#meanwhile two natures is pretentious because im being pretentious | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

bugflies00 · 1 year

Text

RIGHT so the pirate au

well it's nothing very original don't get your hopes up or anything BUT. basically it's mainly lmancrew (with a crimeboys focus) and tntduo centered and it's set in like a medieval-esque fictional setting like basically six of crows minus the magic. like i literally typed six of crows into pinterest to get good images those are the vibes

wilbur's captain of this ship called the l'manberg (ok no but i hesitated between naming the fish or their og town lmanburg but i ended up naming the ship that because i just think it's such a good ship name like . she/her in a boat way. does this make sense) and the crew is niki, jack, eret, fundy and tubbo (well obviously theres more people cause how would a ship Function but the rest of those are Unnamed background characters).

wilbur's also a pretty high ranked official like idk general or captain of the guard idk how the military works i would have to figure that out, but basically he's kinda famous and so's his ship. they aren't participating in a war it's more of like an explorer position because wilbur's known for being a brilliant cartographer and so the previous king just kinda appointed him to this new position to let him fuck off & do his own thing mapping the whole world with his crew. the issue is the old king died with no heir and replaced by his nephew (dream) who's much more controlling and power-hungry than he was and who doesn't want to waste money & resources on some bs like maps. this will create Conflict (im so good at narration guys. Help)

tommy's like a homeless orphan (as he alwyas is) and really needs a job and money and all that and he hears the l'manburg isn't at sea for once and wilbur & his crew are taking a rest at the capital for a couple days before sailing back off again. naturally he sneaks in, lives in the storage room for like a week or two, surviving off scraps of food . then tubbo stumbles across him and almost reports him, but tommy convinces him not to and so tubbo helps him for a couple days. then someone else finds him, and he's brought to the captain and they all threaten to throw the stowaway overboard (they wouldn't actually they're all kinda softies) and tommy's like pissing himself from how scared he is especially cause wilbur's like . this really famous general who's had books and songs written about him and shit (he doesn't know yet hes just an annoying pretentious prick (/lovingly)) so he's like Ohmygod im dead and then wilbur's like . "Can you cook" "erm no" "can you clean" "yeah ig" "Can you fight even somewhat decently" "yeah bitch me and my knives are the best they call me th-" "Ok you're hired" AND THUS tommy joins the crew

and so they keep on sailing with their mission yadda yadda and WHAM they encounter the most notorious pirate crew of the continent, named, you guessed it, las nevadas. and tommy's heard a lot of proper horror stories about them and he's terrified but the crew have fought them off a bunch of times before so they're mainly annoyed because they're gonna have to deal with the frankly disgustingly homoerotic rivalry that their captain and the pirate captain have been passionately engaging in for several years now. THATS RIGHT TNTDUO BABY oh they are so pathetic and so gay it's actually embarrassing they'll have like sword duels . wilbur's the uptight, bitchy, and somewhat pretentious general with perfectly styled hair and ornate coat always huffing and puffing and waxing poetry meanwhile quackity's the fuckin bad boy stereotype with like a half unbuttoned poet or blackshirt (slut) (wilbur cannot stop staring its embarrassing) and he's always hanging off ropes and shit and doing sick acrobatics and taunting wilbur GOD they're so. and yeah they have sword duels where all they do is "distract the opponent" in order to "efficiently win the battle" which is code for "practically make out while hurling insults at each other"

also crimeboys is like "in awe of the legendary general" "who is this child on my boat" >>> "oh my god the general's a prick" "oh my god the child's a demon" >>> "maybe he's not that bad but i would rather die and curse his entire family line than admit that" >>> "that is my brother i would die for him and if you lay a hand upon him you won't have hands anymore" (the funny thing is they both end up with that same level of protectiveness and making the same threats despite wilbur being a like Adult and high ranked official with power and influence and decades of training of elaborate swordsmanship behind him . and tommy is a stowaway fifteen year old orphan with three knives and teeth and a whole lot of anger . but they're both like "no i must protect and die for the other" im sorry i just love them ok theyre so stupid) i just LOVE crimeboys having to go through begrudging bonding instead of instantly being ride or die brothers GIVE ME TO MORE ENEMIES TO FRIENDS TO LOVERS anyway

