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#my goal of being a content creator is to create more than I consume
jotun-design-party · 10 months
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on fandom orientalism, ft. a quick visual example:
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the example on the right is something i drew solely using references of the top results i saw on pinterest upon searching "jotun loki." please don’t roast my inconsistent handwriting
south asian cultures are often jumbled together for white artists of all kinds (authors, artists, movie directors) to create a sense of mystery and make things look "more foreign."
note: this doesn't touch on the antiblack racism in canon jötun designs; this post is primarily about fandom-sourced fetishization. i heavily encourage people to reblog and add onto this post anything i may have missed or added nuance
cut: links on orientalism, in-media examples, how this manifests in fandom-made content
i'd like to start off by saying that this post is a white person telling other white people how to spot orientalism in relation to fiction. i am by no means an expert on any of this, but my goal here is to start creating a less ignorant space that doesn't push people out of fandom.
i'm just trying to stir up more conversations about this and get other white people to think more critically about how they engage with the content they consume. nerd shit should never come with a sacrifice and it's extremely upsetting to see people of color consistently forced out of fandom communities, especially when modern superhero comics began as a way for jewish people to have a voice.
if this post upsets you, i don't want to hear it. don't tell me, "it's not that deep," or, "keep politics out of comics." it is that deep, and superhero comics have always been political. if you have the urge to leave a comment or send an anon about how you don't think it's a big deal, feel free to block me instead, because i don't care and you'll just get blocked anyway 👍
with that out of the way,
Q:
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A:
there are countless ways to design a character in a way that makes it clear that they are an alien, or to make them sexy, and there is no excuse to perpetuate stereotype that put real-life people in danger to do so.
"Orientalist paintings and other forms of material culture... depict an 'exotic' and therefore racialized, feminized, and often sexualized culture from a distant land." [¹]
there are so many examples of this in loki fic and art. it's extremely common to see loki depicted as a feminine object of desire. they may have longer hair. clothing that serves more as an accessory than an outfit, that isn't suited to protect them from either the harsh cold of jötunheim or the sunburns one might get when surrounded by reflections of the sun off the snow. draped in jewelry, and in a compromising position.
i'm sure you can imagine how this can get especially out of hand in relation to thorki. i would speak more on thor's presence as both the white aesir prince or the strong barbaric jötun, but as i'm not comfortable consuming thorki content, i don't have enough context to speak on the stereotypes used outside of the art pieces i've seen while searching for jötun loki fanart.
i am, however, confident in saying that orientalism often serves as a device for fan creators to show a contrast between Asgard's white-viking-british-accent-magic-science-elegance. jötunheim, in the comics, is often portrayed as a less intelligent, cutthroat, barbaric, and bloodthirsty culture.
"There was always something unknown and uniquely different about Orients which reinforced the distinction between the European 'us' and Asian 'them.'" [²]
the green link in particular comes with a helpful tool for anyone who might be inexperienced in spotting racist themes in media. if you have trouble being confident that the media in question is orientalism, this link comes with a checklist scale to score how likely it is to be an offensive depiction.
an example that most of you will be familiar with is Disney's Aladdin (1992). the green link goes much more in-depth about the intricacies of Aladdin's orientalism, and i heavily HEAVILY encourage you to read it, as it will help fully grasp the way fetishization and demonization go hand in hand in orientalism.
here, i'd also like to use it as a comparison to show why this loki stuff is honestly... egregious.
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by now, even the visuals here should seem very familiar.
the source goes on to use arranged marriage as an example of a common "trope" in orientalist fiction. as previously stated, i don't consume thorki fiction. however, i am EXTREMELY confident in making the guess that it tends to be a common theme when jötun loki is paired with an aesir thor.
i'd also heavily recommended this article and this wikipedia page, both on the negative and stereotypical portrayals of romani people; loki is a magic user, and i suspect that one of the reasons there is such heavy use of these appropriated, exaggerated, and fetishized themes and visuals is because of the demonization of romani people as tricksters, thieves, and witches.
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wyattjohnston · 11 months
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The Results Are In!
102 people took the time to complete this survey and while a larger sample size would have been ideal, I am eternally grateful to those who took the time to fill it in. I acknowledge that it was very long and I'll be cutting questions if I do this again.
Before we go any further this is not a list of instructions on what you absolutely must write. Your own creativity, inspiration and goals come before anything somebody else may want. At the end of the day, this is primarily a collection of data that fascinates me.
You will find that there are things you do that some readers have said they do not like to see. If that is going to upset you, make you spiral, or otherwise reduce your creative output then please leave. Nobody is forcing you to read these results.
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Style Preferences
The Importance Of...
Rates These Tropes/Themes
Main Character
Player/Team Preferences
Engagement (currently incomplete)
Fic Finding
What do you want to see more of in general?
Is there anything you would like to see less of?
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Feel the Love
These are the unedited compliments.
What do you want to see more of in general?
I’m happy with anything
already love everything!
I'm just happy to consume what's being put out.
Not helpful, sorry, but there is nothing I’d like to see more of because what’s out there is already a great mix of my faves
Nothing in particular I feel like there is a good mix of everything that I like I’m not very picky when it comes to things like that! :)
writers creating their content freely and experimenting with different styles and tropes
whatever writers want to write!
Authors writing for players they enjoy because it truly makes a difference in their writing.
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Is there anything you would like to see less of?
I think writers should write whatever they feel like 😊❤️
No, never, fanfic is free and to be explored at all times. A theme is never overdone as it’s done differently each time
If something doesn’t interest me I scroll on by. I wouldn’t want to remove things other people might enjoy even if I don’t
not much im quite happy with what ive read/interacted with on tumblr
This is one of the biggest things I’d like to see change. Writers should be proud of what they create.
Just i'd like to see less of authors selling their own art, that they personally created and spend so much time on, short
Like sentences like "it's so bad/probably not good/don't think anyone will like it" cause them i'm gonna read it thinking "oh, okay, it's probably not good" and then i read it a lot more critical than i would have otherwise cause i always think that if the author themself says it, doesn't it have to be true? And usually if i would have just read the fic without this first i would have absolutely loved it but now i just feel a little conflicted (and might still love it, but it's just not the same)
It's just sad to see and i'd like to give every creator who does this a big hug <3
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vonithipathachai · 11 months
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The Mario Movie and the Place of the Film Critic
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So.  I saw the Mario movie at the theater with my friend.  …It was fine.  I figure I probably would’ve enjoyed it more if I had a closer personal attachment to the Mario franchise.  But I think it mostly accomplished its goals of being pleasant, light-hearted, mentally undemanding entertainment for families and fans of the games.
I will say, though, that as someone who doesn’t consider himself a big Mario fan despite having played his share of Mario titles, I found the discourse around the movie’s critical and commercial reception to be far more interesting than the movie itself.  In the days shortly preceding and following its release, I found my YouTube feed being absolutely bombarded with Mario movie-related videos.  These included not only blatant spoilers, but videos from YellowFlash, Ryan Kimel, and other anti-woke content creators weaponizing the movie’s success and using it as an excuse to take the piss out of Disney and the critical establishment (not that Disney and certain critics don’t deserve it).  Now, I do feel I have something to contribute to the conversation, and I lean more on the side of the supporters of the Mario movie than the detractors.  But I’m really not interested in waxing polemic here as, again, there are plenty of other people who are far better known than I am doing that already.  Instead I’d like to ponder how we got to this whole situation between the critics and the audience in the first place and what can be learned from it going forward.  Because I do believe we’re witnessing change in motion as Mario smashes the box office and big movie studios are finding themselves compelled to take notes.  We might as well make the most of it.
The first thing we need to ask, which many who’ve observed large gaps in critical and audience approval ratings on Rotten Tomatoes have wondered, is “What is the purpose of film critics?”  Considering the question from a purely utilitarian perspective, I’m sure most would agree that they (at least in theory) act as a guide for the moviegoing consumer.  We all have limited time and money to spend on media consumption, and we would ideally like to spend as many of these finite resources as possible on “good” movies rather than “bad” ones.  Already we can see an issue here, as what exactly defines “good” and “bad” will vary between individuals.  Some audiences simply want a dazzling audiovisual spectacle to relieve themselves from the suffering of mundane life for a couple of hours, while others may be looking for more substance from things like narrative, actor performances, themes, etc. so that they may feel personally enriched by the movie experience.  Since the very nature of the professional critic’s job demands that the critic think more, well, critically about the movies they watch—carefully analyzing a film’s strong and weak points to argue for or against said film being worth seeing—they naturally fall into the latter category of defining “good” films primarily on the basis of substance.  This is not necessarily a bad thing.  In fact, it can be good, as it creates the potential for meaningful discussion and new perspectives which can help the ordinary audience member appreciate movies in a new light.  It does, however, create an alienating effect between critics and more casual members of the audience.
Further compounding the issue is that the professional critic, once again due to the nature of their job, is likely to have different viewing habits from those of even other substance-oriented individuals within the general audience.  They have to do multiple screenings per week (as many as 10-12 in the UK, not sure about the US) on top of writing their reviews and submitting them before the deadlines.  Not only that, they do not have the luxury of getting to pick and choose only “good” movies to watch, but must watch whatever movies are assigned to them by their superiors, including all of the “bad” and mediocre ones.  When you have to sit through so many movies, especially Hollywood genre movies that tend to follow similar plot beats, you naturally develop more keenly enhanced standards and sensitivity to whatever sticks out, both for better and for worse.  This partially explains how Star Wars: The Last Jedi was able to win significant amounts of critical praise for “subverting expectations” and “taking risks” while at the same time drawing the ire of longtime fans.
With this in mind, it is easy to wonder why anyone would want to be a professional critic at all.  A more pessimistic or distrusting individual might say that critics are driven by a desire for clout and prestige.  Monetary gain would play a limited role at best, as the majority of film critics are in fact paid very poorly and must find additional income elsewhere.  This typically comes through other forms of journalism, as critics are often college-educated with degrees in journalism or communications if not film studies specifically (which in turn explains how many of them can be construed as “woke” or otherwise politically left-leaning).  But when the critic’s more demanding viewing habits have such great influence over how they assess what they watch, this limits the scope of people who take their opinions seriously, usually to fellow intellectuals who may or may not lean left themselves.  Ultimately, the critic persists out of a sheer love for film as an art form, and the advancement of film as art is something their work gives them a vested interest in.
