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lethesomething · 1 year

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Yakuza and coping mechanisms

Yakuza has been my on and off hyperfocus for years now but also in particular the past month, so let's talk about it. And particularly, how many friggin coping mechanisms are in this game.

Disclaimer: I do literary analysis, not psycho analysis, don't come for me.

For all its silliness about fighting roomba's and disco minigames, the world that the Yakuza games is set in, is fucking brutal. They are, at their very core, crime drama's. People get murdered a lot, lives are ruined in various ways, a good third of protags spend large amounts of time in jail, usually for a crime they didn't commit. Most politicians and police are corrupt, racism is blatant and if you don't have a place in the very strict hierarchy of society, it's hard to get back on your feet (hence all the crime). I tend to read a lot of indictments of Japanese society in these games, partly because they are so clearly based on old school yakuza crime drama's.

This means that the characters go through some shit. And what's fascinating, is how they deal with this.

Spoiler warning for, uhh, almost all yakuza games except Song Of Life (since i never played that)

Pretending it's not real

Kasuga Ichiban

The direct reason I'm even making this blog post because he's the most blatant about it. Kasuga is Peak Himbo in that he's not the sharpest tool in the shed, but he manages to take being beaten down Repeatedly and overcomes that with a sense of genuine good nature and optimism that is… honestly kind of hard to believe. The way he deals with any of this, is that he's a nerd who pretends to be in a video game. It's the whole premise of Yakuza Like a Dragon.

And to be fair, Kasuga suffers from an amount of mistreatment that makes me Very Angry in his stead. He has every right to be upset! He is literally homeless in the beginning of the game. If he requires the escapism of going around pretending to be in a jrpg to survive, more power to him. Especially since it works. Dude goes around helping people and making friends. Which is a good thing, because there's no way he'd make it out of Yokohama alive if he didn't have some back-up.

Side note: something similar happens to at the very least Majima, i think, in the admittedly non-canonical events of Yakuza Dead Souls. (yes i played it solely for Majima, no i do not recommend it, the game is garbage and you get more Majima in Zero anyway). In Dead Souls, Kamurocho is overrun by zombies. As a lover of all things Horror, Majima decides he may as well have a good time mowing them down like he's in an FPS while he trudges through the wreckage of society.

Self sacrifice

Mostly Kazuma Kiryu and Saejima Taiga

If you hate yourself, at least try to be of use to someone. Let's be honest, a lot of the plot of Yakuza games is driven by self sacrifice or at least following some code of honor to its ludicrous ends.

Kiryu is the main example here. The game kinda glosses over this a lot, but he is, at least in Zero, a criminal. He goes around extorting money from businesses. He consistently solves problems through violence. It's kinda the point of the games. But he's also borderline a saint and 80% of the shit he gets into is because of his need to throw himself to the wolves for any person he cares about. He voluntarily does hard time for Nishikiyama, for one. He picks up a stray kid that he will now protect with his life. And it just goes on from there. See, Kiryu may be the famous Dragon of Dojima and the Fifth Chairman of the Tojo Clan and all that, but he would very much prefer not to be? Dude wants to live a quiet life and raise some kids, it's just that he's the protag of a game series about how hard it is to say goodbye to the yakuza life. So the plot keeps finding ways to bring him back, usually as a reluctant warrior to save the Tojo clan or Haruka or whatever. If he was a little less honorable, he could still be chilling as a taxi driver with an unreasonably hot girlfriend, I'm just saying.

Saejima is very similar, but somehow even worse? Much as I love the guy, he's an idiot. He suffers from the same loyalty and selflessness as Kiryu, but he doesn't even get a cute daughter out of it. He spends Twenty Five years in prison for a crime he (we later find out) didn't commit. He escapes months before his parole to solve the convoluted plot of Y4. Then Goes Back to Jail to atone for (again) a crime he only thought he'd committed, only to escape (again) when he thinks Majima, his sworn brother, got murdered in Y5. As far as i can tell he goes back to jail one last time to finish his actual sentence, and to like, protect the name of the Tojo clan or some shit. My dude. My friend. Come on.

As a side note, acts of selflessness are kind of a big deal in the Yakuza games and one of the main ways to tell if someone is a good criminal or a villain. Kasuga and his crew are pretty big on the whole 'acts of selfless kindness' thing. It also seems to be one of the traits of Daigo Dojima, whose whole being screams 'I don't want to be here but who else is gonna fucking do it'. But in the case of Kiryu and Saejima it's very much verging on reckless self-endangerment.

Fabricated identities

Majima Goro, baby!

The Yakuza games really love this one, but I'll start with the big guy, everyone's favourite character: Majima. This dude has seen some shit. We see him throughout several flashbacks and the span of the games, but most tellingly we see him in Zero, at his rock bottom hero stage. And he's intriguingly unlike the other times he shows up. This is a Majima that's recovering from torture and backstabbing, and forced to do some dude's bidding for scraps. He's a chained dog (pun very much intended) and he's about to lose it.

What's fun about Majima is that he has So Many of the traits in this list. He has a lot of the reckless endangerment and self sacrifice that his buddies Kiryu and Saejima have. He gave himself up a few times for Haruka, he keeps trundling back to save Tojo and Dojima, but there's also a whole other layer of … Flamboyance to him.

And while Majima probably started out as comic relief, the games make clear that it's not all he is, and we get several glimpses of 'old Majima' throughout the series. He'll be in the middle of a self inflicted fight and drop some wisdom, for instance. He acts erratically, he is blunt, violent, exuberant in his dressing up. When given a task his first thought seems to be 'how can i make this Extra', but that doesn't mean the guy is unstable. You don't become a successful businessman with a building company, or a patriarch of your own family, without being smart and strategic. A lot of classic Majima behaviour, i feel, is a case of a mask he constructed to hide the severe depression, that became more of a second nature to him. Majima is one of the clearest examples of 'do what you need to do'. He's a survivor, through and through. Somewhere in there is a decent human being, but Majima will kill people to survive in a harsh world. It just seems like he constructed an extra layer to shield himself from all that.

Joon-gi Han (Like a Dragon): This is more a case of stolen (inherited??) identity, but again, if you don't want to be you, just be someone else. In this case someone he admires. Again: super tragic backstory, questionable life choices. As an aside, Joon-gi is fun because he is both a deadly assassin with someone else's name and face, but also a Knight stereotype who would do everything for his queen and I think that's neat.

Zhao Tianyou (Like a Dragon): Somewhat more subtle, but Zhao is also a dude that was at one point confronted with a Situation, namely 'oh shit my dad died and now I'm in charge of a violent gang'. And to deal with that he decided to construct a persona that gives exactly zero fucks. He is very joking and very avoidant but we do learn that a fair amount of his laid back attitude is just veneer. Dude in fact gives several fucks. You don't decide to give up the throne and become a homeless sidekick to Himbo Supreme because you don't care. You do it to stop him from getting ultra-murdered by the parade of heavily armored gangsters he keeps storming into.

Akiyama Shun (Yakuza 4-5): I debated putting him here, because part of me believes Akiyama is just kind of a dick. A dick I love as a character, but still, ya know. At least some of the dickish persona is a front, though. Akiyama is another one that just saw his life's work destroyed at some point, and decided that emotional detachment was the way to go. Akiyama is different because he was never actually a proper criminal. He was homeless for a bit, and then came into some money (through Extremely Convoluted Plot Means) and now he's a moneylender. And like Zhao, he mostly pretends to be completely devoid of feelings, while having a fair amount of feelings. Enough to get into like… fist fights. With actual gangsters. Who have guns.

Vice

Sex, drugs and everything in between

The preferred way for noir drama's to show someone is Going Through It, is by giving them a classic addiction and Yakuza isn't any different. It's why several characters are shown mournfully smoking, in particular Kiryu and Majima. Yes I know it's because it looks cool and harks back to old crime movie atmosphere. That doesn't make it a healthy coping mechanism.

Another obvious one, considering the setting of the games in several red lights districts, is erotica. Both Adachi, the ex-cop from Like a Dragon and Shinada, the ex-baseball player from Y5 and also my least fave protag ever, are both in various stages of obsession about porn, sex work and the likes.

Tanimura, the cop from Y4 has a pretty severe gambling problem in the actual canon, though gambling games and casino's are a general mainstay of the Yakuza series. It's just that when Kiryu interrupts his busy day of solving the convoluted intrigue du jour to gamble in an illegal underground casino, it's not a character flaw.

Also: almost everyone drinks ludicrous amounts of heavy alcohol in these games. Both in canon and as part of the gameplay. 100% ing the games usually involves drinking tons of whiskey, but the whole Ichiban crew, sans I think Eri, is shown drowning their troubles at various times.

Violence: I mean, that's kind of the game, but an unhealthy amount of characters consider fist fights to be a good way to resolve conflict, bond with people and generally reinvigorate themselves. Particularly Majima is shown to get a real kick out of doing damage and being beaten up. There's just a lot of reckless behaviour, which is what makes the games good.

Karaoke: fake it till you make it, man.

Extra note:

You'll notice there's no women on this list, and that's because honestly the game is kinda sexist. So while there's already Very Few women in the game, the ones that are present don't exactly have super complex characters.

Mukoda Saeko, the hostess from Like a Dragon, drinks like a fish but that's about her main flaw.

Other notable female characters are Kiryu's kid Haruka, Kiryu's love interest Sawamura Yumi (Kiwami) and Kamataki Eri, the business lady from Like a Dragon. They're all stereotypical Good Girls who have no flaws apart from indecisiveness and an unhealthy tendency for selflessness.

Saejima Yasuko is ever so slightly more complex: her main trait is self sacrifice. The story promptly fridges her for it.

#yakuza #yakuza like a dragon #yakuza spoilers #kiryu kazuma #majima goro #every other main character #literary analysis #game analysis #omg lethey does a write

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philliamwrites · 2 years

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SWYAATL 12: Raised by Wolves and Voices

Pairing: Eren Jaeger x fem! Reader

Summary: “Wouldn’t that be something.” Jean sniffs, his breath coming out in white plums. “Erasing events from the past, making stuff never have happened. You’d have to be, like, God or something to do that.” “I don’t know. I get you’d want the unpleasant stuff gone, but it’s what makes you the person you are today, right? Even all the bad stuff, I don’t think I’d want that just taken away from me.” Especially without you knowing.

Notes: [01] || 11 | 13

Words: 8.1k

A/N: guys, thank you so so much for all the interest in the story and the love and the messages you send me. there are no words how much i love you guys, you all deserve an eren to kiss you ❤️❤️

Chapter 12: Raised by Wolves and Voices

“Psst, dude.” Connie’s pointy elbow does a pretty good job drilling a hole into your side. “Take a look.”

“I’m kinda busy here myself,” you say, knocking your elbow against his arm, the tips of your fingers stained ink blue. It quickly turns into a fight of who can keep their arm on the table that nobody seems to win. Turns out, Connie is a formidable opponent.

“Just a quick look,” he whispers. “I don’t get what’s wrong with my notes.” He slides a piece of paper over to you, and you need some time to decipher the words.

Supplie Requasition Bread: A bunch Potatos: Around 5 boxes? Milk: Not spoiled Blades: Enough to attack Titans Gas: A good amount

“Yeah,” you say. “I don’t get it either.”

At that moment, Shadis passes your table and takes a look at Connie’s requisition paper. “Now, would you all look at Cadet Springer,” he calls, turning to the room. He plucks the paper from the table by one corner with his thumb and index finger as if it was something particularly filthy he spotted under his kitchen sink. “That is what I call unique!”

Connie beams. “Thanks, sir!”

“Uniquely shit!!”

“Oh.”

“Do it again!”

Shadis marches on, sharp eyes searching for his next prey like a hawk. Connie sags against the backrest of his chair, groaning. “Why do I gotta do this stupid stuff? Put me out in the field, that’s where I belong.”

“Even out in the field, you should have a good feeling for the supplies you have on you.” You finish up your concluding statement on Bordieun Field Theory as an Instrument for Military Operations. You’d hoped to have Armin give it a read, but he’s already left for lunch. When you submit the paper to Shadis, he simply acknowledges it with a curt nod and shoos you away like an annoying fly.

“Oh, come on, don’t leave me here,” Connie whines when you pack up your stuff to head over to the canteen where the rest of your corps is already enjoying their break. “I’ll never finish at this rate.”

“You can do it.” You pat his shaved head. “Try to think about it in actual numbers and be specific as you put them down. It’s fine if you do it in your own words.”

“Okay, okay, I’ll try.”

You leave him slumped over his work and set out snuggled into your warm military coat, upturning your collar to help against the biting cold. The canteen is on the opposite side of the lesson building, but the frosty cobblestone plaza makes the jog take much longer. One false step will guarantee you bruises nastier than any handed to you during hand-to-hand combat practice.

It’s a busy day on the Main Compound. Many cadets and full-fledged soldiers linger, and you pass a group of third years near the main entrance, their hands all stuffed deep inside the warmth of their coat pockets. They jostle and bump against one another, laughing, stamping their feet against the cold snap, the first gasp of winter having arrived weeks earlier than anticipated. You recognise Sylvia, who salutes in your direction. You tap two fingers against your temple as a reply. It is her last winter as a cadet before she graduates in spring next year. The 104th has only one more year to go, and then you will be full-fledged soldiers as well.

Just one more year until the people you have grown close to all walk the paths to their distinctive futures like the last leaves clinging desperately to their familiar branches, but unable to hold on as the sharp, cold winter wind scatters them to new horizons. Time waits for no one, yet still you wish you could have a little more with the friends you have made.

You duck under the stone archway and join the constant stream of soldiers entering the canteen. It is a wide, high-ceilinged building running all the way to the far back of the compound and housing dozens upon dozens of long, narrow tables and benches. On one side, behind multiple counters spread with different meals, garnishes and a diverse assortment of drinks and juices, kitchen hands and scullions scurry from workplace to workplace, tending to the soldiers standing in line to pile as much food as they can carry on their rectangular tin plates. The vast assortment is exactly why you prefer eating here: hearty cabbage potato stew, freshly baked bread unlike the hardened leftovers you get at your mess hall. The smell of garlicky, grilled leek wafts from one end of the long counter. They might have made a pact with the devil for all the additional seasoning on their hands, seeing as one of the cooks drops a pinch of what looks like dried dill into a huge pot of boiled potatoes in a thick herb cream.

After a quick survey of the room you find your desired table and quickly get into line to fetch your meal. Tray filled to the brim with little plates carrying various dishes, you make your way through the crowd, accidentally bumping into people and dodging flying elbows with swift steps Shadis would be proud of.

They’ve settled at tables at the very far end of the room, the only set where only two benches stand by the tables so whenever cadets seize them, they usually push them together so more people can sit, facing each other. When you are within reach, you give everyone a single, respectful nod, except Eren and Jean. The first gets a small bowl full of pickled radishes, the latter a plate piled to the edges with thickly sliced carrots.

