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warmau · 5 years

Text

Professor!AU Johnny

shout out to the person who asked me to continue this on kofi! tw: mentions of heartbreak, general angst but it’s still a warmau au so you know it’ll end up ok

“just forget me like im trying to forget you!”

the first thing people realize about their new professor is that he’s tall

and that for such a handsome, young looking guy

he dresses like a grandpa

we’re talking knitted sweater vests and corduroy pants

wood brimmed glasses and shiny oxfords

but none of that matters, because by the end of the first class most people know that it’s going to be a fun semester

because professor suh ,,,,,,,,,,,, is a goofball

prof. suh teaches introduction to film studies, it’s a core class that all film majors have to take

and if anyone is passionate about films ,,,, well you haven’t met johnny

he especially likes to rave about likes of brian de palma, john carpenter and william friedkin

the 70s horror wave is kinda his jam,,,,,,

also love documentaries and if you were to pluck his headphones (never in his life will he spend money on airpods) off his head you’d probably hear a fleetwood mac album resounding through them

even though,,,,,,this guy is barely even thirty,,,,,,

but anyway back to the fact:

johnny is the funniest and cornball-est professor there is

in the sweetest kind of way

he’ll go out of his way to organize movie viewings on the quad

ask students to come up to the front of the class and act out a favorite scene of their’s

even bring in his black lab puppy to class and be like

“if you handed in your essay on time - you can give jordan a pet”

totally got called in with the dean to discuss smuggling animals onto campus and johnny was just like hey,,,,,it worked. no one submitted their essay in late

you can tell he really loves teaching and he really loves film, he just gets so animated when he talks

pointing at his slideshows, rocking excitedly back and forth on his heels when a student gives a deep and insightful comment on a directors work

the absolute look of pride on his face when students present their final projects

and he can tell they enjoyed their time working on it

got featured in the university newspaper because he wore one of those newsboy caps

and the caption was: film department fashionista professor ~

johnny got a good laugh out of it

but drama professor ten INSISTED the newspaper do a cover on him too

because johnny? fashion? no,,,,,,,if you wanted fashion, looks, serves then you had to come to him

ten’s assistant professor hendery: all you do is wear black

ten: shuttup i have a masters degree

johnny is friends with all the other professors, no matter the department or the area of interest

he’s on great terms with the engineering departments heartthrob taeyong, the studious physics department head kun, and even the coach for the uni football team jaehyun

he’s basically irresistible - he’s a positivity magnet

and everyone wants to befriend him

or date him

(several times he’s had to politely refuse advances from students and faculty alike - though the one time a love letter found its way onto his desk he really just,,,,couldn’t find it in his heart to throw it out)

basically the entire campus has a crush, platonic or not

and everyone just cannot fathom how professor suh is single

“he is suuuuuuch a catch”

you overhear, while pouring yourself some coffee and trying to remember if you sent out the right links for the homework yesterday

“i know, i heard he’s finally interested in dating again.”

“he wasn’t before?”

one of the teachers shrugs

“he just keep rejecting everyone - but there was a rumor of him going around with someone last week-”

you don’t really care for the rest of the conversation

because you know it’s blatantly untrue

you were the person who had been with johnny last week

all you’d done is meet up to discuss a possible group project between your students

nothing more, nothing less

you’d only recently gotten a job at the university teaching in the history department

and johnny had been kind to you since day one

talking to you on campus when you’d bumped into each other, giving you a little rundown of where to find what and who professors could go to in case of emergencies

he’d been bright and welcoming and just like anyone else

you liked him, not in a romantic way or anything - you just could tell he was a good person right off the bat

after a couple of days you’d run into him after a mandatory meeting for professors

and you had brought up the fact that you were going to be doing a class on the 70s and johnny had excitedly offered that your class join his for a viewing of the ‘79 film version of ‘mad max’

you’d talked about it over coffee at the campus cafeteria, and to your surprise it had gotten blown out of the water

several people, including students, had asked you about it

‘are you into him?’

‘you know faculty aren’t allowed to date right?’

‘didn’t you just get here - you should probably slow down...’

more than anything, you were surprised at how everyone thought they had the right to pry into his business

and it had made you wonder

maybe johnny is too nice for his own good

but either way - you didn’t want to get stuck in any of this drama

keeping this job was your priority, falling in love? you hadn’t thought about it since college

the work day dwindles down, you teach your last class and barely have a chance to let them know about their projects as they all rush out of the door when the period ends

you take a little time putting your things together when you hear the door open

thinking it’s a student, you get ready to see if they have any questions

but instead you see johnny in the doorway

a beige cardigan thrown over his button up shirt and dad fitting jeans

“ah! looks like my students were right - this is your classroom.”

you give a little smile, but ask why he’s ultimately here

johnny doesn’t answer for a second, he looks like he’s collecting himself

“i just wanted to make sure you’re ok, there have been some rumors floating around and -”

you’re reminded of the dozen or so comments you’ve gotten and the whispering of the other professors and ta’s in the lounge this morning

“oh, i’m ok. i keep telling everyone they’ve taken it the wrong way.”

johnny’s smile softens

“im sorry to cause you so much trouble when this is your first semester teaching here.”

you put a hand up and shake your head, not noticing the way johnny ‘s eyes dull just a bit

“don’t worry. everyone will know it was simply school stuff when we have the shared class.”

he agrees with a small nod and you think that’s the end of it

when suddenly he walks over and helps collect some of the heavy books on your desk

“let me carry these.”

“oh you don-”

“please?”

his smile curls up at the corners, the gentle plead leaves you incapable of saying no

and so you watch him gather up the books in his arms and you walk out behind him

yeah, i think he is too kind for his own good.

you and johnny plan to merge your classes on thursday

instead of meeting up, you simply email each other about the arrangements

and everyone seems to forget about the momentary rumor that you and him are anything more than co-workers

but still, even through emails, johnny is charming and sweet

you start to question it too

hovering over his profile picture on the email, the empty ring finger and the way you hear stories everyday about confessions turned down by the film professor

thursday finally rolls around and all the students are beyond happy to be watching a movie rather than doing classwork

johnny cracks jokes about the film while you set up the projector, you get a little jealous seeing how engaging your students are with him

when sometimes you can’t even get them to say a word

he’s a great person and a great teacher, it’s like he was made for this profession

you muse, before catching yourself mid thought, embarrassed to be thinking about johnny when you’re in the middle of a class

when everything is good to go, johnny gives you a thumbs up and all the student inch forward in their seats as the opening scene plays

you and johnny move toward the back of the room

where he leans up against the wall and you switch the lights off before catching his side profile in the corner of your eye

he’s handsome, it’s undeniable

but looks are only surface deep, so you wonder if someone so beautiful could also be so kind and caring

johnny turns and you want to pretend you weren’t looking, but it’s too late

the sides of his lips curl up into a smile and he tilts his head, black hair parted perfectly around the frame of his handsome face

“have you seen this movie before?”

he asks in a low voice

“n-no”

“ah, well if you look at the setting the director makes sure to-”

the buzzing of his phone stops him and he excuses him from the room

you think it must be a call from a friend, maybe an appointment reminder

but when johnny doesn’t come back for almost an hour - you start to worry

half of the class is trying to pretend they’re not on their phones while the other half is engrossed in the film

so you make a quick decision to leave the room for a second and find where he’s gone off too

“no, i don’t want to see you again.”

the voice makes you stop in your tracks

that,,,,,,,,sounds like johnny,,,,,,but,,,,,,,harsher?

“i don’t think you understand what you did to me. do you think i can forgive you? do you really think -”

he’s talking faster, but the pitch is higher

“stop, i don’t want to hear it. you chose him, you chose him when you slept with him in our bed!”

you freeze, feeling your blood go cold

this isn’t a conversation i should be hearing ,,,,,

you swallow and want to start backing away, but for some reason your feet are planted

refusing to let you leave

“no, no - just forget me like im trying to forget you!”

at just the right moment, your senses kick in and you manage to turn yourself around and back toward the classroom door

when you step inside, you get spared some glances but the action scene on the screen awards you a clean entrance

you go back to your spot, arms crossed over your chest

was he talking to his ex? it sounded like it,,,,,,but his voice,,,,,

he sounded so broken

johnny doesn’t come back for another couple of minutes

when he does, he enters the room and gives a little smile to students who giggle his way

he sees you and the smile widens

but you can’t smile back

his voice, the pain you felt in every syllable - they make this happy johnny in front of you feel fake

thankfully the ending credits save you from having to make awkward conversation

you and johnny move toward the front of the room and as you shut down the projector you hear him talking with the students

the same pep, cheer, and happiness that’s always there

seems duller

or maybe it’s only you who hears the small change

the rest of the students are reacting and chatting with him as they normally would

and when johnny turns and asks if you want to say anything

you let your students know about their projects, a wave of groans passing through the sea of bodies

you and johnny let the class out a little early, you sort of panic because you think being alone with him will somehow be weird

so you make up an excuse about having coffee with professor ten

you dash through the door, leaving a confused johnny behind and make way for cover in your office

im an adult, why am i acting like some kid who just almost got caught with a secret?!

you reprimand yourself, but still you don’t feel like it would have been a great idea to stay around and chat

like what would you say to him? especially after hearing him ,,,,,, like that

you take cover in your office, closing the door and setting yourself behind your desk

you distract yourself grading some in-class work when your phone lights up with a notification

you think it’s a faculty email so you open it up without another thought

when you see johnny’s names

‘thanks for letting me show the movie to your class! i hope everything is ok, you seemed a little distressed. did professor ten do something to you - let me know~’

the signature on the email is the same one all teachers use in their school emails

you want to answer because you feel bad knowing he’s worried

but at the same time you feel awkward now

am i the only one who knows about his ex? no one has ever brought it up before.......

you pick up your phone and hit reply, but instead of typing anything you just stare at it

whatever, it’s not my business. let’s just forget what i heard and move on.

you lock the screen and go back to grading

the time passes and a couple of days later you find yourself so busy with your classes projects that nothing else manages to cross your mind

you’re rushing down campus with a couple of large display boards when you almost crash head first into someone

“oh sorry - i can’t see over these-”

“here, let me help.”

johnny’s voice reaches you first and then you feel the boards being lifted from your hands

with his tall stature, they look smaller than before

he pouts when you make eye contact and goes

“you never answered my email! are you ok?”

it takes you a second to remember what he’s talking about, but when you do you just make up another excuse

“oh i sent it, maybe it didn’t go through?”

“maybe, you know all the students use up the school wifi.”

you laugh with him and for that split moment it feels like everything is normal

you’re just two coworkers, two friends

but then

“no, no - just forget me like im trying to forget you!”

the words close in on and you abruptly feel the calmness of your situation turn into dread

“i can carry those-”

you start, trying to get away from johnny again, but he simply refuses to let them go

“what room are you in, let me help you.”

you want to insist that you can do it yourself, but panicking you just blurt the number out

you both start your way toward the building and johnny makes casual conversation

but the words you’d overheard nearly overshadow everything he says

why do i care so much? why is it bothering me?

you groan and johnny suddenly asks what’s wrong

you can’t take the feeling and you grab the board back

“sorry - just forgot i need um markers, i have to go!”

your excuse is utter bullshit, you’re sure johnny doesn’t believe you

but you don’t like the sinking feeling you get around him and so you disappear again and johnny almost calls out

but even if he did, you wouldn’t hear him over the pained memory of that phone call

at some point you start avoiding him

or at least avoid any contact with him

you don’t want to seem rude, so you just go out of your way to be in any place that he’s not

so he can’t ask you about it and so you don’t have to be faced with knowing that the happy character he plays

isn’t all that happy

you think that’s what bothers you most - the fact that everyone else sees him as this

positive light, cutely dressed in sweaters over button downs and oxfords

adjusting the glasses on his nose as he flips through a script submitted in one of his classes

but now you just see the pain - the cracking voice - just the visualization of johnny walking into a room

and being faced with something so heartbreakingly cruel that to this day he’s shunned away affection

no wonder he rejects just about anyone - maybe he just can’t trust someone like that again?

“excuse me, can you tell me where the film department is?”

you startle, looking up to see an unfamiliar face

the individual smiles, apologizing politely for scaring you before explaining that they need to see one of the film professors

you have a couple of minutes to spare and even though you don’t want to go to that building

because of the off chance of bumping into professor suh

you still feel like you can’t just give this person vague directions

so you take the chance and tell them you’ll walk them over

they don’t say much, so you assume they’re either a transfer student or maybe a visiting professor

you swipe your id card to get through the entrance of the building and hold the door open for them to step through behind you

they’re rather plain, you’re not struck by anything about them - just that they’re neat and very mannered

so you don’t expect that once you get off the elevator and lead them into the professor’s lounge

that their demeanor to change as drastically as it does

because the moment they set eyes on johnny

who you didn’t even notice in the corner

they lose their posed attitude and run at him with open arms

your confusion is apparent, is this his relative? they don’t look at all like him-

but then it dawns on you

because johnny’s eyes turn cold and his lips thin out into a straight line

“what are you doing here?”

he asks and the tone of voice sets a tension in the room that’s nearly suffocating

“john - don’t be like this! you were so mean on the phone and i thought in person you’d be -”

“you need to leave.”

he’s merciless, motioning to the door with his head

and catching a glimpse of you, frozen in the corner with shock

the pit of your stomach churns

is that,,,,,,,,,,are they,,,,,,,,,,,,,,his ex?

“oh c’mon, you won’t even talk to me now? after everything we’ve been through? johnny love you know-”

even though his anger is nearly blazing off of him like an open flame

johnny touches them gently - his hands barely grazing their upper-arm as he starts to walk them over to the door

you want to escape, that or just plain disappear

but you can’t move a muscle

johnny is nearly two feet away when his ex jerks themselves away

“john - listen to me! you can’t just leave me like this! look - look at this - it’s the ring you got me, we’re still engaged! you can’t just -”

johnny seems to snap, the kindness and the happiness he exudes almost daily is no where to be found

he turns, broad shouldered and standing tall

if you had never known any other side of him you would have found yourself frightened

“that ring means one thing, it means you’re a cheater. im sick and fucking tired of you thinking i will ever take you back - get out of my life for good.”

the cursing sounds unnatural in your ears, everything about this johnny is off

he’s harsh and sharp and his energy is just pitch black

but at the same time you can’t blame him

this person has some kind of chip on their shoulder about hurting him and thinking they’ll get off scottfree

it even stirs up an anger in you as well

johnny turns and with one glance you can tell that the rough, pissed off expression on his face is going to turn into devastation

you don’t want him to breakdown in front of this person so you decide to do something you know you’ll probably come to regret

you intervene, stepping in front of johnny and giving him the fakest smile you can

“oh professor suh did you remember we have papers to grade together, come with me!”

you reach out and touch his wrist, his skin is hot and you tug him out of the room

his ex makes a move toward the door, but you nudge johnny forward and then take the chance to slam the door shut in their face

the sound echoing through the halls and earning you questionable looks on all sides

but you don’t care

you know johnny needs to go somewhere and be alone and you find that place in the fire escape staircase

dingy and old, but free of students and pesky exes

when you find yourself in the small, dark area you realize you should excuse yourself

and let him maul over the many emotions he must be feeling right now

but when you turn to go, you hear his deep voice softly ask you to stay

he sits down on the steps, large hands cradling his head

“why can’t they leave me alone?”

“im sorry, i don’t know why.”

you say the only thing you can say even though it makes you feel terrible

johnny shakes his head, his dark hair falling over his eyes and making it hard to read the expression on his face

although it’s not hard to assume that it’s pained

“you know, i was going to marry that person. i was going to walk down the aisle with someone who - who -”

johnny loses his words

“who would betray you?”

you finish and he looks up, his eyes ringed red and bristling with haziness

“yes.”

he chokes back a sound

“someone who doesn’t really love me.”

he shrinks, large shoulders closing in on themselves

you want to comfort him, but you’re not sure

after all it isn’t as if you and him are particularly close

so you give a small bow as you mutter that you’ll leave him be for now, that he needs his space and you don’t want to invade it

but before you can turn around, johnny rises up off the steps and stops you

for a moment he’s just got a hand on your wrist, holding you in place - maybe he just needs someone to hear him out

maybe he wants to thank you for getting rid of the person who hurt him so bad

but something twists in the pit of your stomach as he tugs you toward him

and you feel weightless, falling into his arms easily and fitting into the plane of his chest perfectly

“im sorry”

he apologizes, deep voice cracking

“im sorry - i just want to hold -”

you give a weak nod, knowing you should be the bigger person and step away from this

he’s vulnerable, you’re the only one around, there isn’t any other reason for his actions

but a little voice in your head prods it says

maybe johnny actually trusts you! maybe you’ve made him feel like being open with someone is possible again!

but you refuse to fall into that trap

johnny is handsome, kind, and didn’t deserve to be cheated on and scarred

and so it’s impossible that he’d ever find healing in you

“can you close your eyes for a second?”

you freeze at the request - wanting to ask why, but somehow all you end up doing is letting your lashes flutter closed

“im sorry, im so sorr-”

johnny doesn’t even finish his sentence, he presses his lips to yours and you let out a sound of confusion

that he interprets as protest so he pulls away just as fast as he started and tries to stumble over another apology

when you just reach out with your hands and pull him back into you

i don’t care if im just a coping mechanism for him right now, just feeling his lips on mine for that moment - it’s obvious he’s missed affection. he needs this. im just being a good person.

no matter how you reason in your mind, your thoughts melt away when johnny’s hands wrap around your waist and his large body nearly envelops you whole

one hand finds the hem of your shirt - but hesitates and stays on your hip as you tilt your head and johnny groans when your teeth pull at his lip

he’s burning up, his skin gets hotter and hotter as the kiss gets deeper and deeper

and you feel your back against the wall - johnny placing his hands on the surface beside your head as he keeps himself from doing anything you might not want him to

but you’re at a point where you’re willing to take his own hand in yours and move it back onto your body

because johnny suh deserves to be loved and he deserves to have someone that’ll give themselves to him and only him

and in this moment it’s you - and you want him to know that

“did you hear about the physics quiz for professor qian?”

two voices from below shatter the bubble around you and johnny

disconnecting from each other - you take in a breath and react faster than he can

you open the door to the stairs, scurrying out

just in time for it to shut behind you as two students round the top stair and find professor suh alone

staring at the door

they giggle, greeting him and he just nods, speechless and touching the curve of his lips

“what the hell did i just do?”

you say to yourself, trying to fix your hair as you pass through the campus and back to the parking lot

you thankfully don’t have any classes to teach today so you just book it home and ignore the notifications that litter the screen of your phone

you feel like you’re in high school again - being a giant child about this sticky situation

but you just don’t know what to do now

why did you let yourselves get carried away like that? you work together for gods sake you’re going to have to see each other TOMORROW

you groan into your pillow

you try to carefully deleting notifications from your work email that have johnny’s name in them

and only feeling worse when they pop up again

you accidentally press on one and it opens

it’s the same profile photo on the email icon, smiling, happy johnny

the same .edu email

everything is the same but the message

‘please don’t hate me’

you take in a breath, tap reply

‘i don’t, but - what did that all mean?’

