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#maria imagine
somemismatchedsocks · 2 months
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OK LIKE BUT
WHAT IF
JUST HEAR ME OUT
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Edit:
ok sorry i realized I posted without much context, this is like some time after the events of sonic prime.
EDIT 2:
OOHMYGOD
ohmygodohmygod
GUYS IM FREAKING OUT
this comic
in dub
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droffie · 3 months
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Sometimes Maria feels good enough to run and play in the ARK, but some days she is really sick.
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skipper1331 · 17 days
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Communication is key // Alexia Putellas
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Without thinking, you called Alexia, feeling frustrated and disappointed about her behavior.
"Hello amor"
"Were you at the beach with the girls yesterday?"
Since weeks you had been asking if she wanted to hangout and go to be beach, just for some time away from football.
"Yes, why?" she replied, confused.
"I don’t want to fight, but I’m asking since 2 weeks if you want to go to the beach with me and you tell me you‘re busy each time and now you went out with the other girls? To the beach? Even though, you know I’ve been asking…You didn‘t ask if I wanted to join you guys" you said, upset about the fact that Alexia acted that way and that you got so carried away as to even bring it up.
"Eh- um…" the midfielder was silent for a moment, thinking about how to phrase it as kindly as possible "the problem is that Mapi has a problem with you and that’s why we decided as a group that you can‘t join. It wouldn’t end well"
"We‘re a friend group of 5 people…? If she has a problem she should talk to me privately."
The friends group consisted of Mapi, Ingrid, Frido, Ale and yourself.
"Yeah.."
"So, I’m no longer part of the group when Mapi is there? That‘s so nice, Alexia, thanks!" your voice was laced with sarcasm and anger.
Of all people, you at least thought Alexia would defend or support you - you were her girlfriend.
"What do you want to hear from me? The girls asked and I wanted to do something as a group so I went along. And if they exclude you, there's nothing I can do about it. Just chill out, we'll catch up on it at some point."
The betrayal and hurt you felt in that moment, was unreal - how could she say something like that? She was the person who had asked you out a dozens of times with puppy dog eyes. She was the one who begged for your kisses and love. And she was the one who wanted to spend every second of the day with you, no matter what plans either of you had.
Why was she acting so cold and rude now?
"You know what? If you want to hangout with me, then feel free to text me, but I won‘t be running after you, just to get rejected every time, even though you apparently have the time but just don't want to when it’s with me, your girlfriend! So, text me if you want to do something that isn’t having sex, otherwise we'll see each other in training."
With that you ended the call.
Did your friend group really decided that? It didn‘t seem to make any sense. And was even the problem with Mapi? The two of you were friends, never any problem between the two of you. But more importantly: what was the matter with Alexia? Why was she acting weird and distant? Have you done something wrong?
Normally, both of you were all over each other, holding hands, kissing in the storage room or even just an arm around your waist - spending almost 24/7 together. What was happening?
You declined every call that came in after, the caller id always the same.
reina 👑
amor, por favor.
call me back
lo siento
Caught up in your anger, you started to deep clean your apartment, not being bothered to call her back or even reply. The cleaning relaxed you but it also got you thinking. Was Alexia acting like this because she wanted to break up with you? Did she realize that you weren’t worth her time, attention and love? You always had a feeling that Alexia would break up with you at some point, many pretty girls in the world that would die to even just meet Alexia, let alone be loved by her.
That night you went to bed feeling very queasy and stressed - was she really about to break with you? She had texted you multiple times as she also had tried to call you but you didn’t answer.
The next day, you went to training acting as usually but with one exception - you avoided Ale and the rest of your friend group.
You did partner drills with Patri, talked in water breaks with Lucy and ate lunch with Aitana, Keira and Caro.
It was usual that you socialized with other people than your friend group but the unusual part was that Alexia didn‘t follow you around like a lost puppy. Instead she sent longing looks towards you, sad smiles displaying in her face when you dodged her glances as she tried to act tough and unbothered by your ignorance.
"What have you done?" a thick English accent asked the midfielder who was walking towards the changing room.
"Maybe I handled things a bit wrong" she explained, not wanting to reveal too much - a little bit scared of the Lucy Bronze as she had gotten the shovel talk from her when she started dating you.
'If you hurt her, I will haunt and hurt you' Lucy had told the Barcelona captain.
That day, Alexia promised Lucy and herself to never hurt you - not that she intended to anyways.
"You better make up with her otherwise I will have to hurt you" the defender smiled, entering the locker and walking to her cubby.
Alexia was quick to take a shower and get ready, waiting for you in front of the facility. She knew you hadn‘t left yet as you had entered the changing room when she came out of the shower.
She indeed wanted to make up with you, the whole situation a misunderstanding.
When you walked out of the facility, she called after you, "Amor, ¡esperar!" grabbing your hand, stopping you on your short journey to the car, "can we talk?" her voice was gentle and caring.
"Do you want to break up with me?" you asked straight forward, stepping back, trying to protect yourself with the distance yet you knew it wouldn’t help from a potential heart break.
"No no, amor, no. Let me pick you up at 7, okay? I‘ll explain everything"
You thought about it, unsure what to do.
"Okay"
It was Alexia after all, the person who was always honest. If she wanted to explain something, she would.
"Thank you, amor" she pressed a kiss to your cheek, walking you to your car, "be safe" she said as watched you, pull out of the parking lot, feeling so much better now that she had talked to you, even if it was just a few sentences - now that you had smiled at her.
-
5 minutes early, she rang your door bell, shuffling with her feet and fidgeting with her hands - she was nervous.
"Come in" you greeted her, "just need to put on my shoes then we can go"
The midfielder nodded, shyly entering your home as if she hadn‘t been here before.
"You look very beautiful, like always" she smiled, cheeks slowly turning red. Alexia felt like as if it was your first date all over again. She still remembered how shy and nervous she was, wanting to do everything perfect, so you‘d like her and she could ask you on another date. Also she had said the exact same thing when she picked you up for your first date.
"Reminds me of something" you chuckled, as well thinking back to the night where she had taken you out.
"Sí, you‘re getting prettier every day that hasn‘t changed"
Alexia thought you were the prettiest girl in the world, you took her breath away every time she saw you - you were absolutely stunning.
"charmer" you giggled, cheeks a dark shade of red. In that moment, everything felt like it used to be. She wasn‘t acting distant or weird, she was acting like the girl you fell in love with.
Everything is going to be okay.
"Amor, may I?" she asked politely, offering her arm as you had put on your shoes. Wordlessly, you linked your arms, walking towards her car. She opened the door for you, hurriedly rushing over to her side before she started the engine and rested her hand on your thigh. She was glad when you didn‘t push her off - you had missed her touch all day.
The two of you stayed in silence, your favourite songs playing as she drove to her destination. With every metre you got closer, she became more nervous and anxious. She knew she had some explaining to do but also was about to ask you an important question - which was the reason she even had to explain things. She wouldn‘t let a misunderstanding fuck things up with you. She wanted to marry you in the future - your relationship was very serious to her.
(Also she did not wanted to get haunted by a certain scary English defender.)
-
"Why are we at the beach?" you asked, the ocean right in front of you.
"Do you trust me?" the Barcelona player questioned, avoiding your question - she would explain in a moment, you just had to wait and trust her.
"I‘m not quite sure?" Ale raised an eyebrow, "fine, I trust you"
The girl smiled widely, stepping behind you and covering your eyes with her hands, "are you about to murder me?" you joked, knowing damn well that Alexia wouldn‘t dream of letting you fall or hurt yourself in any kind of way.
"Keep walking, amor"
-
After a short walk in the sand, the woman stopped, slowly revealing the sight in front of you.
There was a large picnic blanket, cushions and basket, wine and two glasses standing next to it - it looked romantic.
"Ale- what‘s all of this?" you asked confused, already emotionally touched by the gesture.
She sat down, making herself comfortable before she tapped between her legs, "come here"
Sitting in between her legs, staring towards the ocean and the beautiful sunset while she purred two glasses of wine.
"This is wow" you muttered, not yet leaning into her body as you were still moody at her but still admiring the work and view. It was indeed very romantic, rose petals and candles decorated everything around the two of you.
"I‘m sorry for avoiding you" Alexia started, loosely wrapping her free arm around your midsection, "i didn‘t mean to act weird. I was here with the girls to practice this- they helped me to set everything up and encouraged me for what I’m about to do. Ingrid decorated, Frido made the snacks and well, Mapi carried everything while I was freaking out at home because I didn’t know what to wear. I‘m sorry for letting you think i want to break with you or for acting weird, i was just really nervous these past weeks" she put her wine glass down in the sand, making sure it wouldn‘t fall before she pulled something out of her pocket, "I’m always nervous when I’m around you but this time it was different. I was scared of getting rejected and in return, I rejected you without even realizing."
Hidden in her hand, she gave you her little 'present' - a key.
"I would like you to move in with me." she breathed out, her heart racing.
You turned in her hold, looking at her with wide eyes.
"You‘re sleeping at my apartment almost every day and i can barely sleep without you being in my arms, so i thought maybe you would like stay at my place every night from now on" she rambled, fidgeting with the hem of your shirt.
The widest grin broke out on your face and you kissed her - you had been wanting to bring up the topic since awhile now, yet always feeling too shy to do so as you knew Alexia loved her personal space and alone time. You didn’t want her to feel pressured or to feel like she had to agree.
But now you’re even happier that the idea and suggestion came from her - she wanted this too - she was ready for the next step.
"I’d love to" you answered, kissing her rapidly as she giggled while you did so.
"I‘m glad" she sighed in relief, puckering her lips once again.
More kisses, please
You happily accepted the key.
The key wasn’t just any key, it symbolized that it was the key to her heart and home, that communication was the key to happiness, and that her nervousness couldn't always open all doors - which she had realized now;
Spending the whole at training without you was horrible. She never wanted to experience that again.
-
As your little picnic date continued (both of you back at being sickeningly in love with each other) the sun almost down completely, a question popped up in your head, "Mapi doesn’t have a problem with me, does she?"
A loud hearty laugh escaped your girlfriend, "no, amor, you‘re perfect. When you called me the girls were with me and I panicked and Mapi was signing something, so that‘s what came to my mind with her wild gestures. I‘m sorry if it sounded rude. Everybody loves you and you are very much a part of the group, my favourite member in fact"
Weirdly, you could imagine Mapi way too well and Alexia never lied to you. Added to that she was a horrible liar, her brows slightly raising when she lied or was trying to.
You believed and trusted her. It all made sense now - you remember how nervous she was when she asked you out on a date, you remember how nervous she was when she actually took you out, also how nervous she was when she asked the girlfriend question and how nervous she was just today.
You could only imagine how nervous she would be if she ever decided to ask you to be her wife.
Which Alexia definitely would do.
She would always be nervous around you, it‘s you - you‘re way too perfect for this world, so Ale had every right to be nervous every day anew - you were the key to all her happiness.
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ktgoodmorning · 20 days
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The Wall
Mapi Leon x Teen!Reader
Inspired by the song "The Wall" by GroupLove
“Just sitting on a wall, always trying to do it all” “Really wanna get away, to where I couldn’t say” “Yeah we got lucky, fell into place” “We found some friends, some stayed some passed away”
A/N: The timeline is a little funky, I know Leila didn't leave in the middle of the season but we're gonna pretend for the sake of the story. Even though I posted the lyric, nobody dies, just overall angsty, more parts to come.
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“You ready to go, amiga?” Mapi shouted across the house at you even though she already knew the answer. You were always ready long before she or Ingrid ever were. It wasn’t unusual for you to be up extra early to start your day with a run or at the very least, a long walk. At only 19, you hadn’t been playing with the senior team long and wanted to do everything you possibly could to prove yourself, even if it meant getting up at four in the morning. 
