#might go 2 bed and wait for the other povs tomorrow
sprucewoodmpreg · a month ago
Happy midnight
yayyy happy midnight anon ^_^ itsnow double life saturday baby
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slasherparadise · 11 months ago
This is a story I started writing a while back. I hesitated with sharing it on here since it's not finished, but I thought if you guys liked it enough, it might encourage me to finish it lol. It's definitely not my best writing but nonetheless I hope you enjoy it.
'Who would have ever known'
Story description:
You have been away on a trip for the past few months, when you return home to live with your brother Dylan, he informs you that a few of his friends have moved into the house as well. You had no idea that your brother was friends with some of the most infamous serial killers including Michael Myers, Jason Voorhees, Thomas Hewitt (leatherface), Billy Loomis (Ghostface) and Norman Bates. Since there are so many of you living in one house, there will be shared rooms... Who is your slasher roommate going to be?
(Y/N) POV: I cannot wait to be at home and to be able to sleep in my own bed, with some peace and quiet. This trip has been nice but I'm ready to get back to work and see my family again. I just hope Dylan hasn't been trashing our house while I've been away. 
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Chapter 1: The Man
Author POV : As you make your way onto your long flight home, unbeknownst to you your older brother Dylan has already made living arrangements with a few of his friends. Being the caring person he is, he invited them to live with you when they had nowhere else to go. Your flight took just over 4 hours and you got home at one o'clock in the morning, being so late you didn't even bother to say hello to your brother you just went upstairs to go to bed and decided you'd talk to him tomorrow. So you went upstairs to your bedroom and set your bags on the floor, you got dressed into your pajamas, brushed your teeth and got into bed. Everything was just as it should be, that is until you rolled over to see a huge man fast asleep in your bed. From what you could see, he had short dark hair and his face was covered in scars. But at this moment you were so tired that you fell asleep while studying the man that was in your bed. The next morning you woke up to find the strange man was gone and the opposite side of the bed was made, just as it always is because you don't sleep on that side of your king size bed. You just laughed to yourself (Y/N): "I'm losing my mind" getting out of bed you went to the bathroom and brushed your hair then proceeded to go downstairs for breakfast as usual.  When you got to the kitchen you seen your brother sitting at the table with two huge men, you gave him a very confused look (Y/N):" Um good morning...?" All three men turned to look at you (Dylan):" Oh, good morning (y/n). Uh, we've got a few things we have to talk about. These guys and a couple others are going to be staying with us for while" the room was silent for a moment while you were trying to understand what he was saying (Y/N):" Okay, so that man in my bed last night... that wasn't a dream? Your telling me I actually slept next to a stranger?!!" You heard them all giggle at that (Dylan):" yeah, sorry about that. Michael has been staying in your room while you were away. I should've told you sooner" you looked at both of the men sitting at the table with Dylan, they both had masks on, so which one is the man you saw last night? (Y/N):" are one of you Michael?" You asked as one of the men nodded his head, he was wearing a white mask that covered his entire head and most of his neck, along with a blue mechanic jumpsuit. You wondered why he wore the mask, but then you remembered when you were looking at him last night, his face was covered in scars and thought maybe he was insecure of them. You decided  not to ask, not right now at least.
Chapter 2: Meeting your new housemates
After learning that the man you found in your bed last night was Michael, you asked Dylan to introduce you to the rest of the guys as they all started to wake up and come into the kitchen. Dylan started going around the group of all of these huge and rather strange looking men and introducing you to them (Dylan):"You've already met Michael, so we'll start with Thomas" as he gestured to a very tall and muscular man, that you could only assume was Thomas. Thomas was wearing blue jeans and along sleeve button up shirt, as well as a mask that resembled a muzzle. He had wavy dark brown hair that came down to his shoulders and the most beautiful chocolate brown eyes you've ever seen, he looked at you with kind eyes and gave you a gentle wave to say "hello". After that Dylan walked over to another man (Dylan):" Now this is Norman" You seen a small man standing there who was dressed very nice, and had his hair combed to the side. He gave you a wide smile (Norman):"Why hello (y/n), I-I hope we can be g-great friends" you gave him a smile back (Y/N):"So do I Norman, I'm hoping to get along with all of you" Dylan then proceeded to a man wearing a black cloak and a creepy ghost mask (Dylan):"..and this is Billy, although we call him Ghostface" Billy took off his mask to reveal his face, you thought he was actually quite handsome. He had dark brown eyes and shaggy brown hair that draped in his eyes (Ghostface):" Well hi there pretty girl, wanna be my roommate instead of Michael's? *wink*" you gave him and awkward look as you looked at Dylan to continue and introduce the last man to you. He walked over to a very tall and muscular man that was wearing a hockey mask (Dylan):" and last but NOT least there's Jason." Jason gave you a shy wave then looked down at his feet as if he was embarrassed. Since there are so many people living in one house, everyone except Michael has a roommate. But some of the slashers are having conflicts and want to switch rooms with someone else. (Y/N):" well, how about you guys figure out who you want to room with and the odd man out will be my roommate" so they all start switching rooms and getting settled, while their doing this you notice the Ghostface has pushed Thomas out of his room. Michael had already gone to be with Jason so you had room for someone else. You slowly walk up to Thomas, feeling a bit intimidated by him and tapped him on the arm. He looked at you confused for a moment (Y/N):"Hey Thomas, do you want to come with me?"
Author's note: sorry the beginning is so bad lol, I promise it'll get better.
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marvels-bitch-boy · a year ago
Emerald Eyes: Chapter 6
Chapter 6: (Multi POV)
Word count: 3.8k
A/N: I FINALLY FINISHED THIS CHAPTER DEAR GOD! this took me way longer than I planned, it might have a few mistakes but I will go back over it after my race tomorrow, I just wanted you guys to have some Emerald Eyes, before I go outta town for a bit to tour a college, HOPE YOU HAVE A GREAT DAY AND EAT OR DRINK SOMETHING!
Chapter 5 , Chapter 7
(Wanda’s POV) Time Skip 2 months
As Wanda quickly rushes to the quinjet that is waiting on the roof of her safe house, as a group of large -very “hefty”- Russian mobsters yells after her and begins chasing her up the seamlessly never-ending stairs, she uses her powers to push the largest one down and he lands on most of his friends, one gets up quickly and takes out his gun as she continues to run up the stairs, the Russian begins shooting at her but she simply uses her powers yet again to redirect the bullets to the wall behind her. She finally reaches the door to the roof as she hears the mobsters continuing to yell at her and each other in Russian, once she reaches the quinjet they immediately take off and head back to the compound.
As the quinjet lands, Wanda can see her brother running up to the landing pad with who she assumes is a civilian slung over his shoulders as he stops in front of the jet, she quickly makes her way out of the jet and to her brother he envelopes her in a tight hug as he begins berating her with questions “Wanda did you punch any of them in the jaw? Did you find a real man and not a walking toaster to bring home? Oh! Did you meet a mobster who fell in love with you and sacrificed his life for yours like in my friend’s fan fiction? Did you get to drink an entire bottle of vodka? Did you rob a train car?” she laughs at all of his questions and simply responds with “No, to all of them, except I did get you a small gift...” she pulls a gold chain that she swiped from one of the mobsters she knocked unconscious when she went into his mind to gather intel “...here you go, and don’t lose this one” she then turns her head to notice the tall (Y/H/C)-haired boy standing next to her brother -rather awkwardly and averting eye contact “or he could just be nauseous from Pietro carrying him” she thinks to herself- Pietro notices her staring at him and moves to place an arm around his shoulder and bring him into a side hug.
“Wanda…” as soon as Pietro says her name the boy whips his head to look at Pietro with a confused look as his brows furrowed intensely and he immediately turned to look at Wanda and his face softened as he had a look of realization wash over him and his mouth opened as if he was about to say something but nothing came out. “...this is (Y/N)...” suddenly she is hit was a wave of realization, this was the boy she met from the party, the boy who she assumed she’d never see again she shakes off this thought as he brother continues talking “...I’m his new best friend, and he’s working his way up to your spot”
“We’ve actually met before…” (Y/N) speaks up as he holds eye contact with Wanda “...at that very dark, very loud, and very crowded party” He lets out a small laugh before her brother releases him from his grip and turns to his friend “hold on, you two have met before??...” he gives him a look that Wanda assumes is leading to her brother’s protective side but his face just transforms into the biggest smile “...THAT’S AWESOME!!! My two favourite people already like each other!...wait, you two are cool right?”
The boys both turn to Wanda with expecting looks, “yeah, he actually made the party enjoyable, thank you again for keeping me company” the boy just rubs the back of his neck with his hand and smiles at her “it was my pleasure, if anything you made that whole thing a lot better” he seems to laugh again this time it’s a mix both awkward and anxious. Pietro starts talking about how much more fun the compound will be now that she is back, but as he is speaking (Y/N) grabs his phone and excuses himself and says bye to Wanda as he makes his way off the landing pad. Her attention is ripped away from him as a pair of hands gently wrap around her waist and she knows exactly who they belong to and turns towards the bright synthezoid standing with a soft smile as he looks into her eyes “Hello my darling, I missed you...how did the mission go?” she matched his warm and gentle smile with one of her own and gave him a loving kiss “it went well, but I’m much happier now that I’m home, Vis” and with that Pietro groaned as he said by to his sister and the “talking toaster”.
It was roughly 1 AM when Wanda made her way to the library and she was happy to able to talk with her new friend from across the shelf but when she passed his usual spot she stopped as she saw no beanbag, no cup of freshly brewed tea, and no book sitting on the table by the window...in fact, there wasn’t even a table by the window anymore, this confused her because ever since the stranger arrived, there had always been one sitting there waiting to be occupied the reader, but now it was like he was never here at all as if he never existed...
Wanda returned to that spot the next night and yet again, no table, no tea, no book, and no beanbag… the next night, however, the table was back but the beanbag was nowhere to be found, she simply began walking back to her room but thats when she saw him, his back was still turned to her as it always was but instead of going back to the aisle he simple turned right around giving Wanda a clear look at his face for the first time, she finally sees the identity of the SWORD agent that she had befriended, she was surprised to see (Y/N), the boy she met at the party, her brothers new friend, and now not only was he an agent, but he was the SWORD agent that wanda had seemed to grow rather close with, nonetheless she let the faint wisp of a smile creep across her face as she watched him exit the library, she felt so much closer to the boy she met at the party, like she knew a secret part of him that wasn’t seen by most like she knew a more unguarded version of himself, one that Wanda seemed to enjoy very much...
(Y/N’s POV)
After meeting re-meeting Wanda you got a message from Natasha giving you orders to change and appear at the avenger’s conference room. You walked to your room to change into your uniform as Natasha had instructed you to do, while you got ready you looked over your room and saw the “progress” -as Pietro put it-, you had a (Y/F/C) rug on the floor, a nice painting that Natasha had picked out for you hung on the wall above your bed and Bruce had given you a small fern that sat beside your large window, your desk had a picture that Pietro -somehow- messaged Monica asking for any, and of course, she sent him tons, you now had a small box filled with a few pictures of you and Pietro that accompanied the ones of Monica and you, you framed your diplomas and placed them above your desk. You actually for the first time in a long time felt...like you were in a place that could become your home, the people here were kind to you, and you had actually been learning a lot -from Natasha, not Pietro, you would never admit that to him-. Finished getting ready and headed to the conference room Natasha was waiting for you in, as you entered you didn’t have the problem of being trapped in the Russians eyes as you had immediately noticed two figures standing in the room, one of them turned to you with a kind smile you’ve known for years.
Director Maria Rambeau greeted you with a simple “hello” but never letting her smile waiver, the other figure turned around as she made her greeting to you, it was a man you instantly recognized as the Director of SHIELD Nicky Fury “hello recruit, I take it your training has been going well?” you stand at attention as he speaks to you and nod “yes, sir, agent Romanoff has made sure I’m pushed to my limits” Fury eyes him up and looks over at Natasha before turning back to you, his face still unreadable “I’ve taken a look at your file and spoken to Director Rambeau so trust me when I say, ‘she has yet to scratch the surface’...anyway that’s not why we are here, we both came to congratulate you” as he says this Director Rambeau hands you -yes- a manila folder, -these people seem to be keeping that business alive- with the words “Project Inferno” written on it, you narrow your eyes at it trying to make sense of it, you open the folder to find a brand new SWORD ID badge with the word ‘recruit’ switched out for ‘Feild Agent’ wait...does this mean? No, this was all too quick, they wouldn’t have sent you here as a show of good faith for only a few months...you looked up at Director Rambeau who could sense your questions through your puzzled look “no, you won’t be leaving here, we are simply stating that your training is complete...you are welcome to request a transfer to a different SHIELD facility to continue our deal, but the Avengers and SHIELD think you are a perfect fit here, you will be operating from here until you feel you need a change…” her smile never leaving only shifting to one of comfort, its a smile a mother gives her child while seeing them graduate -this woman practically became your mother the moment you met Monica- as she went to give you a hug and whispered in your ear “Congratulations sweetie, you’ve done amazing...I am so proud of you, WE are so proud of you” As soon as you hear her say “WE” you tighten the hug and let a few tears fall from your eyes, you knew instantly who she was talking about, you knew that the moment Monica found out she must have hugged her mom the same way you were right now. You wanted to say so many things, but you didn’t know where to start, you just wanted to thank her for everything so that’s what you did “Thank you, Maria...” you whispered back, she knew that coming from you that was worth 1,000 thank you’s, and she cherished it.
When you both pulled away, Natasha came up to you and gave you another small smile...but this one seemed different...it seemed enchanting, you weren’t getting lost in only her eyes now but rather HER... Fury interrupts the moment when he clears his throat and cuts in “Agent Romanoff will be overseeing and chaperoning you on your first mission, that file has everything you need to know in it, you and two will be leaving in 30 mins via quinjet...good luck” and with that, he walks out of the conference room Maria grabbed your hand gave it a small squeeze before she exited the room too, it was now just you and Natasha...as you looked at her again you could feel your self begin to slip away, you felt like this moment was something you’d only experienced once before...but she wasn’t something you could let yourself become lost in not even for a moment, you snapped your self out of it as you pulled on a faux smile and attempted an excited tone “Shall we get to work then?” she gave you another inviting smile as she motioned for you both to exit and prepare for your first field mission.
(Natasha’s POV)
It was day two of the mission and he already needed her help, the way he called out to her over the comms as he attempted to block the HYDRA agents from entering the server room that she was in gathering all intel on ‘Project Inferno’ and wipe it from all their databases. He had been grazed with a bullet on his hip, that was enough for him to warrant calling out for assistance, she informed the quinjet that was on its way to get the med kit ready for when they were picked up. She finished her task before she made her way to door, it was soon burst open by (Y/N) as he closed them immediately and looked to her, “so change of plans, turns out it wasnt just one bullet, kind of have a small hole in my shoulder...possibly” she gave him the biggest glare as he tried to innocently smile at her while keeping the door closed.
Natasha quickly ripped off a piece of fabric from his uniform and shoved it in the wound that was turning his clothes a bright scarlet red, he yelped in pain but quickly recovered. She handed him the gun that the knocked out HYDRA agent had and got into a position as she counted down to enter the hallway…”one…”she looked over at him “...two...” they both nodded to each other as they raised their legs to kick open the door “...THREE” they said in unison as they began firing off shots at the opposing agents.
Natasha and (Y/N) didn’t talk much while they rode the quinjet home that night, she would check on him to make sure his shoulder wound wasn’t giving him much pain, she offered him one of his jackets that he had placed in the quinjet before they entered the HYDRA base, he gave her a small smile as she helped him slip it on and thanked her, he leaned his head back and she could tell that he what he was thinking about, she didn’t need to have any powers to know the look on his face as he huffed out of infuriation with himself, she decided to attempt to comfort him like Clint or Steve would do for her whenever a mission didn’t end as planned.
She sat next to him and took one of his hands in her own, this seemed to pull him out of his head as he looked down at her hand that was holding his, his gaze went up to meet her eyes as she simply said to him “you did all you could, and we completed the mission, that’s what matters, don’t fill your head with what you didn’t do” as she said this his expression turned into what she could only assume was guilt before he flashed on a smile that -for the first time around her- didn’t reach his eyes. She could feel him slowly pull his hand from hers, she stopped him by gently running her thumb over his knuckles, he flashed his faux smile with guilt-ridden eyes as he thanked her and leaned back into his seat again this time closing his eyes as his body began to ache and scream at him to rest, she, however, was too preoccupied with wondering what he could be feeling guilty about, what could he possibly be tormenting himself about from this mission? “It was his first mission, there were bound to be mistakes, he didn’t prepare for that, that’s all” is the only answer that floated around in her head.
The quinjet landed down at the Avengers compound at 1 AM, she knew that the boy next to her would only want to rest after such a hectic first mission but she also knew that if he didn’t go to Dr Cho then the risks from his shoulder wound would rise. Her attention was pulled back to the boy sitting next to her as he squeezed her hand in his sleep, she quickly pulled her hand away and stood up, she chastised herself for coddling the young agent after such a mess of a first mission, she held her face in her hands as she groaned to herself and saw the door of the jet open. She slapped the ‘agents’ knee to wake him up, and it did indeed, she may have hit a bruise or not known her own strength because he woke up with a loud yelp in pain and used his good arm to hold his leg as he cursed -yeah, he definitely isn’t getting out of a visit with Cho anytime soon- the first person to enter the jet is of course Pietro who had been waiting at the landing pad for the past hour awaiting his friends return, he went to his friends side in seconds and was helping him up and off the jet, she simply waited to hear Steve’s “You’ll see what makes him so special on his own time,-...give him a break…-he reminds me of myself sometimes” spiel but it never came, instead he looked at her with relief instead of his usual words about the “kid” he plainly said “thank you for looking out for him, Nat” and nodded to her before walking back into the compound. She stood there for a moment before grabbing her own bag and noticing (Y/N’s) still right next to hers, she weighed her options for a moment before ultimately grabbing his and lugging it into the compound with her. When she drops her own bag in her apartment, she asks Friday for an update on his condition “Agent Y/L/N is currently being cleaned up by Dr Cho’s staff and will be entering The Regeneration Cradle shortly, he is expected to be fully recovered in one hour” she thanks Friday as she sets his bag down on her couch and goes to clean up, she sits on her couch with a bowl of instant ramen she stole from Clints side of the pantry and played “The Princess Bride” to kill time as she waited for (Y/N) to be finished in The Regeneration Cradle.
Around 2 hours had passed before Natasha was woken up by a call from Pietro, he sounded confused as he explained what was happening to (Y/N) “umm...so Cho thinks he has a fever but he kept insisting that it’s normal for him...which made her more concerned, so she like...um I think she gave him some weird meds...cuz he just started getting really cold, like...ice cold, but like he keeps sneezing and Steve just forced everyone out of the room except him and Cho...and they’ve been talking for like half an hour so far” she got up from the couch and grabbed a hoodie before making her way down the hallway to the infirmary.
When she arrived she was greeted by Pietro who was eating a whole pizza while sitting in the waiting room, Pietro just re told her everything from their phonecall, Steve soon walked out into the waiting room and didn’t even wait for their questions.
“where is Y/N’s mission bag?”
Pietro shrugged as he wipped pizza sauce from his face “I checked the jet after he asked me for it when I dropped him here, but it wasn’t there”
Steve looked to her and raised his brow, she sighed “I grabbed it after Pietro took him off the jet, I was going to drop it at his room once he was recovered”
Steve sighed too and contemplated for a second “okay, well his....” he looked at the two of them and then back at (Y/N) who was sneezing and almost fell off the bed he was in “...his allergy medication is in it, he seems to be allergic to one of the meds Helen gave him…”
He looked at her expectantly “could please go and grab his bag natasha?” she nodded and made her way out to the hallway and to her room, she felt uneasy about what Steve said “allergy medication” as far as she knew (Y/N) didn’t have any allergies, she never even saw him cough or sneeze until now...which was odd in itself.
She handed Steve the bag and he walked back to where (Y/N) was currently drinking a cup of tea, as she looked at the agent she realized she had never seen him look so weak, even when he fell asleep on the ride back to the compound he still looked so full of strength, after training he never showed that he was tired, but now he was covered with blankets and had the same hoodie that she helped him put on just a few hours ago, his smile to Steve never wavered but the guilt was still ever-present in his eyes.
It took only 30 mins for (Y/N) to be given the all clear by Dr Cho, Natasha had sent Pietro to his apartment to get some rest after (Y/N) took his medication. She waited for him outside of the infirmary while Steve had a second talk with him in private, when he entered the hallway he looked like he was deep in thought before she put a hand on his back “let me walk you to your room, wouldn’t want you passing out in the hallway”
“Thanks, Natasha...I’m sorry about the mission...and about all of this, you didn’t have to wait for me” he bit his lip as he looked down and averted her gaze as they began walking down the hall, she cocked and eyebrow at him “why do you call me that?”
“What?...that’s your name right?”
“It is, but my friends usually call me Nat, why don’t you?”
This made him stop walking and a small smile appeared on his lips, and his eyes narrowed “is this-is this your way of saying we’re friends?”
“I guess it is...since we’re friends, is there anything that your friends call you?” she asked with playful look
He licked his lips and sigh before running a hand over his face “yeah, there is-but you can’t use it around anyone else! Its only between us okay?”
She nodded “only us, I promise” she didn’t even notice the smile that had emerged on her lips as she said this
“Oh god…” he muttered under his breath “...Ignes...or most just say Igg, it was from the first week of training…”
Her eyes gave him a soft look as she tested out this new name “Ignes, Igg...I-gg…” a thought popped into her head and her smile grew wider “...Iggy!!” as soon as she said this his eyes went wide as he screamed “NONONONOO”
She started laughing hysterically and patted him on the back lightly “Its okay Iggy, its only between us...I promise”
Tag list:
@littlewinchester15 @ethanwoods1 @nektotersh
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figonas · a year ago
As Warm As The Sun-Part 1
“When he wakes there is crisp sunlight streaming through his chambers, yellow as a daffodil and nearly as warm as Jude felt in his arms. In limbo between awake and asleep Cardan thinks he might have dreamt that part of the evening as well”
Summary: Takes place during The Wicked King pretty much right before the Queen of Mirth scene and Chapter 15. This is just a soft, fluffy response to the prompt “hug me I command it”.
Words: 1623
Rating: GA
Links: Part 2-Jude POV | AO3
A/N: Tumblr user @jurdanhell brought this prompt up to me and our initial discussion that it didn’t really fit Cardan morphed into “wait yes this is exactly Cardan behavior”. This is my first work on AO3 so kudos would be greatly appreciated, if it gets enough love I might re-write the scene from Jude’s perspective!
Revels all tended to blend together, an endless stream of music and alcohol that somehow left Cardan feeling as desperately alone as always even when in a room bursting with folk of all shapes and sizes. This particular revel was different, if only because Jude was still hovering around him long after she would have normally retreated to her chambers or the Court of Shadows. He could feel her eyes on him, as heavy as the weight of his crown as she stared daggers at him from her position to the side of his throne.
Ordering Jude to do anything would be ordering a knife thrust into his own back, High King or no. So Cardan merely asked Jude to attend the revel in its entirety, but he did so in front of the Living Council, several members of the Low Courts, and Locke who rose to challenge and prod Jude without needing to be asked. There was no way for her to refuse that wouldn’t be seen as backing down from his challenge, so through gritted teeth, Jude graciously accepted his invitation. He didn’t know why he had asked her, perhaps he simply wanted to annoy her in a way that would require little effort from him, or perhaps he wanted to know how she would retaliate. A small part of him whispered that he just wanted her company but he made sure to drown that part of him with plenty of wine earlier in the night. Too much wine though Cardan is loath to admit it, and now as the night winds down he’s not entirely sure he can make it back to his rooms on his own. It wouldn’t be the first time one of his guards has dragged their High King to bed and dropped him on his royal ass but Cardan dislikes the idea all the same. Moving to stand he lurches too far forward and nearly falls off the raised dais before Jude’s hand closes on the back of his cloak pulling him backward where he crashes into her solid presence. “As much as it would amuse me to watch you fall after you made me stand here all night for no reason, I’m too tired to pick you up off the floor,” Jude hisses in his ear, she throws one of his arms across her shoulders as her other arm snakes around his waist. “Dearest Jude, are you trying to take me to bed?” Cardan tries his best to wiggle his eyebrows at her but he’s too focused on his feet as they descend the dais steps and begin the long trek to his rooms. “Don’t push your luck or I’ll leave you to sleep on the floor in the middle of the burgh”. He laughs despite her threat and out of the corner of his eye he sees a small smile on Jude’s lips.
Cardan’s inebriated mind is not as trained at quashing his feelings for Jude as his sober mind is. As they make their way through the palace halls he has the sudden, sickening thought that he likes this, being embraced by Jude Duarte even if it’s only to help him to his rooms. She seems to have forgotten she’s repulsed by him, letting him lean on her as much as he needs. Cardan decides that he would get mindlessly drunk every night if it meant Jude would hold him this way but, perhaps mercifully, they make it to his rooms before he can voice this out loud. The moment she releases him he misses her warmth, her feeling of life and strength, of mortality. Before he knows what he’s saying he opens his mouth to speak. “Embrace me again,” he says, drunk and foolish, he can see the shock on her face despite her desperate attempt to hide it, but even Jude master of power and control, cannot stop the flush rising across her cheeks. Is it desire? Anger? Embarrassment? Cardan doesn’t care, he likes this Jude best; off her guard, almost susceptible to his charms but not quite, she is Jude Duarte after all. She recovers quickly, her expression cooling into something like boredom. “Go to bed Cardan” she points at the monstrously empty bed and he imagines it will be just as cold and lonely as he feels now. “But I am your king, Jude I command it,” he says with what he hopes is a playful smile, but is more than likely a fool’s grin. “So I say again, embrace me and then I will concede and go to bed”. Jude opens her mouth to speak but quickly shuts it with an audible snap of teeth.
She’s at war with herself he realizes suddenly, he can nearly see the thoughts racing in her head. He expects her to push back and fight with him, or to leave him where he stands not caring if he makes it to bed or collapses on the floor right here. Impossibly she does neither, instead, she reaches for him and wraps her arms around his midsection, her cheek resting on his shoulder. Cardan is frozen for what feels like an eternity but is only a handful of seconds as her warmth seeps into his very bones. He wraps his arms around her, returning the embrace before she changes her mind. “I’m only doing this because I’m too tired to fight with you about going to bed,” Jude mumbles softly, Cardan barely hears her above his pounding heart, but he can feel her words from where she’s pressed against his chest. He wants to tighten his grip on her to ensure himself this is real. He wants to bury his face in the crook of her neck and inhale the scent that haunts his dreams; her scent, so uniquely human, so wholly Jude. Through sheer force of will, he stops himself from indulging in either of these fantasies that would most likely only shatter this tender moment or result in him getting stabbed, he is equally disappointed at the thought of either possibility.
Jude seems to forget, if only for a moment, that it’s Cardan’s arms around her, his shoulder her cheek rests on, his neck that she tickles with her soft exhales. She relaxes just a little in a way he didn’t know she could, her palms flattening against his back, the ever-present tension leached slightly from her shoulders. He indulges in the impulse of stroking her lower back with his thumbs, he’s emboldened to tighten his grip on her just a fraction when Jude doesn’t react to the small movement. They stand in silence for several moments, Cardan’s heart racing at a worrying speed. Suddenly, Jude inhales deeply which turns into a wide yawn and she steps back rubbing the heel of her hand across one eye. “Alright, Your Majesty I indulged your wishes,” she’s interrupted by another, smaller yawn which she covers with the back of her hand. Cardan’s hands are still resting lightly on Jude’s waist, she doesn’t move from his touch. “Now to bed with you so I can get in my own. One of us has to be alert enough to run the kingdom,” she points in the direction of his bed and Cardan drops his hands. He is again shocked by how cold his room feels without her pressed against him. He quashes the urge to touch her again, he knows she will not indulge him a second time. When he turns he sways slightly, Jude rolls her eyes and places her hand on the small of his back guiding him to bed. “Careful with your orders Jude or I will tell everyone that you were kind to me,” he laughs to himself though it is not at all funny. “Though I don’t think anyone would believe me”. “You won’t remember this tomorrow anyway,” they reach the bedside where she gives him a gentle shove and he drops unceremoniously onto his too-large bed. The motion sets his head swimming. He steals one last, longing look at Jude before closing his eyes; her cheeks flushed, eyes tired, impenetrable walls lowered the tiniest bit. Cardan tucks the image away to think of when she’s gone and he’s left alone in the sea of cold blankets. “Oh Jude, loveliest of afflictions, I will remember this night for years to come,” he hears her scoff as she steps away from the bed. “We’ll see about that tomorrow,” she sounds amused as she speaks and if Cardan’s head wasn’t spinning so badly he would peel his eyes open just to see one of Jude’s rare smiles. He hears her footsteps retreating toward the door where she stops, he’s nearly overtaken with sleep when he hears her voice call softly back to him. “Goodnight Cardan”. She’s gone before he can respond and Cardan succumbs to sleep only moments later.
She’s there in his dreams as she is most nights. Cardan tries to speak to dream Jude, but the only word he can say is her name; Jude, Jude, Jude, Jude, Jude. Over and over again, he calls her name like a curse, a prayer, the last desperate words of a dying man, a humble supplicant whispering the name of an honored deity. When he wakes there is crisp sunlight streaming through his chambers, yellow as a daffodil and nearly as warm as Jude felt in his arms. In limbo between awake and asleep Cardan thinks he might have dreamt that part of the evening as well, but as he shifts under the sheets her scent wafts from the fabric of his shirt into his nostrils. He clutches the fabric tightly, inhaling deeply he smiles to himself before drifting off again to a peaceful, dreamless sleep.
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pisss-offf-ghostt · a year ago
Halcyon- Part 3
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Pairing- Bucky Barnes x F! Reader
Warnings- mentions of past trauma, kind of, and physical pain, but nothing harsh
Words- 2249
Summary- Bucky and Sam are working together with S.H.I.E.L.D. to help make the world a better place. One night they are working to stop a human trafficking ring and they discover a woman with some abilities and a history they have to uncover together.
Note- The events of this story happen post Endgame. POV of story will switch between Bucky and reader and is noted at the start of each chapter. This will be at least a 20 part series.
