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rivensoerthe · 9 months

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Close Reading - Ancient Dreams In A Modern Land

MARINA's Ancient Dreams In A Modern Land continues on an empowering route for her of making the music she wants to make. After three albums aimed, to varying degrees, at securing traditional fame and success, ADIAML is a continuation of her rebirth, where she dropped "and the Diamonds" and decided that this work was for her.

Ancient Dreams in a Modern Land

This is such a powerful way to open the album. To me, it planted really powerful seeds to center that I am the product of sooooo much evolution and in the process me, and those around me, stand at the apex of human capacity and ability. It simultaneously acknowledges the power of the present while also paying homage to the work and ambition of the past. Furthermore, it alludes to lost wisdom from ancient eras that it is incumbent upon us to return to.

You don't have to be like everybody else You don't have to fit into the norm You are not here to conform I am here to take a look inside myself Recognize that I could be the eye, the eye of the storm I am not my body, not my mind or my brain (ha) Not my thoughts or feelings, I am not my DNA I am the observer, I'm a witness of life I live in the space between the stars and the sky

The emphasis on breaking from conformity within it all also gets at a very important idea: enlightenment cannot be found on the beaten path. It requires self-reflection and an awareness of/deviation from patterns.

Venus Fly Trap

Venus Fly Trap is her reminder to us that she could be making more commercially popular music, easily. Electra Heart was majorly successful and she could've gone down that road. Big pop producers were fucking with her. But she tells us she says!!!

Don't underestimate me 'Cause one day you're gonna see you're in a losing battle Babe, you'll never stop me being me I got the beauty, got the brains Got the power, hold the reins I should be motherfuckin' crazy Nothing in this world could change me

It continues on this path of emphasizing "I am not here to be commercially popular!!! I am going to stay here and do my own fuckin thing and if y'all come great but if not I really don't care lol I already gamed this shit and got enough money to live the rest of my life just fine."

Man's World

Man's World, the lead single. Sets the tone for the broader spirit of the album: analyzing the structures that have restricted our thinking and calling them out. It's accessible: we all know the patriarchy is fucked up, we all (as MARINA listeners) also know that climate change is a problem.

It's also optimistic while being delightfully ominous.

Spring appears when the time is right Women are violets coming to light Don't underestimate the making of life The planet has a funny way of stopping a fight

This life can be disorienting, but playing on spiritual principles of balance she provides an understandably anxious audience solace and empowerment.

Purge the Poison

Right out the gate she's talking about witchcraft, finding empowerment in her ability to make an impact, and analyzing how we have created so much of the damage around us. She is also saying, quite candidly, that there's a lot of toxic institutions in our way but that has always been the case. However, she also reminds us of the work we've successfully done to fight these instutitions.

2007 when size zero was the rage Britney shaved her head and All we did was call her crazed Harvey Weinstein, gone to jail Me Too went on to unveil Truth and all its glory The ending of a story It's a new world order, everything just falls away Our life as we knew it now belongs to yesterday Inside all the love and hate we can now regenerate Stopped how we'd been living every single day

The appeal to 2007 and all of its horrors is used in a peculiar way as a comfort. Like, look how far we've come in a little over a decade. Look how powerful we are at creating a just world. Change is coming!!!

Highly Emotional People

Highly. Emotional. People. This is the break. The first three songs are so empowering about change, but this is where she strips down and acknowledges how overwhelming she finds this world.

She takes the universe's eye here:

The universe hangs like a necklace from God Jewels suspended in the cosmos And it makes me believe This is how we're meant to be 'Cause we're just highly emotional people And you don't need to hide Sometimes it's hard to tell me how you feel I never see you cry

She flips the messaging on its head. After talking all her shit, rightfully so, about how impactful humans can be, she goes back and acknowledges how daunting it is for us to feel small. She tells us it's okay to feel small. She creates safety.

She also flips Man's World on its head: the unenlightened will be like blah blah she's a misogynist blah blah. But she candidly calls out the male suicide rate and unpacks how men are really the first victims of toxic masculinity.

New America

Admittedly my least favorite. Idk why it did feel corny to me when it came out and in retrospect I do think she made some points but it's also just like soooo on the nose and i think she could stand to be a bit more abstract here.

With that said I mean she didn't lie in a lot of it. I think this is one of the instances where i do disagree with her cuz she talks her shit about GMOs and its like idk girl that's rlly helped us fight food scarcity. But like we're allowed to disagree!

And I don't hate the song rlly. I mean I think there's something powerful to the idea of an American reckoning and a blatant call out of American hypocrisy. I just also think her fanbase already kind of knows this tea so it's one of those things where it's like "I mean yeah true but you're not really inspiring me here....."

But you know what a lot of them prob found validation and further explication of what they knew in this song so let's celebrate that!!!

