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#my plan to take over the world

thejasontoddarchives · 8 months

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There’s a general consensus that above all else Jason should be homicidal again. However I think what’s also very important is that he should be a fucking hoot.

There’s nothing not funny about this entire bit.

1. He couldn’t give less of a shit about explaining that he’s single-handedly trying to stop a terrorist attack. Obviously cause he’s short on time, but even if he had all the time in the world he would still be this indifferent towards explaining himself to cops.

2. This bomb is seconds away from exploding but he’s at most mildly annoyed like he’s in the office doing some menial task.

3. The perfectly timed British jokes.

4. Circling back to number 1 on the list. After he throws the bomb into the water he just dips. For all they know he’s the (weird) terrorist. (But as long as everyone’s okay he doesn’t care! The beauty of Jason Todd everybody).

This one is funny (but it’s also true)? Like yes … that is exactly what you are. (A sweet, kind-hearted goodboy learning how to effectively poison people, shoot guns, and blow shit up with all manner of explosives like a certified pro).

Bonus:

Red Hood: The Lost Days #5 (2010-)

Red Hood: The Lost Days #4 (2010-)

“Not so irritating for an American” is a far more impressive title than “genius” if you ask me. Although I think Jason balances both pretty well.

#lost days was actually a comedy it gets funnier every time I reread it #look I know in recent days he’s become more serious/glum as a character #he’s sorta detached from people and situations and he seems to have lost his spunk #and my mind is zoning in on Zdarsky. him feeling immense guilt and burden over people he kills.#which like. even Matt Murdock fans said Zdarsky leaned a bit too heavily into Catholic guilt lol #Jason should be like this again #boiling inside him is untamed rage and pain and hurt but the jokes keep rolling off his tongue in an endless stream #just as playful with his words as he is with his bombs and takeover plans #from moments like the bomb under the bridge or even just the 'nice boy' comment #you see just how much he not only doesn’t care about being labelled a hero for his actions but how he actively detests it even #it’s one of the things that makes him so endearing to me like: look at this humble kind kid who loves and cares for the world immeasurably #(even after all he’s suffered from it)#but refuses to ever take credit for it #jason todd #red hood #red hood: the lost days #lost days #dc

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puhpandas · 5 months

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Veering Off Course

(2,305 words)

Gregory and his family get a call that Vanessa, whos in a different state for college, has gotten hurt. Gregory calls Evan, and Evan is able to use the things he's learned about himself since meeting Gregory to help his friend with his emotions regarding the situation.

Its early in the morning on a Saturday when Evan gets the call. It woke him up, so all he does is blink groggily and swipe at the screen blindly while propped up on his elbow until his thumb hits 'answer' on his phone. "Hello?"

"Evan." It's Gregory, and the serious tone to just that single word clears up Evan's brain as fast as lightning. He scrambles to prop himself into sitting up and rubs at his eyes with one hand.

"Gregory?" Evan asks, looking at the little icon he set for Gregory's contact of a picture of Evan and him at an amusement park. "Is everything okay?"

It takes a second for Gregory to respond, and it causes the anxiety that had steadily began to bubble inside of him to surge. "Gregory?"

"Sorry." Gregory finally answers. "I-- Uh... can you..." His friend struggles for words, and Evan tries to be as patient as possible as it becomes clearer every second something is wrong. "Can you come over? Like right now?"

Evan flounders for words for a second, but manages to force his mouth to say, "Of course."

"Okay." Gregory replies, and a surge of worry shoots through his chest when Gregory sounds like he might cry. He takes a breath on the other end, then, "Please hurry."

After that, Evan only lingers enough to respond with a short confirmation and goodbye before hanging up the phone. It takes him record time to shoot out of bed, sling on some shoes, and get down the street a few houses to Gregory's own.

His mind had played multiple awful scenarios of what terrible thing could have happened the entire time, but his worry does not ebb when he makes it to the porch and knocks on the door to a teary eyed Gregory.

Evan's immediately herded inside. Freddy has his phone in his hand pressed up against his ear, and he's pacing around the room. Aunt Chica and Aunt Roxy sit in the living room. Bonnie is sat in a dragged-over dining chair by Freddy and frowning.

It's dead silent in the house; even the TV and seemingly endless energy flowing through and causing bustling noise is snuffed out to nothing. Evan watches as everyone sits completely seriously and quiet, hands held in their lap or thrumming against something.

