#malec meta

[carelessflower]

how much power is in the ring magnus give alec?

first, a little revisit to trsom

it's shown from scenes like this in the books that despite having the power to bring forward incapable feats or destruction, magnus doesn't want to use it, like at all. we get brief instances in the past where he used it and how much it affected him (killing his stepfather, creating earthquakes when he was upset). the status quo is set, magnus lightwood-bane and his immensely frightening, possibly corruptive magic will never accept each other's friend request again.

but then, there's this scene

the kind of power comes from the very heart of hell. we know warlocks are offsprings of demons, so it's safe to assume their heritage will somewhat show its influence in their magic. but this isn't your garden variety charm. from what the seelie girl trying to convey here, the ring literally reeks of magic from the deepest, most unpredictable and intimidating part of existence.

does alec know he's carrying a piece of magnus too-dangerous-to-not-be-unsealed-magic around him every day? and that there's no end magnus wouldn't go to, even if it's the part of himself he's terrified of, to keep alec safe?

@magnus-the-maqnificent @dustandducks @pocketoffeels

#malec #alec lightwood #magnus bane #shadowhunters #the mortal instruments #the shadowhunter chronicles #tsc #tmi #the red scrolls of magic #trsom #the land i lost #the eldest curses #tec #thoughts #meta #alec do it a favor and #never joke about world domination

[thelostgirl21]

I think one of the reasons why I absolutely adore Magnus and Alec's first time together is because, as Magnus once said, Alec is just so... innocent.

I know that fans are often equating him sort of pouncing on Magnus to passionately kiss him (as soon as he learned they had the apartment to themselves), and later eagerly pushing him towards the bedroom while starting to unbutton his shirt, as him being anything but "innocent".

But, to me, having the confidence to express his desires, going after what he wants, and taking charge of a situation - even one filled with some unknowns - is not something indicating a lack of innocence on Alec's part.

Part of it likely comes from his own temperament. Like Izzy said, he has a tendency to overthink things.

He can make brash and impulsive decisions, at times, in an effort to quickly fix issues causing him a great deal of emotional distress, true. But otherwise, he usually tries to look at a situation through as many angles as he can, collect data from a number of different sources, ask for other people's input, etc., before reaching a conclusion.

Once he does commit to a given course of action, however, he fully commits!

Not blindly (i.e. the feedback he receives from his environment will make him change course if he notices something's wrong and he's no longer sure that he's doing the right thing), but with an impressive amount of drive, willpower, and determination.

What makes him such a formidable leader, IMHO, is that he's got the strength of his convictions, while said convictions remain flexible and adaptable in light of any newly acquired information.

Whenever he realizes he's made a mistake, he's able to own it, figure out / explain why he made that mistake, learn from it, and work on solutions to prevent making those same mistakes again.

And it is a really, really good thing. Because, driven as he is, if he was remotely dogmatic in his beliefs or unable to cope with the idea of being wrong, he'd truly be dangerous - crushing anything and anyone in his path to reach his objectives.

But the point is that Alec is someone that typically tries to measure the potential impact of his actions before he reaches a decision.

And, since all of his concerns have been dealt with before - during the "overthinking phase" - there's often no longer any need for him to hesitate or hold back while acting on it.

In this very instance, it was rather clear that becoming sexually intimate with Magnus was something that he'd had the chance to think long and hard (no pun intended) about.

Since - given he'd already been with approximately 17 000 lovers before - the likeliness of Magnus being comfortable having sex with him was rather high.

From Alec's P.O.V., I'm guessing that the only one "reasonably holding them back" from being sexually intimate with each other, technically, was Alec himself.

I have a feeling that he already knew that, deep down, he felt ready to have sex with Magnus when he went to ask Izzy for advice.

He just needed to be sure that his lack of experience wasn't making him overlook any important variables before fully "going for it".

For example: Is there anything that Izzy wished she'd have known before she had sex for the first time that she didn't? Anything specific he should be made aware of? Anything he (or Magnus) could regret?

And she basically lets him know that - since Magnus and him genuinely care about each other - it's going to be fine.

If the thought of having sex with Magnus is something that Alec wants, if it makes him happy, then the best thing for him to do is to stop worrying!

She's making it rather clear that her own experience with sexual intimacy is - thankfully - not something she regrets, and there's no reason why Alec might regret it, either.

If it is something that he does yearn for, and since he's with someone that genuinely cares about his well-being and safety, then the only thing that might ruin this for Alec is Alec himself worrying about what could go wrong.

So, Alec pouncing on Magnus - going right after what he wants and what makes him happy with pure abandon once he's sure of his decision - to me, is extremely typical of the way Alec behaves in general.

But, most importantly, I see it as a sign of complete trust in his partner.

He's comfortable enough initiating the physical intimacy and openly expressing what he wants, regardless of his own inexperience, because he trusts Magnus to guide him through the process.

As it turns out, however, Alec had overlooked some variables - namely Magnus' own fears and insecurities. And this is where Alec displays traits that really show how innocent he is, too.

He sees Magnus as someone that loves him unconditionally, and that couldn't possibly seek to hurt or take advantage of him.

Alec is in love with him, he feels loved by him, and he's got no tangible awareness, apparently, that there is a significant power imbalance between them that Magnus (thankfully) remains very aware and respectfully mindful of.

I say "thankfully", because the fact that Magnus worries about taking advantage of any situation with Alec is a good sign that Alec's trust in him isn't being misplaced.

I believe that Magnus is fully aware that, his whole life, Alec has been conditioned to meet the expectations of those he loves and depends on to feel safe.

And, while they eventually did see the errors of their ways, his parents did use how they expressed or withheld love and approval towards their children as motivational tools to get them to act certain ways, and make certain choices.

Alec was even willing to go as far as marry Lydia because he felt responsible for fixing his parent's mistakes and restoring his family's honor.

He has a tendency to readily sacrifice his own wants and needs for those he loves - to put himself second.

And Magnus knows that he's always been very honest with him regarding his past sex life history.

From appreciative "name dropping" (Michelangelo was "excellent in bed", Casanova was "brazen"...) to him having been with "men, women, seelies, warlocks, vampires... a djin or two" (about 17 000 of them!), he's made it rather clear that sex is something he enjoys indulging in every now and then.

So, it wouldn't be far fetched for Magnus to worry that Alec would have interpreted his openness about sex in general as being something that he would absolutely need to have in a relationship in order to continue being interested in his partner.

It makes sense that Magnus would be concerned that he may have unwittingly offered Alec the impression that, if he took too long before being able to "give him what he needs" to be happy or feel fulfilled in their relationship, then he might decide that being with a 20-something inexperienced virgin Shadowhunter wasn't worth it, and/or go seek "his pleasure" elsewhere.

I mean, from what I understand, Magnus himself has often been made to feel like what he had to offer was either too much, or not enough, too. He even apologetically told Alec in the beginning of their relationship "I know I'm a lot to get used to".

So, his own ability to clearly express where he stands and what he wants or needs - and have his partner understand it - has been something that he's been made to feel very insecure about.

And the last thing he wishes to do, I believe, is hurt Alec or take advantage of him; to have Alec feel like he should be sexually active with him based on any wrongly interpreted signal that Magnus might have been unwittingly sending him simply by being open and honest about his past.

And if you do force yourself to have sex with someone without truly wanting it - for fear that you might be losing them if you don't - there's a very high likeliness of your own body responding to the sexual act as some form of aggression.

Sadly, once your brain starts making associations between the feeling that some of your personal boundaries having been violated and the person you were with when that feeling occurred, you may instinctively start withdrawing from them and be uncomfortable being generally intimate with them.

So, Magnus being instinctively cautious, and refusing to immediately take Alec's eagerness to be sexually intimate with him at face value makes sense and is extremely reassuring in its own way.

Alec also display some measure of innocence in the way he responds to Magnus attempt at slowing him down, too.

It goes from this sort of still somewhat eager open confusion where he's just verbally clarifying what he wants (Okay... I thought pouncing on your significant other once you've made sure the way is clear might convey "I want us to sleep together! Let's do this! I'm ready!"... Did I miss something? Damnit, Izzy, I swear if I learn there's some sort of mating ritual you're supposed to go through first, and you never thought to tell me, I'll be so pissed!)...

...to extremely focused on Magnus when he starts expressing his own concerns with Alec's wish for them to become sexually intimate together so soon into the relationship.

Alec's not just listening to his words, but appears to be actively looking for clues in Magnus' gaze and in his behavior to help him figure out what's happening, and what he might have been missing in all of his prior "overthinking".

While Alec doesn't seem to fully "get it" (apparently totally unaware that having sex with someone before you are fully ready might put a strain on a relationship, and/or just how easy it would be for someone to take advantage of the way Alec is so openly offering himself to them), he does appear to get that Magnus is scared that he is making the decision to please him, rather than because he truly wants to.

So, to me, having Alec clearly tell him "You have nothing to worry about, I want this", right before confidently pushing Magnus towards the bedroom while starting to unbutton his shirt, doesn't translate as a lack of innocence on his part, either.

I see it more as Alec's way of reassuring Magnus that he is genuinely ready for them to be sexually intimate together. It's him trying to make Magnus feel that he's doing this for himself, first and foremost.

It's Alec wordlessly saying "I may be inexperienced, but I don't see why being inexperienced should make me apprehensive about being sexually intimate with you. I trust you, I believe I'm making the right choice for myself, and I need you to trust me, too."

Alec's innocence also shines through in the way he initiates making love with Magnus like someone that's never been hurt in love before.

In the way he doesn't seem to have any specific expectations besides sharing something that's supposedly wonderful and fun with Magnus.

His guards are completely down, and he's just this happy, giggling, fumbling mess feeling his way around and trying to figure out the steps as he goes...

