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spaceskam · 4 years

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for @alexmanesappreciation weekend. technically falls under day 1 despite it being day 2 but what can you do. Heavily inspired by You & I from Bare: A Pop Opera, so high school au!

Alex was minding his own damn business, getting his books out of his locker when town arms snaked around his torso and hot breath hit his ear.

"Hey, stranger," Michael Guerin whispered, nipping at his skin as he pressed his hands into his lower stomach. Alex gulped softly and tried to fight his grin. A quick look around the hall proved they were alone–which made sense. Michael had a reputation. "What's a man gotta do to get you alone? Toys? A puppy?" He paused and pressed his hips hard into Alex's back, making his want for him known. "How about a lollipop?"

Alex laughed, squirming in grasp at the gross analogy. He managed to turn around and Michael's half-lidded eyes were fully on him, unphased and not checking the halls for others. Alex's felt a rush of adrenaline.

"No thanks. Stranger danger," he retorted. Michael's eyes flickered around his face, leaning even closer so their foreheads met and Alex was pinned between his body and the lockers.

"So a kiss is out of the question?" Michael breathed. Again, he didn't check for bystanders. Alex was giddy.

"Well, when you say it like that..."

He leaned in, barely getting to enjoy his lips for a millisecond before footsteps sounded and Michael spun, his back hitting the locker beside Alex's. Alex sighed and saw a couple other students entering the hallway they were in before turning back into his locker. He should've known that was too good to be true.

"So, where were you last night? I waited up," Alex said, soft enough no one could really hear as he went back to looking through his locker.

"Couldn't get away early enough," he said.

Alex frowned. There were things that came with being apart of a religious private school, one of them was usually having ridiculously strict parents. Michael, however, got the worst of them all whenever one of the big shots in the town's church decided to loudly announce how good they were by fostering a teen boy with "problems". So far, the only problem Alex had found in Michael Guerin was that he was starved of affection and could be reduced to a useless pile of boy with the right amount of heavy petting.

"Oh," Alex said, trying not to make him feel guilty.

"We're forever damned to loneliness, aren't we?" Michael sighed, playing up the dramatics but Alex's saw how much he really felt that. Still, he didn't want to call him out, so he smiled.

"I stayed awake as long as I could. Got about 2 hours of sleep," Alex told him. Michael's eyes scanned the freshly empty halls again before giving him a fond smile.

"Impressive," he said, slowly sliding closer again. He was so close, but not close enough. "What'd you say we skip? Go find somewhere... Catch up on sleep?"

"Oh?" Alex hummed, intrigued and showing it. Michael smiled that pretty little smile of his, lips pressing to his cheek.

"Should I bring that lollipop I mentioned?"

Alex huffed a laugh, but turned to meet his lips.

"I think you should."

And then the bell rang and the halls filled with people.

Again, Michael pulled away and Alex prepared to be upset. He didn’t like the person he was whenever he was being the perfect, all-star football player that his foster parents wanted. He liked the sweet dork he got when they were alone. But, God forbid...

“Manes, you got my homework?” Kyle Valenti said as he sidled up beside Michael. They were bros. How gross was that?

“Uh, fuck off, Valenti, mine takes precedence,” Michael told him, elbowing him. Alex didn’t entertain them as they started to play fight in the halls, pulling out two copies of the Calc homework. Technically, Michael had done all the work and Alex was just the face of the business. They split the profits.

“$15,” Alex said blandly, accepting as they both paid up. It was a always a show for Michael. He had to wonder if that’s all they’d ever be. A secret layer beneath this one.

“Thanks,” Kyle said before clapping Michael on the shoulder, “See you at practice. Better bring your A game, man, Imma kick your ass this time.”

“We’re on the same team, you dumbass,” Michael said, shoving him away. Alex rolled his eyes and closed the door of his locker, turning to head to class.

“See you later, Guerin.”

“Wait, Alex.”

Alex, putty in his hands as always, allowed his arm to be grabbed and pulled him back so they could talk. The hall was still busy though, so the contact only lasted a minute, but Alex still waited for him to speak.