also we also get emerald duo in the form of them being co-captains (please pretend that is a thing i know Nothing about anything ever) of this other ship and they're like independent merchants or whatever idk i have not figured out that whole bit yet MY POINT IS they're not affiliated with anyone they just sorta do their own thing and only help people if they want to or are indebted . they help out wilbur sometimes cause he's a dumbass

speaking of wilbur like i said he's had books and songs written about him (his age is kind of a grey zone like on one hand he's pretty young for a general but he's also had time to become this like famous and mysterious figure so can't be Too young . so i think probably like 27-29? smth like that) and one of them was a legend about how he fell in love with a mermaid . yes she had red hair and teal scales and her name was sally BUT SHE'S STILL AN OCEAN MERMAID I KNOW SALMONS LIVE IN RIVERS anyway . also for little tntduo crumbs he's called quackity a siren multiple times (in his mind he's insulting him like "ooh you manipulate people" and everyone around him is like "that is the Gayest thing you could possibly have said") and quackity's like "didnt you date a mermaid" "yeah but sirens are like evil mermaids" "so you want to date me" and then wilbur stabs him

ALSO more about wilbur's character development (this is a bit spoilerish but also it's not like im ever writing this full fic so you're not exactly risking much but just be warned) he starts out like i said as this really uptight military official who started when he was really young and trained really hard and flew through the ranks really fast because he worked his ass off . And so he's Very protective of his rank & title & prestige not so much because he's snobbish but because he worked so hard for it but so it often comes across as him being this like pretentious fuck (well he's also pretentious but thats just wilbur) . also he originally dreamed of being a cartographer and he spent his whole childhood drawing up maps but then he realised he couldn't make a living out of that so he decided to work hard enough to be at the top and then do what he wanted. and so he wears like his tricorn hat with a feather and his ornate coat and neatly tucked in shirt and everything cause for him it's like Proof that he Did it yknow . but then as time goes by, especially in the presence of quackity (who's very antihero-esque and so does not give a shit about ranks or whatever he's a pirate he does his own thing) and also a bit tommy (who was literally dressed in rags until they clothed and fed him but still behaves like a street rat on the most famous ship of the country) he slowly loosens up and he ends up ditching the coat and the hat and instead wears more stuff like loose poet shirts (open because he's a slut) . and so yeah character development through clothing and whatnot

ok so YEAH those are the tidbits that were plaguing my mind the most but there's definitely a whole lot more in my head like ive got a pinterest board and shit

#PFEW this got long #alex.rambles.txt #c!wilbur #c!quackity #c!tommy #c!tntduo #c!crimeboys #c!emeraldduo #c!clingyduo #mcyt #alex.pirate.au #sally the salmon

13 notes · View notes

larksinging · 5 years

Text

hey it’s @transrobro ‘s birthday today! happy birthday jay!!!

i thought it was only appropriate to take two of their favorite things and mash them together: rvb and rwby! actually this is based on an au jay came up with, i just expanded a few details for this fic. even so i hope you enjoy!

now for the sappy part: jay not a day goes by that im not happy i started talking to you more. youve been such a wonderful presence in my life and someone i am just always made better by knowing. and this year youve done a lot to stand up for yourself and take care of yourself and i am SO proud of you for that! i hope you have a great birthday today because you have absolutely earned it

The metals doors slide open and Alaska steps into the briefing room, the white of her armor tinged in glittery blue from the holographic projections. She steps up to her appropriate spot at the edge of the table, not quite interrupting the Director and everyone he’s gathered. Her stance is stiff and formal.

“Agent Alaska reporting for duty, sir.” She holds her posture as a few other Freelancers on the other side of the table glance up at her.