When Magnus teasingly remarks "that was graceful" (referring to how they both lost their balance several times while making their way to the bed - trying to remove pieces of clothing at the same time - to finally clumsily topple together on top of said bed), Alec gets in on the humor by happily replying "Shadowhunter" while gesturing to himself, then passionately dives right back in all the kissing and groping.

It doesn't seem to occur to him - not even for a second - that some sexual partners have a tendency to take sex very "seriously", and are unable to keep their concentration when the other person is constantly giggling and laughing or even *gasp* joking.

He's not acting like he's scared of messing anything up by not knowing what he's doing, either.

He's not worried about the possibility of Magnus gossiping about having slept with a Shadowhunter, while mocking his lack of experience or "technique" with fellow Warlocks.

There isn't the slightest notion in his mind that any of this could be about Magnus' wishing to add a Shadowhunter on his already impressive list of "sexual conquests".

Until Magnus interrupts them again, there's not a single tiny bit of concern being expressed by Alec about his ability to "offer a good sexual performance", and/or "living up to his partner's expectations", either.

He's just this happy, carefree, loving partner having the time of his life, exploring something new and wonderful in his relationship with the man he loves - something that he never believed he could ever have for himself - and staying in the moment.

He's (rightly) assuming that, because Magnus saw him when it seemed no one else did, told him that being "different" was a good thing, has since been able to set up clear boundaries with him and hold him accountable in the relationship without targeting his ego, and has never tried to make him feel like he's not "good enough" for him, there's no reason why Magnus should expect him to offer anything other than himself.

There's no use for Alec to attempt to pretend he's this amazing lover when he's never been in the position of being a lover before, and Magnus has clearly told him that "he doesn't care how many people he hasn't been with" already.

Magnus makes Alec feel safe, unconditionally loved, supported, and gives him confidence.

Generally speaking, in virtually any context, he uses his own power and experience to empower Alec and help him reach his own potential, rather than seek to dominate him and make him feel small.

He's someone that Alec feels comfortable being emotionally and physically "naked" with.

I remember that the first time I heard and watched the way Alec proudly answered "Shadowhunter" - then immediately grabbed Magnus to kiss him some more (barely giving him any time to process the comment) - I was just totally overwhelmed with "feels"!

Alec is just so blissfully happy and adorably confident and way too pure for this world in this moment! And it's such a delight to watch Magnus positively respond to him and savor those moments with him.

Being innocent, in a sexual context, is not something that I personally see as turning 3 shades of red and starting to giggle nervously because someone said the word "penis" out loud, or freezing at the thought of seeing or touching a bit of skin.

I mean, seeing how comfortable Jace was with Alec walking in on him while he was in the middle of foreplay with a member of his "book club", I'm guessing that it's not the first time something like that has happened between them.

Alec himself appeared to be more irritated with Jace's blatant lack of shame or sense of interpersonal boundaries, rather than traumatized over what he saw was about to happen.

And then, there's Isabelle that, if I remembered correctly, complained about how she was constantly talking to Alec about her love/sex life, while he kept everything to himself.

So, there's no question that Alec knows what sex is, and likely sees sexual activity as something natural that is nothing to be ashamed of.

Being in his early twenties, you would sort of expect him to be surrounded by openly sexually active people and understand what's usually "going on" in a bedroom, not to mention having been given plenty of time to explore his own body.

Thus, what makes him innocent, in the context of a romantic and sexual relationship, to me, really is how he approaches lovemaking with such an open and trusting heart, while laughing, stumbling, trying to connect with his partner and focusing on them being happy together without any hint of concern or fear of being hurt in the process.

And Magnus offers Alec a safe space to be himself and fully enjoy the moment they are sharing by letting Alec set the pace and following his lead. He's stumbling, giggling, and allowing himself to be blissfully happy right alongside him, approaching the whole experience as something new and exciting.

And it is. Each partner you share a bed with is unique, and you will need to find your own shared rhythm with them.

Magnus, however, could easily have ignored all of this and spontaneously taken the role of "the experienced mentor" that will teach the "newbie" everything he knows about sex, including the "best, most pleasurable way to do it"! But he didn't.

And if you're laughing at the statement I just gave, you'd be surprised with how many partners I've had, in my teenage and adult years, that approached sex as some sort of competitive sport, boasting at their own skills and experience, and immediately tried to "take you under their wing" to "teach you all of their trade secrets" as soon as they learned that they were the most experienced out of the two.

Thankfully, my very first experience was with a guy one year younger than myself, that had only had one sexual partner before me, and who was just the sweetest, most attentive partner any virgin could have asked for.

He made the whole experience be about me being comfortable with what was happening and about us being and figuring things out together; and that was exactly what I needed at the time. He never made me feel like there was any rush for us to get anywhere specific together.

Sadly, not everyone is as fortunate. Some experienced partners appear to care way more about showcasing their skills and being praised for "giving you a good time", rather than achieving any sense of partnership.

I really believe, however, that the most experienced partner's role should always be to put themselves at the least experienced partner's level at first, so that they can then build something together from there.

Perhaps the least experienced one will be delighted to have the most experienced partner "show off" what they can do and teach them new things!

But the point simply is that it should be a choice they make, and not something that's being imposed on them from the get go on the assumption that "my job is to show you a good time and teach you stuff".

Immediately taking charge without first confirming that this is something the other wants or needs is the best way to damage the least experienced partner's confidence, make them feel like what they have to offer you with their current level of skills and knowledge isn't enough, and make them become overly fearful of taking initiative and just experimenting with different things in the bedroom.

And this is true whether the person you are with is someone you care about, love, and wish to develop a relationship with, or someone you just met at a bar and may never see again in your life.

Even if the goal of the sexual encounter isn't to build a more in depth relationship, the moment you are spending together is an intimate act where you are supposed to be partners. It's a moment where you need to make sure that you both (or all, should you be more than two) get something out of it, and feel like you are contributing to what's happening.

I have friends involved in BDSM - some of them enjoying the occasional company of a complete stranger as they feel it adds something exciting to the experience.

Anyone with a healthy approach to BDSM would tell you how important it is for any dominant/submissive dynamic to be consensual and include limits that all partners have discussed and agreed upon.

There's nothing wrong with the more experienced partner taking the lead in any sexual context, but they always need to make sure that this is what the other(s) want. Trust and communication are key - including paying attention to the non-verbal.

Thankfully, in this context Magnus handles Alec's innocence and inexperience absolutely beautifully, and is more than willing to make the moment about Alec and about the two of them.

Actually, Magnus is so skilled at matching Alec's own rhythm and sharing the experience with him, that he instinctively finds himself letting his own barriers down.

Apparently, Alec makes love with such an open heart and soul - hiding no part of himself in the process - that Magnus can't maintain his own glamour to hide any part of himself from Alec, either.

And, just like that, the power dynamic is changed!

In the Shadow World, Shadowhunters consider themselves the superior race since they share blood with the angels.

They are warriors of light imbued with Heavenly powers that proudly display their runes for anyone (except Mundanes, obviously) to see!

But the Downworlders - that share blood with demons - are taught to hide their "shameful demonic heritage" and are expected to constantly fight against their "demonic nature" that makes them "naturally more prone" to violence, decadence, evil actions, and so forth.

Warlocks may be the most powerful species of the Shadow World, they also are the literal children of demons - hybrids that can't even have their own children and who are carrying a physical mark that reflects their demonic parentage.

Some Shadowhunters apparently used to take those marks as trophies (it's pretty clear that Circle members still do), and it seems to be one of the ways that Shadowhunters sometimes use to confirm the identity of a warlock.

Later, we also learn that Magnus has been vulnerable to Asmodeus' influence as a child because he was the only other person he'd ever met with "eyes like his".

Magnus' eyes are tied to a lot of shame, early rejection (including his mother killing herself and abandoning him, when he was nine, when she finally realized what her son's cat eyes meant), and overall bad memories.

I think that the only times, until then, that we'd seen Magnus with his glamour down on the show was when he was trying to drive people away / intimidate them / remind them of how powerful and potentially dangerous he (or a spell he is performing) is.

It's when he wants people to remember that he's also "part monster", that they would do well not to get on his bad side, or make sure that someone requiring his services understands the type of forces they are dealing with.

Jocelyn Fairchild knocking at his door to get Clary's memories removed, those Circle members in the club, the one Magnus was fighting in his apartment...

They are all people that Magnus wanted to send some form of warning to, whether the warning was hostile, or not.

And suddenly, those "monster eyes" are on full display for Alec to see in a context where he wishes to make Alec feel safe and avoid anything that could ever drive him away.

Thanks to him having lost control over his glamour, Alec is now concerned that he's done something wrong...

And, although Magnus is quick to reassure Alec that his current reaction has nothing to do with something he did - or with him not wanting to share this intimate moment with him - he's still avoiding Alec's gaze, seemingly withdrawing from him, and offering no coherent or clear explanation as to why.

But, try as he might, Magnus can't bring the glamour back on, so he's essentially got two choices...

He can either trust that Alec won't leave once he sees his warlock mark, and that he'll be able to accept that it is a part of him that he can't always control (apparently).

That, should Alec find his eyes' appearance unsettling, they'll find ways to manage the situation until Magnus becomes better at maintaining his glamour around Alec while the two of them are being intimate with each other. Maybe get creative with the use of blindfolds?

Or he can continue to let Alec worry over what's happening while stubbornly keeping his eyes closed and refusing to look at him until he gets the glamour back on, thus maintaining a certain form of "barrier" between them.

Magnus thus chooses to take the risk of allowing himself to be vulnerable with Alec once again - allowing him to see him without any glamour - so he'll understand that his reaction wasn't caused by anything Alec did.

