Extremely Loud Opinions Presents: The One that Started It All
So....it's been awhile my dearest companions on my noble quest! Sorry to leave you all high and dry for a few months but my husband and I just bought a house and I've also just gotten a new job! Sadly those endeavors left little room for me to continue my quest.
However! The dust has settled and I have finished the first act of the first book in Margaret Weis and Tracy Hickman's iconic Dragonlance Chronicles Trilogy, Dragons of Autumn Twilight! And I mean...none of the covers are that tragic all things considered.
I am going to start out this review with a disclaimer because I know that Dragonlance has a ton of nostalgia value to a lot of people. My opinions are just that, opinions, and just because I may rag on the books I review doesn't mean I hate them or think they have no value. And if you think that Dragonlance is the best fantasy ever written, good for you. I am not here to change your mind or fight you on it. If it brings you the same joy that the Icewind Dale Trilogy brings me, who am I to ruin that for you?
That being said, the first act of Dragons in Autumn Twilight is...a lot. And when I say that, I also mean there is a lot to like as well as just...a lot.
The world of Krynn is DOPE AS HELL for starters. Like hot damn a world that the gods have actively forsaken and where divine magic has dwindled to the point of nonexistence? Excellent. 10/10 neat setup. Starting in medias res with a DND party that had actually broken up returning to compare notes? Wonderful. Love me a good cold open.
And then there's....everything else. Look, I know that Dragonlance paved the way for the fantasy novels of today so I'm not saying that it has no value to fantasy literature as a whole. But there is so much in this book that DID NOT AGE WELL since the 80s. Some of that adds to its charm (like literally everything that Raistlin says unironically) but some of it really casts a pall over the work (like Goldmoon, just...everything about Goldmoon).
Disclaimers aside, on to the review! I present my Extremely Loud Opinions about Act 1 of Dragons of Autumn Twilight! Spoilers Ahead!
Things I ADORE about Act 1
Like all great epic fantasy novels of the 80s, it starts with an exposition poem
There is an inn built into a living tree and that is neat!
Yaaaaasssss finally!!! A true shitty Gandalf knockoff!!! I am here for MEMES
I love the super old school art for each chapter heading
Naming someone Flint Fireforge is the equivalent of getting on a table and screaming "HEY DID YOU KNOW HE'S A DWARF???"
I find the disappearance of the Old Gods and Clerics a deeply compelling piece of lore and I want to know everything about it
So I can already tell Tasselhoff Burrfoot the rogue is going to annoy me eventually but his intro is FANTASTIC
Holy shit this party has ALL THE TROPES!!! A dwarf, a sticky fingered rogue, an angsty half elf, a himbo, and an edgelord all literally walk into a bar
Oh god, in Raistlin I see every chaotic neutral caster the RPG Horror Stories Reddit warned me about and I cannot stop laughing
Oooooooh the sole lady party member who refused to show up is Tanis the half elf's ex! JUICY
Goddammit they just gave me a barbarian princess and her hot bodyguard I AM TOO WEAK FOR THIS TROPE
This fucking Gandalf knockoff just orchestrated the single most chaotic quest reveal I have ever seen and I honestly have to applaud him for it
Eyyyy the barbarians join the party!!! Even though Goldmoon is definitely an accidental cleric and not a barbarian
I just realized a henchman has the last name of "Toede" and I'm dying
Goddammit Goldmoon and Riverwind are HECKIN CUTE
Oh shit looks like the BBEG ESCAPED A FUCKING SPACE PRISON
Tas is actually my favorite now because he's the only one who makes jokes and acts like a person
"Finally they stepped out on the road with as much fear as a troupe of unskilled actors facing a hostile audience." Is an incredible description and I'm going to steal it somehow
Riverwind has got THE SASS
Goldmoon you idiot
Holy shit dragonborn! Dragonborn cultist alert!
Tas just pulls a sword bigger than him out of a statue like it's nbd
It's so interesting to see a character in an over the top fantasy novel dealing with crippling depression and Sturm Brightblade is rapidly becoming my other favorite character. He seems to have more depth than all the other characters combined to the point where he almost feels out of place with all these cardboard cutouts. Give this man his own book pls
Thank you Raistlin for finally pointing out that it was the weird old Gandalf knockoff who got y'all into this mess
Aww Flint and Tanis actually have a really nice relationship. It's too bad they don't care about the rest of the party the same way
It's the dead warriors must perform a task they failed to find rest cliche and I love it
The centaurs all talk like over the top pirates and I dig it
There is a bad guy named "Verminaard" and I am scream laughing into my notebook
Love the old impersonating a deity trick, definitely one of my faves
Yaaasssss Lady Dragon Alert!!!
Dungeon crawl dungeon crawl dungeon crawl!!!
