#my friend who joined the vc earlier than i said that someone made a 'did you assume my gender' joke and in return whoever

[areislol]

genshin characters (diluc, zhongli, childe, albedo, scaramouche, or any of your choice) having a crush on reader they only met online. they're very far from each other, like an ldr but just talking stage. how do you think would they act or make an effort to talk with the reader or maybe go to them🧐

streamer! diluc, zhongli, xiao, dainsleif, albedo, scaramouche x online friend! reader

ft — diluc, zhongli, xiao, dainsleif, albedo, scara warnings — very, very long.. a/n — helloooo, i hope you have a great day or night, or evening.. other than that i love this idea and im so sorry that i couldn't do this one earlier :( i have many requests to do and if you're someone who requested something and haven't gotten anything please just know that i do see each and every one of your guys requests and please be patient!! fun fact: i was nervous to even post this cuz 1, this was way too long and 2, i was scared if it flops as i spent weeks on this and you know.. but i finally gave in by using my bestie(wheelspinner) and it said to “yes, post it” so here it is..

recommend listening to: sickick - mind games

streamer! diluc x online friend! reader

ok first of all, how did you catch diluc's eye?? like?? how.

anyways.. you and diluc met on discord, it was before diluc was well known - when he had around 3,000 followers.

diluc met you on a server and you both became friends really quickly, despite diluc being known to be "cold" and "reserved" diluc was always open and it was like a shy and scared cat opening up to its owner

ever since the day diluc and you talked, diluc found himself always giving you "good morning" and "good night" messages, he also finds himself always checking if you're online or not so he could text you and spark up a conversation.

you and diluc also gave each other your socials so you could talk to each other not just on discord(insta, twitch, etc.)

when diluc gave you his twitch, you immediately checked his account right away and you saw how many followers he had and you was amazed!!

you and diluc knew each other really well and because of diluc's schedule you could only talk to him on certain days on a certain time.

whenever diluc was streaming you would always be in the stream hanging out with diluc and interacting with him, diluc also put you as his mod <3 if you wanted to(which you did) you and diluc would be in vc playing games together on stream.

he also made a server for everyone who enjoyed his content(viewers and fans too) to join, he made a role only for you. and only for you - "the best" or any cute nickname.

(he may or may not have given you co owner or owner)

day by day diluc's channel started to grow to where he almost had 10,000+ followers, to almost 1 mill.

you made sure to screenshot whenever diluc hit his goal, so one day you could show everyone how diluc started small to big so that whoever wants to be a streamer, all these screenshots are proof that everyone starts small at some point and then gradually grows big <3

but the problem is, the more diluc's channel grew, the most busier he got and that means that you both dont really have time to talk to each other and that pains both of you.

whenever diluc has time off or just have time to squeeze in any "y/n time" he makes sure to make the most of it.

you're one of diluc's greatest supporters, you've been there with him from when he had 3,000+ followers to now, and he really appreciates it - and especially since you're his crush he values you and adores you 100x more

moving on, in diluc's server you're given either your own special role that comes with all perms, owner role or co owner role.

he allows you to do ANYTHING, anything you want. he trusts you that much and he knows that you won't do anything stupid.

he has his own vc just for the two of you, it's called "me n them <3", you must be blind if you can't even see these hints or maybe you do know but is just waiting for the right time..

ANYWAYS.

he even makes a whole category dedicated to you, for example: "y/n fanart | give y/n love | appreciation | y/n supremacy | y/n talk"

and many more, he also makes sure that nobody makes you feel uncomfortable - if anyone is talking about you in an inappropriate way hell immediately mute them and if the situation is much more worse he'll ban them and makes sure to tell everyone to report them.

you and diluc have both been thinking of meeting up irl, but you both haven't spoke about it to each other as it might seem weird.

you also both know what each other looks like because you know, you guys are extremely close and it just seemed right to show each others face.

(that's if you're comfortable only. if you didn't/dont want to show your face then it's okay <3 diluc loves you either way - he's not here for ur looks.)

diluc has always dreamt of meeting you irl, to see each other face to face, to take you on expensive and lovely dates, to give you his all but of course, everything comes with a problem.

because of covid, some flights have been delayed and closed for the time being, which means that diluc can't fly to you or you can't fly to him.

when you had finally built the courage to tell diluc, you was surprised by his response. "diluccc?? can i speak to u abt something rq?" "sure y/n, what's up?"

(just telling you, he responds to your texts so fast - whether he's streaming, buying food, etc)

"well i've been thinking about like yk, meeting up?" diluc, when he read that message was in SHOCK. i mean like, he was going to say it anyways but the fact that you too also thought about it? wow, that just made diluc want to fall to the ground and roll around squealing while making happy diluc noises but i wont go any further.

what i mean is that diluc is now smiling like a mad man while responding to your message "well, i was thinking about that too. but because of covid i dont think we'll be able to meet up. what if covid restrictions are lowered? would you be able to fly over?"

NOW IT'S YOUR TURN TO ROLL AROUND AND SQUEAL.

you immediately respond, typing extremely fast that your message turns out to be looking like this -> "if covid resitrction ar elowered yes ofc, would u be able to fly oevr to me thoygh?"

you've left diluc worried and dumbfounded..

anyways you and diluc spend the next few hours talking about meeting up irl and planning on what to do if covid restrictions DO lower.

you and diluc are both super excited about meeting up irl. imagine the feeling when you finally meet up with the person you love the most. euphoria.

now the thought of meeting up face to face is all that occupies dilucs mind, you and diluc seem to be eager to meet irl so diluc makes sure to check the news everyday just to see if they've lowered the covid restrictions

diluc also checks up on you everyday, from the morning, afternoon to night. he makes sure that you're feeling alright.

diluc also sends you boxes of plushies and clothes to you <3 you know those people who ship people self-care packages? yea it's just like that but instead diluc ships you a whole box filled with plushies that you've told him you wanted because they're just so darn cute

diluc also ships you matching clothes so that you could both match when you do meet up.

ALSO SENDS YOU FOOD!! snacks you've always wanted but never could because of your parents? oh what's this lying on top of everything - the snacks you've always wanted? no way!!

also gives you free diluc merch. always. sometimes daydreams about seeing you wearing his merch <3 intentionally ships you the larger version because.. oversized clothes..

diluc makes sure that no person is harassing you, if they do well.. lets just say that their account gets banned in the next hour because of diluc telling everyone(and i mean everyone.) to go report their account and makes sure that their account is banned.

"y/n you seem uncomfortable, is everything alright?"

(normally you text him within a few seconds yet you're texting him after like 4 minutes which is not normal, unless ur busy or something)

"oh yea, some creep is just making me feel uncomfortable right now" "user?" "oh uh it's ___" diluc in the server: !!everyone go report this user rn "___"!!

diluc literally sends them a rude message - "dont ever talk to y/n or any person like that again you disgusting perverted creep, go get a life instead of leeching off women and other people you fat piece of shit", then diluc goes on to report them, block them.

y’all know the “sweetest pie w/ wink” song? yea just imagine diluc blocking them in slow mo(just his fingers showing) and then him winking when the wink sound comes on while throwing his phone.

there's also a channel for edits, and majority of them are ship edits, edits of you and diluc. the only reason why diluc even made a channel named "edits" was just so he could see the edits people made of him and you. he saves them and sometimes even rewatches them just so he could see that moment over and over again.

wishing that something like that would happen, wishing that a miracle would happen.

streamer! zhongli x online friend! reader

zhongli, also known as "morax" was always known for his cool, calm and collected nature, his soft, honey like voice and his amazing gaming skills despite being always calm.

he was never like those hyper energetic streamers who cried whenever they lost a battle, he just responds with "gg" and resumes playing.

and because of that, zhongli has attracted many people who are now, his loyal fans.

even though zhongli is always calm, his looks do not help either way. everyone goes crazy over his long and healthy hair, and his face

and zhongli is aware.

zhongli had met you through a server on discord, it was a server for those who loved to play games and find a partner to play with. so when the bot matched you and zhongli to play - you two become very quick friends.

zhongli admired your skills and you did too!! you both exchanged ways to kill an opponent. you didn't really know that is was THE morax so when zhongli asked if he could friend you, you agreed!! you've just made your very first friend.

