#mostly bc my drawing tablet was being a piece of SHIT

[datura-tea]

holy shit this year marks 10 years of this blog and moz!! i can't remember the exact date i started posting here - my archive says i have one post from november 2013 but let's disregard that - but i do remember it was around late 2014/early 2015 :)

^ one of the very first moz art pieces i ever drew, for fallout week 2015!!

memories and art through the years under a read more bc it got long

2014 → baby's first rpg!! i started playing fnv on my cousin's jailbroken xbox late 2013 and finished mid 2014 and i loved every minute of it. i remember waking up at 8am and playing almost nonstop until 2am the next day haha!

i didn't play moz on my first playthrough - but i did start creating a character that would eventually become her: a shorthaired ex-boxer who punched her way through obstacles when diplomacy failed. i remember she spent a lot of time with boone. i liked him then, because he saved my ass more times than i can count. but i digress. this is draft 1 moz essentially

2015 → this is the year that i was doing my thesis so i could graduate but i was so depressed and stressed about it that i distracted myself by replaying fnv on pc, where i played through the dlcs for the first time. i fell in love with the dlcs' oversarching story; particularly ulysses, who i became obssessed with, especially since i couldn't find any content of him at the time. in the game, i played as moz; i had most of her personality and choices down, but her backstory was still up in the air.

fun fact: this was an existing sideblog that i remade to be a fallout blog so i could look for ulysses content, and when i couldn't find any, i made some myself, featuring moz as my main courier six. originally, i didn't ship them, but eventually i ended the year as a courier/ulysses otp shipper.

this was the year i started drawing digitally - my uncle let me borrow a drawing tablet and i used an old copy of photoshop i pirated hehe

2016 → i graduated this year!! and promptly fell deeper into my depression. this was the year that it got so bad that i had to be medicated. through it all, this blog and moz and ulysses and my fandom friends were with me. and for that i am truly grateful :) this was the year i figured out how to lock transparent pixels so that i could color my lineart lol

2017 → i started hammering out moz's backstory this year i think. there's a lot of sketches of her and her family in my files. i experimented with shading and backgrounds here but that experimentation was pretty short-lived

2018 → i started using references seriously!!!! i did a lot of oc on oc kissing this year, featuring mostly moz and many friend ocs haha

2019 → didn't draw much this year. actually this year was a blur and i can't remember much from it except from it being the year of my terrible no good bad copywriting jobs... anyway i did manage to continue my courier/ulysses brainrot and make this piece, which i'm still proud of

2020 → pandemic time. i spent a lot of time asleep at home and i think this was also the year i started doing commissions?? shoutout to anyone who has ever commissioned me - thank you so much, i truly appreciate it!!

2021 → i switched from my old-ass pirated photoshop to clip studio paint and never looked back. also i did a bunch of commissions for my grandmother's surgery, which failed, and i distracted myself from the sadness by drawing my ocs over and over and playing disco elysium

2022 → by this year, i've got moz down pat and have started vaguely developing other ocs instead. but she's still always at the back of my mind

2023 → i bought new brushes from true grit texture supply and immediately found new favorites that i started using for everything. i tentatively started incorporating background elements in some pieces!

2024 → while it's still too early to say where this year will lead me art-wise, i will say that i started experimenting in realistic paint studio (which i bought in 2021, the same time as clip studio paint) a few days ago and i'm liking the results so far. we'll see!

all in all, these last 10 years have been quite a ride, but i'm glad i stuck around and i'm glad you guys stuck around too!! much much love 💖💖💖

#shh peri shhh #god. look at that old art... i took the ones that i still kinda liked but the rest... #well i don't hate them. but they're old and of their time and i wish i could redo them lmao #my art #moz

[seahdalune]

Seana’s 2020 art highlights (a thread)

(Note: this is a reupload of a thread i did on twitter a few years back. so these are really old.)

January: i didn’t draw anything complete that month.... closest thing i could find to finished is this art i made of my OC, Angelord. man. remember when i drew my OCs? [2023 note: it's..... funny you say that. you would try to start up an original comic for the entirety of next year.... not that it ever came to fruition.]

February: i finished Link’s Awakening that month. i drew Marin bc i thought she was cute. i wish i could get motivated to draw fanart of recent video games i finished more... this is probably the last proper traditional art i made this year... after this, it’s mostly digital.