Raistlin straight up says "while you were studying the blade, I was learning something useful" what a tool
FANTASY ELEVATOR FIGHT
Please take Bupu as your new party member she just told ugly ass Raistlin he was pretty and actually knows what's going on in this damn dungeon
The Gully Dwarf king is call Highbulp Phudge and this is Dendybar levels of generic candybar naming right here
Okay the ruined city of Xak Tsaroth is atmospheric af
The first Gully Dwarf king discovered Xak Tsaroth by falling down a well during a bender and I am obsessed with this origin lore
Raistlin literally says "No one will ever understand me!" UNIRONICALLY like every shitty teen stereotype ever and it's incredible
Wow Raistlin actually acts like areal person with Bupu and his sending her off was incredibly sweet....why the fuck am I having an emotion about RAISTLIN???
Things I DETEST about Act 1
The cast. Starting with Tanis Halfelven. He seems to have two modes: being uselessly indecisive and mangst. That's it. He's the party leader and his indecisiveness could be very interesting. However, his party just....keeps following him? So I can't tell if he's actually supposed to be incompetent or a Gary Stu badass with a very confusing veneer of imperfection. Also he's very mean to half his party for no apparent reason but more on that later.
Goldmoon and Riverwind. I have to talk about them both because they exemplify two different and somewhat intertwined tropes that I utterly DESPISE. Riverwind is a quintessential Noble Savage straight out of Dances With Wolves right down to being the strong, silent type. Now, nothing is inherently wrong with being a strong silent type but EVERY MALE NATIVE AMERICAN CODED CHARACTER WAS THE STRONG SILENT TYPE IN THE 80S and boy howdy it has not aged well. Then there's Goldmoon. She's literally a Magical White Woman and it is gross. Her people are consistently described as being dark skinned and dark haired while she's over there being inexplicably blonde, pale, and also she's the first cleric her people have seen in a millennia. I know that I'm probably just reading too much into her being inexplicably white and also having magic BUT THOSE TWO THINGS TOO OFTEN COINCIDE AND I HATE IT. I wouldn't be putting up nearly as much of a stink if it was just her hair that's inexplicably blonde and she's still dark skinned BUT NO. SHE'S WHITE. SHE IS CONSTANTLY DESCRIBED AS BEING PALE AND BEAUTIFUL UNLIKE OTHER WOMEN IN HER NATION. YUCK YUCK GROSS
I want to talk about Caramon, Raistlin's himbo brother but the fact that I don't have anything to say about him is a problem in itself. The man has no personality aside from he loves his brother and food and that is very sad.
Oh joy, the first thing Tanis angsts about is how he's the product of a rape and it's an integral part of his identity....my favorite plot point.....
Man I like hobgoblins so much in modern DND that it's super unfortunate to see them as exclusively dumb toadies in the 80s
Oh dear it seems this party also suffers from Only One Girl syndrome. Heaven forbid a DND party has more than one woman in it at any given point
Raistlin stop being an angsty shit wizard and let your himbo twin love you
Did that shitty Gandalf knockoff just...compel Goldmoon to SING HER ENTIRE BACKSTORY TO A CROWDED TAVERN KNOWING BAD GUYS OUTSIDE ARE ACTIVELY LOOKING FOR HER??? WHAT THE FUCK SHITTY GANDALF KNOCKOFF??
I really do not understand how these people are friends? Like, all they do is bicker, think mean things about each other, and discuss how inevitable a betrayal from certain party members will be. Like, I know this book was based off an actual DND game so I have to ask, was it even fun to play? Did you guys enjoy talking about how badly you want to throw your friend's wizard character under the bus at multiple occasions? Maybe I'm just a pussy, but that doesn't sound very fun
"I wouldn't trust us." God Tanis is so ANGSTY
The Native American coding of the barbarians continues to be MEGA YIKES
So are the draconians slimy or scaly? You are giving me conflicting messages here
Oh god I can smell a Tanis love triangle on the winds and it smells like gym socks and regret
Everyone is constantly on the brink of PVP in this party and it is very uncomfortable to read
Raistlin gives me such character whiplash sometimes. One minute he's hilarious and the next I want to put a boot so far up his ass he tastes it
Caramon pls grow more of a personality than "food good" I'm begging you
"You will call me master!" Are you a cartoon villain by any chance, Raistlin?
Nooooo not the village!!! Poor Goldmoon and Riverwind :(
Blech! Getting doused by black dragon acid breath gets a 0/10 from Riverwind
I think the fact that Flint is only the SECOND most one note character I have ever encountered is depressing. The first is also in this book
No one makes any innuendos about the slimy pipe entrance 0/10 wasted opportunity
Don't you just love blanket characterizations for an entire subspecies of dwarves? Don't you just love it when the characterizations are all mean spirited and negative for no good reason?