(im kidding, maybe not.)

since that day, you two would play together and battle against each other - it wasn't about winning, rather it was about having fun and that was exactly what you and zhongli were feeling.

when you told and showed everyone about your new friend, they all said that, that was morax, THE morax - the famous and skilled streamer.

when you found out about it, you talked to zhongli about it and he confirmed. you, was in shock. you.. were talking with an extremely talented and popular streamer? how could this be..

but that didn't change your relationship. zhongli had thought that once you found out that he was a famous streamer you would take advantage of him and just use him for fame but - nope!

your relationship with zhongli was still the same, you weren't using him, begging him for expensive items and etc.

after you found out about zhongli being morax, zhongli just made you mod for his stream because why not and invited you into his discord server.

just like diluc, he made you - your very own special role!! it was called "them<3" and if you wanted to, zhongli made you the owner.

zhongli is a mature person, and is very wise so he knows what he's doing.

may or may not have made a vc only for you and him..

you and zhongli have a pretty close relationship, you both check up on each other and your personality matches with zhongli's really well, no matter how crazy or calm you are.

if you're extremely hyperactive and is.. a bit crazy - zhongli has no problems with that. he IS always calm and collected so he doesn't mind you acting all crazy like a childe that had just eaten 5 packets of sugar.

if you're like zhongli, quite calm and doesn't really make a ruckus - you two are like the perfect match. if you two were next to each other, you both would be sitting down, legs crossed as you watch your friends being extremely crazy. unbothered of course.

zhongli had always thought of meeting up with you. he has always have, the thought of having you in his arms makes his heart swell.

the more you talked with him, the more he fell in love with you. your personality, the way you cared for him and others, the way you never changed your personality whenever talking with people, there wasn't a single flaw about you. you, were perfect.

when zhongli brought up the topic of "meeting up irl" you immediately replied "i've been thinking abt that too^^ do you want to meet up?"

ha.. haha.. you've got to be kidding me, right? OFC HE WANTS TO MEET UP W/ U

but back to the meeting up plan..

you and zhongli talk about meeting up for the rest of the day and you both agree that once covid has calmed down a bit, zhongli would fly over to you

also sends you cute plushies that remind him of you, sends you merch of his own

zhongli gives you a plushie of him to you <3

you also give zhongli a plushie of you and you know those bfs who take care of the plushie their gf gives to them? that's what zhongli does to them.

when your plushie is shipped to zhongli, as soon as it arrives - zhongli makes sure it's in good condition and takes care of it, it was like zhongli taking care of a baby.

every night he puts the plushie on his bed and puts the covers over it, pulls out his phone and takes a photo of it, sends it to you and sends the message "lil y/n is going to sleep now"

every morning he brings the plushie with him to the bathroom, he puts the toothbrush next to the plushie and takes a picture of it with the caption - "lil y/n is going to brush their teeth now"

it's just so adorable, he also does this every time he's doing something, eating lunch, streaming, writing, going to the gym and etc.

sends you his merch!! for free ofc. also buys you snacks, self care products and cute decorations for your room or house.

streamer! xiao x online friend! reader

xiao's a complicated one, well for other people. he's reserved, doesn't interact with many people outside, and always has a nonchalant expression so it's hard to read his feelings.

you and xiao both met on discord, you two shared the same interest so you two got along pretty quickly. despite xiao known for not communicating well, you, somehow made xiao felt like himself

that might sound cliché but the way you always made sure that he felt comfortable despite it being an online relationship made him feel safe, you didnt use him, pressure him, or try to get anything from him and that reassured him that you weren't a bad person at all.

since day 1, xiao found himself longing for your attention, he wanted to text you everyday and he hoped that you would too. and you did!

after a few weeks, xiao surprisingly told you that he was a streamer and other information about him. you checked his account and god.. he had over 1 million subscribers

but just because xiao was famous doesn't mean anything, you continued to talk and xiao and still treated him the same way.

just like diluc and zhongli, he makes you mod and invites you to his discord server. he welcomes you and asks if you want a special role

"hi everyone, this is my friend y/n. please welcome them :)"

"you can give me a special role if you want xiao" now, xiao doesn't want people thinking he's a simp but at the same time.. he wants you to feel special as you made him feel this way.

xiao gives you a role called "y/n <3" WITH THE HEART. not just "y/n", "y/n" with a heart.

he also gives you all the perms, so technically you're kind of the owner??

just like diluc, dedicates a whole category about you, and for you.

often checks what's posted in there, makes sure that there aren't any nsfw posts about you - and if he's checking the edits well.. he's going to be saving all the ones he likes and goes onto his tiktok and followers the tiktoker who made that edit.

also he sets an event where the best edit of y/n that he has been sent will be the winner and get nitro ^^

"why not an edit of u??" "no."

he just wants to see you.. in an edit. not him, he has seen multiple edits of him but he'd rather see you <3

did i talk about how xiao literally talks to you every single day? no? okay well.. every single day xiao sends you a good morning and good night text and he makes sure to put EFFORT when texting you.

no small or dry texts, he makes sure that you dont think he's being dry and all..

you know those little xiao keychains and plushies? yeah xiao gives you them.. when you get them you almost immediately put the keychains on your bag and put the little xiao plushie on your bed

you take a picture of the plushie and send it to xiao, xiao's heart nearly burst just looking at the photo.

xiao has seen many videos of online friends/besties meeting up irl at the airport and blah blah blah - but xiao can't help it but continuously watch those videos, pretending that it was actually you and him meeting up irl.

you and xiao have actually talked about this, and you both agreed that you would fly over to his place and hang out there.

but that would only happen once covid restrictions lower.

lemme just tell you something, online or not - xiao will always smile like a mad man whenever he reads your text, why? no idea.

just you talking or even interacting with xiao makes him feel so happy.. you make him feel some type of way and xiao wants to cling onto that feeling.

also if you told your parents and friends about xiao he would be the happiest man alive.

xiao brags about you to his friends <3 they get so tried of it honestly

"yea like y/n is the best. they’re so kind and i just cant, no words can explain how much i love them." "i get it xiao. you've been talking about them for hours now.."

in all honesty, if xiao could, he would be kicking his feet in the air, his hands clutching his phone as he covers his mouth with the phone, rolling side to side while squealing.

(i mean like.. he would tho)

he would also be giggling whenever you send him a "good morning" or "have a great day <3" text, yk those men who like chuckle but it also sounds like a giggle? like not a high pitch giggle but like a kind of.. soft yet heavy giggle?? yea.

streamer! dainsleif x online friend! reader

HOW ON EARTH DID YOU CATCH HIS EYE(ATTENTION)?????!?!?

give me your ways please.

but enough of me begging, lets get into the good stuff >:)

you and dainsleif met a LOONG time ago, online of course. you two first started to interact with each other when the owner of the server(in which dain and you were in) was recording a youtube video and the title was “matching people to become lovers” and im guessing you know what happens.. no? OH WELL- ahem. i mean, oh well basically..

you were just minding your business when all of the sudden you were put into a discord call called “lovers <3″ with another person- their user was, yup! you guessed it! “dain”

by some miracle that name wasn’t taken so it was pretty rare

“ooo and who do we have here? y/n and dain? seems like a pretty good pair!!”

after being put in the vc you immediately wanted to leave the call until you heard a “how are you.”, it wasn’t a “how are you?” it didn’t even sound like a question.

you didn’t want to leave this man hanging so you responded “im.. uh alright, you?” “mhm, good.”

now this voice wasn’t one that you didn’t recognize. before you’ve been in many vc’s and you’ve heard this man called “dain”s voice before - many women in call would swarm and fawn over him

of course you were one of them, except you were extremely weird with it and you weren’t like “OH MY GOSSSHH IT’S DAIN!!! AHHH” you were the “he has a nice voice. cool.”

