#moving away

[celestesinsight]

January 17, 2024!

It's not an easy feat, packing your entire life in few bags and leaving behind the only home you have known. Especially for someone like me, who have never left home for hostel or anything. But sometimes, leaving is necessary for growth. I need to get out of my comfort zone, then only I can achieve my true potential and know what I am actually capable of.

#diary post #january diaries #odiablr #desiblr #desi tumblr #leaving home #moving away #starting a new chapter #new life in new city #new life

[musings-n-museums]

for immigrant daughters + for my grandma

sa hindi pag-alala by munimuni || pinterest || biyaheng pier 1963 (pinterest) || the true meaning of nostaglia (the new yorker) drawn by eleni kalorkoti || part of your world by alan menken (the little mermaid) || godspeed by frank ocean || manila street scene (1954) taken by ed_mola / eduardo de leon || ruth 1:16 from the bible || white ferrari by frank ocean || everything everywhere all at once directed by daniel Kwan and daniel scheinert

#web weaving #filipino music #poem #spilled poetry #spilled thoughts #web weave #immigrant daughter #filipino #asian poetry #immigration #poetry #writing #writeblr #poetryblr #poetry blog #poetic #on love #on sorrow #on growing up #growing up #moving away #life #nostalgia #southeast asia #web weavings #webweaving

[cynicalcharisma]

leaving ur country does feel surreal at times. like i have looked forward to this day where i’d leave the violence and trauma behind (at least physically if not emotionally). now that it's coming near i have so much cold feet. maybe i don't want to leave. maybe i’ll miss the food, the weather, the language, and so much more.

#migrants #mental health #chaotic academia #mentally drained #desi tag #burnout #desi tumblr #desi stuff #desiblr #desi girl #desi people #being desi #desi culture #desi dark academia #desi chaotic academia #international student #moving out #moving away #homesick

[strrywitxofthewest]

Though nothing will keep us together We could steal time just for one day We can be heroes for ever and ever What d'you say?

— Heroes, David Bowie

A love letter to the friends I've made and loved and lost and reconnected. You will all forever be inextricable to me.

#web weaving #web weave #webweave #right person wrong time #small town blues #found family #insecurity #longing #loneliness #moving away #friendship #tiredness #saudade #a house in nebraska #sun bleached flies #unrequited affection #pining #yearning #Spotify

[hekate-writes]

Growing up and moving away from the people you knew and loved feels so weird. It's like,

i know everything that breaks your heart and exactly the way it breaks, so much so that I can trace every crack and put it back piece by piece

But we're on different paths now as the wheel of time takes us to different ends, i can't be around to watch your heart shatter nor to put it back

But know one thing, that even from miles away, i remember the way your heart breaks, and i remember how to put it back together just as easily as i remember to breathe

#mine #moving away #moving abroad #moving out #books #books & libraries #dark acadamia aesthetic #english literature #literature #romanticism #classic academia #poetry #love poem #romantic literature #goodbye #bye

[americanstarlette]

This town is choking me. I need to getting out. and go to a different place. cut my hair short. change my entire appearance. and my name. i will be someone new by noon. when the sun rises i am her, when the sun sets i am born again.

“you wanna fly, you got to give up the shit that weighs you down.”

—Toni Morrison

#2014 grunge #2014 revival #grey aesthetic #twenty one pilots #electra heart #2014 aesthetic #2014 nostalgia #2014core #2014 tumblr #bring back 2014 #lana is our queen #lanadelrey #tumblr blog #i miss 2014 #2014 girl #2014 soft grunge #2014 vibes #2014 style #2014 #moving away #coming of age #quotes

[sincerely-angel1]

Monday, January 22, 2024

I never understood what “feeling alone in a crowd” meant until I moved to [SCHOOL]. It doesn’t mean just being surrounded by strangers, no, it’s a peculiar kind of isolation that goes beyond that.

It means more than navigating the sea of unfamiliar faces. It’s the realization that you’re a puzzle piece that doesn’t quite fit into the bigger picture.

In a town where everyone seems to know everyone else, I’m the odd one out, just a newcomer grappling with the unspoken rules of “belonging”.

The bustling hallways became a backdrop to my own solitude.

In this town, feeling alone in a crowd, means standing at the epicenter of social whirlwind, and feeling like a mere spectator. It’s a nuanced emotion, one that goes beyond the absence of familiar faces, highlighting the struggle to find your place in a community that already has its dynamics well established.

You know?

#im tired #i need a friend #diary entry #journal #dear diary #i need to write #my diary #relatable #vent #digital diary #new school #new town #moving away #all of us strangers #i’m so confused #alone in a crowd #alone with my thoughts #solitude #this sucks #lmao #just thinkin #journal excerpt #i want to put my thoughts out into the world #my journal #send help #lol

[sorryiapologized]

If I could leave, I would have already left.

