#maybe i can find accounting work with a charity or something
Note
Hi!! Can I request Rhys x reader where reader has always kinda been on her own and always been pretty independent until Rhys came into her life? Like Rhys gives her a safe and comfortable space where she can finally relax and not have to worry all the time. Rhys is all like “let me spoil and take care of you.”
Basically helping her realize that it’s okay to let people help you every now and then and still be an independent person.
Let Me, Please Rhysand x Female Reader
Growing up, you relied on yourself for everything. Whatever money you could earn, you hid away out of fear that your father would spend it on alcohol. His drinking habits had all but condemned you. Once you were old enough to leave, you did, never looking back. Everything you had in life you had worked hard for. You never allowed yourself to spend money on anything that wasn't deemed necessary by you as you weren't always sure how you'd earn more.
Even after finding a steady job at a seamstress shop in Velaris, you didn't buy anything extra for yourself or overly expensive. One day your friend Mor had brought her cousin in for a new suit which is how you met Rhys. He was taken with you at first sight and pursued you tirelessly until you agreed to a date. One date had turned into many more until you were officially a couple. He had given you access to his funds, but you refused to spend a penny of his. It didn't seem right no matter how often he informed you that what's his is yours.
One day, he accompanied you on a shopping trip with Mor. The three of you had walked into the new clothing store that had opened. He watched as the two of you browsed until he saw you pick up a dress. The way your face lit up as the sequined dress shimmered in the light. You held it up to you and looked in a nearby mirror. Your eyes were full of admiration and excitement until you looked at the tag. He watched your expression change as you hung it back on the rack.
He walks over to you, "You'd look stunning in that dress, darling." He compliments you. "I don't really have anywhere to wear it." You say making an excuse. "That's not why you put it back." He accuses softly, keeping the conversation private. "It's a little more than I'm comfortable spending." You admit, knowing there's no point in lying. "Put it on my tab." He says casually, "You know you can spend any amount you want." You bite your bottom lip, "No I can't. That's your money. Besides, I have my own for what I need." You tell him. "Get the dress, darling. You'll look gorgeous in it." He practically pleads.
"It's a little out of my price range, maybe another time." You tell him. "Fine, I'll buy it." Rhys tells you as he grabs it from the rack. "I don't need it, Rhysand. Put it back and save your money." You tell him as you reach for the dress. He pulls it out of your grasp and starts towards shoes. "Rhysand! I don't need your charity!" You all but shout, drawing his attention and Mor's along with some other shoppers. Mor comes over to see what is going on. Rhys hands her the dress, "Find shoes and jewelry to go with this dress and make sure you put it on my account." Rhys tells her before guiding you outside and winnowing you home.
He follows you inside and shuts the door. "I'll pay you back for whatever Mor buys." You tell Rhys. "No. Because they are gifts." You cross your arms in front of you, "I don't want your lavish gifts! I'm more than capable of buying what I need." You say as you glare at him. "I have more money than I could spend in a lifetime, I want to spoil you. I want you to have more than you need. I want you to have what you want." He says, grabbing your hands and pulling you into his arms.
"You don't understand." You say softly as you stare at a painting on the wall. "Then help me to understand." He says, pulling your face to look at him. His eyes are searching yours for some sort of answer. "Growing up money wasn't something we had a lot of, and gifts were a form of manipulation." You say sadly. "Living with my father a gift became a debt that would eventually have to be repaid. What money I could manage to earn he would take to pay off his drinking tabs or gambling debts. I learned to rely on myself at an early age, which is partially how I ended up in Velaris, and I learned that a gift is hardly ever a gift." You pull out of his grasp and take a step back, waiting for the look of pity that usually followed when you brought up your past.
"I'm sorry you didn't have the best start to life and have been taught these falsities. I promise when you receive a gift from me or anyone in my family it is purely a gift and nothing is expected in return." He says, pulling me back into his arms. "I will never use money or anything else to try to manipulate you or gain a debt from you." He says, kissing the top of your head. You relax into his arms. "I know, it's just hard to unlearn something so ingrained into your mind." You admit softly. We've got the rest of our lives starting today." Rhys says before he moves to lead you out of the house.
"Now where are we going?" You asked, surprised. "You'll see." He walks you to the largest bookstore in Velaris. "What are we doing here?" You ask. "You're picking out books whatever books you want. You're starting your own collection. I've seen the way you look at Gwyn's collection and how you're always borrowing from her." Rhys takes your hand and leads you inside. He follows you from section to section as you slowly pick out books. Eventually, you loosen up and start adding books more freely. Your face lights up with joy as you pick out some of your favorites.
Rhys follows you to the cashier and gently places your books on the counter. As your total keeps going up you start having anxiety. You start to fidget with the zipper on your wallet. Once the cashier has your books bagged she gives you your total. You start to reach for your money when Rhys gently takes your hand, he gently pulls it to his lips kissing the back of it as a subtle nudge. "You can charge it to Rhysand's account." You tell her. "Of course." She says cheerfully before handing you the bags which Rhys quickly grabs and carries for you.
"Thank you." You tell him as the two of you step outside. "You're welcome, darling. The happiness on your face as you picked out books was worth every penny." He says tucking you into his side as he walked you home. "I do have one more surprise for you." He says as he leads you upstairs. I remodeled this room for you, you're free to decorate it however you'd like along with any furniture you want." He says opening the door to what used to be an empty office. You walk in amazed at the empty shelves lining the walls waiting to be filled.
"You made a library for me?" You ask as you stare in awe at the room. "You needed a place to put your books. He says, placing the bags inside the door. You throw your arms around him, "Thank you so much, love." You say with teary eyes at the effort he went through for you. "It's all yours, darling, no strings attached." He says before kissing you softly.
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Camboy!SKZ Headcanons | Hyung Line
❣ Summary: What it would be like if the SKZ boys were camboys? An idea brought on by @onmykneesforchanlix ❣
❣ Warnings: Camboy AU, kink discussion [daddy kink], sex toys ❣
❣ Additional Tags: Slight crack energy, Chan is referred to as Chris, Changbin is a gym buff
❣ Maknae Line ❣ Stray Kids Masterlist ❣ General Masterlist ❣
Chris
His username would be something painfully simple, like cb97xx or xxWolfChanxx, he’s never escaping the early 2000’s username tropes, I’m sorry.
Started camming to save money for music tech, and he was gonna quit once he earned enough money but he slowly found himself getting hooked on the praise of thousands of unknown faces.
At first he didn’t show his face, keeping the content to shoulders and below, but one night he gets up to turn the stream off and they catch a glimpse of his lips and there’s a rapid fire of tips flooding in;
Would give anything to have those lips on me
What the fuck what the fuck??? Those lips?? So biteable??
Bubblegum pink, new favorite color
From then on, he kept his camera at an angle just high enough to keep his lips in frame.
Definitely finds himself pandering to the daddy kink side of the internet and ends up developing the kink for himself [this is a lie, he knows he’s had it since before the cam boy streams, but who really needs to know that?].
Loves when his fans comment on how good his hands look bc he doesn’t find them appealing himself, but if hundreds of people are begging him to choke them, how could he deny it?
Paints his nails by the recommendation of his subscribers each month, and it turns him on even more when he’s camming and jerking off with his freshly dried polish.
Wants to grow his community and isn’t shy about collaborations with other creators because baby boy is just a social butterfly - no matter if they’re clothed or naked in front of thousands.
Ultimately treats his lives like a genuine livestream, even if his dick is leaking precum in his fist.
Minho
First off; username is leeknowswho, convince me otherwise - man did not care about his username in the slightest
Only made an account to support his other streaming friend, quokkasungie
But when he saw the money he was raking in, he decided to throw his hat into the ring because “Getting off in front of a camera? How hard can it be?”
Spoiler alert - very.
Extremely, when you don’t even use a webcam.
The first few streams were experimental, a black screen with the subtle sound of him jerking off and breathing into the mic - that is, until he read out a chat asking for a description.
“What? So needy you can’t imagine it for yourself?”
Apparently the chatter liked that, and so did a grand number of people after that on his next stream.
Thus, the leeknowswho degradation corner was born, and it’s been a hit for two years and growing.
Constantly teases his viewers, toying with them that maybe one day he’ll turn on his camera, and even going as far as setting a donation goal for him to do so - but the limit is never reached since he often takes part of the money to donate to charities.
“You’d rather see my dick than an organization help get stray kittens off the streets? Yet I’m the fucked up one?”
Sometimes he goes live and doesn’t even jerk off, just doing an asmr stream teasing and degrading and toying with his fans, getting a kick out of the ones actively using his voice to get themselves off.
He’s a menace but the people love him.
Changbin
BinnieDwekki or Dwekkisgym, I really can’t decide but he definitely gives off cute username vibes.
Genuinely wanted to use the platform as a way to document his growth from working out, but of course using a camboy website probably wasn’t the way to go about it.
Has a whole room for his setup - though in reality it’s just his in-home workout room, but who really needs to know the truth - and takes pride in showing off his whole body.
He worked hard for those muscles, why wouldn’t he want to flex in every angle?!
Blushes at the chat messages where people say they want him to choke him with his biceps, or squeeze their head between his thighs until they pop like a watermelon.
Blushes even more at the chats praising his physique and wondering how someone with such a cute face could have such a killer body.
The first time he pulled his dick out on stream was when he was showcasing some of the workouts he does on the daily; the adrenaline and built up energy from his preworkout giving the chat a glorious reveal of the thick outline in his compression shorts.
Fuck choking me with your arms, choke me out on your cock
There wasn’t much left to the imagination, and with the addition of that chat message he figured that maybe taking care of the problem on stream wouldn’t be a bad idea.
And boy, was it the best decision he’d ever made.
If his fans weren’t on board for the strained grunts and breathless groans from him working out on camera, then they definitely were for the dick that looked just as beefy as he was.
His version of being a camboy is probably the most wholesome out there, ranging from motivational talks and advice moments [while shirtless, of course] to being stark naked and jacking off after a live workout session.
Hyunjin
Another one who signed up with intent - and hear me out.
He wanted to use the money to help get him into art school, but after seeing his first major check after the span of a few months, he figured he could get on well without it.
Username is princehhj, he knows how to pander to his features which helped him grow a fanbase like it was nothing.
Has been camboying the longest out of the hyung line.
He also has a set for his streams, but it’s just a corner of his art studio where he has a cozy little couch where he can stretch out on [in more ways than one].
His streams usually involve toys of various types; silicon grinders, fleshlights, buttplugs, dildos - his collection isn’t one to joke about, only using his hand got boring after the first week of streaming.
Most of the time he doesn’t even have to be doing anything explicit, simply sitting there with his pretty black hair tied back into a ponytail, a bottle of lube and a toy or two sitting right beside him is enough for the donations to come rolling in.
His favorite toy to use is his tenga egg - the stretchy plastic egg fits perfectly in his palm and doesn’t take too much concentration to use, which makes it easier for him to read his chat and reply as if he’s not touching himself.
Aside from the toys, however, he may also have one or two sets of lingerie that he brings out on milestone streams as a treat to the scream [and himself]. Nothing too wild, just your simple lace panty set and garters, and the chat goes wild for it.
Can you truly blame them though? He’s the prettiest prince out there.
❣ Any type of feedback is appreciated! Whether it be a simple like, reblog, or keyboard smash and the most essay-like comment, feel free to share your thoughts. ❣
#skz fanfic#skz smut#camboy au#stray kids headcanons#bang chan smut#lee know smut#changbin smut#hyunjin smut#kacii's masterlist#stray kids imagines#Camboy!SKZ
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I didn’t post this on the wrong account you did-
Chapter 2: investigations and superstitions
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Inside the Watchtower, the League was fighting over who should go to Amity. Flash was the first one to speak up, slamming a fist on the table for everyone’s attention. “We need supers there! It would be safer considering we could properly fight without much risk!” Hal huffed out on the other side of the room, glaring at Barry.
“Are you kidding? The town has reports of possession! What’s gonna happen if a super gets possessed?” Everyone hushed at the thought of being possessed, the situation slowly sinking in.
“I will go.” Batman spoke up from the head of the table, all eyes turning to him.
“I can take some of the Robins with me, and disguise it as a charity event. I’m the most reasonable to go since I would have an alibi.”
The table went silent at the statement. Batman watched as the idea slowly set into everyone’s heads. “That might actually work. Afterall, he has kids who would be able to get close to Danny, and as they do that, Bats here would be able to get close with the locals and find out if it's truly just a kids trend.”
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“Yooo Danny, did you see that your video went viral?” Tucker casually dropped over the comms as Danny was patrolling around Amity.
“I’m sorry, it went what?” Danny halted in the hair for a minute before dipping down into the park. “Ya dude! The Zone has been trending for a while now, and someone found yours. Everyone has left comments saying that you’re the ‘chosen one’ cause so far you have the only clear footage inside.” Sam started to laugh over the comms as Danny let out a groan. “Dude! You accidentally made a parody of your parents!” This time Danny wasn’t able to react fast enough to the comment, slamming into a wall as a result.
“You’ve got to be kidding me. I did not.” He quickly sat down on a roof, pulling out his own phone before pulling up the video he posted only a week ago. He made it because tears in between the two realms were becoming more common, and as Phantom, he had already had to help a few people escape. It wasn’t meant to go viral, just help. Although getting attacked by Shulker at the end and leaving it in probably wasn’t the best idea. Danny also knew that his parents were still decently active on their channel, and while he could see their videos, Tucker had worked it out so that they could never see his. While he hadn’t watched their videos, Sam and Tucker did, explaining why they found the connection.
Do you think people will realize we are related?” Danny asked as he looked over the town. He fiddled with his phone as he did. It had now been two years now since the accident, and most of the rogues respected him enough now to leave him alone during the school day. He had finally gotten his grades back up to a decent level, though they still bothered him at night. “I doubt that they won’t. Your parents’ videos are already pretty popular since, even though they are wrong, they were the only videos explaining what the zone even was.” Tucker explained over the comms as Danny snapped out of his thoughts. “What if you did more though?” Sam cut into the conversation. “Did more of what?” Danny asked her, deciding that he could head home now.
“Make more parodies of your parents' old videos! You can correct their theories while also drawing attention. And by not outright saying your relation to them, you can become this online cryptid of the Zone.” Sam explained, clicking being heard on her side of the line as she started typing something.
“You're telling us that Danny should make a youtube channel about the Zone? Isn’t the whole reason we haven’t posted about it before is to keep it safe?” Tucker asked Sam, confusion lacing his voice. “Well why not! We obviously don’t give away the major bits and pieces, like the fact that ancients are real, and maybe nothing about phantom for safety, but we can explain how it's dangerous, and why people shouldn’t actively try to find the zone. Sure Danny’s first video might confuse them, since he willingly went inside, but if we take it down and start anew, we could make safety psa’s on what to do if it does happen!” Sam exclaimed with an excited voice, Danny’s gears grinding in his mind at the implications. “I think that’s a good idea… Tucker, how fast do you think you can take the old video down?” Danny phased through his wall, landing in his room before transforming back and rushing to his computer.
“I can get in down in ten minutes, do we want a proper channel name this time?” Tucker replied, clicking now resounding from his end. “Oh, oh! Call it ‘Into The Zone!’ It can add to the cryptid vibes that you're gonna try to give off.”Danny grinned as he opened YouTube,“Do it!” He called out over the call, watching as the video he posted only a week ago disappeared, the fifty thousand views it had gathered disappearing down the drain with it as well.
“We need to script the next video, and find a video of your parents’ that we can take from and fix.” Sam said, pulling up his parents' old channel as she went through their videos to find one they could steal. “We should probably make the psa video first, a channel intro of sorts that explains the danger of the zone before they watch anything else.” The trio set to work writing a quick script, planning out the new channel late into the night.
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“Battsssss! We’ve got a problem!” Flash called out, the youtube video he had been reviewing now gone from his screen.
