#my reading thoughts

[pinebambi]

I've been reading the School for Good and Evil trilogy for the past week and I am just absolutely baffled by the books. I'm not certain if its bad writing or maybe I'm just not the target audience but Sophie is the most unsympathetic character I've ever read. Since the first book when  Agatha and Sophie were introduced I was so confused on how the two could be friends. It seemed obvious to me that Sophie was a manipulative and mean friend to Agatha, and we were just being told they are friends without actually showing us why they are. Maybe thats the whole point, maybe Sophie is meant to be a bad friend and Agatha is just horribly naive because Sophie is her first real friend, but I'm on the third book now and it still feels like its pushing a narrative that Sophie can be Good and is someone you'd want to be around. She just seems like the most selfish, self-serving manipulative character I've ever seen written, and she's still convinced SHE  deserves Tedros and that Agatha should be the one alone. Yet, I obviously have to be missing something because everytime i look for other opinions on these books It's people talking about Sophie and Agatha's friendship, so obviously there has to be some redemption for her , right? I've not yet finished the 3rd book yet, only having just reached the point where Agatha tells Tedros to go with Sophie alone for the next two days and I can only groan in annoyance because its like Agatha can't simply explain how she feels to Sophie. Honestly, I don't want to see Sophie redeemed. I want Agatha to finally tell her off and grow a backbone, but I know how unlikely that is. Sadly, I do want to see how the series will end, so I will be finishing this book and probably the next two as well, but I am losing my marbles. I'm really hoping i'll finish the third book and look back on this post and laugh at what I was missing, but i just dont know what they could add the would make me like Sophie's character

#the school for good and evil #the school for good and evil books #agatha sge #sophie sge #tedros sge #my reading thoughts

[cemeterything]

are we still doing this because i have a late submission

#🐉 #this is less about fan content and more about that awful lazy one size fits all #'10 years later theyre happily married with a cute little nuclear family' trope #because ive read some genuinely incredible fics about characters who would Not fucking have kids #ending up with accidental pregnancy scares or child acquisitions that get treated with all the nuance #and thoughtful handling they deserve #but also. i reread one of my favourite fics yesterday and when one character jokingly brought up the idea of children #and the other reacted with genuine visceral disgust and said what hideously awful parents theyd be #i lit up like a fucking christmas tree

[cottonspotten]

*person has consented to being eaten; they’ve donated their body. they died without suffering. you can cook the meat. you will not get sick from the meat.

bonus: explain why!

#reblog for sample size etc etc #personally i would absolutely try human meat if given the chance #poll #polls #cannibalism #cottons thoughts #pinned #<- insane first post to read if youve only just discovered my blog but i want results!!! i want numbers and sample!! #cannibalism tw

[stil-lindigo]

lead balloon (the tumblr post that saved me)

if this comic resonated with you, it would mean the world to me if you donated to this palestinian family's escape fund.

--

no creative notes because this isn't that kind of comic.

I know I don’t owe any of you anything but I still felt compelled to write about my long term absence. And I feel far enough away from the dangerous spot I was in to be able to make this comic. I have a therapist now, and she agreed that making this could be a very cathartic gesture, and the start of properly leaving these thoughts behind me. I am still, at seemingly random times, blindsided by fleeting desires to kill myself. They’re always passing urges, but it’s disarming, and uncomfortable. I worry sometimes that my brain’s spent so long thinking only about suicide that it’s forgotten how to think about anything else. Like, now that I've opened that door for myself, I'll never be able to fully shut it again. But I’m trying my best to encourage my mind in other directions. We'll see how that goes.

I am still donating all proceeds from my store to Palestinian causes. So far, I've donated over $15K, not including donations coming from my own pocket or the fundraising streams which jointly raised around $10K. In the time since I made my initial post about where this money would be going, the focus has shifted from aid organisations to directly donating to escape funds.

If you'd like to do the same, you can look at Operation Olive Branch, which hosts hundreds of Palestinian escape funds or donate to Safebow, which has helped facilitate the safe crossing and securing of important medical procedures for over 150 at-risk palestinians since the beginning of the genocide.

