@lokitheliesmith {{xx}}
The question stuck to her tongue and weighing it down of course must be how had Loki come to be like this? But no matter how she turns it over in her mind, she can't seem to manage to get it out and into the open air. A second whisper in the recesses of her thoughts asks why it matters? Would it change the way she feels? How she would treat him? A resounding 'no' comes to the forefront. Absolutely not. Unlike most people who surround him, she is not fickle. Her loyalty ironclad and obvious.
"Shh-shh," she murmurs as she draws her thumb across his brow, from inward out toward his hair. Her mana manifests itself, if he could see it, as the of the green growing earth and the clouded horizon of the sea at sunset. Flickers of green and gold and purple as the wound draws back his blood and seals itself. She bespells him with numbness of flesh and renewal, gifting him in part her own ability to heal faster than humanly ~or even preternaturally~ possible.
What remains is the blood that is not his own, nor hers as she's no need of making an offering. But whose, then? If it were anyone else, she might be inclined to taste it, but as delicate as the situation is, she isn't going to put him further on edge.
This would be the moment Andy would press a kiss to whatever tear-accompanied wound she would present him. She restrains herself only enough to ensure that kiss only lands may-fly brief against his brow.
"You will be alright, milimili." Next she abandons him wholly to wring a damp cloth in lukewarm water before she takes one of his hands. She is meticulous as ever in ensuring not a trace of red remains on his elegant fingers. Her motions remain gentle, speaking to him all the things she does not say.
"Gonna hazard a guess an' say ~regrettably~ Stark still alive?"
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Milimili
When I recall a dream I once had when I was eleven years old, the memories send me sharp visuals of a nature setting and a tent I was camping in. I was not alone. The most powerful memory of this dream was that I was with someone I loved, with someone who loved me back. The warmth, acceptance, clarity, realness, alignment I was left with when I awoke was quite overwhelming. Nascent, adolescent, unfamiliar emotions that lingered with me intensely for the first few minutes after I awoke, and I remember forcing myself to evoke the feelings throughout the day to lessen the dissipation of the magnitude of the dream. I have believed since that day that I would find this person.
Another memory quite fresh in my mind is the day my brothers left for boarding school, the excitement they wore on their faces, the excitement I felt for them, and for myself, knowing that within a solitary year I too would feel such elation as it would be my turn to head off to the mountains, to the snow and to the outdoor adventures we three brothers had heard so much about from our older sisters (who themselves had already experienced the thrill of heading away to this particular boarding school). Turns out it would be another two years before I was sent, as my father could not afford to send five children all at once to various boarding schools in the United States. So I stayed in the Bahamas while all my siblings left.
In our father’s house I watched them pack, feeding off of their excited anticipation, wishing I too could go with them. When it came time for them to leave I watched them drive off with my father, who was to fly them in his single engine six-seater Piper Cherokee to, most likely, Fort Lauderdale, where they’d begin their journey north to Lake Placid, New York.
The instance they drove away my heart sank. I never imagined I would feel so alone without my brothers. I felt a panic rise within me, an emptiness that gripped me tightly. Suddenly the yard where we played countless games of football, built forts, and played war games seemed oddly quiet, baren, hollow. The canal at the back of our house became a frigid black-hole, one I could never imagine I’d be brave enough to jump into without my brothers being there with me. I ran to the chicken coop at the back of the yard with tears welling up.
I was no foreigner to this emptiness feeling. I grew up with the challenge of battling this emptiness everytime I left my mother's home to return to my father’s. They divorced when I was three years old and for whatever reason my father took primary custody over my brother Tomas and I. Spending holidays and vacations with my mother was never enough for me. I longed for her, pined for her tender affections and the ever-present immensity of her love. Thirteen years is all the time I had with her, and though so brief of a time the impact has been immeasurable.
I sat with the chickens for a time and cried in solitude. Returning to my father’s home after spending a loving time with my mother was always difficult for me, and I learned to cope by crying in solitude once I knew my brothers were asleep and could not hear me sobbing through the night. Cold, alone, sad, wanting desperately to be back in the loving arms of my mother, or even just to be within the proximity of her loving radiance would have been enough to soothe me. But she was far away, on another island.
I always cried when my brother and I said goodbye to our mother at the airport heading back to our father’s; and, as the plane would begin to taxi to the runway, I would desperately scour the airport window panes looking for her big, familiar, kind smile. Finding her, my tears would flow, and I’d cry with my face glued to her until her visage vanished. My brave brother never cried. He comforted me as best he could, but I found no comfort ever in leaving her, only angst and despair. I believed then, as I do now, that I belonged with my mother. I loved my father very much, but the simple truth is he did not and could not provide me with the care, affection and attention I both craved and needed. Not once can I recall my father demonstrating an understanding of the hardships I went through each time I left my mother. Never did he recognize the pain it must have caused to such a young and sensitive boy as me. I imagine had he taken me in his arms and hugged me and talked softly to me that I would have fared better, been less distressed.
Perhaps this was meant to be in order to prepare me for the early death of my mother.
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