When you’d been called up to the senior team, Mapi and Ingrid had insisted that you move into their spare room to help you get adjusted until you settled in better. Originally, they had pitched the idea in order to make sure you were taking care of yourself and doing everything you needed to to be successful with the team. They had no idea how prepared you already were. Still, many of the older girls had taken you under their wing, Mapi more than anyone. She was highly protective of you and was always making sure you were doing okay, even if you didn’t normally need it. They rarely had to do much, as you were one of the hardest working members of the team. 
Some might call you a perfectionist, type A, or maybe a bit obsessive, but what you were doing was working. You would do anything it took to be the best footballer you could possibly be. Getting up early was just the start. You were always eating as healthy as possible with very few cheat days. You had done plenty of research on nutrition and everything you needed to eat (and not eat) to perform at your best so you always stuck to that. You often watched film from each game at least two to three times beyond what the team watched in training. That was your favorite way to improve yourself when your body really needed a break from training. It wasn’t a lot but it was everything you needed. Everything you needed to be enough. 
You grabbed your bag and joined Mapi and Ingrid in heading to the car to go to training. Ingrid sat down in the driver’s seat while Mapi plugged in her phone to play some music that you didn’t even recognize. As you sat in the backseat, you were slightly lost in thought, thinking of what you needed to work on today. Speed and endurance were always something you tried to improve but maybe it was more important today to focus on your passing accuracy but also you needed to work on your shooting or maybe-
“Hey did you hear me?” Your thoughts were interrupted as Ingrid snapped you back into the real world. 
“Hmm? Sorry.” You mumbled as you gathered your thoughts back to focus on the two girls in front of you. “What’d you say?”
“Leila said you were going with her after training? Is that right?” Of course you were forgetting something- your dinner plans with Leila. You sighed gently, trying to straighten out your schedule in your head. 
“Oh, umm, yeah. We wanted to go to this new restaurant. I guess I forgot.” Because she was sitting in front of you, you missed the way Ingrid’s brow furrowed at the lack of enthusiasm in your response. Leila had become like a fun older sister to you. The two of you got dinner together at least once a week and were typically causing some sort of trouble during training. She kept you from taking yourself too seriously, worried that if you went unchecked you’d spiral under the amount of pressure you placed on yourself. Like many of the older girls, she had taken it upon herself to protect you. It was different with Leila because she treated you as more of an equal rather than a child. Because of this, everyone knew how much you cherished your time with her. 
Mapi took the opportunity to lightly tease you for your weird behavior, “don’t get too excited there, chica.” She turned to look at you, trying to gauge your reaction to her comment. 
It didn’t offend you, although you still didn’t laugh. You just weren’t really bothered by the comment at all. “Sorry, just thinking about other stuff.” 
The older two girls had let it go, changing the subject as you got closer to the training grounds. You missed the look of nervousness shared between the two of them as you got lost in your thoughts once again. 
~
You remained focused all throughout training, focusing on the things you needed to improve- speed, endurance, strength, passing, shooting, accuracy- the list in your head was miles long. Anytime the other girls would joke around, they knew you typically needed some coaxing to join in. However anytime one of your closer friends would get you in on it, that’s usually all it took. Leila was your weak spot, sometimes Pina too. They were always able to break down your walls of focus and seriousness and allow yourself to have a little fun. If it weren’t for them (and the rest of your team’s antics), everyone knew you’d sink into your perfectionism even further. 
As you walked off the field at the end of the session, it was Pina that spoke to you first. “Hey, some of us are going out tomorrow night, you’re in right?”
Your face contorted with uncertainty, torn between the idea of having fun with your friends for a night and knowing you could use the sleep to prepare for Sunday's match. 
Suddenly, an arm wrapped around your shoulders and you instantly recognized it as Leila’s, “Si, she’ll be there. Even if I have to drag her out myself.” 
Well there was your answer. You gave the two girls a shrug, knowing you’d enjoy the time out with them. A little relaxation couldn’t hurt, right? You deserved it after how hard you had been working so far this season. And just because you went out didn’t mean you had to drink yourself into oblivion. You’d still be plenty prepared for the next match. As you all got ready to leave, Claudia filled you in on the plans, making you look forward to the night even more. 
There was a newfound lightness in your step as you followed Leila to her car and went to the restaurant for dinner. You were excited for tomorrow night with everyone. It had been awhile since you’d let your guard down and just had fun for a night so you knew it’d be good for you. You knew how much you needed it and were thankful your friends were able to give you the little push you needed to agree. You were thankful for your friends until you got to dinner with Leila and learned the true reasons behind the night out. 
You were sitting across from her, in the corner of the small restaurant when she broke the news to you- she’d be transferring to Manchester. The party tomorrow night was to have one last celebration together before she left. Instantly your chest tightened. She continued talking, explaining why it was a good decision and that she’d always be there to support you no matter how far away she was. However none of this registered to you. The second she said the words, you quit processing anything else. 
Manchester? Why Manchester? How could she leave Barcelona? How could she leave you? She always said you were like family but you don’t just leave your family behind. Was Barcelona not good enough for her anymore? Or worse yet, did she not think she was good enough for Barcelona? If that was the case, how could you ever be good enough for Barca? Or for Leila for that matter? If you were a good enough “sister” to her, she would have no reason to want to leave, to go so far away. 
Leila managed to pull you out of your thoughts when she reached across the table to hold your hand. “Hey, take a breath, it’s okay. You can still call me whenever you need anything, I’ll still come visit. You’ll be okay, I promise.” 
She squeezed your hand tightly, trying to get you to meet her eyes, but you just couldn’t do it. You knew she had talked about not renewing her contract but you clearly had been too naive to think it could actually happen. Suddenly it hit you that other people must have already known. If Claudia had already had the time to plan a party, when did she find out about this? Had you been the last to find out?
“(y/n),” she squeezed your hand again, tighter this time, getting concerned at how you still had yet to respond. 
Suddenly you were snapped back into reality, shaking your head quickly, “I’ve gotta go, I’m sorry.” Leila could hardly hear you as you mumbled, barely coherent. Frantically, you had pushed away from the table and made your way towards the door. You were almost running as you finally made it outside. 
The cool evening air hit you hard. It helped you steady your breathing slightly, feeling less choked by the air of the restaurant. You didn’t notice how much your hands were shaking until you grabbed your phone to call Mapi, hoping she could pick you up. 
In the time it took you to unlock your phone and pull up her contact, Leila appeared next to you. “Don’t be ridiculous, chiquita. I will drive you, come on.” She grabbed your hand before you had the chance to argue and led you to her car. Her silence was unusual but you hardly noticed, consumed by your thoughts. 
Her heart broke when she saw your reaction. Obviously Leila knew you’d be upset but she couldn’t have imagined you’d take it this hard. The Spaniard was consumed with guilt as she tried her best to focus on the road ahead. It had crossed her mind that maybe she should have told you sooner but she wanted to make sure it was completely finalized first. You’d have other people that could step into her role when she was gone, people that would make sure you’d be taken care of. And like she said, she’d still be just a phone call away. Hopefully you just needed a night to let the shock wear off so you could both enjoy your time together before she had to leave. 
You hardly realized that you had arrived in front of Mapi and Ingrid’s, the entire care ride being completely silent until now. “Chiquita, can we please talk?” She was still met with complete silence from you, taking it as an invitation to continue on. “Listen, I’m sorry. I should have talked to you sooner but I just-”
“It’s fine.” you shrugged her off, her face full of confusion.
“But, I should’ve-” 
“Leila, it’s fine. I’m fine. I’ve got to go.” 
“But (y/n), I-” and you were gone. Leila let out an exasperated sigh when you slammed the car door shut, mid sentence. So much for talking to you. The older woman texted Mapi, hoping she’d be able to talk to you in a way that was more successful than what had just happened. 
Mapi had just read Leila’s message when you trudged through the front door. She decided not to let you know what Leila had told her, trying to see how much you’d be willing to share on your own. Committing to her plan, she greeted you, just as chipper as always, “Hola, Amiga! How was Leila?” 
You responded with a shrug, doing your best to push your feelings down. If you just pushed them away, you’d be fine, right? “She was fine.” Mapi and Ingrid shared a look of concern at you making a beeline for your room. Once you made it to your room, then you could handle whatever you were feeling, but you weren’t about to do that in front of them. 
Your plan would’ve worked out if it weren’t for Ingrid making one last attempt to get you to talk, “Hey, did you want to join us for a movie night?” You were so close, your door right in front of you. You pressed your forehead against the door, taking a strangled deep breath in an attempt to keep your emotions at bay. “(y/n)?” They shared another glance, concerned by your reaction. 
Almost in slow motion, you turned silently to face the pair. “Did you know?” You choked over your words. You didn’t plan on talking about it tonight. You didn’t know how to face this news but you had to know the answer. Did Leila really tell everyone but you? The silence from Mapi told you everything you needed to know. All you could do was turn and take refuge in your bedroom. 
As soon as the door shut, you pressed your back against it and slid down until you met the ground. Knowing you well, Mapi knew you’d want some time to handle it yourself. You were fiercely independent, always acting much older than you were. Sometimes Mapi had to remind others how young you were, making sure nobody went too hard on you. At times she had to remind you of that as well. Remind you that you were still learning, still figuring out life. Mapi admired your maturity but was also terrified that it would end up breaking you. She knew if she tried to follow you know, you’d push her out even further and want to try to fix it yourself first. 
If only she could see you- sitting on the floor, tears rolling down your face as you choked down sobs. Your whole body shook, filled to the brim with emotions that you were too scared to let out. Your cries continued, much longer than ever before. 
            At some point during your crying, you had made your way into bed. The blankets and pillows provided you little comfort from the world inside your head. You didn’t even realize you had cuddled up with a sweatshirt of Leila’s. You borrowed it once when you were chilly and she let you keep it after she saw how much you loved it. It was instinctual for you to reach for it in times of stress so of course you hugged it tightly as you cried over the idea of her leaving you. Eventually, your cries seemed to tire you, succumbing to the exhaustion and falling into an uneasy sleep. 
~
When Mapi and Ingrid had finished their movie and you were still yet to emerge from your room, they knew they needed to check up on you. Mapi being the closest with you, always took it upon herself to play the role of mother when you needed it. She knocked on your door lightly, expecting some sort of response. When she was met with none, she pressed her ear against your door, hoping to hear something that’d give her an idea of how you we doing. With still no response, she gently pushed the door open. 
Upon seeing you, Mapi let out a breath she didn’t realize she was holding. You were curled up on your bed, fast asleep. She quietly sat down next to you, taking in your stressed appearance. Your face was still stained from tears, your eyes puffy and red. The older woman pushed some hair away from your face and ran her thumb over your eyebrows, hoping to relax the crease that remained on your face. It was clear to her who’s sweatshirt it was that you were gripping tightly. Mapi realized that while you were clearly sad, you must not be too angry at Leila herself. You wouldn’t be snuggled into her sweatshirt if you were mad at her. 
Mapi pulled up your blanket around your shoulders and pressed a light kiss to your forehead, assuming that you’d be feeling better in the morning. Of course it would be hard on you to see one of the closest people in your life move away but Mapi knew she and Ingrid would be with you to help, no matter what it took. You were a hard worker, resilient in nature. There was no reason for anyone to expect you to be anything but that. 
~
The next morning, Mapi was surprised when she entered the kitchen and didn’t see any trace of you. Sometimes you’d be up, cooking breakfast or at the very least, she’d see your empty mug in the sink which communicated that you’d had your coffee before going on a run. When she looked closer, she noticed your shoes and training bag already gone. Intending to call you, she opened her phone just to notice an unread message from you: 
Wanted to train early. Used my run to run here. See you later. 
Mapi’s face contorted as she read your message. How early had you left? The training grounds weren’t exactly close and would’ve taken a long time to run there. You were probably exhausted after being so upset the night before but maybe you wanted that run to clear your head and would talk with her afterwards.
~
Mapi and Ingrid arrived to training early, hoping to catch you before the rest of the team showed up. They stopped in the locking room first, thinking you’d be taking a break there and waiting for everyone else. When they didn’t find you there, they went on to the gym, the physio rooms, and the cafeteria- all of which remained empty. They hesitantly decided to check the pitch, confused as to why you’d be willing to spend more time in the sun on top of the time you’d spend outside for team training. 