She thought she’d be the first one here, but obviously she’d been beaten. If she wasn’t at attention, she’d go stand with Michigan and her red-and-gold armor. Already gathered as well are Arkansas and Oklahoma, but you always see their green and pink together. There’s also BM and Vermont, and she thinks she even sees Hawaii in the corner.

“Ah, Alaska,” The Director drawls, “Good timing. We were just about to begin. You wouldn’t want to be late for your own mission briefing.”

“Of course not,” Alaska agrees. She can almost feel Hawaii rolling her eyes.

“Very good. In that case, let’s begin.” He pulls up the holographic image of some kind of alien ruin. “You’ll be recovering some artifacts from this crash site. Since they require simultaneous extraction, I’m sending two teams.”

He spins the image and highlights something in one of the lower sections. “Agent Alabama and Agent Hawaii--” He nods and the two of them step forward, “You’ll be recovering the first artifact.”

“No problem,” BM drawls. Hawaii nods in agreement.

“Meanwhile, Alaska.” He moves the hologram to highlight a spot at the top of a spire. Of course she’s always sent on the missions with heights. “You’ll be working with...”

Michigan, she internally begs. Michigan’s never dropped below second place, when she even drops below first. Either Okhlahoma or Arkansas would be fine two, they’re both skilled. Vermont’s pretty sweet and shy, but good in the field, so she’d take her. Or even Tenessse, despite her dramatic flair, is hell with a gatling. As long as it’s not Rhode Island and his stupid crush. Or worse yet...

“Sorry I’m late! There was, um, kind of a problem with the lockers, and--” Oh no.

“Agent Oregon,” The Director nearly sneers. “Do try to arrive on time from now on. I’d nearly changed my mind about assigning you to this mission.” Oh no. “You’re working with Agent Alaska. She’ll catch you up on the details.”

Alaska looks over at her partner. Oregon -- or RG, rather, just like her sister -- has her helmet off and slung lazily in the crook of her arm. It’s as obnoxiously red as the rest of her armor, which honestly makes her look like one of the sim soldiers. And, the worst thing is, RG is beaming at her.

“Oooh, I’ve always wanted to work with you,” RG says. Alaska braces herself. It’s not the first time people have fawned over her. She joined Project Freelancer to get away from her name, but it turns out a Schnee is still a Schnee, no matter what she goes.

“Your armor’s ability is so cool and versatile and I have so many combination ideas,” RG is practically bouncing, “And you give great reports.”

Wait, what?

“Depends on your definition of great,” BM mumbles as she passes, patting RG on the back and nearly knocking her over. Which nearly knocks her into Alaska. She hurriedly shoves RG off of her and dusts herself off.

“Let’s get going,” Alaska simply says and turns on her heels.

While technically the mission was a success, Alaska’s not satisfied with it. Her own performance didn’t so much as nudge her score. No doubt because she was spending most of the mission bickering with her partner. If it hadn’t been for her suit’s enhancements, RG would’ve never made it up the side of the building.

Green flickers in the corner of her vision. “I believe you’re overthinking this, Agent Alaska,” Omicron says.

“I’m not overthinking this,” She snaps, “I’m thinking about this a perfectly reasonable amount. I--”

“Ooh, is that your AI?”

Alaska’s head snaps up as RG approaches her. Alaska closes her locker and glares. Omicron clears his throat in amusement and then flickers away before she can glare. It doesn’t matter, because her eyes catch on RG pulling off her helmet. In the light of the briefing room she didn’t see how RG’S short black hair is tipped with red that can’t be natural, or how she has striking silver eyes that almost look through her. Alaska swallows thickly.

“Yes,” She replies stiffly.

“That’s cool. I’ve got Psi here.” An AI flickers into place next to RG, faintly hazel in color. He waves to Alaska, who frowns.

“Wait, you already have an AI?”

“Yeah, I guess?” RG rubs the back of her neck. “The Director thought I was ready.”