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@dannyphantomphan @letsbegoblingods @thexfile4o4 @d-j-t-15 @queen-of-the-grapefruits @wildbacon @itshype @arend000-blog @elvesandlanterns @mimilikey @may-rbi @miraculousandmore @luffyrose @aroanorth-west @lunaria618 @blackrabbitt3t @mnemovoid @ultimatebluff @kgne-k @stargirl1331 @arc-777 @ghoststoneguard @dolfay @midnightenigma @trainer-sean @evana-47 @d4ydr34min9 @kyrianclawraith @thegatorsgoose @britcision @jesimilu @tealty @eonic @newgraywolf @fisticuffsatapplebees
I hope I didn’t miss anyone!
#dc x dp#dc x dp prompt#danny phantom#batman#dcmultiverse#Danny your giving the bat an aneurysm#tucker your not helping
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Let's get into the Angel Pt 1 controversy
Summary of Roo's Point: Please follow your conscience but do not bash Jimin for other people's crimes.
More in-depth analysis of the underlying issues:
Let me start by saying I'm a musical theater geek so I have no idea who any of the other artists on the Angel Pt 1 track are, I don't know their music, I don't know their backstories, and frankly, I don't really care to. But yesterday a full kerfuffle kicked off on Twitter with many people ready to cancel Jimin (and by extension, ARMY) for working on a song with someone called Kodak Black.
Who is Kodak Black?
Well, apparently he's a rapper who brought a high schooler back to his hotel from a concert and then ripped her clothes off and bit her and raped her but he entered a plea deal and got probation for it. Not to be confused for the times he had illegal fire arms, committed armed robbery, possessed marijuana, and tried to evade police. Or the time he punched and kicked a woman at a strip club. By all accounts he sounds like a total asshole, and not someone whose pockets I want to line with my hard-earned money, even if I weren't a survivor, myself.
I think we can all agree that Kodak Black is not the kind of person ARMY would ever want to support.
So if at any point you feel like you cannot get behind the Fast X movie or soundtrack because Universal chose to employ that man? Please feel free to boycott and sleep easy at night. That's your value-based decision and I respect it. Don't let anyone call you an anti for it.
However.
There is another legitimate take on this with regard to Park Jimin, and it's a bit more nuanced than simply "don't work with bad people."
For a decade, we've gotten to know who Park Jimin is. He is kind. He is considerate. He is gentle. He has excellent manners. He gives to charity. He obeys and honors his parents and elder members. He has never been violent. He has never broken the law. He respects women deeply. He is a hard worker. He is a good human being.
I can't help but recall how Jimin had absolutely no idea that the song he made was going to be in Eternals. Like, he didn't believe it at first.
Clearly, this company has some serious issues with communication and the handling of Jimin's releases. I could say more but we don't have all day for that.
It is therefore plausible to me that Jimin was approached for this song, possibly by Jvke. Jimin has said he's seen all the movies so we know he likes the franchise. Maybe he said sure, he'd love to sing for Angel Pt 1. So he recorded his parts and moved on to the next amazing groundbreaking industry-shattering piece of work on his schedule. And then Universal brought in other artists and no one said a thing to him about it.
And you might think there's NO WAY Hollywood wouldn't tell you who all you're working with. Listen, I never worked on any big productions, but I lived in LA for years and worked in entertainment long enough to know you could make something and months later find out it's a whole other thing with people you've never heard of, and you signed off your work and likeness so it is what it is and you gotta live with it and not make waves, especially if you ever wanna work in that town again.
Then again, maybe Jimin met the rest of the artists during the filming of the music video. Maybe he knew Kodak Black was on this song. Maybe he, like me, had no idea of that man's past and never once imagined someone with a rap sheet that long would be in such a large-scale production in the first place.
Or maybe he did know, because it appears Kodak Black is billed as a "creator" of the song, but as an industry professional, he also knows nothing is ever totally clean or pure in this business. So oftentimes in entertainment, you will see people mentally separate the art from the business.
(Side note: To be honest, nothing is ever clean or pure that you pay to consume. The wage slaves sweating in the shops that make the clothes on your back or the device you're reading this post off of. The migrant workers toiling for pennies and living in communal shacks for the veggies in your salad. The animals crammed into horrific crates and slaughtered inhumanely that end up on your plate. The earth that's raped every time you write on a sheet of paper or put gas in your car. The plastics in all of our products are also in our landfills, our oceans, our blood streams. We all of us live and consume off the suffering of others. Doesn't mean we shouldn't fight for a better world--of course we should--I'm just saying, none of us consume anything that's "perfect" and cancel culture fails to acknowledge that.)
Which brings me back to the point about boycotting. If you feel like you just cannot support the business of employing someone like Kodak Black, that is a worthy choice and no one should bully you for it or label you an anti. But please do not consider Jimin "tainted by association." Because everyone is associated in one way or another with harmful people and practices. You'd never get to consume anything ever, if you could only consume things made by "good" people.
For my part, I don't believe Universal will see people refusing to stream or buy Angel Pt 1 and think "Gosh, we shouldn't have hired a man who batters and abuses women, it will hurt our bottom line on this soundtrack, we were very mistaken, let's do better." Maybe they will, but probably they won't. They have yet to even witness the buying power of ARMY anyway so they have no results to compare a boycott to. It's already a done deal and they will likely pull this shit again if it's expedient to do so.
On the other hand, this is Jimin's first OST for a major motion picture and I intend to support the hell out of it. I think it's a good song and I want Jimin to be seen by the industry as a safe bet to bring in numbers. I think the more projects he has, the more opportunities he has to promote good people and good music as alternatives. I say this AS A SURVIVOR OF SEXUAL ASSAULT who is no way making light of sexual assault. It frankly galls me that by association, Kodak Black (and numerous other unknown assholes) will benefit. But I'd rather that than, by association, Park Jimin suffer.
And I'll square with you: I think Justin Bieber, Charlie Puth, Park Jay, and others are opportunistic assholes problematic and it galls me that they will benefit by association with BTS members. But on a case by case basis, I will choose whether to support BTS members' collaborations. So far, I'm still all in. That's what feels right for me, according to MY conscience.
I cannot dictate to you what your conscience should tell you. That's between you and your soul, and it's no one else's business. Do your will and harm none. Trust yourself and honor your limits.
So if at any point you feel like you cannot support JK's Dreamers because of the horrible inhuman treatment of the World Cup stadium workers, abstain. If you cannot support Jimin with Angel Pt 1 because of Kodak Black's inexcusable violence, abstain.
But please do not lay the crimes of others at BTS' feet. They are responsible only for themselves, and we have seen they are sometimes not given complete information around their projects. I'm certain they do their best. When it's clear that a collaboration would go against their values (such as playing for their current president's inauguration), they decline. When they have the opportunity to make informed decisions, they usually decide well. But not always, because the members are human too.
I guess my point of this ramble is... human beings will be human. They are flawed. They inevitably make mistakes. Intention goes a long way. I can make a pretty clear-cut case that Kodak Black intentionally caused harm. So I'm happy to not support his art or business ventures and I hope after a lot of soul searching he becomes a better person but I'm not holding my breath. However, I cannot make a clear-cut case that Park Jimin endorses the harm Kodak Black caused just because he lent his voice to a song Kodak Black is also now a part of. Not yet, not without Park Jimin making a statement defending Kodak Black.
Until he does, I'm not going to hold Jimin responsible for anyone's choices except his own. I trust Jimin. He's earned it. So I'm going to support Jimin.
If you very strongly feel like I'm choosing to do harm here, that I'm anti-feminist, or a rape apologist, or a fan girl making light of serious crimes, please protect yourself and block me. You go ahead and do what you need to do to police your own experience. But I worry that eventually you are going to find yourself in a very lonely, very sparse and dull echo chamber, because that sad truth is... nothing and no one is pure. Certainly not in business, and rarely in art. Considering one out of four women will be sexually assaulted in their lifetimes, it's a safe bet that almost every song or movie you've heard of is somehow benefitting a man who was part of it and who has also abused a woman. I know k-pop idol culture heavily manufactures this PG13 image of artists but the truth is the world of entertainment is a cesspool and a viper pit, and we are very lucky to stan seven artists who are, by and large, truly good people. That's super rare.
My unsolicited advice is to take everything on a case-by-case basis and listen to your gut. Support Angel Pt 1. Don't support Angel Pt 1. It's a deeply personal choice what you endorse with your money.
But please miss me with trying to cancel Jimin, or any of the members, for other people's crimes.
Shunning, dogpiling, mobbing, shaming--cancelling people--those are Mean Girl tactics, designed to make people afraid to work with the "unworthy" and it doesn't work in the long run. (Extended, organized boycotts do work because money talks loud. So feel free to boycott if you want to.) But ruining people's reputations because of who their coworkers happen to be is in no way helping solve the actual problem.
If your goal is to make it so big studios don't employ rapists, keep the heat on the rapist and call out Universal and Kodak Black.
If your goal is to support Jimin, then trust and support Jimin and his songs.
Where those two goals conflict, trust your gut. That's all anyone can ask of you.
For my part, I choose Jimin.
Whatever choice you make--as long as you aren't bashing Jimin--I can respect it.
That's pretty much all I have to say about that. Feel free to disagree but keep it kind and respectful in the comments, please...
Love,
Roo
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Shoe and book
Title: Shoe and book.
Ship: Steve Rogers X Reader.
Word count: 322 words.
Square: D1 “Cinderella story.”
Rating: Teen.
Summary: Steve found a book and shoe.
Major Tags: Fluff.
Additional tags: This is my entry to @cabottombingo Captain Bottom Bingo round 2. CABB2024.
Links: Wattpad, Ao3, Spanish version.
@saiyanprincessswanie
My native language is Spanish so I wanna improve my writing skills in English if you notice any mistakes, please let me know and I will correct them.
I don’t give any kind of permission for my fics to be posted on other platforms or languages (I translate myself my work) or the use of my graphics (my dividers are included in this), I did them exclusively for my fics, please respect my work and don't steal it. There are some people here who make dividers that anyone can use, mine is not this type, please look for the other people. The only exception is the ones I gifted 'cuz now belong to someone else. If you find any of my works on a different platform and are not one of my accounts, please let me know. Reblogs and comments are always welcome.
DISCLAIMER: I don't own Marvel's characters (unfortunately), except for the original characters and the story.
Add yourself to my taglist here.
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Everything had changed since your father remarried. You didn't blame him; he was still young, and it had been many years since your mother had passed away. The only problem was that your father travelled a lot because of his job. He always felt you were a little out of place in his own home.
On the other hand, Steve longed for a deeper connection—not exactly with his teammates—something beyond missions and superhero duties.
One day, the city was threatened. You were leaving the bookstore when, without knowing how you were in the middle of the battle, you started evacuating people; however, that caught Steve's attention.
At the end of the battle, Steve began to look for you, but the only thing he found was your shoe and a book. He had not been able to see you well, but that did not matter; he was determined to find you, no matter how long it took him.
Several weeks had passed and Steve still had no luck, so Tony suggested an idea, so Steve decided to organize a charity event in town, inviting everyone to attend.
As soon as you saw the announcement of the event, you didn't hesitate to go. Maybe you could donate some books.
The night seemed to go by fast; Steve was getting desperate that he couldn't find you. Soon it would be midnight, and you had to go back to catch the last train. You would say to yourself on the way out when you bumped into Steve.
“That's my shoe! “you exclaimed in surprise, then you saw his other hand. "And that's my book."
“How do I know they're really yours?" Steve asked in surprise, not sure whether to believe it.
“The sole has a heart drawn on it, and the book has the fifth paragraph on page 200 underlined."
Steve checked, and after several minutes of talking, he invited you to the movies.
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When I Get Home (Hawks x Black!Fem!Reader 18+ Angsty One Shot)
"Can really love a monster like me?"
Pairing: Keigo Takami x Black!Fem!Reader
Synopsis: In which Keigo realizes how truly lucky he is to have you by his side despite his refusal to open up to you and show you how deep his scars run, so he decides when he finally gets home from his stupid fucking mission, he’ll show you his scars, his heart, and everything more.
Story Warnings: MAJOR MANGA/ANIME SPOILERS (BEWARE!), Smutty Smut, 18+ (MINORS GTFO), Angsty Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Crying, Arguing, Mentions & Use of Marijuana, High Sex, Shower Sex, Possessiveness, Scar Appreciation, Edge Play, Sensitivity, Marking, Biting, Foreplay, Cunnilingus, Deepthroating, Doggystyle, Mating Press, Begging, Vocal, Subby, Feral Hawks, Unprotected Sex, Creampie, Facial, Wing-Stroking, Breeding Kink, Aftercare
Disclaimer: I own none of the characters mentioned in this fic. However, as this is my writing, I do not give permission for my work to be reposted on any other sites that are not from my own accounts. Thank you!
Writer’s Note: Got another one shot for y'all and it's my first Hawks fic!! I love me some of that birb man. I was listening to Faith Evan's "Soon As I Get Home" & got inspired lol. Enjoy! AND FUCK ENDEAVOR. -Jazz
*********
Keigo hates the rain.
It reminds him too much of his childhood days when he would aimlessly wander through the wet streets of his childhood home of Kyushu, looking for shelter and a place to lay his head and tired wings, too wet and weak to fly.
A rainy night like this reminds him too much of those nights where he would escape his home to find solace in the streets, only to get nothing but some firsthand experiences of the hostility and black-heartedness of humanity: crime; abuse; violence. He’d find himself in the slums, surrounded by the degenerates of Kyushu, soaked to the bone in rain, shivering his poor little feathers off.
But now, sitting and watching the sheets of rain fall along the city, his legs dangling off of one of the highest buildings in downtown Musutafu, he finds the rain a little comforting. Especially given his circumstances.
He is in his hero gear, gloves, goggles and boots included. He isn’t sure why he decided to change into it before he left the penthouse, but something told him just to do it. After all, a hero’s job is never done. Maybe he just might get lucky and find himself stopping a robbery or a carjacking to distract himself. He’d need a lot of it to make himself feel less like shit for tonight.
Whenever he closes his eyes, all he sees is you and the hurt in your pretty, brown eyes. Those eyes he wants to stare into forever. How could he hurt you so badly? How could a night that went as well as it could go at a charity ball end in such turmoil for the both of you?
“Fuck,” he hisses, his head dropping into his hands as the memories of the past few hours begin to rewind in his head:
“I just wanna know who she is to you,” you declared as you sat on the couch in your shared living room hours later. You were still in your gown from tonight–bright crimson to match Keigo’s wings, your hair curled to perfection and your heels making your legs look fantastic. He stared at you from the kitchen then while you unstrapped your Steve Madden heels, his hands itching to do it for you.
“Why?” he asked, doing his best to not scoff at the question. “There’s nothin’ to tell, Y/N; I told you that.” As he headed into the kitchen, he loosened his tie with one hand and popped a button to his Armani button-down, glad to be out of his suit jacket and shoes. Though he looked good, he felt like a little kid being forced to dress for church.
He went into the back where the walk-in pantry and wine cellar is to get himself a much-needed, chilled bottle of Merlot wine. When he returned to the kitchen, he glanced at you from across the marbled kitchen island. You were already staring at him from the living room, your red dress standing out against black couch.“But she isn’t a friend to you?” You asked, sounding agitated at his answer.“Or a coworker? You barely introduced me to her tonight, Keigo.”
Now Keigo was agitated even though he shouldn’t have been. But damn, you always did this. You always tried to dig into him at the worst possible moments. Especially during a moment where all he’s trying to do is just relax after a night of acting.“Why the fuck does it matter?” He scoffed flippantly.
Your eyes flared angrily at him.“First of all, don’t talk to me like that,” you sternly said, jabbing one acrylic nail at him.“You don’t have to be like that, okay? We’re just having a conversation here.”
Keigo turned his back to you to get the corkscrew out the drawer next to the $800 stove with its electric stove top and Stirling steel oven.“No,” he argued, bumping his hip against the drawer to shut it.“What you’re doing right now is putting me on the spot when you know tonight took a lot out of me. You know I’m not built for shit like that wack ass fuckin’ ball, Y/N.”
