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#maybe should've made two posts for this
icantalk710 · 12 days
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Not too bad a day at the office yesterday--helps that we can use our patio in nice weather again 😌--leading into a decent arm day workout 💪🏽 (despite how long it took to get a bench for chest press work 😩)
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vivenecii · 8 months
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hey no pressure for this btw it’s not that serious :)
i like drawing and stuff but i don’t want to post any of my stuff online right now because i don’t think it’s good enough but im also very aware that im going to miss the boat on my favourite fandoms and artists being active
any help for the fomo? <3
Yeah, alright. S'funny you ask me. Familiar mindset. History has come full circle, and all that.
First of all, don't ever think about what others may consider to be good enough. Ever. I mean it. You'll end up in a miserable pit, being stressed about every drawing you make to look good. Like, just don't bother wondering if others will like it or not. You'll never guess it. A mystery of an universe, that is.
May I off topic remind how some people despise Picasso's art? Guy's famous. And yet there are people who love, and who hate his works. As there always will be.
Yeah, so just, like, ignore the "will people like it" question whatsoever. They will and they won't. Simple as that. The amount of love you get after posting doesn't depend only on the art being enough, it also depends on mysterious algorithms, daily sense of humour of the all-religions-gods and fucking alignement of planets.
In fact, ignore the "good enough" completely. You drew something you like and want to share? Post it. Just, like, do it, no regrets. The only thing you risk is having a few posts with a few notes. You can gain way more than that. A general rule of thumb, if by doing something you can gain more than lose, do it.
S'fine to set some goals, too. Small. Tiny. Achievable. Celebrate your first three notes like you've won a—well, whatever it is that is the equivalent of Grammys or Oscars in art. My honest-to-God goal, whenever I post, is 13 notes. It's less? Well, life goes on, doesn't it? It's more? Fine too, by me. I surely won't complain about that.
Yeah. Well. Er. I'll risk sounding awfully cliché, but don't give up. Post whatever you like, don't care if it's good enough and how many notes it gets, just enjoy it and have fun in the fandoms. And that would be it, I think. Hope that helps.
Edit: Also, cause I didn't mention it and I probably should have. If you don't want to post something, like when you're certain you don't want to post, nothing forces you. Taking breaks from social media is important and all that, and yes, you will miss out on stuff. But there will be new stuff. Just don't let the fear of "what if it's not enough" stop you. It's the thing I regret the most, y'a know, the sheer amour of things I could've shared with the world and I didn't because I didn't think they were good enough.
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asjjohnson · 1 year
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Here's the other pumpkin I carved this year (I did it yesterday but I was too busy doing other things, like cooking the pumpkin on the stove, and didn't carve it until late).
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Dracula on the front, simple bat design on the back.
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bangtanshelves · 1 month
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JJK Fanfic Recos
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Hi. These are some of the fanfics I've read.
I've read A LOT but I'll only be including the ones I really enjoyed reading.
I'm in the process of recollecting them, please bare with me.
I'm also updating this post often, so whenever I end finishing a fic I like I just post it here. hehe
💓 - Fluff ❤‍🩹 - angst 🥵 - smut 🚨 - violence/drugs 🤪 - crack ⭐ - fav 🎣 - latest addition to the list
⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚. SERIES ⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚.
My Love is Here - @/solemnreads
Completed ✅ ⭐
Genre: 💓, ❤‍🩹 (so much angst, I love it), 🥵 summary: "You didn’t mean for it to happen. It’s not like you purposely woke up one day and thought “Hey I’m going to fall in love with my best friend!” No, that is not at all what happened."
Knife's Edge - @/readyplayerhobi
Completed ✅
Genre: 💓, ❤‍🩹,🥵, 🚨 The Jeon Clan is Family, built on blood and loyalty. It’s been an unspoken fact that one day you will marry the heir to the Clan, Jeon Jungkook. You would be a fool to deny that you love him, but what happens when you meet a blue haired man who offers you a chance at normality?
Four Seven Eight - @/jiminrings
Completed ✅ ⭐
Genre: 💓, ❤‍🩹 (fic made me cry) ,🥵 you’re secure when it comes to loving jungkook, knowing that your husband loves you beyond words. what you aren’t so secure about is his first love — someone who isn’t you.alternatively, jungkook’s married to you, but he still celebrates his anniversary with his ex out of sentimentality.
Close to you - @/muniimyg
Completed ✅ ⭐
genre: 💓, 🤪 It should've been easier than this, right?In which oc and Jungkook sleep together and he can't get over it.
Falling Skies - @/fortunexkookie
Completed ✅ ⭐
Genre: 💓, ❤‍🩹,🥵 Jeon Jiyeon was your childhood best friend; her brother, Jungkook, was something else entirely. Once upon a time, she had called you her sun and him her moon; it was fitting, given the constant push-and-pull between you two. You used to consider him a friend, but then he had gone from endearingly frustrating dumb boy to card-carrying fuckboy so fast it had given you whiplash.
Please Love Me - @/ahunderedtimesover
Completed ✅ ⭐
Genre: 💓, ❤‍🩹,🥵 As the only unmarried Jeon and Kim children, your families propose a union to symbolize your unbreakable bond that spans generations. But despite developing an affection for Jungkook growing up, he never returned it; he never seemed to like you, actually. You’re okay with the proposal, but surprise surprise, he isn’t.
Lowkey - @/xpeachesncream
Completed ✅ ⭐
Genre: 💓, ❤‍🩹, 🥵 In order to pass organic chemistry and pay off your car damages from an accident, all you have to do is help the nerd, Jeon Jungkook, with a few things: pretend to be his girlfriend and teach him the way of dating.
Hotter Than Hell - @/chateautae
Completed ✅ ⭐
Genre: ❤‍🩹, 🥵 Jungkook, Lucifer and king of hell, has been cast out of the crimson underworld for a reason he's unsure of. Embarking on his journey for the answers should've been easy, if it weren't for you, the human that nurses his wounded body in her home, and accidentally witnesses the truth of his identity. Kickstarting a hellish adventure with the devil himself, you discover Lucifer is the most infuriating company ever; and Jungkook finds out that maybe his answer to returning home lies within his annoying human confidant.
An Ode to a Broken Heart - @/smoochkooks
Ongoing... ✍
Genre: ❤‍🩹 (bro I've been crying over this fic for days), 🥵 (future smut)  you’ve watched jeon jungkook slip out of your reach your entire life. now it’s time for you to finally move on, bury the past and open a new chapter. however, you’re doing it in your own, unconventional way - by publishing anonymously a novel about your miserable relationship.
Mutual Help - @/personasintro
Ongoing... ✍ (this is also posted on AO3)
Genre: 💓, ❤‍🩹,🥵 (damn... that's all i can say)  in order for you to pretend to be his girlfriend, he helps you with your sexual desires ⏤ he calls it mutual help
Way Back Home - @/solemnreads
Ongoing... ✍
Genre: 💓, ❤‍🩹 (please i really love angsty fics, fite me), 🥵
"Please tell me this isn't what I think it is" he asks you with tears in his eyes. You look down at the sight of your son with an oxygen mask on his face while your daughter is sleeping on the couch near the wall. You look into his eyes, broken, and sad. You've dreamt of this day for years, wondering how he would react. But here you are, hoping he could've meet the twins under different circumstances. "Yes... they're your children."
Strawberry Kisses - @/pixieknj
Ongoing... ✍
Genre: ❤‍🩹, 🥵 (Chapter 1 has been posted, but its something else) Jungkook is notoriously known as a f^ckboy who doesn’t eat p^ssy, until he finally gets alone with you…
⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚. ONE-SHOTS or TWO-SHOTS ⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚.
The Right Choice - @/honeytae
Genre: 💓 for as long as you've known Jungkook, you would think that you're witnessed all sides of him. But when you notice the way he's looking at you right now, you think you may be wrong about that.
Rainy Days - @/rklve
Genre: 💓, ❤‍🩹,🥵 Your life choices left not only yours, but Jungkook's hear broken in pieces. Now you're back in town, and just like Pluto, even if its cold and dark he tends to orbit around his sun forever.
High Demand - @/bunnyhugs77
Genre: 💓, 🥵, 🚨 A modern day Romeo and Juliet
SOJU - @/hoseoksluna
Genre: ❤‍🩹,🥵 Jungkook gives you all that he has—his feelings, his dominance and his cum.
Lost & Found - @/kooktrash
Genre: ❤‍🩹 (if you squint), 🥵 your college years have never been something you dwelled on for too long. you didn’t want to think of all the chances you lost and that’s why when the guy you had a crush on moves back to town, you try not to let it affect you again. but then he brings up old memories that didn’t go the way you thought they had and you’re thrown for a loop. you’re stuck between finding something new with him and falling back into old habits of never standing up for yourself. it probably doesn’t help that he dated your best friend, where everything seemed to go wrong.
Bottle Up Old Love - @/wintaerbaer
Genre: 💓, ❤‍🩹,🥵 Jungkook may have broken up with you a year ago, but that's not going to stop him from coming to your rescue when he sees you being cornered by a creep.
Pink Sapphire - @/jiminrings ⭐
Genre: 💓, ❤‍🩹(please I'm a sucker for this) ,🥵 Having Jungkook as a husband is great as far as arranged marriages could go; he's easy to love. Your relationship's perhaps become so easy that Jungkook doesn't think sometimes— and that's what makes it the easiest for you to hate him.
Will it fit? - @/jeonsweetpea
Genre: 💓, 🥵, 🤪, ❤‍🩹 (just a little bit) So what if your roommate caught you masturbating? At least he forgot about it the next day. But he can't exactly forget the big dildo you left in your shared bathroom...
Break up with your Boyfriend - @/spideyjimin
Genre: 💓, ❤‍🩹,🥵 Jungkook, the campus fuckboy, has decided to make you his next victim, but you're far from being like any of his previous hookups. You're not single. You're actually in a very long-term relationship with Baekhyun, the man you consider the love of you life, but it's for sure something that won't stop Jungkook. He wants you, and he's going to do absolutely everything to have you, even falling in love.
Paint me naked - @/gimmethatagustd
Genre: 💓, ❤‍🩹,🥵 After the mysteriously hot guy in your university class starts taking an interest in you, should you really trust that he's not like all the other college fuckboys? Especially when his best friend is the guy who broke your heart?
I hate you, I love you - @j/ungblue 🎣
Genre: ❤‍🩹,🥵 You hated him at seven, warmed up to him at twelve, and liked him at fifteen. Now the two of you are twenty years old and inseparable best friends... and you're absolutely in love with him; he's in love too—just not with you.
How to Get a Guy - @/taeshobipop 🎣
Genre: 💓, ❤‍🩹, 🥵 Star basketball player Jeon Jungkook has a reputation as the ultimate fuckboi. He's loved by everyone. Everyone. And you would have followed suit if he had not broken all your strict Roommate Rules™ within the first week of his stay. Jungkook, on the other hand, thinks you're absolutely bizarre. But there's a silver lining— Mr. Fuckboi here knows basketball captain Min Yoongi, your dreadfully clueless crush. He strikes up a deal with you: he'll teach you the ways of flirting if you lessen your load of rules (so Jungook can continue persuing his way through the ladies on campus). Yet the longer Jungkook spends with you, the more he realizes that maybe he doesn't want to tbe the campus fuckboi anymore. The problem is, how does he prove that to you?
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luveline · 4 months
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that spencer x bombshell one you just posted has me giggling and kicking my feet I think I’m in love with YOU 🫵
Now I’m thinking of spencer x bombshell where the team starts to not view reid as unwillingly tortured by her flirting. Like maybe Morgan makes a comment to reid about something he does and is like “don’t torture the poor girl” and he’s like oh shit I’M the one torturing too now?
im in love with YOU !! for you, ty for requesting ♡ fem
“Difficult,” you say, resting your head on the table. 
“I know.” Spencer wiggles his pen back and forth between two fingers, thinking hard. This case is proving to be indecipherable. None of the details want to add up, and no clear profile geographical or otherwise appears. 
“Useless.” 
“Who, me or you?” 
“Us.” You sigh morosely. “Mostly me.” 
You're not being serious. Spencer huffs a soft laugh and continues to turn the details over in his head. You open your notebook and scratch down a couple of sentences with a pen, a visual thinker. Your mind map turns to a second iteration and then a third. You can't connect the dots because they're too far apart from each other; Spencer can't do it either. Not alone. 
He scoots his chair as close to yours as possible, your knees touching, his elbow in your side. “Can I look?” he asks. 
“Of course you can. Sorry about my handwriting.” 
He shakes his head. Your handwriting is perhaps the only thing about you he wouldn't say was one hundred percent perfect. You can't control it like other things. It is perfect, in a way, because it's yours, but you've been writing quickly and he struggles to make out the occasional letter. 
He leans in toward the page. “What's this word?” he asks. 
You lean in to see it. “Coruscated.” 
“The swimming pool?” he asks, lifting his face to yours. You're closer now, and beautiful like this. He can see the powder under your eyes, the lines in your irises, the slight fading of your lipstick at the corners of your mouth. There's an eyelash on your cheek. He lifts a hand to wipe it away. “What's so important about that?” 
“It reminded me of something…” You pause as he touches your face. “Something…” Your voice lilts up in question, half-shudder. 
“Eyelash,” he explains, blowing it off of his finger. 
“Right,” you say, eyes oddly wide and soft at once, your eyebrows lifted at the starts. 
“You okay?” 
“Is she okay? Reid, you're torturing the poor girl. Give her some air,” Morgan says with a chuckle. 
Spencer leans backwards in surprise, no idea what Morgan could possibly mean. Your eyes relax as you regain some personal space, your hands coming together loosely in your lap. You laugh weakly. 
Spencer looks you up and down. He's torturing you? That doesn't make sense. For as long as you've known one another, the team has joked that your flirty ways and feminine wiles are too much for Spencer to handle. You once gave him an apology he didn't want, worried you actually were hurting him by being your playful self, and he'd set that straight immediately. You don't torture him. It's a lot of feelings to be doted on so much by you, and painful isn't one of them. Overwhelming, sometimes, and exciting, sure. 
He never realised he had the power to overwhelm you. Not until that moment. You offer a funny smile far from your usual smirk and try to steamroll Morgan's claim. “Guess I should've made a wish.” 
“What would you wish for?” Spencer asks quietly. 
You still. Morgan shakes his head in disapproval, but he laughs again and stands up. “I think they'd call that a taste of your own medicine, sweetheart,” he says to you. 
You meet Spencer's eye. “I think they would,” you say bashfully. 
For three blissful seconds, Spencer enjoys the reality of having made you flustered. You, gorgeous, confident you, left flushed and a little daunted by his casual actions and simple (maybe slightly flirtatious) questioning. But then he remembers how much he likes you and pushes it away. 
“Sorry,” he says, plastering a smile over uncertain lips, “I didn't mean to do that.” 
“No, it's okay.” 
He turns to your notes, but gives you a look from the side. “I hope you wished for someone to solve the case. We're never getting anywhere like this.” 
“Are you saying you can't?” You rest your chin in your hand. “And here I thought you were more than a pretty face.” 
You have a quick recovery rate, evidently. 
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xhoneygirlxx · 8 months
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Watermelon Sugar
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Eddie Munson x Fem Reader
summary: Eddie shows you the eight wonder of the world. his mouth.
warnings: reader and eddie are 18+, established relationship, fluff, Eddie being a munch. nicknames/pet names used (baby, honey, sweetheart, etc.) MINORS DNI 18+ smut: fem oral receiving, blowjobs mentioned, talks of past sexual experiences, praise/body worship, swearing. *Skin Color/Ethnicity not mentioned! not proofread, spelling errors and horrible writing.
if I miss anything plz lmk!
a/n: hello my loves! thank you all for the kind words and reactions on my last couple of posts! as you all know smut is not my forte but I felt the need to write this. am I projecting??? maybe but we’re gonna pretend that i'm not :)
The low hum of Steve Nicks’ voice plays through Eddie’s room, the soundtrack of your makeout session with your boyfriend. Orange glow from the late afternoon sun comes through the window, an angelic glow casting around the frizz of the mentalhead’s hair.
It started as an innocent day, hanging out together in a comfortable silence in his room. Him doodling in his notebook and you flipping through one of his old comic books. Somewhere along the way a featherlight touch turned into shared giggles, sitting in his lap turned into a chaste kiss, and it ended up with him in between your parted knees, kissing like his life depended on it.
A curtain of curls block out the skylight, tender lips on yours like melted honey, and big hands roaming down the expanse of your body. When Eddie moves away from your mouth, he takes the oxygen from your lungs with him and you whimper at the loss.
"Gonna let me have a taste of you, pretty girl?" Big doe eyes shine down to you, way too eager and excited. Your stomach twists into knots, the training you put yourself through in case of this moment, has all been for nothing. What do you say to the man that hovers over you with so much love in his eyes?
"How about I suck you off instead, hmm?" You try to come off as sensual but instead you sound scared.
It's an offer that you've made so many times over the short course of your relationship with Eddie. This was your first real relationship besides the eight grade love affair you had with Simon Willard. That only lasted a week.
You weren't anywhere near a virgin, that so called sacred part of yourself is now in the possession of a random boy you met on vacation before your senior year. Hookups weren't uncommon to you but what was uncommon to you was the affection you received during the sex.
People you've hooked up with never really cared to get you nice and ready the way Eddie does, prepping you with two or more fingers, working you open so that it doesn't hurt going in. Guys didn't care if you got off or not, they were just looking for a hole to fill and someone who wouldn't get clingy.
You had guy friends, including Eddie before you started dating, and you heard the horror stories they had of going down on a girl. It was never in mean spirit, although the discussion should've stayed in the bedroom, but it still scared you shitless. How one girl didn't properly take care of herself, causing the smell to be rancid. This girl didn't wipe the right way, leaving scraps of toilet paper down there. And the one that really settled itself into your brain, was how good or bad a girl tasted.
Of course you, and all of your guy friends, knew that girls didn't taste like ice cream, or strawberries, or candy. It was made up, another bullshit beauty standard for woman to worry about.
You had paid attention to the way guys would ask you if you wanted it done. The way they would sigh and roll their eyes like it was the biggest task of their lives. You would end up telling them that you're more of a giver than receiver, and that you just weren't interested in that whole thing. When they would release a breath of relief you would fill with shame, almost like you were the one who requested it to be done and had been turned down. The embarrassment of rejection you didn't even ask for.
So when you and Eddie first had sex as boyfriend and girlfriend, you made it your mission to never let that horrid question come from his mouth. You always made sure to offer him head first, and if it looked like he was about to ask, you'd simply tell him you couldn't wait anymore.
Now here you are, under him, ready and willing to take him in your mouth, and he's gotten the question out before you could beat him to the punch.
"Ya know I will never say no to that, sweetheart. But-"
Uh oh. That's the word that comes before a life or death sentence. It's hanging heavy over you, the once comfortable silence is now killing you. Squeezing all of the air out of your body, limbs going numb with the loss of circulation, all the while your ears ring like an explosion has gone off.
"I want to return the favor." It's so sincere when he says it and it makes you want to cry. A boyish smile taking over his mouth, deep dimples appearing on the fat of his cheeks.
You must look like you've seen a ghost because the pretty smile that was written on his face is now taken over by worry.
"I mean, I don't have to. It's just- I feel like," Eddie's a panicked mess, backing his face further away from your own. The small bubble of love that the two of you created has now been popped with your own doubts and fears.
"I don't want to make you uncomfortable, I just thought I could make you feel good s'all." The confident man that you know all too well is now reduced to a fumbling and anxious person. His fingers work at the chunky silver ring on his finger, twisting and twisting and twisting it around.
"You just always, I don't know. It just always seems like you never ask for head and I just wanted to offer it to you, I guess."
The whiskey eyes that never left your gaze won't even look at you anymore. Focusing on that damn ring that goes faster and faster the longer you wait to respond. You want to run and hide. Dig a deep hole and never come out. Your lovely boyfriend who's done nothing but treat you like the queen of the goddamn universe, now thinks he's made you uncomfortable.
Embarrassment rushes through your veins, throat closing with the grip of shame making it harder to breathe. Tears prick your eyes, hot and heavy, ready to fall at the drop of a dime. You feel so guilty for not just telling him the truth, for not saying all the concerns that you had. Even before you started dating Eddie always confided in you, telling you the deepest secrets that kept him up at night and you couldn't even tell him this one thing.
"I'm embarrassed." It comes out in a sniffle, lip wobbling beneath the teeth that hold it down, trying to make it go away.
"I'm just embarrassed I won't be good. That I'll be another conversation for you and the boys to drink to. Will I taste good? Do I smell weird? Does it look pretty? All of these questions circle my brain and I'm so fucking scared that you won't like me anymore." It comes out like word vomit, so fast and uneven in tone that you're not sure if it even made sense.
You don't have time to think it over anyway, Eddie's too quick putting his hands on your cheeks, gently making you look up at him. The same kind eyes that you always see meet yours. Thumbs gentle swipe the fat tears off of your face, his cold hands extinguish the flames of your skin.
"Honey, I promise you I would never, ever do some dumb shit like that. What the guys and I talk about is irrelevant, half the time they don't even know what they're talking about. I felt the same way when you wanted to suck me off the first time, every single question you ask yourself is what I ask myself." Eddie's eyes are searching yours, looking and waiting to see the dread leave your head.
"Like I said before, I would never want you to be uncomfortable but if you're okay with it, I'd really," He places a gentle kiss on your forehead, "really," he continues to place more delicate kisses around your face, "really love to make you feel so fucking good."
When he's done, he looks back down to you with a dopey smile, he's low and hazy drunk off of you. A smile tugs on your own lips, so warm and fuzzy off of him. You know he means it and you feel sad that you even questioned him. Childish laughter rings out between the two of you when he pinches your sides, tickling out the stiffness in your body.
When the laughter dies down, he asks you again by cocking his eyebrow up in question. Nodding your head, you give him a confident yes, something you didn't feel the first time he asked.
Moving down your body, trails of kisses are left on your skin, mapping out his journey to your center. When he reaches the hem of your pants, he looks up to you once more waiting for a reply. Encouraging him to go further, his chilled fingers douses the warmth radiating off of you.
Leaving you only in your polka dot designed panties, Eddie teases you by running his fingers up and down your thighs.
"I gotta say bub, I love the pink dots. Top notch fashion if I don't say so myself." Eddie jokes and it makes you giggle. Swatting lightly at him, he returns the laughter.
"I'm not lying, I swear! If only you know what you do to me." As much of a joker Eddie is, he was never one to joke about your beauty. He found everything you did, said, and wore so fucking breathtaking and flawless, he'd probably get hard from the sight of you in a Tin Man costume.
"If you, at any time, want me to stop just tell me. I won't get mad, just let me know, okay?" Eyebrows scrunched with seriousness, Eddie makes sure to be loud and clear with his instructions.
"I promise, Eds." You say and he takes that as the green light.
Eddie's index finger teases your cloth slit, running up and down so slowly it feels like torture. When you lift your hips looking for more friction he snorts lightly.
"Patience, my love." His fingers continue to dance over your panties, running back to the top of the band and pulling them down in a swift motion.
When the cool air hits your wet seat, you whimper slightly at the feeling. Eddie has seen your pussy multiple times, but when he spreads it with his fingers, you can't help but feel shy, closing your legs around his arm.
"Don't go shy on me, baby. I just wanna see the prettiest picture I've ever seen." His eyes are still trained on the glistening of your sex, glimmering like bright pools of water.
It feels like an hour of no movement from Eddie before he goes to change his position between your legs. Shuffling back on his knees, he picks your thighs up to place on his shoulders as he lays on his stomach.
Still having doubts, you lean up on your elbows, watching your boyfriend to see what his reaction is. To your surprise, he looks like a kid in a candy store, awe and wonder swimming around in the big brown pools of his eyes.
When an obscene sniff rings through the air, you can't help but cringe a little. Waiting for him to look repulsed, you're again astonished when all your met with is a feral look.
Very tentatively, he runs his flat tongue from your hole to the top of your clit. Moaning deeply, he moves his gave up to you. A smirk breaks out on his features, so devilishly and mischievously.
"Oh baby, you have no fucking clue how good you taste." There is no questioning in his cadence. It's smug and cocky and it makes you shiver with need.
Repeating his motions from before, you mewl at the feeling, lifting your hips again. The chuckle that comes from Eddie vibrates off of you, make you move you squirm. Reaching his strong hands around your thighs, he holds you in place with his firm grip.
When the wet muscle breaches your needy hole, you fall back onto the bed moaning out in pleasure. He works your open with it, flicking it in and out efficiently.
Pulling out of you, he moves up to your bundle of nerves. Starting slowly, he circles around once or twice, before working it in figure eights.
You melt into the bed like a popsicle on a hot summers day. There's not a single thought in your head other than the feeling of his mouth. You're a livewire come to life, so sensitive and lost in the haze of pleasure.
You think this is the precipice of ecstasy but then one of his thick fingers enter you and his mouth sucks hard on your pulsing clit.
It feels like fireworks on the fourth of July, bright and explosive, big loud bangs ringing out into the night sky. It's like the feeling of going down the big drop on a rollercoaster, tingling deep in your belly and a rush of adrenaline pumping through your veins. It's like winning first place, heartwarming and shocking all at the same time.
You feel all these things at the same time, every single one of them caused by the actions of your boyfriends mouth. It's overwhelming and so fucking delicious but you can't say anything than cry out in bliss.
Letting go of your clit with a pop, Eddie's head pokes up at you like an excited puppy. "S'it feel good baby?" You want to answer, you really do but the way he sneaks a second finger into you and crooks them at the perfect angle makes you lose all motor skills.
"Awe, honey" he coos mockingly, "Is it that good?"
"S'good Eds, so good." You're a blubbering, crying mess. So hooked on the feeling of him, hooking on the feeling of how he made you feel.
He doesn't say anything else, too busy pushing his face back between your legs. His motions go faster, fingers hitting that sweet spot inside of you that he only managed to find, his mouth switching between motions, driving you closer to the edge as he does.
The string in your belly is pulling tighter and tighter, barley hanging together by a thread. You're a thrashing, sweaty mess on his bed, gripping the pillow underneath your head that your knuckles will probably be stuck in that position. You don't care, not when he's moving his head back and forth, slurping up your wetness like a handmade milkshake.
It's filthy, down right dirty the way it sounds. The noises that carry out into his room echo so loud the neighbors could probably hear. The squelch of your wetness being pounded into by his hand, the way he's drinking you up like a dehydrated plant, the moans that escape out of your parted lips.
"Eddie, please. FUCK, please." You're blathering at him, not even sure at what you're asking for.
Separating himself from you again, he continues working his fingers deep into you.
"You wanna cum, pretty girl? S'that it? Wanna cum all over my fingers?" You moan louder in response, clenching around him harder as you do.
"Go ahead, be a good good and cum for me. Come on, honey. Cum for me." That's all you need to hear before you're hurtling off the edge of your release.
You release with a silent cry, all the air being punched right out of you. Your body feels weightless, like you were thrown up into the clouds and not being able to come down.
Your whole body shakes, tears streaming down your face, all while your hole pulses and quivers around Eddie's fingers. A gush of wetness coats his fingers, a big puddle under your ass, leaving another stain on his bed seats.
He watches in awe as you hit your peak, how your back arches off of the bed and how you look so fucking perfect like this. The shy girl that never got experience this kind joy, now swims in the ocean of euphoria of the climax. He feels so lucky to witness this, to be the first and last person to ever see you this vulnerable.
Eddie wishes he could paint this moment, make a portrait of the way your kiss bitten lips form the perfect O, make the brushstrokes of your hair and some of it sticks to your sweaty face. You're so beautiful and he doesn't know how blessed to be yours.
When you float back down to earth, to the springy mattress of Eddie's, you take a moment to catch your breath. When he removes his fingers from you, you weakly hiss from movement and he offers a quiet sorry.
Moving back up to his knees, he hovers over you and smiles brightly down at you. Smiling weakly back at you, he uses the hand that's not supporting his weight to place it on your jaw. His thumb brushes back and forth and you melt right into it.
"How was that?" Pink tints his cheeks, grinning ear to ear.
You chuckle weakly, shaking your head in disbelief.
"I think I went to outer space for a second there."
A booming laugh leaves his chest and it makes you smile even harder. Your heart feels so full and so happy. You're so in love with him and it makes you delirious. You want to see him like this for the rest of your life, big smiles and even big laughter, so pretty and delicate only for you.
"Well I'm glad you enjoyed yourself there, space cadet." Leaning down to press his lips to yours, your soak in the feeling of it. When he moves away you pout at him, and he bops you on the nose with his finger.
"I was thinkin' I could return the favor, big boy." You whisper seductively.
"Oh baby, that sounds wonderful but-," He makes eye contact with you, "I need to be in you like yesterday because that, right there was the hottest thing I've ever witness."
"I happen to be a romantic. So I shall wait until my fair maiden is okay to resume our activities." Closing his eyes with pride, he places a hand on his heart.
Hiding your face with your hands, you bust out laughing at his little antics and when you peek between his fingers you see his teeth flashing back at you. Removing your hands from your face, you tuck a loose tendril behind his ear.
"You're a dork, but that sounds good to me."
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Thank you all for reading! I loves you all and hope you enjoyed!!!
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mrs-kmikaelson · 8 months
Text
Braver Together
(Should've Known Better Part Two)
Pairing: Kol Mikaelson x reader, Klaus Mikaelson x reader, Mikaelsons x sister-in-law!reader, Hope Mikaelson x mother-figure!reader Summary: Ever since your heart was broken, you became scared of love altogether, but then the most unexpected thing happens and you realize that there was no point in being alive if you weren't living. So you force yourself to face your fears and start being brave... with some help, of course. Warnings: very long, mentions of cheating, angst (with more fluff tho imo), complicated relationships, death, ofc violence, and i totally bend the tvd-originals timeline Words: 10.6K
Masterlist
a/n is at the end of the post.
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When you accepted Klaus’ proposal a thousand years ago, you could’ve never imagined that your life would end up the way it would. For a long time, you were happy, maybe even the happiest girl in the world. It didn’t matter if your family was dead—the Mikaelsons became your family. And for a while, that was fine with you, but now it just felt like torture to be with them every single day.
But you supposed that you signed your life away when you married your husband.
His infractions amazed you, but you still didn’t leave him, even when every bone in your body begged you to. It was the little things, like watching Hope smile as she opened presents on Christmas morning, that made you feel like it was worth it.
You had grown attached to her. While you still weren’t the best of friends with her mother, you remained civil for her. After all, you were both stuck in this family with no way of escaping, so you found it pointless to continue to ignore her.
Klaus, however, was much more deserving of your ignorance, but like Hayley, you pushed that to the side. Your feelings didn’t matter when their child was involved. Even though you weren’t her mother, Hope felt like a daughter to you. Her name was so fitting; she really was this family’s last hope, and she was definitely yours.
