#mod april

[askaborderline]

hello, i'm looking for some advice. i've been struggling to get over a previous fp (we were very close friends for 6 years and they were my fp the entire time) and was wondering if you guys would have any tips on how to cope. i'm sorry if this is a little vague, i don't feel very up to talking about my past with them

Hi anon,

This sounds really hard, and I am sorry. Losing a FP can be so beyond words.

Some things I like to remind myself are:

The feelings are temporary. They will pass. No matter how crushing they may be, you won't feel like this forever. Sometimes it can help to remember that what we're feeling is temporary because when we forget that and think it's how we're going to feel forever, it can make us feel so hopeless. So here's your reminder. This isn't forever,.

You survived without them before, and you can do it again. I promise. It doesn't mean it'll be easy but it can help to have the reminder that we existed before then, and survived before them and we can do both of those things again.

Be kind to yourself. You are valid and you are allowed your emotions.

Healing is not linear. Grief isn't linear. And for a lot of us, when we lose our FP, it is something we need to heal from. It is something we grieve about. And it's okay if we feel ourselves doing better for a bit and then falling back. It doesn't mean you've failed or anything like that.

Some things I do:

Note that these are all personal things I do and aren't rules for how you should cope. I'm sure your own list will differ!

Focus on myself. Even when it's uncomfortable and I don't want to, I focus on my hobbies. I focus on finding new hobbies. Sometimes I make a list of different hobbies I've never tried, and then I go through it and try them at least once to see if I enjoy something. If not, it gets scratched off. These could be new shows, books, activities, etc.

Feel the emotions. Usually not all at once because it's too much, but my instinct is to bury the emotions. To turn my emotions off entirely ((I'm sure others relate to the turning them off thing. It's like a switch I can use). And it's uncomfortable, but sometimes I force myself to feel them. In bits as I can handle it. Allow yourself time to grieve.

Focus on my DBT skills like Urge Surfing for any urges that arise or Radical Acceptance for accepting my feelings.

Come up with a Crisis Plan in case I start to spiral.

I diversified my relationships. I think this is an important thing to do. Even if you have a FP currently. Diversifying your relationships to have other people in your support system can be really good.

This is a personal choice, but I cut off all ties. I kept screenshots of messages they wrote assuring me they cared and stuff like that. I deleted all screenshots. I also made sure I couldn't look at their profiles and check on them. I made sure their numbers were deleted and anything else.

I like to do nice things for someone else. It's hard sometimes to get there, but there's a feeling I get when I make someone smile or help someone out that makes me feel a bit lighter. It reminds me that I am valuable as I am. This is actually a part of the ACCEPTS skill if you're interested in reading more about that.

Work on forgiving myself. Maybe you don't feel you need this, and that's valid. But I did. I had to learn to forgive myself for not knowing better, for making mistakes, and I always remind myself that I am human. In connection with this, I work on letting go of any regrets I have. It's easier said than done, I know. It's important for me to remember that I can't change the past, so dwelling on any regrets doesn't help me. What I can do is learn from them and do better.

I know it's hard, anon. But it really does get better. I have lost FP's and thought the entire world was ending and that I would never recover. I still think about them sometimes, but it's such a dull ache that I barely notice it. It might always hurt a little, but it will be manageable.

Here are some other coping ideas for you.

You can do this anon,

April

#fp #losing a fp #mod april #aab

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

thank you sm for sharing the dbt resources! i am looking specifically for resources related to emotional regulation and distress tolerance, in case there are any you could recommend.

I'm going to give you a few skills to start with but keep in mind that if these don't help you, it doesn't mean that none will.

For Emotional Regulation:

Check the Facts is one of my favourites because I tend to be a rational person for the most part and it reminds me to look at things from that sort of perspective when my emotions are out of hand. Here is a link to a page on the skill.

Self-Validation is one I also find useful. Here is a link to a page on the topic.

For Tolerance:

ACCEPTS is one of my favourites for tolerance. It can help with distracting and get through an immediate emotional crisis. Here is a post about it.

Pros & Cons is another one I find useful. Here is a post I wrote on the topic which includes examples so hopefully it's easy to apply. While it can be used in immediate crisis, I recommend trying it in advance with some urges you get frequently or once in awhile so you can have the list handy to look over.

I hope that this gives you a place to start, anon!

#dbt #mod april #trauma talks

[new-xkit-support]

When I go to Mass Post Editor (Mass+), it shows me random blog posts, not my own. How can I fix this or is it a known bug? I've already updated the extension.

