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runbymachinesandclones · 2 years

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Reading my year away: 2021 Edition

This is a day late but you know me, I’m the queen of procrastination. But I have spent some time doing this and it would be a shame if I just deleted it because of timing. So, here you have it.

I’m what you could call, an avid reader. A few years ago, I used to devour books each year but it has been a while since I have been motivated enough to pick a new book (hope I feel like it this year, tho). But recently, fanfic reading has become a form of comfort for me and an activity I do daily (sometimes to the point of messing up my sleeping schedule 😅).

I got curious about how many words I managed to read this year so, I started making some numbers this past week. Turns out, I somehow read 3,422,988 words this year… For perspective, that’s almost 10 times reading Don Quixote by Miguel de Cervantes, the most read novel in my mother tongue. And that is without counting fic rereads (which were plenty this year) and fics that I liked but didn’t save on my phone because I’m not planing to revisit them in the future, so the number might be a bit closer to 5M) I don’t know if it is a lot but I enjoyed every single one of them. Their different combinations reminded me about how much I love stories and reading.

I have rambled many times via tags about how much fanfic meant to me last year (seriously, thank you again fanfic writers of the world, I owe you my sanity this year 💜)

So, now it’s time for me to share my favorite fanfics that I read in 2021 and also my favorite WIPs that I look forward to seeing more from in 2022. They are all from The Old Guard fandom, which is my latest obsession, as many of you know.

List under the cut:

2021 FAVORITES

White Sun Summers by davaia

A beautiful post-canon fic in which Joe and Nicky heal from what happened at Merrick’s. It is full of hurt/comfort which I love and the flashbacks of their past are very well interwoven throughout the story. It is a lovely story and one that I have reread many times.

What Wise Men Fear by itsmylifekay & velociraptorerin

As a fan of Patrick Rothfuss’ novels, this one caught my eye because of the title. The quote fits Nicky so well and the shifting POV is perfect to explore how Nile, Nicky, and Joe experience the events of this fic.

So close that your eyes close (as I fall) by No_Illusions

This one destroyed me but I loved it. I remember I bawled my eyes out and even said so in the comments. I’m only able to read Joe “losing” Nicky if the author promises it is not permanent. And thankfully, that’s the case in this one.

When the Scorched of the Earth Come Back By Sea by BecauseWhateverAtAll

This is a sequel to By a Time to Rise and a Time to Fall, which I read in 2020. I really enjoyed it.

Missed You By a Few Minutes, a Few Centuries by just_another_tinker

This one is widely known and I saw it being recommended here so I gave it a try. Oh boy… The feels, the angst, the pining, the secrets, the found family. Everything about this canon divergence is perfect. I laughed, I cried, I cheered. I also enjoyed the rest of the works of this series (Missed you, in case anyone is interested).

Take me instead by Fuinixe

Febuwhump saw many great entries made by the writers in this fandom but I think this one is my favorite. Nicky protecting Joe from the Spanish Inquisition with the art of deception.

Your Kiss by spacewitchqueen

This one is ultra special to me! I prompted Brielle to write “Kisses when they’re mad” for Joe and Nicky and she came up with this beauty. It takes place in Mexico City (it isn’t outright stated but all the little clues she wrote drove me to that conclusion) and basically has Joe kissing Nicky after the AWFUL day he had while shadowing their latest mark. I still think about this one all the time when I have bad days on the subway. Wish I had my Joe to kiss the troubles away!

I Found Peace in Your Violence by Kiaya

I think this one is the first AU I read in this fandom. I don’t usually do it because I’m not that much of a fan of changing everything around the characters I’m invested in but I have become obsessed with Joe/Nicky to the point where I would read AUs and actually enjoy them. This one was really good, especially a scene in the last chapter that is full of delicious angst between them. I recently reread it because I remember how my heart was crushed by all the fic but that scene in particular and I felt the same way the second time around. It is super well written and oozing yearning!!

Saltwater Sonata by pinstripedJackalope

Another amazing canon-divergence in which Nicky is the one who was thrown in the Iron maiden instead of Quynh. Loved Joe and Nile bonding with each other as they sailed the seas to find Nicky. My favorite chapters are the ones set after they find him and we watch Nile and Joe help Nicky through the aftermath. Planing on rereading this one soon.

On the Threshold of Eternity by Ailendolin

Nicky looking out for Andy through Nile’s POV. As much as I love the Andy&Joe and Nicky&Quynh relationships, I also have a soft spot for Nicky&Andy. And this fic delivers. Family feels ensue.

Time Flies by firbolg_boyfriends

The domesticity and fluff are strong with this one. I think it is one of my favorite fics depicting the Guard in their down time, just doing things for the joy of it. Basically, Nile spending quality time with Joe and Nicky in Spain while she processes the changes in her life. Andy joins them for a lovely scene in the terrace toward the end! It is also one of those fics in which you learn things, so I really loved it!

What God Gave You, He Gave to Me by LittleRedCosette

Where do I even start? This one broke me. It is soooooo well written. It is another canon-divergence, in which Nicky is captured by Merrick Sr. way before Nile becomes immortal. With the help of her dreams, they search for Nicky. Angsty as hell but with a happy ending. I sobbed many times. It is so perfect and it has a sequel (prequel? To Turn From Following) in which we see what was going on with Nicky through the most recent years he was taken via Keane’s POV.

Our Lives Are Colored The Same by DjDangerLove

Yusuf and colors and Nicky helping him find his way back when his memory fails him for a few terrifying moments. It is so soft and speaks volumes about how well they know each other because of everything they have been through together.

Endless Ocean by Isabelle Hemlock & LumusWinter

The longest fic I read this year by far (almost 250k words of my final count come from here). I started this late and also at a time in which I didn’t quite looked out for AUs but I gave this a try because I got curious about what Bodyguard!AUs were about and I do not regret it one bit. I had such a great time reading this fic and I remember waiting impatiently for Wednesdays to see the newest update. I also left some of my longest comments ever after many updates, I just had so much to yell about. It has some great Joe/Nicky moments but it is also very whumpy and angsty, which I really love. I do believe people can heal but it takes time and the people around you to get there.

Sword and Scimitar by TheUsagi1995

Canon-divergence in which Nicky makes Merrick angry with some comment, so he is tortured and brainwashed. Joe frightened for him after they escape made my heart hurt so bad. I could feel his desperation through this writer’s telling of this story. Really good angst all around.

Fight ‘til the day that i die by incurableromancer

This one and its sequel Rendezvous are chef’s kiss when it comes to dialogue and the language used in the writing. I think I haven’t read anything that feels like this before. This AU has Joe as a vigilante and Nicky as a thief who fall in love. Includes some dramatic scenes that seem to have come out of a comic. Super enjoyable from start to finish.

Everything Hurts by Twi_Writes_Sometimes

I always feel lucky when I find a fic that gets Andy right and this one is one of those few. Andy getting used to a body which is no longer immortal and all the conflicting feelings that entails is beautifully explored in this piece and something of which I wish we had more of. The characterization is on point, imo.

The space where things have been by kaydeefalls

After a mission goes slightly wrong, Nile and Joe are left behind. They do a lot of talking with each other on their way to regroup with the others. It is wholesome to read about Nile trying to make peace with her new life and having the others there to offer her counsel. I love them together (my favorite platonic pairing!) and I love them eating huevos rancheros for breakfast on their way to a safe house where they’ll meet the others.

Nowhere i wish to stay crooked by Prevalent_Masters

Lots of things to love in this AU for someone like me who enjoys reading about people with secrets they are unable to divulge to their significant other which causes everything to end up blowing up in their faces. Joe and Nicky fall in love in this one but neither is completely honest about who they say they are. It is angsty, whumpy, kinky, and has very good team dynamics with the rest of our characters. Waiting for each chapter was painful.

Wistful is the rain by dana_norram

Who could have thought I would finally find an A/B/O fic which I actually liked? This one follows the events from the movie, but with extra feelings in every sense of the word. I’m so glad it had such a satisfying and happy ending because my god, I suffered with them because of the dangling axe over their heads, too afraid about it falling down on their hopes like it had happened to them many times in the past.

Make It Last by in_agony_and_ecstasy

It is time for IronMaiden!Joe and woow, the feels are very real. I loved Joe spending time with Booker while learning with him about the new world. The angst between Nicky and him was so good, too. Also, this is the first fic written in first person that I have ever read and it positively surprised me.

Digging in the Sand by Seethedawn

Cute fic exploring Joe’s birth family and how they used to search for crabs in the sand, just like his father had taught him and his sister. It has several time jumps in which Yusuf and his sister reminisce about it.

Empty as that beating drum by raedear

AU in which both Joe and Nicky are spies working for an agency. This whole series is a pining fest but this one is the pinnacle. While on a mission that goes wrong, they find their way to each other. Lots of misunderstandings, declarations, angst, and comfort by the end. I’m starting to feel the need to reread it because it is amazing. Joe using verses from poems as code phrases and Nicky asking him not to because he didn’t want him wasting them on him because he didn’t feel worthy of them makes me feral.

In the sky of a million stars by dolphin_ring

Post-canon fic in which Nicky takes Nile away for some stargazing to help her decompress. Filled with sweet and fluffy feelings.

L’immortalité dans les jardins des Éternels by Eilisande

The first fanfic I ventured reading in French without turning to Google Translate while doing so. It is a Sandman crossover and is a Nile POV fic in which she meets Death. The other immortals share some insight with her and at the end, Death makes her silent promises to them. ‘Ensemble, promit Death à Nicolò di Genova et Yusuf Al-Kaysani’ lives rent free in my mind.

Homeland by addyke

It’s 2005, Joe and Nicky fly to New York to meet with Andy and Booker but prejudices hold them at the airport for a few hours. Joe is patted down, questioned, and held by airport security while Nicky is unable to do much for him. There’s a beautiful scene at the end in which we can see Joe reflecting about the event and what it means for people who look like him, speak the same language as him, and have the same faith as him. It is poignant and so very real to the point it is disappointing but, same as Joe, I have hope in humanity.

