#luca just wants to get to the next place while alberto enjoys the moment | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

giuliamarcovaldo · 3 years

Text

You’re Okay, Luca

i wanted to read autistic!luca fics but i couldn’t find any. so what did i do? i wrote my own. this is my first time posting fanfic here! so enjoy this little autistic!luca story (with some luberto fluff and angst)

TW: mentions of violent stimming + meltdown

“I was about to have a meltdown and there was nothing I could do to stop it.”

Summary: Luca gets over stimulated at a fancy dinner party, and Alberto witnesses Luca having a meltdown for the first time.

I want to say they’re 16-17 in this??

100% sfw because they are children

word count: 1580

also please don’t kill me if the Italian words are wrong i used google translate sksjsjaksk

(also note: i am autistic)

——————

Alberto knew I was autistic. I told him about a year ago, when we first became a thing.

“This doesn’t change anything, Luca. There’s nothing in this world that could make me stop loving you.” His words rang through my head as I felt the onset of a meltdown.

Giulia had invited Alberto and me to a gathering with some of her extended family in Genoa. They were all very nice, and Alberto even made friends with some of them (which was no surprise). That wasn’t the cause of my meltdown. It was the atmosphere. It was a bright, loud fancy dining hall, nearly at full capacity. I was wearing a suit and tie that Giulia’s cousin had let me borrow. The collar was scratching my skin in the worst possible way but I didn’t want to be rude so I sucked it up. That was my first mistake. Between the bright lights, loud conversations and music, jam-packed room, a plethora of smells from foods that I had never heard of, and the suit collar, I could feel it coming.

It was sensory overload at first. I tried stimming subtly. I wasn’t out as autistic to everyone yet and the thought of them judging me for stimming made my anxiety worse. But I had to do something. Squeezing my hands into fists under the table. Chewing the inside of my cheek. Running my fingers through my hair repeatedly. It wasn’t enough, but somehow too much at the same time.

I was getting more and more fidgety. It was becoming harder to mask. Would it be rude to just get up and leave without saying anything? Probably. I couldn’t move anyway. I was frozen in my seat. My facial expressions were almost completely gone at this point, along with my ability to speak. Alberto noticed that something was wrong.

“Luca, hey, are you alright?” I couldn’t get the words “no, I feel like I’m about to explode into a violently stimming disaster if I don’t get out of here right now but I can’t move and I feel helpless” out of my mouth so I just nodded and gave him a small, unconvincing smile. I didn’t want to burden Alberto while he was having such a good time. I knew it was ridiculous to think that Alberto would mind helping me calm down, but my brain wouldn’t quit telling me otherwise.

Silenzio, Bruno. Silenzio, Bruno. Silenzio, Bruno. It wasn’t working.

Alberto didn’t look convinced. He knew me too well. Ever since I told him I was autistic he tried his best to make sure I was as comfortable as possible in every situation. I loved him for that but I hated myself for it. It’s like I always need to be babysat and I hate it. I know that he loves me so why do I feel so guilty?

My intrusive thoughts running through my mind was the final straw. It was all too much. Alberto’s face looked more concerned as each moment passed. He was about to witness me having a meltdown for the first time since we met. I didn’t know if I was ready for that type of vulnerability but I didn’t really have a choice. I was about to have a meltdown and there was nothing I could do to stop it.

“Luca, we’re going to go some place quiet, okay?”

I shook my head no. I couldn’t move. I couldn’t speak. It had gone from sensory overload, to shutdown, to a full-blown meltdown. I couldn’t hold back my stims anymore. I started hitting my head with my fists and pulling at my hair. Tears rolled down my face uncontrollably, exposing my green-blue scales.

Perfecto.

I didn’t know which was worse: violently and uncontrollably stimming in front of everyone, or unintentionally outing myself as a sea monster. They might have been tied. Most of the guests were too into their conversations to notice the autistic sea monster having a meltdown next to them but the few who did notice started to pass glances and whisper amongst themselves.

“Luca, Luca, you’re okay. I know you don’t like anyone touching you when you’re in sensory overload but I’m going to help you get out of here, okay?”