“Comrades,” you say, all haughty, your chin raised when you sit down next to Jean. The look on his face is one of unabashed, utter disgust. Eren’s face is full of contemplation as if he is debating if it’s worth it to reach over the table and slap you.

They both, without a word or another acknowledgement of your benevolence, pass the plates on to Sasha who gives a happy chirp and dives right in. You shake your head, stirring gravy into your mashed potatoes. “Where’s Armin?” you ask.

“The library,” comes from Mikasa. You have learnt she is a person of few words but a whole catalogue of looks. The one she sends Eren now is worth an hour of chiding in itself. “Said he was looking for something for the upcoming Snow Trekking Exam.”

“Aren’t they throwing way too many exams around lately?” says Samuel. He keeps throwing urgent gazes towards the main entrance as if waiting for someone. Everyone seems a little on edge, waiting for the news from the Post Master that letters and packages from friends and relatives have finally arrived. You are eager as well. Maybe this time, Ida and Felix have sent an answer.

“We are getting close to starting our third year,” Reiner says. He is stirring lazily in a big cup of steaming tea, his plate lying forgotten beside him even though he has only finished half of it. “It’s only normal that tasks get harder, that we get more exams. They want to make sure the next batch of soldiers is strong and capable.” His eyes linger on Mikasa for a moment, almost a little thoughtful. It is no secret that she remains the undisputed number one cadet and in whatever military branch she will end up, she will rise in rank quickly.

He then turns his keen eyes on you, and grins. “Have you given it a second thought? It’s the third time you’re in the top ten now. You could hold rank eight with a little more, consistent effort.”

You are spared answering when Armin, his face half-hidden behind thick layers of his wool scarf, emerges from the sea of soldiers and joins you, three thick books slipping from his arms onto the table. You pick one by its corners, pulling it close so you can read the title. Operations in Snow and Extreme Cold.

Eren leans in close to you, oblivious to the fabric of his black sweatshirt hanging dangerously close to his plate. The expression he is wearing is distinctly one of Not in front of my salad. “What’s this?” he asks, frowning.

“It’s a book,” you say, flipping open the first pages to skim through it. “You should pick up one and read it.”

“Or I could just smack you with it.”

“So eloquent.”

The corners of his mouth tug upward, as if he is trying to fight the grin that is trying to break free but he is also aware of how bad his performance is in this battle. For the first time, he looks as if he doesn’t mind losing this particular fight.

Armin takes the book from your reach before Eren can put his words into action and start mauling people with it. Eren leans back, sulking. “I was just looking for some easy reads on snow operations,” Armin says. “It’s the first time we’re really out there and I want to be prepared.”

“Shadis gave us a really long lecture this time,” says Samuel. “I dunno, kinda makes me want to skip it, pretend I got the flu or something.”

“It’ll be dangerous, for sure.” Reiner pushes his remaining meal over to Bertholdt who accepts it without a word and starts munching on a lettuce leaf. It makes him look like a baby goat. “He said we’ll spend every lesson until the exam date going over survival guides, gear check, map reading. Everything to prepare us to survive the worst.”

Jean rolls his eyes. “I don’t get the big deal, it’s like he’s thinking the moment we step out into the cold, we’ll all get lost.”

“Well, the books state that when operations fail it is mostly due to human error,” Armin pipes up, struggling to get out of his sleeve until Mikasa grabs onto one tail and tugs his arm free. “Soldiers underestimating the cold, not taking enough gear with them or unable to start a fire out in the open at fifty degrees below zero.” A sort of excitement settles over him as he recites the books’ contents. “They all state that in operations outside the Walls during winter, more soldiers die from hypothermia than attacks from wild animals or Titans.”

“But we are instructed to stay together, right?” Samuel sits up a little straighter now, more alert. “This isn’t like the previous exams where we have to split up and every group gets their own task?”

“That’s probably next year.” Jean grins. “You know, if you make it through this one.”

He cackles at Samuel’s horrid expression, earning a gentle nudge with his elbow from Marco who is stuffing his cheeks full with potatoes. He looks like a squirrel.

Samuel opens his mouth to answer, but then something from the entrance catches his sight and he half-stands from the bench, staring eagerly. Multiple heads turn around, watching Connie hurry down the aisle towards the table swinging around a handful of letters.

“The mail carriers have finally arrived!” he announces, throwing himself in the free seat and right into Sasha. She half-chokes on a mouthful of radishes.

Immediately, Samuel is on his feet, tray in his head. “Godspeed, comrades,” he dismisses you all, and vanishes towards the kitchen ladies near the kitchen sinks to drop off his empty plates.

Jean and you share a glance, and shoving the plates to the edge of the table, Jean elbows you out of the way. When he stands, he stretches like a cat and spreads his arms wide. “You think Mom sent us some chocolate? It should be that time the vendor from Yalkell visits Trost.”

You finish your meal quickly, wolfing it down like a starved woman. “I hope whatever it is isn’t as bad as your Dad’s try at those vegetable cookies.”

Jean shudders. “Yeah, I don’t think Mom should have left him unsupervised.”

“I don’t even remember the last time I had chocolate,” Marco thinks out loud. “After, you know—,” he begins, throwing a quick, unsure glance at Eren, Mikasa and Armin opposite him, then at you, “—after we lost Wall Maria, chocolate got really, really expensive.”

“I don’t get it,” Eren says. “What’s so special about it?”

You throw him a curious glance over the rim of your cup. “You don’t like it?”

He shrugs. “I’ve never had chocolate before.”

You gasp theatrically, and lean forward to place a hand on his shoulder. You feel him slightly tense under your touch, his muscles turning hard, his skin warm under the fabric. “That is the saddest thing I have ever heard.”

“Do you want me to hit you?”

A small, private smile catches you off-guard and you glance down, hoping he won’t see it.

Rapid foot tapping against the wooden floor, the tell-tale sign of Jean’s impatience, finally drives you out of your seat, surrendering it to Armin who, in his hunger for information, forgot to get food and rushes over to get some.

You follow Jean outside where another wave of cold air closes like a fist around your lungs. The Military Post Office is the last one in a neat row of small, copper brick buildings designated to everything related to civil relations and administration.

The Post Master behind the counter is a wiry and thin man with a thick moustache and a weathered kerchief tied around his neck. He’s missing two teeth at the bottom, and after you finally make it to the front, he greets you with a wet cough, before asking in a gritty voice, “Name, District.”

“Kirschstein and [Last Name],” Jean says. Hands tucked into his coat pockets, he is bobbing up and down on his heels as if he’s hoping he might lift off. “Trost District.”

The Post Master wobbles for a moment, and you share a worried look with Jean. But he manages to stay on his feet, runs a gnarly finger over a long list until he finds your names, then turns around and goes to the back room to fetch your mailings. He returns with two big packages he can barely carry by himself, and drops them unceremoniously onto the counter. A big, wet snuffle is the only goodbye you get as you reach for your respective packages before other cadets behind you push you to the side for their turn.

Your fingers itch to rip the package open, dig through the presents, even though Wîhe Naht is weeks away, and read Ida’s reply. Three more hours to go before you can trek back to your barracks and snuggle up in your bed, share the sweets and toys from Felix with Mina and then hide under your warm blanket for whatever their response holds in store for you as the other girls prepare for bed.

Jean, feeling your agitation, glances at you sideways. “It’s gonna be fine,” he remarks. “Whatever Mom and Dad are saying in their letter, it’s in the past now anyway.”

“I’m aware letting it go would be easier,” you say, balancing the box from carrying it on one side to the other as if you were holding dynamite. “But that doesn’t change the fact that it happened. I just want closure, that’s all.”

“Wouldn’t that be something.” Jean sniffs, his breath coming out in white plums. “Erasing events from the past, making stuff never have happened. You’d have to be, like, God or something to do that.”

“I don’t know. I get you’d want the unpleasant stuff gone, but it’s what makes you the person you are today, right? Even all the bad stuff, I don’t think I’d want that just taken away from me.” Especially without you knowing.

When there’s no answer, you look up at Jean. He’s trying to stifle a yawn—not very discreetly. At the glare you send him, Jean just shrugs. “What. It’s too cold and I’m too tired to engage in a philosophical debate with you. Go ask Armin.”

Back in the classroom, you are only half a step over the threshold when your corpsmates’ heads turn toward you like hungry wolves smelling their prey. You don’t know when it has become tradition to share sweets and candies—at least by those who regularly receive gift packages from their families. Did it start with Mina’s Klippfisch or Hannah’s glacéed walnuts?

You watch as Jean, who has quickly turned it into a lucrative business, bargains with Connie and Franz what duties they would take over for him next week, when an impulse strikes you, sparking you into action like flint igniting a fire.

With your target nowhere in sight, you know one person who can answer the question about his whereabouts. Mikasa is sitting by the window, watching snowflakes whirl past in an angry flurry. She has a thoughtful gaze about her, as if even though the landscape before her is blindingly white, only she can discern the pictures hidden within. Memories, maybe. Her slender fingers play with loose threads of her red scarf. Armin, sitting beside her, is curled over an open book and doesn’t notice you approaching.

“Have you guys seen Eren?” you ask, already knowing that one definitely knows where he is. Mikasa breaks her gaze away from the window, blinking up at you dazedly as if she is waking up from a long dream. Not for the first time, she is considering you with a blank expression. You just don’t know what test you’re currently under and what might happen should you not pass.

“He’s just left the room,” she says, grey eyes darting to the exit. “Do you need something?”

“Nothing important.” You’re already half turned towards your new destination, swiping your hand over their desk and leaving two pieces of chocolate. Mikasa eyes it with a little suspicion, as if she doesn’t understand what it is until she picks it up. A half smile tugs at her lips. You don’t know if you’ve ever really seen her smile at anyone else except Armin and Eren.

You leave her nibbling on the chocolate, quietly trying to rouse Armin from his reading spree to make him eat his piece. The hallway outside is slowly emptying out as the remaining cadets slip into their classrooms. When you find Eren rounding a corner, you break out into a run until there is so much momentum that it is easier to grab him by his arms and swing you both around like a merry-go-round until you finally halt. Disoriented and surprised by the sudden attack, Eren needs a moment to understand what is happening.

“Wha—”

“Close your eyes,” you say.

Eren takes a step back, doubt cutting deep creases into his forehead as if you are trying to sell him Titan body parts. “Why?”

“Just do as you’re told. Trust me.”

His expression says it all. He doesn’t. But he closes his eyes anyway, brows furrowed.

“Open your mouth.”

He opens his eyes.

“Close your eyes and open your mouth.”

Eren does so, but he adds, “If this is another one of your pranks, I’m going to make you eat snow.”

You ignore him and reach for your pocket from where you produce another small piece of chocolate. You place it on Eren’s lips. He flinches, his eyes snapping open and you use his confusion to shove the whole piece inside his mouth, the pads of your fingers brushing his warm lips. The tip of his tongue darts forward, prods against your fingertips, hot and wet, and you hesitate for the break of a second before pulling your hand back as the feeling sends electric shocks from your hand up your arm and down to your belly.

The transformation on his face is instant when he closes his mouth, his jaw working as the chocolate melts on his tongue. It’s an expression you did not expect, and because of it, you throw your head back and laugh out loud.

“Why do you look so confused?” you ask, giving him a light shove.

Red creeps up his face, paints the tips of his ears. He throws an arm over his mouth, trying to hide it. “It’s so … sweet?”

“Yeah, it’s supposed to be like that.” You almost reach out to tug his arm down by his sleeve, wishing to see more, but Eren has already dropped it, now looking at you as if you are a puzzle he has spent too much time trying to solve and now he is considering throwing it against the wall.

“Why?” he asks.

“Well, there is a lot of sugar in it.”

“No, why are you giving it to me?”

The question catches you off guard, changes the gravity centre a little and uproots your safe foundation. You haven’t really thought about a deeper meaning, just that you wanted to share something you enjoy with him, something you know most people enjoyed, that would bring them happiness. Just like Mikasa and Armin. You wanted, you realise, to share a little happiness with Eren as well.

Which is something you definitely can’t and won’t admit to him out loud.

“You know, gaining favours, having you owe me something.” You shrug, trying to make it look extra nonchalant.

“So, now I owe you something after you almost shoved your fingers inside my mouth.” He crosses his arms in front of his broad chest, and gives you one of those insufferable grins that remind you of every picaresque trickster you have read about in stories—dashing and adventurous, but also daring and dangerous. You realise the part inside you that didn’t want to understand what exactly it is Eren dares you to do grows quieter and quieter, instead replaced by a growing voice that’s a little too eager to accept the challenge head-on.

You mimic his posture, aware of how your crossed arms push out your chest. There isn’t anything subtle about Eren, or the way his eyes drop down like a magnet to its pole. “You say that as if you didn’t like it, Jaeger.”

Eren’s eyes grow dark. He looks at you, his gaze sliding over you in a way that you know is like fingertips stroking over your skin. “I—”

“Hey, if you two squirts have time to stand out here and fuck around, you better be able to recount the whole operation without any mistakes!” Shadis’ voice roars up from the end of the corridor, his sharp, pinprick dots of eyes traverse the whole floor to hit you with a marksman’s precision.

You and Eren duck your heads as if that could spare you from Shadis’ wrath, immediately setting off together, a hasty walk that quickly turns into a race down the hall to see who is faster. Eren only wins because he cheats, his hand reaching down to pull at the harness on your leg only to let it snap back against the back of your thigh.

His laughter disappears as he dives into the classroom first, which is great because that means he doesn’t see your face going up in flames at the quick brush of his fingers against the back of your thigh.

True to his word, Shadis does make you two recount the operation and everything important for its success, which somehow you manage to recite without any problems.

Sadly, that did not prevent the events from nearly taking your life.

The cold punishes arrogance.

That was Shadis’ first lesson, one none of you took too seriously simply because you all, stemming from the southern parts within the Walls where winters are uncomfortable but that is pretty much it, lack the imagination to fully understand what it means to be cold.

“Keep in mind, safety first!” Shadis’ voice howls inside your head, louder than the wind tearing at the naked branches reaching for you like cold, broken fingers as you keep your head down, fighting against the wind trying to sweep you off your feet, eyes glued to Ymir’s boots in front of you. Looking up would hurt too much. The whirling snowflakes striking your skin hurt like pellets. “I’d rather have you maggots fail the objective than be stupid enough to die to hypothermia! Get frostbite and your pathetic little lives are over! Cold winter climate like this is the most difficult climate to manoeuvre! Even when not in combat, you’re still in a fight against the cold. Now out in those woods, the cold won’t be your only enemy. There are wolves, bears. The animals might kill you. But the cold will.”

You’ve checked your gear multiple times, made sure everything is safe inside your trekking back and nothing is missing. The winter coats, long enough to fall past your knees, shield you from the cold, keep you warm as long as you keep moving. You cannot allow one sliver of skin to be exposed to these extreme temperatures or you’ll grow numb immediately, completely freeze in maybe a few minutes. Dead in maybe an hour.

