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yesyourstalker · 27 days

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Neta: mahi can I ask you a favor?

Mahi: yeah?

Neta: tomorrow before you come in to work can you walk my daughter to the train station?

Mahi: no

Neta: please

Mahi: noooo I'm sorry your daughter is mean and I have to open tomorrow I don't want to wake up even earlier than I have to. Why can't you do it?

Neta: I have to head over to the other store to check up on the baristas. I have to wake up early and I have no time to walk my daughter to school and I don't want her to walk alone because there's weirdos around here.

Mahi: can't you get Baja to do it. she likes Baja.

Neta: I thought about asking him, but no.... she'd probably convinced him to let her skip school. I can't have that

Mahi: *sigh* I'll do it for 50 bucks and 30 minutes added on to my hour lunch

Neta: fine. Just make sure she makes it safe for school, make sure she gets on the train. Don't let her skip, She will try to convince you to do it The train station is only like 45 minutes away. Here's an extra 20 bucks for the train and breakfast, buy some donuts Candi has been craving donuts for the past week.

Mahi:*sigh* if she makes fun of me once I'm leaving her

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Neta: ..*snoring*......*snoring*........

Alarm: BEEP BEEP BEEP

Neta: uhhh fuck....*sniff*.......

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Neta: hey Stefan, I'll be there by 9am

Stefan: I'll see you there

Neta: hmmm *yawn*....*huff*

Ikkan: You're up early..... It's 5:00 a.m.

Neta: yeah I have to head up to the other mall. I have to be there for barista training..... Sorry for waking you up

Ikkan: it's fine I have to leave in an hour anyway, I might study some more.

Neta: ok.....[kiss] good luck on your final exam babe I know you'll pass

Ikkan: hmm

Neta: crab cakes you up?

Cirrina: *sleeping*....hmm what? what is it?

Neta: Mahi is going to walk you to school they'll be there at 6:30 ok?

Cirrina: nooooo I can't let everyone see me with them! I can go by myself I'm not a baby anymore

Neta: Be nice. I know you're not cici but I don't feel comfortable with you walking out when it's still dark out alright. I worry.

Cirrina: fine.... If they try to talk to me I'm ditching them

Neta: Don't be difficult crab cakes. Get ready for school.

Cirrina: *humpf*

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Cici: change of plans

Maria: wht? We're not ditching?

Cici: we are I will explain it to you when we meet up. Just wear your uniform and pack your other clothes in your weapons bag.

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Mahi: *yawn*.....*huff*........ .

Baja: morning Mahi You're up early. Don't you have to go work at 7:00?

Mahi: I have to do this stupid thing for my boss. Why are you up?

Baja: I'm always up at this time. I usually just go jogging. You want to join me sometime maybe. it's good for you

Mahi:.......no......

Baja: oh.....ok.... Well if you ever up to it I'm always up at 6:00 every day except Saturday. That's my break day

Mahi: yeah yeah I get it. You live a healthier lifestyle than me. I get it bye a

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Neta: hello?

Stefan: are you here yet? I'm here. My apprentice is here. My other employee just showed up

Neta: You hired another employee?? We just needed one

Stefan: technically she is not an employee. She is my assistant but she will be supervising the shop as well

Neta: well the store is a couple ways away. It should take me around 4 hours since there's no traffic so you're just going to have to wait

Stefan: very well I suppose I can wait............*sigh*............ Toguni......

Toguni: Yes sir

Stefan: Make me a flat white please

Toguni: Yes sir with almond milk?

Stefan: Yes, of course. Take a note When you start to recognize regulars I would advise you to remember their orders. Not only does it save time, but it also builds a relationship between you and your customers.

Toguni: yes sir

Stefan: uh hmm... Pacifica

Pacifica: Yes sir?

Stefan: I want you to set a reminder for the of construction of the lounge area I'm tied between modern rustic or brutalism? What do you think?

Pacifica: I'm more of a brutalism type it person

Stefan: Toguni... What do you think?

Toguni uhhhhh..... I like the wood finish it would go well with the concrete walls and floor...... Maybe add some plants. It would be good like instead of just brutalism and they could be eco brutalism

Stefan:. ............*inhale*...............................*exhale*.............................*sip*.............*sip*........hmm

Toguni: did I-.......... Did I say something wrong?......

Stefan: It's perfect, genius, amazing. Pacifica!

Pacifica: I put it in order for wood panels and several tubs of concrete sir.

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Mahi: *sigh*........ Cirrina!! Come on! Hurry up I don't have all morning!

Cirrina: I'm right here Cod!

Mahi: ...... ....... what's that thing?

Cirrina: it's a cello I have orchestra this week

Mahi: All right, whatever let's go

Cirrina: yeah do you mind walking behind me? I don't want people to think I'm with you or anything

Mahi: nope. I'm standing right next to you like my boss wants me to do

Cirrina: *ugh* ....*huff* what ever...... Just leave when I'm at the train station

Mahi: Neta said I can't leave until I see you get on the train so.....

Cirrina: well I can just tell him that you did. You don't need to be with me!

Mahi: hmmmmmm nah I need to make sure you're safe

Cirrina: You're only doing this to annoy me

Mahi: am I? I can't tell

Cirrina: Ugggg fuck off!

Mahi: hehehehehe Cirrina! You can't go ahead of me. I have to keep my eyes on you just in case.

Cirrina:....*huff*.............hey guys

Friend 1 (Pinta) : hey Cirrina.......is that the cute Tetra you were talking about?

Cirrina: obviously not, look at them.

Mahi: .........................

Friend 2 (Nina): how come your dad isn't here. Isn't it his turn to stay at the train station hehehe

Cirrina: ew Nina, stop. He's literally old, He has some stupid word thing. he has his employee walking us today.

Friend 3 (Maria): so what's the plan we can't get on the train?

Cirrina: instead of the train station we go to the manhole. We tell them that we go to underground school and we go through the manhole and wait till they're gone.

Friend 1: That's the plan?

Friend 2: You think that's a good idea?

Cirrina: I think so

Mahi: what are you guys whispering about

Cirrina: we're talking about our bra sizes. Why are you so invested Weirdo?

Mahi: *eh*.... alright......sorry

Cirrina: alright we're at the train station. See ya

Mahi: now I just need to wait for the train

Friend 1: yeah the train is underground

Mahi: huh?

Friend 2: yeah the train is underground.... We don't go to school with a surface dwellers

Friend 3: could you imagine. *Ugh*

Cirrina: You're doing too much Maria ........yep! So you can go now. Bye. We're heading out to school

Mahi: alright, Open the hatch.

Cirrina: what?

Mahi: Open the hatch so I can climb down with you guys and make sure you get on the train?

Cirrina:(glaring)........................................................ fine

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Stefan: what would you do if I give you a work uniform

Toguni: uhhhh Wear it.......

Stefan: what would you wear?

Toguni: ...................... What you give me?

Stefan: ..... What do you wear on a regular basis?

Toguni: black shirt, a jacket........some jeans and...... shoes

Stefan: would you be able to pull off corset?