“You know I have to--”

Again, as if specially designed to ruin everything, Maria DeLuca walked and gave Michael a sweet smile. She was pretty and nice and Alex knew they’d look good together. That only seemed to make it harder when Michael gave her his full focus, giving her that flirtatious smile that made Alex feel sick when it wasn’t for him.

“Hey, Michael,” she said, “I’ve been looking for you.”

Alex had to roll his eyes in irritation, clutching his books as he wondered how easy it would be to slip out of earshot. Probably easily.

“Oh, yeah?” Michael said, “What for?”

“I was wondering, if you had a date for prom yet?” she asked, still giving that pretty smile, “I tried to text you, but you didn’t answer. Did you lose my number?”

To keep from projectile vomiting at the strange dance that was heteronormative flirting, Alex turned to leave.

“I, uh, look, I’ll get back to you, okay? I need to talk to Manes here about an essay he needs to write for me,” Michael said.

“Oh, okay.”

Alex tried to walk faster as Michael followed, but, as soon as they reached a hall full of people who weren’t paying attention, Michael grabbed his arm and pulled him into an empty classroom. He shut the door behind them, giving Alex that borderline scared look that he always gave when he knew he fucked up. Alex still hadn’t quite decided if he used it to knowingly manipulate him or not because it was always painstakingly effective in making him cave.

“What?” Alex asked softly, “Don’t look at me like that. Have fun with your fuckboy ways, I’m not trying to dictate what you do.”

“Alex,” he said, forcing a little laugh as he shook his head, “It’s just a fucking game I gotta play.”

“And like I said, not gonna dictate what you do,” Alex said coldly. Michael moved closer.

“C’mon, you know it’s not real. I just have to appease the parents,” Michael said softly, reaching for Alex’s hand. He reluctantly let him take it. “You’re the the one I want and you know it. Yeah, we have to be discrete and shit, but you know why. Look at me. You know why.”

“Just... how am I supposed to trust you? Every girl in this school would literally fight to the death to get your attention. You could have whatever you wanted,” Alex pointed out. Michael grinned and gravitated closer.

“Then it’s a good thing I want you,” he said, pulling his hand to his lips, “You’re the only one that makes me lose my fucking mind. Why would I let go of that when I have it? My eyes are only on you.”

Alex looked away, trying not to show just how easy it was to fold under his sweet words and his impossibly good looks. Michael came closer, slowly backing him against the teachers desk. Alex fidgeted slightly as he pressed his hips in closer and went from politely kissing his palm to pressing Alex’s fingertips against his lips. Alex tested him and pushed his thumb into his mouth. Michael welcomed it which made it that much harder to remember why he was upset.

“Need help there?” Michael asked quietly, eyes gesturing down to where their hips met. Alex let out a slightly exasperated breath.

“You’re so fucking cute and it’s really hard to be mad at you when you do shit like this,” Alex admitted. Michael smiled all proud and made a show of taking Alex’s forefinger and middle finger into his mouth, hollowing out his cheeks. He gulped and fidgeted some more. “You think you can help me out?”

Michael pulled away from his fingers with an exaggerated pop. “I gotta get to class or I would.”

Alex nodded but he didn’t like it.

“Hey, don’t worry,” Michael said, his hand laying against his cheek, “I’m not going anywhere. You’re stuck with me, I’m not leaving you.”

“Not even for Kyle?” Alex asked teasingly. Michael grinned and shrugged.

“Well, maybe--”

“Shut up,” Alex laughed, shoving his shoulder gently. Michael just laughed and leaned in for another kiss. But they couldn’t do that for long. They had class and this room would be filling with students soon. “I’ll see you soon?”

“I’ll come pick you up,” Michael promised, “We’ll drive out to the desert, lay under the stars, see how what happens.”

“Sounds good.”

“I know,” Michael said, giving him one last kiss, “Miss me.”

He quickly fled the room and Alex sighed, fixing his thought process so he’d actually be useful once he got to class.

And he would miss him. That’s all he did.

