"
Kiku dug her nails into her palms to give herself some form of strength. "I can handle my family, I've lived with them my whole life. But...I don't want you to be married to someone you don't truly want."
Yoongi's throat bobbed up and down. "Is that what you think?"
"I don't know," she spoke honestly. "I just know that you became distant after what happened and I—I'm unsure."
Yoongi fully turned his body around, stepping closer. "If you're unsure, then you talk to me."
"I can't speak my wishes so easily." Kiku's voice lowered as he moved closer until she could catch wafts of the forest from him. "It's not something I'm used to."
Yoongi's expression softened. He rubbed in between his brows. "I'm a little too used to my family just saying what they think." He looked up to her. "I'm sorry. I should've checked on you."
Kiki's stomach felt warm. staying silent for a moment just to ensure what she heard was right. Then she spoke in a small voice. "It's okay."
Yoongi took her hand in his, intertwining their fingers together turning her world into a burst of stars. "I will not make you go back to that place again." He muttered. "I want you here."
"You want me here?" She asked again, just to hear him say it so it could echo inside her whenever darker voices grew too loud.
"Right here. With me." Yoongi tightened his hold. "Will you do that?"
Kiku nodded, a burning behind her eyes. "I will, I promise." She smiled, touching his chest to make herself feel grounded again.
"We still need to deal with your stupid brother," Yoongi said. "He's quickly turning into a pest than an ally."
Kiku could spend years imagining Haruki as this invincible monster, similar to when they were children. But this was real now. Haruki wasn't Kaito. He was stupid and petty even when he tried to hurt her. There were a million ways to get rid of people like that. "I might have an idea."
-
As Kiku requested, Yoongi organized a meeting at the border between Onyx and Moon territory. A canopy was erected with a floor table where they all sat together. The edge of dawn painted the mountains and tree in a burnished gold and the scent of morning dew was the only comfort in Kiku's pool of anxiety.
She was prepared for this meeting and the decisions entailed but rarely had she spoken up to Haruki before. When Kiku tried, her mother or father would reprimand and punish her.
Even as Haruki walked to the canopy, she felt a prickle of being scolded in a few minutes. But she had push it down. She wasn't Haruki's sister here, she was a Lady of the Onyx Clan. The Chief's wife.
"This pompous meeting surely isn't about the little scuffle between scouts," Haruki said. "It's a bit of harmless fun."
Yoongi stayed silent.
"You brought your wife here too," Haruki looked Kiku up and down, making sure that he used a moniker disconnected to him.
"In regards to your previous demands, we're suggesting some changes in the alliance." Yoongi kept a calm tone even though Kiku saw the tightened grip of his hands.
Haruki chuckled. "If you don't want her anymore, just kick her out." He waved his hand. "One of your servants can have her."
Yoongi narrowed his gaze but kept his neutral expression. "As you commented on our child before, we had an idea on how to strength the bond between clans."
"And how is that?" he asked.
"Since you require our food supplies which we give to you out of kindness, we have a compromise," Yoongi said. "In exchange for our food, any child born from my wife will take the Chiefs title of the Moon clan."
Haruki's brows furrowed as his chest heaved. His glare turned to Kiku. "You put him up to this, didn't you, you bitch?"
"It was a joint decision," Kiku said, maintaining her calm demeanour. She was used to his insults. She wouldn't let it hurt her again.
"I won't agree to this, it's stupid." Haruki winced.
"Very well," Yoongi said. "Then I suggest you get your defences ready."
"What?"
"Your father must've told you how the Onyx Clan works." Yoongi began to muse and there was something... oddly satisfying about the tone. "My wolves haven't been out for a feed in a while."
"You'd attack your ally?" Haruki asked.
"Attacking my scout and disrespecting the Chiefs wife constitutes that you are breaking every rule in the alliance," Yoongi said and Haruki stayed quiet. "Giving you an alternate compromise is a mercy. I suggest you consider it. My soldiers won't care if you're a spoiled Chief who can't carry a sword properly."
Haruki grimaced, chin quivering in frustration. He looked over at Kiku, as if trying to get ready for another insult but he knew it was too late. Kiku was no longer the target to point insults at. One wrong move and Haruki loses his head along with the Moon Clan. This way they can keep their lives. Haruki was stupid but he was still too scared to die. "Fine. I accept your terms."
Yoongi hummed. "Thank you." He stood up and held onto Kiku's hand, helping her to her feet.
"What would've Kaito said about you turning your back on family?" Haruki asked, cutting into her in a place that ached like a thousand knives.
Kiku paused in place, gripping onto Yoongi's hand like her life depended on it as her heart panged in pain. Haruki knew nothing about what Kaito was like. It took her every strength and hope in her body not to throw scalding tea in his face for even insinuating that Kiku would do something to disappoint Kaito. Because Kaito wasn't like that. Kaito understood and listened. Haruki was a fool. Kiku straightened her posture, turned and looked Haruki straight in the eye. "Kaito wouldn't have caused a food shortage in the clan."