Or actually, maybe it was caused by something Alec did; just not by something Alec did wrong.

And I also love the way that Alec's expression doesn't change right away once Magnus finds the courage to turn around.

I love that Alec briefly continues to just look at him like he's still trying to figure out what's wrong with Magnus now that he's FINALLY able to look in his eyes - steadily searching for the answer there like he did earlier.

I like to think that Alec sort of initially just mentally went: "Okay, that's good, I've managed to get him to look at me. Now, I just need to convince him that it's okay for him to tell me what he meant by "los - OH!"

That the moment he realizes the eyes he's been looking into have changed color and appearance, he breaks into that slightly amused smile (mostly amused at himself for having been too focused on trying to read the emotions written there to immediately notice the change); relieved to know that Magnus and him will be okay.

Because, just like Madzie's gills looked incredibly cool, Magnus' cat eyes are absolutely gorgeous, and Alec knows he's just falling in love with his boyfriend's eyes all over again, gladly getting lost in their depth.

Alec can only hope that Magnus will believe him when he tells him that they are beautiful, that he's beautiful... That it will help relieve some of the pain, fears, and concerns he sees reflected in them...

Meanwhile, Magnus watches Alec go from being a concerned, confused, and inquisitive puppy; to a relieved, mesmerized, and adoring one in a matter of seconds!

Next thing he knows, there's a warm, gentle hand against his cheek; and a pair of open, steady, loving hazel eyes staring right back into his own, tenderly anchoring him there while Alec is calling his cat eyes beautiful, telling him that he's beautiful - all of him - with all the love and sincerity he can muster.

Magnus can allow himself to relax, lovingly reach up to caress the hand resting on his cheek while lazily blinking back at him in wonder.

His cat eyes - that Magnus had usually used to inspire respect and fear, to remind people of his powers and appear more intimidating - aren't driving him away.

For some reason, they appear to be drawing Alec in instead, inspiring him to move even closer to him rather than farther apart. And perhaps - just perhaps - if Alec can love them and see beauty in them, he might be able to learn to love and fully own that part of himself, too.

One of the things that fascinate me about Alec is that, once he found out that his parents and the Clave had lied to him his whole life about their involvement in the Circle, it's like he made the conscious decision to bring all of his perceptions of the Downworld back to factory reset.

He was able to recognize that all of the prejudices he'd ever had about warlocks, vampires, and other Downworlders weren't based on facts, and that there was no actual evidence that Downworlders were better or worse people just for having demon blood.

Instinctively, we fear what we don't know or don't understand - what we haven't been familiarized with when we were young. We perceive what isn't "like us" or "a part of our usual environment" as potential threats.

ROBERT: [Magnus]'s reputation precedes him. And even for a warlock, he’s a bit of a lothario. Alec, there’s so much that you don’t know about him.

ALEC: Well, then I plan to get to know him.

Alec's not denying that there are tons of things he doesn't know nor understand about Magnus, simply stating that he's not going to let that lack of knowledge make him treat Magnus as inherently "bad" or dangerous because of it.

He's going to take the time to get to know him - seek to better understand him - and he'll adapt his opinion of him based on what he sees, learns, finds, and experiences, rather than the opinion of people that have never bothered spending time with him, nor made any efforts to get to know him for who he is rather than what he could potentially do "as a warlock".

Better yet, he's going to start exploring the rest of the Downworld and getting to know their people as if he was experiencing their world and taking a look at them for the very first time, too.

When it comes to Magnus and the Downworld, Alec is choosing to leave himself open and trusting in the face of the unknown, rather than risking to unfairly treat them as threats to keep himself and fellow Shadowhunters "safe" from things they don't understand, yet are too fearful to go explore.

And, unlike Aldertree, he's wise enough to avoid treating anecdotal bad experiences, no matter how tragic or terrible they may be, as facts that can be generalized to all of the Downworld.

Just because the breaks of your car have malfunctioned and caused a crash doesn't mean that every car you'll climb in is ill-fated to have malfunctioning breaks and crash.

Alec is obviously not "innocent" all the way through. He grew up in a world of politics and is perfectly aware of the mind games and power plays that can and often occur there.

He was also emotionally and psychologically abused by parents that used his feelings to get what they wanted out of him (they may have thought they were doing it to protect their children from their past and the Clave, their behavior with their children was still controlling and abusive, even putting Jace, Isabelle, and Alec in the roles of the golden, invisible, and scapegoat child, respectively).

And that's sort of the point. Now that Alec has snapped out of it, he's very perceptive and typically good at noticing and identifying patterns of emotional manipulation, and/or when someone's motivations and goals go against the welfare of those they are supposed to be protecting.

And treating Downworlders as people also means avoiding to fall into the trap of idealizing them by believing that none of them ever would abuse their powers, among others.

Alec may have decided to start trusting and valuing Downworlders with an open heart, and utterly be refusing to see them as a threats based on their reputation and everything he doesn't know about them, but he still allows himself to have an opinion of each individual he meets.

Be they Shadowhunters, Downworlders, or Mundanes, if the individual's actions and motives appear to be self-serving, and/or threatens to bring harm to others, he won't trust nor support them.

But Magnus himself is the one that helped him realize that the way he'd been raised was wrong, and "snap out" of the manipulation and abuse he'd been the victim of. He's the one that inspired him to start questioning the "truths" he'd been blindly taught by the Clave, and to follow what he knew in his heart was right.

Magnus is the one that, while holding Alec accountable for his actions and letting him know when he didn't approve of his behavior, never tried to minimize what Alec was going through nor pretend that he was wrong for feeling the way he did.

In some ways, Alec is far from being innocent, but in others, he truly is.

He's never been in romantic relationship nor had sex with anyone before, he gets upset over the poor tunas being described as "fatty" on the menu of a sushi restaurant, he grew up being pretty sheltered from everything that exists outside of the Shadow World...

And, with Magnus, he doesn't need to pretend that he knows more than he does, nor hide any of that innocence from him, because he knows that he won't be judged for it, mocked about it or, especially, taken advantage of because of it.

He can afford to let his guards down and embrace that side of him that is filled with innocence and wonder because Magnus respects, values, and nurtures it.

What Magnus receives, in return, is the love and acceptation of someone that refuses to let other people's opinions or even blood connections dictate how he should see the world and others, takes the time to truly look at him, and openly tell him what he sees.

Alec doesn't care what warlocks marks are "supposed to mean" according to the Clave. Madzie's gills are cool-looking, so why shouldn't he compliment her on them?

Magnus' eyes are beautiful and he loves them, so why pretend otherwise?

"There is nothing ugly about you."

"I don't care who your parents are. I care who you are."

"You are the furthest thing from a greater demon."

After all, Alec's parents used to be Circle members, and he's the furthest thing from being Circle member, too.

All I can hope is that telling Magnus out loud that he shouldn't carry the burden nor shame of his parents' actions, or the fact that someone took advantage of him at his most vulnerable to try to turn him into someone he's not, is helping Alec truly internalize the fact that his family's crimes and mistakes aren't his to fix, and the way he'd treated or behaved with Downworlders before he realized how wrong his parents and the Clave were isn't something he should feel guilty about, either.

Take steps to make up for his mistakes and show proper responsibility for Downworlders who are under his people's protection, yes. Acknowledge what he did wrong and why it was wrong, absolutely.

But it doesn't make him a terrible person nor puts him at fault. He still deserves to be loved, cherished, put first, and be reminded of how beautiful he is, too.

I think what makes Malec such a beloved pairing is the amount of love and acceptance they have for each other, and their willingness to emotionally empathize despite their very different backgrounds and experiences.

Relationships do take efforts, but it is important not to overlook the type of efforts they require.

Relationships aren't about making the effort to change the other person to better suit yourself, nor to change yourself to become what the other person wants.

Because, while healthy relationships do, indeed, inspire people to change and (hopefully) become better; they do so by "unlocking" parts of ourselves that we didn't dare acknowledge, explore, develop, and/or express until then.

They do so by offering a supportive, loving, and safe environment for certain aspects of our personalities to hatch, take root, and/or grow.

But those are changes that come from within.

You can offer a romantic partner opportunities for change as much as you want, if they do not feel like they have anything to gain by embracing them (or worse, if their goal is to dominate and control the relationship), nothing good will come of it.

Those efforts, instead, are about learning to know and understand each other, finding the right balance between your partner's needs and your own, leaving your ego at the door while trying to resolve conflicts, admitting to being wrong when you are, showing appreciation and respect towards your partner for taking responsibility for their mistakes when it turns out that you are right, and seeking to come out of any conflict or difficult situation with the two of you having gained or learned something out of it, and with your partnership having ideally grown stronger from the experience.

Those efforts are about being willing to pool resources together to support and make each other stronger. They are about finding how to make your respective differences work in such a way that they complement each other, and accept that there are aspects of your lives where you'll need to agree to disagree.

Relationships take efforts, but they require healthy efforts.

And some of those efforts, thankfully, turn out to be more rewarding than anything else.

Because, while Magnus does have to make the effort of being mindful that he's Alec first romantic and sexual relationship, and he does have to make the effort of giving him space to explore, take risks, and set the pace for the both of them, he seems to be enjoying every single second of it.

Since Alec grew up in such a very sheltered environment, there are tons of things in the Mundane world - and even just life in general - that he's yet to have tasted, touched, seen, heard and experienced.

By loving him - by emotionally connecting with Alec - he gets the chance to re-experience many of the things he loves with him for the first time, too.

I have absolutely no trouble imagining Magnus bringing Alec to his favorite restaurants not so much for the food itself, but to drink in the sight of Alec tasting it and listening to him commenting on it - regardless of whether he ends up enjoying the same foods he does or not.