So then where does Mario fit into all this?  When considering the critical predilection for substance instead of spectacle and their more refined viewing standards, along with the Mario movie’s safe, sterilized, corporate-mandated handling of the titular character and his world combined with a barebones and predictable story, it is not difficult to imagine how the movie could be given underwhelming critical reviews, even without accounting for any possibility of woke bias.  If the critics can be said to “hate” the Mario movie, it is because it is antithetical to everything they stand for as intellectuals and lovers of film as art.  It is pure audio-visual junk food.  Well-made and satisfying junk food, but junk food nonetheless.  But as far as its target audience is concerned, this is perfectly fine, even if it could do with just a little more time spent on plot and character development.  Therefore it can be considered a “good” video game movie.  Which makes it all the more curious that the critic scores have caused such an uproar.
As of this writing, the Mario movie sits at a 59% approval rating from critics and a 96% approval rating from audiences on Rotten Tomatoes, which is only a 37% difference.  For context, a movie on the site only needs a 60% critical approval rating to be considered Fresh, leaving it only a single percentage point away from Fresh status.  It does not even have as low of a critical approval rating as similarly critic-Rotten-and-audience-Fresh movies on the site, such as Venom (30%C, 80%A, 50% difference) and Uncharted (41%C, 90%A, 49% difference).  If the critics are too distant from the Mario movie’s target audience for their opinions to be worth consideration, then why is such a fuss still being made?  Wanting to break the “video game movie curse” is no longer a viable excuse; by this logic, Sonic would’ve broken it already with two audience-Fresh movies well before Mario.  The only logical explanation I can think of is that this is purely a matter of personal validation.  The critic scores are essentially the one blemish on what has otherwise been a perfect triumph for Nintendo and its fanbase.  …Either that or all the complainers are just a vocal minority and I’ve unwittingly found myself in one of those echo chambers.  Maybe it’s a little bit of both, who knows.
I’d like to end this piece off with some advice, not that I expect either party to abide by it.  Critics, if you are interested at all in expanding out of the intellectual bubble and gaining greater audience respect, it could be prudent going forward to try and put yourselves in the shoes of the movie’s target audience.  Not every movie is trying or even needs to be Shakespeare or have a profound social message.  Audience members, especially gamers, if you really don’t care what critics have to say about the movies you like, then just act like it.  It makes you look a lot less stupid.  And, uh, enjoy this possible new trend of high-quality Nintendo movies while you can.  Shigeru Miyamoto’s not getting any younger.
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cmns201assignment · 29 days
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A Semi-coherent Rant About Commercialism in Media
I have a lot of thoughts and opinions on commercial interest in media, few of them are good. Initially, my mind jumps to social media which has become an endless onslaught of advertising and a massive perpetuator of ‘hustle culture’ where everyone is constantly looking for ways to make money. However, these ideas have also seeped into traditional media, placing monetary gain above creativity. A very cynical thought, I know.
Over the past few years, I have become increasingly aware of how commercial interests influence the content I consume, particularly when it comes to social media. Personally, I don’t often create my own posts or actively engage with others’ posts beyond a ‘like’. The majority of my social media use consists of watching YouTube videos or shorts, so I try to think critically about what or who I am watching, especially when there is any sort of advertising involved. For me this means being a bit picky over which creators I watch and always questioning things. If the content is expository, does this person have the credentials and/or sources to support the information? When it comes to content with sponsored, or even unsponsored, product recommendations I tend to look at the creator as a whole – what kind of content they produce, what efforts they make for transparency with their audience, the type of language used, and what do they stand to gain from these posts. Or I just try to avoid and ignore advertisements as much as humanly possible which is easier said than done.
That’s not to say that I don’t ever fall for the social media hype or think I’m better than people who do; if I’m being honest, if my financial situation were different, it’s likely I would give into it more often. One of the few perks of being a broke university student is that my wallet forces me to take the time to think about these things. Often in the time it takes for me to save up for things I want, I usually end up realizing I either don’t need it or never really wanted it in the first place.
Also, I think it’s worth noting that this awareness is extremely irritating. Sometimes I just want to mindlessly watch dumb videos or influencer drama, or to buy the thing just because I want to, but this questioning has become a habit so that rarely happens. My avoidance of ads has, in some cases, led to me reluctantly giving in to subscription services – whether or not it was worth it is still up for debate. My hatred of subscription services is a different rant for a different day, but my avoidance of those as well as certain tech companies (mostly Apple but again, different rant for a different day) has caused me to miss out on a lot of content that is exclusive to their platforms.
Media and commercial interest are so thoroughly intertwined that being a consumer can sometimes feel like dodging bullets and I think that overall, it has just made me very cynical. Between corporate influence, the rise of lifestyle influencers, and ‘hustle culture’, it feels like fewer and fewer people create just for the sake of creating. Of course, I understand that people need to make a living, I don’t take issue with that at all. I think what really bothers me is that commercial interest seems to have taken center stage and created this narrative that media should only be produced with the goal of monetary gain. As someone who paints as a hobby, I can’t count the number of times people have suggested I sell my work and are shocked or confused when I say I don’t want to. This attitude discourages people from creating just for fun, implying that if you can’t make money then you shouldn’t bother in the first place, which is an incredibly depressing mindset.
So, while my self-righteous attitude towards media and commercialism may be a bit dramatic and irritating both to myself and others, I do think it’s at least somewhat justified. For the sake of my sanity and my wallet, I’m going to continue as I have.
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kuwuuji · 1 year
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(this applies more to twt than anything, but i like being annoying and talking a bunch everywhere so i thought it would put this here too 🤔 - i was just getting qrted a bunch and i got all thinky abt art and fandom and minecraft)
hi koji here! 
i've been personally thinking a fair amount about artist intention and execution, especially in fandom spaces since earlier today when one piece of mine started getting a lot of backlash because of how some people interpreted it to be representing (you probably know where this is going by now!).
for starters, i want to provide some food for thought: in pure technicality i (a fanartist) might not be the "actual owner" of my work; the creator who made the content that the fandom is based around is. because of this, the highest level of fandom (the curators) have a deciding factor over what the "true intention" of what a fanartist might be whenever they create a piece for that fandom. through fandom and for other fandom-adjacent communities (think, like, religion - not a fandom, but a community of people with a shared belief/interest/goal), this is known as subjective interpretation. 
as it's been understood across time, subjective interpretation of art is its lifeblood - often, art cannot exist as it's meant to be without a pair of eyes to observe it (i think leon botstein said something similar to this) and fanart cannot exist without the fandom that surrounds it. i can say "i did not create this with the intention of doing xyz", but the fandom surrounding that work (who are the people that consume my content) could impose a different projection of their thought onto my work.
despite this, i can work with what i know to be true about my intentions and art and to assert i do not "ship" quackity with anybody, and that any and all of my work surrounding the depiction of him is done in a satiric manner not meant to offend him or his friends. i do not take pleasure in making anybody uncomfortable, nor in creating hypothetical scenarios in my head of a romantic relationship between two people who express no attraction to each other in their real lives and have not explicitly stated that they condone and are comfortable with being imagined together.
however, i do see why this piece in particular might have communicated that i participate in those kinds of activities regarding quackity, which is why i also feel that a large piece of context might be missing from the bigger picture - internet history, specifically vocaloid internet history. this piece's pose, theme, and iconography are in heavy reference to a 2014 hatsune miku/megurine luka song called "magnet" that famously features the two singers expressing their fear of approaching the other romantically at the risk that they might fall in love with each other in a society with prejudices against gay people. obviously, this song is undeniably romantic in tone and theme. despite this, the pose i used, along with the iconography (butterfly headphones) are commonly used in parody fanart of magnet for romantic, platonic, and comedic pairings.
(see: this drawing of buzz lightyear and jiraiya in a magnet pose: https://www.deviantart.com/inicka/art/BuzzXJiraiya-Magnet-CRACK-194448929)
(also see: this parody of magnet from the perspective of donald trump and hillary clinton: https://m.soundcloud.com/haru-16/clintonloid-trumpoidmagnetutau) 
as you can see, this is not inherently "seriously romantic" - i.e. magnet's cultural impact has shifted beyond just this characterization of miku and luka being in love, but also as a meme to put characters/people in. does anybody look at buzz lightyear and jiraiya and think "hm, i think this person definitely meant to depict this pairing in a serious light with the intention of shipping them together"? i... didn't think so. (i want to point out that i also don't know the average age group of the people who are taking issue with this piece ((since it might have been relevant for a conversation about missing context)), but i think that weaponizing someone's age to "prove" that i know more than them in some way or another is unproductive and kind of embarrassing.) 
i also want to call to attention my own way of using magnet's themes. magnet's "traditional" pose is often associated with a more sensual tone than i was comfortable with replicating to a T in this drawing, so i explicitly went out of my way to NOT follow the positioning of the mouths or the "amount" of half-closed-eyelid action (since that might have communicate some more subtext that i already stated i wasn't comfortable with adding). (xtra note: i didn't include any tags that might have been interpreted as "shipnames" either in order to avoid that kind of interpretation, and i was also consistent with this tagging criteria on tumblr.) 
the way i drew dream and quackity is purely to communicate a joke (maybe we would call it a "spoof" back in 2014) reflecting the state of inter-fandom discourse in the minecraft community. as im sure we all know, contemporary internet culture and humor tends to be shifting towards more conversation around human contact and relationships (think 2020 suddenly removing much of our physical connection from our daily lives and how we expressed our frustration with that loss, if you need specifics refer to humorous phrases like "you wanna kiss me so bad it makes you look stupid", etc.), and i thought that magnet's reference to the past and the comedic aura it's able to communicate would have been a funny way to express how i felt towards all the (frankly, actually stupid) "drama" i've seen in the minecraft community.