but what was weird was that HE actually started the conversation first, dain never talked first, only talking first if he was being asked a question.

after that you and dain started to talk more and more

“sooo, do you know why we were being put in this vc?” “not a clue, but anyways”

after that conversation dain sent you a friend request and of course you accept!! who wouldn’t? and surprisingly, dain only had a few friends(5.)

dain would always decline other friend requests as he had no clue who they were but the fact HE friend YOU first?? mad luck.

day by day you and dain grew closer to each other, you and dain actually had many things in common, how you both liked the same game, how you both liked the same food - it was like a “match made in heaven”

sometimes you and dain would play 1v1 games, just to play together y’know? but the thing is, dain is way too easy on you. why is that?? like get ur big balls on

BUT ANYWAYYYYS, sometimes dain teases you and honestly, that gets you flustered cause.. dain is never known to tease and yet here he is, teasing the hell out of you

“dain!! you’re being way too slow!” “i know.” “?? wha-” *gets shot* “who’s slow now?” “.”

now months later, dain is absolutely IN LOVE with you, you were so kind and considerate. you was always there to give him encouraging words when he needed them the most and you always went out of your way to cheer him up - and those are only a few reasons why dain adores you so much.

and dain finally accepted that he’s an absolute simp for you.

after a few months you and dain were close and comfortable enough to show each other faces to each other and that’s how you find yourself complimenting the shit out of dain :) 

like once dain sent his pic you were in?? shock?? 

*sends pic of him* “you’re not real.” “yes i am, do you think im lying?” “NO IT’S NOT THAT YOU’RE JUST SO... PRETTY?? LIKE HELLOOOOO??? give me your good looks pls..?”

i don’t think i mentioned how dain was in complete shock when you sent your pic first?? because good lord, he was red. extremely red. like yea he loves likes you but the fact that you’re absolutely gorgeous?!

drop deap gorgeous.

yes, dain had a nosebleed upon seeing your picture(selfies??).

i could 100% see dain buying and sending you plushies of him.

“dain, why did you send me a plushie of you??” “because, free merch.”

free merch?? was he some youtube or something??

once you questioned him about it dain finally revealed the truth: he was a streamer

at first you didn’t know what to say but there was one thing you needed to do: find him on twitch.

you hop onto your pc while dain keeps on sending you messages like “.. hello? y/n?” “y/n.. are you..”

*searches “dainsleif” in twitch* * finds dain’s twitch* “!!!” “1 MILL+ SUBS??”

“DAIN. WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME EARLIER?? i could’ve seen your pretty face the whole time ;(” *dain blushing profusely*

yes, and now you watch dains twitch there and then(everyday) and you always donate to dain sending him cute messages like “how are you dain?? - y/n” or “Y/N’S HERE!!”

dain always softly laughs at your messages, he finds you so adorable

now, because of covid, there was a really low chance that you and dain would be able to actually meet up.

you and dain have been thinking about this for a few weeks now, you two have been extremely close and you two were practically best friends now..

so why not meet up??

you and dain discuss about this and decided that dain would come over to your place for about a month or so once borders open up and have fun together - you two would also be vlogging and going to many places together <3

dain is SO excited to meet up with you, he has dreamt of this moment since forever.

he wants to take you everywhere, spoil the absolute shit out of you and kiss you

dain would be so shy if you two met up irl, although he has been dreaming about meeting up with you - he can’t help but feel nervous. even though you both aren’t meeting up right now it seems like it.

you and him talking about meeting up just makes him nervous(in a good way!)

+ dain would buy you cute chibi keychains of himself, he might even make one for you!! a chibi keychain of you and him holding hands <3

streamer! albedo x online friend! reader

him? having a crush on you? you must be dreaming.

there’s no way that the one and only albedo, the famous and handsome streamer had a crush on you.

how is that even possible? albedo never showed any emotion towards anyone, only smiling and laughing sometimes. but never have albedo looked at someone with genuine love and care.

and that makes you feel some what special. but what can you say? you feel the same way towards him anyways <3

so, how did you two meet? well.. once upon a time albedo was just streaming when he accidentally(how??) joined the wrong server and you were the owner and welcomed him

you were so kind and albedo felt bad if he left so he just stayed and replied with “thank you” and the rest they say, is history.

im just kidding, let me just throw in bits and pieces of the most important details

about albedo, albedo was one of those “among us” streamers during quarantine

and that’s when his popularity started the bloom

most of his viewers were just there because of his content OR his looks, he looked like he was an goddess, his face looked like as if it was carved by angels themselves, his hair looked soft and silky and his calm demeanor and soft/calming voice made girls fawn over him.

because of his calm demeanor, people have always thought of him as an unproblematic(WHICH HE IS!!) streamer and a shy man but nope, albedo IS unproblematic but he isn’t quite.. shy

but after meeting you - things changed, you changed his life and.. him over all.

you and albedo talked after you welcomed him - then things started to escalate(not really), you and albedo had a lot of things in common and that ended up with albedo friending you and honestly, he didn’t mind friending you. you were fun to talk to and he meant it

and since then you two have been talking non stop <3

within a few weeks albedo’s fans started to notice odd changed with his behaviour

albedo always paused his game or said “sorry guys, i need to do something” and got on his phone, typing something and then.. smiling?? who’s this? this is NOT albedo.

albedo would also seem more happier? he seemed like he was in a better mood every single day and not that anyone’s complaining.. it’s just, odd.

moving on!!

you would always send albedo cute cat videos and very concerning tiktoks but did albedo care? no, as a matter of fact albedo goes onto elaborating the tiktok you just watched which sometimes is a bit unnecessary but also funny.

“ALBEDOOOOO” “Y/NNNNNNNN” :GUESS WHAT ‘BEDO??” “WHAT IS ITTT???” *sends a tiktok of milk* *sudden change in text* “hm, this is rather interesting. i’ll look into it more, thank you y/n.” “?? ALBEDO WHAT DO YOU MEAN? IT’S JUST MILK..” “there’s a deeper meaning.” “...”

not to mention albedo is NEVER dry to you, never ever.

but to others? yes.

does he have a crush on you? yes

but do you know that? absolutely not??

OH OH AND ALBEDO HAS TIKTOK!! YES!! I KNOW RIGHT!!??

you two have tiktok of course, and you and albedo sometimes duet each other LOL

it would be absolutely random but the comments would always match your energy and honestly, you loved it.

sometimes you would hop onto tiktok trends and dance to whatever

albedo would OF COURSE like it and favourite it

(also are we not going to add that he’s literally so supportive of you when you do those “tiktok viral dances”??)

(*posts a tiktok of you dancing to a viral song not even putting in effort* albedo: YOUR MOOOVVVESSSSS!! <3″ “>:) ikr”)

and seeing you on tiktok makes albedo want to meet you in real like and honestly, albedo already thought about this but did he tell you? no

he’d rather surpirse but then again.. would that invade your privacy??

would that make you hate him?

that’s when albedo decided to ask you and what you said surprised albedo

“hey y/n, i just want to ask, would you like to meet up one day? like irl?” “i’ve been waiting for you to say this, YES” “it sounds like you’re saying “YES” like i proposed to you..” “oh?”

and now you and albedo are waiting for the covid restrictions to lower so you two can finally meet up irl <3

just the thought of you two meeting up excited the hell out of him

albedo is growing more and more impatient as time goes by

but enough of that. what would albedo ship to you?

well, he would ship you his merch, his very own plushies(high quality), keychains, and his very own stickers <3 AND SO MUCH MORE TOO!!

would package them neatly and makes sure nothing breaks during transportation.

also puts in some snacks for you <3

and adds his own personal card/letter to you!!

soooo.. how do people know that albedo likes you? easy!

it’s the change in behaviour whenever he’s “around” you

albedo could have a nonchalant manner on but as SOON as he hears a “ding” he immediately grabs his phone and once he sees something(your text) his face lights up and a faint smile forms

it’s so obvious, that this guy does not care about anything except you.

