#moomin holding a knife

[it-is-no-desert]

I'm having a very good time

Bonus moomind'alor and sith moomin:

ID: Repeated screencaps of Moomintroll holding a knife edited to be a lighsaber, each in various colours of the rainbow. /End I.D.

#well.... here it is #the lightsaber moomin saga continues... #enjoy?? #spending my long weekend with only the most rewarding of editing projects #feel free to use these as icons w credit if u like #moomintroll #star wars #lightsaber

[penny-anna]

The thing about associating people with their profile image is that I just saw a post with a moomin-with-a-knife sticker and thought “huh I wonder what penny-anna is holding a knife about” and it took me a hot second to realize

yeah no that was me w my knife. you got a problem w that??

[mwebber]

6, 16, 20, 48, 58

>:3 nayq for all because i mean we know who is the better driver it's obviously [i am removed from your ask box]

nayq for all! okay!! let's go!!

6. Who would beg the other not to leave? Who has to leave to protect the other?

canonically they both fuck up bad enough to inspire the other person to leave, but i think mark's the only one who begs seb to stay during the Great Almost-Break-Up of 2013, so i'll go with that! as for who has to leave to protect the other--it's gotta be seb, who's an Actual Double Agent. but seb would (and does) put up a fight to stay with mark, because that's imperfect love babeyy

16. Can they stay up all night just talking?

when their relationship is good, yes!! mark loves the sound of seb's voice, especially when they're cuddling and they don't have to raise their voices over a murmur. they'll pick up any thread of convo. usually it starts with mark asking seb something, and seb going on a spiel he has locked and loaded, and mark prompting him onwards. more often than not, it turns into a lighthearted debate about trivial things. but sometimes, when mark is feeling up to it (esp after they fix their marriage), they'll talk about life philosophies and deeper things and even the future. but ever since [REDACTED BECAUSE PREQUEL SPOILERS BUT YOU KNOW] they've been super careful about jinxing their chances for things.

20. Choose one song that perfectly describes their relationship.

... ONE? oughh i wanna say accidentally in love by counting crows SO bad. but like canonically i think it's more like. easy love by lauv. but their first dance is a thousand years by christina perri for a reason. BUT one of the main inspirations for this entire fucking thing is barry manilow's cover of can't take my eyes off you. anyway. where was i. oh yes. one song? i can't help falling in love with you, elvis presley. cas voice i just. i like songs about love. is that a good enough answer, dean?

48. Who's the better driver?

yeah yeah the better driver. we all know the one. yeah uh. uhm. no i'm kidding it's seb. 4x nascar champion :)

58. Who’s more likely to hold a grudge after an argument?

oh, seb for sure. but when it comes to mark, he also forgives the grudges easily--literally lost count of the number of times mark fucks up and seb is like that moomin knife meme, taking it out and then putting it away. in all seriousness, though: in french, you have the verbs connaître and savoir, right. they both mean "to know"--but they're different kinds of knowing. savoir is easy; it's the kind of absolute knowing that comes with facts. connaître, meanwhile, is more associated with familiarity, as in familiarity with people and places. in english, when you say you know someone, you mean it in this familiar way, but there's no distinguishing between the kinds of knowing. seb knows mark, and he knows mark loves him. the extent of this knowledge changes over the course of the series! but he almost knows it all in more of the savoir sense; as an absolute, as an inherent part of the world, because in their world, it literally is. so it's easy to hold and drop grudges like stones. at the end of the day, they want to be together, even with all their issues!! in mark's words: everything else is white noise.

ask me about martian / nobody asks you questions!

#nobody asks you questions #inbox #thank you caro!! #martian #martian monday #my writing #endured psychic damage reading twist and shout just now #' different huh?' 'different.' #long post

[spelltrophy]

Angry Moomin holding knife

A popular Moomin meme redrawn

#animal art #animal illustration #artists of tumblr #artwork #art stuff #digital painting #pet portrait #moomin #moomins #moomintroll #digital art #digital illustration #digital doodle #meme #memes #ムーミン #무민 #moominvalley #kawaii #tumblr memes #art tag #art #my art #cartoon #artists on tumblr #lol memes

[lonelyvomit]

