#my heart says no no

[cracklewink]

My Mane 6 Redesigns all together! I was going to post them separately but ended up finishing them all before I got around to it lol

#mlp #my little pony friendship is magic #my little pony #mlp fim #mlp redesign #earth pony twilight truthers where are you #bat pony fluttershy truthers where are you #dark color palette rarity truthers where are you #ALL OF YOU RISE WITH ME #im ESPECIALLY an earth pony twilight truther ever since I saw the old G5 concepts #I love the idea that Twilight's bonds with others are her true magic rather than beams or spells and I feel earth pony twi fits that well #since “the five elements brought together creates the sixth element magic“ aka friendship since FIM she embodies ”magic“ in a #more metaphorical sense #the star in her eyes is also a reference to the first ep when twilight says “the spark” ignited inside of her heart #plus the earth pony to alicorn pipeline is so cool and i like the idea of an earth pony being the bearer of the element of magic as a #fun contrast/its unexpected

[inkskinned]

fucking hate it when the stuff everybody says "actually works" does actually work.

hate exercising and realizing i've let go of a lot of anxiety and anger because i've overturned my fight-or-flight response.

hate eating right and eating enough and eating 3 times a day and realizing i'm less anxious and i have more energy

hate journaling in my stupid notebook with my stupid bic ballpoint and realizing that i've actually started healing about something once i'm able to externalize it

hate forgiving myself hate complimenting myself more often hate treating myself with kindness hate taking a gratitude inventory hate having patience hate talking to myself gently

hate turning my little face up to the sun and taking deep breaths and looking at nature and grounding myself and realizing that i feel less burdened and more hopeful, more actually-here, that i am able to see the good sides of myself more clearly, that i am able to see not only how far i have to grow - but also how much growth i have already done & how much of my life i truly fill with light and laughter and love

horrible horrible horrible. hate it but i'm gonna do it tho

[shadowtraveled]

"mithrun is the only real monsterfucker in dungeon meshi" is objectively the funniest bit you can get out of his everything, but in all seriousness i think his attraction to his love interest is deliberately overstated—and that makes sense, because romantic jealousy is a classic and digestible motive, which is explicitly what kabru was aiming for in condensing mithrun's backstory, and also because until chapter 94, mithrun wasn't willing to admit to the true nature of his desires.

but because romantic envy is both classic and digestible, it probably isn’t a unique enough or complicated enough desire to tempt a demon’s appetite. mithrun’s wish, as far as we can figure from kabru’s reduced retelling, was to have a life in which he had never become one of the canaries, and that carries like 3857 implications and desires within it. that’s delicious. his love interest acts as sort of a red herring to his motivation for making it, though. (side note: i'm saying "love interest" here because, keeping in mind that i barely speak japanese on a good day anymore, "想い人" is something i'd usually take as just kind of an old-fashioned and romantic way to refer to a lover, but in context i wonder if both the connotation of yearning and the vagueness are intentional, and i think this phrasing gets those aspects of it more effectively. anyway.)

mithrun considered his love interest to be untrustworthy. there was a minute where i thought that comment might be about a similar-looking elf (yugin, one of his squad members), but comparing the two…

the "sketchy" arrow is definitely referring to the elf we know as his love interest—the bangs go toward her right, she only has the one forehead ornament, and, most notably, her ears aren't notched.

every time she’s given a full-body depiction in his dungeon, she’s drawn as a chimera, with the body of a snake from the waist down. (side note: the “what if a dungeon has chimeras before reaching level 4?”/“then the dungeon lord is unstable” exchange just being mithrun grilling his past self alive is so funny. he’s so. but anyway) there are a couple things about this.

first, the snake part of the chimera appears to be modeled after some species of coral snake mimic

which, in the biology-for-fun manga, i… doubt is a coincidence, especially with the added context of the “untrustworthy” comment. the dungeon’s conjured illusion of mithrun’s love interest was a harmless copycat of a venomous original. for whatever reason, he felt this person was a threat and made up a "safe" version of her to be in a relationship with, and while it’s definitely possible to be attracted to or even love someone you find to be toxic and/or intimidating, when you take that into consideration alongside the configuration of her body, you get some interesting implications.