Alberto helped me get up from the table and escorted me out of the dining room, using his suit jacket to cover my face so no one would see my scales, but being careful to not let it touch my face. We made our way to a long hallway off of the lobby. Alberto sat me down on the ground and flipped the hallway light switch off. Light from the lobby trailed into the hallway but didn’t reach us at the end.

I was out of the environment but still at the height of my meltdown. Tears were still coming from my eyes. I continued to tug at my hair while I rocked back and forth. I couldn’t vocalize anything except for non verbal sounds. I felt so helpless, so defeated, so ashamed.

Alberto tried to redirect my violent stims, to no avail. I’m sure he felt helpless too. I wanted to stop but I couldn’t. And I felt bad that Alberto couldn’t help that.

Alberto sat a few feet away from me, probably resisting the urge to pull me into a hug.

“I’ll just sit with you, okay? You’re okay. You’re okay. You’re okay.” Alberto reassured me that he wasn’t leaving. My perception of time isn’t that great but it felt like at least 45 minutes before I started to come down. Still there, like he said he would be, Alberto let out a deep shaky breath. I hadn’t looked at him the entire time because I was too embarrassed that he had to see all of that. When I finally did glance up at him, I notice two trails of purple scales down his cheeks. Knowing he had cried hurt me even more.

“Are you feeling better?” I was still nonverbal and rocking back and forth but my violent stims had passed. I opened my left hand flat and tapped it with my right index finger.

“Oh! Right,” Alberto pulled a pen and pad from my jacket, which he had helped me remove from my body earlier in my meltdown. He slid them across the floor and anxiously waited for me to write my response.

“I’m sorry you had to see me like that.”

Alberto’s face changed as he read what I had written. His green eyes looked sadder when they met my gaze. I could feel my tears starting to well up again.

“No, no, Luca, mio amore, please don’t feel bad. I should have checked on you earlier than I did. I got a little lost with everything going on in there. I’m sorry that I didn’t check up on you sooner...” Alberto was very protective of me. I know that the thought of me suffering while he didn’t know was absolutely crushing him. But it wasn’t his fault. It wasn’t mine. It wasn’t anybody’s. I was starting to think rationally again. I shouldn’t feel sorry for having meltdowns, for being autistic, for being myself. But I should have spoken up when I started to feel uncomfortable. That’s something I need to work on, and I know I can do it as long as Alberto is with me. And he always will be.

“Is it alright if I touch you?” I know Alberto was dying to physically comfort me. It was his love language. I nodded my head yes and gave him a warm smile. He crawled over to me and I opened my arms to embrace him. I listened to his steadying heartbeat while he whispered affirmations to me and gently rubbed my back. Warm tears started to fall down my face.

God, I love this boy so much.

“Bontà, there you two are! I’ve been looking everywhere! What happ-“ Giulia’s voice got closer as she made her way down the hallway.

“Oh no, Luca... mi dispiace... I didn’t know you were- when did- where-“ She crouches down next to the two of us. Giulia, also being autistic, could tell I was in post-meltdown. She slaps her palm to her forehead and curses herself.

“Of course! I should have been more aware about- why didn’t I- are you okay?”

“Giulia,” Alberto places his hand on her shoulder. “he’s alright. Nothing that happened is your fault. Or... mine for that matter. We’re alright.”

“Can I get you guys something? A glass of water?”

I nod my head yes.

“Water sounds good, grazie, little sis.” Alberto and Giulia exchange smiles, then she leaves down the hallway, her red curls bouncing behind her.

“Luca,” Alberto cups my cheek in his hand, wiping away my tears with his thumb.

“I love you, okay? I love you so, so much. Nothing is going to change that. Please, don’t ever feel like an inconvenience. It hurts to see you like that, and I know it hurts to experience it. Please, tell me next time, Okay?”

I didn’t even need to tell him that I felt like an inconvenience. He just knew. Like I said, he knows me too well. I nod my head, and pull him back into an embrace. Alberto combs his fingers through my hair, getting rid of the tangles that I made in it earlier.

I feel lighter. I feel safe to be myself. I feel more loved than ever.