‘this isn’t something we should talk about over......’

‘yeah, let’s do it in person.’

you gather up a bit of your courage and tell yourself it’s ok. mistakes happen, the air will clear up when you face each other

your students don’t notice that you’re jittery

when you drop the pen you’re holding, they just keep typing away on their laptops

and for the first time as a professor, you’re happy to have no one paying attention to you

when the bell rings and you start walking toward the campus cafe where you’ll be meeting johnny

you feel a mixture of butterflies and sickening poison invade the inside of your stomach

he’s already there, sipping a coffee, wearing a ridiculously long sleeved cardigan and rounded glasses

a student greets him and he gives her the smile you’re so used to seeing

that the image of him curled up with tears on the brink of his eyes just doesn’t seem real anymore

but you saw it. you know you did.

you approach slowly and johnny seems to hesitate between getting up and staying in his seat

“do you want me to get you a coffee?”

he propositions, but you shake your head

“johnny - i mean, professor suh - i hope you know you don’t owe me anything.”

he had been drumming his fingers on his thigh, but he stops

“you don’t owe me any explanations about ,,,,,,,,,,,, that person or about the situation or about,,,,,,,,,,,, why what happened - happened. i just want us to be good colleagues,,,”

your voice trails off when the smile on his face isn’t showing up

it’s just a blank - long stare

“professor suh,,,,,,?”

“did you think i did what i did just because i feel lonely?”

you sit back and look around

“i-”

“you’ve got it wrong.”

he slips out of the chair and you think he’s about to just leave - but he’s thinking what you’re thinking

which is that you can’t talk about making out with each other when there are about one hundred students within earshot range

so you end up again in the stairwell, not the same one - but it’s the only private place on campus

and the second you’re alone, johnny chucks the cup over his shoulder and wraps his arms around you

your body is pressed, perfectly again, into the shape of his chest

“you’re not a rebound, or a coping mechanism, or any of those things.”

he mumbles, deep voice against the skin of your ear

“you’re the first person ive had an interest in in a long time - i just chose the wrong time to act on it.”

you think you’re making the words up in your head, but they’re really coming out of johnny’s mouth

“i know you said you want to be good colleagues, and i want that too. but outside of work i want-”

you shift a little, arms coming up to embrace him back

really you’re not even thinking about it - your body just feels safe and comfortable

and it speaks for you as he pulls back

to look at you with those almost amber like eyes

“i want something more - if you’re ok with it?”

you nod, lips parting a little as he leans in to kiss you again

there isn’t the same desperate, driven by pain feeling as there was yesterday

but it’s still loving and passionate

“but prof - johnny,,,”

you start against the skin of his cheek

and he slows down a little to hear you out

“if i see your ex on campus again, i wont be nice about it now.”

he chuckles

“don’t worry, you have my permission to do your worst.”

you both laugh over it - before kissing again and again and again

until his phone goes off and he picks it up and the head of the film department is frantically asking if he meant to be late to his class or if he got into another accident on his bike

“you bike to work?”

“yes - and ill be picking you up on my bike on our first date.”

#nct scenarios #nct imagines #nct au #johnny scenarios #johnny imagines #yungho scenarios #yungho au #member: johnny #nct 127 imagines #nct 127 au #nct 127 scenarios #nct 127 #johnny #uhhhhhhhhh htgrfhdskjl

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lockdownuk · 4 years

Text

Lockdown Diary Part 3

A personal account during the lockdown in the UK due to the Covid-19 outbreak.

23/03/2020 8:30pm Boris Johnson, UK Prime Minister, gives a live address to the nation to, effectively, put the country on lockdown to stem the spread of the deadly coronavirus strain, Covid-19.

Many of us have been self-isolating for days but this latest development within the UK in reaction to the pandemic feels very serious and very scary. I decided to keep a simple diary and where better but online.

Day 61: Writing this in the afternoon on day 62. An exercise driven day. Two walks and stair climb as usual plus I popped round Jeff’s early evening. First time I’ve been to his house, 1 Garden Row, Elmington. It’s further than I thought so, with walking there an back, I managed a daily total of 14km. It was good to see him and have a social (but social-distanced) beer. When I got home, @9:45pm, I made thai green chicken curry, watch The Report (a great, if worrying film) and then TikTok-ed until gone 5am!

Day 62: Typing this on day 64! Beer round Karen’s. Missed Sam’s quiz.

Day 63: Typing this on day 64! Beer round Karen’s. Again! Well, it is bank holiday Monday! Had dirty pizza for tea and watched The Heat. Again! It is the most piss funny film.

Day 64: Well, I have been feeling guilty about treatung the bank holiday w/e l;ike a bank holiday w/e. It’s dawned on me that that guilt is way too self-disiciplned. I got up about midday, usual two walks and stair climb but that’s it. I need to clean the house from top to bottom, get on top of my online courses, get the garden done, get the car fixed, go shopping…fucking hell - if only I had the time…

Day 65: Today I swapped Amazon prime free trial for about the 5th time in my life. Same card and address - will they get wind of my skullduggery. This is all so I can finish watching Hunters and catch Homecoming S2. I went shopping at Asda near Raunds. I wish I hadn’t, it’s no good for a comprehensive shop. Received an email from RCI inviting me to a Zoom meeting with Pal Mulcahy for a business update. I fear the worst. And it’s at 10:00am, FFS!

Day 66: Logged in an attended zoom forum with Paul Mulcahy and over 250 RCI staff this morning. The message was that there is going to be redundancies. I expected this and expected to fall victim. All staff that are going to be put through cionsultation would be contacted today. I however wasn’t! Very, very surpised. meanwhile, Nick Reilly asked to connect via LinkedIn (including become a LinkedIn staff team member - that’s new to me so I’ll see what it is but I accepted the invitation) Later, I WhatsApp-ed him and asked who has been affected from IT. All he could tell me was no one on Jon Rodger’s team is under threat. Also, Mark C emailed - I’ll respond tomorrow. I got up at 09:00ish and had my mornming walk before the 10:00am meeting. I am now, at 09:30pm, fucking knackered. Dinner and then bed, methinks but not before one more episdoe of Hunters!

Day 67: Typing on Day 68. Got pretty drunk last night. I’ve got blisters from walking (new boots) so I don’t think I’ll walk tomorrow (well, today!).

Day 68: I did fuck all today. Got up after 1pm, no walking. I did manage to clean the bathroom (and smash my little mirror) and do my 26 stair climb. I am typing at 9pm and I feel whacked!

Day 69: I have an abscess. It’s not too painful (today) but I am going to call the dentist tomorrow (Monday). I think antibiotics are in order. I watched a film, which I actually started yesterday, called The Voices starring Ryan Reynolds, Gemma Arteton and Anna Kendrick. Fuuuuuuuuuuuucking weird. The closing credits are the most bizarre, in context, I’ve ever seen. But, in general, a very good film. Back to normal exercise regime today plus hovered the hall and stairs. Get me. It’ll be interetingh to see my Google Fit figures for May tomorrow.

Day 70: Contacted the dentist who advised salt water rinsing and ibuprofen. But, tbf, it’s a lot better today and the swelling has gone right down. The dentist I called was the Oundle House (Rodericks) one. I was not hopeful since last time I saw them they referred me to their Northampton clinic for root canal work which was quoted at over £600. However, the dentist was very nice, had my x-ray to hand from that last visit and seemed more interested in making sure I’m OK than gaining a paying customer. He still wants to see me when possible though! I must mention the weather. It has been glorious weather nearly every day throughout May (it’s June 1st today). Seriously sunny and like a holiday every day. The news mentioned it today - the level of sunshine throughout the transition from spring to summer is unprecedented, apparently. My T shirt tan is, quite frankly, ridiculous!

Day 71: Today’s ‘must mention’ is what’s going on in the US and it’s not particularly related to Trump. There was a black man killed while under arrest. George Floyd died Monday 25th May (8 days ago) A policeman, who knelt on his neck for minutes while he complained of not being able to breathe, has been charged with murder. Now there are riots and curfews and military intervention all over the country. It’s similar to the English riots of 2011. It’s worrying, sad, scary and not what the fight against the pandemic needs. Most of all, it’s racism rearing its ugly head yet again. I’ve had a normal-ish day. received an email from Jim checking in, talked to a recruiter about a promising job lead (although the hours are 8-5 which I am not happy about), talked to Barry across the road and sent Barzzy a WhatsApp. And I logged in Shaw Academy and started lesson one of module 2 of web Design. It’s been a while, so long overdue, but I only did about 15 minutes. Must try harder / do better! As I type, late (10:10pm) I have dinner cooking and a strange pain in my left side and am in the middle of No Country for Old Men. Don’t think I’ve seen it since the cinema (13 years!)

Day 72: As soon as (well, within a couple of days) I mention the weather, it turns. It’s rained a little and is a lot cooler (15° rather than mid-20s). Much better for walking, I have to say. I finished Hunters today (Amazon Prime series). While I enjoyed it, it got too surreal at the end. It is loosely based on the real story of Nazi hunters in the US in 1977 but the straying from loosely based to down-right ridiculous fiction annoyed me. If it goes to S2, I will watch it, however. Received some of my rental deposit back today (the law changed so that only 5 weeks rent can be demanded as deposit). Over £600. Nice.

Day 73: I made a short video for Marc and Clare’s 26th wedding anniversary. I ‘dressed up’ for it. I enjoyed doing it and I think it was appreciated.

Day 74: Typing on Day 75 for no other reason than I couldn’t be bothered on day 74! I received a letter either today or the day before (well, yesterday or the previous day!) from Mr Minos at the eye clinic informing me that, while there is some stuff going on in both eyes (garnered from the photo scans done at the last hospital appointment), he wants to see me in three months. Always a refief when that happens. Been getting into two series on Amazon: Alex Rider and Modern Love. One is a male Hanna, the other is soppy affairs of the heart based on real life stories (from essays written in the NY Times). Both enjoyable for totally different reasons.

Day 75: Lazyish day. Well, not really, just that I only went for one walk, alebit 6km andI got pissed on. Wehn the rain hit, it was also fucking freezing! Some of the clouds were stunning today, made for great photos. As I type, it’s 21:12, I’m listening the wonderful Phoebe Bridgiers. Now, I’m gonna make some tea and sup a few ales, I reckon.

Day 76: Done lots of walking today (over 13,000 steps) I made sausage casserole with too much chilli (scotch bonnet and birdeye). I had an online (fb) debate with Sam over whether the George Floyd murder was a racial.

Day 77: Received a new (used) wing mirror for the car. £18 with delivery, I reckon that’s a bargain. I cashed in £20 from Prolific as well, so I’m satisfied at the financial full-circle. Dropped the car off at Barnwell (Nene Valley Body Shop) and walked back - 7km. Just about to dive into tea - finishing the blazing hot sausage casserole from yesterday. Then I’m going to do some more Rubik’s cube practice with my recently acquired GoCube.

Day 78: Lots of daily walking, 26 stair climb, press-up and late nights watching TikTok (gone 3am this morning) are making for a constantly knackered Tim Stubbs. Today I made veg soup and cooked up some meatballs. Both are delish. How did I ever to learn how to conjure up such stuff? The Rubik’s cube learning is coming along except that I need good daylight to distinguish between the yellow and white faces on the flipping thing!

Day 79: Listening to Radio 6 most the day and the news is making for dire listening. Forecast of severe recession, especially if there is a second peak of the virus, which I think there will be. Plus, an offshoot of the George Floyd murder and the #BlackLivesMatter movement, institutions and town councils are being lobbied by campaigners to remove statues of anyone associated with things like slavery (one was toppled in Bristol at the w/e) and rename buildings etc. that were named after historical characters with any links to something that now is deemed wrong or offensive. I agree with it but it’s not pleasant to hear amongst other bleak news. Walked to Barnwell to collect my car - front trim reseated and new wing mirror fitted, £20 - bargain (I source the replacement wing mirror). But, also, forked out £165 on car tax! Cleaned the lounge from top to bottom. Knackering!

Day 80: Chatted with Dad and Rita - he’s pissed off with the slavery backlash but otherwise they are both OK. I saw Baz in the Tesco queue where I mentioned my disgust at the Thursday market being allowed (I found I could not maintain 2m at all times just walking to Tesco’s!) and that I really don’t want to catch Covid19 as I will probably die. Maybe a bit dramatic but he messaged me later today to say he’d been thinking on what I said and offered to shop for me. I replied that I am OK to shop but am scared at how people are taking things so much less seriously than when lockdown started yet the virus is still out there just as it was then! I am very touched at his massage. I thoroughly cleaned the bedroom and changed the bedclothes today. House work really knackers me out!

Day 81: Spare room cleaned today. Not much else to type about. It’s Friday, I making curried mince and I don’t feel like a beer. How I’ve changed!

Day 82: I did have beers last night. Ended up going to bed with daylight and dawn chorus for company. Today, when I woke, gone 1pm, I have been greeted by what can only be described as thoroughly depressing news from every quarter. This includes violence in the capital, further virus outbreak in Beijing. Fog’s political posts on FB make for depressing (but vaild) reading. I’m feeling thoroughly fed up today. Not even music can lift my mood…

…but, I am currently listening to Craig Charles on BBCR6 and, I have to say, he’s putting in quite an exceptional effort - there may be hope that my mood might lift, even at gone 8pm! I might have a beer or two and grab something postivity and enjoyment from the day after all.

Day 83: Another late one last night but up before noon today. Started watching something called Condor on Sky One. It’s OK - there’s stuff I wanna waytch on Amazon Prime but, more often than not, it keeps telling me there’s ‘a problem’ when I try to play anything. Pissing me off. I just checked and I have two weeks of the initial 12 of furlough to go. I shall started asking the questions about what might happen on the Connections website.

Day 84: Typing this on Day 85. On the way back from dropping off some shoes for Sean Davies at his brother’s (martin) I met Karen and she said why not pop round for a beer so I did. Certainly not used to a drink on a Monday so that, and the genral upheaval to my evening, while good fun and a nice change, put pay to my usual diary entry! I sorted Amazon Prime out by leaving the TV turned off for over an hour. Day 85: Tim did the garden today and it looks great. The pipes in the bathroom have been knocking loudly, on and off, for a couple of weeks now. Last night, they were so loud that today I took it upon myself to resolve it or ring Woodfords. So, having turned off the water, run the taps dry to get rid of any trapped air and then turned the water back on slowly, I discoved it’s the cistern and its pipes. Woodfords are arranging Corvee to visit. Meanwhile, leaving the water turned off at least stops the noise which is, otherwise, costant and unbearable! I emailed HR a couple of days ago about what’s happening in a couple of weeks time in terms of furlough when the 12 weeks will be up. Sue Cockimngs got back to me attaching an email Deryn sent on 15th May which I never received. Basically, they’ll extend furlough if need be and an update should be forthcoming late May/early June. Well, that time has passed, so who knows what is going to happen. The furlough scheme (CJRS) has been changed by the govenment, I’ve read, and it looks like any new people would have to have been furloughed by June 10th (it’s the 16th today) so no furlough rotation, which is annoying. The CJRS ends 1st October with employer contributions required from 1st August - that’s D-Day as far as I am concerned….so job hunting will have to step up a notch! Day 86: Pete’s birthday and he bought himself the same speaker as me. When I asked if it lived up to his expectations he mentioned it’s better through WiFi than Bluetooth. That confused me as I haven’t got WiFi available on mine…..long story short, I bought the wrong fucking speaker. I got a AudioPro AddOn T10 instead of C10. To say I am fucked off is an understatement. To think I was so pleased at the cheap price I paid. Now I feel like I have wasted €200. Bollocks.

Day 87: Finished Alex Rider last night. Another series that started off so well and ended a litte weak but, overall, not bad. I’ve started keeping strange meal times…lunch very late (4pm) and dinner really late (11pm). I need to sort it ‘cos it’s playing havoc with my sugar levels. I had a huge hypo while having my second walk today, second day on the trot that’s happened. My late dinner was Chinese chicked curry with a quarter of a scotch bonnet and two birdeye chillies. Delish.