Of course that’s where they found you- on the side of the pitch running sprints. You didn’t notice them, fully lost in your own head, running as fast as your body would take you. Your lungs were burning. At this point, you had no idea how long you’d been running, definitely over an hour. 
But you needed to. You had to get faster. You had to work harder. You had to prove that your spot on the team was not from getting lucky. You had worked for it. You were still working for it. 
Maybe if you ran fast enough, you could run away from all your problems. Run away from here. Run away from being lonely. Or stressed. Or tired. Or insecure. Or not good enough. You didn’t need anyone’s help- not Leila’s, not Ingrid, not Mapi. You had to do this yourself. You had to work harder. 
Mapi froze- watching you run yourself to exhaustion. She had never seen you like this. She’d seen you struggle but she’d never seen this. How would she even begin to help you? Clearly you couldn’t continue in this headspace but right now your friend was completely lost as to where to even begin with you. She sent Ingrid back inside, knowing her best chance at getting you to open up was if you were alone.
“Amiga! Come on! Come take a break before training starts!” Her shouting across the pitch at you was the first you were made aware of her presence. You shook your head at her and continued your sprints, not bothering to look her way. Your lungs didn’t have the capacity to use your voice at the moment. “Si, vamos! It was not a suggestion, you have to be done out here!” Once again, you ignored her. 
The older woman let out a heavy sigh, knowing she was going to have to stop you herself. She did just that as she lightly jogged towards you, intending on intercepting your path. You didn’t even notice what she was doing until you suddenly struggled to avoid running into her. You stumbled over your feet while she grabbed at your shoulders, hoping to help steady you. With how fast you had been going, it was difficult trying to stop your momentum so suddenly- something she should have known before trying to get in your way.  As soon as you had steadied, you were filled with anger and Mapi’s hands holding onto you tightly were not helping. The Zaragozan had no idea the amount of rage you were about to unleash onto her.
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manhattanminute2 · 9 months
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Avengers reactions to being called straight:
Carol: The fuck, no I'm not.
Maria Hill: Excuse the hell out of you?
Valkyrie: Ding dong, you are wrong!
Wanda: Who told you that? And why did they lie?
Kate: Rude.
Natasha: *punches the person*
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egelantier · 7 months
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PSA: Winterfox/Requires Hate/Benjanun Sriduangkaew/Maria Ying
I'm starting to see recs for Benjanun Sriduangkaew crop up in fandom again, so here's your reminder that Benjanun Sriduangkaew, aka Maria Ying, is actually Winterfox/Requires_Hate, a well-known serial harasser, blackmailer and abuser who decided that the best thing to do with her multimillionaire heiress time and money is to do real and lasting harm to many communities and many writers (especially writers of color) that she saw as rivals.
with how fast things move online right now, I imagine she's banking on people just forgetting everything she pulled: please don't! But even if you won't deny her your attention, at least keep yourself safe and remember that her modus operandi used to be either love bombing people until they let slip something she then blackmailed them with, or literally decades of unhinged harassment.
feel free to share.
original sources:
Mixon report: https://feralsapient.com/?p=889
The letter to Apex editors: https://web.archive.org/web/20170216003240/http://awitin.likhain.net/2017/02/a-letter-to-apex-editors-re-the-intersectional-sff-roundtable/
Zen Cho's report (start here of you never heard of any of this): https://web.archive.org/web/20200808225250/https://zencho.org/being-an-itemised-list-of-disagreements/
*she had once upon a time deleted her blog, hence the Wayback link; but now it's re-uploaded by her here, as she explicitly still stands by her words: https://zencho.org/articles/being-an-itemised-list-of-disagreements/
Rachel Manija Brown's report: https://rachelmanija.dreamwidth.org/1288081.html
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literaryavenger · 2 months
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Happy Birthday
Summary: It's your birthday and the only person who doesn't seem to be excited about it is you.
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader
Warnings: Mentions of death. Angst. Fluff. Language probably. My poor attempts at being funny.
Word Count: 2.5K
A/N: This story was completely self-indulgent, but I hope someone out there likes it!
Masterlist
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You’ve always been very reluctant to celebrate your birthday.
You haven’t had a birthday party since you were 12. The following year your mom died a couple of days before and neither you nor your family were in the mood to celebrate anything.
It wasn’t by any means unexpected, she had been sick for a few years, but it still hit you hard.
You were the youngest and were far too young when she first got sick to really understand everything going on.
You were 8 and all you really remember is watching your mom get more and more sick until eventually there was nothing more the doctors could do.
Her death hit you hard and you closed yourself off, never talking about it or even crying after the day of her funeral. To this day you’ve still never cried, in front of others or even by yourself.
You started exercising to channel all your energy, refusing to do anything more like the therapy your family suggested. 
When you were 15 you discovered SHIELD and decided you wanted to help others, so you signed up for the SHIELD Academy, working your hardest and pushing yourself to your very limit.
You ended up being not only the youngest cadet ever, but the youngest to actually graduate and then the youngest recruit at SHIELD at only 16 years old.
Natasha was very impressed when she heard about you and took a liking to you, convincing Fury to make you part of her team during her missions and teaching you everything she knows.
That’s how you ended up in the Avengers Initiative, not that you felt you didn’t deserve it since you know how hard you worked and everything you gave up to work towards this achievement. 
The team themselves were initially skeptical since you were barely 18 during the battle of New York, but they were quickly proven wrong when they saw how well you handled yourself against the Chitauri. 
You were devastated when SHIELD fell, but carried on as an Avenger, battling Ultron and then moving to the Compound with the team.
You met the actual Bucky for the first time when you were 22, during the whole Civil War thing with Baron Zemo. Like Natasha, you were on Tony’s team, fighting mostly Pietro, but the conflict eventually ended. 
It took Tony some time to get over the whole “Bucky killing his parents while brainwashed” thing, but, as he likes to say, he can’t call himself a genius without admitting that Bucky didn’t have much of a choice. 
Thanks to Tony’s help Shuri was able to find a solution to Bucky’s brainwashing faster than she would’ve alone, meaning Bucky didn’t have to go back into cryo and was pretty quickly cleared to join the team, about a year after the airport battle in Leipzig.
You were warmly accepted by everybody and, the more the team grew the more you felt at home with these people.
And now you wish you could burn down the whole compound because, somehow, Tony convinced you to have a birthday party for the first time in 13 years because, in his words, 'you only turn 25 once'.
Good news is you managed to make him limit the guest list to the team and other people close to you like Maria Hill and Fury. Bad news is you’re still gonna be the center of attention, which you hate.
You couldn’t stop Tony from making everyone dress up for the party, and you couldn’t stop the team from getting you gifts even though you insisted all you wanted was everyone together and to have fun with them since for the longest time nobody ever even knew when your birthday was. 
What you didn’t realize was that the only person more worried than you about your gifts was Bucky.
Since he joined the team the two of you have gotten close, starting with his first training with the team where he very loudly told Steve about his disbelief that someone as young and small as you could actually be an asset to the team.
You quickly put him in his place by taking him down after less than two minutes of sparring, taking full advantage of his underestimating you because he “didn’t want to hurt a pretty little thing like you.”
Admittedly he was impressed and wasn’t shy about letting you know that, while the rest of the team snickered at his initial shock when you pinned him down.
You became friends after that, not as close as you’d like but friends nonetheless.
If you were honest with yourself you’ve been harboring a little crush on the supersoldier, but he’s never shown any interest so you resigned yourself to just being his friend.
Something that you did come to treasure, though, is your and Bucky’s late night talks.
It started with you walking in on him in the kitchen on a late night where you couldn’t sleep, nothing new to you, but the two of you barely talked other than acknowledging each other.
You took a bottle of water and left.
A couple of days later you ran into him again and you stood there in silence while you made yourself a cup of tea and then left for your room.
A few days later again he was just sitting there and said nothing as you made your tea, except this time you put a cup in front of him and silently took a seat next to him at the counter.
Two nights later when you arrived at the kitchen he was already there with a cup of tea in front of him and one in front of the seat next to him.
You didn’t want to assume it was for you, but you took a chance when you noticed it was the cup you always used, a blue mug with Stitch on it that says “Let’s get weird”. Your favorite in fact.
You hesitantly sat down next to him and, without you having to ask or without even looking at you, he told you that the nights you stay up late because you can’t sleep you tend to be more quiet during the team dinners and while you hang out afterwards.
You didn’t say anything in return and just sat there, trying not to overthink how much he seemed to watch you.
But the more nights you spent like that, the more you two talked and you gathered quickly that Bucky is a very observant person, nothing more.
You loved the time you spent together after dark where you’d talk about everything and anything, but come morning it was almost as if it never happened, which you came to accept.
It weirdly made the nights you spent talking even more special, which was almost every night.
But back to the present, you’re currently getting ready with Natasha and Wanda, who know much more than you about hair and makeup and are always happy to help you out with getting ready for Stark parties. 
You put on the black cocktail dress with rhinestones all over the corset and a slit down the left side, then the three of you make your way to the party room and you take a deep breath before entering.
Everyone is already there, all dressed up in fancy clothes as they all shout “Happy Birthday”.
You laugh and say hi to everybody while they all take turns hugging you, there’s not too many people but everyone important to you is there.
Even Laura and Clint’s kids are there, which you consider a second family at this point, since Laura always did treat you like a daughter.
You hate to admit that it's a nice party.
Knowing you, everyone makes an effort to not put you too much at the center of attention and you just go around talking to your friends like every other party.
Eventually time comes for the cake and, the moment you kind of dreaded, opening the gifts.
Since it's the first birthday you allowed the team to celebrate everyone decided to go all in for your gifts, which you picked up on from the very first gift you open.
Pietro got you a first edition of “The Picture Of Dorian Gray” which is your all time favorite book, Wanda and Maria got you a leather jacket and an amazing pair of boots that you knew were expensive because you were all out shopping together when you came across them.
Steve got you a gold heart-shaped locker with a picture of the team inside it, Natasha got you a charm bracelet with a little charm to represent everyone on the team, and Sam got you a cute necklace with your birth stone on it.
When you open Fury’s gift you start laughing since it's a gun, a SIG SAUER P226 to be precise, which is very Fury.
“It was my first gun when I joined SHIELD.” He says with a smile and you smile back, knowing how much thought he put into this gift.
You open Clint’s gift next, a bow and arrow that he already taught you how to use, and Laura got you a pair of diamond earrings.
Your heart melts when you open Lila, Cooper and Nathaniel’s gifts, respectively a friendship bracelet, an Avengers action figure of yourself and a Stitch plushie.
The three of them hug you tightly as you say thank you and now you only have two gifts left, Tony’s and Bucky’s, and they’re both little boxes. 
You open Tony’s next, thinking it’s some fancy necklace or earring but you frown when you see a car key.
“Is this the key to your car?” you ask Tony, knowing full well you’re holding the key to an Audi R8 Spyder, the car Tony’s let you borrow so many times you’re now wondering if he’s gifting you his spare set of keys.
“No.” He says casually “It’s the key to your car.”
You’re even more confused and simply stare at him with your mouth gaped, not really processing the information.
“Y-you… You got me a car?!” You almost yell out of shock and everyone else starts laughing at your antics when you start basically jumping up and down and hugging Tony, squealing like a little girl.
“Well, come on, let’s go see it!” Tony says enthusiastically after you’ve calmed down, and you get up, just as enthusiastic, but are stopped by Steve’s voice.
“Wait, wait. You have one gift left.” He says, picking up the small box and giving it to you. “It’s from Bucky.”
You were so pumped up by the car, you almost forgot about it and completely miss the mischievous look Steve gives Bucky and the murderous glare Bucky gives back.
You also miss Bucky starting to protest before you open his gift, but he instantly shuts up when he sees your face falling the second you open it.
It’s a small necklace with a blue rose in it, it really looks like something you’d give a little girl more than a 25 year old woman.