It helps to keep your mind completely fixed on the task. One foot in front of the other, step by step, in the same rhythm that Ymir and the rest march. You’ve completely lost any feeling for the time, and surrounded by this never-ending grey landscape, it could either still be early morning or afternoon already. Which would mean night is approaching and you do not want to be outside when the sun completely vanishes and leaves you in the dark. You can’t imagine how much colder it will be then.

As suddenly as the snowstorm has hit your formation, it dissolves for now. Risking a glance up, you can finally make out the dark, barren stems of trees, still bending in the harsh wind and creaking like old men lamenting their aching backs. Mountains stand tall in the distance, growing taller and taller as you march towards them. Behind them warm huts, burning fireplaces, and warm stews await your arrival. Two more hours, maybe three, and you can finally take off the padded coat and winter boots, the heavy backpack sinking you deeper into the snow with every step.

The cliffs rise higher as you progress, pocked with spots of darkness, like slashes of black paint. As you look more closely, you realise they are caves in the rock. Some look very deep, twisting away into darkness. You imagine bats and creepy-crawling things hiding in the blackness, and shiver.

At last a narrow path cutting through the cliffs leads you to a wide road, nearly completely frozen over. Anytime now, you think, having memorised the map around these areas until you could draw it with your eyes closed. The group begins to slow down, shuffling even closer now that movement ceases and in need of a different source of warmth. You feel Mina pressing up against your side, her gloved hands clutching tightly onto the straps of her backpack. She peeks over at you from under her furred hood, barely managing an exhausted smile. You reach under her hood and give her Rudolph-red nose a squeeze.

At the front, quiet murmur rises, the order passed from the first to the last man. You’d imagine Shadis would have a field trip shouting in a place like this where his voice would echo and grow tenfold, the only downside is that the avalanche following would kill you all swiftly.

Everyone shuffles into one line. You can feel the unrest and anxiety running through the rest like a wave carrying on from person to person. The need to stomp their feet against the creeping needle-fingered cold, the white death slowly advancing and sucking heat from any warm thing. But the narrow mountain pass snaking alongside the cliff’s wall doesn’t allow for two people walking side by side. You imagine freezing to death might be a bit more pleasant than a drop all the way down to the bottom of the mountain and breaking bones. Then again, you’d prefer not to die at all.

With the progress slowed down, you have no choice but to wait for your turn to squeeze alongside the steep cliff to the other side. Were it any other time, you’d enjoy the fantastic outlook over the valley. There’s nothing but mountains and trees as far as the eye can see, a winter wonderland reminding you of all the Wîhe Naht stories your mother used to read to you at night when you were both snuggling into warm comforters and blankets. You try to recount those stories now, of brave Lucia venturing out on a cold, dark, lightless night to find the sun and bring it back to the world, or the stories of Vaeterchen Frost and his granddaughter Schneefloeckchen travelling the lands to deliver presents, to pass time as Mina carefully shimmies along the edge to the other side. Singing songs in your head helps as well—just about anything that occupies you from thinking too much about the cold. What better way to pass time with winter songs.

Schneefloeckchen, Weissroeckchen / wann kommst du geschneit? / Du wohnst in den Wolken / dein Weg ist so weit.

A muffled sneeze interrupts your solo performance. There’s only a handful of cadets left bringing up the rear, comrades you’re able to recognise by their built now rather than seeing their faces after spending almost two years together. Franz glued to Hannah’s side, taking care that she doesn’t slip and fall. Annie, her height giving her away, kicking some frozen ice clumps off the cliff, watching them tumble down, sometimes growing as snow sticks to it. The last one is Eren, all gloomy and sulking like a little child and whenever he raises his head, watchful eyes scanning his surroundings, you don’t miss the feverish look on his face, his cheeks and nose a scarlet red you know has nothing to do with the cold.

No one had missed the argument between him and Mikasa this morning, one Eren ended by storming outside the Mess Hall, ignoring her calls. He wouldn’t be stopped from gathering experience during this mission, not even by the cold turning his voice raw and raspy, his nose runny. You can’t explain how he’s still standing, other than that sheer will power is driving him onward and whoever doubts it gets on Eren’s shit list. Three streaks and you’re out, Eren is not shy handing out punches—physically or verbally. Mikasa was the first to get the brunt of it, banished to the front of the line and as far away from Eren as physically possible just because he couldn’t stand her watching over him like a mother hen.

You felt bad then, watching Mikasa letting Eren stomp off, looking at him with frustration but also fondness—unable to decide if she should respect his wish and let him be alone or follow him to keep him safe. In the end, it was Armin, as usual, who negotiated and kept the peace between them, pulling Mikasa with him and making her his trek buddy.

Now, as you watch Mina reach the pass’ first half and Eren getting ready behind you, you can’t help and plead in Mikasa’s favour.

“You should have listened to Mikasa and stayed back,” you mumble, voice low enough for only him to hear.

Eren’s bad condition is only further proven by the lack of immediate retaliation, the time he needs to take in your words, process them and come up with a strong argument. It is a little like pushing a toddler off his feet and watching him trying to understand what just happened.

Finally, the response you get is the most unconvincing performance you’ve seen, one were it a stage play, you’d demand your money back.

“’M fine,” he slurs, bracing himself against the cliff’s side. He’s taking deep, rattling breaths, his mouth a pale gash in his feverish face. “We’re almost at our destination ‘nyway.”

You take the first careful step, hugging the wall. They always say ‘Don’t look down’ when standing too close to an edge with nothing but space between you and the ground, but that doesn’t work when you have to use ODM gear. Still, something about being in free fall is different than standing close to an edge with nothing but half a foot separating you plunging into your death. There is nothing quite describing this feeling except call of the void.

“You ever think that this isn’t just about you?” you ask him, feeling safer with your back pressed against the wall even though the outlook gives a splendid, stomach churning overview of the valley that has your toes curling. You miss the weight of your ODM gear, the knowledge that no matter if you fall right here, safety is but a click of your hooks and wires away. “Don’t expect any of us to carry you the rest of the way.” Certainly not Annie, his trek buddy. Not because she’s lacking the strength, rather you don’t think she has it in her heart to care about what happens to Eren. Or any of you.

At this point, Eren can barely make any distinguishable words. It sounds something like “Don’ worry ‘bout it,” which is the only signal you get to look to your right and see him sway precariously.

You don’t think. Instinct kicks in, and as he falls forward, you lunge for him, grabbing his backpack. Only that is exactly half the step you shouldn’t have taken.

The last thing you can make out is someone is trying to scream after you, quickly shushed by a firm hand on their mouth—you can only imagine it is Annie’s quick wit and reflex that prevents Hannah’s voice from causing an avalanche going off above their heads.

The fall slams your stomach up to your throat as the world turns into a blurry merry-go-round of white and ice, and the only stable thing is the additional weight of Eren as you hold onto his backpack’s strap for dear life. The first hit is the worst. You land awkwardly on your side, the blanket of snow buffering most of the impact as you tumble and roll further down, kicking up snow and dirt.

Gloved hands clawing into the ice, searching for roots to stop your fall, you try to scramble back up the hill but the snow gives under your feet—and then suddenly there is no ground beneath your feet and you fall again, flailing to find purchase and it is the longest two seconds of your life until your backpack hits the ground and your teeth clack together hard enough you feel it in all your bones.

A moment later, a second thud lands inside a pile of snow beside you.

All you can do is lie on your back like a turtle upturned, kicking and swinging and swaying as you try to scramble to your knees, blinking away fine snow dust from your lashes. Your heart still beats too fast, too hard—too scared from dodging Death’s cold, greedy talons by nothing more than a hairsbreadth. You can still feel him yearning for you in the cold, biting wind that picks up, in the coppery taste filling your mouth after having bitten the inside of your mouth during the fall.

You turn your back to the cliff. A snow-tipped forest stretches before you, illuminated in a haze of dusty gold beneath the late-afternoon sun. And in the distance, more ice-capped mountains rise and fall as far as the eye can see.

But you feel only the cold in your bones and see only the shadows that stretch long and dark beneath the pine trees. This is the south of the Walls, where winter days are not as bad as in the North, yet if you don’t find shelter before the sun sets, you will die.

You scramble to your feet, snow stuck to your coat and backpack weighing you down so much your knees buckle with the additional weight. The heaps of snow surrounding you remain motionless, still. The panic seizing you, freezing you in place for a moment, is colder than the snow before you lunge into the pile, clawing through the icy chunks that immediately freeze and harden as you dig your way through to Eren.

You find his arm first. He’s lost one of his gloves during the fall and you don’t try to push your luck finding it. Unearthing him takes a good amount of strength and time, but at least he is free from his icy coffin. Snow dusts his face, clings to the fur of his hood and his closed lashes like fine diamonds. You tug your glove off with your teeth and put your hand to his cheeks, feeling for his pulse. Despite the cold, his cheeks are still warm, still full of life, and the relief that sparks within you warms you like a small candle’s light.

You free him completely, pull him out and drag him away until he is laid out on the snowy floor, his breaths coming out in soft white plumes. No matter how often you say his name, pat his cheek and beg him to wake up, nothing disturbs Eren’s sleeping beauty slumber.

“You can’t die, all right?” you say to him. To yourself. To no one. “Please don’t. You’re a prick sometimes, but you can’t die, okay?”

There’s no response. You have never known silence this terrifying.

But fear and panic are not the solution. For two years Shadis has beat discipline and order into you with words and you would not allow this to crumble under the face of adversity.

More importantly, you will not leave Eren to be taken by the Grim Reaper.

Shelter. You need shelter, you need a fire. You have to survive this.

Checking your gear, you make sure you didn’t lose anything during your descent. Pulling Eren out of that pile of snow was already hard work. You doubt you’ll make it far if you’d try carrying him and his backpack, so you spend the next five minutes going through everything he has on him.

The contents of his bag are identical to yours: a raincover, additional rope and another survival knife, another pair of waterproof gloves that you quickly switch out with the one Eren’s wearing. You take his water bottle with you and stuff yourself with a sweet oat bar. The rest of his rations—dry crackers, another oat bar, thinly sliced rye bread and hard biscuits—you stuff into your own back for later if he wakes up.

When he wakes up, you correct yourself, chewing on the bar without really tasting anything. You doubt something like a fever and a fall from this height that barely left you with a scratch could kill a public menace like Eren. The world wouldn’t miss out to see how far he’ll go.

Now looking up, it actually does surprise you how unscathed you’ve emerged from the fall. A canopy of barren trees obscures your sight of the top. Protocol says that any loss to the formation is to be diminished. Unfortunately, that means everyone is out for themselves, and those who manage to lose the group have to find their own way back. But not with the sun descending behind the horizon, and Eren still unconscious.

When you’ve steeled yourself for the arduous task, you slide the bag off Eren’s back and throw him over your shoulders, huffing at the additional weight. If you keep following the trail back along the cliff side, you should return to where you’ve earlier seen the caves and find shelter there for the night.

Soon you are in the heart of the woods, surrounded by tall, crowding pines and frost-larches that cast their shadows over you. A hush has settled in the air. It feels as though the forest is alive and watching, the cold creeping steadily past your clothes, under your skin, into your bones. Every step further turns into an excruciating fight to keep Eren upright, his weight pushing you down into the thick blanket of snow.

Darkness has steadily crept in around you, and you have to blink to make out which are the trees and which are the shadows. Time seems to go in circles, and you begin to wonder whether you are going in circles. The unbearable cold is addling your brain; you keep looking to the left and right, imagining the occasional crackle of a branch or crunch of snow. You remember your mother’s stories about never-ending winters where ice spirits dwell to spirit away the last remaining humans locked up inside their tiny huts in hopes for spring to come. Wolves that spring from thin air and hunt in packs. That is exactly why Shadis had told your class to never travel without a light source on you that burns steadily through the night to ward off the creatures lurking in the woods. Now the darkness seems to press against you.

Then, you hear it. The snap-snap-snap of twigs and the rustle of the underbrush, several dozen paces behind you.

Someone—or something—is following you.

Fear pricks at you. You duck behind the nearest tree, and after rebalancing Eren on your back, you still and strain to listen over the hammering of your heart.

There. Rustling and crackling approaches, as though something large is moving through the trees. Holding your breath, you dare a look from behind the tree and feel your legs turn to cotton.

Multiple swift, dark shapes slither by, so close that their musty wet-animal scent wafts past you. They circle you, sniffing the air and letting out deep-throated growls. As they turn their heads to rivet their black, evil eyes on you, your heart sinks. Wolves. A pack of hungry, desperate wolves.

Your mind kicks into action as you press Eren’s body closer to yours. One wrong movement and your life will be over; Eren’s life will be over. Now that they have picked up your scent, they will hunt you until their razor-sharp fangs tear the meat from your bones, squeeze their tongue in to suck out your marrow.

Slowly, painfully aware that you cannot do any rash moves, you lower Eren to the ground first, then your backpack. There is no way you can outrun them. Your hand inches to the survival knife strapped to the belt around your coat, fingers numb and shaking. The wolves crouch, low and snarling. One of them, their leader you assume, stands between you and the rest, a mountain of growling, brindled fur, shoulders hunched forward, lips curled back over snarling teeth.

It snarls again, crouching closer to the ground. Its growl is more than just Look, here is a human in our territory and we can do whatever we please. No, this growl means We have not eaten in days, and now it is time to feast.

The wolf’s lips draw back to show its teeth, and you see its lolling tongue. And then it launches itself forward, jaws gaping, ready to tear. You have barely time to draw your knife as it strikes you square in the chest, and you two go over in a writhing tangle.

Your screams go under the lethal snap of his jaw, its target the soft flesh of your throat where he can easily rip you to shreds. The smell of dirt and wet dog and something far more unpleasant threatens to choke you. The weight of this beast robs you of any chance to fight back. You’d just have to move your arm and bring upon it the sharp edge of your knife to show him your own talons are as sharp—everything inside you screams against this. You hate to see animals suffer, to inflict pain upon the most innocent creatures.

If only the wolf would think so of you as well.

But the wolf is starving, and its mates are starving. It sees you as nothing more than a walking slab of meat. And that is why it has no problem to throw its head back and pierce those razor-sharp fangs right through the fabric of your coat into your arm and tear at your flesh.

❀❀❀

My darling [Name],

I have always known the day would come when you would remember and yet nothing prepares the heart for adversity as great as finding yourself facing the struggle you’ve tried to brace yourself for.

What Jeanie told you is the truth. I still remember reading your mother’s letter, feeling her distraught with every word. I swear I feared my heart would stop beating reading your mother’s recount of the events.

You must have been ten—the age when everything is a mystery and a great adventure. I remember whenever you and Jeanie went outside to play, you wouldn’t come back for hours and when you finally returned you were both covered in dust and grime from head to toe. I assume that is why, on that day, your parents weren’t worried why you were staying out for so long.

But then, your mother wrote, your friend had come over, asking for your whereabouts. That made her wonder, at last. Were you not supposed to be with him? I know he was very dear to you, I remember you talking about him so much, and strangely, I cannot remember his name or face, even though I know I must have met him at some point when visiting you.