streamer! scaramouche x online friend! reader

what’s it like constantly being bugged by the annoying scaramouchey?

good? bad? alright?

honestly, it isn’t thatttt bad to be bugged by scara BUT sometimes he says the weirdest stuff ever and it concerns you.

but moving on :)

what do i even start on..

right! how did you and scara meet? well it all happened way before scara hit 1 mill subs

you and scara had been online friends since forever, you two met on a gaming server and since then you two have been getting closer and closer every day <3

scara was always mean to you, not that you care anyways - you and scara would go back and fourth throwing insults at each other before one of you give up(which was never scara)

but after a few months(years..) scara finally opened up to you and started to be a LITTLE bit nicer to you.

then scara decided to become a streamer as he has seen articles that said that becoming a streamer makes you thousands and even millions of dollars

scara informed you about his doing and you encouraged him :) you said that you were going to be there by his side during every step of his journey - and what you said to him seemed to have an effect on his brain.

scara seemed to appreciate you more day by day and you loved that about him, he wasn’t as mean as before but he was a bit better.

throughout his streams he grew more and more

and of course you helped him!! by supporting and promoting/hyping him back!!

you would post things like “GO SUB TO SCARAMOUCHEY!! >:)” and “hey y’all.. it would rlly help me and my scaramouchey if u could sub to him!! my son would be so so proud ;(”

and of course scara would be so embarrassed every time you posted something like that.. who wouldn’t?

once scara hit around 300k subs he started to gain popularity on tiktok WHICH boosted hi dono’s and subs

but there’s one thing that scara always did at the end of the stream, start of the stream and is always in his bio - he always makes sure that your @ / name is there. he wants everyone to know that it was YOU who supported him through out the years

but even though scara is embarrassed that he’s doing something so “lovey-dovey” he still allows it to be there. and you’re always reminding him of that and teasing him but at the end he still doesn’t remove your @ / name

why? well.. he just doesn’t want your name out of his sight.. hhhhh

time skip

scara has now more than 1 mill subs and your name is still on his bio!!

what a faithful man, y/n get the hint!!! >:(

you and scara have NEVER met before and that really saddens you(and perhaps scaramouche too..)

yes you could’ve met each other a long long time ago BUT you two were young and your parent(s?) were extremely strict and wouldn’t allow you both to meet up.

but now that you’re both grown up.. that means you can meet up with each other!!

scara already booked the tickets for.. the next month..

scara will never admit this but: he really wants to meet up with you, like really bad.

he wants to feel your touch

he’s too much of a tsundere to even admit that..

he’s always mean towards you that you doubt your relationship

“why are you always so mean to me :(” “im not even mean to you.” “yes you are, you hurt my feelings” *scara: panicking that he hurt your feelings* “ok fine, im sorry.” “are you really..?” “yes. now shut up” “ouch.. that hurt my feelings..” “...” scara really wants to punch you but in the middle of the punch he puts his fists away and kisses you instead.

AHEM. but i wont go into too much detail about the plan for the meet up..

moving on

one of the things that scara doesn’t do but everyone does(^^) is that he does not send you stuff, like at all.

the ONLY thing he’ll ever send you is his merch. that’s all. nothing else.

he says that you’re “not worthy” for “other things” and that makes you sad, but what can you do? he’s scara

scaramouche will be scaramouche..

(but secretly he does want to send you stuff but is too scared that you’ll think he’s weird)

but you being scara’s crush.. it’s kind of complicated.

though scara is mean to you and all he still has his own way of caring for you

maybe he’ll show you his way of loving when you both meet in real life..

note: if you would like to be added to the genshin taglist pls just ask me!! dont be shy <3

taglist: @tomansimp @one-offmind @miitchiji @dainsleif-when-playable liking + following + reblogs are very much appreciated!! another note: sagau x reader fic and event coming very soon!! please give me some ideas for my event, i dont mind any :) tell me if you would like to be in sagau x reader taglist(to be early lmfao) <3 also scara’s and albedo’s part is rushed so im sorry if i doesn’t make any senssseeee

#genshin impact x reader #diluc x reader #zhongli x reader #xiao x reader #albedo x reader #scaramouche x reader #streamer!au #dainsleif x reader

[keefwho]

September 12 - 2023 Tuesday

8:55am

I'm having the thought that I don't want to be seen today. I'm having the thought that I won't be able to live up to my own standards let alone anyone else's. I'm having the thought that it's all too hard and I'll never be able to keep up. I'm having the thought that if I don't figure out who I am, I will be left behind. I'm having the thought that I can't show myself around other people when I'm like this. I feel a sinking sensation in my chest. It makes me want to stop trying. It makes me want to hide until it goes away.

3:05pm

What I'm "changing" right now is instead of giving into the urges to scroll twitter, turn on a Twitch stream, or join a discord VC to distract myself, I'm sticking to nothing but music to occupy me while I do my afternoon work. These urges I have aren't things I really want to do, they are just a means to escape how I feel about myself right now. I trick myself sometimes by thinking it's always a good thing to be around people, it means I'm growing a relationship with them. But that might not be true. I struggle to put my heart into most people so spending time with them is more of a chore than anything and because of that I think nothing is really grown or nourished. The truth is right now I feel inadequate and am very likely to self sabotage any activity I pursue. Maybe I just need to sit with myself until I'm in a state more ready to take action.

11:15pm

First of all I'm late to bed because I felt the need to take care of myself more out of stress relief than anything. Probably shouldn't have just because of how late it is. I think really I just wanted to feel something good today.

I had turkey spam, green beans and carrots, and spicy ramen for breakfast. It's one of my favorites. I set up the Vortex mod manager so I can start looking into Starfield mods. I was a little late to stream because I was deciding whether or not I wanted to stream today at all and I decided to which I regretted. I just didn't want to interact today, I felt upset at myself for lots of things and didn't want to show it. Work went VERY slow and my stepdad called me out to help him move big logs halfway through which was annoying. I do like the manual labor sometimes though. I stopped my stream halfway through and very slowly finished it off stream, although I still did it within the maximum time frame. I felt terrible for my performance today.

I cleaned up a little my putting away my clothes and taking the garbage out/cleaning the garbage area. I have a bad habit of half assing cleaning surfaces, I'm learning to do it more properly which does take more time. So I did that and felt pretty good about it. Lunch was fish sticks with mac n cheese and a pear cup. I watched some Chris Chan during my lunch break.

The request today was from someone who had lied to me about their age awhile back in a dangerous way but they are of age now and are a patreon of mine. Today Daisy mentioned how I should have blocked them whenever that happened and I should have, even my friend Bramble said that closer to the time it happened. I wish I did too but I was in an interesting place where I was trying not to cross my business and personal life. Obviously in hindsight even my business should not be associated with someone like that but at the time I had cut them from my social life and allowed them to come back when they turned 18 to start paying me for art again if they wanted. In the end it kinda worked out but I do still feel weird about having them around. But they only talk to me as an artist, I have no desire to actually hang out with them.

I made good progress on this old MLP pic of mine again, it should be done tomorrow. I'm trying to start a new habit where I specify the project I'm going to work on earlier in the day so that I'm not left choosing when the time comes.

After work I played some Starfield until Daisy wanted to play Just Dance. It was a short session because we were so tired. Then we hopped into my server VC which I was looking forward to until a very annoying guy joined and the uncomfortable individual I just wrote about. Daisy wanted me to stream Mother 3 for her which I was happy to do even though I was just grinding the same enemies over and over for awhile. I didn't have anything else I wanted to do specifically so it was okay. The call sucked though because those 2 guys where giving me a headache and wouldn't shut up for half the time. I barely said anything the whole time.