You look at it for a minute, running your finger on it before you raise your head and look at Bucky.
The whole room goes silent as they all watch you worriedly, everyone noticing immediately that tears are streaming down your face.
Nobody understands what’s happening and nobody knows how to react or what to do, it’s like they’re all frozen by the sight of you being vulnerable for the first time ever. 
Meanwhile Bucky’s heart is beating so loud he’s sure everyone around him can hear it, and he feels himself starting to panic at the thought of having ruined your birthday with that stupid gift.
Everybody else got you expensive gifts and all he did was get you a small, cheap necklace that reminded him of a story you briefly talked about once on one of your late night talks about a necklace you had as a kid.
He saw it at the mall while looking for a gift for you, remembering the sweet smile you had on your face when you mentioned it and the fleeting sad look he thought he saw when you told him you lost it when you were 12.
He was really proud of himself for that gift, but the more he saw the other gifts you got the more he regretted his choice, especially after Tony gave you a fucking car.
And now you were crying, not saying anything while just looking at him.
He doesn’t know what to expect from you at the moment, nobody does, he thinks you might yell, throw his gift back at him, tell him how much you hate it and him.
But you surprise everyone by throwing your arms around Bucky’s neck, hugging him tightly while crying into his shoulder.
You honestly forgot telling Bucky about that story and certainly didn’t expect him to remember it, especially since you always got the feeling that he didn’t care about your talks as much as you.
You just assumed that come morning he deleted everything you told him to make room for more important things, and you didn’t blame him.
But he didn’t.
What you didn’t tell him about the necklace is that your mom gave it to you because blue roses were her favorite, you had that necklace since you were born but you somehow lost it the day of her funeral.
That day you lost the two most important things in your life and cried yourself to sleep, and that was the last time you allowed yourself to be weak and cry.
Until today.
Bucky hesitantly wraps his arms around you, rubbing your back hoping to get you to calm down. He looks around at the rest of the team, panicking a little and not knowing what to do.
Everyone else is as clueless as he is, never having seen you in such a state before.
Bucky starts apologizing, his heart breaking at the sight of you crying, and he feels horrible that it’s because of him.
You shake your head quickly and pull away a little to look at him, wanting to reassure him you’re not sad or angry but incredibly happy, but words refuse to come. You take a deep breath to calm yourself and finally manage to speak.
“Thank you. You have no idea how much this means to me.” It’s quiet, but it’s something, and it’s enough to make Bucky let out a breath of relief at knowing you don’t hate him or his gift.
He brings you back in for another tight hug, almost forgetting about everyone else in the room as you hug him back without hesitation.
You’re honestly not even embarrassed at crying, all you care about at the moment is Bucky, his arms around you while he lets you bury your face in his neck, like you’ve been wanting to do for years now.
“Happy birthday, doll.” He whispers in your ear and, for the first time in 13 years, you really feel like it is.
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pelova4president · 3 months
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All eyes on you
Mapi León x Ingrid Engen x Fridolina Rölfo x Reader
All eyes on you II
summary~ Three of your teammates have an eye on you. And they aren’t shy to show you that they want you either.
!warnings! 18+ smut, making out, fingering?, explicit language
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They made it obvious, they wanted you. They kept giving you signals and hints but somehow you were just oblivious to their actions.
It started when you joined the team a few months ago. Frido started taking interest in you and helped you move in, putting your furniture together. Mapi and Ingrid took it on them to show you around the city, in the hopes to show you their bedroom eventually.
The move from England to Barcelona went a lot smoother than you would've thought. Your Spanish was still shit but most of the girls understood you and tried to talk back in their broken English. Keira and Lucy were still trying to master the language so there weren't much of use. Frido and Ingrid however were almost fluent in both so they helped with the translating. Mapi was trying to teach you some words but that wasn't going great.
Mapi and Ingrid were and item, everyone knew that and it wasn’t like they tried to hide it either. The couple almost always sat infront of you in the bus. Frido, Ingrid and Mapi took you in and offered you the empty seat in their four seater. Frido sat next to you and even though she preferred the window seat, but she’ll never admit that because she knows you do too, she offered you it.
While you and the Swede were watching a series, sharing EarPods with your head resting on her shoulder. The couple infront of you were having a heavy making out session. You couldn’t help but look up. And maybe you stared a bit too long, okay you definitely did. Ingrid pulled her girlfriend into the rough kiss, she was more dominant than you would’ve thought. Lost in your thoughts you hadn’t noticed how the couple had separated already and their eyes were now focused on you.
“You like the show?” Frido whispered in your ear. Waking from your trance you noticed how all their eyes were on you. You got caught red handed. With red cheeks you mustered a response, “Yeah- i mean like the uhh the blonde actress is really.. pretty and good right?”. The Barca players laughed at your embarrassed state.
"So you're into blondes eh?" Mapi commented looking at Frido and then you again. "Yeah- No, i like all. All women, blonde, brunette, both uh everything?" you rambled, eyes focused on the protein shake infront of you. "Good." you heard Ingrid say.
When you finally dared to look somewhere other than your shake you met Frido's eyes. And just when you ou thought your cheeks couldn't get any redder “We both know that i didn’t mean that show.” Frido smirked. You tried to hide your face into your hoodie but that only made her laugh harder.
All three of the women were getting more affectionate with you too, but that’s just how the Spanish culture is right. Frido would get you to sit in her lap on movie nights, her hands placing themselves on your thighs. Ingrid would walk next to you and place her hand on the small of your back and sometimes her hand would drop lower, to your ass. To say you didn’t like it would be a lie. All three of them were beautiful and just very hot, you couldn’t deny that. You honestly were flattered by all their attention.
When you scored your first Barca goal, all of the girls were over the moon for you. They knew you had a bit of a rough start, not scoring any goals in what felt like months. But now you’ve broken through that barrier with not only one but two goals in one game. Frido, assisting your first goal ran towards you with open arms. “You’ve done it!” she kissed your cheek.
Walking through the tunnel after fulltime Mapi approached you, her hand resting on your hip. “Scoring looks good on you amor.” she grinned. You hadn’t really processed the compliment and her seductive tone when her girlfriend joined you. “Quite a performance you put on out there. Wanna come over for a movie night later? Just you, us and Frido, you can choose the movie.” Ingrid asked expectedly. It sounded nice and you got to choose the movie, why not.
“Yeah, i’ll be there.” you agreed. “Perfect!” Ingrid kissed your cheek and took off with Mapi who sent a cheeky wink your way. With the couple still in your mind you walked towards your car.
"Be ready at eight, You just look pretty and i'll pick you up." you heard behind you. Frido was stood by her car, her hair still wet from the quick shower she just had. "Okay, thank you!" you yelled back waving goodbye to the blonde.
Frido kept her promise and picked you up. You were debating on what to wear, comfy or classy. Frido said to look pretty so a black dress would do. It wasn't exactly comfortble, it was short and tight but atleast you looked good. So good that even Frido couldn't help but comment on it. "You look fantastic. Don't know how i can keep my hands to myself all night when you're sitting next to me like that." she muttered under her breath, taking you all in. Her eyes traveled from head to toe, stopping at the hem of your dress.
"Well, thank you.. you look very good yourself" you said feeling like a some artpiece hung up in a museum. Frido hummed at that and her eyes met yours again. "Let's go beautiful." Frido placed her hand on the small of your back, closing your front door.
She walked you to her black car, one that suited Frido. It was a matt BMW and you could see that she took pride in it, she drove through the car wash atleast once every few days. Opening the passenger door for you and walking to the drivers seat she sat down. Frido wasn’t one for very loud Spanish music like the other girls in your team enjoyed, she liked background music. A little RnB or Jazz was her go to so that's what played on the background of your conversation.
“Are you excited?” she asked, one hand on the steering wheel and the other on the gear stick, her eyes were focused on the road. You didn’t immediately answer and she took her eyes off the road to take an expecting look at you. “Are you gonna be a good girl and tell me or?” the Swede raised her brow.
“Uh yeah, i’m excited. I’ve already got a movie picked out.” you said smiling. Frido grinned at that and placed her hands reassuringly on your thigh, squeezing it. "I'm sure Mapi and Ingrid are excited too." she hummed and began to move her hand higher. "They've been dying to get some alone time with you, away from all the girls you know" that was new to you. "Oh didn't know that." the blush creeping up on your cheeks betrayed your cool answer.
The car ride felt like an eternity to you. Frido kept her hand on your thigh, sqeezing or moving it when you said something to her. Your teammate was wearing black trousers and a white top, showing off her abs and tits. She was insanely goodlooking, there was no denying that. But now that she's sitting next to you holding the steering wheel like that, focused on the road and one of her hands teasing you, she was beyond attractive.
When you finally arrived she reached over you, stretching for a piece of gum. You could see right into her top, not that you minded, at all.
Both of you stepped out of the car and got into the lift to your teammates apartment. Frido took your hand in hers like it was something she's always done. Leading you to the couples house Ingrid opened the door almost immediatly. "You both look very good. Come inside." she greeted you. And while you walked inside where Mapi waited for you, you saw Frido whisper something to Ingrid.
Mapi was standig behind the kitchen island pouring herself a drink. "There you are amor, been waiting for a while now" she smirked at your flushed state. "Sorry, Frido told me to be ready at eight." you tried to apologize. "Don't worry, the wait was worth it" she walked over to you. "Would you like something to drink?" the Spaniard asked taking a sip from what you assumed was a martini.
The two Scandinavian girls joined not much later, both of them opting for a glass of red wine. They let you choose the movie liked they promised and you settled down. Ingrid pulled you inbetween her legs, you head resting on her chest. Mapi and Frido were sitting to the left of you.
Everything was fine, well you were turned on by the women but it wasn't something you haven't felt before around them. Whenever Ingrid went to take a sip from her glass she bent over, hold you by your hips and her hands stayed there. About an hour into the movie she started to play with the hem of your short dress, you obviously should've wore something more comfortable.
Tracing paterns on your thighs she whispered in you ear, "You wore that dress just for us, right.". Processing her words you turned your head around. "Frido said to look pretty, so yes?" Ingrid hummed at that, mostly satisfied with your answer. Ingrid never stopped teasing you and you couldn't help but rub your thighs together. Unbeknownst to you the three women exchanged glances at the action.
You excused yourself to the bathroom. Ingrid was doing this to you on purpose. They were open about their relationship and sex life but you didn’t know they were so open.
Going back into the living room Ingrid was filling her glass in the kitchen and Maria and Frido were having a conversation. You leaned against the kitchen counter next to the Norwegian, “Can i help you?” you asked. “You can be a good girl and go sit all nice and pretty next to Frido for me.” her hands were on your hips turning you to the couch where the two were sat.
Going to sit down next to Frido you got pulled into her lap, waiting nervously at what they had in store for you. “Are you enjoying yourself bebé?” the Spanish defender asked you curiously. You nodded furiously. “I think you could enjoy yourself a bit more tonight, no?” Ingrid said walking towards Frido who she gave another glass of wine. “You definitely could baby.” Frido took a sip of her drink.
Your eyes followed Ingrid who straddled her girlfriend. Mapi leaned in for a kiss when Ingrid stopped her, whispering something in her ear. The dark haired woman teasingly kissed the Spaniard behind her ear and down to her neck, leaving marks along the way.
Yet again, too caught up with the show infront of you you didn’t see the blondes hand creeping up under your dress. “Hmm do you like watching them?” Frido breathed. She pushed your dress up and teased you over the fabric of your panties. Feeling the wet spot on them she pressed harder. “So fucking wet already, haven’t even touched you.” she kissed up your neck.
You shut your eyes, the teasing they've been doing becoming too much. The woman behind you slowed her movements. “She’s getting all hot and bothered, don’t think she can wait much longer.” she talked to the other women. “Oh, she can wait just fine. You’ll be a good little girl for us, right.” Ingrid more stated than asked. Opening your eyes you nodded.