Toguni:uhhhhh

Stefan: Pacifica put in an order for a male corset what is your size?

Toguni: I usually wear a medium for space but I can fit in a small......

Stefan: what is your shoe size?

Toguni: 7.......

Stefan:.............. Take off your jacket............. Okay turn around do a spin full 180........ok.......ok..... I can work with this. Pacifica put it in order for 3 blazers, 3 vests, 4 blouses and 2 pairs of slacks and 4 pairs of dress shoes all in the color scheme we addressed earlier.

Pacifica: right away sir they will be arriving in an hour. Do you still want me to order the corset

Stefan: order 5

Toguni:.hmmmmm

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Friend 1: Cirrina

Cirrina: we'll hang around in octavo valley for a while. Their turf maps open around 8:00 so we can stay there and then head up after

Friend 2: *ugh* we can't go around octavo valley

Cirrina: what's wrong with octavo valley?

Friend 2: oh my god don't be like that.....you know exactly what I meant. We had plans and everything we were going to wahoo world first

Friend 3: we also wanted to go to mahi-mahi we bought our bathing suits and everything

Cirrina: All right! Okay, let's just get on the train and we'll figure it out! I know my way around this place. You guys are being such surface dwellers

Mahi: so when's the train showing up?

Cirrina: it shows up when it shows up *pff*

Mahi: ok..... It's weird because the only school in this area down here is a cuddleton high. Last time I checked you girls aren't in high school

Friend 1: why are you so invested in what school we go to? Are you going to follow us or something? Don't you have like a job or a life?

Mahi: listen I'm just doing what my boss tells me . I'm not trying to get fired because I lost his daughter all right.

Cirrina: You don't give a shit. You're just doing this to be an assho-.........…hi daddy!

Neta: hi crab cakes! I'm just calling in. Did you make it on the train safely?

Carrie: yeah I'm on the train right now heading to school and everything. How are you? Are you at the mall yet?

Neta: yeah I made it here quicker than I thought. Have fun at school okay? Please don't get into another fight

Cirrina: I won't.

Neta: alright sweet heart.

Cirrina: ok love you bye daddy!!

Neta: bye. I love you too carb cakes

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Neta: alright... she's safe........so........... Why am I here?

Stefan: well first I need a consultation about the lounge area

Neta: well uhhhhh I was planning on just making it look like the bottom floor you know just.... With couches and chairs and tables and stuff.

Stefan: what do you think of an eco brutalist design?

Neta: oh........uhhhh I mean the lounge is a loft area. It's not a separate room entirely..... so it still kind of has to flow with the original design of the store but.................uh..........

Stefan:..........................................

Neta: ................... do you have any reference photos of what you have in mind?

Stefan: certainly of course. Pacifica!

Pacifica: here you go

Neta: thank you.... Pacifica..........ehhhhhh oh...um ............. Make the wood a bit darker and the concrete black........ with.....warmer lighting. The pictures you're showing me look pretty.............. Sterile.. .

Stefan: hmmm............ I guess you're right........ Pacifica.

Pacifica: editing the order now sir

Neta: is this why you called me here? I thought I was going to train Toguni. Also, I hired an interior designer. Aren't they supposed to be here too?

Stefan: I got rid of them. I told him they're only allowed to work downstairs. They're not working up here.....*heh*.... No.......This is my vision!...........This is my space!!

Neta: I understand that, but you know it doesn't hurt for them to help

Stefan: no!

Neta: ok.

Stefan:............. Thank You for your understanding..............*sigh*........... Anyway.............. I'm so sorry. Do you want coffee? So rude of me to not ask you that. Hahah

Neta: No, I'm fine I-

Stefan: Toguni make me a vanilla macchiato! Sugar free!

Toguni: Yes sir!

Neta: ok.........I guess I'll have one cup coffee

Stefan: yeah about that....... We need to go over the menu. I would love if you sampled some of our pics

Neta: just give me one second... I need to make a call

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Cirrina: welp We already missed the train to school anyway so you can go now bye ......

Mahi: I could go but I could also call your dad and tell him the truth........... Looks like I don't have to call him. He's calling me

Cirrina: shit

Mahi: hey Neta

Neta: hey Mahi Cirrina's on the train right?

Mahi: uh... what?..... I'm sorry shitty signal. I can't hear you..... You're breaking up! Sorry......................so..... How much are you going to pay me for not snitching?

Cirrina: .... I'm not paying you anything!!

Mahi: All right, I guess I'll just call your dad back and I'll let him know that you and your little friends never got on the train and you're planning on ditching school so........

Cirrina: Cod fine. ................I only have 15 bucks

Mahi: 15?.........hmmmm..... I don't know.... Doesn't seem like a lot

Cirrina: 20... That's all I'm willing to give

Mahi: ... ..............nah ... Taking money from 15-year-old girl doesn't seem right.....

Cirrina: then what the fuck do you want-

Mahi: hold up..... Hello

Neta: can you hear me now?

Mahi: yeah, I can hear you

Neta: You walked her the train station?

Mahi: yep, they're on the train and they're at school. I'm heading off to work right now

Neta: All right good. Thanks for doing this for me Mahi glad I can trust you with this

Mahi: all right......... I decided not to snitch so I guess you owe me now.

Cirrina: what do you want?

Mahi: The tidal wave music festival is coming up in the summer. I need two all access passes for 1 day......... You think you can convince your dad to give you two of them for free? I know I can get them with a big discount and everything but you know it's still expensive and I have bills to pay....

Cirrina:............... fine.... I can see what I can do........

Mahi: alright.... I guess we have a deal

Cirrina: All right, how about this? I can give you two access pass for 2 days and you walk us to the train stop every Friday for a months so we can ditch school.

Mahi: ..........alright fine.

Cirrina: Good.

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Stefan: okay, so this is our mint mocha iced cappuccino. Really taking that flavor of mint. I feel like this is going to be a great seller during the summer. Ironic because this was our holiday blend.

Neta: ok.....sip.... it's good it tastes like mint

Stefan: Great! Now I want you to sample caramel latte and salted caramel latte. This menu is going to be all specialty drinks some come from my holiday menus and the others were limited time releases. Caramel latte is the standard, but the salted caramel was only served during the fall via 2017.

Toguni: here you go sir.............. I'm so sorry

Neta: It's fine. It's not your fault.............sip...........sip......... Yeah..... I like both of them. They're very good. Very caramel flavor. Yep

Stefan: All right. Perfect Pacifica

Pacifica: adding that to the menu sir

Neta: I'm heading to the bathroom

Stefan: This is your 3rd trip! we haven't tried the apple crisp macchiato that was a on our fall collection for 2019 that was a big hit.

Neta: You've already given me 20 cups of coffee and several varieties of creamer that is the equivalent to 5 jugs of water and 4 laxatives for me. Let me go Okay Let me go to the bathroom Cod damn Feels like I'm being tortured

Stefan: very well I guess we have to wait another 15 minutes...... I don't understand what his problem is. We've been drinking the same amount of coffee and we're perfectly fine. Right Toguni?