Haruki scoffed, pursing his lips together.
"Kaito did his duty, as I am. From where I'm looking, I'm not the one who made father die from disappointment." Kiku felt like a dam burst inside her as she let the words flow but seeing the Haruki's sour and pouty expression made it all worth it.
-
Kiku was able to breathe easy when they returned to their tent for the night. She walked over to her vanity and her maid immediately began taking pins out of her hair. She watched from the mirror as Yoongi unlatched his sword sheathe of his waist and began to pour himself a drink. The dark furrow of his brows prominent. Kiku raised a hand and smiled at the maid. "A moment, please."
The maid bowed and did as she asked, stepping out of the tent to give them privacy. Kiku took out the rest of the pins so her hair was fully open and relaxed. A dull throb formed on her scalp. She stood and made her way to Yoongi as he leaned forward on the table.
"He can be a lot to tolerate," Kiku said.
Yoongi took in a deep breath to calm himself down. "The way he talks to you, it's like you're complete strangers. Enemies, even."
Kiku swallowed the small lump in her throat. It was always normal to her, seeing the way family treated the one they didn't want with the exception of Kaito. But Yoongi valued family with his life. She could only imagine the kind of shock thrumming through him. "You have a good family. Some don't." She touched his arm. "But sometimes you find a better one."
Yoongi turned his head, his once sharp eyes now softened and sad. "If I've ever made you feel—"
"Not once." Kiku knew it like the breath she took. Yoongi and his family had been nothing but comforting and kind. She reached and pressed her forehead against his. It was almost involuntary but feeling him lean into it was the only answer she needed to keep still.
Yoongi turned his body slowly, letting their chest flush against one another before he leaned and placed a gentle kiss on her lips. His warm hand cupped her cheek softly like she was precious. He pulled away only to press kisses on her cheek and jawline, taking her into an embrace. He buried his face into the crook of her neck where the scent of jasmines wafted in his nose.
Kiku could fall asleep in this embrace. Her body and mind and every bruise in her heart soothed from the loving touch. She traced her fingers across the strands of his hair as if lulling the both of them to dreams. It was difficult to admit it in the past few months with the new changes and confusion. But today for the first time, she could surely say it.
Kiku felt loved.
-
The meeting had left Kiku and Yoongi tired for the evening. They rested their heads, nestled close as they tried to sleep. Tried was an effort Kiku persisted on as the hours went by. It wasn't quite a terrible night of troubling thoughts but an eagerness. She opened her eyes to see Yoongi with his eyes calmly closed, his lips a little puckered.
Kiku took a moment to watch him, reaching out a little to touch his cheek. He stirred slightly at her touch, but his eyes remained closed, his breathing steady and rhythmic. She pulled away with a defeated sigh, not wanting to wake him up. So she turned around and tried to drift off to sleep again.
It was only a few minutes later then she felt Yoongi shift, moving closer until his chest was pressed right against her back. His arm laid over her body, embracing her from behind. Kiku felt a wave of warmth and comfort wash over her as Yoongi tightened his hold.
"Can't sleep?" Yoongi asked.
Kiku hummed. "A little. It's okay, go back to sleep."
"I can be awake," Yoongis voice rasped as his face buried into the crook of her neck again. He began pressing kissing down the length of her shoulder. "Do you want me to be awake?"
Kiku smiled to herself, swaying her hips against him. "A little."
Yoongi chuckled lightly, the vibrations made her quiver in delight. He made Kiku lay on her back, climbing on top of her and sneaking between her legs. "Are you sure?" He whispered.
Kiku nodded. "I'm sure." She smiled against his lips before pressing a kiss on his bottom lip.
Yoongi kissed down the length of her neck, unravelling his night clothes and pushing up Kikus soft dress. He entered her gently, her snug walls hugging his tip before he kept pushing.
Kiku gripped onto his clothing as the sensation made her tremble under him. She swayed her hips with his movements, encouraging him to move faster. The ache was slight but the tingle of pleasure sent her into a slight dizziness. She wrapped her legs around his waist.
Yoongi brushed his fingers across her hairline, full of affection as he moved deeper inside her. He pressed sweet kisses at the corner of her lips.
Kiku smiled feverishly as the pleasure sent heat through her body, radiating like steam and intoxication.
Yoongi made sure he was slow, not just to be careful but to draw out this intimacy for as long as he could. The feeling of embrace brought back every slight desire he had in the past few months to hold or touch her. "Feel good?"
Kiku nodded, letting out a slight whimper as he continued to move at that tantalizing pace. "Good." She traced her thumb across his cheek. Strands of his hair falling over his face, curtaining over hers. Her core became slick with arousal, creating light squelch sounds as he thrusted into her with a new desperation.
His release clouded him, flooding him with an unbearable warmth until he grind himself into her. He muffled his moan against her neck.