March: look. i’m attempting anatomy... and i failed lol. i remember being like “how do you draw woman” after drawing this... i mean. i still wanna know how to draw woman, so i guess i haven’t changed lol. [2023 note: I STILL DONT KNOW HOW TO DRAW WOMEN]

April: wait NVM here’s another traditional piece i made this year. he was an adoptable i made... but nobody was interested in them so he’s with me for now. i’ll try and redesign them, either to sell them or to keep him. [2023 note: i never sold this guy.... i was lazy and nobody values points these days. probs for the best because scamming children with virtual coins is probably not a good idea lmao. at the same time, i wish there was an easy way to buy and sell designs+commissions without having to get a credit card or paypal or something.]

May: another month where i didn’t draw anything. buuut i did some plush sketches to reference so das dat. [2023 note: you'll probably be able to name most charas here, but who's the guy i drew the most? that's Matteo, he's a little pink vampire and i made him through Gatcha Life.]

June: ah. the month where i started digital art. this was fanart for my friend’s OC. i didn’t know a lot of features of digital art so it looks like shit LOL not the first digital art i made ever, but it might as well be. [2023 note: i actually received my tablet around 2018, but i never had time to draw on it because i had 1 hour of screentime every day. this restriction was finally lifted in 2020 (because online classes) and i finally had time to venture out into the world of digital art...]

July: i made a lot of stuff this month, but to shorten the list... i finished the plush of my OC, Matteo. i wanna make another plushie... maybe with Suitcase.

this was also the month i joined the OSC... oh hell. it’s been 6 months?? [2023 note: 2 YEARS BITCH. ITS GONNA BE YOUR 3RD ANNIVERSARY if i didn't get so tired and started to hate the community so much.]

August: ...ergh. lets get over with this month quickly... Object OCs this. Object OCs that.

occasional Algebians.

i do not like the art here... it really shows that i’ve improved. ok let’s get outta here. [2023 note: i fucking despise the person who asked me why "they were old" to my humanizations of the Dangos. this is why i refuse to join another public server ever again and might have contributed to the delay of my human drawing skills.]

September: lots of Taco II. i seriously liked her a lot. still do, but the love is a bit more spread out between characters.

oh. and i watched ONE that month. cool.

October: i finally found a style that i could weld. hooyah.

don’t ask why i drew my friend as a cat maid... i thought it was funny ok.

September: the month of gift art. nothing else to say, but i like the thin lines. yes, ‘thin’. ...god i need to think of better things to say. [i would then realize i said the wrong month, and unlike tumblr, i cannot edit tweets once published, so my only option was to delete the whole thing and start over. or just say this:] did i just say September... oh for fucks- no i am not fixing this i’m already tired of this just imagine i said November ok

December: best art of this year so far (doh) nothing to say. just... happy that i improved. can’t wait to improve even more.

[hey look! i was in the 2020 JnJ christmas video! thats me! me!!]

aaand, that’s all for this year! man, i thought i was done with improvement. i can’t believe i proved myself wrong. usually other people do that for me lol. lets see if i can disprove myself again in 2021.

#dalune recap 2020 #dalune recap

[lieu-rey]

ozma stans pspspsps

#rwby #ozma #ozpin #professor ozpin #immortal!ozma #i was like yeah imma just paint smth. just a lil quick smth. and then i spent five hours on it #mostly bc my drawing tablet was being a piece of SHIT #my art #lieurey

[thepoetdraws]

i hope this doesn’t sound rude or anything but i’ve been following your art progress for a while and i just wanted to comment on just how much you’ve improved these last couple of years. even though your stuff has always been amazing to me i still feel like you’ve come leaps and bounds from where you started and i’m really proud of you for it. you really inspire me to keep at my own art and i just wanted to thank you for that.

That’s not rude AT ALL, it’s a completely lovely thing to say! Thank you so much. My learning over the past- wow, year and three, four months now? Since I got my wacom? (Think I started around Jan 2017…) Has been a source of a lot of joy for me. 

Here’s more backstory than I bet you wanted (under a cut bc loooong): 

I drew a ton when I was in my teens. I was constantly filling up notebooks, mostly with manga art and little silly cartoons about me and my friends. I wasn’t great, but I wasn’t terrible. I shared them with my loved ones and made them laugh, and drawing made me happy. 