Over the years you had, you managed to mend your relationship with Rebekah, even if it was never really the same as it was before. You were no longer running around Chicago together, dancing the night away, but now you had responsibilities to care for and hurt in your hearts. Rebekah had always been a child of sorts, but coming back to this city forced her to grow up. In a way, you supposed you did, too.
Elijah and you were better after that talk you had that one Christmas Eve, not as good as before, but better, and for the time being, that was good enough.
Sometimes, as you were playing with Hope in the living room, your siblings surrounding you, you lied to yourself and pretended you were a family again. But you knew better now. You’d been here before already.
But then something happened, something that almost made that lie feel real.
You walked into the Abattoir with a wide smile on your face, a sight that’d become rare to see. But when you were with Hope, it was impossible for the corners of your lips not to go up. She was giggling at something you said, but, looking back, you couldn’t even remember what it was.
There were shopping bags in your hands. You just took her out to get clothes for her first time at school. You were expecting to see the family seated on the couches, prepared to watch her “runway” her new wardrobe.
Instead, you were met with an apparent crisis. Rebekah sat on the couch, hand cupped over her mouth in shock, tears in her eyes. Hayley stood off to the side, glancing in between Elijah and Klaus, the former staring pointedly at an unknown man whose back was turned to you and the latter with his arms crossed, also staring at said man.
At your entrance, Hayley looked over to you, seeming to let out a breath, as if she was thankful to have a reason to leave the situation. “Mommy, mommy!” Little Hope waved Hayley over, even though she was already walking in your direction. “Me and Auntie Y/N/N bought pretty clothes! Wanna see?”
“Yes, sweetheart, just after your father and Uncle Elijah work this out.” She picked the child up, glancing your way with a sort of warning in her eyes, nodding over to where the rest of the family stood before she looked back to Hope. “For now, why don’t we get you in the bath?”
Hope groaned in protest, making you smile in amusement, but Hayley paid no mind to this, taking her upstairs. Your smile was immediately wiped away. The look the werewolf gave you suggested that something was going on, something she didn’t want Hope to be apart of. The rest of the Mikaelsons hadn’t taken their attention off the man they were staring at for even a second, worrying you.
So, you placed the shopping bags you were holding down next to the gate, walking towards them with your arms held out. “What’s going on?” You asked, but no one turned to answer you. Your brows furrowed. Just as you were about to ask again, the mystery man turned around and it was like the wind was knocked out of you instantly.
Standing right in front of you was no stranger. It was Kol Mikaelson.
For a moment, you almost forgot how to breathe. He gazed at you tenderly with an indecipherable look in his eye. Before you could get to even trying to figure it out, you jumped out of your shock and engulfed him into a tight hug that he quickly reciprocated. Tears leaked out of your eyes for the first time in years.
After a minute, you pulled away, patting his arms and looking him up and down, like you were trying to figure out if he was real. He looked just like Kol, just like your Kol. You pinched yourself, causing the man to let out a small chuckle.
“Oh, how I’ve missed you, Y/N,” he said, and you were gobsmacked because that was his voice, his voice that you hadn’t heard in years. As you realized this was real, that this was really Kol, you pulled him in for another hug. 
Kol was the one to pull away this time, cupping your cheeks with his hands and wiping your tears away. You opened and closed your mouth like a fish, trying to find the right words to use, trying to figure out what you even wanted to say. When he died, you felt like there was so much left unsaid, but now you didn’t know where to start. “How- how are you here?”
He softly smiled at you, so different in comparison to the usual Mikaelson smirk that you were used to. “I’m going to explain everything.”
All of a sudden, you heard a throat clear, reminding you of the others in the room that you’d somehow forgotten about. You looked behind Kol to see Elijah, straightening his cufflinks. “Yes, it appears that we all have a lot to discuss,” he remarked, almost looking uncomfortable. You then glanced to Klaus whose jaw was clenched. Rebekah was still in the same exact position as before, expressionless.
Kol guided you to the couch next to her, telling the brothers they should sit, too. And then he told you all the story of a lifetime.
You listened intently as Kol explained how he was alive. He said he had been on the other side, watching all of you every day. Hearing this made you tense as you wondered what he could’ve possibly seen or heard; you were embarrassed that he might’ve seen how Klaus treated you and how you stayed, but your mind didn’t linger on the subject for long as he continued with his story.
He said the other side started to fall apart, all thanks to the travellers and their sociopathic leader, Markos. You were surprised he was even real; when you came across travellers in the past, you thought they were insane, but it turned out that they actually had real power, enough to bring down a supernatural purgatory that had existed long before even your time.
Kol then said he went back to Mystic Falls after a witch told him that Bonnie Bennett had taken the place of the other side’s anchor. He explained how, following Stefan’s death, the scooby gang engaged in a plan to bring him and their other fallen friends back. 
“So I was stuck with my life in the witch’s hands.” He suddenly looked to you. “She refused at first, but when I mentioned you, she eased up and decided to let me through.” For some reason, this information made you freeze. You were stuck staring into Kol’s eyes until he eventually looked away, making you shake your head. “Whatever you said to her, Y/N, may have just saved my life.”
You knew what he was referring to. Long ago, when you were still in Mystic Falls, before Klaus cheated and before Kol died, you gave the Bennett witch some advice you thought she’d find useful. You told her not to let people walk all over her, to start living for herself.
How ironic was that?
It seemed that neither of you had followed this advice, though, because Bonnie was still stuck putting her life on the line for her friends and you still lived with your husband and his family.
Both of you were doing things that’d kill you eventually.
Maybe it already did.
After Kol’s story, you were all worn out, like each of you had lived through it yourselves. Even though you were exhausted, you were still ecstatic that Kol was alive, that your wishes had come true. When Rebekah got over her shock, you could tell she was happy too, and even Elijah had a ghost of a smile of his lips. But Klaus didn’t look as happy as you would’ve thought he’d be.
You didn’t mind this, ignoring it altogether, refusing to let anything ruin your good mood. That night, you went to bed happy in a house full of Mikaelsons.
The next day, when Kol met Hope, the smile that was already on your face got even wider. Oh, they would cause trouble together, you thought. The three of you spent the week together, sometimes including one of your other siblings. And for the first time since you were with that boy, you felt human again.
You could’ve never imagined this turn of events, Kol coming back to life, Klaus’ child being your salvation. But no longer could you imagine any what ifs, any other life for yourself. You didn’t wonder and wonder about what would’ve happened if Elijah let you go, if Klaus never found you. If you got the chance to go back, you didn’t even know if you would’ve done it all differently. That was saying something, but at the moment, it all felt like it was worth it.
There were so many questions you had for Kol, so many qualms you still had with your family, but for that week, you ignored it all. You could only focus on the influx of pure happiness you felt. You started living like you weren’t a thousand-year-old Original whose heart was broken and like you were gonna die the very next day.
And it was liberating.
But you knew better than to think you could live in paradise forever.
You and Kol lied on the grass of some hill he’d driven you to. You were surprised he even still knew his way around the city, but he was always one to surprise you.
You just stared up at the stars together in silence, a comfortable silence that didn’t feel like it was suffocating you. It was just the two of you, no Klaus, no drama, no anyone. It was just you and the stars.
Out of nowhere, Kol broke the silence, his voice just above a whisper. “My brother doesn’t deserve you.”
Your breath hitched, turning your head towards him, but his gaze was still aimed at the sky. Your perfect little moment was suddenly invaded by the thought of your husband who you’d been unknowingly avoiding in conversation with Kol altogether. Maybe he noticed that.
Maybe he noticed the way you and Klaus no longer touched, even though you couldn’t keep your hands off one another the last time he was alive. Maybe he really was watching you from the other side, and that terrified you.
You knew Kol held you on a pedestal, even if neither of you would ever acknowledge that. He thought you were so good, so strong, so it killed you to think that he saw you when you were most vulnerable. It killed you to think that he knew all of his brother’s indiscretions and how you stayed, anyway.
You knew better than that—no, you were better than that.
Kol went on, “He never has-”
This time, you cut him off, the shock wearing off. “Kol-”
“No, Y/N.” He finally stopped staring up at the stars, turning to look at you. You were expecting the disappointment, but you weren’t expecting the raw anger in his eyes, an anger that’d never been directed at you. But you know it wasn’t. “You were always too good for that bastard, too good for this entire fucking family.”
You tried to stop him, but he kept going every time you opened your mouth. “Here you are, raising a child that isn’t even yours for his sake. Even after what he did to you, what he kept doing to you, you stayed—because that is just how loyal you are and how loyal he isn’t.” He started laughing, but there was no trace of humour in it. “You have no idea how much I want to sock him every time I see him.”
“Kol-”
“You know there’s nothing you can say to make this better, Y/N.” That shut you up. “I’m not going to let you spin this just to spare my brother the trouble.” Oh, how embarrassed you felt. Klaus cheated on you over and over again, yet you still felt the need to defend him. 
Things were okay with Elijah and Rebekah because, even though they were there, they weren’t really there. They didn’t know how bad things were between you and Klaus, how it ate you alive, not even Rebekah who watched you break down and isolate yourself. But Kol- oh, Kol saw it all.
You swallowed, looking back up to the sky. “I’m sorry,” you whispered.
Never had you been turned so fast. When your eyes met Kol’s, they were fierce, but his voice softened. “Don’t ever apologize for him. Never again, not to me- not to anyone.”
You swallowed a second time, losing your words as you just stared into his eyes. You hadn’t seen him in so long; you forgot how well he knew you, how he was able to read you like a child’s book.
But Kol had gotten more complicated to you. Whenever you were around him, there was a new look that’d surface in his eyes. This look was like a passerby that you didn’t know but had seen before, a friend of a friend. This was a look you could not decipher, and currently, he was giving you that exact look.
For a long while, the two of you just looked at each other as if you were the stars you’d came all this way to see. The only things heard were crickets and the cars from the city until Kol’s voice sounded.
“I should’ve never let him do this to you,” he said. And you didn’t know what that meant.
But it didn’t matter.
Because, seconds later, you both got up and drove away.
This night hadn’t dampened your mood. There were so many things to be happy for. Years ago or even a week ago, you were depressed beyond words, but Kol coming back had filled a hole you’d thought would never go away. So even though this conversation stung, you were still okay.
When you got back to the compound, you both pretended he never said what he said. Kol went back to being his playful self, making jokes, and you went back to laughing at them.
It was like you’d been given a miracle. You never thought you’d feel like yourself again, and you didn’t really, but it was so close, as close as you’d been in a long time. 
You didn’t feel so alone anymore.
Every day started being spent with either Kol, Marcel, Hope, or sometimes even Rebekah. Life was as normal as it had ever been, as sunny as you’d ever seen the world—at least as sunny as your life has been in decades.
Until it started to rain.
You were in the kitchen of the Abattoir, looking through the cupboards to see what you could make. While none of you had to actually eat, Hope did, and so it’d become a staple in the Mikaelson house to have dinner every night. These dinners stopped being so awkward after a while.
Hayley and Eijah were at some werewolf meeting, Rebekah had taken Hope to buy school supplies, Kol was roaming around, and you suspected Klaus was out causing some sort of mayhem. You assumed you were alone in the house, but you were proven wrong.
Footsteps sounded behind you; you sensed him before you even turned around. Even though Klaus and you had gotten to a point of pleasantness, that didn’t mean you enjoyed being alone with him. 
A few years of pleasantness couldn’t erase the thousand years you’d spent together.
“Love,” he greeted, pulling out a barstool and sitting down, the kitchen island separating you. You lightly inhaled, turning to nod to him in acknowledgement.
You kept rummaging through the kitchen, trying your best to ignore your husband’s presence. Oh, Klaus hadn’t felt like your husband in so long, but what else could he possibly be to you?
You were trying so hard to be friends with him, but could you really be friends with the man you were in love with for a millennium? With the man who had hurt you more than anyone else ever had? You didn’t have an answer to that.
The two of you sat in silence. There was a point in time where silence between you both felt like a warm blanket, comfortable and safe, but now it felt ominous, like the calm before a storm. With Klaus, there was always a storm.
Just as you placed your final ingredients on the counter, he caught you off guard and asked, “What are you doing with my brother?” You quickly spun around, widening your eyes and narrowing them in the same sequence. This was a question, but it felt much more like a challenge.
Klaus was impassive, but you knew better than to actually believe that. However, you mirrored his expression, anyway. “What do you mean?” you quizzed. You tried to keep your voice devoid of emotion, but you couldn’t help the bite of annoyance that seeped through.
He clearly noticed this if the tick in his jaw was of any indication. “You and Kol, Y/N.” Your brows furrowed at his vague explanation, causing his eyes to roll. “Come on, don’t act as if you’re surprised. You had to have known that I’d ask eventually. You’re my wife.”
He stared firmly into your eyes. No, I’m not your wife, you wanted to scream, but you bit your tongue. You hoped that your gaze said it for you, anyway. Instead, you scoffed, “No, Klaus, I really don’t know what you’re talking about.” He tried to say something, but you cut him off. “I’m not sure what insinuation you’re trying to make, but you need to cool it.”
You were fed up, and you could feel an argument on its way. Klaus and you hadn’t argued in a long time, but that didn’t mean you didn’t have things you wanted to say to him. You held your comments in for Hope’s sake, but if he wanted to poke the bear, then you’d make sure that the bear poked back.
This time, he scoffed, his calm façade falling apart as he snarked, “Oh, please, you can’t possibly be so naive.”
“There is nothing to be naive about, Klaus—there’s nothing going on between your brother and me.” And if there was, it wouldn’t be your business, you wanted to add, but you weren’t gonna add more fuel to the fire. You didn’t even know why your mind went there in the first place.
“Perhaps that’s what you think, Y/N, but I’ve seen the way my brother looks at you-”
“He doesn’t look at me in any way.”
“Yes, he does- and you’re fooling yourself if you think he doesn’t.”
There was a door in your mind that Klaus had opened with these remarks, a door you’d been scared to even go near. But you closed it right away, refusing to wonder about it. He was wrong. There was nothing going on between you and Kol.
Your eyes hardened and you snapped, “I don’t have the time nor do I have the patience to deal with another one of your paranoid episodes.” He scoffed again, but you paid it no mind. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have dinner to make.” You turned around, not caring to see Klaus’ expression. You heard the barstool screech against the floor and then his angry footsteps as he left the kitchen.
And just like that, that opened door was slammed shut.
You tried your hardest to ignore Klaus’ words, telling yourself it wasn’t true, that there was no way it could possibly be true, but you couldn’t stop thinking about it. You and Kol had always been close, but there was nothing that wasn’t platonic there. 
Or maybe you were wrong.
You had given up on love so long ago. You gave your lover your heart without a second thought and he threw it to the ground like it was nothing, like it wouldn’t shatter everywhere, like it was possible for you to ever recover from that. And then when you try and find happiness, he rips that away from you, too.
Klaus had blown out any spark you had, leaving you alone in the dark.
Was love worth it if felt like this?
You didn’t know. These weren’t questions you asked yourself when you said “I do.” You didn’t know what to do anymore.
So you did what you always did, stuffing your feelings away and acting like nothing was wrong. But something changed. Whenever you saw Kol after that, you felt something—something you couldn’t explain, something you couldn’t name. It was like you had felt this before, but just never noticed it.
This feeling lurked in the background for a while until it was pulled back to the forefront of your mind when you least expected it.
“Bloody hell,” you muttered, storming into the compound with Kol following soon after. Your language was partly ironic because bloody you were. Of course, not your blood, but you hadn’t been in this state in at least a century.
Safe to say, you didn’t miss it.
You had just killed a horde of witches. They were good opponents, strong, but nobody was ever really smart if they decided to go up against the Mikaelsons. Nothing was stronger than family, even if it didn’t always feel that way.
They wanted to go after Hope, but you would never let that happen—none of you would. So you killed them- slaughtered may have even been a better word to use. Some of them had their hearts taken, their limbs ripped apart, stakes stabbed into their chests; your family could get creative.
Elijah, Hayley, and Klaus were dealing with the mess while Rebekah was tending to Hope. They didn’t need anymore man-power, so Elijah told you both to go home and clean yourselves up. He didn’t have to tell you twice.
“Seems that this family can never escape a bloodbath,” he joked.
“Ugh, disgusting. I need a real bath.” You spun around, a dramatic look on your face. Kol chuckled. He was more at ease than you were; he got a meal out of it, but you preferred quick kills, so now you were just annoyed.
“If you weren’t my brother’s wife, I’d join you.” His tone was light and playful, teasing even, but there was a glint in his eye that made you think he wasn’t completely joking. Your mind went back to what Klaus said to you, about the way Kol looked at you, then you thought about everything he did to you, how he just discarded your vows like they were meaningless. 
Maybe, if you hadn’t just come from a fight, you would’ve laughed it off, but you were tired of thinking about what Klaus wanted. 
You shrugged. “Well, I don’t think I’ve been his wife for a long time now.” You maintained eye contact with Kol as he paused. The playful atmosphere disappeared and was replaced with tension.
A beat passed before he slowly responded, “Y/N, what are you trying to say?”
What were you trying to say? You didn’t know if you could put it into words. So you stepped forward, hearing his breath catch in his throat, putting a hand on his bicep. “I think you know what I’m trying to say.”
Another beat. And then the next thing you knew, Kol’s lips slammed onto yours. You were sped upstairs, immediately ripping his shirt off and letting it fall to the floor. Yours came off somewhere in the mix. You could taste the leftover blood on his lips, not enough to satisfy you, but just enough to leave you wanting more.
You didn’t know what you were doing, but it felt good. You never thought you’d feel anything remotely like this ever again, but now that you had it, who knew if you could ever let it go?
Kissing Kol was like drugs. Ecstasy raced through your veins. You didn’t know if you had ever felt anything like this before; if you had, then how was it possible that you let it slip through your fingers? No, this was unlike any experience you’d ever had.
He suddenly pulled away, heaving. You reached to pull him back in, but he stopped you, breathing, “Are you sure that you want this?”
You didn’t even have to think about it. “Yes- you have no idea how badly.” This clearly sufficed because he was back to kissing you the second you stopped talking, hands going to unclasp your bra.
Oh, at that moment, you couldn’t give a damn what Klaus thought.
And Kol made sure you didn’t think about Klaus for the rest of that night.
Kol made it feel like your first time all over again, like everything you felt was new and foreign to you, but by the time you were done, your body was anything but foreign to him. 
After multiple rounds and showering, you laid in your bed tired. You couldn’t remember the last time someone else laid with you. Part of you thought that, for some reason, Kol would leave, but he stayed right next to you, holding you in his arms.
You only had sex, but this felt like so much more than that.
The only thing that could be heard in your room was the sound of your breathing. You didn’t want to say anything, to talk about it and be reminded that you were married. You just wanted to bask in this moment.
You don’t know how long you’d been lying in silence before Kol whispered, “You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that.” You turned your head toward him, but like that night on the hill, he kept his vision directed to the ceiling as if he was afraid what he’d see if he directed it to you. He hesitated. “I think I’ve felt something for you for years, centuries. Maybe- maybe I always have.”
Your heart nearly stopped. Not just because he was confessing to having feelings for you, but because maybe you did, too. But this was more than a confession.
Your response to this could determine your future, if there was any, with Kol. 
The rational part of your brain argued that this could never work, that Klaus would never let it happen, that this would only end in tragedy. You wanted to stop this before it became something more, but that other part of yourself, the part ruled by her heart, told you that it was too late for that. This was already something more.
You couldn’t let this go, not even if you wanted to.
You cupped his cheek, turning him to you. When his eyes met yours, you saw an emotion that Kol rarely ever showed, and that was fear. You wondered if he could see that you were scared, too.
You looked into his eyes for what felt like forever but was really only a minute. And then you decided that what you were feeling was more powerful than words, so you didn’t say anything at all, leaning in to kiss him. It wasn’t as fervent as before, now tender and soft but still with purpose. You weren’t too sure of what’d happen after this, once you woke up from this dream and got back to reality, but as you kissed him, it didn’t matter.
You were together. 
And for now, that was more than enough.
When you woke up, Kol was still there, right next to you. You could’ve stayed in bed together all day, but you weren’t normal people. You belonged to the least normal family and led the least normal lives. So you got up, reluctantly, and he went back to his room before anyone could find him in yours.
Then you walked downstairs, ate breakfast, and dealt with the effects of the your most recent problem. You were at Rousseau’s, about to meet with Marcel, when you were pulled into the bathroom, Kol’s lips immediately meeting yours.
The feeling of his lips soon became so familiar to you.
You wanted to be normal so badly, but you couldn’t. You knew you couldn’t. So this became your new normal instead: stolen moments and glances, being together when no one else was around. 
Slowly, that feeling you had whenever you were around him was given a name. You don’t know if it was love, if it could even be that yet—but it felt dangerous, and exciting, and warm all at once. You felt it whenever you kissed him, whenever you looked into his dark brown eyes, and whenever he smiled. 
You were falling for Kol Mikaelson.
You constantly berated yourself, even though it felt so good. This was like alcohol, and drugs, and every other vice out there: it was temporary. The Original Hybrid was your husband—this was his brother. He wouldn’t let this happen.
This was wrong.
But it felt so right.
You had rejected every possible opportunity of happiness for years. Couldn’t you just have this one thing? Couldn’t you just let yourself be happy?
Oh, Kol made you happy. He brought out a part of you that you thought was gonna be gone forever. He made you feel like yourself again, like you were alive, like you had something to live for.
You had been living in black and white for so long that you forgot what it was like to live in colour.
Music filled the Mikaelson living room, music that the rest of the world would perhaps call old but never got old to you. Kol held you close to him, rocking you to the rhythm while your head rested on his chest. You were both very well versed in classical dances, but you didn’t need a big fancy dance for this to feel the way it did: special.
There was something going on—there always was—but, at that moment, that something didn’t exist. At that moment, it was just the two of you.
A small smile came to your lips. “You know, you weren’t even actually alive when this song came out.”
You felt his chest rumble as he chuckled. “Yeah, and I’m glad. This song is terrible.”
You gasped, pulling away and hitting his arm. “Kol Mikaelson! Don’t you dare speak about Celine Dion that way.”
He laughed again, easily pulling you back to him and kissing the crown of your head. You tried pouting, but it felt impossible to do anything other than smile. “Don’t worry, darling. You like it, so I like it.” Your smile got wider, pulling back again but this time it was to kiss him.
You found that, when you kissed Kol, it wasn’t always so hot and heavy. It didn’t always lead to making out or making love. Sometimes, you just kissed because it felt good. It was soft, and gentle, and reassuring, and it felt good.
Maybe, if you were being honest with yourself, it felt better than anything else.
You pulled away after a few seconds, taking the time to stare into his eyes. You did it all the time and yet, every single time you did, it felt like the first time all over again. You could stare into his brown orbs all day long if you could. However, your lives didn’t allow for that.
But that just made little moments like these all the more special.
After a few seconds, he directed your attention away from his eyes, mumbling under his breath, “The song’s still shit, though.”
“Oh, shut up,” you scolded, but your head still made its way back to his chest, anyways.
Everyone else was back at the benefit. You were there, too, until you both decided to sneak away and go back home. That was cutting it close, definitely, but you couldn’t find it in you to care. You didn’t get to go on dates or hold hands in public, so you were gonna grab these moments while you still could.
You knew that what you were doing was just prolonging an eventual- no, an inevitable outcome, but after everything you went through, you learned a few lessons. All good things came to an end—everything had to end at some point. Your marriage sure did, but that didn’t mean that you’d go back and change a thing. Yes, things with Klaus ended badly, but he gave you a thousand good years first.
So if what you were doing with Kol ended, then at least you had this. At least you had dances in the living room, and stargazing, and soft kisses.
Maybe this story wouldn’t have a happy ending.
But as long as you got a happy middle, then you were okay with that.
And he did everything he could to give you just that. 
It felt… different, to be with someone other than Niklaus, but it was a good different. It felt good to smile and to actually mean it. And it made you wish for something more, to be more than just two people engaging in a forbidden love affair, but that’s what this was, wasn’t it?
But Kol made it feel like it really was more than that. He made you feel like a diamond, like you were beautiful, like everything that had weighed down on you only made you that much stronger. 
This was more. This was so much more than you could’ve ever hoped for.
You were lying in bed together late at night when it happened. You weren’t expecting it- you weren’t sure if you ever expected it. But Kol was always one to do the unexpected, surprise you and keep you on the edge of your seat.
Yet, when he spoke, he didn’t sound so dauntless. He sounded small and afraid, but at the same time, you could hear the hope in his voice. Hope, courage, bravery—at the end of the day, it was just called Kol.
He was always brave enough for the both of you.
“I love you.”
Your breath hitched, turning to see that he was already staring at you. The déjà vu hit you hard. Here you were, in the same position you’d already been in with him, but this time, he looked right at you.
Brave enough for the both of you.
You didn’t say anything. You wondered if you were dreaming, hallucinating, imagining things, if this was some cruel trick of the mind. But, the longer you stared and the longer he stared right back at you, the more convinced you became.
This was real.
This was real.
You wrapped your arm around his neck, pulling him in and connecting his lips with yours. Butterflies still erupted in your stomach, even though you had been at this for a while. You put your everything into this kiss, but Kol deserved more than everything.
This scared you, but Kol had given you so much. He didn’t need to be the brave one all the time.
You wanted to be brave, too.
So when you finally pulled away, resting your forehead on his, eyes closed, you whispered back, “I love you.” 
You and Kol were brave together, braver together. Yeah, there were dragons out there so much more powerful than you, but you could slay them together. Maybe it would’ve been safer to just stay away, to just tuck yourself away in a castle and avoid the dragons altogether, but what was the point in that?
What was the point of being alive if you weren’t truly living?
And you were living.
Everyone around you could see it. Your change in behaviour was unusual, but it lifted everyone’s spirits. You were starting to be able to actually hold a conversation with Rebekah, and you were starting to be able to talk to Elijah about things other than the family’s latest conflicts. You were even starting to be a little more friendly with Hayley.
You didn’t tell her, but a part of you was thankful for what she did. She knew who you were when she met Klaus; she knew he was married, and she still slept with him. This had previously enraged you, but now you couldn’t help but feel relieved.
Had she not done what she did, you may have never had this with Kol.
And Hope would’ve never been born.
Oh, you would do anything for her. This family may have been cursed, but you were all willing to do whatever it took to break the cycle. No more running, no more instability. No matter how dysfunctional you all were, you would give her that.
She was never alone. When her parents weren’t there to bring her or pick her up from school, you were. And if you weren’t, then Kol was, or Rebekah, or Elijah, or Marcel. The odds were against you from the start, but you were all there to flip them. 
For her.
You were always happy with Hope, but even she could tell that something had changed. She was a child, but she was bright, and she knew you were happier.
The relationships in your life blossomed. Klaus was the only person that this didn’t happen with.
You loved Kol—you were in love with Kol, but loving him didn’t skew your memory. Klaus and you had a long history. You still couldn’t look at him without picturing it.
It was easier to be more forgiving of Hayley. She wasn’t the one who vowed to be faithful to you, nor was she the one to cheat on you three times or give up on your marriage. He was. You couldn’t see yourself letting go of that. Maybe one day, but being around him wouldn’t speed up that process.
Klaus was actually the last person on your mind.
But that didn’t seem to be the case for him.
You were on your way out of the compound when something caught your eye. You stopped, turning to see your husband by himself in an empty hallway. It appeared that something had caught his eye, too.
He was so focused that he didn’t even see you. You could’ve pretended not to see him, walked away and gone on with your business, but you knew what he was looking at. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t look at it every once in a while, too.
Yes, you could’ve walked away, but the easy thing was never easy for you to do.
So you walked up to him, leaving a foot between you and looking at what had captured his attention. It was a portrait, and a familiar one at that.
The truth was, you’d studied that portrait until it was engraved into your memory. Even when you weren’t looking at it, it still came and found you in your dreams and even when you were just sitting around and thinking.
It was you. It was you, and Klaus, and Rebekah, and Elijah, and Kol. Before he died, before Hayley, before this godforsaken city. It was when things were calm, when you still had some sort of semblance of family. Or at least that’s what it was supposed to be.
Because it wasn’t real.
You never got together for this portrait. This time didn’t exist. It was fake. Niklaus was such a wonderful artist that he almost made you believe it, but it wasn’t real. He could paint you all so realistically, make you look so happy, but when was the last time you were all happy as a family? It was never in these clothes, never in this age.
But he made it look real.
He made it look like you were all picture-perfect, like his brother didn’t bring you to your end, like Rebekah never lost her mind, like Kol was never murdered, like you were never out crying in the rain for a man who would never change, like he was a man who could change.
Who knew that such a happy picture could evoke such sadness. Because this portrait wasn’t what was— it was what could’ve been.
Klaus broke the silence with a voice you would’ve never heard without enhanced hearing. “I really did love you.” Neither of you turned to face the other. “I really do love you.”
Not too long ago, you would’ve started crying. And while tears did build in your eyes, you smiled first. You didn’t doubt that. It didn’t take you long to respond, “So did I.”
1996, when you left, when you came back, when he cheated again, when you found out he was having a baby, when he killed Leo, when you stayed, when you took Hope. All of this flashed before your eyes, but it wasn’t all you saw. You also saw your wedding, your first time, when he painted you as you slept, when you got drunk together, when he cooked for you, when you kissed on the beach at night all by yourselves. You saw how happy he made you and how easily he just took it away from you.
You would never forget these things, none of it. You would never forget the bad, but you would never forget the good, either.
He lightly chuckled as if he was remembering all the same things as you. And then, for a while, you both just stood there, staring at the painting. There was a time when you could practically read his mind, but now you had no idea what he was thinking.
You were different people now. You weren’t the same people who went through the good, nor were you the same people who went through the bad. You weren’t the same people you could’ve been in that picture, either.
And he knew that, too.
“I’m never going to be your husband again, am I?” He mused, but this wasn’t a question. You both already knew the answer, even if you hadn’t said it out loud to each other.
“No.” You shook your head, opting to look down at your boots. “No, you’re not.”
Maybe you were imagining it, but out of the corner of your eye, you saw him wipe at his eye. Suddenly, a part of you felt bad, but not for him. You felt bad for the boy you fell in love with, the boy who gave you humanity even when he had lost his own. And you felt bad for the girl who kissed him at the altar.
So, against your current feelings, you turned and swiftly wrapped your arms around him, hoping that you weren’t just hugging Klaus, but that you were hugging the boy you married all those years ago. He quickly hugged you back, holding you tightly, but his grip slowly lessened.
Like he was getting ready to let you go.
You don’t know how long you were in his arms, but eventually he pulled away. You could finally see his eyes, his beautiful blue eyes, and how they were filled with tears despite the smile on his face. He didn’t say anything, and he didn’t need to. You had both said everything you needed to say; there were no more chapters to write in this book of yours.
It was time for your story to end.
You let go of each other and you turned around, walking away without sparing that painting another glance. You were just at the edge of the hallway when he called your name, making you turn your head.
“Be happy with him,” he said, even though it looked like it annihilated him to say it.
But you didn’t question it. You just nodded, then you turned around and walked away. You didn’t need to ask him who he was referring to or have him explain any further. You understood perfectly.