Your mother and father immediately set out to ask around the neighbourhood if someone saw you. The result shocked your little community quite. The old veteran living on the outskirts close to the wall, who everyone believed to be blind turned out to have impeccable eyesight. We believe he lured you away, asked you to help him and you have never been someone to turn away from those who need help.

It was your father who found you. The veteran attacked him, scared what would happen to him if everyone knew about his secret. I don’t know how much you saw of it, of what your father had to do to protect you both. We were all grateful he saved you, and yet there is a part of me wondering if taking that old man’s life really was necessary. If it wasn’t possible to resolve things differently. Then again, any parent would make a deal with the Devil, I am sure, to keep their child safe.

The fact that your early life is built upon violence and loss pains me to this day. It must have been such a great shock that you had completely repressed any memory of the events, and had no recollection of ever having been kidnapped and taken away by that monster.

I do wonder though, why you have remembered now of all times—and such strange details as well! Not all is clear to me, there was no need to make your parents go through the pain of remembering all that by asking them too much. But a green wallpaper with golden lilies on it? That doesn’t sound like something you would find in Shiganshina. I did hear that it is a popular interior design choice within the inner Walls though.

But how did you know?

I think that is enough talk of that. Your graduation approaches. It is strange to believe that only two years ago, we last saw each other, and the next time we hopefully will, you and Jeanie will be full-fledged soldiers. You know I have never fully approved of you two going and giving up your young lives to a cause with no end. But I have been young once as well, and I know that nobody wants to be saved from their own ambition.

I am just glad you two have decided to stay within the Walls, and that makes it a little easier to sleep at night.

Until we see each other next time, please enjoy our little presents.

In love, always Ida

A/N: After finishing this I realised there is no way they would have chocolate on the island because they wouldn’t be able to plant cacao. Might go back and edit this, but for now let’s just ignore this.

feel free to head over to my pinned post to find my ko-fi link if you enjoy the story wanna fuel me with some coffee! ♥

Sources of research for this chapter: • London, Jack: To Build a Fire (1902) • Geller, Jacob: Fear of Cold (2022) • Campbell, John W.: Who Goes There? (1938)

taglist: @arisu003, @brooki, @prttyangelbaby, @honeylmnade

#didn't mean to split the chapter but it all would have been too long #next chapter will be so much fun because EMIL #aot x reader #aot x you #aot x y/n #eren x reader #eren x you #eren x y/n #eren jaeger x reader #eren yeager x reader #swyaatl

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tired-reader-writer · 9 months

Note

OC alphabet soup game for K?

KAZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAI

He's the lady of the castle in all but gender. The household servants defer to him as they would the lord's wife and he is their lord's spouse, and he's very well beloved by them which is a feat considering the fact that he barged into the castle and tried to strangle Shapur all those years ago.

Hey, grief makes you do unwise things. He thought Shapur was involved w the attack that killed his sister and brother-in-law.

He was the one chosen by Rajendra for the Adikalania, the duel before the gods, because Rajendra perceived Kazai's magical abilities as being blessed by some gods and hey, better to pick someone who is favored by the gods for this duel before the gods thing, even if it's not your own gods, right? And since Kazai had already grown infamous for being favored by the divine and a monster on the battlefield (to the point someone who knew about clan history would say “No wonder they were called divine weapons of the gods.”) Gadhevi freaked out as in canon and picked Bahadur in response.

Kazai won.

By ripping out Bahadur's throat with his teeth.

Shapur, who thought he was going to lose Kazai to this duel (because Kazai was being a tad too cautious w his magic lest he be accused of cheating and didn't know Bahadur couldn't feel pain he got quite injured), embraced him as soon as he could, not caring about the stares or the blood on Kazai's body— and let Kazai nestle his face in his neck to which people were like “????? dude did you not see what he did to that other guy's throat??? why tf are you letting him put his face near your neck????”

Back when Shapur was still trying to get Ayunnen and Kashi and Kazai to come with him to his castle Kazai was the only one who was just a little bit interested instead of scared like the other two were. Also, I don't know if I've talked about this before but he was born to a concubine of Some Rich Dude which the main wife Did Not Like and tried to kill him and his mom was trying to protect him and things went to shit and ended up w the main wife dead. Charged w murder, some huge punishment was waiting ahead for both the mom and her two little kids (3yo Kashi and infant Kazai), maybe enslavement, maybe imprisonment, I don't know, but things were grim until a sympathetic guard slipped them out and so they were on the run— and at some unspecified point the mother dies and Kashi has to contend w protecting Kazai all alone at like, toddler age. Also they got picked up and raised by wolves so... yeah. Feral little babies! Until somebody from the clan found them and took them in. Kashi chilled out somewhat (still terrifying in battle though, more like concentrated and stockpiled until she sees fit to release it) but Kazai's Wildness™ is less contained. Though many in the castle kinda perceived him as some sort of wildcat, the full potential of his feralness came out after Arslan got horribly maimed. He's angry and it shows.

His original birth name was not Kazai as Kashi's wasn't Kashi, they were something else entirely, Parsian names, but they both discarded it as society discarded them. Kazai wishes he remembered their mother.

They both inherited their mother's black hair. Everything else is up in the air but that much I am certain.

In the first ever ArSen AU I wrote (RHoG) I made Elam go all starry-eyed at Kazai because of how he makes so many things more convenient in the domestic setting. I wonder if I should retain that.

#kazai (oc)#ask game #kashi (oc)

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apocalypticavolition · 9 months

Text

Let's (re)Read The Eye of the World! Chapter 3: The Peddler

Welcome back to my reread of The Wheel of Time with all sorts of hideous spoilers you should be running away from if you don't want to know them. Run like your britches are on fire, or I guess the opposite of that since if you're on fire you should probably stop.

Anyway, this chapter begins with the Dragon's Fang symbol, which typically symbolizes male channeling, Dragons real and false, and sometimes Darkfriends in these early books. This time around it's probably mostly about the news that's come into town.

The man on the wagon was Padan Fain, a pale, skinny fellow with gangly arms and a massive beak of a nose. Fain, always smiling and laughing as if he knew a joke that no one else knew, had driven his wagon and team into Emond’s Field every spring for as long as Rand could remember.

It is just a wee bit unfortunate that Fain's got the Jewish-coded nose situation, what with him being a merchant and also having a low-key obsession with murdering the current incarnation of Jesus.

Also the joke is he hates you all and hopes you die.

Fain, however, spoke freely if often teasingly, and spun out the telling, making a show to rival a gleeman. He enjoyed being the center of attention, strutting around like an under-sized rooster, with every eye on him.

It's probably this character defect that explains both why he fell to the Shadow and rose so quickly through the ranks to end up a lowkey Forsaken type. Dude probably heard that saying the Dark One's name got his attention and started chanting it under his breath wherever he went to the point that a Darkfriend had to be dispatched just to get him to STOP.

...his friendliness had always been of a peculiarly distant kind, backslapping without ever getting close.

Just practicing for the backstab, that Fain.

He'd be a great villain if in addition to sidestepping fate itself he didn't end up sidestepping the plot. Guess in a series all about fate, doing one is necessarily doing the other. But that's something else to get around to later.

“I had been thinking you were going to stay out on the farm through the whole Festival,” Perrin Aybara shouted at Rand over the clamor.

It's Perrin. I'd be excited about this but... Meh. He's probably my least favorite of the six main characters. I don't hate him but... Well, we'll get there.

Nice of him to finally show up though. (Nice of the show to put him in the mix right away.)

He could easily have pushed through the throng, but that was not his way. He picked his path carefully, offering apologies to people who had only half a mind to notice anything but the peddler. He made the apologies anyway, and tried not to jostle anyone as he worked through the crowd to Rand and Mat.

Note here that Perrin's way is "Do something in the least efficient way possible while offering up a lot of performative bullshit that does absolutely no one any good and is completely ignored anyway." We'll be coming back to this in book four if not sooner.

Rand’s last words exploded into utter silence, catching the peddler with an arm raised dramatically and his mouth open. Everybody turned to stare at Rand.

I dunno, the "protagonist accidentally shouts something that everyone hears due to an unexpected silence" shtick works better when it's genuinely hurtful or embarrassing. You'd think a bro telling someone "We'll talk later," would be the exact kinda shit you'd expect to hear right as it goes quiet at this kinda shindig.

His friends shifted uncomfortably, too. It had only been the year before that Fain had taken notice of them for the first time, acknowledging them as men. Fain did not usually have time for anyone too young to buy a good deal of things off his wagon.

Considering that none of the three of you have the means or reason to buy a good deal of stuff off of the wagon even now, I suspect Fain's interest is based a lot more in the whole hunting you down thing.

“What could be worse than wolves killing sheep, and men?” Cenn Buie demanded. Others muttered in support.

This is a very low-key thing to note in the Jordan Gender Jamboree, but as you'd expect for someone of his age, and not as you might expect for a land that is supposed to be gender neutral and might even be a bit pro-woman (nowhere near as much as real life is pro-man though), the gender neutral term for a person is "man".

“It’s evil times! No one claiming to be the Dragon Reborn for twenty years, and now three in the last five years. Evil times! Look at the weather!”

Gonna be six (add Taim, the unnamed False Dragon of Haddon Mirk, and Rand himself) in as many years in just a few months. Everyone except the dude who confused the DR with the DO is being pretty reasonable despite the general sense that they're being a bit panicky. Life's about to suck for you people.

“I didn’t hear Fain say this was a false Dragon. Did you? Use your eyes! Where are the crops that should be knee high or better? Why is it still winter when spring should be here a month?”

Again, Cenn Buie isn't quite as wrong as the narrative tries to play him off as. Logain ain't the real deal but he and the weather are portents of the end of the age.

A stunned silence fell. Rand looked at his friends. Perrin seemed to be seeing things he did not like, but Mat still looked excited.

This is dramatic irony because of course Perrin will be the kinder friend when it turns out Rand can channel and Mat will be a little racist about it. Though Perrin does dip out sooner while Mat stays to be helpful as long as he can.

“Enough of that from you, boy.” Cenn shook a gnarled fist in Ewin’s face. “Show a proper respect and leave this to your elders. Get away with you!”

And here's where Cenn veers back into the unequestionable dick category. Ewin's also got a point, and the narrative and Moiraine will be answering his question ("Why would a man channel if the taint ensures a fate worse than death?") soon.

“A party of them has ridden south from Tar Valon. Since he can wield the Power, none but Aes Sedai can defeat him, for all the battles they fight, or deal with him once he’s defeated. If he is defeated.”

And this right here is the driving force behind all of the societies of the Third Age (and one of the subtle indications that the AoL wasn't all that great, because they're actually mid-tier in their answer and below the modern west): how do you deal with channelers? Sadly, most societies chose to answer with, "Not very well."

That was Wit Congar; he hunched his shoulders at the stares some of the others gave him, but he held his ground.

Wit's priorities check out. Logain's in Ghealdan, which is close but not so close as to be an immediate threat. Daise is right here in town and she's already pissed and she wants her fucking pins.

Aes Sedai and wars and false Dragons: those were the stuff of stories told late at night in front of the fireplace, with one candle making strange shapes on the wall and the wind howling against the shutters. On the whole, he believed he would rather have blizzards and wolves.

This isn't quite dramatic irony because on the whole Rand's opinion never changes. Dude wants blizzards and wolves instead of the crap he has to deal with the whole damn time.

“Not if it means Aes Sedai here, either,” Rand added. “Or have you forgotten who caused the Breaking? The Dragon may have started it, but it was Aes Sedai who actually broke the world.”

Way to pass the buck, Mr. Dragon.

But I think a lot of the fandom forgets about this misconception when they're confused about why people are so mistrustful of Aes Sedai. The average person doesn't fully parse that "dude Aes Sedai went crazy and fucked the planet," they miss that first word and so in many ways Tar Valon is a potential powder keg in their eyes.

“What kind of need would be great enough that we’d want the Dragon to save us from it?” Rand mused. “As well ask for help from the Dark One.”

Answering your own question there, aren't you?

“Burn me!” Mat growled. “I’m only telling you what the guard said.”

Sorry Mat, I have to side with Perrin here and I never like not taking your side, but the last few years have taught me pretty well that people who repeat bullshit are just as much of a problem as the bullshitters.

Mat’s grin broadened. “It was last spring, just before the cutworm got into his fields and nobody else’s. Right before everybody in his house came down with yelloweye fever. I heard him do it. He still says he doesn’t believe, but whenever I ask him to name the Dark One now, he throws something at me.”

It's rough being an atheist in a world where at least one sort-of deity is perfectly happy to fuck you up, isn't it Bili?

Nynaeve al’Meara stepped into their huddle, the dark braid pulled over her shoulder almost bristling with anger.

Nynaeve! <3

It's going to be so wonderful when you put the sticks down and start beating people with the power of your soul instead, though. I can't really approve of a society where anyone, man or woman, is allowed to walk around beating people, even if it's someone as wonderful as Nynaeve is going to be.

Egwene stood a few paces behind the Wisdom, watching intently. Of a height with Nynaeve, and with the same dark coloring, she could at that moment have been a reflection of Nynaeve’s mood, arms crossed beneath her breasts, mouth tight with disapproval. The hood of her soft gray cloak shaded her face, and her big brown eyes held no laughter now.

And the last of the EF5 appears! Egwene's a really interesting character because of how well she throws herself into whatever culture she's in, so it's only natural that she starts out aping Nynaeve perfectly.

At the best of times he was never very nimble with his tongue when talking to any of the village girls, not like Perrin...

It's the first appearance of the fandom's favorite running gag. All three of the boys are absolutely convinced they're the worst at talking to girls. I think the narrative wants to suggest that they're all mostly alright at it except under big pressures, but I take a different tack: they are all equally awful at it and so wool-headed they don't understand that their best buds are just as bad as they are.

"...If I know them, they’re asking all the wrong questions and none of the right ones. It will take the Women’s Circle to find out anything useful."

This is taking the battle of the sexes really almost too far just because I can't possibly understand what questions Nynaeve thinks are wrong or unasked.

“Will you dance with me tomorrow?” That was not what he had meant to say. He did want to dance with her, but at the same time he wanted nothing so little as the uncomfortable way he was sure to feel while he was with her. The way he felt right then.

It's too abrupt a segue, he's lucky Egwene likes teasing him or she'd never have said yes.

Somehow, it had never occurred to him that she would reach marriageable age at the same time that he did.

It is pretty odd! Egwene is two years younger than he is and generally the sorts of societies where girls are eligible younger instead of at the same time are patriarchal ones where they're traded around like livestock. With livestock, when dowries are involved.

A proper egalitarian society wouldn't be rushing girls into adulthood and marriage sooner, especially since at 16 plenty of them will still be physically maturing. (And note that even at 18 both sexes are still mentally maturing.)

Egwene gave an exasperated sigh. “Well, maybe I’m strange, too. Maybe I want to see some of the places I hear about in the stories. Have you ever thought of that?”

