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#meanwhile im sitting there like. Holy Shit Dad just ruined the whole show oh my god
maleksrami · 4 years
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sleeping-lilies · 3 years
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robin era jason, dick, and babs headcanons because there’s too much comedic potential to ignore
- dick and babs were the ultimate gossip buddies. whenever dick was with the titans for long periods of time, babs always filled him in on everything
babs: dick you’ll never believe what hal said to bruce last night, i even have videos. dick, the look on his face please—
dick, immediately locking doors so his teammates don’t hear the mad shit about to be dropped on main: tell me everything
- vice versa too, dick filled babs in on everything going on with the titans and all they can say is thank god those lines are bat secured with no villains being able to listen in, imagine deathstroke hearing through bat gossip that joey’s dating who?!?! 😳
- batkids have been and always will be the holder of superhero gossip. it’s a business, you see, but we’re getting off topic 😡
- lmfao anyways this is literally how dick finds out about jason
babs: anyways, jason—
dick: who the fuck is jason
babs: ....
dick: barbara?!?!
babs: ok promise you won’t freak out
- babs and dick’s first reaction upon meeting jason being “why is he so small i wasnt that small” “dick you were literally nine when you were robin—“ “he’s tiny” it’s like those two share the same braincell
- i’m making it so that dick gave jason his number earlier because i feel like it 😡😡😡 (not that it changes much other than the fact that i want more gossip dropped in dm’s)
- when dick gave jason his number, he went to babs like “give me jason’s number” “didn’t you literally just give him your’s?” “ya but i’m gonna make sure he texts me” “ya ok that’s fair”
- whenever jason didn’t want to be in the manor (fight with bruce, boredom, etc) he went to wherever the fuck babs lived and they would facetime dick and talk mad shit. it was a thing.
- despite them all being able to drive, babs was the only one during this time with an actual, legitimate, legal license (jason was too young to have a license and dick is too lazy/busy/whatever-excuse-he-wants-to-use to take the permit and driving test) so babs drove them around everywhere and it was a mess™ consisting of a bunch of backseat drivers
- “dick omg look at this video i found from the batcave” “omg he said robin gives him magic” “robin gives him magic” they both cry about it for years to come
- babs sometimes kidnapped jason after school after telling the head of wayne manor (alfred) and took him to get ice cream, then to the library while she worked. jason was the greatest kid in the library, he even had his own throne special chair just for him whenever he came provided by library staff who adored this absolute angel.
- jason 🤝 babs 🤝 dick -> i believe in annoying yet endearing nicknames supremacy
- nicknames include (some used by some more than others or just one, or by both equally because they’re annoying pick and choose my good people)
little wing (iconic, we all know this one fellas and who uses it)
red (used for babs, absolutely fantastic, but in the future it gets confusing because some people with their goddamn hero names 😡)
boy wonder (classic, babs calls them both that)
barbie (for babs, jason uses this one and he’s the only one able to get away with it)
dickie (jason just really gets away with everything huh)
dickhead (jason’s lucky he’s cute)
baba black sheep (jeez i’m on a roll with babs’ nicknames she’s so nickname-able and that’s very cool and sexy of her)
jay z
jay allen
jay jay jay (shut up, dickhead—)
big bird
and a bunch more i’m too tired to look for them in canon or make new ones up, but you get the idea
- dick can totally bake, and babs and jason keep bugging him when he’s baking and add more chocolate chips while pretending to not notice that he can see them 😡😡😡
- headcanon that jason had hero worship for babs and dick because they’re so cool in and out of costume and it never really went away when he got older listen his older brother and pseudo sister are so cool and that’s not his fault but he’ll never admit it
- barbie movie marathons because barbie is an iconic legend and they all recognize it. they have the fucking “she’s the queen of the WA-A-A-AVES” song memorized along with all other barbie movie songs, they sing it on patrol.