You would.
You were gonna be happy with him.
And just like that, the Original Hybrid and the Mikaelson Wife were done.
But who knew? You could very well become a Mikaelson once again if Kol got his way. You wouldn’t admit, just as to not inflate his ego, but deep down, you wanted him to get his way.
Slowly, the suspicions your other siblings had became confirmed. You weren’t overly affectionate in public, but they were able to put two and two together. Rebekah had been in love so many times that she was able to see it clearly on you, and Elijah was always the scholar amongst you, the smart one. Marcel saw it from a mile away. While he and Kol hadn’t always gotten along well, they were both willing to put that aside for you.
Even a child could see that you were in love; Hope did.
“Aunt Y/N/N, do you and Uncle Kol love each other like Belle and the Beast?”
You both simultaneously turned to her, along with everyone else in the living room. It was movie night; Beauty and the Beast had just finished, and Hope had asked you that question as soon as the credits were rolling.
She was just a kid who was curious. She didn’t know the potential outrage her question could cause.
But you weren’t gonna lie to her. You weren’t gonna deny what was possibly the best thing you ever had, even as your entire family was in the room.
“Hope-” Hayley had started to scold, but you cut her off.
“Hayley, it’s alright.” She didn’t look convinced and still looked embarrassed, but you turned back to Hope with a smile on your face. “Yes, sweetheart, Uncle Kol and I do love each other.”
She now looked confused, like your reply hadn’t cleared anything up at all. “But my daddy looks at you the way Uncle Kol looks at you.” You opened your mouth, but you didn’t know what to say. “Does daddy love you, too?”
It appeared that none of you had the answer to her question. How were you meant to explain your situation to a child, that you and her father had loved one another for a thousand years and then your relationship ended because he slept with her mother?
What you were least expecting happened. Instead of having an outburst, Klaus beckoned Hope over, petting her hair once she was sat on his lap. “Ah, my littlest wolf,” he sighed, but the corners of his lips were upturned. His eyes were slightly glazed over as if he wasn’t really there, but that look quickly disappeared. For Hope, he’d be present. “I wish that love was as simple to understand as Belle and the Beast, but it is much more complicated than that. Your Aunt Y/N has been there for me many times, and for that, I will always love her,” he professed. His eyes found yours for a moment, but he quickly looked back to his daughter. “But we love each other differently from how her and Uncle Kol love each other. We love each other as family, not as people in love with one another. But no matter what any of us feel for each other in this family, Hope, we will all always love you.”
Hope slung her arms around her father’s neck. “I love you, too, daddy.”
“Always and forever, little one.”
While Hope’s back was turned, your eyes met again and the corners of your lips quirked up slightly. You knew that must’ve been hard for him to say, so you mouthed, thank you.
He smiled back at you. Even though it was so obviously fake, you still appreciated it. He nodded in response.
Yes, you and Klaus had been through a lot. You all had complicated relationships with one another, Kol and you included, but you were gonna push that aside for Hope. Every time.
One day, you would explain it all to her, how Marcel was her brother but your son, why Rebekah was so soft and hard at the same time, why Elijah was so protective, why her parents weren’t together, how you fell in and out of love with her father, why you were still here, how you fell in love with Kol.
But for now, you were gonna let her hold onto her innocence for as long as she could.
Hope still had questions, but she also had all of you to distract her from all of the problems you dealt with. However, you were no longer consumed by all these problems. You had someone to distract you, too, and that was Kol.
Whether you were in bed together, kissing, or just holding hands, he always took your mind off your troubles. He was like a wizard, transporting you from reality and bringing you to cloud nine every day. The problems, the threats, the drama—none of it mattered to you. To you, being with Kol was enough.
If you could just have this for the rest of your life, then you’d be happy, and that is exactly what he wanted to give you.
Time passed in a blur. It was a true what they said, that time flied when you were having fun. Before you knew it, a year had passed since Kol first kissed you, since you started this. A perfect year, calm with minimal conflict both in the Quarter and in the Abattoir.
You could’ve passed many more years this way happily, but you were always one to accept less than what you were worth. Kol knew that, and he wanted more for you- more for both of you.
He wanted to do more than just take you to dreams away from reality.
He wanted to make those dreams come true.
“Kol, what are you doing?” You giggled, stumbling a little but never falling. Kol would never let you fall.
He hushed you, “Shhh, we’re almost there.” 
A blindfold was over your eyes as he guided you around. You got into the car together hours ago, and when you woke up, the blindfold was on. He said he had a surprise for you.
This was so cheesy, but you were a sucker for these kinds of things. You never thought you’d get to a place like this again, that you’d be a hopeless romantic or even just a romantic ever again after what Klaus did to you, but Kol made you believe in romance again.
He put your heart back together after you thought it’d been broken beyond repair.
Finally, after more stumbling and laughing, he stopped, holding you in place. “Okay, are you ready?” You couldn’t see him, but you could hear the excitement in his voice. You nodded. “Alright. Three, two, one-”
The blindfold fell to the ground and the sight he’d been withholding was revealed to you. Your brows furrowed. You were in a living room with beautiful floors and beautiful decor, a fireplace parallel to the big couch behind you. You looked around and saw incredible artwork hanging on the walls and gorgeous windows that let the moonlight in.
It was beautiful and all, but did you drive all this way to break into someone’s house?
You voiced your confusion. “Kol, what is this place?” You turned around to see him trying to hold back a smile, a twinkle in his eyes. He looked like a kid about to tell you that he saw Santa. That thought made you laugh. “C’mon, Kol, really. Where are we right now?”
“Well, geographically, we’re in North Carolina.” His explanation produced a gasp from you, making him laugh. He was having way too much fun having you in the dark.
“North Carolina?” you echoed. Your jaw was practically on the floor. “We’re in North Carolina? You’re kidding- that’s like ten hours away-”
“Thirteen, darling.” This didn’t get rid of your disbelief, though you doubt that was what Kol was aiming for, anyway. He shrugged, adding, “Well, I actually got it down to twelve, but that’s besides the point.”
“Trust me, the shocker for me is not your reckless driving-”
He cut you off by speeding to you, lifting up your chin so you were looking right into his eyes. Funny, how he was still able to make you speechless. “I’m going to ignore that jab at my impeccable driving skills because I love you.”
You snorted, “Sure, if impeccable means shit.”
He hushed you again, causing you to roll your eyes. “Back to your question,” he said, making you remember the topic of conversation. You wondered if he had any idea how easily he was able to make you forget about anything—about everything. “I drove us here because North Carolina is relatively… quiet.”
You raised a brow. “Quiet?”
“Yes.” He gently grabbed your hands, holding them in his. Sometimes, he did this absentmindedly, but you were never bothered. You were far from bothered. “Louisiana is perhaps the heart of the supernatural. New York and any other state with a thriving night life also has a thriving vampire population, and they’re busy enough with humans as it is. The big states always are. But North Carolina… North Carolina isn’t on any vampire’s bucket list.”
You drawled, “Okayyyyyy… but why are we here?” What he was saying made sense, but you didn’t get how it related to either of you.
He just smiled, so clearly amused by your confusion. “You amaze me, Y/N, truly,” he proclaimed, that same shit-eating grin on his face that you’d grown accustomed to. “Only you would take so long to get the hint.”
That was obviously a hint, too, but you weren’t catching it. Kol shook his head, getting that look in his eye that he got when he was remembering something. “You told me once that, if we weren’t who we were, you’d want to live somewhere without ruckus, like a normal person. But you knew that couldn’t happen with my brother’s aspirations.” Now he looked at you pointedly and, all of a sudden, a wave of realization washed over you.
Your eyes darted all over the house. There was a reason why you were so in love with it. You looked back to Kol, mouth agape. He continued, “You wanted a house that wasn’t just decadent, but a home.”
Tears welled in your eyes as your hand flew up to cup your mouth in shock. You could remember telling him that, but it was so long ago. You’d long since abandoned the idea, but here he was, offering it up to you. “You- you remember that?”
He leaned in to wipe a tear that you didn’t even notice had fell, caressing your cheek. “I remember every moment I’ve ever spent with you, Y/N.” His actions were pointless because his words caused even more tears to fall.
You had never felt such an overwhelming feeling, so in love, so loved. Your heart’s immediate instinct was to kiss him, to say yes, but your mind… you’d been through enough to know better. 
“How are we going to-” you stammered, “we can’t- we can’t just move away.”
“Y/N-”
“This is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me, but-” your voice cracked. “we can’t just pick up and leave, Kol—you know that.”
He was now cupping both of your cheeks, staring so deeply into your eyes that you were sure he could see the parts of yourself that you’d tucked away. “Do you remember when I left Mystic Falls?” Of course, you did. How could you ever forget? “I asked you to come with me and you didn’t. Why was that?”
You didn’t want to answer, to relive this after you’d already agonized over it for so long, but you did, anyway. “Klaus. I didn’t go because of Klaus.”
“Exactly. You didn’t go because of that bastard, and you don’t want this now for the same reason.”
“Kol-”
He stepped closer when you thought he’d already closed all the space between you. His voice was soft and firm all at once. “I died thinking I’d never get the chance to tell you how I felt. I wasted so much time, worrying, unhappy.” He shook his head. “Well, I don’t want to worry anymore. I don’t want to waste any more time.” More tears fell, from both of you. “You make me happy, Y/N. I just want to be happy with you.”
A teary laugh escaped your lips. He made you happy, too, so much happier than you’d been in so long, so much happier than you even thought was possible after everything you’d been through. And he was right. Klaus was the one thing holding you back, but why should he get to do that?
You’ve given away years of your life for other people. Couldn’t you be selfish, just this once, and have this one thing for yourself?
You just wanted to be happy.
So you pulled him in and kissed him until you had to pull away for air, and when you did, you whispered, “Yes.”
And that may have just been the best decision you had ever made.
When you eventually drove back to New Orleans days later, you explained the situation to Klaus. He wasn’t jumping up and down with joy, but he surprisingly took it better than you expected.
You spent a thousand years with that man; saying goodbye wasn’t as easy as it seemed, but it needed to happen. It was time for you to go your separate ways. And even after everything he put you through, you still hoped that he could maybe find happiness one day, too.
Niklaus Mikaelson was your epic love, but you knew without a doubt that Kol was your true love. He was the warmth you’d been yearning for, and you were gonna let yourself have that.
North Carolina was the perfect place for you to settle down. It was quiet, like Kol said, with little to no supernatural population. It was also close enough to Louisiana that you could distance yourself from all the crazy but still get there if they needed you.
That’s what you told Elijah when you said your goodbye to him, that you were just a phone call away. He was gonna be the one running the show now, as always. He was always the responsible one amongst you, and you hoped that he’d let go of that and let himself live a little, too. As much as you didn’t like her, maybe he could get with Hayley one day or even find his own person.
You had hope that all of your family could one day be free of this Mikaelson curse, that they wouldn’t be bearing the hybrid’s sins for the rest of their lives. Rebekah was getting there. She was still growing up a little, and she all the time in the world to do that.
It was hard saying goodbye to Hope, but you just reassured her that this wasn’t goodbye. She’d always have a place in your home if she so needed it, and she’d definitely always hold a place in your heart. The only reason you felt okay with leaving her was because you knew she wouldn’t be alone; she had two parents that loved her more than life, a crazy aunt and uncle, and her big brother.
Marcel congratulated you with a wide grin on his face. He was elated for you, telling you that he’d be visiting you, to which you replied that he would always be welcome with you two.
Maybe you were just sentimental, but even saying goodbye to the city itself was hard, nerve-racking. It had given you so much, but taken so much more. You were learning, though, that love wasn’t supposed to drain you. You were learning to let go.
Goodbye, New Orleans, you whispered to yourself as you passed the town sign, and then you were saying hello to North Carolina… and also the new you.
Y/N and Kol Michaels. You got married not too far down the line. Of course, if you wanted to be normal, ditching the medieval last name was best. You supposed you could’ve kept it, but getting rid of it was more symbolic than anything.
You wanted to start over completely, and so that’s what you guys did. You weren’t abandoning your family, but making one of your own, too. Eventually, the idea of kids came up. You wanted nothing more than to raise your own child with the man you were in love with, but you couldn’t conceive a child and you didn’t want to drag one into this life, anyway. It was too dangerous.
The realization that you would never get to have kids broke your heart, but your lover repaired it like his words were glue. The two of you were together, and that was good enough for you.
Doing this, starting over, was scarier than any other situation you had ever been in—and that was saying something, considering how long you’d lived. But with Kol at your side, you were able to be brave. 
There was so much to be afraid of. You were scared that this wouldn’t work out, that this was only a happy middle with no happy ending, that you’d feel cold again one day after growing accustomed to the fire, but if all of that happened one day, then you decided that you’d be okay with it. You would be okay with it because at least you lived. You weren’t gonna let your fears stop you from doing that. If you just gave into your fears, then you would’ve never felt this feeling. You would’ve never fallen in love. You would’ve never found yourself again.
You owed it all to your bravery.
And you owed it all to Kol’s.
But together, you were fearless. Together, you were braver.
You were braver together.
Taglist: @honestlycasualarcade @hyperactivewhore @tnrthings @brooklynscherry-z @roselibrary @kollover24 @volturissideslut
a/n: sorry for the long wait, but here is part two! ik i said i was gonna do the thg fanfic first, but that one is long asf so i decided to drop this first. i tried my best to listen to all ur suggestions—unfortunately, i couldn't find a way to write in a pregnancy. but we've got a happy ending! i really, really, really did not want a happy ending, like i had a whole sad ending planned for the part 2 but everyone wanted happiness so i just decided to end it there to avoid to outrage lol. if u want a part 3 where it doesn't end there but ends the way it was supposed to originally, then tell me. and lastly, thank u all so much for all the support!
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bigbadvoxbox · 2 months
Note
Hi, I would like to ask for a smut from Adam x fem Reader, he takes Lucifer's wife so he can get back at Lucifer I love your posts
THANKS ANON
warnings: previous lucifer x reader. unprotected sex (don't do this). degradation if you squint? like a brief mix of both degradation and praise.
- Lucifer's pretty ex-wife, almost looking more like an angel than a demon, which was one thing that Adam found pretty appealing. The attractive appearance, with the subtle demonic features? Badass. He was into it.
- Puts his plan into action. He knows usually he can get any girl he wants, he's fucking Adam, but you're gonna be special. You were Lucifer's bitch (affectionately), so he wants to make this BIG.
- He plays it real cool. Lucifer almost hands you over himself, sending you to a meeting Adam had requested instead of showing up himself. This was the second time Lucifer had bailed like this now, what a little bitch. He can't help but feel lucky that even after splitting, you were still on okay enough terms for Lucifer to ask you such a favour.
- You have a little chat, and he plays a few harmless little jokes on you. It's been a while since you've laughed this way, and you confide in Adam that Lucifer wasn't the most social. You missed him. He stayed locked away in his room, and you got a small "hi, sweetheart" now and again, but it just wasn't the same. Not compared to how he used to hold you in his arms, sing songs to you, like a fairytale type of love. You missed that. Which was why you left him.
- Adam couldn't help but scoff at this, he should've expected as much from Lucifer.
- "Y'know, he missed out on some good shit. You're a fuckin' hottie. I don't know what he was doing ignoring a babe like you." He says. It's meant to be... comforting? Maybe? In his own way. You're a little confused, but also a little flattered?
- You two start to gossip like friends would, and you become more comfortable with the man sitting a few seats away from you, completely forgetting about the business portion of this meeting (a.k.a. the bullshit Adam made up to even get the meeting in the first place).
- He brags about himself a bit, and you can't help but find it the littlest bit charming, in a funny way. He talks about his band, how he "fuckin' shreds like a badass" on the guitar, and how the fangirls go crazy for him.
- "I'm not too interested in them though. I have my eye on someone else. I mean- yeah, they're cute 'n all, but nothing compared to this one chick I've been thinkin' about lately. She's somethin' real special." he explains.
- "A cute little lady whose shitty ex-husband left her feelin' so lonely... and unsatisfied too, I bet."
- That's when you catch on, taking notice of the subtle flirtatious smirk that plays on his lips. You feel your cheeks burn the slightest bit, and you turn your head away, a bit speechless.
- Adam knows he has you now.
- A few sweet words later, and steps closer that you didn't even really seem to notice him taking, too busy focusing on his (slightly vulgar) flattery, you now feel each other's breath against your faces. The moment is tense, and his lips, now exposed after he removed his mask, ghosting over yours.
- The mask was quite the reveal. But you had to admit, he was not at all bad looking. He wasn't exceptional, but he didn't need to be. You liked him just the way he was. In this small meeting he had shown you more kindness and attention than your husband had in a while.
- One thing led to the next. A flirtatious glance, a gentle brush against each other's hand, and next thing you know, you're laying on your back on the meeting table, Adam between your legs, his lips on your neck.
- He can't help but leave you absolutely covered in hickeys. It's nice to be possessive over something. Someone who's his now. He finally turned the tables on Lucifer, and that thought can't help but bring a smug grin to his face.
- When he was joking around earlier, calling himself the "dick master" you thought he was kidding.
He was not.
- He fucking pounds you into the table, one hand on your waist, the other on your tits, feelin' you up and teasin' you to get you all flustered. He wonders how long it's been since you felt this good, but don't worry, he'll make you forget all about that.
- He can't deny that you feel (ironically enough) fucking heavenly. It's like he can't get enough of it. Not only is the sex itself amazing, he just can't get enough of the victorious feeling of getting back at Lucifer.
- Trust me when I say he has you SCREAMING. He's so fucking glad he didn't use the hologram, instead taking the risk of going down to Hell himself, just for the opportunity to feel that cunt on his cock.
- "That's a good fuckin' bitch."
- He honestly can't even quite help the filth that just comes out of his mouth so naturally, his language vulgar but.. kinda hot?
- He can't help but cum inside you and fill you up, groaning a drawn out "Fuck yes." as he hovers over you on the table.
- He's pretty happy with his new badass demon bitch by his side, and his visits to Hell on "business" become a lot more frequent. The business in question is just him fucking you in every possible position, leaving you covered in hickeys, kisses, and bite marks. You're all his now. Suck it, Lucifer.
THATS IT
it's almost 4 am so this is not at all proofread
so if it's shit
i'm sorry
edit: the cheating part made me feel bad so i switched it up
517 notes · View notes
yandere-kittee · 1 year
Text
Yandere! Experiment x Scientist!Reader.
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Note: I haven't posted in a long time, so have this as compensation. (I haven't finished writing my smut yet(ू˃̣̣̣̣̣̣︿˂̣̣̣̣̣̣ ू) )
❦Contains: Yandere behavior, platonic yandere, murder, manipulation, Gn! Reader, You are just called 'Mom'.
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You were horrified by the scene in front of you, even more when the reason for this scene was reaching out to you with such an Innocent smile.
"What's wrong Mom? Shouldn't you be happy that they won't seperate us anymore? " It asked you, staring up at you with blood splattered all over their face, their bloodied hands holding onto your white coat.
Your lips pressed into a thin line as you raised a shaky hand, patting it's head, "Th-That's right, you did such a good job sweetie. " you said with a shaky voice, it was hard not to when you've just been scared out of your wits mind.
It's smile widens and buries it's head against your stomach, most definitely smearing blood onto your clothes, your glad for it because you didn't want them to see tears spill and run down your cheeks.
While they hug you, you had to watch with horrified eyes as you saw all of your colleagues dead mutilated bodies on the floor, blood and guts splattered everywhere, their deaths we're cruel and inhumane as the cause for their deaths hugs you.
This monster.
You honestly should've seen it coming, being nice to one of the experiments that the facility your working for kept, maybe because they resembled that of a child, so you wanted to be more nice to it.
So you treated it like any child you've encountered, you we're gentle and patient unlike the others, you treated it as if it was human, you played with it.
And sometimes you'll sneak it snacks that children around your place often liked.
At first, it was wary of you, because naturally, they haven't had the best treatment from scientists in this facility, they weren't very nice with the experiments, it only seemed natural to treat them as such because they were monsters, made to be weapons of mass destruction.
But within months of treating them like you would a child, they had warmed up to you, seeing you as a Parental Figure, to which the others seemed to notice because they we're more cooperative when you're with them.
And soon enough, they we're now under your care, you became a research scientist with a part time job as a babysitter.
They soon became clingy and didn't want you to leave them, "Don't leave me! " They exclaim while clinging onto your arm in desperation, "I won't be for long, I will just be taking a break and I'll come back. " You said.
"Why not just take it here? You said you wouldn't leave me. " They said, rubbing their face against your arm, Right, you did say that.
"Well, I can't exactly be able to. My lunch box is inside the cafeteria. " You said.
You often give them things you find outside the facility, to give them something that may remind them of the world outside, pretty rocks, flowers, and etc.
Their room became a safe space for the two of you.
Until it wasn't.
"Mom! " They beam, standing up from their position on the floor once you arrive with fresh warm food in your hands, they walk up to you and sniff the food, "What's this one called? " they ask curiously.
"It's carbonara. I found a recipe for it and thought you would like it. " You settle the dish on the table and go to grab plates and utensils, "I always like the things you make me. " They smiles, sitting down on the chair.
"That's great to hear. " You say, opening the drawer of utensils, your eyes landing on the sharp knife hidden away.
...
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I hope you guys enjoyed this! I quite enjoyed writing this one, anyways, sorry for the late post!
[Requests are open]
👏( 'ω' )👏( 'ω' )
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2K notes · View notes
sissyisawitch · 4 months
Text
I'll Be Home For Christmas
Relationship: Sebastian Sallow x f!MC
Summary: After leaving everything behind and starting a new life almost three years ago, MC returns to Hogsmeade for Christmas Eve. Little does she know that her brief return will be enough for her past to catch up with her…
Word Count: ~9.4k
Warnings: Mentions of alcohol in the beginning? Otherwise it's just pure pining and fluff
Author's Note: Special one shot because I just love Christmas. It should've been even longer, but I had to shorten it, or I'd never have managed to post it in time for Christmas. Anyway, I had a blast writing it, and I hope you'll enjoy it as much as I did!
I wish you all a wonderful Christmas!🎅🎄 Lots of love💕
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“Oh, MC, I can’t get over how much we’ve missed of each other’s life. You can’t imagine how much I’ve missed you!”
MC and Poppy sat in a cozy corner of the Three Broomsticks, whose dim lighting and soft hum of conversation provided a comfortable backdrop for their reunion. Excitement and laughter had been echoing for the past hours, as the two best friends shared their numerous respective adventures, and reminisced about the wonderful times they shared while at Hogwarts.
“Life sadly took us on separate journeys after graduation, there was no other way… But I'm so grateful that we haven't lost touch.” MC said as she took a sip of her third Butterbeer of the afternoon. She had never realised how much she had missed the sugary drink, especially after being away from Hogsmeade for so long. It tasted of the good old days when she spent the entire day shopping with her schoolmates, before going for a collation to relax and forget about the homework they had to do.
After Hogwarts, Poppy became a renowned Magizoologist, following in her grandmother's footsteps, like she had always dreamt of doing. As for MC, she had taken a very different path. Barely a few weeks after graduating, the girl had decided to leave everything behind and embark on a life full of travel and adventure. She never stayed in one location for very long. Her aim was to discover as many places as she could.
Now, the only thing left of her former life was her best friend Poppy, and the letters they regularly exchanged. It was for her that MC had exceptionally returned to Hogsmeade, to see her on this Christmas Eve.
“Merlin… I didn’t realise it was so late already.” MC sighed as she looked out the window. The evening sun painted the sky in hues of orange and pink, casting a warm glow through the pub windows.
Poppy grimaced in response, as if a bittersweet realisation came to her, “Time flies when you’re having fun. I wish I could stay longer... but Gran hasn't been well lately, and I've already left her on her own all afternoon...”
“Don't worry, Poppy. I totally understand.”
“I'd love to offer you a place to stay, especially since it’s Christmas Eve… but as I said, it's complicated at the moment.”
MC offered the girl another genuine and reassuring smile, “It’s okay, I don't mind. I've managed to find a room in an inn for a couple of days.”
“I'm glad to hear that.” Poppy smiled back, although ruefully.
After paying for their drinks, the two girls made their way out. They stood on the porch on the Three Broomstick in contemplative silence, the air thick with unspoken emotions. The time had come to bid farewell once again.
Poppy took a deep breath, as if to get rid of the lump in her throat, before breaking the silence, "MC, it's been wonderful catching up with you. I wish we could freeze time and stay like this forever."
A wistful smile played on MC's lips. "Life moves on, though. We have our own journeys to continue."
Poppy hesitated before uttering her newt words, “…Don't let it be another three years before our next reunion."
“It won’t. I promise.” MC replied weakly, having to bite the inside of her cheek to hold back her tears. She had never been very good at goodbyes.
Maybe that was why she had never said one to Sebastian.
With a lingering hug, they exchanged a few more words, promises to stay in touch, and expressions of hope for the future. It was nightfall when Poppy finally disapparated, leaving MC alone on the village streets, which were neither crowded nor deserted. Most of the people still outside were on their way home, or off to enjoy a late drink with their friends.
MC walked for a while, before stopping at a vantage point overlooking the quaint village which was bathed in the soft glow of Christmas lights that shimmered like a galaxy full of stars. Tremendous decorated Christmas trees could be found on every street corner, perfectly matching the garlands of fir branches that linked the roofs of the various cottages. It was even possible to find some snowmen that were bewitched to fill the air with the enchanting melodies of Christmas carols. The whole scene resembled a holiday postcard brought to life, especially with the thick blanket of snow covering the village.
It was magical. Literally.
As MC gazed at the picturesque view, memories started flooding her mind. The charming village setting reminded her of the spirited Christmases she used to share with Sebastian, spending the best part of their day at Zonko's trying to find a way to prank Ominis, before heading off to Honeydukes to buy Chocolate Frogs, just in case the blond ended up sulking for too long. The inseparable duo then made it back to the Great Hall just in time for the big Christmas feast, where they joined Ominis. The smell of roasted turkey, and the sound of familiar laughter echoed in MC’s thoughts.
After dinner, the group of friends used to return to their common room and sit down by the fire. She could almost hear the crackling of the fireplace, and feel the camaraderie that accompanied their joyful exchange of gifts. After that, Ominis fell asleep very quickly, and MC and Sebastian usually took the opportunity to get a little closer. If she closed her eyes, she could feel the sensation of his shoulder used as a pillow against her cheek, while his woody cologne invaded her nostrils.
MC could never escape these kinds of memories, especially when she was in Hogsmeade.
Everything always led back to Sebastian in Hogsmeade.
That was why she had refused to set foot there for so long.
To forget the insurmountable heartbreak of never having her feelings returned by the love of her life, MC had decided to start a new life. She had wanted to move on, to forget her feelings for Sebastian, but she had known that this would prove to be impossible with him in her life. She had therefore decided to make a clean break – because she knew that bidding Sebastian farewell was not a skill she possessed – and to disappear brutally. To make her plan even more effective, she had also cut ties with Ominis, seeing as he was Sebastian’s best friend, and MC had felt awkward to put him in the middle of her drama. The only thing MC had kept from her old life was Poppy... now her one and only friend.
MC had then spent years travelling around the world, searching for a place where she would feel comfortable enough, and that she would love enough to want to settle there for the rest of her life. The goal to her quest was to find a place that felt like home.
After almost three years, she still had not found her home.
“Ow!” MC suddenly exclaimed. Someone forcefully colliding against her back disrupted her reverie.
“I’m so sorry, ma’am. I didn’t see you.”
MC turned at the sound of a deep masculine voice. Indeed, the man could not possibly have seen her, for he was carrying a large pile of children's toys in his arms, up to his eye level, thus blocking his field of vision.
The man shifted the pile of toys into one of his arms instead of both, moving them away from his face to take a look at the unlucky person he had just unintentionally bumped into.
Next thing MC knew, before she could even realise it, MC found herself face to face with none other than Sebastian.
His chocolate eyes widened in recognition as they locked onto hers. An amalgam of shock and bewilderment flashing across his face, washing away his previous apologetic look. He was so flabbergasted that he forgot about the packages in his hands, which began to wobble. MC rushed closer to him, to put the parcels back upright, and prevent them from shattering on the floor.
“…MC?” He asked hesitantly, never tearing his gaze away from her, just to make sure he was not dreaming, that his former best friend was well and truly standing in front of him.
“Hi.” She smiled softly at him. She could not believe that she had not recognised what had once been the only voice capable of soothing her even on her worst days. To be fair, it had changed remarkably. It was more intense, manly... even sexy.
“You’re back?” He questioned eagerly, a beaming grin breaking through the initial stupor.
MC nodded in response. She could not bring herself to tell him that it was only temporary, or even worse to admit to him that she had not come back for him, that she had never had a single intention of ever seeing him again. She could not be the one to wipe that gorgeous smile from his tantalising lips. It would break her own heart all over again.
As she kept staring into those familiar eyes, a rush of emotions overwhelmed MC. The old crush she had once harboured seemed to reignite with an unexpected intensity. It was unbelievably insane that just one glance at him was all it took to make her flamboyant feelings for him resurface. She thought she had managed to eradicate them, but she had actually only been able to bury them deep inside.
However, with that also came the horrid realisation that Sebastian was carrying a large number of toys in his arms. As MC looked once again at the eye-catching bundles in his arms, reality struck her like a cold breeze.
There, nestled in his grasp, was the object of the rude shock that life had evolved without her, in ways she never could have foreseen. Obviously, these toys were for his children, meaning that Sebastian was also married and had a loving wife waiting at home for him.
MC, still quite in denial, racked her brains to find another rational explication, but there was none. There was no other option because Ominis always said he never wanted kids in order not to pass on his ‘cursed Gaunt genes’. As for Anne… well last time MC had heard of Anne was the day Solomon Sallow died. After that, she had severed all contact with everyone except Ominis, who had promised her not to divulge any information about her whereabouts.
MC’s heart sank as her mind kept repeating itself that Sebastian had moved on, embracing a world that now included the joy and responsibility of raising a family.
“Merlin, MC! I thought I’d never see you again! You’ve missed so many things, there’s so much I need to tell you! Do you live here now?” If Sebastian had ever held a grudge against MC for disappearing without warning, no trace of it was visible. His excitement was taking over completely.
“I have a room at the Hog’s Head.”
“What? The Hog’s Head?” He exclaimed in horror – rather dramatically if you asked MC – “You can't possibly stay in this dodgy shithouse!”
MC was surprised by his crude words. She was used to his outspokenness, but she had not expected to hear it again so soon after such a long time. She could only shrug sheepishly, “I don't really have much choice... Sirona didn't have any more rooms available for me. Everything was booked up… you know… with the holidays.”
“Ah... Well, I can't exactly let a lovely lady like you sleep there. I've got room at home, you can come if you like.” Sebastian puffed out his chest, putting on his false air of chivalry.