When they walk hand-in-hand in the streets of a foreign city, Alec is likely to pay attention to things that Magnus himself may never have noticed before, and appreciate details that he may have grown to take for granted over time, or stopped noticing after a while.

And, after having grown up with parents that - in Alec's own words - have drilled into him that he was never good enough, Alec has met someone that finds delight and joy in almost everything he does, and who treats him like he's the best thing that has ever happened to him in hundred of years!

Somehow, their respective needs and wants work together in a very beautiful and organic way.

They are different and they do come from different worlds, but their core values, personalities, ability to derive genuine happiness from their partner's own experience of it, and their desire to treat their relationship as a true partnership makes it work and allows them to overcome challenges together.

Magnus offered Alec a world he never thought he'd ever be allowed to have and experience.

Alec offered Magnus the key to opening his heart and fully emotionally connecting with all the wonders and joys of their world.

Magnus' powers is the magic he was born with, but Alec's love and innocence is the magic he chose to bring home with him and keep safe.

#Malec #Magnus Bane #Alec Lightwood #Alexander Lightwood #Shadowhunters #My thoughts #My stuff #Except for the video at the bottom from YouTube #Videos #My Post #Apparently Alec isn't the only one that tends to overthink things... #I just have way too many feels about these two lately #The art of coming in late to a fandom... #And word-vomitting meta upon it... #I might recover from that pairing... #One day... #Or maybe never... #Yeah never's good...

[buffyspeak]

i mean i know people were upset that alec didn’t say anything like “hey don’t do that” when magnus said he would die if it meant getting jace back and that magnus didn’t contradict alec when he said he was nothing without jace and like. i get it but i think it also speaks to them understanding each other more deeply, which also maybe speaks to them finding some common ground after their fights. alec knows what it’s like to feel the weight of responsibility and guilt so much that you’ll do anything to make it right, even risking yourself. and he knows there’s probably not much he can do to dissuade magnus. magnus in turn knows what jace means to alec and that even though alec is a complete whole person on his own, the fact remains that a) alec himself doesn’t necessarily feel that way and b) on some level alec will be a fundamentally changed person if they can’t save jace and/or if he dies. because he knows the depth of grief intimately and he knows how wrapped up in each other’s identities parabatai get.

#shadowhunters rewatch 2023 #malec #magnus bane #alec lightwood #shadowhunters meta

[alexanderlightweight]

Hi not a prompt, but i love your writing soo soo much! I wanted to know what are your headcanons for malec and the SH universe in general. Also have you read the books?

oooh okay so i loved this ask and here we go. it's a bit long jsyk

Oh wow, okay. My headcanons for malec. This might get a bit long and it’s not going to look pretty so please bear with me because I don’t have the time to make it look nice though I’ll do that eventually.

So first things, individually.

I think alec is autistic and demi-sexual and I pretty much write that into my fics. I also am pretty hardcore in the belief that malec are soulmates and that’s often written into my work/implied/referenced oh, and he’s a slytherin

Magnus I headcanon as adhd and a ravenclaw because while he’s ambitious, his interest in knowledge and learning and inventing (he created the portal and worked with a shadowhunter to do it) is one of his biggest traits and also, you can’t tell me that one of the signs of an adhd warlock wouldn’t be them just tossing things into the void because object permanence and realizing three centuries later that was one of their favorite cups and they miss it. Or even ‘oops, that’s where that spell book went. Got distracted’. (saeth   adhd and let me tell you if they had magic. This would be them. Half the things in the house would be tossed into the void BECAUSE THEY DO THAT WITHOUT MAGIC and I am projecting lol) anyway ravenclaw because I feel like magnus just really loves learning and knowing things tbh. Team immortal is there no matter how dark magnus is and they support him through everything unless they’re dead and I don’t normally write that they’re both gone, if even one of them is.

I don’t think I could write a universe where Alec hated Magnus, not after meeting him. There’s something about Magnus that calls to Alec instinctively, in a primal way and Alec is kind of helpless to resist it and more than that, he usually doesn’t want to. It takes more effort for him to ignore and avoid magnus, than it does to give in. The same for magnus, though he tries better to hide it.

Magnus is the more wary of the two tbh, once alec falls he falls. Once he takes that first step and kisses magnus, there is no turning back for alec and that’s pretty overwhelming for him. Also this is just the way alec is wired and how he loves. He’d rather make sacrifices and cut out other things than lose magnus and he often struggles with what he wants and what he feels he needs to do. Because alec is used to sacrificing what he wants and loves so a part of him probably always feels like he shouldn’t be allowed to keep magnus. Which is why its so important that he’s kept, because the choice is out of his hands and he no longer has to battle against himself and the brainwashing that was beat into him.

Letting magnus keep him is probably the most selfish thing Alec ever does and it’s also the best thing for himself.

In my fics where they’re already established relationship, i often skipped the parts where magnus has lowered his guard enough to let alec in and fully let himself love him. Like magnus is already gone before alec ever kisses him in canon but he’s in denial and trying to protect himself. They fall near the same time but they’re both in denial for different reasons.

In soulmate au’s and fics like Elysium’s Tears, there are often outside factors that let Alec slip past Magnus’ boundary guard. In the fics that there aren’t those factors, Magnus normally finds a way to bind alec to him and keep him. Because magnus is too protective of his own heart to let alec in when there is a risk he could leave.

And alec is, as I mentioned. Very happy to be kept.

In most of my fics, alec stays on as hoti and tbh, magnus adores his competent shadowhunter but he’d much rather someone else deal with the drudgery and alec just supervise them. Which is why magnus is very invested in mirai’s health in a lot of my fics.

I write competent shadowhunters and warlocks btw.

Who use common sense because they’re militaristic but they’re not soldiers. They’re hunters and they need to have instincts and be able to think for themselves when their leader is unavailable and they are tracking prey or being tracked.

And I write warlocks as if they, you know, actually live in a world that had a genocide happen 20 years ago. Wary, battle worn and with a lot of defensive magic and jewelry. Because that shit doesn’t fade, especially when you’re already long lived and weary.

I write malec as Dom/Magnus and Sub/Alec because that’s my headcanon and I don’t plan on changing that. That’s just how my thoughts of their dynamic works and even when it’s not explicit, it’s how I tend to write things. I don’t want to get into it because it often gets gross, but I’ll say I don’t think dom = top or sub = bottom. Its just sex and scenes and the enjoyment they derive from it and how I end up writing is often based on what kind of intimacy I’m trying to convey.

Excerpt from ‘an extension of you’s notes on ao3:

also i will not write my characters being transphobic (unless it's a rare occasion i want to write asshole about to get curb stomped and crushed and even then that’s rare because i normally don’t want to write about it). Alec has had a lot of conversations about genitalia and gender with magnus and it took a while but he figured it out because honestly, alec had never given it much thought before. if a guy had been giving birth, alec would have still been just as horrified by the vaginal fluid. the same way he was horrified to be propositioned by a woman, even if she had a cock. it just, his brain does not compute. cat is pleasantly surprised btw, because of how rampant all the prejudice-phobias are in shadowhunter culture.

alec is demi-sexual coded in a lot of my fics because i headcanon that and i am also repulsed by genital and birthing fluids.

alec: my boyfriend is my boyfriend regardless of whats in his pants. and if i end up not liking it we'll just do other things for as long as he wants, because it's his body and he gets what he desires in his pants.

magnus: i desire you in my pants

alec: magnus this is supposed to be serious

magnus: im always serious about wanting you

— end excerpt –

I headcanon that alec loves strawberries and raspberries and has terrible eating habits because of how he was raised and trained. And that magnus wants to pamper alec in every way he can with decadence. Alec likes the fruitier/tart drinks and avoids gin and vermouth and he loves champagne and once he gets used to the burn, whiskey. Beer is a hit or miss and he’s not fond of ipas.

Magnus doesn’t necessarily change alec’s style, but he does change his wardrobe. Switching it out for softer clothing and nicer textures, more protective features. Sometimes alec feels adventurous and he’s always allowed to browse magnus’ closet but magnus doesn’t push him unless they’re going out and alec’s exasperatedly fine with magnus coordinating their outfits. He’s hopelessly endeared by it actually.

Alec likes watching magnus enjoy himself and magnus enjoys alec watching him and they both are winning but they both think it’s for the wrong thing. Alec thinks magnus enjoys the shopping and magnus thinks alec likes watching him try on things. Which I mean is a perk, for alec, but not the draw.

There is just a lot of mutual adoration from the two tbh. Alec is touch starved and Magnus is hungry to touch and be touched and alec is shocked that he’s allowed to touch and delighted by it.

And appreciated. Alec isn’t used to being appreciated and magnus is very appreciative and in the same turn, magnus isn’t used to being worshiped and alec worships him

Magnus loves confident alec btw, he just also likes turning confident alec into a blushing mess because alec is: heart eyes motherfucker

I think the reason I sometimes say I write soft/dark and soft/horror is because there’s never really a universe where alec isn’t mesmerized by magnus and magnus isn’t entranced in return. So there’s always this element of longing/wonder between them, even in the darker of verses. It’s really hard to not have those parts when it’s just so intrinsic to them and it’s why even in something like kiss with a fist, I’ve been told the ending is very soft.

Also I have not read the books, but saeth has and so they tell me information from it when I need it and I do incorporate small details that they share.

and alec will always end up immortal in my verses even if it's not stated.

Putting this on here with a link since I don’t want to overload the page:

okay so yeah, i hope you like this insight?

<3 lumine

#lumine talks to ppl #lumine answers asks #writing wednesday answers #malec #shadowhunters #lumines meta abyss

[faejilly]

Tangential Tuesday

Or something like that.