You gaped at him, dumbfounded.“I told you we didn’t have to go tonight, Keigo!” you protested, anger evident in your tone.“You wouldn’t listen to me!”
You crossed those gorgeous legs over each other, the light glowing against your skin still shining with coconut oil. Keigo was initially excited to get you home tonight just to feast on those legs and perhaps fuck you in that dress before stripping it off of you. It was the only thing he had looked forward to for tonight despite being forced by the Hero Commission to attend that stupid charity ball to prove that Japan’s heroes were “conscious of civilians’ needs all over the nation”.
It isn't that he hated charity. He wasn’t an asshole. He made sure to give his portion to hospitals, animal shelters, and homeless shelters all over Japan. He just hated being forced to put up with the annoying reporters and cameras in his face all night while he pretended to enjoy socializing with people that weren't his cup of tea and his nosey coworkers.
He especially wasn’t looking forward to it when you had asked to go with him. He hadn’t ever taken you to a ball or any kind of event that was associated with his hero work in the time you’ve been dating him, but you understood the strict ways of the Hero’s Commission and how it was important for Keigo to keep up his “bachelor” image for as long as he could to gain more popularity.
At least, that’s what you told him when he explained things to you.
He had figured tonight wouldn’t be a big deal since security kept the paparazzi and reporters outside the venue, so he let you come along and met you inside the building after he was done dealing with the zoo animals with their note pads and microphones on the red carpet.
However, he quickly realized how bad of a decision that was when his coworkers began swarming, asking him who “the beauty” was sitting with him; how you were; how long you two have been together; where he’s been hiding you at.
And then, of course, Wanna had to show up. Fucking Kanna! Keigo would have rather had forgotten she existed, but there she was, in the flesh in her skin-tight dress with her publicist. She was a simple fling; a past summer he spent with a model before he met you. That was a different time for him. A time where he didn't give a fuck where he stuck his dick because he was desperate to rid himself of the nightmares for a night in someone’s bed.
But seeing his past and his hopeful future interact the way you and Kanna did after Kanna made a show of throwing herself at Keigo and making conversation made him want to off himself right there. Especially when he saw your face when he didn’t introduce you to Kanna–disappointment; confusion; hurt. So much hurt.
But you didn’t understand. And though you never will, Keigo knows that it is for the best.
“Correction: you didn’t have to go,” he cooly stated.“But I do! Are you forgetting I’m pro no. 2? Publicity matters. If I wasn’t there, the whole fuckin’ nation’s eyes would’ve been on me wondering where I was and coughing up shit for the next magazine cover.”
He huffed to himself as he turned away from you once more to jab the screw into the cork to try and open the wine. When that didn’t work, he flung the cork screw away, nearly breaking it, and took the cork into his mouth. He pulled on the damn thing until it finally popped out of the nozzle. He then spat it out and reached above to grab himself a wine glass from the suspended wine glass rack before pouring himself a much-needed glass and taking a long gulp.
As soon as the wine was in his system, he felt an inch better, but that anger at himself still chugged in his veins. Anger for not being real with you. For never telling you the truth. For never being the man you deserved.
A tense silence coated the air between you in his penthouse. Ever since you started visiting since the first night you spent the evening with him in his bed, you’ve been here more than at your own apartment. Keigo doesn’t mind one bit. He feels so at home with you here, but even when you aren’t together, he feels at home with you….so why can’t he make you feel the same way?
“Keigo, I didn’t mean to upset you,” you finally sigh.“I just felt like tonight you didn’t really want me there. I felt like you were embarrassed with me.”
His eyes widen at the confession and fear grips him. ‘Oh, no,’ he lamented internally. ’Oh, no, no, no.’ That was the last thing he wanted to make you feel like ever. When he looked over at you, you had a despondent, oh-so sad look on your pretty, beat face. All because of his stupidity. “Why would you think that?” he all but whispers.
“You barely looked at me,” you reply, your voice soft and defeated. “Barely touched me. Half of your coworkers didn’t even know you had a girlfriend, Kei.”
Keigo pinched the bridge of his nose. He thought you’d been through this already.“You know why I can’t just go public with my relationships, Y/N. Don’t even start with this shit.”
You stared at him for a moment, sizing him up, and for a moment, he thought you might start wilding on him. Your silence scared him even more though.“C’mon now,” he tiredly sighed. “It’s been a long night. Can’t we just forget tonight and roll somethin’ up?” He gave you a smile, hoping you’d say yes to some wine, some smoke, and some much-needed TLC after tonight’s events.
But instead, you gave him a tight-lipped stare with a wall behind your eyes that made him realize that he’d be getting none of that tonight with you. He watched in utter defeat as you rose from the couch and strutted away upstairs to your bedroom, never turning to look back at him.
When he heard the door slam behind you, he knew he fucked up. Epically. He put his head in his hands, feeling like screaming until his throat was raw, but he knew that would do nothing to fix this. This was a reoccurring problem between you two; one that always seemed to end in arguments and nights where he spent spent either on the couch or out among the skies.
The truth was he wanted to desperately open up to you. He wanted to tell you why he hated every social event the Hero Commission forced him to attend.
Why he hated the entire organization he worked for so passionately, but still allowed himself to be manipulated and exploited to save others.
Why he had trouble sleeping and drinking habits.
Why he never tells you about the past hookups and flings.
Why he would sometimes smoke an entire bag of weed to rid himself of those horrible, itching thoughts of the past.
Why he never visited his mother.
Why he never visited Dabi in prison and who he was to you outside of a mortal enemy.
Why he feels like he is undeserving of any success or good thing in his life.
Why he hates himself.
Why he doesn’t truly love himself at all.
But he can’t lose you, and he knows if he were to ever reveal who he is behind the dazzling smile and charm, you would be gone for good. It’s better to keep those wounds closed anyway.
You didn’t seem to think the same though. A half an hour later, while Keigo was sitting on the same couch you abandoned with his second glass of wine and the balcony door cracked to let in some of that cool spring air, you returned to the living room. You were out of your dazzling outfit from tonight, your face scrubbed free of makeup and only wearing one of his old shirts. You looked amazingly sexy to him like this.
But he didn’t try to make a move or grab at you as you sat down. He didn’t even look at you. He knew you were there for a reason. You reached a hand out to stroke the burn scar that jet from the side of his jaw down to the column of his neck. “Your burn is healing,” you softly pointed out. “You know, you never really told me what happened to get you that.”
Your fingers gently stroked his jaw, tentative and tender. “You never asked,” Keigo muttered, sipping on his Merlot. You leaned your head against the back of the couch, giving him a soft-eyed stare. “That’s ‘cause you’d never tell.”
Keigo did his best to keep calm, but he hated this game you were playing with him. You were crossing a line with him here. He finally looked at you, accusingly.“What are you doing, huh?” He uttered, irked.“Why are you doing this?”
“Doing what?” You asked. “I’m only asking you a question, Kei.” You truly didn’t know which pissed him off even more. “No, you’re trying to act like you’re asking a question when really, you’re poking the bear and blowin’ my buzz.”
His tone was harsh and so are his words, but they were enough to coax you to speak your mind. You sat up and hugged your knees to your chest as you stared at him.“You never tell me about your scars.”
Keigo flinched at your statement and his ghosts of scars littering his body seemed to itch.“That’s not true.”
“It is,” you protested, your voice strained. You sounded close to tears and that hurt him even more. “You never share anything with me. Nothing about your missions, your friends, your past, nothing. I feel like I barely know you and we’ve been together for a year!”
The frustration you were feeling was evident in your voice. Keigo sighed, placing his wine glass down on the glass coffee table in front of him. He looked at you, noticing how exhausted you looked aside from your irritated: dark circles under your eyes, a tight jaw.“Y/N, it’s just hard, okay? It’s not that simple to just tell you shit like that.”
“Even though I have?” you retorted harshly, tilting your head to give him a fixed, sideways stare.“I’ve told you everything about me from the jump, Keigo. Even the things I wouldn’t even tell my closet friend! Don’t I deserve the same transparency?”
Keigo heaved an exhausted sigh and ran his hands down his face. In the darkness behind his hands, he saw Twice’s body go limb, the blade of Keigo’s sword impaling his body.“I’ve done some fucked up shit,” he whispered into his hands.
You placed a hand on his back.“I’d never judge you,” you promised. "We all make mistakes and none of us are perfect.”
‘But you are,’ he thought. You are more than perfect. Way too much for someone like him. “I just can’t, okay?” he huffed, moving away from your touch. He ignored the hurt in your eyes. “Some things are just too painful to go back to, and I’d think with as much as you love and respect me, you’d respect my decision to keep things to myself.”
“Well, I don’t!” you shouted abruptly, standing up to glare down at him. “So…now what?”
Keigo stared up at you, feeling a flood of emotions begin to swarm him: gratefulness for your determination and stubbornness; confusion as to why you want someone like him; and anger for your refusal to leave this alone. He just wants to protect you from the messiness of himself. Why can’t you see that?
The words are out before he can stop them and he regrets having that second glass:“Why are you so hellbent on making me your fuckin’ project, huh?” he cooly asked you, his voice as cold as ice.
Your glared softened a bit.“What are you talking about?”
He stood up too, giving you a sharp glare that made all of the color in your face drain.“You look at me as this tragic hero you’re tryna fix, don’t you?” he snapped. “I may have the sob story that almost every fuckin’ pro has, but I’m not a puzzle for you to figure out and I don’t appreciate being seen as that.”
You gaped at him, your mouth open agape.“Are you serious right now?” you scoffed incredulously.“Keigo, I’m only trying to get to you to know you. And you’re not a project or a puzzle–you’re an amazing, passionate man that I adore and I just want to fuckin’ know you!”
The scream ripped from your throat after being buried under months of frustration and stress. Keigo could hear it as clear as day. He stood there, shocked, as you began to break down, your hands covering your face as you cried.
“Is that too much?” you sobbed into the open air.“Why won’t you let me in? Why won’t you let me see you?” He could see every ounce of frustration and hurt that he was causing you begin to take its toll, rolling down your cheeks in fat tears that plopped onto the cherrywood floor below your painted toes.
Keigo immediately strode over to you and closed the gap between your bodies by wrapping his arms around you. He held you as you quietly sobbed into his chest, gripping his arms as you did. He felt horrible. He had never felt more like shit for making you feel like this.“I’m sorry,” he whispered.“It’s not that I don’t want to, baby bird. But I’m just too ugly.”
You stared up at him, astounded at his confession. “Just trust me on this, okay? You’d need a fuckin’ team to help clean this mess up. I don’t want to burden you with that.”
“But you’re not a burden!” you protested, tears in your pretty eyes.“You’re anything but a burden to me, Kei! I just wanna understand you.”
You cupped his face in your hands, forcing him to stare at you.“Why do you feel the need to hide yourself from me?” You implored, begging him to answer.
He groaned tiredly, gently taking your hands off of his face. “Y/N, just drop it, alright?” he implored. He turned, wanting to walk away from this entire situation.
You followed, ever the stubborn one. “But why–“
“I said drop it!” Keigo bellowed, and his wings flared before he could stop them, his feathers sharpening to points. You frozen immediately, your eyes widening in fear like a deer in headlights.
He and you were both shocked at Keigo’s sudden change in demeanor. He had never reacted this way towards you, because you were never perceived as a threat to him. But something in his hawk-like instincts saw you as one right now. In that brief moment, you were a villain to him, and that frightened him beyond words.
Quickly, his muscles loosened and he fluffed his feathers out, lowering his wings down against his back. “Y/N,” he began softly, wanting to apologize. But it was too late. Instantly, you turned around and sprinted away from him until you were up the stairs and slamming the guest room door behind you once again.
Keigo was left standing there, feeling like the worse person on the planet. And he was. His head began to fill with every negative thought that haunted him at night: You’re a loser. You’re a fake. You’re a horrible boyfriend. You don’t deserve her. You should just leave so she can find someone better.
So what does Keigo do when his head is his worst enemy? He goes out and patrols.
He finished his wine before heading upstairs to his bedroom and entering his walk-in closet to suit up. After putting on his hero gear, he passed by your room. Though the door is unlocked, he knocked anyway and waited for your little grunt of acknowledgement before he entered. You were sitting in the black armchair facing the small balcony of your guest room, your legs tucked against your chest.
You didn't face him when he slid inside. “I’m gonna go out and patrol,” he said, getting right to the point. “You know the alarm code to turn it on, right?”
“I’ve got it, Keigo,” you muttered numbly. “Just go.” You still didn’t look at him and it pained him greatly. “I’ll be back tonight as soon as I can,” he weakly said, trying to vain to ease the fire he caused.
“Don’t bother,” you grumbled. “Just go. I’ll see you whenever you get back…if you decide to come back.”
Realizing you were never going to acknowledge his presence, Keigo silently left your room, his heart breaking in two. He then strode over to the balcony in his living room, slipped out the door he left unlocked specifically for himself, and took off from the terrance, his crimson wings flapping into the night.
He has been out here since, desperately trying to clear his head as he stares into the night and the rain. He stares up at the sky, watching the droplets fall. "Give me some answers here,” he pleads, not sure who he’s talking to–God; the rain; the universe.
Almost as if he is heard, his work phone suddenly rings. He usually keeps it in the pocket of his hero gear pants, fully-charged, of course.
He slips it out and looks down at the caller ID, finding the HPSC chief’s name on his screen.
“Fuck,” he mutters, rolling his eyes. He knows that whatever it is, it can’t be good. He answers the call with an annoyed, “Hawks.”
“We need you out and patrolling,” the HPSC chief bluntly said, his voice gruff and aggressive. “We got another tip on the villain that has currently been terrorizing the city since the beginning of the month. A couple of civilians reported that they spotted him near the bridge. We’ve already got Mirko and a couple of others down there patrolling in different areas. We need you to join in case he attacks and civilians may need help.”
Immediately, Keigo rises from his spot on the building and cracks his neck. “Got it. I’ll be there in five.” As soon as he hangs up, he stretches out his wings and proceeds to head towards the bride that hangs above the Musutafu river, doing his best to fly among the pounding rain and thunder.
When he finally makes it to the bridge, he finds himself breathless at the chaos: the bridge is completely cut in half, one of the sides slipping down into the murky depths of the blackened water below; vehicles slide across the apsault into the water as their passengers scramble to safety, being escorted by other heroes to the other side of the bridge that is still intact. Yellow, inflatable lifesaver boats bob against the black water below, either to catch anyone who falls or look for bodies.
The villain has already begun his attack, Keigo realizes. He doesn’t see the guy now, but he knows he’ll have to put everything into stopping him if he’s this powerful and deranged with his quirk. He cannot be Keigo tonight. He has to be Hawks.
But before he springs any further into action, he quickly flies over to the rocks several feet away from the bridge onto the river’s shore. The only things here are the waves, the rain, and him. His hands shake as he dials your number, tiny, wavering breaths leaving his lips. He doesn’t know why he feels so small and so scared right now, but something about this mission and leaving things with you the way they are don’t sit right with him.
So he calls you. When you don’t pick up, he expects it, but even so, he wants to hear your voice before he goes into this fight. But at least you’ll be able to hear his. When the beep signals the beginning of his voicemail, he doesn’t have time to think of what to say. He just says it.
“Hey, it’s me,” he sighs. “Hero's Commission called. They need me down at the bridge in case a villain attacks tonight. Supposedly, he’s been making trouble for over a month now and we’ve been trying to track him.”
He trails off, his brain trying to think of what else to tell you. Anything he’s sure he’d regret not saying sooner if he happens to kick the bucket tonight. “I’ll be home as soon as I can, but if for some reason that doesn’t happen, just know that I’m so sorry I’m so fucked up.” He presses a fist to his pounding head, gritting his teeth in frustration. “I just don’t tell you about it, about me, because I don’t want you to worry and…”
He pauses, gnawing at his bottom lip. The words push at his throat, threatening to rip from his chest.