- dick and jason’s sibling dynamic was and is basically “ur a little shit and i hate you but i will literally kill for you”
- dick had tension with bruce while jason was just a little shit who would totally cause drama for the sake of it, and people never take advantage of this absolute power duo for destroying bruce
- dick sending cryptid texts to jason through a burner phone because he’s dramatic jason totally knew it was him about things that drive bruce mad, like leaving the shower turned to the coldest setting before bruce got there, leaving the lights in the batcave on, etc. jason, a wise little child, totally took advantage of this. bruce came to accept his fate
- the gc names, guys the group chat names
- jason crashing into titans tower whenever he wants and dick doesn’t bat (hAH) an eye, occasionally he very sweetly asks babs to come with him and she agrees but only sometimes because some people have jobs, jason—wait dick is being flirted with by who?!?! i’ll leave it up to your imagination ;) and they totally crashed titans missions too
- one time bruce was busy with the league while alfred was on vacation and bruce absolutely could not dip (i’m imagining bruce getting a call from the headmaster during an honest to god fight and bruce just picking up while punching the daylights out of some asshole) (“mr wayne, what is that noise in the background?” “sorry, headmaster, the cat is having a seizure”), so when jason got into a “fight” (read: some jackass picking on jason before he snapped and yelled at him and the bitchass kid tried to punch him and jason’s no quitter) bruce called dick who was an adult and legally family (yes dick is adopted sometime after jason was, stay mad) like “son... son please” and dick was like “oh no need to plead with me, this is too good” but of course this bitchass doesn’t have an actual lisence yet and he was hanging out with babs anyways so he and babs rolled up to gotham academy and the kids stared at them like “holy shit they’re so cool” ya dick and babs are those power couple, whether romantic or not, that turn heads, they’re just that powerful strolled into the office, bailed jason out while intimidating the headmaster because the altercation was the result of school staff negligence of actual bullying like those cliche tropes, said “ayyy you got that brat good” and get him chili dogs or whatever the fandom made robin jason’s favorite food. omg i just made an entire fanfic in rough draft form someone please steal it and write it in full form and send me the link
- jason is very very tiny, you see. babs and dick pick him up and move him for any reason, whether because they want to sit on that chair or to just throw him out of harm’s way and take the bullet for themselves.
- jason and dick both get adorable blushes on their faces it’s genetic yes that’s how genetics work shut up meanwhile babs’ ears turn red when she’s embarrassed and all three of them clown each other for it
- i yelled about this to my mutual (cough cough @littlespaceboii) who also added to this absolute dogshit headcanon and then in the discord full of mutuals, but the basement of wayne manor is haunted. dick found it when he was a little gremlin (i stand by that dick was the original demon child) (“you see damian, before there was you there was me” the real reason he was good with damian lmfao) and was like “omg this is so cool” @littlespaceboii came up with that it was just alfred fucking with bruce and so when jason first came and dick was comfy around him he was like “so have you been in the basement” and jason was like “im literally robin i’ve been in the batcave?!?!” and dick goes “no the basement, the haunted one” and jason’s like “hAUNTED?!?!” cuz jason has at least some self preservations and knows not to fuck with the spookies until he too became a spooky and bruce was like “there’s no ghost it’s not haunted” because he’s a skeptic and a party pooper and babs is like “no go on let him finish” even though she knows full well there are no ghosts or does she? and uhhhh basically they becomes ghostbusters 2.0 but cooler and funnier
- this trio is basically baby pan/bisexual jason and two resident expert pan/bisexuals solidarity but that’s literally canon. they go to pride every year that jason’s alive what who said that?
- they all tease each other for their crushes like all siblings/family friends do, i don’t need to say it but it’s important that’s emphasized for my well being
- yelled about this in the discord to the mutuals who added onto this absolute train wreck too, but jason used to play baseball during his robin days, and dick never showed up to those games with being busy as an excuse, but babs always showed up with bruce and alfred and took pictures for dick so dick could be like “mlb players are jobless now that little wing is on the scene” babs (and sometimes bruce) always shouted loudest for jason whether he was in the field or in the dugout and jason would get this extremely adorable blush on his face (jason finds out in the future why dick never showed up (cough cough ptsd from two face’s massive baseball bat which led to everything that came after including being fired and veangance academy and nearly killing two face and omg that’s a ride) and is like oh my god my childhood is even more ruined—)
- remember when i said dick got adopted after jason did in this new absolutely fabulous canon i just created? bruce did that because “ahhh fuck that’s my kid and i want him to know i love him through every means possible since i have the ability to do so” i believe in good dad bruce supremacy and made a whole thing where he invited dick to dinner for like a week to work up the courage and bonding to ask him and show him the adoption papers and then everyone cried :) bruce decided to finally adopt dick after jason referred to dick as his brother and bruce was like “...oh” and alfred was like 👀
- dick, as the first child hero and one of the first heroes period like at least a year or two before babs, holds the “back in my day” card over literally everyone in the hero community in general and pulls it out to annoy babs and jason even tho babs literally joined the scene only a year or two after dick
jason, shaking in his panties: it’s so fucking cold
dick, standing strong in his tits out outfit, who had to wear the panties on his own decision: oh, you’re cold? back in my day—
babs, throwing her boot at his face: god shut the fuck up—
and then dick doesn’t give back her boot and it becomes a whole thing with lots of tackling and play fighting and someone nearly gets thrown off they rooftop for funsies but anyways
also on a side note, babs would take off her cape and wrap it around jason whenever she noticed his discomfort with the weather, or use the weather as an excuse whenever she saw him uneasy for whatever reason and they never mention it to each other
- yelled about this in the discord to the mutuals at some point too holy shit i have friends, but those three are team rocket. they went out as team rocket for halloween one year after bullying bruce to let jason out only jason because he can’t tell dick and babs what to do and jason is under his care and when they do convince him, dick and babs bully jason into being meowth. manifesting jason in a meowth onesie ARTISTS PLEASE—
- dick finally took his license seriously and took his driver’s test after babs became paralyzed.