I was gonna leave as soon as I could. When I turned eighteen I watched my friends one by one drive out of our town for new adventures. Their rearview lights disappeared over the mountains as they set off to start their own lives. I couldn't leave.

I often felt like Rapunzel, trapped in her tower. Something kept me locked away from the rest of the world. I'd meet people who had traveled to my small town for their first taste of adulthood and I'd avoid the conversation as long as possible, embarrassed to let them in on the secret that I was just some loser townie who couldn't get out.

I blamed my family for my inability to leave. Their dysfunction was the main reason I wanted to leave, and yet it was the tether keeping me there. I had to stay, to give my younger sister some kind of stability. I had to stay for my aging childhood dog, who my drunk father had no ability to care for. I resented the other kids with stable home lives, the ones who knew they could go away and have something to come back to.

The truth is, I was keeping myself there.

When I turned 21 my dog died. My sister graduated high school. I met someone who was willing to skip town with me. There was nothing else keeping me in that town, and still I hesitated. I lamented my decision to leave.

Now, it's been three years since my rearview lights disappeared over the mountain range. It's been three years since my dad cried and begged me not to leave. He's called me about four times since that day.

I've become a distant memory in the lives of those I left behind. Aside from my mom, who calls me often, nobody else thinks of me much now that I'm gone. In a way, it's like I disappeared, but in another way, it's like I never existed to begin with. Their lives have all moved on without me. They don't need me anymore, and so they don't think of me. I think that's why I stayed as long as I did. I wanted to belong, and leaving was a concession that I never really did.

I used to resent my friends who had stable homes, who knew they'd be able to leave and still have someplace to come back to. I used to think if I left their lives would burn down. Now that I'm gone, what hurts is seeing how well they're doing without me. That I actually could have left all along.

#coming of age #noah kahan #growing up #nostalgia #i'm sorry #20 something #paul revere #family #dysfunctional family #moving away

[livingthedragonlife]

hey people who have used PODS and/or U-Haul to move a 2-bedroom apartment's worth of stuff approximately 1200 miles, please tell me your experiences i am trying to decide which to use for my upcoming move (approx. 1 month)

#how the fuck do i tag this #moving advice #moving away #moving tips #she speaks

[beemintty]

My heart is split in two.

I want to be in the past with the old but they don't know me anymore.

But I'm here now with people who still don't know me.

Let go.

Be here.

#moving away #leaving home #on loneliness #on life #my thoughts #thoughts #quotes #poetry #my writing #im feeling out of place in a place i called home l.

[celestesinsight]

The hardest part of moving away is to choose what to take along with you and what to left behind.

#especially if your prized possession are your books #it is so hard to choose #if only i can carry them all #packing #moving away #odiablr #desiblr #desi tumblr

[lovealwayssay]

Life is just loving people as much as you can until someone has to leave and you have to say goodbye and then just missing them forever over and over again.

#I hate the end and I think that missing people is the worst pain imaginable. #i just moved out of my college dorm and I’m SAD #i miss you #missing #graduation #moving away #changes #leaving #lifelessons #life #sad

[emmasued]

i wish i was five again, so i can fall asleep in the car and my parents will carry me to bed. i wish i was eight again, so i can eat mint chocolate chip ice cream in my dad’s truck after having my hand smashed in a car door. i wish i was twelve again, so i can climb up the side of the barn and into the hayloft one more time. i wish i was fifteen again, so i can always look to the stands and see my mother cheering me on. i wish i was seventeen again, so the longest i go without seeing my best friend is just two days. i wish it were two summers ago, so i can spend months on the beach with my mother. i wish i was nine again, so i can learn how to throw football with my dad and brother in the front yard. i wish i was eighteen again, so i can walk across the hall to see my sister. most of all, i wish i was whole again, so i don’t cry at every “goodbye” i say.

#moving away from my family sliced my heart in half #i do not know how to make it whole again #nostalgia #childhood #i wish #missing youth #lows of college #shitpost #college #moving away

[whoreanghae]

promise ; kwon soonyoung

genre - childhood friends to lovers, fluff, slight angst, non idol au, high school / college au

wordcount - 2.3k

disclaimers - lowercase on purpose, no proofreading, gender not specified, fic under the cut

a/n - a lil hoshi one, the angst isnt like Crazy imo its just yn and hoshi being sad for a little bit its more bittersweet than anything (no pun intended)

“i got in!”