A/N- We get to learn a little more about Y/N this chapter and there’s a little something at the end of the chapter. I’m excited to share this with all of you and I truly hope you all like it. Feedback is much appreciated and if you see anything I should add for my warnings, etc. please don’t hesitate to tell me.
A huge thank you to @oloreaa for being my beta and inspiration for all of this. You are a goddess!!
❤️ Let me know if you’d like to be added to the tag list. ❤️
Part 2      Part 4
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Part 3- Reader (Y/N) POV
Exhausted didn’t begin to encompass your current state. You had only been conscious for less than two hours, yet you felt as though you had been awake for five days. Your entire body ached from the thaw out of cryo, which you had come to expect each time you were brought back from a frozen state. The tingling of your fingers and toes, and subsequent throbbing pain as your body slowly regained feeling and control was never comfortable. Then again, from the little you could recall, your life hadn’t exactly been filled with pleasantries.
As if your physical state wasn’t enough, your current mental capacity was even more disastrous. Trying to figure out where you were, much less when you were, was no simple task. This time, however, you did have the comfort of not waking up to a Hydra handler. Although you still had no idea what S.H.I.E.L.D. was or who these men were that took you in, you trusted your gut that they were good people, that they would help you. And maybe, somewhere in the distant future, they could help you piece your life back together.
Your ride on the jet to their headquarters was quick, but you relished the warmth and silence of it while it lasted. Once the aircraft landed, the back of the jet opened into a ramp and revealed a large air hangar that was bustling with activity. You watched as people tended to various aircraft, carried crates, worked on engines, or talked amongst themselves. 
Sam caught your attention at the bottom of the ramp, guided you through the busy building and into a long hallway. As you turned a corner to enter the corridor, you lost sight of Sergeant Barnes and Dr. Banner, but felt relief wash over you to be away from such a large number of people. 
Sam stopped at the end of the empty, gray colored hall, then turned towards his right, facing a glowing monitor.
“FRIDAY, this is Y/F/N Y/L/N. She’s going to be staying with us, but I need you to keep an eye on her alright?” Sam voiced to some unseen person on the other side of the digital panel.
“You got it, Sam,” a lady with an Irish accent sounded from the speaker. “May I get her readings to assist in your surveillance?”
Sam rolled his eyes before he turned to you and flicked his head, signaling you to step closer. “This is FRIDAY, she’s A.I. and keeps track of everybody and everything. For now, we need to keep an eye on you for safety purposes. At least until we get a better understanding of what you are. No hard feelings,” Sam explained. “If you can just stand here facing this monitor for a moment and say hi, then we can be on our way.”
Uncertain of what sorcery Sam was talking about, you stepped forward and faced the panel before you spoke to it. “Hello. . . FRIDAY,” you greeted.
“Hello Ms. L/N and welcome. Should you need any assistance during your stay here, just call for me and I’ll gladly help you,” the feminine voice offered.
“Thanks, FRIDAY,” Sam said absently into the air. “Okay, let’s get you to a room. If you're hungry, I’ll have someone come by with some food,” he explained further as you followed him through a door and into what looked like a business office. 
Given that it was sometime in the pre-dawn hours, you were surprised to find yet more people milling about. Sam kept a steady pace and ignored the people in business attire as he strode past the cubicles and offices. He led you through another door out of the office space and into an enclosed, glass walkway that was at least 50 feet off the ground. At the other end of the glass tunnel was a medical facility where you were met with the smiling face of a dark haired woman.
“Hi, Sam,” she greeted before she turned her dark brown eyes to you. “You must be Y/N. I’m Dr. Helen Cho. It’s a pleasure meeting you,” she spoke as she offered her hand to you. You shook it softly while offering a small smile. “You’re probably exhausted. I have a room ready for you,” the woman sympathized as she gestured for you to follow her. 
She walked past a surgical suite, then turned towards an open door on the left and led you inside. The room was simple, but adequate. It held a twin bed that was pushed against the wall on the right. A window took up most of the wall on the far side of the room. There was a small desk against the wall on the left side of the room adjacent to a door that opened into a bathroom with a shower. Although sterile and almost completely white, you felt comfortably at home. 
“There’s some toiletries in the bathroom for you. If you need anything else, just let FRIDAY know,” Dr. Cho assured you. “For now, try to get some rest and we will get to work tomorrow.” 
With that, the pair closed the door and left you on your own.
You shuffled over towards your bed and sat down right as a gentle knock sounded at your door.
“Come in,” you croaked while you remained seated.
You looked towards the entryway to see Sergeant Barnes peak around the door before entering the room. Under the bright lights, you could now see his features clearly. He was as intimidating in the light as he was under the darkness, even without a gun pointed at you. His face seemed to be set in a persistent scowl with furrowed brows and a tensely set jaw. He had light stubble that framed his face. His full lips pouted slightly, even when he was at rest. But it was his eyes that were most captivating as they were the most brilliant, piercing blue you had ever seen. In spite of their beauty, you could see darkness shrouded behind them.
“Sam thought you might be hungry and asked me to grab you something to eat. It’s a turkey sandwich,” he told you as he held up the sandwich, then placed it on the desk. “I, uh, also grabbed some scrubs that might fit you a little better,” he offered as he placed those on the desk as well. 
“Thank you, Sergeant Barnes,” you nodded. “That’s very kind of you.”
“Bucky,” he corrected.
“What?” you countered as you raised your eyebrows.
“My name. I go by Bucky,” he clarified.
“Thank you, Bucky,” you repeated with a smile.
Looking clearly uneasy of what to do or say next, Bucky excused himself, “Alright, I’m going to go. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
At a loss for words, you simply nodded to him as he walked out the door. You stood up from the bed once the door clicked shut and lumbered to the desk to unwrap your sandwich and eat a few bites. 
Once full, you set the remainder of the sandwich back on the desk then picked up the scrubs and changed your pants. With the better fitting bottoms, you would now be able to move around without one hand on the waist band to stop them from falling off. You opted to keep the hoodie sweatshirt from the jet on as it was quite comfortable and warm. 
Ready to lay down and sleep, you ambled around the room in search for a light switch. Closer to the door, you noted for the first time there was no door handle on your side. Feeling a tinge of fear at the familiarity of being held captive, you breathed deeply and let the thought go as you sat back on the bed. As a last effort before laying down, you spoke to the air in hopeful anticipation “FRIDAY?”
“Yes, Ms. L/N? How can I assist you?” the woman's voice sounded through a small panel by the door.
“How do I turn off the lights in here?” You asked.
“I can do that, if you just tell me when,” she informed you.
With that, you scooted yourself up the bed a bit and laid your head down on the pillow. 
“FRIDAY, I’m ready for the lights now,” you spoke and a second later the lights went off, leaving you in almost complete darkness. 
Sunlight flooded into your room through the large window and by the looks of it, you had slept through most of the morning. You sat up in your bed feeling much more rested but still utterly confused. One thing you were sure of was that you were truly hungry now. You glanced at the leftover turkey sandwich from the night before, but it looked quite soggy from sitting out overnight.
Stifling a yawn, you asked, “FRIDAY, is there any way I can get something for breakfast please?”
“Good morning Ms. L/N. Yes, I’d be happy to inform the others you’d like something to eat. Is there anything in particular you would like to request?” FRIDAY asked you.
“Umm, some wheat toast with butter. And a coffee. Large. I have a feeling today is going to be a long one,” you mumbled the last bit to yourself.
While waiting for your food, you took the opportunity to brush your teeth and wash your face with the toiletries you found in the bathroom. A few minutes after you were done, there was a heavy knock on your door. Before you could even voice approval to enter, the door opened to reveal Dr. Cho.
“Good morning Y/N. How are you feeling today?” she questioned you as you looked past her to see Bucky leaning against the door frame. 
“Better, just. . . hungry,” you responded in earnest.
“Yes, I saw FRIDAY placed an order for some food for you, but if it’s ok, I’d like to hold off on that until after we run some tests, since you’re basically fasted right now which will give better baseline results for blood work” she said as she tapped something on a flat, square device she held in her hands. “If you’ll come with me to one of the exam rooms, we can start right away.”
“Okay,” you agreed, trying to ignore the grumbling in your stomach. You stood up and followed them as they led you down the hall to another room with an exam table and other medical supplies lining the cabinets. 
Once you sat down, Dr. Cho wasted no time and began a full examination, which included blood draws, observations, measurements, and more. She asked a few questions about your medical history, most of which you were unable to answer. Then after she finished examining your eyes, Dr. Cho asked Bucky to exit the room so that you could undress and she could complete the exam. Without a word, he left and closed the door behind him. After undressing, you watched as Dr. Cho looked you over and then approached your back. 
She stalled there and asked, “Do you remember how you got any of these?”
“Got what?” you questioned.
“These scars on your back,” she answered as she seemed to mark each one on her chart and took measurements of them. 
“No,” you whispered, while she tapped on her apparatus.
“That’s okay. Go ahead and get dressed, we’re all done in here. Bruce is waiting for us in the conference room where we will ask you some questions,” she explained. You nodded as you grabbed your clothes and dressed yourself. 
Once fully clothed, Dr. Cho opened the door to the hallway where Bucky leaned against the wall with his arms crossed. He looked up and gave a small nod to the doctor as she walked past him. You followed closely behind her, while Bucky took up the rear and followed you like an ominous shadow.
After walking some distance to another building, you entered the conference room. There you spotted Dr. Banner sitting in what must have been a custom chair to accommodate his size. The room was lined with dark colored wooden shelves that were filled with books and some gadgets you weren’t able to identify. At the center of the space was a large, rectangular table that was surrounded by sleek, black chairs. Dr. Cho gestured for you to take a seat at the end of the table where you noticed there was a plate of buttered toast, a large cup of coffee, and packets of cream and sugar. 
You sat down and took a bite of your food while the others situated themselves around the room. Dr. Banner and Dr. Cho sat at the other end of the table, opposite of each other. Bucky remained standing against the wall to the left of your chair. 
“Okay, Y/N. I’ve been filled in a little more on your situation since we met last night and it seems you aren’t terribly sure of your past. Dr. Cho and I would like to ask some questions and see what we can determine about you, your abilities, and your ties to Hydra,” Bruce explained. 
“Okay,” you answered before taking a sip of your coffee.
“Let’s start simple,” Bruce began. “What is your full name?”
“My name is Y/F/N Y/M/N Y/L/N,” you spoke clearly. 
“Where and when were you born?” Bruce continued.
“I was born in San Francisco, California on May 2, 1920.”
Tags- @justanotherblonde23 @just-me-and-my-obsessions00 @vicmc624 @spacial-universe @chasingdreamer @purplekitten30 @vishousmate @foxlace @fangirl-swagg​ @themaddies-obx @breadqueen95 @shy-panda02 @austynparksandpizza
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smaidjor · 12 months ago
i know they're losing (Chapter 1)
hi mothers and fuckers of the jury, this fic is a hot mess but so am I, please appreciate it. Also, obligatory disclaimer this is about the characters not the people, all that important stuff.
Some important notes:
1. You will probably hate Scott just a little at points. He has chronic dumb bitch syndrome and there's a whole lot of bullshit going on in his life that you don't see in this fic because it's not his pov. That being said, he's still a bit of a jerk.
2. This has a lot of lord of the rings lore. A LOT. You may be kinda confused if you're not a lord of the rings fan. It's fine, Jimmy's confused too, and all of it will be explained at some point.
3. The chapter titles are from the Last Goodbye from the Hobbit films. The general title is from I Bet on Losing Dogs by Mitski.
4. General content warnings: there is a little blood, and a little violence, and a lot of mentioned death and morbid jokes. If you don't do well with themes involving death this fic is probably not for you. There is also possibly going to be referenced emotional abuse and generally unhealthy ways to raise children, though that will be talked about much further down the line. I will also put specific cws at the start of each chapter, don't worry!
5. The alternate title for this was '10k words of flower husbands being sad'. You have been warned.
Title: i know they're losing
Chapter Title: under clouds, beneath the stars
Current Total Wordcount: 3740
Content Warning: referenced/past character death, very frank discussion of death.
Scott whirls to face him, robes spinning behind him. “I’m fading, alright? I’m dying, now leave me alone!”
Jimmy feels like he’s been smacked in the face, the words hitting him with all the force of a well-thrown trident. Dying? “You- what- but elves don’t die, right?”
“We do. From poison, from swords, from arrows through the throat-” Jimmy’s hands fly to the scar on his neck, the one that matches Scott’s own- “from grief.”
AO3 Link
Actual fic under the cut
Scott’s hands are cold. That’s the first sign, the chill that’s uncharacteristic of an elf.
Scott’s chest hurts. That’s the second sign, the bone-deep ache he can’t seem to quell.
Scott is weaker than normal, and that’s the third sign, the one that confirms what’s happening beyond a shadow of a doubt. He’s fading, Scott thinks as he leans against a wall, trying to stop his head from spinning. He can’t say he’s surprised, not after all he’s been through; in fact, he’s more astonished it took so long to start.
In another world, it happens like this:
Scott’s hands are cold, and Shubble notices as he shows her around the nether. It’s worrying, a bit, how icy his skin is even in the boiling dimension, but Scott’s empire has always been cold, hasn’t it?
Katherine notices how long it’s been since Scott visited her, one of his few allies, and she worries, a bit. But Scott has always been distant, hasn’t he?
No one notices or worries enough to go check on him, and Scott fades away to nothing, cold and alone in his icy empire.
What actually happens is this:
Katherine has gotten word of the demon that haunts the server, and amongst all her worry, one of her thoughts is ‘has anyone checked on Scott?’. The answer is no, and next time she has a free day, she sets out for Rivendell. It’s not a long trip, not with elytra, anyways, and soon she’s at the doors to his keep.
“I need to see Lord Smajor,” she tells the guards.
“He’s not taking visitors right now.” is the response she gets.
“It’s a vital matter to the safety of both our kingdoms.”
They let her in.
Katherine spends far too long looking around the elegantly decorated downstairs and storage area before she realizes he must be up the spiral staircase in the corner of the room. She’s never been upstairs in Scott’s house before, which makes her a little nervous, but… this is an urgent matter, so she presses on into what turns out to be a very pretty bedroom. Decorated with bookshelves aplenty and gorgeous lanterns, it practically screams Scott.
The man (elf?) himself is harder to spot. At first, Katherine’s worried he isn’t there at all, but eventually she realizes that he’s still in bed despite the fact that it’s a quarter to one, only his pale face sticking out from under the covers.
“Scott?” She asks, cautious. “Lord Smajor?”
He blinks at her tiredly. “Hi, Katherine.”
“I came to talk to you about some empires stuff, but, I mean, if this is a bad time, I can come back later…?”
“No, no, stay.” He waves at the sole chair in the room, which is near-enough to the bed. “I can muster the energy for a meeting, just don’t ask me to get up.”
Katherine takes the seat hesitantly. “I came to talk about the corruption on the server, but- are you okay? Are you sick?”
Scott laughs, a little bitter. “In a way, yes.”
“What do you mean?”
“Take my hand.”
She obeys, confused, and finds that Scott’s hands are like ice despite the warmth of the room.
“Elves don’t get sick like mortals do,” Scott says. “Nor do we die of old age. But we get...heartsickness, you might call it. We call it fading in our tongue- the cold hands are a symptom of that. Our souls are fragile, and the grief of the mortal plane can be overwhelming. If an elf is too struck by it, they fade away and die.”
She gasps a little.
“It usually happens to old elves, world-weary,” Scott continues. “Those who are tired of existence. But any elf who has experienced enough grief is at risk.”
It takes Katherine a moment to process everything, and once she does, she stares at him in horror. “You’re- fading? But doesn’t it usually happen to old elves? Wait, are you old?”
“I’m fifty-five.”
“Is that old?”
That gets a laugh out of him. “Fifty is the elven equivalent of eighteen for humans, the age of maturity.”
“Oh.” She struggles for words for a moment, settling on “How can you be so calm if you’re dying?”
“I’m tired, Katherine. The world tore me away from the people I loved, and..I’m tired of fighting it.”
Try as she might, there’s nothing she can say to that. “Is there a way to reverse fading- to fix it?”
Something pained and raw flashes through his eyes. “Technically, yes. If an elf recovers enough emotionally, it’s reversible. But whatever caused them to fade the first time can- and often does- cause it again.”
Katherine nods seriously, absorbing the information. “We’ll just have to reverse it, then.”
“That’s sweet, Katherine, but I’m dying.”
“No,” she tells him firmly. “You’re not going to die. Now come on, you can show me your empire while I fill you in on what’s happening on the rest of the continent.”
Scott stares at her for a long moment, but eventually he takes her outstretched hand. “Alright.” His hand is frozen cold in hers. “We can try.”
Katherine lets him lead her around Rivendell, pointing out the sights. He’s done an impressive job decorating, like her, and an even more impressive job at uniting the elves and building an empire from the ground up. The people of Rivendell are weary and battle-scarred, for the most part, elves who have seen too much, but the children are bright and happy, and the cyan and gold banners wave proudly in the wind.
As they walk, she also tells Scott about the demon, Xornoth. “The demon’s already visited a lot of people, I think. Gem and Shubble for sure, and Fwhip and Sausage. That’s not even mentioning the corruption that’s been spreading.”
Scott nods. “There’s corruption in Rivendell too. Likely Xornoth’s work. And given that Jimmy still has Vilya- well, I haven’t been able to do much.”
“A ring of power. My inheritance from the Noldor.”
“Why does Jimmy have it?”
He doesn’t answer that one.
Katherine leaves feeling unsettled, with more questions than answers. She has new resolve, though, and a new goal: keep Scott from fading. He’s a good friend, though they don’t know each other that well yet, but more than that, he’s a powerful ally. And Katherine can’t afford to lose allies. So while they’re both rulers and busy in their own right, she promises to visit and drag him outside at least once a week.
“I’ll hold you to that,” Scott jokes, but his laugh is weak.
Katherine vows to hold herself to it.
The plan works for three entire weeks before Katherine has a week that’s so busy there’s no way she can find the time for a trip to Rivendell. Worse than that, because Scott is so isolated, he has almost no other friends, and many of Katherine’s allies are busy too. She’s a little short of options, to be honest, which is how she finds herself on Jimmy Solidarity’s doorstep that Sunday afternoon.
“Hello?” Jimmy asks as the door swings open. Katherine can see why Lizzie calls him the sweet swamp boy- his confused head tilt is frankly adorable.
“Hi! I know we don’t talk much, but I could use a favor,” she says.
“What can I do for you?”
“I need you to visit Scott.”
Jimmy looks beyond startled. “What- I mean, he doesn’t even like me! I couldn’t possibly.”
“Please?” She wheedles. “I promised him a visitor every week, but I have meetings all week this time.”
He shakes his head, hesitantly at first and then stronger. “No, Katherine. He’d just throw me right out again. I’m his enemy, for goodness sake!”
“If he hates you so much, why do you have his ring?”
Katherine knows she’s won, watching emotions flit across his face too quickly to catch. Grief is what he settles on, and she feels a little bit bad for the ring comment when his voice comes out wobbly.
“I guess I should return that, huh? Alright, I’ll go.”
“Sorry,” she says.
Jimmy brushes it off, saying there’s no need to worry, but he fiddles with the ring on his finger all the more. It’s on his left ring finger, Katherine notes. She wonders if that truly means what it implies.
“I’ll visit him tomorrow,” Jimmy says.
“I’ll hold you to that!”
Jimmy isn’t sure why he agreed to this at all, to be honest. Scott may have given him this ring in another world, another lifetime, but that doesn’t mean Scott doesn’t hate him in this one. What other explanation is there for how all his gifts have been rejected, how cold the elf is? Jimmy would be surprised that Scott’s never tried to take his ring back if it wasn’t for how thoroughly Scott avoids him nowadays. Getting the ring back would require talking to Jimmy, something Scott has made it very clear that he doesn’t want to do. Jimmy doesn’t have another use for it, and try as he might to forget flower fields and warm hands in his, he can’t bear to throw it away. So it’s remained on his hand all this time, a painful reminder of someone who used to love him.
Jimmy tries to avoid looking at it as much as possible, every glimpse bringing back the memory of Scott gently sliding it onto his hand, a faint blush dusting his cheeks and a smile on his lips. Even the faint shimmers in the blue gem remind him of how the starlight seemed to get caught in Scott’s hair when they were out at night. The ring had been one of their most valuable possessions on 3rd Life, the rare silver band and elegant forging more than proof of that. Now, though, the ring has to be one of the least valuable things Jimmy owns; on 3rd Life, they were humble folk in little hobbit holes, their most expensive possessions being their diamond armor and swords, but here, they’re kings and lords. Scott probably has a thousand treasures more valuable in his elven empire, so Jimmy’s not sure why he’s bothering to trek all the way across the world just to return this one.
Then again, it’s not really about the ring, and never has been. It’s about the way starlight used to shine in Scott’s eyes when he smiled, his rare, soft grin that was reserved just for Jimmy, how he gave Jimmy the most valuable thing either of them owned. It’s closure, in a way, giving it back. He won’t have any debt to Scott once this ring is returned, and they can both move on like Scott so clearly wants to.
Shaking off those thoughts, Jimmy slows to a stop in front of Scott’s house. It’s grand, nothing like his old hobbit hole, but still so clearly Scott in the decoration and color schemes. Jimmy would know who built it even if he hadn’t known Scott lived in these mountains.
“I’m here to visit Scott,” he says to the guard stationed outside.
They raise an eyebrow, presumably at the familiar way he refers to Scott. “On formal business or personal?”
“Personal? Sort of? I mean, I don’t have any diplomatic reason for being here.” Truth be told, he has no reason to be here at all, really, but...the ring.
“Then Lord Smajor cannot see you.”
Jimmy grits his teeth, suddenly furious at this whole ordeal. “Then tell Lord Smajor that I need to return his ring.”
“May I see it?”
He sticks his hand out obligingly, and the guard examines the ring, surprise blooming across their face. “I did not realize my Lord had lent you Vilya! My apologies, Lord Codfather, I see the alliance between our kingdoms is stronger than I had assumed. You may pass.”
Vilya? “Thank you, gentle, uh, gentleperson!”
The guard dips their head slightly as he walks by, a gesture of respect that he doesn’t think he’ll ever get used to. He shakes off the strangeness of the interaction, though, pushing open the door to Scott’s house.
The inside is beautiful, exactly the kind of decor Scott loves...and empty. There’s no one in the spacious kitchen, the storage room, or anywhere else for that matter. Jimmy’s seconds from giving up and going home when he realizes that there are stairs up to the balcony above. That’s where he goes, finding himself in Scott’s bedroom.
Which is awkward, to say the least. It’s not like they never slept in the same room when they were married, but now that there’s this awkward, painful distance between them, Jimmy feels like he’s intruding. What’s worse is, Scott’s still in bed, laying on his side with his face tilted away from Jimmy’s awkward entrance.
“Hello, Jimmy.”
Jimmy half-jumps, not expecting that. “How’d you know it was me?”
Scott rolls over to face him, and Jimmy notes that his face is too pale for it to be natural or healthy. “Do you think I could ever forget the sound of your footsteps?” He goes on before Jimmy can answer. “What are you doing here?”
“Katherine asked me to visit, I’m not sure why, but...here I am. Say, why is she visiting every week?”
Scott’s laugh is bitter. “Katherine thinks she can save me.”
“Save you from what?” Jimmy asks, concerned despite himself.
His (ex?)husband doesn’t reply.
“Save you from what?” Jimmy presses, and gets no answer yet again.
Instead, Scott sits up, swinging his legs over the side of the bed. “You should go.” He stands, and immediately stumbles, Jimmy rushing to steady him on instinct. Scott’s hands are like ice when he grips Jimmy’s arm to regain his balance, taking several deep breaths, and Jimmy’s instantly struck by how wrong that feels. Scott’s hands were always warm, even on the coldest nights in 3rd life. Some elven thing, probably, that Scott didn’t want to talk about or have time to explain to a silly human like Jimmy.
“Scott, what is going on?”
The elf brushes him off again, heading for the stairs, but the regal effect is ruined by how hard he has to grip the railing.
“Scott, seriously! Answer me, are you okay? What’s happening?”
Scott whirls to face him, robes spinning behind him. “I’m fading, alright? I’m dying, now leave me alone!”
Jimmy feels like he’s been smacked in the face, the words hitting him with all the force of a well-thrown trident. Dying? “You- what- but elves don’t die, right?”
“We do. From poison, from swords, from arrows through the throat-” Jimmy’s hands fly to the scar on his neck, the one that matches Scott’s own- “from grief.” Scott turns back to the stairs. “Come on. If you’re not going to leave, I might as well show you around.”
Jimmy follows, reluctantly, trying to think of something to say that isn’t incoherent sputtering with a bit of ‘why do you hate me now’ added in. “You can’t just drop something like that on a man, you know!”
“You did ask, to be fair.”
Why oh why is he so stupid around Scott? “I guess so, but- but still, dude.”
Scott pushes open the side door, holding it for Jimmy. “Here.”
Jimmy nods and slips through the door.  “Thank you.”
“Don’t mention it.”
They start along the path, Scott walking far too quickly for Jimmy’s comfort given how terrible the elf’s balance is currently. He nearly has to jog to keep up, irritatingly, but at least they aren’t snapping at each other for a few precious moments.
Of course, Jimmy has to go and ruin that. “So, uh..are we going to talk about 3rd life?” He has to hear it from Scott’s own lips that he remembers, that it affected him even half as much as it’s affected Jimmy.
“Why not? We need to talk about it some time-”
“I said no .”
“It’s literally killing you to not talk about it!”
Scott freezes, face going icy calm in the way Jimmy knows means he’s actually upset. The elf’s hands grip the fabric of his robes tight, his back going rigid. This is a bad idea, Jimmy knows.
He’s in too deep to back out now, though, the pent-up hurt of the past few months all coming out in a rush. “Tell me I’m wrong, Scott! I dare you, tell me I’m wrong! Tell me you never cared about me, tell me you didn’t bother to bury me, tell me it didn’t hurt even a little when I died! Tell me I was just stupid little Jimmy, a toy for an elf who’d live far beyond my lifespan! Tell me whatever, just tell me the truth! ”
Scott breathes out slowly, fury gradually building on his face. “Fine. You want to know what happened after you died? You want to hear about me screaming until my throat went raw? You want to know that I kissed your face and sobbed and begged you to wake up, over and over until I couldn’t speak at all? You want to live with the knowledge that Grian had to physically pull me away from your body? Is that what you want to hear, Jimmy ?”
Jimmy’s name on Scott’s lips punches all the remaining air out of him, sounding so wrong in that angry, bitter tone. Beneath all the rage, Scott sounds wrecked , and the fight leaves Jimmy’s body abruptly. “No,” he says softly. “That’s not what I want to hear, not at all. I’d rather you be happy than love me.”
Silence follows those words, only the faint sound of a waterfall in the distance there to break it.
“I buried you on the hill above our houses,” Scott says finally. “I planted a poppy over your grave.”
“Grian came over the next day. I didn’t want to see anyone who wasn’t you, but I let him in because I had to. He helped me do the straps on my armor and asked me if he could do anything else to make things easier. I told him to bury me next to you.”
Jimmy swallows hard. “Did he?”
“How would I know?” Scott’s tone softens, just a little. “Grian was honorable enough, though, loyal to his allies. I like to think he did.”
“He was a good guy,” Jimmy agrees. “A little bit bloodthirsty, I guess, but good. I don’t suppose he survived any better than the rest of us, though maybe being bloodthirsty helped.”
“Can I- can I ask you why you hate me so much now? I mean, if you mourned me in third life and all.”
Scott turns away again, starting down the path a second time. He’s not looking at Jimmy when he says “I don’t hate you.”
“You don’t?” It’s a shock, honestly, given that this is the first time the two of them have really spoken since the beginning of empires. “But you burned the pufferfish-”
“I didn’t. I kept it.” Scott still won’t look at him. “I never hated you. I don’t think I’m capable of it.”
“Then why do you keep avoiding me?”
“I’ve been kind of busy dying,” Scott says dryly, and Jimmy doesn’t even realize it’s a joke until he looks over at Scott’s wry little grin.
“Scott! That’s not funny!” He scolds, aghast.
“It was a little funny.”
Scott must hear the genuine distress in Jimmy’s voice because he drops the act. “Jimmy, I’m an elf. I won’t live far beyond you, but only because I’ll fade without you.”
“So your solution is to isolate yourself and fade now?” Jimmy demands.
“It does sound stupid when you put it like that, doesn’t it? But I lost you once, and I don’t think I could bear it again.”
Jimmy wants to argue, wants to fight him on this, but there’s nothing he can say. Instead, he puts a hand on Scott’s arm to stop him walking any further. Scott turns to look at him, seemingly startled, and Jimmy throws his arms around the elf.
Scott stiffens before slowly relaxing, arms coming up to wrap around Jimmy in return. It’s not as natural a gesture as it used to be, but it’s warm, gentle in a way Jimmy thought he’d never get again. It reminds him of the soft, starry-eyed boy who put flowers in his hair and laughed at him over a cake. Scott will never be that soft again and Jimmy will never be unscarred, but they’re here. They’re alive, that has to count for something.
Scott pulls back, his expression so achingly tender and heartbroken all at once. “I’m sorry, Jimmy.” His voice is raw, a little shaky. “I can’t. Not again.”
He’s cut off by Scott shaking his head. “Losing you will destroy me. We dared to love, and now all we can do now is lessen the pain when it all comes crashing down.”
Jimmy’s in too much shock to speak, the ache in his heart returning tenfold as Scott turns back towards the house.
“Goodbye, Jimmy.” He sweeps away, elegant as ever, but stumbles and nearly falls as he reaches the door. Jimmy’s not there to catch him.
Jimmy stumbles home in a daze. It's somewhat of a miracle that no mob manages to kill him, honestly. To be so close to a resolution, to have the person he wanted most right there in his arms, and then to have all that ripped away- he can’t think of anything that could have hurt more. Even his deaths were less painful than this- at least an arrow through the throat is quicker than feeling like your heart is being ripped out through your ribs, Jimmy thinks, a little bitter. He throws Scott’s stupid ring in a pool in the swamp, watching as it sinks to the bottom of the shallow water with hardly a bubble.
The ring.
It’s significant, somehow, according to a Rivendell guard, and more than that, it’s an excuse to see Scott again. One last chance to change his mind about the stupid plan that’s literally killing him.