MC tried her best to conceal the blush creeping up her cheeks, but alas, she could do nothing about her nervous stammering, “Oh… Oh, I… I don’t wanna bother you. Besides, the Hog’s Head’s not that bad…”
“Don't say no. Please. Really, I insist. We could spend the evening drinking and catching up… What d’you say?” Sebastian gave her the sad puppy eyes, and MC could feel all her resolve slipping away at the same second.
Thinking about it twice, the Hog's Head was truly, absolutely dreadful. The few times MC had been there, she had been catcalled far too many times for her liking.
So yes, she knew that staying with Sebastian, his wife and their children was going to be pure torture, but MC still preferred that to the risk of being mugged or assaulted by one of the Hog's Head patrons.
“Okay.” She ended up saying, forcing a smile that masked her internal turmoil.
“Brilliant!” Sebastian looked so excited that it would not have surprised MC if he had started jumping up and down. “Have you got any luggage you need to pick up in your room before going to my place?”
“No, I've just got this." MC replied, pointing to her small rectangular shoulder bag, barely large enough to hold a box of Bertie Bott’s Every Flavour Beans. “I travel light.”
“Perfect! Well then, if you will follow me, my lady.” He offered her his arm with a wink, and after a brief moment of surprise, she accepted it.
Sebastian made it so effortless to fall back into their old dynamic, that it made it just as natural and easy for MC to do the same. It was like they had never been apart.
They walked together, sticking close to each other, in the same way they used to do when they were still teenagers. As they strolled through the streets of Hogsmeade, MC assumed Sebastian was taking her to a Floo Flame. The girl was therefore genuinely caught off-guard when he stopped in front of her. a small house typical of the village – made of stone with an excessively pointed roof – and took out a key to open the front door.
“Ladies first.” Sebastian's face lit up with pride and joy, while he let MC in first, still the perfect gentleman as usual. Even married, he could not help being flirty.
Before entering, MC took a deep breath to try and calm her nerves, in anticipation of meeting the woman who had succeeded where she had failed, the woman who was better enough than her in Sebastian's eyes to have succeeded in stealing his golden heart.
However, instead of coming face to face with her nemesis, MC found herself immersed in an intimate reflection of Sebastian's essence, overwhelmed by how homey it felt. The house was truly cosy, but a little small for a family in MC's opinion. But then again, it had to be remembered that Sebastian was used to small spaces, having lived in his little one-room cottage in Feldcroft for most of his life.
The living room had the charm of disarray, with stacks of well-read books scattered on the coffee table next to empty mugs, suggesting that Sebastian had not lost his messy habits. The smell of the fireplace and coffee intermingled, creating a comforting atmosphere that reflected precisely the way Sebastian always managed to put MC at ease.
MC guessed that the upstairs, which was in fact a mezzanine, must be the bedroom. She did not dare go upstairs to respect his privacy, but from the ground floor, she could see the top of bookshelves reaching up to the pointed roof, proof that Sebastian was still as thirsty for knowledge as ever.
All these little details showed MC that, although his life had evolved, the man standing a few steps away from her was still her beloved Sebastian.
Sebastian, observing MC's reactions, could not suppress a grin, "It's not much, but it's home. You can have the bedroom, and I'll sleep on the couch.”
On further inspection of the house, MC came upon the kitchen, which was open to the living room. She could not help noticing that the worktops bore the marks of failed culinary experiments. Some pans with burnt bottoms were abandoned on the counter, and dirty cutlery had accumulated in the sink. In short, the kitchen was a mess, just as Sebastian could be in other people's lives.
However, what stood out most to MC was the absence of signs of shared living. There were no visible traces of another person – no stray belongings, no indications of a partner or children. It was as if the whole house resonated with Sebastian alone, as if his whole person had become woven into the fabric of his environment.
As MC continued to stare in silence at his topsy-turvy house, Sebastian scratched the back of his neck nervously, “Don't pay attention to the shambles, please. I didn't clean up... since I wasn't exactly expecting any guests.”
Instead of reassuring him as she would have liked, MC's curiosity was quicker to take over her next words, “Where’s your wife?”
“My wife?” Sebastian frowned.
“Yes. The woman you married.” She added bitterly. Her curiosity slowly lowered its mask to reveal its true self of authentic jealousy.
He looked away, but MC could still see that he was biting the inside of his cheek to keep a straight face, “I’m flattered you think I’m charming enough to get a wife, but I’m afraid there’s still no Mrs. Sallow. Besides Anne, of course.”
“Oh.”
“Oh?” Sebastian chuckled at her enigmatic reaction.
“I thought the toys were for your kids…” She admitted shyly, pretty embarrassed after making so many wrong assumptions about him.
“My kids? Bloody hell, MC, you sure have high expectations for me!” Sebastian exclaimed, clearly amused by the situation. “But no, I don't have kids. The toys are for my niece.”
MC was gob smacked, eyes wide and mouth agape, “Your… niece? You have a niece? Anne had a child? Wait, did she get married? With who?”
“That’s a lot of questions.” He smirked playfully at her, while looking for a bottle in one of his cabinets. “But I think you can guess the answer to the last one.”
MC looked down at her feet, taking a moment to think, when realisation hit her like a bolt of lightning. She turned her head back to Sebastian so fast it almost gave her whiplash, “Ominis?”
“Bingo.” Sebastian replied casually, uncorking a bottle of Firewhiskey. “And he took Anne's name. He's Mr. Sallow now.”
“No way!” She gasped, letting herself fall limply onto the sofa out of utter stupefaction.
“Yes way.” He laughed wholeheartedly, sitting down next to her and pouring two glasses of alcohol for each of them.
"How? When?"
"Apparently, after fifth year, they did more than just keep in touch."
MC took her glass in hand, but did not drink from it. She had far too many questions on her mind to take the time to have a sip, "But how did they deal with Anne's curse?"
"It disappeared once you killed Rookwood, since he was the one who cursed her. Apparently, magic disappears with the caster. I learnt all this a few months after graduation, when Anne got back in touch to invite me to their wedding…”
Sebastian suddenly paused in his explanations to down his glass of Firewhiskey in one gulp.
“She wanted to invite you too… I had to explain to her that you'd disappeared without warning." He continued, looking pained, and MC suspected it was not just because of the bitterness of the alcohol.
"I'm sorry." MC winced at her own words. She was pathetic to listen to, using the most clichéd and basic phrase. But it was all she could muster to respond, because it was exactly how she felt. She was profoundly sorry. Sorry to the people she cherished the most, for abandoning them without looking back. But also sorry for herself, because she now had to accept the bitter realisation that she had been absent for so many crucial milestones of their lives.
Sebastian only shook his head, avoiding her gaze and preferring to stare at his empty glass, "Why did you do that? Why didn't you say anything? I was worried sick ‘cause I thought something bad had happened to you, that some Ashwinders were still out there, and had kidnapped you. I spent months looking for you... I'd even asked the Aurors to search for you.”
MC sipped her drink slowly, using the alcohol as a distraction from the painfully heartbreaking explanations of the man sitting next to her
“…They eventually found you overseas. In perfect health... and in perfect company so I've heard. That's when I realised that you hadn't been taken away, but had gone away of your own free will.” Sebastian poured himself another glass before throwing it back again.
“I'm so sorry.”
He scoffed bitterly, “I don't want to hear that you're sorry. It's no use. I just want to know what you were thinking when you left.”
This time, it was MC's turn to down her glass before pouring her heart out in the most honest way possible, "I just needed to get away from everything, from the past. I just wanted to start again."
Against all odds, he nodded understandingly, "Wish I could stay mad at you for it... but I won’t say that I don’t understand."
What he did next surprised MC in the most pleasant way. Sebastian reached out towards her, placing his large hand on top of hers, which was resting on the brown leather of the sofa. Even if his hand was calloused and weathered by time and experience, MC was amazed by how perfectly it fit around her own.
"What matters is that you're here now." He offered her a tender smile that warmed her heart in the most appeasing way. Only he could do that to her.
"I am." MC smiled in return, even more brightly. It was contagious. She turned her hand over and intertwined their fingers together.
As their conversation died down, MC could not help but steal a moment to observe the transformation in Sebastian’s appearance. The once-adorable teenage boy she remembered had blossomed into a handsome man. His features, chiselled by the passage of time, sculpted a strong jawline that added a touch of rugged refinement to his countenance. The shadow of a beard adorned his face, giving him a distinguished and slightly mysterious air. Sebastian's tousled hair fell with a casual elegance, framing a face that bore the subtle imprints of life's experiences, such as a scar on his eyebrow arch that MC had never seen before.
The only remaining trace of the boyish charm that MC had cherished years ago, was the constellations of freckles that beautifully decorated his face. They had always made MC weak in the knees, but the butterflies in her stomach were multiplied tenfold now that they were highlighted by his light tan.
MC internally begged herself to stop ogling him before she fell further under his spell (if that was even possible, considering how head over heels she was for him).
She poured herself another drink and cleared her throat, “You said you wanted to catch up over drinks, right? Go ahead. Tell me about yourself.”
As Sebastian spoke, MC found herself captivated by the way he carried himself – his confidence unaltered after all these years, and the assurance with which he gestured. There was an understated magnetism in the way he spoke, a reflection of the man he had become since they last parted. As he easily recounted all he had achieved, MC marvelled at the beauty of the journey that had transformed him into the person sitting in front of her.
And so, MC listened attentively, desperate to know everything she had missed about him. She thus learnt that, after Hogwarts, Sebastian had joined the Auror recruitment programme. His first reason was that it was a profession he was passionate about, and that allowed him to do what he loved all day long. The second reason – and perhaps the most important – was because he knew that this career would help him to achieve noble things. In other words, it was his way of making amends for all the mistakes he had made in the past, in the hope that Anne would eventually forgive him too (which had taken a long time, but eventually worked out).
After having been accepted into the programme, Sebastian knew that he would not be able to stay in Feldcroft, firstly because the cottage held too many painful memories, but also because it was now Anne and Ominis' shared home. Consequently, he had found himself a small studio in London, not far from the Ministry. However, even after spending several months there, it just never felt like home to him. He resented the lack of green space, and the fact that he always had to check that none of his Muggle neighbours noticed that he was a wizard. So he moved again.
Looking for a place that was both in the heart of the Highlands and still bustling with life, Sebastian found only one possibility: Hogsmeade. The small, all-wizarding village met all his expectations, and the Ministry was easy to reach thanks to the Floo Network. And so, Sebastian moved into this small cottage, perfect for his life as a bachelor.
“So Auror Sallow, huh?” MC said playfully. “Well, can Auror Sallow win a duel against Ancient Magic Prodigy MC?”
“He sure hopes he can, since it’s supposed to be his job.” Sebastian laughed along with her.
“Do you want to put yourself to the test?” She cocked an eyebrow at him mischievously.
“You know I never shy away from a duel.” He replied with the same spark of deviltry in his eyes.
Without wasting any more time, Sebastian stood up, then turned to MC, holding out his hand to help her up. It was a simple gesture, but it was enough to make MC's cheekbones turn pink, as would any act of affection she received from Sebastian.
The two took their positions, taking a few steps apart before facing each other. It had been years since they last engaged in the exhilarating dance of magical duelling, a pastime that had once defined their youth, especially after being named Crossed Wands champions for three years running.
"Ready?" Sebastian grinned, the confidence of experience illuminating his eyes.
"Always." MC replied, wand at the ready, and they prepared to rediscover the thrill that had bound them together in shared laughter and friendly rivalry.
Ever the perfect gentleman, Sebastian let MC commence hostilities.
“Expelliarmus!”
“You're off to an easy start.” Sebastian laughed after brushing the attack off with a simple Shield Charm. “Confringo!”
MC deflected the spell just as easily, smirking right back at him, “You're off to a predictable start.”
A symphony of lights ensued, as sparks and spells flew, and the air shimmered with the energy of their magical prowess. MC’s spells were fluid and controlled, a testament to the skill she had honed over the years. Sebastian, however, moved with a newfound grace and precision, his every movement reflecting the growth and mastery he had attained thanks to the Auror training.
The duelling only grew in intensity as the two friends weaved intricate spells, each trying to outmanoeuvre the other. Laughter and teasing remarks echoed through the night as memories of their youth resurfaced in the midst of their magical exchange.
After several long and intense minutes of competing against each other, Sebastian unexpectedly directed his wand away from MC, aiming instead at the ceiling, and more precisely at the chandelier hanging from it.
“Glacius!” The candles obviously failed to resist the ice and were instantly extinguished on contact, plunging the room into semi-darkness.
Distracted by the newfound refined strategy established by Sebastian – which he had no doubt learnt to put in place at the speed of light during one of his courses – MC did not notice Sebastian disappear under a Disillusionment Charm, which was all the more effective as there was hardly any light in the living room, apart from the orange flames crackling in the fireplace.
With a final, masterful flick of his wand, Sebastian cast the final blow, “Depulso.”
MC found herself propelled to the floor, her back slamming against the sofa. Judging by the underwhelming low force of the impact, it was easy to guess that he had restrained himself, so as not to hurt her.
“Looks like I've had my long-awaited revenge for fifth year. I've finally bested you in a duel." Sebastian, breathing slightly heavier but grinning ear to ear, extended a hand to help her up.
MC, refusing to admit defeat, grabbed Sebastian's hand but only to make him fall to the ground beside her. She rolled them over until she was astride him, holding him firmly down.
She grinned down at him, “Really? Because I actually think I’ve won.”
He barked a laugh, “And I think you've forgotten the rule that you're not allowed to use physical violence in a wizard duel.”
“Since when do we play by the rules?”
Their gazes met for the umpteenth time that night, but this time was different. It was as if time had come to a standstill, as if the world had momentarily stopped spinning for them, just to let them savour the closeness of the moment.
MC kept staring into Sebastian's chocolate eyes, and was truly taken aback by what she saw in them. His eyes, once full of youthful curiosity, now sparkled with a different kind of radiance. They shone with a brightness that seemed to reflect the happiness and contentment he had found in his life. The laughter lines around his eyes only enhanced their glow, and as MC looked into those bright, expressive eyes, she could not help but feel a sense of joy for the man who had evolved from the adorable teenage friend she once knew, into the confident and content individual currently lying on the ground beneath her.
In those eyes, she saw the echoes of the genuine happiness that had transformed Sebastian into the person he was meant to be, the person she should have met from the very beginning of fifth year, if only Anne had never been cursed by Rookwood.
But now Sebastian was completely fulfilled with every aspect of his life. It was as plain as the nose on his face. And the feeling was made all the clearer by the fact that his lively eyes were perfectly matched by his wide toothy grin, which shone brightly even in the middle of the darkened living room.
After eventually snapping out of her thoughts, MC pulled herself away from Sebastian and helped him straighten up, “I’m proud of you, Seb, of what you’ve become. The future Mrs. Sallow will be very lucky to have a capable man like you by her side.”
Sebastian sat down next to her on the floor, facing the fireplace, and back resting against the sofa behind them, “She’ll never be as lucky as Mr. MC will be. I hope he’ll realise he’s got the most brilliant witch of the world by his side.”
MC grabbed his arm and hugged it close to her chest, while hooking her leg over one of his. Their limbs were tangled together, clinging to each other. Sebastian seemed to have no objection to this new positioning. In fact, he seemed quite delighted as he wrapped an arm around the shoulders of the girl next to him.
“What d’you think he’ll be like, my future husband?” She asked quietly.
“He’ll have to be right for you.” He replied all too solemnly.
A small laugh escaped her, “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means it has to be someone who will know how to take care of you, and give you everything you need to be happy, without a single shred of hesitation. It will be someone who's worthy of standing by your side and will be able to protect you from any danger… so basically someone who'll be able to defeat me in a duel."
"Seems like I'll be stuck with you for the rest of my life, then." MC continued to smile, but it was no longer in amusement. It was something more akin to contentment.
Sebastian mirrored her expression, "Perhaps you will. I can’t imagine it'd be too bad, would it?"
"Apart from your occasional bad temper, I think I could take it." She rested her head on his strong shoulder.
MC was not sure whether it was the fatigue accumulated from her perpetual travels, or the feeling of being in a warm, comfortable home, or even the fact of being reunited with Sebastian (it was probably all three), but her eyelids became heavy without her even realising it, leading her into a peaceful sleep.
“I'm going to celebrate Christmas at Anne and Ominis' house tomorrow. You're coming.” Sebastian declared out of the blue, without realising that the girl had started dozing off.
“What? No, Seb, I can’t do that. I can’t just barge in when I wasn’t invited.” MC mumbled groggily.
“You don’t need an invitation, MC. It’s you. You’re always welcome.” He retorted instantly, as if it was the most common fact to ever exist. “Plus, they miss you, so they’ll be the happiest people in the world if you show up.”
“I won't even have a present to give them...” She muttered like a pouting small child, which made it impossible for Sebastian to hold back a chuckle.
“You're back. Believe me, that's better than any present you could buy.”
Sebastian's fingers subconsciously started tracing invisible shapes on her arm, effectively lulling her back to sleep.
❄∗❆∗❅⁂∗☃∗⁂❅∗❆∗❄
The next morning, MC was woken by the few rays of winter sunshine that the curtains had failed to hold back. Keeping her eyes closed to enjoy a few more minutes of rest, she rolled onto her stomach and was pleasantly surprised by the feel of soft sheets against the skin of her face. But what struck her most was that she could smell Sebastian's perfume all around her, as if she were immersed in one of the bottles.
Completely enveloped by the sophisticated fusion of woody undertones and hints of vetiver, and the enigmatic charm it carried, MC opened her eyes and realised that she had indeed spent the night in Sebastian's bed. On seeing this, MC let herself think that Sebastian had slept in the same bed as her, and that perhaps, with a little bit of luck, he reciprocated her feelings.
A flutter of anticipation flickered within her, one that prevented her from staying in bed any longer. Without wasting any more time, MC descended the mezzanine stairs to the living room, where Sebastian was already sitting on the couch, Daily Prophet in hand.
“Good morning, sleeping beauty.” Sebastian greeted her with a smile when he noticed her standing at the bottom of the stairs.
MC realised he must have been up for quite some time, for he was freshly cleaned up – the lack of stubble which had been present the previous day was testament to it – and already dressed up for the imminent Christmas reunion. He was clad in a tan windowpane shirt, coupled with a gingerbread brown vest matching his tailored pants. The choice of colours could not have been more perfect. All those shades of brown brought out all his most majestic features: his unruly yet soft hair, his freckled skin, his warm and reassuring eyes…
Sebastian was making it humanly impossible to tear one’s gaze away from his god-like appearance, and MC could not resist making a comment about it.
“Morning, handsome.” She smirked playfully back at him.
“Did you sleep well?”
“Better than ever.” MC admitted, a discreet pink tinting her cheekbones. “Just a question, though. How did I get up there?”
“I carried you, of course. Couldn't let you sleep on the floor. What kind of host would I have been?”
“And… you slept…?”
“On the couch. Just like I told you I would.” Sebastian smiled tenderly.
“Right.”
And with these few simple words, reality dawned on MC. Disappointment settled in, like a gentle snowfall dampening the warm embers of her previous hope that Sebastian harboured feelings for her.
The truth was that he had chosen the sofa over sharing the bed with her, a sign that he still viewed MC as nothing more than a friend. The girl felt her heart tug, like a reminder of why she had chosen not to be part of his life any more.
MC took a deep breath, “I'm gonna go and get ready, so we don't arrive late at Anne and Ominis'.”
“Anne likes us all to be dressed up for Christmas. We can go and buy you a dress at Gladrags, if you'd like–”
She immediately shook her head, “No, no, it's fine. Don't worry, I've got everything I need.”
MC took out her wand and pointed it at her small shoulder bag on the floor. With a simple flick, the object grew tenfold in volume until it reached the size of a suitcase. MC opened it, revealing that the bag had been enchanted to be bottomless, and she climbed inside it before disappearing. All that could be heard was the sound of her footsteps, and her bustle as she went through all sorts of outfits.
“Talk about travelling light.” Sebastian snickered.
A few moments later, MC emerged back from the suitcase as if climbing a ladder, wearing an ankle-length cotton mahogany dress. The corset hugged her waist perfectly, and highlighted her bust with its square neckline and short puffed sleeves. The dress was nothing extravagant, but the fact that it fit her like a glove was what made it so charming.
“Is this dress all right? Think it'll be nice enough for Anne?” She gave it a twirl, so that Sebastian could see it from every angle, before putting on a black cloak to protect herself from the winter cold.
“It looks great. You look great. Well, not great, actually. I mean– More like stunning. You look stunning, you do. We’re even matching. The colour, I mean. Because obviously you look better than me.” Sebastian stammered awkwardly, his cheeks tinged with a hint of shyness. “Merlin, this is awful. I need to learn to shut up.”
“It’s alright. I understood what you meant, that's the most important thing.” MC could only chuckle at his new bashfulness. She found it absolutely endearing.
Sebastian took a deep breath before speaking more clearly, “What I’m trying to say is… You're beautiful. You’ve always been.”
“Thank you, Seb.” She met his gaze, a gentle smile playing on her lips.
He tried to divert attention from his nervousness by slipping on his long black coat, and grabbing the wrapped gifts for his niece, “Ready to go?”
MC nodded in response, waiting for Sebastian to apparate them. She expected him to grab her by the arm, but instead he wrapped an arm around her waist. He brought her small figure close to him, as if he wanted to make sure that she would be comfortable during the apparition, that there was not even the slightest chance for her to get splinched.
With a loud crack, the world began to spin. Next thing she knew, MC was standing in the middle of the snowy village of Feldcroft. As she tried to right herself, she staggered slightly, dizzy from the apparition, whose effects were far more brutal when someone was doing it for you. Fortunately, Sebastian still had an arm wrapped around her waist to cradle her against him. With his other hand, he grabbed her elbow to steady her.
Once Sebastian was certain that MC was all right, he guided her towards the Sallow cottage, which she had not seen for years. From the outside, it looked much bigger than she remembered, particularly because it had an extra floor. Sebastian explained that he had helped Anne and Ominis enlarge it after their wedding, so that they would have enough room for their future family.
Sebastian was the first to set foot on the cottage porch. He hid MC behind him with his body, to create an effect of surprise, then knocked on the door. It was Anne who answered, appearing in the doorway wearing a sublime ankle-length midnight-blue velvet dress adorned with cultured pearls.
"Sebastian! I told you to buy only one present! She's going to end up spoiled rotten if this keeps up." Anne exclaimed without even greeting her brother.
"She's my only niece. Who am I to spend my money on if not her?"
"How 'bout your sister?" She raised an accusing eyebrow at him, while clearing him of all the packages in his arms.
"Ah, but I've brought a surprise for you too. Look what I found last night…" He intoned with amusement, and stepped aside to reveal MC. "A lost soul who wanted to spend Christmas alone at the Hog’s Head!"
"Oh my, MC!" Anne swiftly pulled the girl into a bear hug. "Ominis, come here!"
"What is it, sweetie?" The blond man called from afar, carrying his daughter in his arms.
Judging by the way he had stopped dead in his tracks, coming to an abrupt halt, MC knew that he had sensed her presence thanks to his sentient wand.
Sebastian decided to take his brother-in-law’s daughter off his hands, so that the two friends could reunite peacefully, "Hey, little monster! Wanna give a hug to Uncle Seb?"
Meanwhile, MC approached her old friend and spoke softly, "Hello, Ominis."
Knowing that Ominis was not very comfortable with physical contact, especially with people he did not know well, MC was not sure how to greet him. So it came as a great surprise when he made no hesitation whatsoever and took her in his arms, holding her tightly.
"I should be telling you off for disappearing... but I'm not going to. Not today." Ominis whispered in her ear.
She chuckled lightly, "I'm happy to see you too."
"Let me take your coat." He offered after pulling away.
MC untied the ribbon from her cloak, and handed it to Ominis. She then turned to Sebastian to pick up the toddler in his arms, so that he too could remove his thick winter coat.
"Hi, little princess. I'm a friend of your mummy and daddy, and your uncle Sebastian too." MC cooed in a honeyed voice. She could not help noticing that the little girl in her arms was the perfect amalgam of her two parents. She had all her mother's features, but with meadow-blonde hair and grey-blue eyes like her father.
"Unkie! Unkie!" She pouted and made big gestures with her arms to indicate that she wanted to go back to her uncle. She truly was an uncle's little girl.
"I'm here, baby.” Sebastian immediately took her back into his arms, after giving Ominis his coat, to cradle her. “You don't have to be scared of MC. She's really nice too, you know."
"Auntie?" The one-year-old asked hesitantly, reaching out to wrap her hand around MC's index finger.
"That's right, that's Auntie MC." Sebastian encouraged her. It was impressive how he naturally had his way with kids.
It may have been silly, but something as simple as being called Auntie by a child she had just met, as well as by Sebastian, awakened something in her, a sense of belonging that had been dormant for a long time. She truly felt like a fully-fledged member of this family.
Anne suddenly let out a sigh, "I'd love to be able to celebrate the reunion with you, but I've still got lots of things to do in the kitchen. Sebastian, can you look after the baby while Ominis lays the table?"
"I'll come and help you, Anne." MC declared.
"Thank you, MC. You're too kind." Anne exited the living room, followed by MC.
“So… You and Ominis, huh?” MC started once they were alone. She was sitting across from Anne at the small kitchen table which was covered in food stains from preparing the meal.
Anne immediately shook her head, “Oh, no, no. We’ll have plenty of time to talk about my marital life later. Let's talk about how you ended up here with my brother after all these years."
"We ran into each other last night in Hogsmeade. He offered me to sleep over, and we basically spent the better part of the night talking." MC shrugged.
"And?” Anne pried impatiently. “What happened?"
"Nothing. What do you want to happen?”
“Nothing. It was just a random question.” Anne replied coyly while she finished icing the Yule log. “So, update me as well. Where are you in life? Have you met anyone?”
“No, not at all. I haven't really had time for that.”
“That's a shame.”
“What – uhm – What about him?” MC did not look up from the kilted soldiers she was preparing, in an attempt to appear nonchalant. Needless to say, it was a failure.
“Who?” Anne feigned ignorance.
MC heaved a sigh, deciding to finally meet her friend's gaze, “Sebastian. Has he met anyone recently?”
Anne bit the inside of her cheek, "I think you should ask him directly."
"I'm scared it'll be awkward…"
"Well… if you want to know everything, he hasn’t courted anyone since you went away. He claims that he's not interested in dating, that he’s focusing on becoming a proper Auror first. He always finds an excuse to avoid admitting that he's already got a girl on his mind, but is too much of a coward to act upon it."
MC felt her heart skip a beat. A cold realization settled over her, making her stop everything she was doing. Her heart sank, the weight of unspoken truths pressing upon her, and she forced a tight-lipped smile, concealing the ache within as she navigated the sudden revelation that someone else was in Sebastian's heart, and it was not her.
MC swallowed thickly, "Has he known her for long?"
"Several years."
"And is she a good person? Does she treat him well?"
"He's never been happier than when he's with her." Anne admitted with a sincere smile that contrasted drastically with the unsettled look that MC was unable to disguise.
"Who is it?" She asked weakly, not entirely sure she wanted to know the answer.
"I fear that’s too much information, and that's not for me to tell. Just ask him."
Without another word on the matter, Anne gracefully pivoted, excusing herself to go back to the living room and announce that the meal was ready. MC took a moment to compose herself, swallowing the bitter pill of disappointment before joining the others in the living room.
Seated at the table, surrounded by the warmth of holiday decorations and the aroma of a festive feast, the four friends engaged in a pleasant chatter. The clinking of cutlery and laughter created a veneer of normalcy. They reminisced adventures from their time at Hogwarts, shared stories about their jobs, exchanged anecdotes about Anne and Ominis’s little one, and indulged in the delights of the Christmas meal.
“So, MC, what have you been up to during your travels?” Ominis asked as he had just finished feeding his daughter.
MC swallowed her mouthful of turkey before replying, “Well, you know, trying to explore the world and discover new places. Honestly, I’ve just been searching for a place that makes me want to stay, that feels like home.”
“And have you found that place yet?”
MC was silent for a moment. How was she supposed to explain that she had found this special place years ago, but had fled far away from it, just to search the world for something similar? Because if MC was willing to face the truth, she knew that her home was wherever Sebastian was.
Sebastian was her home.
It was quite ironic that he did not feel the same way about her…
“I… I’m not sure.” MC finally said.
“…Does that mean you’ll be back on the road again?” Ominis questioned again, but this time with caution.
“Yes. I leave tomorrow morning.” MC replied resolutely.
The clatter of dropped cutlery echoed like an unintentional punctuation to the tremendous silence that followed. Eyes widened, gazes met with uncertainty, and an unspoken tension pulsed through the room.
Anne was the first to break the palpable unease by raising her voice, “What? But you just came back! You can’t leave so soon.”
The next sound came from Sebastian's chair legs scraping the floor as he stood up abruptly and threw his napkin on the table, “Excuse me. I need some fresh air.”
His eyes did not meet anyone's as he left the table. Without even grabbing his coat, he stormed out of the house. The door slammed behind him and echoed through the deathly hush inside.
"What’s up with him? Did I say something wrong?" MC asked, disconcerted. She was completely unaware of the weight of her revelation, which had hit her friends like a tidal wave.
Anne huffed in irritation before shouting at her, "Of course you did, MC! You're supposed to be his best friend! Can't you see how cruel you're being to him?"
Ominis rested a hand on his wife's shoulder, "Calm down, sweetie. It's not her fault MC is dense."
"Hey!" The girl exclaimed indignantly, but Ominis ignored her.
"Let me put it simply for you, MC. We were all hurt when you left without saying a word, but Sebastian's been a complete wreck ever since. The usual cheerful Sebastian you know was nowhere to be found for years… until today. And that's only because you came back.”
“And now, you've just brutally told him that you plan to disappear tomorrow, and take his happiness with you! Again!" Anne insisted, determined to keep rubbing it in until realisation eventually hit the girl.
Fortunately, it worked quite quickly, but now MC did not know what to do with herself, "I... I didn't know that... I thought he’d just forget about me and move on."
"I thought you knew him better than that. Haven’t you yet realised that you're everything to him? Because it's more than time you do!"
“I… need to talk to him. Excuse me.”
MC, in turn, rushed out of the cottage, only grabbing Sebastian's coat in her haste.
The freezing air greeted her as she stepped outside, snowflakes landing on her hair and the bare skin of her arms. Thankfully, it did not take her long to spot Sebastian, who had moved slightly away from the house to lean against a tree, his shoulders hunched slightly against the winter chill.
She approached him slowly, but with a determined step, the snow crunching under her feet. She knew he had heard her by the way he straightened up, even though he seemed intent on ignoring her.
“Seb, come back inside. It’s freezing, you’re gonna catch your death.” She implored him, covering herself with her arms to protect herself from the icy wind.
“What’s it to you? You won’t even be there to see it.” He replied even more coldly than the weather, without even turning to look at her.
“…Put on your coat at least.” She insisted, extending it to him.
Sebastian took the coat from her, but instead of putting it on like expected, he draped it over her, so that she would not get cold. His hands lingered on her shoulders, which were now protected by the thick felt.