Impatience, is what Evan first thinks of. They're waiting for something. News, maybe? Freddy is on the phone. It's so silent you could hear a pin drop. Or somebody else's phone vibrate.

Evan's dread and anxiety only get worse when Gregory shuts the door behind him and tugs on him a bit. Evan follows without struggle, thousands of words and questions on his tongue when Gregory leads him to one of the unoccupied seats in the living room; a loveseat.

He sits down with him, and Gregory's face is scrunched up in barely restrained worry. Evan watches his friend, who's been an anchor for himself for so long, tremble and hunch in on himself. "Gregory?"

Gregory's eyes dart to him, and Evan leans down, hunching forward with his elbows rested on his thighs like theyre their own personal bubble. Evan's own brows furrow, and he feels the familiar thickness in his throat just at watching his friend be upset.

Evan grabs at his hand, squeezing it tight and lacing their fingers together. "I'm really worried, Gregory... please tell me whats wrong." Evan pleads. "Please?"

Gregory nods unsurely after a moment, and Evan watches him swallow thickly before turning to him fully. "Dad got a call from the University of Oregon today."

Evan's brows raise, but he nods to keep going. The University of Oregon is the college Gregory's sister, Vanessa, had left home to go attend. Evan hasnt gotten the chance to meet her, yet. She's already been gone two years strong, with a seemingly bright future. Evan's heard Gregory and his family talk about her enough to know her talents.

Gregory's breath hitches, and Evan wraps his other hand around Gregory's, the one he already has ahold of. He sandwiches it in-between his own and hopes it's enough comfort.

"Somebody called us and told us Vanessa got into a car crash today. On campus."

It's like a bucket of ice water is poured on Evan's head. His feet go cold, and his eyes widen to saucers. Fear shoots like an arrow through his stomach. When he stops reeling from the news, he watches Gregory begin to shake and lose the carefully gathered composure he'd put up since Evan arrived.

"They said..." Gregory's brows are furrowed so much it looks like it hurts. Theres a clench in his jaw and a wetness to his eyes Evan isnt used to. "They said she's already been taken to the hospital and is in surgery." He frowns, and theres a twist in his lip that Evan is so familiar with. "They... a-all we can do is wait. They told us they'd let us know any updates."

The house is thrown back into such jarring silence after Gregory stops talking that Evan's ears start ringing. Which makes it clear as day when Gregory's breath turns harsh beside him.

Evan tears his eyes away from the floor and ignores the twisting feeling in his chest to look at his friend. He has his face buried in the hand that isnt held by Evan and is shaking in a way where you can tell theyre trying so hard to keep it together. Gregory's angled away from him, but Evan can see the panic on his face even from where he can see.

Evan's breath hitches, and the thickness in his throat begins to turn into burning as he scootches closer to Gregory on the couch and sets a hand on his shoulder. He tugs a bit until Gregory gets the message and let's him wrap his arms around his middle and hold him close.

Gregory makes some sort of horrible, upsetting hitching noise that causes the dam to break for Evan, before he sort of flops against him and brings up his own arms to clutch at his T-Shirt. Gregory's head thumps against his shoulder, and it's one of the only times Evan really becomes aware of the height he has on his friend.

"Its okay..." Evan says into Gregory's shoulder, because it's all he knows to do in the moment. He glances around and sees that Gregory's family has shifted to the dining room, leaving them alone. Evan finally feels the tears slip from his eyes as he presses closer, hugging him like his life depends on it. "Its okay, Gregory. It'll be okay."

"It's--" Gregory says, and Evan can hear how much his voice shakes with barely contained tears. "Its not. I can't-- We can't even go see her. We can't go and wait for her to wake up, or anything... we just have to--" He cuts himself off, and Evan feels Gregory shake harshly against him.

"We just have to sit here." Gregory says, voice thick. "I dont know what to do, Evan. I don't know what to do."

And its only that sentence that causes Evan to grapple at what to do, if his friend can't. And all he can think about is how himself would react if it were Gregory getting hurt.

All he'd be able to do is cry, he realizes. He wouldnt be able to do anything. Just wait and be scared.

But that's what Gregory is getting at, isnt he? He can't do anything. That's the thing. Evan has known Gregory long enough to get him. To know, him. Evan knows that Gregory doesnt sit around and cry like Evan does. He prefers to get up and do something about whatevers wrong.