Pandora's Box

Part two of the album. Heartbreak songs. A friend once complained about this to me, they were like she was really cooking with broader social commentary and now here she goes talking her shit about her ex boyfriend and it feels petty.

But like, this is really just a switch from the macro to the micro. Our relationships teach us so much about ourselves and how the world should work vs. does work.

In this specific case, it's her admission of her partner's adultery. And an acknowledgement of how, for someone with her mind, this was earth shattering in terms of maintaining her trust with someone who she had let in in the most intimate ways. It's about heartbreak and betrayal when you are a highly emotional person. It also alludes to the dangers of trying to heal others to the point where you sacrifice your own well-being. You have to make sure your cup is full first and others get the overflow!!!

I Love You, But I Love Me More

She alluded to how her partner "almost turned her psycho," and this is the response to that. When Marina gets upset, she leans into this ominous character. A character who draws boundaries through appealing to her ego/self-love.

It's also a rejection of the toxic pattern she had found herself in. He failed her, and she wants to heal dude but refuses to choose healing dude over herself.

Flowers

As we know healing isn't linear!!! At this point she properly resolves to breakup with her boyfriend.

I think it made me stronger But I would rather not Betray myself, just to keep your love at any cost And it's most tempting to give in When you hear the firin' shots When you are steps from winning back All the happiness you lost, lost Lost, lost With every careless action you let me slip away If you just bought me flowers, maybe I would've stayed You didn't think I was serious, I guess you felt so safe If you just bought me flowers, maybe I would've stayed

This is her going back to big picture Marina; there has been a whole relationship here where dude had the opportunity to prove himself and he repeatedly failed. And she cultivated the shit out of this garden but it just didn't fucking work.

And yes! She really almost didn't turn away, but she reminded herself of this broader pattern and how much it hurt her and she walked away.

Oh and a final note, there is something sad to the fact that she wanted to be there for him and knew there were things that were fake about him but was invested nonetheless, and he self-sabotaged. RIP

Goodbye

The actual breakup song. it's cordial, it's grateful, it's gentle. It's sad, it's grieving. But it's also optimistic. It acknowledges where her faults allowed this dynamic to get as toxic as it did. At the center of it is her relationship with being a healer.

I've been a mother to everyone else To every motherfucker except myself And I don't even have any kids

She's putting herself first!!! Like it's that simple. She's drawing boundaries for her own protection.

#marina #marina and the diamonds #ancient dreams in a modern land #music #goodbye #flowers #i love you but i love me more #pandora's box #new america #highly emotional people #purge the poison #man's world #Spotify

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sgkophie · 2 years

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Man's World - An Epilogue

Previous Chapter (finale!) is HERE.

Pairing: Carlos Sainz x Reader, Carlos Sainz x You, Carlos Sainz x OFC

Warnings: language, fluff

AN: LOVE how this chapter turned out. We have laughs, we have pranks, we have tears... we have Georgia being a lion. What’s not to love?

IMPORTANT: If you want to keep seeing my content, including upcoming one-shots of Man's World that I have planned, please visit your "content you see" section and toggle your "sexual themes" to show. More on that HERE. You can access those settings by clicking this link.

Tag List: Want to join the tag list? Fill out this little form or drop me a comment below!

Word Count: 6700

Check out the full intro synopsis + full story master list here!

Abu Dhabi – Wednesday – Georgia POV

“Carlos, have you seen my pass?” I frantically started emptying my suitcase, desperately looking for my paddock pass. Good grief, Georgia, you can’t lose this pass yet again, you’ll never hear the end of it from Lando, I muttered to myself.

“Mi amor, you’d lose your head if it wasn’t screwed on,” I heard Carlos laugh from behind me, wrapping his arms around me from behind, my paddock pass in his hand.

“Oh, thank god! After I blasted Lando on twitter in Austin for losing his pass and getting caught trying to break into the paddock, I couldn’t lose mine this week!”

“Well, to be fair love, you probably shouldn’t have told the police that he was an intruder…” I laughed at that. Lando and I had been in a prank war for a few years now, and while we’d called a “truce” after Silverstone, we both knew that wasn’t going to last long. As soon as I saw Lando trying to break his way into the paddock with no pass around his neck, it was too good not to tell security that some random fan was trying to break in.

The fact that the American security guards didn’t recognize him was even more hilarious.

Unfortunately for me, Lando returned the favor the following week when he “accidentally” told Charles that Carlos and I were secretly engaged and planning to elope over Christmas. I think if Carlos hadn’t been in a sponsorship meeting, Charles would have actually punched his teammate. But noow it was my turn to get one over on the Brit, and I had a beautiful prank in place.

“So, we’re still on for today, right?” I asked, wiggling my eyebrows in anticipation. I had finally talked my boyfriend into helping me prank Lando, and I couldn’t be more excited.

“I feel like this is too mean, mi amor,” Carlos said with a sigh. Over the last several months I had learned just how much of a softie Carlos was, especially for Lando. “I think if we actually broke up, Lando would be the only person on the planet as devastated as me.”

