michael and calum hitting the woah aged me
Calum straight up got the hand sanitizer out 😂
rating: mostly pg content
word count: 4.1k
featuring: calum & michael, estranged bestfriend!soulmates, supernatural power outtages, celine dion songs, hazy college memories, angst angst angst, forgetting your phone at soccer camp, annoying ginger girlfriends, and lots of moonlight
a/n: hello! this is the first fic i’ve written since 2015 BUT i started it before all this end of the world stuff and now it seems exceptionally topical. this is a normal person au with a hint of supernatural blackout. thank you to @5sosnsfw for beta reading and being a big inspiration always <3
(it would mean the world to me if u read this bad boy, i’ve been workin on it for too long <3. also don’t be afraid to tell me what u think—good or bad)
The blackout started at 3:08 in the afternoon. On a Thursday in early February to be specific. There’d been no prior indication of an electrical failure. No malfunctioning outlets, or staticky signals, or even the premonition of a blip. But, just like that, the entire Los Angeles electrical grid wiped itself clean.
It all happened in fifteen minutes. First, the towers sparked. Quick hot bursts of voltage danced haphazardly along wires, frightening birds enough to scorch both talon and feather. Commuters on the highway noticed, craning their necks through open car windows as the dangerous trails of blue traveled toward the city center. Pedestrians on foot stopped mid sidewalk, simply to stare before the powerlessness rippled outward. Gone was artificial light and sound, stunning the entire metropolitan area into silence.
At 3:08 p.m., on this particular Thursday in February, Calum Hood was home. Home on his couch, in his underwear, watching old reruns of Law and Order: SVU to be specific. Thursdays were his day off. Not only from work, but from casual conversation, from social interaction, from anything outside of his little LA apartment cocoon. Rarely did Calum even reach for his phone. On Thursdays, it remained leashed to the outlet next to his bedside table. However, when the TV screen flatlined to black in the middle of an Olivia Benson breakthrough, he regretfully sought his phone for an explanation.
So Lauren and myself are talking and we are bored because of lockdown so we want to bring our fanfiction writing back - we used to write on Wattpad from like 2014 to 2018 and have a decent (I think) amount of reads.
But, do people still use Wattpad now??? Would we be better off writing on here??? We are like 20 now, idk what you kids are doing but I WANNA WRITE AGAIN! Lockdown got me on a mad one, someone PLZ advise on what we do!
Ok buckle in babies, we’re making a ship list. (Part 1)
(I don’t know why I’m making this other than the idea gave me dopamine and I like gay shit.)
Basically I’m gonna be going through each ship and going through the realness, the type of relationship they have, whose top and whose bottom, and overall how much they hype each other (in interviews, on twitter, on live-streams. You name it.) Then I’ll be grading them on a scale of 1 to 10.
Now first a disclaimer: I’m making this ship list is based solely on my opinions, the evidence I’ve seen, and what the tarot cards have told me. And even though it’s fact in my mind doesn’t mean it’s fact for real. So honestly just enjoy them cause we’re in for a wild ride. Feelin good?
Good. Let’s go alphabetically shall we?
Cake is a great ship. I think it’s one of the more plausible ships in 5sos cause you better believe giggly baby boy Luke loves him some Calum. I think this relationship is actually just a booty call though. Like Luke and Calum are friends with benefits, I have no doubt about it.
Look at that.
So needless to say the top and the bottom are pretty obvious. Luke being a bottom, and Calum being the top. Take one good look at both of them together at /any age and tell me I’m wrong. Calum could beat the shit out of Luke anytime. It just helped when he got muscles.
Luke was trying to get dicked down in this live stream, and the one before that. Fr. Quarantine’s got this boy going crazy. And generally on twitter they’re flirty. And Calum Luke’s to roast Luke a LOT.
Final review of Cake: 7/10
An unbreakable bond. The best of friends. Two sides of the same chaotic coin. They’re as real as it comes. If Ashton does something, Calum’s there. You cannot separate them. And why would you want to?
Now I don’t think that Cashton fucks, let’s be completely honest. Who the hell would top? I feel like Calum is more likely to bottom than Ashton, but he’s not likely to bottom with Ashton. They’d fight over it. Physically. Full brawl beatdown. So no drunk hookups for them. But I feel like they probably do send porn to each other, smfh. They’re chaotic.
They hype each other up all the time. As best friends do. They wrote a fucking song about their friendship sober, and then another one drunk. Ashton has now been seen writing Calum fanfiction, it’s done. They’re inseparable. Name a more iconic duo.
Final review of Cashton 8/10
Ok I know. I’m a bit biased on this one… it is my handle, but, it’s my handle for good reason. I mean where should you even start with these two? I mean obviously they’re real. Obviously they’re real. If you choose an interview—any interview—and focus on either one of them, they’re likely looking at each other. Like they’re the kings of staring at each other when they shouldn’t be. Get a fuckin room already, damn.
You don’t have to watch him all the time buddy. He’s not gonna disappear. And not to mention everytime they’re beside each other, THEYRE
Like there is so much more, this is just a basic search through commonly used gifs.
So I’ve seen a lot of discrepancies between who tops and who bottoms, and you can’t tell me that Luke could ever top Ashton. I’m sorry, but I’ve seen the outline of Luke’s dick in leather pants, and to think he tops anyone is a stretch. But Ashton? No. Ashton tops.
Maybe he was verse way back in the day? But after he got muscles and started wearing bandanas? The days of bottom!ash were done. I’m really sorry guys. I hate to do it to you. But Luke is a soft boy who likes being picked up, and Ashton likes caring for Luke too much to be his sub.
Speaking of care, Ashton could write a dissertation sized paper on how much he loves Luke. He would go on about it. And has. Numerous times. He always tries to boost Luke’s confidence, and sometimes roasts him as well. Tell me that’s not boyfriend moves right there. And it’s constant. Ashton is in love with Luke. And that’s the point.
Final review of Lashton: 10/10
Ok that’s part 1. And I’m only breaking it up, cause there’s only 10 images per post. What a fuckin rip off. Anyway, part 2 soon and we’ll go into the three M’s cause Mikey deserves love and his own post.
I feel sad, & I feel stupid for feeling sad cuz I’m sure no1 thinks it makes sense-also I’m overly sensitive so that doesn’t help
Anyway, I thought 5SOS was still gonna sell the individual covers when the album was out, not just pre-sell them signed & online…so now I can’t get an individual cover & it honestly makes me sad cuz I feel like I missed my chance not figuring out some way to buy an individual album cover…it’s mainly though that I have Michael’s cover for SGFG, Luke’s cover for Youngblood, & now I wanted Calum’s cover for CALM (obviously I planned on getting Ashton’s cover for album 5)
so yeah, had to rant a little bcuz I’m feeling sad/disappointed enough to wanna cry & I sound so stupid that I can’t rant anywhere else😐
Anonymously send me kinks and I’ll tell you if I’m into them or not!
are there any prompt challenges?? i need smthin to get the juices truly flowing :(
What should I do next? Part three bisexual Malum smut or a Calum smut/angst one shot?????
We all died when Calum put on this filter, let’s be honest.
calum: *leaves for 5 seconds*
michael: I AM A PICKLE
Some Malum from tonight’s livestream of CALM
MICHAEL JUST LEFT CALUM HANGING IM DYING