- those were a rough few months for those three. and then another rough few months for those two
- yikes, sorry to throw angst at you (sorry (unfeeling)) anyways, in the future alfred finds those old photos and shows the rest of the fam, so dick and babs bully jason, 6’2 jason that towers way above both of them, and once again bullies him into being meowth “for tradition, little wing!” “shut up, dickhead” the rest of the batkids lose their shit over this, naturally. bruce and alfred stand in the back teary eyed reminiscing the old days when things were a little more simple.
- discowing walked so terrifying handsome squidward red hood helmet could run (even tho the ugly helmet tripped and fell and missed the mark because discowing wasn’t ugly and will always remain superior, i feel i have committed a terrible crime comparing the two)
dick: jason what the fuck is that
jason: it’s fashion
dick: it’s terrifying
jason: i’m only following in my older brother’s footsteps 😔
dick: listen here, you little shit strangles him haha just kidding that illegal wait theyre vigilantes they don’t follow the law—
- these three and cass refer to the rest of the batkids as “the kids” (if she’s older than jason, sometimes she is and sometimes she isn’t and i’m really confused but whatever)
- babs and dick’s relationship with jason pre death literally shaped how jason treats his siblings post pit madness like he literally goes “what would red and big bird do?!??” when he needs to go into big brother mode over the “little ones” (“little” because tim and steph are adults and duke is nearly an adult himself oh my god he’ll graduate from high school soon and jason never got to do that himself he’s totally going to the ceremony legally dead or not) 🥺
- holy trinity continue hanging out with each other, whether lunch or games or whatever, and just enjoy each other’s company after long, rough years
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moonlit-imagines · 4 years
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Headcanons for being Tony Stark’s Daughter (The Aftermath)
Tony Stark x daughter!reader
warnings:
a/n: y/n is about 17 or 18; i cried while writing this. sorry this is really long!!! pls forgive me 🥺
prompt: takes place from a3 to smffh
The Early Years (1) The Teenage Years (2) The Intense Years (3) Continued (5)
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let’s start on a happy note! ahahah
so for a while, earth was calm
you, pepper, and tony got to be a family for a while
wedding planning!
of course you got to try the ben&jerry’s ice cream named after your dad: Stark Raving Hazelnuts
“it’s not fair that you got ice cream named after you and i didn’t”
“well, when you grow up to be as awesome as me, maybe you’ll get your own ice cream flavor”
developing nanotech suits together for a Bonding Experience(tm)
speechless after the first test
“dad, this is...”
“the coolest thing to ever exist?”
“yes!!”
yall ready for some shit?
the day that ebony maw invaded was pretty—what’s the word? interesting? no. well, yes, but...HORRIBLE.
it all started when you got the call from your dad
“y/n, incoming call from ‘big fat meanie’”
“god, i really have to change that. okay, JOSHIE, answer it. hey, dad? what’s up?”
“hey, kid! you know that weird ass building on bleecker street? how fast can you get here?”