Tonugi: uh huh We really are sir......(Discreetly pouring two cups of coffee down the sink)

Stefan: some people just don't appreciate this art form. .......hmmm ..... Pacifica remind me to order a commission with that one artist who painted a mural for my house. Toguni would you be able to stand still for a portrait?

Toguni: uhhhhh I-I don't know

Neta:.ok I'm all better for now why don't we take a break from coffee sampling Toguni Do you know how to use the register?

Toguni: yes sir.

Neta: All right did you watch all the videos about sanitation?

Toguni: yes

Neta:safety?

Toguni: yes

Neta: and your benefits?

Toguni: Yes sir I did

Neta: all right You don't need to call me sir by the way just call me neta (clap) I think I think we're done for the day. I'm going home This has been *burp* excuse me An experience I gonna go to the bathroom

Stefan: Wait, I need your opinion about uniform

Neta: just give him everything and he can pick and choose what he wants to wear that day Oh my COD can I go now I feel like I'm going to be sick Again

Stefan: fine. What do you think?

Toguni: I think that would be fun to do. Different look every day...... free clothes is a perk too

Stefan:..... Great! At least someone is being optimistic thank you Toguni.

Toguni: is he going to be okay?

Stefan: he's just being dramatic

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Mahi: Good morning!

Candi: You're an hour late what were you doing that was so important!! It's literally a Friday!!! This is our busiest day! What kind of manager is fucking late while everyone else is here on time?!?!

Mahi: hi Candi... You want a donut? I got one with the dried shrimp on it just for you.

Candi:...................................... thank you *eating*

Mahi: You're welcome! Here I got you one too Vinny hope you like strawberry

Vinny: I do actually. thanks

Mahi: All right, let's start the day

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Mahi: Im planning to go to the tidal wave music festival you want in?

Umishi: I don't have the money for that :(

Mahi: it's fine I can get you in. I'm blackmailing a 15-year-old

Umishi: I have several questions

Mahi: too bad

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Ikkan: hey I passed my exam I'm going to be graduating next month. My parents and Noji are going to be staying over at my place You need to help me set up the guest bedroom.

Neta: That's great honey, I'm so happy for you [kisskisskisskisskisskisskisskisskisskiss]

Ikkan: hehehehehe ok...ok....I also bought you ginger soda and Pepto pill like you asked you okay?

Neta: yeah..... just.... Just a little stomach ache is all come here sit with me on the couch for a while Maybe celebrate later with some takeout

Ikkan: Neta you're shaking. Are you okay what's your glucose level?

Neta: 60 I checked I'm great fine I'm amazing I feel fantastic. I just had really really strong coffee and several cups a lot of cups of coffee I only had one panic attack and I only threw up twice so I'm fine I'm fine I'm good i'm amazing

Cirrina: Hi Dad, I'm back from school. My friends are here, put some pants on.

Neta: i never took them off

Friend 2: hiiiiii Mr V.

Cirrina: Nina I swear to Cod

Ikkan: hey cici

Cirrina: hi ikkan

Ikkan: wait Cirrina why are you wearing your swim top? Where's your uniform?

Cirrina:..................... Well.....

Friend 1: we finished our rehearsal early so mr. Luminelli let us leave early. I got our mom to pick us up and take us to mahi-mahi

Neta: oh that's nice of Mr. Luminelli Tell your mom I said thank you

Cirrina: alright.......... I just came here to get an extra set of clothes I'm staying over at pintas for a slumber party

Neta: okay sweetheart. Have fun.

Cirrina: bye love you

Neta:bye sweetie they definitely skip school

Ikkan: You're going to ground her?

Neta: no let her have her fun I've skipped school before and I turned out fine

Ikkan: your heartbeat hasn't slowed down for the past 15 minutes......*sigh*..... Let's just have a quick visit to emergency

Neta: noooo I'm fine I'm just anxious. It's just anxious and I'm fine. I just had a little too much to drink

Ikkan: It's just a quick visit just to make sure you're actually okay

Neta:................

Ikkan: we can get takeout after

Neta:.................ok....... Can I have the bathroom first?

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Mahi is also blackmailing @fish-at-fish-fish-resort

Toguni was found in a box by @conkreetmonkey

Umishi is still concerned about the concerning text @catastropic

#neta overdose on caffeine and was given activated charcoal at the hospital #This is not their first time in the emergency hospital obviously #Serena's friends her named Nina pinta and Maria #Nina is an inkling #pinta is a piranha #and Maria is ribbon eel #Toguni is like the son Stefan never had #he has one son but he's 4 and he can't drink coffee yet and it's really hurting their bond as father and son #Pacifica is an Angel fish #Mahi doesn't like Cirrina but they've seen weirdos out at that time of day too so they wanted to be safe #graduation yay ikkan is out of college is going to be a teacher yay #maybe road trip ep during the summer idk #Stefan is trying to dress Toguni lik a romantic goth victorian some one help him #this is the 3rd time neta went to the emergency room all of them were work related too

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devilbrakers · 1 year

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OC DUALITY

was tagged by @morvaris to take this uquiz for my ocs >:) thank you nico this was super fun!!

tagging: @numbaoneflaya @time-is-a-lake @aartyom @nuclearstorms @girlbosselrond @druidgroves @malefiicarum @swordcoasts @aldcaldos @sufferthorn @steelport @calenhads @lavinet and anyone else who’d like to join in !!

you and the hat man

oh boy you're fighting demons aren't you? it's like you're in a constant staring competition with something that's always in the peripheral. what the fuck. (at least, that's how people who don't know you would react). at this point you've probably gotten pretty familiar with the hat man. he's a reliable kind of guy. keeps to himself, sure, but you can trust him to be there. maybe a haunting isn't too bad if it's never left your side. you can only imagine what it will be like when he's not there any more.

god-hungry scientist and their abominable child

you stitched something together inside of yourself and gave it life with light from the sky and now it won't die and you can't kill it because part of you loves it and you're not quite right in the head or the person you used to be but at the end of the day it's simply a beast of sadness. you crave the mercy you didn't get from your creators and so i'm telling you please forgive yourself. please hold the monster by the hand.

moon curse of the werewolf

you have found yourself hungered or sickened or ambitious to the point of emotional carnage. you are fine, until you're not, and then you could rip someone in your way apart with your bared teeth by complete accident, and later claw at yourself in fits of pain trying to apologize. do you look at the moon that blessed you in her name, at her marred beauty and baneful eyes, and wish she could just crush that loving-hateful heart of yours before it crushes itself? every bite you take out of flesh is a response to the threads of silver bullets in you that haven't healed. the duality is that the human inside is howling too, gnashing, and without the wolf pelt, everyone can ignore it and turn away. at some point, you got tired of the moon being your only witness. now the wolf is there to make sure others know that you are hurt, and deserving of humanity, of attention to wounds. because that wolf loves you; all of you; and knows when you are hurt better than yourself.