Jimmy dives in without thinking, scrabbling around until his fingers close around the smooth stone and thin band. When he pulls it out, the gem glitters in the starlight even under the layers of dirt, and it looks like something special. It looks like hope.
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agalsmaraudersobsession · a year ago
Tell Her
Billy Hargrove x reader
Not my gif or header (credit to owner!)
Warnings: Language, a very small mention of sex, ANGST ( I hate myself for this🥺🥺)
Word Count: 1.5k
A/N: Hii loves!! Okayy, so this is my first time writing for Billy, so he might be out of character. I really liked how this turned out!! I hope you all enjoy it! As always, feedback/reblogs are appreciated! This is from Billy’s POV!!
✨ Taglist is open for all characters!! ✨
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The sun was beaming on her back, the soft rays of light made her look like a goddess, she could do anything and still look like a goddess. I hold her close to me, I kiss the top of her head ; lavender.  All I can manage to do is lay on her bed, staring at the ceiling. How am I going to tell her this? I'm too far out in my thoughts that I don't realize Y/N waking up. She pokes my side, and I immediately look at her. 
"Good Morning butt!!"  She says with a huge smile on her face. 
How am I going to tell her this? 
I hug her tight and kiss all over her face, she giggles. That sound, the reason why I fell in love with her. It'll all be over soon. I'll have to put up my walls again. I could never love anyone else. 
How. Am. I . Going. To. Tell. Her. This?!
"You okay Billy? Still sleepy? We can stay inside if you'd like. There's always tomorrow. " I shake my head and watch her dress, there won't be tomorrow I rub my eyes and speak up,
"Are you ready to hit the beach? Got a long day ahead." She nods while fixing her hair, I stand up and go behind her. I look at us in the mirror and all I see is a perfect woman with a broken man who hides his feelings and isolates himself in order to not get hurt but somehow we ended up dating. I'm not complaining, she's perfect. She completes me. She makes everything easier, more bearable. I kiss her shoulder,
"Let me set up the car, okay? Come down when you're good to go." I start walking towards the door until I hear ,
"Baby?" I turn around to look at her she smiles ,
"I love you." I smile,
"I love you too baby." 
As I'm walking to the car all I can think is ,"How am I going to tell her?" 
As we arrive at the beach she runs off to the water, pulling me in with her. I hug her tight and we both stare into the sunset. She looks at me and smiles, her eyes filled with worry as she strokes my cheek ,
"Bill, what's wrong? You've been acting strange today. Do you want to talk about it?" Of course she knew something was off. I take her hand into mine and we sit near the water. For a moment there were only the sounds of waves crashing, seagulls, and  children laughing. I look at Y/N and she smiles sadly. 
Now is the time to tell her. Tell her you coward. It's going to hurt her if you wait until the last minute. Wait will it hurt more if I tell her now. No. No. No. I can't hurt her.
"Baby, you know I love you right? With all my heart baby." She nods, she starts looking a bit more worried as I keep talking, 
"You know, I'd never do anything to hurt you right? Ever." She nods and stares at me, 
"If it's hurting you, I would want to know. Even if it hurts me Billy. So please." I shake my head and smile , 
"I just wanted you to know that I would never hurt you, ever. I love you."  She looks a bit suspicious but smiles. Then looks back at the ocean and smiles wide, 
" I want to spend forever with you Billy." I look at her and my heart breaks 
It's not too late to tell her. Tell her Billy. NOW! 
"So do I doll, I want to stay with you forever." I mentally beat the shit out of myself for not telling her. I just don't want to hurt her. 
I park in front of Y/N's house and face her, she looks at me with bright eyes and smiles wide then kisses my cheek, 
"So tomorrow we'll meet up at school right? I have a doctor's appointment early in the morning." I nod and smile wide ,
"Of course, I'll see you there." I get out of the car and hug her tight, I kiss head and grab her face. Tell her Hargrove, it's not too late.. She looks at me with the same wide smile, and starts walking to the door then looks back
"I love you Billy Hargrove. I love you so so much." I chuckle and repeat after her ,
"I love you too my wonderful, beautiful, Y/N, L/N, so fucking much doll. You are my world." She smiles wide and does a little dance, I playfully roll my eyes and watch her go in. I go inside the car and stare at her window, I wait for the lights to go off before I drive back home. 
As soon as I arrive, everything is packed. I sigh and look at Neil, 
"Off with that girl again huh? Eh, I'm sure you'll find another one in Hawkins." I breathe through my nose. No one can replace her. I start taking boxes to the moving truck.
 After everything is in the truck, I go to my room one last time and look around. The place where I met Y/N, the place where I first kissed her, the place where we first had sex, the place where she patched me up after a bad fight. Everything happened here, I was about to walk out when something gleamed on my face. I groan and go find the item that is gleaming, I pick it up and stare at it. The locket that Y/N gave me. It read 'To the moon & back' I opened it and there it was, a picture of Y/N and I on our first anniversary. I gulped back a few tears then placed the locket around my neck. I took a deep breath and walked out of the house, she would be better without the goodbyes. . . or was it me that couldn't handle saying goodbye? I walk to the car and start following Neil in the truck ahead of me. We pass by Y/N's house and I look at it hoping to see her outside. No luck. It's better this way. 
"Goodbye my dear Y/N" Is all I managed to say. 
✨ A/N: I’m thinking of doing a part 2 where they both see each other years later?? Let me know what you think!!✨
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hollowedwing · a year ago
Isekai-ed into Hawk's Life
Hawks x gn!winged!Reader
Warnings: ⚠️ Death!(at very beginning, it is an isekai), mentions of death throughout, some angst(??maybe not yet??), slight cursing
(so sorry i just, love, love, the idea of having wings)
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(this is all my art, it is on IG, im just too embarrassed for people who know me irl to potentially find this xD Even though none of them have tumblr 👀 if you somehow recognize it...props to you?)
tbh, I can’t decide if I want this to have more than 1 part. 
Word count: ~1,800
You were on your way home from a long evening at your part time job. Before that you had already taken 2 finals that morning too.
You dragged your feet, exhausted, as you headed towards the crosswalk. Stopping at the edge as the traffic light turned green, you decided to pull out your phone and decided to watch a speed paint from your favorite artist who recently released a new video.
It just so happened it was a Hawks speed paint 👀
The light turned red and you slipped your phone into your pocket as your started to make your way across the street
little did you know this would be the last time you'd cross the street
A wild driver came barreling down the road, no regards for civilians or traffic lights, probably drunk or high or just someone out for blood.
You stood there like a deer caught in headlights as your life flashes before your eyes
You can barely comprehend what's happening as you felt pain engulf your body and suddenly you were unconscious
Keigo tiredly stumbled into his large apartment, kicking off his shoes and shrugging his jacket off by the door
He wants nothing more than to just flop down and pass out. The HPSC has been giving him hell lately about god knows what.
He let out a long sigh and headed towards the bathroom to do his nightly routine
As he finishes up, he drags his feet towards his bed and flops down face first into the comfort of his pillow and sheets
Keigo falls asleep almost instantly after getting into a comfortable position, worn out from a long day of work
What he wasn't expecting was a loud "thud!" coming from the main room. He jolts up from his bed, feathers ready to attack.
Reader's pov(?)
You groaned as you hit the floor. Your head was spinning and it feels like a truck just hit you
oh wait...
You suddenly became more alert, looking around in a panic, expecting to either be on the road and injured or in a hospital of sorts. What you didn't expect was a wooden floor inside of a random apartment.
You felt around your body for any signs of injury, but all you found were a set of wings on your back- wings?? Hold up. Why did you feel wings what kind of sick joke was this?
Your thoughts were racing as your breathing picked up. What was happening? Didn't you just get hit by a vehicle? Why are there wings in your back? Where are you even?
Feeling around in your pockets, you found your phone and whipped it out, trying for anything. You turned it on, the harsh light of it illuminating your face, you tried to send a text to your best friend, but alas, it wouldn't go through. Actually nothing on your phone seemed to work. You checked your location settings, for some reason it said Musutafu, Japan.
Wasn't....Wasn't that the location that most of Boku no Hero Academia took place?? This can't be right, this has to be a dream right? There's no way that you could have actually ended up here unless...
Then it hit you.
You read your fair share of isekai series back when you were alive in your realm. Mostly manhwas of characters getting reborn into another person's body, but, never actually reincarnating as yourself into another world.
That was the only thing you could think of. You must have been reincarnated into the Boku no Hero Academia world. Except as yourself.
In all honesty, this is not how you thought you'd go out. You didn't know what to expect after death, but this definitely wasn't it. After all, this was a fictional setting, wasn't it?
Well, not anymore because now you're living in it! Smh.
That would also probably explain the wings on your back. This was you now. You have a bird quirk.
Now, all you have to do, is figure out where the heck you are.
Just as you are about to stand up, feathers zip towards you, pinning you to the ground
You hear footsteps begin to come towards you. You don't know if you should be scared for your life considering you've already died once or ecstatic because, you knew for a fact, this could be none other than Hawks' apartment.
The winged hero finally emerges and stares down at you, crossing his arms over his chest.
He says in a low, gravely voice from sleep, "Who are you, and how did you get into my home?" You stare back up at him and nervously chuckle.
"I'm not sure you'd believe me if I told you." You nervously sigh out.
"Try me." He demands, sounding a little more irritated now. You sigh in defeat and start to explain your situation.
"Do...do you know what an isekai is?" You said sheepishly while turning your gaze away from his. He kind of gave you a confused head tilt and just a vibe that said “No”. You sigh again and explain it to the best of your ability. Hawks becomes more and more interested and confused as you talk, but nods a long slowly. 
“So...you were reborn here, but as yourself? Wait- does that mean you died before!?” He asked, disbelief and fear ran through his eyes. You looked at him in bitter amusement.
“Apparently I did. The last thing I remember of my world was getting hit by some truck or car. The dude clearly did not know how to drive. I had the right of way I was pretty sure at least. I mean, the light was red, usually that means pedestrians can cross the street? And plus he was going wayyy over the speed limit,” you begin to ramble on, the reality of actually dying setting into you. Hawks noticed the panic beginning to set into you and released you from his feathers. He crouched down next to you and grabbed your shoulders gently.
"Hey, hey, hey, look at me, you're ok now, right? You're here, and not dying in the middle of the street still. You're here. In Musutafu," he said trying to calm you back to reality. Well, what was your new reality. Your mind was racing. Trying to put together a coherent thought. 
You look up to him, with a panicked look still in your eyes, thoughts started to come out of your mouth as your brain was trying to catch up with the situation. "I'm... I'm in Boku no Hero Academia and, and you’re Keigo... standing... right in front of me..I have wings. I have wings? Jeezus I have fucking wings. And I’m dead in my own world. I don’t know anyone, well, wait, technically, I do know people, just-Oh gods! I’m so sorry, that name slipped out! I- I, I’m really sorry Hawks." Even in your wild state, you noticed Hawks tense up at the sound of being called Keigo by a total stranger, and were able to get out an apology. That was progress? You were slowly coming back to reality.
Hawks froze up a bit at the sound of hearing his real name mentioned. At first he wasn't sure if he believed your tale of the isekai situation, but after this he might have to reconsider it. He opted to shake off that weird feeling for now and focus on different matters. 
" I-I don't know what I'm supposed to do now? I have nowhere to go or to stay. I'm in a whole different freaking universe! My phone doesn't even hardly work here. And I have a pair of wings on my back!" You puffed them out angrily. Hawks glanced behind you and his eyes widened a little. You in fact, did have a set of bird wings. Kind of owl like wings. Not near as big as Hawks', but definitely big enough to fly you around.
Before Hawks could process the words coming out of his mouth, he was already asking you, "Would you maybe like to stay with me? I can help with your quirk too." He glanced away awkwardly. You looked towards him in disbelief.
"Dude, are you sure? We literally just met like 10 minutes ago? I mean, I'm all for it, I have nowhere else to turn to, but if you really really don't want me here, I will politely step out of your life." You so badly wanted to accept his offer on the spot, but being the considerate, mostly sensible human you were, you gave him the option to back out. Hawks shook his head.
"No, no, it's alright. You can crash here. Uh- I mean- stay here! Sorry!" You giggled at his comment.
"Well thank you very much!"
"It's all good. I have a spare bedroom you can occupy for the time being. I'll give you some clothes to sleep in that'll hopefully fit. Accidentally bought a couple things in the wrong size without looking. " (a/n: just...just assume its your size, or oversized, whatever's comfy idk) He jumped up and headed towards his room to grab you the clothes. You still sat on the floor. Still amazed at everything that was occurring.
Hawks walked back into the room and tossed you the clothes. "Hey uh, you know, you can get up now, sorry for holding you down earlier.."
You blushed and scrambled to stand up, "Oh no! It's ok! I understand. This would definitely warrant that kind of action. Some random stranger crashes into your apartment at like 1am. I completely understand. Honest."
He let out a small laugh and wearily brushed his fingers through his hair. The adrenaline of everything finally wearing off. He could feel the tiredness setting into his aching muscles again. “Ah, well, I’m going to head to bed now. The room is down the hall at the very end that you can stay in. I’ll take you out training tomorrow evening if that’s alright?”
You gave a nod of understanding and followed him down the hallway. “Goodnight Hawks,” you sang as he walked into his bedroom. He gave a hum of acknowledgment and closed his door. 
Making it into what was now your room, you changed out of your clothes so fast, eager to rid yourself of the past hours events. 
Not gonna lie, you could not figure out how to properly get your new wings into the shirt, even with the holes and snaps in the back. Your mind was too exhausted to even process this new skill. So you ended up going to bed without the shirt on and just settled for putting the sweatpants on. 
You figured it’d be good to just pass out asap. You were sure if you tried to recount the recent events, you’d spiral into a panicked mess. 
You shut your eyes tightly, willing yourself to sleep, trying to only think of positive outcomes for the future. But to be honest, you didn’t know enough about anything in this realm to think rationally about anything good. 
I prooobably didn’t proofread this as much as I should have
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httpswwwtbhkcom · a year ago
The Next Day
Pairing: Nagito Komaeda x Reader
[@httpswwwtbhkcom’s masterlist]
Summary: The day after you visited Komaeda, you felt a bit weak but you still managed to go to school and visit Komaeda once again.
Warning: Grammar errors, swearing,
Genre: Fluff,
Y/n- your name, L/n- last name, F/f- favorite food,
A/n: I’m so sorry for not posting in over a month! (Except the bnha incorrect quote I just posted few days ago.) I just don’t have much motivation to write lately and I’ve also been stressed with school works.
Reader: Neutral
Click here to see the other part(s) - Part 1 - Part 2 (Here) - Part 3
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Made by: ??? (Please tell me who owns the art so I could credit them!)
☽✧ ✦ ✧☾
“Achoo!” You sneezed. “Are you okay, Y/n? Do you need to go to the nurse?” Yukizome asked, worriedly. You panicked and told her you’re fine and that you didn’t need to go to the nurse. “It’s just a bit chilly here... No worries... Haha...” The others gave you skeptical looks but shrugged it off nevertheless.
“Okay... But if you’re sick just tell me so you could take a rest ‘kay?” You nodded, quickly covering your mouth when you almost sneezed again. ‘This is going to be a long day..’ You sighed to yourself.
☽✧ ✦ ✧☾
It was finally break. You took your water bottle and took a gulp of water, since you were thirsty. “Woah, calm down! You’re going to choke if you continue doing that!” Mahiru exclaimed. You obliged and separated your lip to the bottle, making a small ‘pop’ noise and a small gasp from you.
“Sorry, I’m just thirsty. That’s all.” You let out an awkward laugh as you looked away from her in embarrassment. She placed her hands on her hips, making a small frown. “You visited Komaeda didn’t you? That’s why you’re sick.” You looked at her then nodded “I’m not sick though.” You murmured, but she didn’t hear it. She groaned. “Ugh, I should’ve told you to stay away from him for the time being instead.. He’s ill.”
“Well... I did help his fever go down a bit. I’ll visit him later today.” You said, letting out a small sneeze again. “Sorry...”
She sighed. “You’re going to get sick, Y/n. How about you visit him tomorrow instead? He’ll probably feel better.” You shook your head. Mahiru frowned at your response. “I agree. We can’t risk having another sick classmate...” Peko suddenly chimed in. “Peko?” You shrieked, jumping a little from your seat. “Ah sorry to surprise you. I just couldn’t help but listen to the conversation you both were having.” She admitted, bowing.
She regained her posture and looked at you. “I’m sure Nagito is fine. He has butlers and maids taking care of him. You can just talk to him in the phone if you’d like.” Peko suggested.
“That isn’t enough though...” You murmured, looking down at your desk. Then looking back at them with hope. “But don’t worry about me! I’ll be fine. I’m practically immune to sickness!” You exclaimed like a child. You heard Fuyuhiko scoff. “As if.” He murmured loud enough for you to hear. How many people are listening to your conversation?
“We’re worried about you! I mean- I guess we’re worried about him too.. I think... But I think he’s fine! As Mahiru said, You could visit him tomorrow!” Kazuichi exclaimed. You (and Mahiru) gave him a deadpanned look. ‘What the- how many people are listening to the conversation?!’ You screamed internally, visibly confused.
☽✧ ✦ ✧☾
This time, you went home and changed instead of going to Komaeda’s house first. You changed your clothes to something comfortable and ate a snack. You while you ate your snack, you went to messages and messaged Komaeda.
3:42PM ~Today~
You: Hey Nagito! You online?
Komaeda immediately answered as soon you hit send.
3:42PM ~Today~
Nagito: Yea! Is school done already?
You: Yep, How are you? Feeling better?
Nagito: Well.. I’m less sick than yesterday. Thank you for taking care of me yesterday.
You: No problem! I’ll be going there later, is that alright?
You patiently waited for Komaeda’s response. ‘He’s taking a lot of time..’ You mumbled, a bit impatient.
3:43PM ~Today~
Nagito: Are you sure? I’m still sick. I’m sure you have some symptoms too... If you are getting sick, I’d advise you to go stay at your home. You might collapse.
You: I’m fine Nagito! I’m not sick. I’m immune to sickness! Don’t worry! Now can I pleeasee go there?
Nagito: Hmm... Fine, I’ll tell my butler your coming alright? See you later!
You: Yay! See you later!
3:46PM ~Today~
☽✧ ✦ ✧☾
Komaeda’s POV:
He chuckled at your childish behavior. He was worried that you might get sick, but he didn’t want to decline and make you sad. He kinda admits that he misses you. Komaeda called his butler and informed him that you were coming here again.
The butler nodded then left with the same expression. He looked outside the window, gazing at the view he had from his room as he impatiently waits for you.
☽✧ ✦ ✧☾
Your POV:
You immediately ate the last bits of your snack and cleaned your place. You changed your clothes again and took your phone with you before going out. You went outside and locked the door then sprinting to Komaeda’s house. In the middle of running to his house, you tripped on nothing. You let out a small ‘oof’ as you regained your posture and continuing to run.
☽✧ ✦ ✧☾
3 minutes later, you’re finally in front of Komaeda’s home. Ringing the doorbell, the butler who you saw yesterday greeted you once again. “Good to see you again Madam/Sir L/n. Master expected you to come today.” The butler let you in the house.
“Good to see you too. Is Nagito feeling better today?” You asked, your eyes on the floor in front of you. “Yes, apparently minutes after you left, his fever went down a little.” The butler answered. You covered your mouth and let out a small sneeze. You froze in embarrassment. The butler heard you sneeze and looked at you concerned.
“Are you okay Madam/Sir L/n? Oh my, did you get sick?” The butler asked, slowly walking towards you. You raised a hand, making him come to a halt. “I- I’m f-ine. I’m fine... Just a small sneeze, It’s nothing.. It’s nothing...!” The butler gave you a skeptical look but nodded.
Once you both were in front of Komaeda’s room, the butler opened the door for you. You went in the room and thanked him. The butler nodded then closed the door soon after. You were immediately greeted by Komaeda smiling at you.
“Your finally here! How are you, Y/n? Are you still healthy?”
“I was supposed to say that, But I’m fine. How are you feeling?”
“I’m getting better. Still sick, but it’s better than yesterday..” You sat down on the edge of his bed and looked at him. He looked back at you, giving a small smile. You both stared at each other for a few seconds before you broke it with a groan.
“This is boring! I have no idea what to do today!”
“I’m sorry if I bore you this much I-”
“This isn’t about you Nagito!” You assured. “Are you sure?-” “Yes!” You quickly answered. “It’s just so boring today! What do you want to do?” You asked him. He looked down and began to think of what to do. “Hm. Wanna play the video game you like? We haven’t played it for a while now. I still have it somewhere here.”
“Yes please!” You stood up. “So..! Where is it?!” You looked around. Komaeda pointed to a cabinet and said “It’s somewhere there. The top one maybe?” You nodded and went to the cabinet in excitement. You opened the cabinet and began checking the places.
After a while, you finally found it. “Here it is!” You exclaimed, showing it to Komaeda. He giggled as he watched you set the game. After you finished setting the game, you took two controllers and gave one to Komaeda.
“You want me to play with you?”
“Of course!”
☽✧ ✦ ✧☾
In the middle of playing, you suddenly let out a sneeze. You immediately covered your mouth as Komaeda’s eyes snapped from the tv to you. “Are you sick?” He asked sternly. You didn’t respond. You only looked away in embarrassment. “Are. You. Sick?” He asked once again, his tone serious with a mix of concern. “I’m fine.” You finally answered. “Just a small sneeze, that’s all. No need to worry Nagito.” You lightly hit his arm in a joking manner.
You looked at the game and continued playing. “Just, forget that okay? I’m fine no worries. Let’s just continue playing.” Komaeda sighed and played the game once more, glancing at you every now and then in worry.
☽✧ ✦ ✧☾
After a few hours, you both finally finished playing. You turned off the game and placed the game and controllers back to where you found it despite Komaeda told you he can do it himself.
“Come on Y/n, I’m not that sick anymore. Let me just do this for you for everything you’ve done since yesterday!” Komaeda insisted a bit too late, since you already finished. “Too late, Nagito. Next time maybe.”
He pouted at you but nodded. “Are you hungry?” Komaeda asked you, feeling hungry himself. “Kinda, Yea..” You nodded, your stomach grumbled soon after you answered. “I’ll ask them to make us food. What do you want to eat?”
“I’ll take f/f, if that’s fine.”
He hummed and called his maids to bring him food you both wanted. The maids nodded and bowed then left, making the food.
☽✧ ✦ ✧☾
You both were on his desk eating (since he insisted it, he didn’t want the bed to be messy, and you to be uncomfortable.). “So..” You grumbled, chewing your food. “I have to leave soon, How was this day for you? Fun? Boring?” You asked, taking a bite of your food after. You stared at him as you wait for his answer.
“It was fun. Anywhere with you is fun.” He said, murmuring the last part. Half hoping you had heard it. Sadly, you didn’t. Your current emotion was still the same like seconds ago. He faintly frowned at the indifference but pushed the feeling down.
“I’m glad!” You exclaimed.
Silence quickly took over the room and tension slowly rises. You swore you could hear your heart beating in a fast pace.
“Uhm, so....”
Nervous, you looked at the clock and your eyes widened. “It’s getting late!” You immediately stood up, Komaeda tried to grab your arm to slow you down. But it was too late since you ran to the door and left.
He lowered his hand, staring at the door. Komaeda heard footsteps and saw you. “Almost forgot, Bye!” Then you left again. He sighed, not daring to chase you. Until he saw your phone on his bed.
“But your phone?..” He mumbled as he saw you wave and run to your home. He was going to shout for you to stop but he was too late. The window he was supposed to open was slammed shut and he had problems opening it by his own. ‘I’ll call someone to repair this tomorrow..’ Komaeda thought.
☽✧ ✦ ✧☾
You ran to your home, panting. ‘Gosh, I should exercise more often.’ You thought, opening the door to your house and entering it. You went to your couch and sat there for a few minutes, feeling that you have forgetting something. “Eh.” You shrugged. “It’s probably nothing.” You said as you tried to find your phone.
“Oh no... Ugh damn it...” You groaned as you finally noticed that your phone was gone. “It’s too late.. I’ll just go to Nagito’s tomorrow...” You added as you went to another room.
☽✧ ✦ ✧☾
Komaeda’s POV:
He stared at his hand that have your phone. He called one of his butlers/maids to his room. Not long after, a knock was heard then the door opened showing a butler/maid. “Please call Y/n’s house and tell them that their phone’s here with me.” Komaeda ordered. The butler/maid bowed in respect then left.
☽✧ ✦ ✧☾
Your POV:
You were taking a shower, oblivious that someone was trying to call you. You were too distracted on the sound of the water dropping to the floor, calming you down.
☽✧ ✦ ✧☾
Komaeda’s POV:
The butler/maid didn’t got a response when they tried to call you for the fourth time. They sighed, walking to Komaeda’s room and telling him that you didn’t answer. “Ah I see.... I’ll just give this to Y/n tomorrow. They’ll visit me if I stay here a bit longer, or I’ll just give them to school tomorrow since I’m fine now right?”
☽✧ ✦ ✧☾
Your POV:
After showering, you felt sick. You were on your living room floor coughing. You felt dizzy. “Augh, I didn’t know that I’m actually sick..” You mumbled. You tried to get up with something near you and slowly went to the kitchen to grab a snack and a glass of water. You drank the water in one gulp and refilled the water for later. Then you went to your room, laying on your bed.
‘I hope I could go to school tomorrow.. Being sick sucks when it’s at it’s worst..’ You said to yourself before drifting to sleep.
107 notes · View notes
dangerousstrawberryshark · a year ago
Yandere Tubbo x Male Reader
Warning: little violence (not that detailed). 
This one is going to be short.
Requested from Pokadeathpony
Backstory: You live in Brighton, England, United Kingdom. (I don’t know where Tubbo lives nor do I know where Tommy lives) One day you were walking to go get some breakfast. Until you bumped into George one of your favorite Minecraft streamers and content creators. You were a small streamer, not that many viewers. You and George began to talk, he later invited you to see the dream SMP world, and you meet the other people of the dream SMP. You then got to meet Tubbo. You thought Tubbo was normal until it took a turn. A big turn. 
Btw you are 17. (Tommy will be turning 17 this year and Tubbo will be 18)
M/N: Male name
Y/T/N: Your Twitch Name.
M/U: Minecraft username
H/C: Hair color
S/C: Skin color
F/D/P: favorite donut place.
Sorry if this is bad.
You were sleeping peacefully until I heard the most annoying sound ever. 
*Beep, beep, beep,* “Ughhhhh.” You were trying to turn it off but you kept missing until you finally got it. ‘Finally got that stupid thing off!’ you thought to yourself. “What time is it?” I looked at the clock. “7:35 am. I might as well get up,” you said to yourself as you slowly got out of bed, stretching your muscles. 
You went to the bathroom to do your business and brush your teeth. After you were done, you grabbed my keys and went to go get breakfast.
As you were walking to go get your daily donuts and coffee, you suddenly bumped into someone causing me to fall. “You okay there?” the voice said, ‘I know that voice!’ you thought to yourself and looked up to see George, George Davidson!!
He handed his hand out, you grabbed his hand. “You alright,” he said, you couldn’t process anything, you just stared at him. You snapped out of your daze. “Yeah, I’m okay. I’m a fan of you by the way,” you replied with excitement. 
“Oh? Really?” he said, “Yes! I’m a big fan of yours! I’m actually a streamer just like you,” You replied. “Oh, really what’s your twitch name?” He asked, wondering maybe he’ll check you out. “Oh, Y/T/N!” 
“Okay, maybe check it out later today. Hey, wanna talk and get some food?” you couldn’t say no to that, how many get to eat with their favorite celebrity? “Yes, I would like. Either way, I was going there before I ran into you.” “Alright, let’s go.”
Time skip (You and George went to go eat, and later he checked out your Twitch channel. 3 days later, you got a DM from George saying; “Do you want to tour the Dream SMP world?” and you gladly accepted the offer. And this is where it all began.)
I recently got a message from George saying, “Do you want to tour the Dream SMP world?” and you (Or should I say “we”) know I accepted it. He said tomorrow is when it's happening. 
Time skip to tomorrow. 
I woke up earlier than usual, even beat my alarm clock before it could ring. I went to the bathroom and did my usual. George said he will invite me at 10:30 AM. “What time is it now?” I grabbed my phone and checked, “It's 7:10 AM. Will looks like I’m going to have to wait a while.”
Time skip (3 hours and 20 minutes later)
I hopped onto my PC and started it up. After it started, I opened up Minecraft and checked my Notifications. I received the invite I quickly joined in.
Tubbo POV
I was on the Dream SMP world with Tommy, Corpse, George, BBh, and Dream, when an unknown player had joined the game. That shouldn’t be possible since this server is private nobody can join be us.
“Hey who joined?” I questioned. “Oh, I met this small streamer while I was walking to go get breakfast 3 days ago, and I invited them over to give a tour of the place!” George enthusiastically over discord. 
‘Mmm, so they’re a streamer? Maybe I should get to know them.’ 
Time skip (To be honest this one is rushed. It’s currently 1:08 AM where I live and my mind isn’t functioning right now) 
After I introduced myself and the others did, we began to talk about random things. Apparently, M/N is currently streaming right now, and I went to go check it out. 
After I introduced myself and the others did, we began to talk about random things. Apparently, M/N is currently streaming right now, and I went to go check it out. 
M/N has a facecam on, and I get to see what he looks like. He had looked pulchritudinous. Absolutely exquisite. He had soft fluffy H/C hair, his nice S/C, and how his dazzling E/C shine brighter than the sun. I’m going to say it again, he is ravishing.
‘Wait, why am I calling a guy beautiful?’ this boy is triggering something in me. Something I never experienced before. Something in me wants me to protect him at all cost. ‘No stop thinking about that!’ I pushed these unfamiliar thoughts and feeling down.
As time went on my thing for M/N increased. I don’t know why I’m so infatuated with him. Tried ignoring the thoughts and feelings but they keep coming. 
‘Something is coming out of ME.’ 
Time skip ( 2 months after the meeting)
It’s been two months since our little meeting, M/N is officially part of the SMP world. I’ve been binge-watching M/N streams, his YouTube videos, and I also follow him on all his social media accounts, and sometimes I’ll search the internet to find small information. 