Kiku felt his lower belly press on her sensitive spot, making her clench around him, pushing him further into his climax.
Yoongi lifted himself up, foreheads layered with sweat as they pressed against each other.
Kiku took his lips into a kiss, surging him to thrust into a steady pattern that made her lose breath. She gripped onto the side of his neck as moans broke through any form of whisper.
Yoongi quickened his pace following the pattern of her moans and the rolling of his own release. Then the sweet burst into a ricochet of pleasure and heat.
Kiku smiled, breathless as she relished in the warmth filling her. As Yoongi kept moving, he snuck his head in between her legs, targeting her sensitive spot and pushing her to the edge. Kiku's brows furrowed, aching to reach her own climax as she was full of him. Her breathing turned to quickened whimpers as she squirmed under his touch. Her back arched, head thrown back giving Yoongi the chance to kiss her neck and jawline.
Her climax bloomed, the heat of it shaking her limbs and forcing her legs to shut around him. Yoongi kissed her forehead, still rubbing on that spot until she twitched against it.
Kiku whimpered, pushing his hand away. A small laugh left his lips fuelling her with more delight. It was the most wonderful feeling she had to be embraced like this so warmly and the bliss of pleasure melting her body until she was meshed with the bed itself.
"You feel sleepier now?" Yoongi watched her with his own half-lidded, blissed eyes.
Kiku smiled as her breathing turned slow and calm. "Mhm." She traced her fingers down his cheek. "I think I've officially become your wife."
"Oh?" Yoongi's brow raised. "You weren't before?"
Kiku chuckled, slapping his chest playfully. "I mean we don't have anything to hide anymore."
Yoongi caged her in with his arms, making her feel safe and secure. "No, we don't."
Kiku blinked slowly, her finger moved gently to his scar. "Like this?"
Yoongi's expression softened into a mix of ruminating vulnerability and an old sadness that had been repeatedly reminisced. He lay down next to her, shoulders pressed flush. "My father and I go on small trips every now and then. He used to do it with every child, just to. . .talk, connect with nature and spend time." He waved his hand. "It was strange for Chiefs to do it but he said it was because he never got to speak to his own father. So, he wanted to make sure we weren't. . .without one." He let out a long breath.
"He sounds like a good father," Kiku said.
"He was." Yoongi's dark eyes melted and glossed from emotion. "One day though, bandits were prowling in the place my father and I camped. They attacked us. I got this from one of the bandits." He pointed to the scar. "Before my father told me to run while he fended them off. I called my mother and some guards to help but we were too late."
Kiku shifted and rubbed his chest. "Is that why you train so much?"
Yoongi nodded. "I want to make sure Yeong and the girls know how to defend themselves or others should the need arise." He took a deep breath, playing with Kiku's hair. "But I had a good family. We took care of each other, just like we'll take care of you."
Kiku smiled, resting her chin on his chest. "I'll take care of you all too. I still owe you a massage."
"You gave me a pretty good one a minute ago." Yoongi smirked.
Kiku chuckled. "A proper massage."
-
Kiku and Yoongi returned to the main houses early in the morning as the soft gold of dawn painted the forest. Hwayoung had lunch prepared with the rest of the family to welcome them home. Fresh steamed fish with tofu, rice porridge and some fresh fruits newly picked from the farms. Kiku ate happily, her appetite had grown in the months she was with this family but it made her all the more energetic and vibrant along with her excitement from the past night's events.
Something the family noticed more than Kiku realised.
Yun, in particular, stared the two of them a little too closely with a smirk. "So how was the trip, brother?" She asked in a sing-song voice.
Yoongi's eyes flickered up as he paused mid-bite. "As most political talks go with a spoiled brat of a Chief. He gave into the deal quickly," he spoke in a slightly formal tone.
Kiku quietly sipped on the last drops of her tea before he gently poured her another cup. She gave him a shy smile.
"I haven't heard much about the prospects of the Chiefs of the Moon clan but the younger son is usually unprepared," Hwayoung said thankfully to distract from what Yun actually wanted to ask.
Yeong stammered just as he took a bite of his food, looking at Hwayoung with a pout. "What'd I do?"
Hwayoung raised her hand. "I mean, generally. Not you."
Yoongi let out a small chuckle under his breath. "She means you."
Yeong sighed, pointing at him with his chopsticks. "I've beaten you in sword training before, I'll do it again."
"Did you do anything else in the trip?" Yun asked, with a wide grin, leaning forward in excitement. "You were both alone for the night. And Kiku's been. . .glowing."
Kiku's cheeks burned, clearing her throat. "I—I don't—"
"You need to stop obsessing over your brother's marriage, sweetheart, it's getting strange." Hwayoung patted the back of Yun's hand.
"It's only because you don't let me get married." Yun leaned back on her chair, folding her arms over her chest.
"Mother's protecting the men of the clan," Nari said, raising a brow.
Yun slapped Nari's arm as Yeong snorted.