Then I got depressed. Really depressed. My perfectionist tendencies went through the roof and most of my energy went to things that were Absolutely Necessary. I distinctly remember being in my first or second year of uni and dusting off my sketch pad for the first time in months and months- because this used to make me happy, right? I used to enjoy this? And ending in tears an hour later because the lines wouldn’t come out like I wanted and everything looked terrible. It was too frustrating. I didn’t draw a thing for about 5 years. I didn’t write for fun. I did career-building-work-study-related-activities or slept. 

Eventually things got bad enough that circumstances forced me to got help. Nothing happens quickly, of course, but after two-ish years of gradually improving, I woke up one day and… Bought a totally frivolous video game. And played it. Beginning to end. And loved it. 

And then when it was finished, I didn’t want that feeling to end, so I went to look for fanfiction of the game. There wasn’t a lot of it. “Well,” I said to myself, “I guess I have to write it then.” So I did. I sat down and wrote 50,000 words in a month and had more fun than I’d had in years. 

By the time I finished that, ao3 readers had directed me to Tumblr where the Fandom Was Happening, and I got to see the amazing fanart that exists in droves on this platform. “I could maybe do that,” I thought to myself. Part of my brain screeched at me that it would be terrible and stressful, but I wanted to try. 

It came out badly. It looked wrong. But… Then I shared it with an online fandom friend that I had made and they said kind things about it. So I bought a sketch pad and drew another piece. It was a bit better. And another. I got brave and posted a picture of my art. People were friendly again. This is fun, I remember thinking, and this third piece is so much better than my first! 

Three months later, I invested in a tablet. I’d always wanted to try digital art. And then I started this art blog. Every single time I went to post something, I’d have to fight through my JerkBrain wailing at me that it was terrible, that I would look back on it and hate it, and that everyone would laugh at me. I knew intellectually that Practice Is Necessary and you have to first be bad at something in order to become good at it, but try telling that to Depression LOL. 

But you know what? The more I posted, the easier it got. “This one isn’t great,” I would think, “but I like having a record of what I tried to do, and it makes me feel good to have a benchmark for progress later”. People gave me really useful feedback and help or directed me to resources that helped me learn. And most of all, nothing bad happened. I drew something! It was shit! And it was fine. Sometimes things had to be just finished instead of complete, and that was okay. I didn’t have a panic attack. The sky didn’t fall. I just… Drew something that wasn’t great, learned, and moved forward. This shouldn’t be monumental or significant, but for me, it shifted the earth. 

Tl;dr: when people say something like, “wow, you were Not That Great before but you have become Much Better!”, it makes me want to crow with happiness. Because I’m still not that good at art and learning new things every day, but guess what? I can still enjoy drawing. This is a freedom that I was never, ever allowed to have while I dragged myself around under the shitty yoke of depression. 

Let us all go forth and be bad at things!! 

P.S. I still have bad days ofc, but eh, so does everybody. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

#asks #about me

[uniformbravo]

bloop heres a post abt my 3-day trip to san diego B)

this was just gonna be a list of highlights but i ended up talking about a lot so it’s more like a Kind Of The Highlights But I Got A Little Carried Away list

it was a 2 hr drive so i put on some tunes & forced everyone in the car to listen to my thousands of anime ops and piano covers it was *fire emoji* (im not on mobile)

at the end jaelin said she couldn’t hear it the whole time rip

made myself carsick looking at mob psycho memes while we looked for a parking spot at the museum for 20 minutes (it was worth it they were good memes)

the museum we went to had a whole gaming thing going on where they just had a shitload of games out for ppl to play & one of them was just dance projected onto like an entire wall basically & i mean i didnt play but it was fun watching my mom try her best 

she played against two of my sisters who both beat her by more than double her score hgdhgksd bye mom

got a nauseating headache in the science museum & took the opportunity to sit down & look at more mob psycho memes for 35 minutes while the advil kicked in

felt better by the time we went to see this fuckin movie about national parks in the us but idk it was like. the whole reason my mom wanted to go to san diego was to see this movie bc they were getting rid of it soon & after seeing it i can see why they’re taking it out kjgkdjgksd like!!! it would’ve been cool if it told u shit about the parks like fauna and flora shit but it had this dumb little narrative abt these three campers traveling to each park & fucking around & i looked over at jaelin at one point & she was asleep & i was like same