I was currently on a website about M/N. it listed all of the information about him since meeting George is grew rapidly on Twitch and YouTube. ‘I already know all of this!’ I thought to myself as I kept scrolling down until I came upon something interesting. 
“M/n current residence in Brighton, England, United Kingdom.” my eyes widen as I read this, ‘He lives close to me!’ I yelled in my mind. 
I was fanboying until I heard my notifications sound. I stopped what I was doing went to go check who it was from. M/N invited me, I immediately accepted it. The world was loading. “Hello!” M/n yelled.   
It was me, M/N, Tommy, and dream on the server. I noticed that Tommy has been getting close to M/n, really close to for my liking. Tommy would sometimes even flirt, this obviously made me jealous for some reason. 
We were minding our own business until “Hey M/n! Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only 10 I see!” that was the most terrible pick-up line I have ever heard. “Oh my God Tommy?! Really?” M/n said but he was Laughing at that. 
This only made me INFURIATED.
I was minding my own business trying to build my home since I joined 2 weeks ago. The only other people on the server were me, tubbo, Tommy, and dream. Anyway, I was nearly done until Tommy said something, “Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only 10 I see!”
That has to be the most dumbest and funniest pick-up line I heard. “Oh my God Tommy! Really?!” I said while laughing at his attempt at flirting with me. 
Then Tommy went on to say more stupid pick-up line. Some of them were like, “Hey, my name's Microsoft. Can I crash at your place tonight?” and “Are you related to Jean-Claude Van Damme? Because Jean-Claude Van Damme you’re sexy!” Just to name a few. 
I noticed that Tubbo hasn’t been talking as much. I wonder what’s wrong with him. I didn’t take note that was going to lead to something atrocious. 
Anyways we still had fun, Tommy kept trying to flirt. “Hey M/n, I was wondering if we could meet up since you know, we both live in Brighton,” Tommy with hope in his voice, hoping you accept his offer. I began to think, ‘Mmm, should I? Or should I not?’
“You know what? Sure. What time do you want to meet?” I accepted his request. “Uhhhhhh, Maybe on Thursday at 5:30. Meeting place F/D/P.” Tommy replied. “Alright! See you there,” I replied.
No One’s POV
Tubbo was fuming with anger as he was listening in on their conversation. ‘No!!!!! I can’t let this happen! I need to do something.’ Tubbo was thinking to himself, but he didn’t notice that M/n and Tommy had stop talking.
“Hey, Toby! Are you okay? You haven’t been talking,” Tommy said with concern. “Yeah, I’m just fine you know!” Tubbo said with venom and anger in his voice. “Wow there calm down, I was just asking. Geez,” Tommy backed knowing that his friend is anger. 
‘Why is he angry? I did nothing wrong!’ Tommy thought to himself, wanting to know what he did. “You know what, I think I’m going to leave,” Tubbo said as he left the game and went offline. 
“What’s his big deal?” M/n questioned. “I don’t know,” Tommy replied, “I gotta go. See ya later M/n!” “Bye Tommy!” Tommy has left the game. 
“I need to find a way to prevent this meetup!” Tubbo said to himself. Then an idea came into mind. An extreme idea. 
New Messages 
Today at 4:23
Toby: Hey, Tommy. Sorry I lashed out at you today.
Delivered at 4:23 
Tommy is tying…
Tommy: it’s alright mate.
Delivered at 4:23
Toby is typing…
Toby: How about we meet up, so I can apologize in person.
Delivered at 4:24
Tommy is typing…
Tommy: today or tomorrow? Cause I have a meeting with M/n. 
Delivered at 4:24
When Tommy mentioned the meeting toby had to act fast. 
Toby is typing…
Toby: today at my place.
Delivered at 4:25
Tommy is typing…
Tommy: sure thing! When exactly?
Delivered at 4:25
Toby is typing…
Toby: 5:30 
Delivered at 4:25
Tommy is typing…
Tommy: Okay, see you at 5:30
Delivered at 4:26
‘And that WILL be the last time you see.’
Time skip (1 hour 4 minutes)
Toby heard his door knocked. Toby went to go open his door, and there he sees his target. “Hey, Toby!” Tommy let himself in. “So where are your parents?” Tommy questioned. 
“Oh, they’re on their anniversary vacation,” Toby answered. “Ohhh, okay. Wanna head to your room?” “Sure I just need to go get something.” “Okay.” 
While Tommy went upstairs, Toby went into the kitchen. He grabbed the knife and slowly began to walk, he hid the knife behind his back. Once he walked into his room, he locked the door and slowly began to approach Tommy. 
“What are you doing Toby?!” Tommy yelled as walked backward, but then he hit the wall. “It was never meant to be.” those would be the last words, Tommy would ever hear as Toby shoved the knife into Tommy’s heart. 
Toby cleaned up the body by putting it into the trash bag along with the knife. He quickly disposed of the body. 
3 days later
Tommy was reported missing by his parents and the police were on the search. M/n was worried. Toby called M/n to do a cooking stream. M/n was suspicious about this cause this came out of nowhere. But in the end, M/n agreed. 
A few hours have passed and M/n arrived at the residence of Toby. m/n knocked on the door waiting for an answer just then the door swung open revealing a smiling Toby. 
“Hey there M/n! Glad that you arrived!” Toby sounded a bit too happy for your liking. “Please come in!” he invited you in. But as you walked, you heard the door close and lock behind you. Just as you turned around you got knocked by a heavy object. 
You slowly began to wake, you noticed that you were tied up. You looked around until your eyes landed on Toby. He had a wicked smile plaster on his face. 
“Why are you doing this?” you asked desperately wanting to know why. ‘Did he cause Tommy to go missing?’ You thought to yourself until you hear Toby coming to you. 
“You know, I always reject this feeling inside me. This feeling caused me to love you. Tommy was getting in the way of us being together, he had to be dealt with.”
“You’re a monster! You killed Tommy and you think I’m going to love you?!” this angered Toby but didn’t show it. “You’ll learn to love… cause you’ll be staying here…
121 notes · View notes
study-coffee-chicago · a year ago
Stars on your Sleeve (Part 2) [A Jay Halstead Imagine]
A/N: The name of the girl is Y/N (I mostly write my imagines in second person POV...except for the one you guys might see in a few weeks) and cariña is just a nickname/term of endearment in Spanish that means sweetheart. Sorry if anyone got confused about that in part one!
"Dad," you started as you walked into Jay's office after school that day.
It was a Thursday and you had taken the bus from school to the district. It wasn't often that you did this, but you had gotten texts from both your mom and dad telling you that the current case was going to drag on and on tonight, so they wanted you at the district so that you wouldn't be home alone until two or three o'clock in the morning.
"Hi, cariña. How was your day? Learn anything interesting in school?"
"Dad," you groaned. "It's high school, half the stuff they teach me I won't ever use again."
"Well, excuse me for wanting to know about my daughter's day."
"Just can't wait for this week to be over to sleep in."
"You and me both, kid."
"Half the time you work weekends though, Dad," you pointed out.
"Comes with the sergeant title."
"And your sleeping in is like 7:00."
"Point taken. Now, did Mom pack you a few extra snacks or do you need some money for the vending machines?"
"She didn't--"
"Don't even finish that sentence, young lady," Hailey said as she burst into Jay's office. "I packed you a few extra things and you know it. You just want--"
"--Oreos," Jay and Hailey said at the same time.
"Hey, don't blame me! They taste good," you protested. "Anyway, Dad, can I use your laptop to do my homework?"
"Don't you have that school-issued one?"
"That one blocks Netflix."
Jay crossed his arms across his chest. "Homework, huh?"
"I'm just writing a paper. It's not like I'm doing math or reading something."
"What type of paper?" Hailey asked. "Because, I'm pretty sure that if it's a research paper, you need to focus."
"It's a narrative, so I don't need to be constantly focused, Mom."
"Makayla does the same thing," Adam said as he entered the office as well. "Let the kid have the laptop, Jay."
"Thanks, Adam."
"Uh," Jay groaned, "I guess."
"We also have a lead, so you wanna roll out after I give you the info?" Adam asked.
"Yeah. Sorry, Y/N, you need to go into the breakroom now."
"But why can't I stay in here?" you whined. "I want your spinny chair."
"Y/N, this is a case," your mom told you. "You know the rules: no being around the case talk. It's for your own good, we don't want to scar or scare you."
Mom, you know what I've seen, you wanted to tell her, but you knew it would be no use as your parents would never budge on this rule.
"I know, Mom."
Jay pulled his laptop from his desk along with the charger. "Rules?" he probed, holding onto the laptop and charger.
"Dad, I know the rules. Mom, c'mon, tell him."
"It's your dad's laptop, Y/N. I'm not arguing with you or him on this one."
Jay cocked his head to the side. "I'll give you the laptop after you tell me the rules...even though I know you know them."
You sighed. You went through this every time you used his laptop when he was going to be gone. "Only use my account, don't try to login to your account, and do not delete my search history."
"Here you go." He handed you his laptop and charger. "Good luck on your paper. Don't work too hard."
You went into the breakroom and opened the laptop. First, you pulled up Netflix, and then you pulled up your paper. It was your paper for your senior portfolio, which most people were putting off, seeing as you were only a freshman, you didn't need to work on it yet. But, you knew it had to be long, so starting it now would probably be helpful.
The paper was basically a narrative telling a story about each year of school. The stories had to be from two to five pages long, which meant that the paper in its entirety would be between 26 and 65 pages long. But, you didn't mind. It's not like you had to write a boring research paper. You also had to write about your career goals and one wish for your future as well, which would make the paper even longer still.
Seeing as your schooling didn't exactly match up with the American school system until you were around nine and in third grade, you had gotten permission from your teacher to just write about the sections of kindergarten, first, and second grade, as just memories from when you were six, seven, and eight years old.
You'd save the memories of six and seven for later, since you'd have to dig into the part of your brain where you were in the orphanage with your older sister, Illiana.
For now, you just scribbled down a few lines for ideas of when you were eight years old...which was pretty simple since a lot happened in your life that year.
"Y/N, we brought you some food if you--"
"Shut up!" Mouse hissed as the rest of the unit clambered up the stairs and into the bullpen. "She's sleeping."
Yes, when Mouse came home he returned to his job as the tech analyst of the Intelligence Unit. And, when Jay became sergeant, he pulled a few strings and got him a huge salary increase.
"I'll pull the car around front," Hailey offered.
"No," Jay whined. "That means I gotta be the bad guy and wake her up."
"Sorry, babe. I call dibs."
"Ew, guys, please keep the lovey-dovey nicknames to home. I don't need to see that," Adam joked.
"Shut up, Ruz."
Hailey swiped the keys from Jay's office and Jay went to wake you up. But, before he did, he saw the laptop, still open to both Netflix and your paper.
There wasn't much in the paper yet, as Jay had expected, only a few bullet points. His name caught his eye below the age 8 section...whatever that meant. He didn't mean to pry (well, really he did), but he closed the laptop without logging you out so that he and Hailey could take a look at it later.
"Y/N, Y/N, wake up."
You were woken up by someone gently shaking your shoulder.
"Quiero dormir, vaya," you whined. That was one thing you always did: reverted back to Spanish when you were tired. At least both Jay and Hailey understood it now because they had learned Spanish...which helped them with parenting because when they were mad at you, they'd talk in Spanish and that's how you know you were in deep shit.
"I know you want to sleep, and I'm not leaving," Jay answered. "But, we're going home so you can sleep in your bed instead of here."
"Mmmm, okay," you mumbled. You rubbed your eyes, but then decided it was too much work to get up, so you just sat up and closed your eyes once again.
"C'mon, cariña. Mom's got the car out front and then all you gotta do is stay awake until we get home, okay?"
"Mmmm," you mumbled and then stood up. He already had your backpack slung over his shoulder and was holding his laptop in the other hand. "Can I skip school tomorrow? I'm tired."
"Not a chance," Jay chuckled. "But, I can drive you to school and we can get you a frappucino on the way there."
"Mom won't be mad?"
"We don't have to tell Mom everything now do we?"
"No, we don't."
"What are you doing?" Hailey asked Jay as she slid into bed next to him that night. "Are you seriously checking our daughter's search history this late at night? C'mon Jay, she's a good kid. You won't find anything."
"That's not what I'm looking at. But, now that you mention it, I should probably check that, too."
"Then, what are you reading? Because I know for a fact that your case notes are definitely not as organized as that."
"Wow, Hails, you're so sweet," Jay said sarcastically. "It's Y/N's paper. The rubric was pasted at the top and it looks like she has to write about a memory from each year of her life and her career goals and a wish for the future."
"And you were snooping because...?"
"Because I saw my name. I wanna see what she says about us, Hailey."
"Jay, she loves us, baby. We're her parents. We both know that. You don't need to read her schoolwork to know that."
"Either way, I'm still reading it. Join me if you want, or go to sleep."
"Uh, fine. But if she asks, this was your idea and I will not hesitate to throw you under the bus."
Age 8, they both read to themselves, leaving/running away from orphanage
"God, no matter how many years it's been since she told us what happened, it never fails to break my heart," Hailey said.
Jay wrapped one arm around his wife. "I know, babe. I feel the exact same way."
"Hey, Y/N," the therapist started and you looked up at her. "Do you want to in that room over there and watch some tv while I talk to jay and Hailey? I can even turn on the Spanish movies for you."
After getting you all set up, she left you in the room with a Spanish children's movie playing while she went to get Jay and Hailey.
"Jay and Hailey?" she asked as she entered the waiting room.
"Dr. Smith," Jay greeted.
"I have something to tell both of you, and Y/N told me it was okay that I tell you. When I asked if she wanted to be the one to tell you this, she said no because she didn't want to make you sad."
They entered the room where you had previously been and Dr. Smith sat in a chair and Jay and Hailey sat on the couch.
"What's this about?" Hailey asked.
"Well, she told me why she ran away from the orphanage."
Jay and Hailey were shocked. You'd been with them for three months and hadn't once mentioned why you ran away and what happened before Jay found you. It wasn't for lack of trying on Hailey and Jay's part, though. They tried. After all, they knew how to talk to child victims. But, they didn't want to push you too hard, and eventually, they just dropped the topic all together because they knew you'd talk about it when you were ready. Apparently, today was the day that you were ready to tell that story.
"And?" Jay pushed. "Why'd she run away?"
"She said that they came for her, the people who you were fighting," Dr. Smith said.
"Los Rebeldes," Jay said, more to Hailey than to anyone else.
"They came for her specifically?" Hailey asked.
"No, they just came to the orphanage. She said that she heard voices--male voices--telling them to get down on the ground and then some shots rang out. Her sister, Illiana, told her to hide and slipped the necklace around her neck. So, she did. She said she closed her eyes really tight and she just laid there, hiding and barely breathing. She said she heard a gunshot and then she heard Illiana scream and she heard squishing noises."
"Oh my God," Hailey gasped.
"You're saying they shot and killed her?" Jay asked, his voice cracking.
"That's what it sounded like, yes."
"How did she get out?"
"She said that she snuck out through a small door in the back of the room. She said it wasn't a real door, but it was a small door that led to the outside, by her description, it sounded about three feet tall and two feet wide."
"The waste doors," Jay muttered.
"The what?" Hailey asked.
"The waste doors...well, that's what we called them on Base anyway. They were these little doors where you could place stuff outside. Sometimes we'd put the packaging of our MRE's there or other crap we didn't need anymore. Not good for the planet, but yeah, that's what we did."
"So, Jay, you're telling me that Y/N essentially snuck out of the orphanage through a trash chute?"
"Well, we used them for waste, which is why we called them waste doors. But, I heard rumors of them being used at orphanages for parents to put their baby in a crib. They'd just open the door and place the baby in the little crib on the other side of the door."
"She moved the crib and snuck out through there?"
"If there was a crib, then she moved it and got out. If not, she just crawled out through there."
"Did she tell you anything about when she left?" Hailey asked Dr. Smith.
"She said that she didn't have much with her, just her teddy bear and that locket. But, she said that she walked for the rest of the day. And, according to her timeline, the soldiers came right after breakfast. She said she was really scared that they were going to find her and so she just kept walking. But then, she found a bit of a forest it sounded like and since it was starting to get dark and cold, she laid down."
"I found her in the middle of the night and she must've been there since sunset. No wonder she was hypothermic."
"We got her her first banana split after that therapy session," Hailey said. "I honestly don't know whether the food was to get her to try something new or to comfort us."
"Yeah, that was a rough night. I didn't even want her to leave my arms," Jay said. "Jay found me and I went home to Chicago," he read aloud. "Man, that night was rough, too. Probably worse than the night where we found out why she left."
"Now, it's crowded here, cariña so stay cerca to us or go mano a mano with me or Hailey, okay?" Jay asked you as the three of you found a parking spot at Navy Pier.
Adam, Kim, Kevin, and Will were all there as well. They had planned to go out and party and go to a bar when Jay returned home, but that changed now that he and Hailey had a kid to take care of, so they had decided to take a trip to Navy Pier.
In the airport, Jay had gotten a huge coffee from Starbucks, seeing as he had barely slept on the way home. Before coming to Navy Pier, you had gone to a place called iHOP where you had gotten some really yummy pancakes, and Adam, Kevin, and Will had made you laugh a lot and Kim spoke Spanish with you.
"What does that word mean?" you asked.
"What word?" Jay asked, looking down at you as he took your hand.
"Cr-crowded," you sounded out slowly.
"Uh, it means there's lots and lots of people."
"Oh, okay. I stay by you."
"So Y/N, what do you like to do?" Will asked you.
"I like reading and play fútbol," you told him.
"Really? Jay loves playing soccer!"
"We played back at the big house in España," you told Will excitedly. "We won and I got lots and lots of goals."
"Looks like you have a pro soccer player on your hands, little brother," Will said to Jay.
"Don't I know it."
"We go on the big thingy you showed me in the little book in the plane?" you asked Jay.
"The Ferris wheel?" You nodded excitedly. "We can do that, but let's walk around first. We might be able to play some games and win you a friend for Osito."
"Really? Osito have a friend?"
"Really," Jay promised.
As you walked down Navy Pier, you were excitedly pointing out every little thing you saw from the ducks and the seagulls to the big yachts floating down the Chicago River.
"Let's go into Garrett's, babe," Hailey suggested when they were inside the big atrium. "Give her a taste of Chicago's world-famous popcorn."
"I think that's a great idea," Jay agreed. "What do you think, cariña? Want to try some popcorn and then we'll get your favorite?"
You tilted your head to the side. "Popcorn? What is that?"
"Palomitas," Kim clarified for you in Spanish. "Hay muchos tipos diferentes de palomitas allí para probar y comprar."
"Oh, okay. Yes, please."
"What did you say to her?" Hailey whispered to Kim.
"Just gave her the Spanish translation of popcorn and then told her that there's a bunch of different types of popcorn that she can try and buy in there. But, you and Jay most definitely have your work cut out for you when it comes to learning Spanish. You're lucky that she's pretty good with English already and that I'm here to help you learn Spanish."
"Sleepy, cariña?" Jay asked as he heard you yawn from the backseat.
Hailey was driving and he was holding a big bag of caramel and cheddar popcorn...which Hailey was telling him not to eat all of it because she knew he would. You were in the backseat with your big stuffed bear, whom you had named Osita since she was a girl bear because she had really soft white fur and a pink ribbon tied around her. Jay had won that for you when he played a shooting game. You also had a stuffed duck that Will had won for you when he played a guess the weight game. You named him Pato...which meant duck in Spanish. You had gone on the Ferris wheel and had pointed out all the pretty things in the sky when you were up there. Hailey had never seen Jay so happy as when he was smiling wide at every little thing you pointed out and he tried to explain to you what they were.
"No," you answered as you laid your head against Osita. It was currently 3 pm Chicago time, which made it about 9 pm Spain time.
"Tell you what," Hailey started, "When we get home, we can show you your room, and then we can watch a movie and eat this popcorn. Because, if we don't start eating it soon, Jay will eat it all."
"Jay eat it all if we no eat it too?"
"Jay eats a lot," Hailey joked.
You reached your hand in front of you and towards Jay. "Palomitas please." Jay chuckled and Hailey smiled as he put some popcorn into your little outstretched hand. "Gracias."
"De nada," Jay told you.
"When we watch movie, how I get it?" you asked.
"We get it on the tv," Jay told you.
"No, how I know what they saying?"
Hailey hadn't thought that far ahead when she had suggested watching a movie. "Um," Hailey faltered. "We can make it so it's in Spanish."
"But then you no know what they say," you pointed out.
"We can put words on the bottom of the screen in English for us," Jay suggested. "Then all three of us will know what they're saying. Is that okay?"
"Hailey," Jay whispered. "What are we gonna watch?"
"She's too old for princesses probably and way too young for action movies...how about Disney Channel movies? We could try High School Musical? That one's pretty good."
"You're kidding Hails. You watched that? Didn't it come out when we were like 20 or 25?"
Hailey held back a laugh. "Yes, it did. But, I babysat a lot of kids in my neighborhood who were around Y/N's age, and we'd always end up watching those Disney Channel originals."
"Okay, whatever you say, babe."
"I think I'm gonna bring her to bed," Jay said.
You had fallen asleep halfway through the movie. Before starting it, you had seen your room. It was purple! And, in black letters behind your bed, it said Salon de Y/N, which meant Y/N's room. Jay assumed that Kim had helped Hailey with the spelling and the boys had helped move the furniture into your room. There was also a little basket with a few things they thought you would like, such as a few different colored soccer balls and a bookshelf.
On the bookshelf, Hailey had picked out some books in Spanish that she had found at Barnes and Noble and some short chapter books in English that she used to read as a kid, such as the Nancy Drew series and Little House on the Prairie. She knew that you might need help reading them and might not be able to completely understand them all by yourself yet, but she knew that she and Jay would be there to help you.
"It's 6:00," Hailey protested. "Shouldn't we wake her up and have her stay awake for a few more hours so that her body can adjust?"
"If you're asking an adult like me that, yes, I'd stay awake. But, she's a kid. She needs her sleep. And, I'll probably be up before you anyway, so I can deal with her if she wakes us up at five in the morning."
"Okay super dad," Hailey joked. "Bring her to bed. I'll make us a quick dinner and cover this popcorn so it doesn't get stale. Can't wait for us to go to bed tonight." She winked.
"Hails, as much as I would love to take you up on that, I don't think it's a good idea when it's Y/N's first night. But, I will give you all the cuddles in the world tonight, don't you worry about that."
"As long as you didn't pick up the habit of snoring overseas then I'm all for that, babe."
Jay woke up to the sound of soft whimpering. It sounded like it was coming from the hallway but he couldn't be sure. He reached over Hailey and was about to grab her gun from her drawer where he knew that she kept it, but stopped when he remembered that it was probably just you. It wasn't just Jay and Hailey in the house anymore; you were there as well and that's probably where the noise was coming from. And, he didn't want to scare you by holding a gun.
He glanced over at the clock. 3 am. Yeah, sounds about right that you'd be waking up right about now since you'd slept for about nine hours and it was 9 am in Spain right now.
Jay slowly tiptoed out into the hallway, cursing himself that he hadn't left a light on or kept his and Hailey's bedroom door open so you could find them easily.
Jay reached out for the hall light switch and flicked on the lights, causing you to jump. "Hey, hey, it's just me. It's just Jay," he said calmly once he laid eyes on you. You were holding Osito and there were fresh tears running down your cheeks.
Jay never knew the force of an eight-year-old running into him could be so strong as to almost knock him over. You dropped Osito and wrapped your arms around him as if your life depended on it.
"It's okay, it's okay," Jay soothed. "What's wrong, cariña? Can you tell me what's wrong?"
"I-I no know where I was," you mumbled into his shirt. "Was dark. Think you and Hailey left, so I came to find you."
"Oh, sweetie," Jay started. "I'm sorry. I forgot to turn the light on for you in your room so that you'd know where you are. And, me and Hailey would never leave you."
"You promise?"
"I promise." Your stomach grumbled. "Hungry?" you nodded. "Alright, let's get you a sandwich and then get you back to bed."
"You eat too?" you asked.
"You know, I could go for a sandwich."
The next morning, Hailey rolled over to see that Jay wasn't in bed next to her and his side of the bed was cold. Then, she remembered you and walked over to your room and slowly opened the door. You looked up from the Spanish book you were reading and put a finger to your lips.
"Jay sleeping," you told Hailey.
Jay was sitting upright in your bed against the headboard, his thumb holding a place in what looked to be a Nancy Drew book.
"Did Jay read to you last night, huh?" Hailey asked as she walked closer to you and Jay.
"Yeah, he told me that Nancy does what you and Jay do with policia. Then, I sleep again and then I wake up and he sleep again, so I started reading in Spanish."
"I think we should let him sleep a little more while we go finish High School Musical and eat palomitas before Jay eats it all. Does that sound good?"
You nodded eagerly and closed your book. Then, you got out of bed and followed Hailey out of your room. And, after hearing that Jay had read to you and seeing him sleeping upright in your bed so that you'd be able to sleep, she had one more reason why she was truly head over heels for the man she married and got to call her husband.
"Look, Jay. She wrote her birthday in here for age 9," Hailey said as she pointed to the laptop screen.
"God, I don't think I'll forget that day for the rest of my life. It was such a good day."
"You are such a sap when it comes to Y/N."
"Hey! let me be sappy about our daughter, Hailey Anne. She's in high school now, high school. That means she'll be going off to college soon."
"Don't get too far ahead of yourself, sergeant," she joked. "Just keep reading this. It was your idea to snoop through her stuff after all."
"Jay, you got the stuff?" Hailey asked as she was sitting cross-legged on their bedroom floor with wrapping paper, tape, and scissors in front of her.
"Jesus, Hails," Jay laughed, "You make it sound like we're doing a drug deal."
"Well sorry if I want her birthday to go really well. Now, did you get them or not?"
"They're in here." He set a plastic bag down on the bed. He took out three framed pictures and laid them out on the bed. Of course, he made sure that the frames were different shades of purple. "Good?"
Hailey stood up and looked at the pictures. "I never know the CPD's sketch software could work miracles like this, so yeah, I'd say we did good."
Over the past month, everyone in Intelligence had told you that they were testing out a new sketch software to use to try to track down criminals. They let you play with it because they said they wanted to see what it would do...even though they knew what it did, how good it was, and it wasn't new. It was just a ploy to make sure they got your birthday gift right. They had told you to try and input someone's face from memory, someone like your older sister, Illiana.
So, when you had to go to the district for the day with Jay and Hailey, you'd ask to play with that software to work on your sketch. Little did you know, they were printing it out on fancy photo paper and putting it in a frame for your birthday. Jay had also swiped your necklace one day when you had taken it off to go swimming and had taken pictures of what your mom and dad looked like. Then, he and Hailey each took one parent and worked on making their faces through the CPD's sketch software.
"Now what the hell is this?" Jay asked as he held up a big board that Hailey had laying out in front of her as well.
"That, Jay, is so we can stick the back of the frames to it so that we don't have to give the three of them to her separately. Then, she can just take them off from it and place them wherever she wants in her room."
"You're smart. Maybe you should've gone to law school."
"Haha, very funny, Halstead. But then I wouldn't have met you."
"Eh, I beg to differ. You'd probably end up being some prosecution or defense attorney and then I'd have to testify, and after getting yelled at by you on the stand, I'd end up making an ass of myself and ask you out for a drink."
"Is that so?"
"That is very much so."
He walked up to her and grabbed her by the waist and she gave him a peck on the lips. "Hails," Jay whined. "Why'd you phone it in?"
"Because we have presents to wrap. Now, sit your ass down on the carpet and help me."
"Yes ma'am. But, damn, you're really going to be the death of me."
"I'll take that as a compliment."
"Before we do cake everyone, me and Hailey have one more gift for Y/N," Jay announced by tapping a fork gently against his champagne glass. Yes, the adults were drinking champagne because they were celebrating your first birthday with them as their kid. No, they wouldn't even give you one sip...but you didn't care and you didn't ask.
You had gotten spoiled all day. Will had taken you out for breakfast where you had gotten chocolate chip pancakes with all the toppings. Then, he took you to the sporting goods store where you bought an FC Madrid jersey and to Barnes Noble where you bought a few new books.
Then, when you got home, you were surprised to find everyone from Intelligence there along with some people from Med, and firehouse 51. Emilia, Mouse, and Makayla were there, and your friend, Rosa, whom Emilia had introduced you to earlier in the year at her welcome home party since Rosa was one of Emilia's little cousins.
You had gone outside and played a huge soccer game. And, when you got sick of playing soccer, Emilia busted out a makeup kit she had bought for you. And you, Makayla, Emilia, and Rosa did each other's makeup. While the four of you were doing makeup, a soccer tournament had broken out where Intelligence played Med, and then the winner of that game played Firehouse 51. Intelligence won against Med...mostly due to Jay. But, then they played 51 and they got creamed.
"Here you go, nena," Hailey said as she passed you the gift. Hailey had started calling you nena since Jay had a nickname for you, cariña, which you learned now meant sweetheart in English. So, she decided to call you nena, which meant honey. And, you and Hailey had thought it only fair if you came up with a nickname for Jay. So, the one you decided on was quite fitting in your mind: pecas...which translated to freckles. And, Will, well Will calls you Osa because your favorite animal is a bear. It's probably one of only three words he knows in Spanish next to hola and adios.
The gift was long and hard...like a piece of wood. You slowly opened the gift, wondering what else you could have possibly gotten.
You bit your lip as you finished tearing the paper off and flipped it over. "Mamí, Papí, Illiana," you whispered as you held back tears. "¿Cómo lo hicisteis?" you asked. Seeing as Jay and Hailey had been working very hard on their Spanish for the past nine months, they could understand you and could sometimes explain an English word to you in Spanish if needed.
"We didn't really need to test out the drawing thing," Jay answered. "We just needed a picture of Illiana. And, I got the pictures of your parents from the locket."
At this, you started to cry harder, remembering that day when Jay had to cut your necklace off of you in the back of the Med truck in Spain.
You stood up and hugged both Jay and Hailey at the same time. Now, you had both of your families watching over you: your biological family from in heaven and your parents in the here and now. And, your biological family now had no doubt in their mind up there that you would never, ever forget them.
"You remember what she called us that night?" Hailey asked.
"How could I forget? It was the first night she called us mom and dad. I still remember her exact words when I told her we weren't trying to replace her biological family: Son mi familia en el cielo y en mi corazon, pero vosotros sois mi familia aquí."