Arrows and Bullets by paupaupi

I’m really enjoying this series (Forever & Always) in which Nile doesn’t go back to rescue the others and is approached sometime later by Quynh, who wants Nile to help her rescue the others from Merrick. It follows these two women in their efforts to track down the team while spending time together and teaching each other things. I think this installment is my favorite so far because it has such a feel good feeling to it while also having some deep conversations. Looking forward to more of this series.

Walk Me Through the Fire by Bedalk05

Canon-divergence in which Joe is the newest immortal. It is filled with angst and has some great family moments as Joe starts his life with the Guard. Plus, it is always good to read getting together fics for these two.

Right where you left me by dreamtiwasanarchitect & liadan14

I read this after it was completed and I so regret not giving it a go earlier. Why? Because it had me guessing all the way through and I love experiencing that in the form of regular updates in which I have the time to theorize and feel the cliffhanger’s force. This canon-divergence, in which Joe and Nicky part ways with Andy after helping her search for Quynh only for her to send Nile their way when she becomes immortal a few years into the future, is really well balanced (BDSM also included). I don’t want to say more, in case someone is reading this and wants to be surprised by the twists and turns the authors managed to pull but, it is such a good read. Also, Joe has a fish pond!

My Dearest, Nicolò by LumosFiatLux

This fluffy one shot is one of my favorites because it involves books and Joe/Nicky being saps in front of Nile. Finding things you lost can be cute! It is sweet and funny and I wish it was longer.

The Most Special Beast by beepbeepsan

I swear, this one checks all the boxes in my book for what I love being explored in fics in terms of characters going through horrible stuff. Happily, I was on board since the author started posting and I could experience it with cliffhangers and all. Andy, Quynh, and Yusuf try to track down Nicolò after he parts ways with Yusuf sometime after his first death. The angstiest and whumpiest thing I read all year, without a doubt. The chapter in which Yusuf spends time with Nicolò in his cell while waiting for Quỳnh and Andromache still makes me get goose bumps. It has such a hopeful ending and I wish we get to see another part in the future.

Wounds such as this by BeesKnees

I’ve read countless post-Merrick fics, but I think this one might actually be my favorite. The angst comes in the form of Nicky losing his memories after the shot to his head. Everything comes back to him slowly, hitting him and Joe with full force. Some very good points were made by the author in this fic. All in all, a very good read.

Planning Makes Perfect by mekana47

This one flew under my radar on 2020 but I found it while checking out other works from this author. This thriller sees Joe and Nicky captured while on a mission and highlights the grave mistake of underestimating Nicky. It is one of those rare Outsider POV stories that works perfectly because it is fun to know more than what the outsider knows about what’s going on.

There’s an ache in you (put there by the ache in me) by pittdpeach

AU filled with so much yearning that I’m surprised it didn’t crush me. I think what makes this one a great story is how very real and raw the characters feel. I know we sometimes turn to fanfic to escape reality but I enjoyed reading the messy relationship Joe and Nicky have in this one. I read it in one go because it was so good I couldn’t put it down. The time shifts score this fic bonus points as well as the impeccable writing.

To leave the warmest bed by Squintern

Another poignant AU in which Nicky and Joe are the epitome of idiots to lovers (and not necessarily in that order). Nicky, a travel journalist, comes back to his hometown for Christmas and spends time with Joe, a romantic artist who’s always there for him while wishing the love of his life will finally choose to stay with him. The phrasing of some bits and the writing overall are exquisite.

Because the night by liadan14

I never thought I would enjoy a courtroom drama AU this much but woooow. This one is filled with angst all the way through and I loved the enemies to lovers trope happening between Joe/Nicky because the circumstances they were thrown into made them get closer. This one has it all: Family drama, cliffhangers, twists, betrayal, friendship, shifting POV, great sex scenes, a beautiful ending. All of this while happening during the pandemic (probably the only fic I’ve read which managed to pull that off by entwining it with the story).

Canticum by ishandahalf

My first time reading Nicky as the newest immortal. It was a delicious slow-burn between Joe/Nicky spiced with Nicky having an existencial crisis over his feelings toward Joe and her new place in life. I also loved reading Joe wanting them to be together so bad after so long being alone while not pushing Nicky before he could process the changes in his life. This one also features great found family moments, especially between Nicky and Nile and there’s a scene between Nicky and Andy that I cherish. The writing was just superb, I left many comments stating my favorite lines from each chapter. Bonus points for stained glass maker Joe !

Home again by demonicneonfishy

This one gave Andy and Quynh the soft reunion they deserve and I really enjoyed how Andy thought she was dreaming/hallucinating Quynh while she was sick only for Nicky to tell her it wasn’t a dream and that she is really there. Beautifully written, too!

TOG Round Robin 2021 by beepbeepsan, dana_norram, goldheartedsky, mekana47, Zephineange.

The last fic I read last year. This is a beautiful exploration of several winter holidays celebrated by the members of the Guard through the years in the form of stories told to Nile. I enjoyed how diverse it was and how close these characters are to each other. It is always good to have some down time.

WIPs I want to read more of in 2022

Because this is getting ridiculously long, I’m just going to list them but know that I have a lot of feelings about them:

The Vanish Zone by Waid

Nor Earth Nor Boundless Sea by Anonymous

See you in your dreams by flightofwonder

If Never Again, If Every Day by gallifreyburning, takiki16

Scene by Scene by mekana47

A Cold War by just_a_winchester

Elevator Song by just_another_tinker

Until the End by ManicRavingsofaLunatic

It Takes An Age by deanniker

Lights Out by Avelera

Shine a Little Light by pavlovee

As certain dark things are to be loved by demonicneonfishy

The Old Guard-Rhyme Time by OldGuardianNewTricks

#tog fanfic #fanfic #fanfiction #reading #2021 year in review #i’m still surprised by how many fics I read this year #thank you from the bottom of my heart fanfic writers of the world 💜💜💜#it was a blast!#nara reads #tog fandom #the old guard

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yunatheintrovert · 3 years

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shot through the heart (and you’re to blame) | Chapter 1 [Russell Adler/Female Bell!Reader Soulmate AU]

As you tapped your foot against the carpeted floor of the conference room to Under Pressure by Queen and David Bowie, you felt your once anxious mind calm down.

For far back as you could remember-which really was just the year 1981-music with your ever trustworthy Walkman had always helped you with...well everything.

It had been one of the reasons you loved that pencil-pushing job in the cubicle at Langley as an intelligence analyst. No unholy amount of paperwork could overcome the clarity you felt at the sound of music blaring through the headset at your ears, drowning out everything else in your world. There was no voices, no ringing in your ears, no screams.

It was all just the consistent sounds of songs you listened to time and time again.

(And as much as you hated to admit it, there was that stubborn bit of hope that refused to die in every song you listened to. Because maybe, just maybe-you had someone out there when you had no one to call your own.)

That stability you found in a world that you knew you had no place in was all thanks to an old acquaintance and now friend. Belikov must have heard from Lazar about the noise complaints from your neighbors. After all, the next time you met him at the scheduled Chicago Cubs’ game, he handed a boxed Sony Walkman WM-5 model with his usual smile under his signature blue Chicago Cubs hat.

As much as you prized your precious Walkman, you couldn’t help but notice how the timing of the mixtapes it played was...uncanny.

Granted, you made the mixtapes yourself. But the MK Ultra program didn’t give you foresight into the future.

You remembered Lazar laughing amusedly at your musings about that. You swore it was true although perhaps that was the paranoia left over the MK Ultra program.

Yet as you sat patiently at the conference table, you couldn’t help but feel a sense of foreboding that punctuated the ringing silence the Walkman had before it moved onto the next song on your mixtape.

SHOT THROUGH THE HEART AND YOU'RE TO BLAME-

As the song you had listened to for years after quite literally getting shot in the heart rang loud and clear in your ears, you registered the doorknob turning across the room.

And suddenly, you just knew.

The song you had listened to for a year while getting as drunk as a fish in bars was coming back to haunt you with a vengeance.

“Oh, for fuck’s sake-” you muttered to yourself, perhaps a bit more loudly than you intended.

Russell Adler walked through that door not a second later.

Even as you swiveled your gaze to the suddenly very fascinating waste basket at the opposite side of the room, you couldn’t help but look at your former...superior out of the corner of your eye.

He was as calm and composed as ever. Signature sunglasses and the ever present cigarette in hand, he looked the same as he did in 1981.

Years ago, you would have admitted that it was frustrating to be ignored that way.

But now, all you could hope for was that he was just here to sit in for the meeting.

If the implanted memories were any indication, Russell Adler always tied up loose ends.

And you were that one loose end that just wouldn’t die.

Quietly sighing to yourself, you soon turned your attention to the briefing that just started. Half of the people you didn’t recognize. But you did notice the familiar figures of Lazar and Belikov sitting in the seats next to Adler.

It must have been some time into the briefing that you felt a forceful nudge at your leg. Turning slightly, you faced your neighbor, recognizing the familiar face.

She was an analyst at the cubicles in Langley as well. Although, she had a fair resume filled with a reasonable amount of fieldwork related to the Eastern Bloc.

“Bell,” she said as you read her lips and the frustrated look in her eyes, “Turn off that damn Walkman.” you assumed she said that in a hiss.

Truth be told, you weren’t exactly popular among the analysts at Langley. You were rather aloof with your quiet lunches in your little cubicle and constant listening to music on your Walkman in the busy hallways.

Suddenly, you saw the analyst’s head turn towards the upper end of the conference table.

And just like before, you simply knew who your “neighbor” was looking at.

“There’s no problem, sir. It’s just her-” You saw the analyst gesture to yourself before she added, “I don’t know if she was paying attention to the briefing.”

There were several times in your line of work that you wish your conversational and social skills were more up to par....and this was one of those times.

You looked at Adler, shrouded in a sparse cloud of smoke with his signature sunglasses on.

“Bell,” was the word you registered all too well.