"See how they bully me?" Yun asked Kiku.
Kiku chuckled, biting down her bottom lip and glancing at Yoongi. Often when she had terrible encounters with Haruki, she would get scolded by her family and live with the suffocating feeling of frustration in her chest.
Today was the first time, Kiku could cling to the happy moments and forget about Haruki or any of this harsh words. Her family threw her to the Onyx clan like a bait at the end of a fishing line but in their hatred for her, Kiku found love for her own. 
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Foreign Feelings
Pairing: Anakin(rots)XFem!reader
Summary: All the smut and little plot 😝
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Warnings~ NSFW, 18+, minors DNI, oral sex (M!receiving), hair pulling, dirty talking, praise kink, dom/sub dynamics
Credit: This is my own spin off to a story I read on here and I can’t find the story again, so please, please text me for inspo credit!
P.S. Also this is my first story since I started up writing again! Please feel free to send me a DM with suggestions or advice! Banner at the end by @cafekitsune Enjoy!!
Word count: 1.6K
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I’ve never done this before,"
You admitted lowly, the rush of adrenaline pulsing through your veins as you sank to your knees on Anakin’s bedroom floor. Panic and excitement warred within you, mingling with a heady anticipation of the unknown. As you both surrendered to the electric tension that had been building between you, a whirlwind of thoughts raced through your mind - are you ready to embrace the unknown, or are you merely a passenger on this journey of forbidden desire?
Amidst the chaos of your emotions, one thing remains clear - in this moment, you feel truly alive. Being naked and this vulnerable in front of Anakin was not only a new experience but a thrilling one as well. His thumb traced your bottom lip as he let you wrestle his pants off. The riveting touch of his rough fingers against your skin sends shivers down your spine, igniting a firestorm of desire that threatens to consume you whole. As his tongue glides along his bottom lip, you find yourself mesmerized by the raw intensity of his gaze. Those eyes, his enchanting blue eyes, stare down at you. The heat of his glare sends a rush of heat flooding your cheeks, a flush of arousal steadily boiling within you.
Every word that leaves your lips seems to fan the flames of desire kindling within him.
He needed you.
"You'll be perfect, y/n— Just—"
His words trailed off into a low, deep growl but the heat in his eyes spoke volumes as your hand tentatively wrapped around him. Butterflies flutter in your stomach, a mix of nervousness and desire churning within you. He rolled his head back and took a deep breath. As his hand tangles in your hair, you feel a surge of heat radiating from his touch, a tangible reminder of the burning hunger simmering between you. The urgency in his actions sends a thrill racing down your spine, a heady mixture of fervor and anxiety pooling in the pit of your stomach as he pushes you closer to his pulsing cock.
"Mmm," Anakin's mouth betrayed him as you took his tip into your wet lips. The sweetness of his precum traveled through your tastebuds as you swirled around him, trying to take more of him in. Your thoughts clouded quickly as you let yourself fall into your own sense of pleasure. His cock made your mouth feel full and warm as his hand in your hair guided you.
Your eyes glanced up to catch a glimpse of the lovely Jedi; his stomach flexed with sweat glistening on his bare skin, and his mouth was agape with surprise. The feeling of seeing him surprised by something you’re doing to him made your core tighten, and you used the feeling of satisfaction to push your throat deeper around his cock.
“That’s it, fuck, that’s it,” his tone was smooth and it rang through your ears, erupting a small chill to travel down your back. The scruff of his pubes grazed your lip as his hair-wrapped hand held your head firmly in place. Your throat started to contract, begging you for air as lines of drool trailed from the corners of your mouth. A sound came from your throat you’d never heard before, and his grip tightened on your hair. He quickly yanked you off of him, oxygen filling your lungs with a sharp stab. Coughing and trying to catch your breath you look up at him, unsure of what had gone wrong.
"What? What’s wrong?” You questioned him, worried you had somehow messed up.
“What happened?" You clutched your hands to his thighs as you stared intently, searching his face for an answer. Had you done something wrong? Did you mess up? Your thoughts filled with worry.
His eyes darkened with desire, cloudy with unspoken longing, while his mouth remained slightly open in awe. You observed, a pang of uncertainty gnawing at your insides as you met his gaze.
Doubt and desire knotted within you as you awaited his next move. His hand still buried in your hair as he chuckled deep and lowly, his voice sounding of the harshest silk.
"You said this was your first time?" He questioned.
You nodded your head in agreement.
'How is that possible?' He thought to himself, 'I felt the back of her throat. I felt it. She didn’t fight when I forced her to stay choking.'
His thoughts ran wild with excitement as his hand pulled tightly at your hair, his next words came out… well, in no other way than demanding.
"Open."
he commanded, sending a jolt of electricity coursing through you as you obediently complied. You had no reason not to oblige as you opened your mouth, letting your tongue drape across your bottom lip. With each breathless moment that passes, you find yourself teetering on the edge of surrender, torn between the intoxicating pull of desire and the lingering echoes of hesitation. He began smacking his tip on your tongue, a wet thwacking sound filling his small chamber.