#feel free to ignore this if you want !! idk how many people have already been tagged fjsdkl #anyway. going to be annoying abt this in the tags now <3 #the main thing that gets me abt gray's is the 'maybe a haunting isn't too bad if it's never left your side'#like????? ik the hat man thing is probs supposed to be funny and it kinda is but it fits them so well #almost everyone close to them has died or left them atp but maybe it isn't so bad. just to have one constant #dmitri :| yeah. yeah #everything he felt he had to become to save his sister who was dead the whole time anyway but ended up being a better survival tactic anyway #so he just stuck with it until he died but then he comes back as a demon and now he has to live with what he did forever #i don't think he really could ever forgive himself. mainly for failing nina but it's started to eat him alive less and less over the years #mainly bc he does everything he can not to think about it too much but he also doesn't really want to totally get rid of that part of #himself. the part that was capable of torturing and killing all those people bc it really was powered by love and desperation to some extent #and that proves that maybe he has some shred of humanity left even if she's been gone for decades now #not that he does shit like that anymore. but he's capable and willing to for those he loves even if they'd probably hate him for it #and miko's :(#yeah #lashing out at people when it gets to be too much which is often given the life that she lives and then beating herself up for it nonstop #but it's also a way to protect herself and even tho she died young it got her pretty far #and it helped her protect other people (mainly gray and blake) when it came down to it because she couldn't stand seeing them hurt either #idk if i articulated myself v well but yeah jfdsklfdjs my dmc gang are all my blorbos #my ocs #tag #gray #dmitri #miko

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saintlesbian · 1 year

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not me praying on the downfall of the bensons rn!!! of all the people for Nina to tell, I didn’t think she’d bring Martin into it????

#general hospital #pentababbles #sorry to be anti benson again and so blatantly pro nina like.#I’m glad the SEC consequences are coming back. I’m glad that Carly might actually face some kind of consequence #bc seeing her getting so chummy with Ninas daughter when she orchestrated events in such a way to keep nina from knowing the truth angers me #downside tho. nina is immediately going to regret it and the consequences are going to splash back on her HARD sorry.#Drew’s busy with the whole rescue mission rn so it’ll be awkward when he comes home and faces insider trading charges #Carly could very well karma Houdini her way out of this so that might leave the bag on just drew. if anyone at all #but also. the thought of Carly getting arrested mid wedding in front of her family well. that’s embarrassing 😅#like i don’t like Carly and I do want her to face some consequences but. a little worried how the kids r gonna react to her goin to jail #and like. nina you can kinda tell is regretting this decision bc she is gonna get in sooo much trouble with Sonny #I don’t want that to fuck with their relationship but. nina just can’t help herself in these situations #wish it could’ve been just another step removed from Nina tbh.#Tracy’s hatred of ELQ could come in handy maybe? or at least create some interesting family infighting #either way. nina number one babygirl 2023 rotating her in my mind rn #Carly good fuckin luck I guess. lol. lmao

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omarfor-orchestra · 1 year

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Ok però dopo aver passato tutti gli stages of grief ed averne creato un altro chiamato "sarcasmo" sono all'accettazione. They would make a good couple.

Spoilers in the tags

#think about it for a minute #forget about the actors who are basically brothers and have an age gap of 6 years #think about mimmo coming out of that (DAMNED) ipm with no family no money NOTHING #think about him confused by this life the other kids are living #think about him watching simone finally free to be himself and think about him giving himself permission to ask himself some questions #and then he finds out this boy here has suffered a lot just like him and the man he considers a father was not that good of a dad after all #he would be painfully protective. think about it #that's all we can do btw /think about it/ bc they won't let him have his redeption lmao #OK BUT THEN!!!!!!#think about Simone helping him with his 'stuff' and kind of falling in love with him a little and maybe they manage to be together #for a while #and as soon as mimmo realizes he's endangering him he leaves #simone would be devastated but you know who would be there for him? who was trying to tell him to leave him #because he knows the guys like him! he was one! he knows he just wants to use him for his own convenience!#exactly. manuel.#the potential is great you all #they still need to grow a little #(Manuel realizes he doesn't love Nina and can't love her child either)#the only spoiler is the nina one. i mean everyone knows about mimmo at this point right? 💀#un professtag

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heelanat · 10 months

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me reading the words "using both hands so he bites on the hair tie": why would u say something so controversial yet so brave

this is kind of an embarrassing confession but this thought was inspired by that one todoroki fanart ive seen years ago during my mha phase

it was him shirtless 🤢 with long-er... hair and he was, you guessed it, tying his hair with a hair tie in between his teeth. and let me tell you my search history is DISGUSTING rn as i continue to search for it or at least a similar pose but alas ive been unsuccessful... time to go delete the history-🏃‍♀️

here's liddol hwan❤️ to give you an idea of what im visualizing for matt if w1 does wanna torture us hehehehehehewh-

#nina <3 #idk i cant find any videos for some damn reason #maybe he didnt tie it himself #ikon #ikon jay #jinhwan #maybe some ikonics can help me idk

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zaritarazi · 1 year

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listen sometimes i watch skyrim lore videos because i find epicnate315′s voice and enthusiasm soothing and today in one of his older videos he mentioned something i had completely forgotten about in-game which is the group of bandits that specifically run a wolf-fighting ring and not to bring back this helnik au written for helnik week 2021 that takes place in the elder scrolls universe (skyrim specifically) but i just need to highlight a few things:

1. this au is actually delicious i might go back to it i love the idea of nina and matthias having to fight all those draugr in sarthaal especially since in tes canon most regular people have no idea that the dead very much do reanimate and try to kill you like, constantly. the idea of nina leading matthias into this at the very least to scare him and then they both get way in over their heads and have to claw their way out.... it pleases me

1.5. actually nina watching matthias use a word wall and having that same rush of jealousy but also kind of being a little awed by it and them having a Moment... also very good

2. trying to figure out how to fit the rest of the crows & grishaverse into tes lore is a fun thing bc i’ve decided only matthias is from skyrim and everyone else has ended up (mostly in riften) out of bad luck- i like the idea of them mostly on matthias’ home turf, bc that’s kind of what they had to do with the ice court but this is on a much bigger and weirder scale

3. just thought of this the crows having to explore dwarven ruins together is thrilling to me

4. the crux of this universe is, of course, that matthias is the dovahkin and how that’s making him reevaluate war and the cost of it and the ideals of “skyrim for the nords” and all of that, but also i do so so very much love the idea of matthias like “uh dragons can wait we gotta go free the wolves” bc wolves don’t actually hold a ton of special significance in skyrim he’s literally just a Wolf Guy and making it everyone’s problem

5. okay also just thought of this but the fact that at some point each crow will end up with a daedric artifact and sort of lowkey have that dremora as a patron now and NONE of them are happy about it.... love that for them

#soc au #helnik #helnik au #okay first impressions #inej obviously gets mehrunes' razor especially bc he also represents change and revolution #kaz gets the skeleton key #nina gets the black star #matthias gets the dawnbreaker or the ring of hircine. maybe both bc he's my special boy #jesper gets the wabbajack bc he loves random chance and also shegorath is in love with him. we're working on it. please send help #wylan gets the mask of clavicus vile bc i think clavicus would LOVE him as a follower #and now i've gone too far #anyway if you're not a shill for todd like me and you love yourself congratulations on not understanding this #for the rest of you....