do i believe dream and quackity are in a romantic relationship? hell no! i don't know why that would even be an assumption someone made about me! do i believe it would be really funny if they hypothetically made out in the midst of all of the drama? yeah sure absolutely! it'll likely never happen, but they really do have the opportunity to be the funniest guys in the entire world. i'm sure a lot of people (mainly people who are both dream and quackity enjoyers, such as myself) feel the same way regarding some sort of desire for lighthearted interaction/communication - we're very upset by the way fandoms have been treating each other, especially since the core concept of a live translation service should be to bring people together, not drive them apart. there is no excuse for the violent hate-speech and threats i've seen come from both sides of this argument, and it's personally devastating to me that this is the fallout of projects that quackity and dream both worked hard to fine tune and release.
lastly, i want to reiterate a point i made via dm with someone regarding this: we do not know dream and quackity, but dream and quackity know each other. part of the reason i feel like i should have the space to stand up for myself regarding this piece (which, by the way, is definitely not that serious at all to warrant this long explanation, but i like writing so its a win) is because dream liked it on his fanart account, and i find it hard to believe that dream would go out of his way to break quackity's boundaries when he's probably very well aware of them (as with all of his friends - obviously, i don't want to make wild assumptions about anything a cc i do not know personally does, but i think i should be able to safely assume that friends know their friends). nobody knows what a person wants from/feels about another person except for that individual themselves, and i actually think it's kind of invasive to make these broad negative statements on literal threads of "evidence" like "this person hates this person because of xyz! i didn't hear it from them, but i saw one thing that made me think it's true!". the ineffable truth of the matter is that despite how we all might feel about dream or quackity (or how they feel about each other), dream and quackity know each other better than us fans ever will. it is common curtesy to not enforce our own opinions onto other people, because it's common curtesy to not try to control other people - just as it's common curtesy to not try to tell an artist what their own intentions were (though i appreciate the concern). 
in conclusion, i want to provide an apology if the piece made you (the reader, if you got this far...?!?) feel uncomfortable towards me or my art. it's never been in my interests to unsettle/shock people, and i'm genuinely sorry if i unintentionally made you feel that way. honestly, i don't see myself being suuuuuper open to further discussion of this matter (because i think it's rather trivial in the grand scheme of things), but if you would like to chat for a bit my dms are open. 
i also want to say thank you to all those qrters (like honestly) for getting me to stretch my critical thinking muscles and write all this out! i know the general reaction to this is probably "im not reading all that" to which i say "well i didn't read any of the qrts either cus i muted the tweet like ages ago so we're at a stalemate arent we!" everyone wins here :•) 
-koji
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clown-cult · 2 years
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Your last ask kind of bothers me, because the whole premise of the Shiina manga is that two of the protags were created through child grooming. It doesn't matter if you pirate it or not, you're just prioritizing the "official" content even though it's presented right alongside the OOC gross SR stuff. I get loving InuKag, but what's the difference between something official and a doujinshi anyway? Just the creators getting to make money off the brand. If Shiina wasn't doing the manga in partnership with the owners of the Inuyasha brand, you wouldn't take a second look at it because it's no better than the middling fanfiction written on AO3. But because it's "official" you're drooling all over it and willing to ignore all the context surrounding it?
Why don't you just go and find a good InuKag fan artist that doesn't support SR and support them instead?
This is going to be a very long and rambling post as I try to make my thoughts clear. on both this ask and the ask I got previously.
First of all, I myself don’t ship InuKag. I know, that’s basically blasphemy in this fandom, but I don’t. So if you’re trying to come for me personally anon, don’t bother.
With that out of the way, I was trying to offer an alternative to that particular anon. Some people can enjoy fan content but still prioritise canon content of their ships (even when it comes to something non-canon like Yashahime and even less canon still when it comes to the manga) just out of a desire to want to know what happens next. I don’t see quite as much with western media but there’s something about the culture of the anime and manga industry and how there’s almost always new merch being released of some sort that basically primes the consumer to want more, even when a series is long finished.
Then again, some people are just fandom purists and feel safer with content that has some semblance of official status. Remember that the iceberg that is Yashahime only hit the Inuyasha fandom relatively recently and a lot of people are still hurt, confused and trying to seperate being able to enjoy the original work without having to also support the sequel and, more importantly, creators who allowed this to happen even if it isn’t canon. The Harry Potter fandom is proof that you can completely separate the work from the author and their problematic decisions and still enjoy the work itself, but as I said, the Inuyasha fandom is still collecting itself from the fallout.
As for me, I like InuKik and SessKik and I will always heavily support queer ships over straight ones. I’m in no way dismissing your point of supporting fan content and fan creators bc there’s literally no chance I’m going to get any content at all if it’s not fanmade, and I create fan content myself to continue that goal onwards. Many of us are already going the route that Harry Potter took and are contributing more of our own content that completely separates off the distressing elements introduced to the fandom. I’m pretty sure people will come around as it’s already happening, but in the meantime I’m trying to be understanding of how upset communities like InuKag and MirSan will still be.
In the meantime, in regards to said spinoff that’s being made about the newlywed couples, while I’ve recommended pirating as the best way to enjoy it without financially supporting it, I do want to warn people at the same time. Remember this is still a Yashahime-centric project. I understand that previous anon loves InuKag and wants more of them, but look at his InuKag has been treated by Yashahime so far. Not only are they no longer the heart of the narrative, they’re reduced to a bastardised version of the original that allows and fawns over Sesshomaru’s violation of Rin, and then said bastardised version we’re left with is all but absent from the story.
To previous anon, I understand being comfortable with more ‘official’-ish content and as I said, if you must look at it then don’t financially contribute to it, but remember that this is not a series that has been kind to, understood or valued InuKag. The only reason this series is being made, I said some time ago, is because it’s attempting to use InuKag as a cover to try and push the SessRin narrative more. As current anon is pointing out, any new content with InuKag is going to be stained by SR and the context around the sequel.
There’s no shortage of InuKag events that have happened this year and plenty of master posts of good content. I think I saw somewhere that’s there’s a zine in the works. I can’t tell you how to spend your time or money on the internet, but if it was me, I’d be supporting fan comics and doujinshis, instead of official-but-not content that doesn’t treat my OTP fairly. Just something to think about.
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nataliefay97 · 3 months
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Final Blog Post: Youth Creativity Hub
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Our youth creative media project is finally up and running. Choosing TikTok as our platform was a game-changer, and we've already garnered a couple of hundred views, a comment, and a follower! The engagement so far seems to be from young people as well, which is promising.
Initially, our idea was to create a website for a digital art gallery where youth could submit their artworks to be published. As child and youth care practitioners who are advocates for mental health are wellbeing, our overarching goal of this project was to encourage creative expression among youth which (we hope) would lead to the promotion well-being in our participants and audience. Additionally, we wanted the youth who engaged with our project to feel like they were part of something, and to connect with their peers through art. Community is so important when it comes to mental well-being.
However, unlike a website, TikTok provides us real-time insights into audience engagement, allowing us to connect with our viewers more dynamically. We also expanded our reach by creating a Linktree page featuring mental health resources and a curated playlist, ensuring our project serves as both a creative outlet and a supportive space for youth. We want to encourage not just creative expression, but youth media creation, as the only other way to engage with our content other than liking/commenting would be to film themselves and their creative works and upload them using our suggested hashtags. Our readings from week 10 discussed the importance of youth media creation and the roles it serves for youth (Fisherkeller, 2021). Additionally, this project places youth as not just consumer but creators of media and media culture, as we encourage youth to creatively “respond” to our challenges and art activities with their own trials and creations (Aarsand, 2021). This project can perhaps also contribute to new media literacies as we thoroughly discussed in this class, encouraging skill development and engagement with physical artistic media and digital media on TikTok (Jenkins, 2006).
The transition to TikTok, however, presented its own set of challenges. What seemed like a straightforward process of filming a couple of art tutorials turned into a meticulous undertaking for me, personally. I was forced to creatively problem-solve as a result of my lack of equipment and recent experience with filming and video editing. I was able to make a makeshift tripod using stacks of books and dishes, and balancing my poor phone on the edges of shelves to give the viewer a “birds-eye view” of what my hands were doing. Each TikTok required 45 minutes of filming at least! I faced technical challenges such as my lighting being too yellow and too harsh, realizing unwanted elements in the frame only after I had finished filming, and realizing that what I was drawing on paper wasn’t even showing up on camera and having to re-do everything all over again. Also, I had to plan out scripts for the TikToks and jot down which camera angle I would use for each line of script I wrote. The planning was extensive but I enjoyed the challenge!
Decisions about whether to include my voice or film myself added another layer of complexity. Struggling with camera shyness and apprehensions about potential criticism about my appearance (not that there I'm anything particularly notable about how I look…it’s just that TikTok can make you feel insecure about things you never thought about before!), I opted to keep the focus solely on the art for now.
In terms of my role in this project, I believe I took on several key responsibilities that laid the foundation for Youth Creativity Hub. I was responsible in conceiving the initial idea that led to the creation of this project. I feel my partner and I were able to collaborate seamlessly as she was enthusiastic and on-board with the ideas I put forward. I also named our project. I believe “Youth Creativity Hub” is fitting because it represents the demographic we wish to reach and also encompasses our commitment to serving as a central hub for art tutorials and a safe space for creative exploration. I also created 3 engaging TikTok videos which entailed two art activities and one mindfulness activity. Further, I created and set up our TikTok account and made sure to draft meaningful and engaging captions for the videos I uploaded with appropriate hashtags. Finally, I used Canva to design our logo which unifies our brand.
Through this project, I was able to re-discover the joy of creating videos again, a hobby I had set aside for about 10 years (I initially wanted to pursue a career in digital media before I chose child and youth care). I used to “mess around” and film and edit videos when I was a teen, and eventually started “geeking out” once I started my (now deleted) YouTube channel and built a following (Herr Stephenson, 2021). ****I initially set out to only create 2 TikToks, and I ended up creating 3. Perhaps post-semester I will explore TikTok some more and continue making videos, not just for my own enjoyment but to also to foster a community of young creators. My aspiration is that our videos will not only spark individual creativity but also nurture a supportive creative space for the youth on TikTok.