#missingalexmanes #missingalexweekend #malex #malex fic #alex manes #michael guerin #roswell new mexico #my fic

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ripmalex · 4 years

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Day 3 | optimism

🤞please don’t let Forrest be evil 🤞please don’t let Forrest be evil 🤞please don’t let Forrest be evil 🤞please don’t let Forrest be evil 🤞please don’t let Forrest be evil 🤞please don’t let Forrest be evil 🤞please don’t let Forrest be evil

#alex manes #forlex #malex #missingalexmanes #missingalexmanesweekend #forrest long #roswell nm #roswell cw #roswell new mexico #missingalexweekend

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alexmanesappreciation · 4 years

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While we still have a long time before our main event, we will soon have a tragic lack of Alex in our lives for 3 entire weeks between 2x10 and 2x12. To tide us over as we go through an Alex drought, let’s create a small collection of gifs, art, and fics featuring our favorite Airman!

Friday May 29th to Sunday May 31st, share your Alex Manes-based creations with us! Please be sure to tag your creations with #missingalexmanes and/or #missingalexweekend in the first five tags so we can showcase your work!

Here are a few general themes for use if you’d like (though please feel free to tag any Alex-centric works created during the event and we will happily reblog!):

love | family, self-worth, respect, expressions of love

loss | sacrifice, disappearance, death, goodbyes

reunion | faith, loyalty, optimism, resilience

#alex manes #roswell new mexico #roswell nm #missingalexmanes #missingalexweekend #admin post #signal boost #alexweek2020

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captainsassmanes · 4 years

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It’s My Life, Don’t You Forget

Alex landed with an ungraceful thump in the patio chair. Groaning, he rested his head up against the back of the seat, face turned toward the darkening sky. He couldn’t help but smile as his gaze quickly found a few constellations he’d learned over the years: just the easy ones like Orion’s Belt and the Dippers. His leg ached from hip to phantom toes, too many hours on a relatively new prosthetic. Through clenched teeth, he lifted his leg up and breathed a sigh of relief once the pressure released as it sat on the ottoman in front of him

It hadn’t necessarily been a bad day, just a long day. Another long day. Too many hours spent standing at a table, analyzing page after page of ancient documentation. Half of it turned out to be intel they already had, the other half horrific detail of experimentation he silently wished he’d never seen.

Michael had been stoic throughout most of the day, only allowing his frustration to break through once or twice. Alex had kept a watchful eye, had been for the last few months truthfully. Their relationship had changed, although he didn’t quite know why, to something of acquaintances instead of friends. Alex took most of the blame for the awkwardness that stood between them now; his consistent avoidance of Michael and Maria obvious to everyone only made worse when his relationship with Forrest ended before it really began. He’d tried to move on, given it a solid effort, but watching Michael with someone else left him with a pain in his chest that made him breathless, and Forrest made sure to point it out before he left with a sad salute.

His mind wandered to the moments he’d shared with Forrest. Soft touches and loud laughs. It had been so easy. It should have been perfect. But he could never fully let go, always holding onto that one piece of his heart that belonged to someone else. Quietly comparing one smile to the other, one kiss to the other.

The sound of squeaking breaks pulled him from his thoughts as a door slammed and Michael sauntered onto the patio. By now, the sky had gone black and the sensor lights he’d installed had kicked on, bathing Michael in a too bright glow.

“Private.” He nodded, cowboy hat doing most of the work.

“Guerin.” Alex couldn’t help the exhaustion creeping into his voice. Sleep had been a luxury he didn’t have time for. And, more recently, the more he tried resting, the more his thoughts raced and his anxiety seemed to take over. He used to be a calm man, very practical. At some point he’d become a worst-case scenario thinker and it was starting to make him a bit mad.

“You forgot this in the bunker.” Michael held out his cell phone, making Alex grimace and grab it quickly. That was a level of careless Alex hadn’t reached before.

Pulling a hand through his hair and shaking his head, Alex whispered, “thanks,” before scrolling through to make sure he hadn’t missed any calls or texts.

“You alright?”

Blinking away the brightness of the screen, Alex watched Michael’s features morph into concern, his voice too gentle. It made Alex’s skin feel too tight.

“I’m fine.”

“You look tired.”

“I am tired but I’m still fine.”

