I feel it rage
beneath my skin
And echo in my bones
The urge to press my lips
To feel you wholly inside
Makes my blood hum
My thoughts run
Like wild fire
Craving calloused hands
To touch, pull, scrape
As friction builds
And chaotic pieces
Until pleasure overflows
The taste of you
Haunts me for days
While my heart
Cracks a little more
When did I begin
To crave you
With recklessness simmering
Under a bottled cage
I don’t let you see
Like I want to with you
Make me come undone
As I wonder if
You ever want me like this too.
Soothing Bath. Soft Whispers.
I have women all around me,
but I cannot capitalize on anything
that gets my foot in the door
for some form of human contact
I want to be held, I want to hold
I want to wrap my body around someone,
and for them to do the same to me.
I miss making out and having sex in the shower
I miss feeling weightless in someone’s presence
I miss the subtle sparks of romance coupled with rough sex
I miss spontaneously combusting from just being looked at
I once had something
that made me feel alive,
alert, and ready to wake up
every single fucking morning
I can only hope that things work out, and work out soon
I’m dying here emotionally
I am losing what passion I may still have left
I listen to love songs
in hopes of finding happiness
from hearing about others and their success
in finding another to satisfy their wants,
I feel like it’s a shallow thing to do;
to not look just for love, but for sex too
Though how long would it take to feel stable if I were to become infatuated over someone else?
How long would that last before another relationship ends again and find myself saying these exact words?
How can I feel alive again?
Rainy Days & Mondays Always…
… Rarely affect me. Unless it is to spawn disturbed characters such as those in Disturbed Affections.
Three short stories and two deranged love affairs.
so help me god
Waking up this time wasn’t as confusing. He could tell he was no longer dreaming only because of the glitches that occasionally jumped into his vision, as well as the quiet sound of a computer startup that always accompanied him when he woke up.
Yet, the warnings in his dreams were still vague.
Sometimes you’re going to have to let go? Don’t let go of hope? Why had Lust or Hearts, whatever his name is kept referring to a mistake? Why had Gaster told him not to regret? Why did Gaster also talk about a mistake?
That warning Core gave him a few days ago at Ccino’s was ominous too.
TW: Mention of study of corpses, non explicit melting of characters
Just as Lust had said, for a while, it was a struggle. Both inside the lab and outside.
He did his best to try and keep some of Gaster’s memory alive, coaxing Papyrus to try more recipes and learn to cook more and trying to teach him Wingdings. Just as before, Papyrus was quick to learn to cook but still struggled with Wingdings.
In the back of his mind, Core’s warning rang: “Sometimes you’re going to have to let go,” Yet, how could he let go of his father? The man who had raised him? Who inspired him to go into the field of science?
When he confronted Lust with these thoughts and questions, Lust confessed that it might be time he let go. Although his lover was quick to clarify that he didn’t need to forget Wingdings or abandon his father’s memory, but he needed to stop trying to bring back what he lost.
TW: Character death
The next day, nearly a full month after the Royal children died, tragedy struck again. This time there wasn’t any warning, Sci just had to watch as Gaster tripped and fell into the CORE.
There was a bright flash, and for a moment, he was in a dark void. He didn’t even have time to look around before he woke up in his bed.
His room looked different though, his mattress no longer on the floor but on a bed frame towards the center of the room instead of stuffed in the corner. His floor lamp still sat by his bed, but his desk was centered on another wall, and his bookshelf looked like the one Gaster has. He didn’t even have his treadmill in his room either. He had a second door too, slightly ajar, showing a private bathroom, something he definitely didn’t have before.