“Say you’ll be a good girl for us.” Frido kissed your neck, her hands starting to grope your tits. Lost in the pleasure you didn’t answer, “Say ‘i’ll be a good girl for you’ or i’ll stop and you won’t get anything at all.” the blonde demanded. You whined at her dominant tone “I’ll be good. I’ll be a good girl for you, just give me something.” you begged.
Frido took that as her sign to slide her hand inside your panties. “She’s so fucking pretty like this.” you heard Mapi say. Frido didn’t slide her fingers in yet, just teasing and lighty brushing past your clit. “J-just give me more please.” you said trying to get more.
You heard the three women laugh at your state. “Haven’t even started fucking you yet and you’re already gone, god you’re desperate.” Ingrid commented from across the couch. Her girlfriend was still under her, both set of eyes fixated on you. “Can’t wait to taste her.” Mapi kissed Ingrid.
“Maria why don’t you get her ready to take a cock then. I’m sure she’d appreciate that, don’t go easy on her though. You know how we want this evening to go.” Ingrid instructed Maria. They’ve been fucking planning this.
A/N setup done, next chapter will be a bit more Mapi and a whole lot more smut so don’t you worry. Feedback would be appreciated :) Got anything you want in the next fic, let me know!
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carolineshairtie · 2 months
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Mapi: This date is boring.
Ingrid: This isn't a date; I said I was going to the store.
Mapi: Then why did you invite me?
Ingrid: I specifically said "don't come with me" and you said "Fuck you, Engen, I do whatever I want" and followed me here.
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lowpolyshadow · 9 months
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forced to once again remember how shadow is laughing when he says "i think i figured out what the ultimate lifeform is! it might be you!"
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skipper1331 · 22 days
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fan girl // Alexia Putellas
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a/n: based off this request!
It was movie night at Alexia‘s, the girls seated around her living room as snacks and soft drinks were on the coffee table for everyone.
The girls had to decided to watch your new movie, all of them a big fan of your acting. Alongside you, big names like Margot Robbie and Ryan Reynolds - the movie was made to be a hit.
And Alexia had to admit that she watched every single one of your movies, most of the time more enjoying the view rather than the plot. It didn’t matter if she was the queen of football, she was madly crushing on you.
For once, Alexia wasn‘t getting Fan-girled but was Fan-girling herself. Something about you made her heart flutter, cheeks blushy and starstruck.
So, every time you appeared on screen, Alexia zoned out, comments from her friends falling to deaf ears, snacks long forgotten. She was completely in awe.
"That movie was mind blowing!" Claudia stated shocked after the movie had finished.
"That ending was very unexpected" Patri joined before the whole group talked about the movie. They discussed the ending, the plot, what they liked and didn‘t like, and the acting skills of each individual - simply everything.
-
A few weeks later, the call came that Alexia had to attend to an event, nothing knew for the Ballon D‘or winner you might think, but this event was different. Not necessarily from what would happen there but from the guests. Normally, some important people from the sports industry would be there, many media people or other important people in general - people Alexia knew or (dis)liked.
This time though, you would be there too. Alexia only knew this because she saw your instagram story - a window picture out of a plane, Barcelona marked as the destination - big headlines in the news.
In the following days, Alexia acted nervous and excited, sights you didn‘t see often. Mapi made fun of her because of that, even though she could understand Ale‘s excitement - who wouldn’t be excited to meet you?
-
"How do I look?" Alexia asked Mapi and Ingrid.
Both of them had agreed to help the Barcelona captain get ready as everything had to be perfect - perfect to meet you. She wanted to talk to you - that might be her only chance to ever talk to you, she didn‘t want to ruin that. She had to be subtle about approaching you yet attentive, respectful and kind. She couldn’t be some weird obsessed fan, she had to be herself - Alexia.
"Just be yourself" Mapi stated when Ale couldn’t stop rambling about you. What would you be wearing? How should she start a conversation? Would there even be an opportunity to talk to you? Are you nice? You probably are, no bad words about you in the world - everybody always talking highly of you.
"How am I supposed to be myself?! She‘s literally a Hollywood star!" Alexia defended herself. As if it was so easy to be herself.
"María is right, though" Ingrid added, "Ale, you‘re not just anyone, who knows maybe she‘s a football fan herself. Just start the conversation casually, be nice, ask her about her interests and everything should be fine" the Norse explained, trying to ease the Catalonians mind.
Alexia wasn‘t just anyone, she was a Barcelona player, World Cup winner, 2x Ballon D‘or winner and many other trophies winner, but most importantly, she was human. Her trophies didn‘t defy her as a person - she wasn’t arrogant or bragging about her achievements, instead she was a friendly, caring and supportive friend.
"Thank you"
-
Alexia attended the event, more nervous than usually.
She talked to the people she had to, conversations about football or other business stuff or talked to some people who she actually enjoyed talking to.
Yet all evening, she kept looking for you, not seeing you anywhere which disappointed her. She was looking forward to see you, for once not on tv.
When she went to the bar, ordering a drink, she had already lost hope, until she tensed up.
"Hola la reina" a voice beside her greeted, accent thick.
Tilting her head, she saw the gorgeous smile of you, "hi" she greeted, smiling shyly.
You had referred to her as la Reina.
"I have to admit, I’m a bit disappointed that I was only able to talk to you now" you said, taking a sip of your drink. Everything seemed so effortless when you did it.
"I‘m Y/N Y/L/N, big fan"
Shaking your hand, she replied "Alexia Putellas"
After that the conversation came floating by with an ease, all nervousness from the both of you washed away.
Alexia wasn‘t the only fan girl here, you fan-girled about her just as much, raised as an Barcelona fan since you were a little girl.
All night, you continued flirting with each other, discovering same interests and discussing topics from a-z, also not talking to anyone else but each other. It felt easy to talk to Alexia, no judgement at all as she listened to everything you had to say. She couldn’t care less if it was a random fact, even though you had seemingly very much of them (which she secretly absolutely adored) or if it was your opinion on whatever. She enjoyed hearing you talk, your opinions and points of view well explained.
At some point during the night, she asked "So, you‘re an football fan?"
"Oh yes, absolutely"
"Favorite club?"
"Real Madrid, obviously" you joked, her reaction hilarious - wide eyes, open mouth, look of disgust on her features.
"I‘m joking!" you laughed, "I’m a culer through and through"
"You almost gave me an heart attack!" she hit your arm playfully, continuing to talk about football. This time is was you who listened. The sound of Alexias voice angelic.
You loved how passionate she talked about her profession and how serious she got when she analyzed something, she was the perfect mixture of professionalism and passion - something you admired.
When the night came to an end, you walked her outside, waiting for her taxi to arrive.
"It was nice meeting you, la reina" you beamed, squeezing her hand as you had held it on the way out, so she wouldn’t get lost.
Girls thing.
"Likewise"
Looking at one another with googly eyes, no one realized that the taxi had arrived until the driver honked, bringing you back to earth.
"I would like to see you again, sometime?" you shifted nervously on your feet, eyes darting across her features. She was breathtaking.
"Maybe at the match next weekend?" Alexia didn’t expect you to say yes with your busy schedule and new upcoming projects but she tried it anyways. She really wanted to see you again.
"I will be there"
The midfielder‘s face lit up, the widest smile on her face, eyes sparkling as her heart jumped around happily.
"Good night, la reina and stay safe" you pressed your lips on the barcelona players cheek before you walked back inside with shaking hands. You had just kissed the famous Alexia Putellas’ cheek and it felt good!
Alexia on the other hand had crimson red cheeks, was breathing heavily as she touched completely dazed the spot were your lips had been seconds ago.
It seemed like you would stay for another few days in Barcelona. This wasn‘t the end. Maybe, for once, you wouldn't be playing a role in a romance film, but would be living your very own romance.
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ktgoodmorning · 28 days
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Silent Communications
(love language series- physical touch)
Mapi Leon x Reader
Inspired by the love language physical touch- The team doesn't know you and Mapi are dating and you struggle to keep it hidden throughout your away game travels
Words of affirmation felt too obvious of a choice for the Mapi fic. I swear that eventually I will manage to write something shorter and less fluffy but today is not that day. Anyways, I'd love any feedback or requests any one has, my inbox is always open.
The rest of the love language series:
Perfect. A.Bonmati x reader. Quality time.
Let me spoil you. C.Coll x reader. Giving and receiving gifts.
Broken. P.Guijarro. Acts of service.
You know I love you. A.Putellas. Words of Affirmation
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Masterlist
The team was unaware of your relationship with Mapi. Everyone knew you had been best friends for most of your lives and attributed your closeness to that. They knew you tended to be touchy and cuddly together but still never thought much of it because the two of you had always been that way. It also helped your case being Spanish. They were completely unaware that your relationship had turned romantic. They’d occasionally tease you for your closeness, but it didn’t bother you. You knew they meant no harm and often you were willing to join in joking.
Eight months ago, you and your best friend confessed your feelings for each other. Growing up together, you had only become closer as you got older. It didn’t surprise you. From the time you were a teenager, you knew your feelings for Mapi were different. For a while you couldn’t pinpoint why, it wasn’t until teammates would tease you about how you were “basically dating” that you realized it was true. Or at least you wanted it to be true. You learned to ignore those feelings, trying to preserve your friendship. It was more important to you to keep her close than to act on your feelings. However things changed when you had caught on that she might be feeling the same way. You’d catch her staring at you, looking at you differently than she used to. She’d always be doing little things to help you out- bringing you coffee, carrying your bag for you, buying you dinner. There were little touches here and there that just felt different. It was always small things but felt so big. 
The longer you noticed your best friend acting this way, the more it drove you crazy. One day when you were out to breakfast with Alexia, you decided to get her opinion on the matter. You were tired of trying to ignore your feelings. She knew Mapi just as well as you did, and you knew she’d be honest with you. When you asked her if she thought there was any chance of Mapi sharing your feelings, the older woman looked at you like you were crazy. “Isn’t it obvious?” she said. “I thought you already knew, that girl’s crazy about you.” 
From then on, your world changed. You left your breakfast date with Alexia to go straight to Mapi’s house- a place that was basically your second home. The two of you had a long conversation, spilling your hearts out to each other. You discussed what you wanted to do, how to move forward. Ultimately you had both decided you wanted to try dating but planned to take things slow, making sure you weren’t doing anything that could risk your friendship in the process. 
Things couldn’t have gone better. Your friendship transitioned seamlessly into dating. It was better than either of you could have imagined (and you both spent plenty of time imagining it). In the last eight months, you continued to grow closer in ways you hadn’t even known possible and were happier than you had ever been before. 
You had decided not to tell anyone about your relationship. It just seemed easier that way. If people knew about your growing romance you’d have to deal with the media, the criticism of teammates dating, the fans, and any outside opinions that didn’t matter to you. Neither of you wanted any of that, you just wanted each other. You didn’t intend to keep it a secret for this long but somewhere along the way you became accustomed to it and it just felt easier than breaking the news.
 A few of your closest friends, as well as each of your families, knew but that was it. It felt like it was only fair to tell Alexia since she had been the one to confirm Mapi’s feelings. Other than her, Patri and Pina were the only other ones on the team to know about your relationship. Before you had gotten better at sneaking around, they had walked in on you mid-makeout session on the middle of your couch. You had forgotten they were even coming over when you and Mapi had gotten a bit distracted. It’s safe to say, after that happened the pair of you were much more careful. Even though it wasn’t part of the plan, it was helpful having the three of them clued in. The group of five spent a fair amount of time together so not having to hide around them gave you a chance to relax. 
Typically, you and Mapi were good at sneaking around. Because of how close you had been prior to dating, nobody questioned most of the things you did. As long as you weren’t outwardly kissing or saying anything too cheesy, nobody thought much of it. The only time things became harder was when you were traveling as a team. When you traveled, unless you got roomed together, there was no solace of coming back together when training was over and getting to spend time with just the two of you. It was almost harder when you were around each other so much yet never in the way you wanted. 