The two men stared, Alex refusing to look away but growing weary maintaining a façade of indifference. Michael showing he still cared meant more to him than he’d admit, but a feeling of discomfort clawed in the depths of his gut, too.

“Maria asked about you the other day. She misses you.”

Pocketing his phone, Alex bit his lip to mask his pain as he pushed to stand. Michael stepped forward but Alex stopped him in his tracks, throwing a hand up in protest.

“Goodnight, Guerin.”

“What’s your problem, Alex?”

He stopped with his hand on the front door, hip screaming. Alex rubbed his hand over his eyes, wondering for the hundredth time why he couldn’t love someone else. Why Michael fucking Guerin had to be his everything. A man who would seemingly never understand, who would never be able to be his.

“I don’t know what it’s gonna take for you to get it, Michael.” He turned to face the man, eyes wide and wet.

“I joined the Air Force to get away from my dad, sure, but to keep you safe, too. I came home and practically ran right to you. I’ve kept your secret. I will always keep your secret. I helped you find Caufield and your mom. I reenlisted for you. I’ve been nothing but supportive of you and Maria even though it’s fucking killing me. I’m at your beck and call but what am I getting, Michael? It’s not love! It’s not friendship! It’s barely even kindness anymore!”

Michael’s arms lay limp at his sides while his mouth hung open in surprise, maybe shock. Alex didn’t care as his body thrummed with adrenaline and the dawning realization that he’d live most of his life for other people. For this person.

Shaking his head, Alex chuckled and ran a hand through his hair, pulling gently. With bloodshot eyes, he looked at Michael and steadied his voice. “I’m done, Michael. I’ve done the best I can to atone for the Manes legacy, I’ve been the best friend I can be. I asked you to choose me and you didn’t. I can’t keep putting you and everyone else first. I’m done.”

“Alex, wait-“

“Goodnight, Michael.”

#missingalexweekend #missingalexmanes #alex manes

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manesalex · 4 years

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“You know, I used to really think that you and I were going to end up together.”

#missingalexmanes #missingalexweekend #roswelledit #roswellnmedit #malexedit #alexmanesedit #roswell new mexico #michael guerin #i love (1) actual disaster #alex manes #actual cinnamon roll #protect him at all costs #michael x alex #otp: home can be a person #*mygifs #abuse tw

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lassos-welton · 4 years

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Missing Alex Manes

Day 1 : Alex + smiling

#alex manes #missingalexmanes #missingalexweekend #roswelledit #roswell nm

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capmanes · 4 years

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It’s good to see you again, Alex. Guys, this is my brother, Gregory.

Is anyone else loving how Gregory was just looking at his brother, happy to see him and didn’t acknowledge the others until Alex did. He missed his brother.

#missingalexmanes #missingalexweekend #alex manes #roswellnmedit #rnmedit #mine: gifs #rnm season 2

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gra-sonas · 4 years

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𝗠𝗶𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗔𝗹𝗲𝘅 𝗠𝗮𝗻𝗲𝘀

𝘥𝘢𝘺 2 | 𝘧𝘭𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘦𝘭 𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘳𝘵𝘴

#alex manes #alexmanesappreciation #missingalexmanes #alexmanesedit #tyler blackburn #roswell new mexico #missingalexweek #rnm 1x01 #rnm 1x02 #rnm 1x05 #rnm 2x01 #rnm 2x05 #rnm 2x13 #my gifs #rnm bts #rnm spoilers

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ravens-words · 4 years

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I wanna know you again

This is written for Missing Alex Weekend, Day 1: Love

(Is a stand alone, but can be a sequel to my fic Bound by Stardust on AO3 because like two people wanted a sequel)

....................

Alex woke up to insistent ringing of his door bell alternating with hurried knocks on his door. He looked to the side and cursed when he saw it was only 1 am. He scrambled out of bed, and with no time to wear his prosthetic, he used his crutches. His heart in his throat, Alex could do nothing to stop himself from imagining one bad scenario after another.

He unlocked his phone to check the footage of his security cameras and stopped dead in his tracks a few feet away from the door when he saw who it was.