Since I'm going to give Jordan lots of gender-related shit, I will give him props for having a story where the boys all really wanna stay home and not deal with epic adventures while the main girl is desperate to set out, see some interesting sights, and make something of herself in the process. It's a good and universal motivation and more fictional women need it!

“Of course I have. I daydream sometimes, but I know the difference between daydreams and what’s real.”

Not for long you don't! Of course, Egwene won't either due to her T'A'R habits. Really, by the end of the series both of you will have come to the independent conclusion that the world of dreams is the baseline, true reality while the physical world you inhabit is just a collective daydream everyone's having.

“That wasn’t what I meant. I was talking about me. Egwene?”

No Rand, you definitely were talking about both of you. You really are bad with the ladies and in this fight Egwene is not being silly at all to take offense to your words. Maybe you should see if Tam can buy a dictionary off of Fain while he's here so you can perfect your rhetoric.

“So he believed you,” Rand said, but Perrin shrugged.

Luhhan never gets the attention that Tam does, but he's definitely a good father figure. Bonus points to him for not ever dying or nearly dying.

“And you’ve been spreading these tales. Sometimes you have no sense, Rand al’Thor. The winter has been frightening enough without you going about scaring the children.”

One of Egwene's more unfortunate character flaws is her tendency to see the worst in all of her friends whenever the opportunity arises. I'm probably going to discuss this too because I have very complicated feelings about her - when she's aces she's aces but... Well, being snippy at Rand here is not the worst of what's to come. Frankly, Rand doesn't even get her at her absolute worst.

...the door of the inn opened and a man with shaggy white hair came hurrying out as if pursued.

Hooray for Thom! With his arrival, we've seen the entirety of the main TEotW party, though there's still several more main characters this book is going to introduce (and really we don't stop meeting mains until like book 9). Sadly, this is the end of the chapter, so I'll be stopping here.

Next time: Queen Elizabeth II! Sally Ride! Advice columnists no one remembers anymore! Nuclear annihilation! Stuff happening contemporaneously with the narrative instead of occurring some ten thousand years prior!

#let's read #wheel of time #the eye of the world #wot spoilers #wheel of time spoilers #rand al'thor #tam al'thor #mat cauthon #perrin aybara #egwene al'vere #nynaeve al'meara #padan fain #thom merrilin

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sterek-stuffs · 1 year

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I posted 3,750 times in 2022

That's 1,459 more posts than 2021!

6 posts created (0%)

3,744 posts reblogged (100%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@clotpolesonly

@isthatbloodonhisshirt

@evanesdust

@wellhalesbells

@outtoshatter

I tagged 1,895 of my posts in 2022

Only 49% of my posts had no tags

#queueue - 1,500 posts

#fic recs - 5 posts

#🥺 - 5 posts

#i love this - 5 posts

#sterek - 5 posts

#to read - 4 posts

#oooh - 4 posts

#love it - 4 posts

#this is so cute - 4 posts

#this is so cool! - 4 posts

Longest Tag: 115 characters

#the more he thought about it‚ the more he came to the somewhat startling realization that he might be okay with it.

My Top Posts in 2022:

NSFW Tag Game

The lovely @raisesomehale tagged me (well, my main which is RobotCorsair) in this bingo! Thanks for tagging me, this was fun! And sorry I didn't get a single one hahaha 😅 I enjoy a light sprinkling of smut on my fic but I rarely consume it as a main dish 😉 Some of the ones I marked I enjoy in very specific cases only, but when they match my tastes? Chef's kiss!

Card made by @loserchildhotpants! You can find it here!

(I'm not tagging anyone specific but if you see this and feel like doing it just tag me, I want to see it!)

3 notes - Posted July 29, 2022

Soft

having a smooth surface or texture that is pleasant to touch; not rough or coarse.

having a pleasing quality involving a subtle effect or contrast rather than sharp definition.

800 words - G

Tags: Pre-Slash, Fluff, Wolf Derek Hale, Sheriff Stilinski's Name is John, Ficlet, Cuddling & Snuggling, Sharing a Bed, Platonic Bed-sharing

12 notes - Posted June 14, 2022

Stiles buys this cd for Derek as a Christmas gift

22 notes - Posted November 23, 2022

Dear Fellow Traveler

written by: lanalua (sterek-stuffs) with art by @berrysterek

Rating: M (getting together, magic!Stiles, initial Stydia, endgame Sterek, Stiles leaves Beacon Hills, Stiles comes back to Beacon Hills)

Excerpt:

“Hey,” Stiles said when he was close enough for it to not be weird. Then he remembered Derek could have, and probably had, heard him from the house. Derek nodded, “I didn’t figure you for an early riser.” “Ha. I am full of surprises!” Stiles was in a good mood. “I see that. I thought you’d be back in New York by now.” Derek had a way of getting straight to the point. Stiles would have admired it if it wasn’t so annoying, so often. “Well, I decided to stay a bit longer, after our conversation that day, you know?” Was that a weird thing to admit to an… acquaintance? Friend? Trauma buddy? Whatever, it was too late now. He decided to turn things around on Derek. “Also, dude, are you staying here? What about your loft?” He was close enough now that Stiles could see his cheeks were a bit red, although whether from embarrassment or the cold he couldn’t tell. Derek shook his head. “I have a room at the motel. I’m not staying here.” Stiles raised his brows. “You’re such a bad liar!” Derek breathed what could be a laugh. “I’m not. It was just for tonight, I wanted to start work early today. Start tearing it down soon. It was easier to just stay here.” “And you’re clearly not a morning person.” Stiles quickly steered the conversation away from depressing topics. He meant to embarrass Derek, not make him think about his morbid past. Derek’s smirk showed a hint of fang. “Wolves are nocturnal.” “That’s not even true, you know? Wolves are totally crepuscular, so really, you should have been fully awake and ready to face the day by dawn, at the latest.” Derek’s smirk softened into a smile, like he was pleasantly surprised at Stiles’ knowledge of random wolf facts. What did he expect? Stiles had gone into so many research spirals back in high school, looking into the behavior of wolves in the hopes of better understanding his lupine friends - well, and his enemies, if he was being honest. Guess the information had stuck with him even after all these years.

Coming soon to the @twsterekbigbang !!

102 notes - Posted June 6, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Fics that came out this year and you might have missed, but that are absolutely worth checking out!

among your heart-shaped leaves by dappledawndrawn

After rebuilding the Hale house, Derek enlists Stiles' help in planting a garden.

Bite the Moonlight & Bleed Gold by raisesomehale

Seven years after being tricked and imprisoned by the Argents, Derek Hale finds himself off the blistering coasts of Antarctica aboard the Argentum Domina, an illegal prison ship out of which the Argents operate their behemoth, underground poaching empire. Derek, a bitter, pack-less alpha, spends his days working off his servitude by poaching creatures for Gerard to sell on the Black Magic Market, just trying to retain his sanity as he earns back the years of his life one capture at a time. But there doesn't seem to be an end, or future, in sight for him. Until, everything changes when Allison Argent brings him a capture case with a reward price so ludicrous that he has no choice but to accept. The only problem is, the target creature shouldn't even exist. Derek is flung fast into the deep webbings of a bigger mystery than he could have ever imagined. And discovers that, like this enchanting creature, not everything is as it seems. Can Derek unmask the schemes that threaten not only his life, but the state of the very world itself? And if doing so means losing the unexpected love he finds along the way, will he be willing to make that sacrifice?

The Bright Side of Disaster by Gia279

Tucked between fresh harvested vegetables and fruits, homemade skincare products and lovingly knit scarves and sewn shawls, were booths and tables selling potions, amulets, crystals, and herbs, athames and wands, scrying glasses and hand-embroidered altar cloths. Beacon Hills was a hotbed for magical activity, and it drew the supernatural community like moths to a flame. There were rumors that magical tools crafted in town were more powerful, potions more effective, even herbs more potent.

buyer bonus by elisela

When he walks back to the table, Derek’s out of his seat before he can think better of it. He’s going to ask him out. He’s going to go over there, he’s not going to say the man has a mouth he’ll dream about or give any cheesy, half-assed pick-up line, and he’s going to ask him if he would like to get coffee some time. Maybe he’ll skip that and go straight for dinner, or the bookstore. Derek’s heard you can learn a lot about a person by what they read. He’s cool. He can do this. “Hi,” he says, eyes flickering down to the glossy pamphlets of houses for sale that litter the table, and when panic overtakes him, what comes out of his mouth isn’t any of those things. “I’m thinking about buying a new place. Are you an agent?” Ah, crap.

Waning Crescent by Dexterous_Sinistrous

Derek’s scent was a heady warmth that enveloped Stiles’ senses. It was like the first strike of rain in a dried forest. A crisp smokiness to the tickle of petrichor. It lit up an unfamiliar spark in Stiles’ gut. And for the first time in a couple hundred years, his fangs ached.

how long will it take (to finally atone) by lookingforatardis

“I could hurt you,” Stiles says quietly, and doesn’t quite understand why he’s being honest himself. “You wouldn’t.” “I did, though. I did, Derek.” Stiles’ voice shakes and he has to pull his attention away from Derek to calm himself down from the sudden flash of memory. Silence fills the room until it’s uncomfortable, until Stiles has to look, and finds Derek watching him with a closed expression. “That was the nogitsune,” he tells him. “Not you.” Or: Void hurts Derek while possessing Stiles and Stiles has an extremely hard time recovering from what Void did to Derek even after the nogitsune is gone. The thought of touching him sends him into a blind panic, terrifying him as if every touch will hurt him all over again. Stiles can only take so much, after all, and Derek has always been his weak spot.

Don't forget to leave the authors some love!

185 notes - Posted August 26, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #thank you everyone

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cassandrajoybellbittner · 3 months

Text

*Warning Adult Content*

A PACK ALLIANCE - Chapter 23

Adyen

The tension in the room was thick.

So thick that I wasn't even sure a knife would help cut through it at this point.

I was sitting to the side of Naylan and Georgiou who were both staring at each other intently.

I wasn't sure if they were doing some weird inspection thing that was mandatory that I didn't know about or if they were just being petty for the sake of it.

We were in what I had come to know as the meeting room at the top of Georgiou's Pizzeria.

The room would be silent if it wasn't for the sound seeping into it from the eatery at the bottom.

"I came to apologize," Naylan started, saying his first words since we came into this room together thirty minutes ago.

Georgiou relaxed at my brother's words.

His shoulders slacked and he leaned back on the armchair he was sitting on.

"So, I heard," he said in a raspy voice, folding his hands on his lap as he kept looking at Naylan.

Despite his demeanor, I could still see hints of his alertness from before.

Len had explained to me that in the truest of senses, Georgiou was not born an Alpha and that Naylan was, so even though they would be talking to each other as equals there was a sure chance that Georgiou would be relatively uneasy.

Leigh was supposed to be here with us but something had come up and she had to go into the main city on her motorcycle and wouldn't be back for hours.

Naylan hummed. His voice was deep as his eyes drifted from corner to corner.

"When I started leading my pack it was just a bunch of kids trying to make ends meet," Naylan said, leaning forward.

The action seemed to surprise Georgiou.

"Yes, we might have stolen a thing or two but we respect you. I respect you," he made clear, not straightening out his pose.

"One day I want to lead a group like yours," my brother continued.

"You should sit up," Georgiou said, looking down at Naylan.

He sounded uncomfortable because of the dynamic I suppose.

"I will, if you accept my apology and listen to me," Nylan said.

"Please," he added after a pause.

Georgiou sighed, closing his eyes.

I could see the frustration on his face and the way his eyebrows were arched in annoyance.

It was the first time I had ever looked at him and thought he was old.

Not retirement old or anything but old as an adult.

I've always known him as the goofy surfer dude that made bad pizza but now he looked his age in front of Naylan who was begging him to accept his apology.

"Alright," the blond-haired man said after a while.

Naylan raised his head and I noticed a slight smile on his lips.

"Thank you," he said, clasping his hands together.

"As I was saying," he looked down at the floor, maybe not trying to invoke the innate fair other wolves were supposed to have of him.

I wondered how that felt like... having people keep their distance because you were on some weird hardwired biological hierarchy.

"So, we're now at the edges of the city with a bunch of wolves who are barely in their twenties and some of them speak only French," Naylan.

"Why are you telling me this?" Georgiou asked and Naylan laughed a bit.

"We just met properly," Naylan started saying before rubbing the back of his neck.

"But I want to ask for your help. I don't want us to just drive around stealing stuff. I know that was a bad idea..." he trailed.

Georgiou raised a brow at him.

"Help?"

"Jobs, organization help, getting IDs..." Naylan trailed and Georgiou nodded his head, humming a bit.

I shifted on my seat and the two of them turned to look at me.

They seemed almost confused as to why I was in with them.

"Sorry," I mumbled under my breath, holding on to the armrests.

"I'll just fade back into the background if you don't mind," I said, trying to tell a joke but neither seemed interested and they went back to talking to themselves.

"What makes you think I'd want to help you?" Georgiou asked Naylan, catching me off guard.

That sounded very unlike him.

Naylan laughed.

"You know, I've been in Toronto for quite a bit," he said, letting his dark eyes fall to his shoes.

"A lot of people seem to think you're quite kind, so I'm banking on believing them."

Georgiou smiled at that.

Had the former posturing been all business talk stuff?

I don't know. I don't understand a lot of this stuff.

"They're quite right," Georgiou said before his smile thinned out and a serious look took form on his face.

"But, to be quite serious it's a lot to ask me to take care of two packs at the same time. What do you have for me that would make it worth it?"

"Right now, we're living in the abandoned apartments as I explained," Naylan said and Georgiou nodded.

"We can't stay there forever. The local government's going to be pushed to deal with a bunch of homeless folks sooner or later."

Georgiou nodded again.

"Yeah, I got that."

"Well, in the summer, I plan to expand a bit into the woods," Naylan said.

Georgiou raised a brow at that.

"You think you can handle living in the woods."

Naylan nodded.

"Yeah, mum and I used to live off the land for a bit," he explained and a small part of me sunk a little, knowing that there were some memories he would have shared with my mum that I just would never have.

"Anyway," my brother started saying, bringing me out of my thoughts.

"I brought up the woods because of fish and wood and hopefully produce..." Naylan trailed, looking directly at Georgiou for the first time in a while.

"We can share that," Naylan said.

"You know, if you can help us get started and settle down," he added.

"What do you say?" Naylan asked after some extended silence from Georgiou.

"Tempting," Georgiou said, resting back on his armchair.

"Your expenses will get cut by a lot," Naylan offered, leaning forward.

"I don't know how your budget is doing but having some free cash isn't a bad idea no matter how well you're off," he explained.

Maybe Naylan didn't come off as having a good head on his shoulders initially but I could see that Georgiou was impressed with him.

He sounded like he knew what he was talking about and maybe the older man was taking a liking to him.

Georgiou smiled.

"Alright, kiddo, sounds like a deal," he said, reaching out a hand that Naylan didn't hesitate to take a hold of.

"Is this a pack alliance of some sort?" Naylan asked, the excitement lacing his voice quite obvious.

