#my night is already scheduled for me | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

deafening-radio-silence · 2 months

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I think that Dr. Christina "I was an excellent soldier" Raynor needs to deal with some personal things before she's anyone's therapist, because she strong-armed more of Bucky's autonomy away from him than Zemo did within the series.

#yeah man make amends for the shit that happened when you didn't even have control over your own thoughts #so she was giving him a way to “fix things” but that wasn't on him to do so #all she did was doubly reinforce what he already thinks - which is a justified but false and guilt-laden perception - about the situation #idk much about therapy but i don't think that they're sposed to do that. correct me if i'm wrong and then i'll go fight all therapists #bucky barnes #tfaws #alpine #my art #thank you for putting up with my drawings of a comic book character and his asshole cat lol #i had to put my dog down recently in a bad way and i can't rightfully get another house dog with my current work schedule #so i got a cat since they can handle being inside for the day and the shelter lady said she's super antisocial towards other cats #she's super antisocial towards me sometimes too but she sleeps on me at night and my house has never been cleaner #now that i have to vacuum cat fur and mind what i leave lying on the counter #i've never liked cats before but she's special i guess idk ain't everyone's cat special lol #anyway i'll stop using my tumblr blog as a blog now lol

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yikes-ajax · 6 months

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I dont have a clever and witty sarcastic comment tonight, I just think she's cute

#my brain isnt working rn its 3am ive been reading fanfics while hyperventilating over the irreparable damage i managed with my limited life #tee hee im just kinda feeling moody tonight 🤪#somebody please ban me from tumblr between 1am to 11am i do not function as a stable person between those times #i schedule my mental breakdowns they work really well with my schedule #its multitasking cause I'll already be up from insomnia its really efficient in the grand scheme of things #ah i love the fact that nobody can stop me from writing the most deranged shit in the tags of a cute cat pic <3 #animals #petblr #cat #cat life #cat lovers #catblr #my cat #cat photos #cat pictures #cats of tumblr #calico #calico cat #OH UH THATS WHAT I WAS SUPPOSED TO SAY FOR AMERICANS THE REASON IM SAYING ITS NIGHT WHEN THIS IS POSTED DURING THE DAY IS BECAUSE ITS QUEUED #i queue most stuff because i dont usually have the energy or time to be active at good times #i get little bursts of post motivation and dont wanna flood my 9 followers (at least 6 are dirty bots) with my bs #im just a dumbass that never tags shit

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dragon-spaghetti · 2 years

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STIMMY STIMMY STIMMY

#drag's art #rottmnt #rise of the tmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #save rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #unpause rottmnt #unpause rise of the tmnt #rottmnt donnie #rottmnt donatello #rise donnie #rise donatello #donnie hamato #donatello hamato #I LOVE MY AUTISTIC SON SM #I was meant to post this last night then forgot to schedule it whoops #if you have my twitter/are in a discord server w me you might've already seen this lmfao #anyways; fun fact I kept also stimming while drawing this

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b4kuch1n · 1 year

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done with the current dip pen comm queue (just in time for another Nib Accident too lol. I’m learning how to take care of the tools as well) so uh! it’ll take me two days to get a replacement and get some other stuff done. which means slots will be available again this saturday!

#bakuspeech #thank you my first pen nib (in all manners that count really). you've served me extremely well #especially for how I treated you lmao #you know what. gonna pin it to my corkboard later. it deserves a place on there #I think it's specifically because I'm using a pretty thick non-water-based ink I got a Long time ago #for brush inking when I was doing that. and boy oh boy does it dry Thicque #and it dries really fast. so by the time I get to wiping my pen it's already caked there lol #so I might have to try using other inks as well. knowledge! learning!#I'm thinking opening for comm at noon instead of night like last time? so folks with different schedules can see it lmao #but yeah. I'll take my time! I'll mess around with it. its been real #I wanna start drafting the comic proper and stuff... Im so glad I'm still so excited about doing this after over a week lol #really kinda what I needed after the March Madness (adhd induced nonsense depression)#hope folks who've got a comm from me so far enjoyed what I drew!!