The Mass Post Editor is a Tumblr feature, not an XKit one. Mass+ simply gives it more features. Please report this to Tumblr support, assuming it still happens with Mass+ disabled!

#mod april

[daily-grian]

im booping him

egads he's been booped

#mcyt #grian #hermitcraft #grian fanart #daily-grian #mod owl #april fools #boop #archangelofthestars #ask

[077891st]

trying to remember how to draw again 🐠

#my art #geminitay #sketch #mcyt #hermitcraft #mcytblr #art #hermitblr #mcyt fanart #geminitay fanart #hermitcraft s10 #hc s10 #hermitcraft fanart #i've never drawn a fish in my life can you tell #my mom switched us to an ISP that works really well in the rurals but we dont live in the rurals so the speed is hilariously poor. #I'm reliving 2011 against my will. it took 3 hours to download all 20 of the stardew mods i use. i watch youtube videos in 140p. #it takes 5 minutes to send an email. like. from pressing send to the mail being sent. #autosaving this post failed!!! i didnt know that was something that could happen #customer support has been unhelpful. this whole thing feels like an elaborate april fools joke. im not upset btw it IS funny

[weirdmarioenemies]

Name: Spamley

Debut: Ralph Breaks the Internet

Hey, remember the Ralph Breaks the Internet craze of 2018? What a time to be alive! Disney's film about What If The eBay Was A Place was an instant hit, due to the fact that everyone knows the Internet, and everyone wants to see a movie about it! You couldn't stop hearing about it! No wonder it won the Academy Award for best animated film! I think it beat out some movie about spiders, or something...?

Kids today might not remember, because 2018 was so long ago. They're too obsessed with their new age sexymen, like Raymond and the big balls Dwarf. But this movie wouldnt've been the cultural phenomenon it was without one character taking the world by storm: a certain J.P. Spamley!

The Internet fell in love with Spamley at first sight, flooding social media with memes and fan art about the loveable green prick. He rose to the highest ranks of the Tumblr Sex Man for a good while! You couldn't scroll for a few minutes without seeing his catchphrase, "Now's your chance to get rich playing video games!"

What kind of a megacorporation would Gisnep be if it didn't capitalize on Spamley's popularity? So they held a special Spamley Sweepstakes event on November 2019, allowing fans to donate money in honor of Spankley himself! All proceeds would go to Bob Iger and Baby Yoda, and if that's not wholesome, I don't know what is. Those who entered even had a chance of winning WILD prizes, like:

That's it that was the only prize

See him in theatres! This is what Disney told us all to do, and we listened! Little did we know they were doing this to hide a dark secret! If you buy the Blu-ray version of the movie, you can actually manipulate the Scene Select to watch the movie out of order and make some... strange things happen. You can look up a walkthrough online, but the gist of it is making Vanelope kill all the Disney Princesses. Especially Merida. And when you do, you unlock a weird alternate ending...

Spamley NEO is the secret true main antagonist of the film, and he wants to take over Oh My Disney to spread spam and advertisements! No! Not Oh My Disney! Please, for the love of God, NOT OH MY DISNEY!! You have to kill him. You have to destroy your Blu-ray copy of Ralph Breaks the Internet now. I hope you're proud of yourself.

#spamley #ralph breaks the internet #wreck it ralph #oh my disney #mod f boy #unreality #april fools

[same-picture-of-a-rock-every-day]

That rock deserves a solid boop.

The Rock has been thoroughly bapped, my goodness.

#i need yall to understand i have NEVER made a gif before today #to make the second one i took a random video of a cat #i put the rock over it in one webbed site #used imove to cut and repeat the bapping #and then used NOTHER website to convert it into a gif #slapstick at best but took me under 10 mintues and im kind of proud of that even if it is shit quality #not a rock #april boops #boop #rock mod lore #love yall for this btw u broke my boop meter within an hour #gotta run to my gender and sex in roman times class now wish me luck i love college

[pastawayallday]

First Procreate drawing! I'm still learning how to use it, so many options.

#The monstrosity Donnie holds is a gameboy with all the gadgets because let's be honest he would mod the shit out of it #In my mind they're exchanging pokemons #rottmnt #save rottmnt #save rise of the tmnt #unpause rise of the tmnt #unpause rottmnt #donatello #april o'neil #my art

[sysboxes]

[Text; for april fools we're deleting the entire site/blog, sayonara you weaboo shits]

#endos dni #system #userbox #did #anti endo #osdd #traumagenic system #system stuff #this user #mod luxray🐈‍⬛️⚡️ #april fools

[ratcate]

yaahoooo!