Abby, I had the most ridiculous dream. I usually don't remember dreams that much but this one my brain chose. I was at BC’s concert and everything was going smoothly, though I was the only person in the audience?? Then suddenly I see Samy climbing on the ceiling during BC’s set so naturally I got distracted as I was worried to death that he would fall. Then I hear screaming on the stage and Niko was holding a huge (like bigger than Tommi) Moomin stuffed animal and stabbing it violently with a knife. All the while Olli was sobbing and yelling “don’t do it!” but Niko continued to do it and was getting like human insides out of the poor Moomin. So Olli started bawling which made Joel freak out and he tried his best to keep the show going on. But the floor started to shake and a huge canyon-like crack appeared. Then Tommi and I were stuck on a ledge that we couldn't get off. So I started to freak out too but Tommi was calm and I got to hold his hand which made everything better. I don’t remember how it all ended but Tommi was really comforting which was nice.

first off. I love that your dream Niko is still somehow on my brand, just crossed over to the horror side of my interests. 10/10 would love Moomin-murderer Niko 😌

Olli was screaming cus he's a Snufkin the Moomin was his boyfriend.

obsessed with Joel trying to keep a normal show going while this is all going down.

and I wonder if there's an iterpretation for the ground cracking open in a dream because this is reminding me of a nightmare I had when I was 6 that fucking traumatized me so bad I remember it almost 20 years later 🥲 that also had that happen so I don't think it's an uncommon theme 🤔

anyway thank you this was a trip 😂😂

#asks

[ben-the-hyena]

The poor wording had me do a double take in that article

#either it's the wording or it's me i don't know lol #article #english #medicine #gender identity #meme #reaction image #moomin holding a knife #moi #lol

[ghost-roads]

I was tagged by @nexter2nd to post pictures I have saved that describe me.

I don't really save that many memes so most of these are my own pictures (read the tags if you want context lol)

tagging: @amaryllis-daydream @essercipertuttienonperse @thatadroitgeek @piraticals @sarcasmisalifechoice

#tagged #ok so from left to right / top to bottom we have: #lesbian rights in louis' handwriting ✊ #me holding rats #a dog i saw once that had a jacket that said security. no cops at pride just this dog and its little jacket ✌️ #my grandmother's cow plate and butter knife. every time i stay at my grandparents' i have breakfast in this plate #a cute bracelet i made ft. my moomin poster #i do not. see it #just hold on in louis' handwriting! tattoo inspo mayhaps? #slut. #the freeks around the music stand are me and my friends and this is just a regular school day for us #swear. swear on dolly. #(in case you didn't know dolly parton is my actual mother she birthed me)

[demoncourse]

oh god i was looking for knife Snufkin pics and found an ace edit so I made this

ace edit Snufkin by @bluehairedspidey

#did you know if you look up moomin knife you get five results of pockets knives with moomins on them #before getting the actual picture of moomin holding a knife #murmurs #my edit

[elesii]

is redbubble actually hard to manage or am i just dumm

#i doubt anyones actually buying merch of moomin holding a rainbow knife butbi like to think im productive

[nekumiho]

its 2 am but i couldnt, in good conscious, go to bed without finishing this (chef finger kiss) identical

#moomins #moomin #moominvalley #little my #snufkins the one holding the knife

[whatamidoingwithmylifeman]

Hanzo went straight for the kill

Shinnok, Cassie, and Hanzo belong to NRS. Meme made by me. Moomin holding knife image screencaped from the 1991 Moomkin tv series and edited by unknown

#mk hanzo #mk cassie cage #moomin holding knife meme #mk shinnok

[charliedanilovich]

ID: a digital drawing of Moomin and Snufkin in their old age. Moomin has a bow tied around his neck and is wearing a short top hat with another bow tied around it, he also has an earring in his left ear, and is wearing a wedding ring. He has a smoking pipe in his mouth and is looking grumpily over at Snufkin, who has just lit his pipe for him and is still holding the smoking match. Snufkin is wearing a baggy dress with an untied scarf draped around his shoulders, and a huge hat with a knife stabbed through it. His hair is long and goes all the way down to his waist, and he has an eye patch over his right eye, and a scar on his left cheek. Snufkin is also wearing a wedding ring. ED. 

Sometimes. You just have to hit your fave couples with the boomerification beam. 