“Just-Relax” His voice was sweet yet held a sternness to it.
His mouth slowly parted as he let his cock enter your mouth ever so slightly just to pull it back out, raking it across your soaking tongue. His other hand gripped his robe tightly, trying to keep it on his chest and out of your way.
“You know you messed up,” Anakin let his hips rock slowly into you, small groans leaving his plump lips in between his words.
“Now that I know you can take me, you’re never leaving my sight,”
The words left his lips and flowed through the air like a cold breeze on a hot day, it made goosebumps trickle all over your body.
The taste of his cock was foreign to your tastebuds; you weren’t sure how to feel about the new taste. Anakin's grip on your hair tightened as he guided you to take his full length into your throat once again. This time was harder than the last; it was like he grew in the small amount of time he wasn’t in your mouth. Disregarding your attempts to breathe, he held you firmly, staring down at you. His eyes clouded with lust as his mouth continued to murmur slurs one after the other.
"Fuck. Mmm shit… yes, like that, such a good girl," He could feel every time your throat retracted; it was sending him over the edge as he let himself sit in the back of your throat. He roughly started thrusting his hips into your face, getting as deep into your throat as he could before quickly pulling off again. As he exited your mouth you let out a deep cough, drool still pooling down your chin and covering your neck. You tried taking multiple breaths to regain some composure, but Anakin didn’t want to see you composed.. no, quite the opposite, he wanted to see you completely overwrought and undone.
Without warning, his firm grasp on your hair forces you back onto his member with relentless urgency. Leaving you no time to prepare as he fucked your throat at an impatient pace. When he wasn’t holding his cock as deep as it would get in the back of your throat, he was holding you tightly in place as he rocked his hips into you, desperately trying to chase his climax.
Your eyes burned with tears, and your throat cried for some kind of release. Your gags and chokes were sounds of unholy scripture to his ears and it gave him exactly what he needed to release deep into your throat. He threw his head back as his groans rippled deep, he practically growled your name out.
It didn’t take much for you to swallow his load, he was so deep into your throat it was practically in your stomach by the time it exited him. Even after his release, his hand stayed firmly grasped to the back of your head, not letting you move an inch off of his cock as he pulsed in your mouth.
“Oh yeah, you’re mine,”
Anakin’s words were hazy to your ears as his chest heaved with deep labored breaths. Your arms shot up to his thighs, trying to push off; your lungs begging for oxygen and your body reacting to its signals. He refused to release his grip for what seemed like an eternity, though in reality, only a few seconds had passed as he kept you in place.
With a forceful tug, he pulled your head back, tilting your face up to meet his gaze. Your face was covered in spit and tears. He thought you had never looked more beautiful, never more stunning than right now. His chest continued heaving as he dropped his robe down, his other hand remaining firmly around your hair. Your eyes flickered up to his as you tried desperately to catch your breath. Anakin had never looked more extraordinary in your eyes, the sweat glistening off his eyebrows as his lips curved into a delicious smirk.
The smirk deepened as he surveyed the masterpiece he had created on your face, a scene straight out of a movie, one he couldn’t take his eyes off. Anakin’s eyes dancing with ecstasy, his breaths coming in ragged gasps as he tried to slow his heart rate.
“Your mouth will only ever know my dick,” He said proudly.
“Do you understand?” His words echoed in your mind, a heady mix of validation and vulnerability washing over you in waves as he used his now free hand to caress your liquid-covered cheeks.
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daemonwhitedove · 1 month
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𝐒𝐖𝐄𝐀𝐑 𝐈𝐓.
Pairing: Daemon Targaryen x Reader
Prior to the Dance of the Dragon, the vow between Daemon and his paramour lingered without knowing if it will last.
Inspired by the Song of Achilles, Patrochilles. Credit to Madeline Miller for the quote.
fanfiction | House of the Dragon
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When Rhaenyra had received the tidings of Lucerys' demise, she crumpled at her place, unable to rein in her sorrow. The passing of her offspring, now her cherished child that she held so close to her heart. All hastened to her side, tending to her as she sought solace in her chamber.
The remnants of the young boy and his dragon washed ashore on Dragonstone.
Dread seized you as you bathed in the balmy waters. You chewed at your lower lip, grappling with the impending storm that loomed over all. None shall emerge unscathed. The dragons shall clash and waltz until one prevails and the other succumbs.
The downfall of the dragons was imminent.
Lost in reverie, you failed to perceive the door creaking open, heralding the entrance of the man. Only when his hand alighted on your shoulder did you startle with a soft gasp.
"'It is me, my love." His rich voice banished the tumultuous thoughts. You lifted your gaze to meet his, discerning the unease mirrored in his eyes; he too foresaw the looming conflict.
