Mobius: I'm literally so mad at you right now. There's nothing you can say that'll make me forgive you.

Loki: I-

Mobius: Okay I forgive you...

Loki + Incorrect Quotes pt 2/? (x)

mobius: *holding a bottle* is this whiskey or perfume? loki: *chugs entire bottle* loki: it’s perfume.

Y/N : So do I have a girlfriend today or a boyfriend?

Loki: Since you ate my last slice of pizza…today you have an enemy…

Sylvie: Let’s play a game. 

Hunter B-15: Okay??

Sylvie: I’m calling it “Loki or Jet Ski”. I’m gonna tell you something Mobius said recently, and you have to decide if he said it to Loki, or to a jet ski.

Hunter B-15: ...okay….

Sylvie: Quote one. “I love you more than life itself.”

Hunter B-15: …shit…

Y/N: Here's a fun idea: we hang mistletoe, but instead of kissing the person we're caught underneath with, we have to FIGHT them.

Steve: No doll, we're not doing that.

Bucky, nodding: Mistlefoe.

Steve: Buck, DON'T encourage her-

Bucky: WHO ATE MY PLUMS?

Steve: Don’t look at me.

Bucky: SAM, WAS IT YOU?

Sam: *Looks at Y/N*

Y/N:

Sam: It was Y/N.

Y/N: SAM YOU PROMISED YOU WOULDN´T TELL!

Bucky: Oh, it was you, baby? Were they good? Want some more?

Sam: This motherf-

Loki: Do you have any crush Y/N?

Y/N: *blushing* Well there's this handsome sorcerer…

Loki: Strange?

Y/N: Sassy

Loki: Barton?

Y/N: Particularly clever

Loki: The angry doctor?

Y/N: Very talented for lying

Loki: Romanoff?

Y/N: With murder charges against him

Loki: Barnes?

Y/N: Talks like he's from another age

Loki: Captain almighty?

Y/N: From space…

Loki: My brother???

Y/N: Seriously! Loki! Are you kidding me?

Loki:….

Loki: nick fury?????

Y/N: *annoyedly* Oh you dumb bitch…yeah its fury…

Loki: Bu-but I thought you like me….

Y/N: I’M GONNA KILL YOU LOKI…

loki: what’s up guys, i’m back.

thor: what the- you can’t be here. you’re dead. i literally saw you die.

loki: death is a social construct.

Natasha: so what do you think?

Bucky: sorry I wasn’t listening but I strongly disagree with Sam

Steve:

Steve: he’s not even here

Sam: You ever wanna talk about your emotions, Bucky?

Bucky: No.

Zemo: I do!

Sam: We know Zemo.

Zemo: I’m sad.

Bucky and Sam: Shut the hell up Zemo.

Sam: What’s your blood type?

Bucky, bleeding out: How would I know?

Sam: How would you not?

Bucky: Who am I, Karl Landsteiner, discoverer of blood groups?

Sam: You don’t know your own blood type but you know who discovered them?!?!

Y/N: Guys!!! A snake bit Thor what do I do?!

Natasha: Elevate and apply pressure!!

Y/N: *lifts snake up into the air* APOLOGIZE OR ELSE.

Loki: *turns back into himself* Never!

Hugs

Y/N: Have you seen Loki?

Thor: No. Do you need something?

Y/N: Just a hug.

Thor: Well I can help with that.

Loki: *appearing out of literally nowhere and hugging you* Noooo.

Y/N: Christ, Loki. You scared me. Where did you even come from?

Loki: I felt a disturbance in the force. Thor was about to hug my little mortal.

Y/N: Has Peter been teaching you pop culture references again?

Loki: How was the meeting?

Y/N: I want to stab everyone.

Loki: Don't get blood on your clothes. We have dinner reservations at seven.

Y/N: I love you for enabling me.

Loki: Love you too.

Walker: Bucky isn’t answering his phone.

Sam: I’ll call.

Walker: Lemar and I have both tried six times each, what makes you thi-

Bucky, answering on the first ring: Hello?

Sam: Hey did you get their calls?

Bucky: Whose?

Sam:

Sam: You blocked Walker didn’t you?

Bucky: First thing I did when he got my number.

Mobius: I have made a useful asset to the TVA

Literally everyone else: you fucked up a perfectly good Loki is what you did. Look at it. It’s got anxiety.

Bucky: I have a bad feeling about this

Steve: what do you mean?

Bucky: don't you get that little voice in your head that tells you when something will get you in trouble?

Steve: no?

Bucky: that explains so much actually

insp

Sam: *loses Bucky*

Sam: HAS ANYONE SEEN MY COWORKER?!?!

Sam: Metal arm, grumpy face, might be bisexual like me but we haven’t had the talk.

Sharon: Uh no-

Sam, digging through a bowl of plums: BUCKY ARE YOU IN THERE?!?!