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silverislander · 8 months

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i don't know what to be for halloweeeeeeeen im having a crisis of identity. drapes myself over the sofa dramatically

#like im SUPER excited but i have too many ideas and i like them all #either i could go as some sort of king/prince (recently bought a very cool crown but am not attached to the idea otherwise)#be a demon/tiefling (super fun idea but 1. i dont like how vague it is 2. i would have to buy almost all of it. horns tail etc)#i could maybe combine 1 and 2. demon prince. but i dont love that either! its vague i like specificity #or a creepypasta character maybe (would fulfill a childhood dream but i cant even pick which one id want to do most!)#i think what i need to do is go to spirit halloween and the thrift stores and just fuckin raid em and see what comes to me #bc i want to get started early!! also bc it would be fun #levi.txt #i also know my friends want to do a weekend bash like we did last year so i would have an excuse to do multiple costumes #but we usually do THEMES so ill have to fit the theme #rn i think im leaning towards doing smth creepypasta if only bc 1. its cheaper 2. i could probably reuse whatever clothes i get for it?#and ofc bc i have wanted to do a creepypasta costume since i was 12 years old and somehow never have #lj is out hes too much work. ej is too easy although hed be fun. somehow jeff is both bc its so damn hard to get a white hoodie #not jane/sally/nina for obvious reasons (do not put me in a dress so help me god) and im not too attached to ben #i dont think im good enough at sfx to go as clockwork which does make me a little sad. i loved her growing up it would be so fun #maybe i have to go as toby. thatd be rad i could do a reallly good job of that and i did love him too #yall i mightve solved it. post cancelled hbfsjhjsk

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ineffableaddiction · 1 month

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I interpret the coffee shop scene in S2 Ep 1 a bit differently than what I’ve read.

I don’t see jealousy at all.

This seems like a surprised reaction from Crowley. (Astonishment maybe?) Aziraphale got called out by Nina, and is clearly uncomfortable. Crowley could tell.

So later in their conversation, he teases Aziraphale, questioning why they aren’t in the bookshop.

But Crowley only wants to help Aziraphale. He knows the “something’s wrong” voice, is concerned and wants to find out what has upset Aziraphale.

When they go back to the bookshop, they’re in “us” mode, and Crowley casually holds the plate of eccles cakes while Aziraphale unlocks the shop. No signs of jealousy.

Once they enter the shop, Crowley tells Aziraphale that something a bit weird is going on with his old lot. No mention of a naked man. Our favorite demon is confused when Aziraphale says he might have an idea of what’s going in and calls for Jim.

Side note: How adorable is this? ❤️

I don’t think jealousy is even on the agenda. Aziraphale and Crowley know each other. They trust each other. It doesn’t even seem like it would cross either of their minds that anyone could interfere with the bond they have. Everyone else is in the periphery. It’s always just them. The group of the two of them.

#good omens #crowley #aziraphale #ineffable husbands #aziracrow #there is no jealousy #good omens meta

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forourtimetoo · 10 months

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My friend talking about how hot they find their new man

Me: “ok that’s cool but does he stop to flip over stranded beetles on the sidewalk because that’s my new metric actually”

#help I like this guy #like he’s also objectively hot but that’s not the point #the point is that he saved the stranded beetle #like I’m the kind of person who saves earthworms with a twig because I don’t like touching them but I want them to live #and he saved the beetle #ugh #I am LEAVING #but I am coming back???#so???#maybe???#nina stories #personal

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amu-says-hav-says · 9 months

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I can’t believe I went through all of Season 2 assuming Nina was the stand-in for Crowley when you actually pay attention it’s so CLEAR that she’s Aziraphale. I was tricked by her spiky, sarcastic, cynical outer shell and lulled into a false sense of security by Maggie’s bubbly optimism and wholesome goodness, because on the surface they reflect the ineffable husbands perfectly, in their personalities, their aesthetics, even many of their actions and morals. but not, and this is the real key, when it comes to their “relationship”. but those first impressions really had me damn fooled.

I missed the blatantness of Nina’s “we’re just friends. actually we’re not friends. we barely know each other.” the same thing Aziraphale said in season 1. the way he still struggles to quantify their friendship when Nina asks. Nina’s sarcasm when Crowley asks about rain and awnings because it worked for him (we all know it LMAO). hell, that whole convo the girls have in the rain is so AziraCrow (“I know. I’m not your type” “...You have no idea” hits so much harder the second time, help meeeee.) “Lindsay” maybe being symbolic of Heaven and Aziraphale’s toxic relationship with them and their abuse? (the handwritten text messages in red pen make me think of angry notes on paperwork, anyone else?) because Crowley has never actually cared about what Hell thinks of him, just not getting into trouble (or him or Aziraphale getting hurt). Maggie is always chasing Nina. NINA NEVER GOES IN THE RECORD STORE. Just like Crowley always goes to the bookstore, to Aziraphale, Zira NEVER WENT TO THE FLAT (apart from The Swap but that doesn’t count imo). Crowley has always chased Zira, not the other way around. Always there to rescue him, always going to him for company, always relying on their shared connection, always US. OUR SIDE. All through season one, he comes to Zira every time to work together, never trying to work alongside Hell in any way that isn’t to save their skins or Earth, while Zira hides things from Crowley because he STILL thinks Heaven is ultimately good and will do the right thing if he can just show them. fix it from the inside.

Maggie working up the courage to finally say something, to put herself out there, while Nina is utterly oblivious and then when she does realise Maggie has feelings, becoming standoffish, putting up that barrier, fighting it, denying it, ITS SO CROWLEY AND AZIRAPHALE IN THAT ORDER. the way I was fooled into thinking Nina’s trust issues are Crowley because he does have trust issues ofc he does BUT Crowley has ALWAYS TRUSTED AZIRAPHALE. has always relied on him. has always been hurt when Aziraphale doesn’t immediately reciprocate the way he expects (the holy water request, the bandstand, the “off in the stars” etc). he’s always the one putting himself forward. Aziraphale has always been the one to second guess everything, to fight their connection, their similarities, their friendship. the girls really made me think it was going to be okay when they sat Crowley down, even as my inner sirens were going haywire about Metatron interfering, they were telling Crowley he just needs to open up and it’ll all work out BUT HE’S ALREADY AT THAT POINT. he may not say it, and by gosh is that part of their damn problem, but he’s always SHOWN IT. he’s not Nina who needs time to heal and recover from her broken trust, he’s always been Maggie believing it doesn’t matter, they’ll end up together in the end anyway AND I WALKED RIGHT INTO THE TRAP THAT THIS MEANT THEY WERE GOING TO BE OKAYYYYYYYYYYY

#good omens #good omens spoilers #good omens season 2 #good omens 2 #GO2 #GO2 spoilers #ineffable husbands #not me going to my basically unused sideblog that isn't GO related because I NEED TO YELL THIS SOMEWHERE #I mean outside of the relationship thing there are so many ways #that Nina and Crowley line up and Zira and Maggie #but the girls story isn't about them as people #it's about this relationship the boys are tryna push on them and what that relationship reflects about the boys #anyway I'm on my first rewatch for all the clue I missed #so I imagine I'll only spot more clues to berate myself about as I go #HOW DID I FALL FOR ITTTTTT #I can't believe I was so blind #OFC the Disaster Puppy Lesbian was Crowley #and OFC the Emotionally Abused Tortoise was Aziraphale

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halemerry · 8 months

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So there’s understandably a lot out there examining the painful/emotional parts of this season, but I just wanted to take a second to acknowledge something really important that is a bit... maybe not lighter in tone but something worth celebrating.