Daisy and I chatted a little bit while she was in bed afterwards. I opened up a little bit about how things have gotten more intense lately and how scary it is, but in a good way. I feel relieved that it's being talked about in this capacity finally, it's like I've been holding myself back because I didn't know if my feelings were being reciprocated as much as they are. I still don't feel like that but that's either because I still need to process it or its my long term issue of self doubt. Either way I consciously know what is true and that gives me the opportunity to make myself believe it.

Today I was very moody in general. I was frustrated and sad at a lot of things. In general I feel like I'm not making as much progress as I want. I've literally failed in the sense that I haven't done a good job of refining my behavior to invoke actual change. I'm still chilling in my comfort zone and I know I am. In some ways I'm afraid to take action and get better because any change is scary to me. Sometimes I feel like it's not worth it even trying because again I think it's impossible for me to be good.

My current formula is to keep trying anything I think of to see it's effects. It's been a lot of experimentation which brings a lot of failure but I cant lose sight that anything I try will teach me something. My current priority of sticking to my schedule and finishing certain projects is being undermined by my lack of self praise for actually doing these things. I think I need to redirect my focus from just getting things done to realizing what I have gotten done. I tend to do things and move on like I never even did them. It's no wonder I feel bad basically convincing myself that I did nothing of note when I actually did.

Another one of my ideas to try is to make a hierarchy of sorts for the kinds of things I can do and the requirements that precede them. To most people this would seem weird and maybe it is but I might be autistic af and this might be my solution. I need to write things down for later or else I will always forget it and repeat the same cycles over and over again.

Edit: I meant to add noting at least one positive thing I did today to counter how I always evaluate my negative thoughts in the morning. Today despite feeling so bad, I did get my schedule done in it's entirety which is impressive. Hours of work got done.

#journal #diary #thoughts #moody #upset #bad day #sad #getting better #self growth

[tinyorangepotato]

I'm constantly so needy and jealous and I'm glad I don't (at leats I think I dont) show it because god that would be annoying. this is the first time in actually a little while since I have been unable to sleep when I wnat to (usually around 12 or 1. it's now 2:30 and ive tried to sleep) and im awake and energetic while being sleepy and if someone walked up to me and said hey let's go take a walk and chat, I would be so down to join. I just wanna talk but the one person who I would enjoy talking to will probably be back awake in 2 hours and hopefully I'm not still awake by then because I got work in the morning and I alreayd suck at waking up and now I'm going to sleep even later than usual.

anyqyas back to the main topic, God I just want to cuddle or hang out and watch a show or just lay down and chat and hang out with someone and I should've been selfish earlier when he got us in a vc but wanted to go to sleep at 9 but I can't. there's no reason for me to insist on staying talking other than I wanted to and I know he would be sleepy so not talking as much and has ti wake up earlier than I do and do more intense work which he gets almsot no break from and so he needs his sleep but what about me (that's sarcasm(proabbyl the wrong word). I'm not that needy... maybe)

but like one of my friends will go to a Halloween party and have a fun time and run around and drink and shit meanwhile I fucking wish. God im just so envious of anything and everything always. I wish I wasn't always the driver but I'm the only one of my friend group that can drive and make plans. i wish I had other people I liked to hang out with because , again, I'm the planner of my group and I dotn host parties or whatever and I just wanna feel like the movies show. where you go to a party (it doesn't even have to be like a huge one like how 21 jumpstreet has it or whayever) and hang out with peope and do crazy ish things and drink and run and jump on a tire swing (that's what I'm friend did) and man. I just want ti have fun. other people do either with getting new things so starting a new hobby or getting into a new show and talking about it constantly or going out somewhere and not having to worry about everything.

I don't know where I'm going with this. but fuck I want things. I'm now putting aside all of ym paychecks except a full tank of gas (fill up when I get paid) and 50 dollars for getitng food when at work or any emergencies. I have been giving myself like 150 but I realized how much I owe while also still trying to save up for a place which I think jm the only of the two of us saving but that's okay because he makes more and will be paying for more things and he's already actually paying for his car insurance and all that while I'm not so I can afford to be broke when I get paid.

I owe like 5k still for my teeth (it's all just paying back care credit and I think I ahve 10 more motnhs to do it but im paying like 300 everyone month and I get only around 1k every month. so hopefully I'll be saving around 600 every month).looked at places and even the cheapest trailer was still a down payment of around 7k menawhike ive got not even 3 saved up and my dad still owes me that 1600 but he's been having a rough time even in his new better job so that's still gonna be a while.

and once we do get the place, I'll have to buy a mattress and dresser and all that shit becaus ei don't ahve fucking anything. hell I don't even have my own 4 walls to kepe anything at the moment. I got a second technically 3rd) job but that pays like shit. it was legit paying minimum wage so not even 9 dollars a d I've made 70 bucks the first pay period I've worked there (2 weeks) which is dogshit. for 8 fucking hours. at my first, better job, I would've made close to 120 with taxes removed. but I cant fucking get mor ehours there because of my fucjing aunt

I love her and I like to help out and she's the onyl reason I have a car and insurance (car insurance thay is) and have food every day but god damn. Sunday Tuesday and Friday I pick up carry out and then go to her place from like 11-3 (it's fairly random hut usually fits w8thin that time). so it's not like i can work more at job 1 seeing as they close at 6 and thay extra 2 and a half hours is not worth driving there and back. so I got another job but I've barely been scheduled and when I have it's been times I alreayd said I can not do. so I gotta pick up others shifts but my brain says "or you cna ignore the message and watch youtube" so that's usually what I do.

I wish I had a more simple schedule. even if I went to my aunts like 7-11 or at night it would work better but she's nto awake rhay early and she goes to lay down at around 6 so the time we have rn is the best time. but it fucks everything.

hell I would be more happy if I even just had a room to myself. that's all I want. please. even my friend who doesn't have a mattress to sleep on has a room and privacy and now 3 kittens constantly interacting with them and fuck. I qant soemthing for myself. I'm legit signing up for Doordash just so I can make a few extra bucks when I got ahit else to do.

I just want and need and fuck man im not gonan ever say it to anyone because I'm constantly like this and it's irrational and selfish so I'll keep it to myself to not harm anything. I'm a possessive and needy can't but no one will know because I push it down because it won't do any good to let it out.

(also really doesn't help rhat I am spending a few hundred on Christmas present for my friends but shhhh that's how I show love I guess so it's okay)

#tiny talking #tiny vent #... its now 2:50 #please. i want to sleep

[copperpicture]

me: “haha i am playing video game with my friends and having fun :) i will join the voice chat with the random strangers on the team because i am a profesheeunal gamer :)

some fucking dude WHOLLY out of nowhere the litcheral instant i joined, with a very large amount of passion: “--no! if youre non- nonbinary? you can go die! if you’re nonbinary you can go die. fuck you for making more terms for me to learn”

me:

#ah ! video games. #my friend who joined the vc earlier than i said that someone made a 'did you assume my gender' joke and in return whoever #said 'ladies and gents' just went fuckin bonkers #and i am :] #bruh i got no fuckin clue whats goin on #copper does a blah

[eldunea]

headcanon dump on pokéverse lotor’s grandpa ezra because i love this man with my whole soul

(this post refers to @aeshmedai​‘s unova. this post also operates with an alternate history of wwii.)