"They're my family in heaven and in my heart, but you are my family here."
"Oh my God!" Hailey laughed. "She wrote sixth-grade: I cheated on a literature test and Mom had to come to pick me up and I got in trouble. And then, Dad went full-on dad-mode."
"No fucking way," Jay laughed as he brought the laptop closer to him and looked for the sixth-grade section. "I can't believe this is what she's going to write about!"
"Well, in her defense, it was the first time we had to ground her and the first time you went full-on, overprotective, my daughter can do no wrong dad-mode."
"Pretty sure the next time I'll do that is when she gets asked to the homecoming dance later this year."
"Jay! You will not! You will not scare the boys away from our daughter!"
"Well, they should be scared!" Jay argued. "We're both cops, babe. We can make their death look like an accident."
"Jay, what you're talking about is murder and I shouldn't have to remind you that that is illegal. If so, I am going to the Ivory Tower tomorrow to get you stripped of your sergeant title."
"Fine, fine. The next time I'll do that is when she gets her driver's license."
"Hey, on the bright side, we wouldn't have to pick her up from the principal's office then," Hailey pointed out. "She could just drive herself home."
"We wouldn't have to figure out which of us should go pick her up like last time?"
"Exactly. And I'm pretty sure she was thankful that it was you and not me who picked her up in sixth grade."
"Miss Halstead," your literature teacher said as she stalked over to you from the other side of the classroom. "Care to tell me what you have under your sleeve?"
"My arm?"
"I don't like being disrespected in my classroom. We both know you have your phone in there. And, lying to me will just make this worse."
"I-I needed it," you stammered, not wanting to have the whole class hear how stupid you were.
"For a test? You know the rules: no cheating. Principal's office, now. Grab your stuff. And, I'll be calling your parents as you walk down there."
You grabbed your backpack and started your walk to the principal's office. It's not like you had a choice...well, you did have a choice. You could've just not used your phone on the test. But, after that last grade you got on that essay and how weirdly worded the questions were, you basically had no choice but to use your phone. It's not like you were using it to look up the answers per se, but you were using it to try and understand the questions because there was no way you were going to ask that teacher.
"Mrs. Halstead, right this way," you heard the office secretary say as they led Hailey to the principal's office. Your phone was sitting on the principal's desk, the tab you had been using to cheat open and you were fiddling with the strings of your hoodie. You had thought about deleting your search history, but knew it wouldn't be of any use because Jay and Hailey would just be able to look it up with whatever police software crap that Intelligence had access to. You knew you'd be in more trouble if you deleted it and they found out that you were lying, so you decided you wouldn't delete it...even though you were regretting that decision as your phone screen stared back at you.
"May I ask why my daughter is in the principal's office when I thought she should be taking a test?" Jay and Hailey knew all about your literature test that day as you had read the book twice to be ready for it.
"That's exactly why she's in here, Mrs. Halstead," the principal told Hailey. "She was trying to cheat on her literature test."
"She wouldn't do that!" Hailey defended you. "She studied so hard!" She looked between both you and the principal, but your gaze stayed trained on the floor.
"Just take a look."
He passed Hailey your phone and she looked at the search history and the timestamps of said history. "Y/N, is this true?"
You nodded. Hailey sighed. "I'm assuming she's suspended?"
"Since this is her first academic infraction, I'm not going to suspend her. She does need to go home for the rest of the school day, though."
"Thank you. C'mon Y/N, let's go."
You hung your head as you left the middle school, Hailey holding your phone and still trying to figure out why you did this. But she knew that one thing was for sure: the minute Jay got home, he would not be happy.
"You're kidding me, right?" you heard Jay ask Hailey in the kitchen.
You were currently in your room, but the kitchen was right down the hall, so if you were quiet and focused enough, you could hear their conversation.
"I wish I was, Jay," Hailey said. "Just...here, take a look."
You assumed that Hailey was handing Jay the phone and he was looking at your search history.
Jay took a deep breath and restrained himself from shoving the chair into the kitchen table.
You heard his heavy footsteps coming down the hall and quickly locked your door and then sat back down on your bed.
You heard the doorknob jiggle as Jay tried to open your door.
"Y/N! ¡Abras la puerta inmediatamente!" (Open the door immediately!)
You were in deep shit if he was yelling at you in Spanish.
You didn't move from your bed.
"¡Ábrelo ahora!" (Open it now!)
"¡Estoy viniendo! ¡Calmáse!" (I'm coming! Calm yourself!) You got up from the bed and opened the door.
"Do not ever, ever tell me to calm down ever again! Do you understand me?" Jay asked angrily as he flung open your door after he had unlocked it. You nodded. "Now, I understand that you were caught cheating on a test. Care to explain that to me?"
"Not really," you sighed as you sat on your bed.
"I'm giving you one more chance to explain to me why you chose to cheat. And I suggest you tell me the truth, kid."
You looked up to be met with Hailey standing in the doorway. She nodded to you as if to say you better listen to your dad.
"Well?" he asked as he crossed his arms across his chest.
"I needed to cheat!"
"Nobody needs to cheat!"
"Well, I did!" You dug through your backpack and found the paper you had to write for the class that your teacher failed you on. "Because of this!" You threw the paper on your bed. "And because my teacher is a puta!"
"You do not call your teacher a bitch, young lady!" Jay yelled.
"Jay!" Hailey yelled. "Take the paper, go to our room and read it and calm down!"
"So Mom can tell you to calm down but I can't?"
Jay turned back to you, but Hailey grabbed his arm. "Bedroom Jay. Now." He left the room and Hailey turned to you. "As for you. You're grounded from your phone for the foreseeable future. Sorry, nena. Now, we'll be back to talk to you after we've read whatever it is you threw on your bed."
"We read the paper," Jay said as he and Hailey entered your room again fifteen minutes later. "And, I'm sorry for yelling. I know me and your mom are both detectives, but it'd look better if you told us why you cheated instead of leaving us to put the pieces together."
"I'm sorry, I really am. It's just, I failed that paper. And, I worked really hard on it. And, she said it wasn't a real tradition."
The paper topic was to write about a family tradition and you wrote about the Spanish tradition of eating grapes on New Year's Eve. With twelve seconds left of the year, you'd put a grape in your mouth for every second that passed. You'd try to get all twelve grapes in your mouth, but that was really hard. You wrote about the last time you did it with your family and your papí almost got all of them in your mouth while you only got three in your mouth since you were only three years old at the time.
One of the grading criteria for the paper was that it had to be a real tradition.
"She said that it wasn't a real tradition, Dad. She said that because she had never heard of it and that it sounded weird to her, that it wasn't real. So, she failed me. I also put some Spanish words in there, but I put the translations next to it. I thought it would make it more...what's the word? It's kind of like real? Like it'd make it more real to read? You know that word for it?"
"Authentic?" Hailey asked.
"Yeah, that. I thought it'd make it more authentic to read. And, I knew the material of the book. But, the questions were so confusing and I didn't want to ask her to clarify because she's mean."
"So you googled the questions to try to figure out what they were asking?" Hailey asked.
"Yes. I'm sorry. I really am. I just didn't want you to be disappointed in me and think that I've been here for four years and not know English."
"Oh, cariña." Jay crouched in front of you. "We'd never think that. I promise. And I know Mom would never think that either, right?"
"That's right," Hailey agreed.
"Now, I have to go make a phone call."
"You went off on that teacher, Jay! I don't think I've ever heard you that angry when you weren't in interrogation!" Hailey laughed.
"Well yeah! That teacher's logic and grading criteria were seriously flawed. And, you read that paper. It was really good. As Y/N put it that day, she really was a puta."
Hailey rolled her eyes.
"Wish for the future," Jay read aloud. "I wish that I could figure out why Los Rebeldes came to the orphanage and killed Illiana."
"I think that's enough snooping through her stuff for the day, babe," Hailey said, beginning to feel uncomfortable reading this. "Let's just go to bed."
"Yeah, I'm just gonna take a quick shower and I'll be back, okay? I love you." He gave Hailey a quick peck on the lips and made his way to the bathroom to take a shower.
"I love you, too."
But, Jay barely heard her. He was so lost in thought about how to get answers for you, for his daughter. Hell, he wanted those answers just as bad as you. What kind of sick bastard would come into an orphanage heavily armed and just kill innocent civilians and innocent children?
"Mouse," Jay said as he entered the bullpen the next morning, "I need your help with something."
"Jeez, Jay, you're late," Ruzek commented. "Where's Hailey?"
"It's her RDO. And, I promised Y/N a frappuccino because she had to wake up early for school and had to go to bed late last night because we were working a case."
"Does Hailey--"
"No, Adam. Hailey does not know that I gave our fourteen-year-old daughter sugar-laced coffee this morning. And, if you so much as say the words frappuccino, Jay, and Y/N in the same sentence, I will bump you back down to patrol so fast you won't know what hit you."
Jay started to walk towards the tech area where he assumed Mouse would be. His voice carried, so he hoped he'd heard him when he'd said he needed his help.
"Whose idea was it to give Jay all this power?" Adam asked rhetorically. "I think it's going to his head."
"I heard that Ruz!"
"You needed something, Jay?" Mouse asked as he turned around from his laptop and took a sip of his coffee.
"Yeah, can you do something off the books for me?"
"You don't even have to ask anymore, man."
"Just need to make sure you don't assign a case number to it."
"I can do that. Now, what do you need?"
Jay pulled out his phone and pulled up a Spanish newspaper article from two weeks ago. He laid the phone in front of Mouse. "This. This is why I need you."
Mouse looked at the phone and back up at Jay with raised eyebrows. "I'm gonna need you to translate that. I don't speak Spanish."
"Says that the guy who killed everyone in the orphanage that Y/N was in is meeting with his lawyer about an appeal. That son of a bitch. And, it's happening on Monday."
"He's meeting with his lawyer on Monday or you'll know if he won the appeal or not on Monday?" Mouse asked.
"He's meeting with his lawyer on Monday."
"And you need me because...?"
"Think you can hack into Spain's maximum-security federal prison system?"
"You cannot be serious."
"I am dead serious, Mouse."
"Why don't you just wait to hear the news?"
Jay sighed and took a seat next to Mouse. "Y/N has to write a paper and was using my laptop. It was this narrative thing for her senior project, so it's due in a few years. But, I'll spare you the details. Y/N had to write what one of her wishes for the future was and she wrote that she wants to know why the guy killed everyone in the orphanage. Not who, because we already know that it was Raúl Rodríguez. She wants to know why."
"That guy's the one who told them to attack the orphanage? The one that killed her sister, right?"
"That's the prick."
"Okay, I'll see what I can do. I'd know that if it was my sister or my kid that I'd want to know."
"Thanks, man."
"Video and audio?"
"Yeah. I'm probably gonna get Emilia in on this too to translate."
"Why? Don't you and Hailey speak Spanish?"
"We do, but they're gonna talk really fast and I probably don't know law lingo except for the word lawyer."
"Fair enough. I'll get to work."
"Hails, Hails," Jay shook Hailey awake.
"Jay? Why are you home so late?" she asked as she rolled over and opened her eyes. It was almost 11:30 and she had gone to bed half an hour ago...she thought Jay would've been home by 11:00.
"Paperwork," Jay answered honestly. He instantly regretted his decision of waking Hailey up knowing her history of insomnia. "But, I shouldn't have woke you up. I'm sorry, babe."
"No, I'm awake now. What's up?" She sat up in bed and turned on the lamp to see Jay changing out of his clothes and into his pajama pants and an old t-shirt. "You don't have to sleep with a shirt on you know."
Jay smirked. "You'd like that, wouldn't you? But, don't want our daughter to walk in on me shirtless."
"She's spending the night at Rosa's," Hailey informed him.
"In that case..." Jay trailed off and took off his t-shirt along with his pajama pants so that he was just in his boxers. "Better?"
"Much better."
Jay pulled back the covers on his side of the bed and slid in next to his wife. She cuddled into his side and he wrapped an arm around her.
"What'd you want to tell me?" she asked.
"How do you know I wanted to tell you something?"
"You had that look in your eye, Jay Halstead. Now, tell me."
"So persuasive." He rolled his eyes playfully.
"Shut up."
"You love it, though." He gave her a quick kiss on the lips. "You know how Y/N's biggest wish was to know why Raúl Rodríguez attacked the orphanage?"
"Mhmm," she mumbled.
"Well, I'm gonna find out why."
She pulled away from him. "What? How? You're going to Spain? To interrogate him? You know the CPD doesn't have jurisdiction there even though you were a ranger there, right?"
"Hails, I'm not going overseas to find him. I promise you that."
"Okay." She settled back into his embrace. "Then what are you doing?"
"Having Mouse see if he can hack into the prison system so that I can watch the lawyer talk to him."
"And you're going to be able to understand everything they're saying?"
"No, but Emilia will."
"You called her and told her your plan before you told me?"
"No! The only person who knows is Mouse. I figured I'd call Emilia tomorrow. Like I said, I was just at the district late doing paperwork."
"Okay, I believe you. And, we're not going to have her in the room with us, Y/N that is? We're going to tell her why he did this so she doesn't have to hear it from him?"
"Precisely. Now, am I right in assuming that since Y/N's gone for the night that we can be as loud as we want?"
"You are very much correct in that." Then, he gave her a kiss...and this time, he didn't phone it in at a peck.
You were sitting in the breakroom Monday afternoon trying to do some American history homework. There was so much reading involved, but it was okay because you liked history. And, there were pictures in the textbook...it wasn't like you were reading Romeo and Juliet like you had to do in English class.
You knew Emilia was here because she had brought you some fries, much to your mom and dad's dismay since your mom had packed you a few extra snacks. But, Emilia said she had to hold up her reputation as your cool aunt...even if she wasn't related to you whatsoever. And so far, she was holding it up.
You didn't know why she was here, but you assumed it was because Kim was in the field and they needed someone to translate audio. Sometimes Jay would call in Emilia if he knew that she wasn't working to do some translating so he didn't have to deal with calling up a patrolman. You also knew from hearing some of his conversations with Will that Will wanted to ask her out.
And, you hoped she say yes. You wanted Emilia to be your actual aunt. Apparently, she had a thing for doctors according to Jay's side of the phone conversations you'd heard, so you hoped it'd work out if your uncle Will ever got the balls to ask her out.
All of a sudden, Emilia came into Jay's office and he took off running. Hailey saw this and she started following them.
"What?" you asked yourself.
They always would tell you if they had to leave and they'd always be sure to tell you they loved you before they left.
You quietly walked out of the breakroom and towards where you had seen them running to. You assumed they were in the tech area because of the direction they ran in and the fact that whenever Emilia was here, she was most likely in the tech room.
As you got closer, you started hearing Spanish.
Someone talking about an attack...an attack on an orphanage.
A man said it was in the Tabernas Desert.
You peeked your head around the corner to see that on the screen there was a man in a nice suit and someone sitting at a table with handcuffs on.
"Anything we don't already know?" Hailey asked.
"Not that it sounds like right now," Emilia answered. "They're just talking about the orphanage Y/N and Illiana were in and where it was."
So this is the guy who did it. This was the guy--no, the monster--who led the attack that killed your sister.
"The lawyer just asked Rodríguez why he did it," Emilia said.
"And?" Jay asked
"Jay, I need to be able to hear them talk, so shut up."
Jay held his hands up in a sign of surrender.
"The lawyer just asked if it was something personal, something like Rodríguez being an orphan and he didn't have a good experience there so he attacked it, something that would tug at the board of appeals heartstrings essentially." There was a pause as Emilia continued listening. "He said no." She paused again. "Oh my God."
"What?" Jay asked frantically. "Why did that prick kill innocent children?"
"He said he ordered the attack because the orphanage was receiving aid from the US, for things such as food, clothing, and basic necessities."
"Un-fucking-believable." Jay wanted to punch something, but he restrained himself. "So, because our country was helping those who couldn't help themselves, this prick went after them?"
"That's what it sounds like. I'm sorry, Jay."
"Hails, how are we going to tell Y/N?"
"You guys don't have to tell me," you said as you made your presence known. "I heard the whole thing."
Jay sighed. "I'm sorry cariña, really I am. I'm sorry that this happened to you. That you had to find out this way. That this was the reason for what that monster did. I'm sorry."
"Dad read my outline?" you asked, turning to Hailey.
"Yeah, nena, he did. It was just open and you know him, he couldn't stop himself."
"Because he's a detective before he's a sergeant, just like Nancy Drew," you said, bringing it back to the books you'd used to read with your dad every night when you had just come over to the states from Spain and were working on your English.
"This should never have happened," Jay said softly as he walked over to you and brought you into a tight hug. "People that do these kinds of horrific acts shouldn't have the right to be born, much less to live."
"But if that wouldn't have happened you wouldn't have found me. And I wouldn't have found my forever Mom and Dad."
A/N: I wrote over 6.5k words to get this posted today! That's a new personal record for me! Also, my neuroscience class is kicking my butt right now, so if I don't update as frequently, that's why. Hopefully, I'll get one out every week or every two weeks at the latest. Please like/reblog and comment because I love getting feedback and it keeps me motivated to write. If you want to be added to the taglist, just tell me and I’ll add you! 
taglist: @theambracer88 @virtualreader @kelelas-life @celyndavies @brookerz122493 @musicismyescape27 @anotherfan07 @thexplosivegirl @dreamingwithlens @xoxmariaxox @onechicago18 @iamasimpingh0e 
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duskandstarlight · a year ago
Embers & Light (Chapter 9, Cassian POV)
Notes: I had a lovely anon this morning ask for a POV from Cassian’s POV in E&L when he rubbed salve onto Nesta’s back. So, here you go, folks. As usual, apologies for any typos etc etc.
And for those needing a reminder of what happened in chapter 9, you can read it here.
Waiting outside of Nesta’s bedroom door was torture. Not just because Cassian would soon be touching Nesta’s bare skin, but because he knew she was trying to relinquish control by making him wait. And Cassian had been waiting for a long time now. Much longer than was necessary for Nesta to remove her nightgown and wrap herself in a towel.
Cassian bit back the snarl that wanted to emit itself from his throat, because rising to the deliberate wait would give Nesta too much satisfaction. And this was the game they played; continually trying to get one up on the other, riling and prodding and poking until they hissed and snarled and flames sparked between them.
So, Cassian waited patiently. He scented the chamomile salve wafting under the door and—Nesta. More intense than before. Jasmine and vanilla and her. Intoxicating and fiery and steely at the same time, as if she were forged from something entirely different from anyone else in the world.
It was addictive and exhilarating. It woke Cassian up, as if he had only been slumbering before. Nearly five hundred and fifty years of floating through life until Nesta Archeron came along and disrupted the course of things, like a knife thrust through the heart.
Footsteps sounded across the carpet and Cassian straightened, before he decided that a relaxed posture against the doorframe would irritate her more. He only just had time to arrange his expression into one of bored disinterest before the door opened.
Cassian cocked a lazy eyebrow as if to ask what took so long, but Nesta only turned immediately on her heel. He trailed after her into the cold room, trying not to stare at the creamy expanse of her back that peaked beneath her loose golden brown hair—the wings of her shoulder blades and the three freckles which dotted down the far too prominent nodules of her spine where they met her neck.
When Nesta turned back to face him, her pewter eyes were brimming with challenge, daring Cassian to comment on her lack of clothing. But he only twirled a finger—a silent order.
For a moment, Cassian thought she’d deny him, but then she obeyed—for once.
“All over?” he asked, making his voice deliberately practical rather than playful.
Slowly, Nesta dipped her chin. A long pause followed, as if she had forgotten that she had to relinquish the towel. But Cassian did not taunt her. Remained silent and patient, until she seemed to realise it for herself.
When she pulled the towel around to her front, that scent intensified. And when Nesta pulled her hair around her shoulder to expose her neck, Cassian’s nostrils flared.
Fucking hell, sometimes Cassian wondered how he controlled himself around her. Even his blood thrummed beneath his skin, pushing towards her, to the name that beat and chanted on the wind and in the back of his mind, always: Nesta, Nesta, Nesta.
His eyes snagged on that column of skin, and the temptation to bow his head and sink his teeth into her flesh was suddenly so overwhelming that Cassian almost took a step backwards.
But then a glimmer of apprehension fluttered down the bond and that urge vanished, as if it had never existed at all.
“Let me,” Cassian murmured, stepping towards Nesta so he could help to move the remaining tendrils of hair that tumbled down her back over her shoulder.
He ignored the electric sparks that shot through him as he swept his calloused fingers over her bare skin. And when that unblemished skin pebbled under his touch, Cassian realised just how freezing the room was—he wouldn’t have been surprised if his breath misted in front of him.
“Sorry,” he said softly. “I'll be quick, I know it's cold.”
“Just get it over with,” Nesta replied. Beneath his hands, her body was ramrod straight—so preternaturally still it was unnatural even to Fae.
So, Cassian tried his best to set Nesta at ease as he rubbed the salve between his palms, warming it before he dared touch it to her skin. “This stuff is good,” he said conversationally. “I use it a lot. I know humans usually have the worst muscle pain on their second and third day, but Fae bodies recover more quickly. You’ll be sore tomorrow, but it shouldn't last much longer than that.”
Beneath his hands, he felt every inch of her skeleton. Nesta’s body was so thin it felt as if her skin was like paper—as if the bone might pierce through if his touch was too firm.
The knowledge made his stomach clench so fiercely he wanted to smash his fist into the wall. He had let this happen. He had let—
“Good,” Nesta clipped in response, but the sound was coarse, pushed through gritted teeth as his hands skated over what he had guessed earlier to be a sore spot between her shoulder blades.
“You need to start eating right, too,” Cassian dared to say, as his hands traversed down her lower back. He wasn’t sure where the confidence came to comment on her weight, not after she had spat at him when he had pleaded for her to eat at breakfast the other day. “And lots to gain back the weight. I can tell—”
Hot, sharp anger stabbed through him so fiercely that suddenly Cassian couldn’t breathe. Because across the lower curve of Nesta’s back was four silvery scars—claw marks made by ragged nails that raked their way underneath the nightgown pooled at her hips.
The air between them shuddered.
Free of siphons, Cassian’s Killing Power was untamed and unchecked. And that trembling… that was what happened when Cassian was furious enough for his magic to tumble out of him before he could stifle it.
He could not remember the last time it had happened. Not for four hundred years, at least.
“How old is that scar?”
His words were low and fucking dangerous, he knew that. His hands had stilled on her skin, but as he spoke, his left hand moved on instinct rather than logic.
Nesta stilled when he brushed his fingers over what must have been deep gauges. Gently, he traced the path of each cruel line—
“What scar?”
Cassian paused at the thick quality to Nesta’s voice, as if she had wrangled the words out of her throat lest they become lodged there.
That fury spiked again and the windows rattled. “Nesta, is that scar new or is it from that human?”
The way he spoke was too forceful and too commanding. He knew that before the mist started to spark from her fingertips. Before his magic began to roar in his veins at the sight of her power.
The way in which Nesta whirled on the spot was so fast that Cassian thought he’d blinked and missed it. “You said you would do this quickly.”
Despite the hiss, Nesta could not conceal the vulnerability that flickered in her eyes. It was that rare glimpse into that normally closed off tunnel that allowed Cassian’s roiling anger to still for long enough for rationality to kick in.
Slowly, Cassian loosed a long breath and dragged the back of his hand over his forehead in an attempt to smooth away his twisted expression. “I’m sorry Nesta, ok? Just… let me do this. Turn around.”
Those mercury eyes stared him down but Cassian did not balk. Instead, he scoured that beautiful, steely face. Never had Cassian witnessed Nesta smile, but even without it she was perfection. The Cauldron could not have Made someone more stunning and deadly. Even as a human, Nesta had been more breathtaking than any Fae Cassian had ever set his eyes on—would ever set his eyes on.
Nesta must have found something in Cassian’s expression, because slowly—with a final, deathly glare—she turned her back to him.
It was a sign of trust and one Cassian did not take lightly.
Scooping up some more salve, Cassian silently continued his task, gliding his hands over those taut, sore muscles. When he reached those scars again, his hands ghosted over them in a way that was too tender. The skin was ridged and Cassian dared to run a a calloused thumb over the raised bumps.
To his surprise, Nesta did not bat him away or set him alight.
“I’ll kill him for you, if that’s what you want,” he murmured darkly.
That haughty chin tilted upwards. “Why should I let you? It would take the joy out of knowing I can do it myself whenever the mood strikes.”
A low laugh skittered out of him. “Whilst that is a good point, the offer still stands. Or perhaps I can come with you, when you do decide to pay him a visit."
Screwing the lid back on the salve, Cassian placed it on the dresser, averting his eyes as Nesta quickly pulled her nightgown back up. Her skin was covered in goosebumps from being exposed to the cold air, and Cassian glanced towards the open, unlit hearth stacked neatly with pine logs. “I’ll get a log burner installed for your room this week.”
Nesta’s head snapped to look at him. She had been staring longingly at the heaps of blanket on her bed.
It was obvious she was desperate for him to leave.
“I —“ she started, but then she broke off. For a moment, silence fell, and Cassian knew she did not know how to concede—to say thank you.
So, he shot her a crooked grin and said, “I’ll see you bright and early for round two. Don’t be late.”
Tags: @arinbelle @superspiritfestival @sayosdreams @perseusannabeth @mylittlebigplanet @biggestwingspan-az @bellsqueen @ekaterinakostrova @bookstantrash @prophecyerised @rainbowcheetah512 @awesomelena555 @wannawriteyouabook @iammissstark @lovelynesta @melphss @nestalytical @darkshadowqueensrule @laylaameer01 @a-trifling-matter @grouchycritic7794 @thalia-2-rose @champanheandluxxury @swankii-art-teacher @princessconsuela02 @lavendergoomsltd @little-diyosa @princessofmerchants-reads @jeakat @sjm-things @imwritingthesewords @nestable​ @inejbrekkxr @silvernesta​ @inyourmindeye​ @amelie775  @iwastoowildinthe70s @helen-the-weirdo​ @pizzaneverdisappoints​ @wishfulimaginings​ @trash-for-nessian​ @my-fan-side​ @sophilightwood​ @hatemecozuaintme​ 
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phoebe-delia · a year ago
For the song prompt, let’s hear your track 5 lol
Lmaooo this made me laugh, thank you. I've already done my 13th track and now I get to do Track 5! (If you don't know why Track 5 is significant, it's because Taylor Swift puts her most emotional songs as the 5th song on every album).
My Track 5 is, fittingly, a Taylor song; not only that, it's "gold rush," which makes me happy because 1. it's a great song and 2. I actually wrote a fic based on it for the first EVER Drarry as Taylor fic--before I knew this would become a series. It's from Draco's POV, and it can be read here.
I'm so glad to take another crack at this song. This will serve as a sequel/companion piece to the original, but it can stand on its own. Enjoy.
For the first time in his life, Harry was too excited to sleep.
Unlike Dudley, he hadn't spent Christmas Eves and the hours before his birthdays anticipating presents and sweets. He'd never had anything to look forward to, nothing to keep him up at night in anxious glee.
But now, as he stared up at the ceiling, his new roommates sleeping soundly around him, he found himself able to calm his exhilarated mind enough to rest.
He knew that the red and gold curtains that hung around his bed meant that he was in Gryffindor, and he mentally thanked the magical hat for not sorting him into Slytherin with that Malfoy git.
Irritation rose in his chest at the memory of Malfoy insulting his new friend, Ron. Harry'd decided then that anyone who could look at Ron and decide to be so rude to him must be someone to avoid. He knew a bully when he saw one, and bullies, in his experience, didn't change.
Harry turned onto his side to stare out the window, marveling at the novelty of sleeping somewhere with a view other than cramped, blank walls.
He curled up into the warm blanket, finally letting the exhaustion of the day lull him to sleep.
Third-year Charms, Harry decided, wasn't any more interesting than it had been the first two years.
He sat next to Ron, who was watching Hermione take notes with machine-like speed and precision. While the sight of Hermione in action was entertaining for a minute or so, Harry didn't understand why Ron stared at her all the time.
Not for the first time that class, Harry regretted not sitting toward the back of the room. Malfoy was sat next to Parkinson at the table just behind them, and Harry knew it was unwise to turn one's back to one's enemy. It was much more prudent to stare at one's nemesis for as long as possible, using subtlety and stealth to make sure one's observations went undetected.
Ron stared at Hermione almost as much as Harry stared at Malfoy, but surely Ron didn't think their friend was up to something.
Well, unless you called memorizing every comma of Hogwarts: A History nefarious.
“Remember, class, your homework for tomorrow is seven inches on the history of the Summoning Charm. You are dismissed," Flitwick turned to the board, casting a cleaning charm to erase the notes.
Harry was startled out of his reverie by the sudden announcement, as well as by Ron, who nudged him and gestured to Hermione, whose head was still bent over her desk as she wrote furiously.
"How long d'you reckon she'd stay here and write if no one stopped her?" Ron muttered.
Harry let out a short laugh and opened his mouth to respond when he caught sight of Malfoy darting quickly out of the room.
Harry frowned. But before he could voice his pondering over why Malfoy'd all but sprinted from the classroom, Hermione had finally snapped out of her note-taking daze and joined Harry and Ron.
As they walked along the corridor, Ron and Hermione continued to squabble over whether or not they needed to go to the library during their free period.
"But 'Mione, it's called a free period. A period of freedom. Don't you want to be free?"
"I don't want my mind to be enslaved to ignorance, Ronald! Information is freedom."
"Merlin, fine. But I have to go get my textbook from the dorm first. Harry, you coming?"
Harry nodded. Hermione narrowed her eyes at the two of them before giving them a mollified nod. Clutching her books tightly, Hermione turned on her heel and walked briskly toward the library.
"C'mon mate," Ron said, tugging at Harry's sleeve. "Let's take the long way."
Ron prattled on about quidditch, and Harry tried to listen, he really did. But his thoughts drifted inevitably back to Malfoy. He kicked himself again for not choosing a better surveillance point in class; maybe if he'd been watching he'd have seen why Malfoy'd fled class at the end.
He and Ron ventured outside, through the courtyard and into the open area beside the lake. Harry felt a surge of victory and relief at the sight of Malfoy sitting on the bench, his head tilted back with a soft smile as if enjoying the warmth on his face. His hair glittered golden in the sun.
Without thinking, Harry started walking toward him, an animated Ron following along.