Inspired by @alexanderlightweight's "Writing Wednesday" and my magpie brain being even more dysfunctional than usual of late, I am opening up my askbox for requests! With the usual caveat that whatever I come up with may bear very little resemblance to whatever you thought you had in mind ;)

I am accepting:

Writing Prompts! (You may cruise my #prompt requests tag for ideas if you'd like, just be sure to tell me which meme if applicable.) If you're a relatively recent follower/lurker my writing tag is #jilly writes and my ao3 is here.

Omegaverse Prompts for @knotinmyname's Anti-AI event June 12-16

Lore/worldbuilding questions/headcanons

Podfic requests (Fic under 2.5k words only please, as I am too rusty to figure out multiple chapters at this point.) My fic or anyone else's is fair game; if the author doesn't have a blanket permission statement I'll ask them discreetly before I record anything, and if I can't get permission I'll let you know.

Primary Fandoms:

Shadowhunters (TV): I tend to write Malec, and I probably won't write either Alec or Magnus with someone else, but I enjoy the entire extended cast so feel free to go wild.

BioWare: Mass Effect, Dragon Age, Jade Empire

I have however written the occasional meta & fic or podficced everything from Heyer Regency Novels to Stranger Things to Firefly/Serenity to Ladyhawke to Code Realize to Choice of Romance to SDV to 7kpp... so if you've got an idea for something else, feel free to ask! Especially if you've ever seen my reblog it. If I can't come up with anything I'll let you know.

And I'll try and make a slightly more coherent post next week, but if I wait for that I'll never start :D

#tangential tuesday #that's a ref to my old blog title #for anyone who knew me 10-13 years ago #yes I've been on tumblr that long #you'd think I'd have a better idea what I was doing by now? #and yet #jilly spam

[kittyisaddicted]

Stages

Somewhere this year I just gave up. No, I gave in. Gave in to the irresistible sponge that is my endorphin and serotonin seeking bubbly thing of a brain. My return to tumblr was a hell ride from start to now, and I enjoyed every bit of a sick second of it. 

Going through new and still ongoing shows with you all made me realise that my personal deal with media addiction comes in stages–just like grief, in a way. So bare with me for the 7 stages of (my) media addiction. 

Stage 1

The encounter. Gifs, scenes, little snippets from fics. The inacurate quotes kind of thing that makes me go “This might be interesting”. Going into the tags, a short google search (because tumblr search, you know, … sucks), the like. Finally googling: Where to watch …. And maybe having the luck to not need another streaming service grave for my earnings or a VPN to enjoy another mind and heart soaking piece of fiction. 

Stage 2

The beginning. Episode 1, the story unfolds. I’m chill. Watching episode 2. Seeing scenes I already know because of, you know, tumblr. All seems normal so far. Until I binge episode 3, 4 and 5 and stay up late for episode 6 and maybe get late to wor…

Stage 3

The pull. Or: the binge. If I’m lucky, there’s only one season so far. Or *only* 3 (though no one of us was lucky to have only 3 seasons of Malec Shadowhunters Malec). If there’s more, then welp, because life is now circling around watching episode after episode like earth circles the sky, no hostage taken, every spare second is dedicated to w a t c h i n g! Also, every second of the day is about thinking and every night is dreaming about it. I’m all in. 

Stage 4 

The high noon of addiction. Watching episodes alone is not enough anymore. I rewatch. I re-rewatch scenes on YouTube. I celebrate fan videos there also. My serotonin is up and running, i’m basically high all the time. I heavily search tumblr for meta, for gifs, for meta gifs. My brain and my heart are full, no space for anything else. Working is hard, living a normal life even harder. I’m constantly on my devices, consuming everything I can find, feeling both happy so many creators already did an amazing job and sad about possibly missing out something important, pure FOMO ensues. On the outside I try to seem normal, on the inside I’m craving MORE. MORE. MORE. 

Stage 5

The crawling. Now. Comes the phase where I not only unconsciously know but fully realise that there are actors behind those amazing scenes. That there where a lot of people putting a lot of work into this so it turns out as amazing at it is. And because I never get enough, I dive into their accounts, the meta about them and their relationships, the conventions, the interview snippets, the behind the scenes, the bloopers, there is. so. much. to. see. and. read!!! I am living in an alternate universe basically, borders between reality and fiction fade, the soundtrack is on heavy rotation, I quote both the show and the actors without having any mutuals in real life who know what I am talking about. 

Stage 6

The assimilation. I wake up from a fever dream. Life get’s easier again. As the whole show and cast live now rent free in my head, I can start to shift my interest from the original to the fan made bits and peaces, aka the fan fiction–canon, noncanon, doesn’t matter as long as the writing is in character and I get to know them better through the eyes of talented authors. The tags have a special place on the shelves of my well curated tumblr and ao3 lists (because you know, #The Serotonin is stored in the Ao3) and at least five of my brain cells have another content than my latest blorbo. 

Stage 7 

The retreat. My brain leaves me space for new things. I can concentrate again on other things beside them™, like, well, working, cooking, sleeping, you name it. My sweeties have a special place in my heart from now on, and I will always willingly come back to them for comfort. But right now, the urge to follow everything about them, to dedicate everything I have to them, is gone or, better, just a silent thought in the back of my head. 

#and then of course I am ready to start it all over with the next one #going in circles like any good addict would do #in shorter terms every time #so someday I will go from one phase into the other simultaneously for multiple shows #but for now I regret nothing #supernatural #destiel #good omens #ineffable husbands #shadowhunters #malec #peaky blinders #thomas shelby #stranger things #suits #harvey x donna #how to get away with murder #connor walsh #kinnporsche #kinnporsche the series

[arialerendeair]

I posted 2,570 times in 2022

That's 1,012 more posts than 2021!

106 posts created (4%)

2,464 posts reblogged (96%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@cenedrariva

@cuubism

@theawkwardterrier

@murderturtles

@thuriweaver

I tagged 1,173 of my posts in 2022

#dreamling - 618 posts

#dream of the endless - 245 posts

#the sandman - 183 posts

#aria posts - 146 posts

#hob gadling - 127 posts

#sandman - 83 posts

#yes - 58 posts

#malec - 50 posts

#i love this - 45 posts

#my heart - 30 posts

Longest Tag: 136 characters

#but i really do believe people need to understand it’s not loving the source media as much as it is loving the relatability of the media

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Challenge Mode

50,000 words.

48 Hours.

Starting now.

Wish me luck!

65 notes - Posted November 19, 2022

#4

I’ve seen so much meta and so many posts about Nightmare as Dream’s other form, but I am obsessed with the other side of Nightmare’s coin.

What about Daydream? What about Dream when he’s in the fresh blush if love that’s like the first days the flowers bloom in spring? What about Dream when he had a wife and son and his son’s music echoed across the Dreaming?

What about two parents who were so tied to creation, teaching their son to sing, and to play music, and the Dreams that must have been created before it turned to sorrow. What about the happy side of the coin?

I’m just having a lot of emotions about Dream’s other aspects. I just. I love Nightmare. I love writing Nightmare (and Torment, who is a step beyond Nightmare in my mind), and their opposites. Who are Dream, and… well. Daydream.

66 notes - Posted November 14, 2022

#3

Alec Lightwood Birthday Bash - Prompt Fill

From @to-the-stars-writing

I've seen a thousand amnesia fics, one or the other forgetting who they are, but what about a dual-amnesia fic where something happens on a mission or because of a spell and the others come in to find Magnus and Alec both temporarily forgot who they are, but they're still flirting like crazy with one another

~!~!~!~!~

When Alec woke up, there were three problems immediately apparent.

Number one, he was chained to the wall.  

Number two, he no longer had his stele, his bow, or seraph blades.

Number three, there was someone else across the cell and he looked like he was in even worse shape, if that was somehow even possible.  Which meant that he was going to be rescuing not just himself, but someone else too.  

"Hey," Alec hissed, glancing toward the ominous looking door.  "Hey, open your eyes.  I can't do this alone, and need your help."  

No movement, which meant that the other man was truly unconscious.  Alec frowned as he took the other man in properly - pants that, angels below, were they painted on?  A shirt that was... less fabric than it was supposed to be based on the slashes he could see, and a faint sheen of glitter on his eyes and hair could only mean one thing.  He was trapped in this cell with a warlock, for angels knew whatever reason.  

Alec looked around the cell again and tugged at his chains.  He had a little bit of give, which was more of a blessing than he would have expected, and his feet weren't chained to the ground.  Another quick check confirmed that he still had his boots, and even though the small knife he kept in the holster was gone (dammit, Jace was going to pout about that for hours, that had been a present), what he actually needed was not.  

Taking a second, Alec took a deep breath and focused - most of his runes had expired, but he could still hear the sound of guards much further down from their cell.  The only breathing he could hear belonged to him and the warlock nearby.  Which meant if he made a little bit of noise it wasn't going to bring anyone running.  He looked down at his boots and took a deep breath, testing all of his weight on the chains for a long moment.  

"Why do I get the feeling that you're about to do something devastatingly ridiculous that only shadowhunters know how to do?"

Alec looked up at the quiet voice and saw that the warlock was awake, relaxing.  At least he wouldn't have to be running around with an unconscious body.  That would have made things frustrating and unreasonably difficult.  "You have a better idea?  Magic, maybe?" he hissed back.  

The warlock hummed and shook his head.  "Unfortunately, however we ended up here and based on the..." he wrinkled his nose and licked his lips.  "Memory loss drought I can still taste the after effects of, my magic has either been drained, or I spent all of it.  I'm not without some skills, but nowhere near your own, I imagine."  

"I'll stand for you being able to walk," Alec muttered, ignoring the way that sparkling gold nail polish on his fingers shone on the faint light of the cell.  "You injured anywhere?"  