#cw: suicidal ideation #cw: suicide #cw: self harm #cw: mental health #cw: depression #i made the balloon the main representation of my self destructive urges for a reason but im not going to explain it #i tried to keep a lot of the details in this vague #it would be my worst nightmare if this comic encouraged someone to hurt themselves #so. please dont #for a long time even the thought of making this comic felt so insipid and narcissistic #with the state of the world as it is #having the only threat to your life be yourself felt so privileged and trite and shameful #but doing this comic made me sit down and process things in full #and im just. very grateful i didn't give in to my thoughts back when i sincerely felt i'd be more useful to the world dead #i also feel the need to say that this wont represent everyone's battle with mental illness. its unfortunately different for all of us #there is no fix-all #and im afraid this might be one of those comics that either resonates a lot or misses the target by a mile #i made it for myself foremost. and now that its done im glad i did it #thank you for reading #and please stay alive #stillindigo art #stillindigo comics

[clarisse-doodles]

inspired by this post, in which Damian does not know what Vine is

#sorry this was funnier in my head #but after i read that post I COULD NOT STOP THINKING ABOUT IT #gen z batkids is the most Cursed thing i've read today and i love it #at first i had so many Thoughts about how my brain CANNOT reconcile tim as anything but a 90s kid but then i read that line about damian and #i feel like they'd mess with him sometimes by randomly quoting memes in unison #almost started to overthink how in This Particular Timeline jason might have missed out on this meme because he was Not Alive #but for the purposes of this silly joke i choose to believe dates are irrelevant #that is all thank you #clarisse doodles #batfam #damian wayne #dick grayson #jason todd

[lgbtlunaverse]

There's a version of the "don't go grocery shopping while hungry" rule specifically for writers where you should never under any circumstances be allowed to touch your draft within 3 hours of reading a really good story. Because sometimes when you read something great your head goes "fuck this is so much better than my stuff I should make that more like THIS instead!" Look at me. That's the devil talking and you should close the document NOW.

#you will make superficial edits that do not gell well with the rest of your work #and won't actually capture what you thought was so good about that story #close the doc. sit down. think about it for a while. inspiration is fine. getting a 'eureka' moment from another story is fine #but if you find yourself comparing your work one to one with someone else's and taking any differences to be flaws on your part then STOP #you will never write good stuff by trying to make it look less like you wrote it #writing #writing advice #guess who just had to go into her google doc history and undo a bunch of panic-induced edits #because she read a fic about the same characters she's writing for? #meeee. they aged badly within just a few hours of hindsight. learn from my mistakes #self-hatred is not a good motivation for creation #fic writing

[blueboyluca]

“When I first heard it, from a dog trainer who knew her behavioral science, it was a stunning moment. I remember where I was standing, what block of Brooklyn’s streets. It was like holding a piece of polished obsidian in the hand, feeling its weight and irreducibility. And its fathomless blackness. Punishment is reinforcing to the punisher. Of course. It fit the science, and it also fit the hidden memories stored in a deeply buried, rusty lockbox inside me. The people who walked down the street arbitrarily compressing their dogs’ tracheas, to which the poor beasts could only submit in uncomprehending misery; the parents who slapped their crying toddlers for the crime of being tired or hungry: These were not aberrantly malevolent villains. They were not doing what they did because they thought it was right, or even because it worked very well. They were simply caught in the same feedback loop in which all behavior is made. Their spasms of delivering small torments relieved their frustration and gave the impression of momentum toward a solution. Most potently, it immediately stopped the behavior. No matter that the effect probably won’t last: the reinforcer—the silence or the cessation of the annoyance—was exquisitely timed. Now. Boy does that feel good.”