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best-fnaf-song-competition · 4 months

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Oh you KNOW this playlist is full of bangers when I've got 4-5 of them stuck in my head at once

#CANT WAIT TO DO THE TOURNAMENT NOW #the rotation is like #brought this on yourself - remnants of gold - five nights - five unholy nights - chronicles of bonnie #theres a few more that pop in for less time too #this hasnt happened since the first time i listened to nothing but the mechanisms for a week #IVE ALREADY LEARNED SOME OF THE WORDS TO THESE SONGS TOO AND ITS BEEN 2 DAYS #this tournament is going to be so fun #not a poll #OH YEAH special tag update on that btw #all the images are obtained and the bracket image has been made!#so all thats left to do is - edit the images to all be 500x500 - organize the images and songs Into the bracket #- make the poll matchup images - get the polls up and scheduled!!!#once i have the bracket image itself ill put that up an hour or two before the polls drop #so you have time to look if youd like!#okay this was a long update whatever anyway #if you havent listened to these songs yet you are MISSING OUT #theres some that definitely feel like Babys First Song because its a lot of smaller artists #but dont get me wrong. one of the ones with the worst mic quality is probably one of my FAVORITES #i KNOW the big artists are probably going to sweep for sure #but i HOPE its a hard won fight #2023 tournament

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literalite · 1 month

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idk how or when this happened but whenever my friends decide to hang out all the decisionmaking and planning falls to me and im kind of sick of it 💀

#and then people decide to pull out last minute and shit- the last time literally everyone pulled out even tho id already told them the plan #a month in advance. i ended up just going to the beach alone because i was so upset and angry and i didnt want to waste my free time #THIS time the meet wasnt even my idea but im having to coordinate the plan anyway because everyones been so slack and evasive and its a fri #night so if we dont book in advance then everythings gonna be full 😭😭#like scheduling is already hard bc we're all adults so we're all really busy but WHY why does it always fall to me to plan it?#im not like a natural born leader its exhausting to try and talk to everyone. cannot begin to emphasize this plan wasnt even mine to begin #with this time for once id like to be invited to smth and not have to micromanage the details bcos everyone else cant be fucked #seph.txt

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catastrxblues · 3 months

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ajsjdkssjdjdnsnxjxjjxdkdksksndndndjxjxjuxhdhdenekekwkeowodkdmdkseiejnddnwkwoqisyxysjsjsjsjsjsjsnsnsnsnsnsnsnsmsmkssjnenwnwwjejeueieiekwkwkwkekememenendjdjdj

#so many things #this is one my ways to let it out <3 #i have a chem thing tomorrow and i’m screaming inside (1)#i have to review and practice lots of the material because i’m still very much BAD at it all in one night :TONIGHT (2)#i dread the moment next week starts when i’m back in my normal schedule of classes again because wooho look what i’ve reaped from those fiv #days of dispensation!!!! absolutely nothing. (3)#anyways. i also. have started liking on an actual real life person again for some reason and it’s been a torture #but i’ve been trying not to think about it (lie) (i think about it way too much & actually have started writing about it & it’s eughh) (4)#i have plenty of regret playing in my head over and over (5)#i’m pretty sure a certain person dislikes me and that it’s actually justified because oh my godd :/ (6)#okay goodbye 🫶🏽#chem tag #got lovestruck went straight to my head #nadirants #OH AND ALSO #i already feel nostalgic about the people i have just become close with this week ://///(7)

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callixton · 4 months

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oh i am on the Brink of a mental breakdown. and like a real one. i am going to feel so so fucking terrible and guilty if i don’t go to the first week of mac rehearsal bc i need to recover but i am also getting the sense that i Need to recover. i have never been this burnt out or genuinely terrified of starting a new semester in my life.