#moomin #the moomins #snufmin #moomintroll #snufkin #springdove #artist on tumblr #my art #charlie's art

[tenthgrove]

Hold Me Tight (Or Don’t)- Chapter 13

Pairings: Risotto x Reader

Genre: Soft Yandere

“Are you calm enough to continue now?” Risotto checks in with you softly, handing you a cup of your favourite warm drink as you lie on the reclined sofa.

“Mhmm,” you respond, still tight-lipped and shell-shocked from the sight you just witnessed. You sip the drink slowly, eyes not leaving the knife on the table opposite Risotto moulded from the statue. It was a statue before, yes? You aren’t going feverish, are you?

“Now,” Risotto begins, resuming his seat opposite you. “I believe it’s time I explained what I just saw. I understand it’s a shock to you, so if you need me to clarify anything, you can interrupt at any point.” He picks up the knife, turning it over in his hands. “In retrospect, my previous assertion that I possess supernatural abilities was probably misleading. More accurately, I possess ownership, or rather… a shared soul, with a supernatural entity intangible to this world. It is the same for all my other accomplices with abilities of their own. We call these creatures stands.”

“And… you can make this thing act out its powers at will, I gather.”

“Precisely. Every stand has its own ability and mine is to manipulate iron. I can control iron wherever I find it, in the air, the dirt, and- as is most pertinent for my particular line of work- the blood.”

“Oh,” you say, your body cringing at the thought of what he’s implying.

“That’s actually how I knocked you out the day I took you, by the way. I made a small blockage in the jugular, holding it just long enough to inject the drugs I’d brought without causing any permanent damage. Trying to put a needle in your arm while you were still struggling would have been risky, to say the least.”

“Interesting…”

“What I want you to know above all else is that Metallica is fully within my control. I cannot activate it without deliberate thought, and that I would never do with you, Bedda. I don’t want you to be afraid because of this new revelation,” Risotto urges you.

Hang on, what did he just call it?

“...Your blood-bending hell-energy is called Metallica?” you reiterate lowly.

“Oh- I um, should have clarified sooner. I’m not just being eccentric- naming your stand after a song or band is a tradition!” Risotto says, covering his mouth too late to hide his growing blush.

“And you chose…”

“Metallica. Look, I grew up rural in a place without internet, and I didn’t even own a computer until I was 16. Had I gained my stand later in life I probably would have chosen something else but as I am I’m somewhat fond of it and-”

“Ris, it’s fine! It’s cute!” you laugh.

“Really?” Risotto smiles bashfully. “Well- I’m glad you like it.”

“Can I see it? I wanna know what a supernatural entity intangible to this world looks like now.”

“I’m sorry, but no. It’s not possible unless you’re a stand user yourself. The vast majority of the population who do not possess stands can only see the effects, if any, their abilities have on the natural world. But… I could describe it to you if you like,” Risotto offers.

“Go on.”

“My stand is a bit irregular, you see. Most are just one body but mine has many dozens. Colony stands, they’re called. Now as for what they look like… have you ever seen The Moomins?”

“I am intrigued to see where you are going with this.”

“Well, it’s a bit pointless if you don’t know it but well- do the Hattifatteners ring a bell? No? Nevermind then. They look like smooth little nuggets of iron, ranging from about the size of a fingernail to a palm, and with a few lines of stitches each. Their faces are only what I could describe as cartoon ghosts, a couple of holes for the eyes and one for the mouth. They also have arms, but they aren’t good for anything except making the metal hand-sign.”

“Truly a facet of your soul.”

“They certainly go with me quite well,” Risotto admits. He points at your shoulder. “And you, Bedda. There’s one on your shoulder right know.”

You screech and try to flick the invisible creature away. Risotto chuckles.

“It likes you, sweetheart, it likes you.”

You sigh, and lean back into your chair.

“Is that everything then? Got all your surprises out? Or while we’re at it do you also want to confess to being the long-lost heir to a multi-billion dollar family condemned to a life of indentured servitude in a changed identity?”

“No, that’s my teammate Prosciutto,” Risotto tells you deadpan. “I assure you I’m done now. You can go back outside if you want.”

::::::::::::

Risotto is obsessive in checking you for signs of returned sickness after your play in the snow. You let him bathe you again- still partially clothed but with less apprehension than you did the last time. He sees this, and sticks around this time, washing your hair carefully with multiple rounds of shampoo and conditioner. After that he seats you on the stool, kneeling in front of you and drying your limbs. He presses a kiss to your knuckles.