im being too hard on it, it was kind of interesting to watch and had some cool visuals but the acting was pretty embarrassing & unnecessary, i wish it would’ve tried to be a documentary instead of entertaining. that’s my Professional Review of this random movie they’re removing forever soon, hope u enjoyed

realized i had more free time at the hotel than i thought i would & v heavily regretted not bringing my tablet to draw aaaaaahhhhh it was ok tho bc i brought my big sketchbook so i just drew in there B)

i’ve been drawing a lot of terukis i think i accidentally discovered a hidden love for him on the midnight shores of the san diego bay

(what i actually discovered is that he’s v easy to project a rly specific part of myself onto hgkdgksdjkgjsdk)

rented bikes to ride by the bay & it was super fun bc i havent ridden a bike in a long time but like. the second half started getting really hard for me & i thought i was just weak shit bc i literally never exercise but then i realized my back tire had gone flat hfdjghsd my legs were..... so sore

also the seat was shaped weird so my ass was sore for the rest of the trip. it’s still sore tbh. i have a bruised ass

went to a model train museum which was pretty cool bc the little towns had little people & jaelin and i were making up stories for them (my favorite recurring joke was pointing out ppl that had fallen over & calling them dead)

after the trains we made a spur-of-the-moment decision to stay a third day to see more museum shit bc why not so we managed to grab a room at a new hotel and #Locked In our decision

on the way to the second hotel we got a flat tire so i was like convinced i was cursed bc wtf it was literally on the same day???

while we waited for the tire repair i got a pink lemonade from taco bell and it was amazing i can’t believe i ever thought piece of shit sprite was worth even looking at over this

ok so i need to talk about the second hotel we stayed at because it was... literally the fanciest hotel i have ever stayed at in my entire 22 year old life

it was a mariott?? but a fuckin Fancy Mariott ok first of all we were on the 19th floor which just..... what the fuck

floor level was the 6th floor, this bitch went underground (though that might have just been the parking garage idk)

the lobby bathroom was like. jesus christ. to flush the toilet u wave ur hand over a sensor??? what’s wrong with just automatic toilets???? why are these toilets so extra????? i couldn’t even get it to work for so long jgkjdkgsd i hate technology

also there were moist towelettes sitting in a neatly folded pile by the sinks like what even. i thought it was paper towels but then it was wet

the lobby also had this fancy-ass bar/lounge where they served starbucks but u had to have a room key to get in i think

in the elevators to get to the rooms you can’t even enter the floor level until you hold your key card against a sensor like what the fuck..... we had to get some strangers to tell us how to do it gjdks i bet if we hadn’t been able to figure it out the elevator wouldve just dropped us 12 floors to our death like Access Denied, Assholes

the room itself was super fucking cramped tho which makes sense like if im gonna be able to afford anything at a place like this u better believe it’s gonna be the size of a damn peanut. it was the fanciest peanut ive ever seen in my life tho

the view was uhh we were directly across from some tall office building so at night u could like see into all the rooms it was kinda cool but also weird

there was a jar of hershey’s kisses on the coffee table when we got there but it was dark chocolate so like get the fuck outta here with that shit how dare you assault Mine Eyes (i ate like 4)

it rly was a tiny room tho and it didnt help that there were 5 of us rip... like there was a main room and a bedroom and a bathroom and already that’s making it sound bigger than it was hgkdjgskd 

but even tho it was small it had a lot like.. there was a kitchenette that was big enough for like 1 person to stand there but it had a fridge/freezer, sink, dishwasher, toaster, microwave, cupboards & coffeemaker like there was so much shit crammed in there, this wasn’t no minimalist living space it was just. a lot crammed into one tiny floor plan

anyway yeah it was really bizarre for me to be in a place like that & i just constantly felt like i didn’t belong there but that was mostly my anxiety lol i really dont like being in fancy places in general idk. it was still kinda fun tho

the natural history museum was cool, they had a bunch of animal skulls & taxidermy which i thought was pretty neat. all their dinosaur stuff was in the basement tho which u had to pay extra to see which like. bye

they did have some cool movies tho, they were like nature documentaries, one on marine biology around baja california and the other on animals of the galapagos & those were pretty neat, way better than that national parks shit we saw at the science center jgkdjkskdkdjg 

