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#marvel humor
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For the next MCU movie featuring Shang-Chi, I want there to be a scene where Shang-Chi is demonstrating the power of the ten rings which starts out serious but ends with him doing the spinning marbles trick from ATLA. 
This trick, but with the rings:
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yeahlenas · 3 months ago
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black widow but it’s just chaos
(or: yelena belova being a child for 7 minutes straight)
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kram6496 · a month ago
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A Little Too Much
Yelena Belova x Reader
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You just finished installing the new locks on the cabinet. You were quite satisfied with your work. Well you would be if it weren’t for the Glock that you found hidden behind the nearby television. She’s taking it too far.
“Lena!” You call out to your bride. She walks in a second later, keeping a gentle hand on her growing belly.
“What is wrong, my love?” She bats her eyes at you like she’s done nothing wrong. You hold up the Glock.
“Why was this hidden behind the TV?” It’s a good question.
“Can’t a woman just hide her weapons wherever she sees fit?” She tries to reason.
“Lena you’ve gone too far. I want to protect our child as much as we can too. But this is just a little too much.” Lena huffs in defeat.
“I just want our child to grow up without having to constantly look over her shoulder. Is that too much to ask?” Lena explains as she slumps down to your couch in defeat.
You take a seat next to her and pull her into a hug. “Sweetheart, our baby will be safe. No one will come between our child and us. She’ll have two deadly assassins as parents.”
Lena smirks, “we are pretty cool aren’t we?” You nod and pull her into a kiss. She quickly takes control, pushing you further into the couch cushions. She pins you by the shoulders and straddles your lap. She slams her lips into yours.
This would normally be a wonderful and breathtaking moment for you but you feel the curvature of a tactical shotgun hiding just behind your couch.
You quickly pull it out of its hiding spot. You can only look at your wife, “Lena?!?”
She simply laughs and shrugs, “Old habits?”
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xialing-tenrings · a month ago
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Shang-Chi: bitches b like “im baby” but have childhood trauma and neglect like wtf do u know about being baby u were forced to grow up from an early age anyways I’m bitches
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For Marvel’s first Asian superhero movie, it’s fitting that the main villain is someone who strikes fear in most Asian people:
A disappointed Asian father with impossibly high expectations for his kids. 
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vanillaavengerlings · 20 days ago
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Natasha: So Steve, how’s your search for true love going so far?
Steve: I just haven’t met anybody who is not completely self-absorbed and impossible to have a conversation with.
Tony: If that’s a veiled criticism about me, I won’t hear it and I won’t respond to it.
Steve:
Natasha: Bozhe moi...
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latent-thoughts · 5 months ago
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So here is Loki, just casually using his magic, but I paused at this bit-
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And...
It reminded me of something else...
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Uhhh...
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I apologize unreservedly. 👀
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kram6496 · a month ago
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Three Attempts
Wanda Maximoff x Reader
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Wanda Maximoff was undeniably head over heels in love with her best friend: you. She just wasn’t sure how she was going to approach it. So she went to Natasha who gave her three different options. Wanda tried each of them. And here were each of their outcomes.
Attempt 1: Flirty
Natasha told Wanda to laugh at everything you say. Also to do so while putting a hand on your shoulder and looking you in the eye.
Wanda found you telling a story to some of the other Avengers. “So there I was surrounded by like ten goons and I said I like those odds” she immediately put a hand on your shoulder and began to laugh.
“Ohmygosh (Y/N). You’re so funny!” Everyone simply looked at her.
“Uh Wanda,” you try to explain, “I was telling them how I ended up with this arm cast.” It was only then that she realized that your entire arm was in an inflatable arm cast.
Attempt 2: Pick Up Lines
Natasha told Wanda to try pick up lines. The lines were “are you from Tennessee cause you’re the only ten I see” and “did it hurt when you fell from Heaven” Wanda couldn’t really remember them.
She found you, relaxing with a cup of tea and making one for her. “Hey Wanda, want some tea?” You ask her with a smile.
“So…” Wanda tried to remember the lines, “did it hurt when you fell from Tennessee?”
You turn to her in confusion, “What?”
“What?” Wanda immediately covers her tracks. She totally botched that one.
Attempt 3: the Hail Mary
This was the last attempt. The one that requires the most courage that anyone can muster.
She found you in the living room of the compound. You were trying to find the Dick Van Dyke show. “Hey (Y/N)” she says with as much courage as she’s got.
You turn to her with a smile, “hey Wanda. What’s up?”
She takes a deep breath before continuing, “I’m in love with you. I can only hope that maybe you feel the same way.”
You can only look at her in shock.
“I-I gave you my heart a long time ago. I just want a small place in yours. I love you. Please say something”
You respond in confusion, “I thought we were already dating.”
“Wait what?” Wanda blinks, could this be happening?
“The movie nights. The lunches at the diner. The times we make breakfast together. I thought we were dating.” You try to explain.
Wanda sinks into the couch cushions next to you. She covers her face with her hands in embarrassment. “Ohmygosh” she begins to laugh.
You take her hands and look her in the eye, “so can I take you out officially then?”
She begins to cry tears of joy. “Yes. Yes!” She tackles you to the cushions, peppering you with kisses. The two of you cuddle on that couch watching old sitcoms and laughing at your shared jokes.
Natasha walks by, wondering to herself which option ended up being the one that worked.
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