Following a blowdry, and a short stint of television, you are in bed together, lights out. You reach out for Risotto’s hand then, feeling brazen, reach for his chest instead.

“Would you like me to hold you, Bedda?” Risotto asks warmly.

“Yes please. I’ve missed it.”

“You should have said,” Risotto says sadly, turning you onto your side so he can press your back against his torso.

“I thought you were mad at me,” your remind him.

“Even if I were, I would always hold you if you wanted me to.”

Without a word, you shuffle around to face him, still enveloped in his arms. You smile. It’s too dark to see, but you know somehow he knows you’re smiling. You nuzzle your head into the crook of his neck. It’s warm, and so unexpectedly soft. Risotto strokes the hair on the back of your head. He holds you tighter.

“I love you.”

You reach your arm around his torso.

“It’s okay, you don’t have to say it back,” Risotto stresses.

“I think, soon… I might.”

::::::::::::

Your leg heals up around the same time the ground hardens up again, after days of muck from melted snow. The dirt now is frozen but not icy. Perfect for a good walk if you’ve got the right clothes.

Risotto lends you his hand to help you up a small ledge to reach the top of the hill. Your breath is a fine mist in the winter air, drifting off to join the pearly clouds above you. You turn down to look at the valley you’ve climbed out of, your house tucked away just within view behind the trees.

“This is probably my favourite spot in the area,” Risotto says. He sits on the trunk of a fallen tree, patting the bark for you to sit beside him. You comply. “You can see for miles around.”

“Is that a mountain over there?” you point, noting the tall, hulking figure in the distance.

“Yes, that’s Vesuvius,” Risotto informs you. He drags your finger right. “And if you look very carefully, you can just about make out the skyline of Naples. See?”

“Yes!” you affirm, noting the white speckles of buildings lying next to the mountains. This place is starting to feel a lot more like part of the world than separate from it, something that started when Risotto told you you could eventually leave the house again, and continued today, when he came through with that promise.

“Shall we stay here for a minute?” Risotto offers. “You aren’t too cold are you?”

“No I’m fine,” you hold up your gloved hands. “I’m plenty warm here.”

Risotto takes a swig of the coffee he’s been keeping warm in his bag.

“There’s a lot to explore here, and I know how to find my way. If we continue along the path here, there’s an old mausoleum. Back down the hill and to the right, there’s what’s left of an abandoned village, centuries old. There are deer in the field to the left of here, and in the summer it lights up beautifully with the glow-worms come evening. If you are ever in need of enjoyment, I am happy to come and walk with you any time.”

“I can’t wait to see it all,” you affirm, squeezing his hand. Risotto’s fingers trail down your arm. He looks at you lovingly, then stands up, ready to move on to wherever it is you wish to go with him. You get up after him, trapping him in a hug from behind.

“Hey,” he chuckles. “What’s this for?”

He turns around and that’s all you need. Leaning up as far as you can reach, you peck him on the lips. Risotto’s eyes widen in shock, then he smiles. He leans down and kisses you more.

#hmt(od) #yandere cw #risotto nero #risotto nero x reader #risotto x reader #la squadra #la squadra x reader

[inkmemes]

this  country  (  2017  -  2020  )  sentence  starters ↪  taken  from  the  bbc  mockumentary.  trigger  warning  for  mentions  of  religion,  death,  sex.  alter  as  you  see  fit  ♡

“i like the underdog.”

“don't be a fucking dick.”

“everyone comes together on days like today and just forgets their utter hatred of each other.”

“everyone who's anyone's going to be there and there are people from my past that would love to see me slain.”

“there's a tea rooms there and under the counter they've got a panic button and if i take one step inside, they can press that. the police will be there in three minutes.”

"he whatsapped me the other day asking us to go laser quest with him and i ... well, i clicked on it by accident, didn't i? so he knows i've seen it."

"i mean, i get it, but it's not making me feel nothing."

“it's baffling. i'm baffled by the entire situation, if i'm honest.”

“what the actual fuck? what the actual fuck? you have fucking lost your head, mate. you have lost your fucking head.”

“when i get hold of you, i swear to god i will fucking deck you.”