“Dammit, because I love you,” he declares, strained and his heart pounding as fast as a hummingbird’s wings. “I’m so, so in love with you, and I’m so afraid that if I’m to ever tell you why I am the way that I am, you’ll never love me or want me in the same way. I…”
He trails off, a sob leaving his mouth. He covers it at first, afraid someone might hear, but no one is around. No one but him. “I’m so scared you’ll leave,” he confesses, his voice wavering. “But I just keep pushing you away from me,” he says, his voice trembling. “I keep fucking this up for myself.”
The dam behind his eyes breaks and he begins to softly sob to himself, keeping himself as quiet as he can so he doesn’t scare you. How lame to be crying to your girlfriend in a voicemail.
But as quickly as it came, it vanishes and he pulls himself together. He clears his throat and takes his goggles off to wipe at his eyes. “This voicemail didn’t go the way I wanted it to,” he chuckles dryly. “Just know that this is how I feel about you and I promise I’ll be home.”
Without another word, he ends the voicemail and stares out at the bridge. The sound of terrified and panicked screams echoes in the wind. Sounds of chaos.
Keigo balls his hands into tight fists at his sides and pockets his phone. But not before turning it off entirely.
*************
“Just take a deep breath, honey,” your friend soothes you over the phone. “Everything’s gonna be okay.”
“But what if it’s not?” you pitifully sob into the phone. “He’s out there right now, I have no idea where he is, and the last thing on his mind conscious is us fighting!”
You’re sitting on the couch now in Keigo’s penthouse, still in his shirt. His coffee table is littered with a half-empty glass of wine, his opened bottle of Merlot that you started guzzling down, and bits of weed from the clumsy blunt you rolled for yourself to soothe your nerves.
None of that helped you, so now you’re here, about to tear your hair out. When Keigo had left, you ventured out of the guest room to rummage through his wine and his weed since both aren’t hands-off for you. “Anything that’s mine is yours, baby bird,” he had told you a year ago when you had spent the night and forgot your toothbrush. He shared his with you with no problem.
That was the first time you had spent the night with him after a magical date and some even more magical sex. You had fallen hard, and him even harder, since the first day he saw you, in fact.
You had been walking to work, looking so pretty in your pink blouse and your work slacks with an ass that could stop traffic. It had stopped Keigo dead in his tracks. He was doing day patrols and had caught sight of you, causing him to lose track of his conversation with a police officer about the possibility of new villains.
He didn’t catch up with you and spit game immediately as he usually did with women he was interested in. First, he flew alongside you at a distance you couldn’t see him to make sure you got to work safely. Then, after realizing you worked as an interior designer, he had pretended he was in need of renovating his agency.
“I just need a little bit of color, y’know?” he said as he sat in your office, loving your smell and your eyes. “Like this pretty pink you’ve got on.” He eyed your blouse, smirking at the way you froze when you realized he was flirting.
You had never been flirted with so openly before like that, especially by a pro. And especially by someone as sexy and as charming as Hawks. His boldness and confidence turned you on and you found yourself wanting more of him. When he asked for your card (for business purposes), you had agreed. The renovations for his agency never happened, but a date did.
That was all just a year ago. Now here you are now, all stress and uncertainty and marijuana smoke in your lungs. “I should’ve never brought any of it up,” you lament. “I feel like a fucking asshole.”
“Sweetie, you’ve been with the guy for a whole year!” your friend argues. “If he hasn’t opened up to you by now and shown you the him he is without the cameras in his face and his hero facade on, then he isn’t the one for you.”
You know she’s right, but the idea of leaving Keigo pains you beyond words. You have too much invested into him to just leave when things get tough. You knew what you were getting into the moment you decided to embark on the journey of a romantic relationship with him since he happens to be a hero.
You told him and yourself you were fine with the late nights where he’d be MIA and the missed calls. The constant wondering and worrying. The sneaking around and being discreet about your relationship for the sake of his status.
All you want in return is some closeness. Some vulnerability. Something to make you feel like you’re wanted and cherished the way you want and cherish him. But he’s never given you any. You sometimes question if you’re asking for too much from him, knowing how hard his job is and how stressed he can be.
But even so, the yearning to know his secrets still pushes at you every time he brushes off a new scar or tells you vague events of his past that end in him not wanting to talk about it anymore. And though you respect him enough to leave it alone, you know you need more.
“Has he even told you he loves you?” your friend asks, bringing you back down to earth.
You flush at her words. “We haven’t gotten there yet,” you reply, almost embarrassed by the fact. “I’ve been holding back telling him because I know his job is hard and…”
‘And I don’t wanna scare him,’ you think. You know this is the longest relationship Keigo has had. You as well since your past relationships had never gone past a couple months or sex. But with Keigo, it’s different. You feel safe with him. You can be wholeheartedly and undoubtedly yourself. You love him, but you keep it inside. All to keep him comfortable.
“Now what if I don’t get the chance to tell him at all?” you ask, quickly beginning to cry again. Every word left unspoken begins to bubble at your throat, coming out in anguished sobs.
“Okay, stop,” you friend firmly says. “First off, put down any alcohol or smoke ‘cause it’s making you paranoid.” You eye the wine and the weed littering the coffee table.
“Second, Keigo is going to come home to you. He just went out for a breather and he’ll be back. Plus, he’s a smart guy and he’s a pro! He knows how to get himself out of any kind of situation.” You listen to your friends word, taking deep breaths to calm yourself. “I guess you’re right,” you weakly say.
“I am right,” she states with conviction. “Just rest for now and when he comes home, give him time to decompress. Then tomorrow, you can apologize and talk about what happened. Simple, right?”
You nod, but even as you try to persuade yourself that your friend’s words are true, you still feel that twist in your gut at the idea of tomorrow. What if he isn’t here tomorrow? What if you pushed him so hard that he left? Or what if something worse has happened?
“Just sleep, honey.” Your friend’s words drift to your ear again like a prayer; beacons in the void of darkness. “Everything is going to be okay.”
Though you don’t really believe her, you do as she says anyway. After she hangs up, you clean up the living room and venture back to your guest room to sleep off your frustrations. The effects of the wine and the blunt combined with the aftermath of crying hit you immediately, making it easy to drift off to sleep.
You sleep for over three hours until you awaken in the darkness of the guest room. Groggily, you look at the clock: 2:04 AM. Immediately, you reach for your phone which you put on ‘do not disturb’. There, on the screen, are one missed call and one voicemail from Keigo.
Your heart skips a beat and the fogginess of sleep leaves your head as fight the urge to ignore it. This could be important. You click on the message and put it on speaker, placing your phone flat on the bed. You bring your knees to your chest and hug yourself, tucking your nose into Keigo’s shirt collar and breathing in his cologne.
The beginning of the message is disoriented and loud, the sound of the wind cutting through before you hear Keigo’s beautiful, wonderful voice. As soon as you hear him, you’re calm.
“Hey, it’s me. Hero's Commission called. They need me down at the bridge in case a villain attacks tonight. Supposedly, he’s been making trouble for over a month now and we’ve been trying to track him.”
Your heart drops into your stomach. A villain attack. Of course! That’s why he isn’t home yet. “Oh, my God,” you fearfully whisper, covering your mouth.
“I’ll be home as soon as I can, but if for some reason that doesn’t happen, just know that I’m so sorry I’m so fucked up. I just don’t tell you about it because I don’t want you to worry and…”
He trails off and you swear, your soul leaves your body as you anticipate his next words. But nothing could’ve ever prepared you for them. As soon as you hear those three little words that mean so much to so many, your breath hitches and you come back to life, feeling like you’ve been dead all night:
“Dammit, because I love you. I’m so, so in love with you, and I’m so afraid that if I’m to ever tell you why I am the way that I am, you’ll never love me or want me in the same way. I…I’m so scared you’ll leave.”
His voice begins to tremble and waiver, hitching as he begins to cry. You’ve never heard him cry before. Your heart aches for him, your body desperate to be against his.
“But I just keep pushing you away from me. I keep fucking this up for myself.”
“No,” you whisper, beginning to cry yourself. The fact that he’s felt this way for so long, suffering in silence, is a reality that is worse than anything you could’ve imagined.
Finally, he clears his throat and you know that the end of the voicemail is near. “This voicemail didn’t go the way I wanted it to. Just know that this is how I feel about you and I promise I’ll be home.”
When the voicemail ends, you sit there in silence, the newfound information processing in your brain. All you can think about is one thing that you still cannot believe is a fact as true as day: ’He loves me. He really loves me.’
Suddenly, everything makes sense and the world is clearer to you. All the uncertainty and doom you felt have vanished, replaced with a fluttering in your heart that belongs only to Keigo. Delirious with need, you jump out of bed and immediately go to his bedroom to search for his sweatpants and a hoodie. ‘I have to go find him. I need to see him.’
You don’t know where he is or where he could be calling from, but if there is a villain attack then social media will have the first place to search. As you venture into Keigo’s master bedroom to search for clothes, preparing to fight the rain and the city’s chaos to find him, a sound stops you.
It is the sound of the click of the lock to the balcony doors. Then the sound of the doors as they slide back.
“Hawks,” you immediately whisper to yourself. Then, louder, “Hawks!”, as you immediately race out of the bedroom to the living room just in time to see him walking through the doors after landing on the terrace.
“Keigo!” you gasp, every emotion hitting you at once watching him in the dark living room. The only light is from the big, silver moon illuminating Keigo while the rest of him is shrouded in darkness.
“Hey,” he tiredly greets you as he shuts the door behind him. You feel like God as blessed you bringing him home in one piece. Now, you can really tear into his ass. “God, why didn’t you call and tell me you’d be back?” you snap, not daring to let him rest for a second. “I’ve been worried sick about you! I was gonna…”
Your words die in your throat when the overhead light that automatically switches on according to body movement flicks on, coating the room in a golden glow that shines right on Keigo and the fresh bruises and scratches he’s sporting. He doesn’t look that bad, but you can tell his right eye socket is swelling and his wings look ragged and worn “Keigo,” you softly gasp, the word almost getting caught in your throat. That’s all you can begin to say.
“You listen to my voicemail?” he asks curiously, but not rudely. You nod slowly, mouth still open in awe. “A villain destroyed the bridge and nearly had every vehicle on there goin’ into the river. He has the ability to extend his limbs, so he made a couple of other extended arms and legs to go along with ‘em.” He huffs in annoyance. “Motherfucker looked like Doc Ock from Spiderman.”
“Is everyone okay?” you softly ask.
“After a couple of my coworkers and I got to the guy, yeah,” Keigo replies, kicking off his boots. He places his goggles on a nearby table. “First, I had to fetch as many bodies as I could that the fucker kept flingin’ over the bridge to taunt me. Gang Orca and Eraserhead took care of the rest of the civilians once I caught up to the villain. Then it was just us vs. him. Once Eraserhead got near him, he took the fucker's quirk and the cops put him in handcuffs.”
“That’s good,” you reply, relief filling you. Mostly at the fact that he’s still here, alive and breathing. Silence falls between you, tense and filled with unspoken words. You nervously wriggle your fingers, feeling small under Keigo’s unwavering gaze. “Listen, Kei,” you nervously begin. “I’ve been goin’ crazy in here ever since you left and I’m so, so sorry for–“
Keigo suddenly puts up a hand to silence you. Your words abruptly cut off and you button your lip, your heart pounding in your chest. You wonder if he can hear how loud it is because you sure can. It is pumping wildly in your ears, making you even more of a nervous wreck.
“Since you got my voicemail, you probably already know a lot of what I’m about to say, but I’m goin’ to tell you properly because you deserve it.” He takes a deep breath, preparing himself. You stay silent and patient, waiting for him to come to grips with whatever he is fighting. “I suppose I should be grateful that eight-armed dickhead decided to cause commotion tonight,” he dryly chuckles. “I had went out to clear my head; to distract myself. What better way to do all that than to kick some ass and save some lives?”
He unzips his jacket and lets it fall to the floor, revealing his shirt and toned arms underneath. “But while I was doin’ all of that, other than thinking about stopping that villain and saving the innocent lives of all of those people, all I could think about tonight was you.”
His gaze soften as he looks at you. Your heart pumps a bit faster.
“I thought to myself, ‘when I finally put this motherfucker behind bars, when my mission is finally done, I’m going home’.”
He steps toward you, eyes still locked with yours, never wavering. It makes you tremble in your position. “‘And as soon as I get home, I’m falling to my knees, begging for forgiveness, and showing my baby all of me and more because she fucking deserves it’.”
He takes another two steps toward you before suddenly dropping to his knees in front of you. “So this is me doin’ all of that now. Plus, showing you how much I love you.”
He leans toward you and wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you closer to him so his face is pressed into your stomach. You stare down at him in awe, unable to speak. You’re afraid that if you do, the moment will disappear and so will he.
“I never said I before,” Keigo continues, “because I was afraid it wasn’t the right time or I’d end up fucking everything up for myself. Plus, loving someone always seems to backfire on me.” He strokes up your thigh, holding onto your hip. “So I kept it in, just like everything I haven’t told you yet.”
His hands, so careful yet so strong, trail up your hips and ball into his shirt, gripping the fabric. When his hands and shoulders begin to tremble, you realize he’s crying. You’ve never seen him cry before. It is a sight you never want to see again.
“I’m a mess, Y/N,” he tearfully says. “When we met for the first time, I never wanted you to see any of that. I didn’t even want this to turn into what it is now, but I’m so, so grateful it hasn’t.” He looks up at you, eyes red and wet with tears. “I’m so happy you didn’t leave.”
Your heart wrenches at the sight of your boyfriend–so sad and so broken. How is a person as bright-eyed and confident as Hawks also someone like this? He must have hid all of this from you for some time. You wrap your arms around his neck, cupping the back of his head in one of your hands. “Keigo, I’d never leave you.” Your fingers caress his blonde curls, stroking his head softly. “I promise.”
“You can’t promise me that,” he croaks, shaking his head. “How do you know you won’t get tired of me? How do you know I won’t scare you off?”
“Keigo, you’re scaring me now,” you confess, feeling your own fresh set of tears beginning to make an appearance. “I’m scared we won’t make it because you refuse to open up to me.”
Keigo’s expression changes to one of confusion, his eyes narrowing as he scowls at you. “So you’re telling me that if I tell you all about my childhood, you promise you won’t leave?” he asks, a bite in his voice. “If I tell you about the abuse, the trauma, the shit I witnessed from my own parents, being stripped of my name when the Hero’s Commission picked me up, learning that the same man who saved me and inspired me to become a hero is a fuckin’ abuser, you’d stay?”
You stare down at him, dumbfounded and horrified. You never knew any of this, though you did know the part about Endeavor since it was all over the news. But that other stuff? Keigo kept entirely to himself, leaving you in the dark.
“What about the scars?” He moves away from you slightly to strip himself of his shirt, revealing a very impressive, toned upper body and a slew of scars–some new and some healed. “All the training I forced to undergo by the Hero Commission. Some that have barely healed from nearly dying during missions. This burn here that I got tryna save a fuckin’ villain.”
He points at the burn on his jaw and your stomach lurches. “Twice?” you ask, your eyes wide. “You tried to save Twice?” You know a little bit about this event, mostly because it was publicized everywhere and Keigo was forced to tell you some of what happened after he had nightmares. But now that a year has gone by and most of the LOV have been arrested, it has become old news. People have moved on.
But Keigo obviously hasn’t. He visibly cringes at the sound of Twice’s name, the trauma still fresh. “And what about him?” He demands, his voice cracking. “What about the fact that I fucking killed him?”
“Keigo, he was a villain,” you firmly respond, taking his hands into yours. “You gave me a chance. He didn’t take it.”