~
You had been stuck on the bus far longer than you would've liked. Sometimes you were excited to join the other younger players, playing games and turning the bus ride into a social event. Today wasn't one of those days.  You weren’t sure where it was you were even going to be playing, you just knew you were exhausted and cranky. You took a seat by yourself in the front, not really interacting with anyone. Mapi was with the much louder group having fun in the back. She could tell you were tired and wanted to give you some space to sleep. She also knew you enough to know that if you were in a bad mood you were going to be clingy and she didn’t want to accidentally let everyone in on your secret. When there was a lull in conversation, Lucy questioned your girlfriend, giving her a suggestive look, “Mapi, where’s your partner in crime? We don’t usually see you two apart.” It was clear Lucy was teasing but also was genuinely curious as to why you weren’t hanging out with them. 
“She’s just taking a nap, probably trying to get away from you, idiota,” Mapi rolled her eyes, trying to cover up that she too was a bit concerned about you. It was unusual for you to isolate yourself. She sent you a quick text to check in with you but when she got no response, she decided she needed to come check on you herself. 
When the defender stood up, she knew more quips were coming her way. “Ooooh Mapi? Gotta go check on your girlfriend?” The way Mariona sing-songed this made it clear she was joking but Mapi still couldn’t help but panic. She awkwardly laughed and turned away from the other girls, hoping to hide her blush. Patri and Pina shared a quick look as they knew the comment from Mariona would leave their friend panicking. They did everything they could to hold in their giggling while Alexia glared at them, hoping to make them stop. Nobody else seemed to notice this as they went back to their karaoke and left Mapi alone to join you. 
You felt someone sit in the seat next to you, immediately recognizing the scent as your girlfriend. Your eyes were shut, trying to sleep, but failing. The side of her leg pressed up against yours and she gently placed her hand on your knee. It was clear to her that you weren’t asleep because of how much you were moving around, trying to get comfortable. “Hey,” she spoke gently, rubbing her thumb against your knee to get your attention. You slowly opened your eyes and Mapi greeted you with a soft smile. “You okay? You don’t seem like yourself.” she spoke softly, voice full of worry. 
You nodded, “yeah, just tired. I didn’t sleep very well last night so I was hoping to sleep on the bus.” You rubbed at your eyes, starting to accept that it wasn’t going to happen. 
“Here I’ll stay with you,” you couldn’t help but be grateful at the offer. 
Still, you tried to protest, “Maps, no. Go have fun with your friends, I know you like to keep busy on the bus. I’ll be okay.” 
The look on your girlfriend’s face made it clear she’d be staying by your side, “Hmm no thanks. We’ll put some headphones on, you can snuggle up against me, it’ll be great. It’ll put you to sleep in no time,” the way she spoke made it clear it was a statement, not a question. It’s not like you would complain, it did sound pretty great. She took your silence as agreement and pulled out her headphones, passing one to you. By the time you had put it in, she had put on a playlist that the two of you had made together. Her arm wrapped around you so you could place your head on her shoulder and use her as a pillow. You couldn’t believe how quickly you fell asleep. Mapi had that effect on you, always putting you at ease. 
At some point, your girlfriend had also drifted off. You woke up, still snuggled into her, with her head resting on top of yours, her one arm still around you, and her free hand interlocking yours. This was by far the most comfortable you’d ever been on the bus. You carefully grabbed your phone so as to not wake up Mapi. You had some texts in your group chat with you, Mapi, Alexia, Patri, and Pina. First was a picture from Patri taken from the back of the bus where you could see the tops of your heads lying against each other, you shared earphones hanging between you. It was followed by a text from Pina, “better be careful if you want everyone to keep thinking you’re ‘just friends’ ;) “. You smiled to yourself, knowing she was right, but being too happy right now to care. All you could do was close your eyes and drift back to sleep.
When you eventually got to your hotel and got off the bus, the two of you seemed to be the hot topic of discussion. Everyone was teasing you, first for Mapi giving up her precious social time for you, then for how closely the two of you had cuddled up, and finally for the way your hands remained interlocked as Mapi led you off the bus and into the hotel lobby. 
The only downside to Alexia knowing about your relationship was that she knew better than to let you two be roommates on trips like this. You were paired up with Bruna which you really couldn’t complain about, and Mapi got paired with Mariona. With neither of your roommates knowing about your relationship, finding time alone together was about to get much more difficult. 
~
At breakfast the next morning, you went to sit down next to your girlfriend. She stood up to greet you with a hug and a soft kiss on the top of your head. It was likely a bit too long of a hug to be considered friendly but somehow no one commented. Alexia just shook her head, smirking to herself at how obvious you were being. Sitting down at their table, you tried to leave space between you while you ate so as to not raise suspicion, but you should’ve known that it wouldn’t work. Mapi always had to have a hand on you in some way. It was usually subtle, but it sure didn’t make hiding things any easier. You appreciated it though. You liked how she could be talking to anyone and you still knew she was thinking of you. That’s what was happening now as she settled into conversation with Alexia. The silent communication between your touches was better than any words could express. 
Your next chance you got to be together wasn’t until after training, back at the hotel. Patri and Pina invited you both to come hang out in their room with them. That’s how you found yourself, laying against Mapi’s chest while she and Patri played FIFA. Her arms wrapped around you tightly while she held her controller in front of you. “Ay, (y/n), did you only come over so you could have time to be all cuddly without the rest of the team around?” Pina quipped at you while you both continued to watch the game, she was somehow both joking and also entirely serious. 
Before you could respond, your girlfriend spoke up for you, “hey just be happy this is all we’re doing. We could be making out right now if we wanted to.” She somehow managed to hold you tightly while still playing a close game with Patri. You giggled at how she kept moving under you the more involved in the game she got. “Amor sit still! You’re blocking the screen!” Mapi whined at you, only making you giggle more at how quickly her tone changed. You ended up moving further down to cuddle into her leg so that she could still see. She shot you a glance to make sure you knew she wasn’t actually annoyed with you but relaxed when she saw your soft smile. “Comfortable?” she chuckled lightly at how you burrowed into the side of her leg. 
“Did you really have to ask, amor?” you smiled at her before turning back to watch the game she was playing. 
All of the sudden you heard the sound of the door opening, making you jump. However when you saw Alexia’s blonde hair round the corner, you quickly relaxed again. “Ooh the lovebirds are here, are you guys just here so you can makeout?” She shot you a smile knowing that you two would always spare them from seeing you be too handsy.
You rolled your eyes playfully at your captain, “you guys always say that but we’ve really only made out in front of you once and it wasn’t even on purpose. And you weren’t even there, Ale!” You sat up a little more so you could see her face. 
“Gracias a Dios!” the blonde shot back at you, mirroring your smile. 
Deciding to have some fun with this while also taking advantage of this limited time to show affection, you decided to try something. “You know, Ale, if you wanted us to be like that, all you had to do was ask. We sure can…” As you said this, you moved back up in Mapi’s lap and started to slowly leave kisses along the side of her neck. You didn’t want to distract her too much from her game but you also knew how much she’d be enjoying it. Plus you loved a chance to annoy your friends. This time, it was Alexia who started the retching noises. You felt your girlfriend tilt her head to the side to give you more room to continue down her throat, clearly having fun with this. Pina quickly joined in the sound effects when she saw that you weren’t planning on stopping. Finally Patri wanted to know what was going on and took a quick look over at you. Of course she had no choice but to join her friends in their shouting. 
What you hadn’t planned on was that the whole scene had distracted Patri just enough to allow your girlfriend the opening she needed to win their game. “Yes!! I won!” You broke apart from her throat as she suddenly shouted. The two of you high fived and shared a real kiss in celebration of your unplanned teamwork. Everyone else in the room just groaned at the two of you, Patri flopping back onto her bed, cursing in Spanish in protest of her loss. You just settled back into Mapi, sharing a couple more short pecks as you did so. 
~
The next day was your match. When you did your morning walk as a team, nobody seemed to notice the way you and Mapi had linked pinky fingers as you went. You wanted to be close and to spend it with her but you knew that holding hands on your team walk would be too much. The pinkies worked perfectly because nobody else could see it past the long sleeves of your jackets. 
The match didn’t go as easily as everyone hoped it would. The score was tied 1-1. Barcelona had been winning most of the game but around minute 75, the other team equalized and both teams had been fighting hard for a winning goal ever since. Exhausted was an understatement. You and Mapi were both starters and were in the entire game. All that was on your mind was scoring. You had to. It was 2 minutes into injury time when Aitana made eye contact with you. She was running the ball up the field and you could tell exactly what her plan was as she did so. She slotted the ball through three defenders and directly to your feet. With one touch you sent the ball sailing past the keeper and into the back of the net. The crowd erupted and before you even had time to process, Mapi had run straight to you, beating everyone else as they all headed your way. Immediately Mapi scooped you into her arms, picking you up as she hugged you in celebration. You knew your other teammates had also surrounded you, but to you, it felt like just you and your girlfriend, alone in the middle of the pitch. She continued to hold you up, kissing your cheeks repeatedly. Your other teammates almost got bored of trying to celebrate you because of how much Mapi was keeping you to herself as the game wrapped up. You all made your way around the pitch to thank the fans, while your girl kept you at arms reach, overwhelmed with pride for you. 
The two of you were the last ones to enter the changing room, walking hand in hand pulled into her side. Lucy noticed this immediately and couldn’t help but comment, “Jesus, Mapi are you ever gonna share her with us?” You could already see your girlfriend starting to blush as you made eye contact. “Do we get to celebrate with her at all tonight or is she all yours?” The rest of the room laughed and added their own comments but you and Mapi were lost in each other’s stare, having a silent conversation among yourselves. 
You gave her hand a tight squeeze, encouraging her to do what you knew you were both thinking. “Alright you caught us,” the defendender sighed, “we’ve been dating for almost eight months now.” You held up your joined hands as if it were proof to show everyone (not that anyone needed it at this point). The room immediately interrupted into cheers. Of course it did, everyone knew how perfect you were for each other. If you had been best friends almost your entire lives, of course you’d make a great couple too. You and Mapi just smiled at each other, giving her hand another squeeze, trying to communicate that this was the right move. You didn’t even notice everyone around you until you were tackled into a group hug with you two at the center of it. It was exactly where you wanted to be- holding onto your girlfriend tight while all your best friends piled in around you, celebrating your love. It was everything you could ever imagine. Mapi was everything you could ever imagine.
The rest of the love language series:
Perfect. A.Bonmati x reader. Quality time.
Let me spoil you. C.Coll x reader. Giving and receiving gifts.
Broken. P.Guijarro. Acts of service.
You know I love you. A.Putellas. Words of Affirmation
Masterlist
Feedback and requests are always welcome! :)
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mariatesstruther · 3 months
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just a reminder yall that buying the tlou 2 remaster is supporting neil, which is supporting israel and its genocide against palestinians!
i love the tlou world as much as anyone else, but financially diverting away from anyone/thing/company supporting israel is one of the simplest and easiest ways palestinians have asked us to help. i hope we all consider boycotting the remaster and pirating s2
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abbyromanoff · 4 months
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could u do a golden retriever/black cat dynamic with maria or nat, where R is the golden retriever so everyone assumes they’re the bottom, but its actually the complete opposite?
GOLDEN GIRL
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PAIRINGS: Maria Hill x reader
WORD COUNT: 859
WARNINGS: smut, car sex, bottom!reader, subspace, Mommy (M), if yall can’t tell i have mommy and daddy issues with the amount of mommy/daddy kinks i write, innocent!R, fingering, pet play, public sex, cunnilingus, making out, dirtbag!Maria, praise kink, degrading kink, kinda dumbficfation, think that’s all :)
NO ONE IS PERMITTED TO STEAL, COPY, OR REBLOG MY WORK AS THEIR OWN!!
I COMPLETELY FORGOT TO MAKE IT BOTTOM!MARIA 😭😭 MY NEXT MARIA FIC WILL MAKE UP FOR IT ANON I PROMISE
“Are you sure about this?” You sat on the woman’s lap, nervous glances being sent each way. Her hand came to your cheek, her thumb rubbing small, gentle circles to ease your fear.