Michael was leaning against the door, clutching his stomach and leaning against the door. Alex hurried to the door, let go of one crutch and leaned against the wall to open it. Michael crashed through, since Alex hadn't warned him before opening the door, and ended up sprawled on the floor. Alex resisted the urge to laugh and moved so that he was standing over him, looking down at him and unable to keep from smiling. Michael smiled back, that goofy, unguarded, genuine smile of his, and Alex was helpless against the affection that rose within him at the sight. He carefully used the wall for support as he lowered himself to sit by Michael's head.

"Hey," Michael said, dopey smile still in place as he nuzzled Alex's leg.

Alex laughed and gently lifted Michael's head into his lap and began to comb his fingers through the other man's curls. Michael hummed in pleasure, and Alex did his best to ignore the sudden surge of desire the sound alighted in him. He leaned down and pressed a kiss to Michael's hair and ignored the guilt it caused when he remembered that Michael was with Maria, that Alex wasn't allowed to do this anymore. He was, for once, reckless with his affection, mostly because he was sure Michael wouldn't remember any of it tomorrow with how drunk he was.

Michael's hand flopped in his direction a few times, to Alex's amusement, before it landed on his waist in an awkward imitation of a hug. Alex rubbed his arm. "Michael? You wanna move any time soon?"

He shook his head, scooted his head closer and closer until Alex could feel his breath fanning against his bare stomach, dangerously close. Alex grit his teeth and told himself not to want him, and it took a herculean effort to stop himself from leaning into Michael until he had his lips where he really wanted them.

Alex knew he needed to put distance between them, but it seemed like the more he tried, the more he wanted him. It was counterproductive in the worst way possible.

Alex laughed helplessly. "What are you doing to me, huh?"

Michael just humphed and that was when Alex realized that he was asleep.

Alex wondered if this was his punishment for telling him he loved him and running away before Michael could get a word out.

He honestly hadn't blamed him for needing a minute to digest the reveal of Alex's worst kept secret. Hell, Alex himself had been shocked he'd had the guts to actually say the words. But hearing the uncertainty in Michael's voice, the resignation in the way he'd asked him if he still loved him, had shaken Alex, had hurt in the worst way possible, and his need to reassure Michael that he had, and always would love him won over his instincts that screamed at him to run and protect himself.

Alex closed his eyes and pictured a world where he had been braver, a world where he had allowed his love for Michael outweigh his fear of his father, a world where he had held onto Michael and showed him how much he had loved him every minute of every day. Tears welled in his eyes and he used the heels of his hands to dig into his eyes until he saw stars and then he put all those thoughts away in a little box and focused on the man sleeping on him.

His hand moved to his face on its own violation and he traced the wrinkle between his brows and marveled at the immediate relaxation his touch caused. The tips of his fingers made their way down to his nose and then onto his cheek and down until he reached his lips. He wanted to bend down and let his lips travel the same route his fingers had taken, but he wasn't sure he had the strength to have his lips be so close to Michael's and not be tempted to kiss him.

Alex forced himself to lean back on the wall and took deep breaths, counting back from 100 mindlessly to give his body a chance to catch up with his brain.

Loathe as he was to do it, Alex knew he needed to wake Michael up. He gently shook his shoulder, carded his hand through his hair, called his name softly and none of it worked.

He rolled his eyes. "Michael, " he called his name loudly, then shook him not so gently, but he seemed genuinely dead to the world.

Alex went from fond to annoyed real quick and he considered going to bed and leaving him to sleep on the floor for all of two seconds before he dismissed the thought. He tried to wake him up again, but when it didn't work, he resigned himself to the fact that he would resort to the tried and true method he'd used to wake Kyle up when they'd been kids.

"What the hell?!" Michael shot up, flailing and when he settled, he rubbed his ear with a disgusted look on his face.

Alex snickered and only laughed harder when Michael glared at him while rubbing at his ear. "Real mature."

Alex flushed, but he was still grinning, and he felt light for some reason. Sure, he'd just stuck a wet finger in Michael's ear like a little kid, but he could see Michael trying to keep up the annoyed facade, and then they were both laughing loudly and Alex felt *alive*.