“I thought you just joined the program,” Alaska says through grit teeth, “And you already have an AI? There’s no way you’ve earned that.”

“Whoa, hey,” RG narrows her eyes, “What’s with you? I just wanted to talk to you because I wanted to find someone else who understood. I mean, Michigan’s got... Epsilon, right?”

“Kappa.”

“--Right, and Hawaii and my sister are up soon, but...”

“You think I want to talk to you?” Alaska can see Psi getting nervous, and Omicron activating to try and calm her, but she ignores them. “After your stunt on the mission?”

“Hey, that worked out! We were fine!”

“No thanks to you!” A part of her knows that isn’t entirely true, but she doesn’t want to admit it. “You’ve been trying to aggravate me all day! Ever since you mocked my reports--”

“I wasn’t mocking you,” RG interrupts her, now deadly sincere. “I actually meant what I said? I like your reports.”

Alaska stares. “What?”

“You put more detail into them than anyone else.” RG rocks back on her heels and shrugs. “Yeah, they’re really long, but some of the stuff you include is really useful. Like the other week I read your report on the Chorus mission, and you were the only one who included the exact model of vehicle that Hawaii caught. Sooo I could look it up and calculate the tensile strength on that ribbon-gun she likes, so I could give suggestions for that combo move she uses with BM!”

“The one they use all the time?” Alaska blinks at her. “You came up with that?”

“Yeah.”

“And you figured it out because of my notes?”

“Yeah!”

Nobody’s ever complimented her on that before. Not genuinely. Everyone thinks she’s pretentious and too focused on her rank, but she just wants to be thorough. And here’s this newbie prodigy telling her how good they are. Something bubbles in her chest, but Alaska can’t put a name to it.

“Maybe I’ve misjudged you,” She admits slowly. “Would you... like to spar sometime? I could give you feedback on your form, or something like that.”

The smile slowly spreads across RG’s face. “I’d really like that.”

Anyway, the rest of that is a story for another time. Too bad, I know.

Instead, let me paint you a picture: it’s late afternoon and yet the moon rises high over the walls of the gulch. Alaska goes off on patrol, but so little happens in this box canyon that she’s really just using the excuse to get away from BM and Hawaii being obnoxious and obvious back at Red base.

She goes up along one of the cliff trails that run along the sides of the gulch. This one leads to a nice vantage point of Blue Base, which is a great strategic advantage for no purpose. They’re only play fighting with Rhode and the rest of Blue Team. Really, it’s just a nice spot for some peace and quiet.

Except that RG’s already beaten Alaska there. RG sits at the edge of the overlook with her feet swinging off the edge, her sniper rifle laid neatly beside her.

Alaska hesitates for a moment. RG glances back and notices her, then simply scoots to the side a little bit. Alaska takes the invitation and sits carefully beside RG, her own knees tucked closer to her chest.

“Do you ever wonder why we’re here?” RG asks.

“I was going to ask you why you were out here,” Alaska counters.

“That’s not what I meant!” “What did you mean?”

“I mean, why are we here in this random canyon?”

Alaska frowns behind her helmet. “I thought... random was the point?”

“Mmmm. I guess so.” RG leans back and tilts her head up to the sky. “This place is kind of nice at night.”

“Do you... come out here a lot at night?”

“Sometimes. Sometimes it’s nice to stargaze. Even though I don’t recognize any of the constellations here.”

“I could teach you sometime.”

RG looks over at her. “What?”

“My sister taught me the constellations. Even ones in the far reaches of the galaxy, like here.” Alaska looks up at the sky, purposefully not looking directly at RG. “I could show you, sometime.”

“I’d really like that, Alaska.”

“You can thank me for it later.”

They say later, but they stay until the sun sets. In the darkness, nobody will see if their hands overlap.

#my writing #transrobo #okay a few of these names were canonically taken but like #by some of the rando freelancers with temple so. its fine.#there was a lot more stuff i didnt have time to include but i hope you enjoy anyway #anyway happy birthday!!!

4 notes · View notes