——————

that’s it! my first fic! a lot of this is me projecting onto luca (sksakdjsjjsk) but i had a lot of fun writing it! feel free to leave comments and/or constructive criticism. likes and reblogs appreciated!! :)

#luca #pixar luca #luca paguro #alberto scorfano #giulia marcovaldo #autistic!luca #luberto #mine #my writing

158 notes · View notes

anchoviesinthenightsky · 3 years

Note

Here’s something that came to mind from seeing tangled the series that lives in my head rent free I don’t know what to do with:

Following a year after the movie, Luca comes home for early spring holidays. Alberto’s mood is oddly kinda down in a way him and Massimo hadn’t seen before. Luca and Massimo worry what could be troubling him, as Massimo reveals that he’s been down for a few weeks now since spring really kinda started. Massimo decides to take the boys fishing, thinking it would cheer him up to keep him busy, as Alberto had said he doesn’t know why he’s sad, it just happens every spring and it’ll pass, like seasonal depression. Though while out near the good fishing spot Alberto and Luca had shown early, they couldn’t get Alberto to focus much as he just focused on the island he use to reside from, like a trance.

Is it abandonment issues? Yes. Feel free with whatever ending or style, I know it’s not really Luca x Alberto but I am not good with romance plots I’m so sorry 😞 hope you enjoy it anyway

AN: What a GREAT prompt. I had so much fun writing this. I'm not sure if you meant this, but I took this to imply that Alberto's dad left in the spring. And I was thinking about why that memory would be triggered for a full season, and I landed on the idea that something in the environment (like a particular scent) that Alberto associated with his dad leaving, could make an entire season difficult. So I was playing around with that idea!

______: *✧･ﾟ:*___ >><(((・> ______ >><(((・> ____ _: *✧･ﾟ:*__

Spring was in the air, sweet and verdant, and flower petals floated through the air as Luca stepped off the train and into the Portorosso train station. School was on break for a week for the Easter holidays, and Luca had opted to spend the time back home, while Giulia stayed with her mom.

Luca heaved his travel bag off the train steps and looked around the platform. He saw Alberto and Massimo standing in the corner of the station. Alberto was looking off into the distance, not focused on what or who was in front of him. Massimo was lightly patting him on the shoulder and pointing to Luca.

“Beto!” Luca shouted, trying to get his attention.

Alberto shook his head, like he was clearing his brain of fog, and then locked eyes with Luca. “Luca!”

Alberto’s arms were strong and warm as Luca crashed into them. Luca wrapped his own arms around Alberto and squeezed. “I’ve missed you.”

“I missed you too.” Alberto whispered, hugging Luca tight.

And Luca noticed that something felt off about his friend. Maybe it was in the way he seemed to cling onto Luca for the hug, but barely touched him once they let go.

Maybe it was that there was a hollowness in his voice and a distance in his eyes. Like he was here physically, but not mentally, when he told Luca that he could stay in Massimo’s house, if he wanted. And that he’d already asked Luca’s parents if that was okay, and they said it was.

Luca picked up his bag and followed Alberto and Massimo out of the station. He couldn’t shake the feeling that something was off about his friend.

[continued below the cut]

___

“Aren’t the flowers beautiful?” Luca asked. He and Alberto were walking under a trellis lined with wisteria and roses. The flowers wept through the openings, trailing down to brush the tops of their heads as they passed. Luca picked one of the wisteria buds and tucked it behind Alberto’s ear. “They’re almost the same color as your scales.”

Alberto pressed his lips together and took the flower from behind his ear. He looked at it for a moment before turning to Luca and putting it behind his hear. “Maybe you should wear it then, so we’ll match.”

“Oh, well,” Luca touched the flower. The delicate petals mixing with his curls. “We could both wear flowers.”

Luca reached up to grab another one, and Alberto stopped him from reaching the wisteria blossoms.

“Please don’t,” Alberto’s voice caught in his throat. He cleared it with a cough. “I don’t really like how they smell.”

“Oh.” Luca said, retracting his hand. “I didn’t know.”

“’’Sokay,” Alberto shrugged. “I’d never told you.”

___

The rocks beneath Luca’s feet clicked together as he followed Massimo away from the boat. He watched Alberto check the fishing nets. From a distance, he looked sure of his actions, like they’d become second nature to him.