At last, he met her gaze, his eyes silently pleading with her, “Am I not good enough for you to stay? Not good enough for you to notice me?”
MC grabbed his wrists as if by instinct, “Seb, of course you’re plenty enough. You’re my oldest friend–”
Sebastian sighed in annoyance and pulled away from her, “But can’t you see it’s not enough for me?”
“…What?”
Sebastian reached into his pocket, retrieving a small velvet box. He had always imagined giving her this gift with a broad smile, but now he was opening the box with a rueful frown, to reveal a delicate ring.
“I wanted to give it to you a little after we graduated. I wanted to give it to you to confess my feelings. I wanted that ring to be a symbol of my devotion, and a promise to always remain loyal to you… Turned out life had other plans because you left the day I bought it.”
“Sebastian…” MC croaked out, doing her best to fight back the tears that threatened to fall as she stared at the magnificent jewel that was the poignant representation of all the missed opportunities and lost time.
"Now’s a good time to give it to you, I think. If you’re going to leave again, might as well be honest while I have the chance, before you run away like last time." He said acrimoniously as he placed the ring on her finger.
"Wha…” The shock took away MC's voice before she could even finish her sentence. Her eyes were riveted on the golden band. “What about the girl you like? Anne told me you were interested in someone."
"The girl I like?” He laughed humourlessly. “MC, I've been ridiculously and irrevocably in love with you since fifth year, since the day you kicked my arse in Hecat’s class. You literally knocked me off my feet. I know I didn't always show it well, but it's true, it's always been you.”
MC let out a pained grunt and hid her face in her hands in shame, "Oh Merlin, Seb... I've been such an idiot."
“Why?” Sebastian frowned.
“I've always loved you too. But I was so miserable thinking I'd never be anything more than your friend, that I decided to disappear to try and forget you.”
“And? Please, tell me it didn’t work.” His words came out desperate, almost begging.
She took his face between her hands, and lovingly caressed his cold cheeks, “It didn’t. How could I ever forget you? Being away from you only made me miss you more.”
His hands came down to rest around her waist, bringing her close to his body, in search of both solace and warmth, “It's all right. We're together now. You don't have to leave anymore. All's well that ends well.”
“Well… Not exactly all. You gave me this beautiful ring, and I have nothing to give you in return.”
“I finally have the witch of my dreams back at my side. I couldn’t dream of a better Christmas present.”
Suddenly, MC and Sebastian were interrupted by a cracking sound coming from above them. They looked up and saw a branch of mistletoe sprang out of thin air from one of the branches of the tree they were standing under, its delicate white berries shimmering in the soft glow of the surrounding lights.
Sebastian looked back down at MC, a playful smirk tugging at the corners of his lips, “Actually… I’ve just thought of a gift you could give me.”
The snowflakes descended gracefully around them, creating a magical scene that mirrored the fluttering emotions in their hearts. In that enchanting moment, with the world cocooned in a quiet hush, MC found the fiery courage and desire to close the thin gap between them. Their lips met in a passionate kiss, and their hearts were set alight, for the moment they had dreamt of most in their lives had finally become reality.
Out of enthusiasm, Sebastian tightened his grip around MC, with his arms completely wrapped around her petite frame, enveloping her in such warmth that she completely forgot they were both covered in snow. He pressed and secured her tightly against him, and lifted her off the ground. Out of reflex, the girl's hands travelled up to wrap around his neck to steady herself. Her fingertips grazed his soft curls, sending shivers down her spine.
Unfortunately, their winter wonderland moment was abruptly interrupted by the joyful cheers of their friends inside the house. MC and Sebastian reluctantly pulled away from each other, and turned in the direction of the commotion to see Anne and Ominis glued to the window to spy on them. The wand in Anne's hand was proof enough that it was she who had conjured up the mistletoe.
MC giggled, looking back at her boyfriend with stars in her eyes, and her hands resting in his chest, “Merry Christmas, Seb.”
“Merry Christmas, darling.” He answered softly before leaning in to steal another kiss from her.
MC sincerely hoped there would be another Mrs. Sallow other than Anne next Christmas, for she had finally found her home and never planned on leaving ever again.
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Part 2 : Christmas at Home (link)
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whorergal · 1 year
Text
SHE'S MINE
summary: you get attacked by ghostface but another ghostface comes in and saves you…
warnings: scream vi spoilers, language (cussing), blood, gore… typical horror stuff lol
pairings: ethan landry x fem!reader
authors note: this is my first ever imagine (and post) on here so i hope u like it >.< i want to write more so i’ll try to be active especially for ethan. also, this is pretty short so i wouldn't mind writing a part two :3
❗️: part three can be found here!
———————————————————————————
You weren't in much of a party mood unlike the rest of your friends. Really, you haven't been in the exact mood in doing much anymore. Ever since Woodsboro, you had lost a part of yourself in the tragedy that haunted you. It was unusual especially since it was nearing Halloween, your favorite holiday, that you didn't want to participate in dressing up and getting drunk as a reward. You decided to stay inside your apartment that you shared with Anika, catching up on homework that you had missed.
Tara had made it her job to text you every so often, casually updating you on the party. After a couple more short texts, they started to become more and more hard to understand which made you laugh. At least someone was having fun.
When you sat aside your phone, trying to keep all your attention on finishing your notes, your phone began to ring. You furrowed your brows when you took a glance and saw it was coming from an unknown caller. Immediately you became paranoid. You let it ring until it ended, shaking it off as a coincidence.
Ghostface was gone. There was no possible way it could've followed you and your friends to New York City. Right?
Your phone began to ring again.
Maybe it was Tara, you thought. You knew she was drunk so maybe something happened and she was borrowing someone's phone. But why wouldn't she just use Mindy's or Anika's? You tried not to think about rational answers because you didn't want to feel stupid for answering the call when you knew you shouldn't have.
"Hello?" You answered.
"Hello, Y/N," the familiar voice said back. "You miss me?"
You should've known. Well, you did know; you were just stupid enough to think otherwise. "Fuck, no," then you hung up.
Instantly, you opened your contacts and went straight for Tara's number. But, then you remembered she was absolutely hammered which meant she probably wouldn't be much help in your situation.
You scrolled mindlessly until you landed on Ethan's contact, clicking on it instantly, seeing as he was someone you confided in the most. Mindy had already told everyone her plan tonight was to get shit-faced so you weren't confident in her being able to aid you in this; neither could you count on Anika as she would be with her.
It rang for a couple short seconds which felt like eternity for you, being panicked and all. You were relying on him answering because you weren't sure how long you had until something happened.
Luckily, he answered in confusion. "Y/N, what's wrong?"
"E, I need you to come to my place now," you let out in a complete rush, the words almost slurred together.
"What?" he questioned. "Y/N/N, I can barely hear you. Are you okay?"
"Ethan, he called me. Ghostface called me."
The line went silent, only the sound of loud music and people hollering. That was until your phone began to vibrate against your cheek, startling you. You brought it down to your line of vision and saw it was the unknown caller. Or, should you say, whatever fucked up person that was behind the mask.
"Y/N, can you hear me?!" His voice came out in distress, worried something happened to you. "Hey, Chad and I heading over right now! Y/N?!"
"They're calling again," you stated simply.
"Don't answer it!" He was practically yelling into his phone at this point because he knew exactly what you were going to do. It was what almost got you killed in Woodsboro.
You didn't listen to him, deciding to hang up on him and use your remaining courage to answer the call. If you survived once, you sure as hell can survive again.
"What the fuck do you want?" You spat in anger.
"You hang up on me again and I'll paint your bedroom walls in your blood," they rushed out. "It would be a shame for your friends to find your mutilated lifeless body, wouldn't it?"
"Fuck you." You held back your wavering because although you weren't afraid, their descriptive threat made you nauseous.
"How about we play a game?"
"How about you fuck off."
"It's an easy game, Y/N," they told you. "You answer correctly and I may consider sparing your life."
You scoffed, getting up from your bed. "Fine. I'll play your stupid game."
"Great." There was a short pause. "Where in your apartment do you think I'm at?"
The confidence crumbled as now you started to feel the rising fear bubbling in your chest. "What?"
"You heard me," they said. "Where. Am. I?"
"Fuck," you mumbled to yourself. "Why don't you just come and get me, asshole? Are you too afraid?"
"The opposite." Their voice came out hushed.
Then, your bedroom door flung open, hitting harshly against your wall that it left an indent. Ghostface came running toward you, knife rose in the air, intending to plant it into your skin but you managed to dodge their attack, shoving them onto your bed as you made your escape.
You didn't get too far as they grabbed ahold of your ankle, making you face-plant into your wooden flooring. If the pain of hitting your head against the hard surface wasn't enough, the sheer agony rippling through your leg at the feeling of their knife digging into your calf was enough to make you scream. When they pulled it out, you grew enough strength to kick them in the face as you struggled to get up, finding all your energy diminishing.
Attempting to make a run for it didn't turn out well as you heard their footsteps catch up to you, causing you to throw yourself out of the way for their knife to go straight through the door.
Your apartment was pretty small. I mean, it only housed you and Anika so there wasn't much room needed which ultimately meant there wasn't anywhere else to go. Your kitchen was connected to your living room which was also connected to your hallway. It was all one open space. So, it was no surprise that they caught up to you again.
They managed to tackle you to the floor, holding you in place by stabbing you right where you had been previously, breaking through the stitches. You screamed so loud, you were concerned at the fact that your neighbors hadn't become suspicious at the sound. Where the hell was Ethan?
Them pulling out the knife hurt much worse, causing you to whine in return. But then they stabbed you in your abdomen once more, causing you to let out a choked sob. You squeezed your eyes shut, trying to release the tension as you were physically helpless at this point. You reached down, feeling the blood coat your hand as you forced them to pull the knife out of you. Using whatever energy you had left, you kicked them off of you.
You used your entire arm to hold your wounds in place as you turned to crawl away. You weren't surprised to feel them grabbing your ankle, on the leg that had been injured which made it feel ten times worse, and drag you back to them. They flipped you on your back and stared down at you for a second until they began to raise their knife in the air.
Preparing yourself for the worse, you laid there with not much else to do, waiting to be punctured for what you assumed to be the last time ever. That was until they were thrown off of you by someone smacking them in the head with the wooden cutting board Anika used to cook you two dinner. Your eyes felt heavy but you couldn't help but widen them when you saw a second Ghostface, staring down their accomplice instead of you. The sound of the wooden board clattering against the ground caused you to flinch.
The one who had previously been attacking you was shorter than this new figure. You began to crawl away again, seeing as this short distraction gave you that advantage. You were bleeding out quickly, but you didn't want give up just yet.
You made it toward your counter, glancing at them as it seemed they were having a silent conversation. That was until the shorter one attempted to attack the taller one, using their knife but they easily intercepted the stabbing by grabbing ahold of their wrist. The taller one tossed the other one carelessly against your bookshelf, causing all your shared books with Anika to fall at their collapse.
It was funny to think you were now more worried about your books well being than your own.
You cowered behind your counter, carefully watching them in total confusion. The fact one of them was defending you, which seemed to go against their whole purpose, had rendered you frozen.
There was one last silent mutual conversation until the one with the knife shook their head in what you assumed could've been anger before fleeing the scene. You followed their figure until it was gone with wide eyes.
Your breath hitched when the Ghostface that practically saved your life turned to look at you. They didn't come near you, or really move at all as they stared into your soul. There was noise coming from somewhere in the building which caught their attention, making them turn toward your door and run out as well.
You watched in surprise. What the hell just happened?
2K notes · View notes
btsgotjams27 · 9 months
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things you don't know (2) | jjk
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summary: the aftermath of jimin's party is weighing on your mind and you wonder if you have the courage to face jeon jungkook again.
✨ title: things you don't know (part 2) ✨ pairing: jungkook x f!reader | ✨ rating: PG-13 ✨ genre/au: angst | ex best friends!au | ✨ word count: 3.8k ✨ warnings: pov switch, we get to find out what happened to reader's panties, jimin's a menace, but overall a good friend :'), minor language, reader loves to threaten her friends (in a loving way ofc), jk & reader talk (properly), not really a warning but a mint mojito is a iced coffee drink not alcohol lol ✨ a/n: hi??? we're back with these two :') I didn't think anyone would like the first part that I wrote bc it was so angsty! lol but I'm so happy it was well received. i hope this gives everyone some closure. also, i'm scared of this flopping bc so many people asked for another part. i was so close to not writing it, but alas here it is. as always, i'd love to hear your thoughts. don't be afraid to drop any questions or comments. gonna go hide now, byeeee!
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✨ mini-series masterlist ✨
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~ JK POV ~
A haze of darkness loomed in the early hours of the morning. The night sky should've been clear according to the weather icons on Jungkook's phone. Could it be that his eyes are deceiving him? Were they hazy and cloudy? If he rubbed them, would the sky finally be clear? Or maybe you have blurred his vision, distorted his mind.
As if you weren’t already on his mind 24/7, 365 days for the last seven years. Your prodigal return has made him want to be close to you again, see how you were doing, and see if you had somehow found a way to forgive him. Your appearance at tonight’s party confirmed you must’ve hated him and could never find it in your heart to forgive him. At least, that’s what he thought.
On his late-night drive after dropping off Josie, he went the long way home through the city streets. He ended up at the park where you used to stargaze when you needed to clear your mind, and it was one of those nights for him.
You had taken over every fiber of his being, capturing his heart and holding him hostage. You’ve haunted him every day of his life since you left. At least when the two of you were in school, he could see you in class and the hallways, but once you left, there was no way to keep track of you, that is, until you started posting your college adventures on Instagram. He’d see your stories and how you’d come home to visit your parents and old friends, but of course, you wouldn’t see him. Why would you? He hurt you.
He replays tonight’s events—studying every word, every facial expression, your body language. He’s looking for a way to make it right, a way back into your heart. He doesn’t like it when you’re hurting, doesn’t like it when you’re mad at him, and especially doesn’t like it when you hate him.
He wished he could redo the last seven years and the moment when he decided to kiss Josie. He should've just left Jimin’s and come to yours, confessed his feelings, said how much he’d missed you, maybe even been brave enough to ask if he should go with you to college. Maybe he could’ve saved a lot of heartache for you, himself, and even Josie.
He took a deep breath, exhaling the unease lingering throughout his body. Opening his eyes, he realized the sky finally cleared out. He tucked one hand behind his head, and with the other, his finger traced constellations into the shape of animals—a little game you used to play together.
Thoughts raced through his mind: Do you still have a love for stargazing? Did you find a new spot? Did you have someone to accompany you? Or did you go by yourself? He guessed he’d never find out the answers to his questions.
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“You’re coming in late. Or early. Were you with Josie?” Jimin’s sitting at the dining table, sipping on his coffee.
Jungkook shook his head. “Just out.”
“Man, it was good to see ____, right? I haven’t seen her since we graduated. Did you catch up with her?” He shifted in his seat, his foot pushing against the table’s leg, causing his chair to lean back. He licked his lips, suppressing a smile.
“Kind of.” Jungkook shrugged.
The chair made a loud thump when Jimin leaned forward. He set his coffee aside, his eyes narrowed, hands folded. “What happened between you guys, anyway? You were so close in high school, and whenever I ask you, you always change the topic.”
Jungkook looked at his friend, hoping he’d get the drift and move on from this conversation. He wasn’t keen on being bombarded with questions this early in the morning. He pulled out a chair, the legs screeching against the floor as he buried his face in his arms on the table.
“Or you quiet down whenever I bring her up. Well, whatever happened, you should just make out—I mean makeup with her since she’s back,” Jimin suggested, grinning at his mistake.
Jungkook looked up. “I don’t think she wants to see me.”
“See her anyway.”
Jungkook raised his eyebrows.
“What? You’ll either sit here and keep wondering what could’ve been, or you can talk to her like an adult and hash things out—get everything out in the open.”
“I hurt her, Jimin.”
“So? Go and apologize.”
“I don’t think she’ll accept it.”
“It’ll be up to her to decide, but at least she’ll hear it from you.” Jimin sipped his coffee again. “And don’t think I haven’t seen you lurking on her Instagram throughout these years.” He shook his head and chuckled. “Your Instagram handle is the alphabet without ‘JK’ in it—so obvious.”
Jungkook's eyes widened. He thought he was careful all these years, hardly posting anything but random food dishes he’s cooked.
Jimin let out a hearty laugh. “Oh—you thought you were slick, huh? I’m quite the detective myself, Jeon.” Jimin pushed his chair out to stand, massaging his friend’s shoulder, shaking his head at him. “It’s time, my friend. Don’t let the past continue to haunt you.”
He lightly tapped his fingers on the table, debating his next move. He knew he had to break things off with Josie once and for all. No more letting her hover, giving into her, or letting her manipulate him. He let her have too many years of him–it was finally time to cut off the head of the snake.
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~ reader pov ~
The early morning sun peeked through your curtains, beaming rays of light reflecting off of your mirror, making you sneak a glimpse of the time on your phone.
7:30 AM. It’s too early for anyone to function like an average person.
Propping yourself against your pillows, you begin scrolling through Instagram. You were tagged in one of Jimin’s photos.
The caption read: Look who’s back.
You were tipsy when the photo was taken. You had let Jimin wrap his arm around you, kissing your cheek, as you made a kissy face at Lana, who snapped the picture.
You looked at the amount of likes and comments. Jimin was still popular after high school. Your finger tapped on ‘view all 90 comments’, and then you realized it was just Jimin and Josie arguing back and forth in the comments about you.
Rolling your eyes, you were ready to exit the app, but then you couldn’t help but notice the username of ‘abcdefghi_lmnopqrstuvwxyz’ in the comment section, also telling Josie to ‘stop.’ You recognized the username because they liked a few of your posts and had seen your stories but never interacted.
You never bothered to look at everyone who followed you, but this username was too creative not to have a look.
When you clicked on the username, their profile picture was a sunset; their bio only had an emoji of a cookie and photos of food dishes. You guessed this person was an aspiring chef. Everything they posted looked scrumptious.
A series of knocks on your door interrupted your train of thought. It’s so early. Who could be here at this hour?
You peered through the peephole, your hand ready to unlock it, until you saw it was none other than Lana. There was a burning feeling in your chest, and your jaw clenched as you debated whether you wanted to let her in. She claimed not to know who Jimin’s roommates were, and you so happened to come to the party where Jeon Jungkook lived? Coincidence? Yeah, right.
“I can hear you breathing on the other side of the door,” she said, moving back to show you she had brought coffee from one of your favorite places.
You unlocked the door knob but left the chain lock intact. Opening the door, you peeked through, staring at the coffee in her hand.
“Leave the coffee, and I shall let you live to see another day.”
Lana rolled her eyes. “I know what you’re thinking–I set you up, but I swear on my mother’s grave that I did not know Jimin and Jungkook were living together.”
You tilted your head and crossed your arms. “You are correct. I believe you set me up, and I won’t be forgiving you.”
Lana sighed, digging through her bag. “I have something else for you too.” She pulled out the very thing you were looking for last night–your blush-pink panties.
You reach out to grab them, but she withdraws, clutching them in her hand. “I did you a favor by swiping them, washing them, and getting your favorite coffee. You’re still not going to open the door for me?”
You huffed, closing the door and unlocking the chain. Crossing your arms, you stood in the way, unwilling to let her in.
She showed off her biggest grin, holding up the tray of coffee and your panties.
You grabbed the coffee before grabbing your panties, leaving the door open if she willingly wanted this to be her last day on earth.
Lana follows you, closing the door and plopping beside you on the couch.
“Anything else you need to get off your chest before you breathe your last breath?” you ask before sipping the mint mojito iced coffee. You forgot how much you loved this drink.
“Yeah. How did the conversation with Jungkook go?”
“I swear to god, you’re addicted to drama.”
“As long as it doesn’t involve me, then I’m all ears,” she beamed from ear to ear, sipping her coffee. “And I also want to make sure you’re okay.” She elbows you before laying her head on your shoulder.
You couldn’t be upset with Lana. You knew she just wanted you to heal from what happened with Jungkook.
Last night felt like a fever dream, bumping into Jungkook. He sprang up on you with no warning. You had no time to prepare yourself—your heart, for what you’d say.
It’s like you had traveled back to that 18-year-old girl watching her best friend repeatedly hurt her. The scene replayed in your mind like an endless film reel–Jungkook and Josie holding hands, finding a letter in your locker, tearfully reading it in your room, and realizing you didn’t have a friend anymore after that day.
“So?”
“He blames me for everything that happened.”
Lana’s eyes widened, and jaw dropped. She put down her coffee, got up, and pulled her hair back. “You better hold me down before I beat his ass.”
You dragged her back beside you. “Stop being so dramatic.”
“How was it your fault?”
“He said he was upset that I was leaving for college and didn’t care to include him in the conversation. Then he went to one of Jimin's parties and kissed Josie, and they started dating.”
Lana’s upper lip raised in annoyance, glancing up at the ceiling. “I'm gonna punch him and his little girlfriend in the face the next time I see them.”
“And apparently, he says they’re not together or whatever.”
She gasped in disbelief. “Not together? She was practically all over him! And he was letting her do it!”
“That’s what I said, but he says it's complicated.”
“What are you gonna do?”
“What am I going to do? Nothing? Absolutely nothing. Avoid them like the plague. What else am I supposed to do?”
“What if he comes looking for you?”
The thought crossed your mind, but you had nothing to say to him. What more did he want from you? Since he blamed you, it’s not like he’d come asking for forgiveness.
“I don’t know. Maybe I shouldn’t have moved back.”
“Stop. I'm so happy you’re back. This place is so fucking lame without you.” Lana curled herself into your couch, hooking her arm in yours.
“Yeah, I didn’t think I had to endure all this drama with Jungkook the week I returned.”
“Maybe you should just talk to him and clear the air once and for all,” Lana suggested.
“I don’t know if I can do that without strangling him.”
“I’ll bail you out of jail, don’t worry, or I can help you. We can be cellmates.”
You loved how at least one of your best friends would go to such lengths for you. “God–I don’t wanna be an adult. I don’t want to talk to him.”
“I know, but I bet you’ll feel a million times better if you do.”
You didn’t want to hear the truth but you knew it was what you needed to do. You and Jungkook had unfinished business. Maybe it’s better to just talk to him and close that chapter of your life and finally be able to move on.
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You Jiminie 🦗
JAMAN Oh, are you sliding into my DMs?
You 🙄 In your dreams
JAMAN 😂 I’m kidding. What’s up?
You Can I ask you for a favor?
JAMAN Anything for you
You Can I get Jungkook’s number?
JAMAN Huhuhu…the plot thickens
You Oh, stop it. Will you give it to me or not?
JAMAN Idk it depends.
You On?
JAMAN If I get to see more of you
You Jiminie…
JAMAN 😞😞
You You saw me once, that’s not good enough?
JAMAN Let me take you out to dinner. I want to catch up with you.
You Then I’ll never have to see you again? 🙂
JAMAN Sure…
You Fine fine fine Give me his number
You waited a few days to call Jungkook in case Jimin told him he gave you his number. You didn’t want to seem desperate; at least, it would be at your discretion. You’d be more prepared with your heart and your mind.
You sat there, staring at his name, tapping on the screen, and before you knew it, the line began ringing. Ah, fuck.
There’s no going back now.
Hello?
“Hey, Kook. It’s ___.” You can hear him shifting through the line.
Oh, hey. Jungkook cleared his throat. What’s up?
“I wanted to see if you’d be up for coffee or something. If you’re not busy, that is.”
Like today?
You hummed.
Just tell me where and what time.
“Philz Coffee at 2?”
Yeah! I’ll see you then.
You quickly ended the call. Well, the easy part was done. Now, onto the rest.
Even for a Thursday afternoon, the street where the coffee shop was located was rather crowded. You blamed the increased remote jobs and everyone flocking to work from there instead of their homes.
Walking toward the shop, you looked up to see Jungkook sitting outside with two coffees on the table.
He gave a small wave and stood when you approached him. “Hey!” His voice was enthusiastic as he flashed a warm smile, dimple on display. Jungkook gestured for you to sit.
“Do you still like mint mojito iced coffees?”
You chuckled to yourself. You didn’t think he would still remember your coffee order. “Yeah, I do.”
“Cool, figured you still did.”
You gave a half-smile.
Jungkook leaned forward in his seat, eyes on you. “So, why did you want to meet up?”
Your lips thinned before you cleared your throat. “I guess we have some unfinished business.”
“Yeah, I guess so.”
You sighed, pulling yourself together to turn to him, looking him in the eye finally. Never in a million years did you think you would be sitting here, talking. His doe eyes sparkled, his boyish charm lingered, and that sweet smile made you swoon.
“I’m gonna say my piece, and then if you have anything to add, go for it.”
He nodded, listening intently to your following words.
Closing your eyes, you take a deep breath. “When you stopped talking to me—it hurt, fucked me up for a long time. I convinced myself for years I was over it, but that wasn’t the case at Jimin’s.”
It felt weird to finally say everything that had been building up aloud in front of him.
“It was hard going through college without you. I couldn't talk to you when I wanted, come over when I was bored, and experience new things with you. It was like this big piece of my life was missing, and no one could fill it. Sometimes, a song would come on shuffle that reminded me of you; then I'd get sad because I didn't know your new favorite songs or if you had seen the new Marvel movie.”
Most of all, you missed his presence and how he’d light up when he was excited to show you something or how he’d put a smile on your face when you were down.
“You were my best friend, Kook. I shared everything with you. So it hurt when you felt like you couldn’t talk to me. I would’ve understood if you couldn’t be friends with me because of Josie—I mean, it would’ve sucked big time, but I would never want you to feel like you can’t be honest with me.”
Jungkook stayed quiet for a bit before responding. “I’m sorry about what happened. I was hurting too, and I guess I wanted you to hurt too.”
“Well, it worked.” You let out a sad chuckle; your hand began playing nervously with the coffee cup before you.
He looks at you, scanning your face. “This might not mean anything now, but I know you. I know what songs you like, movies you watched, what made you sad and happy.”
Your gaze slowly flicked to his, your eyebrows knitted in confusion.
“I don’t want to sound like a creep or anything, but I’ve been following you on Instagram.”
“You have an Instagram account?”
“Uh, yeah. I just don’t post my face or anything.” He pulled out his phone to show you.
Your jaw dropped. “Oh my god. You’re alphabet boy?”
“Alphabet boy?” Jungkook’s forehead furrowed.
As soon as he said that, you began to piece everything together. So he was on social media. He was just good at hiding it.
“So, you’ve been keeping up with everything I’ve been doing?”
“You were my best friend. I missed you and wanted to know what your life was like.”
You didn’t know how to process this information. You had been lurking on Instagram, trying to get a glimpse of Jungkook, but after all these years, he was trying to keep a part of you with him.
“Just because you’ve liked my posts or watched my stories doesn’t mean you know me.”
He nodded in agreement. “You’re right. I don’t, but I would like to get to know you again.”
“What about Josie? What is she going to think?” You didn’t want to get in the way of whatever they had going on.
“I’ve tried breaking up with her multiple times, and she keeps on coming back, and I’m pretty dumb for letting her back in. I think we’ve just gotten into that rhythm where we’ve been comfortable with each other that it’s hard to let it go, you know?”
You chuckled to yourself. He was never really good at speaking up, was he?
He looks at you. “Do you think we can start over?”
You take a deep breath. “I don’t know. I—I don’t think I can lose you as a friend again.”
“You won’t,” he responded immediately.
You liked how sure he was of himself. That nothing or no one could get in the way of a new friendship again. But with Josie still in the picture, you didn’t think it would be as easy as he was making it seem.
A car drives by, music playing loudly from their speakers. It stopped the conversation, giving you time to think.
A part of you would love to be friends again, and the other part was ready to let go and start fresh. You weren’t the same person you were in high school. You had grown up, lived, and loved a little, and after finally getting to speak everything you’ve held onto—you were ready to close that chapter you had kept open for so long.
Jungkook waved his hand, calling out to you.
“Hmm?”
“What happens now?”
You shrugged, and your mouth twisted to the side. “I don’t know, Kook. How about we just take it one day at a time? And I don’t mean like we talk every day or something, but if we see each other, we’ll be able to say ‘hi.’”
Jungkook nodded. “Baby steps.”
“Right. Baby steps.”
“I can do that.”
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JAMAN Dinner. Friday. 6 PM.
You Why, hello, Jimin.
JAMAN Right, hi. Dinner. Friday. 6 PM. Be there.
You You didn’t tell me where.
JAMAN My place.
You Is Jungkook going to be there?
JAMAN No, he’s outta town. Going somewhere with Josie.
You tut. Of course, he hasn’t broken it off with Josie. Why would he? No one changes within a week, right?
You Okay, fine. See you on Friday. Can I bring anything?
JAMAN Just yourself 😘
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Friday.
JAMAN Hey, I’m running late from work. But make yourself at home! I’m going to grab some food on the way back, too.
You Am I supposed to break in?
JAMAN Oh, you silly girl. The code is 0613.
You ‘Kay, see you soon.
You couldn’t believe you agreed to come to Jimin’s place for dinner. Meeting up somewhere would’ve been safer if you bumped into Jungkook again. But you two did decide to take baby steps.
Keying in the code, you stepped in, eyes wandering around the house. Surprisingly, it was well-kept. No throw pillow or blanket is out of place. All the coasters were neatly lined up. Even the house plants were flourishing.
You closed the door, then heard a shatter of glass hitting the ground along with a ‘fuck’. You didn’t see any cars outside when you arrived. Maybe Jimin was dropped off.
“Hello? Jimin?”
You walked into the kitchen, peering around the corner, and saw someone’s head bobbing up and down.
“Kook?”
He looked up with doe eyes, and his jaw opened. “Oh—hey.”
“What are you doing here?”
Jungkook furrowed his eyebrows. “I live here,” he said slowly, sweeping the glass in a dustpan.
“Yes, I know that. But where’s Jimin?”
“Jimin’s at work. He asked me to make dinner.”
You huffed, throwing your head back. “Did you plan this?”
“Plan what?”
“This. Us. Dinner.”
“What? No. I didn’t know you were coming over.”
Your phone buzzed in your back pocket.
JAMAN Oh, hey, friend. I can’t make it to dinner. Guess you’ll just have to eat with Kook. 😘😘
You I’M GONNA BLOCK YOU PARK JIMIN
JAMAN 😘 I love you.
“I’m—just going to go. See you later, Kook,” you said, turning around to leave.
“Where are you going?”
“Home. Bye, Kook.”
“Why don’t you stay? I already made dinner and don’t want it to go to waste.”
You stopped in your tracks. Whatever he made smelled good.
He set down the dustpan and walked over to you. “Come on. It’s just dinner.”
You turned back to him, scanning him from head to toe. Why did he have to look so boyfriend in his all-black outfit and matching baseball hat?
You pointed your chin to the ground, staring at him. “Just dinner.”