I rolled my eyes at Carlos, grabbing my bag from the sofa as we headed downstairs, meeting Lily in the lobby; we’d agreed to have a quick breakfast with her before we left for the paddock. For whatever reason, Lily had become a staple to Carlos and I’s driving to the paddock. For a while Charles would also join us, but after summer break, Charles went back to driving himself to the paddock.

Something felt off between Lily and Charles. It felt like they were avoiding each other, and by Austin GP, they were actively making excuses to leave the room when the other walked in, a staunch change from the beginning of the season, when I would watch them subtly flirt with each other.

Once breakfast was finished, I turned to my teammate, a smile on my lips. “Ready to go?” The Valet pulled up my Bugatti and the two of us hopped into the car.

“Carlos not joining us?”

“Nah, he’s got a different schedule than us,” I mused, taking off away from the hotel. I felt a little bad not telling Lily about Carlos and I’s prank, but I knew she wouldn’t be able to keep the prank a secret from Lando.

“So, tell me, what’s going on with you and Charles?” I could see Lily visibly stiffen up at the mention of my brother’s name, although she kept a stoic look on her face.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, nothing really… just felt like the two of you have been avoiding each other.”

“Nope, just busy that’s all. Can’t just drop everything for Charles Leclerc.” It’s as if Lily knew her words had come out harsher than she expected, so she added with a smile, “can only put up with one of the Leclerc twins this season.”

“Fine, keep your secrets, Wilson.” I could see from Lily’s face that she wanted to say something else, but had decided against it, instead opting to scroll through her phone. phone.

“So, the Netflix special went over well! Fans are just loving you and Carlos,” she mused.

“Yeah, I feel like it put the final nail in the coffin of that Daily Mail article. We haven’t had a single bad article about our relationship written in over a month, thank god.” The Netflix special, along with a second Vogue article, had been a lifesaver for Carlos and I. After I admitted I loved him over the radio, there was some renewed suspicions about us. Fortunately the FIA investigation was cleared by Monza and by Singapore, the news was basically dead – everyone having moved on to the F1 silly season.

“Well, after you win the championship this weekend, there won’t be a single bad thing the press can say. They’ll have to accept us with a female World Drivers Champion.”

“Cheers to that,” I replied, holding up my coffee cup and clinking it with hers.

Carlos POV

I felt a little bad pranking Lando, but after he told Charles that Georgia and I were secretly engaged, I had let Georgia talk me into this silly idea of hers. Pretty sure I would have been sporting a black eye for a week if Lewis hadn’t caught wind of their conversation and ran to the Ferrari garage to calm Charles down.

Charles was less than impressed about the prank, although I knew Georgia reveled in the challenge of one-upping Lando. It was one of the many reasons I loved her – she never backed down from a challenge, and Lando had just opened pandora’s box of pranks.

As soon as I walked into the paddock, I saw Lando waiting for me outside of the Ferrari hospitality suite. We had agreed to do a track walk together, get some time to catch up just the two of us.

“Morning, Carlos!” I smiled at Lando, gladly taking the cup of coffee he held out for me, my second one of the morning. Best part about dating Georgia Leclerc? The incredible coffee.

“Morning, Lando. How are things?”

“Oh you know, can’t complain. Quadrant’s podcast is really taking off, it’s taking a lot of my time, but I don’t mind. How are things with you and the misses?” I froze up a bit at his asking, trying to think through all of the coaching Georgia had given me. Her dedication to her craft (of being a prankster) was nothing short of impressive. After this weekend Georgia might F1’s first female World Drivers Champion, but I’m pretty sure Georgia would consider herself the World Champion of Pranks, too – and she might be prouder of that title than the former.

“Yeah… umm, sort of the reason I wanted to ask you to get coffee with me…” I knew that had piqued Lando’s interest; he immediately stopped in his tracks, looking directly into my eyes, concern already laced in his face.

God, Lando, what a good friend.

“Georgia and I… we decided to take some time apart during the winter break.” I knew the words were as fake as Georgia and I’s relationship had started, but damn they hurt me to even say them out loud. I said a silent prayer to the universe, begging her to not let this ever be true.

“WHAT!?” Lando screamed, spilling some of his coffee on his McLaren team polo. “Absolutely not. I forbid it.” Lando’s reaction took everything within me not to laugh; he looked as if he’d make a deal with the devil himself in order to make this statement not true. “What did you do?”

“What do you mean ‘what did I do?’” I was slightly offended that Lando had gone straight for me, assuming that I was the one who fucked up. It was logical, but still hurtful from my best friend.

“Look, mate, I’m just trying to get to the bottom of this so we can fix this.”

“She just needs a little space, it’s been an overwhelming season.” As we came to the close of our track walk, Lando walked me back to the Ferrari garage.