“Luca,” Massimo said, putting a hand on Luca’s shoulder. “Have you noticed that Alberto hasn’t been himself?”

“Yeah,” Luca responded slowly. “It’s like he’s not totally here.”

“Yes, exactly.” Massimo said. “He’s been like that for weeks.”

“For weeks?”

Massimo nodded. “Do you know anything that might cause him to be like that?”

“Not that I know of. Maybe it’s seasonal? He was never like this in the summer.”

“Could be.” Massimo said.

‘Do you think it’s something else?”

“I do not know what to think, ragazzo.” Massimo took his hand off Luca’s shoulder. “I just want him to feel better.”

____

Water sloshed around the sides of the Giulietta, as the boat came to a stop at a particularly good fishing spot. Massimo lowered the net into the water and waited for Alberto to drop anchor. When he didn’t Massimo said, “Luca would you mind dropping the anchor.”

“Of course.” Luca stood up, his leg brushing against Alberto’s, and dropped the anchor gently over the side. He imagined it sinking down and the plume of sand that’d follow as it hit the ground.

He sat back down next to Alberto, who was looking toward the island they’d meet. The island looked different in the spring. It was more colorful than Luca remembered. Flowers dotted the island, and on the side of the island opposite the tower, there was a wisteria tree. It was close enough to the water, then some of the branches floated on the surface, rolling with the gentle waves that came to shore.

Alberto’s eyes were unfocused, and Luca nudged him with his shoulder. “What are you looking at?”

Alberto blinked hard, squeezing his eyes shut, before looking down at the water. “Nothing.”

“It didn’t seem like nothing,” Luca said quietly. He placed a hand on Alberto’s knee. “You know you can share things with me, right?”

“I know,” Alberto’s eyes flicked up to Massimo and then back down to the water. “Everything is fine.”

Massimo shifted in his seat, like he was about to speak, but Luca held up a hand to stop him. “What do you say about going on a swim, Alberto?”

“We’re in the middle of fishing.”

“It’s a good idea,” Massimo said. “I can handle the fish.”

“Come on Beto,” Luca tugged on his hand. “The water’s nice.”

“Luca, it’s May. The water’s cold.”

“For humans maybe,” he teased. “Come on.”

Luca slipped into the water, feeling scales shimmer over his body. He splashed his face to finish the change. “It’s really nice Alberto.”

“I don’t know.” Alberto leaned over the edge of the boat to look at Luca.

Luca flicked some water at his face, purple dots appearing where he hit.

“Hey!” Alberto rubbed the scaled away. “What was that for?”

“I just thought it’d be funny.” Luca said, unsure.

“Well, it wasn’t funny, and I don’t want to swim.”

Luca watched as Massimo looked between Alberto and the island. “Alberto,” he said. “You can go swim. I won’t go anywhere. I promise. I’ll be right here when you’re ready to go back home.”

Alberto’s shoulders dropped. His lips pinched together, and he nodded slowly. “You promise?”

“Of course.” Massimo replied.

“Thank you, papa.” Alberto said. He slipped out of the boat and dipped his head under the water, before popping back up to face Luca. “Where to?”

Luca grabbed his hand and pulled him down.

___

They didn’t go so far down that they lost sight of Massimo’s boat, but they were deep enough that the sky distorted under the water and the currents would carry their bodies if they left them.

Luca flipped on his back and put his hands behind his head, letting the water roll over him. Alberto stayed curled up, his tail curling around a leg.

“So, what’s really going on?” Luca asked.

“Nothing, I told you.” Alberto glanced behind him at the island. Luca could see branches of wisteria floating on the water.

“Beto,” Luca flipped over and put a hand on Alberto’s arm, “you’re a terrible liar.”

“I am not.”

“You are, and that’s okay.” Luca smiled a little. “But you’ve been acting out of it, and it seems like something is wrong. You can talk to me. I’m here for you.”

Alberto pressed his lips together and looked off to the side of Luca’s face, as if he couldn’t look him in the eye. “You know my dad?”

“Massimo?”

“No, the other one.”