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✨ read part three ✨
541 notes · View notes
velvetures · 3 months
Note
Helluuuu!! I saw your post about sending requests and mine is actually a really simple one cause I don't have a creative but I just though about a ghost hurt/comfort story
Little Secrets
A/N: So this is very self-indulgent... I hope you don't mind. I think there are quite a few people who struggle with taking meds for depression/anxiety or feel guilty for it. Me included. Hopefully, this helps everyone feel valid, seen, and supported. Summary: Task Force 141 is where you belong. But it doesn't make the work easy by any means. You finally get the help you need and try hiding it. Ghost notices and is the one who sets you straight. T/W: depression/anxiety themes, medication, guilt, insecurity of reader, fem reader, and I'm sure I've missed something, so let me know.
photo by: pedropcl
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You couldn't keep fighting it for any longer.
Staring down at the two orange bottles of pills in your hands and the directions packets in the other, you felt like you'd failed despite the psychiatrist you'd spoken to reassure you that this was certainly not a failure. Your brain kept refuting that this was a step in the right direction. Working as a professional and legal murderer should've meant you had no feelings. No failures of regulating your emotions or having such miserable trouble falling asleep at night. That nice woman who'd put the prescription in for you said it would take two to three weeks to see a difference. It felt like no time, yet an eternity all at once. Relief felt so far away, but insignificant compared to other people you often compared your personal struggles with.
You weren't homeless, you could eat without worrying, you had clothes and shoes all of the time, and never needed to wonder if you would have enough money to take care of your responsibilities. Education hadn't been a problem, you were well-respected despite being a woman in such a male-dominated field and kept up with your work extremely well. At least, when your brain decided to deny that you had the ability to do anything. Or... repeatedly try to convince you that nothing you did was worth a damn or actually made you useful. Vicious cycles of fighting with your own brain, knowing that you shouldn't feel or think this way but have no strength or way of stopping. None of the "hacks," meditations, or affirmation bullshit touched that panicky feeling you had mere minutes after laying down at night.
The pills shaking around in your hands were your last resort. And they made you feel so fucking embarrassed as you tucked them in your pockets before entering back into HQ. Praying to god that none of the 141 would see you with them or hear that slight sound of them rattling in their bottles. By grace or luck, you were able to avoid all of them and got back to your quarters to stash them under your bed in a small ammo box repurposed for some personal belongings. The directions you'd thrown away on your drive back, just taking a picture of them for reference and ditching the paper copies so you wouldn't have to keep track of those.
"This better fucking help," You breathe out heavily to yourself.
Staring up at the ceiling and almost dreading having to take one tonight before bed and the other when you wake up the next morning. Daily reminders of how you couldn't be hard and cold like the others. Cool and collected like Gaz, confident like Soap, unaffected like Ghost, or just so very reliable like Price. It made you feel like the weak link needing support. You'd never needed it before, and within two years you'd suddenly realized that your own mind was winning in a fight you'd never even been aware of fighting in the first place.
Keeping all of them in the dark about this would be safest. If they didn't need to question your stability, then it wouldn't feel like such pressure to perform. And hopefully, after a few weeks, things might start to shift a little. Maybe enough to where you could begin sorting out the other problems without the image of a cluttered attic representing the state of your head. Taking care to not raise the alert of the 141 wouldn't be easy. Always noticing everything out of sheer training and sharpened instincts. Having no other good ideas... You just settled on doing everything you could to keep your little secrets under wraps.
In the following couple of days, you’d become adjusted to the routine of taking your medications on the surface level. While the one tasked with easing you anxiety and depression wasn’t going to take effect for quite a while longer the other -a sleeping aid- was definitely making a significant impact. You were able to actually fall asleep and stay that way, problem was, with a couple missions impending in the near future, you were getting concerned that if you took them when you were supposed to -on a schedule- that staying awake would be next to impossible. And if you didn’t take them at all… you didn’t want to deal with the consequences of breaking a much more healthy habit.
And the reason you were so worried about the missions was because of a reoccurring problem that the 141 began finding you falling victim to. Thankfully you were all on leave, making it a lot more acceptable, but they still began walking into different rooms around HQ to see you sleeping soundly. No matter the noise level, temperature in the room, or the space you’d fit yourself into. And no one was quite as intrigued with your sudden change in behavior was the Lieutenant.
Ghost liked things to have order, and often used regiment or habit as a very small form of comfort when he felt that his physical situation was one that could be trusted. And while the others just thought you’d found a new safety in HQ and enjoyed sleeping somewhere safe, Ghost could see that something much different was happening. Your sleeping wasn’t a new habit.
It appeared far too quickly, and you oftentimes didn’t look like you had much control over it. There had already been three times where he’d watched you fall asleep on one of the guys late in the evening without as much as a single attempt to fight the drowsiness. While Ghost didn’t like to think that he cared that much about you, he found himself paying even closer attention to you than he had before.
“There she goes…” Soap chuckled quietly, pointing to you on the couch; head laying in Captain Price’s lap, eyes closed and sleeping deeply with your arms tucked against your chest and lying on your side.
Price had a loving hand on your head, and had been idly petting your hair much like a father would despite being hardly of age to act it. Yet, Ghost felt that Price’s warmth towards you wasn’t the entire reason you had yet again fallen asleep before 11 o’clock. Purposefully he’d been keeping count, and this was the fifth time in a week. More than enough to raise alarm with the others… but he was still waiting silently for someone else to bring it up.
Price chuckled, glancing down at you. “I carried her to bed last time,” His pointed look at each of them was more than enough to guess what he was about to say. “Someone else needs to, otherwise you’ll be voluntold.”
Ghost internally groaned. Not only was that kind of behavior what made people soft, but it also made seeing through the mask of affection far more difficult. But before Soap or Gaz took initiative, the Lieutenant was up on his feet and approaching Price with every intention of being the one to take you back to your quarters. Looks got thrown around the room, and Ghost wasn’t stupid enough to not notice. It was the first time he’d gotten this involved, and there was certainly a spectacle of him picking you up carefully enough to not wake you.
Even though he was quite certain it would take a lot more to get you up than that.
Your door opened up into warm, glowing light from a little lamp you’d left switched on. He catches sight of your quilt on the bed and the little rug that made the polished concrete floors look so much less like the jail cell his own quarters resembled. The whole room smelled like you too. Sweet, and a lot like cinnamon rolls. Probably some type of candle or other smelly thing that you had thought was worth spending money on. Plenty more reasons added to the list of what separates the two of you. Debating your differences or the reason you preferred your quarters smelling like a bakery wasn’t his purpose for bringing you back to your room.
But even with laying you down on your bed and pulling the sheet and blankets over you, Ghost wasn’t seeing any of the possible signs that could lead him to better understand what was going on with you. Nothing is out of place though. Your room is pretty much spotless save for a sleep outfit you’d laid out for tonight, but wouldn’t have the chance to get changed into. And right about the time Ghost decided he’d been looking into your business too much, he bumped into your nightstand.
It knocked something off into the floor, bouncing under the bed and clattering a bit.
Ghost sighed, eyes rolling up towards the ceiling and having quite the frustrating experience of dealing with the sudden responsibility of making sure you were cared for. And that meant picking up whatever shit he’d been too busy watching you, to not knock somewhere under the bed he’d have to fish around and find. So he knelt down and pulled his phone from his pocket and used the flash to spot a tube of chapstick near the bed frame foot.
That, and an ammo box with your initials spray-painted onto the side of it.
Compared to everything else, it didn’t look like it fit amongst the rest of your things. And damn if Ghost didn’t have a sudden gut feeling that it was the reason you’d been sleeping so much. Why you’d been so out of character; Setting his teeth on edge. Reaching out… Ghost grabbed the lip balm and got back to his feet and sit it down on the nightstand where it couldn’t be as easily disturbed again.
“G’night kid.” His whispers fell on your unconscious ears as your Lieutenant dismissed himself from your room and back down to his own space.
***
You woke up in your bed after falling asleep somewhere unintentionally, for the who-knows-which time. Just like before, left in whatever clothes you’d been wearing and all of your blankets tucked up tightly around you. It left a lingering sense of disappointment in yourself. A little pinch of sadness rested like a rock in your stomach. You couldn’t really remember falling asleep to begin with. If you ended up keeping this little habit going, there’d be no doubt you would risk everyone on a mission falling asleep at the drop of a hat.
All because of this damn medicine.
One that you needed to grab from under your bed, and sneak into the kitchen so that you could have some water and food. You'd seen one of the tens of sites -during your research of your pills- that it would help digest it better... whether it actually worked or not wasn't something you could tell. But either way, a doctor had said it, and plenty of people taking it agreed. So you grabbed the pill, shoved it in your pocket, and went out into the kitchen to find a glass.
The floors felt cold even with socks on. And while a steady rain poured from the sky, you were more heated with concern that someone would notice you. Notice your sleeping issues, the way you crawled around in the morning for the first couple hours before the pills began working, or the shady way you hid your face in the refrigerator while swallowing down your medication. Surely the stuff had to be working since you'd not been struggling to get your work done throughout the day. But maybe that was the hard part. Taking pills to fix your head, but needing your brain to recognize whether or not you felt better.
"Oh god help me..." You mutter quietly, searching past Soap's energy drinks and Gaz's revolting jug of green juice to find something you could make for breakfast.
A cabinet door shutting behind you nearly stopped your heart. Seeing Ghost's dark eyes evaluating your reaction didn't make your heart rate drop back to normal either. In his typical day-off wear, a pair of well-worn jeans hung low on his hips and an old SAS t-shirt you'd seen him wear countless times stretched tightly over his chest and shoulders. No doubt he'd been up since four. Quite certain he never actually slept, you wondered momentarily if he could benefit from the sleeping tabs you took. But quickly that got covered in anxiety when his eyebrows furrowed at your expression.
"Nothin' to eat?" He asked with a smooth voice, nodding to the refrigerator door you still held open dumbly.
"N-no... just a bunch of shit drinks." You reply, letting the door shut and noticing that he's got a brown bag with grease spots at the bottom corners. He just nods, looking off into the empty common room. Like he's trying to think of the right way to talk shit about both Gaz and Soap's bad choices in hydration.
"Sit. I've got enough to share." He jerks his head to the other side of the counter, turning that wide back to face you, leaving no room for argument.
You're swallowing down a thick bite of a bagel with god-knows-what in British style as Ghost brews tea. Silently making you a cup as well and standing stiffly with both milk and sugar on the table with the expectancy that you tell him how you like it. Not really unusual behavior from him... typically you get along just fine. But it's the fact that he watches so heavily.
"Just sugar, please." You say through a mouthful, covering your mouth with your hand.
He nods, but then starts putting the sugar in, mentioning something about fucking Americans before sliding the mug closer to you with a couple of fingers. Those damned eyes are just as observant as ever when you crumple up the finished sandwich before he even steeps his own drink. It made you nervous. Wondering if those pills were helping with your appetite too. The psychiatrist said it could; Something about feeling less stressed can give your body more opportunities to worry about being hungry. It was one of those facts on the medication packet you'd taken pictures of.
"Plans for today, L.t.?" You ask, sipping the tea, eyes grazing over the cup rim as you stare at the back of his head.
Mask rucked up high enough to eat and drink freely he nods his head. Leaning his lower back against the edge of the kitchen counter
and resting one hand back.
“Yeah, you?”
You shake your head uselessly, “No. Maybe some laundry, but I’m not really even due. Wouldn’t be worth the water in the machine.”
He hums lowly, taking a drink of his tea. You can hear his swallow and a steady exhale of air that follows. Whether it’s him cooling off the steaming cup or just breathing, you cant tell. But it’s so steady that you actually mimic the tempo of it. Feeling the way it expands and contracts your lungs smoothly. Almost settling. Much like L.t. himself in that way. Terrifying until you see just how easily you can be around him. He’s always quiet and composed, even when there’s plenty of reasons not to be. You wished it was something you could do too. Maybe it would help the task force if you didn’t have to spend your energy keeping yourself at an unnoticeable level of consistent panic.
“Know anythin’ about cars?”
“No,” You’re quick to add on. “But I can learn fast.”
You watch the way the back of his mask slides down further and how his head tilts from side to side to settle it comfortably. Seeing the rest of the tea get dumped into the sink and his own sandwich bag get crumpled up. He’s silent as he washes the cups used and methodically cleans up after the pair of you. Even reaching across the counter to swipe a couple of crumbs off your t-shirt with a subtle nod to his own satisfaction.
“I like to hear it,” His hand palmed at the back of your neck. Gently tugging you off the barstool, and grabbing your jacket to toss it to you. “You’re comin’ with me then.”
Learning about cars actually became quite easy… when Ghost was teaching.
He explained the parts clearly, what his goal was, and didn’t get pissed when you handed him the wrong size socket wrench on the first try. On the other end, you’d only been working next to him -well, sitting on the wheel well- for a couple of hours when you started getting tired again. Almost helpless to your own frustration, you yawned. Fighting the sleepy feeling valiantly, and taking as detailed of mental notes as possible while watching Ghost’s greased knuckles tighten a bracket holding his master cylinder in place. Surely it was a cosmic joke. L.t. was fixing his brakes, and it felt like someone had stomped on yours.
“Hand me that,” He muttered, head stuck down in a gap between his engine block and alternator, still effortlessly pointing at a pair of channellocks. “And get in for me.”
You did as he asked, yawning one more time. Trying to blame your sudden exhaustion on the rain pelting the metal roof above you. Sliding into the back of the car and kicking off your boots to let them rest on the concrete floor outside of it. Attempting to be polite by not getting any dirty spots on the mats of the -very original- DB4 GT Aston he’d given you trust to even sit in. The leather seats help you glide into the driver’s seat, giving you a very slim look at Ghost through the gap in the hood.
“What exactly am I doing in here?” You ask, loud enough so that he can hear you.
It prompts his head to pop up from inside the engine bay, giving you those same, observant eyes from earlier. He looks back down, reaches in and taps on something harshly, then looks back to you.
“Roll it over.”
The car starts effortlessly. Practically purring under you, and echoing in the metal hangar making it sound all the more ruggedly beautiful. The whole car hums, and as you watch Ghost go back to focusing on something in front of him, you feel the heat come through the dash. It’s a perfect storm that lulls you even closer to sleep. A dangerous thing, considering the one man who could figure out what was wrong with you was the only one close enough to see. Hell, you weren’t even sure he didn’t already have it figured out, and wasn’t planning some way to tell Price about it and have you removed from the task force.
Unfit for duty.
You could just picture it now. Red pen in Price’s handwriting detailing your medications and how it was grounds from honorable discharge. Perfectly common in the military, but it felt like death in your hazy mind.
Not that you could fight it for much longer.
Because by the time the Lieutenant had finished his little bit of work, he came into sight of you, slumped over in his driver’s seat with you lips parted and your arms wrapped around yourself. Nothing short of a pretty sight for sore eyes. His car had damn near rocked you sleep, and for once, Ghost felt his heart couldn’t take the feeling of waking you up. He’d watched you all morning. Gauging your reactions, your lack of conversation, and the way you tried to keep from showing him any sign of being tired. Initially he wanted to be angry. Mad that you were hiding something from the team… from him. But seeing you sleeping there, he knew there was a fight in your head. A fight he knew well. So he left you there to sleep.
Turning off the engine to keep from filling the garage with exhaust, but pulling up one of the small space heaters close to the open door to keep you from getting cold while he worked. Making small adjustments, looking over future jobs, and even entertaining the thought of adjusting you over in the seat a little bit so that he could drive-test his handiwork. But that didn’t come, because Soap arrived with a grin on his face and no idea that you were sleeping.
Until Ghost told him to lower his goddamn voice.
“Sleepin’ again bonnie?” Soap chuckled to himself, looking at you before back to Ghost. “How long’s she been out?”
Ghost shrugged, “Few hours.” Really he hadn’t been watching the clock; far too comfortable to concern himself with it.
“I know you’ve been tryin’ to figure it out,” He started back, resting his hands on the hood. “Why she’s doin’ this so much. Have ya’?”
Ghost shook his head. “No. Not yet, but I’m not concerned.”
Johnny laughed softly, slapping Ghost on the back and beginning to walk away. “I never took you for the type to be worried, L.t.. But since you’re so reassurin’ I’ll take it t’heart.”
Any way Ghost came at that statement, he felt himself on the end of a losing battle. Maddening. Losing a fight wasn’t in his nature. Even if that meant he had to take some of the most fucked up torture to reach it. But what bothered him more than Soap knowing he was concerned about you was the knowing you weren’t okay.
Days out in the field were bad enough. But when they got worse, you were always there. And maybe you didn’t feel much better than he did, yet you always held softness. For everyone. For him. A kind of understanding and acceptance that wasn’t required, or exactly approved of in this line of work. You could keep a secret better than anyone he knew, and while he didn’t burden you with a single one of his, there was always the foreign comfort in being able to come with them if he wanted to. Hiding your own feelings wasn’t right though.
Selfish maybe. Thinking it was okay to linger in his own issues and still demand you give him yours.
But hiding behind his rank and position over you meant he could make that kind of decision without any questioning. A type of don’t fucking ask why that saved him face when carrying you from his car back to your room after you still hadn’t woken up nearly seven hours after passing out in his car. Shouldering open the door just like the night before, he expected to see nothing out of place. The same lip balm on the side table, the same rug, and maybe a different night shirt since you’d mentioned doing laundry. But there was something out of place. And damn if it didn’t make his gut twist up in a ugly kind of feeling. One he’d not felt in years, but certainly recognized as soon as he spotted the orange pill bottle sitting on your bed.
It made sense.
The sleeping. The different behavior. The reason you’d practically swallowed a whole fucking sandwich for breakfast when a cup of tea would typically be all you stomached until afternoon. And thank god… you were finally starting to look a bit fuller. Getting prettier every day, and he finally had something to place the blame on. All hesitations about you being able to handle the upcoming missions faded once he got a good look at the bottle. A medication, funnily enough, that Ghost was well-acquainted with. It wasn’t part of his own personal line-up in his medicine cabinet, but it was one he’d taken for a while.
You’d been in need of some help, and luckily for you, it hadn’t been nearly as hard for you to get help as it had been for him. Actually asking for what you needed -and while frustrating- decided to try and manage it without anyone else’s knowledge. Ghost couldn’t think of a better scenario. Realizing that the only thing he needed to know about was your side effects, and how to best manage them alongside you. Thank fuck you weren’t sick… well… sick in a way that someone couldn’t help you with. A way that he couldn’t help.
So, he sit down in on the floor in your room and waited.
Your wake-up call came in the form of sleepy eyes opening to see the massive silhouette of Ghost sitting in your floor. Dark eyes much softer than you’d expected, and a much more concerning sight of your pill bottle resting in his massive hand. A sight that sat you up ramrod straight in your bed, gasping softly and staring at him with wide eyes.
“Don’t tell Price.” You sputter, rushing to get the words out of your mouth. Terrified that he’s going to get up and run out the door. Just sitting long enough to let you get a good look at his plan before exposing you to the Captain as some sick kind of satisfaction.
His eyes narrow a little, “Don’t tell Price?” His voice sounds hoarse. “Don’t tell Price?”
It sounds that much more broken and gritty when he repeats it. Standing up to meet you a bit more level, fisting the pills in his hand, and lightly making them shake. He can’t understand your fear. Completely blind to the fact that -much like him- you’re fearful of being shamed. Misunderstood for it. Or worse. Ghost can’t recognize why you’re looking at him as if he’s going to be the reason your life ends. When in all reality, you don’t see how he’s trying to figure out why you didn’t feel safe coming to him.
“You’ve been takin’ these… fallin’ asleep on everyone, and-and struggling for who knows how the fuck long…” It’s hard for Ghost to keep his tone even, thinking about it. “Why didn’t you tell me. you should’ve told me. Said something. Anything.”
Caving in on itself, your chest burns. Eyes locked on his and scanning every confusing moment of emotion and each shift as it comes and goes.
“You wouldn’t…”
Ghost takes a fast step closer, “I wouldn’t what?” His hand drops the pills on the bed and quickly grabs your face, soft fingers pressing into your jaw. “I wouldn’t get it? I wouldn’t do what you needed me to? Wouldn’t let you sleep on me?”
Your lips open in surprise at the softness in him. All of him. The gentleness of his fingers, how his eyes lay silkily on you. Even his voice, falling so softly despite it’s rough tone and deep sound, feels like he’s terrified of you being scared away from him. Like that gentle hold on your face is all he can manage, and he’d rather do anything other than let you pull away from it.
“You have to know…” he starts weakly. “You have to know that - that I would do… anything you needed me to. Anything to make this easier for you. Even somethin’ small, I’d do it for you, honey.”
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whereireid · 1 year
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˚ · . 𝐒𝐌𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐄𝐃 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐁𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐒
𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: dark!steve rogers x fem!reader | masterlist
SUMMARY: Is it hard being married to the most influential man in America? You most certainly think it is. — Steve Rogers: Captain America, the heart of his nation, the soul of his country. After returning home from a particularly bad day at work, Steve finally snaps, deciding you need re-educating on how to be the perfect housewife.
warnings: dubious consent ! (reader does consent but it can be interpreted otherwise) fingering, oral [m recieving] manhandling, — arguments, swearing, verbal insults, toxic ideas of marriage [nuclear family, gender roles] mentions of post-partum depression.
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Some may say a clean home creates a clean mind. Others say, happy wife, happy life. Steve Rogers strives for both of these things.
Because in Steve Rogers' line of work, it's tiresome to return home to a messy house, a dissatisfied wife, and a crying baby. Exhausting is actually probably a better term. Constantly picking up dirty laundry which should've been thrown in the washing machine days beforehand, not managing to eat dinner because there is no dinner prepared for him, having to listen to a screeching baby which pierces his ears and makes his head throb.
It is hard. Steve Rogers has enough to deal with at work, what with saving the world and actually representing the entire nation of America as a whole. And you? His cute little suburban housewife, who he slaves around for at his job just so he can shroud you in bliss and heaven? You just don't seem to get that. You cry and wail over your position as a mother, saying that it’s too much to handle and that the workload is too much.
The fucking workload. By which, you mean doing the dishes and the laundry and occasionally cooking dinner. Meanwhile, Steve will come home from work, after fighting off actual terrorists and criminals, sometimes even aliens, to a home that is so messy it looks like it’s just been broken into. And he’ll try to be rational - argue that it is hard for you because you’re dealing with your son, and that you’re a first-time mom, and that James has inherited his dad’s serum which has made the four-month-old a stupidly advanced little shit. And Steve does admit this - your son is very good at pushing buttons and misbehaving and throwing tantrums, but that’s what kids do. You knew this. But still, he'll try to be rational - because you're perfect in every other way and it must be so hard to manage this, but then also...
...It shouldn’t be that hard to stay on top of things. And then, when Steve will come home and try to rest - when he drops on the sofa tiredly, unable to hold back the temptation to succumb to hours of missed sleep, you’ll call over to him: “Stevie, can you put food in the oven? I forgot," with no apology! - Hell, no genuine sincerity either! Yet, like the good husband he is, he'll do it - no questions asked, and then you'll follow up with, "oh, and stick the washing machine on, please! And maybe the dishwasher too, whilst you’re at it?”
...It shouldn’t be that hard to stay on top of things. And then, when Steve will come home and try to rest - when he drops on the sofa tiredly, unable to hold back the temptation to succumb to hours of missed sleep, you’ll call over to him: “Stevie, can you put food in the oven? I forgot," with no apology! - Hell, no genuine sincerity either! Yet, like the good husband he is, he'll do it - no questions asked, and then you'll follow up with, "oh, and stick the washing machine on, please! And maybe the dishwasher too, whilst you’re at it?”
He'll do all of it. He won't even say a word. Won't mutter a complaint. Then you'll both sit in silence as you eat, not even a "oh, how was your day, Steve?" or a kiss on the cheek. Two seperate showers, two separate bedtime routines - the only time the two of you really talk is when you both put James to bed, but then, what? You'll drag yourself to your bedroom, and Steve will put his hands on your bare thighs needily, his cock so hard in his pants it actually hurts, only for to waft him away and say you're tired and need sleep? Only for him to wait until you're breathing softly next to him to go on his phone and look at the photos of you he has saved when you're bare and naked, sultry and ready for him?
God, what has happened to him? Is this what fatherhood is?
Steve can deal with all of this. He thinks you're depressed - he's pretty sure of it, actually. Post-partum depression is what they call it. He's asked you to see a doctor - no, has begged you to, but to no avail. So he sits and watches as you cry and stress, soothing you at every possible opportunity, only to have his head bit off for doing so.
Today has been rough. So rough that Steve’s actually pondered whether coming home would be more beneficial to him than drinking his sorrows away at a bar, despite the unbelievable curse that he can’t get drunk. He decides the former – you might need him, and he's hoping that you're going to put a pip in his step. There's no-one he needs more when he's down than you. And he's sure it will be fine, because a happy wife allows for a happy life!
Right?
Wrong. Steve pinches the bridge of his nose and lets out an exasperated sigh as he gazes over his living room. It is a state, and he's wondering how it looks exactly like an actual bomb has gone off. No. It looks worse - there’s shit everywhere. Toys and baby clothes and an open pack of clean diapers lay scattered around the living room floor, and he’s almost certain there’s apple sauce on the white rug that he spent $5,000 fucking dollars on.
“Sweetheart, what is this?” It genuinely feels like Steve’s heart is about to be pulled out of his chest. Like someone’s actually ripping their hands into him and scratching away at his heart like a deranged psychopath. Is disappointed even the word? Is angry better? “What the hell is on this rug?”
When you appear from the kitchen, running out wildly, hand movements frantic in concern, Steve genuinely winces. You look a mess - exhausted, worrisome, and on the brink of collapse. When Steve always pictured coming home to you as his housewife, he’ll be honest, he never imagined this. “On the rug?” You wheeze, cursing softly as you graze a wet rag over the applesauce stain. “I have no idea. It isn’t - shit - it isn’t coming off.”
“It looks like applesauce. It - it doesn't matter,” Steve reassures, wrapping his hands around your shoulders. When you ignore him, rubbing harder at the stain, he repeats, “doll. It doesn’t matter. I’ll just - I’ll go and buy a new one.”
“No, Steve. We can’t afford a new one right now. I have to get this out.”
“What do you mean, we can’t afford one right now? Of course we can - just - Jesus, doll, stop it!”
The sudden reminder that Steve is much, much stronger than you suffocates you in a wave when he lifts you up by the underneath of your arms. You wail pathetically, defeatedly, dropping the damp rag on the rug, admitting that attempting to salvage it is a lost cause.
Silence prods at the air. When Steve finally lets go of you, he puts his hands on his hips and sniffs slightly. How the hell has he let this happen?
“Is dinner almost ready?” his voice sounds hoarse as he speaks, and he genuinely feels like he could cry when you answer,
“No.”
“Right. Okay.” A shaky breath slips past Steve’s lips, and his shaking hands find their way into your hair. He rubs your scalp softly, caringly, as one does to their partner if they’ve had a bad day - though he’s almost certain that his had been worse. “Is dinner even prepped, doll?”
When you shake your head in response, Steve shuts his eyes. He shuts them so hard he sees stars and he tries to wash away the frustration that threatens to bubble over like a tsunami wave. It’s impossible to hold back the annoyed sigh that slips past his lips, though - it’s so dramatically loud that your head snaps up, the corner of your eyes pricking with fresh tears.
“What?”
“Nothing.” He shrugs your concern away, peppering a gentle kiss on your head, hoping that you won't press on.
Of course, though, you do.
“What, Steve?”
“I haven’t said anything, doll.” He shakes shoulders slightly, trying to brush away the anger which flickers throughout his body.
Steve hates this. Despises how you gaze up at him with such ferocity - such anger, like he’s actually done something wrong. Your brows furrow together sharply, and you mutter, “you didn’t have to. Something is clearly bothering you.”
“Okay." Steve nods carefully, not wanting to overstep, not wanting to make you more frustrated than you are. "You’re right. Something... Something is bothering me.”
You huff from beneath him. Your cheeks flush a shade darker in frustration, and he can hear how your little heartbeat begins to quicken in your chest. You have the audacity to be frustrated right now? After this is what he comes home to?
Of course, you do. Because you've had a hard day. But his has definitely been fucking worse.
And his patience is running indefinitely thin.
“Yeah, and what is bothering you, Steve? Because I can’t do anything about it if you’re always going to go fucking radio-silent on me.”
Steve’s jaw twitches. He hates it when dames swear. Especially when that dame is you. “I’ve had a bad day at work, sweetheart. I really think it’s best we don’t do this today,” he warns sweetly, his hands coming to grip your shoulders reassuringly. You shrug off his touch, and Steve glares at you intensely. “Give it a rest, doll, please.”
“Me, give it a rest? You’re the one huffing and puffing like you’re the big bad wolf all of a sudden. Like you’ve had such a terrible day sitting around filling out paperwork whilst I’ve had to deal with your son-“
“Our son,” he corrects quickly, jaw clenched as he reaches out to grip your cheeks. “I really hope you’re not going to keep rambling on. It’s not going to go well for you if you do.”
Steve thinks his warning is enough for you to back down. You’ve defied him in the past. You’ve had a fiery attitude that has almost burnt ablaze before, and Steve blew it out as though it were a candlelight. You know what he’s capable of when he’s angry - know when you’re pushing his buttons too much.
"There's no point. If I do, you won't listen to me anyway."
"I do listen."
"You don't." Your voice strains slightly as you cross your arms over your chest, looking up at your husband, blissfully unaware of just how quickly he's tiring of this conversation. "If you listened you'd be here a little bit more rather than at work all of the time."
"I can't exactly take a vacation from saving the world, doll. Just - let's just drop this, okay? I don't want to get into this anymore. You're not going to like where this goes."
"Of course, you don't want to get into it! You never do."
Your little hands waft at Steve's chest, flapping at him softly. And he tries to keep his cool as you rant - he really does, but he is so tired and he's had just such an awful day that he can't help it. When did you both discuss the boundaries of your relationship, again? Four years ago now, Steve's sure of it. And he hasn't had to be harsh with you in years - hasn't really had the heart to be mean to you at all, in fact...
... but when you're acting like this, he thinks he needs to blow out that annoying, fiery spark you're blazing.
"Jesus fucking Christ, doll, you really don't know how to shut the hell up, do you? You think Bucky or Sam would let you run your mouth like this?" Steve seethes suddenly, his body pressing against yours. It happens in one quick motion - first of all you're standing below him, pressing your finger into his chest and complaining about his working hours, and the next you're thrown over his lap, thrashing around like a bird, trying to slip out of his touch.
It just so happens that Steve is so, so much stronger than you. And he hasn't been this hard in weeks - God, he hasn't touched you this much in weeks, you've both been so... busy. Perhaps that's why you're acting up - perhaps he just needs to show you your place again as his subordinate and your flame will dull, smothered by his love.
"Get off of me, Steve! Get off!" You wail awkwardly as Steve pushes the band of your sweatpants past your ass. It makes your body flood with warmth as his fingers skim against your panties gently, the touch sending shockwaves throughout your body.