But this isn’t enough to calm Keigo down. He crumbles again, his lips trembling and eyes welling with tears. You instantly wrap your arms around him and hold him, cradling his head. “I feel like a fucking monster, Y/N,” he sobs into your stomach, gripping you for dear life. “I feel like I’m drowning and I’m gonna pull you right in with me. I don’t want that. I just wanna make you happy…”
His fingers slide under your shirt to expose your stomach and he presses his face there, wetting your skin with tears. “Can you really love a monster like me?” he whispers against your skin.
He begins to cry again, his body wracked with sobs and soft whines that tear at your soul. A lone tear drips down your face as you continue to cradle your boyfriend like he’s a child. And right now he is–he’s the exact neglected, abused, broken child he alluded to minutes before. You picture him as a little boy, roaming the streets of his home, doing anything and everything to survive because no one cared enough to care for him. You’ll make sure that never happens again. You swear it.
Gently pushing him away from your stomach, you take his hands into yours and join him on the floor. He stares at you in awe, eyes red and face wet. “I have two answers for you,” you gently coo, smoothening his hair back. “To answer your first question is yes, I promise I’ll stay as long as you show me everything.”
You cup his jaw and caress the burn scar. His eyes flutter closed at your touch, tears sparkling on his blonde lashes. “I want it all, Keigo: the scars; the bruises; the wounds. Tell me every secret you have; every dream and aspiration; every fear that keeps you up at night.”
You lean in to kiss the burn then his bruised eye. “Let me take all of it, especially your pain.” You continue to kiss his face before trailing down to his neck and shoulders; his arms and collarbone; his chest and pert nipples. You kiss every bruise, scar, and burn you find, your fingers trailing over them. You treasure every soft moan and gasp he lets out, happy to have them over sobs and whines of anguish.
“I don’t wanna fix you–I just wanna water you; nurture you; watch you grow the way you’ve done me.” You look at him then, cupping his face in your hands. “I just wanna love you the way you deserve to be loved.”
His eyes widen an inch at your confession. “Yes, I love you, Keigo,” you softly giggle. “That’s my answer to your second answer: yes, I can love a monster. But you’re not a monster, Keigo. You’re just a human, even with these big ass wings.”
You gently tickle a wing with your fingers, making him laugh under his breath. “You’re an intelligent, strong, beautiful man who deserves every inch of my love,” you whisper to him as you lean toward him, nuzzling your face into his neck. You breathe in his scent of sweat and cologne, committing it to memory.
Keigo holds you to him, cradling your head to his neck. His hold on you is fierce and passionate, validating his feelings for you even before he utters them. “I really love you, you know that?” he whispers against your ear. Your heart jumps and a joyful grin stretches across your face. You look up at him, tracing every single feature of his pretty face with your eyes. “I do now,” you softly reply.
He smiles at this, the act finally reaching his beautiful eyes. You trail your thumb over his bottom lip, your stomach curling at the plumpness of it. “Wanna smoke?” you ask, raising a playful eyebrow.
At the mention of rolling up, Keigo’s wings ruffle excitedly and you giggle. “I thought you’d never ask,” he sighs, sounding like he needs it. With no hesitation, you help him to his feet and proceed to set up. You ask him to roll the blunt which he does, his fingers and tongue working expertly to tighten the blunt in a way you can’t. But then again, Keigo has always been good with his hands and mouth.
After he finishes, you begin to pass the blunt back and forth between each other as you play your music from your phone, the sound of SZA filling the living room. Soon, you’re feeling light as a feather and high as a kite. Your body and mind are relaxed, especially feeling the solid chest of your man underneath you as you lie against him.
The blunt lays on the ashtray on the coffee table now, smaller now after use. You reach for it and pinch it between your index and thumb before taking a puff, the end of the blunt turning red like an angry firefly. As soon as the smoke hits your lungs, you’re falling deeper into that sea of bliss. You look up at Keigo, finding his eyes fluttered closed. At first you think he's sleep, but his arm circling around your waist tells you different. “Feelin’ good, Kei, baby?” you coo to him, your eyes flickering between his eyes and his lips. You desperately want to kiss them.
“Mmm,” he hummed, a content smile on his pretty face. The sight makes you giggle. You start to laugh even more when he suddenly circles his other arm around you and pulls you into his lap. “Don’t want you to leave,” he mutters to you as he grips your waist, firmly holding you to him.
You wrap your arms around his neck, kissing his forehead. “You have me,” you whisper to him. He looks up at you, eyes slightly red and glinting with adoration for you. “And you have me,” he replies, soft conviction in his voice.
“Promise?” you utter hopefully. He slowly nods, staring at you the same way you do him: intensely; adoringly. Your fingers trail up his chest, his heart pounding underneath your fingertips. ‘He’s real,’ you think. ‘And all mine. And I need him.’
The want and need for Keigo and his body dawns on you quickly, quickly taking its toll on you. Your nipples harden and your thighs squeeze together as you begin to strip him out of his clothes with your eyes. “Prove it then,” you demand, need crawling into your voice. “Prove how much you love me. Prove to me that things will be different.”
Realization alights behind Keigo’s eyes and his expression darkens slightly. It excites you. He coaxes you off of his lap before standing to meet you. “Come here,” he coos, already taking your hand in his. “Let’s get cleaned up.” You nod, excitement and anticipation filling your core with warmth as he leads you up the steps and straight down the hallway to his master bedroom.
Keigo has over four bathrooms in his penthouse: in his bedroom, guest room, down the hall, and living room where his washer and dryer sit closest to the kitchen. The bathroom in his bedroom is by far the most beautiful, complete with marbled sink counters, a whirlpool tub, and a walk-in shower with a sliding glass door and one of those shower heads that make the water look like a rainforest waterfall.
You watch, trembling in anticipation as Keigo gets the shower ready. He makes sure it’s at the right temperature to warm you up but not burn you before turning to face you, lust in his eyes. He then begins to undress himself, taking everything off until his hero gear is on the floor and he’s standing before you, completely bare.
You’re silent, unable to speak. You’re too tongue-tied at the sight of your man’s body displayed before you like an all-you-can-eat buffet. Keigo is not extremely buff, but he still has some impressive muscles, including well-defined abs and a V-line that trails down to his tufts of darker blonde curls that you desperately want to venture towards. His gorgeous, muscled body is unfortunately scarred as well, fresh bruises and cuts coating his skin from the mission he just completely tonight. In addition, he still has scars from where Dabi burned him a year ago, the skin tight and pruned. You feel tears prick your eyes, realizing that it’s quite possible that you would’ve never seen his gorgeous body again.
You close the gap between you and lay your hands flat on his chest. With your eyes locked with his, you begin to kiss every single old scar and bruise that adorns his soft, tanned skin. You’re careful with those that look fresh, making sure to skip those and focus on the ones that have been on Keigo’s body for months if not years.
As you do, you find pleasure in the tiny sighs and groans that leave his lips, knowing he’s enjoying this TLC. It makes you feel good to know you’re making him feel good. You want him to know you enjoy every single part of him, no matter if he’s scarred or not. You think he’s beautiful.
Finally, he pulls you away and gives you an excitably, darkened stare. You know what he wants now. Quickly, you go to strip yourself of his shirt, but he stops you. “Let me,” he gently orders, and you let your arms go limp at your sides. He presses his lips to yours and pulls you into a passionate, wet kiss as his hands slide up under his shirt.
You softly moan into his mouth as you feel his hand on your bare skin. “You look so fuckin’ good in my clothes,” he whispers against your lips. “Even when you’re pissed at me, you still wear my shit.”
He brings the shirt up more, exposing your panties, stomach, and bare breasts to him. He groans as he pulls the shirt up over your head and flings it across the bathroom before ducking down to play with your tits. He latches one of the hardened peaks of your nipples into his mouth, swirling his tongue around and around.
You moan a little louder, your hands grasping his shoulders. “Missed you,” you softly utter, biting back another moan as his tongue teases your hardened nipple. He peers up at you, smiling. “I missed you too, baby,” he whispers. “So much.” He presses his lips to your other breast, his fingers sliding down your sides. “M’so sorry for everything. I never should’ve pushed you away. I–“
“Hush,” you say, pressing a hand to his cheek. He looks up at you, regret in his eyes. “Show me how sorry you are now.” He doesn’t need to be told twice. Immediately, he stands and takes your hand to walk you into the steaming-hot shower. As soon as you are under the jets of hot water, Keigo pushes you against the tiled wall and presses a passionate kiss to your lips.
You moan softly against his lips, wrapping your arms around him to bring him closer to you; as close as he can possibly be. He puts one hand above your head against the wall as he begins to grind his hips into yours, his pelvis pressing delightfully up against your clit. You whimper into his neck as he continues to move against you, his lips caressing your neck and that spot behind your ear that makes your pussy wet and your nipples tingle.
“You’re so fucking pretty,” he coos. “So beautiful…so sexy…and you’re so mine.”
The feeling is too much. It overpowers you, making you delirious with need. “I’m all yours,” you practically sob. “Please, Kei; don’t tease me.”
Keigo moves his head away from your neck to smirk at you. “And so impatient,” he chuckles. His hand sneaks between your thighs where he presses his index and middle fingers between your pussy lips. You gasp at the sensation of his touch, your clit jumping against his palm. “Naughty girl. You’re already wet for me,” he groans. “I suppose you’ve been waitin’ long enough though. Time to show you how sorry I am.”
After sucking on his fingers, he proceeds to get onto his knees and press his lips against your inner thigh before showering your pussy in kisses that quickly turn into open-mouthed sucks and licks that have you seeing stars. Your hands grab his shoulders, gripping them tightly as his tongue licks every bit of your pussy up, his lips pillowy-soft against your clit. “Fuck, Keigo,” you moan, leaning your head back against the shower wall. “You’re so good at this.”
Keigo moans into your pussy in response, lashing his tongue in different shapes across your clit. When he suddenly hooks your leg over his shoulder, you squeak in surprise. He looks up at you, eyes shining and a love-drunk look on his face. “I’ve got you, baby,” he coos, staring up at you lovingly. “You know I do, don’t you?”
Then he’s diving back in, one hand gripping your thigh hiked up to his ear and the other holding you steady by your hip. You’re losing your shit, one hand in his hair and the other gripping his shoulder for dear life. “Shit, Kei!” you cry out, your cries of ecstasy echoing off the shower walls. “Fuck, baby, that feels so…oh, my God!”
Meanwhile, Keigo won’t shut the fuck up about how amazing and pretty your pussy is. “You have the prettiest fuckin’ pussy, baby,” he coos into your clit, his words slightly muffled. “You’re always so open n’ wet for me. How could I ever neglect this cunt?”
His words ignite something in you that have you crumbling, all self-control abandoned. The porn-worthy sounds slipping from your lips are drowned out from the sound of the shower as Keigo continues to go waaaaay down south, never letting up. It doesn't take long for that knot in your core to begin to tighten, signaling your oncoming orgasm. “I’m close!” you whimper. “So close! Don’t stop!”
“Mmm-hmm,” Keigo mumbles into your pussy, still flicking that magical tongue. But when he inserts a finger and curls it up against your G-spot, you just about see God. “Go ahead and cum for me, baby,” he practically begs you, his finger encouraging you further. “Cum for me. Cum all over my face.”
Your eyes close, plummeting you into darkness as your peak begins to dawn closer and closer the faster Keigo’s finger fucks you. “Please, baby,” he pleads. “I need you. Need all of you.” He dives back into your pussy, sucking on your clit softly in time with his finger stroking your insides and your G-spot.
Finally, finally, you fall off that hill and cum all over your man’s face as requested. Keigo moans and whines in appreciation as you scream his name, nearly losing your voice. He grips your hips with such force that you can’t move as he licks you clean, his tongue carefully licking over and around your sensitive pussy. When he finally pulls away, his hair is wet and his face gleams with your cum.
You help him up and clean his face off, running your thumbs over his plump lips. “That was amazing,” you breathlessly giggle. Keigo smiles proudly at you, happy with the praise. “I try.”
You press a passionate kiss to his mouth, rendering him speechless afterwards. “Now, it’s your turn.” A newfound boldness courses through your veins as you press down onto his shoulders, forcing him to sit down on the bench. “You sure, baby bird?” he asks, raising an eyebrow. “You don’t have to–“
“Nah,” you interrupt him firmly. “I’m gettin’ that dick down my throat and you’re gonna enjoy every single second of it.” You settle down onto your knees in between his thighs, your hands trailing up his legs. “My amazing, intelligent hero deserves it.”
Keeping your eyes locked with his, your nails gently graze up and down his thighs, earning a shiver and a delicious moan that escapes his luscious mouth. His cock quickly hardens even more between his legs, dripping with pre-cum all for you. Without wasting anymore time, you wrap your hand around the base of his length and begin to light peppering his dick in kisses, playing close attention to the sensitive spot at the underside of his cock.
“Fuck,” he whispers, eyes fluttering closed. You stare up at him, his dickhead in your face, near your lips. “You deserve all of this, honey,” you coo before you wrap your lips around his cock. You take your time with sucking him off, starting by sucking on the pink dickhead as you slowly pump your hand up and down, spitting onto his dick if necessary.
By the time you take him deeper into your mouth, Keigo’s dick is nice and slick with water and your spit, allowing him to easily slip into your mouth. You continue to pump him up and down, stroking the rest of the length that you can’t fit in your mouth. You swirl your tongue around his head and along his dick, loving how warm his skin is, his masculine scent, and the taste of salt on your tastebuds. You commit all of it to memory, including his beauty face etched in pleasure.
You take a bit more of him, your mouth stretching around his thick cock, but you don’t do it enough to hit the back of your throat. Not yet. Keigo is in his world. His blonde brows are knitted together in concentration while his chest heaves up and down. His hand immediately goes to your hair as he watches you bob your head up and down on his cock. “Just like that,” he hisses. “Such a good girl. So good for me.”
His hand travels to the back of your head and gently pushes you down, causing his dick to slip farther into your mouth. You feel him hit the back of your throat finally, causing you to gag and your eyes to water. He keeps his hand on your head as you begin to gag on his cock, your throat pumping up and down, back and forth.
Despite the year you’ve been with him, you still can’t believe how big he is. He practically fills your throat, stretching out the wet, inner walls until your jaw aches and your eyes begin to tear. But you do it for him and those lovely sounds dripping from his lips. “Fuck, baby bird!” He groans through gritted teeth. “So good! Such a good little slut for me!” His toes curl beside your naked thighs, his hand in your hair and gripping it tightly.
You continue to give him the Glock Glock 3000, taking extra care to fondle his balls with your other hand. He loves that. He’s a whimpering, whining mess as you continue your work, working him so good that he’s seeing stars. You want to show him you can take everything.
Finally, he growls deep in his throat and wrenches your head away from his dick. “Enough,” he firmly says. You gasp as you pop off of his dick, a string of saliva following him in his wake as he pulls his dick out of your mouth that droops from your bottom lip.
You softly pant, catching your breath but also to calm yourself down. You’re becoming hornier by the second. Your pussy is wet and wanting, desperate to be filled, leaving you to rub your thighs together to give yourself some relief. Keigo’s eyes are blown with lust, filling you with excitement and a slight twinge of fear. “Get up,” he demands.
You oblige and stand on shaky legs. You fortunately don’t have to move on your own. Keigo does the work for you. In an instant, he is behind you with his hands on your hips, forcing you to bend forward. With a squeak, your hands fly to the shower wall and your back arches, presenting your ass and dripping cunt to your boyfriend.
“So fuckin’ pretty,” he growls, giving your ass a sharp smack that echoes off the shower walls. “Yeah, you like this, don’t you?” He hisses, spanking you again. “Nobody could ever make you feel like this, could they?”
You whimper, the stinging of his spanks making your pussy tingle. He spanks you again, harder this time, and you yelp. “I didn’t hear that, gorgeous,” he snickers. “Louder for me.” You whimper when you suddenly feel his cock slide against your pussy, nudging your sensitive clit.