“Oh.” Luca squeezed Alberto’s shoulder, hoping the touch was reassuring. “What about him.”

“He left in the spring.”

Luca nodded, afraid saying anything would stop Alberto in his tracks.

“It was,” Alberto turned and pointed to the floating petals on the water. “there.”

“Under the wisteria?” Luca asked. Heart dropping as he recalled trying to give Alberto a flower from that same plant.

“Yeah.” Alberto dropped his head. “We were sitting there, under the flowers. It was a nice day, where the weather was finally starting to get warm again. He told me that he was leaving, and that I could watch after myself.”

Alberto’s eyes watered. “And then he left. And I sat under those flowers until the sun went down. I slept under that tree the first night too, and I thought— I thought if I didn’t leave then maybe he’d come back.”

“I’m so sorry Alberto.”

“Me too.” Luca pulled Alberto in for a hug, “You should tell Massimo. He’s been worried about you.”

Alberto shook his head, hiding it in Luca’s neck. He mumbled, “What if I tell him and he thinks my dad was right and leaves me too.”

“No.”

“What?” Alberto lifted his head a little.

“Massimo isn’t like that. You know that.” Luca put a hand on Alberto’s cheek. “You’ve got a Bruno in your head.”

Alberto gave a wet laugh. “Yeah, maybe I do.”

“I know you do.”

#alberto scorfano #luca panguro #massimo marcovaldo #ask box prompts #my writing #i hope i delivered some of the angst you were hoping for!#i think this is could make a good one-shot #so i'll probably clean it up/add to it over the next couple weeks when I have some free time #keep an eye out for that? i'll probably reblog this post with a link whenever i end up uploading it!

22 notes · View notes

floralcreer · 3 years

Text

A Genoa Holiday - Part 2

Alberto has dinner at Isabella’s house

“Oh Alberto look how tall you are now,” Isabella, Giulia’s mother said, as he and Luca walked into the home. He smiled, leaning down to kiss her cheeks as they said their hellos. “Sorry I wasn’t in when you arrived but your bag is up in Luca’s room.” She was very much like Giulia in looks, but that is where the resemblance stopped; Isabella was much calmer and patient. Alberto wondered if her spirit came from a weird mix of Massimo’s bravery and Isabella’s creativity.

“It’s fine, really. I only had a few minutes before I had to pick up Luca.” Alberto replied, smiling as Luca came into the kitchen, a big pink box on hand. “I brought Cannoli for dessert.”

“You are a credit to Massimo, Alberto. Luca, can you go fetch the girls, we’ll have dinner in the garden,” Luca nodded, rushing up the stairs, “and you can grab me that bowl up there, Mr Long Legs.” Alberto did as he was asked, grabbing the salad bowl from atop the fridge, placing it on the table and helping prep dinner. “How is Massimo?”

“Papa’s ok, still a bit shaken from the accident so I think he’s enjoying a weeks peace.” Isabella’s head went up, looking confused. “Did Giulia not say?”

“No, what accident?”

“We went out in a mild storm to help a fellow fisherman who’s engine cut out a week ago and he went over. He’s lucky to have a son who is a sea monster but it did shake him up. He… there was water in his lungs but we got him around pretty quick.” Isabella put a hand to her mouth. “He’s ok, I promise.”

“I am… he’s strong, life hasn’t been the kindest but he’s strong. I’ll call him after we’ve eaten. Poor you having to experience that. You’re very brave.” Alberto smiled, nodding and putting the salad in the bowl. “I’m going to collect those 3, heaven knows what they are up to. Sorry to ask so much of you but do you mind putting the table cloth and things out on the table?”

“Of course.” Alberto smiled, doing as he was asked. Isabella climbed the stairs, finding the 3 stood around Alberto’s case.

“I still don’t think we should look.” Bria whispered, both arms wrapped around one of Giulia’s, “if he brought you gifts he’ll give them too you.”

“Exactly.” Isabella said, making them all jump. “Also it’s very rude to look in a persons case without them. Dinner is ready.” They all mumbled apologies, rushing down stairs.