#fake peppino #pizza tower #btw april 20th update I am now part of that said fake peppino mod and having a blast #working on animations for your viewing pleasure! #nyooomm

[askaborderline]

Hello! I've been wondering, what exactly is radical acceptance? I've seen the word thrown around several times but nothing that would tell me what the gist is

Hi anon,

Radical Acceptance is basically about accepting our feelings, without pushing them down, even the negative ones.

It means accepting reality and feelings for what they are, though it doesn't mean you don't want to change them.

Here's an example (This is a "small" situation because I think this is best started with a more manageable circumstance first.):

Step 1 - Think of a situation that you have feelings about. (Note that I don't recommend trying this with traumatic events to start which is why I've used the example below.)

Example: Yesterday I embarrassed myself in front of the cashier at the store when she said "Here's your receipt" and I said "thanks, you too!" This has heightened my anxiety about future situations where I need to talk to a stranger.

Step 2 - What caused the event? Stick to facts and don't make judgements about something you've done.

Example: I was distracted by feeling overwhelmed and misunderstood what she was saying.

Step 3 - Accepting the feelings. What emotions do you feel when you think back on this event? Try and be open about this and note any physical changes you might feel like your heart beat increasing.

Example: I feel embarrassed when I think back on it and it makes my hands a little sweaty.

Step 4 - The plan. This is where you come up with a plan on how to handle the situation and/or its effects. If you are not significantly affected by the situation, the acceptance steps may be enough. The DBT skill "Wise Mind" might be a good skill to use when coming up with a plan

Example: I can use rational thoughts to help me navigate this. Realistically, she probably talks to dozens of people a day. She also unfortunately probably deals with a lot of rude people that are more likely to stay on her mind rather than my little mix up with words. If anything, maybe it was refreshing for her because I was polite and chipper with her and maybe she felt the positive effects of that mood I was trying to convey.

Here are some coping thoughts that may help:

I do not have control of the past, only this current moment.

Ignoring my emotions only allows them to fester and continue to bother me.

This is uncomfortable, but I am going to get through this.

I hope this helps!

April

#mod april #radical acceptance #dbt #aab

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

Tw nsfw? I really want to have sex with my boyfriend but I feel so scared and wanted advice? Please don’t suggest I don’t do it. I really really want to. I’m just nervous about all the stuff that could go wrong and stuff?

Hi anon!

I definitely have some advice for you. And I won’t suggest you don’t do it, but I do encourage you to look at why you want to do it. I wrote an article that gives advice for communication, and before, during and after. It’s here. I’ll list some of the main points though!

So before we want to look at why you want to do it. I don’t doubt that you want to but it’s good to be aware of whether we want to because we want to or think we should.

I also encourage you to read this page on consent.

When it comes to communication, this is crucial to every stage but it’s so important it deserves its own category.

Make sure to talk about any boundaries you and your partner may have beforehand.

If relevant, while you don’t have to talk about your trauma it might be good to talk about how it may affect you. Or in general what may happen if you get anxious. Is there a chance you’ll freeze up? Go non verbal? Etc.

With that said, come up with a non verbal signal for “stop” in case you do freeze/go non verbal.

Also arrange for check ins in case you can’t move. Check ins don’t have to ruin the mood! They can be done in sexy ways. And make sure your partner understands that not responding to a check in means stop!

When it comes to “before”, I recommend making sure you’re comfortable with your partner in other ways physically. Like dancing, cuddling etc.

When it comes to “during” remember that there’s no rules (other than consent) for how this must happen. If the lights bug you, you can keep them off. Vice versa if the dark is scary for you! You can skip kissing or anything you want!

“After” is super important. “There may be unexpected responses to the ending of sexual activity. Even if the activity was good and fun, some people may experience a mood drop. This may have nothing to do with your actual mood and everything to do with the chemistry involved in intense activities like sex. It does not mean that the experience was bad. During these activities, chemicals such as adrenaline, dopamine, serotonin, norepinephrine and oxytocin may all be mixing together in the brain to make you feel extremely good. After sex, levels of these chemicals in the brain can drop, sometimes very quickly. This is what causes a mood drop”. With this said, plan for aftercare.

“Some people find cuddling with their partner can help with the emotions, whereas some people prefer to practice their own self-care and self soothe instead. Some people even have a “self care” box for after that includes a variety of things that may be helpful. Some examples may include: a comfort item, a tasty treat (like chocolate), a favourite movie or other calming things. If there are things that your partner can say or do to help, make sure to communicate that with them. “

The quotes are taken from my article and there’s a lot more info in it if you have time to read it. I just gave the basics of it here but there are more info under each section in my article as well as overall other things to consider.