Because like, even if he seems a bit directionless and frustrated, Crowley actually is pretty happy this season?

He’s making progress. He’s letting himself have things he wouldn’t have ever before - even if it's not exactly the thing he wants the most. He's letting himself be himself. He's not censoring instincts and impulses to nearly the same degree and it's actually pretty remarkable.

Like, okay, yes, Crowley is pretty lost now that he exists outside the toxic structure he has been operating under for millenia. And, yes his safety net with Aziraphale and the structure they operate in has also crumbled a bit because so much of that structure was built around what they were and weren’t allowed to safely do within the toxic structure. But, I actually do think this season does a lot to show that even if this struggle is very real and has consequences that aren’t all objectively good, freeing himself from that structure is a net good.

He smiles more. He laughs more. He sprawls more. He seems generally more physically relaxed and comfortable trusting his instincts without having to check everything he’s doing or saying against Hell. And this state of existence isn’t dependent on Aziraphale being present either. It’s just him being him and becoming comfortable with what that means.

And it wasn't a snap your fingers bam you're better situation either. It takes work and time to break old instincts. I mean, years have passed and we’re still struggling to let anyone say that we are nice. But significantly his instinct isn’t to snarl or physically lash out. It’s to roll his eyes or half heartedly object or maybe throw in a light growl for old times sake. And, sometimes, the instinct is to grin like a self satisfied loon as you contradict the nice human who implied you were nice.

Crowley is now in a place where his impulses to be kind are things he’s allowed to give into now and, even if he’s doing so under a veneer of snark and sneer, he is letting himself do that. He’s making sure the people around him are caring for ducks properly. He’s admitting he was worried about Aziraphale and cooing at his own car. He’s apologizing for accidentally locking people into coffee shops and openly helping them get out without even stopping to think about how maybe doing so might clue them in that he’s not quite what he seems. He's helping Shax learn her way around earth, even when she’s actively working against him and Aziraphale.

Even when interacting with Jim, who brings out the most of Crowley’s negative reactions and masks, his instincts are just as often to be gentle as they are to be angry. So long as Jim isn’t actively setting off alarm bells in Crowley’s head Crowley is so patient with him. He explains gravity unprompted and proceeds to include Jim in on his planning to get Nina and Maggie together. After his initial explosion at Jim’s presence the next two are immediately followed up by him getting upset and then backing off of Jim. He starts to threaten Jim when he’s reminded Aziraphale is in danger and then nearly immediately backs off of that, acknowledging there’s no point in it. And then, of course, after he nearly talks Jim into jumping out a window and pressures him into extracting more information from his brain he feels guilty enough to then offer Jim an act of care and service. It's such a stark difference from the guy we see even this season needing to put a layer between himself and anything good he does by either denying thanks outright or putting the blame on being under some influence.

And it’s startling how much we see him smile this season and how many different versions of that we get. From the genuine delight on his face when he thinks Operation Lovebird is working to the pleased little smirk he gives Aziraphale through the window when he watches him bring order to the arguing angels and demons in his shop, to the little smile of familiarity when he wonders what happened to Mr Dalrymple - Crowley smiles a lot compared to the first season. And it doesn't matter where he is either. He has a delightful time in Heaven, snickering and grinning to himself nearly the entire time he's prancing around there. And that’s not even getting into his dorky little snort laugh that pops up a few times throughout the season.

And I just. It’s so nice that this show doesn’t want to deny that what Aziraphale and Crowley are doing is hard but also that it doesn’t want to wallow in that struggle either. It never wants to frame that what they earned at the end of season 1 has doomed them but it isn't afraid to show the speed bumps that the system they were in is causing them on their way to happily ever after. They’re allowed to be happy. They're allowed to struggle with getting there. This is allowed to be a good thing for them, even if it sometimes takes work.

#good omens #good omens meta #crowley #good omens spoilers #gos2 spoilers #good omens season 2 #this ones actually really important to me

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amsgrey · 1 year

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take it slow

Kaz Brekker x Fem! reader

request:

hi love!! could you please do a Kaz Brekker x reader where the reader helps Kaz cut his hair?? maybe it’s super hard for Kaz to do it himself for some reason and he finally lets reader help. they take it really slow tho so kaz is comfortable. thanks 🥰🥰

warnings: not proof-read, canon typical violence, talking of gambling, a whole lot of angsty fluff, Kaz working through his skin aversion/phobia, switches a lot between the reader's pov and Kaz's, I tried to be fancy with the wiring but its meh, mid ending

You sighed, looking out over the bustling tables and colourful clothes that made up the Crow Club. Pigeons and regulars crowd the tables to avoid the pouring rain beyond the doors. Nights like this were freezing, the Ketterdam cold had a way of finding the cracks in buildings. Seeping into homes and putting out fires. Whenever it would get too bad, the Crow Club would get busier. Kaz carefully built the club to be enticing, it was hard to leave the comfort of warmth with weather like tonight.

You were in charge tonight, a steep task seeming the steady stream of people entering the club. Kaz had locked himself in his room at the slat, the last job the crows had gone on went south. Kaz took a bullet to the arm, effectively losing his strength for the foreseeable future. It had made him sourer than usual, he had chewed Jesper out for being careless and letting the job go south.

You looked over at the gunslinger now, sitting at a table with Wylan, the latter trying to stop too much money from being squandered. You had promised to stake him for the night, to make up for the way Kaz had treated him, it was the least you could do. Even so, you still felt the gnaw of guilt watching him at the table. You weren't a fan of gambling, at least not the kind Jesper was. He liked the thrill of the unknown, but he never knew when to stop. At least Wylan was with him now, supervising to be sure Jesper had a good time but not so much that he would regret it.

Nina and Matthias were here tonight as well, they hardly ever stayed around the club, but tonight Nina had convinced Matthias to have a drink and enjoy the night. Inej had been with them at the start of the night but had since slunk off to do what she did best. You hoped Kaz hadn't sent her on any errands tonight, you worried the spider might just get washed off her perch if she was. The steep gables of Ketterdam were treacherous on a clear day, they would be lethal tonight.