"someone's just been throwing plums at my house. i'm going to kill them. i can't believe it. i can't believe it. all over this. plumming on here, plumming on that. plum on the sofa, look! there's nothing left that hasn't been plummed."

“i've had a target on my back since the day i was born.”

“thank you very much, enjoy your free potatoes.”

“do you know how small your brain is?”

“hogwarts is that way, dumbledore.”

“he used to say i looked like the puppet off the dolmio advert.”

“there's a kid crying over there. do you want me to...? i can tell him to shut the fuck up if you want?”

“he genuinely looked like a moomin.”

“on my first day of karate club, karate master goes to me, [name], i don't know why you're here because i can't teach you anything. if anything, you should be teaching me." and just gave me his black belt.”

“you know that little old blind man? yeah, when i was punching him in his face, the lens from his glasses broke and cut my knuckle.”

“some things are just best left in the past, where they belong.”

“what's the point in knocking if you're just going to walk in anyway?”

“it was a miscarriage of justice though, cos what people forget is 12 out of them 20 hostages actually found it funny.”

“i lied so much i still don't know what's real life and what's plain lies.”

“i'm so glad you're out of that lying phase.”

“he likes to be the only person on the road, so whenever he sees a car coming the other way he just pulls over.”

“nasa went through hundreds of them in the '60s. and now every time i see a really bright star in the sky i can't wish on it, cos in my head i'm thinking, ‘that's probably just a spacecraft with some monkey bones in it.’”

“you absolute traitor. that's my cheese - it's my fucking house!”

“don't you dare eat that cheese. you eat that and i will smash this. i promise you, i will smash you with this.”

“fuck! you switched them!”

“yeah, i can see it's fucking burnt, sherlock.”

“i honestly am ashamed to know him, sometimes.”

“if you knock on someone's door, don't take no for an answer. get into their house. if they say, ‘leave my house’, stay. and if they say, ‘i'm going to call the police’, you walk upstairs and see if there's anybody else upstairs to sell to.”

“she looks like uncle fester.”

“right. i'm going to piss in their flowers, then.”

“you really need to go home. your mum's called the police and everything.”

“you're also fired from being my best mate, by the way.”

“in business, there will always be setbacks. i don't drink my own juice, fray bentos doesn't eat his own pies. but that's business.”

“do you know what, i don't actually want to play this any more, because it is actually very, very boring.”

“i'm ashamed of myself, that's not usually me, so don't get the wrong impression.”

“i genuinely think one of them fancies me as well.”

“it's fate her moving across the street.”

“the problem with finding a girlfriend in the village is that most of the girls you meet round here are old-age pensioners.”

“yeah, i am looking for a relationship, but thing is i've just got so many trust issues, yeah, with being fucked over massive in the past, so no matter how much i get close to someone now i'm thinking in the back of my head, ‘shit, am i going to get fucked over?’ because i've been fucked over in the past massively. my last relationship proper fucked me up.”

“i went through a really dark phase. listening to papa roach and just blowing everything up with them little french bangers.”

“shut up, you don't know what you're talking about!”

“i don't like the man. i know he's my uncle, but i don't like him.”

“it's just malicious lies, that's all it is.”

“i'm not saying i've got a cruel heart, but if she ain't willing to take me as i am rather than the monster i've become, then she can literally just jog on back to sea with all the other fish cos i don't care.”

“what do you look for in a boyfriend?”

“the key to dating, yeah, is the two rs and the three ts. 'respect, rapport, and talking, talking, talking.' don't ever let that ball hit the ground. good relationships are built on great conversation.”

“on a date, you've got to tell them all the interesting stuff about you, because that's what they'll be interested in.”

“he said to me, he goes, ‘you can't smoke on here.’ i said, ‘i'm not smoking, i'm vaping.’ the look on his face when i said that. i don't think he knew what vaping… what a vape is.”

“you would make me the happiest mouse if you say yes and become my spouse.”

“here's a tip, [name], next time you take a chick out on a date, don't bore her to tears.”

“roses are red, violets are blue, i've got five fingers, the third one's for you.”

“get out of my way, pipe cleaner.”