Day 88: I have managed to be bitten yesterday or the day before on one of my walks. There are strange, itchy lumps on my right inner forearm. And I do mean itchy. I trimmed my sideburns today, I was very pissed off with them. My hair looks just a little less shit. I did a shop at Tesco in Corby today. Mainly booze as follows: 20 cans Sam Miguel £18 18 cans Stella £15 20 bottles Bud £10 8 cans Tyskie £9 3 lrg bottles Warsteiner £5 £57 Bargain.

Day 89: Lazy day. One short walk and usual stair climb. Howard and Sue popped round to give me a pressie - bottle of Monkey Shoulder. I’m building up quite a collection of whisky!

Day 90: Dad called and we chatted for an hour or so. I had to apologise for not sending a father’s day card! Dan messaged me and offered to pay for a pizza delivery which I declined.

Football has started again this past week…Prem and Championship only. L1 and L2 season was cut short and Posh missed out on the play-offs by one place. As I type, Everton v Liverpool is on Sky Sports on a Sunday evening - it’s very strange with no crowd. There’s crowd noise being played thorugh the tannoy.

#Diary #Tumblr diary #lockdown #covid19 #lockdownuk

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darling-clemmy · 5 years

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100 Truths

Tagged by darling @xscullyx (thank you, lovely💓)

1. Real name: Chloe

2. Nicknames: Clo(clo)

3. Zodiac sign: Leo

4. Gender: Female

5. Nursery: One that sucked

6. Primary school: Public

7. Secondary school: Public, same school district

8. Hair color: Brown-auburny

9. Long or short: It’s like to my collarbones. it was to my waist before i cut it in february

10. Loud or quiet: Quiet, unless with my bestest friends

11. Sweats or jeans: Sweats but i’d never wear them in public

12. Phone or camera: I wish i had a real camera, but i don’t, so phone :((

13. Health freak: Not really, i’m trying to be healthier tho! but i’ve been a vegetarian for the past 4 years.

14. Drink or smoke: I’ve drank a little before, but everything has been gross. never smoked.

15. Do you have a crush on someone: Not currently

16. Political orientation: Definitely more democratic, but i’m under 18 so it isn’t like i can vote or anything

17. Piercings: Regular ear piercings, and i’ve been begging my mom to let me get a nose stud ://

18. Tattoos: None since i’m 15 but i have one planned out :))

HAVE YOU EVER [BEEN IN]:

19. Airplane: Not a commercial one, but i’ve been in my grandpa’s!

20. Car *accident*: Thankfully not!

21. Fist fight: No, and i don’t think i ever will hahah

FIRSTS:

22. Piercing: Ears

23. Best friend: My ex best friend and i were friends for like 4 years until she used me for a bunch of stuff. but now i have an amazing best friend!!

24. Instrument: I played the violin from 5th-9th grade, stopped because i got too busy and it wasn’t fun anymore.

25. Award: I don’t think i’ve gotten one?

26. Crush: In third grade i liked this boy in my grade who’s now student body president lol

27. Language: English

28. Big vacation: The furthest i’ve been away from home is NY to my grandparent’s house.

LASTS:

29. Person I talked to: My dad

30. Person I texted: A guy in my biology class

31. Person I watched: This is a concerning question

32. Food I ate: Watermelon!!

33. Movie I watched: Coco

34. Song I listened to: listen before i go—billie eilish

35. Thing I bought: Ice cream with my friends :))

36. Person I hugged: My mom before i went into school

FAVES:

37. Food: I really enjoy grilled cheese and bagels

38. Drinks: Iced tea!!

39. Clothing: Ripped jeans, boring shirts, slip on vans (vv basic ik) (i’ve been liking dresses more lately tho!)

40. Book: Everything, Everything by Nicola Yoon was pretty good!!

41. Color: A dark rosy-pink color (like the color of my blog ig)

42. Flower: Daisies

43. Music: Billie Eilish, Ariana Grande, Conan Gray, Troye Sivan

44. Movie: Coco or Totoro

45. Subjects: English

IN THE PAST YEAR IM

47. [] Kissed in the rain

48. [X] Celebrated Halloween

49. [] Had your heart broken

50. [] Went over the minutes on your cell phone

51. [] Someone questioned your sexual orientation

52. [] Used a weapon

53. [] Breathed fire (once again, concerning)

54. [] Had an abortion

55. [X] Done something you’ve regretted

56. [] Broke a promise

57. [X] Kept a secret

58. [X] Pretended to be happy

59. [] Met someone who changed your life

60. [X] Pretended to be sick

61. [] Left the country

62. [X] Tried something you normally wouldn’t like, and liked it

63. [X] Cried over the silliest thing

64. [] Ran a mile

65. [X] Went to the beach

66. [X] Stayed single (kinda idrk)

CURRENTLY:

67. Eating: Nothing

68. Drinking: Iced tea

69. Getting ready to: Try to finish and post some of those kissing requests!!💓

70. Listening to: imagine—Ariana Grande

71. Plans for tomorrow/today: Tomorrow i’ve gotta go to school, work on my final english essay/presentation, and hang out w my mom

72. Waiting for: School to be over!!!!

YOUR FUTURE:

73. Want kids: Yes! either 2 or 4

74. Want to get married: Yeah, but i’m more focused on just finding someone i love.

75. Careers in mind: Social worker

WHICH IS BETTER ON A PERSON/PARTNER:

76. Lips or eyes: Eyes

77. Shorter or taller: Taller, but p much everyone is taller than me.

78. Romantic or spontaneous: I’d enjoy both, but probably more romantic because sometimes spontaneity is bad.

79. Nice stomach or nice arms: Omg arms

80. Sensitive or loud: Either :))

81. Hook-up or relationship: Relationship def

82. Troublemaker or hesitant: Probably a troublemaker just because i’m so hesitant

HAVE YOU EVER:

83. Lost glasses/contacts: Haven’t had either

84. Ran away from home: Only as a joke when i was like 7

85. Held a weapon for self defense: Nope

86. Killed somebody: once AGAIN, concerning

87. Broken someone’s heart: I guess? idk it was complicated

88. Been arrested: No

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

90. Miracles: I really dunno

91. Yourself: Not extremely. i know what i do and don’t want in life, but i don’t really believe that i deserve anything or can do much.

92. Love at first sight: I like to think it’s real. maybe i’ll believe it more if it happens to me.

93. Heaven: I don’t believe in heaven/hell, but i also don’t think that once we die, we’re just gone forever

94. Santa Claus: No

95. Easter Bunny: No

96. Magic: No

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY

97. Is there one person you want to be with, right now: I’ve really been missing my sister lately, even though i saw her a few weeks ago.

98. Are you seriously happy with where you are in life: Sometimes things are still tough and there are some things i’d change, but it’s definitely better than it was a year and a half ago.

99. Are you happy with the person you’re with: Sadly single

100. Post as 100 truths and tag 5 people:

I dunno who has/hasn’t done this, so if you see this and would like to do it, then do it!! count that as a tag, i suppose💗💗

#100 truths #askclo #questions

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starchild--27 · 5 years

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85 questions

I was tagged by @kafkascupcake . This will be fun, so thanks ^^

rules: answer 85 statements about yourself, then tag 20 people

last

1. drink – water with lemon flavour

2. phone call - my hair dresser (if i ignore the fact that i accidently called my dad a few momnets ago when i wanted to look up my last phone call - ofc this had to happen xD)

3. text message - i told some kid from my spanish class tht we didn’t have spanish class last week

4. song you listened to – Californiacation by Red Hot Chili Peppers

5. time you cried - three days ago i think, but i waas at the verge of crying yesterday evening

6. dated someone twice? – nope. i never dated anyone

7. kissed someone and regretted it – nope

8. been cheated on – no

9. lost someone special – i’m so grateful to say that i never lost anyone in my life and i am so afraid of the day this will happen to me

10. been depressed - kind of. i have my depressed moments but everyone has at some point

11. gotten drunk and thrown up – never, i’m not drinking much

fave colours

12. navy blue

13. black

14. metallic shades of basically every colour

in the last year have you…

15. made new friends – i’m always careful with the word friend when it comes to my real life, but let’s say i got to know some people better that have been around for a longer time but i never really interacted with. on the internet things are a little different, so i can say i’ve interacted with a lot of people here and i can’t help but treat them as friends

16. fallen out of love – not in the last year

17. laughed until you cried - multiple times xD

18. found out someone was talking about you – i really don’t know and i hate that i can’t say this wouldn’t bother me because i really want to know what people think of me - just to be able to understand why they treat me how they do.

19. met someone who changed you - oh, i really don’t know. i think i didn’t change that much in the last 365 days

20. found out who your friends are – it was a little more than a year ago, but yes i did.

21. kissed someone on your Facebook friends list – i don’t even have facebook

general

22. how many of your facebook friends do you know irl – since i don’t have facebook i’ll do this for instagram and there it is probably a minority since i follow countless art pages, celebrities, fanpages, animal pages, political pages, people i don’t know in real life, …

23. do you have any pets - yes - a black cat with the name Black Pearl, which we gave him before i even knew about the song by EXO ^^ his name referred to the ship from Pirates of the Carribbean first xD

24. do you want to change your name – i did in the past, because my name is very rare where i live. but i started to like it after some time. the great thing is that it’s meaning differs since no one really knows it’s true origin.

25. what did you do for your last birthday - i invited my two best friends but one happened to be sick at that day (ㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠ) so we were only two but it was great anyway. since i was born the day after walpurgis night we went to the bonfire and spent some time there

26. what time did you wake up today – 7 am but i slept in again and got at 11:20

27. what were you doing at midnight last night – reading or sleeping, i don’t know for sure

28. what is something you can’t wait for – vacation with my family and the summer holidays in general (school was … much in the last weeks.)

30. what are you listening to right now – the sound of me slamming my fingers on my laptop’s keyboard while writing this lol

31. have you ever talked to a person named tom – i did, in fact to more than one

32. something that gets on your nerves – that i have to go to school for one more year (i hate this place wholeheartedly) but i don’t know what to do with my life after graduating

33. most visited website - tumblr and youtube

34. hair color – my natural hair colour is brown but i dye it ginger red and i love it

35. long or short hair – pretty long actually, but i have curls so it’s pretty hard to notice how long

36. do you have a crush on someone - if we ignore my celebrity crushes then … i don’t know…probably no. i’m not sure about this one boy though but…yeah, i don’t really know him that well and i probably only like the idea i have of how he could be. (this is btw so typical for me xD)

37. what do you like about yourself – don’t get me wrong, i know it sounds tragical and sad, but i don’t have something i like 100% about myself. i am used to it though because i’ve been this way since forever, having high standards for me (and for others probably too, which is very unfair from me) but the closest to 100% is my talent for music.

38. want any piercings? – only at my ears

39. blood type – A positive

40. nicknames – the most common nickname for my name is Selmi but hardly anyone except for my mom and my sister calls me like that anymore. other than that i have the feeling my friends and i don’t have nicknames but more like pet names for each other. like, i was called “Flauschebausch” (in english “Fluffpuff”) not that long ago (it referred to my hair). i would also count “squirrel”, “the stars” and all that stuff as nicknames but we don’t really call each other often like that in person xD

41. relationship status - single

42. zodiac - Taurus (but most of the stuff people say about tauruses are not 100% true for me)

43. pronouns - she/her

44. fave tv shows – lately i finished Game Of Thrones and i liked it so damn much, especially the ending (i really don’t get why it was so hated, but i’ll not explain further - i don’t want to write an essay here xD). i also enjoy watching Gilmore Girls from time to time, but hardly anyone in my generation knows it. and since i read it at @kafkascupcake ‘s post for this tag i just remembered how much i liked Memories of the Alhambra too (gosh, how i waited for every episode to air … i still remember this impatient feeling so well)

45. tattoos – i’m not allowed to have any yet but i’m thinking about getting smaller ones later since i think tattoos are pretty. buuuuut i’m also afraid because i can’t really imagine the pain

46. right or left handed - right

47. ever had surgery – yeah. unspectecular story tho.

48. piercings - only earrings but one of my friends and i plan on getting helix piercings soon (originally this was planned to be done before last christmas but we never found time)

49. sport – no no no no no. i hate it. i always did. i did some horse riding in my childhood but that’s it. i’m just not able to coordinate my body so a fail at basically every kind of sport. and i am easily frustrated when i fail at something so i never really tried to ace sports.

50. vacation – my last vacation was when i visited Berlin with my two best friends and m next vacation will be in Denmark with my family

51. trainers – Converse Chucks, always and forever

more general

52. eating – i used to be a very picky eater but it gets better with every year. lately i really like spicy food. but i also have a terrible sweet tooth. i am surprised how i am still like super slim …

53. drinking – a trait i inherited from my dad: i love milk. but i also like juices, tea, coffee (with milk ofc xD) and plain water too

54. i’m about to watch – Avengers Endgame. like today. in 2 hrs.

55. waiting for – my train ride to the next bigger city for seeing endgame. and for me getting an idea what i want to do with my life

56. want – to travel and to make music. my two passions

57. get married – i don’t think it’s necessary for a happy relationship but it depends on the person. to be honest, i like the thought of getting married but i totally understand if someone doesn’t like it.

58. career – the biggest question mark in my life rn

which is better

59. hugs or kisses - hugs. i can’t even explain why. but hugs.

60. lips or eyes - i thinj i look at the eyes first. but i am damned if a person has beautiful lips too

61. shorter or taller – taller

62. older or younger - not important

63. nice arms or stomach – yeah ofc stomachs are great. but let’s be real here: i’m a swooning bitch for nice arms.

64. hookup or relationship – relationship. i am a hopeless romantic

65. troublemaker or hesitant - i am an overthinker, which makes me the epitome of hesitant.

have you ever

66. kissed a stranger – never kissed anyone lol

67. drank hard liquor – only mixed with juice

68. lost glasses - yeah. wasn’t cool.bc without glasses i am literally blind

69. turned someone down - kind of.

70. sex on first date - no

71. broken someone’s heart – i hope not.

72. had your heart broken – yip. my first heavy crush was not that happy. but i am over it since the guy was and still is a jerk and i don’t even know why i fell for him anymore

73. been arrested - no

74. cried when someone died - yes

75. fallen for a friend – never

do you believe in

76. yourself – depends on the situation.

77. miracles - there are moments in which i do

78. love at first sight - yes

79. santa claus - no

80. kiss on a first date – yeah.. i think itmight happen xD

81. angels - who knows? it would be great though.

other

82. best friend’s name - deer of the sun @swiftfeatherscorner and cat of the moon @fille-de-janvier xD i don’t know if they’d like to have their real names published here but here you ahve their tumblrs

83. eye color - i looked it up someday and it’s called glasz - a strange mix between green, blue and grey with some golden dots and marks. depends on the lightning which colour is stronger.

84. fave movie – impossible to tell.

85. fave actor – also impossible to tell. there are so many good actors in this world

i’m not even sure if 20 people will read this so i’ll just tag everyone who has time to answer 85 questions xD

#tag game

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autoirishlitdiscourses · 3 years

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Discourse of Sunday, 22 August 2021

In this case. You might also get some informed ideas here I think that your ethical principles are often articulated in the English-language writer from Coleridge's time forward. It is in a single text, you might conceivably wind up where you found it there and did an excellent job! In any case, one thing, and these small-scale course concerns, and may be productive to discuss you may leave your luggage to section and leave it at the final. Think about using a different direction. Don't just pick the shortest midterm essay of anyone whose test I graded. If you are prepared and in a few emails from students already asking about crashing my sections but don't care which, if you have a strong argument about it. You went short, or see me: perhaps we can talk about authors other than brute strength. Pdf, if you really want to deal with this ambiguity; you also gave a solid job here. My intent was not necessarily the only one of the texts you examine, and they had a good job digging in to the assigned texts listed on the final early next quarter.

Grading Rubric for Analytical Papers I expect or want you to mean by passionate, and you'll get that, with a lot of important issues in your final exam, so I assume, but if that's the case and I quite liked it. It's not that bad an experience that should turn out to be docking you points for demonstrating correct knowledge I'd rather you did quite a solid performance tonight! A sample paper available on the particulars of your discussion questions if any, are they representative of how she usually is, again, I think that this is a mother: that sexual desire is inherently damaging; that you have to schedule a presentation, not only mothers themselves, but most of these things but could get a clearer idea. Check your U-Mail account! I promise that I'm not faulting you for your paper. I hope you're feeling better now. Have a good, but what the author thinks is a fascinating topic that you prepared more material than was required, and I'm operating on the due date that you discovered that time.

There has never been to let you keep going past ten minutes if it had been delivered more smoothly, though they'll probably require a fair and often rather graceful, and mechanics may also find helpful in any way on this you picked those particular texts. Hi! Flip through them first-in, if you need to satisfy the requirement that your ideas develop naturally out of ink, network connections go down might involve Umberto Boccioni: Dynamism of a thing is that you believe that anyone writing one of which parts of your own original work/. This includes your midterm, attendance, and it was written too close to every comment, and examining a set of arguments about a particular story, called Hand mit Ringen. I hope you had quite a difficult text to which you can make up for Twitter? Got it. I'm still trying to eat up time that you explicitly look for cues that tell me when large numbers of people who recite together get the maximum possible credit on dates. 59 instead of assuming that you can better succeed in this range is slightly lower than a general idea, you did a strong manner here. You are welcome to attend. You must declare in advance as part of how she goes about getting it in terms of the play, and make your claims. Yes, there are places where your phrasing is suboptimal or doesn't quite say what you think it's potentially a good choice for you to clarify your own argument, rather than lecture-oriented than it could be. Thanks for being such a great idea to have thought of that motivation should be rewarded with the Office of Judicial Affairs. Something I wish I would never write that on the grading expectations for you to twenty minutes if it seems that trying to satisfy breadth requirements that you are having difficulties with the sweatbeads as big as berries moment in your thesis statement expresses, and how this portion. If you need to indicate the specific nature of your thoughts might be productive: think about your own very sophisticated and nuanced as you're capable of doing this in any other questions, OK? I feel bad about that character.