“Never fear, Carlos – I’m going to fix this.” Lando’s voice was full of conviction and I let out a small smile.

“Lando, I told you NOT to get involved. Promise me you won’t say anything.”

“Fine, fine…” Lando put his hands up int he air, admitting defeat, which was good because I didn’t need this prank spreading around the paddock; we’d finally gotten out of the dog house with the press; I didn’t need a fake prank circulating around the paddock like wildfire.

Lando POV

As soon as I watched Carlos walk into the Ferrari garage, I immediately texted Lily and Daniel, demanding that they both meet me in my drivers room. I couldn’t believe what Carlos had told me; those two were made for each other, but I knew if anyone would have insight, it would be Danny and Lily.

Me: Lil, Danny – meet me in 15, my drivers room, super urgent

Queen Lily: Lando some of us have actual meetings and strategy to go over…

Me: No time for that, Lil… our friends are in trouble

Queen Lily: Fine, be there in 20

Once Lily and Daniel entered my drivers’ room, I shut the door – motioning for them both to take a seat on my coach.

“Alright, what I am about to tell you cannot leave this room.” Lily and Daniel both gave me a thumbs up and an eye roll – although that I chose to ignore the latter. “Carlos and Georgia are taking a break.”

Silence engulfed my driver’s room as the two other drivers sat there, contemplating my words.

“Lando, that’s a pile pf horse shit,” Lily finally scoffed. “Is this another one of your pranks again, cause I’m not falling for it.”

“No, I’m serious, Carlos told me this morning on our track walk.” Daniel shifted in his seat, eyeing my warily.

“Are you sure you understood right? I mean, Georgia and I literally just went apartment shopping for the two of them in Monaco this weekend.” I started to feel more frustrated as Danny’s face looked entirely unconvinced.

“And I just had breakfast with them this morning…” Lily added.

I just stared at my teammate and friend for a moment, before it dawned on me – those fuckers were trying to prank me. This is why Carlos didn’t want me getting involved; he knew his terrible, poorly thought out prank would be exposed.

No, I shouldn’t blame Carlos on this one. It had Georgia Sassy Leclerc all over it.

“Those sneaky little bastards!” Lily and Daniel looked taken aback, not having caught on to what I had just realized. “They’re trying to prank me!”

“Well, I’d say you have it coming considering you told Charles that his sister was secretly engaged…” Daniel let out a laugh at that one. It probably wasn’t one of my finer pranks, but Georgia’s horror when she realized her brother was about to go beat up her boyfriend was hilarious – the look on Charles’s face? That was the icing on top.

“I only did that because Georgia almost had me arrested!”

“Well, have you ever forgotten your paddock pass again?” I rolled my eyes at Lily’s snarky comment; I knew she loved that prank a little too much. “Sounds like you learned your lesson.” She stuck her tongue out at me and I flicked her off, not amused with her response. As the season went on, I had begun to realize that Lily was actually the sassy one of the pair, her sarcastic British humor had really blossomed at Bugatti.

“Well, two can play at this game! They don’t know that I know that they’re trying to prank me… and you’re NOT going to tell them.”

“Lando, do not involve me in your little prank wars with Georgia. I am not about to start WWIII in the Bugatti garage,” Lily responded, slowly getting up from the couch. Danny laughed as well and excused himself, insisting that he didn’t want to know what we had planned. Something about undeniability being the best course of action for him.

“What!? No! Come on… Lando and Lily scheming again, we’re so good at it!”

“What can you even do on such short notice?”

“Oh, Lily… I am so glad you asked.”

Georgia POV – Friday Press Conference

After both free practice sessions, the FIA had scheduled an extra press conference for Max and I. Only a few points separated us in the championship, and I knew the FIA loved the drama, although Max and I had agreed to keep the drama on the track only, neither of us giving in to the demand that we brow beat the other out of existence. I might have been sassy to the reporters, but I’d never badmouth another driver at a press conference – ever.

As I sat down in the chair next to Max, he leaned in to me. “I hear congratulations are in order,” Max chuckled.

“Congratulating me for winning the championship already? Interesting approach, Verstappen,” I laughed, although my laughter was short lived when I saw the look of confusion on Max’s face.

“Sorry, Georgia, I get it if you aren’t telling people yet. Lando has such a big mouth, just wanted to say congrats.” Before I could give a follow up comment, the press started the press conference, diving straight into questions about the upcoming race.

******

As soon as the press conference was over, I pulled out my phone, only to see a text from Charles.

Charles: Care to explain why Carlos had a look of panic on his face during the Ferrari strategy meeting today?

Me: scared he’s going to see my rear bumper the entire race? ;-)

Charles: I’m serious, Peaches…

Me: Did he say something to you?

Charles: no, he was just… not himself. I asked what was wrong, thought you might know. He looked pale…

Me: Thanks for letting me know.