"Thankfully no."  A faint rustle.  "I am, however, not standing on the ground, so all of my weight has been on my shoulders and arms."  

Alec winced in sympathy.  That was going to mean he'd be able to walk but not do much in the way of fighting while his arms got their feeling back.  "I should be able to get us out of here," he reassured and looked up at his hands again.  "This might take me a couple of tries."  

He took a deep breath and lifted his legs carefully out in front of him.  Breathe in deep, and then move.  Shifting slowly with his grip against the chains, Alec brought his legs up further, bending himself almost in half to fumble with the secret latch on the side of his boots.  

"Darling, yoga instructors would envy that flexibility," the warlock praised.  "Not to mention that it does give one a wide variety of IDEAS, the nature of which is entirely inappropriate for our current predicament."  

Alec fought down the urge to snort, his arms starting to burn before he'd worked the lock pick half out of his boot.  He dropped his legs back down and breathed through the burning of his arms.  "Fuck, I need at least one more round."  

The warlock chuckled.  "Please feel free to do that as many times as you like.  I am quite enjoying the view.  I might enjoy a more practical demonstration later."  

Alec snorted.  "Pretty sure this is not the place to be flirting."  

"On the contrary, it's the perfect place to be flirting," the warlock correct.  "My name is Magnus, and I will be happy to take you out to dinner after this is over."  

"Your wife wouldn't like that," Alec said, his eyes drifting to the ring on Magnus' finger.  He took another deep breath and forced himself to relax, waiting for the burning to subside.  

Magnus looked at the ring on his finger, blinking in surprise.  "I've never had a wife, or a husband, mind you I am as equal opportunity as it comes.  Where did..." he flinched, his head aching.  "Ah, memory loss potion, right."  

Alec gave him a rueful grin.  "If it's any consolation at all, I would have said yes if you weren't attached."  He'd never met someone as beautiful as Magnus in all of his life.  If he'd had the chance, he probably never would have let someone like the warlock go.  "All right, let's try this again."  

Alec swung his legs up in an easy, determined motion and waited, breathing hard, for his fingers to bump against the lock pick.  It took three more tugs, but at last it was free in his fingertips and he could drop his feet again with a groan.  His whole body was sore and he was going to pay for doing that without runes tomorrow, that was for sure.  "All right, now to see if I remember how to do this..."

Magnus hummed.  "Where did a shadowhunter learn the art of lockpicking, I might wonder," he said, watching as the shadowhunter bit his lip in concentration, his eyes drawn back to the delicious sight of those lips reddening.  

"My siblings," Alec said, and that was enough explanation, apparently, for Magnus, who said nothing further as he finished getting himself completely unlocked, carefully resting the chains against the wall. 

See the full post

67 notes - Posted September 17, 2022

#2

What it says on the tin - and I love it. 

95 notes - Posted October 8, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

A Knight’s Favor

Okay hear me out.

Renaissance Fair - Hob drags Dream along for the fun of it all, mostly for an excuse to wear some of his oldest clothing, and his replica claymore (with dulled edges), attracting attention from everyone as he and Dream move together. 

They watch performances by the dozen, and take in the tournament matches, when, after it’s all over, the master of ceremonies steps forward and says that he’s going to need everyone’s help to coax someone to do an exhibition match.

Hob’s eyes are widening and he’s cursing as Evan looks up at him, smirking wide and he’s nearly scrambling out of his seat when Evan gets the crowd shouting his name in a chant, demanding he come down and put on an exhibition. 

Dream, of course, is watching all of this in amusement, and Hob’s just, embarrassed (in a proud way) and sighing.  He explains that it’d disappoint people if he didn’t, so he steals a quick kiss (which gets all of the AWWWs from the audience) and heads down to the arena.  He and Evan are kitted up, and have their weapons of choice (longsword vs. claymore was always an interesting one, since neither of them bother with shields).  

Hob is just settling into position, when a ROAR goes up from the crowd and he sees Evan laughing and gesturing behind him.  His breath catches at the sight of Dream standing there, holding out a ruby, a clear replica of HIS ruby, on a shimmering golden chain, a faint smile on his lips.  He’s approaching before he realizes it. 

“I believe it is custom to bestow a favor on the knight one wishes to win,” Dream says, his voice soft as he bends down and drapes the chain over Hob’s head, settling it against his chest before tucking it into his leather jerkin.  “Do attempt to win for me, valiant sir knight.” 

Hob’s flushed (and it has nothing to do with the light armor he’s wearing), and staring at Dream, who has the smuggest smirk on his face that he’s going to kiss off as soon as he’s done winning the battle.  But he nods, because of course he will win this fight for Dream and he turns back to Evan. 

Evan is smirking and Hob resolves to wipe that smirk off his face, and settles into a stance he hasn’t used in far too long.  He doesn’t hold back, not for a second.  He’s not going for a killing blow, only disarmament, but he can see the surprise on Evan’s face as he twists and wields the claymore in a way that only masters of it can. 

The fight is quick, brutal, and the crowd is roaring their approval. 

Hob can feel the heat of the ruby against his chest as Evan tries to push him back, forcing him into tighter combat.  A quick twist of his hips, faking dropping to one knee and Hob was able to toss Evan over his shoulder, sword and all, before spinning to point the claymore at his throat, grinning. 

Evan will laugh of course, and as the crowd cheers, he hugs Hob and thanks him for the match, and Hob turns to Dream who is...

His eyes are almost as hot as the ruby burning against his chest, the ruby that stands out against the white linen shirt he’s wearing under his armor, and Hob is grinning, triumphant and victorious as he strides towards Dream and reaches out for his hand, bowing low over it in a courtly bow before yanking his Dream into a kiss.  There’s another roar around them, but Hob forgets all of them as Dream kisses him hard enough to have him forgetting his name, let alone any silly old tournament. 

202 notes - Posted October 3, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #My year in review should literally be #“Aria did nothing relevant for the rest of the year” #“But then spent 2.5 months reblogging Dreamling NONSTOP” #“And that is all the info we have on her - thanks”

[the-great-lightwood-bane]

of love & names

Malec | Rated general | tw transphobia | Meta, ish, Trans Male Character, Trans Magnus Bane, AFAB, Transphobia, Character Study, Non-Linear Narrative, Magnus Bane-centric, Angst with a Happy Ending, Angst and Hurt/Comfort | Bingo Square: AFAB

Summary: The best thing that Asmodeus ever did for him, Magnus sometimes thought, was letting him choose his own name.

Or: Magnus is trans, has friends, and (finally) feels accepted. 

A/N: This work was created for the Shadowhunters Pride Bingo presented by the Malec Discord Server. @malecdiscordserver

Thanks to @ravenstakeflight for the sensitivity read & beta!

Read it on AO3 or below the cut.

The best thing that Asmodeus ever did for him, Magnus sometimes thought, was letting him choose his own name. 

Of course, Asmodeus had done plenty of worse things and his respect of Magnus’ gender didn’t exactly make up for that — but it was thanks to that time in Edom that Magnus had learned that no matter what physical traits he’d been born with, he could choose for himself who he was, who he wanted to be. 

Growing up, it hadn’t mattered much; daughter or son, Magnus helped his mother around the house as a child, and they didn’t exactly have the money for fancy, useless dresses. He wore efficient pants and didn’t mind that they were pink — he’d never much cared for the connotations of colour. He’d felt a vague discomfort with the name they’d given him, but he was able to ignore that well enough. But then, a few months before his warlock mark and magic showed themselves and tore his life to pieces, his step-father had begun to stop him from accompanying him into the fields; that was all right for a child, but an older girl should know better. 

I don’t want to be a girl, Magnus had complained, but his stepfather had only shaken his head at the childish foolishness and boxed his ears until he obeyed. 

It hadn’t escalated into a real problem before his magic showed up and his mother hung herself and his step-father tried to drown him and Magnus killed him with the very magic that’d ended his old life — but it had been a problem, something Magnus was aware of in the back of his mind, an uncomfortable feeling when he thought about his future. 

Asmodeus, though, cared little for such human ideas. In his care, Magnus had chosen his own name, a boy’s name that didn’t make him want to tear his skin to pieces, and Asmodeus had shrugged and called him son and let him bind his growing chest; perhaps that was why Magnus had stayed with him so long — he remembered well how cruel mundanes could be to those they saw as different. Unnatural. 

Still, he eventually realised how cruel his father was, how evil, and he returned to the realm where he’d been born with Asmodeus confined to Edom and little else but the clothes on his back. From then on, subtle glamours made him look enough like a man that nobody glanced twice at the masculine name, though they stared happily enough at the makeup and jewellery and colourful clothing — and at his darker skin, at the bisexuality that he didn’t quite flaunt but refused to hide, either. 

Sometimes, he’d use magic to pretend there was nothing wrong, nothing different about him that made him less of a man; he’d keep the glamour up assiduously, hoping that if he held it well enough he might be able to forget what he looked like underneath, but he’d sometimes let it slip and he hated that. When he looked in the mirror with the glamour up, he felt a surge of joy, of euphoria, but all too soon the glamour would drop or he’d feel the weight in his chest and that temporary relief would be gone. 

He’d wrap his chest in bandages so that even if the glamour fell, he’d be able to hide it; he moved confidently, hiding insecurities and discomfort behind the mask he learned always to wear — but whenever he was found out, whenever a partner or a friend saw what he looked like underneath the all-too-temporary spells and binders, they’d leave, sometimes turning a whole town against him, sometimes not, but always leaving. 