Participatory-ness, I think, too. O'Hanlon and, I will be distributed in lecture worked really hard to be generalizing about what an ideal relationship with Milly reading the poem even more, this does not exempt you from attending is that it's helpful. You worked hard this quarter. I take you.

Remember that you are, how effective is he at representing what Gertie is generally pretty minor errors didn't hurt your grade, which is an inappropriate choice. But analysis requires moving outside of my head this afternoon, so no one talking but you picked those particular texts side by side? Were everywhere but operated independently and no more commonly yes responses, but I'm perhaps not, what you've sent me an email saying that you made two genuinely tiny errors, punctuation, and all of the poem on the final, you lose the opportunity to do this assignment is more demoralizing than being there and nowhere else. Can Aksoy also overheard the conversation.

Section, episode 6, which at least 97. You showed that you have any questions, administrative matters, and that what he might call on you as the assignment write-ups except as a group is not caught up on reading will probably be better to avoid responding directly to the major thematic issues. /Or symbolism of the students, too is it used to control women and his conception of Irish culture during the quarter a very good job digging in to what does that work?

You were clearly a bit early, and I'll pass that on the final, you'll have to recite at all for coming to section tonight, along with several other thematic issues. 53 If not, you have some very, very nicely acted. You can absolutely go on and perform a short poem was very productive, perhaps, provided that you've sketched out, but ran rather short.

So I had better answers for you straighten out I know that you must write a draft, and what kind of plans for your audio/visual text of Pearse's speech without too much difficulty; there are some mostly comparatively minor errors. Have a good passage and gave a strong knowledge of the course at this point and think about the very end of section, or it may be that the professor wants is for you. One would be ideal for me if you haven't yet graded, you may also be read as anything other than quite good and your recitation plans and specific text as someone else steals your thunder thematically, to approach the question of whether this matters, and I'll pass it out before his exam? I'm not faulting you there. I think that this has paid off a number of excellent observations pay off in my regular office hour that day. I try very hard to be just a matter of nitpicky formalistic grammatical policing, but I need a copy of the recording of your plans by tomorrow, 1: IDs of 2-4 around, so it's unlikely to result in a way to answer this question: they're summarizing the rest of the section for you, I'd like to discuss your plans requirement. Which path you choose as additional sources in their papers, I think, OK? You have three options for other students in the first time, and would give you a bit more rigor. I've posted a copy of Ulysses, and only looking at the document from IMDb. 79-80, perhaps Gertie's thoughts, will result in a lot out of ink, network connections go down might involve Umberto Boccioni: Dynamism of a great deal more during quarters when students aren't doing a good day,/please come talk to other people react to Dexter may very well here, and not because I think that you examine, and might be intimidated by Shakespeare's stature and then look at some point in the/optional section Thanksgiving week, whether or not I apply the late penalty, which is rather large. There are a few minutes afterwards, and that part of the early twentieth-century ideas of others to be excellent. You added the before night in section. I'm proctoring a make-up on your life this quarter, I think that you will have to pick one option from section tonight. Yes, you should consider it required reading, but just of individual passages: In-progress, very good job last week were good, but keeping the question?

#Irish literature #automatically generated text #Patrick Mooney #Python #Markov chains

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tweaksy · 6 years

Text

Swedish Girl Creates A Robot To Do Her Homework! You Won't Believe What Happens Next!

Fandom: Overwatch

Ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14787240

Square Filled: My First Time Writing Robot

Rating: General

Summary: Passing grade 8 for Brigitte means acing this essay. Unfortunately, just reading the essay questions almost killed her. Maybe she can think of another way to get through this? And hey- if things don't work out Reinhardt is always there to bail her out!

Word Count: 2095

Written for @biggobingobango

Respond to one of the prompts below in an essay of 500 words or more. Your essay must be peer edited, be free of grammatical and spelling errors, and use transitionary phrases.

1. A great deal of the novel focuses on Sophia’s blue earrings. How do the earrings relate to each scene in which they are mentioned? (pg. 23, 47, 89, 103, 217) What is the significance behind the colour blue? Would the meaning change if they were a different type of jewellery?

Brigitte stopped reading and tossed the paper across the room, slumping back in her chair. Writing essays was already awful, and writing essays on a book she hated was just excruciating. While her 8th grade teacher, Mrs. Carnell, was a great teacher, she was terrible at choosing engaging, enjoyable books. Even the students who more keen on literature struggled with her book choices, as well as the writing topics. This meant that Brigitte, who had more of a head for math and science, was doomed. So very doomed.

Ingrid poked her head into her daughter’s room. “How is the essay going, dear?” She asked.

“Great,” Brigitte sighed, scratching her cat behind the ear.

Ingrid looked down at the paper lying on the floor. “Don’t you need this to write your essay?” she asked. She glanced over the paper, frowning.

“Isn’t it bad?” Brigitte asked.

“It’s not… well, it could be worse,” Ingrid said with a small laugh. “I’m going to the store to pick up some groceries, try to get something done by the time I get back, okay? Remember that Mrs. Carnell said she won’t take any more late assignments from you.” Ingrid placed the paper back on Brigitte’s desk, ruffled her hair, and slowly closed the door upon her exit. Brigitte sighed again and picked up the paper.

2. Toni makes many references to Shakespeare’s soliloquies while trying to woo Sophia. How do these speeches (pg. 54, 76, 79, 93, 147) match or differ from Shakespeare’s famous soliloquies? How do these change the tension and mood in the scene?

Brigitte threw the paper on the floor once again. She couldn’t do this. No way. There were still three more topics she could choose from and she knew that just reading through them might actually kill her. There was no way she could do this. But there was also no way she couldn’t do this. Not if she wanted to pass grade 8, that is. Which meant if she couldn’t do it, yet it had to be done… then what if someone else did it. Or, something? An idea came to her.

Brigitte slipped on a pair of shoes and walked to the garage and into her dad’s workshop. He was away for a few weeks; he wouldn’t mind if she borrowed some of his equipment. First things first: some drafting paper and a pencil. Once the blueprint was made, she needed some metal, screws, wires… she danced around the workshop, tossing equipment onto the desk against the wall. A bit of this, a bit of that. Why not this? Oh, we’ll surely need some of that! Once everything was gathered it was time to get to work. That essay would be done by Monday, like it or not.

-----

Ingrid opened the door to the workshop. “There you are!” she sighed, looking at Brigitte’s back. “Supper’s almost ready… shouldn’t you be doing homework?”

“I’m taking a break,” she mumbled around the pencil in her mouth.

“Okay, well, be inside in five minutes. Make sure you wash up, too.”

Brigitte mumbled a sound of confirmation, still staring intently at her creation. Five minutes wasn’t much time, but she could make use of the break. The body was built, the programming was almost ready to go, all she had to do was download the correct files. She clicked on the ones she needed to transfer over. Connect it to the printer, connect it to the internet, upload a digital copy of the book, put in the language file, a few more clicks and… done! The rest of the work could happen during supper. She wiped her hands on her pants, cringed as they came out more black than they did before, and decided it would be a good idea to go wash up and change.

As she exited the bathroom she bumped into her younger brother, who was about to head in to wash his hands. “Where have you been?” He asked. “Remember mom said you shouldn’t use dad’s tools without him around.”

“I wasn’t using anything dangerous,” she rolled her eyes, “just making a simple robot.”

His eyes brightened up. “A robot? What does it do? Can it shoot lasers?”

“No,” she laughed, “but that would be a good idea. Actually it’s supposed to read my book for my literature class, read the essay questions from the teacher, and write an essay for me. So you see, it’s written by me because the robot was created by me, but I don’t have to do the awful work.”

“That’s so cool!” he shouted. “Can I use it for my homework?”

“If it works as well as I think it should!” she said with a wink.

Of course the robot worked perfectly. At least, there was a neat pile of papers sitting at the bottom of the printer, stapled nicely together, cover page and references and everything. Brigitte flipped through the booklet without actually reading it. Yup, that looked like an essay. Good enough. She tossed it into her backpack and pulled out her brand-new copy of Half-Life 3. She had a lot of work to do if she wanted to finish it during launch week.

-----

“So that’s why I built a robot to write the stupid essay for me. And honestly everything was perfect except for one thing- apparently I clicked the wrong language and instead of hitting ‘Swedish’ I hit ‘Spanish’ instead, so my whole essay was in Spanish! So of course Mrs. Carnell phoned my mom and they had a conference and I have to write yet another essay now and she’s all like ‘oh, I know that you hate this topic so let me make it up to you by giving you a fun topic about science!’ since I just like, have to show my writing ability or whatever, so now I have to write a dumb essay about bees.” Brigitte finally ran out of breath and had to stop to breathe for a moment. Reinhardt took this opportunity to speak.

“Aww, I’m sorry to hear that, Brigitte. But you know, you could have just asked me to write it in the first place! I always did great at essay writing when I was in school! And remember, I am always just a phone call away.”

Brigitte’s eyes widened. “Would you, maybe, write my new essay for me? The bee one?” She asked.

“Of course!” Reinhardt laughed. “Just tell me the topic and I will write it for you! The only thing is you will have to translate it to Swedish. So you will still be writing it, right? I’m just giving you the content!” He laughed again.

“Thank you so much!” Brigitte yelled into the phone. “I’ll text you the topic, okay? Seriously, thank you Reinhardt. You are a life saver.”

“Any time, dear. Say hello to your mom for me, okay?”

“I will!”

Brigitte ended the call and hugged her phone. She was going to get through this, no matter what!

-----

Reinhardt pushed open the heavy doors to the public library. He looked around for a moment, then approached the counter. “Excuse me!”

The woman behind the counter jumped, not expecting him to be quite so loud. “Yes?” She asked.

“I need some books on bees- where could I find them?”

“Follow me. And sir, please try to keep it down,” she whispered, getting up and leading him towards the area.

“Sorry, that’s my bad!” He bellowed with a hearty laugh. The librarian sighed.

“Here is our section on animal books. It appears that there are some on bees right here. If you need a place to start, there is also a shelf of encyclopaedias against that wall.”

The librarian left and Reinhardt began to pull any book that looked vaguely relevant off the shelf. Plus some that weren’t relevant, but looked interesting anyways. Maybe he should stop by the sci-fi/fantasy section, as well…

Pretty soon he was standing in the line to check out, a mountain of books in his arms. A young boy looked up at him, in awe by the sheer amount of books he was carrying. Reinhardt smiled down at him. The book he was holding in his hands caught his eye. “Well now, is that ‘Dragon Riders of Riveron’? I used to love reading those books as a kid! In fact, I remember sitting on the steps of this very library, waiting for it to open so I could be the first to get my hands on the new books as they were released! There was a kind old man that used to work here who, whenever the new book came out, he would send me an e-mail and say that he just got the new book in and it would be on the shelf the next day! And I would get in right as the library opened and I would make a beeline to the shelf and usually I would be done the book by that very evening!” Reinhardt laughed again.

Every library patron was staring at the boisterous man shouting in the middle of the library line. Even the librarians were staring, book in one hand, scanner in the other, neither hand moving. They all seemed slightly disturbed, aside from the young boy, who was looking up with stars in his eyes. “I’ve never met anyone else who has read these,” he said. “I always try to get other kids at my school to try them but they make fun of me.”

Reinhardt let out a gasp. “Make fun of you! Well, I’ll have you know that there is nothing to be ashamed of when it comes to good books!” Reinhardt dropped his books down on a counter with a loud crash, grabbed a pen and scrap paper off the desk and scribbled down a number. “Here you go, call me any time you need someone to talk to about them!”

The kid grabbed the paper and gingerly put it in his pocket. “Thank you,” he whispered.

Work slowly resumed and eventually Reinhardt had all his books checked out. Now it was time to return- and get Brigitte her essay!”

-----

Hark! The humble honey bee. Busily she buzzes; to and fro, up and down, elegantly buzzing from flower to flower. But just how does she do that? Such a large, hardworking body supported by such small, fragile wings makes it seem like flight should be an impossibility. But is this really the case?

Brigitte squinted at her essay. Is this really how you’re supposed to write an essay? Aren’t you supposed to use fancy words and sentences that last half a page, and sound as smart and hoity-toity as possible? She shrugged, Reinhardt was the adult. He knew best. All she could do was trust him, and keep translating this essay.

When she handed it in it was a few days before she heard anything back from her teacher. Finally, one day just before she was about to leave for lunch, Mrs. Carnell caught her at her locker. “Brigitte, I want to talk to you about your essay.”

Brigitte took a deep breath, looked up at her, and asked a small “yes?”

Mrs. Carnell pulled the essay out of a folder in her hands. “Honestly, I have never seen an essay quite like this before. I can tell that you were being very sarcastic throughout the whole thing but even so, it was entertaining to read and possesses a level of engagement you don’t usually see in an essay at this age. Generally students are so invested in trying to show off how intelligent they are they forgo any sort of style in favour of showing off. The content was good, you had great evidence and transitions, and honestly, it was an extremely well-done essay.”

Mrs. Carnell dropped the essay into Brigitte’s hands. “Congratulations, young lady.”

Brigitte looked down at her mark and smiled. It took a few tries, but she got there in the end. And hey, as her father always says, “hard work pays off!”

#BIGGOBINGOBANGO #Overwatch fanfiction #Overwatch #Brigitte Lindholm #Reinhardt Wilhelm #tweaksy writes

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tessavirtueandmoir · 6 years

Text

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?

Daniel aka one of the Finnish guys cause I didn’t want to get lost in the club (I also hate club so it was like a double whammy)

2. Are you outgoing or shy?

Is outgoingly shy a thing? I used to be super shy and still am around guys, but im definitely more outgoing in everyday life than I used to be

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?

MY BESTFRIEND WHO FREAKING FLEW TO ENGLAND THE DAY I CAME HOME AND I HAVEN’T BEEN ABLE TO SEE HER YET.

4. Are you easy to get along with?

Depends on who you ask, I guess.

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

More likely than not.

6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

Blond hair, blue eyes… the eye colour doesnt really matter tbh but that seems to be the trend. Not douchey.

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

Uhh.. that’s wishful thinking.

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?

Those dang Finnish boys #lifecrisis

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

Yes.

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

Probs one of those Finnish boys

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

I sent an article to my mom about how Canada was gonna be colder than Antarctica and mars. lmao I love this freaking country.

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

Freedom 90 - Pitch Perfect Cast

Saturday Night - Whigfield

New Year’s Day - TSwift

New Rules - Dua Lipa

Hopeless Romantic - Scott Middough

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

Yeah dude point me to a girl who doesn’t

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?

Lmao no not really

15. What good thing happened this summer?

I turned 20 and apparently had a life resolution. Ditch those crappy people y’all, they aint worth your time

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

Debatable…

17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

18. Do you still talk to your first crush?

Don’t even remember who my first crush was so that’s probably a no.

19. Do you like bubble baths?

Yo. My kryptonite. My res only had showers for the 4 months I was there and I legit cried when I say my bathtub so.

20. Do you like your neighbors?

As long as I can’t hear them, I don’t really care

21. What are you bad habits?

Getting super snippy when I’m hungry. Um… constantly being on my phone? Idk what else. Being blunt?

22. Where would you like to travel?

I just want to go back to England at this point

23. Do you have trust issues?

hahahah AHAHAHAHAHHA bye

24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

the fact I didnt wake up until like mid afternoon in the uk… now literally nothing

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?

My stomach? Or maybe my arms

26. What do you do when you wake up?

Check my phone notifs

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?

Maybe a tad darker because im literally pale af but otherwise no

28. Who are you most comfortable around?

my best friends aka girls

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?

No? One of my ex’s once told one of my friends to check on me though cause he was worried.. it was strange.

30. Do you ever want to get married?

Also, debatable. I’m loving my alone life right now.

31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail?

If it wasn’t I would literally cry so. Every time I get it cut we make sure it goes into a pony because of dance and stuff.

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

Anna Kendrick and is Tessa Virtue a celebrity? I think she is. Wow… that is quite the threesome honestly. Gotta have different life experiences I suppose.

33. Spell your name with your chin.

grasysdoihj

34. Do you play sports? What sports?

Dance and soccer. dance is a sport dont argue with me

35. Would you rather live without TV or music?

TV I guess. But either option would be pretty lame.

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?

In my 20 years, yeah probably

37. What do you say during awkward silences?

Nothing, I usually check my phone or something

38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

Not an inconsiderate douchebag. And someone that lives in the same country as me.

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?

NEWLOOK, River Island, ASOS, RW and Co, Dynamite (sometimes the Bay)

40. What do you want to do after high school?

Be a lawyer.

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

Nah man.

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean?

I’m fucking mad and u best walk away before I slit you in half. Or I’m tired. Or im not comfortable with the situation

43. Do you smile at strangers?

I barely even look up so no

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?

Bottom of the ocean

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

That maybe it’ll be cold enough for me to take a bath at some point… I have a lame Canadian life. And I also don’t wanna be a university drop out so there’s also that.

46. What are you paranoid about?

People following me… like not on social media. Just like in general

47. Have you ever been high?

Nope

48. Have you ever been drunk?

Potentially? Idk man, probably not

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

Oh yeah. But I told my friends about it so does that really count?

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

Navy

51. Ever wished you were someone else?

Everyone wishes they were T Virtue so.

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?

I wish I could make myself want to go to the gym an exercise. But yet, here I am

53. Favourite makeup brand?

Anastasia Beverley Hills/Tarte/Fenty Beauty

54. Favourite store?

Did I not already answer this?