After another round in the media pen I was finally released back to the hotel so I could get some sleep in before qualifying tomorrow. When I walked into our shared room, Carlos was nowhere to be found. Instead, there was a note on the living room coffee table explaining that he’d be back later and not to wait up for him. There had been some damage to his car after free practice, so I figured he would be at the garage, trying to help with the repairs.

I waited up for him, but after room service I soon found myself asleep in our bed. When I awake the next morning at 7am, I turned over to see Carlos’ side of the bed empty. I immediately felt some panic setting into me. What if something had happened to him?

As I grabbed my phone, about to text everyone I knew in panic, I saw a text from Coco letting me know that Carlos was safe and had fallen asleep on his couch. I smiled at that – classic Carlos, he was always falling asleep on the couch. Coco informed me that he’d just take Carlos to the track that morning since he had gone to bed so late.

I was disappointed that I wasn’t able to see Carlos before qualifying, and slightly annoyed that he had only texted me good luck. I had the sneaking suspicion that he was avoiding me, but I pushed those thoughts to the back of my mind, remembering our “exercise” that had taken place Thursday night. I knew he was stressed about the last race of the season; I’d see him after qualifying.

****

“Alright GG, Q3 is about to begin. You ready to take your final pole of the season.” I chucked at Mel’s radio message. I was more than ready.

I was the first one out into Q3, which was nice because I was able to get an early flying lap in with my new softs. I was able to improve on my Q2 lap time, and as the track evolution began to quicken, I made an improvement on my second lap in Q3.

“Right, GG – this is the last lap for you.” I made my way across the line with just 5 seconds to spare before the end of Q3. “Head down, GG.”

It was as if the universe had decided to offer me a small slice of forgiveness for all of the times it stuck me in an elevator with journalists, sponsors, other drivers. For once, things were on my side.

“FUCK YES!” I heard Mel scream into my ear. “Georgia Pole Leclerc, you did it again! That’s you P1, Max P2. One step closer to the WDC.”

“WAHOOOOOOOO!” I screamed back at Mel. “Let’s bring it home, ladies!”

As soon as I arrived back at the pitlane, I was greeted by my team who had all come out to congratulate me. Lily had gotten P4, a solid position for the team, with Charles in P3 and Carlos in P5. Max immediately ran over and shook my hand, congratulating me on pole position, but promising to destroy me tomorrow, causing me to laugh.

“Guess I better destroy you this season, since I won’t get the chance next season,” he laughed. Before I could respond to his weird comment, I saw Carlos waving me to me over by the Bugatti garage, motioning for me to come over. Once I entered my drivers room, I was immediately brought into a huge hub by my boyfriend.

“Congrats,” he said, picking me up gently and kissing me on the lips. “I’m so proud of you.”

“Thank you, mon amour. I was sad I missed you this morning, bed felt empty without you.” Carlos looked a little guilty, and he shifted his weight from side to side for a bit, clearly unsure of what to say. He grabbed my hands and pulled me into his lap on my couch.

“I’m sorry, cariño. I should have been there. I just panicked for a moment, but I’m going to be here for you, for the both of you.” Carlos rested his hand on my lower stomach, his gaze looking up at me with the most loving stare I think I had ever seen from the man. I paused for a moment, at first reveling in the loving look, before processing what he had actually said.

“Um… what!?”

“For you and the baby?”

“What baby? Who the fuck is having a baby?” Carlos was now looking confused, giving me a questioning look.

“Lando sai-.” Before Carlos could finish his sentence, I interrupted him, immediately jumping off his lap and sprinting towards my door, flinging the door open with such ferocity a team photo fell down in the outside hallway,

“I’m going to kill him!” Fortunately, I didn’t have to go too far to find Lando. As I turned the corner, I heard the laughing of Lando in Lily’s drivers room. I burst into the room, not even bothering to knock.

“Lando did you tell people I am pregnant!”

“I don’t know, did you tell Carlos to tell me that you had broken up!” I immediately stopped in my tracks. Of course Lando had found out. “Maybe next time you might want to sure up your lie a little better…” Lily let out a chuckle; I could see from the look on her face that she had spilled the beans to Lando. Knew I should have included her.

“Et tu, brute?” I said to Lily, letting a small grin creep onto my face. Lando had bested me on this one, and I couldn’t even be mad about it. As I turned around to look at Carlos, I saw a smile creep over on his face. So they had all planned this.

“Well, well, well, it might have been a joke that Carlos and I were taking a break… but maybe now it’ll be true!” I had wanted the words to come out fierce and determined – angry – but I couldn’t help but let a laugh escape my lips. I was impressed, and I recognized greatness when I saw it.

Takes one to know one.

“Fine, this makes us even for pranks this weekend, Lando, but you had better watch out next year.”

“Wouldn’t have it any other way, Leclerc!”