which brings us to our second point: if we assume that mithrun was not in fact fucking a snake, then sexual attraction, at least, was so far removed from his idea of a relationship with this person that he did not even bother to keep her dungeon copy human enough to maintain the illusion of the option of a sexual relationship. this is somewhat echoed in the depictions of their interactions, which also imply a frankly unexpected romantic distance. she kisses his cheek and he doesn't seem to react; she's at the edge of a narrow bed with only one set of pillows, on top of his blankets while he's underneath them.

the kiss is particularly interesting because it seems to contrast the text. kabru's narration tells us this was everything mithrun could have asked for, but mithrun is there looking unreadable to pensive, likely because this is right before the panel that makes it clear things in the dungeon are beginning to go wrong.

walking through this backwards for a minute, we have the physical barrier of his bedding and the spatial separation inherent in a bed made for one person, the emotional barrier of his mounting anxiety getting in the way of his ability to enjoy the affection he sought, and... the snake, which historically carries the connotation of temptation, yes, but also mistrust, barring physical intimacy. okay. ok. if a dungeon reflects the mentality of its lord, all of this might suggest that mithrun was not able to have any real desire for a relationship with this person. his unwillingness to be vulnerable or let another person in was insurmountable. but in that case, why was she such a focal point that she remained to the end, after his dungeon had stopped creating iterations of his friends to come and visit him? why would he get so upset over her meeting with his brother that he became lord of a dungeon about it?

well. mithrun's brother was also interested in her, probably genuinely. and mithrun had to win.

you have an older brother who your parents completely ignore, probably in part because he is chronically ill/disabled and almost definitely in part because he received a ton of recessive traits that resulted in rumors that he was an illegitimate child. you are aware, most likely because those same parents fucking told you, that you actually are an illegitimate child. but they keep you around because you had the good fortune of looking just like your mother. what can that possibly teach you but that you, like your brother, are disposable?

it's utterly unsurprising that mithrun, under these circumstances, developed a pathological need to be better than everyone around him. people don't keep you otherwise. i'd argue this is also why he says he looked down on everyone he knew while milsiril claims his dungeon reeked of feelings of inferiority—he sought out people's worst traits and prioritized them in his mind to protect his already extremely fragile sense of self-worth, and all the while he tried to be as likable and high-performing as he possibly could be. his parents disposed of him anyway, but even then he tried to keep up the performance. he was kind to everyone. he never once lost to a dungeon.

when he saw his "love interest" meeting up with his brother, what he saw was himself being replaced by a person his parents had always treated as worthless, and if that was what they thought of the child they'd kept, what value could anyone possibly see in the bastard they'd given away to die? mithrun and kabru tell the story like he wanted to win this unnamed elf's heart, but it was never about being with her. it was about cementing his worth, proving that he didn't deserve to be thrown away.

and so it's particularly cruel that his demon discarded him, too. but maybe it's also particularly gentle that, in the end, there was someone who refused to even consider giving up on him.

kui laid it out in three panels better than i could hope to.

yeah. it's love. you wanted to be loved, even when the only way you were able to understand it was through the desire to be wanted, and you wanted that so badly that the idea of being consumed felt like the promise of finally mattering to someone.

#dungeon meshi spoilers #mithrun #dungeon meshi #this has been rotating for a while but i wanted to check my evidence before getting into it thanks user angelspenance for posting that meme #half of this is just the text and the other half i'm sure has been said before but it's making my brain [radio static] so here this is #someone did for sure mention this but i do find it very cute that in his fucked up conjured world meant to portray his ideal reality #his teammates came to visit him. like part of the fantasy was then explicitly that they cared about him and were his friends. even though #he says he tried to see the worst in them. #hm it does feel important to note that i do also believe 100% in mithrun suicidality--his desire to be eaten does seem to focus a lot on #wanting it to be Over. wanting not to be left incomplete and empty anymore. #but that loops back around a bit to the hole in your heart that appears when you feel unloved. it's many things and the same thing at once #snakes #long post #severe problems #meshy

[teaboot]

You need to make art that nobody else likes. You need to make art that speaks to you alone. You need to cradle a serpent that eats its own tail and you need to love it until it loves you back

#The best art I've ever made will never be hung in anyone's home #That's not the point #It's not about being good #It's about being real #It's about eating something unpalatable #It's about being consumed #And tasting bitter #It's gorging yourself on crude oil just to feel something different #It's biting your tongue to make yourself cry #I'm saying that I am capable of making you feel good through personal sacrifice but I kind of don't want to cut myself up like that #If you want my heart to taste good you have to prepare it yourself #That isn't my problem

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Happy Thistle Debut Day!