#we go back to campus a week early for mac. to be clear #and god they’ll be long days and they’ll be physically emotionally and mentally draining and i genuinely dont know if i can take that #but i am also going to be missing SO much time. and i won’t be there to support the people who i need to #i have also. been thinking a lot about how i’m scared that i think so much abt death bc i’m gonna be one of those people #who seem even more than everyone else like they have a finite time and then they die young #and then my mom compared me to jonathan larson tonight #so maybe that’s some sort of sign that i need to slow the fuck down #i am crying rn. for myself. which happens about three times a year #and yeah one is usually during winter break so we’re on schedule #i don’t know. idk!! i don’t know what to do here #and i still have to do my fucking scene prep for tomorrow #bc i was talking my mom about it and i really needed support which she was giving and then she has to leave for five seconds #and when she came back the entire conversation was just about her own problems again which we’ve already talked about every fucking night bc #- you can’t leave conversations with her and i hate when she fucking drunks i hate it i hate it #i am Not Well. i’ve sort of been avoiding admitting to myself just how badly #but man. i can push through anything until i drop but when i start wishing that i’ll drop so i have an excuse for a break….. not good #ted talks #the west wing

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gatheryourships · 2 months

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So, because @gunslingerorchid asked, here's a post about my self-insert Tav, Rosenna.

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I’ll be honest I don’t have a whole lot about her fleshed out. And even trying to write this up for you, so much got changed and rewritten a number of times, and even this response is a complete start over from the very long and honestly confused lore bit I wrote.

Basically what I wrote for the fake BG3 intro post I reblogged on here is pretty much all I got, lmao. But I’ll try to give some more info, as much as I got nailed down right now. Maybe some more that’s not so concrete yet either.

Um, so. Rosenna is an only child, born and raised by a farmer and his wife (last name undetermined) in a little hamlet (also name undetermined) located along the Chionthar river a little ways down from Baldur’s Gate.

Right around that little nook maybe, where the red dot is. I still haven’t decided which side of the river it’s on. But around that area. So that’s it’s between the Fields of the Dead and the Woods of Sharp Teeth.

Rose (for short) lived a nice, little life with her parents. Helped her mom with house chores and what not as commoner daughters do. Also helped her dad a little with the farm - probably a bit less common for daughter to do, but eh. She likes helping and only doing house chores drove her crazy. And it’s something different so she was fine with it, despite getting a little dirty sometimes because of it. Also it was spending time with dad, so… That’s nice. xD

From a young age, Rose had been immersed with stories about heroes. Not necessarily intentionally mind you. Just parents telling their kid stories, censored versions of course. And from there, as she grew up, just got into reading stories about heroes herself.

And between having a good, kind, caring heart and just being a feisty, determined woman who only wants to do right she naturally felt an inclination towards such a life.

However… her mother had another plans for her. Not out of ill-will, just normal life plans that a commoner daughter would typically live. Help her mother until she (Rose) found someone to marry, which her parents were starting to push that onto her, except Rose didn’t have much interest in that. (Yet, anyways. Hero thing first, romance later possibly, ya know.)

What Rose did have an interest in was going to the docks and rubbing shoulders with people who came from Baldur’s Gate and even elsewhere afar, wanting to hear real stories of adventures and journeys from real people that they’ve had, especially recently.

Now it’s here where I’m unsure whether to spin it off as how she picked up some sense of handling a sword. One way is that because going to the docks and rubbing shoulders with strangers is obviously a terrible, dangerous thing to do and her father (and mother) become worried for her and so her father (who’s also maybe part of the citizen militia for the little hamlet - no standing army) decides to teach her (in secret/aka behind mom’s back) so she stops trying to go to the docks (and possibly end up kidnapped or worse one day). Fun, nice, gets interaction with her dad. But like, I just realized it’s the same as the other self-insert for another character I like/liked. So, since I’m already doing that plotline with another character, I’ll probably go with the second option then lmao.

The other one was an idea I had before but was unsure about it (then not now) where she does meet someone from the docks. Not a romantic interest, but thankfully a friendly and honorably decent person. He obviously realized that she’s young (20s, since I didn’t mention that before) and a bit starry-eyed, but she means well and was looking for more in her life, more than this little hamlet could give her. He befriended her and indulged her in giving her stories of his travels and interesting little adventures and happenings he found himself in every time he came into town (only ever stopping by, as did anyone else whoever found themselves at the docks there). Eventually, he himself buys her a sword and trains her how to use it.