Hes a problem solver instead of waiting around. A fighter instead of a crier. No wonder hes so bent out of shape about this. To have a loved one in danger, and when you're so used to getting up and making a plan to fix a problem and are forced to sit in standby...

Evan eases them down against the cushion of the couch, not once untangling themselves from eachother. Gregory shakes, but he does not cry. "So what would you do if you could?"

The hair from Gregory's bangs brushes against Gregory's neck as he moves his head. "I'd... I don't know. I'd at least try to get to her." Gregory says, voice unbelievably quiet. "At least get to her. Then figure it out from there. Just so I'm not waiting on phone calls."

Evan nods against him, his chin scrunching up Gregory's hair. His tears have long since stopped falling, but he knows he has dry tracks on his cheeks. "You have a plan."

Gregory makes some sort of noise that would sound like a snort in any other circumstances. "I would if I could." Gregory replies, squeezing his arms a bit tighter. "But I cant" He sighs, shuddering and heavy. "I just have to wait."

Evan hums. "You're worried, and you're stressed." He makes the same noise Gregory just did. "I know how you feel... I really do. Maybe not your exact situation, but... I get what it's like to feel helpless." He says. "You know what I would do?"

Gregory hums this time, questionative. Evan rubs circles into his back. "I'd sit there and wait, and wish for it to different. And when it wouldnt be, I'd cry."

Gregorys head shifts against that crook between Evan's chin and chest, almost like hes trying to look him in the eye but the hug prevents him from being able.

"All I ever did was cry." Evan says when Gregory doesnt respond. "Its the only thing that I could do to cope."

"...So..." Gregory asks, and his voice is thick again. "You mean..."

"You're stressed." Evan answers. "You're stressed and you're worried. So... why dont you let it out?"

Evan, out of anyone, knows how valuable emotions can be. He didnt, once upon a time. When everyone would just tell him how annoying it is. How useless it is. How he's asking for it. How he should have toughened up by now. When instead of comfort, he'd receive ridicule and prodding.

That's changed. Ever since a certain someone entered his life. He doesn't think of his emotions, himself so little anymore. So worthless. So maybe that's why Gregory perks up ever so slightly in understanding.

And that's all it takes.

Gregory's trembling turns into shoulder shaking sobs like the snap of a finger. He cries, open and unadulterated, and Evan just hugs him close and rubs his back, offering reassurances like Gregory has done for him so many times.

His own eyes burn when his best friends sobs are heard so openly and he can feel every shudder of his body. Evan's chin scrunches, and the tears fall right along with Gregory as Evan hugs him close, tucking his face into his hair.

"Im--" Gregory cries. "I-Im just so worried about her."

"I know." Evan responds, his own voice breaking as he pets Gregory's hair. His shirt is damp with tears but he doesnt care. "Itll be okay. It'll all be okay."

They stay like that for a while, and Evan can tell Gregory needs it. He needs it. The worry he felt that morning doesnt ever really leave, and it stays ever-present as Evan watches his friend fall apart. They stay stuck together like magnets, eventually only shoulder to shoulder with linked hands on the loveseat, and none of Gregory's family try to peel them apart when they eventually wander back into the living room.

They stay in a state of constant agonizing limbo all day. At 8:00pm, Freddy calls it a night. Gregory protests immediately, but Aunt Roxy calms him down almost seamlessly and convinces him to go to bed.

Of course, Evan follows him. He cant imagine a world where he doesnt. The air mattress stays deflated in Gregory's closet as it has been most of the time nowadays. All Evan has to do is kick his shoes off since he left home in his pajamas anyway and they're wrapped around eachother, tucked in Gregory's bed under his comforter in the dark.

Gregory is silent all throughout the night, even though Evan knows he's awake. Evan just hopes that... he did the right thing. Something knows is that suppressing how you feel isnt good. It never works. No matter how much you want it to.

Gregory taught him that. He just wants to return the favor. Not because he owes Gregory, no. Gregory has long since hammered it into Evan's thick skull that he has nothing to pay him back for. That his kindness is not a deed to Evan, but rather that Evan himself deserves to be treated kindly.

Gregory does, too. Evan knows this with all his heart. Gregory is his best friend and has done more for him than anyone else ever has.