Dinner was filled with laughter, and Alberto and Bria got on so well both of their partners, for a moment, got a bit jealous. Bria hadn’t laughed so much in a while, both being able to converse, mostly about Giulia, with ease. Giulia and Luca were impressed, Bria was very shy and quiet with most people. Alberto dazzled most people he met since he started working on the boats, growing stronger and more handsome as the days passed. He told Luca in every phone call and letter how beautiful he was, but Luca knew Alberto was the more conventional attractive of the two. He didn’t mind.

“Yes, Giulia,” Isabella said, interrupting one of Alberto’s stories about him and Massimo’s trips, “you never said your father had an accident. You need to tell me these things.” The table fell into an uncomfortable silence. Alberto threw Giulia a small ‘sorry’ smile.

“I didn’t think you’d care,” she said, looking down into her wine glass. Bria threw her a sad glance, knowing what was coming next. “You’re not married. And you’re dating that guy.” They had split when Giulia was 9, but it was only now Isabella felt confident to date.

“Giulietta… He is still your father. I’m going to call him.” Isabella got up, leaving the table in the silence. Luca took her hand and squeezed it, before leaning back and quietly opening the window so they could listen. They almost held their breath. “Massimo… hi, it’s Bella, Alberto told me about what happened, are you ok?…. Yeah Giulia didn’t mention it, and she’s in trouble for not telling me… but I’m glad you’re ok. Still making me worry after all this time.”

“I’m getting the cannolis.” Giulia said, standing up. Alberto nudged Luca, a sign for him to leave the siblings for a moment.

“No I’ll get them, you stay.” Luca said, getting up.

“I’ll get more water.” Bria added, following Luca into the house. Alberto moved into Bria’s chair, putting an arm around his sister as they listened to Isabella and Massimo talk. Giulia leant in, her head on his shoulder, smiling up at him a little.

“I’m glad your here.” Giulia muttered, and Alberto squeezed her closer. “Thank you…”

“It’s what brothers are for.”

“Do you think Massimo and Isabella will get together again? The conversation was very friendly.” Luca asked, curling closer to Alberto. They were on Luca’s bed, listening to the city slow down beneath the open window. Luca started drawing circles on the older man’s bare chest, both only in shorts due to the heat. “But I don’t want Giulia to get her hopes up.”

“I know… best not say anything. I don’t like seeing her this upset. She’s really upset about her parents dating other people. I think she always hoped they would get back together one day.” Alberto replied, fiddling with Luca’s shell necklace Alberto had made for him. Luca sat up, leaning over Alberto.

“Massimo is dating someone? Is it Signora Emma? Signora Greta?” Alberto laughed, which made Luca smile.

“My lips are sealed.”

“They better not be because,” Luca leaned down and pressed a few kisses to his lips, “I have more stuff I want to say.” Alberto muttered ‘later’ pulling Luca down for more kisses. After a few moments (or minutes, Luca wasn’t sure), Luca pulled away, looking a bit embarrassed. “I… I still don’t want to do… it yet.”

“Hey, piccolo, I know,” Alberto sat up, taking Luca’s hand in his, “I’m happy to wait.”

“I don’t want anyone to hear us it’s… embarrassing…” Luca was bright red, not looking at Alberto, who just smiled, leaning down and into his bag and pulling out a letter, holding it out to Luca. “What’s this?” The younger took the letter, opening it and reading the words ‘we look forward to welcoming you too the Hotel Milano’ looking at Alberto. “Milan?”

“It’s for your birthday, I’ve got it all planned out and hey,” he took both of Luca’s hands, entwining their fingers, “I will wait as long as you need me too. I am not expecting you to ever feel like you want to do that, but it will just be us, and if you want to, then sure. I only want to if you do.” Luca was tearing up, leaping and hugging Alberto tightly.

“I love you so much. Thank you, beto.”

“I love you too bubble.” Luca grinned, rubbing his nose against Alberto’s. “I’m still not telling you who my dad is dating.”

Just a little side note; I won’t be writing Alberto and Luca’s first time. They are aged up here but it still makes me uncomfortable. If you guys want to, feel free to use this set up.

#luca x alberto #luberto #pixar luca #luca 2021 #giulia marcovaldo #alberto scorfano #luca paguro #original character

47 notes · View notes