Citations
Aarsand, P. (2021). Children's Digital Gaming Cultures. In D. Lemish (Ed.) The Routledge International Handbook of Children, Adolescents, and Media (pp. 119-126), Routledge.
Fisherkeller, J. (2021). Young People Producing Media. In D. Lemish (Ed.) The Routledge International Handbook of Children, Adolescents, and Media (pp. 344-350), Routledge.
Herr Stephenson, R. (2021). New Media and Informal Learning. In D. Lemish (Ed.) The Routledge International Handbook of Children, Adolescents, and Media (pp. 467-474), Routledge.
Jenkins, H. (2006). Confronting the Challenges of Participatory Culture: Media Education for the 21st Century. An Occasional Paper on Digital Media and Learning
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hopeididntscareyou · 1 year
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Even though Liz would talk shit about me, I dont agree with everything she says. I'm not going to let other people get in the way of my relationships anymore. Listening to other peoples opinions just making me feel hateful and also making me a terrible person for being always on defensive mode. Deep down, i'm a very loyal and genuine person. I believe in true love even in this day and age where people are either manipulators and too traumatized to trust others. I am someone who would go lengths to show how i care about someone without losing myself. I dont care about all these labels and games that people play. As long as I stay healthy mentally, emotionally and physically, then nothing can destroy me. I only follow my own philosophy.
I find it saddening how people would believe whatever bullshit they see on tiktok/youtube rather than learning things from real life experience. People need to understand that these content creators are mainly trying to make money. They have that goal thats why they stir drama from reddit or 4chan extremists. Their ideas dont reflect the entire population IRL. They make money by grabbing your attention, brainwashing you and being their followers. Don't you see how out of touch with reality that looks like? if that doesn't sound crazy and cult-like to you, then i don't know what to tell you. I admit though, I was also a victim of this for awhile, but in my entire life I realized, the only times I have really learned about life was from my own experiences, and going outside and engaging with people who are passionate about their work that they dont even have time for the internet- usually older people from all walks of life. Thats where I got real wisdom. Its never really been from the internet. The thing is you could spend your precious time consuming self improvement material from youtube or reddit and even a book but it wouldn't actually improve your life whatsoever because you spent your time being a follower of someone else's ideas than having your own path. To be honest, all self improvement books/videos I've seen are just mostly common sense that I already knew and had been doing because I came up with these ideas on my own. It's really not that hard to give yourself a quiet time to sit and think solutions for your own problems. I believe it is more important to create more than to consume. Nowadays, internet is full of retarded and braindead people wired by quick dopamine. Its not the same as early 2000s and mid 2010s where internet stuff was obscure. Its been decades since the invention of the internet. It is not the age of the internet anymore but the age of algorithm. I stopped consuming internet as much as possible because of two things; one - the internet is full of fake news, misinformation and propagandas. Two - it is the source of distraction with its unlimited entertainment. I only use internet as an online tool for conveniency to keep up with the digital world; mainly using google maps, QR codes, storage, work or legit educational priorities.
And honestly, i can tell a lot about person based on their internet activities that its probably my main criteria now when judging a person as first impression. If you're a person who doom scrolls on short videos/reels regardless of the content, then I would assume you spend your spare time as a consumer than a creator and that alone would tell me what kind of person you are.
In an unrelated note, I'm still coming into terms about my sexuality because I can't quite figure out if i am really indeed an asexual or not. I feel extremely grossed out with the idea of sex with people I have a romantic relationship with. It just feels so wrong, like it makes me feel like i'm engaging in incest kind of wrong to me. I do however like sharing intimate moments and romance like hugging touching cuddling and kissing but sex is just repulsive and disgusting to me. I think its partly because of my trauma from watching depraved and disturbing porn for sickfucks, that definitely is a fact. But i also should admit that I have been sexually attracted before and I would consider myself as sexually active because I masturbate an average of 3x a week to 5x in just one day. The problem arise whenever I'm dating/seeing someone because i completely lose my interest in anything sexual all of a sudden and I would even stop masturbating. I don't know, its fucking weird. I cant count how many times i forced myself to be in the mood while someone is kissing me and touching me, but it just doesn't work, and I hate that when that happens because it makes me hate sex entirely and apathetic with someone. Like i don't even care if my partner would do it with other women just because he cant have sex with me. I literally don't care. Honestly, I am not really a jealous person and I can handle things well as long as I'm not bored. Sex is not a massive issue to me entirely at all. Fortunately i never had a problem about this with most guys except one time. But in general, the guys i chose to date were good natured individuals that i shared the same values with. So contrary to the popular belief, no I am not a raging feminazi who hates men. Thats incorrect and its funny how my friends would say i hate men just because i don't put up with trashy behaviors. You'd think people who are close to me would know me better, but surprise surprise. Sometimes its just not really easy to get to know someone on a deeper level. You could know someone for years without knowing anything about them. Not all people are open books, and honestly I dont care enough to change how people perceive me. You can think whatever you want about me and I'm still going to live my reality
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beachblu3s · 3 years
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It’s K o u time
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nabrizoya · 3 years
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honestly would LOVE to hear your thoughts on the nikolai duology because i really only see blanket praise or blanket hate for it whereas I see a lot of wasted potential. Bardugo's actual writing was beautiful as ever for the most part, but the choice of the plot/beats feels baffling to me. I love Nina, but her parts felt so separate from the rest of the book until the very end, and even that felt off. I liked the first 2/3 of KoS enough, dealing with the monster, political tensions, 1/2
and even the cult of the starless saint was at least interesting because dealing with people trying to rewrite the narrative of their greatest enemy (who hurt these young leaders in deeply PERSONAL ways) was really compelling (making him literally come back was. a choice) but I feel like somewhere in the last third, KoS went in a wholly differeent direction, and RoW has this vibe of feeling like she definitely wrote it after reading the show scripts or even seeing some footage. idk. 2/2
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I will try to be brief (1/12)
Hey anon! Thank you so much for asking this even though it took 38756588247834 years to answer this I’m so sorry !! The Nikolai duology was good—wonderful too maybe because of the myriad of themes and topics it discussed and explored, all in addition to how beloved these characters are. For me, it’s the end of KoS as it is for you, and the entirety of RoW in particular that irk me the most.
I have very little issue with KoS, and I agree with everything you’ve said. The political tensions, the sort of urgency in trying to secure a country at the cost of personal reservations, preparing for a war that seems unforgivably near the door, etc. was all thrilling. After all, it is the first installment in the duology, and it’s supposed to set the course for the upcoming books.
KoS managed to introduce the stakes and the circumstances, lay the rails for what the characters will face and what it might mean to a vast set of entities connected to the events. And it’s hardly out of sense to expect Rule of Wolves to pick up where the previous book left off and carry forward the themes and plot points introduced in the first book.
Except, RoW failed spectacularly in that aspect.
Rule of Wolves: the second book, and the supposed finale to the Grishaverse and the Nikolai duology; it fails to continue the other number of threads that KoS set up for it, effectively compromising the characters, their characterizations, the themes and other political tensions and stakes. The due importance that should be given to the heavy set of topics that get brought up in the povs are not through, nor are the small details that Leigh added to the conversations evolve into something worth talking about, which are the actual points that could have been given some more page time to explore than just making them facts or points of nostalgia for the characters.
If you take a step back and analyze the whole timeline, events, characterization, objectives of the arcs and the plot points etc. etc., all the way from Crooked Kingdom to Rule of Wolves, there’s so much that is left out and tied in, quite haphazardly, which leads me to believe that Leigh wanted to attempt writing a duology that is more plot-driven than it is character driven. And we know that Leigh writes character driven stories brilliantly, and SoC, CK and TLoT are testament to the same. Heck, even TGT has more consistency than whatever TND has.
So, objectively? Plot possibilities? Characterization? Potential? Personal goals? Addressing the very serious themes it brought up, in little or major light, but give no proper elaboration about them?
The lost potential readily compromised the characterizations of many characters, and it all amounted to their arcs being very underwhelming.
I’m dividing this into four parts and here’s the basic outline.
Writing and Plotting
The Plot, Possibilities and Potential.
Characters, Characterization, Character Potential.
Remedy (what I think would've worked better to tie this all up)
This can get very looong, so be forewarned.
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I. Writing & Plotting
Now, Leigh Bardugo’s writing is exceptional, no doubt. The sentences are short and flowy, and convey the tone, psyche, environment and the setting and its effects on the pov character marvellously. It's also immersive. It’s the same in Rule of Wolves, except, a little or a lot weaker.
The two main parts of this is that one, that Leigh slightly overdid showing a lot more than telling, and two, that the RoW (and perhaps KoS too), was more plot driven than character driven, the latter of which is actually Leigh’s strength.
In Rule of Wolves, Leigh’s writing seemed very choppy and snappish. The descriptions were lacking, or maybe that’s just me wishing for more internal conflict and dilemma, and going back and forth in one's own head for a bit. It felt like she showed more than she told.
Example being how Zoya ‘snaps’, ‘drawls’, ‘scoffs’, or ‘scowls’ less, and even if that’s supposed to be show Zoya beginning to be a little less unpleasant than she usually is, the tone in those chapters was not strong enough to distinguish how and why the character was acting a certain way. Nor pinpoint an explanation on what brought that change about. (And there were many instances like this with many other characters), which resulted in the characters themselves feeling so off to me.
Leigh’s characters are important to the story. They carry tremendous weight and actively contribute to the plot. Except, by focusing a lot more on the plot, some parts of these characters’ relevance was not up to the mark. It is greatly due to how weak the plotting and pacing of the book was, tbh, more than just her writing.