You were startled when a shout echoed around the room, the man it came from was clearly unhappy with his hand. He stood from his seat and grabbed the dealer by his collar, shaking and shouting in his face. You rolled your eyes, men who lost at the tables often blamed the dealers for their misfortune. The man yelling had silenced the club, everyone watching as Keeg pushed his way over to the man. Fighting and violence were not allowed in the Crow Club, if you had an issue you took it outside. You watched from the stairs as Keeg seized the man and hauled him away from the tables, tossing him outside into the rain with a terse warning not to stick around. The room was bustling again before the doors even closed.

You climbed down the stairs and headed to where Matthias and Nina were sitting, comfortably tucked into one of the quieter corners of the club. Nina lit up when she saw you, as she always did.

'Are you here to join us?" She asked, gesturing to the empty seat beside her.

You shook your head, "Have you seen Kaz tonight?"

Nina rolled her eyes, "I offered to help him with his arm but he refused." She crossed her arms, "Quite rudely, actually."

You offered her a small smile that felt fake, "Sounds like Kaz."

Nina waved her hand dismissively, taking a sip of her drink.

You turned to look back over the club, knowing you should be focused on the events that transpired here, but being unable to stop your mind wander back to the attic of the slat.

Kaz was not the easiest person to love but you did so anyway. Last night you had tried to offer him comfort, but he had lashed out and left you feeling stupid. You knew he had regretted his words, the moment he said them his eyes gave away his shock. Kaz was all sharp lines and harshness, he had boarded his heart up with cruel words and violent ways. You knew that he would not change at the drop of a hat, but you saw the good in him. The good he spent years burying so deep he couldn't find it himself. So you stayed patient, you gave him space when he needed it. Cautious not to smother him or hasten him when he was not ready. He would let you in, piece by piece until all his walls were gone, and he felt safe with you.

In the last few months since getting closer, Kaz had let you past his defences. He quietly told you small details about himself. How he had grown up outside of Lij, on a farm he had left behind after his father's death. How he was always fascinated with sleight of hand - magic - even as he outgrew childhood. He had even slowly told you about his brother. Only small things, like how he had been 5 years older and had died not long after they came to Ketterdam. You could see how hard it was for him to share those small things, watch him fight with himself about if he should tell you. So in turn, you told him about your own quietly kept secrets. It was a strange transaction, but you could feel the bond between you both strengthening the more you shared in the quiet of Kaz's room.

Nina pulled you from your trance with a hand on your arm, she drew your attention back to the present. You turned to look at her, knowing already she could feel how your heart was racing with worry.

"You should go try again," She said, squeezing your hand.

"I'm meant to be closing."

"We can do it," Matthias replied, "Jesper and Wylan will help."

You looked over to where Wylan and Jesper were, they seemed to feel your eyes on them and they turned and offered smiles.

"Go," Nina urged again, "Before I change my mind and cozy up in bed."

You hugged your friend tight, thanking her and asking her to pass on thanks to Wylan and Jesper.

You forced yourself out the doors before you could dwell too much more on it. Keeg waved you off, letting you know he would keep watch as you were gone.

You shoved your hands into your pockets as you walked, keeping your head down to avoid the rain as much as possible. You walked as quickly as you could, sticking to the side of buildings to avoid getting drenched in the downpour.

As you crossed over the bridge a few blocks away from the slat, Inej fell into step beside you. You were used to the Suli girl appearing at your side, if It were anyone else you would get startled, but Inej was always a comforting presence. Sometimes you felt like she was a saint, the way she watched over you and the crows. You told her this often, reminding her of how appreciative you were to have a friend like her around.

"Kaz hasn't sent you on any jobs tonight has he?"

Inej shook her head, "No."

You let out a breathy laugh, "Then why were you jumping across the rooftops?"

You knew the answer.

"I feel at home on the roofs, it's my own Ketterdam."

You hummed, taking in her answer. Inej told you about the time she spent training on the highwire as a child, how she loved the feeling of being free so high off the ground. She was brave and unwavering like that and you admired her greatly for it.

As you came up on the Slat, Inej disappeared back into the shadows of the night. She would return to the club, or retire to her room, but she enjoyed climbing her way across Ketterdam and you were happy to let her do so.

The slat was mostly quiet when you entered. Anika and a few other Dregs were drinking and conversing quietly as if not to disturb anyone. You knew it was to not bother Kaz. Although Dirtyhands had put in a lot of effort and money into making the slat warm and dry, voices still carried. Most nights you could hear conversations from the bottom floor all the way in Kaz's attic, it was how you knew whenever Jesper got back. He was loud enough to be heard all over the slat.

You started your climb up the stairs, watching your rain-soaked boots take each step with certainty. Although you climbed these stairs multiple times a day, you still felt as if you might trip down them. They were narrow and steep, a recipe for disaster when the rain made your shoes slippery.

Three floors up, you stopped in your room. It was hardly a room and more of a closet, fitting your cot and dresser and not much else. You truly didn't mind, you were right next door to Inej and you only ever came to your room to sleep or change.

You kicked off your boots and stripped off your socks, replacing them quickly with a dry pair to keep your feet warm. You shrugged off your jacket and hung it on the door handle , with any luck it would dry before you would need it again tomorrow. You slipped out of the room and headed back to the stairs to Kaz's room.

Your feet made no sound as you climbed the steps, the silence of your movements allowing you to listen for Kaz in his room. Most of the time you would hear him shuffling through papers, but tonight there was little noise coming from behind the door. As you reached up to knock you prayed he wasn't sleeping.

"Yes?"

You cracked open the door, surprised to find Kaz wasn't sitting at his desk but standing in front of the small mirror in the corner of the room. He had scissors in his good hand, the other shakingly brushing back his hair from his face.

You had noticed how Kaz's hair had gotten much longer lately. The dark strands often blocking his eyes. You knew it drove him crazy, he hated having his hair in his eyes, but he had been too busy to fix it for now.

Kaz shared how he cut his own hair not long ago, you remembered the conversation vividly. He had caught his reflection in the mirror as he washed his hands in the small basin, asking you if you liked his hair.

You had been surprised, Kaz never cared for what others thought of his appearance. You told him the truth, that you loved his hair. Loved how he took time to cut it and try to style it, to you it showed his quiet care. When you asked why he was suddenly concerned, he mentioned how Nina had teased him about it once. It had been a harmless comment, but to him brought back the fact that he feared others touch so much he couldn't bare to let someone else cut it. So it looked rough, uneven in some parts and sometimes much shorter than he intended. You offered to help him when he was ready, but he had yet to take you up on the offer.

"Kaz," You sighed, taking a tentative step forward as if not to startle him. "You should be resting."

Kaz just frowned at his reflection.

His hands were shaking, you noticed. His right hand with the scissors shook so subtly that you might have missed It if you weren't looking. His other hand gripped tight to the side of the basin, as he fought the pain that throbbed down his bicep.

"I can't stand it anymore," Kaz growled, glaring at the hair that kept flopping in his face.

You chuckled, watching the man glower at his reflection with all his barrel brutality.

Crossing the room towards him, you held out your hand, "Let me help."