“JOSH can you track FRIDAY really quick? lets see how far dad is...uh, okay, be there in five, see ya”
taking your suit for a spin and realizing how GREAT it was to be able to basically fold up your suit and put it in your back pocket
knocking on the door and it opened on its own, it was kinda cool
“is this a museum? cool.”
bruce turning around to see you after about three years and giving you an awkward smile and a wave while you stood frozen around the wizard-guys
“y/n, god, you’ve grown up!”
charging into him for a long overdue hug
“you don’t know how much i missed you. it’s been chaotic without you”
“i can...i can only imagine”
a debriefing on the situation you were about to face, and bonus! having to play the catch-up game with bruce
“just call him, dad. we need as much help as we can. steve will understand”
rushing outside to face off with some ugly-ass aliens
“oh nooo, it’s roger smith from american dad”
bruce: 👀, stephen: 👀, wong: 👀, tony: 👏👏🥰 that’s my girl
simultaneous nanosuit unveiling
“you ready for this one, pops?”
“of course! ive waited years to kick some more alien ass”
montage of you and tony getting your asses beat together (as a family <3)
peter showing up
“give me one good reason why i shouldn’t send you back to that school bus”
“because i’m good company?”
“whatever, just listen to whatever dad has to say, i forfeit my responsibilities over you”
pew pew, repulsors, pew, tiny rockets! fun! action! destroying new york again and again. good times...
until JOSHUA gave you notice that your dad was flying high
“call him. now.”
“hey! how’s it going down there?”
“dad, you know how i feel about you and space”
“i know, i know. i just...i gotta take care of this. keep pepper safe for your old man, okay?”
“i lo—l—ve y—”
“y/n? y/n?! i love you! shit!”
“we lost connection with her, sir”
trying to call peter
“call failed, y/n. should i try again?”
“i’m gonna kill them...”
walking through the rubble to find bruce, the only sensible man you know
taking him to the avengers compound asap to get to rhodey and figure out what comes next
meanwhile, tony was dealing with space and another teenager
and worrying a lot about leaving you on earth
“i mean, mr. stark, y/n’s one of the most capable people i know. she’s probably trying to fix this whole mess as we speak”
“i didn’t get to tell her i love her”
“oh...”
having a lovely meeting with thaddeus ross with rhodey, having a lovely time watching them passive-aggresively argue until your former teammates arrived
having to patiently (and professionally) wait for ross to hang up before running into them for a hug
“holy shit, you guys have no idea how bad i’ve wanted to see you. it sucks not being all together anymore”
“i know, y/n. we’ve all missed you.” -cap
“a lot” -nat added
bruce’s little entrance that was sure to bring some awkwardness
you, secretly freaking out about your dad
sam was the one that found you crying after you “stepped out” for a few minutes too long
“oh, y/n,” he was contemplating grabbing someone else to step in, but decided to sit next to you in the hallway, “i’m sorry, kiddo. i can’t promise you anything, but your dad is a fighter. a big pain in the ass. i think your odds are good”
laughing through your tears
“yeah, you’re right. thanks, sammy”
he gave you a little hug while you calmed down
getting to business, the ass-kicking kind
as the wise natasha romanoff once said to your father, you were being “uncharacteristically non-hyper verbal”
your mind did this funny thing...wandered into places it really should not go
the talk about sacrificing vision led to wakanda, where you had a swell time patrolling
“guys! we’ve got incoming. a lot of incoming”
well-deserved uncle/niece team up. who wouldve thought?
you would have nightmares about these aliens for years to come
“you get to die, and you get to die! everybody gets to die!”
“y/n, what did we talk about?” -rhodey
“using humor as a defense mechanism makes the team uncomfortable...”
covering the girls 😌 because we gotta have those all-girl teamups, uh-huh?
some more blasting
thor made his comeback and you just could not miss it
“hi, thor!”
you landed next to him and your helmet receded
“well, hello, miss y/n! good to see you again! my, you got taller...oh! meet my friends: rabbit and tree”
having a “what the actual fuck” moment upon seeing thanos for the first time
and flying at him from behind with a massive nanotech blade ready to kill this purple bastard
but he grabbed your arm and flung you into the dirt, that was gonna leave a mark
“i just had to make a suit when i was ten...no one stopped me, huh? i couldn’t be elon’s kid, he was a nice guy”
watching thanos snap his fingers and looking around to see dust floating through the air and thanos retreat
“rhodey? uncle rhodey?!”
“i’m right here, kid, don’t worry”
he grabbed your hand while you were dusting
“tell my dad i love him, promise?”
fading away and leaving rhodey with your last words
he was mad before anything else
all he could think about was a promise your dad made him take years back
“rhodey, you keep my daughter safe no matter what, promise?”
the avengers recooperating at the compound, waiting to figure out whether any of the space-crew survived
they had to let pepper know that you didn’t make it, she was a mess upon hearing that news
tony finally making his way back to earth
and stumbling out of that ship
“where’s y/n? where is she?!”