“Yes!” you wail out. “No one makes me feel like you do, daddy!” You turn to look at him, arching your pretty ass further into him and whining your hips around for him. “Please, please fuck me, Kei. I can’t take much more!” Keigo watches your hips and ass, slowing growing more and more needy by the second.
“Fuck!” The word leaves his lips in a hiss. He instantly grabs your hips, lines his dick up, and sinks inside of you. Finally home. A gasp falls from your open mouth as he sinks in deeper, stretching you out. No matter how many times you do this with him, you’ll always feel full with him.
Keigo holds your hips and slowly begins to roll his hips into you, sending your clit into hyperdrive with pleasure. You’re a mess at this point, grinding your ass back into him despite his slow pace. “Keigo,” you whine in need.
Keigo chuckles, still rolling his hips, his dick pumping in and out of you slowly. “Patience, baby. I wanna make it last.” He suddenly lets go of your hips and grabs your tits, squeezing them in his palms and emitting gasps from you.
“You’re mine, you understand?” He growls into your ear. “You’re. Fuckin’. Mine.” Each word is punctuated by sudden, rough trusts that make your eyes blow and your mouth fall open in a wordless, pleasured O. Now Keigo begins to go faster, snapping his hips forward as the water continues to fall around you in sheets. The only sounds are of the water hitting the shower floor, skin slapping against wet skin, and your breathless moans and gasps of pleasure as Keigo continues to pummel your cunt. You go to rub your clit as he does, but he shoos it away and does it for you, rubbing the bud in time with his relentless thrusts. “No, no, no, baby,” he coos into your ear. “I told you you're mine. Which means this is my pussy too.”
His other hand suddenly moves to your leg and lifts it up, just enough for you to feel his cock sink deeper into your walls. “Oh, my God!” you holler, your head falling back in pure ecstasy as Keigo continues to fuck you silly with your leg up and his hand on your clit. “Shit, Kei, I’m gonna cum soon!”
You can feel your orgasm quickly building, that knot in your core about to snap. Keigo moves his body closer to yours and pushes it against the wall, causing your tits to squish erotically against the wet shower door. “Do it, baby,” he growls into your ear, his breath fanning over your face. “Cum for me. Cum all over this dick. Your dick.”
His words send you over the edge. You tumble down that hill hard and fall into a sea of bliss as your second orgasm washes over you. All you can say is his name and God’s name in vain as you cum all over his cock that has begun to replace its fast pumps with slow strokes, Keigo’s hips doing wonders behind you.
Keigo holds you to him as you continue to cum, breathlessly moaning into your ear. “You’re so good for me, baby,” he whispers, peppering the side of your face in kisses. “So tight…gonna make me cum soon too…”
“Do it,” you beg him. “Please cum for me. Cum inside me, daddy.”
You’re delirious with need for him, all logic going out the window. You and Keigo have always been careful, leading to him usually pulling out before cumming even though you’re on the pill. But after tonight, you want to feel all of him.
“No.” Keigo’s voice is firm and deep, almost a monstrous growl. It renders you speechless as he suddenly slips out of you and places your leg down. Before you can process what’s happening, he twirls you around and scoops you up into his arms.
You squeak in surprise at the sudden action, but say nothing as he slides the bathroom door open and exits the shower, causing the water to cut off. He is swift and quick as he makes the trip from his bathroom to his master bedroom. He wastes no time tossing you onto the bed. You gasp as you bounce slightly against the mattress, still wet and naked from the shower.
When you finally settle onto your back, you stare up at him in confusion. “What are you doing?” you ask, a little giggle leaving your lips. But you stop when you get a good look at him.
In the dim light of the moon that shines through the window, Keigo looks less than human: his eyes are a dark gold and glowing brightly as he stares down at you, his crimson-colored wings fluffier and frazzled as if someone has touched them too much and caused them to become oversensitive. Gone is the Keigo you know, replaced with a man starving for release and you.
He suddenly gets on top of you, pinning your hands over your head with one hand. “Here’s what’s gonna happen, baby girl,” he softly growls to you. “I’m gonna put your pretty ass into a mating press. Then I’m gonna fuck you deep, hard, and fast until I spray my cum all in that pretty lil’ pussy of yours. Then, when I’m done, I’m gonna pull out and spray you in the rest of it so people will know you’re mine. And you’re gonna like all of it and take all of it like my good little slut.”
He leans down so his nose is pressed against yours, his face like a full moon emerging in the sky. “Is that clear?” he gutturally asks.
Fear and arousal curl in your stomach, chasing each other around so one can be dominating your body and mind. You don’t know how you manage to speak–your mouth is so dry–but you do. A tiny “yes, daddy” leaves your lips as your pussy throbs and begs for him. “I understand,” you whisper. “Please fuck me.”
That is all Keigo needs. In a blink of an eye, your legs are thrown over his shoulder and he’s sinking his cock deep inside of you. A loud moan leaves your lips as he fills you to the brim, so deep that his balls hit your ass and his pelvis presses against your sensitive clit. You swear he’s never been so deep inside of you before. You can almost feel him in your stomach!
Keigo leans down so you’re face to face, chest to chest. “Can you feel me, baby?” he coos against your lips. “Is it too much for you? Am I fillin’ that poor pussy up too much?”
You whine in response, your hands gripping his shoulders. He wolfishly grins down at you, loving your submissive, dumb little state. “Don’t worry; you can take it. You’re a big girl, right?” He begins to rut into you, hips snapping against yours and cock pumping deep into your pussy. “Right?” he growls, purposely angling his hips to aim at your G-spot.
You’re seeing the entire galaxy now, your pussy spasming around his dick that mercilessly strokes your walls. When he begins to slow down to tease you, you open your mouth to cuss him out, but all that leaves is a high-pitched, incoherent whine. Keigo laughs right in your face, loving this shit.
‘Bastard,’ you think, the only clear thought in your dicked-down, fucked-out mind that isn’t the pleasure or the scent of your boyfriend. ‘Two can play at this game, bitch.’
You then take two of your fingers and proceed to lightly stroke Keigo’s feathers, taking extra care to touch each overly-sensitive, buttery-soft feather. It is enough to have Keigo’s eyes widening and his body tensing. You smirk up at him and his reaction, continuing to torture him. “Somethin’ wrong, daddy?” you innocently coo.
You then move your hands to the tips of his feathers and stroke them one at a time, running the tips of your fingers over each of them. Keigo lets out a high-pitched whine that has your pussy spasming and clenching around his cock. “D-don’t!” He cutely begs. “Gonna cum if you do that!”
“Then you’d better fuck me then.” You lock your legs tighter around his head and your hands grip him tighter, locking him in. “Cum inside of me,” you demand. “Cum with me.”
Keigo doesn’t need to be told twice. He snaps back into position and continues to pummel your cunt, his hips snapping forward again and again, driving his cock deeper into you. You gasp and moan beneath him, egging him on as you bounce against the mattress that shakes with the force of his thrusts. “Yes, baby!” you moan loudly, your voice bouncing off the walls. “That’s it! Keep going! I’m so close!”
You continue to stroke his wings, up and down, in circles, in aimless patterns that start to lose shape as he starts fucking you harder. His hands suddenly take your legs off his shoulder and pin your open thighs down as far as they’ll go as he settles deeper into you, practically mounting you now.
“You see it now?” he hums hotly against your mouth. “You see how much I love you? How much I need you?” You can’t answer him because he is now kissing you–hard, passionate, and rough. It has you seeing stars and barely catching your breath as he continues to fuck you into the mattress.
Finally, you begin to feel it: his cock swelling inside of you, signaling the beginning of his end. You look up at Keigo and find his eyes locked with yours, blonde locks in his face and sweat coating his body. “Gonna cum,” he warns. “Gonna fill you up, baby. Fill you with all of me. Gonna fuckin’ nut…”
You deliriously nod as your pussy spasms and your clit jumps, your third orgasm of the night present. “Me too!” you cry out. “Cum with me, Kei! Fill me up! Make me yours!”
Keigo doesn’t need you to say anything more. He swoops down to press his mouth to yours in an open-mouthed, tongue-swirling kiss, eating the sounds of your pleasure up as you finally cum all over his cock. He cums too, spilling his seed inside of you without a warning or a second though. A loud moan of your name and a whine of ecstasy leaves his lips as he cums, his hips stilling against yours.
You feel his cum stream inside of you, warm and overflowing. So much so that your mouth drops open and your eyes widen, the feeling foreign and intense. He coats your inside in all of his nut and doesn’t stop fucking you until his cum is finally dripping down your ass and onto the sheets.
Keigo pulls out of you quickly, making you whine at the sudden loss. His cum spills out of your pussy, the sight of it lewd yet so arousing. “God, that’s so hot!” he groans, pumping his dick in front of you, his shaft slick with his cum and yours. “Makes me wanna cum again.”
He suddenly scrambles on top of you and straddles your chest, his dick now in your face. “Open your fuckin’ mouth,” he growls. You do so, opening your mouth and sticking out your tongue for all of him to coat it.
Keigo cums again, tossing his head back and moaning to the ceiling, his voice echoing off the walls. His cum coats your mouth and tastebuds as well as your tits and face, causing your eyes to flutter shut to avoid getting nut in your eyes. He coats every single inch of your skin in his cum, marking you completely as his. You feel like you’re his now, and you love every inch of it.
When you finally open your eyes, your face is wet and sticky with cum as are your chest, lips, pussy, and ass. Keigo is coming down from his high, his dick growing soft and eyes dimming. When he finally comes to and gets a look at you, he grows as red as his feathers. “Fuck, look at you!” He gasps, horrified. “Don’t move. Lemme go get a towel.”
He nearly falls out of the bed trying to get up fast enough to go run to the bathroom. You lie there, covered in cum and sedated by your three orgasms of the night. And then you begin to laugh. They come up in short giggles that reach hysteria until you’re full on guffawing in Keigo’s bed.
When he finally comes back with a soft towel wet with warm water and a glass of water, he stares at you in confusion. “What?” He asks curiously.
“Nothing,” you giggle. “That was just…really nice.” You smile sweetly at him as he crawls onto the bed and proceeds to clean you up. He moves the wet towel across your sticky, sweat and cum-soaked skin until you’re finally free of it all. Then he moves to the bedside table to get the massage oil that he’s used on you and himself many times.
You smile contently as you watch him squirt the tropical-scented oil into his hands and rub them together. He takes his time and is extra careful with your legs as he moves each one into his hands, starting from your feet to your thighs to kneed the tender flesh and massage the oil into your skin.
His hands are warm and feel so nice against your body as he rubs you down, now moving to your stomach and shoulders. He then works on your arms and hands, taking each finger and gently tugging on each one. He is an expert, paying close attention to your bones and muscles on your hand. You can’t help but be aroused from it, loving the way he takes care of you.
When he finishes with the front, he turns you onto your stomach and coaxes you to lie flat on the mattress. After he gets more oil, he continues to massage your body, his knuckles pushing into your back muscles and hands kneading the globes of your ass. Your head falls onto the bed in utter pleasure and relaxation, making your muscles less tense and loose.
“Mmm,” you moan as Keigo’s fingers start to kneed into the bones of your shoulders.
“Feelin’ good, baby bird?” he hums happily.
You nod lazily and he laughs, continuing to work your body into an absolute puddle. You love this: the tenderness that comes after some good sex. All you smell are your boyfriend and the massage oil, the scents relaxing you even further and pushing you towards sleep.
When it’s finally over, Keigo scoops you off of the bed and you let him, too relaxed and exhausted to do it yourself. “Come on, gorgeous,” he coos. “Let’s get you into bed.” He coaxes you under the covers before settling in beside you. As soon as he’s in bed with you, you snuggle up against his side and he wraps his arms around you, holding you closer than close.
“Love you,” he murmurs against your forehead that he lays kisses upon. “Love you so much.”
“I love you too, Kei,” you whisper into his neck, breathing in his smell. Your hand falls to his chest and presses against his heart, feeling it beat against your palm. “I always will.”
He stares down at you, his gaze soft yet serious. “Then if you ain’t too tired, you in the mood for a very sad backstory?” He asks, a wry smirk playing at his lips.
Suddenly, all sleepiness and the fog of relaxation are gone. You sit up onto your elbow, your heart beating a bit faster. Keigo is still staring at you, dead serious and waiting for a response. You give it to him by pressing a soft kiss to his lips, cupping his face as you do. “Always,” you whisper against his lips.
Keigo smiles and presses another kiss to your lips before you lay back down beside him, mentally and emotionally preparing for his story. He doesn’t look at you as he prepares himself, mentally pulling back the pages to the book of his life that he swore not to tell you. But after tonight, that promise is broken.
“It all starts on the little island of Kyushu,” he begins softly.
THE END.
#i cry#keigo takami x black reader#hawks x black reader#black bnha#smutty smut#my fic shit#my one shots#black fanfic writer#black coded reader
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Would you ever consider writing something about red flags in polyam dating? I'm so new to the community (and dating in general) that I feel like it'd be really helpful
If you google it some results come up. I feel like I would have a very hard time because everyone is different. What might be a red flag might be a pink(?) flag for someone else. I think our society likes to conflate a single one flag with "Absolutely stay away at all costs" when it is suppose to be, "Take this into careful consideration and if there are too many red flags then it might be a good idea to stay away." But here are some of the ones that stand out to me.
Overly structured relationships, especially unbalanced ones. It is good to know what we want and polyamory allows us to structure the exact kind of relationship we want. But it also allows great flexibility in our relationships. And if that flexibility is being ignored for complete devotion to a certain structure that can be concerning. These include only dating as a couple, OPP, or coerced mono-polyam partnership. Being really strict about wanting lap-sitting polyamory or Don't Ask Don't Tell also falls under these. As well as Hierarchy vs non-Hierarchy. Maybe they have good reasons to pursue these dynamics, some of which are often very toxic, but never being open to discuss the alternative is even worse than starting off there. I find OPP awful but lots of couples start there when first opening up and quickly transition away from it.
Being too self-centered or selfish. By its nature, polyamory is more community focused than monogamous dyad dating, even if only in a closed triad. I am not saying that polyamorous people need to be selfless charities. But I think a good polyamory person has at least some ability to recognize when their own needs are legitimate met and they can put effort toward or make a sacrifice for someone else that doesn't directly benefit themselves. But a sub-set of polyamorous people can be very selfish. This is where we find the harem seekers, NRE junkies, and the cowboys/cowgirls (we seriously need a better label for that). These people want lots of partners but will manipulate their partners to not pay attention or spend time with their other partners.
Bad relationships with other partners. This one is really tricky and nuisance. Not every polyam relationships require you to meet your metamours, a DADT relationship is controversial but can sometimes work in a healthy way in extreme cases. But even if you don't meet their other partners, if they are always talking bad about them to you that can be a problem. If the other partner is calling to yell at them a lot, that is suspicious. Many couples open up their relationship, realize the initial relationship is really toxic, and want to get out while continuing other polyam relationships. I'm not saying cut those people out to leave them high and dry. But know that their will be additional baggage there. And sometimes the person you are dating is the toxic one, that their other partners are correct to not get along with them. All couples fight so don't judge this on one or two incidents. But if there are no happy moments with their other partners that is a bad sign.
I think the last one is just rushing in too fast. That one is pretty self-explanatory. People that really don't know what they want out of relationships. This kind of covers people new to polyamory too but that is not to say that polyam veterans should never date newbies, just keep in mind the extra burden it might bring. All of these naive or wishy-washy people can cause a lot of extra trouble or stress in more complicated polyamorous relationship. While this one is less of a dealbreaker than the others, it should be accounted for as it is very common.
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Fallen Hero: Sidestep 4
I find it funny that this sidestep has the same motivation and scar as Iconoclast, yet they couldn’t be more different.
Name: Clara Dubois
Gender: female she/they
Villain name: Icarus
Villainous role: hero hunter (prepare them)
Motivation: fate
Scar: suicide (third in a row? Geez)
Reason for gala: destroy the sidestep exhibit
Where is she now?: hanging out. Innocent and free.