A hush fell upon you both as you reclined against his embrace, swallowing the lump formed in your throat. You prayed that neither of you shall meet a grim fate. The throne could fall to the Greens, yet your sole concern was your beloved.
Daemon tenderly kissed your temple. "You are tense," he observed, caressing your shoulder blade. "Tell me your worries." A gentle plea. He had never been unkind to you. Never.
You spoke, "Daemon, war is on the coming. Lucerys shall be avenged one way or another, and I dread it shall claim us both." The chamber was filled with a hushed breeze, engulfing the palpable tension and fear that gripped you so tightly. The water now felt icy to the touch, unlike its previous warmth, unlike his touch.
The Prince remained silent, pressing another kiss on your temple. After a pause, he murmured, "In the end, we all meet our demise, my love. Such fears need not consume you. War was inevitable when that drunk cunt of a king seized Rhaenyra's throne in our absence." Yet his words failed to offer solace as intended.
Turning towards him, you twisted your body to face his. Tears once concealed now brimmed in your eyes as you clasped his hands. "I care not for the Greens or the throne. Death does not faze me. It is our parting that I dread. I cannot bear to be parted from you, plagued daily by fear for our safety." Your words were a soft whisper, tinged with regret at the tremor in your voice. How could you rein in your emotions when his life hung by a thread much like yours?
The Prince knelt closer, his eyes reflecting a love unmatched. "The gods are cruel. They shall never grant you lasting joy and triumph."
Drawing nearer, relishing his words, you leaned into his gaze.
"I'll tell you a secret" he raised your chin, locking eyes with you. "I shall be the first." Boldness shimmered in his gaze, deepening your affection for him. "Swear it."
"Why me?"
"You are the reason. Swear it."
Enveloped in fervent love and unwavering devotion to him, you uttered a vow that would alter your lives forever. "I swear it."
A grin played upon his lips.
"I feel like I could eat the world raw."
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anachilles · 27 days
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i just love the thought of buck absolutely mcfuckin’ losing it.
in lust? in anger? in any other display of pure emotion? a combination of all three, as a little treat? who knows!
so stoic, so buttoned up, so perfectly in control of himself. every move and every word thought about, because what good has acting or speaking rashly or panicking ever done him? anyone, for that matter?
it’s a mask, though. a coping strategy, trauma response, whatever you want to call it. still himself, technically, but a perfectly manufactured shroud for every other part of himself to hide beneath. because still waters run deep.
so he buries and represses and bottles it all up in the base of his chest, grits his teeth, and carries on. turns the valve sometimes when the pressure’s mounting and lets a little slip out, but never enough to fully relieve it.
during and after the war though, that takes its toll. which is why bucky pushes and prods and provokes him when he can see plain as day the pent up feeling is starting to eat away at him. a biting joke here, a pointed but unprovoked question there. not letting up when he’s shirked off, because buck needs that.
the other men - boys, some of them - revere him. bucky doesn’t. well, he does. in his own way. reveres him in the cut of his mouth as it drags along the dip in his collarbone, the line of his hip, or the crease of his thigh. but he reveres all that of gale, his gale, the man, rather than the great and hallowed major ‘buck’ cleven.
so, when the other man so clearly needs it (and even sometimes when he doesn’t really, but bucky’s also a little shit) he pushes and prods and provokes when it’s needed. and sometimes buck just… loses it. and releases all that pressure like a soda bottle that bucky’s just taken, shaken up, then ripped the lid off.
you can treat someone lovingly without handling ‘em with kid gloves.
raw emotion, heated words, scrabbling hands, his distinctive western rasp almost a growl, teeth sometimes.
and bucky loves it.
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your-nanas-house · 4 months
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I'm pretty sure you're mine
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◇ Pairing: Sub!William Killick X dom fem!Reader
◇ Warnings: smut, disappointment, friends to lovers, choking, slapping, edging, raw sex/creampie, sadness and lust, shitty writing (sorry I'm pretty sick and struggled a bit)
◇ Summary: William meets his childhood friend again, after a promise he did before the war.
◇ Note: Sorry for the mistakes and the English. Inspired by one of the latest and wonderful works of @pinguwrites
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"William—" her voice came out as a whisper as her eyes remained on her loving childhood friend, who was busy apparently flirting with a brunette woman.
He turned around, licking his lips in confusion but kind of joy— a joy that vanished as soon as he saw the hurt face of who used to be his Y/n.
She left him no time to say hello, ask questions, or give an explanation— even though it was ages since they saw each other and she was really eager to meet him again after all they had been through.
It didn't happened though, not like she planned.
Y/n always imagined their reunion to be more romantic, full with joy and cries and passion— not sadness and disappointment.
She rushed out of the pub where they were, pushing the door open before running away the fastest she could, leaving the young man confused and sad at the entrance.
.
A couple of days later, someone knocked at the door of the house she was staying in and thinking that it was probably the owner or someone important, she opening it just to be face to face with William.
Neither of them spoke for a couple of seconds, they just kept looking at each other, taking in all the changes that were visible on their bodies— before she made an attempt to close the door.