Evan... all Evan did was change. Change for the better. And hopefully he helped the most important person in his life with the things he learned. The things that person taught him.

He hugs Gregory's middle a little tighter, not daring to break the silence. Gregory needs time, but doesn't want to be alone. Evan understands. He does. He just hopes to convey what he truly feels through the one action.

Thank you. I'm here for you. I'll always be here. You're my best friend. I'm so glad you trust me. I trust you as well. So much.

Gregory himself wraps his arms tighter around Evan in turn, and Evan feels like the single movement lso has a deeper meaning he cant read.

They dont speak. They just lay in silence until eventually they fall asleep, stuck together like two puzzle pieces.

ao3 link

#this oneshot is mostly just to focus more on gregorys character and how i imagine him (not headcanon #his actual canon character) to handle problems.#ive always seen gregory as instead of letting fear/emotions take over #he pushes past to get a task done/fix whatevers wrong. so i wanted to translate that into the flashlight duo universe with the emotional/pr #especially because of how important emotions are to evans growth and how gregory is the reason for that growth #and i also just wanted to finally write a bit of evan helping gregory since ive written so much vice versa.#i needed something for gregory to be super worried over and well. this universe is already family centric. poor vanessa.#its a normal ass world okay theres not much i can do #vanessa is okay btw.#the next day theyre supposed to get news about surgery and recovery and plan to go on a road trip to oregon to see her while she recovers #(i actually already wrote some of it but cut it out because i didnt like where it was going.#just veered (ha) too far away from the core of the fic)#so you can imagine that happening.#anyways hope you enjoyed! still need a better idea to showcase evan helping gregory but i think this is okay for now.#i have some other plans for this duo (as always) having to do with love languages so im excited about that.#lets see how long itll take me to actually write it lol #pandas writes #my fics #flashlight duo #flashlight duo oneshots #gregory #evan #the fazbears #oneshot #kinda feel like this is cringe #but whatever im cringe and im free two cakes etc #not my favorite work ive done but whatever #its okay

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softestaries · 6 months

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The idea of Alphard Black silently judging all of Tom Riddle's potential villain names while sat next to him in 6th year transfiguration class brings me too much joy. Just image the BOMBASTIC side-eye he'd give when Tom settles on 'I am Lord Voldemort'.

#Alphard Black #tom riddle #Alphard: idk I think Darrel Doom Vomit had great potential #Tom: fuck off Black #Just Alphard watching his rage-filled dorm-mate make a master plan to take over the wizarding world like: that is NONE of my buisness #to be fair #what teenager doesn't plot world domination at least once?#Alphard Black and Tom Riddle #marauders #the noble and most ancient house of black #harry potter

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kissmefriendly · 1 year

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Wait. I just realised that Johnathan and Mina will get to grow old together but more than that, they’ll most likely get to live to see a man walk on the moon. These two, who have fought ancient supernatural powers and won will get to see a human walk on the surface of the moon. And Mina will remember the first time she used a typewriter and she’ll see, on an electric box in her home, live footage of people in space communicating in real time with earth. They effectively saved the world from the supernatural powers of darkness, but did they ever think they would witness this??

#I’ve been thinking about this for weeks #they’d be well into their 90s by still!#my great gran saw her first light bulb and the moon walk in her lifespan #guys it’s making me emotional!#them and their great grandchildren!#ALSO!#what’s even more emotional is if one of them outlived the other and they’re just thinking about what the other would have to say #what they’d be feeling #and the isolation of experiencing the world change at breakneck speed #but also they joy in having lived it and being able to witness humanity keep going!#dracula was gonna take over the world that was his plan and they stopped it #these saviours of humanity now get to silently watch the world do things not even THEY could have imagined!#dracula daily #dracula #mina harker #johnathan harker

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neurotonic · 1 month

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mmm just character thoughts don't mind me. I was initially hesitant to give my Phoenix too much characteristics that make them more than what we see in the game. I wanted to stick to focusing on their present as this silly do-gooder protagonist with simple motivations (a la Mr. No-Backstory Phoenix Wright Aceattorney. THAT'SRIGHT!! I DIDN'T JUST STOP WITH THE HAIR WAHHA /j)

which is why I didn't want to give them an actual real name for a long time.. the moment I do that is the moment they're someone unique entirely. Which isn't a bad thing! For some reason I just wanted to stick it to the simplicity. But I guess making them half-asian working for a company that's (mainly? i assume?) based in the US in the 60's already entails a lot of implications. Also I was really proud of thinking up of a real name for them which is why I put it on that one art I did for them.