Clara is a really fun sidestep to play. She (besides *maybe* sidestep 2 aka Daniel) is my most heroic sidestep. She believes that it’s eventual that the heroes of Los Diablos will clash with the farm and the threat that is coming. The city and its people will not suffer on account of her inaction. So she fights the heroes, never kills, helps civilians, donates to charity (what need does she have for that much money), and even robs from villains to have a flush fund if ever she needs it.
She has a pretty good relationship with everyone, except maybe Argent and Mortum, and has a huge crush on Julia Ortega while also dating Herald. She told Julia though.. with a kiss as well as words. A conversation that Clara, Herald, and Ortega are going to need to have.
Despite love being in the air Clara is not doing hot. She has issues she isn’t properly working through and believes it’s probably her fate to die during this “war”. She doesn’t believe she is a good person and worries about hurting the ones she loves.. more than she already has. She hurt Mortum when admitting the truth. She is afraid of hurting Ortega and Herald both physically in a fight (again) and emotionally for having feelings for both of them. I’m actually worried for her; her scar keeps getting worse and her motivation is dropping little by little. We’ll have to see what happens.
Man, another downer. How about some fun facts?:
Clara speaks several languages and actually enjoys learning new ones and keeping up with the ones she already knows.
There is only one language she tried to learn and dropped. Vietnamese. All those tenses and slight changes in tone meaning a thousand things drove her mad. She won’t touch it again.
Loves Vietnamese food though.
Learned how to cook after her second escape. Ortega may not believe her though.. Clara did almost burn her apartment down last time so.
Loves the color red, and will try to always wear something red.
Teases a lot. And is actually funny. She tries to never be straight up mean with it.
Used to play a lot of poker for actual money. She’s good and not just because of her telepathy.
She has used her telepathy to cheat though and was banned from playing with the other rangers. She took is as good fun and laughed when they realized.
Now the end with stats, armor stuff, and appearance:
Clara prefers anonymity at around 55%, she *can* be a know it all or it’d be a higher score. High empathy, sitting at about an 80%. And daring, at about 80% again. Clara prefers strength of mind over subtlety, strength sitting at around 80.
Armor:
Type and appearance: practical. Blocky and built. Thick militaristic armor plates with an equally blocky helmet. There are no easy angles on this armor, no subtlety. The armor plates are black, the armor underneath is red with gold accents at the joints and neck.
Add ons: armor and speed
Extra: I always imagined Clara using a collapsible staff that she usually carries on her hip.
Clara’s appearance:
Race: white
Height: medium, maybe 5ft 7in (1.7m)
Hair: straight thick blond hair. Shaved on sides and back. The rest is usually in a messy bun.
Eyes: green. They were always green. Just maybe not THAT green. Thanks Void.
Style: fashionable street wear. Casual and colorful. Wears a lot of different things but always wears something in red.
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Ok guys, in the recent news about one of the actors of The Chosen joining the IDF, along with Jenkins openly supporting Israel from the begining, I want to bring something else we can look at.
Despite not saying out loud (surely at the risk of been fired from everywhere when Marvel already fired him), in the twitter account of Jeff Loveness, the writer of the Judas comic, already liked posts of several Pro-Palestine accounts. Even liking the ones that asks for a ceasefire.
I don't have the whole picture but it seems that Loveness is in Palestine's favor. Just in a more subtle way considering his actual position.
As for the artist, Jakub Rebelka, there's no mentions of the conflict but it shouldn't be surprising. The man is a freelance artist. Getting a work this days is even harder than before. Who knows, maybe he supports Palestine too but could tell it at the open, considering how even the Zionists control the comic industry.
If they're supporting or even helping in between the shadows, I think it's also valid. True, they need to be paid for work, but also they could donate part of that money in secret, so no one could threaten their careers.
If all of this is true, support Loveness and Rebelka.
There's people out there who still go against the Zionists.
Support and spread the love for the Judas comic. True, maybe it doesn't have the impact of The Chosen in the internet, but gave us the perfect outcome for both Jesus and Judas, both trapped and doomed for the narrative.
And only love can set them free.
Please! Don't forget to support any other Pro-Palestine artist you can find and donate to any Palestinian charity you can remember. Gaza and it's people depend on our generous heart as Jesus could had wanted to happen.
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leporello headcanons posting, again
he’s my funny little guy i’m rescuing him from a wet cardboard box in the rain and taking him in and affixing a little ribbon around his neck
“are these for the canon setting or for a modern au” If it fits a setting it applies
very sorry for this. btw
he’s actually an extrovert and likes being around other people, he’s just… socially inept enough (and also. anxious enough) that he doesn’t really seem the part.
- he does love attention more than he admits. but he doesn’t really often get Positive attention which is the issue.
- because he doesn’t actually really get positive attention he tends to speak quickly and trips over his words in an effort to get out his Point before someone else- usually the don- shuts him up.
he loves sorting things! you knew this already because it’s canon but god he loves to sort things. and Number them
- he collected all sorts of weird things when he was a kid, and he loved labeling them and tracking them in his notebooks
- everyone thought he was going to grow up to be an accountant, especially seeing as he is good at math, but then he decided to go into historical archiving and studying museum collections instead much to everyone’s chagrin
he does have an anxiety disorder but tbh it’s very hard to figure out where “symptoms of anxiety disorder” ends and “signs of abuse from the don” begins
- although he does have a bit of a Realization of just how badly the don fucked him up when a few months after the don’s death he’s like Haha! Anxiety meds have started working again for me finally!… Wait a Minute
- he also does tend to flinch a lot from physical contact when he’s living/working for the don and for some time afterward… which is quite sad considering i like to think he’s very much a physical affection enjoyer
after the don’s death he’s very afraid of fire. like to a sort of obsessive degree
- for a while he doesn’t even allow like. lanterns or stoves to be on for more than absolutely life-or-death necessary
- eventually he gets sort of “used” to it but it still scares him and he has trouble looking at fire directly. but he figures out how to manage w/ that
also. his relationship with the other characters after the don’s death
- he and elvira are best friends natch. which is really funny bc otherwise they seem so different from one another and they have completely different friend groups outside of maybe one or two people. they’ve been mistaken for a couple while out in public together which they also find hilarious bc they both dress very obviously gay, elvira is into the whole punk butch style and leporello is a “wears floral pattern shirts he finds at charity thrift stores” homosexual
- he doesn’t really keep contact w/ anna and ottavio and he figures there’s a good reason bc he can’t really think of a -reason- they would want to keep in contact with him. but at some point a year or two after everything Happens some other friend tells him “oh did you hesr anna ended up breaking up with ottavio the other week and came out as a lesbian like immediately after” and then, not too long later, spots some of anna’s things left over at elvira’s apartment and thinks… Hmmm. Well That’s Something
- (when anna and elvira start dating he and anna do get along fine but he is always very awkward around her and neither of them really are even able to socially understand each other given they are very opposite. they’re cordial but they aren’t like… Friends outside of whenever elvira brings them both somewhere)
- leporello more or less leaves zerlina and masetto out of things on the basis of them being like. teenagers while he is a grown ass man dealing with his grown ass man issues. but i can imagine that perhaps if they hadn’t met in the circumstances they did they would have gotten along with him. i imagine both masetto and leporello are autistic and lep would have loved being able to mentor a younger person in The Ways of Autism but given the amount of Things leporello is Going TF Through i don’t think he would have been particularly good at it.
- he’s still scared of statues. perhaps even more than he is scared of fire. but every year or so he does go out and visit the commendatore’s grave. strangely it appears the statue only existed for that night it took the don to hell, as there’s no record of a statue being there before and there isn’t one there after, so it’s just. a regular if rather large grave. he talks to it- for a couple years after the don’s death it was “oh my god i’m a terrible person for (thing that leporello was being forced to do under the threat of death or worse) why didn’t you take me with the don” but eventually it becomes “god i’m so sorry about everything” and eventually after that it just becomes like. talking.
he talks to a lot of things really that aren’t living people. animals. inanimate objects. the dead. (although he doesn’t expect them to reply)
as said before multiple times i like to think he eventually becomes a couple with fiorello, the chronically-ignored servant from the barber of seville. he meets fiorello… a couple years after the don’s death i want to say, right when he’s really starting to heal and is emotionally stable enough to have a relationship that isn’t a Bad Idea
- fiorello is just… he’s genuine, above everything else. which is what leporello likes most about him, he never has to decipher what it is fiorello wants or feels because fiorello is always very open about it. he isn’t a man without faults but he’s loving and eager about many things, and he’s always very patient with leporello. in many ways fiorello is exactly what the don was not
- elvira initially really doesn’t trust fiorello out of hyper-cautiousness given leporello’s past. but then when lep introduces fiorello to her she’s like… oh this is just a sentient stuffed animal that knows how to gossip. you’re fine LOL
at some point, a few years down the line, leporello is about to fall asleep when he realizes. he has so many things that, when he was under the don’s abuse, he thought were impossible. he’s cared about. he has friends and a loving partner who are there for him. he has plenty of food and water, a job he loves (he’s a museum archivist), a quiet home and a stable routine to follow. and he’s safe. he can’t ever really even remember being this happy with life before, even if it’s considered unexciting and plain. idk. it’s sappy but… but it’s nice to think about.
finally. he would absolutely love watching jeopardy but by god he would be so terrible with the timing. could not win at jeopardy ON HIS LIIIIFE
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5, 20, and 50 from the bookworm meme?
5 - Favorite science fiction sub-genre(s). (dystopian, superhero, aliens etc.)
Surprisingly, I don't actually read a lot of science fiction? I watch a lot of it, sure, but I just... haven't really felt the need to prioritise reading it, I guess? And I haven't read most of the subgenres, certainly not enough to know all the distinctions.
I think we can safely say 'not dystopia' though. A lot of dystopias make me angry, usually at the people in charge who let things get into this mess. I know this probably isn't how you're supposed to react to them, but until I can train my brain to not do that, this is what we're stuck with. I can appreciate dystopian fiction for what it's trying to do, but I wouldn't say I enjoy it particularly.
I did enjoy Space Opera by Catherynne M. Valente and of course Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy my beloved. So maybe it's just books where there's less emphasis on 'the future is shit'?
20 - Where and how do you find new books to read?
They find me lmao
I am kind of joking, but it does feel like that because there are far too many I want to read!
An incomplete list:
General pop culture/osmosis
Film/TV adaptations
Library (browsing - I've never asked librarians for recommendations because I've never felt the need to)
Bookshops (ditto)
Charity shops (they get their own bullet point because I get SO MANY from charity shops, it's a problem)
Random reviews I might stumble across
The bit on the back of the first page where they list 'Other books by this author'
Social media (friends)
Friends (IRL - this is less common than you might expect)
Social media (author/publisher/bookshops etc)
Social media (hashtags - this is only rarely ventured into because it is a wild jungle)
Formerly Goodreads (I'm not on there any more)
Those sites which like to bombard you with '25 Books of This Type You Should Have Read, Like, Yesterday' (I will admit I avoid clicking on most of these because it is simply Too Much. Yes I should stop looking at that account/site.)
Books of book recommendations/suggestions (these date back to Before I Was Too Online For My Own Good)
Wikipedia lists of 'books by [author]'
Work (I see a LOT of interesting titles)
Presents from other people
Miss [English Teacher] that one time
You should now be beginning to see some possible reasons why I have too many I want to read.
50 - What kind of book have you never read but always hope to find at some point in the future?
This is a difficult one, because I can think of specific titles I haven't read but usually I've read at least one of the broad type/genre? And there are ones I hope to find but usually I've read them or at least something similar? And like, for the books where I've never read ones of that type usually I'm not bothered about whether I find one or not. I'm probably missing something really obvious here or just misinterpreting the question.
#asks#bluestockingcouture#books#thinking about it dystopias might have kind of discouraged me from science fiction a bit#which is a shame because obviously there IS sci fi which isn't that#but it feels like the sci fi most people talk about is dystopian
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Yesterday I was out with my rollator, I don't go outside much, in fact having lived here for two and a half years it was the first time I was spending some time out locally and it was because I had four hours to kill in-between two appointments at my GP clinic and I wanted to actually enjoy a bit of being outside for once.
What I didn't think about in advance was that I was eventually going to need to urinate, like I said, I really don't go out much, but I figure this will be fine because I'm surrounded by shops and restaurants.
It was not fine
McDonalds had disabled priority seating, but only an upstairs toilet and no lift.
The charity shop wouldn't let me use their staff toilet
The big department store only had upstairs toilets and no lift.
I went to a large supermarket with trolleys and parking, they had no customer toilets, and the staff member I asked was looking at me (sweaty with pain from walking, and very overweight from medications and PCOS) with such disdain I didn't bother asking if I could use the staff toilet.
Eventually I went into the library, which was a really nice old fashioned building so I was doubtful it would have an accessible toilet, and both their women's toilet and disabled toilet were out of order, at this point I am really desperate, but I'm thinking the librarians might know where there is a working accessible bathroom, or just let me into the disabled one because maybe only the sink isn't working or something and I've got sanitiser.
Thankfully the librarian said the upstairs (accessible by working lift) children's bathroom was accessible and I could use that, and escorted me to it in case I needed more help. (Apparently the downstairs bathrooms have been out of order for a while, and now all the bathrooms are unisex, they just haven't been given new signage)
Bless that librarian
It is ridiculous how difficult it was to find somewhere to pee. If I had been in my hometown I would have known exactly where to go in town center, but it is also just one department store in the middle of a small town, and again, I really haven't been out and about with my rollator much.
This is the first time I've felt really helpless in public because I was disabled and there weren't any accommodations.
I did not care for it, I don't want to feel like I can't go to new places because I might not be able to use a bathroom anywhere, I'm already worried about how much pain I'll be in from walking and how many days it will take me to recover.
I'm also so happy that I finally got to go to the library and set up an account, now I'll be able to use Libby to rent books, because most of the books I own and are in my TBR list are just too difficult for me to read with my levels of fatigue most days, and now I can rent books I'll hopefully actually be able to read.
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After reading Rei's profile, I have to know how Midoriya and Todoroki learn about her behavior and react to it
That particular scene is very up in the air, but here is what I have.
So after battling Taboo (main antagonist, mad scientist who uses her quirk to combine quirk genetics to make society destroying monsters. There is a lot with her, but I won't go in on that.) during like the maybe story midpoint. At the end of fight, the ShunCrew reunite after being separated and are very happy about it. This is in the presence of multiple heroes and their classmates.
Now the lead up to how the conversation goes is fuzzy, but Rei eventually says something along the lines of the ShunCrew should have committed suicide long ago because they are from unheroic backgrounds and Rei is very much a my hero version of classist.
As soon as those words leave her mouth, several things happen.
Everyone in the room is horrified (rightfully so) and none are so more horrified as Midoriya and Todoroki who are so shocked that it allows time for Iori Kano to verbally beat Rei Midoriya down and complete his character arc. As soon as they are awake from their stupor though, they immediately take Rei and leave. They apologize to the ShunCrew then just bolt with her in tow.
You don't really see the conversation between them, but Rei Midoriya does NOT return to UA or Ultra Academy. In fact, her dorm is stripped barren, her locker in the hero changing room is completely cleaned up, her desk is cleaned out, like she is GONE. Their teacher (who I haven't decided who it is but I am leaning towards Kendo) tells the class that Rei has left.
Now for you, I'll explain what happened.
Upon leaving, Midoriya and Todoroki are dead silent in the car and Rei senses she has done something wrong but doesn't understand what. As soon as they get home, Midoriya runs off to cry (He may have gotten therapy for those quirkless years but having your own child rip those open is not fun) and Todoroki sends Rei to her room. Rei tries to text her former friend Isao, but isao basically tells her to fuck off and then blocks her number and her social media accounts. She later learns that every other classmate has as well.
The next day, the house is still quiet and Rei is very upset about that because Midoriya and Todoroki take shfits watching her as they go off. Her parents are collecting formal accountants of what Rei has done, and are growing more and more upset.