#dungeon meshi #Thistle #Old dungeon meshi fans remember the days when it was ambiguous what gender Thistle was. #Now we know Thistle uses he/him pronouns but in my heart Thistle is still non-binary. Clowngender elf with poor coping skills. #I hope the anime-only watchers know that this is a character to keep an eye on. #Love (in it's many forms) and desire (in it's many forms) is the main course of Dungeon Meshi and THIS silly jester? #My goodness. What a perfect encapsulation of how one can hurt other's so deeply in the name of love. #The actions we take to 'protect' other's is often the route to doing the most harm. #Love is letting go. Sometimes that means control and sometimes that means saying farewell forever to someone.

[seaside-cave]

entering my benoit blanc era

#ssc art #glass onion #knives out glass onion #glass onion spoilers #benoit blanc #janelle monae #fanart #i saw your chanel boots (ascots) mr blanc!! #also i say benoit blanc era but miss janelle has had my heart for years #make no mistake

[jerich0two]

Quick sketch for aro awareness week! Very much enjoying all the Alastor redesigns with ponytails I've been seeing, so I decided to give him one too! Rosie is SO much easier to draw than he is ... lordie

#hazbin hotel #hazbin art #alastor #aromantic #aro awareness week #hazbin hotel rosie #radiorose #<- platonic #saw someone say their friendship is favourable aro and repulsed aro and i love that idea with all my heart #cupioromantic

[bookshelfdreams]

yk when you see someone share a finished handmade item that they clearly spent a lot of time and money on and it's just. The absolute tackiest thing you have seen in your life. And then you ask yourself why someone would waste all those resources on such an eyesore.

(no, of course you can't relate to that because you're a much nicer person than me)

In any case.

BEHOLD!

A wool coat!

The top fabric is handwoven and handspun, the whole thing is sewn by hand, too.

Leftovers. Barely anything, all things considered, which is very satisfying.

This thing took me well over 3 years to make, on and off. And now I'm done.

Thank you for your attention.

#carry on XD #i hope y'all realize that when I say tacky it's with nothing but love in my heart #yes it's ugly. that's the whole point. #everyone should have an item in their wardrobe that will get Looks and raised eyebrows #it's good for you #anyway can't believe I'm done! this is a huge boost to my crafting hubris I CAN DO ANYTHING #wizard bathrobe adventures #handweaving #handspinning #hand sewing #look what i made #crafts #overall I'm happy with it even though there's. things that aren't ideal #the pockets are set a bit too low #and i should have made it a tiny bit longer not much but maybe like 5cm #anyway #overall it's a nice coat i think #Now That's What I Call Slow Fashion

[davidjrpalos]

my warm heart for your cold hands

#art #artists on tumblr #illustration #graphite #black and white #self #sketchbook #heard the cold hands warm heart saying when I was young and it never exited my brain #traditional art

[slymanner]

hurt my heart why dontcha.

#adventure time #fionna and cake #fionna and cake spoilers #simon petrikov #BMO #this is seriously fucked up u cant do this to me im so sadSNSSN #IMAGINE BEING BMO #just one day finn and jake say they'll brb and they're going on a important mission... #and BMO after this and them being gone for awhile just see's the world go into peril #death everywhere. no sign of his friends expect remnant's of the past.. #and the only survivor is them... #no other's expect the thing who released hell upon this once lively and colorful world in the first place. #and BMO just accept's this...tells themselves that they're still around...cosplay's as they're old friend's...this is fucked up #in the current timeline all his friend's are gone to natural circumstances. #but for this one? it was too early. too sudden. atleast in this one BMO will remember they're name's but...man. #this poor lil robo cant get a BREAK. #AND THEY FUCKING DIE IN SACRIFICE AT THE END TOO SHUTUPPPDPDPDPD #and the fact BMO also consider's “jerry” a friend...not knowing...that the same person caused all this. #this is...SO FUCKED UP #WHY MUST THE SHOW WRITERS DO THIS TO MY HEART.