“Of course, my love. I promise you, no one’s going to see us.” The car had tinted windows, blocking anyone’s insight but gifting you the ability to see anyone nearby.
“But my parents-“
“They won’t notice you’re gone, okay? We won’t get caught.” You hesitantly agreed, sucking in a breath as you allowed her to guide your hips against her waist. Her jeans teased your covered cunt, the cold, metal button sending shocks through your body and causing you to whimper. Your grip fell upon her shoulders, your panties being pushed to the side by Maria’s wandering fingers.
“Pinky promise?” She linked her pinky with yours, kissing the tip before doing the same to your lips, leaving you with a goofy grin and cheeks bright red.
“Pinky promise.” You trailed your hands down, asking for permission with your eyes before you dipped your hands beneath her shirt, cupping her breasts and choking out a moan as her thumb pressed against your clit. She smirked, leaning forward as she connected her chapped lips with the skin of your neck, creating a suction that left dark markings along the area, and she knew you’d whine and groan about it later on. If your parents saw, they’d kill her. They never liked her in general, many people don’t, but knowing she was having sex with their child and ruining their sweet doves' innocence would only cause harsher amounts of bile in their throats.
“Did that feel good?” She asked when receiving a loud moan, your lips parting as your hips sped up. Her fingers teased your hole, dipping in and out in anticipation that riled you up.
“Mhm!” You bit your tongue to silence the threatening sound, but she wasn’t having it.
“No, baby, I want to hear you.” You threw your head back, but she slowly eased you forward by your chin, and your gaze soon met her hazy one. The windows began to blur along with your mind, and drool trailed on your lip.
“Awh, has my puppy gone dumb already? I thought you were my smart little mutt, I guess I was wrong.” You shook your head quickly. She hissed as you tugged on her nipples accidentally, but you barely even noticed.
“No, I-I’m ‘mart, Mommy.” She hummed, and you could tell she didn’t believe you. You stuffed your head in her neck, sniffing her sweet scent with a smile.
“Mommy’s dumb pup, huh? Is that what you are, sweetheart?” You sniffled and shook your head once again, whimpering as two fingers slowly eased into you. You mumbled out your denial, but she only chuckled your way.
“Shh, just bounce on Mommy’s fingers.” You did as told, whispering incoherent pleas as she added a third finger. She shushed you every time you tried to speak, insisting you weren’t of the intelligence level to form a functional thought.
“M-Mommy- g’nna…cum.” You told her, earning a pout of her lips in response. She pulled on your hair, forming a ponytail as she did so. Allowing your head to loll back as she kissed her way up to your ear, nibbling softly on the skin as she spoke,
“You better not fucking cum. Only I can give you permission, got that?” You nodded slowly, crying out with a pained sob as she forced you to ride her faster. She repeatedly hit your g-spot, and you could’ve screamed from the large amount of pleasure she gifted you.
“You think you can decide that on your own, hm? You think Mommy doesn’t matter anymore?”
“No, Mommy, I- I didn’t me-mean to-“
“You don’t need Mommy’s help anymore, is that it? Are you suddenly a big girl, you can think on your own?” You fought the coil building in your stomach with hopes of her approval.
“I-I need you, I do! I nee’ yo’ so b-bad, Mommy!” She chuckled darkly, letting go of your hair and interlacing a hand with yours. She slowly eased you off of her, and you whined pitifully as a result. She guided you to rest on the floor, her body towering over yours as she sat in front of you.
“That’s it, good girl.” She dragged out the praise. “Now, get to work, we don’t have all night.” She guided your face to her now bare skin and your lips met her clit in an urgent manner, desperate to feel her cum all over you.
You were unable to notice the camera aiming in your direction, or the crowd erupting out of the doors that you were parked in front of. But she did. She noticed everything, but she denied letting you do the same. But that was okay, you’d do anything she wanted. It was only fair for how well she took care of and protected you. After all, she was your Mommy, she’d go to any extent to keep you safe, and you’d go to any extent to make her as happy as you could.
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literaryavenger · 4 months
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I love you and I hate it - part 2
Summary: After your fight with Bucky, you put all your efforts into avoiding him, convinced that your friendship is over. Bucky, however, has other plans.
Pairing: Best Friend!Bucky Barnes x Female!Reader
Warnings: Reader being dramatic. Angst. Language maybe. Minimal use of Y/N. Fluff. My poor attempts at being funny.
Word Count: 4.5K
A/N: I promise I didn't mean to make it this long, but I couldn't help myself, again, and I didn't want to end on another 'cliffhanger' so here it is! hope you like it!
Part 1
Masterlist
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Bucky can't believe what he just heard... You like him?
No, you used the word ‘love’. You love him.
Do you love him?
Certainly, he would’ve noticed if you did... Right? He is a trained assassin, he was taught how to see beyond people’s words and actions.
And he knows you, you can deny it all you want, but he knows you better than anyone. He knows you better than he knows himself.
And if he’s being honest, you know him better than anyone ever has, Steve included.
You feel safe, you feel calm. You feel like the peace he’s always wanted, the quiet he needs.
You feel like home. In a platonic way, of course.
Right?
His thoughts of you are interrupted by Sharon’s voice. He didn’t even realize he was back at the party.
"Where did you go?" she asks and, suddenly, her grip on his arm was just a little too tight for his liking. But it was probably nothing.
"I went to check if Y/N was okay."
"Oh." something in her voice felt wrong, but Bucky tried to ignore it, that is until what she said next.
"Why would you even care about her? All she does is embarrass you like before. She’s useful to no one, I heard the only reason she’s even on the team is because she slept her way to it." she laughed like it was the funniest thought in the world, and Bucky couldn’t ignore it anymore.
Not only was she saying hurtful, untrue things about his girl, but she has the audacity to laugh at her own cruelty?
"How dare you?" he does his best not to yell, but his tone still startles Sharon. "Y/N is the best agent in all of Shield, that’s why she got in the team! She’s not an embarrassment, she’s a valued member of our family and she’s my best friend! Of course I care about her, she’s the most important person in my life! Don’t ever talk about her that way again."
Sharon seems shocked at his words but, looking around, she realizes people are starting to stare so she tries her best to defuse the situation. "Alright, I’m sorry, I won’t say things like that again. Let’s just calm down and have a nice rest of the evening, ok?"
In his head Bucky knew her request was reasonable, he could forget about this and keep having fun with his girlfriend. But in his heart he just knew he couldn’t let it go.
The words were coming out of his mouth before he can stop them, not that he even wants to.
"You know what, Sharon? This isn’t working. We have to break up." He doesn’t even give her a chance to say anything before he’s turning around and making his way to his room.
Meanwhile, on the roof, Steve’s trying to talk you down the ledge. Metaphorically speaking, obviously. 
"He hates me, Steve." you can't stop the tears.
"Stop saying that, sweetheart, he doesn’t hate you."
"You saw what happened at the party, the way he looked at me. And he heard me say that I love him and walked away like it was nothing." You sniffle. "If he didn’t hate me before, this certainly pushed him off the edge."
Steve has nothing to say to that, he knows Bucky doesn't hate you, but he also knows that you’re too stubborn to hear any reason, especially not right now when you're in the eye of the tornado and can't see a way out.
Right now you need a friend and shoulder to cry on, usually Bucky would take on that role, but, given the circumstances, Steve decides to step up and be that friend.
He wraps his arms around your crying body and holds you as you let it all out. Neither of you say anything else, the only sounds in the dark of the night being your sobs, until eventually you calm down and after a few moments of silence Steve glances down to see you fell asleep. 
Not wanting to wake you he carefully picks you up and makes his way to the elevator.
When he gets to the floor you both reside in he finds Sam and Natasha chatting at the kitchen counter, probably about to go to bed after coming up from the party.
Sam gives him a confused look, while Nat seems to understand what is going on right away as she moves without saying a word, walking ahead of Steve towards your room.
She opens the door for him and walks in behind, moving the covers back as he lays you on your bed as carefully as he can, and then Nat delicately takes your heels off before covering you with the duvet.
As they’re leaving your room the door opposite yours opens, revealing a hopeful Bucky but when he sees it’s not you, his face becomes stoic once again. He’s about to ask where you are when Natasha beats him to the punch.
"Leave her alone, Barnes. You’ve hurt her enough already." Is all she says before she steps into her own bedroom.
Bucky looks to his best friend for help but, at his confused face, the blonde super soldier just shakes his head in disappointment and walks away without a word.
Bucky stands there for a few minutes, just staring at your door like he's gonna will you to open it and talk to him.
He sighs and goes back to his room where he spends the next few hours overthinking about you and this whole night, eventually falling into an uneasy sleep.
The next morning when you wake up you feel at peace for about 10 seconds before the events of last night hit you like a truck, and all you can feel is humiliation.
How can you face the team after they witnessed your fight with Bucky?
How can you face Steve after he saw you at your most vulnerable and, apparently, carried you to bed after you cried yourself to sleep?
How can you face Bucky after he heard you say you love him and he walked away from you?
You can’t, that’s the answer.
Should you just move out? Just quit the team, ask Hill to be reassigned? Maybe you could even get transferred to another country...
You’re not overreacting, right? This is a very embarrassing situation and you have every right to want to run away from all of it.
As you’re making up an escape plan in your mind you hear a knock on your door, followed by Steve’s voice. "Hey, are you awake? We just want to make sure you're okay…"
You try to be as silent as you can, slowing down your breathing praying he’ll think you’re sleeping.
You can hear him exchange some muffled words with what sounds like Natasha, and then you hear their footsteps as they walk away, so you let out a relieved sigh.
Okay, step one is definitely getting out of this room, it’s just the most obvious place where to look for you.
You get up and out of your awfully classy dress, take a shower being sure to clean away all the makeup from last night and put on the most comfortable sweats you own.
Just as you’re opening the door you can see Bucky opening his about to get out and, in a panic move, you run back inside your room and slam the door shut.
Very subtle, yes.
You rest your back against the door and can hear him sigh and then walk away.
You wait a few minutes, just to be sure, and then relax a little. Your plan was to go to the gym and work out a bit, but now all you can think about is getting the hell out of this compound.
You grab your purse, make sure to have your phone and keys in it and open the door, making sure no one’s around before getting out.
You’re practically running, taking the stairs for good measure, and in a flash you’re at the garage. You jump in your car and drive away as fast as you can without breaking the law, not even knowing where to go.
Once you’re in the city you stop at a cafe for breakfast near your favorite book store, the one you and Bucky have visited together a hundred times.
Okay, stop that. No more thinking about Bucky.
You spend the rest of the day just going from one store to the other, stopping to have lunch at the diner you always go to when you’re in the city, and trying not to kick yourself for not being able to stop thinking about Bucky.
Seriously, why can’t you stop thinking about him?
It doesn’t help the fact that every one of your favorite places has at least a hundred and twelve memories of Bucky.
God, have you ever gone anywhere on your own in the last two years?
The more memories come to mind the more you think that maybe transferring wouldn’t be such a bad idea. Go somewhere new, get a fresh start.
When it starts getting dark you decide to drive back to the compound, but when you park and turn the car off you can’t find it in yourself to get out.
You take out your phone, which you’ve been ignoring all day, and go through all the messages of your worried friends, hating yourself a little more when you catch yourself looking for his name in your notifications.
Just as you’re about to answer Tony’s texts first, you get a call from Steve. You stare at your phone, unsure if you can stomach answering him right now, but your decision is rendered moot when someone taps against your car window.
Your head snaps towards it and you let out a breath of relief when you see Steve standing there, holding his phone and using it to tap on your window again.
You close your eyes for a second but resign to your fate as you gather your things and get out of the car.
When you lock your car you turn to see that Steve moved to be leaning on the trunk of your car, so you join him and wait for him to say something, not knowing what to say yourself.
"So," he starts, with his arm folded in front of his chest and looking at his shoes "you’re avoiding all of us now?" You let out a sigh, feeling bad for hurting his feelings.