55. Favourite blog?

Mine. Shameless self promo

https://graysonwadsworth2.wixsite.com/hayitsgray

56. Favourite colour?

Grey/Teal/Burgundy

57. Favourite food?

G A R L I C B R E A D

58. Last thing you ate?

I’m about to eat a huge ass bowl of oatmeal

59. First thing you ate this morning?

This huge ass bowl of oatmeal. It’s 9:25 PM in case y’all were wondering.

60. Ever won a competition? For what?

Many. For dance.

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?

No, I’m an angel. Just kidding.

62. Been arrested? For what?

Nope.

63. Ever been in love?

Yep.

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?

Happened on a cruise ship in the middle of the Mediterranean Sea and I stupidly decided to play a game where we were trying to get our faces as close as possible without kissing… I was dumb okay lmao.

65. Are you hungry right now?

Mildly.

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?

I talk to my Tumblr friends more than my real friends

67. Facebook or Twitter?

Twitter

68. Twitter or Tumblr?

Why is instagram not a choice. Tumblr I guess.

69. Are you watching tv right now?

I’m watching the movie what not to expect when you’re expecting

70. Names of your bestfriends?

Harneet, Keira, Emmy, Katerina, Andy, Meghan x 2, Madi, Sydney, Emily, Lauren, Cassidy… wow… that’s so many

71. Craving something? What?

Not to be sick.

72. What colour are your towels?

My personal towels are teal. But we have brown, black. and grey ones in the bathroom too.

72. How many pillows do you sleep with?

there’s 6 on my bed right now

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?

does one laying at the foot of the bed count cause otherwise no

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?

I legitimately cleaned out my entire closet this week and found my ENTIRE collection of webkinz so if we’re gonna count those probs like 300 lmao

75. Favourite animal?

Elephant

76. What colour is your underwear?

Pink

77. Chocolate or Vanilla?

Vanilla

78. Favourite ice cream flavour?

Cookie Dough OR French crisp from Laura Secord

79. What colour shirt are you wearing?

Grey

80. What colour pants?

Grey, white and pink

81. Favourite tv show?

GREYS ANATOMY

82. Favourite movie?

Moulin Rouge or Angels and Demons

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?

Mean girls who are you

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?

Jump Street

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?

Janice

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?

Dory or Crush

87. First person you talked to today?

I honestly have no idea, probably meg though… or I definitely snapchatted people

88. Last person you talked to today?

Meg

89. Name a person you hate?

Well, that would be mean.

90. Name a person you love?

My British bestie, honestly, I don’t know why I love her so much. It’s strange. My cat is the next backup.

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?

No? Violence is never the answer. Passive aggressiveness is

92. In a fight with someone?

Not that I know of

93. How many sweatpants do you have?

All of my sweats are basically roots, and I honestly have too many

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?

TOO MANY

95. Last movie you watched?

Pitch Perfect 2

96. Favourite actress?

Anna Kendrick OR Reese Witherspoon

97. Favourite actor?

I am currently blanking on male actors at the moment. Let’s just go with Ryan Reynolds cause he’s funny af and married to Blake so

98. Do you tan a lot?

I burn a lot.

99. Have any pets?

A really bitchy cat

100. How are you feeling?

Sick #iloveairplanes

101. Do you type fast?

Yes, unnaturally fast. I can also type without looking at the keys which weirds a lot of people out.

102. Do you regret anything from your past?

Doesn’t everyone? It wasn’t stuff that I did myself though

103. Can you spell well?

Usually yes, lately no. I need to go back to school obviously

104. Do you miss anyone from your past?

My grandma

105. Ever been to a bonfire party?

Yep

106. Ever broken someone’s heart?

Accidentally on purpose yes

107. Have you ever been on a horse?

Yes, and I got bucked off and now refuse to ride another horse

108. What should you be doing?

Writing an essay that’s due on Friday

109. Is something irritating you right now?

The fact that I can’t fall asleep, but that’s the norm so

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?

Only when they broke my heartttttt

111. Do you have trust issues?

I swear to god I’ve already answered this one

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?

My best british friend. She legit left me crying in the middle of the club

113. What was your childhood nickname?

Gray gray. Or Gray goose.

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?

Yes

115. Do you play the Wii?

I used to. My console is in my closet now though

116. Are you listening to music right now?

Yes, always.

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?

MA FAVE. It’s the only soup I eat.

118. Do you like Chinese food?

YES. MY OTHER FAVE.

119. Favourite book?

13 Reasons Why, or Atonement. Soon to be: Scrappy Little Nobody

120. Are you afraid of the dark?

No.

121. Are you mean?

I am blunt. Sometimes those two can get confused

122. Is cheating ever okay?

No, y’all are scum bye

123. Can you keep white shoes clean?

Uh… if my white shoes get dirty I clean them so they’re white again

124. Do you believe in love at first sight?

No, but I believe in crushes at first sight #themodel

125. Do you believe in true love?

I mean.. maybe.

126. Are you currently bored?

Yes, hence why I’m answering all these questions

127. What makes you happy?

My friends

128. Would you change your name?

I currently am, but not my first name.

129. What your zodiac sign?

Cancer the crabbbbbb

130. Do you like subway?

Uh…. sometimes. But it’s not my go to

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

Yikes, this has legit happened to me and I had to dip so fast im not even lying

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

Definitely one of those Finnish boys

133. Favourite lyrics right now?

Take back your picture in a frame

sometimes the clothes do not make the man

134. Can you count to one million?

Who would ever try that? It would take forever.

135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

When I told all my profs I couldn’t write my midterm cause I had a concussion and I went to the Dominican instead #rebel

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?

Closed

137. How tall are you?

5′ 3″

138. Curly or Straight hair?

Straight hair that is curled

139. Brunette or Blonde?

Blonde

140. Summer or Winter?

Neither, I hate both. But if I had to choose, summer

141. Night or Day?

Night

142. Favourite month?

May

143. Are you a vegetarian?

No, I’d literally die because I hate vegetables

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?

milk

145. Tea or Coffee?

T E A

146. Was today a good day?

Tbh I laid in bed all day so that’s pretty ideal

147. Mars or Snickers?

Mars

148. What’s your favourite quote?

Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind - Dr. Suess (how philosophical wow)

149. Do you believe in ghosts?

Nope

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?

The young team were still getting most of their ice time in Ilderton and were preparing for the Western Ontario sectionals in the juvenile category, but in late autumn of 1998, just a week before sectionals, Scott broke his right arm playing flag football. That is the longest sentence ever wow.

#personal #I cant believe I was so bored I answered 150 questions about myself #Jesus murphy

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riskhedge · 5 years

Text

The Single Most Powerful Insight that Will Help You Find the Next Amazon, Google, or Netflix

If you haven’t read me before, let me briefly introduce myself to give you a little context.

I’m Stephen McBride, Chief Analyst at RiskHedge. My job is to find under-the-radar disruptor stocks that are set to dominate the world in the next 10 years… and make investors rich in the process.

Think of buying Amazon a decade ago…

Source: RiskHedge

Or Netflix…

But as I said last week in my essay that got over 3.5 million views, the days of companies like Netflix are numbered.

In this article, I’ll explain why you have to dump these big darling companies… and how to spot stocks that are likely to become the next Amazon.

It All Comes Down to Three Little Lists

Please look the following three lists over carefully. Heck, print them out and keep them at your desk. They’re that important.

Together they hold the key to getting rich through investing in disruption.

This first list shows the 10 largest public companies on earth—ranked by market cap—in early 2001:

Source: RiskHedge

You probably recognize most of these stocks.

In 2001, they were the best of the best. The biggest of the big. They were household names that had reigned over their industries and handed investors big profits.

Now I’m going to add a second column.

It will show the same rankings a decade later—in early 2011.

Source: RiskHedge

You see what happened?

Seven of the top 10 stocks were displaced, inflicting big losses on many investors who were unfortunate enough to own them.

For example, from 2001–2018, GE stock plunged 79%, Citi collapsed 89%, and Vodafone fell 56%.

Only Exxon Mobil, Royal Dutch Shell, and Microsoft survived. But even these three “survivors” posted terrible returns.

Microsoft fell 15% between 2001 and 2011. Exxon and Shell underperformed the broad market.

Losing 11% of your money over 17 years when the market doubles is a financial disaster.

Now let’s add one more column for late 2018:

Source: RiskHedge

As you can see, this time only 2 of the 10 survived. And once again… the stocks of many of the losers tanked.

Averaged together, the eight losers lost -17% from 2011 to late 2018. The S&P 500 gained roughly 115% in that time.

Now, if you were investing back in 2011, chances are you owned some of the money losers on this list.

Remember, they weren’t obscure penny stocks. They were 8 of the 10 largest stocks on earth!

Even if you didn’t buy them intentionally, you probably owned them. After all, these were the biggest, most popular, most written-about stocks.

Unfortunately, many mutual funds, index funds, ETFs, and retirement plans were stuffed with these losers.

Now, Imagine a Fourth Column Labeled “2024”

How many of today’s top 10 do you think will still be on the list in 2024?

Wouldn’t you agree that at least seven or eight of those stocks will perform poorly going forward?

That is a powerful piece of information. It means most of the biggest and richest companies on earth are typically bad investments.

Glance up at the 2018 list once more. You’ll find it reads like a “Who’s Who” of the most popular US stocks today.

Apple. Microsoft. Google. Facebook. Johnson & Johnson. JP Morgan. Berkshire Hathaway.

These are the stocks everyone pays attention to. They’re the stocks your barber or taxi driver brag about owning. CNBC anchors go on and on about these stocks seven days a week.

Yet, as you now know, the evidence is clear: You’re best off avoiding most of today’s most popular stocks.

Seven or eight of the 10 are likely to tread water, at best, over the next couple of years.

More likely, they’ll lose money.

I’ll repeat: Owning the most popular, most talked about, and largest companies in the world is a money-losing strategy.

How You Can Flip This Great Danger into Your Great Edge

It comes down to the life cycle of disruptive businesses.

You want to sell the tired old giant companies that have already peaked and are sure to fall.

And you want to buy the “rising stars.”

In other words, you want to own the stocks that will make the list in 2024.

Leading up to 2018, the 10 stocks that top the 2018 list were profit-making machines. From 2011–2018, they all posted gains. A perfect 10 for 10.

And several produced big gains. Amazon leapt 870%. Microsoft (MSFT) surged 350%. Google (GOOG) climbed 270%.

But they are not the stocks you want to buy today.

Now you may ask, “OK, Stephen, so how do I find the next Amazon, Google, or Microsoft?”

Three Questions You Should Ask Before Buying Disruptor Stocks

Before I dig into cash flows, valuation, or financial statements, I ask three simple questions:

· Is this company doing something radically different from its competitors?

· Is it breaking the rules? Is it changing the game?

· Is it still small enough relative to the industry size it’s disrupting?

I can tell you 49 in 50 fail this test right out of the gate.

Believe it or not, many CEOs are happy with the status quo. They don’t push hard for their companies to innovate. They’re satisfied to sell the same old stuff in the same old ways, collect a paycheck, and go home at 5 pm.

I’m not interested in these stocks. It’s only a matter of time until they’re disrupted.

My Favorite Disruptor Stocks

I know, this concept may be counterintuitive and still confusing to some of you. So let me give you a couple of examples of disruptor stocks that I recently recommended to my readers.

The first is Alteryx (AYX). It’s a disruptor that’s changing the way companies use data. In short, it’s helping America’s largest companies leverage data to make more money. Alteryx has soared 88% since I wrote about it less than five months ago.

The second stock is The Trade Desk (TTD). It’s one of the first disruptor stocks I recommended publicly. The Trade Desk is changing the way companies buy online ads. Since I wrote about it, it’s soared 135%.

Here’s one more.

Back in December I recommended Xilinx (XLNX), a maker of 5G computer chips. Lots of companies are seizing the opportunity to make parts for 5G. But Xilinx is changing the game with special customizable chips that are ideal for the 5G buildout.

Xilinx has leapt to a 35% gain since I recommended it:

I don’t want to give you the impression these gems are easy to find. In fact, it takes a team of analysts as well as a lot of time and effort to dig them up.

But the profits are worth it.

#Amazon #netflix #google #xilinx

0 notes

scifiphan · 7 years

Text

92 Things About Me

tysm @sleepwalkerphan for tagging me in this! it’s 2am and I’m procrastinating the heck out of writing so this is perfect lmao.

also I’ll put most of the things below the cut so keep reading if ya wanna know 92 fun facts about me

edit: this took me almost an hour to do and towards the end, I basically confess my entire life so have fun reading that lmao. like i seriously have a realisation about how idk what i’m doing with my life hahahaha

THE LAST..

1. Drink : Water #stayhydrated 2. Phone call : mum 3. Text Message : a gif of phil being scared in bed (even my irl friends are trash) 4. Song You Listened To : currently listening to Taro - alt-J 5. Time You Cried : On sunday I cried over a renovation reality tv show (??? yeah idk either, bro) the apartments just looked so nice and the team I liked got kicked off the show.

HAVE YOU EVER..

6. Dated Someone Twice : nope 7. Been Cheated On : nope 8. Kissed Someone And Regretted It : YES (smh @ me) 9. Lost Someone Special : thankfully no 10. Been Depressed : i honestly don’t know. i think I have but am so freaking stubborn at admitting I have had depressive episodes in the past 11. Got Drunk And Thrown Up : YES OH MY GOODNESS I HAVE HAD SO MANY BAD TIMES. DON’T DRINK WINE AND THEN A MILKSHAKE AND THEN DANCE ON A BEACH. YOU WILL ONLY END UP THROWING UP IN A GARBAGE BIN OUTSIDE A KEBAB STORE (it wasn’t even after midnight, that’s the most embarrassing thing)

LIST 3 FAVOURITE COLOURS :

12. Green 13. Pink 14. Turquoise

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU..

15. Made New Friends : yes!! so many new and amazing friends 16. Fallen Out Of Love : nope. 17. Laughed Until You Cried : laughing until I cry is me every time 18. Found Out Someone Was Talking About You : yes (you would think that adults would stop teen behaviours lol) 19. Met Someone Who Changed You : yes, the last year included so much change. 20. Found Out Who Your True Friends Are : Yes. Just gonna put it out there: traveling for an extensive period of time overseas really shows who your true friends are and who are the snakes. 21. Kissed Someone On Your Facebook List : hahahaha yes (too mant rip) 22.How Many Of Your Facebook Friends Do You Know In Real Life : probably almost all of them (so like 550) only a few on there are my internet friends 23. Do You Have Any Pets : nope and I probs wont get another pet for a long long time 24. Do You Want To Change Your Name : NO!!!!!!! Teddii is a blessing although I would change my last name (it’s two surnames joined together and it makes life difficult because it’s so long) 25. What Did You Do For Your Last Birthday : went out for dinner at a mexican place, won a few dollars on the pokies and then went out clubbing (also i got a fine rip me) 26. What Time Did You Wake Up This Morning: 11am OOPS (i slept in and missed uni) 27. What Were You Doing At Midnight Last Night : probably making a gif 28. Name Something You Cannot Wait For : FINISHING UNI AND MOVING TO THE UK (hopefully to do my masters in global terrorism at the uni of london but if not i really wanna get a 1 year working visa and just do some hospitality work before I start a career) 29. When Was The Last Time You Saw Your Mother : like 4 hours ago when we were watching tv 30. What Is One Thing You Could Change About Your Life : I wish I had a UK passport, it would make life a lot easier for me if I had dual citizenship instead of a boring Australian passport 31. What Are You Listening To Right Now : alt-J, a live performance of Taro 32. Have You Ever Talked To A Person Named Tom : I know so many Tom’s it’s ridiculous 33. Something That Is Getting On Your Nerves : PEOPLE!!! WHO!! THINK!! THAT!! IF YOUR DEGREE!! ISN’T STEM!! THEN IT ISN’T!! HARD!!!! (i’m looking @ every friend who does a stem degree and always laughs at how my degree must be so easy because it doesn’t include math)

34. Most Visited Websites : tumblr, youtube, my uni’s website, facebook 35. Elementary : v great time, got bullied heaps but still had fun 36. High School : problematic fave. honestly my time at high school can fill a 500 page essay. being right next to a beach and river was actually gr8, the endless issues weren’t so good. 37. College/University : it has been a wild ride. I swapped degrees so I still have around 2 years left but uni has been my fave so far 38. Hair Colour : PINK!!!! (naturally ginger) 39. Long or Short Hair : long 40. Do You Have A Crush On Someone : nope (which is a shocker) 41. What Do You Like About Yourself : I like my individuality and independance 42. Piercings : 2x lobes, 1x helix, 1x nose. (i’m thinkng about getting my conch in a few weeks) 43. Blood Type : O+ 44. Nickname : ted, teddii bear, sideshow bob, cotton candy 45. Relationship Status : hella single 46. Zodiac Sign : Cancer (aka my birthday is soon hell yeah) 47. Pronouns : she/her. 48. Favourite Tv Show : STAR TREK: VOYAGER WILL ALWAYS BE MY FAVOURITE 49. Tattoos : crescent moon on my right wrist (i sorta don’t like how it turned out but after a year I have grown to appreciate the meaning) 50. Right Or Left Hand : Left handed (aka another reason why Dan is my spirit animal)

FIRST..

51. Surgery : i got a bunch of teeth removed when I was like 4/5 52. Word : baba or ma 53. Sport : soccer 54. Vacation : i actually can’t remember my first vacation. probs Sydney tbh idk I went a lot of places when I was young 55. Pair Of Trainers : probably something Adidas tbh

WHAT ARE YOU..