I gave Lando and Lily my middle finger and then exited her drivers room, returning back to my own room, still laughing at their prank. It had been a good one, and fortunately they managed not to include my brother, less we have another Singapore incident. As Carlos entered the room after me, he pulled me in closer, capturing my lips in a kiss.

“So, why were you avoiding me on Friday?” I made sure to make my disdain known, hoping Carlos got the hint that I was annoyed about him abandoning me Friday evening.

“Oh, cariño, don’t be upset with me,” Carlos chuckled, giving me another kiss on the lips as he pulled me back into his lap. “What Coco said was true, we were up so late working on the car that I crashed on Friday… I had to stay and help the team rebuild. I didn’t want to wake you, so I stayed with him. I know how focused you get before races, and I meant what I said – I’m not going to jeopardize this win for you.”

I smiled at Carlos’ words, knowing a blush was creeping onto my face. We spent the next ten minutes chatting, before Lizzie came over to my room, letting me know that the post qualifying press conference would begin soon. As I made my way to the door, Carlos grabbed my land one last time, pulling me into him.

“I know that was a prank, cariño, but I just wanted to let you know that someday, I can’t wait until its true.” Carlos’ admission made my heart melt. Had Carlos thought about our future together that deeply?

“Me too, mon amour, me too.”

Georgia Leclerc POV – Race Day

Yesterday, after Lando had admitted that he had ‘let it slip’ that Carlos and I were pregnant to the other drivers, I promptly texted them all to let them know what an ass Lando was. –

no one was surprised. Max, apparently, was also in on the joke, which made his comments make considerably more sense. The majority of them had found it to be hilarious – although Lewis and Seb made it quite known that they were quietly pleased it wasn’t true, the two of them implying that it was too early for Carlos and I to have babies, especially before I “crushed the other drivers out of existence”. Seb definitely had a way with words.

Lewis: Good luck today, Georgie. Whatever happens – I am so proud of you. You deserve this win.

Me: Thanks, Lew. Couldn’t have done it without your support!

Lewis: Nah… this one’s on you, Georgie. All you xx

I smiled at Lewis’ texts. If things went well today, I would be crowned the first female F1 champion. Isabelle had called the entire team into the paddock early, nothing was going to be left to chance. There was more than my WDC on the line, more than the constructor’s championship.

As I piled into the conference room which was now full of the entire Bugatti garage staff, Isabelle stood up on the step stool that had been laid out for her, allowing her to be seen by the entire team.

“Good morning, everyone. I know I have called you all in here early, but I think we can all guess why.” Isabelle took a moment to pause as everyone chuckled, most of them turning to me. I had never felt awkward with the team before, but standing here now, I suddenly felt the pressure of the spotlight. The looks in their eyes showed the same desire, the same want that I felt. We were in this together – as a team, and yet, I recognized the huge role I had to play in this today. For 58 laps I had to drive better than Monaco, better than Silverstone.

I had to drive like I had a point to prove.

“I just wanted to say, before we all disperse for the season, that it has been an honor to have you all on the Bugatti F1 team. Even if the result isn’t what we want it to be, we have had a hell of a season and regardless of what happens today, I am so incredibly proud of this season. Everyone thought we would be last in the constructor’s championship, and here we are, currently sitting in the top spot. We gave them hell, ladies, and for that – we should be proud.”

As Isabelle finished the speech, I felt a tear drop down my face, causing Lily to turn to me; I gave her my middle finger as she laughed and pointed at me, sticking her tongue out back in return.

The time between the morning meeting and the race start felt like an eternity, but when Mel told me it was time to get into the car, I felt frozen in place. This was it, the last time in 2022 that I was going to get into that car; my moment to show everyone who Georgia Leclerc was.

“You got this, GG,” Mel called into the radio as I settled into the cockpit. “Let’s bring another one home.”

As the formation lap ended, I looked over to Max who was in P2. I couldn’t see his face, but I could picture the determination on it. He wanted the WDC as much as I did, and he wasn’t going to let me have this easy.

“And it’s lights out and away we go!”

As soon as the five lights went, I launched the car into the first corner, making sure to defend from Max who had decided to already be aggressive on his overtaking strategy.

So, its gloves off then is it, Max?

“Careful on tyres, GG.” I knew Mel wanted these to last, but like hell was I going to let Max Verstappen overtake me in the beginning of this race. As the race trudged on to lap 35, I was still leading the pack. Max and I had broken away from the group; he’d managed to stay within 4 seconds behind me, just waiting for me to mess up – waiting for me to do a little spin or cross a curb too early, anything to get within DRS of me.

“Yellow flag, accident close to pit entrance.”

As soon as I saw the symbol on my steering wheel I slowed down to the appropriate speed, letting the safety car guide me for several laps. Max and I had both just pitted, so neither of us wanted to lose track position for a second pit – even if it was a “free stop” as Mel always liked to tell me.

Doesn’t feel free if I have to lose P1, I reminded her.