[astraystayyh]

#this broke my heart to a million pieces #i don't even know what to say anymore #so sick so fucked up all of this #free gaza #free palestine #palestine #coloniaslim #gaza #human rights #jerusalem

[malenjoyer]

#1 gotham yaoi

#two face #harvey dent #batman #bruce wayne #bruharvey #my art #i'm a multishipper.. but i must say this wins my heart in terms of bruce ships #huge fan of i can fix you (i'm also not well) ships

[p4nishers]

crowley, drunk off his ass: and i was yk just some fucked up soul born in cold and rain but he was my fucking sunlight or whatever

hozier, frantically writing on a napkin: HHHMMMM TELL ME MORE

#hozier is INSANELY azicrow coded and i am going feral over the implications that crowley heard the lines 'if the heavens ever did speak she #the last true mouthpiece' LIKE EXCUSE ME????????? #'u called me angel for the first time my heart leapt from me' and crowley cries himself to sleep #'heaven is not fit to house a love like u and i' and crowley projectile vomits onto the floor #'it cant be unlearned i have known the warmth of your doorways' 'i slithered here from eden just to hide outside ur door' 'though i burn how #could i fall when i am lifted by every word u say to me' and his ass is GONE he has EXPLODED #good omens #inefabble husbands #good omens s2 #good omens season 2 #azicrow #hozier #crowley #aziraphale

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

i have a Scene - a Plot if you will - that backs this as context. y'all are gonna have to trust me on this one <3 or read the tags...

#the song is 'in your eyes' by peter gabriel #boombox serenade lets GO!!! #in my mind immediately after this the others came over to say hi (or in sallys case tell him off) #and at first howdy's like 'oh ofc wallys there that makes sense. sally too? strange but alright' #then eddie appears and ohhhh boy its Jealousy Central Babey and howdy's train just pulled into the station #scribble salad #laughingstock #welcome home #barnaby x howdy #howdy x barnaby #OK CONTEXT I PROMISED CONTEXT #so in my mind howdy is an oblivious dumbass when it comes to his own romantic feelings. #he's so in love with barnaby (its very obvious) but Doesnt Realize It. despite being a god tier flirty fruity motherfucker #so when barnaby - thinking theyre on the same page - confesses #howdy's all like 'ohhh um. gee barn im flattered truly but - i just dont like you like that' #yk breaking barnaby's heart right down the middle #so barnaby shuts himself in his home and wally is hovering. yk Worried #and eddie - who's been helping barnaby come to terms w/ his own feelings & gauge if howdy feels the same - asks sally to check in for him #& sally goes over and Immediately involves herself. she takes personal offense on barnaby's behalf #also she lives for the drama and wants every juice detail Hot Off The Press #so while howdy is having a lil crisis as he slowly realizes Oh My Fucking God I DO Love Barnaby Like That- #barnaby / sally / wally / (eventually) eddie are all having a sleepover where they just play card games and chat #a good ol bitch n' stitch night #and howdy shows up to try and talk to barns (obvs in my head he doesnt have a boombox he just Knocks) #only to get RE-RE-RE-REJECTEDDDDDD!!!! thats how it feels you wormy mf! #bc barnaby is a) having a girls night & b) needs to emotionally prepare for That conversation #aaaaand THATS the context <3

[fishyfishyfishtimes]

Hot take, I really don’t think we should assign human morals onto animals and call them bad or evil. Fishblr has internalised this idea really well with sharks, and I think that’s good! Sharks don’t deserve all the fearmongering they suffer from in media. But… can we please remember to extend this to other animals too? Even to intelligent animals like dolphins (most commonly bottlenose dolphins) and orcas. It seems to be a counter to pop culture’s tendency to show dolphins as complete angels when they partake in some messed up things, but like…. Dolphins are still animals? They may be able to recognize themselves in mirrors and they may have language and culture and know how to use tools but their intelligence is still on the level of a human child (and how empathetic are those!!??). I see people talk about how evil dolphins are but I never see people talking about other animals the same way, like, why aren’t sea otters and their “evilness” the topic of discussion? :/

#i have seen people saying that its a joke or just a shorthand for saying that an animal is unpredictable. #but two things: is it r e a l l y a joke anymore? #and! if saying that an animal is evil is shorthand for the animal being dangerous or unpredictable; why not just say that!!?? #when you call an animal evil it implies that the animal is aware of its actions as being malicious but it commits them anyway #this is rarely ever the case! #calling an animal dangerous or unpredictable better describes what the potential problem might be when you interact with said animal #anyway yeah you dont have to take my rambling to heart #fish #fishblr #biology #zoology #marine biology #shark #sharks #dolphin #dolphins are evil #dolphins