"You can call it that," Georgiou said as they broke their handshake and Naylan broke into a grin.

My muscles relaxed when the two got up.

Naylan walked over to me and tucked his hands into his pockets as Georgiou wandered out of the room, asking if his wife was back in a shout as he headed down the stairs.

"He's pretty cool, isn't he?" Naylan said, making me look over at him.

I shrugged.

"I guess."

"Hey, when you visit mum, ask her to give you her gardening journal. I need it," Naylan said, making me snort chuckle.

As I came to know my brother more every day, I've come to the realization that he is indeed a momma's boy.

The alpha aura and the wide shoulders didn't stop that boyish posture from taking over him every time he talked about mum.

She seemed wonderful from the way he spoke about her.

I hoped I felt the same way when I got to see her for myself.

My eyes went wide when I felt a hand pat my back.

I looked to my side to find my brother now massaging my shoulder.

"I'm heading downstairs," he said, letting go of me before making his way out of the room too.

I stared on, not wanting to head downstairs yet and instead, I wandered over to one of the windows to look outside at the city.

Sure, the light pollution made looking at the stars almost impossible but the moon was out there, although dim and I smiled, wondering if werewolves howled at the moon like most movies said they did.

My smile became a bit faint as the weight of how much I had been through in a few months weighed on my shoulders.

My life would never be the same way again and to be quite honest, I was perfectly fine with that.

I smiled again, leaning off the window as I reminded myself to call Len and tell him I was alright before heading home.

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princesswithabraidedcrown · 3 years

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Oh look, not two minutes after I went back to The Wolf, Main Dude said a simple sentence. I am aware that my ability to suspend my disbelief about people flying on swords and be raised by wolves but not a dude learning his first language after he’s basically an adult is weird.

Just keep with it. You are only like 15-17 minutes into the first episode.

#the blogger watches #the wolf #language acquisition #main dude that was raised by wolves #but if this dude is gonna defy human development lets make sure he ends up at eloquent okay?#although simple sentences are pretty much the only thing I can understand at the moment

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xaibaugrove · 3 years

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Everyone in the Krew is Problematic

I was inspired to go on this rant by someone who recently brought up a question in a server I’m in, asking why so many people in the fandom seem to hate Mako and Makorra and why. This wouldn’t be the first time I defend Mako and it most likely won’t be the last, but it might be the first time I tear him and everyone else in the Krew down in the process, only to bring them back up. Hear me out though.

I think I’ve totally accepted that a lot of people in this fandom will always hate Mako and that I will have to perpetually defend him, I understand that this is the relationship I’ve chosen with this world. But what I still will never understand are the reasons why people hate/dislike him because compared to how much they love other characters in the Krew who honestly aren’t that much better than him (in some cases, even worse!), it doesn’t make any sense.

Let me also preface this by saying, I love these characters with all my heart and soul, probably more than I should love fictional characters, but this is the life I live and with that being said, I am going to tear them apart just to prove a point. Okay, here we go.

MAKO

Most of his detractors list the usual criticisms, which are valid when isolated. He cheated on Asami, he lied to Korra, he was a terrible boyfriend and essentially he treated the women he claimed to love or care about horribly. Gee, it’s almost like the man was a teenager with no experience in having long-lasting, healthy relationships and was raised in the streets by gangmembers while doing anything to survive and provide for his younger sibling after seeing his parents killed right in front of him and suddenly being orphaned…

I think Mako has been torn down enough, so I won’t get too deep into the tearing down part for him. It really does baffle me how someone can claim to be woke and not comprehend how someone coming from poverty could possibly be a product of their environment. Like, does everyone think that poor people automatically have hearts of gold and turn out like Little Orphan Annie? Why are people surprised that when someone has a shitty life, they might do shitty things?

Also, sooo many people love Zuko, who actively tried to cause harm to Aang, Katara and Sokka numerous times, and sympathize with his troubled past. But like, sure Zuko had an abusive father and his mother peaced out of his life for whatever reasons but at least he had his uncle. Mako had his parents for maybe 8 years before they were murdered in front of him and then had...no one for the next 10 years? Except for Bolin, sure, but no other parental figure in his life. Dude literally had to become him and his brother’s own parent and joined a gang to survive, and after all that, the worst he does is acts as a bad boyfriend toward Korra and Asami and he is instantly thrown to the wolves. Something doesn’t add up. It’s just...I don’t get it.

Yes, the way he treated people was bad, but people can grow? That’s a thing humans can do. And he was a teenager, my god. No, we cannot allow our past to be an excuse for how we treat others, but we have to be aware that there is a growth process to being human. And being human in and of itself, isn’t pretty. You think Mako is problematic? Don’t get me started on your fave.

KORRA

Ok, I love this woman to death but she is ridiculously problematic. She pursued someone in a relationship and essentially forced Mako to cheat on Asami by kissing him against his will, that’s already pretty awful and shows a lack of empathy on her part, also kissing people without their consent is no bueno. But also I just have to say it for the people who might not know this. One of the fundamental reasons why Makorra didn’t work was because KORRA WAS ABUSIVE. Okay? It wasn’t just that Mako was inadequate at relationships and didn’t know how to people, it wasn’t that she was secretly confused and wanting Asami the entire time (biphobia at it’s best) one of the main problems in the pairing was that Korra was crazy abusive towards Mako. Seriously, why don’t I see this more often in those discussions??

If we need examples, I have dozens. Honestly, it’s really easy to see how terrible Korra was to Mako, I’d actually argue that she treated him worse than he treated her. I mean, they were both terrible to one another, but in Korra’s case she went through the motions of being completely infatuated with your first teenage crush, getting with said crush, then crashing and burning once you realize that you have no idea how to treat a romantic partner so after the butterflies wear off you subject them to all the wonderful aspects of your anger issues. Not only did she scream at Mako during every argument they had, she also threatened him with bodily harm if she got really angry. Remember how their relationship crashed and burned in Book 2? Here are the things that Korra did during that time. Let me reiterate, this was not okay.

Mako is visibly shaken by this!

This woman burst into her boyfriend’s place of work and violently kicked his desk out from in front of him with all his coworkers present. That is not normal behavior. That is a red flag. And after she came back, had amnesia or whatever and forgot they broke up after that scene, let’s not forget that Mako was legitimately Afraid to break up with her again. Korra made her partner frightened that they might suffer bodily harm if they upset her. Again, and I can’t stress this enough, this is not okay!

The little scene in Book 3 when Korra is lifting Mako like 100 feet off the ground with airbending while he’s screaming in fear just to make Asami laugh is cute, right? I’ll admit, I loved that little moment too, it’s one of the only instances of Korrasami development that we got, but also, there were sooo many things wrong with that scene lol. Not only does Korra terrify Mako for literally no reason, it’s also sort of just her continuing to exercise some degree of power over him for her own amusement. Almost like a subtle reminder to him saying, “I am stronger than you in every way and I can break your femur like a twig if I wanted to… but I won’t, so look how much fun we’re having!”

Now of course, there are reasons why Korra acts like this. She was isolated for almost her entire life and never learned how to treat people and be around people. The Avatar is human because they must live amongst the people they protect and that helps them develop empathy and cherish life. The White Lotus deprived her of that fundamental aspect of her duty as the Avatar and it showed throughout the beginning of the series. Clearly, she was young, didn’t see how her actions could negatively affect others and hurt the feelings of not just her partner but also friends and family (she was really awful towards a lot of people in her life!). But as the series went on, we see her having less outbursts and learning to control her temper more.

One can only assume that she does not have the same behavior with Asami because for one, I don’t think Asami would play that shit, she seems like she would electrocute a bitch in a heartbeat and not hesitate if needed, but also Korra is not the same shitty partner she used to be as a teenager. Again, kids do stupid things. Adults do stupid things. And we learn and we grow. Korra will probably make some more mistakes in her relationship with Asami. I don't think anyone can have one bad relationship and suddenly learn all the lessons they can from it and have a perfect one the next go around. I can totally picture Korra losing her temper and raising her voice at Asami if she gets frustrated and forgets who she’s dealing with. Managing anger issues is hard, I know this from experience, and it doesn’t magically get easier. Of course, if Korra does pop off, Asami would definitely put her in her place because she’s a bad bitch who doesn’t take anyone’s shit, next character.

ASAMI

You know her, you love her, you fantasize about her and you probably have her on your list of fictional characters you would totally bang if you had the chance (I know I do), yes, even your best girl is problematic. It’s interesting to me that a lot of people sympathize with Asami and very few openly criticize her (so few that I’ve never seen anyone say a bad thing about her). What’s there to criticize though? The poor girl was cheated on by Mako, had her feelings disregarded by Korra, who claimed to be her friend but pursued her then-boyfriend behind her back and then made up for it by simping for her for the rest of her life? Also her mom was murdered when she was just 6 years old, her father threatened to kill her once and physically abused her, then died right after they started repairing their relationship, essentially making her an orphan at the ripe age of 22. Suffice it to say, Asami has been through it.

So, how could she be problematic, you ask? Why, of course, through the classic Bryke technique of romance progression in storylines called Kissing People Without Their Consent

To be honest, I did gloss over this with Korra, simply because there were sooo many other issues with that woman and I just couldn’t go through every single one in as much detail but that doesn’t negate how serious this whole sneak attack kissing thing is. Sure, Asami is very emotional and lonely and sort of desperate too, (it's a little sad, really) but Mako is clearly uncomfortable and completely caught off guard by the kiss. This is also the second time this happens to him in the series! There are a couple factors that might contribute to why Asami does this and acts this way, maybe Korra’s general awfulness rubbed off on her (don’t make a dirty joke) but this is still wrong.

AND that’s...pretty much it. Kissing people without their permission is a big no no, though. Not wanting to gloss over that, but Asami really is a good person who just did a not-so-great thing. Getting burned by Mako twice probably made her a little less inclined to be as forward with anyone though, and it looks like she now takes her time and is patient in her relationship with Korra. It even seems like Asami is the only person Korra is afraid to upset, as Korra does seem more gentle and calm when around her. And who knows? Maybe Asami living a life where a majority of the time she got whatever she wanted when she wanted it might have also influenced her to be more assertive or even imposing within her relationships.

If anything, those three fools getting into relationships with each other just showed how not ready they were to be in relationships in the first place and also how not okay they were.

BOLIN

Originally I titled this as “Everyone in the Krew is problematic (except Bolin)” but then I remembered that Bolin totally kissed a woman without her consent so I deleted the shit out of that!

This asshole looks genuinely pleased with himself after essentially assaulting Ginger. Not a good look.

Sure, Bolin is baby. He will always be baby to me. But that does not erase the fact that he also actively supported a fascist dictator. Not only was the kissing without consent thing bad, but there’s also that. No matter how many times people around him warned him about the fact that he was on the wrong side of things, that he was helping someone who was putting people into concentration camps...Bolin wanted to believe the best of Kuvira. He ignored obvious signs that the woman was a dictator committing human rights violations like crazy and you know, there’s gotta be a reason for that too.

Maybe Bolin wanted to feel like he was doing something good for once. When you think about it, with his role as the comic relief in the Krew, and sort of constantly being infantilized by his older brother, I wouldn’t be surprised if the man developed some insecurity in his ability to do anything good or useful for anyone without screwing it up in some way. In Kuvira’s army, it seemed like he was actually taken seriously, he felt like he was doing something that mattered. Korra had being the Avatar, Asami had her business and mindblowing philanthropy (honestly, her ability to be as charitable as she is profitable is insane) and Mako had his police work (ACAB, tho). Bolin had...the role of being a joke. A superficial actor. A former pro-bending meathead.

Bolin lived his entire life following after his brother that once they were adults and Mako finally decided to live his own life for once, it left Bolin completely lost. And lost young men are perfect recruits for fascists.

So, in conclusion, my whole reasoning behind destroying the integrity of my favorite characters is to prove a huge point. All of these characters are problematic. They have flaws, some bigger than others (looking at you, Korra. Just...wow), but ultimately, even if your fave is problematic... that’s okay. A lot of people, mostly younger people it seems, are really obsessed with being right about everything that they do and stan. And that’s a wonderful thing, so much change has come about by the younger generations calling out people who do fucked up shit, don’t want or try to improve, and get away with it. But it’s also caused a lot of people to be unforgiving and completely unwilling to acknowledge when people do improve and try to be better.

Personally, I love my problematic Krew because having issues that you’re constantly working on internally is human. It’s human to make mistakes, it’s human to grow from those mistakes. And it’s inspiring to me, who is wholly imperfect, to see myself reflected in fictional characters who aren’t perpetuating unrealistic ideals of human nature, characters who are messy, crazy and ultimately human.

As one of my favorite manga artists and queen of impeccable character creation Rumiko Takahashi once said:

“I think that perfect people are not very interesting.”

And I will always wholeheartedly agree.

#long post #rant #tlok #the legend of korra #korra #asami sato #mako #bolin #avatar: the legend of korra #back on my random bullshit i guess

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intergalactic-garbage · 3 years

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things i would’ve loved to see in hoo:

- trans dude frank

- more homoerotic interactions between reyna and annabeth (think about it - both children of the war goddesses of their respective pantheons, their wits the sharpest of their camps; then cj is attacked by possesed leo and reyna thinks annabeth, whom she trusted and came to care for in those few moments they shared, betrayed her)

- jason “raised by wolves” grace - dude straight up lived with lupa’s pack for YEARS and got raised by them during his formative years (when going on how normal human memories, he wouldn’t have even remembered his mother - his earliest memories would have been of lupa), and yet we never see him tearing at a steak with his face? he’s never tapping his foot, wanting to scratch an itch with it? this would’ve been perfectly in line with riordan’s humor, he missed an opportunity

- rachel elizabeth dare and grover playing an actual role in the plot, not just being seen in that one scene in hoh. the different povs in chapers should’ve been played around with more - give us a pov of someone from the camps, or rachel/grover - the seven were only one part of the many moving elements in the plot and the dream sequences hardly made up for it

- romance being either tied directly into the plot like in pjo or eliminated completely; not seen as a plot device (eg. reyna considering getting involved with octavian when confronted with the possibility of him becoming praetor)

- a villain who’s more than literally just “ehehe i am earth. am bad. want to kill you. no i don’t have a particular reason”. pjo had luke which was so good because he spent the first book establishing how nice he is, how he’s an older brother to everyone at camp, how eager he’s to show you the ropes and young me knew he was going to turn but i had such a hard time believing it. the rest of the books don’t make things any easier because luke is plotting this horrible thing, but is it really horrible? until today people are fighting about whether he was right or not. and they have to stop him but he used to be their friend. they used to care about each other so much and that care doesn’t just go away when he betrays them. so they’re faced with one impossible choice and they know what they have to do but can they? anyways hoo wishes it was half as complex as pjo

- the leo/sammy doppleganger situation should have been expanded upon more beyond the exuse for the leo/hazel/frank love triangle. no i don’t know how. but it just makes it look like rick put it in there for funsies and never did anything with it. my mind keeps going back to a time travel plot but i know this is the riordanverse and We Don’t Do That Here

- octavian being more than “i created this character so fans could have someone to hate”

- the author not feeling so needed to write a blockbuster epic story like the avengers or whatever was in cinemas at that time. it was supposed to be a continuation of pjo, but instead of expanding upon the characters we had met in it, we barely saw any of them, they were forgotten, only the few main were placed in the spotlight, along with a bunch of new characters we’d never seen before. the focus was on the seven and a few other characters

- “the gods decided to not interact with mortals” was a stupid decision, especially considering the ending of tlo. percy asked the gods to be more present in their children’s lives, they, albeit reluctantly, accepted. and the next time we see them they remove themselves from their lives. the central conflict of the previous series had arised because nobody knew of the gods, what they were up to. there was no lexicon of rules, they just had to wait; and they grew tired of it. the gods should have been visiting them, awkwardly integrating themselves in their lives, not the exact opposite. not setting up for another demigod uprising

- i know this is just wishful thinking but. there should’ve been more of the riordanverse. yes i know there were already a bajilion other plot lines and we had the romans introduced but. i would’ve been fine with even just a little nod. or a character from a different pantheon appearing. this is all in the same universe as the huge chaos snake and the other, world snake and i just think it should’ve been expanded upon more

- frank’s firewood should have had. a role. you set up your character to be “the most powerful” of the seven, all extremely powerful protagonists, and then decide to ignore him for the last book and a half?