You felt the gunshot scar on your chest ache in pangs because you heard that word-BellBELLBell-in Vietnam all those years ago-nonono

It wasn’t real. And you had to listen to the advice the shrink gave you.

They were all just surreal dreams.

“Sir?” you quietly inquired, making sure to use the honorific. After all, there never ever was any personal feelings involved in the past and thus formality should be used to distinguish that (and deep down you knew it was for your sake because you had to draw a damn boundary between reality and whatever the hell MK Ultra planted inside you).

For a split second, you could have sworn something crossed his face. Although, you could never tell what he was thinking behind those shades.

“We’ve got a job to do, Bell.” You felt yourself freeze, “What is it?” He was testing you.

Of course.

“Objective is a downed American recon satellite over the Angolan desert. Secure perimeter, destroy sensitive technology, and exfil at 1300. Weapons armament is at our discretion,” you said in clipped statements before adding, “Further details will be assigned to us at a later time.”

Much to the frustration of your “neighbor”, Adler simply nodded approvingly at you in that ever slight way before taking a drag of his cigarette.

Luckily, the briefing was over in around 15 minutes without a hitch.

By the time it was over, your mixtape had already gotten to Tainted Love by Soft Cell and you were already in the middle of jumping out of your chair and making a hopefully subtle dash to the hallway.

From the pain you drive into the heart of me The love we share Seems to go nowhere

Suddenly, you felt a weighted, warm pressure on your shoulder and you instantly twisted around with your hand on the origin of the pressure-

-only for you to blink in consternation at the warm feeling of callused skin against your own.

He’s not wearing gloves, you thought vaguely for a moment as you held Adler’s large callused hand on your shoulder.

Wait-

“Sorry, sir-” you jerked away from him with an apology, “...old habits die hard.”

'What old habits? You had none, not with him.' you kicked yourself mentally.

“You should be more aware of your surroundings.” Ah, yes...The same kind of lecturing you would get in the safehouse when you would listen in on his calls...Granted that somewhat deserved, but it wasn’t like he wasn’t watching over you 24/7 like that time you saw him watching you wander around in the darkroom.

“Yes, sir.” you simply said. It was better to be unnoticed by Adler than it was to piss him off. If you had to be the same devoted obedient subordinate as before, so be it.

There just wouldn’t be any personal feelings involved this time.

(because there were none. It was never personal.)

And I've lost my light For I toss and turn I can't sleep at night

You couldn’t help but feel rather awkward at the silence that lingered in the air.

“If that’s all, I’ll be going now, sir.” you rather sheepishly said before moving to turn to walk away.

“What are you listening to, kid?” Adler asked suddenly.

“What?”

“The song,” he gestured to the Walkman secured at your waist.

“Tainted Love,” you quickly answered, “Soft Cell.”

You could’ve sworn you saw Adler’s lips twitch up ever so slightly in almost a rather smile....or grimace. You could never quite tell with him.

“It’s a good song, Bell.” was all he said before walking away.

And with that exchange, you were left alone and confused in the hallway.

Once I ran to you (I ran) Now, I'll run from you This tainted love you've given

Author’s Note:

This is my first time writing out Adler's character as well as even writing out a Call of Duty fanfic. Hopefully, it turned out okay. My writing is still pretty rusty at the moment.

Anyways, I love writing Soulmate AUs and I found the idea of it to be interesting with a Russell Adler/Bell concept. Aside from my love for Soulmate AUs, I also just had to write out post-canon ending Bell having a Walkman and listening to music all the time with it.

Also, in case anyone is confused, this has a canon-divergence where Bell got non-fatally shot by Adler just before getting pardoned by a high-ranking official for her efforts and then getting a pencil-pushing job as an intelligence analyst at Langley. It's somewhat based on the "happy ending AU idea" post I put on here. It's rather unrealistic but I decided to run with the idea since it ran well with the soulmate AU concept.

Well, thanks for reading!

#Russell Adler #Russell Adler/Bell #Russell Adler x Bell #Female Bell #reader-insert #fanfic #cod cold war spoilers #cod cold war fanfiction #Female Bell!Reader #fanfiction #shot through the heart (and you're to blame)#soulmate au #soulmate songs/music au #fic: shot through the heart (and you're to blame)

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azroazizah · 4 years

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Want you to know you are a gift that I am grateful to have found to keep a touchstone couple like SoMa alive for people like me that miss them. I was wondering, what’s your top recommended fanfic for SoMa, your own work included?

sjgsvjkdsjkd stop you’ll kill me with diabetes, pls, I beg you

this list is sacrilegiously short, bc I only list what’s currently been on my mind lmao, a complete list may follow at a later date. so here we go, in no specific order:

Red Eyes Bleed Green by Bitter November. (M). A mangaverse fic where Soul is the absolute dumbest boy with negative self-esteem. Good thing Maka tries her hardest to drill into his thick skull that he's the only one she wants. Featuring shipper Wes. God, I love that man.

Stereo Hearts by Bitter November. (M). Soul has everything going for him to woo Maka. Mood music, cheesy serenade, romantic gift, witch's death curse-say what! Bitty writes so much interesting and hilarious SoMa. Check other fics as well and you’re not gonna be disappointed.

Bare Feet & Cowboy Boots by khaleesimaka. (M). In which Maka Albarn went to be one of the candidates to win the heart of Cowboy Bachelor Soul Evans. All Liz’s fault. She's certainly not going to catch the case of feelings, of course. wdym

Dragon by Odat. (M). Dragon!Soul. Who purrs and schedules his naps. Absolute delight.

How to Train Your Soul by Poisoned Scarlet. (M). Also Dragon!Soul, with Maka as his rider. A++

Blind Faith by Poisoned Scarlet. (T). Housewife Soul in a biker wardrobe caring for this tiny little blind girl? Hell yeah.

the delta sun burns bright and violet by Poisoned Scarlet. (M). Mermaid!Maka. Someone really should teach her how to use curses. Or to wear clothes. Poor Soul.

Cloudburst by Poisoned Scarlet. (T). Grumpy Cat Soul. Maka really had no idea that her cat was a human. A very attractive human.

Someday by Poisoned Scarlet. (M). Warlock Soul and his ‘angel’ lover. You heard me mention Scarlet a whole lot. Yes. All she’s written was pure gold and unicorn tears. She has like a hundred of SoMa fics. Read all of them. Five stars.

Steady Hands, Steady Hearts by TooOceanBlue. (T). Canonverse fic. Bruh, I live and breathe in Evans Family Headcanons and how Maka reacts to them and their relationship with Soul, and this one is the kind of Evans family I love the most.

We Just Don't Give it a Name by Aedien. (K). This. Absolutely what I thought how mangaverse SoMa relationship is. A+++

Amplify by Marsh of Sleep. (M). In which Soul and Maka realizes there’s a psychic link between their souls.

Lodestar by Marsh of Sleep. (M). Cowboy AU. Hooooo boy, this is one of the first SE fics I've ever read and it constantly returns to my mind every other day.

If Only Tonight We Could Sleep by Marsh of Sleep. (M). Zombie Apocalypse AU. sometimes poetic and sometimes heartbreaking. Often both. “Soul?”.......... “Speaking.” God I love those two lines far too much

Quantum Entanglement by Marsh of Sleep. (M). In which Soul find his main tank is actually a girl. A very cute girl who cosplays. I. Absolutely. Can’t. Keep. A. Straight. Face. I really love how Marsh write character interactions and dynamics. She makes a very adorable Soul (he gives his family cute nicknames like Matriach or Firstborn, what a dork). Actually just go read all of her fics. They’re gold. No. Platinum.

Count to Eight by infantblue. (M). In which Maka was dragged into another timeline where she'd died on the Moon and find her beloved partner broken beyond recognition. An evil fic. A very evil fic. Pls don't read if you still want your heart whole. (jk, read it and cry with me as we curse Chloe together)

One Damn Thing After Another by metisket. Mangaverse, from Soul’s point of view. If you want to peek inside of the snarkiest, the darkest, the most anxious, the dumbest pining idiot in existence, read this.

The Exception Clause by Lisp. (T). In which Maka Albarn refuses to lose a bet, and Soul Evans makes a surprisingly good fake-boyfriend. I like their dynamics a lot.

Two of Us by Professor Maka. (T). A mangaverse fic featuring the Evans family. Perfect set of Fake Dating (fake marriage?) and Mutual Pining.

Touch Cats Shut Up by makapedia. (T). Fruits Basket AU. With Soul as the cat. Angst, check. Fluff, check. Stubborn Maka, check. Completely adorable Soul, check. Kid as Edward Cullen, check. lmao

Poor Unfortunate Soul by makapedia. (M). In which Soul is a terrible incubus. No, not just terrible. Absolutely dreadful. At least until he meets a certain pigtailed girl. Kat makes very fluffy and adorable Souls, I swear. Read her other fics too!!

ALSO I FOUND ANOTHER LIST OF AUTHORS AND I ABSOLUTELY AGREE WITH THIS PLS CHECK EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM. 100000/10 WOULD RECOMMEND!!!

I, uh, I haven’t written that much fanfic, really, well, I have, but that’s just my 276927494 opened-but-ignored wip documents speaking. My betas and the discord people I annoy on daily basis might murder me bc I have a shamefully big unfinished WIP list planned lmao, no guys I promise I’m working on it,but uhh, if you wanna read what I’ve published so far then... uh....

A Winter Solstice. (M). Easily my favorite work so far. Fullmetal Alchemist AU. In which Maka Albarn, a second generation state alchemist, stumbled across Soul, a lonely Ishvalan boy who could transmute himself into a scythe, among the ruins of Death City.

Those Unspoken Things. (T). SoMa Week 2019 collection

Love is in the Air! (kill it, please!). (T). Valentine fluffshots.

So yeah, I plan to write more, and finish what I started wwwwww, bc what’s life without constantly making two dorks kissing each other?