you burst into your best friends bedroom holding the acceptance letter you had just opened. soonyoung knew you were stressed about being accepted to your dream university, so this sudden appearance put him at ease on your behalf. he jumped up and gave you a tight hug, both of you with wide smiles plastered across your face. “i told you! you just had to be patient.” you did a little happy dance and soonyoung chuckled as he picked up his jacket. you tilted your head confused. “where are you going?” he shuffled you out of his bedroom as he shut the door. “what do you think? we’re going out to celebrate obviously, this is a big deal!” you laughed as you followed him down the stairs and out the front door of his house.

you and soonyoung had been friends since you first met in daycare when you were both 3. the two of you instantly clicked, so since that day you had been attached at the hip. in the years, your families had gotten close as well, so it was normal for you both to just show up at the other’s home unannounced. whenever you both had free time you were together. you both experienced everything together. first kisses, first relationships, first heartbreaks, the other was always there. you were each others lifelines. 

as soonyoung pulled into your favourite restaurant in your small town, you dug through your bag to find your wallet and pull out the cash within. he shot you an accusatory look. “what?” he took the cash and put it back in your wallet, making you gasp. “you just got into your dream school, lunch is on me today.” you rolled your eyes but couldnt hold back your smile as you climbed out of soonyoungs car. he held his arm out theatrically so you could link yours in his. he always had a flair for the dramatics, you always told him he wouldve been a great actor. you follow along and link your arm in his to make him happy. 

making your way to your usual table, you both say hello to the waitress standing at the counter. you both became regulars over the years, since you both lived within walking distance. the waitress came over and gave you both bright smiles as she pulled out a notepad, awaiting your orders. you ordered first, then she turned towards soonyoung. he gave her his order, but then made a point to include one extra. “and a large chocolate milkshake.” the waitress raised her eyebrows and looked between the two of you. “you two only order milkshakes on special occasions, whats todays?” before you got a chance to speak, soonyoung was already bragging about you. “y/n just got into her dream university, their acceptance rate is really low so today is a huge deal.�� he smiled proudly as you turned a shade of pink. the waitress said her congratulations, and then hurried off to another table. soonyoung sat across the table, looking satisfied with himself. you tried to give him a stern look but couldnt quite keep the smile down.

after eating, you both just decided to go back to his house and watch some movies. the best thing about spending all of your time together was the fact that the two of you had similar tastes in just about everything. between movies, music, and tv shows, it was rare to find something that one of you liked and the other didnt. you were basically the same person just in slightly different forms. when you got to soonyoung’s home, you both changed into comfortable clothes and settled in for the night. youd spent many late nights together, and basically knew each others routines like your own.

throughout the years, everyone around you was shocked that the two of you had never caught feelings for each other. being friends with someone for that long, everyone thought it was bound to happen. while the two of you profusely denied it every time it was brought up, you would be lying if you said that soonyoung hadnt given you butterflies from time to time. there were periods of time where you thought that maybe your love for soonyoung had escalated to something a little bit more than friends. you tried your best to ignore the flips your stomach would do when you would see him making out with a girl at a party, or talking to someone just a bit too close. not wanting to do anything to jeopardize your closeness, you always just pushed the thought out of your head before you thought on it for too long. never did you want to seem possessive or jealous of him having other friends, youd look crazy. you knew soonyoung saw you as a best friend and that would never change for better or for worse, so you tried to see him as nothing more than that. 

some months had passed since your acceptance, and summer was just beginning. you were about to get in your car when soonyoung unexpectedly pulled into your driveway. lightly leaning against your car, you gave him a confused look as he got out of the car holding a letter. “i just got accepted to music school!” your expression changed immediately into pure joy. “oh my god soonyoung thats awesome!” you gave him a big hug, the same as he did when you got accepted. you asked him questions about the university, and then he broke the news. “its.. across the country from my school? does this mean we wont see each other?” you tried to hide the disappointed tone in your voice. this was his big day, you should be happy and excited for him, as he was for you. but the thought of being separated from soonyoung broke your heart.

after finding out you wouldnt see each other for months at a time, you both vowed to make as many memories as you could before you both moved away. over time, it was like you had become a part of each other. leaving felt like losing a limb. but you both tried to stay happy all summer and not even think about what would happen at the end. in between all of the big activities you planned, you both still made sure to have your laidback movie nights at least once a week, like a tradition. while spending all this time together all summer, you found those feelings you had buried so far down had started to resurface. soonyoung truly was perfect in every way. he was funny, and creative, and the sweetest person youd ever met. and he admired you just as much as you admired him. he always made sure you were comfortable no matter what. his main goal was making you happy, little did he know that just being in his presence did the trick pretty well. the pair of you were the textbook definition of twin flames.