- by far one of the things that irritated me the most was how everyone survived. this was supposed to be a sequel series to a children’s series that had one of the main characters stab himself after realizing that this was the right thing to do. a daughter of the goddess of beauty got acid spit in her face. tlo is my favourite of the pjo books because it’s the climax, and it lays it down as it is - not as some heroic fight scene of good vs. evil, but people, being people. making choices for the ones they love and making mistakes because they don’t know what’s right. in boo, there’s an attempt at this “great last battle”, but if anything, this was undermined by the fact that nobody died. (i did like how leo coming back was framed, even if i’m not a terrible fan of caleo, nico feeling leo’s spirit alive, leo having a “surprise” chapter at the end.. goosebumps man) (though i suppose jason could’ve died right there and there. “to storm or fire” and everything)

- more hazel/nico getting confused by modern technology - i just think it would’ve been funny to see hazel hear about some event that happened between the 30s and present day and be like “you said what-” it’s good humor and also characterbuilding

- however, if we’re so horribly set on having romantic relationships, valdangelo is right there. nico can’t face his queerness. leo understands machines better than people. they both carry an immense sadness within, but it made them totally different people. and the dynamic? everything you could’ve wanted

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thatcharmingjerk · 2 years

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Top 5 fictional animal characters :3c

Oh this was HARD!!!! And even I obsessed over this for few hours I still feel like I’m forgetting someone actually important but !!!!! Let’s try!!!!!!!

Ok first one is character that I do not like at all, I dont think I even sympathize with him but I think he’s fantastically written and I feel like I understand the point and motives of this bitch but I know some of yall will cringe at me for picking him but still! my first pick is:

-Walter White. I think he’s just so good depiction of how dangerous it can be when you have unresolved issues and you’re in a tight spot, like the cunt started as good ™ man who worked hard and did his best to provide for his family, but the cancer and the bitterness most people seem to overlook made him to spiral into such monster..!

I just seriously think that he’s so good example what might happen when someone who has mental baggage and toxic and unprocessed bitterness is pushed too far

......Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaand I only now noticed the animal part of the ask asdfghjhkg anyway my other picks for top 5 characters would’ve been Edward Elric, Dean Winchester, Ragnar Lodbrok and Nuuskamuikkunen (aka Snufkin) who I also thought to write little essays of!!!

But!!!!!!!! Animals!!!!!! Ok ok ok lets seeeeeeee

(I had to get my thoughts out of my system so dude rambling is under cut too!!)

1. Moro from Mononoke Hime, the wolf mother, I just love her she’s fierce and dangerous but also nurturing and kind enough to raise a human among her pups, I think Moro is just one of the good wolves in media, like good as in pretty correct, not a pet but also not a mindless killing machine either!!

2. Black Beauty, the main character from the movie with same name, idk he just is so horse, he just keeps being kind and nice and working even after all the shit he has to put up with because he trusts that some people are good too. Yes that movie makes me cry, yes I’m emotional of horses!!!!!

3. Scar from Lion King, he’s queer coded!!! He’s got this greasy style!!! His moral compass is set on whatever!!! He just lies and cheats and don’t give a shit of anyone! Gotta love a good villain!

4. Akame from Hopeanuoli/Ginga, idk he’s got style, plus also gotta love a bitch who decides just not to give a shit of old tradition he notices are just empty, like ‘’hey I just now noticed there’s actual problems in world and us guarding some old scrolls ain’t one, bye boys i’mma burn this place!’’

Ok last one shall beeeee...!

5. Balto!!! As a weirdo myself the whole conflict of not feeling like belonging with either dogs nor wolves, might I say, mood.

Really tho I think Balto is one of the rare cases where main character dude being an underdog (hehe) don’t come with the scott pilgrim -syndrome so thats neat,

and I just really liked and i still like to see an outsider find self worth in their true self and, AND!! becoming cherished part of community!!!

So there we go!! Did I overthink this? Absolutely!!! Did I ramble too much? Mayhaps!!! But yeah, here we goooo! And yes theres what I originally thought for this ask before properly reading it under the cut!!! XD

Thank u for the ask anyhoo <3

Yes!!!!! My semi-planned rambling of my boys went here before I could think if best animals!!! so yeah!!! walter is a cunt but the rest of these choices i actually do love so!

Edward Elric, a bastard!!! I love that in any character!!! He’s just so well written too, like he’s the big brother, he has responsibilty, he knows he needs to do stuff no one else can, he’s smart but in believable way so it doesn’t feel too god-like etc, the trauma!!! the tenacity!!! and at the end of the day behind all of he’s just a teenage who lost almost everything and just..... *clenches fist* yeah......

Dean Winchester, yes another big brother but this dude is whole different story, yes he had to look after himself and his little brother but there was also terrifying father figure present to beat him up (mentally, possibly physically too?) for any mistake like its telling he gives Dean shit about car maintenance even when he’s over twenty so....... and yes big part of Dean character isn’t probably what writers intended but I don’t care, i just like what i see in him and his macho-mask and what else!!!

Ragnar Lodbrok, yes also a historical figure but we’re talking about the dude from vikings show obviously!! I just LOVE how he’s a very manly man and etc blah blah but also soft..! He’s a family man!! he loves his wife!!! plays with his kids!!! he’s a leader sure but his real interest isn’t power or gold he just wants better life for his family and people!!! He loves good soil over gold!!!! but he’s also not a perfect ™, he has his weaknesses and his morals can be interesting to say at least, I just adore his vibe and the self confidence!!!!!

and then, Nuuskamuikkunen, he’s perfect being, this bitch has it all figured out, acab, fuck the stupid rules and just yes!!! if I didn’t love my trinkets and place for creating art so much I would absolutely live in a tent too, or at least with life that fits in single backpack!!!

#replies #ask box thing #so this is a messy reply but!!!! oh well!!

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a-cat-in-a-funky-hat · 3 years

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okay trans mcr musical idea

I don't have a plot but I want the main piece to be mama with the protagonist (a trans dude) going feral during the "you should have raised a baby girl, I should have been a better son" part AND the gay prison sex song needs to be in it with the protagonist making out with a hot dude and OF COURSE house of wolves needs to he in it and the "TELL ME IM A BAD MAN, KICK ME LIKE A STRAY" part is gonna be WILD, as well as the "TELL ME IM A BAD BAD BAD BAD MAN, TELL ME IM A BAF BAD BAD BAD MEN!"

thanks for your attention, pls someone hire me

#midnight rambles #mcr #my chemical romance

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wygolvillage · 3 years

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i miss when i was in fourth grade and i would write very weird original fiction that was extremely specific to my interests, usually involving wolves and, in retrospect, kinda gay vibes

FOR EXAMPLE. i wrote a short story about being pen pals with a werewolf girl and the two main characters were very close and Best Friends™, i constantly described the werewolf as extremely beautiful, and eventually the werewolf turned the human girl into a werewolf as well and they moved in together LMAO.... extremely funny in retrospect that one of the characters was named laura. kind of a gay name dont you think....

other notable works include:

-a story about a family moving into a massive house that changed shape and added rooms to appeal to potential home owners and then, with the aid of a monster in the basement, sap away at your memories over time. the house was bigger on the inside and one of the rooms was a forest that changed colors like a windows movie maker effect. the monster in the basement was defeated with the help of a talking wolf and the power of gal pals friendship. (this one was based on a dream i had which was kinda freaky)

-a story about a wolf who could turn into a fairy with a plot that was a blatant metaphor for how much i disliked physical education. the evil wolf who was trying to raise child soldiers(?) was literally named coach and was making them do excercises.

the last one has a funny story, some kids from another class came over to peer review our writing and someone wrote "MAGIC ISNT PROBABLE" next to the scene where maple (the fairy wolf) made all the trees grow and restored the magic forest. like dude this is magic wolf fiction (which should be its own genre) get with the program

#personal so dont rb lmao #but i thought yall may find it funny

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tszombieau · 3 years

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Part 24

While it took a while, eventually the group calmed down enough from their reuniting to all settle into the cabin's main room and talk.

"I still can't believe this is happening!" Roman was practically shaking with excitement, not once taking his eyes off of Remus or Virgil. "It's crazy, you guys are alive! I mean, I figured Remus would survive but I thought that the odds of us meeting were basically none and Virgil was dead and we wouldn't-"

"Dude, breathe," Virgil reminded, interrupting his babbling with a hint of a smile on his lips. Roman stopped to breathe, but his huge smile never left his face.

"But we're all back together again!" Patton said, sitting on the couch besides Logan, "See? The apocalypse isn't all that bad; miracles still happen!"

"I wouldn't exactly say this makes the apocalypse 'not all that bad'," Janus mumbled, but glanced towards his two fellow Others with a soft smile present on his lips. "But I'm glad you all found each other."

"Yeah!" Remus exclaimed, throwing his arms over Roman's and Janus' shoulders. While everyone was certainly ecstatic at how well this trip had gone (besides the minor injuries Janus had given half the group, but they had ice bags on their bruises so they were probably okay), Remus was showing it the most. Everyone was surprised he'd stopped jumping up and down after only five minutes. "And now everything is good and we'll be fine!!"

The room settled into a short, yet comfortable, silence. Everyone could feel the excitement of reuniting. Even Remy and Janus, who didn't completely understand what was going on, could feel the pure joy radiating in the very air they breathed. It was the happiest anyone had been in a long time.

Logan was the one to break the silence, surprisingly enough. He cleared his throat.

"So what happened?" He asked, looking back and forth between Virgil, Remus, and Janus. "Virgil, we saw you got bit. I'm assuming the rumors of the Vigilante being immune to zombies are true then, right?"

"I-" Virgil rubbed the back of his neck, immediately looking uncomfortable. Logan curiously noted the concerned glances Remus and Janus sent each other.

"Yeah, they're true, I guess. The bite didn't kill me." He gestured to his left leg, "I still have a scar from the bite, but it didn't kill me."

"And the zombies ignore him too!" Remus exclaimed, a manic grin on his face, "Seriously. He's ran into an entire hoard before and started chopping their heads clean off, and the monsters just ignore him! How cool is that?!"

"Woah," Remy nodded in approval, "That's sick."

"But what happened?" Logan asked again, "After you got bit, I mean. How did you get out? When did they stop going after you?"

"And we heard..." Patton hesitated, the unspoken word 'gunshot' left unsaid, but understood by all who had been there. Everyone knew what the Wolves had presumed had happened.

The memories came back to Virgil as soon as he said it, and he frowned.

"Well... I was going to do what you thought I did, since you know..." He gestured absently, "I got bit and all, but I didn't, for some reason. At the last second I just changed my aim and shot the zombie in front of me and ran into a supply closet and locked the door."

"Even though you thought you were gonna turn into a zombie?" Roman asked. Virgil shrugged.

"Yeah. Had a few panic attacks in there, reconsidered my entire life, prayed to every god I'd ever heard of, hyperventilated, the usual 'oh shit I'm dying' experience." He chuckled, "And I stayed in there for... I don't know how long. It had to have been at least a couple days, but I didn't have a clock on me. I got pretty sick too with the normal zombie-bite-death symptoms. I was sweating nonstop, my head was killing me, I would've been puking if I had anything in my stomach... I passed out after a while, figured that was the last time I'd be conscious ever."

"But then I woke up again, and my fever was gone and I felt fine." He fiddled with his fingers anxiously, "I had no idea why I was alive or if I was hallucinating or what, but I was hungry and thirsty and tired of the stuffy closet. I hadn't died, but if I stayed in there much longer I would anyways. I could still hear the zombies outside the door though... Figured I had to make a run for it."

"But they didn't attack you, did they?" Remy cut in. Virgil nodded.

"They ignored me!" He said, "I had no idea what was going on, and for a minute I was convinced I was imagining everything and I was still dying in that supply closet and this was my brain playing one last messed up prank on me. I passed by five zombies without a single reaction from any of them. I got outside, and there were a dozen out there who ignored me too."

"Fascinating." Logan's eyes were wide with interest, and if Virgil hadn't already known him, he would've been terrified of that look. "Not only are you immune to their bites, but it must of had the side effect of making the zombies think you're one of them. Have they ever reacted to you?"

Virgil shook his head, crossing his arms over his chest. "No, never. At one point that day I ran up to one and just yelled in their face, punched them, and shoved my arm in front of their mouth. Nothing. I'm completely invisible to them, I guess."

"Wait," Patton interrupted, "You did that on that day?! When you didn't know for sure that you were immune yet?!"

"Yeah, he's crazy ain't he?" Remus grinned. Virgil elbowed him harshly in the side, ignoring his exaggerated cry of pain.

"Says you! The week you found out, you shoved me in a pit of them for laughs!"

"Yeah, but I made sure you were fine first! And it was funny!"

Logan patted Patton on the back comfortingly, who was looking absolutely horrified at this conversation. Logan paused, thinking, and then added in another question.

"Have you experienced any other side effects?"

Virgil froze, but Janus answered before he could.

"No. And we're thankful for that," Janus said, "It's kept us safe and we would've been long dead if it weren't for his ability."

"It seems pretty useful," Remy agreed, "You should come help the Ghosts out sometime. We'd gladly pay you guys in medical supplies and even some weapons if you helped us clear out the city. We're trying to take it back block by block, but you can easily see why that's taking a while... We don't have as many soldiers as we'd like, and none of the ones we do have have an ability like you do."

Virgil nodded, "Yeah, I'll think about it," He agreed. "We can work out some more details later, but it's not like I have much else to do."