Anyway, thank you for asking!! I’m a bab in this fandom so I haven’t consumed that much food yet, I’m so sorry this is too blasphemously few. I certainly forgot lots but everyone is welcomed to add more! (actually, pls add more, I need to have more ways to destroy my sleep schedule)

#zi answers #soul eater #fic recs #soul x maka #pls add more I beg you #the-undiscovered-muse

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aliynavenus · 4 years

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‘A Little Adjustment’ a DamiRae Fanfic

Prologue || Chapter 1 ||

Chapter 2:

Weird. Something about Damian and Jon was off or more than that if she could say. She knew she was gone longer than expected, thanks to Robin who by the way made her feel a bundle of surreal heat writhe her body that wouldn’t go away. Everything was still clear in her head, his arms trapping her in between his arms, their noses barely touching, one touch to the skin would’ve led to something so unpredictable--azar what was she thinking its the stupid sin making him act that way, right?

Though that wasn’t the only thing that was on her mind. When she got back, the air felt heavy and awkward, she couldn’t quite explain it but something felt off. Damian was quiet the entire night, she caught him sneaking glances at her, barely touching the food when they were gathered in the living room watching Jon’s poor choice of a movie. Gods, he probably lied saying he did like thai food.

Anyway, that was the least of her worries, after Jon and Damian called it quits to go to sleep quite early which was rare since Jon never slept early even when school was the next day. But she rather let it go knowing she did have a full non-sleeping schedule waiting for her. That was her cue to trap herself in her room to try and gather as much information as she possibly could on how to break the deadly sin seal.

Later that day...Monday 2:34 a.m

After scrummaging word after word all night on every book she had kept from Azarath, which were far too many that some even took up the storage closet down the hall. Every bit of knowledge that was kept about the Deadly Sins had to be somewhere in this house….

And nothing.

Absolutely nothing. Just basics. No information. No guidelines. No damn way on how to unbreak the seal. Everything was completely useless.

Gods. Every ounce of hope she somewhat had completely gone. What she was supposed to do now, not like picking up and finding information about the deadly sins in a library is common here.

You poor fool, only you could cause such a mess. A wreck which was what you were created for.

There goes her father again. He may be non threatening but gods when she felt at her weakest he was always trying to escape, trying to find tiny gaps to manipulate himself out.

When are you finally going to understand, daughter? You were made to cause havoc, you are already doing so well. Just be what you were destined for.

“Stop!”

Raven eruptly pitched forward, fingers digging into her carpet. Her breath was caught in the back of her throat. Her body felt as if it was on fire, feeling flames, the flames that burned Azarath. She was remembering it all, Azarath on fire, the wildfire running up her body. Her father was trying to manipulate himself out, by trying to remember what she was. A bead of sweat glided down the side of her forehead trying unhear his truthful words. “Azarath Meitron Zintos,” Taking breath by breath, regaining control of her breathing, soon feeling the burst of heat decrease and pile down into mere nothing. And just like that his presence vanished. She regained control. She was still here. But every word he said, kept replaying like a record that won’t stop.

Is he right? Was she really kidding herself, pretending to try to live a normal life as if she wasn't destined to be an evil spawn to her father. What if he was right?

Even if he was, she had to fix the mess she started first with Robin. Drawing herself out of her room to go collect the books in the storage room. The halls were dark and quiet, the Kents home were plastered with dozens of picture frames of them, happy smiles, awkward ones too at first, even some where she would look grossed out whenever Jon would put straws up his nose. It may have been 3 months since she moved in but that didn’t necessarily mean it was fully her home, nor did it make it forget her past.

Creak

Raven jumped seeing the window at the end of the hall be creaked open. Fingers upturned on the bottom pulling it up ever so slightly. Their body being covered by the darkness of the shadows A burglar? Right now? Dark magic eloped out her hands ready to scare whoever it was, it’ll be easy. Though there was no need once she saw the gemful eyes of emerald gleam coming through the window.

“Damian..? Damian’s head shot up, she could hear a curse that was so quite under his breath as his feet hit the rugged floor.

Raven blinked, wasn’t he sleeping over anyway? so why was he here with a duffle bag? “Why are you coming through the window?”

Damian clenched the strap of the bag, what is he hiding a dead animal in there? His movements shifted but she could tell he looked rather stiff, “I went to go for a run in the park.”

“At night?...with a duffle bag?”

Damian clears his throat, “Yea, I think it’s better to work out at night, had to bring an extra change of clothes.”

“Oh” No wonder he was in such great shape, he may be fully clothed but azar was it clear to her that he was muscularly built, his biceps practically tightly compact in his short sleeve olive shirt. He could rip it in one swift motion if he wanted it.

Damian’s eyes of emerald slowly fell down her body as if he was admiring her, lips slightly tilting upwards making her whole body tense “I didn’t think you’d be such a big fan of superman.”

A fan? All at once she felt her heart sink to her stomach, feeling a embarrassment rip through her spine, now realizing what he meant and what she was wearing. An oversize dark blue shirt with the superman logo on it that Kara gave her. Now she really regrets wearing it tonight, especially might she add with no shorts under. Crap, if she stretched the slightest bit up her panties will show. Gods she felt like a deer in headlights right before him.

“Well….it belongs to my cousin Kara, she gave it to me”

Damian scoffed, turning his gaze from hers and traced his lower lip with his tongue ever so slightly, as if he found something amusing, but said nothing and changed the subject, “So my turn, why are you up, Raven.”

“Uh I couldn’t sleep. I wanted to get a book from the storage room.” well not like she could tell him the whole truth. “Well, it’s your first day back to school tomorrow, you should probably go to sleep,”

Damian stood quiet tilting his head watching her back face towards him. Raven opened the door pulling on the string attracted to the light bulb, revealing dim light streaks on the room. Revealing a clutter of mess in it, it was narrow but still spacious with piles of small bins surrounding her feet. Her eyes searching on top of the shelves to look for her books all in Azarath language,

Opening portals to dimensions...Reversing time...aha Origins on the Deadly Sins, that has to lead her somewhere. It was a thick, grey eerie looking book that very much did not look earthly. Reaching onto the shelves, her fingers barely touching the spine of it.

“Need some help?”

Raven swallowed seeing Damian crossing his arms, and leaning against the door frame. Didn’t he go to bed already? Gods how long has he been watching her. His eyes were bold as if they were burning into hers, but his eyes..they were dark.

Shifting herself to the balls of her feet, she did need his height, “Y-yea.” her words were caught in her throat, “Can you get it for me?”

“Mm.” Damian hummed dropping the duffle bag in the corner. He walked forward, invading her space. She never noticed how small she felt next to him. The room was so compacted that she could barely move back to give him room, though this only made her notice him. Notice every feature, every sharp line on his face, gods the rumors were right. He truly was sculpted by the gods. Raven could smell the scent of cedarwood mixed with cinnamon roll off his body. Watching him reach for the book that was almost too easy for him to grab. Something about him felt warm, it made her feel comfortable, almost familiar.

Damian looked down at it, lifting an eyebrow at how uncommonly it looked, “Interesting looking book.”

Of course, he would say that.

“Yea, just doing some research.”

“Care to let me know on what?”

Why was he questioning her research, if that’s what she could call it. Usually people don’t want anything to do with dark magic or people from different dimensions. Humans were scared of the unknown, so why hasn’t he just left already? “Nothing that would interest you.”

“Not a lot interests me. But this does, so why not tell me.” His voice was low like a whisper towered over her. He really was tall, azar , she never felt so small in her life.

“You aren’t scared?” Looking up to meet his eyes.Wow, his eyes really were no joke. They were exquisite. They were gems of emerald that were bold, that felt so magnetic to look at.

Damian tilted his head slightly taken aback by her question. Biting his bottom lip, almost like he was resisting something. “It takes a lot to terrorize me and I know you won’t ever frighten me. You aren’t something to be scared of, Raven.”

Raven stared into him as what felt infinite, what could she possibly say. It felt like a spiral of thoughts comprehending that Damian, Damian Wayne was saying this all to her. It was comforting. Her heart felt twisted as if it could burst any second. Knowing that a person that wasn’t her new family could say that to her. Afterall she was made to destroy humanity. But his words made her feel gentle, whole.

The Damian that was known to be arrogant and obnoxious wasn't it front of her. Instead he was a mystery plastered before her, that for some reason she wanted to turn the page to know who he actually was. A foolish rush ran up her veins where the seal once was, watching the dim light illuminate every perfect feature he has. Their bodies were so close together, that the slight movement and she would feel his chest on hers. And for some reason she wanted that…she wanted to touch him..wanting to know if there's more to him...what was she thinking?

Damian’s fingers clenched harder on the book, imprinting his fingerprints on the cover. Something wanted to come out but he wouldn’t let it. He looked guarded. Damian’s lip twitched, as if something was aching him inside, something tempting. His tongue peeking to glide under his lower lip, not looking a second away from her. His lips, they were so full and deviously inviting. That it made her feel a sensation in between her thighs that was achingly dangerous, how is she feeling like this? Especially now..and towards him..

“Rav--.”

Without thinking, Raven pressed herself forward, laying her lips onto his desperately. Damian groaned into her mouth by her sudden action not quite sure how to react. She wasn’t sure what came over her, all she knew was that the desire to touch him was eating her whole, into a pit of heat that ended up consuming her. But should she really be doing this?

Everything about their status was wrong, but the gods why did it feel so unrighteously right. Feeling their heated breath combine into each other, having the taste of his lips mingle with hers. This was Damian Wayne, a notorious billionaire’s son that was popular anywhere he went. He was Jon’s best friend.

Raven pulled away “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t--”

Hearing the echo of the sound of the book drop from Damian’s hands. He cut her off, wrapping an arm around her neck gripping her shoulder while the other cradled her cheek pulling her lips back to his dangerously hard.

“Shut up.”

Damian grunted roughly in between their kiss that was messy yet thrilling, it only made the kiss writhe her body with his heat. His hold on her was so aggressive, and so protecting, he didn’t want her to pull away for a second. The sensation of his touches were everywhere, tangled in her hair, exploring every curve and dip in her body, admiring what he’s been craving.