“Restart will be behind safety car, get ready to push, Max will be right behind you.”

Of course he was. Just my luck to get a safety car. Unfortunately for me, my luck was continuing to get worse. As soon as the notification was lit green, I saw Max Verstappen fly past me, getting much better traction on his tyres as his RedBull car flew by.

“Fuck!” I screamed into the radio; Mel said nothing back to me, clearly assessing the situation from the pit wall.

Lap 42 rolled around, and I was still stuck behind Max. No doubt I would have nightmares about his rear wing for the next several years. I was within DRS for several laps, but each time I made a move, Max was able to defend and elude me, no doubt using his tyres to exhaustion – although I was quickly getting into the same sinking boat.

“Relax on tyres, GG. We think Max’s will give out before yours right now, keep diligent.”

As soon as lap 53 rolled around, I could feel my heart start to quicken, fear seeping into me. I was running out of time to turn this around – and quickly, trying to balance the tyres while not staying to far behind Max.

As soon as I began lap 55, I heard Isabelle come onto the radio.

“GG, fuck the tyres. Go for it.” I’m sorry, did Isabelle just come onto my radio and curse into my ear? I felt stunned at first, but as her words sank into me, I knew she was right. What was the point of nursing these tyres? I wasn’t going to get past Max if I didn’t push harder, so we might as well risk the puncture. I didn’t want to be on the podium in the second step.

I wanted to be on the top one.

Isabelle didn’t have to come back onto the radio to tell me twice. As soon as lap 56 rolled around, I absolutely floored it down the straight, getting within .2 of a second to Max, our cars almost touching because I had launched so hard into the straight. As soon as he second DRS zone rolled around, I knew I would have him.

And have him I did.

As the DRS flap opened, I cruised by Max’s car, quickly getting in front of him. If there was ever a time to defend, I knew it was now.

Lap 57 flew by, and I was still in first.

“Final lap, GG.”

I crossed the line for lap 58, hitting the racing line with such ease I almost didn’t recognize myself. Max had fallen back to 1.2 seconds so I was safe from DRS in the first zone. As I reached the second, I knew Max was within the one second requirement. I lunged my car in front of his, blocking his attach with such ferocity, I barely knew myself. Was it a tad more dangerous than my mother would like to see? Probably.

As I saw the checkered flag in front of me, I did what someone could also describe as ‘sending it’. It was as if in that moment nothing else mattered. Not Max, not the journalists, not even the team’s expectations of me. Everything was gone, blank in my mind. The only thing occupying my brain was the checkered flag in front of me.

As I crossed the finish line, I felt it. My tyre had gotten a puncture, but for the first time in my racing career, it didn’t matter. I had crossed the line.

It was as if time had stopped – as if my brain had stopped working as I tried to utter something into my radio. I heard someone yell into the feed, but the words were fuzzy – confusing, not registering in my brain. Nothing in that moment was registering in my brain.

“Wh…what was th- that?” was all I could utter back into my radio, as I heard distant screaming and cheering through the radio, the sound of the crowd roaring so overpowering that I couldn’t hear Mel’s voice.

But my body knew what was happening; it knew what had just happened. As I heard Mel’s voice back on the radio, I felt a rush of tears run down my face; it felt as though all of the emotions that I had held in for the last year had been released. The sadness, the excitement, the fear, the ferocity that I had bottled up inside me came pouring out.

I was F1’s newest World Drivers Champion.

“CONGRATULATIONS GEORGIEEEE!” I heard Mel scream into the radio.

“Georgia, congrats. You had a hell of a season and this is a well deserved win for both you and the team. Can’t wait to do this again next year, love.” I smiled at Isabelle’s words, the softness of her voice was refreshing and new, foreign to me, but it was nice to hear. I had a sneaking suspicion she might even be smiling.

“Lily did incredible too – we had her pit and grab fastest lap to ensure that Max didn’t get it.”

“I AM SPECHLESS!” I yelled back into my radio. “Thank you to the team. This one is for you ladies… for every last one of you; thank you! Thank you to Lily for being the best teammate I could have dreamed of, an absolute star.”

I pulled into my assigned P1 spot, not even caring that the tyre was basically dead and flat at this point. I didn’t need this car anymore. She had served me well, and she had earned this retirement.

As soon as I parked I hopped out of the car, kneeling in front her, hugging the dead tyre as I felt Max come up to me, patting me on the shoulder. I stood up and faced him, and to my surprise he picked me up and swung me around in what was probably the biggest hug I had ever seen Max give.

“Congrats, Leclerc. A well-deserved win. I’ll get you next year.” Max set me down, and I was immediately grabbed by my brother, who had managed to get P3 in the race. Charles pulled off my helmet and threw it on the ground, grabbing me closer and giving me a congratulatory kiss on the cheek, grabbing my head with both his hands as he shook it.

“I am so proud of you, Peaches, so fucking proud.”