Consider: Mayu Kir Kaat. She is integral to the story, but she is thrust into responsibilities, and that doesn’t give us much time to see her as a person, and then as a person with a duty, like we see with most other characters. Whatever parts of her we did see were very circumstantial and timed, which is probably the reason why not many we’re unable to appreciate Mayu as much as we should. (Maybe fandom racism also plays a part, so, well,,,).
Like, we know from Six of Crows and with The Language of Thorns, how great care went into describing the characters’ state of mind, which further heavily influenced their choices and decisions. This time though, I think she wanted it to be more plot driven, hence the whole crowded feeling of the book and general worry about oh my god too much is happening, how will all this be solved and all that.
And this, I think, greatly hampered Leigh's writing, leading to unsettling and rather unsatisfying character arcs. Not to mention that there was quite little space given for the characters to develop or let them grow in a satisfying way which touches on most of the elements and themes that get brought up with regard to their powers and potential,,, and when it was indeed brought up, it was all in vain since they were never followed through.
That's one of the biggest problems for me in RoW: Plot points brought up in KoS were not brought forward in RoW.
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II. The Plot, Possibilities and Potential.
Phew. Truly buckle up because this train has too many coaches. And to discuss them all, let’s keep the starting point as Crooked Kingdom.
a) Parem
Now, by the end of Crooked Kingdom, we know some important things about the parem.
It's dangerous asf for the Grisha who have to sacrifice their will and capabilities for a short time superpower high that they didn’t even ask for
Which means they are more often than not forced to consume the drug
Shu Han is the creator of the Parem and are also creating a new kind of soldiers called Khergud (who additionally require Ruthenium, but we’ll talk abt that later)
Fjerda snatched the formula after kidnapping Bo Yul-Bayur, keeping him away in the Ice Court and in their possession, and used the Parem to further their own heedlessly heinous agenda
I think it’s easy to understand how KoS started off on the right track, considering that Kuwei Yul Bo is mentioned, the antidote and jurda is brought up and so come the political tensions alongside it (what with the impending war, the demon, the lack of funds in the coffers and security and peace for the country alongside safety for the Grisha).
The point is, parem is a character of its own. CK was its inception, and its fate was decreed along with its lifespan and its doom. Ideally, by the end of RoW, parem should have been vanquished while addressing its nature as a deadly drug, the addiction and aftermath, and the key person who will guide the plot: Kuwei Yul Bo.
Parem is a political tool that pitted countries against each other, making one another their allies or enemies. (Though parem is not the only one factor). Ravka doesn’t yet know about Kerch’s neutrality. The Shu made their move to assassinate in the end, just as Fjerda cleared the air about their goals.
Point is, parem is weapon, a new kind of warfare that keeps getting alluded to in KoS. The first book gave a glimpse of how the Shu and Fjerda are using parem, thereby exploiting, prejudicing etc. the Grisha in their countries. Khergud whose humanity is washed away with parem + ruthenium, and the Fjerdan Grisha (are targeted) drugged and exploited while be subjected to torture, training and imminent death, parametres of these outcomes being severely gendered.
Ravka too wanted to weaponize it and create a usable strain that would still give the Grisha their powers but at a minimal cost, until Nikolai’s conversation with Grigori convinces him out of it and to use only the antidote for the Grisha.
And when are the contents of this conversation brought up again?
Never.
Another aspect of parem (that the conversation also covers) is this: that what was once merzost, parem is its strange cousin. Parem parallels breaking the bounds of Grisha norms unnaturally, while merzost takes it a step further to break the bounds of nature itself, which comes with a heavy price. They're both the same with little differences. Amplifiers are in tune with this discussion, hence the conversation between Zoya and Nikolai about how, and whether or not the abomination in him, the parem, and the amplifiers are tied together. This gets brought up again in the conversation with Grigori.
Parem parallels the superpowers, something that Zoya too manages to achieve once the corruption of the amplifier business is resolved, which makes her realize how in tune with nature the Grisha must be, and how limited the Grisha powers until then had been. And why the amplifiers were a corrupted piece of magic.
Zoya was supposed to be the conduit in that sense that she reversed the Grisha norms and understood the importance and nature of small science. This is alongisde parem getting abolished or resolved in the least, be given a redressal.
Yet instead in RoW, we barely see any of Zoya’s powers, nor even her experimentation and hunger for power which would give her protection. We don't see how she begins to realize that while power was indeed protection, it was also a responsibility. Not clearly, anyway.
So like, not only is this entire discussion thrown away in Rule of Wolves, but no matters are resolved either. Parem did not reach its end like it was supposed to. Merzost with regard to parem would have been an excellent thing to address, with or without the Darkling being present, because the blight is there. But that doesn’t happen.
What happens instead? We get one chapter of Grisha getting the antidote during the face off at the start of the book, the women in Fjerda are not brought up again and instead we jump to Shu Han. Kuwei is also conveniently forgotten because hey, the Zemeni are here so it’s all sorted!
RoW could have (should have actually) sought to address both the political and medical (?) aftermath and implications. Maybe it did succeed in showing the political side of it, with regard to Mayu, Ehri, Makhi and Tamar’s storylines. But that’s only in Shu Han, whose state of affairs we had NO idea of until RoW. No idea, so much that it was completely out of the blue.
And what we did know (get to know about in KoS) is Fjerda and the affairs there remained… unsolved.
(...sorry).
b) Grisha Powers
Re: From the conversation between Nikolai and Grigori, and Juris and Zoya, about how parem and the amplifiers are parallel to each other in terms of being abominations, a corruption of Grisha powers. Now the theory of it is not entirely explained, but we do know that the parem and whatever Zoya learnt from Juris was meant to move along in the same direction.
But we don't see another mention of it, except maybe we could dig a little deeper and realize that it all adds up because Zoya is the Grisha Queen of Ravka, Summoner, Soldier, Saint, all of it rushed and unnecessarily magical in a war so dire and realistic in RoW.
Welp.
c) Spy business
Just… genuinely what even was Nina up to in RoW? A spy, sure, but only to garner information on the pretender?
Why couldn’t there have been two responsibilities for her to uncover: the lies or truths about the pretender while the Apparat causes hindrances, and Nina trying to seek out more documents of the locations and labs where the Grisha women are being tormented and the other Grisha being weaponized? It could have been a leverage to discredit Fjerda in front of everybody in the Os Kervo scene. Imagine if Nina whipped out the documents of Grisha labs and brought the truth of the exploitation and killing and kidnapping etc. in front of the convention of all nations. All of it together would have upped the political tensions by quite the notch.
Even then, there’s a possibility that it wouldn’t matter either because the Grisha aren’t exactly valuable to all the nations. But killing and exploiting is still wrong so maybe it might have worked? Or see, even if it wouldn’t have, the slow and sluggish realization of Mila’s identity by Brum, and alongside writing it as a tragedy where Nina’s efforts seem to have gone to waste, or where Nina is telling Zoya about not accounting for Prince Rasmus’ word and she informs her about the documents she has snatched? Something could have been done here?
The point is, KoS focused on Fjerda and its unraveling, and it wasn’t continued with and through in Rule of Wolves. Instead it sought to find the problem in a whole new country, Shu Han, and fixed it within the same book leaving the other country as it is.
d) Ruthenium and the Blight
Ruthenium, the metal that is an alloy of regular metal and Grisha made steel, could have been utilized more significantly in the books.
I mention it in association with the blight because while on one hand it is true that the blight is an area full of nothingness, ruthenium as a metal could have been utilized to show the effects of rushed industrialization that is leading to the ground losing its essence. This is supposed to be advanced warfare after all. Besides, Makhi loses someone very dear to her. Perhaps ruthenium is more dangerous in Shu Han because the Shu use it to create the khergud, so the constant manufacturing of it has been leading to the metal leeching the lands of their fertility, along with the blight.
And so also to broker peace, Ravka could have provided aid in some ways. :
1) The Darkling sacrificed himself, as a result of which the blight vanishes. While the blight took away her niece, the possibility of a blight persisting despite the ending of RoW could be attributed to ruthenium.
2) Ravka could provide the reversing effect to the alloy of ruthenium and metal using Grisha and otkazt’sya engineering and ingenuity to replenish the lands.
All in addition to whatever will be Shu Han’s policies to bring lushness to their lands.
e) Women and War:
Holy fucking Shit, where do I start with this?
Whatever we saw in Fjerda was haunting, and we see it from Nina’s chapters. There’s literally no resolution for it, nor is it ever brought up again, at all. In Zoya’s chapters, we see through her eyes the brunt that Grisha faced with the war, and in a country that has refused to recognize Grisha as the citizens and considers them expendable.
Add to it her own narrative of how the women are never mentioned, let alone the ones that she has lost or has known to suffer, at the hands of the war, at the Darkling's torture and powers. The description of these women suffering, often being forgotten and thrown aside as mere casualties… where or when was it ever going to be brought up again?
Like, switching between such horrifying things happening in Fjerda to whatever was happening with Zoya and Nikolai and Isaak is such a contrast, horrifyingly demeaning and insulting, even more so when it failed to align with the importance of parem and offer a solution to both these problems.
Now switch to Rule of Wolves, where the Tavgahard women immolate themselves on Queen Makhi’s orders. Not only is that such a cheap and insensitive thing to do, it gets treated a simple fucking plot point in the book, and it barely gets addressed afterwards. Women in Asia have a vastly complex and complicated history with fire, and this is a serious criticism that culturally affects readers in personal ways. And what gets done about it? Fine, Zoya feels baaaad, sorry oops why would the women do that?!?!?
Where is the adequate sensitivity to the topic? Where is the continuation of the pain Zoya feels for many people, despite them being the enemy? How does she honour them? Where is all that dilemma and pain? Why does she not think of them or just get a line or two to talk about them?
Where is the due importance for this suffering given? Structurally and culturally?
f) Soldier, Summoner, Saint / Yaromir the Great
We never really get any explanation for why Zoya deserves to be the Queen, and why she is the best. But we do get to see why Nikolai isn’t the one supposed to be on the throne, and it’s not just because of his parentage but also because of his failings and doubts and the need for acceptance with the secrets he carried.