Raven’s body may have been still covered by her shirt but she found his touches longing, wanting to feel the roughness of his prints on her skin. Hearing the wetness of their kiss, only made her feel a marvel of tension forming between her thighs.

She was wet. Is this what felt like? The pleasure that was so excruciating that left her body aching to be touched there. She wanted to know what his touch felt against her skin, so bad.

Raven gasped against his mouth causing Damian to draw her lower lip into his mouth, sucking pleasurably on it.

“Your lips taste so good.”

Oh gods hisvoice could draw her to the edge. She has never been kissed like this, it was amazing yet unpatterned, and she wanted more. Gripping his shirt tightly she was losing balance of herself, feeling her knees grow weak. Thankfully Damian noticed and gripped her waist, their kisses just as relentless and filled with want, as he lifted her up to place her on top of a bin that was against the wall. His mouth tasting her kiss after kiss, sliding his tongue against her wet lips, wanting to savor more. Their tongues gliding within each other, feeling every stroke, and the sizzling heat that rushed into their veins. Raking her nails through Damian’s hair feeling his teeth lightly bite down her tongue, causing her to moan sending vibrations that only made him grunt hearing how much she was enjoying herself. It only made him want her more.

Raven spread her legs feeling the bitter air brush against her shameful dampen pussy, gods she forgot she wasn’t wearing shorts. It only made their position much more devious.

Damian’s hand fell downwards feeling the mounds of her breast still covered by her shirt. Her mouth gasping for air against his lips, his fingertips stop, feeling the fabric of her bralette under her shirt, tracing over it. Her chest still may be covered but it wasn’t hard to see that her nipples were erect and begging to be noticed.

Pulling away from her lips, pressing his forehead against hers. Their exhales hot against each other looking lost in each other's iris. Damian's eyes were dark yet soft that were filled with hunger . Raven was almost scared that he would go away, but that was all gone when she felt his thumb rub small lazy circles around her nipple. Until he finally touched it, circling it, rolling it around his thumb watching her moan in pleasure, his eyes never leaving hers. She felt embarrassed as he watched her small pants, she couldn’t help but glance away from his stare.

“Raven, look at me.”

It was a command. His words were low and hoarse that rumbled against her ears. Gods it only made her wetter. Thankfully there was such a small space between her navel and his lower stomach, that if he brought her closer to him, he would know what he’s doing to her.

Lifting her thick lashes at him, feeling a flush of red spread across her cheeks. She looked at him, really looked at him. Raven wanted him to know she was feeling so good. Damian groaned, pinching her nipple softly, as if he was nervous on how’d she’d react. Yet it only made her mouth part, biting down on her lip.

“A-ah, do it again, please.” Her body has never felt that before, every sensitive nerve was electricity down her body when she felt his fingertips do the same motion, teasing her, it only caused the tension to grow in between her thighs. Pinching, rubbing, and rolling it along his fingers but adding more pressure onto it, and gods did that do her wonders. “I like that..a lot”

“You truly are sensitive.” Harshly pinching her nipple once more, her moan was exhaled filling the heated air bouncing off the wall. It only made Damian growl attacking her lips wanting to feel the vibrations against their mouths again. Everything in him was yearning to touch her more, gripping her thighs pulling her closer to his lower stomach.

Oh gods.

His stomach was tight and hard that she could feel the dents of his abs press against her wet. How did he look under that shirt, these damn clothes that was hiding every sculpted build. He may be fully clothed but she knew Damian could feel how wet she was. Gods she could practically stain his shirt. She was right, Damian could feel how wet she was, tightening his grip on her waist. Biting back every moan she kept. Her back arching as her lower body was pushed against him while his lips were pushing her back feeling his dominant tongue attack hers feeling his other hand tangled in her hair.

The touch of his lower stomach against her soaked pussy made her want to get lower. She wanted to feel him, all of him. Rolling her hips against his stomach, aching for more.

“ Fuck” Damian’s breath was caught in between his teeth. Feeling her panties soaked against his chest. She wanted him to go under her shirt. To touch her. To feel his fingers against her bare skin. She wanted him to touch her everywhere , even if it was wrong.

Continuing the same motion with her hips, Damian growled against her skin, pressing his forehead against hers, grasping her hips to stop her movements. His expression was hard, filled with the want that he was trying to over conquer, it was almost unreadable what he was thinking.

“Behave”

It wasn’t a question or a statement. It was a demand that she sure knew her heart stopped seeing his eyes go dark. Gods, She was in trouble.

Maneuvering his eyes to her lap, seeing that Raven’s shirt hitched up enough to see her red panties. She could see his cock throb under his joggers, a bulge that looked dreadfully taunting that wanted to be free. Holy Azar, he looked huge. She may have been a virgin but it clearly looked like it could break her if it went anywhere inside her...not like it ever would.

Damian was biting his lip harshly watching her lap, that looked picture perfect. Her sensitive soaked panties pressed against his stomach, that was messily trying to be covered by her shirt. It was destroying him inside, not to do more to her. His eyes dropped a shade of green that was dangerously threatening. The room was filled with the blaring heat of their bodies, echoing pants that seemed to bounce off the walls in the small closet. Their hands still on each other's bodies not wanting to lose contact with what they have right now. Both watching each other's lower abdomen as if waiting for further instruction on what to do. But the truth was neither knew what to do.

Thump

Damian and Raven jumped at the sudden noise behind them seeing a Christmas storage bag had fallen to the floor. An ornament rolling along the floor only to stop at the book that was inches away from them.

Oh right. She forgot that’s why they were both here. A simple helpful hand only turned into something ravishingly devious.

That small noise seemed to bring them back into reality hearing Damian clear his throat releasing his every grip he had on her. “Here” grabbing the book from the ground, placing it in front of her.

She felt awkward at how nonchalant he was being. What was she expecting anyway? Hopping off of the bin fixing her shirt to fall down to her mid thighs. “Thanks.” She couldn’t look him in the eyes, how could see after she was just having the time of her life that soon turned into thin air.

“I should get to sleep. School’s starts in the morning.” Raven wanted to curse at herself hearing how soft her voice sounded. “Goodnight.” without even wanting to hear his reply she swooshed pass him, already wanting to avoid the embarrassment that filled the room.

Shutting the door behind her in her room, she plopped herself on the bed.

Gods how could she have been so stupid doing that? She’s never wanted to do that before? Sure she may have thought about what it was like kissing someone but actually taking the action to do it by herself..it never crossed her mind until then. Why? Raven then recalls feeling the heat of the rush up her forearm in the beginning. It came from the seal.

Looking at the book in her hands, she opens it. Reading word after word until…

Oh no. This can’t be real.

She really was in trouble.

howdy if u made it to here, so so sorry it took awhile to update, i was having writers block again, honestly i wanted to be a smut fanfic through and through but idk if people enjoy that, even tho i do. But it might get like that more and more but I’m still trying to put the certain plot i want. ALSO damian was on his way back from patrol when raven caught him but lol she don’t know. Anyway im rambling hopefully you liked this chapter and still enjoy my work.

#damirae #a little adjustment fanfic #lmaooo a little razzle dazzle of touching #hehehehe #lol well get there #i still have to write the next chapter for my other fanfic ahhhhh #its finally hereeeee #damian wayne #rachel roth #raven #dc #fanfiction #writing #demonbirds #damian and raven #dc fanfic

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aliceslantern · 3 years

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Heartlines, a Kingdom Harts fanfic, chapter 28--Epilogue

Twelve years ago, Xemnas betrayed the royal court of Radiant Garden to his father, Xehanort. Prince Ienzo flees to another city and begins university in the aftermath, hoping the anonymity will protect him from eager eyes with ill intent. The darkness spilling across the country, as well as an individual from his past, cut short Ienzo's new beginning and bring new conflicts to light. Strained between the desires of his magic and his heart, Ienzo's choice will change him forever.

Modern Fantasy AU, Soulmates, Zemyx. Updates Fridays until it's done.

Chapter summary: Time passes. The kingdom recovers. A prophecy comes full circle.

Read it on FF.net/on AO3

---

Life was a work in progress. There were periods of unrest in the kingdom which were not always easy to smooth over with words, but Ansem did not want to use force. “Remember, Ienzo, a riot is the language of the unheard.”

Flowers began to bloom in Radiant Garden again. There was still signs of destruction everywhere--rubble, smashed out windows, destroyed buildings. But piece by piece, it was getting put together. The resistance based itself in the capital city and started what it called a “restoration committee,” not just to restore the city, but the whole kingdom.

Demyx spent a lot of time at the beach with Amalia, now that they both had their forms. Ienzo wondered if it would be salt in wounds to go to Destiny Islands at some point. He would ask when he felt ready.

Something else was growing too.

When he felt the nausea, the fatigue and dizziness, and the achiness, Ienzo did not delude himself into denial as he did the last time. He looked at himself in the bathroom mirror, good and hard. He held his hand in front of his stomach and reached out, tentatively. Something was there, a potential for a new life. But he did not feel the overwhelmed sense of panic he had when he was first pregnant with Amalia. He was still young, ridiculously so, but would this be so terrible?

He sought Even, who was busy puttering around the labs. There was light in his eyes again, joy, at having something productive to do. In fact, he did not seem bothered by Ienzo’s interruption. “No bureaucratic nonsense today?”

“My father insisted I take the morning off.”

“Your daughter?”

“Out swimming. I swear, sometimes I have difficulty getting the two of them to come home.”

“...It is good, to see Demyx happy again. I was… concerned.”

“Were you? You could barely stand each other in the beginning.”

Even rolled his eyes and pulled off his goggles. “Adversity draws people together,” he said. “I wonder often… if I have hardened my heart too much. I am trying… to let people back in.”

“And how is that going?”

He considered. “It is going,” he said. “But better than being stalled. Good to be… active. And to see you some semblance of safe at last.”

Ienzo came a bit closer. He was working on one of the replicas, a faceless white mannequin half covered with a sheet. “Does it feel good to see your work come to fruition?”