From there to BG3 events however… One day it’s too much. Rose’s reckless immaturity has become too much for her mother. So Rose and her mother got in an argument. Her mother had not been oblivious to Rose and her love of heroes, but had hoped that Rose would grow out of it as she got older (she didn’t, it only grew stronger). And enough was enough. It was time to be a grown woman, look for a partner, and settle down and become not just a wife but mother herself. To say Rose was unhappy about this would be a completely understatement. After a yelling match with her mother, Rose quickly packed some things (including her stashed away secret sword) and left home. She got on the first ship to Baldur’s Gate and that was that.

For a year, Rose tried her best there. She got jobs. But they weren’t great. Didn’t pay great. By the end of it, things were… pretty bleak, mentally speaking for Rose. (In my playlist, as confused as it is with this summarization of character, I literally have The Parting Glass (Walking Dead version) followed by the instrumental version of I Want to Live from BG3. I think that says plenty.)

The next morning as she’s going about town is when the mindflayers come and she gets unfortunately (or technically speaking, quite fortunately) snatched up. (Only way to become a hero is go on a crazy adventure right? 😉)

#tav #tav talk #blogger's own #blogger blab #Sorry for so much but that's all of it #as much as i have of it now #i gotta go fix my playlist now that i've changed that whole part of who teaches her swordfighting lmao #its just her life at the hamlet i have issues with #from the fight with her mother to when she gets picked up by the mindflayers- all that is for certain.#oh! i just realized i forgot to add about my main au versions of rose. lmao too long already.#also i don't want to scare you off by talking to much about my tav so lol #let me know if you want to know more #(also yes i took all night to write this. mainly bc my sleep schedules all fucked but ya know lol whoops)

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jarognieva · 8 months

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I must survive this week I must survive this week I must survive this week

#I want Sunday already #how to break jara's will: made her to work from 6 am for 6 days #I'm night owl and I can't shift my sleep schedule #I can't fall asleep before 11pm (but even 11 pm is still hard to gain)#so I sleep max. 5 hours at night and I feel terrible whole day #+this job makes me feel my brain is melting because of overstimulation #+I'm so exhausted every day #inb4 'jeez jara just find another job 🙄'#It's not so easy for anxious (and probably autistic) girl who is no student anymore (it's harder to find no-shitty job if u're not student #i want to draw and write so much #my notebook is full of ideas but I can't turn them into words properly #especially in english cuz i feel like my brain is melting;_;

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robotic-maid · 9 months

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How things are going again… update I guess? Still can’t figure out how to read more on mobile. I’m just typing this out so it can leave my head.

#nights are really hard for me #mornings are also really hard for me #I think my jobs burning me out #and I haven’t been able to sleep very well much at all #I’ve only been getting 3-5 hours if I’m lucky because my nightmares are really bad so I usually just stay awake #I mean I have to get up at 4am anyway so what’s the point #do you know how it feels to be in pain but you can’t cry because your body’s grown so used to it?#so it feels like crying because it’s Wednesday again #which I can’t justify because tommorrow is Thursday and that is your new normal #your new normal is working so hard you don’t have the time to see your dog and your cars ac is out and you spend all your money on the room #you sleep in 15 minutes away from the office you are stuck at more than 11hoirs a day #you ask your job to adjust your schedule and they say they can’t without cutting your hours and you need the money to survive #it’s too much #but feeling this way or not feeling this way won’t make a difference because the only other options will make your living situation harder #I’m so tired but I don’t have any better options right now so I have to keep waking up and working #I feel horrible spending time with me friends because I get tired after an hour and I worry that I’ve become #too flaky or something #I can’t stay up late and I’m already stressed out so I just can’t keep up with everyone and I don’t want to be a drain #I wish my heart would just stop some times #my meds stop me from hurting myself or crying or sleeping too long but these feelings always come to me when I wake up #I’m disappointed I woke up again #I don’t want to keep doing this I don’t know how long I can keep going #my body is breaking down like my car is breaking down #I don’t want to keep doing this I need more than a day off work a week I want to see my dog I don’t want to be poor but I don’t want to #wake up just to spend all day in an office getting yelled at while my coworkers come in and leave before me #I know I can do this I know I need to keep doing this I know there’s nothing better for me than this #I shouldn’t say these horrible things out loud because they’ll just wear me down faster #there’s nothing that will help me I need to help myself #this is en endurance test and I need to keep it up because if I fail I will lose so much more than I have #I wish I could cry I wish I could break down and scream but what would be the point? it won’t help it won’t fix anything m