I gave my brother a huge hug as he quickly dragged the two of us off to our family who had made it to the fencing, their arms wide open for the two of us. I immediately jumped into their arms as the five of us hugged, not a single one of us wanting to let go.

My mother was the first to let go, clearly hearing the officials who were calling for Charles and I to head to the cooldown room to get weighed. I searched the crowd for Carlos, desperately looking for my boyfriend who was seemingly nowhere to be found, but just as I was about to walk into the cooldown room, I felt an arm link around my waist, pulling me to him. Carlos grabbed my head and pressed our lips together, pulling my body as close to him as he possibly could.

“I’m so proud of you, corazón. So fucking proud of you.” As I broke the kiss, I looked up and smiled at him, letting him pull me once more into another kiss as the FIA official started yelling behind us, much to the amusement of Charles and Max.

I begrudgingly let Carlos go, heading back into the cooldown room where water was waiting for me. It was only a few minutes before we were being pulled onto the podium for the celebration. I watched Charles go out first, spying my mother and brothers as he walked out. Carlos had joined them now, his phone out filming the podium celebration as he cheered us on next to my mother. Max walked out next, waving to the crowd as he took his trophy.

And then it was my turn. The moment I had been waiting for.

I walked out of the room and into the open, looking down into the masses upon masses of people who had gathered in Abu Dhabi to watch us race – to watch me win. I waved at them as I walked onto the top step, taking my trophy from the government official before setting it down so I could take my hat off for the Monaco national anthem.

As soon as the anthem finished, I picked up my bottle of champagne to spray Charles and Max, but it was too late – they had beaten me to it, absolutely drenching me and then Mel, who was the Bugatti podium representative, with their two bottles. As soon as the bubbles died down, I took one more look into the crowd, giving them one last wave before stepping off the podium.

The moment my foot hit the ground, Lily was on me – her arms wrapping around me as she picked me up into a hug, screaming the entire time. “YOU DID IT!” Lily chanted over and over again, the two of us now jumping up and down like school girls; somehow this had become our signature move.

I walked back to the garage, trophy in one hand and bottle of champagne...now in Lily’s hand. Susie Wolff was the first to pull me into a hug, but it was short lived as the rest of the garage crew started to filter over, all of them demanding hugs, everyone wanting to see the trophy. I looked around for Isabelle, my eyes scanning the garage.

Susie clearly saw my confusion because she leaned over and whispered to me, “In the office.” I nodded and made my way to Isabelle’s office, knocking on the door. As soon as I heard the words come in, I opened it slowly, looking around the dimly lit room for Isabelle.

There in the corner of her office was Isabelle, sat on her couch, a glass of what looked like whisky in her hands. There was once a point in my Bugatti career that I thought I would never see Isabelle smile, but that seemed like a farfetched idea as I observed my Team Principal in front of me, tears in her ears.

I walked over to her and set the trophy down on the coffee table, before grabbing a glass and filling it up with the whisky bottle that was set in front of her, joining her on the couch. The two of us sat in silence for several minutes, both of us sipping on our glasses, neither of us saying anything.

“You know when I was a young girl, I loved racing. Loved it dearly. I spent every weekend with my parents in Italy, karting with my brother. But as I got older… the karting got more expensive and there was only enough money for one of us to continue. Even though I was clearly more talented than my brother, my parents chose to continue funding his karting. Apparently, there was no hope I would ever be a professional driver… that just wasn’t something in the cards for a woman, so my brother, who could barely win races, got to continue living my dream as I was forced to return to normal life.” I observed Isabelle as she told the story, setting my glass down on the counter as I poured the both of us another round.

“It was that day I promised myself I was going to start an F1 team; I decided that I was going to win this championship somehow…”

“And now that we have… it almost doesn’t seem real, does it?” I finished for her. I understood what Isabelle was feeling, deep inside my soul, I understood. I had fought so long to be here, fought tooth and nail to stand on that podium and accept the WDC trophy, and now that this day had arrived, it felt almost bittersweet. The illustrious dream wasn’t so illustrious anymore.

Isabelle smiled at me, her tears drying up as she took another sip of whisky. “And now we’ve done it. Today a female-run team did more than just win the WDC, we proved to the world that women should have an equal seat at the table in F1 – from mechanics to leadership to drivers, we’re here to stay.”

“That we are, Isabelle, that we are.”

“Next year is a new year, Georgia. New car, new challenges. You ready to do it all again?”

“How many championships do I need to win to beat Lewis and Michael’s record of having the most titles? They have seven, so I need eight?” I said with a chuckle, earning me a huge grin from Isabelle.

“Hmm… perhaps we should make it nine… just to be safe,” Isabelle countered, that sneaky gleam I had come to know so well gathering in her eye.

“Well… we have one down.” I raised my glass as I stood up, clinking it with Isabelle’s. “Here’s to another eight championships, Isabelle.”

***********

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