Kaz stared at your hand like it was foreign. You waited patiently as he had an internal battle. You felt a pang of sympathy when you watched a look of longing pass over Kaz's face. He wanted to let you help, he wanted nothing more than to feel your hands running through his hair with the tender care you always held. But the waters were always there, right below him. If he let you help, they might just swallow him whole.

Finally, Kaz resigned the scissors to you with a sigh.

You smiled at him, "We'll take it slowly." You promised, "If it gets too much, tell me and we’ll stop."

Kaz nodded.

He watched you in the mirror as you stood behind him, assessing what he had already done and what you would do. You knew he liked it a certain way, you spent enough time staring at him to memorize how it always looked. You made eye contact with Kaz in the mirror.

"Ready?"

Kaz nodded, taking in a deep breath.

You ran your hand through his hair, combing it back off his face with your fingers. You could almost feel how Kaz relaxed, his tense shoulders falling just a little. You took it as a good sign, continuing to gently pull his hair away from his face and start cutting.

It was slow going, you paused every few minutes to remind Kaz to breathe and release the tension in his muscles. You had no intention of making him suffer through his flashbacks alone. So you muttered reassuring words, offering to take a longer break or to step back for a moment as he processed. Kaz would shake his head, refusing to let you move away in case he would never feel you close again.

Your body was so warm he could feel it through the shirt on his back. You were always comforting and warm like a fire on a cold day. Kaz sometimes felt himself leaning into the feeling, leaning into you. Getting close to someone after so many years of pushing everyone away was terrifying for him. But he was determined to work through it, to be worthy of the gentleness and care you bestowed on him.

When you were done, you ran your fingers through his hair one last time. Your fingertips brushed against the skin on the back of his neck. Typically, the feeling would repulse him, send him spiralling into the frigid waves, but now he felt warmth grow from where you touched. He let out a sigh, revelling in the peace that he felt at that moment. It had been so long since skin-on-skin contact had made him feel something other than repulsion, he had almost forgotten what it was like.

You stepped back, placing the scissors on the desk and giving him space. You were buzzing with emotions and you feared they might just burst out of you if you stayed too close.

The room was silent, the only sound coming from you and Kaz's quiet breaths. You could feel your heart beating erratically, it pulsated through your body as you tried to steady it. Kaz was staring at your handiwork in the mirror, his hands running through it and feeling how it reacted. After a few tense moments, he turned to you, the smallest of smiles on his lips.

Kaz's smiles were hard to earn. Often, it felt like his only facial expression was the stern frown he always wore. But every now and again, in the safety of these four walls, his eyes would relax and his lips pull upwards.

The first time Kaz had smiled at you, you had felt drunk. You could live in that moment for a million years and never grow sick of it. His smile was so gentle, it warmed you from the inside out. You searched for that feeling everywhere, but it only ever came when Kaz smiled.

You felt hopelessly lovesick now, staring into the eyes of the bastard of the barrel. He was so different within these walls, still sarcastic and ill-tempered at times, but also gentle and caring. When he allowed himself the chance to feel safe, you could see the little boy from Lij who loved magic and games.

"Thank you."

You could only just hear the words over the roar of your heartbeat, offering Kaz a tight-lipped smile and a wave of your hand.

"It's no problem."

You both stayed silent for a little longer, looking everywhere but at each other. You were brimming with butterflies, the same giddy feeling you got when you had your first crush.

Kaz stood from his perch, slowly limping over to you. You waited as he did so, worried a move might break the spell that overcame you both. You fiddled with your fingers, trying to calm the thoughts racing through your mind.

Kaz reached out a gloved hand, holding your hand to stop your anxious habit. You had held his hand before, mostly when he wore his gloves so that he wouldn't get too overwhelmed, but it always made you feel safe. The most dangerous man in all of Ketterdam was not dirtyhands here, he was Kaz, gentle and loving.

You watched silently as Kaz pulled his hand away and slipped his gloves off. You knew that he preferred to take things slowly, he needed to take things slowly. You were in no rush, you had all the time in the world for the man before you.

Kaz's hands were still shaky, trembling ever so slightly as he reached for you again. He slowly raised his good hand to your face, hesitating before making contact. His eyes held a question, asking kindly for your permission. You accepted with a small nod, unable to help the tiny smile on your lips. Kaz's hand was colder than you were expecting as he cupped your cheek, you were sure he would be able to feel how hot you were. His slender fingers sat against your jawline, his thumb feathering across your cheekbone, like he was exploring your face. You subconsciously leaned into his hand, closing your eyes and letting a sigh slip from your lips. You could live here forever, in this safety and warmth, tucked away from the prying eyes of Ketterdam.

Kaz took a shaky breath in and you pulled away, startled that you might have pushed him too far. He only smiled, taking a small step forward and keeping his hand on your cheek. You could feel his breath on your skin now, the ghosting of his fingers. It almost felt like a dream. Kaz leaned in a little closer, your foreheads almost touching. His eyes flickered from your lips to your eyes and back.

Kaz wanted nothing more than to close the gap between you and press his lips to yours. You were so warm, your face tucked into his hand like it was made to be held by him. Your breath tickled his skin, it reminded him how you were here, alive. Saints, if he could just lean forward and-

All at once the water was snatching him under. The feeling of your skin turning cold and deathly. He lurched back, holding in his gags of disgust as the freezing waters overtook him.

"Kaz?"

He fell backwards, scrambling to put space between you both as he choked on the waters.

You could only watch as Kaz scrambled away from you, unable to do anything to stop him. He pulled himself as far away from you as he could, becoming a mess of shaking and shuddering breaths. He was panicking, the anxiety and fear clearly written across his features. It hurt, you wanted to help him but you feared you might only make it worse.

You knew you wouldn't be able to leave him in such a state, hyperventilating on the floor of his room. So you slowly lowered yourself to the ground, a good meter away from him to not suffocate him.

"I'm here, Kaz," You said softly, watching over him, "You're safe."

He took another few shuddering breaths, but they were slower than the last. You took it as a sign to keep going.

"Take it slow," You spoke just above a whisper, "I'm not going anywhere."

You stayed a safe distance away as Kaz calmed down, watching over him and offering quiet reassurances as he slowly came to himself. When the panic was gone from his eyes, it was replaced with guilt. You knew how hard it was for Kaz to touch skin, you didn't know exactly why, but you didn't mind taking things slow for him.

You cut Kaz before he could say he was sorry, "It's okay."

Kaz reached for his gloves and shoved them on, "It's not."

You shuffled a little closer, "Kaz." The boy looked up at you with his dark eyes, "Truly, it's alright. I will wait for you. If it takes days, weeks or years, I will be here."

Kaz's eyes were glossy, you had never seen him cry but perhaps this was the closest he ever got.

"You, Kaz Brekker, are worth waiting for."

Kaz looked down, "Rietveld."

It caught you entirely off guard, "What?"

Kaz slowly lifted his eyes to yours, "My real name is Kaz Rietveld."

Your face burst into a bright grin, "Well, Kaz Rietveld, it's nice to meet you."

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