After a week of this uncomfortable silence, Rei is finally sat down and told that she will be removed from UA because she can either be expelled or leave and her parents chose her leaving. Rei will be forced to partake in charity work, and attend a normal university. Rei is very upset about this, and fights with her parents all the way about it.
Now at some point in her profile, I mentioned that she refuses for her story to be over and I mean it. Rei starts participating in a normal life, but she refuses to give up on become a hero... even if she has to do it illegally.
That is right, it is vigilante Rei time.
The idea of vigilante Rei is that she finds another way to become a hero, a more spiteful way but a way. While she works as a vigilante she starts to meet other vigilantes, and kind ends up being forced to see the world through those effected by the police brutality and quirk bias caused by the KiriBaku Scandals.
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MaDe TMA au!!
Characters: Declan Gerritz, Mathias Iversen (OCs)
Verse: The Magnus Archives AU, in this the Magnus Institute is in York, Declan is the Archivist, Mathias is an assistant who has been marked for the Web, the main antagonists are Martin and John. John in Elias’s place and Martin in Peter Lukas’s place.
Content: Spiders, technology malfunctioning, puppets
[CLICK]
DECLAN (THE ARCHIVIST)
Statement of Mathias Iverson, regarding a strange encounter with a television programme. It occurred in his flat in Westfield, York. Statement given 14th of February 2023. Audio recording by Declan Gerritz, Head Archivist of the Magnus Institute. Statement begins. [A PAUSE FOLLOWED BY A SHAKY BREATH FROM DECLAN] When-whenever you’re ready, Mads.
MATHIAS
Oh. Right. Yeah. It happened five days ago, at least, I think it did. I’ve not… been home since. I always wind down after work with a film. Disney film, usually. This time it was Løvernes Konge. I still have the old video tapes from when I was a kid, they still work really well which is good because I don’t like the English titles as much. I also got an old VCR I picked up in a charity shop, it was really cheap. I find it more relaxing to watch them that way, I guess. People keep saying I should just get a Disney Plus account but… anyway, not relevant. I was watching Løvernes Konge and it had just gotten to the bit where Simba is going to the elephant graveyard. I don’t know if this is relevant but just above my television for a while there has been a spider for about a week or so. Not the biggest I’ve ever seen. But not like, small either. It had a web all built and I have been leaving it alone because well spiders keep pests away. Anyway. The screen… Changed. It went to static. At first I didn’t question it, thought maybe it was a problem with the VCR. I mean the thing is fucking old. But when I went over to check the cable or smack it I saw my silhouette in the static. My outline. A black shadow of me. I put my hand up and my shadow self moved too. I turned the television off and took the tape from the VCR, and it was fine I suppose. But I could smell burning. I tried not to think about it. My upstairs neighbours are terrible cooks and my downstairs neighbours get stoned fairly frequently so it’s not too out of the ordinary.
Anyway so I ignored the television for the rest of the night and listened to some true crime podcasts instead. I fell asleep during one. It was about the Cray twins, it was pretty inaccurate and glossed over- well- that doesn’t matter. When I woke up in the middle of a new episode I did not recognise the television was on. It was showing a static screen like before with silhouettes on it. But the silhouettes? They were like. Fanden. They were all spiders. They were just the black shapes of eight legged creatures. Had to be spiders, right? At first I thought they were on the screen but I even put my hand on it and all I could feel was the glass and the slight static hum. But the spiders moved. They cleared space like I spooked them. I tried turning my television off but it didn’t do anything. Eventually I unplugged it and went back to sleep. I tried to ignore it. Maybe it was a technical glitch or maybe it was a supernatural thing that if I left it alone and showed I wasn’t going to interfere maybe it would leave me alone.
Anyway. I went to bed, and I slept pretty well actually. I slept for four hours, and got up around three in the morning. I sort of dismissed what had happened as a dream. I started making my meal prep for the week. I have a specific type of insomnia where I can only sleep for four hours at a time most nights so I try to be productive when I’m awake. I mostly cut up vegetables and cook pasta. I quite like the flat at night, there’s not as much noise from upstairs and downstairs at that time. Anyway. When I went into the living room to sit and maybe watch something on Netflix when… the television. It was- it was already… on. It was on. I’d left it unplugged. I vividly remember pulling the plug from the wall. But no, the plug was… well it was back in obviously. Anyway. On the television, instead of spiders this time it was a strange programme instead, it was these puppets, they looked like… there is this kids show from back ho- back in Denmark named Kaj and Andrea. It’s got these puppets and they are a frog and a bird. But they look. They looked wrong, I can’t explain… the proportions weren’t right and they moved a little too humanly, I think. It was smooth as if they weren’t being controlled and the bird’s wings moved like arms. They were talking in a mix of languages, I caught bits of English and Danish, then maybe German and French. Eventually, I noticed the spiders on the screen, slowly edging from the sides and taking up more and more space. It was then they both turned to the screen and … they were talking in English. Clear English. And they were talking to me. At first I thought I was insane, like no they’re just talking at the camera but- but I don’t know. It started with them saying it’s awfully late, how I shouldn’t be watching television at this time, then they began saying I shouldn’t sit so close to the screen. It was then they got bigger, and they grew teeth. And they said, clear as day:
“Do you think we need more legs, Mathias?”
I tried to turn it off. But the buttons… at some point the television had been covered in web and I’d not noticed. How had I not noticed? I- I went to unplug it but the web went all the way down the wire and attached it to the socket in the wall. I tried to rip it out but it wouldn’t budge. The stupid fucking puppets on the TV laughed and laughed and laughed. They said- they said “don’t you wish to play with us, Mathias?” How fucking creepy and cliche is that?
Anyway. I packed a bag and ran. Hung out in the 24 hour cafe just outside of the city centre until it was time to go to work. And I’ve been secretly living in the Archives ever since. Sorry. Erm. Am I in trouble?
DECLAN (THE ARCHIVIST)
Statement ends. [Sighs.] No, you’re not in trouble. John doesn’t seem to mind. And Martin… I don’t think he’s noticed.
MATHIAS
I have evidence. For the research. I have photos on my phone. Of the TV and of the cartoon. Probably would be better if I had a video…
DECLAN (THE ARCHIVIST)
No, no. That’s great, Mads. Obviously it’s best you don’t investigate personally, since something clearly wants to hurt you. And you can’t go back home. So. Yes. I think- we can set you up a proper bed in the Archives. Have some security watching out for whatever is doing this. Are you… Are you okay, Mads?
MATHIAS
I suppose so. [Breath quickens and there are tears in his voice.] I want my things. I want my things here and I want them not to be covered in web. I want my home back. I want it to be clean. I want-
DECLAN (THE ARCHIVIST)
Hey, hey- [Shuffling due to him moving to hold Mathias.] I know, I know Mads. It’s gonna be okay. We’ll deal with this. And I’ll keep you safe.
MATHIAS
[Sniffs.] Guess I can’t say all the statements we get are bullshit now, huh?
[DECLAN LAUGHS]
[CLICK]
#the magnus archives#envi writes#declan gerritz#Mathias iverson#tma fan content#TMA au#tma fanfic#spiders tw#horror
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The Redbubble Bummer
The Redbubble Bummer
Redbubble announced, at the tail end of April, starting now in May, that they were going to charge a flat fee for people who make money on their site. This sucks and here’s a thousand words about how this sucks and how I may stop making stuff to put up on Redbubble, which, also, sucks.
Now, you may not be aware of how things work on Redbubble. Right now, if you buy a shirt off Redbubble, which costs like, $30, I get like $3, for making the design. They get the remaining $27, which I assume covers manufacturing, transport, all that jazz. This isn’t a great deal for me but that’s okay. I understand that’s the economic realities of print-on-demand services, and it also is up front and honest about these things. If you sell something on Redbubble, you get a very small margin out of it. This makes Redbubble a bad site to use for, for example, charities or promotions. The main thing Redbubble offers is a way to get extremely niche things made at all, rather than made cheaply.
The realities of Redbubble production are pretty low stakes. I make a new product regularly, release it to Redbubble, and promote it via my existing networks, which are very low-impact. The result of this is, acros all of the designs I sell, I get something like $20 to $40 a month, usually in the middle, in commissions, and that’s after over five years of constant production and promotion. The most popular thing I’ve ever made is the Friend of Blahaj sticker, so it’s probably some of those.
The new flat fee system from Redbubble indicates that they’ll be taking a flat fee of around $13 from that $30 a month, which takes my monthly income from ‘a pizza’ to almost half that.
But the fee’s not fixed! See, if you’re a power user of Redbubble, in a data driven way, then they waive the fee. There’s no clear way to become a power user, but they talk about promoting the site and driving engagement with the site as ways to do it. If you do that, they say, you’ll get access to new services that I don’t have access to, don’t want, and don’t care to want. I don’t know what they are, they can’t possibly incentivise me to become a power user. The power user incentive for me is to get rid of the flat fee.
What the hell then, does a power user look like?
I’ve been talking about and promoting Redbubble for over five years. I’ve been using it regularly. I’ve sold hundreds of things, regularly. I’m not a power user. I have no idea how to become a power user, and that, I think, is insidious. I think it says something worrying that they don’t know for sure what might possibly get me out from under this fee, and I don’t know how to find out. It gives the impression that this is not data driven as much as it is arbitary, and looking for metrics I do not understand nor can I manage to.
This fee also hurts unconsolidated presentation. I put all my designs up on the Talen Lee Redbubble. Fox puts her designs up on the Fox Lee Redbubble. But now, that means both of those accounts get the same flat fee; if we were posting together on the same redbubble account, then we’d pay one of those flat fees, rather than two. Our combined income from these sources is small, and now, Redbubble’s new incentive system makes it hardly worth the effort for Fox to upload at all.
Right now, Redbubble have instituted a fee that feels to me like a way of punishing people like me, specifically, people who are making enough money to notice the loss of half of it, but not enough money to make pushing into Power User status a meaningful proposition. There are still going to be people uploading zero effort stuff and stolen art to get a copy of for themselves, and maybe leave it up in the hope of scoring a few dollars, whatever. There are going to be those power users who have enough social media reach and marketing space to demand the attention that means they don’t notice this, and that’s fine. That’s probably the thing you do if Redbubble is your job.
It also feels like a hack to my shins personally, because I used to advocate for my students to use Redbubble as a creative front-end because it was so close as to frictionless as could be for a business-level demand. There wasn’t any ‘if you advertise for us, we’ll give you more of your money.’ Because that’s the way this fee feels. It’s not framed as increasing costs or inflation, and quite frankly, if they’d just said ‘yeah, rate increase on everything, sorry, can’t help it, economy’ I probably would have just sucked it up and accepted it. I’m pretty passive, and I’m sure they’ve done it. When they ding fanart I do and tell me that hey, we can’t host this any more it’s too infringey on a brand and we’re not going to fight for it, then sure, whatever. I guess that sucks but I can deal with it.
I can’t really be a good-faith advocate for this company more, and that sucks! It sucks because I recommended this site to people, and, in the posting hopper, there are other posts coming that are about Redbubble material that I made months back. And I’ve complained and hey, maybe the complaints are going to do their job and that’ll be okay and I won’t have to feel bad or worse, consider relocating my entire online merch production to some new, better way of doing things, and maybe I’ll finally go completely wild and invest in the materials needed to make my own merch and sell that at conventions (this is not going to happen it just feels more viable at this point than relying on another online front-end that can just decide to do this stuff to me later). I may just stop doing these t-shirt designs because now they don’t even have the theoretical application of ‘maybe a few people will buy some and I’ll get a few bucks out of it.’ It’s entirely possible that I may not make enough money in the new structure to cover the fee!
Instead, they present this new fee addition and then show me how to get out of it by being a good social media promoter of their brand, and it’s very hard to not see this as an economist trying to outwit me into doing a new job.
Check it out on PRESS.exe to see it with images and links!
#Making
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As a fellow ex phan here for the drama, tell me why you dislike Dan hehe I want to see if it's the same reasons I have
oh ive been waiting for this lmfao
there’s an entire plethora of reasons as to why i now find dan rather unbearable. i’ll go ahead and say my experience in the phandom was not a particularly good one. and maybe that tainted my view? probably. but it also contributes in a fair enough way for me to go “yeah, this guy ISNT great”
one reason that i’ll start with is: his fanbase. this man is literally the equivalent to a wet yoghurt lid. flaccid and useless, literally nothing about dan is special in any way. he’s not funny, he can’t act. his style of videos is very outdated (hence why he probably won’t return to story times any time soon) and yet.. the phandom will suck his dick for so little in return. he wrote a mental health book? because he suffers with mental health issues? okay. once i was constipated so now i guess im a doctor of the bowels. his humour is… god. it’s fucking horrible. he’s literally stuck in 2014 with his “im a walking funeral” jokes and “i wear black like my soul” persona like damn you got the whole room laughing 😐😐 but of course, phannies will go feral for that shit and he believes he’s good at everything he does, so now we’re supposedly being cursed with a dan howell comedy tour so… thanks world, i guess. the whole class suffers mentality.
he takes zero accountability for anything and yet is often hailed as one of the unproblematic youtubers of his time. so okay, he didn’t fuck a cat or do any shane levels of terrible, but omg dan and phil ARE problematic. i don’t care or believe in cancel culture so like, it doesn’t matter, but dan and phil have done stupid, bad, shady shit in the past AND in recent years. they have bad management with their merch line, they fuck up orders and constantly rip off their fans and have never ever made a single comment about how badly it’s being run, or ever offered an apology to the people who have been ripped off. literally in the height of the pandemic phil was selling the most ugliest, most bland, primark looking ass pjs for like £50 or something stupid like that. and dan does the same. doesn’t give his fans any content but WILL charge you £40 for a walmart journal and some cards with loopy sparkly writing on it for your daily affirmations ✨✨ but phannies dismiss this because “it’s my money i can do what i like with it!!” like damn girlie get yourself a bank employee to help you it’s okay lol
he is a personality vacuum. this kinda ties in with my first point about him being a 2014 tumblr post in a white mans form but yeah. dude is straight up BORING to listen to. dnp worked as a brand, cool. alone they suck. literally phil is a buzzfeed machine that can’t stop making 😲 faces in ever thumbnail because god forbid he does something creative and original for once (spoiler: he’s not that funny either) and dan talks in this droll, monotone voice, sprinkling in a few edgy jokes then talks about sucking cock, then bitches about his sad, sad life (another spoiler: his life isn’t that bad like babygirl shut up) and then ANOTHER joke about how a dick in his ass (tasteful) and then tops it off with a joke about wearing black.. something something, he has depression and was closested so im not allowed to be mean to him. waaahhhh idc.
he also made jokes about having so much gay sex that he caught every disease possible whilst hosting a charity livestream for AIDS… and of course every phannie and their girlfriends wet themselves laughing whilst i was straight faced like. how is that remotely funny? but of course as it says in the phannie handbook of god: im now allowed to make comments about dan and his sexuality or however he decides to present himself on the internet because he has depression…………,,., even though Dan said in his depression video he doesn’t want it to define him. but alas, what do i know! im a bitter ex phannie who is mean and evil 🤧 he’s also made jokes about lesbians and also been pretty racist and never apologied or even acknowledged it. i think he just quietly deleted old videos and phannies were cool with it whilst in the same breath they were screaming about shane dawson for doing the same (and rightly so i hate his guts too btw)
he’s lazy, unfunny and pretty spoilt, imo. he has a “me, me, me!!!” attitude to everything and wants everything with very little effort on his end. and why do phannies go wild for it?? beats me. white skin and curly hair maybe? idk, i hope they find a cure for them soon ❤️❤️❤️
#i AM bitter and i AM evil and mean#this was long and rambly but yeah that’s it pretty much#idk he just grates on me#if you knew me when i was a phannie… no you didn’t#that emmy is dead 💔#ask#anon#phannie#dan howell#Phil lester#dan and phil#phan#phandom
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