“It is bittersweet--putting it mildly.” He sighed. “If not for… that creature’s breakthroughs, this would not be possible.”

“It is still your creation.” Ienzo paused. “Even, have you met Xion?”

He fussed with tubes of mystery fluid. “Who?”

“Xion, Xemnas’s… ward. I shall have to introduce you.”

His eyes snapped up. “Why?”

“Because she is one of the replicas.”

“Of whom?”

“Of nobody. Herself.”

Even grasped his shoulders. “And you only tell me this now, boy?”

“Please be gentle with me, Even.”

He seemed to be reeling. “...Why?”

“I find myself to be in an indelicate condition. As it were.”

He turned red. “ Again ? Child, you know what causes that, right?”

Ienzo chuckled. “Would it be so terrible, to get the childrearing over with while my father is still able to help me rule?”

Even pressed a hand to his forehead and sputtered wordlessly. After a moment, he composed himself and held a hand over Ienzo’s stomach. “...Quite. I do not know whether to laugh… or cry…”

“Go seek Xion. She’s a guard on the upper floors. I know that’s where your heart is.”

He was already taking his coat off, grabbing a tablet computer. “Yes… right… we can discuss this later…” And he was out the door.

Ienzo returned to their rooms. To his surprise, Demyx and Amalia were back. “Done for the day already?”

Demyx gestured out the window. “It’s gonna storm. Plus I figured I owe you some lunch.” He leaned forward to kiss him, and Ienzo could taste the salt.

“Ra!” Amalia said.

“Right, rain.” Ienzo crouched down and smoothed the wet hair from her face.

“I’m gonna get cleaned up. What do you feel like? There’s this new place that’s opened back up not far out of the gates--”

Ienzo followed him into the bathroom. Demyx laughed a little.

“Look, I’d be so down, but like, she’s right in the other room--”

“I’m pregnant.” He didn’t know why the words had to leave him now, without ceremony.

Demyx just blinked. “Really?”

“Yes. Really.”

“Oh…” A small smile. “Oh… Do you want to--”

“I… want them.” He swallowed. “Get it over with while we’re young, right? While my father is still helping me? I can’t imagine going through this while being fully responsible for everything else.”

Demyx hugged him. “Round two?”

“...It seems so. I mean, to be fair, we were not the least bit careful, and it has been happening quite a lot lately--”

He kissed his forehead. “They’re going to be great.”

---

As it stormed later that night… Ienzo lay awake. He’d been even more of an insomniac during pregnancy, and he hadn’t much missed that. But he could not sleep. Demyx, who could basically sleep at will, had one arm draped over his stomach.

A particularly loud peal of thunder made Demyx stir, and from the other room Ienzo heard Amalia shriek and start to cry. Demyx’s eyes fluttered open. “It’s okay,” Ienzo told him. “I’ve got this. Go back to sleep.”

The drawing room had been turned into a nursery more fully now, the soft light of the mobile reflecting the rain in the room. Amalia was still crying. Ienzo leaned over the crib and hefted her into his arms. He settled in the old rocking chair. “It’s just a storm, sweetheart,” he said.

“Bad,” she said. “Bad, bad.”

“I know. It scared you.” He rocked gently. “I’m here. I’ll keep you safe. How about a story?”

Ienzo told her a story he’d learned from Demyx, about a rainbow fish that gradually gave up its scales to help others. He let his power cast a quiet illusion along the walls, of a deep blue sea, of that same fish swimming seemingly in midair. Somewhere in this, she fell back asleep, and rather than put her back in her crib, Ienzo remained there, thinking.

She hadn’t mentioned a sibling in the Forecast. Her words had been “we live with dad and grandpa in the castle”. If he gave birth on schedule, that child would be her age by the time of the Forecast.

But at the same time, toddlers were selfish. It could’ve just slipped her mind. Perhaps she was closer to Even or Ansem than her own sibling. Ienzo took a deep breath. Part of pregnancy was being illogically anxious.

It would be fine.

---

Perhaps it was for this reason, but Ienzo kept news of this child from Ansem. A few weeks passed, tremulously. He kept at work, meeting officials, sitting in committee meetings, deciding, deciding. Helping organize a parliamentary election.

After one such meeting, he was gathering his papers to return to his study when he felt a cramp, hard. He gasped aloud. “Are you alright, your highness?” Lydia asked. She was back to her post as librarian, and she’d brought him some books.

He blinked. “I’m… fine,” he said woodenly. Cramping during the first few months was normal, wasn’t it? Might be worth getting himself examined anyway. “It is nothing.”

“...Alright. Well, pardon me for overstepping, but perhaps you might rest. It’s been a long day.”

He swallowed, trying to choke down the dread. “I shall. Thank you.”

He made his way back not towards his rooms, but towards Even. The pain stuck him hard under the heart, and he had to duck into a bathroom before he lost composure. He wasn’t sure what whisper of an instinct told him so, but he pulled down his pants and checked his underwear.

Blood. A not-insignificant amount. He stuffed one of the small folded hand towels between his legs--mentally apologizing to the launderers--and hazily kept going. He almost stumbled getting the lab door open. “Even,” he said, and perhaps it was his tone, but the man immediately looked up.

“Ienzo, what--”

“Something isn’t right. With the baby.”

He grabbed him immediately and herded him over to one of the replicas’ exam tables. “And yet you drag yourself all the way down here instead of going to the infirmary.”

“I wasn’t--I didn’t want--”

He touched his face. “I know, love. Wait--are you--”

The blood must’ve seeped through the hand towel. “Fuck,” Ienzo murmured. He felt the coldness of Even’s magic assessing him.

He turned pale. “Ienzo, I’m sorry. There’s nothing I can do.”

“But is it--”

“There’s no heartbeat, and you’ve lost quite a bit of blood. There’s no… life.”

Another cramp overtook him. “They weren’t in the Forecast--I tried to convince myself it was not so--”

“I know. I know, love. We should get you to the infirmary--”

“Please, no.” He felt more wetness between his legs.

“You’re losing too much blood to justify receiving care from only me.”

How awkward, and humiliating. Even carried him like a child. Hazily, he was changed, cleaned, given something to absorb the blood, fluids, painkillers. He let himself ride this quasi-consciousness, until a hand took his. “Zo?”

“Demyx? I--I’m sorry…” He swallowed, feeling a lump in his throat. “I lost it…” His hair obscured things from view.

“The important thing is you’re okay.”

“She didn’t mention them, I should’ve known--”

Demyx drew him close and held him for a long time.

---

It took him a while to recover from the miscarriage. Not so much physically--he was back to “normal” within several days--but emotionally he felt scrambled, exhausted. He did not know it was possible to love something so small so much.

Ansem insisted he take time off. Demyx waited on him hand and foot, but he was shaken too. Ienzo slept too much, could barely look at Amalia. He was taking a bath, his mind positively going nowhere, eyes unfocused on the ceiling tiles, when he heard small footsteps. “Da-dee?”

Wearily, he looked over. “What is it, love?”

She was holding her favorite stuffed animal, a unicorn she’d named Pinky. She offered it to him.

“Thank you, but I don’t want Pinky to get wet.” He set the toy on the chair by the tub.

She leaned over the lip of the tub. “Hurt?” she said.

“I’m just tired, love.”

“Hurt,” she asserted.

Ienzo sighed. “Yes, I’m sad. You know it’s okay to be sad sometimes, right?”

She nodded. “Help?”

He kissed her. “You already are.”

---

Perhaps because it was through this particular lens of sadness, but suddenly it seemed strange that he, governed so by emotions, be the one responsible for the welfare of this country. He, whose sole “mandate to rule” was his power. Why was it that, despite humanity’s long and colorful history in this country, there had never been strides made towards democracy, or anything other than absolute power?

There had been abdications, in the past. Ienzo found himself reading about them voraciously. There had been some good reasons for such actions--fundamental disagreements about faith and the way the country should be governed, a lack of acceptance of sexuality or gender, the heir apparent believing they were not competent enough--and some not so. Considering the convoluted transfer of power, from firstborn to firstborn only , it was amazing the monarchy had not collapsed under its weight or lost its power somewhere in the past. Should the firstborn, say, die in a tragic accident, or from an aneurysm prior to having an heir, that power was simply lost for a generation. And should that first child be sufficiently… along , enough in utero, and something were to happen to them, that counted.

Ienzo needed to talk to Ansem. “Father?”

He took off his glasses. “What is it?”

“Can I talk to you?”

He offered a smile. “Of course. How are you feeling, dear heart?”

He sighed and sat down. “This has all been very… overwhelming.”

“I’m sure. Loss of a child… even one that is not yet living… is very heavy stuff indeed.”

“I’ve been thinking a lot about… mortality. Human weakness. Limitations of the body.” He found himself looking at his knees. “The fragility of my… power. How does it make me qualified to rule? The child I lost… could very well have been Amalia, some months along the line. Suddenly that power is gone.” He touched his abdomen. “Father, this whole monarchy… is starting to feel very…”

“Pointless?” He rubbed his brows. “I agree entirely. But the last thing people need right now is a radical change in government. We’re only just settling. Imagine what might happen if we suddenly propose some other form of rule?”

“...I know.”

“Once this is all over… I’m wondering if we should…”

“...Abdicate?” He cocked his head slightly.

Ienzo took a breath. “Am I a traitor for even thinking it?”

“Oh, Ienzo. No. Not at all. Class division is part of how we got into this mess in the first place. That you seek to abolish it shows your love for your people. Perhaps it might be worth it to consider the schema as to how this will be put in place.”

Ienzo let out a breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding. “Truthfully?”

“Truly.”

“...Thank you.”

---

Time passed.

Amalia was growing so quickly . She started to speak more clearly, in longer sentences. She started to show more magic. Once, Ienzo walked into her room and saw books hanging in the air all around them. “Look,” she said. “They’s flying.”

Demyx expressed his own desire to do work of some kind. “People need art,” he told Ienzo. “They’re going to need a way to deal with all that pain.” Together, they jumpstarted a national art program. To finally be active, to finally be helping people in a meaningful way… Ienzo felt… fulfilled.