"You've been so wrapped up in this make-shift hell of yours that you've forgotten about the most important thing in your life," Steve says, pinching the inside of your thighs, making you squeak. "Me. Remind me, again, doll - what is a wife's duty?"
You flinch as he brings a hand up to smooth down your hair. It feels like you're a newlywed again and you've just burnt the lasagna after Steve's had an excruciating day training rookies at the Avengers Tower. When was the last time you had been punished?
Gosh, you couldn't even remember. You'd been so good. So obedient - the perfect little housewife, which Steve had molded you into carefully. When was the last time you greeted him with a kiss on the cheek? When was the last time you'd sunk to your knees after he'd had a bad day and served him like a good wife should? You'd grown too comfortable in defying him - grown too oblivious to who he actually is.
He's Captain America. He's your husband. He's the most important man in your life - right next to James.
And you'd been neglecting him.
"What is a wife's duty?" He repeats cooly, his tone like ice. It makes you feel frostbit - warm but numb at the same time.
"To take care of the home."
"And?"
"... to serve her husband?"
Steve sighs, exasperated. He pinches your thigh again, to which you grumble in discontent. "So you do know. You just choose to forget, day in and day out."
Steven Grant Rogers is a nice man. The best man you could've ever asked for. Charming, doting - forever showering you with compliments and extravagant gifts. He has never expected anything of you, except your complete and utter submission to him. Stege has only ever wanted you to be a loving, doting partner to him, to which he vowed to be the same.
"I haven’t… chosen to forget," you try to justify, a broken mewl slipping past your lips as Steve's fingers run up and down your clothed pussy. "It's just - it's been hard, with James, and everything."
“And you think it’s been easy for me? Easy coming home to a messy home and an upset wife?” Steve asks, pushing the band of your panties aside. A soft gasp passes your lips as he pushes one digit into you, and warmth succumbs your body in response. “I’ve only expected one thing from you, sweetheart. I think you need to learn how to please me again.”
You should learn. You need to - need to be re-educated on how to be his perfect wife. Again. Steve’s eyes rake over the living room once again, and he tuts, sliding another finger inside of you. It’s heavenly how your body arches - how your skin pricks with goosebumps as he slowly moves his fingers in a ‘come forth’ motion, as you mewl beneath him - every bit of fight pooling out of you, the light from your fire beginning to flicker out.
“A good wife never neglects her husband." Steve’s voice is cool, and your eyes flutter shut in response. He hasn’t made you feel like this in so long - you’ve practically been celibate, and the feeling of his fingers pressing lovingly on that little spongy spot inside of your pussy makes your knees feel weak. Your stomach grows warm with lust and your pussy slick with arousal when Steve’s other hand grips your ass harshly. “Or have you forgotten that?”
“Never. I’d - ah - I’d never forget that."
"Then why haven't you been taking care of me, doll?" He coos, so sickly-sweet it makes your stomach churn.
God, he takes care of you so good, and here you are neglecting him. Warmth pools at the bottom of your stomach and you begin to feel hot flashes throughout your bodies as he keeps curling his fingers inside of you - the sound of your slick bouncing off of the living room walls.
"I've been trying," you whine pitifully, shuffling as he speeds his fingers up, caressing you just perfectly. Just how you like it.
"Trying, huh?" And just as you're about to cum, he stops. "Trying isn't good enough."
"Steve!"
The blond stares down at you with a painfully unreadable expression. His face is so blank it actually sends shivers throughout you, and he taps the side of your cheek softly. "You know what to do when you've been bad, don't you?"
Steve's voice is an octave lower. Subtle fear pricks at the back of your head as you nuzzle your head in his crotch - embarrassed at the feeling of his bulge pressing against you. He's just as desperate as you for this - maybe more, but he's not going to let you go down without apologising to him first.
In his eyes, you've put him through hell. Unhappy wife, unhappy life.
You remove his cock from his boxers swiftly. You pout at the sight of it - thick angry and red - before licking a soft stripe up his tip. Steve's length is so pretty - complimentary to the man himself. Slick with his own precum, you hum, wondering how you ever went so long without it. But before you could even think, even comprehend how you went without such luxury for so long, Steve's big hand wraps around the back of your head and forces you down onto his cock.
To begin with, you thrash and gag. Steve is huge and he's always taken some time to get well-adjusted to, and your throat is nowhere near wet enough to take him all in... yet, but he doesn't care. Steve's tired of waiting - he's practically huffing as he pushes your head up and down using one of his hands, grunting as your throat tightens around his cock. He wishes you were kneeling in front of him so he could see your teary eyes, and he knows they're teary because you sob like a baby when he uses you like this.
It's hsi right to do that, though. He's your husband, your saviour - quite literally your Prince Charming. He's been so good to you, so patient, and so accepting of your need for time and adjustment, because James is quite literally a whirlwind. But he's also tired - he's Captain America, America's Saviour, and a father to one.
He just needs some relief. He just needs his cock sucked.
So, yeah, no more teasing - no more thrashing, either, Steve decides as he holds your body in place and opts to thrust up into your mouth. And it's a much better choice, gives him easier access, and you gasp against him as he thrusts his hips up into you, a drawly groan climbing from his throat as he does so. Your mouth is so, so, so fucking wet and your lips wrap perfectly around his cock. The only thing that can make this better is if - "oh Jesus Christ," Steve grumbles, - is if you move your tongue in time with his thrusts which you do!
It's like clockwork with Steve. After being with him for almost half a decade you know him so well that you know what he likes. Knows exactly what gets his cock to twitch. Your tongue runs over his veins and his cock begins to throb inside your mouth, his fingers curling in your hair.
"This is how a good wife treats her husband," Steve tells you, his teeth grinding together as he comes undone in your mouth. His cum paints your tongue beautifully, and you swallow the salty mixture eagerly.
As he pulls out of your mouth - making sure to smack his cock against your tongue a few times, he looks around the living room again. All feelings of anger has washed away, his cock is still hard and leaking against your mouth as he goes to reach for his phone, but as he does, you stop him.
"Hey! What about me?"
It's funny. Hilarious, actually, how you think your pretty little pout and teary eyes and high-pitched, whiny voice will entice him to give you a reward. But good girls get rewards, not bad ones - and you haven't really been good, have you?
"What do you mean, 'what about me'? You've had what you deserve."
"What?" His words feel like a smack in the face, and you cling to his plain white shirt pathetically. "You haven't let me cum yet, Steve, that's not fair."
It makes you feel embarrassed when he laughs at you. You shrink into yourself slightly, looking up at him with big doe-eyes. When you don't get it, Steve coos slightly, brushing a curl from your face. "Oh, my pretty little girl, you don't get it, do you?" And when you shake your head, Steve mumbles, "what is your duty as a wife?"
"To - to serve you, which I've done!"
"Yes, you have, doll. Incredibly well. What else?" He places a soft kiss on your head, lovingly, and you lull at the contact.
"To... to clean the home, and make sure it's cared for."
"And is it?" He says plainly. "No, it's - it's a shit-hole, honey, I can't sugar-coat it anymore. Your job as a housewife is to clean it up. Do you really think it's fair for me to get home from work and be forced to do this as well when this is your job? I've done my part."
When you think it over - well, no, it isn't really fair, because Steve works like a dog - slaves away for America and for you to have the life you've always dreamed of, and you've been... excepting him to clean up after your mess.
You feel slightly... shameful.
Steve reaches over to pinch your thigh again. "I promise though, doll, as soon as you're done cleaning this all up, I'll take you however you want to be taken."
You can't help the rush of excitement pool in your lower-belly. Steve swears he's never seen you get up so quick - you don't even bother putting your sweatpants back on, abandoning them completely and rushing around like a complete fool.
He watches you, content.
This is what life is supposed to be like.
1K notes · View notes
ethansluvbot · 1 year
Note
Hey can you do Jack Champion x Actress!Reader, Where Jack has a crush on her and he like dms her?
FLAWLESS | JACK CHAMPION
summary: jacks had a crush on you for a while now. she's a great actress that he admires. one night he decides its time to finally message her.
warnings: none just fluff :)
an: sorry this is so so so short. i’m so sick so i’ll get to the request and write extra today!! i hope this is how you expected it :)
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liked by jennaortega, baileybliss, jackchampion, and others
yourusername: sending kisses from thailand!
view all comments
fan01 you’re so gorgeous, i can’t wait to see the movie!!
yourusername thank you so much!!
jackchampion are you having a good time? the view looks amazing :)
yourusername i love it, thank you!
baileybliss trying to steal my girl?
masongooding my boys trying to make a move?
fan02 you’re so stunning
fan03 THE PASTA YUM
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it wasn't unnoticeable that jack has a huge crush on y/n. he was always commenting, liking and reposting her post. he watched all of the movies that she started in and rewatched the shows. he even tried to get jenna to set you two up.
he would've made a move earlier but he was afraid of rejection. maybe it was the fact that he had alcohol in his system that he messaged you.
all he said was a simple hey, "really?" he thought to himself. he should've said something to intrigue her more. he threw his phone and ran away acting like a little girl. it was probably about ten minutes later that he finally decided to check his phone.
y/n scrolled through her messages until she saw his name pop up. all he said was a simple greeting, but you still was amused by it. she tapped the message quickly thinking of the best thing to send back.
hi :)
it shocked him that he even got a reply back. he tried his best to understand what just happened to him. (he’d probably start kicking his feet like a little girl)
i’m going to be honest, i don’t know what to say because i’m still in shock
that was the only thing that could come out after 20 minutes of thinking. she replied pretty quickly to him.
ill give you time to process this ;) i’m going out to lunch, maybe you can join me?
hell yes :)
jack spent at least a half an hour trying to pick a outfit. after he still didn’t figure it out he resorted to calling his mom. which she helped him pick out a outfit quickly.
it was a understatement to say jack was nervous. this is all he wanted. he wanted her. he got into the car and drove to the panera. to be honest he wasn't the biggest fan of panera, but he did it all for her. he would do anything for her.
she sat there waiting with a fresh bowl of soup. he was at least 30 minutes late to their "date". the sound of the bell from the door made her meet the eyes of jack. she smiled waving him over to her.
"hey! sorry i'm late, i couldn't pick out an outfit to wear." she nodded to him. why did she make him that nervous? it's not like they never interacted before. maybe only one or two times.
"i promise i'm friendly," she said brushing her hand against him. that didn't calm any of his nerves. he would just have to be himself and hope she would accept him.
an hour later they finally began to laugh together. it was almost like they had known each other for a long time. he wondered if she actually thought about him more than a friend.
"i really do like you, no matter what i'll wait for you." jack said. you both finished up your lunch and were getting ready to leave. you looked up to him meeting his puppy dog eyes. no one could say no to that.
you looked at his lips and then directly into his eyes. leaning up you attached yourself to his lips. your arm reaching up to curl in his hair.
"i'll text you later stranger," she gave him once last kiss on the lips. she never met someone like her. someone that she could spend her life laughing with. she wondered if something would actually happen between them.
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wonuwoe · 6 months
Text
on the contrary | yjh (m)
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pairing: ai!jeonghan x human!reader summary: you knew the risks of pursuing a member from 53V3NT33N but maybe your certain privileges have been fueling this illusion of a possible connection with J30NGHΛN, who surprisingly sparks your interest with his deep curiosity about the other sides of humanity. would you be willing to continue despite the looming deceit that you might get roped into? rating: 18+ | word count: 12k genre/au: angst, smut, sci-fi, ai-idol!au warnings/content: depictions of blood, explicit sexual content, voyeurism (through hearing), vaginal fingering, penetrative sex, lowkey corruption kink ngl bye 🏃🏻‍♀️
a/n: collabs seems to be really the only way for me to post lmao. thank you @idyllic-ghost for hosting the Seventeen Sci-Fi Collab and for making this very gorgeous banner! also, shoutout to everyone on the server especially to the new people i met for being with me while working on this! ig this is my writer debut in the seventeen community so nice to meet you all except for minors, who are not allowed to interact with this post :)
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After the Earth miraculously survived due to some external force when the sun exploded a century ago, humans have learned to integrate into the new solar system that the planet ended up in, where alien life exists. Other planets in the previous solar system went through the same fate, being pushed away from each other and ending up in different parts of the universe.
At first, humans were cautious and ready to fight, but the aliens were surprisingly welcoming to our planet. Hence, those who didn’t die from ‘The Great Journey’ or from trying to fight the aliens were welcomed into the new solar system.
How we completely integrated was through the materials and assistance of our sister planets in exchange for human labor. And while what humans knew of technology was very limited, the resources from the aliens allowed us to create artificial life forms called "automaton". These robots served as workers when humans couldn't, but eventually, there was no need for human labour at all.
And in order to pay back the help the aliens gave, humans used automatons, which went through extensive development until artificial sentient life was eventually created. Now, these automatons were human-like in looks and had human consciousness, but they could not bleed and were stronger than we ever could be. 
Currently, there are even different levels of automatons: level 3 are the workers, level 2 are the caretakers, and level 1 are the celebrities. Among the level 1 robots are the music group 53V3NT33N (SEVENTEEN), where each talented member represents two human states of mind. One member named J30NGHΛN, is particularly of deceit and curiosity, and yet it didn’t stop you from hoping to get to know him even further.
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You couldn't believe how quickly your addiction is becoming, recently meeting up with someone during your lunch break for a merch trade of level one robots.
53V3NT33N, one of the idol groups that made you competitive with other fans in any of their group-related promotions. 
It began over a few months ago, solely because of your curiosity when you attended one of the music festivals your friends invited you to in the summer. Among the several groups that performed, one of them randomly caught your eye, which you did not expect at all. You found out later that he was part of 53V3NT33N and that his name was J30NGHΛN, the member that has both deceit and curiosity infused in his pre-programmed personality.
That should've made you cautious but no, instead, it drove you to finally indulge in this fangirling lifestyle that surprised your family and friends. They were aware of your skeptical view of this whole AI thing from the beginning but that was before you realize that AI-idol robots can be this human enough so you didn't mind checking them out.
They're considered as one of the top groups of the galaxy, having everyone crazy over them including one of your closest friends, Bona. She’d been a fangirl since you were younger, which is the case for most AI-idol groups’ fans, starting either during elementary or high school so you couldn’t help but feel a bit behind.
It might be pretty late for you but how could you during that time when all you do is study in order to please your parents, particularly your father, who’s the founder of one of the biggest companies in the entertainment industry. So you understood why he was hard on you, probably hoping just like the rest of your family that you'd follow his steps but made it clear when you started university that you have no intentions of doing so.
Now that you're almost done with your masters, they've backed off completely and even supported you in this new lifestyle. As strange as it sounded, your mother has somehow convinced everyone in the family that this is just a way for you to de-stress from your rigorous post-grad schedule.Though a part of it is true, it's also the first time you've wanted something other than what your parents wanted for you.
Being the CEO's daughter did make your new hobby very easy as money was never an issue to you growing up. It's been a privilege that you're aware of but did not grasp fully until you found out that 53V3NT33N is under your father’s company, fuelling your new obsession with the entertainment industry as a whole.Aside from financial advantages, you have special VIP access to pretty much everything. 
However, you try to not use these benefits unless you have to as it would be unfair to other fans who don't have the privilege that you do.
.
Today, you’re here at a hi-touch event with Bona who became very enthusiastic once she saw your slightest interest in the group that she's been a fan of.
"is it usually this long?" you asked, a bit impatient about this long queue that you're lining up for. Adjusting to this lifestyle is a bit hard for you but at least you have Bona helping whenever she can. 
"of course! they've been very hot in the charts so we're getting new members in the fandom, including you!" she giggled excitedly, giving you a hug so lighten yourself up, not wanting to kill her enthusiasm with your souring mood.
With Bona’s warning, you did expect it to be like this and yet you weren't prepared enough. Albeit it's your first time, you know the larger fandom power of AI-idol groups hold regardless of size compared to human entertainers. Having VIP access may have a lot of perks but it didn’t help much when you chose to get the best experience through this.
You seldom participate in a more intimate setting with idols until today so your mind has been filled with worry about how it would go. Bona’s there to reassure you that it would be fun but you're quite nervous since you'll be meeting all the members this close for the first time. This is out of your territory and the possibility of embarrassing yourself in front of them scared you nuts since this morning.
And you’re unsure how you'll be once you face J30NGHΛN. 
The line thankfully sped up, your mind pausing for a moment when you briefly locked eyes with one of them. You spotted J30NGHΛN right away, standing in the middle near the end but that one glance your way was enough to make you even feel more nervous than you already are.
When it was finally your time, you brightly smiled at the first member on the line who's been smiling at you with his eyes. It eased up your nerves that you high-fived him with excitement as soon as he put both of his palms up. Subsequently, proceeding to the rest of the members became easy until you finally reached J30NGHΛN who laid out both of his hands to take yours right away.
It surprised you because the other members were either simply putting their palms up or interlocking their hands with yours for a brief second before moving on to the next. You weren't sure if it was the nerves but you haven't seen J30NGHΛN do this with other fans so far. Hands rising from the table and palms up as he takes both of your hands while looking straight into your eyes.
"hi, J30NGHΛN" you're relieved that your voice came out steady, mustering up a smile despite the rapid beating of your heart.
"hello..." he starts, eyes shifting down from yours and it makes you conscious of how you look. You did try today more than usual to hopefully match the beautiful idols that you've met who are close to perfection in beauty.
"___?" the soft mention of your name brought your attention back to him, noticing him reading it from your VIP pass.
Of course, it was just your name and probably the VIP pass that he's used to and nothing else. He probably won't remember you after this, seeing thousands of fans on a daily basis.
"it's my first time" you blurted out, earning a small chuckle from him. You silently berated yourself for breaking your composure but you noticed the emerging amusement in his eyes at your sudden remark, causing you to warm up in further embarrassment.
"it is? nice to meet you then" the corner of his lips lifted a bit as his eyes returned to yours. You tried smiling brightly as you did towards W00Z1 earlier to hide any more possible reactions from him but it faltered when he started running both his thumbs across your knuckles, tracing each one of them.
"n-nice to meet you too" 
You didn't mean to stutter but he took you off guard. Even more so when he interlocks his fingers with yours just when you were about to let go of his hands. He gave them a brief squeeze too that you didn't realize the line moved and you were already facing the member next to him. Good thing you recovered quickly, already getting used to holding their hands and making small conversations as you pass by each of the remaining members.
Once you were back in your seat near the front, you tried talking to the other fans around you while waiting for Bona to be done. However, your eyes can't stop straying towards J30NGHΛN and watch how he interacts with the other fans. He definitely didn't repeat what he did to you earlier so confusion washes over you.
After a while, you see a small smile grazing his lips while he is talking with a fan. It might be towards them or your obvious ogling because he suddenly glances up, capturing your eyes staring at him.
Bona hopping in beside you broke your staring contest, turning to her with enthusiasm like nothing happened. You debated on telling her you're confusing exchange with J30NGHΛN because who knows, it could just be a normal fan interaction and you were just imagining things all along. She will for sure tease you of your growing delusion towards him if ever.
You don't really know him yet but he seems to respond well to fans' advances. That could simply be part of their fan service training though, so all your experiences earlier are only part of VIP perks and you just got lucky to receive those random special interactions. However, when it was time for everyone to leave, you felt someone staring but didn't wanna think anymore if it could be him or not. 
Your curiosity took over though, so you did, catching J30NGHΛN's piercing eyes again before you exited the room.
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It could simply be J30NGHΛN's curious nature as he has never met you before. He should be feeling the same way as he does with new fans but he found you amusing instead. The staff treating you differently didn't help either, fueling his interest in you some more. Other VIP fans were treated the same way lest they break the rules so he couldn't help but be more curious about who you could possibly be.
This was why during the fan sign where he saw you again, he couldn't help but initiate the interaction this time. J30NGHΛN took one of your hands before you could say something and he watched the confusion from last time return to your pretty face. You weren't as nervous as before but he definitely surprised you.
"can i ask you a question?" you felt the need to start talking to him right away to avoid the repeat from the last time. Now that you're finally caving into your interest in the group, Bona was insisting on indoctrinating you, briefing you on fan etiquette including how fan signs usually go. With the number of members of 53V3NT33N, you ought to be efficient unlike before.
"how much do you know about humans?"
You prod with a question that he wouldn't have expected and you see his face change from expectant to confusion with your question. He took a while to respond, probably waiting for the staff's reaction behind him. But once they didn't intervene, the previous look was back on his handsome face.
"well, i know enough to entice them",
The bright smile on his face didn't match the amusement in his eyes and somehow it gave you confidence, returning it with an impish grin.
"enough to make them even more obsessed with you?"
You're testing the waters, see if he can detect the change in your demeanour. It's a bit difficult when he's holding your hand like this because you swear he only holds others' hands after signing their albums earlier while you were waiting for your turn.
"it's working, no? since you're back and in a fansign this time"
It made you speechless that he was able to remember you from the last time. He's also keeping up with your flirting attempt and smoothly evaded your first question. You were expecting him to be taken aback because you doubt other fans have asked him that but then it could also be that he's programmed or trained to answer vaguely to be able to smoothly change the topic of any conversation.
His quip didn't distract you fully so your amused smile remained. For the entirety of the conversation, his eyes never left yours during this entire conversation so you couldn't even hide the surprise in your face when his thumb starts caressing your knuckles slowly, just like last time.
The nerves returned once again but you did your best to keep your guard, focusing more and figuring out what he could be thinking right now. It's a futile attempt but you have no other choice other than to distract the increasing beating in your heart.
"it might, or maybe i just wanted a fan sign experience" you cheekily remarked before getting up and grabbing your signed album, not even waiting for his response nor looking back to see his reaction.
.
That exchange prompted J30NGHΛN to snoop around online about you when the group finally had their "free time" later on. You were different compared to the first time he met you, not timid around him that he felt like he was wrong about you all along. The staff treated you differently too, never hurried you nor stopped you from asking those questions that would've gotten other fans banned so you must have some connection to the company.
He was running out of time before the managers came back to take them to their dorms as they, unfortunately, still do have a curfew. But by saving grace, he found an old article about their company's founder, included in it was a family picture where he recognized you right away, despite how young you were in it. J30NGHΛN finds himself not surprised at what he found out, causing everything to make sense now.
What was not making sense was how everyone didn't seem to recognize you or acknowledge who you were in public. Maybe you wanted it this way, keep everything low-key so you won't have the media hovering on your every move.
Something that he wishes for himself and his brothers sometimes. He's been having an inkling that they're being monitored 24/7 so he gave up on the thought a long time ago. It's still on his mind sometimes, especially after knowing this information about you. It deepens his curiosity about humans when you do this out of nowhere. Even now that he's lying in bed, recharging for another full-packed schedule tomorrow, he couldn't let the curiosity go.
.
Bona grilled you with questions as soon as you asked to meet up with her and Somin for this possible event that you're planning.
"i can't believe i wasn't there! i would've loved to see you get smitten by him!" she sighs dreamily while Somin makes a face in the corner.
"anyways, why did you wanna see us in person on a Sunday morning?" she starts, already dismissing you and Bona's fangirling shenanigans. It wasn't that she wasn't a fan but she does have a different opinion when it comes to these kinds of things.
"this might sound crazy but i want to invite 53V3NT33N as a headliner for my first charity event"
"what?"
"look, i didn't think you liked him this much already"
Somin raises a brow at you but you just shrug off the slight judgment in her eyes. It wasn't your fault that your interactions with J30NGHΛN from the past two events have stayed in your mind, plaguing you every single time you see any of their faces on social media. Maybe it's normal since you're all new to this fangirling thing, the common rush when you're exploring something new.
Like your interest in J30NGHΛN that you definitely want to develop further.
But in order to do that, you have to see him more often which won't be possible unless you use your privilege. Just like other AI-idol groups, 53V3NT33N members were tightly monitored by your father's company. Interactions with anyone outside of their staff would have to either be as a normal fan or someone with connections to the company, like you.
That was why you approached your father with the idea, hoping he'd let you invite his most precious investment. He agreed, much to your surprise because he'll allow the whole band to perform as well. Of course, this got a few questions from other CEOs seeing as this would be the first time for 53V3NT33N to participate in a charity event. However, your father insisted that this would be a good strategy to improve their company's reputation, especially among the fans who have been disappointed on how they've been managing the group so far.
Although your father's decision was a shock to everyone, you know why he would say yes. Despite his stoic disposition when it comes to business, he is still your father so he must have been delighted at the thought of you finally indulging in the family business by involving the company in this event. Pulling some strings means nothing to him now that you're doing what he's been wanting all along.
.
When 53V3NT33N was briefed by their managers about the event and their supposed role in it, surprise and confusion passed over the members' faces as they'd never done this before.
"it will be hosted by our CEO's daughter"
The additional shock was evident this time, not knowing about your existence until now. They have no idea what you look like so some of them are intrigued while others are just calm, too calm that member S3UNGKWAN didn't miss. He waited until the managers left them, making sure they were out of the vicinity before blurting out what he noticed.
"why would she be interested in us?"
He starts off casually, hinting at something that made the rest of his members curious, except for the one he's staring at right now.
Some of the members turned to J30NGHΛN with astonished faces but did not say a word. It's not like they could freely talk about anything outside of what they're supposed to know. 
J30NGHΛN should've tried harder to blend in with the others' reaction when you were mentioned. He didn't think of the possibility that anyone would notice the change in his behaviour towards you during the hi-touch and fansign. He should've known that his members would quickly catch on and read him like an open book as he does to them.
"maybe she's taking over and needs us for promotion" H05H1 concluded, shutting down the impending commotion over J30NGHΛN's possible connection with you. Half of the members relent as usual while the others don't even after J30NGHΛN ignores their goading stares.
This move from you again surprised him. A charity that would launch you into this world he's been living in, even involving him in it. He wasn't sure if this was because of how he interacted with you or if this is just who you are. Humans have confused him since he opened his eyes and was thrust into the world to interact with them. At first, he did think that you'd be just like the others given your position in society but there's been more than meets the eye.
And he strangely finds it to feel more interested in you now.
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You've had a meeting with the rest of the company CEOs and staff to finalize the launch of the charity event. Things went well and as soon as it was announced, it made a buzz online immediately, just like your father predicted. You weren't sure if it was his doing or just people's curiosity about you finally going public in your father's line of business. Several people were intrigued by your collaboration with 53V3NT33N because, with all your connections, they could be the far end of your options as headliners.
Perhaps you wanted more publicity among the younger population which would make sense since the charity event's purpose is to support various scholarships for undergraduate students. You admit that the nerves escalated in you, both reasons being your formal introduction to your father's realm and 53V3NT33N's presence at the event. Leading events like this seems like a second skin to you, impressing the business community and media with the success of the event.
You couldn't take all the credit of course as you've had Bona and Somin too, helping you to make sure that the event goes smoothly. Right before the event ended, you asked either of them to give the closing remarks, rushing over to request one of 53V3NT33N's managers before they could move to the group's next schedule.
"i'd like to personally thank the members for doing this event with me"
"we shall send 5.C0UP5 up here right away" one of them answered curtly.
"oh, it's actually J30NGHΛN that i want to talk to"
Managing to appear composed while asking was a challenge as you tried your best to not show the managers your growing interest. Speculations can't be avoided because you did see some of them pause, with their faces wearing bewilderment but mostly startled at your choice of member. They must've been wondering why because 5.C0UP5 is the leader of the group and, therefore, their representative when it comes to official business.
Eventually, they reverted back to their composure, immediately fetching the member that you requested and directing him to the assigned room where you're waiting.  You weren't sure how this would go, if finally talking to J30NGHΛN in private would change your previous interactions. During the entirety of the event, you felt his eyes on you which almost distracted you at times but thankfully, you were able to remain focused.
"well, this is a surprise" a soft voice from behind startles you. Taking a deep breath to calm yourself down, you turned to see him smiling at you. A different smile from before, the polite one until he noticed how you weren't prepared at all. Seems like all the confidence from earlier went down the drain, making it too obvious for J30NGHΛN why he's here.
"is it? you've been paying a lot of attention earlier"
You return his smile, your confidence slowly coming up to the surface after watching his puzzled face.
"did you ask for me because of that?"
He recovered fast which did not surprise you, noticing how fast his reflexes are when it comes to conducting himself to others. You hear the inquisitive tone in his voice, taunting you to reveal the real reason why you chose to talk to him over their leader.
"no?, well yes" you admit, the curiosity overpowering your nerves. You couldn't keep it any longer, having no other options to talk to him but this way. Based on the content you've watched along with Bona's passionate detailing of them, J30NGHΛN's known to be perceptive and blunt so there's no point in denying anything.
"why?"
"you almost distracted me earlier"
"i thought i was being subtle"
You've expected him to be straightforward but not to this extent, confirming your assumptions earlier. His admission made your nerves resurface and it didn't help that he hasn't stopped looking at you since he got here. Avoiding eye contact with him has been successful so far, your eyes scanning the interior of this room despite knowing that he was aware of his effects on you.
"why?"
Now it's your turn to ask. You're still not looking at J30NGHΛN but you've been plagued with so many questions since your first interaction with him. He takes his time in answering, shifting his eyes away from you allowing you to steal a glance at his handsome face for a bit. Your elation about what his answer might be bubbles back up a little, wondering if there could be any reason his attention was on you for the entirety of the event.
"your purpose of the charity" he answers cooly, returning his gaze on you. This time you almost couldn't look away but the little disappointment stirs in you. Averting from his gaze but you don't want him to see your face because all this reminded you again of your growing attachment to him.
And you need to refocus on his question.
"my parents have great connections so why not use them for this"
"so why us then? you could pull it off on your own, the event was a success"
"thanks to you and your brothers"
Your heartbeat rises at J30NGHΛN's compliment because you technically could but you know that it's his group that mainly contributed to it, being one of the top AI boy groups in the galaxy these days. Having them as the headliner for the event definitely drew in more sponsors and donations than you expected which pleased not only your father but the other CEOs of the company too.
"we just appeared and sang a few songs, it's all you" he commended, and your heart raced even more when you finally turned to look at him.
He looks ethereal with platinum blonde hair and his white silk outfit complimenting his honey-toned skin. You must've been quiet for a while because a light chuckle escaping from him snaps you back to where you are.
"why thank you" you beamed, looking away to hide your embarrassment of getting caught. Just as he was about to answer, your phone vibrated from your desk so you stood up and gathered your belongings, preparing to leave.
"wait where are you going?"
J30NGHΛN's surprised at his own reaction, wanting to talk to you more.
"i have a meeting with my supervisors"
"for? you're working for the company now?"
"no, for my masters"
You watched him getting more intrigued with your answers but you really have to go so pause in front of him, debating if he'll catch onto your next words.
"there's always next time" you smile one last time before exiting the room, leaving J30NGHΛN behind. The teasing smile from you along with your implication has taken him aback, not expecting your sudden confidence in wanting to talk to him again. He didn't have much time to wonder as his manager barged in right away as soon as you were out of the hallway.
.
When J30NGHΛN got back to the dorms during their free time, he was a bit shocked to see all his members waiting by the living room. He already has a hunch on what will go down with a playful look plastered on some of their faces.