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ereborne · 28 days

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Song of the Day: March 26

"Songs About Rain" by Gary Allan

#song of the day #you might think that this is the opposite of 'Groovy Little Summer Song' but nope! closer to same because (drumroll)#they are one of the very best categories of thing: Country Songs About Country Songs #I love them. I adore them #'Songs About Rain' is one of the strongest and best examples of type I have (also 'Cheatin Songs' by Midland. impeccable)#'and it sure ain't easin my pain / all these songs like / Rainy Night in Georgia / Kentucky Rain #Here Comes That Rainy Day Feelin Again / Blues Eyes Cryin in the Early Mornin Rain #they go on and on and there's no two the same / oh it would be easy to blame / all these songs about rain'#what a gift. what a delight. legitimately hard to sing this song in a mournful voice because it makes me so damn happy #anyway as you might glean from how this is posting at 3 pm my time: my sleep schedule is /fucked/#I did have part of the bad conversation with my boss on Monday (immediately followed by garden times #which so overtook me that I spoke only about the garden and good spring feeling in my song post. what a blessing the garden is)#but mostly what happened is I said 'hey it is technically possible for me to make this but it will not help it will not do anything useful'#and my boss said 'but you can make it' and I said 'yes but we shouldn't. it will be a waste of time' and she said 'make it by Thursday'#and I said 'I absolutely cannot make it by Thursday. if I finish instead this better thing I've already been working on--'#and she said 'no we don't care about that thing. make part of the useless thing. by Thursday morning'#and I said 'if I bring you part of the useless thing and part of the good thing and I directly compare them in front of you--'#and she said 'we'll look at whatever you have Thursday morning but it's the useless thing we care about'#so the meeting is scheduled and I'm going to plead for the life of my better thing and probably the best I'll get is permission to do both #which is. I mean the useless thing is going to be a time-waster for sure but at least it won't be actively detrimental to anything?#it'll be fine I'll make it be fine. the inherent problems of when your boss doesn't actually know what you do for them I guess :/#(also maybe. maybe if it comes down to it. maybe I'll just make the good thing for myself and use it to make my own life better #and someday maybe they'll ask for a project that works and then I'll be able to dramatically unveil it but either way I'll benefit from it #hmm maybe yeah)

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undead-potatoes · 4 months

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I don't complain a lot about it on here bc what's the point, but man am I tired (no pun intended) of being chronically ill

The way it has eaten away my entire adult life, the way it keeps eating away what little life I get to live, keeping me from hobbies and experiences and loved ones, how it fucks with my everything to the point where I can't even do something as simple as take a shower without suffering the consequences for 4 days straight

And I'm so, so afraid that this is all my life will ever be, that I'll never be free of this shit bullshit disease and it will just keep stealing my life away from me until there's no more life left to steal

#Sunny Life #Negative cw #hey don't mind me everything just sucks today #I blame it on the shitty night I just had (which is also my chronic illness' (and winter's) fault so yaay)#worst part is I don't even feel like I can talk to my parents about this bc it'll upset them and they're already upset enough on my behalf #so I just sit her stewing in it alone which I'm sure super healthy #I probably should have a therapist but I don't have the spoons for scheduled appointsments so you know *finger guns*

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amethystsoda · 10 months

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