BIOGRAPHICAL NOTES

ezra was born in the 1920s, eldest son of the sincline family and next in line to becoming court alchemist. when he was a kid and young adult he was a major ass. he was born with pretty much everything--wealth, striking good looks, intelligence, talent, inheritance to the position of the harmonias’ court alchemist--except, that is, common sense. he was also born in a country where racism and other forms of discrimination didn’t exist, and didn’t want to think about the world outside unova’s borders because it was a hellish cesspool and he preferred to just exist in his utopian bubble where there were next to no problems. he was stuck-up and fairly ignorant--also lazy because his extreme intelligence meant everything came easily to him K-12. two things kicked his ass eventually though: one of them was college. the other was his future wife and lotor’s grandmother, malaea.

malaea was a native alolan student. this was still in the early-mid 1900s, when many parts of alolan culture were still outlawed. ezra saw her and was lovestruck at first sight--she was the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen and when he saw how smart she was he fell in love with her even further…she was legit the only person he’d ever met who he thought might be smarter than him and that made him crush hard. but malaea, even though she liked how (book) smart he was, was constantly annoyed by the cavalier attitude he had toward the real world’s problems. any time she brought up the problems facing the real world, his response was pretty much “don’t worry, unova’s going to fix that” and her response to that was always “THEN HOW COME THEY HAVEN’T FIXED IT ALREADY?!” 

they split over a conversation about the upcoming world war ii. malaea was worried there’d be a war and that fascist germany would start conquering countries. and ezra was just saying the same “don’t worry, it’ll be fine! unova’s going to stop them and this will all be over before you know it.” (narrator vc: it was not, in fact, over before he knew it.) he went on about how he had relatives in the army who would never let this injustice stand, how unbeatable unova’s knights were in battle and how if germany’s leader tried to pull anything she would quickly find her head crushed between the jaws of unova’s royal dragons. and that was it, malaea finally had enough. 

she yelled at him asking him how he could be so blind, and so stupidly patriotic. she said she felt like unova wasn’t actually as great as everyone said it was, because if it was so great at saving people, how come the world still had so many problems? and if unova couldn’t solve what was going on in so many other parts of the world, what guaranteed the possibility that unova could stop germany? ezra just told her she ought to shut up and be more grateful to the country that protected people like her because without unova, she’d never be able to live in a place where racism didn’t exist. malaea stood up and left, telling him she never wanted to speak to him again.

things slowly got worse and worse after she left. he started out as a lazy fuck when he first went to college because he thought due to his genius intelligence he could just breeze through his coursework and spend the rest of the time partying, getting drunk, playing hooky, performing as a coordinator and doing dumb stunts with his pokémon……until he failed out of college. his father not only kicked him out of the house and told him to get a job, he also removed ezra from the succession to the court alchemist position. he did not know where the heck to even start getting his life together because he had never truly learned how to be an adult--which is part of what drove him to join the army.

when the war came, it was at this point of his life that he had an awakening. he had felt so secure in the knowledge that unova was going to stop the rise of fascism and halt the crimes being done to jews and romani in europe that he hadn’t fully comprehended the fact that they would have to do something drastic to stop it. he had spent all his life idolizing unova because he thought it could save the world from any disaster, but he had never even attempted to wrap his head around the fact that in order to save the world you have to get off your ass and actually save it. so he finally did it. he got off his ass. he vowed to help save the suffering peoples of europe. and he enlisted.

he came back from the war a changed man. no longer was he this arrogant, pretentious little boy who wanted to just ignore all problems that didn’t directly affect him. on the battlefield and in the liberation of concentration camps, he had seen the horrors of the world…and most importantly, he had seen firsthand that unova was not in fact guaranteed to prevent all those horrors from happening. everything he thought he knew about himself and the world was completely shattered over the course of six long years 1939 - 1945, and he wrote about it in a memoir that left out not a single detail. 

malaea read his memoir, shocked that someone as immature as him had chosen to fight--and she was truly moved by the transformation that he had gone through. she got ahold of him and told him she was glad he’d grown so much, and that she wished to be friends again. ezra, who had loved her all this time (and even had said so in his memoir), was overjoyed. he didn’t expect anything from her romantically; he was just glad to be in her company again. as it so happened, the two of them fell in love. they married soon after reuniting, and had three beautiful daughters--the youngest of which was honerva, lotor’s mother.

while he was writing his memoir and reuniting with malaea, ezra began questioning where to take his life next. he had always “wanted to” be court alchemist, but the war made him question whether he actually wanted to be an alchemist or whether he was only attracted to the prestige and the trappings of the position. after going back to school (and not being a lazy little bitch while studying), he decided to major in psychology. he had felt the effects of the war in himself and seen it in others, whether they were fellow soldiers or concentration camp survivors that he had helped rescue, so now he saw his life’s path as helping them through their traumas. to the shock of everyone in his family, he refused the position of court alchemist and went on to become a therapist specializing in PTSD trauma. he is now one of the world’s leading experts on the topic, having written many books and papers on the topic that have been translated into multiple languages, and having given lectures all over the globe.

OTHER NOTES

his heritage is german jewish (ashkenazi), specifically prussian. and he is very white-passing, with blond hair and blue eyes. 

no one is sure how high his IQ is, because he has received the maximum score on each IQ test that he has taken. however, it is estimated to be at least 180.

he speaks seven languages: english, unovan, hebrew, yiddish, german, japanese and alolan.

in the army he rose to the rank of sergeant, and he won a medal of valor. he still has his old military uniform and his old gun, and he treasures them greatly.

he is honestly just? so good? so pure?? like help this may be the first genuinely good--not morally grey or otherwise fucked up--character i’ve written and might possibly maintain an interest in. he is 100% the wholesome influence that pokéverse lotor needs in his life like g o d i’m so glad i retconned his death because now i can write him being the good bean he is and AAAAAAAAAAAAAA

despite being 99 wholeass years old, he’s still physically young, and he will be for a while--as will some members of his family. this was because during wwii he was exposed to xerneas’ energy from a divine weapon crafted by the cult of valhallor (the pokémon universe’s version of the nazis). he often says that it’s such a great irony that the cult, which wanted to kill all jewish people, ended up extending the life of a jewish man and his family by potentially hundreds of years.

as mentioned earlier, he was a coordinator in his youth. he was trained in ballet and originally did a lot of appeals in the beauty and smart categories, but while he was in college for the second time, he found his true calling in cool/tough. outside of unova, everyone in those categories underestimated him in his debut, calling him a namby pamby pretty boy……until he fucking brought out his guns. most people in his position would have cut their hair and abused steroids to get bigger and look tougher, but he never did because he had a brand to maintain: he became known as the pretty boy who played with guns like it was no shit.

nowadays he doesn’t go onstage like at all, but he is pretty outspoken about harmful trends in the coordinating community--such as the trend of cool- and tough-specializing coordinators being total assholes in order to cultivate a persona.

#npc. || EZRA SINCLINE #headcanon. || EZRA

[bigbrothernetflix-st]

EPISODE FOUR

“ ‘something will be unleashed’ are u gonna start KILLING PEOPLE??” - saira

HOH: Nick UPSIDE DOWN: Emma & Kiki NOMINEES: Monty & Saira POV: Jev FINAL NOMINEES: Monty & Saira EVICTED: Saira (1-0)

JOSH C

well, we just voted out GINA and i'm feeling some kind of way about it. i feel like the push to save emma was VERY quick and i think there are a lot of alliances going on that i'm not involved in which is FINE but it's just something i need to watch out for. i know i talk with almost everyone constantly so i think i'll be okay for this week, but i'm just worried about the people that i enjoy.

a lot of people have said they don't talk to saira or brianna so i wouldn't be shocked to see them both go up, which is FINE i guess but i enjoy both. i don't want saira to leave at all but i don't think she has as GOOD of a social standing as brianna does. which is worrisome because i know this is her first game so she doesn't have any pre-existing relationships to save her which is.. not ideal.

i'm finding things a BIT frustrating because i have to navigate not ONLY game thoughts but people's pre-game relationships. not that i'm knocking anyone for them but almost everyone i've talked to says they don't talk to monty but they wouldn't want to see him nominated. i just don't FULLY understand why we can't nominate him but they're friends with him so he's a bit UNTOUCHABLE. i might push it anyways because he's the only person i don't really talk to anymore. WHO KNOWS.

i've felt like a deflated balloon for most of today so maybe i'll just go with the flow on this but i need to make sure i'm not just voting out all the people who will be votes for me later on. 

ARIA

Im small, bitter, and very angry...but spite is the best motivator and im going to use it to win this season. Anyways i miss saira im SICK of trusting nicks, i see a nick i FLOOR IT!!! I refuse to have a nick fuck me over in a game again i am so over it. But hehe anyways lets get into the info spilling section real fast and then i can analyze because my position has drastically changed from last time-

also sorry for repeated info but sometimes i forget things or people say it again so..