Until a warlock with green skin and curving horns, who helped him out of innumerable crises and eventually did see what he really looked like, and when Magnus was expecting a look of disgust or shock or hatred to come over his face, only smiled sadly and stayed. Ragnor even helped him with it — devising more spells to reduce the dysphoria that sometimes made him want to tear off his skin, helping him design a binder that he could wear for longer without pain. Ragnor was almost like the father that Magnus had always wished he could have. 

(Ragnor was also a stubborn, sarcastic, old-fashioned, grumpy bastard, but Magnus loved him anyway. And no matter how much Ragnor huffed and feigned irritation and sighed heavily at Magnus’ crazier schemes and persistent nicknames, Magnus knew he loved him back.)

And then there was Cat, who Magnus rescued from being burned at the stake — the first person who Magnus told of his own free will that he’d been born a girl and not a boy, the second person who didn’t leave. She was a doctor, a nurse, with a natural aptitude for healing magic that’d only improved as she spent her time healing people. 

(It was thanks to Cat that Magnus learned about the mundane developments that could help him; it was Cat who did Magnus’ top surgery, who set him up with hormone treatments, and suddenly he didn’t need to glamour himself anymore to look like a man. Magnus nearly cried when he looked at himself in the mirror for the first time, small scars on his chest the only sign of the surgery. He hugged her tightly and she hugged him back and if he did cry this time, she was kind enough not to comment on it. But all that came later, after the turn of the century — after Camille.) 

Camille was, technically speaking, the third person to stay after learning what he looked like underneath the glamour, but Magnus was no longer grateful to her for that. She’d stopped him from stepping off a bridge, too, and it had taken Magnus far too long to learn that he didn’t owe it to her to stay because of that. 

She’d told him that nobody would ever love him like she did, because only she would be willing to deal with him — deal with the days when he couldn’t bring himself to get out of bed until she slapped him across the face, deal with the way he was always too much, deal with the difference between the gender he preferred and the parts he’d been born with. Who else would be willing to forgive him those faults? To love him despite them? Ragnor and Cat, yes, but Camille did her utmost to cut him off from them — and anyway, that was platonic, not romantic, not sexual, and Magnus’ biological sex was never shoved in their faces. 

She insisted that Magnus keep his glamour up all the time, always — both the one over his eyes and the one that made him look more masculine. With her, Magnus would leave his binder on nearly all the time, more than was healthy or safe but it kept her near him so he ignored it. He summoned her anything she wanted, offered all that he had, cut off all the bits of himself that she didn’t like — but he still wasn’t enough. She cheated on him with anyone and everyone she wanted, told him that if he didn’t like it he could leave but he’d never find anyone like her again. 

Eventually, he did leave her — dragged himself away, bloody and bleeding under his masks and knowing that it wasn’t worth it to stay with her any longer. Had never been worth it, really, but Magnus had always been foolish in love. 

Cat and Ragnor took him back. He’d half-expected them to shut the door in his face, when he showed up at Ragnor’s door, but they welcomed him in easily. As though he’d never abandoned them for a cold-hearted woman who’d done her best to destroy him and, perhaps, succeeded. 

After that, he started the process of shutting down his heart to anyone but Cat and Ragnor. It didn’t work completely, of course — Camille always laughed at him for being soft-hearted, and it was true — but he began to calcify then, stopped opening himself up to romantic relationships. Camille had demonstrated well how devastating that kind of love could be. Magnus didn’t want to risk a second Camille; he’d barely survived her the first time, sometimes he felt he hadn’t survived her, and he wouldn’t be able to do it all again. Better, safer, to shut that part of himself away. 

Raphael came into his life, more sarcastic than Ragnor but with a softer heart than his cool exterior suggested; the decades rolled by and for the first time Magnus learned about people like him, people who were born one gender but who knew themselves to be another; he learned, too, about the hatred that they faced. The Downworld was perhaps better about it than mundanes — thanks to the Shadowhunters, they knew what it was to be unjustly oppressed — but Magnus had been burned too many times to let anyone else into his heart, into the bubble of people who knew and loved him. 

Valentine rose. Magnus had thought he’d known oppression, for his skin colour and his sexuality and his gender and the makeup he wore and, yes, his demonic parentage — but Valentine was worse than Magnus had seen before. He remembered how the Shadowhunters had broken the plates he’d eaten on, at the signing of the first Accords, but Valentine wanted to eliminate Downworlders entirely. 

Thankfully, the Circle fell, though Magnus knew well that the Clave wasn’t much better. It was during those in-between years that Cat suggested mundane surgery, top surgery; Magnus had hesitated at first for fear of the failures of mundane medicine, but he agreed, and it was so liberating to not have to wear a binder any longer, to let his glamour drop and not look like a woman underneath it. 

Then: Alexander. 

A Shadowhunter with dark hair and pale skin and obviously no idea how striking his looks were — a Shadowhunter willing to share his strength with a warlock, who obviously cared for his siblings, who smiled like the rising sun. Magnus had never been so enamoured, and the walls he’d built to carefully shuddered — cracked — and fell, fell in love with Alec, too soon and too much but Alec didn’t seem to mind. 

Magnus was terrified that Alec would go, shattering his heart along with the walls that protected it and isolated it all at once, but somehow — impossibly — Alec didn’t. Not when they fought, over Magnus’ immortality or greater experience or anything else; not even when Magnus explained, hesitant and uncertain and insecure, that he’d been born a girl — that physically, even with the surgery and the hormones, he wasn’t— he didn’t—

Alec just shushed him, gently, and promised that he wasn’t going to leave. 

For once, Magnus believed him.

#afab #transgender #transphobia #fic #my fic #mdsevent #Shadowhunters Pride Bingo 2022 #tmi #magnus bane #alec lightwood #tsc #magnus x alec #malec #alec lightwood bane #magnus lightwood bane #alec x magnus #pride

[becomingpart2]

but seriously a big part of her meta about Tobin ships was about how male characters always get the woman they want, the one who was their first choice, but women frequently end up with men who they didn’t want or who wasn’t their first choice, like with luke/lorelai, joey/pacey, ross/rachel, ted/robin, Leonard/penny, damon/elena where the man is considerably more into the woman than vise versa, and how this is obviously the result of misogyny (which I do agree). but then the question is why would she complain when this is reversed, like wouldn’t a ship like malec or Harvey/donna or oliver/felicity or sheldon/amy subvert the status quo because this time it’s the man settling? isn’t it a good thing to subvert the typical way Tobin theory goes?

A very good point! Why was she mad? Why is that less subversive than when a robin is replaced by another? The only answer I can think of is one that was pointed out in one of those links: the Tobin structure was a kink to her. She wanted her favourite character to be accepted and loved by daddy the ted, effectively pulling the rug on the character she didn't like.

I think there's also the case to be made about how all of those instances where women get what they want are representative of actual Female Ted's lol

#anonymous #answered

[normal-thoughts-official]

Alec is deeply in love with Magnus and he also just doesn't imagine not being this in love with him, so he's intense (and honest with big actions but not words) but Magnus doesn't really believe it at first, not in the sense that he thinks alec is lying on purpose just that it will pass ("it always pass") or he's accidentally exaggerating ("alec is just like this"). Since Alec thinks it just makes sense that he's this in love with Magnus ("who wouldn't be") he doesn't realise Magnus doesn't fully believe/gets how much he loves him until Magnus is finally present when Alec's about to do something stupid to save/help him or when Catarina sees the way he looks at Magnus and she just sighs and says it's the only time she'll help a shadowhunter and she just says that Magnus isn't aware of much Alec loves him, and he might not be for a little while unless they directly communicate and she leaves

tbh i think that alec is really big and intense with words??? like all the impromptu love declarations and stuff like "when i'm staring into the eyes of the man that i love"... it just sounds so intense, even the verb used (staring instead of like, gazing or something normal) and the general dramatic way alec casually says things (inner strength, which you are overflowing with... seriously what the fuck. i gotta give matt daddario a lot of kudos for managing to pull that one off without sounding cringey or weird, because i remember reading the subtitles for that and thinking "oh this is gonna sound terrible" and then he actually said it and it... didn't. it just sounded like alec is the kind of guy who's intense and dramatic enough to say stuff like this like it's normal. which is kinda the truth but isn't easy to pull off). so honestly i don't even think it's that he doesn't say it enough, it's just... that magnus doesn't really get it, like you said

like he probably has a billion reasons in his head why it isn't really true (why would it be?), some of which don't even make sense together but he's still putting them all together because it just... can't really be real, you know? because again, he's relearning that the default is not that he should be considered a hassle for existing or earning affection in a relationship with someone who supposedly loves him. believing that alec genuinely just... feels for him so strongly, strongly enough to leave earth forever and stay the rest of his life in hell just to be with magnus? that doesn't make fucking SENSE

so in his head i think it's all like... it's his first relationship, of course he's feeling everything so intensely. he's never allowed himself to express love like that before, of course now that he gets to he is so over the top. he's going to get tired of me eventually. i just happened to be the first person he could do this with, but once the novelty dulls he's going to grow tired and find someone he likes more. also, i am somehow too much for him even if he is being way more intense than i am. also, i am probably not intense enough and he will eventually grow tired of that. also, someone else is probably more deserving of all that affection anyway, although at the same time it isn't real and will eventually dull once he calms down. also,

whereas in alec's head it's just like why the FUCK wouldn't magnus know that alec loves him when he says it all the time? and why the fUCK wouldn't alec love him anyway? like it's obviously natural to him, he said that he was going to stay in edom with magnus like it was the most obvious thing on earth because just leaving him there didn't even cross his mind as a possibility. leaving magnus is not a possibility, because alec loves him, and he doesn't turn his back on people just because it's hard