Once their laughter dies down, their eyes locked and though Michael looked two seconds away from laying back down on the floor to sleep, he was looking at him with dark eyes full of want, eyes that kept straying to his lips, and it was overwhelming.

"Help me up?"

Michael tried to stand gracefully but failed and ended up using the wall for support.

Once he was standing on his own, semi-stable, he extended a hand out to Alex. "If you drop me, you're sleeping on the couch."

Michael raised an eyebrow, then hauled him up easily. Alex narrowed his eyes. "You used your powers, didn't you?"

Michael just smirked. He handed him his crutches and they made their way to Alex's bedroom. Alex had a guest room Michael could sleep in, and Michael knew it, but it was a fact they both chose to ignore as they slipped carefully into his bed. They gravitated towards each other, but kept a respectable distance of all of two inches between them. It was a miracle, Alex thought wryly, that they'd even manged that.

"Michael?"

He didn't open his eyes. "Hmm?"

"Why'd you come here?"

His eyes opened, and Alex could see him freeze.

"You want me to go?"

"No!" He rushed to reassure him. "God, no, that's not- I just meant, why come to *me*?"

"Because you told me you loved me, and everything else didn't matter anymore."

He sounded a lot more sober than he had been a few minutes ago, but Alex still though they shouldn't be having this conversation right now.

"Okay," Michael agreed easily when he told him. At his incredulous look, he shrugged. "What I want to say to you won't change, so if it'll make you feel better, I'll just tell you tomorrow."

Alex swallowed, hard, and twisted in the bed to turn off the light. Once the room was bathed in darkness, Michael took his hand in his and interlocked their fingers, and Alex's breath left him in a rush. He hadn't held Michael's hand in so long that this touch alone felt like home.

"Goodnight, Michael."

"Night, Alex."

...............

When Alex woke up, the only feeling he could register was warmth, the type of unnatural warmth he'd come to associate with Michael, and he genuinely thought he was dreaming for the few seconds it took for him to actually wake up. Then his eyes shot open and he looked down to see Michael clinging to him, half of his body on top of his, and Alex felt overwhelmed in the best and the worst way possible.

He slowly disentangled himself from Michael and watched him frown and turn his head a little to the side, as if unconsciously looking for Alex.

And Alex couldn't take it. He closed his eyes, took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. Then he wore his prosthetic. And all the while, he reminded himsel, viciously, that Michael was with Maria, that he'd chosen her, that he couldn't hurt Maria the way she'd hurt him.

Once he was at the doorway, he allowed himself to look back at the man he loved, memorizing the way he looked in his bed, and then he looked away-

He's not yours.

-and he reminded himself to breathe.

.........

Michael woke up just as Alex plated the last pancake and he wondered if he timed that or if it was just a coincidence.

"Coffee?"

Michael just nodded and shuffled his feet. "Listen, Alex, about last night-"

Alex's heart sank and he nodded. "Already forgotten. Don't worry about it."

When he looked at him, Michael's expression screamed 'pissed off' and Alex frowned. "What?"

"What do you mean what?"

Michael shook his head. "God, you piss me off."

Alex felt his hackles rising. "Excuse me?"

"I wasn't that drunk last night, Alex."

Alex crossed his arms tightly and leaned against the counter. "You seemed pretty drunk to me."

"I drank one beer yesterday. What you saw? That was me being bone tired because I haven't been able to get what you said out of my head and it's been driving me insane."

Alex stared, and when hope reared its ugly head, he brutally pushed it down.

"You told me that you love me, Alex. You *love* *me*. And I- do you have any idea how long I've been wanting to hear you say that?"

"I do," he answered honestly. "I've been waiting just as long."

Michael took a step back and Alex could see the gears turning in his head, trying to recall if he really hadn't eversaid it to him. Alex wanted to scoff; as if he'd ever forget Michael telling him that he loved him.

His eyes stung and he turned tot he sink, busying himself with cleaning the pan. The silence was deafening, but he didn't know how to break it. When Alex sensed he was close, so close he could feel the heat emitting from him and he unconsciously swayed closer before he caught himself doing it and pushed himself against the sink, hands braced and knuckles white.