“tony, tony, calm down”
“dont tell me to calm down! where is my daughter?!”
“she made me promise to tell you thay she loves you”
tony knew the answer by now, he lost his mind over your death
it didn’t feel right not having you by his side, for the past 18 years you’ve been with him
after a long period of recovery, tony and pepper moved on, got married, built a home, had a new daughter...
tony made sure there was a spare room for you
he put all the things you left behind in it
there were so many photos of you in the house
and he’d show your sister, morgan, all of them. he wanted morgan to know her sister
“that’s y/n when she built her first robot. it snuck up on me a few times. it went ‘boo!’”
morgan loved the stories about you, but she didn’t understand why she couldn’t see you
“when do i get to meet her?”
“uh...maybe someday, sweetie”
after being unbothered for almost 5 years, the remaining avengers came back with a plan that was so tempting, he just wanted his little girl back
cracking under pressure and telling pepper that he couldn’t ignore this mission because it was his chance to get you back
“get her back, tony”
“you think so?”
“i miss her, too.”
and so it began, he made it his mission to get you back
peeking at the wallet picture of you on his shoulders when you were so little
tony travelling to 2012; loki’s invasion
and there you were, the sassy genius 12 year old that he missed so much
“we’ve got this, tony, we’ll bring her home” -scott
and then things went badly and also 2012 tony went into cardiac arrest and 2012 y/n dove onto the floor to tend to him
“dad? give us some room, would you?!”
2023 tony smiling at how much he missed you worrying about him and how reckless he was
but also...the mission kinda went bad so that sucked
push it a bit farther back and now tony was with grandpa stark! asking how to be a dad and all that!
he could barely stand still waiting for you to come back to him, god he missed you more than he thought
and after a bit of hard work, it was time to snap
just like that, you were back in wakanda, puzzled by the gap in time before one of dr. strange’s portals opened in front of you
and then you were in the ruins of the avengers compound
“JOSHUA, can you locate my dad?”
“i think you’ll be able to see him”
“wow, i cant believe i programmed your cocky artificial ass”
“i think you can”
seeing your dad flying high and patching into the comms
“miss me, old man?”
and then he hit the gas to get to you and when this man hugged you, you almost couldn’t let go
“i’m so sorry, y/n. god, i’m sorry. these last five years...i was so lost without you”
“it’s okay, dad, i’m here now”
getting shot at during your reunion
“son of a bitch...we’re having a family moment here, asshole!”
yes, im gonna say it again. of course i am! and.........father/daugher team-up
the last one
“peter, is that you? you asshole! i cant believe you went to space without me!”
“missed you too!”
rhodey!! cant forget about uncle rhodey!!
“you gave my dad the message, right?”
“it was your dying wish, of course i did!”
“great. don’t forget i love you, too, rhodey!”
“couldn’t let me forget it”
lest we forget that pepper joined the fight?
plot twist: (step)mother/daughter team-up
mother/father/daugher team up!!!! ultimate stark machine!!!!!!!
and then you left him alone for 5 minutes and he’s got the infinity stones and you know it’s the last time you’re going to see him and you cant decide what your next move is and you’re just frozen and you cant catch your breath and he snaps and your heart plummets
you have to rush to his side, the last time you can sit beside his tired body and let him know that its going to be okay
“hey dad, it’s okay, we’re gonna be fine. thank you for everything”
peter grabbing your hand as you both sobbed next to your dad, feeling robbed of your time with him
pepper brought you home where she told you all about the five years you missed
both of you just cried harder than you’ve ever cried before
“so i have a sister?”
morgan was so happy to meet you, she couldn’t contain herself, practically latched onto you
and she didn’t fully understand what happened to tony
you saw your new room for the first time and didn’t leave it for a while, occasionally pepper or morgan would pop in
morgan actually crawled into bed with you a few times
the funeral was one of the worst days of your life
the remnants of your young life pulled back together for one day
then you hid back in your room before you heard a knock
“who is it?”
“it’s happy”
“come in”
“hey, kiddo. me and morgan are gonna get some cheeseburgers, you wanna come?”
she really was a stark
after a long hibernation, you started to get back into the groove of your old life
but the press was brutal and harsh, you were bombarded with questions regarding your dad
it took everything not to explode on camera
you stayed in contact with the rest of the avengers, mourning your dead, keeping the support system, staying a family
it was all you could get...for now
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