Here's the thing though; it’s not just about her showing mercy. It’s very subtle, and in good sense, should actually have been given a little bit more importance that be loosely brought up at random times.
Keeping aside the fact that Zoya is representative of Ravka—a woman, a Grisha, a Suli girl who changed the course of war and who knew what it was like living in poverty, being as an underprivileged person of the society in addition to the trauma from then and the state of living at her aunt’s place—which is meant to be covertly apparent, the other reason tracks back to Yaromir the First, who with the help of Sankt Feliks of the Apple Boughs—the one who raised the thornwood—lead Ravka at that time into the age of peace.
The Darkling testified that in his POVs, that while Feliks and Yaromir worked in tandem for Ravka, Aleksander worked for safeguarding the Grisha. In one sense, Zoya is supposed to reflect that moment in history in the present moment, except she is Queen and Sankta, and Grisha, all three at once.
It is brought up in one of the Darkling’s POVs and once in the conversation with Yuri in KoS. Other than that, we never actually get any more hints of this explanation in the text, which is the reason why the entire ending felt so so rushed, and like a fever dream, that even if it was a plot twist, it was kinda very baseless when it should have been more ohhhhh sort of a thing.
g) The Starless Cult and Saint Worship
This cult had immense potential to blossom into many things, some of which were indeed touched upon in KoS when Zoya says that she saw a bit of herself in Yuri, and brings up time and again how easily she’d been led and had not been aware enough of what’s right and wrong, just as she supposes Yuri is too. And to some extent, there is truth there, because in the Lives of Saints, we do see why Yrui comes about to hail the Darkling and how it parallels Zoya’s, of being helpless and ten being saved by a different power/ their own power, respectively.
That’s where it forks, that Zoya is older and realizes the path that Yuri has chosen and understands that it won't happen until he realizes it himself because the Darkling’s crimes are so obvious.
Even then, there’s still more potential: This cult could have been the mirror that would make Zoya reflect on the questionable methods of the Darkling, and the ways in which she might be mirroring them, despite or not it is the necessity because of the war. How she is training soldiers too, just as the Darkling did, and while the need to take children away from their homes just as soon as they were discovered Grisha was abolished, it was war, and they needed soldiers.
So like, there’s quite a big narrative going on here, how mere children are pushed into one path of becoming a soldier and the whole system that was that the Darkling followed to train the Grisha and all of that. All of this in addition to the juxtaposition to the Grisha being seen as elite despite them being hunted, and the people who are not Grisha frowning upon them. This is also the work of the Darkling, which actually paves the way to see how there can be a world where the Grisha are not feared or seen as abnormal, despite or not they are given a Saint-like narrative.
This cult could also have been the segue to discussing Yuri and his brainwashing, and the sort of cult-ish behaviour of believing in something firm when you couldn’t believe in yourself, or not seeing the magnitude of the crimes of their supposed Saint, alongside always staying focused on becoming a soldier only and never actually thinking beyond what is told.
Some of these are very subtle and some are brought up, but never given too much of an explanation.
Genya brings up another good point in the funeral chapter, about how Fjerda seemingly taking into the whole Saints thing could mean that if the Darkling moved there, he could very well sprawl his influence there to bring in supporters. Which leads to another discussion that gets brought up towards the end of the book: about Nina telling about the Ravkan Saints to Hanne and therefore to the Fjerdans,,, which doesn’t exactly sit right with me. It’s still a very nascent topic, and I think SoC3 will explore this path of faith and personal beliefs etc. but leaving it just there, while talking so much about Saints in both the countries,,, don’t exactly know how to put it into thoughts here.
But regardless, the cult of the Starless had different potential to talk of (blind) worshipping of an ideal without critically examining why the person must be put on the pedestal in the first place (and if it is simply power, then there is actually a narrative right there, which RoW gets right, about the people valuing the power still, as a result of which the monarchy still persists at the end of RoW. Even then, there’s more discussion awaiting there).
Not sure if any of this makes sense, but I’ll leave it at this here for now.
edit: 05/07/2021 | I think what I was trying to say here is that we do not have any kind of narrative evidence to seeing how and why it seems right that the Fjerdans will worship Ravkan Saints; is it merely because they are all Grisha? Or is it because of the segue explore this path of faith and personal beliefs and all of that, of the talk of the monastery and the Grisha there being of all identities, that a monastery is in Shu Han, that it has Djel's sacred Ash tree so far away from Fjerda... much to think about.
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III. Characters, Characterization, Character Potential.
Mostly going to be about Nina and Zoya, but I’ll bunch up the rest of them at the end.
a) Nina
*head in hands*
I severely mourned how poorly Zoya was written in RoW, but then I realized that more than Zoya, it’s Nina whose potential was severely undermined and wasted. On one hand, I’m glad she uses her powers and quick thinking,observation and her own tactics to analyze the population and opt for the best way to make them see the truth she wants to show them (eg: making Leoni and Adrik and Zoya saints and also showing that the Grisha are the children of Djel via people’s belief to Joran and Rasmus’s mother).
But then, it’s like you said; her parts were so offbeat and outpaced and completely disjointed, when in fact, Nina is the thread that ties all the characters, their plotlines and potential, together. Nina is connected to Zoya and Hanne, two equally important characters and main characters of the duology. Whatever scope Nina has, they are greatly in parallel to Zoya and Hanne. And it’s all literally there, in the text! What a waste.
Though keeping aside these parallels, Nina’s own journey from Ketterdam to Ravka to Fjerda, while is spoken about, doesn’t touch some other parts that I see potential in. Or this is just meta.
Nina has grief not just from Matthias’ death but also from the loss of her powers as Heartrender. So much of the Second Army was built on being a soldier, and perhaps the Darkling was not outright disdainful of racial differences in his army, yet he still stripped every part of the children away until they weren’t children anymore in his view. They’re all soldiers… (albeit his soldiers, preparing them to do his bidding because hey, give and take right?). Nina was a soldier, and she is a soldier still under Zoya’s role as a General, but an ‘other’ of a soldier. That’s her only identity, and the loss of her powers means that she’s a different kind of soldier.
I imagine that this entire time, some small part of Nina longed for normalcy, or whatever settled as normal for a life like hers. In the sense that she wants to go back, but what is back and where exactly did she want to go back to? What was the before and after and where did things go wrong or change? There’s tragedy in the realization that whatever you were before what you became is not a place you can return to, and that’s a different kind of loss that she has to bear, and all by herself. She has powers over the dead now, a strange power she learns to grow to, but all the places she has been, all the lives she has led and people she had been, everything might seem like they’ve all been locked away in some strange place leaving her barren and indisposable.
She’s off to Fjerda as someone she isn’t, figuratively and literally. In KoS, Nina brings up many times how odd she feels as Mila and in some capacity longs to be Nina Zenik again. This ties in with the previous point of returning to somewhere, but where?, but is also a segue towards body dysmorphia, the thing that Nina and Hanne’s storylines parallel and connect too with in a small way. It’s a great line to follow to discuss what her discomfort with her body means to herself while it means something entirely different to Hanne, who is also not entirely comfortable being who they are. (This discomfort further which leads to gender dysphoria, while for Nina, it will be about learning to accept her powers. I’ll add on to this in a bit,).
I'm mourning the lost potential of that experience being a parallel to Hanne’s own feelings, of a discussion between people being uncomfortable with their bodies, something that can mean multitudes to each person and on their own accord.
In parallel to Zoya, I like to draw it from the fact about Nina wanting to go back to who she was, while Zoya actively tries to lock her past away and drown it somewhere or throw it to the storm, never to hear of it again. She has no identity other than being a soldier, and that’s enough for Zoya, because who she was before she was a soldier is not pleasant. But moving from being just another expendable shell of soldier under the Darkling’s rule, Zoya becomes the one third of the Triumvirate, and then the King’s general, all of which bring self-awareness of Zoya’s capabilities and challenges that are bound to excite her. But all of these also compel Zoya to be many other people to others as she slowly grows to realize that power is not just protection but also a responsibility, and it will inadvertently mean confronting her past of her lost identity, realizing the how of the Darkling, and how harmful it was. As Genya puts it perfectly in Rule of Wolves, that they were all taken away when they were young kids, not even barely children, and then thrust into responsibilities that didn’t allow them to be anything else other than what the Darkling told them to be.
Back to Nina; a few other great parts about Nina’s arc could have been about her connection to languages, as language being a mode of strengthening identity, in addition to growing to her powers. In RoW, there’s this line that goes ‘how sweet it was to speak her language [Ravkan] again’, and the feeling of homesickness. Like, Nina is trying to connect to Ravka through what she knows best—language, and then stories. In that, Nina realizes a part of her identity, which could also act as a segue to Zoya reclaiming her own heritage and ethnicity. Not only that but Zoya and Nina’s stories are literally so intertwined that it’s hard not to see how their choices and line of thought affect one another’s arcs, in the grief they have and how they choose to treat it, and also show why Zoya is particularly protective of Nina (and keeps wishing that she doesn’t become the monster Zoya had become, in the sense that Nina is more mature in handling her grief than Zoya was and the entire mercy plotline ties Nina, Zoya and even Genya together. More meta, haH).
And that’s why the ending doesn’t make sense. Even though the part about her not being comfortable as Mila is not brought up many times in the continuing chapters (and that’s why perhaps naming Nina’s discomfort as body dysmorphia may be wrong), there’s still the part of Nina readily accepting to be who she was a Mila and remain in Fjerda that seems iffy to me. Especially when Nina and Hanne literally a few chapters ago think about running away (it may be just another alternative they might be fantasizing about, but I think it still means that they both want to be their true selves without hiding any parts of it away). So her staying as Mila… well, it doesn’t exactly add up.