Feel free to write back in if you have any questions!

April

#mod April #trauma talks #tw sex

[royalarchivist]

So.

I see you guys discovered the Tumblr Boop feature.

I can't possibly keep up with booping everyone back, so I hope you guys will accept this as a response instead! :'D

#mod talk #Happy April Fool's Day! #Silly Stuff #Edited #I genuinely don't mind the notification stuff I just can't keep up with booping everyone back lmao #(Don't ask me how long I spent on this. That's between me and God) #This also just made me realize I've never updated my avatar. I should get around to that.... eventually #It's not perfectly synched because I could not justify spending more time on this #But this did make me laugh and honestly that's all the excuse I need to do something silly

[cashmoneychiyo]

Gekkan Shoujo Nozaki-kun Chapter 149 © Cash Money Chiyo

... Or so I'd like to say, but we ended up having a tanuki infestation just earlier, which resulted in half the chapter getting eaten away and the remaining pages getting, erm, buggy.

Please bear with us while we chase these [redacted] away, and we'll have the chapter ready for you again soon (；￣Д￣)

#mod grolia #beginning of April? no I didn't notice why do you ask??? #spoiler alert(??? is there anything significant to spoil with this??? who knows) #gsnktranslation (except not really) #oops I didn't mean to mess up the photoset layout (tumblr editor still sucks I see)

[deepmoonsims]

april 🌸

DOWNLOAD♡ (Patreon; Free)

by deepmoon✨

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#sims 4 custom content #sims 4 #sims #sims 4 cc #sims 4 maxis match #sims 4 cas #sims 4 creator #the sims cc #ts4 #ts4cc #my simmies #simming #simmer #ts4 simmer #sims download #the sims 4 #ts4 cc download #ts4 dl #my sims #simdump #simdownload #simdl #simblr #april #the sims community #sims lookbook #the sims #sims 4 mods #showusyoursims #alpha sims

[weirdmarioenemies]

Mola mola. The mola we all knowla. The mola we all molove. What an incredible creature, Mola mola is! Such a strange shape, so many eggs, no swim bladder... and the size. Its most prized aspect! If you know one thing about Mola mola, it’s that it is the largest bony fish, right?

...Right?

Nuh-uh-uh, Mola mola. Don’t try and sneak away. It’s very noticeable. After all, you are one of the biggest bony fish!

Let me repeat that. One of the biggest bony fish.

Mola mola, the ocean sunfish, is NOT in fact the largest known bony fish! You’d think we were talking about Mola tecta, because this sunfish has hoodwinked us!

Behold MOLA ALEXANDRINI! Known, very appropriately, as the giant sunfish. This is the true heaviest bony fish! Not Mola mola, as has so been thought, and as I have even claimed in front of all of you. I was wrong! Mola alexandrini has been recorded weighing up to 6,049 pounds, with Mola mola trailing in the measly little 2,000s range. But if Mola alexandrini can be so much bigger, how was Mola mola seen as the champion for so long?

It was a misunderstanding. A misidentification! That huge specimen was caught all the way back in 1996, but thought to be Mola mola until it was reevaluated in 2017! Members of the Mola genus are just always accidentally tricking us humans. I’m sure they would say “sooorry” in a deep and booming, yet slow and gentle voice if they knew.

So how can you #KnowYourMolas? It is easy to confuse them- even scientists do it- but generally, be sure to notice the shapes of both the face and the clavus (the funny butt fin)! If the face is relatively smooth, and especially if the clavus has a scalloped shape, that’s Mola mola. If the face is bulgy and bumpy and the clavus is smooth and round, that’s Mola alexandrini! And if the face is smooth but the clavus is too, then you have been hoodwinked by Mola tecta!

So there you have it. The truth about the Mola mola! Not the biggest after all... but that does not matter to me. Mola mola will always be my favorite! That being said, please show Mola alexandrini some love too, as despite its size, it is still a lesser known Mola!

And who knows? Maybe even alexandrini will be dethroned! Maybe we will find a bigger alexandrini, or maybe a bigger mola! Maybe even a different species altogether is the true largest bony fish! There is no way to know what the future has in store... so many secrets in the ocean!

Refer here for more information on the updated identification!

#mola mola #mola alexandrini #mola tecta #molidae #mola #ocean sunfish #giant sunfish #hoodwinker sunfish #april fools #not mario #fish #mod chikako