This was all going to take work, probably constantly. But that there might be a day where they could have a simple, happy life with their family gave him pleasure.

Perhaps he shouldn’t have been surprised, but one spring day Amalia asked if they could go on a picnic. The day was sunny, the flowers were in bloom. He was sitting on a blanket on a patch of grass in the plaza. He worked the teardrop-shaped pendant absently with one hand. He knew that at some point they'd have to formally get married as long as he was in the public eye. But for now... this was enough.

“Daddy, look!” She opened her hands, revealing a small magic flower. “I made it!”

“Oh, sweetie, it’s beautiful.” The deja vu struck him with insistence.

She smiled widely, and reached to be picked up, so he did. “Can we go to the garden?”

“Of course.” Demyx was supposed to meet them there after his lesson in the city. He took the picnic blanket and set off.

“Do you think this is real?”

“What do you mean, love?”

“This. Right now.”

“What makes you say that?”

“I dunno… a ‘motion I had.”

“A feeling?” Ienzo offered. Then, “I had a dream when I was pregnant with you.”

“When I was in your tummy?”

“That’s right. And you sent me a memory, of this moment, right now.”

“What I say?”

“You told me about our friends. The ones who met you when you were a baby.”

She laughed. “Isa and mister Xemnas.”

“Yes. You told me everything I needed to know. It’s because of you this is all like this, you know?”

“I know,” she said, unimpressed. “Where’s daddy?”

“He’s on his way.”

They passed through the castle gates to the gardens, which were lush and full again. Aerith was tending to the flowers; she waved. “Hi flower lady,” Amalia called loudly.

“Hey yourself,” she said back.

Ienzo set down the blanket on a patch of clean glass.

“There’s my favorite girl.” Demyx set down the sitar. He scooped her up and gave her a kiss. “Did she give you much trouble?”

“Not today. Not yet. Did you get the i-c-e c-r-e-a-m?”

“Ice cream!” Amalia shouted.

“Zo, she’s too smart for that.” Demyx laughed. “Sold out, I’m afraid.”

Ienzo sighed. He’d been looking forward to it all day.

“But I did get these from someone at the lesson.” He handed Ienzo a bag with a pastry box inside. “Egg tarts. Several people told me they are to die for.” He sat down with their daughter.

Ienzo took them out and handed one to Amalia. “...Do you know,” he began. “Today’s the day.”

Demyx frowned. “What day?”

“It all came full circle. The Forecast. On the way over here.”

“Oh… wow. Really?”

He smiled. “And the future is again aqueous.”

“Like that’s a bad thing? Look, if we knew every minute, we’d always be trying to plan things. We wouldn’t get to decide.” He brushed a crumb from their daughter’s mouth. “Because of her… and you… we do now. I’m okay with that.”

“I… am too.” He swallowed.

“It’ll be us against the world.” His eyes were so soft.

“I know that.” He chuckled. “It’s terrifying, to have the choice. I think I’d like to finish university first.”

“School, school,” Amalia said eagerly. “Me and daddy go to school.” She was going to go to nursery school in the fall.

“Daddy’s going to school for big kids,” Demyx said to her. “You’re going with kids your age. Little.”

“Not little.” She huffed, then brightened. “School and make lots of friends!”

“She’s like you all right,” Ienzo said.

“Dunno. She’s too smart for her own good--like you.”

“I don’t know what I want to be when I grow up,” Ienzo admitted.

“I wanna be a cat doctor. Or a rockstar. Or maybe…” Amalia stuck out her tongue in thought. “Wanna be an explorer .”

“You already are, silly.” Demyx tickled her, and she squealed.

“I do still want to help people. Maybe psychology, or…” He trailed off. “To be determined.”

“Well, you’ve got time.” Demyx picked up one of the egg tarts and all but crammed it into Ienzo’s mouth.

He scowled, but then, “These are good.”

“Right?”

---

The sun was setting. Ienzo watched it from his alcove in the library. This was his favorite spot, its light, its smell of varnished wood and old books. But he wasn’t reading.

“...It is lovely, isn’t it?”

Ienzo looked up and saw Even, for once without his lab coat, his long hair pulled back into a ponytail. “Where were you?”

“I was… with your father. I’m afraid he made me take a walk in the garden.”

Ienzo felt his lips twitch into a smile. “Well, was it a nice walk?”

He wondered if he was imagining the blush. “It is good to get fresh air,” he said evasively. He leaned against the desk next to Ienzo. “So I hear you’re to… abdicate.”

“In several years, once things settle, but… yes. And Demyx will abdicate on Amalia’s behalf. No more royalty. Whatever we have left will simply be ceremonial, if that.”

Even chuckled gently. “All the time I spent defending the monarchy, and you’re giving it up. You are making me gray, child.” But he said this pleasantly. “Yes… change is not so bad. The world needed it. We needed it. We could not… run forever.”

“Do you feel good, to no longer be running?”

“I do,” he admitted. “I felt such a coward for so many years. To get my hands dirty is a relief.”

“I have to thank you, for all you’ve done for me. I took you for granted.”

Even reached over and brushed the hair out of his face. “Well raising you certainly wasn’t easy.”

He laughed a little.

“In all seriousness, Ienzo, I didn’t do it entirely out of duty. I loved you--and I still love you--as if you were my own. Bonds don’t change, the… lines between hearts.”

“Heartlines?” He raised his eyebrow. “My father must be rubbing off on you. You were never so philosophical.”

“I am trying to open my heart.” He put a hand to his chest. “And it is painful, but I feel I am… growing. Never thought I would have to at my age.”

“And what of things with Xion?”

“She is a lovely girl. She’ll do well once she starts school. We’re trying to spend time together. In a way… she is my child.” A sigh. “Though this research… what right have I to create new life?”

“You saved many who would be the seeker of darkness’s victims.”

“...A cold comfort.” He tapped his fingertips together. “Come, then. That husband of yours is attempting to cook.”

Ienzo felt a shimmer at “husband”, but was it not true? Ceremony or no ceremony. “He’s a good cook, Even, you just have an unenlightened palette.” He stood and together they began to walk.

“...I’ll just chalk it up to cultural differences. I suppose… all of this could’ve been much worse, yes?”

“It could’ve.” He paused. “Will we… once I leave this place, Even, will we still be part of one another’s lives?”

He seemed perturbed. “Of course, Ienzo. Always.” He squeezed his hand. “Don’t fear change the way I did.”

“I won’t.” He swallowed, feeling an unexpected rush of emotion. “I promise, I won’t.”

#heartlines #ienzo #demyx #zemyx #child oc - amalia #even (kingdom hearts)

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edelgardlesbians · 4 years

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Heyyo! So I don't use tumblr much and I'm not sure if this is the right place for this, but nothing ventured nothing gained or something, right? Saw the fanfic prompts post and I immediately thought of the comics/fanart/whatever a given person wants to call it that I don't have time to make (thanks college, for taking up all my free time) of Edeleth (best girls btw) inspired by pretty much every Aviators song, but especially "Follow you Down", "Red Water Dreams" and "Streets of Gold"

bro i cannot express to you how quickly i dropped everything to start writing edeleth streets of gold. all of these songs are SO good for them and are just. destroying me emotionally! anyways. this was going to be shorter but then it ended up being long, whoops! the ao3 link is here!

full fic is under the cut:

Edelgard is fundamentally a very lonely person. Everyone who once might have mitigated such a feeling is dead, and Hubert, for all his good intentions, will never be able to see her as his friend before his emperor. It isn’t a bad thing necessarily: she is not sure she will ever be able to see him as her friend over her accomplice, but it makes for a rather lonely existence.

There had been a time back at the academy when she had thought… but no, it does not do to dwell on such things at a time like this. She has a war to think about. Edelgard takes a deep breath and centers herself, pushing thoughts of the professor out of her mind. She has a war council meeting to run. Her personal feelings do not matter, not in the face of her ambitions. All that matters is that they are achieved. She will make all this death around her be worth something. None of it can be in vain.

The war council meeting is unproductive, although she is not sure what she expected. The Black Eagle Strike Force - her generals, her friends - care too much for them to agree on anything. It would be sweet, if it wasn’t incredibly frustrating. The war effort is not going badly by any means, but morale sinks lower every day. Edelgard can rally her people and make them fight their hardest, but absolute devotion is not something you can inspire with words alone. They need a gesture, a sweeping victory that moves the war in their favor and causes them all to believe in her without question.

If only it were so easy to make that happen.

“Your majesty?” Hubert says, his voice breaking through her thoughts.

Edelgard looks up, smoothing her skirts with her hands. “Yes?”

Hubert bows, the motion comforting in its familiarity, “I have that report you requested.”

“Of course,” she says, “Thank you, Hubert.”

Hubert sets the file down on her desk, then stans, hands clasped behind his back. He’s clearly holding something back: he knows her well enough that he would not wait for her to dismiss him. “There is another matter I wished to discuss with you, if you have the time.”

The question is a formality, nothing more. Hubert knows her schedule better than she does, and is fully aware that she has a fifteen minute gap before her next meeting. She gestures towards him to sit in the empty chair across from her, but he ignores her in favor of continuing to stand.

“You have seemed distracted recently,” he says. “I do not doubt your resolve or determination, but you must cast off whatever it is that is causing such turmoil.”

“Ah,” Edelgard says, laying her hands flat on her desk. “I see. You are right, I have been a bit lost in thought lately.” Hubert nods, his posture still ramrod straight. She is glad that he told her: this is not something he would have felt comfortable discussing so straightforwardly in years prior. “Thoughts of the millenium festival have plagued me, as of late. I will set such things aside.”

“She is dead,” Hubert responds. “A promise will not change that, no matter how much she intended to follow through with it.”

Edelgard looks down at her hands, “Yes. Of course. I know.”

“Be glad that all our former classmates are still alive,” Hubert advises. “They will not allow you to bear this burden alone, and neither will I.”

A shadow of a smile crosses Edelgard’s face. “Thank you Hubert.”