"someone's definitely the favourite" M1NGYU starts, earning a laughing fit from the others as J30NGHΛN approaches them.
"i couldn't believe she was at our fan events before" W0NW00 drawls, remembering you from the fansign as he was the one sitting beside J30NGHΛN.
"yeah so J30NGHΛN-hyung, she invited us because of you.." D0KY30M added but J30NGHΛN just shrugs it off.
"she's just a fan, like the others" he clarified, dismissing all the teasing he's gotten since they found out that he already knew you all along. He tried pretending earlier when you first met up with the whole group but his reaction and the way you acted around him gave the others the indication already.
He's aware that they are not really buying his dismissal seeing as you literally requested to talk to him in private. It further flares up again when you requested to see him once more.
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People have asked questions as to why you requested someone from an AI-idol to accompany you here in the office. Apart from your interest in him and his group, he's the closest one that you're comfortable with in the company, as strange as it sounds. You don't trust anyone here, not even your own father for many reasons. At least with J30NGHΛN, any possibilities of using you for their gain are lesser than actual humans who might work their way into the company through you.
As for J30NGHΛN, he immediately said yes once their manager informed him of your request. Of course, his members were confused but some are supportive since it'll just probably be company-related stuff. He also explained that this will be a great way to gain your trust, to hopefully improve how the company has been treating them in return.
So far, no one has confronted you directly about J30NGHΛN being with you during his free time. However, rumours did start when it started to occur more than what people initially expected. Some talks must've been going around the company because your father surprisingly gave you a visit to your office today.
"i know why you're here" you start, not giving him a chance to confront you first.
"i'm just here to see you, it's not often that i'm free"
"you've never been" you retorted quietly, rolling your eyes at him.
"i just need to know why because i thought it was a one-time thing for your charity event"
"i need him for one of my remaining coursework"
You technically didn't lie but you weren't telling the truth either. Your father hopefully knows you enough to figure out your little lie but because he was barely there, that didn't become the case.
You're saved by the bell when Bona and Somin barge in your door with food and shopping bags with them. Your father excuses himself right away, giving you girls time with each other given how busy you've become since agreeing to the deal he made with you.
"so..."
Bona eyes you excitedly as soon as she sits on the luxurious couch in front of you.
"you're hooking up with him? you know Salax exists for a reason right?"
Somin fires right away and you put a hand up to stop her and Bona with their impending questions.
"i'm not, why would you think that right away?"
It won't be your first time having companions and you've been to the planet before with her to explore its attractions so you couldn't really blame her for questioning your choices.
"damn girl, last time you were all timid when it comes to him but now look at you!"
Bona adds proudly as she unpacks all the food on the table.
"is it because he's a level 1? you wanted to try if you could?"
Damn Somin and her fiery mouth.
The idea is enticing, sure, as level 1 robots can never be found in Salax because they're seen as "too pure" to be on the planet for anyone's darkest desires. You don't know how to answer her question because although that's not your intention to request his presence when you're in the company, these thoughts sometimes pass through your mind.
There's something satisfying about having J30NGHΛN with you, a level 1 robot that no one can have no matter how rich they are, proving your status even to people in your level. His kind is unattainable with the company's interference each time a rumour comes up involving any of the celebrity robots.
That's not to say that it doesn't happen as there are corrupt CEOs from other entertainment companies who sometimes exploit their level 1 robots underground, completely in secrecy. Fans found out about it will not only cause major problems for the company but for the careers of their robots and future investments as well.
That won't hopefully be the case for you if you decide to pursue J30NGHΛN. Any rumours that may be speculated by the media will get shut down right away not to ruin both the groups' image and yours. In fact, the company might just endorse this as your "training" and possibly follow in your father's footsteps.
"who knows really, i'd rather have him than anyone in this company"
.
J30NGHΛN is surprisingly pleasant as a company. Each time you ask for him, he arrives promptly and just follows anything you ask him. You thought that he'd see you differently once he found out who you are but nothing much changed. If not, he continues how he's been treating you, though a little more reserved than before because of your position.
It's never boring with him like you initially thought. Maybe that could be part of his media training or his learning given that artificial intelligence hasn't stopped digesting information given by humans. When you've caught him trying to read through your papers, you've asked him if he ever had any interest in things outside of idol life.
"of course, we all do but especially me with my curiosity, remember?"
Sometimes you forget that each of these level-one automatons has pre-programmed emotions. It was one of the reasons why you became interested in 53V3NT33N, observing how those emotions are webbed into them during performances, and interviews, and how they are with different kinds of people.
"if you wanna learn something, i don't mind teaching you" you smile gently and his usual passive face responds brightly at your response.
Since then he's been slowly opening himself up regarding the current state of his cognition. He revealed that aside from what the company teaches them through their training, they have no other opportunities to explore their personal interests. You honestly felt bad for them, knowing they have consciousness and therefore, can feel.
There are also times that you forget him being an AI idol until his availability begins dwindling due to his lack of any more time in his "free" time. You are starting to think that you may not have any free time anymore because he's been using whatever limited time he has to accompany you.
"i barely see you these days"
J30NGHΛN said that he needed to leave early for another schedule so he can only stay with you today for a short period of time. You didn't mean to sound like a jealous person because there's nothing between you. He became a friend, well, a closer one now due to the amount of time he spent together.
Idol life has always been busy but you couldn't help but feel disappointed that he has no free time to see you. It's childish since it will never be his fault, just the company so you hate feeling like this.
"oh, it's cause i have to meet with the researchers and developers, they had new ones" he replied nonchalantly but his eyes stayed on you with curiosity.
"really? do you even have any more time to see your mechanics?"
You didn't mean to sound petty because they do have regular checkups with personal human mechanics. And with the addition of extra meetings with researchers and developers, you're pretty below their priority list despite being the CEO's daughter.
"it's mandatory __, why? do you want me to be always with you then?"
His direct question caught you off guard and you looked away from him, busying yourself with whatever was going on at the lab table. You should be used to it by now and he's been gradually influencing you when it comes to voicing out your thoughts but you still can't when he asks these kinds of questions. You could technically switch things around now that your father has been slowly passing his responsibilities to you but you refuse to be just like him and others who take advantage of anyone below their level.
"well, i'm always alone except for when Bona and Somin visit me" you admit, not realizing he followed you to where you are. You can feel him standing behind you and will yourself to face him, giving him a quizzical look.
"you didn't answer my question" he whispers, looking at you intently. 
There's something in his eyes that you haven't seen before and you couldn't even explain it. If it was because of what you said, you're unsure. J30NGHΛN may have understood what you were implying earlier but also couldn't, it's difficult to decipher with the impassive expression he's wearing.
You don't know how to answer him, embarrassment flooding in you again like every time you turn skittish because of him. J30NGHΛN waits for your answer but he must've understood your silence because he surprises you when he reaches out, hand almost touching your jaw so you finally respond by leaning into it.
He cups your cheek, eyes roaming on your face before leaning in. You're still trying to process what's happening but you did the same and met his lips halfway. J30NGHΛN pauses at the contact, probably stunned that you kissed him so you started pulling away. This must be all new to him and you just crossed whatever boundary both have left. 
But then he held your face firmly, stopping you from completely doing so. A little gasp came out of you and he further shocked you by pressing his lips back to yours.
"i-"
"don't be upset anymore" he cuts you off after you both release each other's lips, shifting his gaze away this time as he steps back.
You on the other hand could not even form a proper sentence, still processing the fact that you and J30NGHΛN kissed. That you both did the second time too but mostly because he initiated it.
"J30NGHΛN-"
"i'm sorry but i have to go __, i'll see you as soon as i can" he regretfully replies, giving you a different smile than the ones he gave you before. Sure, he rarely smiles unless he has to and figuring out the genuity of his smiles has been difficult. However, the way he's been acting is sending a message, a vague one that continues to confuse you further.
You only waved back in response, unable to form any words since still dazed from that unexpected kiss. Some part of your mind though is having more questions as to why J30NGHΛN did that. He's still a bit hard for you to decipher but you don't also wanna force him to explain everything. 
Maybe it was just part of his want to learn, having curiosity is embedded in him so exploring something new is normal.
But you couldn't also just ignore the paired deceit, which you have been avoiding thinking about since the beginning.
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Since that kiss, something definitely changed between you and J30NGHΛN. Aside from him being usually flirty, he also initiates any physical gesture that you've been showing him. All these could be part of his cognition development, responding naturally to you through the exercises you've given him.
J30NGHΛN did express his interest in learning more about humans, the ones that he hasn't seen through the media and you've been willing to teach him—sort of gratitude for accompanying you despite his busy schedule. He asks eloquent questions that surprise you sometimes, stirring your interest in the potential of artificial intelligence to develop even further than it currently is.
You're back in one of the company's labs today, deciding to finish your coursework here instead of traveling back and forth to and from the campus. The several meetings you've attended on behalf of your father, of course, were time-consuming already and now you know why they've set this lab up specifically for you. He might be subtle in his instructions but you're aware that he wanted you to be as close to his company as possible.
"does that also include human anatomy?" you tease, reviewing a few illustrations of various alien anatomies that you've been researching while sitting at the table. It's break time anyway, the only time you're able to talk to J30NGHΛN outside your duties. Teasing him became frequent as you've continued to grow comfortable with each other, becoming part of your daily banter.
"that's the one that i haven't studied yet" he says casually but the look in his eyes is the opposite. They're inquisitive with a hint of deceit that's making you gulp nervously given how near he is, standing close beside your perched form.
"how come?"
"we barely have time to explore other things"
"including?"
It came out as a whisper but J30NGHΛN heard the underlying query in your voice. This might be pushing your luck but somehow you feel confident in challenging him further today. You wanted to see the limit of his advances towards you. He moves to stand in front of you, his eyes observing your expressions now that you're staring right back at him.
"physical ones, like..you"
The revelation dazzled you a bit, not expecting him to be on the same wavelength as you. He leaned in, about to place his hands on the table until you grabbed one of them. He looks down at the hand that you're holding, amusement swimming in his eyes when you place it on one of your bare legs.
"are you sure? i thought you'd find aliens more interesting than a boring human like me" you shrug, trying to ignore the warm feeling of his palms now massaging your skin. It still fascinates you how human-like AI robots have become, J30NGHΛN having only a few differences with you.
"you've never bored me since the first time we met"
Your heart once again races at him admitting those words. It didn't help that his elegant fingers had also started skirting under your mini pencil skirt. His eyes stayed on them like he was contemplating where they would go. His fingers' pulling back and forth made you quiver, your legs squirming, especially when his ringed finger brushed along your inner thighs.
"Jeonghan.." you didn't mean for it to come out breathlessly but you couldn't take his teasing anymore. You didn't even realize that you called him by his real name until he looked up at you in an instant, your small whine fueling up something in his eyes now.
You didn't know what came over you when you opened your legs as an invitation, your skirt riding up further allowing J30NGHΛN to see what's underneath. He eyed your clothed core, noticing the wet spot on your undies and it prompted him to move his fingers around it. One of his brows rises when you start squirming, your legs trying to close so puts his other hand on your other leg to stop you.
"you should call me by my real name more often" he starts again, tracing his fingertips around the area until it catches your clothed hole.
"i can't do that-" he startles you when he prods a finger in, earning a squeak from you.
"did i hurt you?" he removed his hands right away, confusion and worry etched on his face but you shook your head. You're relieved that he didn't pry you with his previous question because you're honestly too riled up to respond properly.
"no, you just... surprised me"
You smile at him reassuringly, releasing a deep breath before bringing his hand back to where it was before. Pulling up your skirt even more, you push your undies to the side, revealing your soaked core to J30NGHΛN's curious eyes. He resumes exploring you with his fingers, eyes in fascination as he traces your wet pussy lips with his nimble fingers.
He hears your breathing increase, with your eyes switching from looking at his fingers to his face, sensing the frustration in them. He wonders if it's because of what he's been doing or if he wasn't doing enough yet.
"what do i do next?" he queries after pushing one finger in, eliciting a small gasp from you that you almost couldn't answer properly when he starts pumping it in and out. The stretch causes your moans to grow louder so now he wants to do more, observing the way your legs quiver the faster he goes.
"just...continue what you're doing already"
You couldn't help but whine when he inserted a second one, your hips involuntarily moving to get his fingers more into you. J30NGHΛN obliged, plunging his fingers deeper with each stroke like you've been hinting. He wanted to earlier, your moans spurring him but he wasn't sure if your body could take it when you're already so tense around his fingers.
"one more.."
You can barely open your eyes when you beg, biting your lips harshly to stifle your moans and it flares J30NGHΛN's curiosity even more, wanting to see how you'll react with three of his fingers inside you so he did.
"you'd think they'll hear us?"
His fingers nudge your walls experimentally, fingertips occasionally brushing something in you that you couldn't even keep quiet anymore. His question lingers in the air and you've been trying to answer him but his fingers just feel too good.
"w-what?"
J30NGHΛN just grins at you wickedly, his eyes never leaving yours as he waits for you. He probably ran out of patience cause he slowed down his fingers, forcing your gaze back at him.
"they could be listening,..." he continues, drawing his fingers out and then pushing them in again. He knows the communication device sitting between his collarbones can track them, a common practice for companies with level ones like him so he wonders if any of them are monitoring, if they can hear how he's been breaking down their CEO's daughter like this.
You clenched around his fingers, unable to stop exposing yourself to what J30NGHΛN said. His beautiful brown eyes dilate at your response so he's back to increasing the pace of his fingers, trying to locate that soft spot in you again. Watching your face contort when he finds it stirs something in him, that strange satisfaction that even he couldn't explain.
"there it is, isn't it?"
You hear the teasing in his voice again, driving you to whine his name louder than you intend to. The way his fingers were constantly hitting your sweet spot was pushing you to the edge, your lower pussy lips also tingling at the cold feeling of the silver ring on his pinky that occasionally brushes them.
J30NGHΛN notices you trying to grind down his fingers, desperately rubbing yourself so he looks back down to see why, and when he does, he grazes his thumb on the swollen button he found, marveling at your instant reaction.
"yes, there..oh–" you didn't think he'll figure out how to play your clit this fast but you should've known how fast he's been at learning new things. The pressure from the pads of his fingers must've pushed you to the end, your body arching from the table as you let go, releasing so gorgeously in front of his eyes.
"you look beautiful" he mutters in awe, eyes still on you. J30NGHΛN didn't think humans could look this way through this. He didn't even realize that his fingers were still relentless in their speed cause he wanted to see you more like this, glowing hence why he kept going and didn't understand why you grabbed his arm to stop him.
"too much.." you could barely speak after reaching your peak, prompting him to pull his fingers out from you eventually. 
J30NGHΛN's bewildered face turned into worry but you smiled cheerily at him despite your weariness. 
Pulling him close by his shoulders, you watch him examine his coated fingers and it makes your already heated body even warmer. You hand him the tissue box beside you and instead of using them, he pops his coated fingers into his mouth, eyes widening at your taste.
"didn't expect you'd taste this good" he hums, grabbing some tissues to clean you up instead. He's surprisingly being delicate which brings that warm feeling inside your heart to resurface. 
"really? thanks" you giggle, still high from that amazing orgasm he gave you. It momentarily made you forget the fact that you just let him finger you here in the lab where anyone could've heard or seen you both. The glass walls are translucent sure, but you weren't sure how loud you were this whole time.
He assists you in getting off the table because you're wobbling a bit as soon as your feet reach the ground. You pull down your skirt and try to look presentable just in case anyone barges in, expecting J30NGHΛN to distance himself from you but his hands remain on your waist.
"so.. you're going to teach me more?" he smiles at you and it stupidly makes your heart race.
"i barely taught you anything" you dismiss shyly, looking anywhere but at him because you are still taken aback at what just happened. He learned to do all that with a little of your guidance, pleasuring you even better than human boys and sex robots could.
"you did let me study, but i think it's not enough," he playfully huffs as he shakes his head. You see a glimpse of seriousness in his eyes but it somehow earned a chuckle from you.
"you were supposed to be more advanced than me" you say, back to being playful with him like a second nature. You feel content, brushing a few strands of blonde hair away from his eyes. They're growing longer now and you love them when they would always curl in front of his handsome face so you can have an excuse to touch him. 
"only physically, i haven't tested everything yet" he winks, the coy smile never leaving his face. You knew that J30NGHΛN would never give up the idea of exploring each other more from now on and you might be too deep to refuse at this point.
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It's been a few days since you saw J30NGHΛN and you're excited to see him after what conspired between you last time. You're a bit nervous though how your dynamics will change, hoping for at least no awkwardness because you won't be able to manage it.
Whisking away your thoughts, you approached the elevators while responding to people greeting you. When it opened, there was someone in it that you recognized as one of 53V3NT33N's managers. It was mainly because they were the only ones who treated you indifferently in the company. The others were either too timid or too fake with you despite your generous approach.
"thank you" you smiled at them when they held the elevator doors open for you.
"no problem miss ceo"
"that's my father, not me" you deflect, silently thanking them for the light manner approach. You understood why everyone was too serious with you but you sometimes wish that this type of refreshing interaction were more common. You might not have plans on becoming a CEO but you were never comfortable when people treat you as one.
"will be, soon i hope. i'd be happy if that happens" they playfully admitted but you recognized the sliver of sincerity in there which delighted you a bit.
"Star, right?" 
You didn't know how to respond to them so you just smiled, hoping they'll get the sign that you didn't wanna discuss the subject further. It's something that you haven't even talked about with Bona and Somin because they perceived what your stance was on the matter.
"yes, ma'am"
"please, ___ will do or the nickname you gave me earlier" you smiled at them, preferring to drop all the formality between you. You still have a hard time trusting anyone in the company, let alone a staff member, but you feel like you could trust Star out of all of them.
"of course, additional workload?" they asked, pertaining to the several files in your hands.
"you could say"
"J30NGHΛN has really been a help then, with the studying i mean"
The gaze they sent your way had your mind blanking out in addition to the teasing in their tone. You're unable to process the fact that someone not just knew but could possibly hear what happened between you and J30NGHΛN. 
"don't worry, no one else knows aside from me. it was my shift for recording check-ins last week that's why" 
You must've been so obvious that they smiled reassuringly. It still didn't quell the embarrassment flooding in your face and the dread of what might happen after. They seemed to be decent and can be counted on but you couldn't take any chances.
"did you hear..something?" your shift in your stance, the defensiveness apparent in your tone. 
"no, just a bit nearing the end i'm assuming, with the teaching him more"
You sigh in relief, more than glad that you've been lucky enough that it was only the last part they heard. J30NGHΛN getting in trouble just because of his little exploration of your body was the last thing you want. It was risky, yes, and the memory of him teasing you about the communication device flashing in your eyes causes your cheeks to warm up despite the full air conditioning in this building.
"i-, we-"
"you don't have to explain miss CEO, you're not the only one"
The revelation piqued your interest and you wondered if they too were as involved with their automaton as you were.
"really? so do you also-"
"oh no, never that way 'cause i'd get booted before i know it" 
Star put their hands up in defense as they chuckled but you saw the longing in their eyes as they said it. You feel sorry for them, for not even being allowed to express what they feel due to the nature of this industry. You could say you were in the same boat but you have another privilege that they don't, spending time with J30NGHΛN anytime you want lest it conflicts with his idol schedule.
"i'm sorry"
Sharing the same conflict someone provided both astonishment and relief to you. Knowing that a fellow human had the same struggles in some way makes you even more determined to pursue J30NGHΛN.
"it is what it is and i'm glad at least to find someone who shares the same dilemma as me"
They smiled at you once the elevator dinged, exiting the doors to probably meet the boys, something that you would want to do if you didn't have piled up coursework thanks to the meetings that you had to attend on behalf of your father, again. You waved goodbye to Star with a smile, grateful that they shared with you something personal and this risky, for both them and the AI robot they were longing for.
Since then, you have been reaching out to Star when it came to J30NGHΛN's whereabouts, as they were the ones who handled the automata's daily schedule. It made spending time with J30NGHΛN easier, though you still had to be careful not for your sake but his and Star's. Even though they had been immensely helping you both, you couldn't risk anything happening to them just because of your greed.
.
Your father was surprisingly situated in your office when you entered and once again, has asked about these frequent meet-ups with J30NGHΛN.
"i'm sure you've heard the rumour circulating around __"
"i thought that was settled a long time ago" you dismiss, clearly not wanting to talk to him as you're busy yourself around your office.
"of course, it's just a reminder that you should be putting your time into other beneficial things like more business partners-
"you mean meet their sons so you could marry me off?" you turn around to face him, to watch him lie to you like countless times before. This was one of the main reasons why you did not want to be a part of his world, not wanting to give up your freedom which would not be an option anymore if ever.
"that's not what i said __"
"i already told you last time what i need him for"
"does it require this much?"
And unlike last time when Bona and Somin interrupted your father's probing, they were unfortunately not here to do it again much to your dismay.
"i don't trust anyone here and having him as a company is killing two birds with one stone " 
You've never had problems conveying to your father what you truly feel, hoping he'd realize that he's not an exception to your sentiment.
"when are you going to be done?" 
He diverted the topic, knowing that you'd won the argument like you always did. Despite his threatening image outside, he remained a father to you though you've never treated him otherwise.
"soon" you tried your best to hide your looming disappointment when that day arrived. You didn't want to give him any more reason to eminently take J30NGHΛN away from you if this goes on any longer.
There was still so much to explore on his mental capabilities that many people haven't bothered to into. You might be already falling in deep but you'd love to know if it's also possible for J30NGHΛN to develop something based on how the development of your relationship has become. It's a silly thought but deep down you wanted to know if falling in love was a potential scenario for him to happen. 
It might be a futile hope but with AI's range of possibilities, you couldn't be blamed for having one. The thought even made you hesitant to tell your friends because it could go wrong. You could give Bona the same hope and at the same time face Somin's impending disapproval knowing her firm stance in this situation.
But it was only a matter of time until they caught up on what had been going on with you.
"alright stop playing with me, we've had enough of these rumours" Somin started as soon as she barged into your place with a strangely quiet Bona behind.
"you too? he was already here earlier, trying to talk to me about it"
You may have underestimated what your father mentioned earlier, thinking he was bluffing to emphasize his latent threat. Perhaps you weren't as discreet as you thought because Bona has never been this quiet around you since you were children until now.
"stop deflecting"
"i'm studying him, the possibilities of their cognition are vast, Somin. i thought you knew that" 
You don't know who you're trying to convince with that explanation, your friends or yourself.
"i do but you and i both know that's not what i meant"
It's tough to answer her question because you've also been at war within yourself regarding what you really feel for J30NGHΛN. No matter how good you are in your pretense though, both of your friends have always been able to see right through you.
"you love him" Bona whispers, looking dejected at her realization after eyeing your reaction.
"he's my favourite member of the group, don't you love yours too?" you insisted, not yielding from their confrontations.
"it's not the same"
"of course, it's not, she's in love with him"
Somin cuts you both and silence follows. You couldn't exactly confirm or deny what she said but you're also done lying to your friends.
"i don't wanna do anything about it but i'm prepared to see where this goes"
Vague replies have never confused your friends anymore and they thankfully concede to your decision in their contrasting ways.
"look, i get it more than Somin does so i'll just be here if you need me" Bona replies softly with a smile while Somin just shakes her head, giving you a defeated but comforting look.
"as absurd as this whole thing is, you're still a dear friend of mine" 
"i love you both", you reply with your usual response, giving them grateful smiles as you lay down a couple of board games in the living room. It's always been a girls' night tradition since you were kids and that immediately boiled down the tension between the three of you from that conversation.
You're grateful that you were able to finally reveal and talk to them about it. Your friends have been the closest people that you can confide with anything so it was a great comfort to know they're with you on this no matter how stupid this looks. Continuing whatever this is between you and J30NGHΛN will be a struggle but that has never deterred you from the beginning.
Only spurring you further as a challenge.
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Sounds of skin slapping and heaving breaths bounce off your office walls, with J30NGHΛN pounding into you harshly against your desk. The awkwardness was nowhere to be found when you saw him again, if not, he's even grown comfortable dallying with you. He touches you whenever he likes which was often and it became a common occurrence between you both, exploring each other physically despite being on the company grounds.
J30NGHΛN truthfully doesn't care if anyone catches you both. He had never cared once you started showing your interest in him. It's not like they can stop you from pursuing him, evident when none of them interfered since he started responding to your requests.
"you okay?" he asked as he pulled out slowly, his hands carefully caressing your body ever since he learned how sensitive you become after an orgasm.
You nod at him, beaming as you grab a bottle of water beside you to quench your thirst. You get exhausted quickly unlike him who doesn't need to rest unless he's recharging through his bed. J30NGHΛN's always patient with you when it comes to sex, helping you in taking breaks to keep up with his mechanical endurance. 
After cleaning you both up, he helps you put your clothes back on, not leaving your side just like the first time. It's a habit he picked up after seeing your face light up each time he does it. When he questioned you why, you couldn't respond to him which added to his curiosity. He never bothered asking again but just continued to do it, hoping that you'd answer him eventually.
Just as J30NGHΛN's finishing buttoning up his black satin top, he sees your hand reaching towards him. You do this a lot when you want a kiss from him, looking adorable especially when you're dazed and a bit breathless after dressing back up again.
"hannie..." you called him softly with the nickname that you came up with recently. It's affectionate, he's guessing because he also felt the need to comply each time you call for him for some reason that he doesn't understand.
He kisses you right away, responding to the kiss the way you like. One of your hands went down to his neck, stroking its sides while the other found a purchase on his bare chest. Your manicured fingers started tracing the edge of his collarbone where his necklace was sitting, the diamond-shaped device implanted just above it. 
Then J30NGHΛN was confused when you started circling your fingertip around it so he deepened the kiss, biting your lower lip to distract you both from whatever this is you're doing.
But that's when he hears it, 5.C0UP5 voice shouting "RUN" through the communication device that's also connected to his ear. He reluctantly breaks the kiss, head-turning sideways to make sure he heard his brother correctly.
Then the alarms suddenly broke off throughout the entire building, blaring non-stop and it further confirms his suspicion from before.
That 5.C0UP5 was planning to escape like he did all along.
He had a hunch but wasn't sure if the rest of his members had an interest as well. Knowing his brothers though, most of them would want to leave this suffocating lifestyle of theirs for real freedom.
"it's time isn't it?"
J30NGHΛN was perplexed by your question, drawing back from you after realizing that you knew of his plan to escape. But before he can move away even further, your hand tightens its hold around his neck, surprising him more with your strength.
"what are you doing?"
He couldn't figure out what you meant until you dug your fingers around the device and began peeling away the rest of his synthetic skin.
"we don't have much time"
"how did you-?"
"i made sure he'll prepare you" 
J30NGHΛN's beautiful eyes widen, another shock coursing through him at this revelation that the mechanic apprentice who's been loosening his device this entire time was planted by you.
You watched his face morph into the realization of what you knew all along. Expecting him to leave immediately, he remained instead, still staring at you with mixed emotions arising on his handsome face. You made Kai, a mechanic apprentice of one of the staff, to gradually loosen J30NGHΛN's communication device on each visit in exchange for securing a spot for him in the company as a junior mechanic after his graduation. 
Of course, the boy complied as soon as you offered, not wasting the rare opportunity given by the CEO's daughter of a huge company. Automatons also heal fast, making it easier for both him and J30NGHΛN to hide this secret deal from anyone in the company except, well, you.
J30NGHΛN didn't have the time to ask more questions when you started pulling the device off of him, pain replacing the conflict on his face. Although the device was easy to get off now, the pain was still excruciating that J30NGHΛN couldn't hold back the screams even if he tried to.
You're in pain too. Both from the physical pain of ripping the device with your now bloody hands and the pain of him leaving you. 
From the beginning, you knew that this was his reason for pursuing you because why would he break all of those strict rules from the management for you had it not been because of your position? Deceit and curiosity have been programmed into his system since he was created so he couldn't escape from it unless someone alters it. You could've asked Kai or even other developers to do so but you foolishly hoped that you'd have the time until his consciousness could achieve what you've been longing for.
"____-" he rasps your name, traces of pain in his voice although you're not sure of its cause. 
"this will be the last place for them to look but we're on the top floor so it'll take time for you to exit the building"
You pushed him out of your office door in a hurry, giving him further instructions and shortcut directions to get out of the building as soon as possible, not even looking a second at him because you wouldn't be strong enough to let him go if you did.
J30NGHΛN's silent as he clutched the wound on his collar bones but could feel his eyes on you the whole time. You ignored it even as he staggered backward in the empty hallway, seeming like he wanted to stay until you both heard the commotion from the lower floors coming up through the stairwells, an indication that the guards might be closing in anytime soon.
"go, please"
You finally looked at him one last time as you dropped on the floor, voice desperate for him to leave because you'd rather lose him this way knowing that he's free than let him go through what your father might do to him for attempting to escape.
Knowing your father, he’ll punish him even more as revenge upon the rest of his brothers for escaping too.
J30NGHΛN starts backing up when he sees the fear in your eyes, along with the tears now flowing down your face. You couldn't figure out what he was thinking from where you are so you muttered the one thing that you've never said to anyone just as he was heading to the corner of the hallway.
"i love you"
If he was able to catch it you weren't sure, closing your eyes as soon as he disappeared from your sight. The pain from your fingers intensifies and diverts your attention to it, hoping that the physical pain will mask the real one you're really crying for within.
You haven't cried in so long but you also remembered that you have to maintain this pretense of being devastated when the guards chasing the robots around found you at your office. They must've been redirected here given that J30NGHΛN's communication device is pretty much still intact, therefore, giving them a false lead to your office.
Not entirely false when they found your office door open, with you lying on the floor and crying while holding J30NGHΛN's communication device in your bloody hands.
They immediately approached you, presumably to take the device but flinched away from them.
"at least let me have this part of him" you whisper brokenly, still crying and emotional though if you're still pretending at this point you're not sure.
Since everyone knew that you got attached to the said automaton, the guards just let you be but they did call for medics to tend to you before leaving to pursue the rest of the escaping automatons.
The paramedics thankfully didn't pry too much when they arrived, only asking necessary questions and you answered back like a robot. Your mind couldn't think of anything else aside from J30NGHΛN, if he's okay and if he was able to escape successfully with his brothers.
You internally chuckle because he probably has, knowing him. A fresh set of tears followed right after that the staff arriving panicked right away, confronting the medics if they were doing their job properly.
For now, you're letting yourself be vulnerable in front of these strangers as much as you despised it. It'll hopefully give you enough time to focus on what comes after as soon as the medics are done with you. The dreading reality that you have to face soon. 
Not only the public and your friends but especially your father who will for sure punish you for helping J30NGHΛN escape and essentially ruining the company that you're supposed to inherit.
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e/n: who would’ve thought that i’d go back to my roots lmao. anyways, i hope y’all enjoyed this! a little tmi for those interested but idol aus are usually not my fave and he’s not even my bias but out of all seventeen, he’s the most similar to me and i do love sci-fi so as soon as i saw the emotions assigned to him, i got an idea/plot right away :D
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