— Melissa Holbrook Pierson, The Secret History of Kindness (2015)

#dog books #this chapter was very sad reading #when you become aware of punishment #and its use and its prevalence #it's hard not to despair #again this is why positive reinforcement feels like absolution #maybe now my eyes are open I can make up for what I did #what I did because it's what everyone does #because it's more acceptable to punish than to do anything else #I've been having so many thoughts about punishment and society and justice #this book was very validating #another great validating moment in my jumbled thoughts #was listening to the You're Wrong About episode on justice #with Amanda Knox #it helped to ease the despair a little

[majunju]

"girlfriend" (more ab rielle here)

#twisted wonderland #thought ab it for a very long time. rielle would be cv tetsuya kakihira 100% (my deluded fancast) isnt it so fitting???? #anyways he's very interested in human customs and the idea of “dating” but has 0 knowledge outside of the romance novels he reads

[weaselmcdiesel]

i was being so so so real when i said id make more katnep comics

#but this one isnt funny. >:) #it's SWEET #my art #fan art #homestuck #karkat #karkat vantas #nepeta #nepeta leijon #katnep #karnep #nepkat #i am not used to limiting my palette im still experimenting! #i hope the colors i chose arent stupid i think theyre nice #if no one can tell what's in the poster it's the miniature tigers album poster #idk i thought maybe shed like it idk #also if it's hard to read kk's apron it says #cull the gastrotechnician #ummm this is an au where they live together uhhhh and also trolls have beds ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ #idk

[brain-deadx0]

My 5yo nephew made this. Its his first "sewing"

#READ TAGS READ TAGS PLEASE #its an alien space ship #he wanted to know what the people on my phone thought of it #embroidery

[moodyseal]

I was poking fun at how unexpectedly silly the CHB kids looked in armour in the first two episodes of the PJO show (acting like an almighty army and all) and then it hit me. This is exactly how some of them will look like when they will be dying in the final battle. Silly. Tiny. Literal children

#i'm sorry i always knew that they were children but #when i read books the characters' ages. idk. don't really register completely #maybe it's because i know their internal pov and don't hear their voices or see them #but these are. 12 y/os #fighting things #and only now that i see an actual live action rendition of pjo do i realize the weight of it all #they're so young oh my god #percy jackson #pjo #pjo tv show #lonely thoughts

[biomechabird]

Despite everything, it's still you.

#kieran #pokemon #sorry i know this is badly formatted but i only really made it for personal reasons but then thought hey maybe someone else might need this #yes im sorry the first image having a different outfit bugs me so much but it's the only one i had in my screenshots with that expression #why am i even saying sorry JUST TAKE THIS IF YOU LIKE IT and if you don't... bye #hello if you're reading the tags

[number1abbasupporter]

Sirius: i’m gay

James: that’s cool mate

James: everyone has gay thoughts though

Remus:

Peter:

Sirius:

Remus: boy do i have news for you

#i love the trope of bisexuals not realizing that not everyone has gay thoughts #it’s so funsies #this was basically inspired by the hand that feeds #my first fic i read 😍 #there was a scene kinda like this but i def think it was diff #i barely remember #marauders era #marauders #james potter #sirius black #bisexual james potter #remus lupin #james & peter & remus & sirius #hp marauders #marauders fandom #incorrect marauders quotes

[timetravelingtoamess]

Im reading the iliad for this first time and im going to die priam is out here like "who is that short, hairy man" and helens like "thats odysseus" and hes just like "damn thats right he was at my house"

#the iliad #odysseus #homer #greek mythology #greek literature #live read #sorry #but youre all going to hear #my thoughts #this is my journal

[tea-cat-arts]

More doodles (ft Xianle Trio mostly Feng Xin)

#heaven official's blessing #heaven official's blessing fanart #tgcf #tgcf fanart #xianle trio #xie lian #feng xin #mu qing #hua cheng #hualian #idk how Feng Xin ended up in the most panels given he's probably my least favorite of the trio #oh well #there will be more doodles later #thought i had while drawing this: do you think they gave Mu Qing his slutty little choker as a reference to the shackle he gets later on? #i might be reading too much into that #didnt let myself interact with the fandom till i finished the books #so i got a lot of catch up doodles to do now

[hinata-boke]

sanji-kun!!

#my art #one piece #sanji #whos this???? #i actually got possessed to draw this i was supposed to be studying #first 'real' time drawing op! not including scribbles in the margins of my notes!!! #my friend was scared for me to read op bc she thought i might hate sanji bc hes annoying lol #he is annoying but hes also my fav i think so that worked out