William's feet quickly stopped her action, opening the door again and walking in as soon as she rushed away, heading with an angry gait to the living room— so that she could continue to prepare her suitcases.
"Y/n" William's voice broke the silence taking her slightly by surprise, it had become deeper and his accent was still present, if she wasn't that mad she would have probably begged him to speak to her all day long.
Distracted by his voice, she didn't realize that the man had moved and was now standing behind her with a very worried look.
Her body became still as soon as William rested his hand carefully on her shoulder, she turned slowly her head to meet his piercing baby blue eyes— waiting for him to talk, to say anything.
"Why are you here?" William asked, leaking of words. His words kept echoing in Y/n's head as she stared how blankly at his handsome face
"Why am I here?" Repeats, anger slowly building up, her movements become more nervous and fast as she kept packing her things.
"Yes—" he started, taken aback by her sudden motion, her finger pointing at his chest "I'm here because I wanted to see you again, I waited for you to come back to me after war but nothing!" she revealed breathing heavily.
Y/n didn't let William open his mouth again.
Her hand pushed against his chest, making him stumble against the nearest surface
"I came here ready to see you again, to be with you and start something like we promised each other and there you are, flirting with another woman" she murmured, staring at him with a lot of emotions in her eyes.
William's heart skipped a beat as his stomach sinked. She was mad. But, she had every right to be.
She returned to a man who had changed and seemingly moved on from the past. She had a right to be mad.
William swallowed down, his gut instinct to defend himself disappearing as he stared at her, his mouth almost unable to form words.
"You have nothing to say?" She asked incredulously, her eyes narrowing even more
"I..I..." he stammered out, his tongue tied. It feels like he couldn't find the proper words, as if every time he opened his mouth to speak they only stumble out as gibberish.
His heart raced as frustration mounts against himself for what had become of the situation. She was rightfully angry at him, but now he found himself unable to even answer the question posed to him.
"The cat got your tongue, William?" She asked, framing his body with hers, almost giving an energy of superiority and dominance.
He stared with wide eyes, shocked but at the same time intrigued by the sudden position.
He couldn't feel the heat of her body pressed against his, the sensation sending waves of heat through his body. Her smell was different then he remembered, not sweet and innocent like it used to be but— nicer.. more mature.
It was almost as if she was designed to distract him.
Y/n's eyes scanned his body as she bit softly her bottom lip in thought.
His breath caught in his chest, feeling the butterflies rush to his stomach, his body nearly shivering as she moves closer.
His hands suddenly rise, his body shifted so he was better framed by hers.
William stared at her, knowing that they both felt the heat rising.
They both let out a soft sigh before their lips connected in a passionate and fiercely kiss.
He suddenly wrapped his hands around her waist, his fingers interlocking together, pulling her in as he kisses her.
Her arms hugging his neck forcefully, holding him closer to her.
The passion and heat that erupted between them was utterly exhilarating, but at the same time there was a certain intimacy about the kiss— as well as repressed feelings and hidden emotions.
His tongue swirled around hers, and he felt her body pressed up against his during the kiss, the heat and tension nearly unbearable.
Y/n pushed him against the wall, pulling softly at his locks as she broke the kiss
"Tell me you're still mine" she whispered against his lips, her nose brushing his as she waited for a reply, her eyes closed.
A deep moan erupted from William's throat, his body nearly trembling beneath her— his lips parted and the words barely managed to utter themselves from his mouth
"I'm still yours.." he whispered, and kisses her again.
She returned the kiss, leading him to the bedroom of the house while she started to undress him— he was still in a state of shock that this was happening, but the heat that he felt rise through him as she lead him to the bedroom was undeniable.
Her hands moved to undo his buttons, her breath on his neck, hot and desperate, and the heat of her body rising up through his own.
It was almost as if she was designed to steal away his breath, and his body responded in turn without hesitation.
And in a quick motion he was now laying on the bed, Y/n towering over him while she kicked off her boots.
William kept watching her with anticipation as he laid there, his own hands move to undo his pants, pulling them off one as he watches her remove her blouse.
It felt as if time had melted away for William.
Time no longer held any sway over him, it was just the two of them together; her hands on his body, her lips on his, her breath against his skin.
He suddenly leaned forward and kissed her again deeply, pulling her body to rest upon his.
His hand wandered lower, taking a handful of her ass, earning a harsh slap from her
"I don't think you understand who's in control right now, baby boy" Y/n murmured, her nails digging in the flesh of his chin as she held it still, making William whine softly.
The sudden slap earned a jolt of shock from him and the burning remained a reminder.
This had always been the underlying dynamic between the two of them and the sudden harshness from her now was utterly unexpected— it felt like this wasn't the same girl he used to fool around with, her confidence drowing him almost as if she had been the one who had gone to war.
Her nails scraped at his chin harder, and the sudden rush of heat sent shivers all through his body.