“But Harry, they haven’t got a chance! Look, the Cannons--”
Ron stopped talking as Malfoy turned to sneer at them.
“Can I help you?” Malfoy drawled, “Or do you mind taking your boisterous conversation elsewhere? I was here first.”
Ron glared. “Shut up, Malfoy. We didn’t see you, or we wouldn’t have come any closer in case being a prat is contagious.”
Malfoy smirked. “Unlike you, I wasn’t raised in a barn, so I don’t carry diseases. But we snakes do bite, so mind your place, Weaselbee.”
Ron started toward Draco, his fists clenched, but Harry grabbed his arm, despite the rage swelling in his own chest.
“Ron, he’s not worth it. C’mon.” Harry said, eyes narrowed at Malfoy in a clear warning.
Ron gave Malfoy one last glare before he let Harry steer him away from Malfoy, who widened his smirk in satisfaction. They walked away, Ron continuing his rant as they made their way to Gryffindor Tower. Harry looked over his shoulder, catching one more glimpse of Malfoy basking in the sunshine.
“P-Potter,” Malfoy gasped, trapped between the bathroom wall as Harry crowded him, his face inches away. “W-what—?”
Harry shook his head, smiling softly. “You heard me, Malfoy.”
“I-I’m not sure I did, actually. Might you repeat it?”
Harry chuckled. “Why don’t I show you instead?”
Harry lifted a warm hand reached up to cup Malfoy’s cheek, leaned in and—
Harry woke with a gasp, sweat beading on his forehead. A hand scrubbed over his face as he wiped the sleep from his eyes and felt his four-poster ground him to reality.
After the last six years, he was no stranger to waking up in the middle of the night from strange dreams, but his subconscious--or rather Voldemort--usually tortured him with disturbing images and nightmare scenarios.
This time, it seems Voldemort had left Harry's subconscious to its own horny, teenaged devices--and it apparently had a twisted sense of humor.
That moment of blind rage in the bathroom haunted Harry enough during the day that he wasn't surprised that it would make its way into his dreams--but his chest hurt with the knowledge that perhaps it might've gone differently. Might've ended in whispered apologies, explanations, and soft, exploring kisses.
But if Malfoy hadn't hated him before, he certainly did now, and Harry couldn't blame him.
Harry knew a bully when he saw one, and during that moment, he couldn't pretend it had been Malfoy.
He raised a hand to the scar on his forehead and wondered when he'd changed.
“Draco Malfoy, you are hereby sentenced to three months house arrest, followed by one year of probation,” Kingsley banged the gavel, the sound reverberating in the large room before chatter rose from the avid audience.
Harry watched with a small smile as Malfoy and his mother sat together, their cool masks wavering with emotion for just a second before shifting back into place.
He decided to give them a moment before approaching Malfoy, but if he didn't get this over with now, he'd never have the courage.
Suddenly, Malfoy rose on shaking legs and walked over to Harry, who quickly stood to meet him in the middle. Harry regarded him with a tight-lipped smile.
Malfoy tipped his head slightly. “Thank you, Potter.”
Harry nodded. “Sure, Malfoy.”
Malfoy nodded before turning away, stopping when Harry, acting on impulse, reached out and grabbed his arm.
“Wait, Malfoy. I have something for you.”
Malfoy looked at him in confusion as Harry reached into his pocket and handed him his wand, stifling a chuckle when Malfoy’s eye widened.
“Thanks for letting me borrow it,” Harry said, his voice quiet.
Malfoy nodded again. He took the wand from Harry’s hand, closing his eyes. Harry let in a sharp breath at the sight of a soft smile on Malfoy's lips as he reunited with his wand. The image was more compelling than Harry imagined, as evidenced by the butterflies that filled his stomach.
Harry cleared his throat. “Well, er, I’ll see you around, Malfoy,” he said, nodding one final time before turning to leave.
He smiled as he heard Malfoy's quiet, "Goodbye, Potter," as he walked away.
Harry pressed his lips together in a grimaced smile as a few younger students gathered near him at the table in the Great Hall. Ron and Hermione shot him sympathetic looks, and he gave them an apologetic shrug before turning to sign another autograph for a wide-eyed first year.
If this would be an indication of what his eighth year would be, Harry wasn't sure how much longer he'd last.
After promises to fulfill the fans' requests later, the giggling group left the table to let him eat in relative peace--it was rather hard to enjoy one's dinner while half the school was staring at you.
His eyes flickered to the Slytherin table, where the students ate mechanically, their faces blank. Malfoy, who'd sent surprisingly genuine apology letters over the summer, looked thoughtful; not calculating or analyzing, but pensive.
Lying in bed that evening, Harry remembered the image of Malfoy at the Black Lake with his head tipped back in the sunlight. He thought of the rare smile Malfoy'd had when he held his wand for the first time after his trial, and the feeling that had bubbled up in his own chest at the sight.
Harry looked out the window at the night sky and wondered if happiness would be a constant thrum under his skin, or if it could be found in stolen moments tucked into his heart. The stars glittered in silent answer, shining with anticipation.
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woolieshubris · a year ago
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Aquarium Date Fic !! Kagehina, but kag!asd. Kageyama pov. 2k words, oneshot. Tw : Sensory Overload! (it's present throughout the whole fic) Made partially for @spixi and partially so i could prove to myself that i can If there's a typo no there isnt <3 If you are an IRL this post doesn't exist <3
I typed out my message and pressed send, throwing my phone onto my bed.
Maybe I should go grab a snack or something... I think to myself, when I suddenly hear my phone buzzing against my pillow, and I dive to grab it. He replied to my message. That was fast.
Me : Hey we should go to the aquarium tomorrow.
Hinata : Okay :D sounds good 2 me!
Quickly, with my face quickly going beet red, I drop my phone and go to the kitchen to grab something to stuff my face with. I'm shaking, but as long as I walk quietly, I doubt my family will notice I'm even out of my room.
How should I reply? A thumbs up might be good, but it might be too cold. Any other reply is probably too much... Whatever. I'll go with the thumbs up.
I head back into my room and pick up my phone, typing a thumbs up emoji before covering my face again.
F/ck, I need to come up with something to wear, don't I..?
I arrive at the train station, feeling like I probably packed too much. I brought a backpack with an extra phone battery, 2 charging cables, (because Hinata has an apple phone,) and a bunch of snacks, as well as a water bottle.
Did I put on deodorant today??? I can't tell... If so, I'm probably already sweating through it. I start to feel sick to my stomach, but I don't have time to finish that thought when I spot Hinata walking in from a distance. He seems to be wearing basketball shorts and a t-shirt, and suddenly I feel overdressed in my jeans.
"Hey! Don't worry, I already bought my train ticket. You ready to go?" He asked while walking up to me. He didn't bring as much as a backpack, and I'm suddenly relieved that I brought so much.
"Yeah. It's coming in 2 minutes. I half expected you to be late." I stated, before realizing what I said. Sh/t! That was rude, wasn't it? I have to be nicer. Ugh. Hinata punctures my worries with a laugh.
"I'm not late that often, am I?" He states. This makes me feel a little worse about my comment.
"Hm. Just often enough." I state, carefully picking my words. I can't backtrack now, but I can try to redirect my speech to seem less biting.
"You only say I'm late because of last time!" He keeps laughing, keeping the mood light. I wish I could speak as easily as him.
"And possibly the time before that?" I reply. This is probably what he wants me to say.
"Shhhhh. What matters is I got here on time AND I have my ticket ready. Don't worry, I also brought enough for the aquarium ticket too!" He states, smiling. His smile is adorable, almost cute enough to distract me from what he just said.
"Oh, I was planning on paying for that." I reply without thinking.
"Ehh? Do you owe me or something? Should I be asking you for money?"
"No, no. I just thought...?" I'm really confused now. I was the one who asked HIM out, right? He knows how these things usually go, right? Maybe he just doesn't know...
"By the way, where are the others? I thought they would have arrived by now."
The... others? What others? The team??? This is a date, right? Wait...
"I didn't invite them." I respond, my subconscious taking care of what my brain is trying to catch up to.
"You really find them that annoying? I know Tsukki and Yamaguchi can be a bit much sometimes but...?" Confusion flashes across Hinata's face.
"I just wanted to hang out with you. Is that a crime?" I answered before my brain could filter out that last comment. It would be useful in getting him to stop pushing, but it's far too rude for a date. Not that Hinata knows that last part anyway. I wish I could take my words back.
"You should be honored that I said yes in the first place." Hinata teases, my face turning red.
If only he knew what he said yes to.
Hinata and I managed to keep from fighting on the 30 minute train ride, which was a feat in and of itself.
I can't ruin this date.
"Hey, Kageyama? It looks like there is a student discount, and it also seems like there is a discount for groups. What do you think would be cheaper?" Hinata elbowed me, bringing me back into focus. I look up. He and I are both equally sh/t at math.
"Uh... Let's do the group discount? I'll pay for it. You can pay me back later." As if I'd let him do that. Hinata bought my excuse though.
"Okay! I can buy you lunch or something." He quickly walked up to the desk, and I followed him. "Can we have 2 tickets?"
Wait. Wasn't I supposed to buy them? If I was the one paying, aren't I supposed to ask? Is Hinata planning on paying???
"Oh, sorry, He'll be paying!" Hinata stated, gesturing towards me.
"Yes. Here's the cash." I quickly press down the bills that were almost getting damp from stress. I had already looked online at ticket prices, and made sure to set aside the perfect amount of money for two tickets in my pockets.
"Great! Let's head inside!" Hinata grabs the tickets, holding mine for me. We go up to the metal detector and I get my bag checked. Hinata, possibly because he has my ticket, or possibly out of kindness, waits for me.
"Can you hand me my ticket real quick?" I ask, throwing my bag back onto my shoulder.
"Sure, let's go in." We walk into the main lobby area, waiting to get our tickets checked. The aquarium is beautiful, and oh so huge. The high ceilings, and smell of saltwater, the giant whale sculpture that I can only assume is life size, and the concrete flooring, these things that on a glance are grand, start to give me a pit in my stomach.
"Kageyama! Come on!"
I look at the horizon line, and recenter myself. A quick yet deep breath and I'm ready to go. I walk up, and turn in my ticket in order to get a wristband.
"Kageyama?" Hinata states, causing me to look over at him. "Can you help me put this on? I can never do it by myself." He holds up the paper slip.
"Yeah, sure." I say without thinking. I wrap it around his wrist.
"Hey, make sure not to make it too tight. They are a pain to get off if you don't give them enough breathing room." I nod my head, and make sure to give him a gap.
"There you go." I let go of his arm, realizing just then how warm my hand is. I can feel my face getting warm too.
"Okay, let me do you now." He quickly fits the bracelet to my arm. "It's perfect! Let's go inside. I wanna see this penguin exhibit that I've been hearing so much about. I keep seeing ads for it and I've wanted to see it forever-"
Hinata kept talking. I don't think he ever stopped talking. It's nice though. It makes it easier to not focus on the huge building, or the shifting lighting, or the crowds, or the ambient music that made the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end. Yup. I'm not focusing on any of that. Not. At. All.
My feet keep walking, despite my worrying. Hinata eventually slows, stopping before the largest piece of glass I've ever seen in my entire life. A giant tank filled with fish. The glass is taller than my house, longer than 3 busses, and blue and endless enough to make my heart stop in my chest.
Hinata turns around, and finds a bench to sit on, patting the seat next to him, while staring into the blue void. You feel like you have to bow down to its majesty. It is terrifyingly blue, terrifyingly enormous. I have never feared the ocean before, but I fear it in this very moment. A spotted whale shark swims past, paying no attention to the many people standing right against the glass.
"I could sit here forever." Hinata practically whispers. The giant tank orders your complete and utter silence. Even amongst a giant crowd, even with the littlest of children, everyone is quiet. The large speakers playing calming bass tones over the crowd of people, barely vibrating the floor.
"Hm. Me too." I reply. I could sit here forever, I feel like I already have sat here for infinity. Like its presence is something I could never escape. The pit in my stomach grows further. I break eye contact with the tank, reaching in my backpack. The zipper can barely be heard over the ambient noise of people shuffling. Was there always that sound? I bend down to look in my backpack. What was I going to get?
"Do you want a snack? I brought some granola bars." I state as I feel Hinata's eyes looking down at me.
"Actually, that sounds really good right now. I was just thinking about food." He states, bringing his head down to meet mine. I rustle around in my bag, and grab out a bar. It is barely bent. Passing it to him over my shoulder, he grabs it and unwraps it, sitting on the bench with his legs crossed.
"Sooo, what exhibit did you want to see?" He asks, taking a bite after.
"What do you mean?" I reply, choking down the pit in my stomach.
"Like... you invited me out here. So, what was it that you wanted to see?" He takes another bite.
"Uh. I just like fish, I guess." I look over at the tank, trying to avoid his gaze. I doubt he'll buy it, but it doesn't really matter.
"Me too! Let's go into the jellyfish room next? I can see the entrance to the penguins here and it looks packed. Explains why it's so much emptier here." He set his feet back on the ground and stood up, waiting for me to join him.
I leaned back down to zip up my bag, and we walked through a doorway into a smaller, darker room. Blacklights lit up the moon jellies as they calmly glided across the tank. Hinata seemed to drift off, but I didn't mind. It would probably be a good idea to be apart for a bit. I could calm down and collect myself quickly.
I walk up to the tiny seahorse exhibit, and look into the tank. I can't see them at all... I thought, when suddenly, I felt my forehead bump up against the glass.
How did I get close enough to bump up against it?
I go to look for a wall to lean up against. Leaning against something should help keep the pit down. I do a quick glance around the room. There are no walls. Only glass, and only fish. I hate fish.
Taking yet another deep and quick breath, I go back to meet up with Hinata. He was looking at a different kind of seahorse.
"Okay, I think I'm ready to go to the next section now." Hinata said, glancing away from the fish and over to the exit door. I nodded, and lightened up the scowl that was forming on my face. I didn't even notice it was happening until I felt my eyebrows aching from the effort. I just hope he didn’t notice.
The exit of the jellyfish room led to a balcony overlooking a lower floor. This must be the back of the aquarium. Below us there seemed to be a small cafe overlooking the sea.
"Here, let's go get some food! I can pay you back for the ticket that way." Hinata pulled my arm over to the down escalator. I step on right after him, and look down at the cafe.
It was very large, and honestly reminded me more of a cafeteria than a cafe, with lots of seating. After we reach the end of the escalator, he walked over to stand in line and stare at the menu. Looking for a good seat, I grab one right by the large window facing the water and set down my bag. I pull out the small amounts of snacks I've already brought to claim the seat and go over to Hinata.
"Hey, so I'm thinking about getting a sandwich. What do you want?" He stood, facing the menu.
"Honestly, just get me whatever you think I'd like." I state. I can't focus on the menu right now; I just don't have the energy to.
"Hmmm... Okay!" Hinata walks up to the register, while I go back to our seats. I'll probably regret that choice very soon, but I have backup food anyways, and I'm sure he'll eat whatever I don't, so it's not like the food will be wasted.
What the hell did he order??
I look at my plate, not quite understanding what the dish is even supposed to be.
"You said to get you whatever." He said with a smile, taking a bite of his sandwich right after.
"Whatever I might LIKE. What even is this?" I poked my dish with a spork, and it seemed to swallow it whole.
"No idea. I just pointed at the dish in the buffet." He shrugged. "I thought it might be funny, but it's less funny than I hoped. I expected more of a reaction." He looked up with the last sentence, making eye contact with me, which I broke a moment after.
"Sorry? What are you saying sorry for? Since when did you say sorry anyways?" There was slight worry behind his voice, though it was hard to tell through his wide grin. To avoid answering, I quickly shove the food in my face. It's not great, but it's not really all that bad either. It's a little cold from sitting out.
"It's.... good." I say with a stuffed face. This causes him to start laughing again.
"You look super angry! That's the sort of reaction I was expecting." When did I even start scowling again? When I took a bite of the food, probably.
"You try it." I say, stealing a chip from his bag.
"I was the one who bought it anyway. I was half expecting you to make me eat it." Am I really that predictable? He took a bite, and made a variety of expressions, before settling on confusion.
"I wouldn't call it good. Maybe okay? It's definitely at least okay." He nodded to himself, taking a sip of water after.
"So, where to after this?" I ask.
We ended up on the train home while the sun was setting. It's almost to our stop. It felt so short, but we ended up hanging out for 5 hours. I almost forgot that I wanted it to be a date. I had to give up on that a while ago.
"Hey, we have to get off soon, get ready." I say, tapping his knee.
"Hm? Oh." He wakes up, blinking a few times and leaning forwards in his seat. He glances out the window.
The train stops, and we walk off onto the station platform.
"See you at practice tomorrow!" He says with a large smile, walking backwards towards the exit.
"See you." I reply, gripping the shoulder straps of my bag. I looked down
"I had a nice time on our date!" and with the last word, he turned around, running out of the station.
My head immediately turned upwards to where he was, as I feel my blood starting to rush to my face.
He... HE KNEW?!?
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jbbuckybarnes · a year ago
Scared & Sacred - Ch. 2
Pairing: Din Djarin x Reader Description: The Mandalorian had helped you while you were hunted for your family name and you had grown a little closer over the months, but you didn’t expect THIS. How was this possible after just three times of getting so close to him. You had to find a nurse as fast as possible. Warnings: pregnancy, angst, lots of emotions, canon typical violence, fighting
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Chapter 2 - The Letter
Every night you prepared some more food in little portions to keep you alive on the journey you would start soon. You had three pairs of every clothing in a compartment that you would put into a bag, bought another bag on the last planet to put the food, water and a blanket in. Even got a cheap med pack on the last planet. On the next planet you‘d leave. You‘d find someone to bring you back to that harmonic place where the nurse droid told you that you were expecting.
„Cyare?“ You closed the compartment as you heard him come closer. „Hm?“ You looked up at him in front of you, holding a fuzzing Grogu. „Something‘s upsetting him.“ Arms reached up and grabbed Grogu out of Din‘s gentle grasp. „Hey, sweetpea, you‘re safe here. We won‘t let anything happen to you, yeah?“ You tried to calm him a bit. It worked a tiny bit, but he wiggled free again to sit on your lap and nuzzle into your belly. „Better?“ You chuckled and got a coo of agreement, making you chuckle. Eyes wandered up to the Mandalorian again, „It‘s okay, he can sleep here.“ It would be a nice last night having Grogu sleeping right on top of you, showing love to his sibling. You started to notice that region of your body growing harder to the touch. „Do you mind if we share?“ Din‘s modulated voice reached your ears. „I‘d prefer sleeping alone, if I‘m being honest.“ You answered softly, shutting him out of your heart and bed. „Did I do anything to upset you? You‘ve been very distant since we left Arcaro.“ That was the harmonic planet, you saved the name internally. „I miss your touch.“ „Oh, no no. Just having a lot on my mind at the moment. Going through memories of my childhood and all.“ That was only half a lie, so you didn‘t feel very bad. „If you need to talk, you know I‘m there.“ You nodded softly, starting to hear Grogu snore. „Get some sleep, Din. You have people to hunt tomorrow.“ You smiled and saw him nod before heading off to his cot.
You couldn‘t sleep with the journey ahead on your mind, so you grabbed a piece of flimsy and started writing a letter to Din that you would leave behind, attaching your soup recipe that the kid liked the most. You put it in an envelope and put it between your pillow and the mattress. Shortly after the exhaustion of the day got you to fall asleep for a few hours. 
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Din and Grogu were hunting for a Corellian woman while you got the last important pieces for your journey and the ship. You filled up the food supply, bought another melee weapon and you found a very used vest that would hold off blaster shots that you put on under your gown. Once all of that was done you checked through your backpack and side bag and put them on your body. A deep breath went through you as you looked around one last time. This was a great home and protection for a while, but it was time for another chapter in your life. You‘d miss Grogu a lot, as well as the beskar armored man with the patience of a Jedi.
You headed down the main street of the city to find a ship you could fly with all the way back towards the planet of Arcaro. You ended up meeting a woman that used to be a fighter for the Republic. Hated the Empire and thought bounty hunters are annoying. Seemed safe enough. As you took off she asked, „What‘s your business here?“ „Leaving behind the people that helped me run from the people that hunted my family because I‘m with child and they weren‘t ready to accept that kinda life.“ You kept it short but clear. „Damn, that sounds like a lifestory if I ever heard one. Who knocked you up?“ She was direct. Reminded you of Cara. „The man that protected me for the last months. Very kind, kind of emotionally incompetent, definitely wouldn‘t take the news well.“ „I see.“ She nodded before jumping into hyperspace. She knew you had the credits to pay her, everything else was just listening to your interesting story and getting a good tip for a market.
Din stepped into his ship with Grogu. It was dead silent, not completely unusual. What was unusual was the fact you didn‘t react when he called out „Cyare?“ The child in his arms cooed in confusion and looked up at him with a frown. „She might still be caught up on the market. We‘ll wait.“ But even that plan fell away once he had fully arrived home and opened the compartment that you had fully stocked before leaving. „Oh, I‘m having a bad feeling about this,“ he whispered to himself as he closed the compartment and put the scanner on his helmet on. Only your footsteps, no others in sight. That didn‘t make sense. She never really went on walks, when she did she always was back in time to welcome him. He followed the steps and arrived in another hangar. „Hey, you there!“ He pointed at the slightly intimidated man near the hangar. „Y-Yes?“ „Have you seen a human woman in white and blue gowns, a green bag and braided hair? This big, cloak is blue too, with white details on it.“ „She went through here, yes.“ „Did she seem afraid?“ „No, she was acting normal. Talked to a woman that frequently takes travellers with her to other places. Seemed to be ready for a trip.“ „Dank ferrik! Thank you.“ NOW he was a different type of concerned. Why did you leave? Willingly! He scanned over the holopad the man held, taking in the information on it that he hoped was about the ship you were in.
When he got back he noticed one of his weapons missing in his arsenal, your blue blindfold on the co-pilot seat and everything neatly cleaned and organized in the kitchen. This was starting to kill him from the inside out. What had happened? What would make you get up and leave on purpose? From the man you loved and the child you cared for so much? He checked your bed. It wasn‘t made. The only thing in here that wasn‘t neat and tidy. And there he saw it, something sticking out from under your pillow. His mind went back to the time he found a little booklet there. A booklet about human children, medical stuff. He took off his gloves and grabbed the flimsy, opening the envelope he held in his hands shortly after and noticed it was a letter addressed at him.
*Dear Din, I know this might be confusing. That I‘m gone now, that I went without telling you. I know it‘s dangerous out there and that you are a big reason I‘m still breathing, but I couldn‘t bear the idea of making a decision benefiting you and leaving me lost. When you told me you weren‘t ready for a child, I knew I had to leave. I won‘t decide against it and I didn‘t wanna hear from your voice that I shouldn‘t keep it. I‘ll miss you. I‘ll miss Grogu. He‘ll miss his unborn sibling too. I know how excited he was for it. I‘m content with knowing that the child was created out of love. Two months and about a week ago. I hope that gives you rest about the situation. I‘ll go back to Arcaro. The place with the beautiful market and one of the best nurse droids I‘ve ever met. I‘ll figure out where to go and how to be on my own from there. I hope you don‘t mind that I took one of the weapons you barely used in the last months. Have this recipe for Grogu in return, he loves it the most and sleeps the best after eating it. Love, Y/N*
Din was drowning in an ocean of feelings. He wanted to cry, scream, beg, jump in happiness and yearned to have you in his arms. Oh, how much he wanted to have you in his arms right now. How much he wished you would‘ve told him that day. He would‘ve pushed away all your doubts. He would‘ve worshipped you, your body, the wonders happening inside of you. Instead you were running from him like he was some disgusting monster. 
He sat down in the pilots seat with Grogu on his arm and the letter in the other hand, setting it down gently and punching in the coordinates to the planet you mentioned. You‘d arrive there after him if he did this trick right. 
You gave the Republic lady a big tip and a hug. „It‘s rare to meet someone to talk to like this. Thank you for the ride and the long talk.“ You smiled at her and she grabbed both of your arms gently. „I land here every now and then, so if you ever see this piece of metal land, say hello.“ She grinned and let you go.
You stepped down the ramp of her vessel to see the market you loved so much fairly empty. It was really early in the morning on this planet. You got closer to the market and saw how some vendors currently refilled their little shops. „Where do you think you‘re going?“ A dark voice was audible behind you. It was familiar. „Kuuvi?“ You turned around to the man that has been hunting you for a year now. He used to be a good friend. „Yes, it‘s me.“ You turned around to him with a smile. „How have you been?“ You asked as if he didn‘t have the capacity to kill you right there. „Eating good, having a nice ship, good people around. How about you?“ He shrugged. „Except for the nice ship I can only say the same.“ „Where is your tin can?“ „Oh, he‘s just getting some supplies. Looking for a better ship at the moment. Razor Crest is great and all, but it gets crammed in there.“ You chuckled. Being royalty made you a master of lies sometimes „Twi‘ku still wants you on his doorstep.“ He gave a dirty grin. „You still work for that half-rotten idiot with bad rates? Moff Gideon would pay you so much more, I mean he‘s the source.“ „Either would pay me enough to retire if I deliver you.“ „Well, would be against the code of any guild.“ „Huh?“ „Pregnant women aren‘t allowed to be hunted.“ With a sweet grin you watched him realize the information you had just dropped and frown, enough distracted time to run one of your knives through his throat. He grabbed after you, getting out his vibroblade, but you had a gun trained on him in return, stepping on his lung and taking out the knife. „Traitor!“ You pulled the trigger and burned a hole through his heart. Two more men were running at you, one got a blastershot to the throat and the other got your new staff punched over the head.
You looked up to see people around the market hiding behind stuff, before hearing a saber lighting up behind you. „It‘s nice to see you alone for once.“ Moff Gideon. You were dead. You were so damn dead. „What do you want from me?“ you growled and heard him chuckle. „Not much, you just took something from me that you can‘t give back.“ „My brother killing your daughter isn‘t something that involves me!“ „No, but I overheard you are with child, so we might as well call it even.“ He charged at you with his dark saber, but just before it could hit you there was something big landing between you both.
„Nobody hurts my child.“ You heard his possessive and protective voice. „Oh, how sweet.“ He attacked Din ruthlessly, making you both step back further and further. Troopers came at you from left and right and you took out the second weapon you stole from Din, shooting left and right while leaned against his back. Behind you the saber strained against Din‘s arm guards. „Give up. You won‘t win this.“ Gideon hissed at him. You heard more jetpacks land behind you. Three blue Mandalorians landed in Din‘s sight behind Moff Gideon. „You have something that‘s mine and you better give it to me.“ You heard a familiar female voice. „Bo-Katan Kryze.“ His voice was somewhere between a chuckle and an unsure shakiness. There were no living stormtroopers anymore in just seconds and the four Mandalorians closed in on Moff. His saber not working on their armor. „Any last words?“ Bo-Katan asked with a serious voice. „They‘ll never stop coming for you. For your children, your family, your friends, your religion. They will always watch.“ Din put a blaster shot through his head from a low angle, „Psycho.“
He turned around to envelope you into the safety of his arms, „Cyar‘ika!“ You were shaking and gripping onto his cape, „I‘m okay. We‘re okay.“ „You can‘t just run off like that.“ He sounded wound up, probably thinking about what would‘ve happened if he hadn‘t arrived in time. „I thought-“ „Your thoughts aren‘t the reality. You really thought I‘d tell you to get rid of your unborn child. I told you children are seen as sacred in Mandalorian culture.“ You looked behind him and got a nod from a helmetless Bo-Katan, „We‘ll get this done, go talk.“ Din tightly put his arms around you and you shot up into the sky before landing on top of a building. His hands, freed from gloves, wandered over your cheeks. „I wish you would‘ve told me. I wish so much that I could‘ve been able to tell you to stop worrying and I wish you would‘ve been able to see me jump in joy at the news. I know we don‘t talk a lot, but this was the time you should‘ve talked. If I had said something negative you still could‘ve left.“ Your lip started trembling, he was right. You were so dumb for doing this. „Hey, no no, I understand why you did it, cyare.“ His helmet touched your forehead. His hands wandered down your sides, „Can I?“ You nodded and felt his hand wander over the hardened skin on your lower belly. He went on his knees before you, hands on your hips before they wandered to his helmet. „Din, no.“ You whispered and heard the hiss. „I thought about this for a long time. There is not one way, there are multiple ways that all have the same core. Look at Bo-Katan, Boba, all these people we met. I grew up in a version of this religion that doesn’t work for me anymore, I don‘t want that to be our child's life too. I want to live it our way.“ And with that the helmet came off. „They are gone, no one can hurt you two and Grogu anymore.“ „But the Empire.“ „We‘ll deal with it.“ The helmet went down and you could finally see his face. Soft face, with harsh features, smiling, „Besides. You looked pretty hot fighting off those idiots.“ „Wait till I break your hand while delivering the child.“ You chuckled with tears streaming down your face. He was so beautiful, so gentle. His nose pressed against your belly, his grip on your hips tightening just enough for you to feel even safer. „Where‘s Grogu?“ „On the ship, probably eating all the supplies.“ You both chuckled and enjoyed the moment for a while longer. „I can‘t wait to meet you, ad‘ika,“ he whispered to your unborn baby. There was so much love in his eyes that you started crying again. „Oh, cyare.“ He took your face in his hands with a caring frown on his face. „Don‘t mind me, just hormones.“ You chuckled to lighten up the situation. „My riduur.“ His bare forehead met yours. „Huh?“ „It- It means partner.“ He said it with such an innocent unsureness that you had to whisper a small, „Oh, baby.“ „I‘ll open up to you more, yeah? We‘ll find a good planet to stay.“ „I like this one so much.“ „I know, cyar‘ika. But maybe we should go to Sorgan for a while before coming back here. Grogu will have children to play with and you will be able to relax.“ His thumbs still caressed your cheeks. „Okay, my knight in shining armor.“ You smiled and kissed his nose, before taking his helmet and putting it back on his head.
You flew back to where you had fought, finding Bo-Katan with the dark saber. „I can rule over Mandalore again and you both are more than welcome there once it‘s done.“ She sent you both a smile. „We might take you up on that.“ You smiled back at her. „We‘ll clean this up and make sure nobody else is hunting for your children. We owe you for finally having this in our hands.“ She held up the saber. „Thank you,“ Din said sincerely and nodded before you said your goodbyes and went back to the ship.