“[name] phoned me the other day at three in the morning saying, ‘come quick,

there's a hedgehog in the garden that looks exactly like grandad.’ so i got up, i got dressed and i ran over to [name]'s as fast as i could and then i just stopped in the middle of the street at three in the morning and thought, ‘what the fuck am i doing with my life?’

“you're joking me? because if you are joking me, that is massively harsh.”

“oh, let me get a song up on youtube. you're going to absolutely love this, [name]. here we go… listen to this. oh, for fuck's sake, advert.”

“let's go down the pub and get shitfaced.”

“where do i see myself in five years? well, me and [name] will have a flat in the middle of the village and all of our furniture will be inflatable and we'll have cable and it will pay for itself, because we're going to use the spare room to breed quails, because their eggs are worth fucking shitloads.”

“is this about the calippo, still? because you offered to buy me that.”

“if he wants to go, good luck to him, i say. i reckon he thinks that i can't live without him, which is a laugh, because he went a whole weekend away once and i got on all right. i just ended up following this cat around the village.”

“i've got to do what's right for me, at the end of the day, instead of worrying about other people.”

“how about you say sorry? sorry for the massive knife that's hanging out the back of my back because of you.”

“oh, and while you're stabbing me in the back, feel free to bend down and kiss my arse.”

“can i just ask you an honest question? why would you want to leave the village when we've got a pub and a shop?”

“i think you don't know how lucky we have it to be doing nothing with our lives, like. we're all going to die, anyway, so what's the point in doing anything?”

“i want ownership of the words fucknut and dickmilk.”

“i had this come through the post. and i've got a few concerns about it. firstly, this guy on the front looks really arrogant. not the sort of guy i was expecting, if i'm honest.”

“this is starting to stress me out a little bit.”

“why are you trying to stress me out? you know i'm already stressed out as it is.”

“the bloke that used to live in there, right, kept hearing strange noises coming out of his attic at night. and he'd go to the fridge and find that food was missing from the fridge. so he thought, ‘i'm just going to go up to the attic and check this out.’ and he found an entire family of peruvian panpipe buskers just living up there. and he thought ‘i'm just going to leave them to it, ‘cos they're not really doing me any harm.’ and then, a few years later, he thought, "well, i'll just go up to the attic to check on them. ‘see if they're all right.’ and it turned out they'd all died of asbestos poisoning. yeah, he doesn't live here any more.”

“some people will always be scared of me, and i can't change that, no matter how nice i am. but there's a balance to be had between being nice and being feared.”

“don't really like catching up. it's not my thing.”

“i just watched this video of this girl doing a random act of kindness on youtube. she basically paid for this old man's shopping at the till. and this old man was, like, about 90 years old. and he's so fucking old, like, you could see through his skin. and he just starts bawling his eyes out. he's like, ‘you're fucking joking me, this ain't fucking real life.’ i just thought... i want to make someone feel like that. ‘cos that's... i really… that's what i want to do.”

“i'm not dead. just can't be arsed to text her sometimes.”

“you know, correct me if i'm wrong, but four texts a day is complete madness. no-one can keep up with that.”

“i am doing kind things selfishly.”

“i was at midnight mass one year, right, someone got tipped off i was there. as i was coming out the church, someone tries to shoot me with a crossbow.”

“well, i haven't seen the film, have i? that's why i came here - to watch the fucking film - like a normal human being.”

“i've made an effort by coming here tonight. i didn't want to come.”

“i had to wheel him here from his house in an asda trolley, cos he was just too heartbroken to move.”

“sometimes you don't know what you got until you ain't got it any more. like blockbuster's. i just took 'em for granted - and then, one day, gone, and you spend ages trying to figure out what went wrong, and then you realise it was your fault all along.”

“i thought you said you wanted to fix things.”

“she wanted it to go that way, and it just wasn't gonna go that way. she even got me thinking that they'd get back together… ..but that's manipula.... manipulative people... do that. and he's better off without her.”

“that wasn't much to write home about.”

“it's fucking dead, isn't it?”

“basically, somebody's been sending me threatening letters, and i don't know who's doing it - and i am concerned, because my peripheral vision is poor, so, if somebody attacks me from the sides or snipes at me from an upstairs window, i am fucked - but my hearing is excellent, see? so i just need to spend a few days inside honing my sonar, and i'll be fine then.”

“if you don't like the work, the circus is in town and they're always looking for clowns.”