William just nodded breathless, his eyes watching her carefully as his body didn't dare to move
"Will you be a good boy, William? My good boy?" She asked almost ordering him to, placing kisses along his jawline.
His heart kept hammering heavily in his chest as his breathing grew heavy at her commands.
She had taken an unexpected role in this reunion, and it was taking him some time to get used to this new dynamic not that he minded.
He slowly nodded, his mouth barely able to utter a single word
"Yes... I'll be a good boy" he finally muttered, rolling his eyes back when she started to nibble on his sweet spot, his breath becoming heavier and heavier as his hands kept tickling.
He needed to grab her, to hold into her but he was too afraid to do so— William didn't want her to stop for no reason.
Y/n's body was still clothed while William was bare under her, needy of her touch and love.
"Tell me you're mine, honey" she whispered, making her hand travel lower in a painful slow pace.
"I'm yours" he muttered quickly out, his heart racing violently as his breath grew more ragged
"I'm yours" he repeated it again breathless, as if to convince himself more than her that this was true.
Her hand grabbed his rock-hard cock which was hidden under the skirt of her dress, she pumped it a couple of time, watching his face writhe in a grimace of pleasure.
"What do you want, baby?" Y/n whispered a couple of minutes later, denying him the release.
The question threw him off completely as he was still under the effects of her sudden dominance.
It took him a few moments to even grasp the question she was asking him, but when he did, the words that fell from his mouth were quick and decisive
"I want..." his voice was nearly a whisper
"I want you to teach me a lesson" his eyes were filled with anticipation as he stared at hers.
"My baby wants a lesson? A lesson of what, huh? Does my baby need to be remined of who he belongs to?" She mocked him, tightening the grip she had on his thrombing cock.
William groaned in response, the pain of her grip nearly unbearable, as was the mocking tone she used.
His eyes narrowed in pain and pleasure as she challenged him, as if daring him to resist
"Yes" he whispered softly "Yes, darling...I need to learn my place".
Another harsh slap could be heard in the room, he blinked a couple of times, looking at her now like a lost puppy
"I'm not your darling, baby. What am I?" She asked, her free hand grabbing his face "You're My Mistress" he whispered out, the words coming out like a sudden admission.
His head bowed down slightly, his gaze falling down as he waited a response or another slap.
"Mistress" Y/n repeated softly, nodding in approval "Call me that, baby" she kissed his bruised lips as a reward
"Is my baby ready to be reminded?" She whispered against his lips.
His lips parted in an involuntary whimper as she moved her hand again
"Yes Mistress... I'm ready" he whispered in a low voice, waiting her next move.
Her lips touched his face again in a kiss, her nails scratching along his lips, reminding him of the power she held in this moment.
"That's a good boy" she praised, listening to William's soft whimper.
Y/n moved down his body, leaving kisses down his pale freckled skin till she reached his leaking cock— her thumb rubbed his angry red tip, collecting his pre-cum as he squirmed softly, his hands grabbing into the bed.
Her bottom lip was caged between her teeth, her eyes fixed on him while she continued with her actions, slapping hard the pale skin of his tigh as soon as he tried to do something
"Ah Ah, baby. Behave or I stop, got it?" Y/n murmured, spitting on his cock to be able to stroke him better, earning other whines and whimpers from the grown man.
The young woman managed to deny him his release for six times before receiving an actual reaction from him.
Tears running down his sharp but handsome face, his cheeks flushed and his lips bruised for all his biting and the kisses they shared before.
And each slap on his thigh was a sharp sting of pain and a rush of heat that made him tremble slightly against her as a sharp moan escaped his mouth each time
"M-More, please! More, mistress! I-I need m-more" his voice grew hoarse as the lesson went on, his voice dripping with desire and need as he begged her.
A small smirk remined on Y/n's face as she decided to finally stop torturing him and get her pussy a bit of satisfaction as well.
She moved her dress slightly up, not showing William anything but her thighs for a couple of seconds before sink into him— her cunt wrapping tightly around his cock.
William's back arched at the sudden sensation, his eyes rolled back as his hand finally grabbed her hips, letting Y/n still be in control as she bounced on his lenght
"Is my baby close?" She moaned out, grabbing his throat while increasing her pace, ready to receive all the load that William shoot inside of her soon after.
"Yess" she hissed, watching William silent moans, his open mouth and the shaking of his body who was struggling to deal with an orgasm like that
"Fill me, baby boy!" She commanded eagerly before lying next to him breathless as well.
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Taglist:
@gabile18 , @mrsfullbuster500 , @rex-ray , @elizamalfoyy, @eovjjj , @wife-of-magic-monkeys , @jeremiah-va1eska , @gothamchic16, @rabbiteggz , @dieg0brandos-wife , @rottenecstasy , @lazyexcuse , @teh-vampire-bunny , @lobotomy-lover , @slasher-smasher , @sleepycreativewriter , @mrkdvidal1989
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