All that to say is ... I'm close to deciding on going all-in with my Phoenix's characterization, backstory and all. I could... PROBABLY manage to connect their weird talent of not dying to it but. It's silly for the sake of being silly so. probably not.

What I've got so far is that they're an overseas filipino worker who, after jumping across multiple jobs (none of them sticking too long), accidentally wanders into one of the buildings of the Agency. They somehow get accepted and it doesn't take long for them to realize that they're a spy now. Surprisingly, they like the thrill. They really Did Not Expect to suddenly be saving the world but it's fine. It's fine!

#they also didn't. plan on settling down the us for family reasons #though by the end of the 1st game i think the Agency granted them citizenship bc they're an asset now #. idk the right terms i should search things more #i was going to go over how the politics work in this damn world #like. GENUINE QUESTION... do 'presidents' still exist? at least as like #one tier below the world leaders. since they Still take the time #to differentiate all the countries within the four world powers #because if so. my god. there's like . something historic happens in the PH in the 60's and im like #do i want to factor that to my silly littl agent #things are different in this world obvi #cant stop thinking about the implications lol #anyways #gene rambles #agent phoenix

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starker-sorbet · 1 year

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Tony and Peter had been friends ever since they had first met at a playground when they were five years old. They’d stuck together through thick and thin; from Peter losing his uncle during a drug store robbery, to when Howard killed himself and Tony’s mom while driving drunk. Nothing had come between them in the decade they had known each other.

So when Tony found evidence on Obadiah Stane's computer about organizing a hit on him in order to gain control of SI before he could claim his inheritance and start on his plans to leave the weapons business behind, he immediately went to Peter for advice. Tony told him about what had started as a bit of fun to see what embarrassing things his mentor had as his internet history had turned into a shocking betrayal and a horrifying discovery that shook the foundation of everything he knew. But luckily for Tony he had Peter to anchor him and it wasn’t long before they had a plan of action figured out. It meant that they needed to get Ned and MJ involved but the pair were more than happy to help when they saw what Stane was planning. The man had gone to all the trouble of organizing a plan to kill Tony so MJ suggested why not use that same plan against him. It would just be a waste otherwise.

It wasn’t until three years later that they finally had the means to protect each other and to possibly provide the means to exert their control over others to avoid another Stane, extremis.

And with Tony’s new iron armors that he and Peter created for themselves (as well as plans of armors for Ned and MJ if they ever wanted them but that was it, no one else could be trusted) they could truly protect each other from a world that seemed so intent on harming them. Just in time it seemed, with the annoyance that was SHIELD raising its head once more with a new ‘superhero’ team being sent out to stop them. The Avengers, or some equally ridiculous name, was what the pair thought they were called.

Honestly after they dismantled the organization following Tony and Ned discovering that they were basically Hydra with a new name both Peter and Tony thought that would be the last anyone heard of them. But no, they had to be difficult and send out some poor saps to stop them from ‘taking over the world’ or some such nonsense. Tony and Peter were just wanting to make the world safe couldn’t SHIELD understand that. Yet there was SHIELD’s Captain America lookalike (or clone Tony wasn’t sure) declaring them villains

. And sure their plans could be heavy handed sometimes but they ran everything past Ned and MJ anyway as they knew that the pair would provide a more calm and level headed viewpoint (Both Peter and Tony knew that they could get carried away) and they never really objected to any of their goals

#starker #same age au #extremis!tony #extremis!peter #peter and tony being unaware that yes they are totally taking over the world #and no ned and mj aren’t functioning as a failsafe to stop this #ned and mj are in fact rooting for said global takeover #and actively helping with their own ideas #it is the real cap but as ‘everyone knows cap died in ww2’ he must be like a lookalike #or clone if your tony #also wanted to include the reason tony and ned were hacking shield was because romanoff tried to infiltrate si like in canon #but in doing so tried to poison peter to get close to tony thinking peter was just his pa like pepper #not realizing they run the place together #obviously it failed because extremis #but it pissed off tony and ned big time #and them finding hydra underneath shields exterior was a fortuitous excuse to do what they already planned and to take them down #moodboard #my moodboard

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