All of the somatic components for Raistlin's spells are just the regular DND spells but SPELLED WRONG I CAN'T DECIDE IF THAT'S CLEVER OR IF I HATE IT
When did Goldmoon and Riverwind start fighting?? Stahp
There is a mage named Fistandantilus and no one is going to take the opportunity to make a joke about it 0/10
If you add Goldmoon and make this a Tanis love quadrangle I am going to barf
Well that was an anticlimactic dragon fight
Tanis barges into a temple to yell at the gods like every teenage atheist's wet dream
So, despite my criticism of several points in this book, I am still enjoying it. I am very interested in the upcoming war with the draconians and getting THE DEEP LORE about why the gods forsook Krynn. Also I am hoping and praying that the cast starts to grow on me. Overall, I'm giving Act 1 a 6/10. There were a lot of good bits that do help me overlook the slew of things that did not age well but it's no Icewind Dale Trilogy so far. The review for Act 2 should be coming along shortly!
more lil free library reviews!
yes! i am back on my bullshit and left 37 books in lil free libraries today. this is what i left and my reviews (below cut obviously cause lord did i do a deep clean)
written in my own heart’s blood, by diana gabaldon. 2/10: honestly, i stopped caring about three books ago
oathbreakers, by mercedes lackey. 3/3: i think m.lack lowkey hates keth but at least jadrek’s a bro
the oathbound, by mercedes lackey. 2/3: we stan an ace queen but kethry... babe.
dragons of winter night, by margaret weis & tracy hickman. 3/3: Sturm Brightblade, my beloved.
dragons of spring dawning, by margaret weis & tracy hickman. 1/3: raist doesn’t deserve caramon. i love him, but he doesn’t.
upright women wanted, by sarah gailey. 5/5: all of them are wives; i am looking so respectfully
a light in the window, by jan karon. 5/10: utterly inoffensive
these high, green hills, by jan karon. 5/10: absolute beach energy. no brains. who needs em.
gideon the ninth, by tamsyn muir. 2/2: this incredibly slaps. amazing. no notes.
harrow the ninth, by tamsyn muir. 1/2: i’m sure it’s great i just simply can’t handle second-person narration
haunted, by chuck palahniuk. 9/10: if you’re trans, approach “Speaking Bitterness” with extreme caution. If you’re a woman, do the same. Ic you’ve survived abuse - bless you - do the same. Approach “Speaking Bitterness” with caution. Also, I have questions about Terry’s legs.
the readers of broken wheel recommend, by katarina bivald. 4/10: after 97 pages, i simply stopped caring
the masterpiece, by fiona davis. 8/10: honestly, just a charming delight
running with the demon, by terry brooks. 14/32: sinnissippi is the FUNNIEST NAME IN THE WORLD, thank you, terry
knight of the word, by terry brooks. 8/32: i feel like terry was going through some stuff but chill on the christianity, my man
angel fire east, by terry brooks. 7/32: i would fight john ross in real life. nest deserved so much better.
armageddon’s children, by terry brooks. 15/32: honestly this one is just a bummer
the elves of cintra, by terry brooks. 17/32: all the fantasy writers in the pnw are smoking something and i want in
the gypsy morph, by terry brooks. 16/32: insane.
bearers of the black staff, by terry brooks. 24/32: reading this series and then the ‘fall’ series is offensive
the measure of the magic, by terry brooks. 23/32: i don’t like phryne, but this... i like this.
ilse witch, by terry brooks. 20/32: by far the best of it’s trilogy
antrax, by terry brooks. 19/32: things really take a turn in this one
morgawr, by terry brooks. 18/32: if you’re planning on reading the prequels, read through this series first cause otherwise there’s no surprise elements
jarka ruus, by terry brooks. 9/32: ah. weka dart. my friend, my beloved, my enemy
tanequil, by terry brooks. 3/32: unironically, i think terry might hate women
straken, by terry brooks. 4/32: this isn’t a joke i hate the forbidding
wards of faerie, by terry brooks. 22/32: a glorious return to what it should be!! yes!!
bloodfire quest, by terry brooks. 5/32: men should never be allowed to be fantasy protagonists
witch wraith, by terry brooks. 10/32: let! grianne!! rest!!!
the high druid’s blade, by terry brooks. 11/32: somehow the most uninteresting book in the series, it’s weird
the darkling child, by terry brooks. 12/32: again? okay
the sorcerer’s daughter, by terry brooks. 21/32: i’m obsessed with leofur’s arc
the black elfstone, by terry brooks. 13/32: fun and flirty and sexy even though you know score
the skaar invasion, by terry brooks. 6/32: psych you don’t know the score
the stiehl assassin, by terry brooks. 2/32: how dare he
the last druid, by terry brooks. 1/32: not only is the worst in its quadrilogy, it’s the worst in the series and a disgraceful finale. a disappointing book on all fronts.