I’d also add the part of Nina’s story mirroring Leoni’s, and how she is from Novyi Zem and being a part of the Second Army meant that she had little to no connection with her past, her culture etc. But maybe that’s just wishful thinking on my part that Leigh went for that arc.
edit: 05/07/2021 | I don't agree with my point anymore about Nina not having the kind of ending I assumed she might have, considering that it is very well possible for Nina to treat her identity as Mila as a fresh start, as a Grisha with a command over the the dead and begin a new normal that is suited for her. You can read more here.
b) Zoya
For one, white passing Zoya is not canon to me. I simply pretend I do not see it.
See, her race was handled very badly. Making her half-Suli was supposed to show the struggles and the trauma that the ridiculing of her identity by other people has caused to her. Except, not enough time nor text is given to thoroughly discuss it. Not to forget how problematic of a narrative in itself it is to make Zoya white passing.
It would have made more sense to make her dark skinned and predominantly Suli-looking than whatever yt bs she was put through. Her not being white-passing would have led to conversations about tokenization, or people caring little about her and not giving her any respect because she is Suli. Or being called beautiful to the face and praised just for it or a harmless tumble in their point of view.
So like, instead of making the ‘mistake’ of seeking for acceptance, seeking appreciation and love, from her mother at first and then the Darkling, Zoya instead makes herself someone to be feared, if respect was not what she deserved. The iciness is a part of her and has always been, but all of it soon became a shield, an armour that she vowed to harden her heart with. Just the sheer impact of this narrative and her reluctance, and seeing Nikolai love her for beyond who she thinks she is… if all of this was canon, I’m pretty sure I’d have built a shrine for this duology.
Let’s now talk about her grief, and...
Okay it’s not for me to point fingers at how Leigh chose to write about grief because there’s no one way or one proper approach to go through that pain, and if that’s how she chose to write about grief for Zoya, fine! But I really wish we’d have gotten a little more into her head to see how the trauma has affected her thoughts and how she struggles against why and what exactly it is that Juris wants her to do. That enough time and text was dedicated to Zoya’s feelings and the mayhem it caused her, as a result of which the dragon’s eye took its cue and made things more unbearable to her because she was the only one to bear them all.
Like, I feel like Zoya was overwhelmed throughout the book and in between she had some skyhigh responsibilities to discharge and it’s all so inconsistent and poorly woven,,, it completely dissolved her character from KoS and made it 10000000x more miserable for me to read her POVs. And honestly, what even were her assignments that the Kirkus review mentioned? Never an inch of text in RoW is given to decipher her complications of her mind, the muddled sense of hopelessness and fear that grips her time and again. Why overwhelm her so much that you fail to do her mental state and capacity any justice?
I’m not going to be harsh about how much David’s death bothered me-- no actually fuck that; what’s the point? Fine, he died. All because you wanted to make his death a plot device to make Zoya reconcile with loss and deal with it? Where was Genya’s grief? Literally no point of having a death in the book at all, and it didn’t even achieve anything. (I’m still trying to wrap my head around why David’s death was important and maybe if I find some straws, I’ll consider…)
There were so many other ways around it; could have brought back Lada and killed her off, or have the Darkling piss her off so badly or just. Something. Instead of whatever happened with David. I think this is too harsh and insensitive of me to say about Leigh, but still… there’s a myriad of other ways to have gone about it. Helping Zoya deal with her grief with Nikolai at her side, to understand that the rage that was fueled from her loneliness, like it had been in the past, could now be a weight that Nikolai was willing to carry with her… Helping someone with their grief, staying and choosing is also a love language you know?
So in that regard, I won’t regret saying how flat the garden scene was to me. Zoya’s lines, though tinged with grief, were so out of what I would expect KoS Zoya to say. Maybe it’s also because of how bitter I was reading about David's death, despite that part being spoiled for me.
The cost shouldn’t have been David’s death, especially not when his death too wasn’t properly handled at all, and Genya’s grief was never spared a second thought beyond bringing Titanium.
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Now let’s talk about how Out of Character Zoya was throughout the book. Her punchy attitude was missing, and even if she was warming up to her friends, we see little of the iciness she continues to retain. Another part of this is about exploring her relationships, particularly with Nikolai and her growing feelings for him. I wish we’d have seen them grapple with more of their confusion and propriety, if only for the yearning™. Besides, no matter how cute their scenes were, they were mostly (like maybe some. 70%) awful to read them, simply because it felt so odd to see Zoya be so open with Nikolai, all of a sudden.
A part of this definitely has to be the fact that we don’t know just how much time has passed between the end of KoS and the start of RoW, and we never, never see any description of they regarded their feelings for each other and how they understood it themselves. I don’t actually know how exactly I can put this into words in a manner that will make sense, but the only scenes where I appreciated Zoyalai were in the Ketterdam chapters, ONLY. The rest was… bleh lmao. Their scenes were so cute and brilliant, and if only we’d seen more of the internal conflict and had given some more time for them to practically approach their feelings but still end up in the puddle of it. If only.
Their scenes apart were the good ones, because that’s where we finally see Nikolai feeling the loss, no matter how temporary (on the verge of being permanent since it’s the war), of not having Zoya with him, of not being there with Zoya because who else would it be if it wasn’t her? Zoyalai had good scenes but they barely lived up to the mark lol. Their feelings are never thoroughly explored, nor their mental capacities.
While we’re talking about Zoyalai, let’s also talk about how lame it was for Zoya to say that Nikolai was the golden spirited hero all along, from the very start, when canonically we know Zoya had little to do with him in the earlier books, that she may have only been physically attracted to him and never saw him as more than just some guy with a responsibility to manage, and had sooooooo much distrust about him. And that it was only in the next few years of working with him and alongside did she grow to recognize his efforts and relish in the hope that he was building for Ravka, inadvertently making Zoya hopeful too.
Nope. Instead, we’ll just throw in some destiny bs that he was the one all along rather than show that the beauty of their relationship did not stem what they perceived of each other, but was instead built on strong respect and admiration for one another and their capabilities. 100% destroyed their relationship for me.
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Some good parts about Zoya’s arc in RoW was how she acknowledged her past mistakes, and the nuance that was touched upon in seeing sense in becoming a soldier from the start, that offered her a chance to be anything other than a bride. That some part of her was grateful for the Darkling for teaching her how to fight, while still keeping Genya’s words in mind about how they were mere kids, children who had only one path to traverse because the Darkling (who wanted their acceptance and loyalty) nor the Kings of the country let the Grisha be anything else other than pawns of the war. That she recognizes her mistakes as a teen and how self centred she was, that her being snotty had at times cost some peoples’ lives too. And she doesn’t take the blame all up on herself, because it’s not hers alone to bear. Super good.
Also, the way Zoya comes to view power as responsibility instead of merely as protection was something cool to read about. It’s not clear in the books, but Zoya actively tried to not be the Darkling while still continuing to build an army for the war out of necessity, and actually sharing some parts of the dream that the Darkling had for the Grisha. I can’t articulate this so perfectly, but the point is, Zoya trying to avoid becoming a tyrant like the Darkling was an active process that she was constantly trying to change, and where Zoya could not recognize her own feelings and inherent thoughts about warfare that in some ways did mirror the Darkling’s, by the end of book, Zoya is much more self-aware and conscious of herself and her power than she was at the start of the book. And this was well done.
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Now, what is up with YA and making people turn into giants or animals lol wtf. Why couldn’t we have seen Zoya use her dragon powers in a way that symbolizes the conditions of her dragon amplifier and the power of the knowledge she obtained from Juris? She is a Saint, and we’ve seen that their powers allowed them to cause ‘miracles’ and such, as we see at the start of KoS and at the end.
Why couldn’t we have seen Zoya dabble with her newfound powers and completely lose her shit in anger during the wae, only to rein back in mercy, just as someone from Fjerda begs for forgiveness since they see her then as a Saint? Adrik and Leoni used their powers in Fjerda, so having Zoya bring about a conundrum of all orders and do something about it would also have been cool, wouldn’t it? In the funeral scene we see her turn water into ice, thereby making a path for Genya. Why couldn’t we have had more exploration of the importance of the dragon’s eye and the general nausea of being overly empathetic every. damn. time? Why didn’t we get to see her powers? Why couldn’t we have seen her fail in them and realize that the reason she was not perfect was because she was trying to be strong on her own and was not relying on others and joint effort?
Her turning into a dragon was genuinely the most baffling part bc here’s a war that’s so serious and dire with metals and bombs, and then here’s this magic that will solve all of it entirely. Like I’m not saying it was bad, (I am actually saying just that) but I also don’t know what I am saying, except that the ending felt like a fever dream.
…?
Not sure if I’ve managed to convey it properly, but well. Zoya felt out of character throughout RoW, and that the only place I saw KoS Zoya was in the final Os Kervo scene where Zoya finally agrees to be the queen.
c) Nikolai
Nikolai’s arc was very satisfying and brilliant to read about in RoW. In KoS, he seemed very much like a passive character, one of the reasons why his stunt with the Shu in RoW was appreciable, no matter how ill-timed of a plot turn it was. His journey throughout this book was also introspective to see why others deemed him unfit as the King, and even if they were his enemies who thought that in want to dispose him from the throne, Nikolai realizes that him being on the throne is not of much value and that this book was entirely about him seeing his privilege and making decisions to counter and correct the mistakes he’s made. That was nice. Oh, also his father not being an antagonist was a pleasant surprise.
I don’t have many complaints about him, except perhaps wanting some more internal conflict and elaboration about his feelings for Zoya. Them being apart was where it was satisfying, and then in the Ketterdam chapters. His arc could have been better in KoS, but that’s to blame the plot for the characterization.
d) Hanne
Now, from the very start, their arc was super good and it only got better and better until… the ending. Except it’s so odd that Hanne, a poc, has to now live as white person, while feeling comfortable in their transmasc identity. Icky, no? That you need to eliminate one part of your identity in order to feel safe and comfortable about another? Add to this the whole white-passing Zoya thing,,, doesn't exactly send off the right message.
