#maybe ill do a shaggy one next lmao

[astridthevalkyrie]

call me, beep me, if you wanna reach me

‘did you really just send me off with the kim possible theme song’

‘if you just call my name!’ ‘wow, you’re a bit of a dork, aren’t you?’

Hiccup is plain. Astrid is italicized.

(12:10) the next time i see you i am going to KICK the SHIT out of you i swear

(12:12) ouch. harsh. but i’m assuming it was for someone else.

(12:13) oh

(12:13) fuck

(12:13) yeah

(12:14) sorry, that was meant for my friend

(12:14) she changed her number recently and i havent deleted this one yet

(12:15) what did she do to deserve you kicking “the SHIT” out of her?

(12:15) (mildly concerning, by the way)

(12:17) she borrowed my homework to copy

(12:17) said she would give it back before my class started

(12:18) guess who DIDNT have their homework when it was being collected

(12:21) yikes.

(12:21) yeah, i’d be mad too.

(12:22) (its not concerning if shes my friend)

(12:22) depends. WILL you kick the shit out of her?

(12:23) no, ill probably just

(12:23) i dont know

(12:23) punch her arm

(12:30) see, that’s much better.

(12:32) your welcome, stranger

(12:32) i’m happy my friend-punishing isnt interfering with your morals

*********

(12:55) hello?

(12:55) was it because i called you stranger?

(12:55) because like

(12:56) no offense

(12:56) you are literally just someone i accidentally texted

*********

(2:18) oh, sorry.

(2:18) i had lunch and then class started and the teacher is really strict so

(2:18) you know.

(2:20) (why would I take offense to you calling me a stranger?)

(2:23) i dont know, maybe you wanted nudes

(2:23) girls dont send strangers nudes

(2:24) are you saying that once you get to know me you’re going to send me nudes???

(2:24) are you asking for them?

(2:25) gods, no.

(2:26) good, that response was cock-or-block for you

(2:26) HA

(2:27) I refuse to believe you were gonna pass up the opportunity to mess with me if I wanted nudes

(2:28) okay, fine, pop quiz

(2:28) an old dude asks you for nudes

(2:29) how do you most effectively mess with him?

(2:30) hmmmm.

(2:30) what website is this on?

(2:31) omegle

(2:31) WHY WAS I ON OMEGLE

(2:30) you wanted to make friends

(2:30) considering my life so far

(2:31) that’s not far off for me, I’ll take it.

(2:31) you can’t send pictures on omegle, though.

(2:31) i feel like youve had some extensive experience with omegle

(2:32) I may or may not have used it a little during...ninth grade?

(2:32) oh god you poor thing

(2:32) anyway

(2:32) he asks for your kik

(2:35) oh shit uh

(2:35) lovergirl420

(2:37) THATS the best you can come up with?

(2:37) the sex bot gods have deemed you unworthy

(2:38) guess I’ll be able to go on tumblr then.

(2:39) omg

(2:39) youre pretty funny, you know

(2:39) thank you, I aim to please.

(2:41) if you had stuck around for the end, “lovergirl420’ would only send pictures of shaggy.

(2:43) nude shaggy?

(2:47) why would you think I have nude shaggy on my phone????

(2:48) fair question, however

(2:48) why would you have regular shaggy on your phone?

(2:49) i expected better

(2:50) bold of you to assume shaggy didn’t just appear on my phone himself.

(2:51) that’s how powerful he is.

(2:53) i give that meme TWO more days

(2:54) then you’re being merciful

(2:54) i give it...a few more hours?

(2:56) youre underestimating the shaggy meme fandom

(3:00) that is horrifying, holy crap.

(3:00) 1. did you have that on your phone (in which case, you have no right to judge me) or did you search it up?

(3:01) 2. thor threw his axe at purple mcwarlord when he had all the infinity stones and hurt him, HE is the strongest.

(3:06) youre telling me, i love him

(3:06) and no, i found it on google

(3:07) also “purple mcwarlord” lmao

(3:09) so, a list of things I know about you so far:

(3:09) you like thor

(3:10) you’re definitely on tumblr

(3:10) a number of dudes have been hurt because you messed with them on omegle

(3:10) you have no qualms about hurting your friends

(3:11) you hate apostrophes???

(3:14) ugh, im not gonna switch to the other keyboard just to put a little line between my letters

(3:14) don’t you switch for the comma?

(3:15) commas are worth it

(3:15) nice logic.

(3:16) i gotta go, my cousin is goading me into playing chess.

(3:18) cant say no to that

(3:18) but while youre gone

(3:18) heres what i know about YOU

(3:19) you suck at making fake kik names

(3:19) pacifist?? maybe??

(3:20) punctuation freak if i ever saw one

(3:20) more funny than the average person, honestly

(3:21) i’d like to keep talking to you if we’re not like, too far apart in age

(3:21) see, that was two apostrophes, just for you

*********

(5:34) I’m honored.

(5:40) did you win the chess game?

(5:42) I always do.

(5:43) oho, someones a bit of a braggart

(5:44) if you met my cousin, you’d understand.

*********

(11:03) I’m a 17 year old guy, by the way.

(11:04) and I’d like to keep talking too.

(11:20) huh

(11:20) im a 17 year old girl

(11:20) weird

(11:30) it’d be weirder if you were, like, 40

(11:32) i could be

(11:33) i could be a viking for all you know

(11:36) aaaand “viking” is your contact name now. thanks.

(11:39) so i guess were gonna keep talking?

(11:41) I guess we are.

(11:41) so, you know.

(11:42) call me, beep me, if you wanna reach me.

(11:43) did you really just send me off with the kim possible theme song

(11:43) if you just call my name!

(11:45) wow you’re a bit of a dork aren’t you?

(11:45) just a little bit.

(11:47) great. so youre “dork” in my phone now

(11:47) excellent.

(11:47) i’ll talk to you soon, viking.

(11:48) count on it, dork

#httyd #hiccstrid #modern au #hiccup #astrid #valkyrie stories