You found Grogu arms deep in a jar of nectar. „Oh Grogu.“ You giggled and he turned around with his signature coo, ears falling at being caught. „It‘s alright, but don‘t do it again. You wanna see your dada‘s face?“ You asked picking him up, cleaning him with something from one of your bags. His eyes got wider and his ears perked. You let down both your bags and the cloak before turning around to Din. „Ready?“ You smiled and he nodded before taking off his helmet. The child gasped and reached for his face, so you held him up to it. He babbled while touching all over his face, Din chuckling and intently listening. Had he always looked like that beneath the helmet when talking to Grogu? „Dada.“ His and your eyes widened at that. You turned Grogu around to look at you and praised him, „Good boy, you love your dada so much, don‘t you?“ A tiny giggle came from his body before he wiggled again. „You wanna say hello to your sibling?“ Another squeak. You sat down on the floor, so did Din while also losing some parts of his armor. He watched as the child put his hands on your belly and closed his eyes, you felt the gentle tingle again. His tiny green nose nuzzled into your skin right where he felt his sibling through the force. „You‘ll see it in a couple months.“ You smiled down at Grogu and gently touched his ears. He could sense that good things happened. That you both weren‘t as worried as you usually were. „Let‘s go to Sorgan and meet the children you like playing with, yeah?“ Another happy squeak came from the green child. „Ner aliit.“ Din murmured softly. You understood without asking. You were his family now and he was yours.
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levi-lover · a year ago
New Light Part: 2
College Levi x Reader(Modern AU)
W/C: 5.2k 
T/W: None
A/N: Levi is a moody English major who spends his free time reading at the local cafe. I’m having a lot of fun writing this ! (pic from pinterest)
I’ve put all the parts in one list here:  New Light Masterlist
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Levi’s POV
Levi and Erwin sat in silence on their drive home. The blinker would occasionally fill the car with a strong click. Levi counted the lit up rooms in the passing apartments. Five, Six, Seven… He wanted to keep his mind off of you, the way your hair framed your face, your hand caressing the mug, the way you pressed your lips together when you listened someone speak. 
“So, how long have you known (Y/N)?” Erwin asked as if he knew Levi was thinking about you.
“A couple of months,” he responded. 
“Do you like her?” Erwin prodded. 
“She’s nice,” Levi said. 
Erwin nodded, he knew better than to ask further. 
This was how their conversions normally went, Erwin would begin with a blunt statement and Levi would respond in a short manner. From an outsider’s perspective, it might have seemed like the two men weren’t friends but this dynamic worked for them. Erwin was straightforward with what he wanted and Levi didn’t like talking about personal subjects, even with one of his closest friends. 
When they arrived to their shared apartment, they said their goodnights and went into their rooms. Erwin had to be up early tomorrow for a debate meeting and Levi wanted to be alone. After they moved out of the dorms they decided to keep living together because it was the most cost effective option and plus Levi liked that Erwin was as neat as him, almost as neat. They lived in an old, walk-up apartment ten minutes away from Wall Rose University in a quiet neighborhood. They’ve been living there for three years now and had no plans to move out anytime soon. 
Levi opened the window slightly to let the cool air in, raindrops fell from the gutter and filled the dark bedroom with gentle taps.. He laid down on the bed and breathed in the smell of the city and old books in his room. He closed his eyes and let his body melt into the bedsheets, he used the same lavender fabric softener his mom loved. Mmm, I should give her a call tomorrow, he thought. He felt his thoughts bounce around in his head but he was too tired to unravel them. Levi focused on his breathing and eventually his thoughts subdued into lenient bystanders. 
There was silence around him when suddenly, you popped up in his thoughts. Levi let out a small sigh. Fuck, what are the odds of her knowing Hange. Hange of all people,the one person who doesn’t know how to shut up, Levi thought. Frustration began to fill his chest. He wanted you to meet his friends and he wanted to know more about you but he didn’t want it to happen like this. Levi wanted to do it right with you. He knew wasn’t the most charismatic or hospitable person and romance wasn’t his forte. Romance, Levi thought and chuckled. He remembered Erwin’s earlier question. Do I like her? 
He sat up and pinched the bridge of his nose with his index and forefinger. He didn’t have a ton of experience with romance. His only relationship with Petra ended in a disaster, she broke up with him after feeling neglected for months. That was never Levi’s intent, he loved her but he didn’t know how to express it. Whenever he saw her on campus she would always give him a smile and wave which Levi would reciprocate. He regretted the way everything ended but he was thankful she didn’t hold a vengeance against him. He was 18 and foolish but he was older now and slightly less foolish. 
Levi looked out the window and started to form a plan in his head. It was evident he had some sort of feelings for you, you were funny, pretty, easy to talk to and you cared about what he had to say. He smiled as he remembered how earnestly you looked at him while he explained the latest book he was reading, he started reading books he thought you might like. Shitballs, maybe I do like her. There was nothing he could do now, he didn’t want to do anything until he had a better understanding about what you were thinking. He nodded his head, proud of his plan. 
The hardwood floor creaked as Erwin walked over to the bathroom. Outside of the window, the sky was beginning to glow with a soft orange hue. Levi closed the curtain, pulled off his clothes and tucked himself into bed. He curled his body around a pillow and slowly began to drift off, eager to wake up to begin his plan. 
The crisp autumn hit your face as you opened the doors to the lecture hall. You felt light and airy after finishing your genetics midterm. It was one of the hardest tests you’ve taken but you felt okay about it. Hange had helped you study for the past week and their enthusiasm and studying techniques helped you out immensely. I owe them big time, you thought. Your phone buzzed in your pocket, it was Hange.
You: thank uuu, i feel good about it! 
Hange: YAY! We’re out in the park blocks! Join us!
You: ok !
You stared at the screen and re-read the conversation. Join us...they must mean Levi and Erwin. You scoffed the tip of your boot into the pavement, the familiar feeling of nerves began to dance in your stomach. Slowly, you made your way to the park blocks, the on-campus park where students would have picnics and study sessions. Students began to pour out of lecture halls and other buildings, eager to celebrate the end of midterms week. There was an undeniable feeling of excitement as they cheered and laughed. 
You stood at the edge of the park looking for the trio. Levi waved his hand from a picnic bench and smiled at you. Your heart momentarily stopped and you realized you’ve never seen him outside of the cafe. He was wearing a hunter green sweater and his black overcoat. The wind feebly moved through his hair but even from farway you could see the deep circles around his eyes. You made your way to the trio and gave out a half-hearted hello.
“(Y/N)! How do you feel?!” Hange shouted.
“Fucking relieved,” You said. Levi smiled. 
“I’m proud of you, (Y/N). Hange told us about all the hours you studied for the exam.” Erwin gave you a thumbs up. 
“Thanks, dude. How were your midterms?” You asked as you sat down next to Erwin. 
“They went well! I think I got an A on my Political Theory exam but we’ll find out soon enough.” 
“Erwin, you clown, you know you aced that test.” Hange rolled their eyes. “But thanks to the lovely Levi, I know I got an A on my essay.”
Levi frowned. “Tsk, I was surprised you even knew how to spell.”
Hange hit Levi’s shoulders and he swiped back. 
“Hey, stop it you two,” Erwin scolded. “I swear, they’re like children.” 
You laughed and nodded. The Levi you knew was always stoic and calm but Hange brought out a different side of him. He looked happier even when he was annoyed. You grabbed a dead leaf from the table and started to pull it apart, rubbing the dead plant bits between your fingers. 
“Are you good?” Levi’s voice broke your concentration. You looked up and met his gray-blue eyes.
“Yep, all good here.” You smiled at him and he returned one back. 
“That’s fantastic! So tonight. Ymir’s Bar at eight. Got it?” Hange ordered. 
Erwin and Levi nodded in response and looked at you. Your eyes darted between the three of them.
“Uh, I would love but I’m hanging out with a few people tonight.”
“Please, join us! Your friends are more than welcome to come, the more the merrier,” Hange begged.
“I beg to differ…” Levi mumbled.
“Shut up, grumps.” Hange elbowed Levi and returned their gaze back to you. “It’ll be fun, I’ll buy you a shot.”
You rolled your eyes, “fine, but I’m buying you a shot. I owe you, Hange.”
Hange squealed and clapped their hands. “Yay! My friend, Moblit will tag along too. You haven’t met him yet but he’s great and such a talented artist. You’ll love him.”
“Sweet, I’m excited, can you send me the address?” You responded. Hange nodded. 
“Who are you hanging out with?” Erwin asked.
“Oh, uh. My boyfriend and some of our friends,” You muttered. 
“I didn’t know you had a boyfriend. (Y/N) why didn’t you tell me?” Hange asked, heartbroken. 
Erwin glanced at Levi. He was looking at the grains in the table, his heart sank but he knew better than to let his friends know. 
“I don’t know. It didn’t seem like the most important thing to talk about during our study sessions.” You were unsure why but you felt defensive over Hange’s comment. 
Hange looked hurt at your response, you felt a pang of regret. You didn’t mean to keep your relationship a secret but your life didn’t revolve around your relationship so it felt pointless to bring him up. The air around the table was tense and cold. The sun was setting and the four of you were on the brink of being enveloped by the shadow of a large lecture hall. 
“Regardless, I’m eager to meet your boyfriend and friends,” Erwin said in a strained voice. 
“Yeah, I’m excited for all of you to meet. I think I’m going to go home and get ready.” 
“Of course, we’ll see you soon,” Erwin said in a quiet tone. 
You waved goodbye to all of them, the trio waved back and you made your way to the bus station. As you waited for the bus, you sent your boyfriend a message to meet your new friends at Ymir’s. He sent back a simple thumbs up emoji as a response. You pulled out a pair of headphones and blasted music to drown out your thoughts. Yet Levi’s face kept on appearing in your head, the way the sunlight caressed the hard lines of his face, his honest smile when he was with his friends, the way his eyes lost their glow when you announced you had a boyfriend. We never did anything. Hell, I didn’t even know his name until last week so why should I care what he thinks. We’re just coffee shop friends, that’s it. The bus pulled to the stop, you waited for everyone to exit before entering and made your way to the back window seat. The glass was cold on your forehead but it felt nice. You sighed, preparing yourself for a night out with your new friends and your boyfriend.
Levi’s POV
After you left, Hange and Erwin looked at Levi with concern in their eyes. Levi noticed their stares and glanced up at them.
“The fuck you looking at,” he growled.
“Levi, I’m sorry,” Hange whispered.
“About what?” He scoffed.
Erwin was about to speak but Levi abruptly got up and buttoned his coat. “I’m going home. I’ll see you both at Ymir’s.”
Erwin and Hange exchanged a look and nodded. When Levi made up his mind there was no stopping him. They watched him walk away, his head was slightly lower than usual. Levi walked over to the bike rack and unhooked his black low handle bicycle. In one smooth motion, he drapped his leg over the seat and began to peddle home. The wind hurt his face and burned his lungs but he pushed harder and harder on the pedals. Crouching down on the seat as he biked up the hills, hoping to ride away from the bench to run away from his disillusion that you could love him.
A few hours later, Erwin, Hange and Moblit entered the apartment. Hange called out to Levi.
“Hey, Mr. Grumps! We have something for yoooou!!” They called out.
Levi moaned and rolled out of bed, his bare feet hit the cold ground as he dragged himself to the living.
“What is it, Four Eyes? Hey, take off your disgusting shoes,” he scolded. “Oh, hey, Moblit.”
Moblit raised his head slightly as a hello. He wasn’t a man of many words. Hange held up a bottle of whiskey and grinned. “So we could pre-game. Take this as a thank you present for helping me write my essay.”
Levi rolled his eyes and smiled. He was touched by Hange’s generosity but he would never dare show it to them.
“I’ll grab us some mugs,” Erwin said and began to walk towards the kitchen.
“No, Erwin! Tonight’s a shot type of night,” Hange said deviously.
The three men looked at them and hesitantly nodded. They wanted to relax and unwind but a  night out led by Hange always ended up with someone’s head in the toilet. Still, they each filled a shot glass, cheered and downed the alcohol. They drank for a while, everyone’s faces were glowing. Hange was blasting music and dancing. Moblit watched them with admiration. Erwin and Levi were giggling over something stupid Erwin said.
Erwin looked at the clock, it was closing in on 8. “Shit, we should get going.”
“Hey, man watch your mouth. And maybe we should stay in. It’s cheaper,” Levi said.
“Levi, noooo. We can’t do that. We told (Y/N)  that we would meet her at Ymir’s!” The alcohol was already getting to Hange.
“Who’s (Y/N)?” Mobit asked.
“My friend from genetics! And Levi’s too,” Hange proclaimed.
Levi rolled his eyes. “Tsk, she’s not my friend. I hardly know her.”
“Mmm, if you say so.”
“Whatever, let’s go,” Levi said curtly.
The four of them grabbed their coats and headed to Ymir’s. It was only a ten minute walk from their place. Hange let everyone know that you had already arrived and saved a table on the back patio. As they walked, they talked about their finals and plans for the upcoming break.  When they arrived at Ymir’s, they pushed open the door and entered the humid room. The bar was full of people celebrating the weekend, a couple was making out in one of the booths and people were lined around the bar. They ordered their drinks and walked through the back doors.
Levi’s hands began to sweat and he felt a lump in his throat when he saw you. You looked beautiful under the glow of the patio lights, you were smiling and had a beer glass on your lips and you were laughing. Erwin stood in place and Hange stopped their chatter.
“Oh, so that’s what they’re doing now,” Hange spouted.
They were referring to Zeke who had their arm around you and to Porco and Pieck who were sitting across from you and your boyfriend.
You saw the group at the back entrance and waved. Your nerves from earlier were completely forgotten after your second beer. Zeke rubbed his thumb against your shoulder and you smiled out of habit. You made eye contact with Levi and gave him a toothy grin, his eyes darted away. Your friends looked at the party headed towards them and stopped talking but you didn’t notice.
“Hey, I was wondering if y’all forgot where the bar is,” you joked but no one laughed.
“Erwin. Levi. It’s been a while,” Zeke stated.
You looked at him confused. “What? You know them?”
Zeke chuckled, “yeah, I guess I do.”
“Zeke, it’s nice to see you again. Same to you Porco and Pieck,” Erwin stated.
Porco and Pieck looked at each other and smiled. “It’s nice to see you too, Erwin,” Pieck said in a sweet voice.
Levi glared at the way Zeke’s arm was draped across your shoulder. He gritted his teeth. Hange noticed how tense he was getting and placed a hand on his shoulder.
“What a small world! I’m glad everyone knows each other. Guys, sit down!” You motioned at the empty seats at the table, completely misreading the space.
Hange was the first to sit and the rest followed. The table was quiet for a few minutes, everyone sipped on their drinks.
“Levi, I like your scarf,” You pointed to the black scarf draped across his body.
“Yeah, it’s such a nice scarf,” Zeke repeated.
Levi gave Zeke a dirty look. Hange looked at him nervously and Moblit put a hand on their knee to calm them. You took another sip of your beer.
“Yeah, Zeke, it is a nice scarf. That’s why I complimented it. Anyways, how do you all know each other?” Confidence surged through your veins thanks to the alcohol.
“We were floormates freshman year,” Levi’s dry voice said.
“Wait-oh, I see,” You said.
Erwin began to make casual conversation with everyone while Levi stared at the bottom of his glass. Hange and Moblit joined Erwin and conversed with the other two at the table. Wait, is Zeke the one that called Erwin’s kickback lame? That’s the only possibility, right? Your head was dizzy from the alcohol but the puzzle pieces were starting to fall into place.
“Hey, (Y/N),” Porco called out.
“You good? It looks like we lost you there for a second.”
“Yeah, Porco. I’m fine,” You said sarcastically.
“Zeke, you and (Y/N) make a good couple,” Erwin said.
Zeke chuckled and squeezed you closer to his toned body, “I know but thank you.”
You kept your head down unsure about what to do. It was evident that Zeke had an issue with Erwin and Levi but you didn’t fully understand why. From what you heard, Zeke was the one who was mean to the other two but Zeke was your boyfriend so you should be on his side, right? You took another swig of your beer.
“Levi, are you still with Petra?” Pieck asked.
Petra? Who the fuck is that, you thought, anger coursed through your veins.
“No,” Levi said.
“Oh, that’s too bad. She was such a lovely girl,” Pieck sighed.
“Who’s Petra?” You asked.
No one answered your question. You looked at Pieck but she kept her eyes down. What the fuck is up?
“She’s a girl I dated freshman year,” Levi explained.
Hange broke the tension by shouting, “(Y/N), I promised you a shot! Who else wants one?”
Pieck, Moblit and Erwin raised their hands. Hange called over a server and asked for a round of shots for everyone. A few minutes later, they brought tequila shots for the table. Everyone grabbed their lime and raised their glass.
“To finishing finals!” Hange exclaimed.
The table repeated what Hange said and took their shot. You and Porco laughed at Pieck’s face and she stuck her tongue out at you. Zeke kissed your cheek and you leaned into his warm body. For a second, it felt like it did at the beginning of your relationship. You felt safe and hopeful but those feelings disappeared when you caught Levi looking at you and Zeke. Immediately, you pulled away and Zeke frowned. You weren’t one for PDA but after a few drinks you didn’t mind showing your man some love but under Levi’s eye it felt wrong.
“Let’s do another shot!” Hange shouted.
“Hange!! Let me buy you a shot!!” You shouted back.
“(Y/N), you’re the best!!” Hange exclaimed, their cheeks glowing under the lights.
Everyone took another shot and the mood around the table began to lighten as everyone got drunker. Porco made a few jokes that made Erwin laugh. Zeke talked to Hange about their senior thesis. Everything seemed to be falling into place except for Levi. He didn’t make an effort to hold a conversation with anyone. He stared at the empty shot glasses and occasionally smiled at whatever Erwin said.
The patio lights shadows made Levi look heavenly, the soft glow bounced off his pale skin and you tried not to stare but you couldn’t, he looked so pretty.
Zeke could sense that your thoughts were taking you elsewhere so he gave you a kiss on the check. You gave him a smile in return.
The bar was packed and everyone at the table was talking after a new round of drinks. It should be a perfect night, all of your friends seemed to be getting alone but something didn’t feel right. In that moment, you wished it could have been Levi holding your body. Stop, Levi is just a friend, that’s it. I love Zeke. You repeated in your head over and over.
As the night dragged on, you slowly began to lose touch with reality, everything became a happy, surreal blur. Throughout the night, Zeke kept his hands on your body. Before that would have kept you grounded but now it felt off, you weren’t sure if it was the alcohol but you didn’t want him to touch you. You kept on smiling and talking to everyone until the bartender called for final orders.
“This was nice but I think we should get going now,” Erwin declared.
“Yeah, I think you’re right,” Pieck said.
Everyone gathered their belongings and started to walk towards the front door. Zeke walked ahead with Porco and Pieck but you stayed behind with the others. Erwin, Hange and Moblit left you and Levi together alone. Hange’s arm was wrapped around Moblit’s shoulder. They leaned against their body and continued talking.  
“Hey, I had a good time tonight,” You said to Levi who barely acknowledged your existence.
“It was okay,” He stated.
The two of you followed the others.
“But what are the odds of us forming a friendship in this way, right?” You said.
“Tsk, a friendship? We hardly know each other, I wouldn't push it,” Levi responded.
“I guess you’re right,” You muttered.
Levi felt bad about his harsh tone but he didn’t know what to do. He still had the same warm feeling in his chest from before but watching Zeke touch you hurt him. All of you had exited the bar and you walked over to Zeke and he placed his jacket over your shoulders.
“Well, it was, uh, nice to catch up with all of you. Hange thank you for helping my girl study. Get home safe,” Zeke said. You smiled and everyone and waved.
“Zeke, the same to you too. Glad to know you’re doing well. (Y/N) congrats on finishing midterms. See you later,” Erwin said.
“I love yoouuu! I love all of you!” Hange shouted. Moblit still had his arm around Hange to stabilize them.
“Love you too, Hange!” You blew them a kiss.
They all turned and began to walk home. Porco and Pieck had already left in their Uber. You looked at Zeke and he gave you a smile and you smiled back out of habit.
Zeke made conversation on your way back to his place. You wrapped your arms around your body and counted the steps in between each street light. The air around you was dry and your breath fell to the ground in a transparent cloud. Eventually, you made it to Zeke’s apartment, it was highrise close to downtown. When you entered the apartment your attention immediately went to the large windows. They faced the city skyline and the lights poured into the living room and gently outlined the minimal furniture in the room. Zeke led you to the bedroom and began to kiss the back of your neck. His beard tickled your neck and left goosebumps on your skin. You rolled your shoulders and stepped away.
“Come on,” Zeke groaned.
“No, not tonight. I’m really tired,” You said.
You made your way to the bathroom and turned on the harsh lights. The lights bounced off the white tiles and highlighted the bags under your eyes. You stared at yourself for a while, the longer you stared, the faster your thoughts swirled in your head. Is Levi made at me? You splashed cold water on your face and tried to wash off the awkwardness from tonight but no matter how hard you scrubbed, you couldn’t get the image of Levi staring at the empty glasses out of your head.
When you walked back into the bedroom you saw Zeke passed on the bed. You smiled at him and placed a blanket over his body and brushed his hair away from his forehead. You curled up on the opposite side of the bed and wrapped a blanket around yourself. Zeke’s soft snores filled the room, normally that was enough to lull you to sleep but lately it was becoming more of a nuisance. Why am I feeling like this? I love Zeke and he loves me back, that should be enough. So why do I feel so unsure? Zeke wasn’t your first partner but he was your first proper love. Everything beforehand had felt like practice for this.
The two of you had met in the spring term of sophomore year. The sun was shining and you we’re sitting on a blanket with Rico bouncing off ideas for research projects. You kept an eye on the baseball team who were practicing near the two of you. Rico was in the middle of explaining her ideas when a baseball flew in your direction.
“Heads up!” shouted a deep voice.
Both of you covered your heads as the ball flew over your blanket. The footsteps of one of the players was nearing your spot.
“Hey, I’m sorry about that.”
You tried to look up but the sun was blinding your eyes. You were able to make out the outline of a tall, man with broad shoulders and wavy blonde hair. He flashed a charismatic smile and said,“the name’s Jaeger. Zeke Jaeger.”
You introduced yourself and Zeke knelt down so his head was at your level.
“Nice to meet you. I feel about almost hitting you. Not sure what happened, normally I have perfect aim.” He winked at you. “Let me make it up by taking you out for a drink, your friend is more than welcomed to come.”
You blushed and thanked him and began to decline your offer when Rico interrupted you.
“She, I mean, we would love that. Here’s her number and mine, too.”
“Thanks, I’ll shoot y’all a text.”
Zeke stood up, grabbed the ball and gave you a wave before running back to his team. From that point on, the two of you had been inseparable.
You drifted off thinking about those first memories, the sweetness of his touch, the excitement of loving Zeke, the hopefulness you had. If you kept on thinking about those moments then maybe they would manifest back into your life. You wanted back that stability in your love so much it hurt your chest.
The next day you rolled over to an empty bed. Your hand traced the cold sheets and you kept your hands in the sunlight, the warmth felt good compared to the draft in Zeke’s bedroom. He preferred a colder bedroom, he said it was better for the body. The front door opened and you pretended to be asleep. Zeke’s footsteps got closer to the bed and you felt him press a kiss to your cheek, he smelled of sweat and musk. Who goes on a run after a night out? You thought. The showerhead turned on and you heard Zeke sing.
You got up and rummaged through Zeke’s drawer and pulled out a navy cardigan. You wrapped the fabric over your body and padded your way to the kitchen. The kitchen was colder than the bedroom.
“Fuck, who lives like this?”
You poured yourself water and stared at the tiles on the walls. Re-playing Levi’s comment in your head. Tsk, a friendship? We hardly know each other, I wouldn't push it. You didn’t blame Levi for his harshness but his comment hurt. There was no denying that you two shared a kinship that was a bit deeper than friendship. Romance wasn’t the word for it either. The relationship you had formed with him felt safe, you felt understood and respected in a way you haven’t really before. Your concentration was broken when you heard Zeke enter the kitchen.
“Hey, babe. Good morning.” He pressed a kiss to your temple. “I bought you a smoothie.”
“Thanks, Zeke,” you responded.
He grabbed the smoothie from the fridge and smiled at you. You sat on the counter and began to sip on the drink. Zeke hummed to himself and began to pull out a pan from the cupboard.
“Whatcha thinking about?” you asked.
“Like, the gameboard?” You joked.
He rolled his eyes. “Honestly, I’m thinking about last night. I never thought I was going to see those guys ever again.”
“Mmm, why did something happen?” You said nonchalantly.
Zeke chuckled, “stupid freshman things. We were all young and dumb.”
He stayed silent afterwards as he went on to fry some eggs. The eggs sizzled in the pan and he whistled quietly. You knew him well enough to know he wanted to say something else.
“I mean, I did dumb stuff when I was freshman so how bad can it actually be?” You prodded.
Zeke stared at you with a series expression. “Look (Y/N), I don’t really want to hash out what happened but-” he hesitated as he looked for the right words to say, “-be careful around Levi. There’s something off about that guy.”
“Oh,” you muttered.
You continued drinking the smoothie, the smell of the egg was making you nauseous and you started to feel the hanging over. You went back into the bedroom and laid down. Your phone buzzed and saw a text from Hange.
Hange: OMG i’m so hungover, i don’t remember getting home
You: Hange, WTF that’s not good lol but I know you were in good hands ;)
Hange: wut does that mean??
You: Moblit lol he was so nice and caring
Hange: … no comment but what are you doing
You: nothing really, why?
Hange: do you want to get brunch?
Hange: it’ll just be the two of us :)
You: yeah, i would love that, send me the address !
The smell of egg had entered the bedroom and you gagged. You hated the smell but Zeke insisted that it was the best way to get protein in the morning. You grabbed your belongings and walked to the kitchen again. Zeke was sitting at the counter eating the eggs and drinking his smoothie while reading the paper.
“Hey, I think I’m gonna head out!”
“Really? I thought we could spend the day together before I leave,” Zeke responded.
“You’re leaving?” You paused while putting on your shoes.
“I thought I told you. My internship is taking me on a trip for the next three days and then I’m heading home for the break,” Zeke said in between bites of food.
“Shit. You didn’t tell me. How about we hang out later today?”
“Yeah, I guess that sounds good to me. I’ll see you later,” he said.
“See ya.”
You went back to your apartment to freshen up and hurried to the diner Hange was it. You stepped through the doors and immediately saw Hange’s smiling face. They were waving you to their table. You greeted them with equal excitement and walked to them. For the past few weeks, some of your favorite moments have been hanging out with them. They always brightened your mood with their cheerful banter and love for life. You were excited to eat brunch with them and question them more about the history between the trio and your boyfriend.
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stiles-o-dylan24 · a year ago
From Work, With Love  Chapter 22 - From the Top
Author: @stiles-o-dylan24​​​   Pairing: Dylan O’Brien x Addison(Addy) Young   Word Count: 8212 Warnings: language, some angst again but also some long awaited fluff so buckle up babes💛 A/N: I know this is late and I’m sorry, internet has been going out all day and I lost my draft twice so, in conclusion, fuck 2020 bye
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Addy POV
Have you ever noticed that when you’re by your phone and it rings, the call seems to be never ending as you wait for the ringing to stop? Whereas if you’re nowhere near your phone and you rush to answer it, you almost always just miss it before you have the chance to answer it?
Seeing Dylan’s name and contact picture of him sticking his tongue out fill my screen, that’s exactly what’s happening right now. It seems like the call is going on forever as I chew on the side of my mouth debating if I should answer his call or not.
However, that same pit in my stomach that I’m going to miss the call if I don’t run towards it slams through me and I reach out before I can convince myself it’s not a good idea “Hello?”
“Hey Adds it’s me again- wait... you said- you said hello- holy shit you answered” he rushes out through his shock.
Fuck I’ve missed him.
I nod even though he can’t see me and reply softly “I did”
“Um, I- hi, I mean hey-” he coughs out an angry little breath, his agitation with stumbling over his words making the corners of my lips twitch “Jesus- I, uh, I’m sorry, I don’t actually know what to say right now.”
“But you called me” I mutter the obvious and there’s a pause before he clears his throat “Right, but I didn’t think you were going to answer.”
Can’t really blame him with that way of thinking. The airline was able to swap my ticket no problem once I got up to the counter and it was just by dumb luck that I got there when I did. There just so happened to be a flight that was leaving within the hour that would be bringing me into Heathrow just before noon the following day.
I had turned off my phone after sending the flight info to my parents before walking up to security. When I landed in Heathrow I turned my phone back on and ignored the 7 voicemails that were waiting so I could chat with Kaya and have the car sent for me take me to her flat.
On the drive I had stayed true to my word and let Dylan know that I had landed. I didn’t open the reply message and instead put my phone on do not disturb mode.
I didn’t sleep on the plane and was more than exhausted, especially with the jet lag coming on quickly, as soon as I made it to Kaya’s.
She was a saint and already had her guest room set up for me, blackout shades and everything. I was grateful that she was too swept up in being just as excited to see me that I was to see her and she didn’t catch on to my weird mood… or that the real reason behind my red puffy eyes was not because of the lack of sleep on the plane.
I had switched my phone back into disturb mode after we had some lunch and all of my notifications were like little red laser beams shining right in my eyes. After listening to 3 of the voicemails I couldn’t bring myself to listen to anymore or even read the texts he had sent.
And there was a lot.
Deciding that being mentally, emotionally and physically exhausted from the previous almost 24 hours probably meant I should call it a ridiculously early night and try again in the morning. So with it being barely a couple hours into the afternoon in jolly ol’ England- I showered quickly, changed into some jammies and was out as soon as my head hit the pillow.
That was yesterday.
I make a noise and pick at non-existent lint on my leggings “Did you want me to hang up so you could call back and say whatever you were going to say on the voicemail?”
“No,” he answers quickly and I can hear the nervousness in his voice, imagining him grimacing and scratching his forehead, when he continues “Now that I’m actually connected to you, I don’t ever want you to hang up if I’m being honest.”
I close my eyes with how sincere his words sound and he mistakes the reason for my silence “Sorry, I probably shouldn’t have said that.”
The pain in his voice has me opening my eyes and talking through the lump in my throat “Why did you call?”