"I’m sorry, Steve. I just…" you can’t even look at him as you talk, so you just look ahead of you at all the cars "I’m just embarrassed. After everything that happened last night, I don’t know… God, you even carried me to bed like a child." you cover your face with your hands.
You finally look at him when you hear him chuckling. "That’s what friends do, Y/N. They lean on each other." he bumps your shoulder with his playfully.
"I know we’re not as close as you and Bucky, but I am your friend too. I’m not gonna judge you for last night, I just want to make sure you’re okay. That’s what we all want. You made us worry that you might run away on us." He says the last part as a joke, but you can’t help looking away from him.
That’s exactly what you wanted to do.
You bite your lip as he keeps looking at you and you feel like he can see the gears turning in your head, like your thoughts are so loud and your guilt so visible that he knows right away he was right on the money.
"Y/N…" it’s almost a warning, but you still can’t find the courage to look at him. "You were seriously thinking of running away?!" he seems almost shocked.
"Okay, it’s not like I’m a teenager running away in the middle of the night after a fight with her parents!" you finally look at him. "I was just considering… I don’t know, maybe asking for a transfer?"
"So you actually want to leave the team just because you had a fight with Bucky?" He scoffs.
"It’s not just the fight, Steve, he knows I love him and he doesn’t even care!" You yell before sighing and lovering your voice.
"Do you realize how much that hurts? And now I’m supposed to, what? Just go back to how things used to be? Pretend like nothing happened? Even if we’re not friends anymore, he lives across the hall from me! I’m bound to see him and it’s gonna hurt every fucking time!" You’re almost crying, again, but you hold back not wanting to go through that again and you look away.
"I know it hurts, trust me, sweetheart, but… what about us?" you look at him again as he goes on. "We’re your team too. We’re your friends, we’re your family... You can’t just leave us. I'm not saying it's gonna be easy, but we can help you make it better. We all care about you a lot." It’s honestly a miracle you’re not crying already. You feel him take your hand, but don’t look away from his face.
"Please let us help you." you squeeze his hand and nod, not trusting your voice not to break and the flood to hit as soon as you open your mouth.
He smiles at you and you can’t help but do the same. "Good. Then let’s go up and have dinner like we always do." He starts walking and taking you with him, his hand still in yours.
While you’re waiting for the elevator you can’t hold yourself back as you turn to him and give him a tight hug. "Thank you."
He hugs you back just as tight. "Anytime, rookie." you snort and let go of him, giving him a punch in the arm you’re sure he didn’t even feel as he laughs with you.
When you get to the big kitchen most of the team is already there and you sit down next to Natasha while Steve sits at her other side.
The seat next to you is quickly occupied by Sam as he bings the pizza to the table. He gives you a side hug and squeezes your arm in sympathy but aside from that nobody even mentioned what happened last night, which you're grateful for.
You eat like always, having conversations, laughing and teasing each other like normal, you didn’t feel like anyone was pitying you and you realized Steve was right: these people are your family, you could never leave them.
And, as you watch Loki and Peter trying to make you laugh by messing with Thor’s hair, putting tiny umbrellas in it while he's not looking, you just know they’re gonna help you through everything.
What makes you sad to notice is that one brooding super soldier is missing, though you don’t bring it up for fear of opening that particular door.
And that’s how you spend the next few weeks: avoiding anything and everything that has to do with Bucky, including the man himself.
You start training with Natasha and realize how easy Bucky went on you.
You do more missions with Sam and Steve and realize that missions aren't as fun for everybody as they were for you and Bucky.
You hang out during your down time with pretty much everyone and realize that you couldn’t have as much fun with everyone as you had with Bucky.
So yeah, as much as you could avoid Bucky and talking about him to anybody, he lived rent free in your head.
Fun, huh?
It also didn’t help the look that Steve gave you every time you basically ran out of a room as soon as you caught a glimpse of your former best friend. 
Everybody noticed the change in your friendship, but it felt like they all took a silent oath to not mention anything to either of you, and you were glad they were respecting your choice to stay away from Bucky.
He, on the other hand, was going crazy.
He hasn’t seen you in weeks, except for those few seconds before you realize he’s in the same room and run away.
He doesn’t hear your voice unless he’s eavesdropping on you with someone else, but even then he never hears his name come out of your mouth.
Nobody will tell him anything about you, the only thing he can get out of Steve is ‘she’s okay, just give her time’.
He’s been trying his best to give you the space you need, but he feels like he’ll lose his mind if he doesn’t hear you say his name soon.
It’s been a month of successfully and not so subtly avoiding Bucky.
There was one time where, as the team about to land for a mission, he got much too close to you for your liking and you thought he was about to say something so you grabbed a parachute and quite literally jumped out the jet, then walked the rest of the way to the Hydra base.
Everyone had to wait for you, some annoyed, but most found the situation too amusing to be bothered by it.
Anyway. 
You’re at the gym for an early morning workout, a habit you took to when you started avoiding Bucky.
You know he usually stays up at night. Occasionally because he still gets nightmares, usually because his overthinking mind tortures him until early hours. So he uses mornings to sleep in when he doesn’t have missions.
You’re on the treadmill when you hear the doors of the gym open behind you but think nothing of it, assuming it’s just Steve replacing his morning run with a workout because it’s too hot to run outside.
When you don’t hear him say anything, you’re about to turn your head to see who it is, but before you can do anything you feel two hands, one cold and one hot, on your waist.
You squeal when they pick you up and take you away from the treadmill, setting you down on the ground in front of it before turning off the machine.
"Bucky, what the fuck?! I could’ve gotten hurt!" you were so shocked you didn’t even fully realize you were actually talking to the person you’ve spent so much time and effort avoiding, or that you were walking backwards while Bucky was getting closer to you.
"Oh please, I’d never let you get hurt." he’s sounds almost amused, like this is a normal thing between you two, but the truth is he’s just happy that you’re actually talking to him.
When your back hits the wall you realize too late that it’s Bucky in front of you and suddenly you’re looking around you to find a way to escape. But all you find is that he’s successfully trapped you between the wall and his body, his hands on the wall at either side of your head.
You swallow hard and if he notices he doesn’t say anything, but your brain is too busy registering the warmth of his body so close to yours to even be ashamed right now.
"Is this the only way I’ll get to talk to you now?" you almost miss his question, your eyes snapping up to meet his and, where you expected to see a smug look at having caught you not only off guard but also ogling, you found a frown and a slight pout.
Something about the hurt on his face stopped you from lying or straight up kicking him so he’d move and you could run away.
No, Bucky was your best friend, you’ve always felt the need to be honest with him ever since that first day, and even now you owe it to him to tell him nothing but the truth.
"I just need time." You hoped he understood.
"How much more time do you need?" Apparently not.
"I don’t know, can’t you just be patient?" You can't believe you really have to ask him this.
"It’s been a month, doll, I think I’ve been plenty patient. Are you planning on avoiding me forever?"
"Not forever… just… I don’t know." If you were being honest with yourself, you didn’t know how long you would’ve kept on avoiding him.
You were so busy doing the actual avoiding that you didn’t take the time to think about when you’d be able to stop.
You let out a sigh, but didn’t look away from his eyes for a second. He needs to know you meant every word you're about to say. "I was hurting, Bucky. I still am. I get that you have a girlfriend-"
"I broke up with her." he interrupts you.
"You… What?" you weren’t expecting that. "When?"
"The night of our fight. I would’ve told you sooner but it was hard to catch you, you know, with you avoiding me and everything."
You almost lost your train of thought, but it didn’t matter that he was single, he was still the first one to walk away, why was it so wrong for you to do it now?
"It doesn’t matter… I know you don’t owe me anything, but you walked away from me. From my feelings." you can see Bucky’s confusion so, before he can say anything, you explain yourself.
"That night on the roof. I know you were there, you heard me say that I loved you and you walked away like it was nothing. Like I was nothing. I know you don’t like me like that, and I can live with that in time, but it hurt. It still hurts." you don’t know what you were expecting him to say, but it definitely wasn’t he says next.
"Do you remember the day we met?" you furrow your brows in confusion but he waits for you to nod before he keeps going. "We’ve never really talked about it, have we? It's ironic since we’ve talked about pretty much every topic we could possibly come up with. But that day, you introduced yourself and I just got up and walked away. Kind of what you’ve been doing this past few weeks."  he chuckles a bit and you have the impression he's getting closer to your face, but you're probably just imagining that.
"Yeah, I thought I did something wrong, but you were just a rude bitch." he laughs and you can’t help but smile.
"I’m sorry about that, I just… the second I saw you I felt weird. And when you talked to me it was too much, I couldn’t handle it. I didn’t know what I was feeling and my brain just screamed at me to get out, so I did. Then you came to my door and said all those nice things and that weird feeling started to feel more and more comfortable as you talked. It was nice. Then we became friends and I guess I just dismissed that feeling as friendship. It was a different type of friendship that I’d never had... But then again I’ve never been this close to a woman. Emotionally speaking, of course." His hand comes to cup your cheek and you can’t speak, so he takes the opportunity to say everything he needs to say.
"This month has been hell for me, doll. I’ve missed you more than I’ve ever missed anybody in my entire life. Not being able to spend time with you, joke around, talk to you, barely even see you. It's been driving me insane. Being away from you for so long made me realize what that feeling was. You’re not just my best friend, you’re my person. You’re my calm, and my reason. You’re my happiness, my home. You’re the love of my life."
"What?" you're basically whispering, so quietly you’re sure he wouldn’t have heard you if he didn’t have super hearing.
"I love you too, doll. I love you." he holds your face in his hands "I love you."
You feel like your brain shut down all of a sudden. You barely know how to breathe, let alone talk. All you can do is stare at him, the look he's giving you making you weak in the knees.
"You’re killing me here, doll. For the love of god, say something, angel." The nickname seems to snap you out of it, and there's only one thing in your mind left to ask.
"If you love me, why didn’t you tell me on the roof?" He let out a deep sigh, you can feel his breath on your lips, but you try your hardest to focus on his words and not his lips.
"For one I was still with Sharon. And I didn’t really know what I was feeling. Also, I wasn’t even sure you were serious. Honestly, I was just confused about the whole thing, and still mad about the fight. Nothing good would’ve come from me staying and talking to you that night. I probably would’ve ended up hurting you more." All that makes a lot of sense, sure, but it doesn't change the fact that it hurt.
The look in Bucky’s face at the moment though makes you want to forgive him right this second and let this whole thing go. Pretend like the last month didn’t happen. 
So that’s what you do.
"What if…" you start, looking back and forth between his eyes and his lips "what if we forget all of this happened?"
"No." he answered so fast and firmly that it made you furrow your eyebrows in confusion and disappointment. "I don’t want to forget anything about us, doll. Good or bad, it’s all worth it, as long as it ends with you in my arms."
You're melting and can't hold yourself back, you grab his face and bring his lips down to yours.
He freezes, probably not expecting it, but when you're about to pull away, he holds your face to keep you there, deepening the kiss.
After a few moments you hear someone clear their throat and almost throw Bucky off of you, looking behind him while he turns to see who it is and you see Steve and Sam standing there, amused looks on their faces.
"We were just talking." You blurted out and Sam cracked and almost doubled over with laughter.
"Really?" Steve said while raising an eyebrow, almost exasperated and knowing damn well what you were doing.
"Sure they were, Steve, she was obviously trying to get the word out of his mouth!" Sam said to the blonde, still laughing his ass off.
"Oh, of course she was. Tell us, sweetheart, what did you find in Bucky’s mouth?" Steve was now laughing too, and you were so embarrassed you hid your face in Bucky’s chest.
He wrapped his arms around you, barely glaring at the two laughing idiots. "Ok, just get out of here, punks." Fortunately for once in their lives they decided to actually listen and left, their laughs echoing through the halls.
"You okay there, doll?" Bucky was now chuckling at your embarrassment.
You raised your head and, meeting his eyes, you said "I can’t believe Captain Dumbass is making fun of us for kissing."
He started laughing and you gladly joined him, looking forward to making up for the time you missed with him, unknowingly promising each other to never let go of the other ever again.
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