ok so this one’s more of a buildup over the 3 days so im gonna give a lil 3-part summary

day 1: we went to panda express for dinner & i had leftovers so i was like “sweet im saving these for when we get home” (bc the hotel had a fridge right)

day 2: got a rly good burger from a vegan place, my brother got the same one but didnt want his second half so i was like “cool more leftovers im gonna have so much good food when we get home this is perfect”

day 3: fucKIGN LEFT BOTH CONTAINERS IN THE FRIDGE ACCIDENTALLY WHEN WE CHECKED OUT HKDJFLSKDG i was literally so good about it the first two days like when we switched hotels i made sure not to forget them and i held onto them & everything & then halfway through the third day i was like “SHIT”

it’s ok tho bc for dinner that 3rd day we did panda again & i got the same thing so i have the same leftovers again hehehehehe

ok i think that’s basically everything & im not just saying that bc it’s 1:45 am and ive been working on this for like an hour and a half at this point.,.,. overall it was pretty fun, i think i liked the bikes & those animal movies the best... also the drive out bc i got to play my music lmfao (i love sharing my music ok)

anyway the end thank u

#retag later #today posts #oops this is rly long but uhh it was all over the course of 3 days so its fine

[aclockworkqueer]

Eyyyy I was tagged by @dogtracksjacks so ty for that, gaybag

1: Are you named after someone?

Yes! My first name, Hannah, is the name of my late grandmother. My middle name, Jean/Jeanette is my Nan’s name.

2: When was the last time you cried?  

 I’m a huge crybaby and cry at anything remotely threatening, but the last time I cried was...Saturday I think? Basically, I had a dream that my dog died and I woke up in tears bc I love my little old lady.

3: Do you like your handwriting?

Ehhh, not really, other people say they like it but I think it’s just messy. I find that it looks a lot better when I write with pen or when I’m using my tablet to write.

4: What is your favorite lunch meat?

This is a weird one :/  What counts as a lunch meat?? Does tuna count? If so, then probably tuna.

5: Do you have kids?

 Not atm. My mother seems to think that I’ll never want any kids but to be honest, I’m not sure. When Ninja Brian posts videos of Audrey I think that having kids would be a super good time and stuff but then I see other videos of kids being pieces of shit and I’m put off by the idea. But I wouldn’t rule it out, you know??

6: If you were another person, would you be friends with you?

 Well, I try to be a nice person, I wouldn’t say I’m particularly difficult to get along with so I think I would.

7: Do you use sarcasm?

 Mate, at this point I can’t even tell if I’m being serious or being sarcastic anymore.

8: Do you still have your tonsils?

 Despite the fact that I’ve had tonsillitis like 3 times, I still have them. (btw tonsillitis medicine is so gross, it tastes like eating orange peels >~< )

9: Would you bungee jump?

 Eh why not? YOLO, I’ve already done cliff jumping which is basically bungee jumping without the bungee.

10: What is your favorite kind of cereal?

 I don’t really eat cereal that much anymore, but I do like Country Crisp which is basically just cereal clusters that taste super good and some dried up strawberries that rehydrate in the milk. Side note: Is it weird that I like cereal but not milk? I just kind of tip the milk off my spoon...

11: Do you untie your shoes when you take them off?

 If I can, usually. My Vans are normally pretty easy to kick off but with my converse it’s always a little harder so I have to untie them instead.

12: Do you think you’re a strong person?

 Physically not really. I mean, I can have bursts of adrenaline where I suddenly become pretty strong for a little while but mostly I’m pretty squishy and bruise if someone so much as touches me with slight force.

 Mentally, again, not really. If someone raises their voice or w/e I get upset pretty easily and I can sometimes get upset if people say nice things to me too? I’m just a big ol’ crybaby

13: What is your favourite ice cream? Ever, ever?

Oh FUCK this is a hard one. It’s definitely something Ben & Jerry’s but it’s so hard to decide. I really love their chocolate flavours and like my sister I usually have Phish Food, but I’m really fond of Cookie Dough and Chocolate fudge brownie, so I usually just have a double or triple scoop so I can just have a bit of everything and not have to choose a favourite.

14: What is the first thing you notice about people?