and also i think to alec it's just like... i've said it, so why wouldn't he know? (again autistic icon, like... why the hell do people keep looking for hidden meanings or doubting his words or whatever? he says what he means ffs) like he told magnus time and time again that he loves him and that his past doesn't matter and that magnus is his world and is everything to him so why would magnus ever think otherwise?? it doesn't make sense

also because i think alec never really doubted his feelings. hid them, sure, and doubted whether or not he should act on them, definitely, but he never really doubted his feelings. i think alec is chronically incapable of lying to himself, tbh, he's just too practical and he's very self aware and the fact that he's mostly introverted means he gets a lot of time to contemplate himself lmao. but it was always about his choices - would he say fuck it and be with magnus, or do what's expected of him and marry lydia? - but never about what he felt. he always knew what he felt. again, he's always known he couldn't get what he wanted, which implies he's always known what he wanted. so to him, the way he feels is obvious as all fuck, and there's no reason to doubt it, and it takes him a while to realize that from where magnus is standing, it isn't as obvious

which i think he still doesn't fully get for a long time because again?? he's told him?? and there's probably some angst in there somewhere about alec feeling like he needs to prove to magnus how he feels, but really, it's not about alec at all, it's about magnus and his insecurities and his abuse history, you know? and there's nothing alec can or should do about it

also he's totally heartbroken when he realizes that magnus is still surprised by his affection, surprised to see that alec and his friends came back for him in edom at all, surprised to see alec choose him over and over again. he expects so little and it is so sad to alec because he feels so strongly for him and magnus doesn't get it

at the same time magnus being heartbroken because he knows it's not fair that he keeps doubting alec like that, alec who kept chosing him and surprising him at every turn and never gave him any reason to doubt how he feels, alec who was a lot of magnus' firsts even though magnus is hundreds of years old.... and he probably feels guilty for it too, because alec deserves someonw who understands and trusts him and magnus clearly isn't it. and alec is just more upset by magnus seeing it that way when this is not something magnus controls and alec knows it's got nothing to do with himself. and every time magnus tries to reassure him that it's not his fault, it's not about alec, on the contrary, alec has always been so amazing to him and he doesn't get why it's so hard for him to believe him fully... it just hurts for the both of them

and it's something they slowly have to navigate and learn how to deal with and that i think magnus is getting better and better at, you know, he's healing, and he's been for decades now. but it certainly still hurts for them both to know that it's so hard for magnus to accept love, especially when alec is giving it so freely, and so happy to be able to

#aaaaa now im sad #sh #shadowhunters #malec #magnus bane #alec lightwood #meta #malec meta #lowkey #ask #anonymous #long post

[ketzwrites]

Ok so I seem to remember gold/yellow as a colour being of a big significance in the Shadowhunters world (especially about Magnus and alec) but I can remember why, could you maybe jog my memory?

Hmmm, nothing in particular stands out to me about these colors, nonny. I remember that Magnus’ eyes are sometimes described as gold and I think the sheets on his bed were gold in that post-first-time morning scene. Oh, and Magnus’ magic, which was usually blue, was yellow when he borrowed Lorenzo’s magic.  

These are the yellow/gold references I can remember when it comes to Malec. Other than that, there are Jace’s eyes flashing gold when he “activates” his runes without a stele and Clace’s runes shining in gold when they were... tracking Jonathan? Was that what they were doing? 

Am I also missing some yellow/gold reference? 

#malec meta #shadowhunters #Anonymous

[carelessflower]

whenever magnus use any word that suggest an never-ending experience like eternity or endless i squeal in awe because we all know who magnus is right? immortal warlock who burdens the fate of eternal life for so long, lost so many, gained too much. but here is magnus wanting alec, feeling like loving alec need something more than eternity in order to fully love alec the way he deserve. magnus wishing his kisses with alec will never end. and isn’t that something beautiful, finding someone that make you treasure every moment with them and craving for more than eternal with them?

#malec #sobh #secrets of blackthorn hall #don’t mind me #the usual malec meta #from like two lines

[head-of-the-ny-institute]

When Magnus finally sees Alec in Edom, he just flings himself into Alec’s arms in such a forceful way. He knocks Alec off balance and makes him take a step back. He just needs to feel Alec in the shortest amount of time possible. Needs to make sure he is real. In this moment, Magnus is not graceful or choreographed like normal. He’s just Magnus, “the runaway groom,” who needs to reunite with his fiancé.

#shadowhunters #alec lightwood #magnus bane #malec #sh #sh spoilers #sh finale #sh 3x21 #sh s3 #alec #magnus #textpost #edom #alliance #mine #malec meta #malec wedding

[buffyspeak]

the thing is, alec’s response to magnus in 3.16 isn’t BAD, it’s just not what magnus wants or needs to hear answered. at least, not the full extent of it. alec’s unconditional love for him being laid out could never be a bad thing i don’t think, but he’s only really hearing one thing magnus is saying (which is essentially that alec fell in love with the high warlock of brooklyn and couldn’t possibly like him like this now) and his response to that is filled with genuine (and necessary! bc it is one part of the conversation they’re having) care as he tries to dissuade magnus from thinking it matters to him.

... but that’s uncomfortable for magnus, because it matters to HIM, and it matters a little bit that it doesn’t matter to alec. and this part is harder for magnus to put into words, harder for alec to understand in a way i’m sure magnus knows. bc it harkens back to the communication issues they were having in 3.05-3.06! and it’s that like. magic is a fundamental part of who magnus is, he doesn’t like or even know who he is without it, being without it feels BAD and unnatural, plain and simple. so for alec to stand there and list off the reasons he loves magnus (rather desperately, bc he’s getting panicked, as ya do) is NICE, but it kinda misses the point, or at least a very huge part of the point, of what magnus is trying to say. which is that he doesn’t feel like himself without magic, and i think it makes magnus more uncomfortable than he’d care to admit that alec doesn’t get or see that, that he implies (sort of unknowingly? it’s complex) that he doesn’t care about that. but of course, what alec means isn’t that he doesn’t care about how magnus feels - it’s that how magnus feels doesn’t change how alec feels about him!

#shadowhunters rewatch 2023 #malec #magnus bane #alec lightwood #but like again. #this is so off the rails and ineloquent #alas #shadowhunters meta #i actually think magnus IS the more self-aware one in this convo though #bc as frustrating as it is i think he has empathy for the fact that. alec Can't really understand his perspective #it's not that he won't or isn't trying #it's that it's not something you can understand unless you've been through it

[alexanderlightweight]

hello! I just wanted to ask which fics are in the dressed to kill mobwife!Alec verse if it's not too much trouble. I hope your wednesday is going well and give Nightshade all the pets!

okay here we go, i think this is all of them in the order of my first meta rambling and then what i've written so far.

my wednesday is going splendidly, thank you! I hope you are having a good day too!

nightshade is doing great! he just dunked himself in his pool and came in to be dried off (so nightshade loves water a lot and we have to have a dog pool for his own safety, but that means every time he goes out to pee he jumps in after to cool off) luckily we can throw the towels outside. but he's very happy and content and snoring right now.

#dressed to kill #malec #shadowhunters #writing wednesday #writing wednesdays #mobwife!alec

[faejilly]

Tangential Prompt Requests!

Inspired by @alexanderlightweight's "Writing Wednesday" I am opening up my askbox for requests! With the usual caveat that whatever I come up with may bear very little resemblance to whatever you thought you had in mind.

(Or, as I have previously put it when making things: the voices in my head are smarter than I am, and they do NOT tell me what they're doing, so we all get whatever we get and can be surprised together!)

Feel free to ask about any of my published fic, or request new ones. You may cruise my #prompt requests tag for ideas if you'd like, just be sure to tell me which meme if applicable. If you're a relatively recent follower/lurker my writing tag is #jilly writes and my ao3 is here.

I am accepting:

Writing Prompts!

Questions regarding: lore, worldbuilding, headcanons, OC's etc. (I do have a specific SH meta tag, #my sh rambling, but for all the rest it's just kind of... somewhere? 🍀)

Fanmix/Podfic requests (LMK if you need more clarification on that one.)

Primary Fandoms:

Shadowhunters: I tend to write Malec, and I probably won't write either Alec or Magnus with someone else, but I enjoy the entire extended (TV) cast so feel free to go wild.

BioWare: Mass Effect, Dragon Age, Jade Empire

Secondary Fandoms are too numerous to list and include an eclectic range of books/TV shows/movies/video games. Feel free to ask about anything, especially if you've seen me flail about it here or post something on ao3/spotify. I will enjoy the question, even if don't have an opinion, promise!

If you'd like some suggestions about stuff I'm currently working on?

Highlights From The Unending WIP List of Doom™️

#apples vs oranges (not on AO3 yet) A Malec a/b/o story with Nephilim!wings and weird lore and fantasy politics. (Yeah, I will eventually manage a better blurb for that.)

d.c. al coda: DA2 epilogue(s) (Adelaide Hawke/Sebastian Vael)

they have hung my heart with a sunset reasonably canon compliant Shadowhunters epilogue with Inquisitor Alec Lightwood & High Warlock of Alicante Magnus Bane in Alicante

Floralegia: Weaver Shepard from Mass Effect (original trilogy, f!shenko, earthborn, war hero, paragon, nerd, etc.)

clizzy!AU a very much not canon compliant Shadowhunters epilogue where-in they are all still in NYC and also eventually I will get Clary & Izzy to make out. Hopefully.

Anything 7KPP!

mer!Alec

Sagacious Zu/Spirit Monk (#Icy Yaling) from Jade Empire

I have discovered, these last few weeks, that I am kind of terrible at doing one-shot scenes anymore, even though I used to write them all the time. So I may write several fills and make sure I know how they go together before I start posting. If you're ever curious whether I got your prompt, or what the status is, feel free to ask and I'll check. ❤️

#prompt requests #tangential tuesday