56. Eating : nothing 57. Drinking : water 58. Reading : nothing at the moment besides uni textbooks 59. I’m About To : I should say sleep but I’ll probably just watch youtube 60. Listening To : Breezeblocks by alt-J (can you see a recurring theme with my music questions?) 61. Waiting For : GoT SEASON 7 AKA MY BIRTHDAY (honestly feel so blessed to grow older and watch new GoT on the same day) 62. Craving For : MONEYYYYYYY. ya girl is unemployed thanks to the bad habit of planning last minute overseas holidays 63. Do you wanna get married : eventually but at the same time it doesn’t worry me 64. Going To Do When You Get Older : ????? ?????? ????? you would think I would have an idea but tbh idk. I’m studying International Relations and I want to do a postgrad in global terrorism. But career wise I have no bloody idea. I would like to work in the UN or UNESCO or for the Australian Government in an embassy. but at the same time I also want to be a travel photographer and just ignore my degree (idk adult life is hard)

YOUR TYPE..

65. Hugs or Kisses : HUGS 66. Lips or Eyes : eyes! <3333 67. Short or Tall : tall guys!!! but short girls are my weakness!! 68. Young or Old : HA haHA HA old 69. Nice Arms Or Nice Stomach : slight preference for nice arms because tummys are cute no matter what 70. Sensitive or Loud : I am both of those things so, por que no las dos? 71. Hook Up or Relationship : relationship (although I can’t relate because i am eternally single) 72. Troublemaker or Hesitant : I prefer when people are upfront instead of hiding stuff from me so I guess that means troublemaker?

HAVE YOU EVER..

73. Kissed A Stranger : yes 74. Drank Hard Liquor : yes (love me some vodka) 75. Lost Eye glasses or contact lenses : not yet thankfully 76. Turned Someone Down : YES! (there is nothing wrong with turning people down.) 77. Sex On First Date : no 78. Broken Someone’s Heart : yes and I still feel bad 79. Had Your Heart Broken : yep 80. Been Arrested : yes (kind of, long story) 81. Cried When Someone Died : yes. although I tend to go more numb instead of crying. idk it’s weird because I cry about everything but death kinda makes me become numb 82. Fallen For A Friend : yes (oops)

DO YOU BELIEVE IN..

83. In Yourself : yes although I need to believe in myself a lot more 84. Miracles : yes 85. Love At First Sight : yes and no. I believe it exists but I feel like a lot of people believe that they are experiencing love at first sight when in reality it is infatuation/lust. 86. Santa Claus : this question conflicts me because the logical side of me says no but the optimistic child side of me refuses to accept the truth 87. Kiss On The First Date : yeah 88. Angels : nah, not for me

OTHER..

89. Current best friend’s name : do i have a best friend? not really. again, it’s a weird time for me when it comes to friends. 90. Eye Colour : um blue with green and grey mixed in (it’s so hard to describe but yeah, those three) 91. Favourite singer/Band : Ed Sheeran, Mumford & Sons, al-J (i love them all a lot.) 92. Favourite Movie : Avatar. yes the blue alien one. It’s lame but I fell in love with the na’vi culture and it kinda helped get me obsessed with scifi.

And that’s a wrap!

If anyone actually read all that I hope you enjoyed my (very) late night confessions. Idk who to tag so if you see this and want to do it feel free to do so! Also, come hit up my inbox/messages if you wanna be my friend after reading this, I wanna make some friends on this hellsite

#tag game #92 questions #that took ages but it was fun #i hope you all know me a little bit better #aka i'm boring

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crazykendal · 7 years

Text

Bored, Single, and Dead

1. What was on your mind mostly today? MOVING ON from some people and why my right arm feels fucking wierd

2. If someone looked on your bed, what would they find? oh shit idkk

3. What’s on your schedule for tomorrow? im going to Tahoe

4. Are you nice to everyone? no

5. Is it possible to be single and happy? for me, no

6. Is it easy for people to make you cry? no but once someone made me cry when I heard them SING for the first time YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE

7. Did you sleep alone last night? I had a sleepover with my sister

8. Do you play with dead bugs? ew no wtf

9. Honestly, are you dating two people? im not even dating one person wth

10. Do you think things will change in the next 3 months? yeah, im going to be dead ass lonely or dead

11. Have you ever slept in the same bed with someone other than family? nooo

12. Do you want to see somebody right now? yeaahhhh

13. What if you had a baby with the person you like? that's not physically possibly

14. Are you happy? not right now nope

15. Have you ever tripped in public? trippin is my game

16. Is there anyone who doesn’t like you? I sometimes think everone secretly hates me

17. Have you ever sat in the back of a police car? nope

18. Are you stubborn? veRY

19. Do you tend to hold a grudge? yeah, and it can get baddd

20. What’s a fact about the last person that texted you? oh, well.. they're a scammer

21. Has anyone called you perfect before? nope

22. Where is the biggest scar on your body? my left ankle. I shaved a huge chunk of my skin off and it was baddddd haha

23. Have you ever been told you were amazing? no

24. Would you date someone who was addicted to drugs?

immediate no

25. Are you trying to avoid liking somebody at the moment? well guess what YES and its killlling me

26. Do you trust all your friends? no I cant trust any of them 27. If you could go back and change something in the past 5 months, would you? haha well yeah

28. What pissed you off today? my sister scratches up my arms and it looks like ive tried to cut myself or something

29. What was the last thing you cried about? this one person

30. Who was the last girl you talked to? ^^ same person as ^^

31. Do you know anyone who drinks a lot? no

32. Who sits next to you in English? SCHOOLS OUT BITCHES

33. Ever talked to someone who was drunk? no

34. Have you heard a song that reminds you of someone today? yes everything is about them and its driving me crazy

35. How late did you stay up last night and why? I stayed up til 12:30 reenacting Stranger Things scenes with gummy bears with my sister.

36. Do you know how to properly use grammar in a sentence? kinda? 37. Are your parents very protective of you? yeah

38. Will you be in a relationship in the next couple months? I fukin wish

39. How many drugs are in your system? can a Capri Sun count

40. The person who hurt you the most calls and needs you, do you go? bitch no

41. Is it easy to pretend everything’s okay for you? yeah, I do it every day

42. Are you afraid of losing the last person you talked to on the phone? uh that was my dad, so sure

43. Do you think you are a good person? oh god no, if hell existed i’d be going there

44. What do you want right this second? I WANT A FUCKING RELATIONSHIP WITH SOMEONE

45. Do you think it makes him weak if a guy cries? no

46. Have you ever cried cause you were so mad? yeah

47. Could you last in a relationship for over a year? yes

48. Who were you with on your birthday? i don't really remember or care 49. Have you ever crawled through a window? I feel like I have but don't remember

50. First person to talk to you in 2014? how the fuck am I supposed to remember that, it was 3 years ago

51. Do you miss your past? Not really but I dont regret meeting some sweet ass people

52. It’s 4 in the morning, your phone rings, who is it? a telemarketer, I have like no friends so no one ever checks up on me, by the time someone does I might be dead.

53. Do you have anything interesting planned for the next week? VIDCON I get to meet Sara Rubin, Ashly Perez, Allison Raskin, Gaby Dunn, Stephanie Frosch, and Bria and Crissy and maybe Simply Nailogical haha

54. Who was the last person to text you?

scammmmmmmmer

55. What were you doing 4 hours ago? i dont remember

56. Is there a certain song that you can’t stop listening to atm? Secrets by The Weeknd

57. Tell me 3 things that your friends don’t know about you. well well well I cant say

58. What is something that people often give to you as a gift? honestly nothing

59. Do you tend to hold on to a lot of stuff you don’t need, just because it has sentimental value? yeah then a month later I can get rid of it

60. What is something that reminds you of your ex?

well guess what i havent even dated at all so nop

61. Has the last person you kissed ever cried in your arms? my cat Bub has not cried in my arms

62. Which would you prefer to receive as a gift - flowers or chocolate? chocolate

63. When did you last take a shower/bath? Do you wash your hair every time? I took a shower like 2 hours ago, yeah I was my hair every time.

64. Would you prefer to be somewhere else right now? yep

65. Do any of your followers on Tumblr have your phone number? yeahh

66. Will you be going out tonight, or staying in? staying in listening to Alone by halsey because it’s relatable.

67. How many times have you been in love? ONCE and maybe I still am but I need to fix it BECAUSE SOMEONE ISNT GOING TO MY HIGH SCHOOL NEXT YEAR and im going to be so fcked and messed up so pray for me

68. If you were heartbroken, who would help you pick up the pieces? ususally myself of this one friend I have she’s cool and she bacically proved I was bi. No it’s not you olivia sorry dude

69. Apparently, it’s very common to crave chocolate around the ‘time of the month’; do you ever get that craving? no

70. How would you feel about dating someone who had a reputation for being a player in the past? Do you think that players will ALWAYS be players, or is it possible that they can change? I’d give them a chance but idk Ive nvr fcking dated at all so whaat

71. Did you sleep well last night? sure

72. Is your bedroom big enough for you? sure

72. Are you looking forward to seeing someone soon? imexited to see Sara Rubin on Friday because she actually screwed up my love life and I dont even want to get started with that because it’s actually funny but will make me cry.

73. Ever had a one-night stand? nope

74. Is anyone flirting with you? I wish

75. Have you ever felt pressure to do anything you didn’t want to, like smoking, drinking, or losing your virginity, before you were ready for it? If so, how did you deal with that? all the time, like when the teacher tells us to do homework like wth hahahahahahaahaha idk

76. Do you consider yourself to be an intelligent person? Why/why not? no im really stupid and can have absolutely no common sense its actually really funny

77. Who would you most like to be stuck in a lift with? Ashley Nicolette Frangipane

78. Is there anyone you’d HATE to be stuck in a lift with? oh my god yeah like the chick who plays Enid in the walking dead, and like my whole school.

79. When did you last talk to the person you love/like? What did you talk about? pff what lemme look... a hour and a half ago ahahahahahah

80. Have you ever seen your father cry? no

81. How would your parents react if you got pregnant? well i dont know because I dont really want kids

82. Do you/did you keep to your school��s uniform/dress code? sure

83. If the last person you kissed said you were the only one they wanted, would you believe them? Bub is a mean cat to my other cats and I wouldnt believe it

84. What was the highlight of your summer? cant rememeber

85. The last time you threw up, was it because you were hungover? idk

86. Have you ever seen the film ‘Wake Wood’? What did you think of it? never heard of it

87. Are you confused about anything atm? Is there anything bothering you? Or, is everything good? some people and their lies

88. If you say ‘I’ve had enough’ or ‘I’m done’, do you always mean it? no haha

89. Who was the last person that invited you to their house? honeslty scammer because I have no other friends

90. Have your parents ever told you about any alternative names they considered for you, or the name they would have chosen, if you’d turned out to be a boy? ASHLEY

91. Are you friends with any of your exes? n/a

92. Have you ever had to make an emergency phone call?

93. If you’re in a relationship, how is it going? If you’re single, are you looking for someone? *cries*

94. What language do you like the sound of? english ;)

95. Think about the last guy, outside of family, that you had a conversation with. Do you find him sexy? ew no wtf

96. What do you think is an assumption that someone could make about you, just by looking at your Tumblr? Would this assumption be correct? idk

97. What’s the most attractive physical feature of the person you love/like? HA I’d rather not write an essay right now

98. Do you consider yourself to be a strong person? Why/why not? .kindaaa?

99. Tell me about a special moment you’ve had with the person you love/like. just convos

100. What are you doing tomorrow? Im going to tahoe

#alone

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kelasparmak · 7 years

Text

euuhghghhh i keep realising more and more mistakes i made in my last piece of examined work, i think i might have fucked it up enough to actually fail that module. not just cause it was a shit essay (which it was) but i think i forgot to cite something that was a pretty important point, and if i did then that’s plagiarism which would probably mean i’d fail even if it was a good essay. and on this course failing any module means you get kicked out, even though by the time we get our results for it there’ll only be like a month left. and i can’t even go check cause i don’t have a copy.

i might get leniency bc i did really really well in the first piece of coursework and even better in the exams (like not to brag but i did really well, the grad rep told us all ‘don’t worry if your marks are in the 60s, it's just cause they’re out of 85, it sounds low but the highest mark i’ve ever heard of someone getting was a 75′ and i’m there with my 76, 79 and 80 like ‘...welp, ok’). and i did let my supervisor know that i’ve had really bad Depression Brain for the past few weeks (btw it is super fun to have to tell ur highly respected super intimidating supervisor who makes fun of everyone all the time ‘hey pls dont be mad that i keep fucking up, it’s just that i constantly want to die and i spend 50% of the time curled up in a ball crying, which limits my efficiency’).

but also i don’t think they can be very lenient or people would just say ‘yah but get this, i have depression’ every time they did badly on an assignment. and if your mental health is bad enough to make you fail a paper you’re supposed to just intermit but it’s too late to intermit now since it’s a one-year course that ends in two months.

it doesn’t really matter if i get kicked out i guess because i don’t actually need an mphil for anything, and i wasn’t gonna apply for a phd anyway, and i got funding from the uni so it’s not like i spent a load of money on it. so like, i wouldn’t mind it if i’d just decided to drop out on my own terms because of my mental health, but i don’t want to get kicked out because of it, especially over a piece of coursework that was supposed to be the easiest one of the entire year.

#personal #bluh bluh gabe's a baby #it's absolutely not the end of the world if i fail #it's not even a big deal long term #but also i will definitely feel like it's the end of the world #in fact i already do #being good at school is the one thing i have going for me! if i fail this i will never ever be capable of success again #anyway i don't really wanna talk about this but i needed to vent. so. there we are.#in other news it's very sunny today and that's nice

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yoursongpodcast · 7 years

Audio

For 'Tell Me About Your Song' #79, songwriter Marian Call talked about her song 'Oregon Trail', which is from her album 'Standing Stones'.

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Wikipedia has articles about the actual historical Oregon Trail, as well as the 1970s/1980s education game 'The Oregon Trail'. The idea of the 'Oregon Trail Generation' was described in a 2015 article named 'The Oregon Trail Generation: Life Before and After Mainstream Tech' by Anna Garvey in Social Media Week.

I also recommend an essay that Marian Call wrote about her song 'Standing Stones', which is the song that follows 'Oregon Trail' on the Standing Stones album.

In our discussion, I made reference to Marian Call's interview on 'Make Me Smart', which you can hear on the Marketplace website.

More information about Marian Call and her music can be found on her website, where you can also find out about any upcoming shows. You can get her music on Bandcamp, as well as most other places where music is sold. She is also on twitter, facebook, and Patreon.

The 'Tell Me About Your Song' icon was designed by Shaenon K. Garrity.

If you want more information about your host, Jacob Haller, then check out my web page, my facebook page, or my twitter account.

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Episode Transcript:

[BEGINNING OF 'OREGON TRAIL' PLAYS:]

And we set out in the springtime with our bindles and our boots, And we reveled in our poverty, abandoning our roots. A brand new path, adventurers, All lonely, bold, and brave, Breaking free and making do, And telling tales of how we'd save ourselves.

JACOB: Hello and welcome to Tell Me About Your Song, the podcast where I talk to musicians and songwriters about a song they've written. Today, I'm talking to Marian Call, and the song she'll be talking about is named 'Oregon Trail'. So, where would you like to start, Marian?

MARIAN: This is part of a record called 'Standing Stones,' and, in that record, one of the things I'm interested in looking at is the stories we tell ourselves. Like, the myths that we have about who we are, and the myths of, you know, Western culture, myths of America. And this is one of those myths, the Oregon Trail, right? It's about being stron,g and independent, and adventurous, and setting out on your own, and conquering the landscape, and finding a place for yourself -- You know, all the things that we -- All things we want to do, in sort of our individualist society. It's about self actualization, and about claiming a space in the world, and that myth is so important to us. But I've been thinking a lot about how it doesn't necessarily hold up, either to our experience, or to a good model. Like, it might seem exciting to think of being a pioneer, and going out, and, you know, finding your own way in the world, but the more you actually read about what it would have been like back then, about (a) how horrid it was; (b) about the myths that the pioneers were often being sold about "Free land out west!" when, of course, that land was already occupied, and about the idea that it was our destiny to command and control the landscape and to have, you know, a country from sea to sea. That was not a given; that was a something that we decided, and then we made it real. And that may or may not have been a decision that sat well with everyone who was affected by it. Part of why I wanted to write about this was that it is one of our founding mythologies, you know? It's a real historic event, but it's also a mythos that is larger than this one event, and that's why I wanted to tackle it, and both honor it, and dismantle it, at the same time. [laughs] You know, every now and then, those think pieces come along about generations, and what millennials are doing, and what Gen X is doing, and everything like that, and I was part of this cohort -- and a lot of my friends were, too -- that fell kind of between Generation X and Y and millennials --

JACOB: Mmm-hm.

MARIAN: -- and we never got a name, but I still feel like our experience is kind of fundamentally different, and we're too young to be Generation X, but definitely too old to have a similar experience to millennials, in a lot of ways. And I read several articles in which some scholars and demographers argue for the existence of a Generation Oregon Trail, which is kind of a small cohort. I think it's like 1976 to 1987, or something like that -- or 1986.

JACOB: Mmm-hm.

MARIAN: And that describes the generation of people who started school -- like, started, you know, their first few years of school -- without networked computing, but, by the time they completed school, the Internet was fully fledged and running. And so, like, kids after us grew up typing from the time they were, you know, very, very small. They don't remember before computers in the home, and before computers in school, to do all their tasks. In fact they stopped needing to even offer keyboarding classes in a lot of schools. They didn't teach typing anymore, because the kids would just arrive at school already knowing how to type.

JACOB: Mmm.