"Yeah you do!" Roman interrupted, moving to stand in the middle of the room where everyone could see him. He stood tall as he made his announcement, meeting the eyes of everyone in the room before he spoke a single word. This announcement was important, so he was going to be as dramatic as possible with it. How else was he supposed to make sure everyone would hear?

Virgil raised one brow in question. "I'll be busy doing what, exactly?"

"Moving to our island, of course." Roman said confidently, "Both of you- and your friend too, I guess. We have room for all three of you!"

Roman was expecting a celebration of safety and a chance to rebuilt, a parade of "thank you"s and a hug. He was not expecting the looks of horror, doubt, and rejection on the three's faces at all. He faltered.

"You guys are coming back with us..." He said, slower this time, "Right?"

First Part. Previous / Next

#ts immune au #sanders sides au #ts immune au updates #sanders sides #sanders sides askblog #tw suicide mention #vague but #just in case

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goldlighter · 3 years

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anyone who thinks chris would willingly let the bsaa experiment and use rose after ethan puts her into his care really doesn’t know anything about him. he has never approved of that kind of thing and actively fought against it, and his faith is so shaken in the bsaa after years of being used and abused by the organisation he helped create ( re6, anyone? ) that he’s literally gone rogue because he cannot stand how the bsaa has handled the baker incident - that’s the whole reason he’s operating outside of them in village! nevermind that even in his prime, when the bsaa had finally become a proper thing with funding and jurisdictions and international operation as opposed to a small group, he abandoned and went against orders in kijuju to pursue what he thought was right - and that was getting proof that jill was alive and rescuing her, along with stopping wesker - when the bsaa wanted him to do nothing more than arrest irving and then give up when josh’s team was killed. chris has always been terrible at following the rules because he’s reckless and headstrong but most importantly, he is full of love. he thinks with his heart, not his head. even in re6, at his worst, thrown to the wolves by the bsaa despite the fact he’s got brain damage and is utterly traumatised, yes he chases after carla and abandons the mission but ultimately it’s out of love for the men he lost and the people he was supposed to protect and in the end, he puts that aside to rescue jake and sherry. hell the last cutscene of village ( not including the post-credits cutscene ) is him demanding answers from the bsaa and saying they have to pay for the damage they’ve caused, and realising that the organisation he helped create has become the thing they’re trying to stop ( and if it isn’t just laziness in the reuse of chris’ model, they’re using his body to do it ). you think he’d be like ‘no thats fine anyway here’s a superpowered baby have fun with her :)’.

we don’t even know for certain that it’s the bsaa in that end cutscene, it’s only assumed, because as far as i remember there’s no bsaa identifying marks - only men in suits, which speaks more to possibly government or dso than the bsaa who are all soldiers ( even the director, when we see o’brian, isn’t in a suit ). but the idea he would willingly let a little girl be used is simply absurd. i know out of the main four protags chris is the last favourite, and people just see him as meathead tough action dude ignoring how this man literally was going to let billions of people die at wesker’s hands so he could stay with his best friend because he loves her ( romantically or not ) and has repeatedly put himself in danger to protect people ( even as tyler holds a gun to his head, he still tries to reason with him. he attempts to do the same with mary. he puts rebecca’s life as his priority when it comes to arias, instead of the virus and the civilians being infected. he, ultimately, listens to leon even though leon is dismissive of the trauma he’s endured and the suffering “ada” has caused to millions of people because leon asks him to. the man has the date of the arklay incident on his gun in village because he’s still under the impression he owes it to his murdered stars member to do what’s right and prevent these things from ever happening again). chris, just like claire, is a character who loves and and as much as claire is the mother figure, chris is the father figure and i don’t doubt he would do everything in his power to uphold his promise to ethan and raise rose and keep her safe. whatever the situation, whether it’s something rose chose to do for whatever reason, or it was completely out of his hands, or whether he thinks it’ll be the safest option, if she was being used or experimented on he wouldn’t stand by and allow it - especially not after everything jill has been through ( even if capcom won’t update us on her ).

#i will NOT stand for this slander!!!#i know a lot of new fans know nothing about chris other than him in 7/8 which is....there's a lot of issues with his portrayal in that #8 is better but still a mess but ultimately you wanna see peak chris it's re5/rev/the stage imo #► 𝐎𝐔𝐓 𝐎𝐅 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐑: text.

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chicagocityofclans · 3 years

Photo

Isaac Baker → Daniel Kaluyaa → Wolf

→ Basic Information

Age: 66

Gender: Male

Sexuality: Straight

Born or Made: Made

Birthday: March 22

Zodiac Sign: Aries

Religion: Agnostic

→ His Personality Isaac was never the biggest or strongest in life. He grew up as the nerd who got pushed around and shoved into lockers. He was smart and cocky but didn’t have the skills to back up all the shit he talked. Until he was turned into a werewolf, and the natural personality that lived inside him came out in an obnoxious amount. Though Isaac has matured with his years as Alpha, he is still an impulsive showoff. He likes being the center of attention and making people laugh and have a good time. He can be confrontational and aggressive when dealing with situations, generally acting first before thinking of all the emotional consequences, especially with his words. Despite the rambunctious and loud behavior, Isaac is very genuinely a good person. He cares about his pack and everyone who he considers his. He is confident and lively, being incredibly welcoming and open to new pack members and other species. And though he can act impulsively and without thought, he has learned to recognize larger situations and has become versatile in the way he handles official pack business.

People often forget just how smart Isaac is, which he uses to his advantage. He is able to size a person or situation and up and manipulate it to his advantage. In the constant fights he faced as a young, incoming alpha he learned to find the weaknesses in the wolf shifter and attack those first, often knocking his opponent out before they could get many blows in. His foresight is not limited to fights, he could see all the advantages in bringing Duke into his pack and leapt at the opportunity.

→ His Personal Facts

Occupation: Full time Alpha

Scars: None

Tattoos: None

Two Likes: Smart Technology and Salt and Vinegar chips

Two Dislikes: Football and Curacao

Two Fears: Flying and Losing control of his body

Two Hobbies: Playing Video Games and Coding

Three Positive Traits: Lively, Versatile, Good Hearted

Three Negative Traits: Confrontational, Show Off, Impulsive

→ His Connections Parent Names:

Sandra Baker (Mother): Sandra was always incredibly supportive with Isaac as a child. She tried her best to make his young, friendless life fun with family movie nights and vacations. She is very disappointed that Isaac dropped out, and wishes he’d come home to get back on the academic track.

Edward Baker (Father): Edward taught Isaac everything he knew about boxing and coding. He always had Isaac’s back and would let him get out and fail every once in a while, unlike his mother. Edward has always asked about the real reason Isaac left school. He knew how much MIT meant to him and how he’d never just give it up.

Sibling Names:

None.

Children Names:

None

Romantic Connections:

Simone Campbell (Ex-Girlfriend): Isaac was a goner for Simone. She stood up to him and often gave him perspective on his life. When Simone started hanging out with a hyena, it raised an alarm in Isaac and he tried to get her to stop seeing her, she dumped him. He still wants her back.

Platonic Connections:

Duke Thornton (Good Friends): Isaac and Duke have had a lot of time to get to know each other in the last decade. He is the closest person to Isaac in the pack, and would gladly have him as a second or third if he had any understanding of dominance levels.

Peter Knox (Friends): Isaac is very glad to have Peter as his second. They both had to fight their way through to their positions and he knows Peter has his back. He hangs out with him and his mate regularly at ANON and he was the one who introduced Isaac to Simone.

Leah Philips (Friend): He and Leah became quick friends when he first moved into Chicago, but she had a rough time transitioning from Ogden to Isaac. They’re almost back to where they used to be, though it has taken work.

Selene Andris (Pack mate): Selene has been a big help with all the new wolves coming to Chicago. He’s grateful she likes playing host and helping others feel more comfortable in the pack.

Ronan Cleirigh (Ally): He and Ronan made a deal to save Duke’s life. He offered him training and a pack while in return Ronan offered his voting power in council meetings. Isaac respects what the Cleirighs, and Ronan in particular, were trying to do for Duke.

Kaylor Cleirigh (Friendly Fear): Kaylor came to him personally after he offered to help Duke to lay down her “concerns”. Isaac wasn’t going to do anything on the list before, but he sure as hell wouldn’t do it after speaking with the scariest Cleirigh.

Judson Cleirigh (Chill): Judson comes in with his friends to drink at ANON. He is easily the most laid back of Duke’s family, though he doesn’t entirely trust him.

Nick Hamelin (Okay): He’s not friends with Nick, per say, but he’s ok with him. He thinks he can fit right into the Prisses at times, but he has more self-awareness than to sink that low.

Micah Toll (Friendly Acquaintance): Micah is alright for a rat. He respects the rules that Isaac put down, and only starts something in retaliation.

Ellis Watts (Council Meeting Buddy): Though he is apparently supposed to hate the jackals for reasons… Isaac immediately clicked with Ellis. He repaired a lot of the riffs between their two packs and they’ve started going to watch sports games together.

Hostile Connections:

Alan Thomas (Hates): Alan Thomas was one of the first people Isaac wiped the floor with and he’s gone out of his way to be the biggest asshole to Isaac. He’s glad he was kicked out as third.

James Shaw (Hates): James Shaw is both crazy and racist. He’ll talk endlessly about his family and how long they’ve been in the city and why his boys should be Alpha. Before Isaac wrote it off as an angry white dude, but there is something changing in James’s eyes and Isaac isn’t sure it is entirely healthy.

Clara Fields (Priss 1): Clara Fields loves nothing more than to hear herself talk. She somehow always speaks up at every single meeting, and Isaac prays for the day she gets magical laryngitis.

Chris Bialar (Priss 2): Chris Bialar has got his nose in the air. There’s always some made up jab that he tries to angle at Isaac. He loves to keep the politics up in the council meeting, and is a main for most of the riffs between alphas.

Percy McCormick (Priss 3): Percy McCormick is barely an alpha. He lets his pack run wild and the rest of the council is left to discipline and rule them. If there is one alpha that Isaac could kick out, it’d be him.

Greer Finley (Dislike): Greer is like Chris’s pet piranha. He thinks she might be more vicious than any of the other big cats in the pack.

Sol Alfaro (Hates): This guy will just not give it up. He’ll never win a fight against Isaac, and is honestly more of a pest than any real threat.

Pets:

None

→ History Isaac was raised in a small town outside of Ann Arbor. His mother worked as a recruiter for the University of Michigan while his dad worked at Pfizer. They had a good life, and he definitely followed in his parents’ academic footsteps, unfortunately that wasn’t the best for a young Isaac. He was constantly bullied by older kids which lead to fights and mostly injuries for him. His mother debated homeschool, while his dad tried to teach him how to fight back. His dad ended up winning and Isaac took boxing lessons. While he was technically very skilled, he was short and had difficulty packing muscle on which still let the bullies win.

By the time he graduated, he was ready to get the hell out of Ann Arbor, much to his mother’s displeasure. He was offered a full ride to MIT for computer software and gladly took it. He did well for the first year, high grades with honors. His parents were over the moon and became more willing to consider MIT being the best move for Isaac. However, his sophomore year changed everything. Isaac was walking home from the lab one night when he felt eyes on him. He assumed it was someone trying to take his bag; but when he turned around, arm ready for a hit, he was met with fur and painfully sharp teeth.

When he awoke he was in strange sweatpants and in a strange room. A man came in the room a few minutes after Isaac woke up. He explained they were werewolves, and that they needed to boost their numbers for an impending war. Isaac was quickly brought in on how to be a werewolf, including physical and fight training as well as how to control his wolf. But Isaac knew when he was being played and could see the alpha thought he was fodder for the battle. He read the situation and in the middle of the night Isaac ran away. He debated going back to Ann Arbor, but realized that might be the first place his “pack” looked. So he headed straight for Chicago, knowing he could probably get a decent paying IT job with his year at MIT. When he arrived in Chicago he was greeted to a fair deal of hostility. The majority of the pack didn’t want outsiders bringing their trouble into the city, and they specifically didn’t want him, a black loudmouth, interrupting their lives. But Isaac was a fighter and within 6 months he found himself as 2nd to the Chicago pack. There was a lot of grumbling, but Ogden acknowledged his position and gave credence to the claim. He took Isaac under his wing and refined the wild chaos that was a freshly turned wolf and gave him structure and purpose and place to put his energy.

Years later after getting settled in Chicago, Ogden died in a car crash. It was truly an accidental and ironic way for a wolf to die; not from old age, or violence but a mundane accident that went terribly wrong. Isaac had to step up to the plate and take over as alpha. They looked to him in their time of mourning, confusion, and fear and Isaac managed to win some of their trust. However not everyone was pleased with a relatively young and often arrogant alpha. He was challenged frequently, especially by Sol, but beat them all through his ability to read weaknesses. Isaac was never afraid to let them tire themselves out before going for the win. The fighting and challenges began to slow, and eventually things became more even keeled. That was until he began switching up ranks. Peter Knox joined his pack and fought his way to the top, a move that could never have happened had Isaac not thrown his support behind him. Then Geri became third, sufficiently pushing the rest of the “Old Guard” out.

Things had begun to settle down when” the Incident” occured. Animal shifters were unable to change to or from whichever form they were in. People were pissed and looking to the Witch and Warlock councils. While the first two meetings were spent grandstanding by the other alphas and leaders, Isaac was trying to read the faces opposite them, when the true reason for the magic gone bad came out. Deucalion Thornton was cursed to be a wolf shifter and they were trying to change him back. Outrage from both magic users and non magic users alike erupted and calls for banishment and possible death flew around. Nothing was decided and they adjourned for the day. Isaac hung around and stopped the Cleirighs as they exited. He offered Ronan a deal, he’d train Duke, allow him safety within his pack, in exchange for Ronan’s vote in various animal shifter matters. Ronan agreed and they devised a plan. At the next meeting before any other alpha could talk, Isaac stepped up and told them what was happening. It was settled and the rest of the council fell in line. Duke moved into the house, and Isaac nearly had a riot on his hands.

From that day forward he’d made it his mission to set things right in at least the wolf clan. No more of their racist, sexist or homophobic nonsense would be allowed, and every wolf had the right to a challenge. This came in handy when he gave his support to Peter after he’d risen through the ranks. He has kept the pack steady over the last ten years and despite the upset had no challenges to his position. → The Present Isaac is looking to get back onto the dating scene. He was recently dumped by his girlfriend, and while it stung initially, he is worried for her. She’d begun to befriend a couple of hyenas and he’s worried she’ll be attacked in the wave of changes that are happening across the city. Isaac knows her aspirations and is positive she’ll never achieve them if she’s bitten. Despite his worry, Isaac hasn’t mentioned any of the supernatural to her, and is just trying to get back in her good graces to keep her safe.

Murmurs of discontent are rising in the pack, and Isaac is positive it is due to Sol. He is losing his patience with the old wolf and the next time he challenges Isaac, he won’t let it go. Isaac knows he’s the one pushing the wolves towards greatness and it’s annoying that no one else seems to see it.

#Isaac Baker #Taken #daniel kaluuya #isaac owens

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