Together with Nina, the ending seems uncharacteristic for both of them. Them coming to accept their powers and knowing to use their powers on their own accord was brilliant, though the entire husband business felt very,,, eh to me, even if it did make sense. The ending about their name and their new identity was too vague.
e) Genya, Leoni and Adrik, Kuwei, Mayu,
Genya is the one who faced the most disservice along with David. While there were exceptional parts to both of their plotlines, it's still sad that even if David's death was necessary, we don't get to see the entirety of her grief and the possible anger, and that her kindness is simply used as the justification for lack of portrayal of grief.
It really did take me by surprise, mostly because I wasn't a fan of the original Shadow and Bone book, but seeing David's conscience and self-awareness, along with Genya's (and Zoya thinking of how she wouldn't let any harm come to them, which shows a bit of her development towards her character development), was plenty refreshing. David and Genya were genuinely the highlights of the book and to kill David off was just. doesn't sit right with me.
Leoni and Adrik deserved more page time. They’re saints and immensely capable (no wonder they’re now the Triumvirate), but a few more pages for them to shine would not only have been nice, but also a necessity.
And now, Kuwei...
....
I mean,,, parem should have been the plot, alongside the entire weaponry and the discussion of making a city killer. But uh… that didn’t happen.
There's not much I have to say about Mayu, Tamar and Ehri, except that their plot was superb, only very badly timed.
There's more to talk about them in the remedy tho.
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IV. Remedy
Here’s the deal. Before KoS release, there should have been a Nina novella.
Nina is a very important character. All of her potential, alongside many other parts of her personality--from dealing with grief, to accustoming to her powers, to growing stronger--there could be so much to do with her as a protagonist, alongside another character: Mayu.
A whole book dedicated to Nina in Fjerda with Hanne? Brilliant. Show Stopping. Mind blowing. It gives SO much page time to explore not just Nina and Mayu, Hanne, but also Zoya, Leoni and Inej. All together.
How?
Nina’s plotline carries the entire medical effects of the use of parem, just as Mayu’s will carry the pain she feels about her brother being a part of the khergud program. The novella will give ample time to flesh them out as characters and protagonists, each dealing with plot problems and problems of their own--like the loss of ones powers and newfound responsibilities, and the shared loss of a beloved person in parallel, even if neither Nina or Mayu interact on page.
Fjerda and Shu Han could be tied together with one chapter as a POV from Zoya (or maybe two), who, along with the Triumvirate and Nikolai, are completely at loss with the political scenario in the country, and are debating over what should be the course of action. Zoya receives news from the scouts, and missives from Nina, and Tamar takes care of the information she garners from the rest of the network, including Shu Han.
Like, the entire surprise of finding a Zoya POV, from a character whom until CK we’ve known as cold hearted and stern and not giving a fuck about anything or anyone, be humanized in that one chapter, thereby building up the anticipation for her arc,,, the very potential,,, *chef's kiss*.
And by the end of book, we could have an POV--or maybe a cameo if not a POV--of Inej meeting Nina on one of her travels of slave hunting. Inej could help take care that the women that Nina has rescued (as Nina does in KoS) reach the Ravkan shorelines safely. But, for a price.
The entire parallels between Leoni and Hanne and Nina could be set up, while also building up the narrative for the Saints’ plotline with Adrik's, Leoni's and Nina’s powers (like it was at the end of KoS). KoS and RoW would thereby continue it by tackling the weaponization and the antidote, Sainthood and the rest of the politics of it all.
Coming to Shu Han: one key aspect that I’d love to have explored would be the importance of art, during or despite the war. Of how war or pain chips away culture, while detailing on the ill effects of it from the commoners' perspectives, from the soldiers etc. Art is integral to Shu Han and could be portrayed by Mayu’s pain finding balm in poetry, of seeing glimpses of Ehri poring over poetry also mayri ftw, of politics that Makhi is weaving against Ravka, etc.
Or also add some more length to Zoya’s POV and explore a bit of Tamar and Tolya and Kuwei’s interactions and perspective added to it, of missing a home that they seemed to not know, or know; of discussing culture and differences on the basis of where they’re from (maybe the twins are from the borders, while Kuwei grew up near the capital or somewhere distant from the borders etc.), all while directly pointing at Zoya’s heritage and how it ebbs at her conscience, no matter how much she wants to bury it.
POTENTIAL !!!
Like,,, Nina novella would have been too powerful. It would have been perfect. I think I’d excuse bringing back the Darkling too if this was the case. (Or maybe not).
But welp.
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Hey, thanks for reading! Not sure if you could make it this far, but if you have, you honestly deserve a medal for sitting through this all. I can’t imagine how tiring it must be to read through this, considering it seemed to take it more than month to compile this there’s also me procrastinating on it too so i’,mbhbdhshfsdn
Drop an ask if you want to talk more about this!
Sincerely, thank you!!!
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alectology-archive · 3 years
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I thought I was fucking weird for not being into any 'lover' trope most especially the enemies to lovers trope which everyone seems to shove in my asexual ass 😭
I thought I was broken because I was reading like a lot of enemies to lovers and tried so hard to like it but at the end of the day I always read it like 😐.
It's probably the 'sexual tension' and the flirting which I as an aroace is so oblivious about. I hope one day that romance and sexual subplots like these won't appear much because it's just so tiring.
(P.S. I kinda don't like the way it's always like 'omg I shouldn't be liking my enemy but they are so hot and mysterious' instead of 'wait my enemy and I has one same goal shit' I probably was irked because of how it always includes seggs in enemies to lovers like can they just connect emotionally please? Dagger to the throat irks me out too, like bro does the mc even hold grudges and shouldn't the enemy apologize too??? I hate myself for being asexual and for being mad when someone mentions that trope. I think I'm the only one that hates this trope and would rather die than to read again????)
your feelings on a trope are always valid regardless of whether other people consider it to be so! and media is oversaturated with overwhelmingly allocishet content often created by really flawed creators so it's especially very frustrating. this also goes to show that representation in media matters a lot and it's why we should advocate for more diversity.
I don't think there's ever going to be less books dealing with allohet relationships because there are far too many consumers that creators can cater to, so I think it might instead help for you to seek out content that's more explicitly queer or made by queer creators!
I definitely understand what you mean about being frustrated with the trope. I partially hate a lot of executions of enemies to lovers (especially in ya books) because the protagonists never seem to actually love each other and the romance often hinges on their attraction or desire to have sex with the other person - which I think can still be executed in interesting ways, but the execution is mostly just really shallow to the point where it's mind numbing.
I'm not quite sure if you hate the trope because it's just not your thing or because it seems to be predominant in a lot of books you read and is often really badly executed? If you're interested in trying out executions of the trope I really, really loved, I'll drop a couple suggestions (bold indicates adult):
defy the stars (lots of communication between the pair)
the bone season (lots of communication between the pair)
this is how you lose the time war
the luminous dead  (check trigger warnings!)
the traitor baru cormorant  (check trigger warnings!)
the locked tomb
daughter of smoke and bone
the seven husbands of evelyn hugo (kind of)
the priory of the orange tree (kind of)
Lots of people also love Crier's War, but I personally couldn't finish the book because the writing didn't feel very solid.
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heart-forge · 3 years
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Hi, do you ever get sad or lose confidence in your writing? Sorry if this is a bit depressing. I really enjoy your writing and I'm having a crisis over my own. Hope you're having a great day.
Oh absolutely. Oh for sure. And it’s a little trite to say “everyone feels that way” but it’s the nature of humans that I am constantly telling my beloved friends that their work is fantastic and even on bad days if there’s anything wrong with it, it’s clearly because they’re working through a brain fog so thick with agony from the struggle associated with being alive (to say nothing of the year of pandemic, uncertain and constantly moving goal posts associated with literally any professional work, and historic job insecurity) that it’s just something that happened to slip through the cracks and is by no means a reflection of them as a creator...
...but you know, when we ourselves do it it’s actually bad and realtime proof that all our illusions of progress and hard earned skill are finally disappating into the smoke that they are, revealing us nakedly in the light as frauds.
One thing I associate with myself a lot is the fear that my work is like. Good enough, you know, as in it’s not anyone’s favourite but it’ll do in a pinch, or that it’s secretly super cringe content that people consume in private but isn’t fit to really hang my hat on as art I have made. Or, that I’m slowly disappointing people: that the quality of every chapter is slowly falling, and that people will eventually lose interest altogether as chapters slowly become meandering, boring, and totally nonsensical.
One important thing to remember is that like, obviously that isn’t true, but also that the most bullheaded and stubborn way we have to deal with this lie is to keep making things anyway. I put chapters out when they’re done even if I’m self-conscious about them, because I’m self-conscious about them due to my impossible standards for myself and nobody else and that’s no reason to torment myself.
I think another thing we have to just kind of settle into is the idea that making things just feels kinda bad sometimes? It feels good enough that you keep going but also like...sometimes we just feel bad, as people, through no fault of our own with no real solution other than to work through it. That’s kind of the point of self-care, no? Sometimes we just feel bad and it’s more useful for us to understand that a shower and some ice cream will make us feel better than it is to try and reckon with the philosophical concepts of art and perfection and how they intersect with capitalism to destroy our self worth.
Also a very good not-so-secret-secret that @leylses articulated to me [time] ago, is that if it feels really bad and you’re constantly in a foggy miserable muck..........................stop doing it. You don’t have to stop forever and it’s not a failure on your part, but why keep forcing yourself to walk on a broken leg? Lemme find the TikTok....
This one from ghosthoney on TikTok !! This is actually a Twitter link but that’s the only place I could find the video RIP but anyway there’s captions on the video but the gist and most important takeaway is when he says “if you’re an artist you’re always going to be an artist and no amount of time you spend away from creating is ever going to change that”. 
You can just....not do a thing if it’s making you miserable, and I’ve met a lot of professionals (and have friends who have met professionals) where it’s definitely been a case of babe, the solution to your problem is to take a break. Not like an hour or a weekend or that thing where you take a week but you’re just counting down to when you have to get back to it......if you’re like PEAK miserable all the time, stop walking in your broken leg. Artists need to consume content too so rather than worry about quality and quantity, do what you gotta do. Whether that thing is powering through, treating yourself kindly, or being like “actually fuck this” and playing video games instead.
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