-nathan leaked "all" his alliances to me (Screensht is cut weird i think theres one he cut off)

-Jacob found out my gina connection

-perfect voting record is dead (told jacob i voted out gina tho idk why hehe)

-kiki-joey connection 

-emma knows about bri's backups because jake leaked it to her before he left

-josh c IS EVERYWHERE

-nick says they havent talked to bri

-nick likes jev

-nick wants (more so wants others) to take a shot at kiki/nash

-nick said nathan is a wildcard 

-joshua nommed monty and nash

-STOP UNDERESTIMATING JOSHUA

-told josha jacob is protecting him

-joey exposed saira's deal to me and bri

-joey wants a larger alliance

-bri said they like nick,,,but that conflicts earlier info so im thinking peer pressure or just bri is too sweet for this cast and i adore her-

-bri told nathan her noms

-nathan hates bri and for wHAT??

-jacob has a dpov and used it to cement a f2,, AND DID THE SAME THING WITH BRI FFS 

-jacob scared of nick and jev

-kiki and nash tell everything to jacob

-jacob said emma and joey have a connection??

-jacob thinks nick is gonna join the emma jev joey side (his words)

-jacob thinks monty is a threat

-jacob ranked the players in tiers as follows: 

A kiki jev bri

B joey joshua nathan

d: nash saira monty

-bri talks a lot with kiki and josh c

-told bri about the trio between jacob kiki and nash

-joey told me yesterday he wants to win,,,but then just said to take him out

-planting seeds against joey to bri

-jacob wants to bring dpov up with alliance at f10

-joshua and jacob were shook saira was evicted

-told jacob that joey asked to throw

-jev and jacob are getting closish

-jacob is so threaten by nick

-jacob told bri that nathan doesnt like her

-

and thats where im at currently. Lots of options and lots of interconnections I have to navigate but i think im gonna be fine for the time being which makes it super easy to just be complacent and float my way to jury BUT!!! I want to try setting myself up well where i dont get clocked at f9/10 and wabam im out. Im trying to set people against each other subtly but honestly i think im overestimating myself here but at least i know im safe. I mean for now im trying to set up this side of jev emma joshua to at least form together as a group but im STRUGGLING i might just have to settle for them keeping each other safe without a solid alliance ig. At the same time I think i really have two actives pieces of info im working with which is emma knowing about bri's backups and then me and bri knowing about jacob's dpov.

So i think what I want to happen is that Jacob wants to dpov nick out at f10 so i'll let that happen probably which puts a huge target on jacobs back, idk if its anon but if it is ill make sure bri leaks it kinda framing it in a "if you leak it and i pretend to not know i can analyze how other people respond so we'll know what everyone thinks" and once jacob leaves emma can leak the bri's angels (which should be weaker at this point since jacob is the glue that holds it together a bit) which #1 makes a bunch of good players house targets and then forces those people to solidly stick together as well. Not sure how im gonna play both sides but,,,,if i can play it off kinda like i did in pasio somehow maybe i'll be fine but who knows. Either way im here to have fun (and hopefully win for gina/saira)

WELL WELL!!! just did a vc with jacob, he decided to take matters into his own hands and be totally cracked and now thinks nick/monty/nathan are a side,,,,which,,,,idk yall nathan did show me all of his alliances and none of them were that but who am i to stop jacob from making himself a target by leading this charge against them uwu. I do need to be more proactive about leaking tho but im not sure how im gonna work that. Also im not sure if i want nick/monty/nathan all gone, i can live with monty gone bc they probably think i nommed them and might want revenge but also nick and nathan are kinda cute numbers for me,,, 

I mean idk because at this point i have a game relationship with mostly everyone left in this game and im just not sure which path i need to take to get to the end yet and its kindaaa stressing me out a little bit. I can feel myself starting to drop in peoples trust rankings a little bit and god its kinda annoying how jacob has this game wrapped around his finger, however i dont need to be in a dominant position this entire game i believe in myself!! I got this easy peasy!!! 

JEV

My reverse psychology paid off and I won the veto so I'm loving that for me, I'm not going to be using it because I'd preferably like to see Monty leave because I just... never see them and I think Saira is much more deserving of her place here than Monty is. It's frustrating that Monty is cruising through this game so easily because we haven't spoken to eachother since day one, and they haven't even bothered to come and speak to me to campaign for me to use the veto. Like, do you want to be here or not?

Thinking about it more, I'm super happy I won the power of veto. I managed to ensure myself and those I'm closest to in this game weren't going to be named as renom and kept Monty up there as a final nom, which I'm worried otherwise wouldn't happen during this game since people seem either threatened by Monty OR a little over-eager to keep him around in this game, which annoys me but whatever. I just hope whoever wins HOH has the balls to make the right decision, better to get him gone now rather than later.

JEV

So I think I've had a little bit of a brainwave/breakthrough. This is gonna be longwinded so hear me out.

Apparently from what I've heard, the nominations this week were revealed in order of who recieved the least to the most nominations from every

one. This is extremely interesting to me, as I've taken note that Nick, Aria, Jacob & Brianna were 10th-8th in the rankings of votes respectively.

First of all, I haven't made secret that I think something is going on with the Pasio alumni. This was highlighted when I was asking around for what people were doing for nominees, and from everyone I heard Saira/Monty, but from two people I heard Saira, Nash, Joey & Monty -- with Monty strategically placed last in the ranking, to give the illusion his name was the least uttered. Funnily enough, the two people I heard this format of the names were Nick and Aria who just happen to be Pasio alumni... interesting, right?

So looking at the ranking, I'm thinking "okay so they obviously didn't do eachother, and with Nash/Joey in 3rd and 4th respectively, they must've not expected so many votes on Monty and didn't plan accordingly, and so split the votes too much and didn't have enough to put up Nash or Joey over Monty. So I'm thinking, I know there's a connection between Jacob and Monty because I used to play orgs with them on Skype. Jacob used the veto on Brianna last week, this has brought me to the conclusion that Monty, Nick, Brianna, Jacob & Aria are working together with the possibility that Josh C is either playing both sides or is fully with them too, hence why he recieved the least votes.

That places Myself, Emma, Kiki, Nash, Joshua, Joey & Saira on the outside, and Nathan too as I'm guessing he's strayed from their alliance and/or wishing to work with them, hence why he recieved 5th most votes. 

I'd love to make an alliance with this group of people, but it's still only pre-jury and I don't want to be seen as playing too hard too soon.

(cont.) So I initially wasn't going to go for this HOH, but I feel like I need to because I can't trust anybody else to make the move to take Monty out, and I'd rather see their numbers thinned sooner rather than later. It would paint me as their #1 target for next week probably, but if someone I trusted won HOH next week then I could go to the upside down and not have to worry about it.

JEV

Yes again I'm so sorry, another thing that was interesting to me was that I mentioned to Aria that I was close with Emma, and she asked for an alliance with the 3 of us almost immediately after, stating that she was also "very interested" in working with Emma too. This tells me she's the mole and wanted the alliance to try and get intel from us, I don't believe for a second she did Saira/Monty along with me and Emma at all, which is why myself and Emma are hesitant to say too much in that alliance chat. So I like Aria, but I don't trust her as far as I can throw her.

HOST WEEKLY CAST ASSESSMENT

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hL__dyRaq2E&list=PLFEwPPy8j010XXwntq80VSU0qLNTNpSIN&index=5&t=0s

#bbnetflix st

[nahoo883]

VC Lior Susan has a big idea that seems to be working: building next-generation industrial companies

Many investors in Silicon Valley are waiting the next big platform. That’s fine with Lior Susan, a former Flex exec who in 2015 cofounded Eclipse Ventures with the legendary venture capitalist Pierre Lamond, long of Sequoia Capital.