Michael tenderly unfurled his hands and then used his grip to spin him around so that he was facing him.

"I never realized that I didn't say it. It's just- loving you is so ingrained into every part of me that I just thought it was obvious, you know?"

Alex nodded and looked down at their hands. "I was okay with not hearing it, because I thought I didn't need to. I knew how you felt about me, but lately- lately, it felt like it was just something I made up because I needed to feel like someone loved me. And that hurt."

There were tears in both their eyes now, and Alex needed space. He needed to not be where Michael was.

"I love you."

Alex's thoughts, his world, screeched to a halt and he gaped at him.

"I love you, Alex Manes." He crowded him against the sink and he rested his forehead against his. His hands came up to stroke his neck and Alex shivered, moving closer on instinct.

"Loving you is a part of who I am now, Alex. And most days, it's the only part I'm sure of, the only part I'm proud of. I've been an ass, and the way I handled things was-" he shook his head, "Being with Maria was easy because I knew I cared about her, but I would never love her like I love you, and that would mean loving her wouldn't hurt. So, in my head, it made sense to try with her."

Alex moved away from him and swallowed thickly.

"Alex?"

"You can't do this to me. You'r with Maria, so please- just don't- I need you to stop."

"So you get to say it, but I don't?"

"Yes!" Alex hissed through gritted teeth. "Yes, I get to, because I'm not currently with someone, Michael. I'm unattached! So I get to tell you I love you, but you sure as hell don't!"

"Fuck you," Michael told him slowly, without heat. "You think I'm saying all of this to you while I'm still with Maria?"

Alex felt the air leave his lungs and he struggled to find his footing. "What?" He asked faintly.

"I talked to Maria. We're done. I'm unattached, too, darlin'."

Alex searched his face. "Are you sure-"

Michael effectively shut him up with a hard kiss. And good god, it felt like coming home.

"I love you. I've loved you for over ten years now, and I'll never stop loving you. I don't ever want to."

Alex ignored the tears streaming down his face in favor of pulling Michael into his arms. He kissed him softly, once, twice and then migrated up and he kissed every inch of his face, tasting his salty tears and reveling in the fact that for once, they were tears of joy, of relief, of hope for the both of them.

Michael leaned down and buried his head in Alex's neck, breathing in deeply. Alex buried his fingers in his hair, and he tightened his grip unconsciously when Michael's lips brushed against the hollow of his throat, and moved higher, pressing kisses along his neck. He used his grip on his hair to pull his head back and he took a second to take him in. His hair was messy from Alex's fingers, his pupils were blown wide and he was breathing heavily.

Michael's fingers snuck under his shirt and they moved up. It killed Alex to stop him, but he knew he had to. "We are not having sex, Michael."

Michael pulled away and eyed him closely. "And why is that?"

"Because I want to do this right, this time.

Michael looked confused. "Do what right?"

Alex rolled his eyes heavenward and looped his arms around Michael's neck. "Us."

"Why does doing this right include no sex?" He whined.

"Because, Michael," he explained patiently, "we tend to not talk. And we can't do that anymore."

Michael kissed him again, hungry and intense, and Alex almost said fuck it and pulled him into the bedroom, but then the kiss slowed and it became something soft and gentle, almost like Michael had changed his mind mid kiss, and it gave Alex hope that they could build something real, on a solid foundation that wouldn't crumble at the slightest pressure. Michael pulled away, but didn't go far. He kissed the side of his head and Alex felt him smile against his skin.

They stayed wrapped up in each other for a minute, basking in the warmth and saftey of this embrace.

"What are you doing tonight?" Alex asked, the words a mumble into the other man's neck.

Michael heard him all the same and he raised an eyebrow. "I have a feeling I'm about to find out."

"We're going on a date."

Michael stared at him, blinked, and then stared again. "A date?"

"Yes, a date."

Michael suddenly laughed and Alex narrowed his eyes at him. "What?"

"Nothing, it's just- I just realized; we've been in love with each other for over 10 years and we're going on our first date tonight."

#missingalexmanes #missingalexweekend #malex #alex manes #michael guerin #EJ Writes

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