“his soul is just going to crumble to dust.”

“this really is not a good situation for me. a physical threat is something that i can deal with, but a sexual thing is not my area of expertise.”

“just really fucked in the head, mate.”

“what have i done? i haven't done anything wrong.”

“do you know how sad that is? that is so, actually, sad. that makes me sad for you, that you can't take a joke.”

“i think i just got a bit carried away with the whole thing.”

“your finger's going up my arsehole, mate.”

“i'll hold the back of your head, so you don't bash yourself.”

“when i lie in future, i don't want a massive lecture on how bad lying is, cos deep down, you're the worst of us all, mate.”

“i'd quite like a coke.”

“it's going to be like gluing a breadstick back together, because… like, as if a breadstick's been in a blender and it's all… ...the pieces smashed up.”

“like, this one time i started a fight club in the village hall, and i got a black eye from beating myself up. but it made my enemies think, ‘fuck, if she can do that to herself, what the fuck can she do to me?’”

“i'm absolutely 1,000% sure i've broken it in two places.”

“i knew this day would come.”

“i should be in tk maxx, getting the bargains that i deserve.”

“unlike you, [name], i'm not a fashion disaster.”

“i'm still warm in my grave, and she's sucking off the pallbearer.”

“you know, it took me ten years to get over [name], and i only went out with her for half a day.”

“i swear to god, if i see him here again, i swear to god, i will have no hesitation in just going up to him and just planting one on his face.”

“right, then keep your nose out of my business, yeah? nosy old cock-womble.”

“[name]’s attitude to me is puzzling. if i walk past her in the street

and say hi, she'll tell me to fuck off. yet every year, she sends me a really sweet, nice christmas card. you know, there's just no consistency there.”

“he's good-looking up close, isn't he?”

“don't show me any weakness, because i will take advantage.”

“no, put the brick down, you fucking psychopath.”

“when i asked him, he just said, ‘come to my office now,’ which means we're in the fucking shit, cos we're always in fucking shit.”

“i shouldn't be paying you at all.”

“i've always had a son. i talk about him all the time.”

“he's my son. he's not my dog.”

“it reminds me of the wicker man. i don't really know why.”

“i just find it weird how you can be so close to someone and they can be such a big part of your life, and then the next minute, you're just sort of strangers in the night.”

“i don't want the emotional implications.”

“well, about five years ago, i sold my birthday to my mum for about 200 quid, which means my mum's legally entitled now to never celebrate my birthday ever again for the rest of my life. not even, like, a happy birthday cup of tea, or a moonpig card, nothing - which is the worst decision i ever made in my entire life.”

“he deserves that anyway, because he's been sexting my nan, so…”

“what's this surprise? cos i need to know whether it's going to be worth this walk.”

“i always see them banners above the motorway, and i always thought, ‘who the fuck does them?’ well, now i know. people like me.”

“did you know you can't get stung by a stinging nettle if you grab the leaf top and bottom, like that? it's only when you touch it on the sides, it stings. agh, actually, that stung, then.”

“pez dispenser, they're cursed. they are, i'm not even joking. honestly, when i had one of them, i had the worst bout of bad luck i ever had in my life.”

“i swear down, it's a short cut. it might be a pleasant walk, we might enjoy it.”

“i'm not scared of the fox twins. i'd just like to sit them down and ask 'em plainly, ‘look, guys, what is going on? ‘cos this has just gotten completely out of hand now. you know, stop walking on your knuckles, stand up straight, be the best version of you that you can be. get a job, even. there's a trolley boy who works at tesco's, you know, who may as well have been raised by wolves. if he can get a job, you guys can walk it.’”

“yes, there has been talk of strange goings-on in the woods, ghost sightings and the like. but… ...they're never from particularly reliable sources.”

“i live with a ghost. there's a ghost in that house. he's like a civil war cavalier, with all the hair and the hat and all that. and every time i walk into the living room, he doffs his cap. and on his shoulder, he's got this crow that barks at me. it means i spend less time in the house, really. not because of him, because he's-he's quite peaceable. but the crow is malevolent. and i'm not having that. i can't share my house with a malevolent bird.”

“that's haunted as fuck.”

“am i going mad here, or does that, to you, look like that's where just ghost will hang out all the time?”

“look at him, little red riding twat.”