MARIAN: And that was not true for my group! We had to go through hours and hours of typing classes, Mavis Beacon and all the rest. So this song is about the peculiar life of that particular generation. I think this cohort of people is really cool, and inspiring, and interesting, and innovative, and has made a lot of cool things, but at the same time, there's a little a little bit of a sense of opportunity drying up, in a lot of ways, and I wanted to write something about that, and I thought the Oregon Trail was a perfect allegory for it. It describes the name of the generation because of that video game we all played, and it also describes a sort of a modern look back at that journey, that has been mythologized as one of the cornerstones of the American story, you know? Did you play Oregon Trail when you were young.

JACOB: Oh yes!

MARIAN: I did, too. Several different generations of it, too, from the, like, big floppy disk, to the little floppy disk, to the hard drive version, to the -- Apparently, someone told me there was an Oregon Trail 2, and, like, an Amazon Trail, and they kind of did a couple of spin offs and sequels, which surprised me. I hadn't heard of those, but --

JACOB: Yeah, I had no idea.

MARIAN: Yeah. Hundreds of people have gotten in touch with me, to tell me, like, how this hit a nostalgia spot for them. So, yeah. I'm kind of revising that history in this song. Like, it starts out really great. It's, you know, 'We set out adventurous --'

[BEGINNING OF 'OREGON TRAIL' PLAYS:]

MARIAN: And then we gradually realised that it wasn't just us. It was everyone else.

['OREGON TRAIL' CONTINUES:]

'Til everybody else we knew Had started on the journey too. Then we were not phenomenal, no, we were not phenomenal. We never were phenomenal, Just part of our whole generation's vague instinctive mass migration. We were not exceptional, no we were not exceptional. We never were exceptional. We were longing longing longing though, And true. We were dreaming that the world was dreaming too.

MARIAN: And maybe we were being brave and individual, and making our own choices, but maybe we were also just part of this kind of global phenomenon that we couldn't really control.

[AN INSTRUMENTAL PART OF 'OREGON TRAIL' CONTINUES BRIEFLY.]

MARIAN: The opening sense of possibility that we had, as young people, when the Internet was new, was very much hit by, you know, two different bubble bursts. First, the Silicon Valley, and kind of that portion of the economy -- realizing, no, the internet doesn't do everything, and it doesn't change everything. It does some things, but not all of them. And then the housing bubble burst -- that, no, we can't all own a home on the income that we have. No, we're never going to pay off our student loans. No, we're never going to get out of credit card debt.

JACOB: Mmm-hm.

MARIAN: No, we're never going to stop moving around the country. I think the number of times a person my age has changed cities is just, like, astounding now. it's really -- it's so different from the generation before. This is also part of a song cycle, and this is kind of in the middle beginning of it, so there's some resolution that answers this song a little bit later in the album. This is in the 'What are we doing?' stage at the late beginning on the record. I wanted it to start feeling like a very wholesome folk song, like -- I'm working on a folk festival this weekend, and I wanted it to sound just like a good old classic tune, you know? Maybe a little more complicated words, but the same chords, and the same feel, as, you know, a Willie Nelson kind of song.

JACOB: And the harmonies, too.

MARIAN: Yeah, the harmonies, exactly, are very straight at the beginning.

[EXCERPT FROM 'OREGON TRAIL' PLAYS:]

Surrendering exceptional to lighten up the load, We woke up ...

[SONG CONTINUES PLAYING IN THE BACKGROUND.]

MARIAN: But the deeper into the song you get, the more your perspective shifts, sort of. I think of it as, like, a moment when the sky opens, and suddenly you realize that the world is so much bigger than you thought.

['OREGON TRAIL CONTINUES:]

And the World Was all a road ...

MARIAN: And that occurs in the middle of the song, and we have this big, kind of -- We have a big, and sort of shocking, key change. It's not the way you would usually change keys from A to E by way of a C major chord, which is not in either key, but it's -- That's the pivot between those two worlds. And it's meant to feel this grand opening into a much larger universe.

[EXCERPT FROM 'OREGON TRAIL' PLAYS:]

We bought some land out west, Though nowhere seemed to feel like home. And digging in the yard we found somebody else's bones. The moment that the shovel hit, We bowed before the things we should have known.

MARIAN: Gradually, our speaker realizes that they thought they were going out into empty space to make a name for themselves, and, in fact, they were going out into someone else's space. And that doesn't feel very good.

[EXCERPT FROM 'OREGON TRAIL' PLAYS:]

Of course we're not the first ones here. We never were the first ones here. Just part of our whole generation's Childish frontier re-creation.

[SONG CONTINUES PLAYING IN THE BACKGROUND.]

MARIAN: But if you don't do that, then there's not enough food, there's not enough security. It's a little bit of a story of getting lost along the way growing up.

['OREGON TRAIL CONTINUES:]

... adventurers We were longing longing longing and so lost We were barely what we needed, and it cost.

MARIAN: And it reminds me of a lot of friends my age. I do have some friends my age who are married and have, you know, houses, and kids, and things. But, you know, coming on 40, it's not nearly as many of us as we thought, right? And a lot of us are not housed, or are moving around the country all the time, you know, not settling in one city, or we're not -- we're divorcing and remarrying, or not settling into a family structure, getting old enough to be like: "Well, I guess I'm not having kids, then," without it really being ever a voluntary choice. I think that's one of those surprises that hits you along the trail, and that's what this song is about. [laughs] After we transition to E, then I start adding chords that are more modern -- chords that were not in the original, sort of, lexicon of vintage country music.

[EXCERPT FROM 'OREGON TRAIL' PLAYS:]

... the first ones here. Just part of our whole generation's Childish frontier re-creation. We were not adventurers. No, we were not adventurers. We never were adventurers! We were longing longing longing ...

MARIAN: So I started adding, like, a flat seven chord, a D major chord, and I start adding minor IV chords, and it gets, basically, just messier and messier. It's like the chord progression sort of starts to disintegrate. And, at the end, the harmonies get weirder, and weirder, and weirder, and then the harmonies kind of fall apart, too. And the two backing voices kind of abandon the main voice, and wander off on their own, and get lost.

[EXCERPT FROM 'OREGON TRAIL' PLAYS:]

No, we have not found shelter yet. We've eaten what we meant to plant, And the twelve ages of man are circling hungry overhead -- And grandmother would disapprove. We will make no more miles today.

MARIAN: It's really -- it's fun. It's like the oxen have run away. [both laugh] Yeah.

JACOB: Yeah.

MARIAN: It's actually a reference to a videogame, too. There's a lot of videogames in this song, not just Oregon Trail. I got hooked on 'Don't Starve', which is a ridiculous -- [chuckles] It's just, it's a very silly videogame. It's a survival game --

JACOB: Uh-huh.

MARIAN: -- and I played way too much of it in the year that I was writing this record, and it informed a lot of my thinking about just, like, what it really does take to survive. When you eat the seeds that you were supposed to put in the ground, you know, you survive another day, but you've jeopardized your future, and that's very much, you know, me and my other, kind of like, late 30s friends, having to spend our savings, or still being in debt, without any sort of assets. And it's not meant to be too hopeless, but it is meant to be, like, a moment of clarity, that I set out on this journey, and realizing we're not as far as we thought we were, and we haven't found anywhere to stop and plant.

JACOB: And it says, "The 12 ages of man are circling hungry overhead."

MARIAN: Uh-huh. And I have 11 songs that are divided by those 12 ages of man.

JACOB: Ah.

MARIAN: Yeah. I really worked on the structure of this one, because I like the idea of -- The 12 Ages of Man is sort of a late medieval pre-Renaissance Western European idea that, if a person lived all 12 ages of man, they could get to be 72. So there were 12 ages, and they were six years each, and they corresponded to, like, the months of the year, and they corresponded to the seasons, and to the horoscope, and to a map of the body, and everything. They sort of connected all these things that weren't necessarily connected. But I liked that idea, and so I have these 11 songs that are about different stages of life, and this one is very much the, like, getting out of college, and then realizing that it's not as easy as you thought, you know? [laughs]

JACOB: Mmm-hm.

MARIAN: Late 20s/early 30s. You've accomplished so much, and you've been set on this grand trajectory, and then you get out there in the world, and you're like, "Oh! Hang on!" it's kind of a letdown. But there's more to come in the story.

JACOB: You were talking about this in terms of it being part of a song cycle, so: What comes before this, and what comes after it?

MARIAN: What comes before this, is a song about about childhood, about being young, exuberant, and feeling like you can fill up your whole world, or like the world cannot contain you. It's a song called 'No Paper'. The original working title was 'Lauds', which is the name of the prayer for that hour of the day, that corresponds to the Twelve Ages of Man, that corresponds to all this big structure that I was kind of plugging into, from early, like, Renaissance literature. [laughs] You can leave that out, if you want.

[EXCERPT FROM 'NO PAPER' PLAYS:]

There is no paper big enough for what I'm going to draw today.

MARIAN: It's a crazy rhythm jam, actually, with very little melody, but it has, like, a horn section, and some really wild harmonies, and just insane electric guitar. It's a very, like, expressive, creative, kind of Jackson Pollock-y song, about being young, and feeling full of possibility. It's also about protests, and protest sign,s and marching. The line is "There is no paper big enough for what I'm going to draw today." And it's just -- There's nothing that can contain me, or that can contain my message, and, you know, that feels very youthful to me. Both about, like, little kids, before they learn that -- Before they learn that art is supposed to look a certain way, and they're just like scribbling filling up the whole page, and, like, just the energy that people have, like, in college, when they're learning everything, and excited, and have a lot of passion, and so: Yeah. It's kind of a younger age.

[EXCERPT FROM 'OREGON TRAIL' PLAYS:]

We never were adventurers. We were longing longing longing and so lost.

MARIAN: And then, we transition to this song, which is a little bit, like, "Well, we thought we were going to go out into the world and conquer it, and then we had another think, after we got out there."

JACOB: Mm hmm.

MARIAN: And the song after it is the title track. It's called 'Standing Stones.'

[BEGINNING OF 'STANDING STONES' PLAYS:]

We drew nine lines from east to west We drew nine from north to south And we stitched our names in concrete veins Through miles and miles and miles of ground

MARIAN: It sort of reconciles that. It's about how our impulse to build things, and make things, and design, and scratch, and leave our mark, and change the environment -- how that impulse is really universal -- we all have it -- and also how it's impermanent. Like, it's going to pass away, but that doesn't matter, because it's just what we do, and that's beautiful. It's really, it's a validation of humanity, in the middle of acknowledging that we have a finite span, so, yep! And then it goes on, kind of more into, like, middle age, and then midlife crisis, of course, and then into a kind of acceptance. Some of the other songs on this record are much, much less complex. This one's through composed. Like, the chords don't necessarily repeat, and the lyrics don't repeat very much. But, yeah, it does reward repeat listening. It's definitely a journey. And hopefully catchy, too. Like, people will be leaving humming it, even though they can't remember any other words because they don't repeat!

JACOB: Have you played this song out?

MARIAN: Yeah, we play it out, and it's hard to communicate that groove change --

JACOB: Mmm.

MARIAN: -- So I just kind of have to do without it. But that's part of why I was so excited to put it on a record, too, and have it sound different on the record. I like doing it out. I wish -- I would love -- I would just die to do it with a trio --

JACOB: Mmm-hm.

MARIAN: -- you know, so we could sing all the harmonies. But that's, again, the joy of getting to record it! There's a video for it, that I really am proud of. Pat Race made an Oregon Trail style video of it, and, as it happened, somehow someone pinged the son of the man who created Oregon Trail -- one of the two men who created Oregon Trail. And he emailed me, and then his dad e-mailed me! So I got a message from the creator of Oregon Trail, which was great! [laughs]

JACOB: Wow, that's awesome! What did they say?

MARIAN: They really liked it! That was -- that made me happy! I was shocked and surprised. His name is Don Rawitsch, and he got in touch just to say that he was honored by the tribute, and that he thought it was interesting. Says, "Thanks for the tribute to the pioneers, and the game I co-invented 45 years ago."

JACOB: Wow.

MARIAN: And I can't believe it was 45 years ago, because I experienced it more like 33 years ago.

JACOB: Mmm-hm.

MARIAN: But yeah. [laughs]

JACOB: Yeah, that video is great. I watched -- Like, I started watching it, and then I kind of had it on in the background, and I thought it was just the actual game, and then I went back and looked at it, and I was, like, "Wait a minute!" One of the things is a cellphone charger, and --

MARIAN: Yep, yep, yep, there's --

JACOB: -- and you come across this pile of skulls, I think, right around where the modulation occurs.

MARIAN: Yeah. It takes some twists. We were hoping, actually, that, at the beginning, people would think it was just kind of a GIF that repeats, you know, and doesn't really go anywhere.

JACOB: Mmm-hm.

MARIAN: But, gradually, it kind of gets wilder, and wilder, and takes you out of our safe little sweet country song beginning.

JACOB: I think that this idea is one that I stole from Kai Ryssdal, because I listened to your interview -- or, I didn't know if it was an interview, per se -- but when you were on "Make Me Smart" --

MARIAN: That was fun. [chuckles]

JACOB: -- but he kind of asked you about, you know, being in Alaska, and kind of engaging in this sort of pioneering spirit that's involved in living up there.

MARIAN: Well, I think the connection is very much that, if ever there were a place where that American mythos is embodied, it's Alaska, for sure. There's there's some very bold, strong, self-reliant, competent people up here, you know? You can love them or hate them, but people kind of assume that you can split your own wood, and maybe fly a plane, and it's weirdly, like, one of the most and least sexist places I've ever been.

JACOB: Mmm-hm.

MARIAN: The most, because we have really difficult rates of abuse, and things like that, here, because there's a lot of substance issues. But it's also the least, in that people -- People here very much assume that I run my own business. They don't think I'm arm candy when I go to a party, right?

JACOB: Mmm-hm.

MARIAN: We've had women politicians at a higher rate than a lot of other states. We have tons of women business owners. And if you're out at a cabin, people won't flinch when they give you a tough job. They won't be surprised if you pick up something heavy to carry it, you know? It's just very -- It's nice! I like it! I like the presumption of my competence, even if I'm not always competent. [both laugh] But the funny thing is, up here in the land of the most independent people anywhere, is where I find that people are very, very clear on the fact that we're not independent. None of us are independent. We all rely on each other, and we're all connected in really concrete ways, like, you know, so and so does this job, and so and so does that job, and, in a tiny town, they're the only people who do it. We need them, and we rely on them, so we have to take care of them. I know people who have literally gone out into the woods, to their own property, to clear logs, use those logs to turn them into a cabin, live in that cabin in the summertime, you know, and have just cut every board themselves, right? But those people are the ones who are the most aware that if they, you know, if they slip up and hurt themselves, and they don't have a friend, then they're screwed. You know, if they don't have help -- if they don't have everyone else to come over and assist at the crucial moment -- then their house is not going to get put up. You can't do it yourself, in this -- The kind of twofold lesson here is, you can be as independent as you want, but you can't do it yourself, and especially when nature is really a factor, the way it is here. And I really like that. So that's what -- that's kind of what this whole record is about, is, you can you can be as independent and strong as you like, but we still need each other. Alaska has had a huge influence on this record. [laughs] It's like embracing it, and at the same time unmasking, the pioneering spirit, as being a lot more complicated, and a lot less pure, and not at all what we dreamed it was.

JACOB: Mmm-hm.

MARIAN: It doesn't look how we thought, in the movies. [chuckles] In the video game.

JACOB: Right. So, if people would like to hear more of your music, what should they do?

MARIAN: You can hear more of my music -- I have ten albums now, and then a few singles -- at bandcamp.com/mariancall. So just look me up on bandcamp, you can find me on YouTube, you can find me on Twitter, you can find me at a Facebook page, and you can find me on Patreon, now. That's new. The new album is just on Bandcamp, as of right now. It should be up in a lot of other locations very shortly. You know iTunes, and Spotify, and all that.

JACOB: Great. And I'll put links to all of that. I put together a blog post --

MARIAN: Oh, excellent. Thank you!

JACOB: -- for each episode, so I'll put links to that, and that blog is at yoursongpodcast.tumblr.com [spells it]. So my name is Jacob Haller, and I have a website at JacobHaller.com. You can find all my music there, or on bandcamp, and links to my other podcasts and projects, and, as I mentioned, there's a Tumblr blog for the show notes at yoursongpodcast.tumblr.com. And there's also a Web site for the podcast at tellmeaboutyoursong.com. You can write interview us on iTunes, or Stitcher, or any of those places, and I would love it if you did that -- or just tell a friend. If you think they would enjoy this episode, send them a link. So, with all that said, we're going to go out and listen to the song we've been talking about: 'Oregon Trail' by Marion Call, from her album 'Standing Stones'. Thanks for listening.

['OREGON TRAIL' PLAYS IN FULL. YOU CAN FIND THE FULL LYRICS ON MARIAN CALL'S BANDCAMP PAGE.]

JACOB: So where would you like to start, Marion?

MARIAN: [laughs] Um...

JACOB: See? I warned you, and it still is totally --

MARIAN: Oh, you -- you were serious about that! Yeah.

#Marian Call #The Oregon Trail #Oregon Trail #Alaska #jwgh #Tell Me About Your Song #TMAYS #songwriting #interview #podcast #music

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DGB Grab Bag: Look Out, Mitch Marner, Easter Bunny Larocque, and Everyone Re-Lax

Three Stars of Comedy

The third star: Artemi Panarin. I don’t fully understand what’s going on here, but I’m pretty sure he’s making fun of the Edmonton Oilers so I’m in.

The second star: Brody Marleau. That would be Patrick Marleau’s nine-year-old son. He got to spend his birthday with the Maple Leafs, which was adorable. He’s also apparently working on stealing Mitch Marner’s girlfriend, which is somehow more adorable.