 Hmm, I don’t really know, probably something really obvious like the shape of their face of how tall they are compared to me or whatever, but I don’t really remember what I notice first. 

15: What is the least favorite physical thing you like about yourself?

 Ok where do I start? I don’t really like my posture because I sort of slouch but my neck leans forward a bit and I look pretty weird (Or maybe it’s nothing and I’m an idiot), I don’t like the way my school uniform looks on me, the shirts are always too baggy and make me look bigger than I am and idk I just hate the way I look in school in general. I wish I didn’t have so many spots, despite the fact that I use spot cream twice a day and uugghhh idk I’m just not really happy with my appearance most of the time.

16: What color pants and shoes are you wearing now?

 Blue with pink and white tartan Pyjama bottoms

17: What are you listening to right now?

  I’m not sure if this really counts, but I’m watching brutalmoose’s video on Shadow the Hedgehog

18: If you were a crayon, what color would you be?

 Hmm, maybe a shade of blue or green? Teal?? Turquoise maybe??? (are turquoise crayons a thing?)

19: Favorite smell?

  I like weird smells like burning wood, petrol and the smell of DIY stores? Freshly cut grass is another good one and I guess it’s kind of natural for people to like the smell of their own houses?

20: Who was the last person you spoke to on the phone?

 My grandfather probs, when I was asking him to come and pick me up from drama class.

21: Favorite sport to watch?

 Ehh, I’m not really a sports person, but I do like watching videos of all different kinds of martial arts? I just like the way their bodies move and stuff

22: Hair color?

 Naturally my hair is a dark blonde/ almost brown? But right now I’ve dyed it white ^0^

23: Eye color?

 They started off bright blue but as the years have gone on they’ve kind of turned a sort of green?

24: Do you wear contacts?

 nnnnnope

25: Favorite food to eat?

 Fucking cheesecake lad. Love that shit

26: Scary movies or comedy?

  I’ve gotten more into scary movies lately but unfortunately most horror films these days are pretty shitty. I do like a good comedy though, but it’s got to be...y’know, actually funny and not something really half-assed.

27: Last movie you watched?

Errm, I’m not to sure... I think it might have been the Tempest in school?

28: What color of shirt are you wearing?

 Confession time, it’s a white shirt with the Union jack on it and a picture of England from Hetalia. I used to really love Hetalia but I’ve sort of lost interest over the years, any shirts I own from things that I’m not really interested in anymore turn into pyjamas basically.

29: Summer or winter?

Summer probs, it’s nice and warm and I don’t feel as bad for staying up all night.

  30: Hugs or kisses?

Don’t get enough of either to really form an opinion?

31: What book are you currently reading?

Does the Highway Code count? I’m learning to drive so that book is kind of a necessity

32: Who do you miss right now?

Nobody fam

33: What is on your mouse pad?

Don’t have one fam

34: What is the last TV program you watched?

 I’m super into Samurai Jack atm, I’m just rewatching all the episodes from my childhood to refresh my memory for when season 5 comes out. Hype!!!

35: What is the best sound?

  Yeah, I gotta agree with my sister on this one, ps1 start up sound is orgasmic. Basically anything from the ps1 sounds fresh af. I really like the theme song from the first Tomb Raider game, I love how lonely and mysterious it sounds and hearing it always takes me back to when I was a little kid watching my dad play Tomb Raider in the living room.

36: Rolling stones or The Beatles

 Beatles for sure. Despite them being way before my time, my parents had a copy of the Yellow Submarine movie on VHS which we would watch pretty much all the time (even though the imagery kinda gave me nightmares) so that sort of sparked my love for them and it’s probably why Sargent Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band is my favourite album of theirs (plus some songs from Revolver).

37: What is the furthest you have ever traveled?

 We went to Spain when I was about 6-ish (give or take), but we’re planning on organising some kind of road trip around the USA for the future so that’ll be fun.

38: Do you have a special talent?

 Err, I guess drawing is one?? Although I’m not amazing at it. I supposed singing and acting and whatever is kind of another one???? Idk man, what counts as a “special” talent??

Anybody can do this if they want but I guess I’ll tag @spongeson and @kritz-blitzwitz since I can’t think of anymore off the top of my head, do it if you want to, ignore it if you don’t, it doesn’t matter

#long post #there fixed it #I think