it felt like summer slipped away in seconds, and before you knew it, you were helping each other pack your lives into boxes. with every item put into a box, you were just one step closer to the inevitable. although you both tried to ignore the elephant in the room, it was difficult to pretend like you were both ready. you had never been apart from each other for more than a few weeks, so this would be a big step. every now and then you would have to slip out of the room to dry your eyes. you tried to stay strong but obviously it was difficult. in the last week before moving, you debated back and forth with yourself about whether or not you should confess how you feel. you know that this would be the best and last time to do it in person for a while, but you’re hesitant. you beat yourself up for hours and hours trying to make a decision, but ultimately you just decide to judge it in the moment. if you feel the time is right, then youll take the plunge.

the day before you leave, soonyoung randomly calls you and says hes on his way. you were used to his random plans, but this felt different. you assumed he was just trying to get his proper goodbyes out of the way now, since tomorrow would probably be a mess of emotions. you shove on some sneakers as you hear the horn from soonyoungs car sound outside. as you walk out the front door, you make eye contact with him through the window and give a weak smile. the air is quiet when you get into his car. the music volume is almost silent, just enough to hear sound but not make out words. youre both quiet as soonyoung drives, coming to a stop on a hill overlooking the entirety of your small town. its as if youre both waiting for the other to say something. youre afraid if you try to say something the tears will begin to flow. after some time, soonyoung speaks up just loud enough to hear him. “i dont know what im gonna do without you.” you feel your eyes welling up as you nod to yourself, quietly muttering a “me either.”

you both sit in a comfortable, melancholy silence until soonyoung clears his throat. “theres um.. something i need to tell you. and i have been thinking this over again and again and i just.. i cant keep it in any longer.” you furrow your eyebrows as you look over at him for the first time since he parked the car. he takes a deep breath as he looks down at his lap and continues. “ive had.. feelings.. for you for years. ive never known how to bring it up and i didnt want to weird you out and im sorry if this-” “soonyoung.” you interlace your fingers with his as he finally makes eye contact with you, his eyes glossy. “ive been in love with you since the eighth grade. i was always too scared to ruin your friendship.” he smiles, both with relief and shock. “are you serious? youre not fucking with me?” you laugh quietly as you shake your head. “im dead serious, ive been so stressed over the last week trying to figure out if i tell you, or how to tell you.” his smile gets wider as he squeezes your hand. he looks into your eyes again, this time his eyes travel down to your lips. he looks back up, as if asking for permission. you nod, and he leans in. he keeps one hand connected with yours, but the other comes to rest on your jaw as he kisses you softly. when you lean away, you both look at each other in amazement. you rest your head on his shoulder, and he lays his head atop of yours. your hands remain intertwined until you go home. when he pulls into your driveway, he leans across the car and gives you a kiss on the cheek. youre both bright red as you part your ways.

when you get to your bedroom, you secretly have a little celebration dance, which gets cut short by the trill of your phone ringing. you pick it up off your bed. its soonyoung? “hey soon-” “i completely forgot to ask you the most important question ever and i couldnt ask you over text!” you laugh at the urgency in his voice. “and what would that question be?” he takes a few deep breaths in preparation before he asks. “y/n, will you be my partner?” you feel electricity course through your body as you smile the biggest smile you can. “of course i will soonyoung. how could i say no?” you cant believe it. after being friends for 15 years, you fall in love the day before you both move to opposite sides of the country. its unapologetically you. 

the next day stings a lot more than you expected it to. soonyoungs car pulls up in front of your house, but it doesnt make you happy like it usually does. seeing the boxes piled up fills you with sadness. his mother gets out of the passenger side and says hello to you, and stands with your mother talking about the two of you. as soonyoung gets out of the car, you try to not fall apart. you both say nothing as he pulls you into a hug. he kisses your forehead and you hear confused noises from from both of your mothers. one of them says something about you two ‘finally getting the hint’ and you both laugh as soonyoung wipes your tears. you stand with your arms around each other for a while, before soonyoungs mother breaks the news that its time to go. soonyoung puts his hand on your chin and tilts your head up to look at him. “we’ll call everynight, and text whenever possible.” you nod and he leans down and gives you one last kiss. as he pulls away, you reach up and wipe away some of his tears as well. you both giggle at the emotions of it all as you both have tears streaming down your face. he walks towards his car, but you call out to him one last time. 

“soonyoung, promise we’ll be together forever?”

“promise.”

#seventeen fluff #seventeen imagines #seventeen #kpop fluff #kpop x reader #friends to lovers #svt #childhood friends to lovers #hoshi #hoshi x reader #kwon soonyoung #high school au #university au #seventeen angst #kpop angst #moving away #y/n and hoshi go to different universities #idiots in love #whoreanghae

[strrywitxofthewest]

I keep trying to have a better goodbye with you in my dreams.

#web weave #yearning #moving away #leaving #miss you

[scumnoise]

gleemer | gauze

Do you remember how we used to be?

#gleemer #moving away #indie #rock #shoegaze #downer