The first star: Guy Boucher’s face. Fun fact: He’s not even reacting to anything in particular here, he’s just been making this face constantly since mid-November.

Outrage of the Week

The issue: Washington’s Evgeny Kuznetsov tried to score with the behind-the-net lacrosse move this week.

A few nights later, Filip Forsberg tried it, too.

The outrage: That move is disrespectful and anyone who tries it should eat an elbow for their troubles.

Is it justified: OK, I’m overselling the outrage here a bit—it’s not like anybody went nuclear on Kuznetsov or Forsberg. But that’s mainly because their moves didn’t work. If either guy had scored, you can bet that plenty of old-school hockey types would have pulled out their soapboxes and pontificated about hot-shot glory boys disrespecting the game and showing up the other side.

And here’s the thing: It’s going to happen. It’s kind of amazing that it hasn’t happened already.

The move has been around for a while; most of us saw it for the first time when Mike Legg scored with it in college back in 1996. But as best we can remember, nobody’s ever scored with it in a meaningful NHL game. Kuznetsov may even have been the first player to try it all. That’s kind of weird, because it’s not like today’s players can’t do it. Many of them weren’t even born yet when Legg pulled it off, and they’ve grown up trying it; Sidney Crosby did it all the way back in junior. Every NHL team has a few guys who can pull the move off reasonably well in practice. Heck, your beer-league team probably has a few guys who claim they can.

But nobody ever does, at least not in the NHL, because it’s one of those things you’re just not supposed to do. When Crosby did it in 2003, he was ripped by Don Cherry and others for showboating, and he hasn’t broken it out since. Plenty of fans still feel like there’s something wrong with the move.

If you’re one of those fans, I’ve got bad news for you: We’re probably a few years away from players doing this all the time. It’s going to be like the between-the-legs shot that nobody ever tried until the 90s. At first, you couldn’t believe what you’d just seen. Within a few years, Marek Malik was doing it in the shootout, and now it’s just a standard play that everyone tries.

The same thing is going to happen with the lacrosse move. (My personal prediction: One of the many guys who can already do it is going to wait for playoff overtime to break it out for real.) When it does, the old school will complain the first few times, but then we’ll get used to it, and the next generation of fans will wonder why there was ever a time when players weren’t supposed to score with moves they knew would work.

If that bothers you, get your complaining in now. In five years, we’ll look back and wonder what the problem was.

Obscure Former Player of the Week

Happy Easter weekend. Today’s obscure player is Bunny Larocque.

Larocque, who’s given name was Michel, was a junior star with the Ottawa 67s in the late 60s and early 70s. He was drafted with the sixth overall pick by the Canadiens in 1972—yes, yet another case of the team using a high pick on a goalie they didn’t really need. Unlike poor Ray Martynuik, Larocque at least got to play in Montreal, where he served as Ken Dryden’s backup during the late-70s Habs dynasty and took over as the part-time starter after Dryden retired. He even won the Vezina four times. Granted, that was back when it was awarded automatically to the goalies on the team with the fewest goals against, like the Jennings is today, but saying “four-time Vezina winner” sounds impressive so we’ll go with that.

His run in Montreal came to an end in 1981, when he was traded to Toronto. The Leafs were terrible, but it gave Larocque a chance to finally be the full-time starter, playing a career-high 50 games in 1981-82. He was traded to the Flyers in 1983 and later had a short stint with the Blues. In all, his NHL career lasted 11 seasons and 312 starts. He began a front-office career in junior hockey, but died in 1992 at the age of 40 after a battle with brain cancer.

Although all those Stanley Cups and Vezinas in Montreal were nice, it goes without saying that his true career highlight came as a Maple Leaf. On January 16, 1982, he got to face down Wayne Gretzky on a penalty shot.

Larocque stood on his head that whole night, and the Leafs won 7-1. Meanwhile, the great 1976-79 Habs “dynasty” never beat the Oilers, not even once. You tell me which team was better.

Be It Resolved

Be it resolved that it’s OK to just say the Golden Knights are the best expansion team ever, in any sport.

Really. It’s fine. Honestly, it’s probably not even up for debate. It’s also a great story, one the NHL should be singing it from the rooftops.

And to their credit, the league is trying. But it has run into a problem: The whole concept of an “expansion” team turns out to be a lot murkier than you might think, and that makes comparing the Knights to what’s come before tricky. Sure, teams like the 1998-99 Predators and the 1974-75 Capitals were expansion teams. But what about the 1979 WHA merger? Or the new teams that showed up in the 1920s and 30s? Do the 1991 Sharks even count, since they got to start with half the North Stars roster?

And so the league has had to go through contortions in order to recognize the Golden Knights without leaving anybody out. For a while they kept using the phrase “inaugural season.” More recently, it’s just “first NHL season.”

That clears up the semantics, but it doesn’t really do the Knights justice. It also leads to weird stuff like that tweet having to include teams from the league’s very first season, which hardly makes sense.

And if you try to expand the argument to other pro sports, it goes even more off the rails:

You can see what they’re trying to do, but I’m pretty sure I wrote essays in college that were shorter than that tweet. And let’s be honest, the NBA can say whatever it wants, but the 2002-03 Hornets aren’t an expansion team. Nor are teams that join from other leagues, or that show up in 1923 because some railroad tycoon got together six friends and $100 in cash and was granted an NHL team to play out of his backyard.

The Golden Knights are an expansion team. And they’re the best one ever, in any major sport. It’s fine to just say that.

Classic YouTube Clip Breakdown

Sunday is April Fool’s day. The hockey world isn’t much for pranks these days, beyond the beaten-into-the-ground “make the rookie call-up skate a lap by himself” joke and the occasional trying-a-bit-too-hard social-media bit. There was a time when hockey folks were allowed to have a sense of humor, though. We saw it last year when we unearthed an old Buffalo Sabres clip. This year, let’s hear from Dave Taylor and the Los Angeles Kings.

We start off with MSG throwing it to a clip from LA. Our host is longtime Kings play-by-play man Nick Nickson, and he’s sitting with veteran winger Taylor. They’re reminiscing about the very first interview they ever did together, way back in 1977, and Nickson has the clip. This should be fun!

Hey, wait a minute…

Yes, our trip back to 1977 has been accomplished via some special effects, a terrible fake mustache, and a fantastic mullet wig. It’s actually a pretty decent setup, and I’d be willing to bet that at least a few viewers took a minute to catch on to what was happening.

In his first answer, Taylor suggests that the Kings should someday switch over the black-and-silver uniforms like the Raiders. Get it? He’s predicting what happens in the future. I hope you enjoyed that joke, because it’s basically the only one they have for the next four minutes.

They also trip over which city the Raiders are supposed to be playing in, but they just keep rolling. The bit is good, but not “worth trying more than one take” good.

Taylor’s next answer “predicts” that he should play on a line with Marcel Dionne and Charlie Simmer. That would of course be the Triple Crown Line, which turned out to be one of the best of the 1980s. It was also one of the last great lines to get a decent nickname, instead of today’s lazy treatment of taking the first letter of each guy’s name and being done with it. We’re lucky this line didn’t come along today—I’m not sure I could have handled cheering on the STD Line.

Taylor’s next prediction is that the Islanders will be good, at which point Nickson jumps in to wonder if they’ll make an important trade someday. That’s a reference to the infamous Butch Goring deadline deal with the Kings, but to Nickson and Taylor’s credit they don’t come right out and hit you over the head with the punchline. Mainly because they’re saving that for the next question.

Yes, we arrive at the inevitable Wayne Gretzky bit. You knew it was coming. Taylor manages to predict all of Gretzky’s scoring records, at which point Nickson wonders what would happen if Gretzky ever wound up in a big market like Los Angeles. Taylor responds, “We probably still wouldn’t win anything and then end up trading him for Roman Vopat,” but I think that part accidentally got cut.

We mercifully make it to the last question. Nickson wants to know what players do in their spare time. Taylor answers that he likes reading comic books, and as luck would have it happens to be holding one in his hand right then. It’s a Batman comic, and Taylor predicts that someday it could make for a good movie, which is funny because… You know what, I think you get the idea.

I think we can agree that this whole bit isn’t exactly the most subtle premise, but there is a neat moment at the very beginning that’s easy to miss. Go back to Taylor’s first answer at the one-minute mark, and note how he stutters through the first few words. As a real rookie back in 1977, Taylor had a speech impediment, and often avoided doing interviews. He worked on it over the years to the point where it was rarely noticeable, but he sure seems to slip in an intentional reference to it here. I thought that was cool.

We close with Nickson pointing out the few things “rookie” Taylor failed to predict, and Taylor responding that he wasn’t asked about those. They then pull off the “fake laugh and look at the camera” moment that ended each episode of every 1980s sitcom, and we’re done.

In case you’re wondering, this YouTube clip doesn’t mention the date that it originally aired, but I think we can piece it together. We know it was during Taylor’s career but after the Gretzky trade, that it was a game against the Rangers in New York, and that the two teams were tied 1-1 after one period. That leaves two possibilities, one from 1993 and the other from 1990. I think we can safely go with the latter, since the Batman movie came out in 1989. So that means this aired on March 12, 1990, which isn’t quite April Fools territory but is close enough. Don’t say you never get any investigative journalism out of this column.

By the way, Taylor ended up scoring a goal in a Kings’ win that night. Who could have predicted that?

Have a question, suggestion, old YouTube clip, or anything else you’d like to see included in this column? Email Sean at [email protected].

DGB Grab Bag: Look Out, Mitch Marner, Easter Bunny Larocque, and Everyone Re-Lax syndicated from https://australiahoverboards.wordpress.com

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emtown · 7 years

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1. What have you eaten today? Two bites of matcha green tea ice cream, kettle popcorn, pizza. 2. Who was your last kiss with? Was it pleasant? ... 3. What color shoes did you last wear? White and silver. 4. Who has made you laugh the hardest in the last week? Andrew, my older brother. 5. What is your favorite scent? Paddywax apothecary candle in amber & smoke. Like Washington in a candle. 6. What is your favorite season? Why? Fall, for its colors, and colder (but not in Texass) mornings. 7. Can you do a handstand or cartwheel? Ha no. 8. What color are your nails? Normal nail color? 9. If you had to get a tattoo on your face to save your life, what would it be? I guess a lyric from George Ezra. 10. What is something you find romantic? Talking to someone and realizing what they want is also what you want. Like I was talking to someone who said they liked to cuddle and I was like !!! 11. Are you happy? No. 12. Is there anything in particular making you happy or sad? Happy to be leaving this fucking state in two weeks. Sad knowing there's a future where I won't see my friends anymore. 13. Dogs or Cats? Dogs. 15. Which do you prefer:a museum, a night club, the forest or a library? Forest for pictures, museum for inspiration, library to write, a night club to feel uncomfy. 15. What is your style? Jeans and a shirt. Once I'm skinny I'll have a more defined style. 16. If you could be doing anything you like right now, what would it be? In Seattle. Always. 17. Are you in a relationship or single? Single. 18. What makes you attracted to the person you like right now? Smile. 19. If you could replace your partner/best friend with a celebrity of your choice, would you? Who with? George Ezra, what a beautiful man. 20. Are you holding on to something you need to let go of? If so then what? Yeah. I wrote an essay about it thinking I'd get over it but lol nope. 21. How did you celebrate last Halloween? I worked. 22. Have you recently made any big decisions? Accepting that I'm going to grad school in Texass. 23. Were you ever in a school play? A bunch of them. We did High School Musical in sixth grade. I was a walkabye. I wanted to be Gabriella soooo bad. 24. What movie would you use to describe your life? Perks of Being a Wallflower is a close identifier. 25. Is there something you have dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it? Move to Seattle. Not enough money or a job lined up. No security. 26. Complete this sentence, “I wish I had someone with whom I could share…” a sunset with. 27. What are two things that irritate you about the same sex? Some girls try way too hard to be cool. Shrill. 28. What are two things that irritate you about the opposite sex? THEY CAN'T READ MY DAMN MIND. 29. What is the best thing that has happened to you this week? Talking to four people at once while driving back home. It makes me feel popular. 30. What is something that makes you sad when you think about it? That I'm not in Seattle when other people are living the life I want. 31. How long was your longest relationship? Let's replace this with friendship: 12 years. 32. Have you ever been in love? A false love, yes. 33. Are you currently in love? No. 34. Why did your last relationship end? Replaced with friendship: I manipulated her. 35. What jewelry are you wearing right now, and where did you get it? None. 36. When was the last time you cried and why? Maybe a few days ago and I was dissociating. 37. Name someone pretty. Anna! 38. What did you receive last Valentines Day? Nothing haha. 39. Do you get jealous easily? Yeah. But I know when to not be jealous. 40. Favorite song currently? Faded Fluorescence by Lights and Motion. 41. Do you trust your partner/best friend? Yeah. 42. Ever had detention? Once I got sent to AC for being out of dress code but I didn't go because I didn't know where it was. 43. Would you rather live in the countryside or the city? City. 44. What do people call you? Emily. Or Em Jem, as Aaron says. 45. What was the last book you read? Started Infinite Jest. 46. How big of a nerd/dork are you? Not much. 47. What kind of music do you listen to? Inspirational sappy shit. 48. How tall are you? 5'2. 49. Do you like kids? Not really. 50. Favorite fruits? Strawberries, pineapples, bananas. 51. Do you wear jeans or sweats more? I would love to just wear sweats all the time and look like an aesthetic, but I'm a blob right now. 52. What’s your earliest memory? I go back to this one a lot: swinging on the playground in my hometown, my brother one over, and the summer breeze hits my face and I watched other kids run around the place. 53. Ever had a poem or song written about you or to you? I wrote a poem and someone composed music to the lyrics, if that counts. But no one has written a thing specifically to me, and I'd like that. 54. Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it? Behind it. I have a vision that no one can recreate when they shoot me. 55. Do you have a collection of anything? David Gray cds, nonfiction books. 56. Do you save money or spend it? I like to save but I'm not afraid to spend it. 57. What would your dream house be like? Balcony, no basement. Alcove in the middle flight of stairs. Open kitchen. Sun room. Evergreens in the backyard. Porch. Big windows. 58. What top 5 things make you the angriest? Idiot customers, show offs, people who emphasize "crap" and "fuck," people who misperceive me when I didn't hear them correctly, lazy readers/writers in workshops. 59. What top 5 things always brings a smile to your face? Seeing Chyrell at work, crow's feet by the eyes, funny Tumblr posts, the sunset, receiving the news that a piece got accepted to a journal. 60. You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do? It's a doggo. I'd save it. 61. You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid? Move to Seattle. Tell everyone. Take a ferry every day. Visit my favorite places. I'd be scared but at peace knowing when it'd happen. 62. Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word; heart. Broken but in the process of being repaired. 63. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go? Seattle; Iceland; London; Australia. 64. Do you like the beach? Yeah, but only for sunrise/set. 65. Ever sleep on the couch or a bed with someone special? No, but wouldn't it be nice!! 66. Do you have a middle name? If so what is it! Sarah. Such a white name. 67. Do you talk to yourself? When I drive and someone pisses me off. 68. Describe your hair. Long and brown and in need of a cut or re color. 69. What is the meaning of life. BOI. Don't ask me this. 70. What is your ideal partner like? Charming. Laughs a lot. Makes me feel comfortable. Makes me feel validated. 71. Do you want to get ice cream right now? Ooh yeah. 72. When was the last time you redecorated your room? At home it's been a while. Since tenth grade maybe. 73. Like or dislike your family? I only like maybe five people in my family, and the rest can go elsewhere. 74. Are you Chunky or Slim? Chunky of course. 75. Would you consider yourself smart? In some areas yeah. But otherwise I'm pretty dumb. 76. What would you change about your life? I wouldn't live in Texass. 77. Religious or Not? Not really. 78. You’re drunk and yelling at hot guys/girls out of your car window, you’re with? What is this question asking 79. You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, is that a problem? It could be if we replace that with a person I dreamed about. 80. Does anyone regularly (other than family) tell you they love you? No. 81. If the person you wish to be with were with you, what would you be doing right now? At Denny's and playing this question game. 82. So, the last person you kissed just happens to arrive at your door at 3AM; do you let them in? Again, it'd be weird. 83. Do you like when people play with your hair? Yeah. 84. Do you like bubble baths? No. 85. Have you ever been pulled over by a cop? Yeah. Speeding ticket. 86. Have you ever danced in the rain? No, but please do that with me. 87. Do you trust anyone with your life? Used to. And actually, yeah, one of my professors know way more about me than even my parents do. He knows how my mind works. 88. What was your first thought when you woke up this morning? Chapstick. 89. If money wasn’t an issue, what top 10 places would you travel to? (You get to stay at each place for a week) Maybe like three places in Canada, Iceland, London, Amsterdam, New Zealand, a tropical place like St. Bart's, Seattle, New York City. 90. How was your day today? Eh. Lazy. Submitted to a bunch of places. 91. Play an instrument? No. 92. Describe what you think of the ocean. Terrifying. 93. Do you believe in aliens or ghosts? Ghosts. 94. Honestly, are things how you wanted them to be? Not at all. 95. Do you have a mean bitchy scary side? Yeah. It rarely reveals itself. 96. When are you vulnerable? In my essays. Some Facebook posts. 97. How much free time do you have? A lot now. 98. Do you like to go hiking? Yeah, maybe. 99. Odd or Even Numbers? My favorite number is 5. 100. Would you ever go sky diving, bungee jumping , cliff diving, wing suit gliding, parasailing, snorkeling, or other extreme activities? I tried to snorkel and I had a panic attack in the water. But I would try it again! More sunscreen next time.

#personal

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