“if he's got an attitude with me, i swear to god, i'll just grab the steering wheel and drive us all into a wall.”

“it's a bit annoying, actually. cos this is not the first or the second time i've had to tell you, really, is it?”

“his sparkle has just gone.”

“you know my dad actually wrote the song wonderwall on the back of a beer mat in the space of ten minutes, don't you?”

“i've just got a tiny, tiny, tiny little favour to ask you.”

“when i think of [name], i think of someone who is very loyal. and very, very stupid. sort of more stupid than loyal. sort of 70% stupid, 30% loyal, probably. because she's very loyal. but extremely stupid.”

“do you know what? i actually don't think he loves you at all and i don't think he's ever loved you.”

“all right, that's harsh and unnecessary, but fine.”

“frankly, she is behaving like the antichrist.”

“i literally just got here.”

“you are such an unemotional slab of ham, [name].”

“i've got so much shit on that man you would not believe.”

“there's something in my eye.”

“i just can't quit him, you know?”

“yeah, we might have a fiery relationship,  but when we're together, it's just… it's just pure chemistry, isn't it?”

“i'm not proud of it, believe me. but at the end of the day, i'm a very vindictive person, you know? it is what makes me me.”

“i basically went out and bought an alpaca off gumtree for £500. of all the mistakes i've made in my life, that was possibly the largest. definitely the physically largest.”

“yeah, i really don't wanna talk about that.”

“her only loyalty is to herself, staffies, and the tv channel dave… ...which, in my opinion, is a tv channel made by knuckle-draggers for knuckle-draggers.”

“i can't move on till i've seeked revenge, unfortunately.”

“if that was in france, that would be fine, but we're not in france.”

“the only thing we had in common, really, was stealing, and that was more my thing that i got him onto. but it just goes to show, you know, some friendships last and some friendships don't, but that's just the way it is.”

“you know it was me that got you sacked, don't you?”

“the thing i learnt about friendship is, you gotta accept each other's flaws, no matter how toxic they may be.”

“shit-stirring from beyond the grave.”

#rp meme #rp prompt #rp starters #rp sentence meme #rp sentence starters #this is the nichest meme ive made #but this show is so fucking funny okay

[chekhovs-harpoon]

my favorite thing about arthur and john is that both of them keep flip flopping between "YES BLOODY MURDER I CHOOSE VIOLENCE🔪🩸🪓" mode and "WE CAN'T DO MURDER THAT'S MEAN 🥺 WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU😠" mode but their modes never sync up so they just constantly argue and bicker abt whether or not they can justifiably do violence this time like

[ ID 1: Two pictures of the character Moomintroll from the animated series The Moomins. The first image has him calmly folding a switchknife. This is labeled "John." He is holding a knife up with the blade out, a determined and angry facial expression in the second image. He is labeled "Arthur.

ID 2: The exact same image as the first one, but the labels have been reversed. The Moomintroll calmly folding a switchknife is the one labelled with "Arthur," while the one where he is holding a knife up is labelled "John." End ID ]

#malevolent podcast #podcast blogging #knife cw

[groundpear]

Six characters challenge!

Ideas from friends! What do they mean? ID: A template with six spaces arranged in two rows and three columns. The title is: "give me six characters that remind you of me and I will draw them!". The six colored bust sketches are: Doctor Julian Bashir as an anthropomorphic aoudad, smiling; Moomin, closing a knife, with suspicious expression; Doctor McCoy as an anthropomorphic opossum holding a chemichal and with his usual annoyed expression; the Pokémon Rattata waving his paws with angry expression; Duo, an owl facing directly the viewer; an Data as and anthropomorphic Merino ram with a peaceful and curious expression. End ID. 🌟 Commission prices and terms of service @ my Carrd! (January/February 2022) . . . 🌟 Where to find me: deviantArt | FurAffinity | Telegram channel | Tumblr | Twitter

#groundpear #furry #furryart #furry art #azpainter3 #deep space nine #ds9 #startrek #star trek #star trek ds9 #star trek deep space nine #tng #the next generation #star trek tng #star trek tos #startrektos #bashir #doctor bashir #julian bashir #aoudad #goat #moomin #leonard mccoy #dr mccoy #mccoy #opossum #rattata #pokemon #duo #duolingo