The duo, along with a team that has now grown to 13 people — happen to think the Next Big Thing is not whatever comes after social networks and flying cars; they think the biggest opportunities that too few VCs recognize is the chance to augment or else build from scratch the next Honeywell or GE Johnson & Johnson through full tech stacks that enable speed and efficiencies that are hard for incumbents to rival. 

As Susan likes to note, pointing to the runaway success of companies like Apple and Amazon that do it all, “Software is not enough.” He’s also quick to point out that the average tenure of the biggest U.S. companies — those on the S&P 500 — was 33 years back in 1965 and soon, it’s expected to shrink to 14 years.

Certainly, Eclipse is putting its money where its mouth is. It has already helped to create and fund one company — Bright Machines — which primarily develops software for robotic systems that manufacturing companies already have in place, and that Eclipse enticed numerous Autodesk executives to lead.

Now Eclipse, which also makes early-stage bets on startups, is working on creating another company. And Susan suggests that more companies will follow.

It’s an ambitious strategy. But because investors seemingly approve — committing $500 million to Eclipse’s third fund earlier this year (up from its second, $185 million fund) — we sat down with Susan recently to learn more about both who he is and what Eclipse is trying to do. Our chat has been edited lightly for length.

TC: You grew up in Israel on a kibbutz. How do you think that shaped you?

LS: I grew up in a family of four — three boys and a girl. I grew up on the north part of the country, on farmland, growing bananas. My grandfather was one of the early establishers of the [Israel Defense Forces] so I thought i was going to be a soldier all my life. I didn’t think I needed to go to high school. And I joined the military in 2000 and was in the special forces until 2008.

After that, my brother and I started a networking company, Intucecell. He was always more of a brain than me, to be honest, but from an early age, I was very curious about mechanical systems, and he was always curious about software, and we started Intucell in 2008, raised $5 million from Bessemer [Venture Partners] in 2009, and we sold the company to Cisco in 2012 for $475 million.

It’s funny, because we grew up in this community where no one has a bank account, it’s all about sharing. Maybe because we were raised in a very socialism pathway environment, we became the other extreme as adults.

TC: How did you wind up in Silicon Valley?

LS: They didn’t need me [at Cisco] because he was the brains, so I thought I’d come to Silicon Valley for three months and I wound up randomly meeting Mike McNamara, who at the time was the CEO of Flextronics. I had a little man crush [right away]. I was like, damn, I can learn a lot from this guy. He told me [Flex, as the company has been rebranded] needed someone to build a special operations tech team inside of the Flex. I was thinking I might go kite surfing in Brazil. Working in an American corporation didn’t sound like the right thing to me. But we liked each other and so I [joined the company].

TC: What was that like? What were you focused on?

LS: For the first 10 months, I actually moved to Zhuhai, China, where one of the main facilities of Flex was [situated], and there I saw firsthand high manufacturing at scale. And the interesting thing, what got me thinking about [the path that led to Eclipse] is that Flex had 12 segments: aerospace, automotive, consumer, yadda yadda. And each of them will do more than a billion dollars [a year in revenue]. And I would see them talking about how their industries are changing because of software. I mean, the language was identical across these very different markets. And I started to understand that three or four decades of technology innovation were coming together to create what we now call full stack, so networking and clouds for infrastructure and open source and DevOps tools and open source hardware and supply chain and manufacturing — they were coming together. 

I thought, if those [big] companies could use those tools, could small companies use those tools and essentially accelerate and go faster? So I started building those companies inside Flex, inside this division. And surprisingly enough, I saw it was doable, that the cost of capital is going down and you actually can move much faster.

TC: What were some of those companies?

LS: One is Elementum, a supply chain management company that has now raised close to $200 million. Another is Bright Machines, which is actually in our [Eclipse] portfolio now. We had six companies when I left.

TC: Were these funded solely by Flex at the outset?

LS: Flex was 100 percent funding the companies at the beginning — and giving them resources and connections and customers — and we’d either spin out the company and get outside capital, or just keep it internal.

TC: Why leave that role to start a venture firm?

LS: I was living in Palo Alto and started having investor friends and was making some angel investments, and I saw most of my friends just looking for the next dating apps. I was like, ‘What about supply chain stuff?’ but they wanted easy stuff that explodes very fast.

So between seeing what I did at Flex and realizing that few investors were interested in this opportunity, I decided to do something. My original idea was to take $10 million of our own [family] money and be a kind of super angel. But when I told Mike [McNamara], ‘I’m going to leave’ and ‘Thank you very much, I learned a lot,’ he said, ‘Hey, do a fund.’ And we launched and started investing and we saw the size of the market that we had in mind was growing fast. [Editor’s note: After spending 12 years as CEO of Flex, McNamara joined Eclipse four months ago as a partner, along with Sanjay Jha, who was most recently the CEO of Global Foundries and was both CEO and co-CEO of Motorola Mobility before that.]

TC: You have an interesting team. Among others, you have McNamara and Jha. You also last year brought aboard Greg Reichow, who was previously Tesla’s VP of production. These are not necessarily the usual suspects when it comes to people joining VC. Does Eclipse operate like a traditional venture firm?

LS: Our style of investment is slightly different than other people; we maybe look more like private equity than venture, including that we’re very involved; we do nine to 10 deals a year with eight partners. We also aim for a much higher ownership than firms usually have and our heavy operational backgrounds is our tool to win those deals. We have some idea of what a complex operation looks like, even while we’re investing in industries to which we didn’t have exposure before, like health care and real estate — places where we didn’t expect to invest but that are being impacted by the same paradigm shift.

TC: How did the Bright Machines deal work? The startup started as an internal project at Flex, so do you co-own it with the company?

LS: It started internally at Flex. There were 400 poeple working on it internally, and I went to [Flex management and its board] and I said, ‘I want the team.’ Flex said, ‘Absolutely no.’ But I went back with a better argument why they should, including that they needed to hire talent that wasn’t going to come to work for Flex, and that the company could be worth $5 billion, $7 billion some day. And after 12 months, we carved out the company, with its [intellectual property] and the $350 million in contracts it had, and we created a new company, and we own 20 percent, Flex owns 28 percent, and the team owns the rest. And it’s on a $100 million annual revenue run rate already in less than a year as an independent company.

TC: What do you see happening with Bright Machines?

LS: it will go public, I’d guess in sub five years. The model is pretty compelling if you’re doing it right.

TC: How does the deal underscore your broader thesis?

LS: Think of it this way. It’s really hard for me to compete with LinkedIn, LinkedIn has very smart people. For me to compete with Honeywell or Dupont or Rockwell . . . I’m not saying they aren’t smart, but they have a different mindset. There are many companies that Silicon Valley has never heard of but are $17 billion market cap companies with little to no technology. So if we now have the talent internally, we can use the talent to create these platform companies. In fact, we’re building our second one, though I can’t share more just yet.

TC: So Eclipse is an investment firm and an incubator.

LS: We debating this name constantly, but we aren’t an incubator.

My two cents is that public equities are getting destroyed, so limited partners want to go into private markets. Some of the hedge funds like Coatue understand this, and they’ve created vehicles to [invest in private companies]. But in the private equity world, a fund that manages $400 billion and used to buy assets with financial engineering [meaning debt] is [not wringing the same kind of returns out of these bets]. If you’re buying Avis, you’re going to lose your shit because people are using Uber.

What’s happening for the first time in the last two decades is that someone made the music to start, so there’s musical chairs where there were none empty before. It was always the same five or six firms winning the best deals, and that was about it. Someone like us had no chance to grab a chair — no freakin’ chance. But public equity dollars started showing up SoftBank style, and now they are reacting. And you learn that when you react in the military, you jeopardize the house. You go outside of your discipline, and you go outside of your comfort zone, and I’m attacking the chair. I wonder if I can sit.

from TechCrunch https://techcrunch.com/2019/06/17/vc-lior-susan-has-a-big-idea-that-seems-to-be-working-building-next-generation-industrial-companies/ via IFTTT from Blogger http://www.topnews99.club/2019/06/vc-lior-susan-has-big-idea-that-seems.html via IFTTT

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