Hearing him laugh, I shrink back in my chair because the sound has no joy behind it and I’m overcome instantly with an overwhelming need to fix it. Which is not fair since he did the breaking.
“Have you listened to my messages?” he asks and I move my shoulder with my confession “Not until this morning… where I listened to them all twice.”
And I did too. I started from the beginning with the ones I listened to yesterday, letting them play one after the other before I went back and listened to them all once more.
“You were able to ignore the bright red dots that drive you crazy on your apps for a whole day?” Something’s telling me he’s smiling as he asks that and I continue to stay in the bubble we’ve somehow created during this phone call “After I got here I ate and basically fell asleep”
He breathes out a little laugh that has me closing my eyes to bask in the comfort it brings along with the lightness to his voice as he says “Not surprised, you don’t handle jetlag very well”
I smile with that, despite everything, and hear him laugh once more “How early were you up this morning?”
Making a face at that, I roll my eyes “I will have you know I was up and wide awake at 4-a-m”
“I can’t believe London makes you an early bird” he chuckles out and I make a noise “Pft, early bird for one morning. I was up and had 2 cups of coffee before the fucking birds which means I’ll be able to go to bed in a couple hours and wake up at a normal time tomorrow… so technically I call that jetlagging correctly.”
“You make a great case,” he states and I can hear the smile in his voice, earning me to sit up a little higher and nod once “Thank you.”
He laughs, his next question following easily “Where are you staying?”
Drumming my fingers on the table I go around answering his question the way he actually meant it “I’m going to be staying in a trailer on the studio lot minus two weeks at some point where we’re going to be staying in these little cottages they’ve rented out in the English countryside.”
He makes a little noise of confirmation before he clarifies hesitantly “But where are you staying... right now?”
I don’t answer right away and he chuckles, covering the sadness to his next words “If you really don’t want to tell me you don’t have to… I’m only asking because I love you and selfishly I just need to know you’re safe.”
Nodding with that, I shrug and answer quickly “I’m safe.”
“Adds-” he trails off, even though it’s clear he wants to push the subject- which the fact that I’m able to sense that in the words he didn’t say paired with hearing the desperation in his voice... and I cave. I take a few seconds though before I’m breathing out “I’m with Kaya.”
“That makes me feel a lot better than imagining you alone in a hotel” he breathes out and I can feel the relief coming off him from here.
Sitting up a bit more, I make a noise “Oi, I would have been just fine alone in a hotel though wouldn’t I?”
“Your accent is insanely strong right now” he chuckles and I roll my eyes, the corners of my mouth quirking up “Well the whole film is going to be done with British accents so might as well get a jump start on my rusty accent”
“Your accent is far from rusty- it’s been coming through more and more since Scorch, so being around Kaya I’m sure is going to help even more too- well probably too much.”
I snort with that, my next words just falling out like nothing’s changed “Right, a bit inappropriate for Belle to call someone a fucking wanker innit?”
He laughs loudly, the sudden noise causing a full blown smile to spread across my face.
Yup definitely fucking miss him.
When his laugh dies down, he chuckles once more “As spot on as that was I think Disney might be a bit upset if their new princess said that.”
There’s a pause, an almost awkward pause as we both seem to realise how easy we were able to forget everything that happened and was said two nights ago- how easy we were able to fall right back into us.
Dylan clears his throat and answers my question from earlier “I called because like I said in my last message to you, until you tell me to back off or leave you alone- I’m not going to stop taking every chance I can to tell you that I love you and will do whatever it takes not to lose you.”
I don’t say anything to that, partly because I have no idea what to say to that. This phone call has been equally exactly what I needed but also a little overwhelming. He’s saying all the right things right now so it should be a no brainer to just say forgive and move on.
I still feel hurt though and I’m not sure how much can be healed or forgiven in just a little over a day and a half.
It’s not even that I want to punish him for a certain amount of time… I just have to be sure enough that when he says this won’t happen again that he means it.
Because I won’t ever be made to feel like I did the other night.
“I was a level of idiot I didn’t even think was possible” he states and I smile sadly with that, my voice soft with my reply “That’s a bit accurate.”
I barely hear him chuckle before he clears his throat “I think I’ve driven the point far enough home that I’m sorry, because I truly am, but I also know it means fuck all until I actually show you. I just- I just want you to know that I mean it all, Adds.”
I pull his voice closer to my ear as I nod slowly, my eyes moving to the window beside me and seeing the sunset that will soon be on the horizon “I know you do.”
“I love you” he mutters lowly, almost like he’s not sure if he should be saying that and that thought just makes my heart hurt in a different way.
Bringing my feet up onto the edge of the chair, I slump back in my chair and pull my phone closer to my mouth as I match his previous tone “I love you.”
He breathes in deeply with my words, his voice a soft whisper a moment later “Well if nothing else, at least you still love me.”
I smile sadly with that, not missing a beat to reassure him “Of course I love you Dyl. I’m upset but that doesn’t mean I stopped loving you.”
Dylan POV
Having to hang up the phone with Addy after finally hearing her voice in what felt like forever is basically what I can compare getting hit in the balls to feel like.
Is there a better analogy to use? Probably, but I don’t really care. It hurt and sucked and that’s all you need to know.
She needed to end the call that was only 15 minutes long and easily the happiest I’ve been in days. She needed to go- needed to go to her appointment at the salon before figuring out what she was eating for dinner.
A seemingly normal reason for needing to end the call and yet I can’t help but feeling like maybe that wasn’t the only reason. There was a moment where we were ourselves. Our easy way of talking we have had since the moment I met her.
It was a moment where I wasn’t terrified I was going to say the wrong thing and she was going to hang up on me. She was joking and laughing with me, being her witty and charming little self as she talked to me about her day.
I know she realized it at the same time I did... and I think it was too much too soon for her.
I fucked up the other night.
I know that.
I also know that you know that so I don’t need to reiterate that it was the stupidest thing I could have ever done.
But this also isn’t the end. She may not have given me a definitive answer when I asked if I lost her- but she didn’t say yes, so there’s still hope. And I’m going to hold on to that hope for as long as I can... I’m going to make this right.
Addy POV
Kaya has been finishing up on her show so I don’t see much of her the next couple of days. Though we usually will have some form of breakfast together since Dylan wasn’t far off and London does make me an early bird- not 4 in the morning early but still.
Tonight’s my last night here with her before I’m heading off to the set they’ve been building at Shepperton studios. I just got changed from having a shower and I’m scrunch drying my hair with one of my shirts when Kaya scares the bejeezus out of me as I walk out of the bathroom.
I let out a little shriek and jump back, hearing her laugh loudly “Dylan was right, you’re a riot when you get scared.”
Glaring at her I bend forward and grab the shirt I dropped “Hilarious- what the fuck are you doing back so early?”
“Early night since you’re leaving in the morning” she answers with a bright smile while also completely failing at keeping her laugh at bay.
I resume the shirt drying of my hair and she tilts her head to the side “Why are you using a shirt to do that?” 
“Towels are too harsh on your hair” I answer simply and she makes a face “Where has that bit of useful information been all my life?”
I laugh and shrug before walking over and hanging the shirt over the back of a chair to dry “One of the hair ladies I’ve had on teen wolf since the beginning told me about it”
Kaya makes a little contemplative noise as she nods her head with her words “Well you have gorgeous hair even with all the dyeing you’ve been doing lately so I’m going to have to try that”
I smile in thanks at her, seeing her open her mouth before shutting it quickly. I raise a brow and nod towards her “What’s up?”
“Nothing” she answers much too quickly and I know in my gut that someone has gotten in contact with her. I drop my eyes down to my hands that I’m holding out in front of my chest, my attention fully on moving the pads of my thumbs over the edge of my nails “What’s he said?”
“Something has happened between you two then?” she questions immediately and I take a second before I nod ever so slightly.
She groans, the loud sound in the otherwise quiet of the room drawing my attention back over to see that she’s flopped backwards on the bed with her hands on her face.
A few seconds later she sits up quickly, immediately throwing her arms out to her sides “You’ve been here a bloody week Addy why haven’t you said anything?”
I open my mouth to explain, though only a noise comes through, before I huff and shake my head honestly “It’s been ages since I’ve seen you and I wanted to enjoy our visit, not turn the whole week down bummer lane with my relationship drama.”
“So scheduling was utter bullshit, this is the real reason why you’re here a week early?” she wonders her non question out loud, though I still nod and she softens her face towards me “Go on then, what’s happened?”
I chew on my lip and tug the sleeves of my henley down from my elbows, pulling the edges over my hands, as my feet bring me over to the bed where she’s sitting.
I cross my arms over my chest and sit down beside her, bringing my legs up into a pretzel like hers before I fill her in on everything.
After I finish summarizing what transpired almost a week ago, and the few text and phone conversations from the past couple of days, Kaya snaps her mouth closed and I watch as a glare transforms on her face “I’ll kill him.”
“You don’t need to kill him,” I laugh gently, though she’s already shaking her head “Yes I do. He finally has you, the love of his fucking life, and he goes and pulls this? Lets his insecurities and fuck all else smash right into you both all because deep down he can’t accept something this good happening to him- so man logic means he’s got to sabotage it?”
“Basically” I whisper out and she snaps her head in my direction once more “Like I said I’ll kill him.”
Shaking my head, I keep my eyes down on my hands that are in my lap “This is why I wanted to keep it quiet. Basically all my friends are his friends also, some were even his first,” I look at her with that before I drop my eyes once more and continue “And I don’t want anyone to have to be put in that kind of situation while I figure everything out.”
“I’m your fucking friend babe and I’m choosing your side over that wanker,” she snaps back and I smile at her, laughing once as I breathe out “That’s exactly the situation I’m talking about.”
She just throws me a look and shrugs like she could not care less “My choice though innit? I’m deciding to vocally choose your side right now. You don’t want to tell anyone about what happened? Right, that’s fine- no one else has to know. However, you deserve to have someone on your side right now that you can talk to with you feeling the way I can only imagine you’re feeling. What you just told me, you’ve been keeping that all bottled up this whole time and you probably have no idea how much you needed to say all of that. You don’t need to go through this alone and fuck right off, yeah, if you think I’m going to let you.”
Tears that I have been holding at bay for days rush to my eyes as I try to find the words to adequately tell her how thankful I am for her.
She let me stay with her for a whole week, no questions asked. She has been here for me through this entire ordeal and she wasn’t even aware of how much she was doing for me until tonight.
Thankfully she’s the kind of friend who can see all of that written on my face and she makes a noise. Uncrossing her pretzel legs and scooting over on the edge of the bed, she sits right beside me and wraps her arms around me.
The second she hugs me and I lay the side of my head on her shoulder- I break.
All the tears I’ve not been able to cry since I got here release in a floodgate and she hugs me through it all.
Addy POV
Bringing one of my most favourite princesses to life has been nothing short of a fairytale dream and I’m only 5 days in.
Dan and I have mainly been filming a few of the library scenes and the getup he has to wear has definitely taken some getting used to for the both of us- though without question he’s had the harder part of the learning curve.
He has to be in this 40 pound suit as he attempts to walk on stilts, however, it allows him to be in the scene with me to which I’m very grateful for. We already have interesting markers to look at when we’re talking to any of the other enchanted characters, so I couldn’t imagine if he couldn’t be in the scene with me as well. Won’t lie that it’s a bit difficult to not be distracted by the contraption he’s wearing though.
I have just gotten through filming the scenes in the room before and after where Belle refuses to go to dinner, getting through it surprisingly quickly since I was technically the only one in the room. It took me two takes for the markers to be exactly where I should be looking, but eventually it was exactly what Bill was wanting and we ran through it a couple times.
We call it a night and after thanking the crew and everyone around me, I turn on my heel and head towards the doors that will take me to the side of the lot where the trailers are.
Thankfully I will be wearing what I am right now for the scene in the morning so I don’t have to head to wardrobe and can go straight to my place, calling it a night as soon as I’m changed.
I reach out and push against the handlebar to open the door, my feet immediately stopping the second I’m through the doorway and almost crash into someone “You dyed your hair again.”
“Dylan” I barely whisper and he lifts one corner of his mouth, his eyes locked on mine “Hey, Adds.”
“What-” I start to say, the rest of my words dying in my throat when he continues “You look breathtakingly beautiful.”
“How-” I trail off, not able to bring myself to finish my question and he just smiles nervously “You didn’t tell your mom that she should hate me… so between her and Mel, I was able to get a visit to come on set to see you.”
I’m kind of speechless with that, my stupid heart swooning at the fact that he’s here right now- went to this extreme to show up here.
In fucking London.
When he’s definitely supposed to be on his own set right now.
Since I’m not saying anything, he lets his nerves stay front and center as he hesitantly questions “Why, um… why didn’t you tell her she should hate me?”
I look away from him and down the lot, seeing everyone making their way to wardrobe and various other end of the day check in spots. Chewing on the inside of my cheek I breathe in deeply and look back at him, releasing my breath around my reply “Because she shouldn’t hate you.”
“No?” he questions with a hopeful glint in his eye and I’m right there with my caught off guard, petty crown on to keep him on his toes “Well we still have to finish Teen Wolf and Maze Runner, so wouldn’t really be ideal for her to hate you with all the press tours would it?”
“Right…” he deflates and nods a little, looking from the ground and back up to me “Is that the only reason she shouldn’t hate me?”
Shaking my head at him I try to keep the sass out of my next question “What are you doing here?”
He looks a little taken back by that, his brows raising immediately “You really expected me to not come after you? I told you, Adds I was going to prove to you that I deserve you and I wasn’t going to stop at daily phone calls.”
I ponder that for a few seconds before I shake my head softly “No, but I actually mean what are you doing here? You’re supposed to be filming.”
“I had a break” he answers simply and I narrow my eyes in thought at him “How long of one?”
“Just over a week-” he shrugs and looks to the side as a small group of assistants walks by. They see me and wave, which I return with a polite smile and wave back as Dylan turns his back with them so he’s facing me more.
Once they’re past us I look back over at Dylan. Seeing his nervous smile and actually feeling his on edge energy kick up a notch, I roll my eyes and nod my head forward “Come on”
“You kicking me off set already?” he asks jokingly and steps after me, though I can hear the not so subtle fear in his voice that those words are true.
Even though I want to answer back snarky, I can’t. He’s put himself out there in a way I always have hoped someone would do for me one day and I don’t want him to think I’m not appreciative of that.
He’s following me- but not exactly walking right beside me- so I look over my shoulder at him, until he looks at me, and then I’m facing forward once more “You came all this way so least I could do is hear you out before that happens- plus privacy is probably better.”
He doesn’t respond with that opting to make a noise instead, that could pass as an agreed little grunt, while he follows me to my trailer.
Once we’re inside, I close the door and cross my arms over my chest before I turn around and face him. He’s leaning his back against the side counter and if I didn’t think about it, this would be any other night in my trailer. Just the two of us getting ready to practice lines or spend the rest of the evening being lazy and snuggling in bed while trying to catch up on the never ending Netflix queue we have.
Shaking my head from those thoughts, I clear my throat and move to the back, muttering about changing real quick.
Once I’m in a black long sleeve henley and some heather grey leggings I head back out and ask him to fill me in on why he has just over a week of a break to come here.
Dylan reaches his hand up and scratches just under his jaw, the action bringing attention to the stubble he has grown out for the role and fuck him if it doesn’t make me feel some type of way, while he shrugs his other shoulder “Something wasn’t quite done on the rig and they needed more time to fix it, so they changed the schedule for this week. I’m not in any of the scenes they’re filming so I asked if I could come and see you. Marky Mark is a big softie and helped me put it all together to work best with scheduling.”
“Dylan-” I start to say but stop myself because I’m not even sure I know what I want to say to that, however, it doesn’t matter because he doesn’t give me a chance to keep going. He’s pushing off from the counter and taking a step towards me while he rushes out “Please don’t tell me that I shouldn’t be here, okay? I know I fucked up Adds- I knew it the second you gave me the phone back.”
He drops his eyes for a second, looking to the ground while he scratches near his temple  “Which I know probably means that the level to which I fucked up has its own predetermined amount of time until you want to see me in person,” he brings his eyes back up to connect with mine “But I just- I needed to see you. I needed you to see the sincerity on my face when I told you that if you give me another chance I will show you everyday that what happened the other night will never happen again.”
“How are you so sure it won’t happen again?” I ask immediately because while that’s been what he’s been saying everyday, I still don’t get why he’s so sure in saying that right now.
He scoffs, his tone a little lighter as he states easily “I literally called the one girl on this planet who cannot lie a fucking liar- like an actual douchebag I threw around those words.”
Drawing my brows inwards I barely tilt my head to the side, huffing out a breath because that is not good enough.
The small amount of humor on his face clears and he lifts his shoulders up in a desperate, pleading shrug “In all seriousness... because I have spent the last almost 2 weeks without you in my life. We may still be together and we’re both in different countries to film, but this isn’t like any other work distance from you- this is different and not to be dramatic or anything but it’s been an actual hellish nightmare.”
The corners of my lips twitch with that and I keep quiet while he continues “Adds, you are not just my girlfriend- you are my best friend. Everything reminds me of you and if it doesn’t I immediately want to share it with you so you can enjoy it with me- and I haven’t been able to do that. For the last 5 years my day has never been complete until I got to hear how your day went, and that was true both for when we were working together or a part and we haven’t had those chats lately. We’ve only talked on the phone once and our text conversations are different and I get why- honestly I do. I just... if this is my glimpse at losing you, I know I will never let this kind of bullshit happen again.”
It’s silent while I process everything he just said and he takes the opportunity to say one more thing “You’re it for me, Adds- you’re the girl. You are the only girl for me, so please just give me a chance and let me fix this.”
I’m immediately on the defense with that and I scoff lightly “Yeah and I said you were the only guy for me yet that wasn’t good enough for you and you still thought-”
“No, okay-” he interrupts, shaking his head while keeping his unwavering eyes connected to mine “I know what you’re going to say and no, I never thought you cheated on me.”
I roll my eyes with that, cursing the painful tingling in my nose signaling tears want to enter the chat, and I laugh humorlessly once “No, right- you just thought I was lying about who I was hanging out with which somehow is worse than if you were to have accused me of cheating on you.”
Hearing my exact words I make a face, my hand moving in a circle as I work through it all and rush out “I also know that that probably doesn’t make any sense but here we are.”
He smiles in that gentle way when I’m doing something ridiculous, his eyes slowly moving over my face as he proves he’s my fucking person “It makes perfect sense because then if I had accused you of that blasphemy at least you could have laughed in my face... because we both know you would never cheat on me..”
I make a noise like you’re fucking right I wouldn’t and throw my hand towards him in my agreement because yes that was exactly where I was going.
“Just like I would never cheat on you, baby” he whispers and my eyes snap up to his. I fail at holding them back and the betraying tears invade my vision, making his sincere face in front of me blurry.
Reaching up I wipe my eyes with the sleeves of my shirt and nod with his statement because I do wholeheartedly believe him when he says that.
“I made a mistake, Adds- one I will gladly go the rest of my life never making again,” he declares and I softly scoff, crossing my arms over my chest as I look at the floor between us.
He makes a noise with my visible wall going up and when I look back up to him he throws his arms out to his sides “Jesus, I just- I mean I’m 23 and a fucking idiot can I please be allowed to make one mistake?”
Throwing him a look I shake my head once “Of course you’re allowed to make a mistake and learn from that mistake. That’s the whole point of life is to make mistakes so you can grow and learn and become a better human being. You’re going to make a lot more mistakes than just this one too, Dyl, and as long as you grow from them, learn the fucking lesson attached to that mistake, then that’s all that matters.”
He starts to nod his head, though I keep going because I wasn’t done “However, when your mistake also directly involves and deeply hurts another person- that person is allowed to be upset... which I am, and that’s not just going to go away immediately because you acknowledged you fucked up.”
“Fuck Adds, I know you’re upset- I know I deeply hurt you and that’s why I just want to know how I can fix it” he counters, the broken desperation in his voice even more apparent in person than when we talked on the phone last week.
I soften my face and shrug “Am I not allowed to take a bit of time to sort through everything that you made me feel? Work through all of it in the best way possible for me so that I don’t hold on to unnecessary anger that I never let go of which will undoubtedly hurt us in the long run?”
Jamming his tongue into his cheek he breathes out a harsh breath, his voice softer as he concedes “Well yeah when you put it like that of course that’s what you should do.”
“Great so that’s what I’ve been doing” I uncross my arms and drop them down to my sides as I laugh once “Do you really think I’ve enjoyed the past two weeks? That I also haven’t been missing you and wanting to tell you about everything going on with this amazing film I’m ridiculously excited to be making. The phenomenal people I’m getting to work with and the wardrobe I’m getting to wear while I sing these beautiful songs in front of actual people? That I haven’t equally been wanting to hear about you and the set you’re on, working with who you’re working with while you’re bringing to life and telling the devastating story of incredible survivors?”
He visibly swallows, his eyes looking even sadder the more I spoke. He looks like he may want to chime in but he got to say his peace and I need to keep going “You hurt me with the things you said but more than that I’m mad at you for also taking away us from me. You took away the ease of our friendship that has always been here when something upsets me. You made it so I couldn’t confide in you with what happened because you did the hurting.”
I’m crying at this point but for once in this fight I don’t care. I pushed them back because I wanted to be strong last time but all the hurt is front and center now and he needs to see that.
His brows are drawn in, single handedly completing the absolutely broken look on his face and it further cracks my heart. He moves forward slightly, the move an almost twitch like he’s fighting with himself to come to me, and that just makes me cry even more.
Hating everything about this, I sniffle once and keep going “I love you so much that I’m mad at you because the fact that I love you makes me want to instantly forget everything that was said or that happened because you’re still the only one I want to confide in right now.”
I make a hiccup of a sob noise deep in my chest as I reach up and place my sleeve covered palms on my eyes. I take a second before I groan and drop my arms back down to my sides, connecting my watery eyes with his “Because even though you hurt me and I’m mad at you for how you handled this whole situation- you’re still the only one I want to comfort me and hug me while you continue to say all the right things that you’ve been saying for weeks.”
That’s all it takes and he’s closing the gap between us, one arm around my waist and pulling me into his chest while the other grabs the back of my head and holds me to him.
The second my face hits his chest another sob cracks my throat and I wrap my arms around his middle, feeling him hold me even tighter against him.
Breathing in his chest brings another wave of soft cries to me because I’ve missed him so much. His smell, the way his arms fit and completely wrap around me, the way every involuntary sad noise I make causes him to pull me impossibly closer against him, the overwhelming yet comforting feeling of feeling so safe that literally nothing could hurt me right now- just him.
I have missed all of it... all of him.
One more content noise, that’s borderline a whimper, from me and Dyl increases his hold around me, his fingers moving gently against my head where he’s still holding me to him. 
I squeeze my arms around him a little more when I feel him press his lips to my temple, leaving them there for a second longer before he lays his cheek against the side of my head.
We stay like that for I don’t even know how long, the silence turning comfortable once more for the first time in weeks. 
It’s a couple minutes later when Dylan breaks the silence, though his soft words tell me he doesn’t want to break the little cocoon we’re in right now “You ready to give me a definite answer yet, Blondie?”
My heart swells at the nickname I haven’t heard in far too long and I sniffle once, not letting up on the hold I have around him “Definite answer to which question?”
He takes a moment before his fingers press into me with his barely whispered question “Did I fuck this all up and lose you?”
“Is that you subtly asking if we’re officially on a break or not?” I can’t help but ask, letting go to step a few steps back from him. He reluctantly let me move away from him, the hesitance in his hold on me apparent when I stepped out of his arms. 
His eyes had dropped to my feet, seeming to measure the new distance between us, however as soon as my words register to him he snaps his eyes back up to connect with mine “No it’s me asking exactly what I am because I need to know if I need to keep the tame fighting for you to give me another chance plan or if I need to up the ante and bring out the big guns fighting to get you back after a break up plan.”
“I didn’t break up with you” I clarify barely above a whisper and he softens his face, nodding towards me ever so slightly “You also haven’t answered if I’ve lost you... because if I’ve already lost you and you’re just not saying it yet then that means the break up is coming as soon as you’re ready to say the words.”
I don’t answer him right away, taking the silence of the space around us that he’s giving me to really come to terms with what I’ve known since the moment I left the hotel that night.
Clearing my throat I lay everything that I’ve come to the conclusion of these last few weeks all out in front of us “You’re so worried that you’re going to lose me that the way you handle situations is eventually going to do just that. You are subconsciously letting your jealousy push me away to save yourself from the heartache you think is inevitable of someone else coming along and taking me away from you. In what I think is your own self preservation tactic- if you push me far enough away first then it won’t hurt as badly.”
“I wasn't trying to push you away” he states without missing a beat and I smile sadly “I know, but how you have treated past situations with anyone of the male species connected to me was slowly doing that,” he looks down briefly, nodding before he looks at me again and I keep going “I wasn’t even aware it was happening until I was on the plane and looking back at everything. Being my boyfriend meant that you needed to trust me, in any situation but especially the business we’re in and you weren’t doing that. You were inadvertently already thinking that I’m one step out the door and that wasn’t fair- what you did the other night was not fair...”
He brings his hands out in front of him, pressing his thumb of one hand into the space between his thumb and forefinger of the other. He does that a few times, alternating between each hand in a move I’ve only seen him do before interviews.
He’s nervous.
Slowly I move my eyes up from his hands and hesitantly connect my eyes with his. I see the nerves in his gaze as well, but I also see the deep love he’s always had for me... and that’s all it takes.
Letting go of the hold my teeth had on the inside of my cheek, I take a deep breath in and slowly release it “But you didn’t lose me.”
“What was that?” he looks at me, tilting his head to the side like he didn’t hear me correctly. I, however, see the hope dancing in his eyes and I smile softly, shaking my head every so slightly “I said you didn’t lose me.”
He closes his eyes with my words, his mouth lifting into a hesitant smile as he processes my words. When he opens his eyes again he takes the few steps that were separating us until he’s standing right in front of me.
Reaching his arm up he places his palm on the side of my face, his fingers gently resting on the side of my neck. His eyes are locked on mine and he licks his lips before his soft whisper of a voice fills the small space between us “One more time, baby girl.”
I set my hand on his outstretched arm and barely whisper loud enough “You never lost me, Dyl.”
Not even half a second after I say his name and he’s leaning forward, effectively capturing my lips with his in a searing hot kiss. I push up on my toes and wrap my arms behind his neck, feeling his wrap around my waist with his hands flat against my back.
We may have seen each other 2 weeks ago but I haven't actually felt his lips on mine in just over 2 months... and let me tell you, he’s definitely remembering that little fact right now with the way he’s pulling me against him. 
Both of his hands grip onto either side of my waist, his fingers pressing into my skin while he gently pushes me back against the counter.
He swipes his tongue along mine- the action drawing out an involuntary moan, that I try to keep quiet, from me at the same time he’s reaching up and gently placing his palms against my cheeks. 
One more series of a few quick kisses before he pulls away just enough to place his forehead on mine. 
I keep my eyes closed for a second longer and when I open them I see his are still closed, his dark lashes slightly moving against the top of his cheek. He runs his tongue along his bottom lip, the movement drawing a small smile from me before I bite the side of my lip. 
Like he can sense me unabashedly staring at him, and his ridiculously beautiful face, he opens his eyes. He smiles the second he sees me looking right at him, the corners of his eyes crinkling.
He slowly moves his thumb against my cheek, removing his hand to run his fingers through my hair from ear down to the ends “I know it’s going to take time to show you but I promise the jealous Tarzan bullshit is done.”
I smile with that, lifting my shoulders a little “Don’t get me wrong, your Tarzan side can be hot because I can usually just climb on your lap and kiss away the worries you have,” he smiles with that before my face takes on a more serious note and I keep going “It’s not hot though when you take it to the level you did the other night.”
Dyl moves his eyes between mine, his hold on me increasing just slightly as he probably prepares for me to step back again. I don’t though and instead hug him to me a little more “What happened the other night is exactly how you will lose me if the bullshit isn’t done because I can’t do this again, Dyl. You should be able to hear me saying why in the fuck would I want anyone else when I have you just once and believe it.” 
“I do believe it” he agrees instantly and I nod once “That also means I won’t lie to you about who I’m with, no matter what, because no one is worth lying about since I have you.”
He runs his nose along mine, his arms tightening around my back once more “I learned the hardest lesson 2 weeks ago, trust me when I say I believe you.”
“I love you” I whisper and he smiles before he picks me up, sets me on the counter behind me and kisses me in between his next words “You- have- no- fucking- idea-” with one more longer kiss before he pulls back and I laugh, seeing him moving his eyes all over my face “I love you, Adds.”
 I wrap my legs around his waist, causing him to step into me a little more as I cross my ankles behind him. His hands are on my waist and I move my fingers through the hair just above his neck, hearing him groan in approval. 
I smile brightly as I ask hopefully “This means you’re staying with me tonight, right?”
“Adds I’m with you until you kick me out or 10 days is up, whichever comes first” he clarifies immediately and I laugh, tilting my head to the side at the thought that comes to me “Wait, where’s your stuff?”
He takes a second before he admits a little sheepishly “I didn’t bring anything” 
“You didn’t- you didn’t bring anything... not even a carry on?” I repeat and he shakes his head “Not even a carry on.”
I chuckle with that and narrow my eyes in thought “You probably looked insane.”
“I could have just been one of those people who checked a bag” he argues, mock offended and I just raise a brow “Those people still usually always have some type of carry on bag.”
His face falls a little before he shrugs “Adds, for all I knew I wouldn’t even be allowed on set when you saw me and I was going to have to fly out on the next flight available.”
My heart hurts a little with that, though it’s lessened some by the healing we’ve already started. I make a face and question further “Wait a minute- so you didn’t even bring your pillow?”
His lips twitch at the corners at the same time he’s shaking his head once more “Not even the pillow made the trek this time.”
I jerk my head back with that, squeezing my arms around him “But you don’t travel anywhere without your pillow, no matter how short the trip is...”
“I know” he smiles and I throw him a look as I quip “You’ve always said that it’s there for you on the plane if nothing else.”
Dyl just laughs and with his hands still on my waist pulls me into him a little more “Baby, I don’t need my pillow if I have you.”
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A/N: Thanks so much for reading! As always let me know what you thought– comments & reblogs give me life and keep me motivated to write more! 
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Posted 20 December 2020
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