Hubert bows again, then turns and leaves her alone with her thoughts.

On nights like these, it is easier if Edelgard accepts that she is not going to get any more sleep than she already has. She sighs and pulls herself out of bed, dressing in silence and then setting out for a walk around the monastery grounds. The pale light of the sun is just cresting over the hills beyond the monastery. She hadn’t expected to, but she loves the monastery in a fierce, selfish kind of way. It seems unthinkable: the entire time she was there, she had known that all this temporary peace would fall apart in mere months. But regardless, it seems like part of her is always going to be that girl at the academy, relishing in the small happiness it had afforded her.

The sound of footsteps remind her of where she is, and she freezes, “Halt! Who’s there!”

“Edelgard?”

That voice… it can’t be. Edelgard turns, half expecting to see a ghost (although if this is who haunts her, over all of her siblings, that seems unfair), but instead, the professor stands there. There’s a smudge of dirt on her face, and her hair is unkempt and tangled, but it is her, absolutely her.

“Professor?” Edelgard says, hardly able to hear herself speak over the blood rushing in her ears. The goddess is a lie and there is no such thing as fate, but this is a blessing nonetheless. “It is really you? But I searched everywhere and never found a trace. Where have you been?”

Byleth’s face clouds, and her eyes dart downwards, her head bending slightly. “I was dead,” she says, her voice free of any indication that she is anything less than gravely serious.

“You can’t be joking!” Edelgard cries, hating how young she sounds in this instant. “It’s been five years since you disappeared! Do you have any idea how guilty I felt? How broken my heart was?”

Byleth steps closer, resting a hand gently on her arm, “I am sorry you were alone.”

Edelgard shakes her head, “I knew you were alive. I led everyone as best I could and fought with all my heart. It’s been a difficult path to walk alone.”

Byleth doesn’t hesitate, just brings her other hand up to squeeze Edelgard’s shoulder gently, “You are not alone.”

Edelgard closes her eyes for just a moment, then steps forward and wraps her arms around her professor, burying her face in the crook of Byleth’s neck. Her professor is right: she is not alone, and she will walk through this with Byleth at her side.

#fe3h #edeleth #fire emblem #prompt fills #my fic #still taking prompts btw! i may or may not fill them #anonymous

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angsty-aliens · 4 years

Text

Quarantine Questions

Tagged by @aewriting Thanks!

1. How has your day been? I woke up at 6:30am which is way closer to my sleep schedule than I’ve been achieving lately. (I immediately destroyed the sleep cycle.) I’m wearing real clothing, and I showered, and... that’s about it. I’m looking forward to Roswell tonight. I was hoping I’d be in the mood to write, but I’m not.

2. what is the last thing that made you smile? I’m finding a lot of solace in ridiculous animal videos. I just watched a house cat scare off a bear. Excellent content. 10/10 would recommend.

3. what's keeping you entertained these days? Boatloads of fanfic, tumblr, discord, facebook, and binge watching tv. Minimal writing. Almost nothing productive. Oh I did set up a Christmas tree and called it my quaranTREE. The lights are helping.

4. if you are in some kind of quarantine/self-isolation: is there anything you'd like to achieve in this time? I was self isolating in NYC for a week. Then I decided I couldn’t leave my mom alone for potentially months (especially since she’s not taking this seriously at all and keeps wanting to play Bunko with her elderly friends so they can all cough on each other.) So I flew down to my home state while trying to minimize potential infection (mask, gloves, social distancing, the works.) Now I’m quarantining in mom’s basement as she sticks to the upstairs. It’s been challenging, especially since the kitchen is upstairs, so I’ve been eating granola bars for a week. Oh, I totally forgot the question. Am I gonna achieve anything? No. No I’m not. I’m just going to try and make time continue to pass until I can freely roam the whole house.

5. Post a selfie. The fun thing about tumblr is it’s one of the only social media platforms on where my name isn’t attached. So no thank you. I really enjoy being anonymous here.

6. last but not least: send this to some mutuals to keep the game going 🥰 or don't. If you want to do this, go for it!

#answering memes

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nvzblgrrl · 4 years

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On the subject of old fics 1

Allegedly, A Gentleman’s Tale (published 1-6-2012) was my first fanfic ever (again, allegedly - will explain after a bit). It only exists now as a private copy at least one person has saved and a capture on the WayBackMachine (which thankfully covered the whole ten chapters of it), because I have a habit of... deleting stories that embarrass me after the fact. It’s something I’m trying to break myself of, mostly because there are a number of people who do enjoy my work even if most of what I see in it are the flaws and I would feel bad about taking away something they enjoyed.

The ‘allegedly’ part comes in in that, based on my memories of my One Piece OCs and stories (along with more concrete evidence from my tumblr), I had a few OCs with snippets of story (with one who had at least a few chapters worth of story that I have memorized in broad strokes) attached that preceded that by at least one or two years, even though the description of ‘my first fic’ was in the synopsis of the fic as it was posted. Unfortunately, it’s hard to trace that information thanks to the ‘destroy all the evidence of me embarrassing myself’ habit (I completely deactivated my deviantart account on account of ‘cringe’, that’s how bad it got) and the passage of time making it unclear which mutuals might have been around at that time or if they even remember those things.

Now, I still have the computers that I typed up those stories on (they’re hanging out in my basement), but - they haven’t worked in quite a while. I’m not sure if they’re completely bricked or not, but I haven’t had anything to do with them for a while and I know that at least one of them was replaced because it refused to turn on anymore. Someday, I might get the chance to pull out their hard-drives and get a look at the data there, but that’s not a ‘now’ solution so...

Anyway - got a bit distracted there -, thanks to the power of the WayBackMachine, I was able to reread this specific fic in its entirety.

‘A Gentleman’s Tale’ was a little thing that was pretty much Brook backstory wrapped up in the framing device of Luffy wanting a story to help him get to sleep. I was 18, had maybe a year or two of creative writing experience/interest under my belt, and a whole lot of Soul King Stan energy to spend on my favorite character despite being at the tail end of my high school career.

Surprisingly, it was not entirely awful for an alleged ‘first attempt’. The formatting was a little eh, the pacing was borked, and a lot of characters were fairly flat (and a few leaned too hard on certain stereotypes while a lot had Western order names for some reason), but other than that, it was actually palatable. Ten chapters, about 8000 words, not a whole lot to write home about or find objectionable outside of the odd grammatical error and the fact that alcohol is mentioned in almost. every. single. chapter.

Seriously, I have no idea why that was a thing for me 2012-2013ish (it ended up in Witt and Witticism a little bit - more heavily on the rewrites that never took off back in the day but a little present in the original too). I was 18-19. I’d never had alcohol. I still haven’t had alcohol. I’d never really been around drinking at that age, socially or not, beyond like, enjoying brew fries and eating chicken tenders at a bar one time because my shit father wanted to have lunch there for some reason. I just guess that I woke up at the start of 2012 and thought Drink Mixing and Booze were interesting things.

The story wasn’t much to write home about, but the characters are the real area of interest here, so let’s cover them and a few of my plans for handling them in the rewrite.

Brook - Starts out his backstory being seasick, gets to have five decent minutes when he meets Yorki, and then is immediately shoved into the wall-to-wall shitshow that’s his life as the battle convoy captain and resident responsible adult, despite 70% of the convoy being at least ten to fifteen years older than him. Somehow that makes his interest in getting black out drunk almost every single night sound reasonable. Seriously, that’s what he was doing in that story, according to what happened almost every other chapter of the fic (because pacing is for writers on their third or fourth story). That’s one reason why the timeline is being stretched out in the rewrite plans - so we don’t kill the main character through alcohol poisoning (though with the kind of stress he was under in that original cut, I can’t blame him for trying - he got saddled with three weird + constantly fighting teenagers and a dying military organization, snubbed by the king, publicly embarrassed in front of 90% of the kingdom’s nobility, and so on in the course of two to three days max). Honestly, in retrospect, I’m not sure how well this plays with the framing device of Brook relating his backstory 62 years later, because he should have lost so many brain cells to this nonsense.

Yorki - Starts his introduction by saying ‘hey, my name’s Yorki, i’m close, bi, and willing to take you on a whirlwind adventure literally two seconds after meeting you’ which Brook immediately responds to as the best thing that’s happened to him in the last (and probably next) month. Probably the only person in Brook’s life as of the fic not stressing him out or enabling his self-destructive coping habits, though that doesn’t stop him from being one of the better things Brook woke up to after one of his blackout drinking nights. Also got an incredibly shitty nickname thanks to me not knowing how that sort of thing works from his mom. In the rewrite, he’s from Ohio (because I and my Middle-Ground lingering Self-Insert are from Michigan and the opportunity for a struggle between ‘hey we’ve both being isekai’d into this weird place and have similar backgrounds/music tastes so we’re going to hang together based on that’ and ‘200 year old inter-state hatred turned into over the top sports rivalry and disliking the other state on principle’ was too good to pass up).

Luchere Gregg (Gregg being her surname) - junior member of the battle convoy. Incredibly thorny and violent personality, with very little respect for authority (outside of her father, probably) and a generally superior attitude towards literally everyone except her father, especially when she perceived someone as being weak and ‘uppity’ at the same time - Maysure was the main target of this (as was intended at the time of the writing), but considering that Luchere was taking a similar tone with Brook (which was probably intended to be for different reasons, but honestly reads very similarly almost ten years on, given that Brook’s everything is very much not in line with her ideal anything) but not Hana (who was ‘weak’ but definitely not trying to mess with Luchere’s preferred social order), I think I can get more development out of her in that dimension. Her everything was probably was cool and badass back when I was 18, but now she just strikes me as petulant and unpleasant brat.

Minalee Hana - Generic smart guy of the junior team, complete with ‘shy’ personality and ‘harmless cute’ look... which, in retrospect, makes it really confusing why she’d join a military force in the first place and just raises suspicions on the fact that she did. Honestly she could be a Government plant and I wouldn’t be surprised. Another ‘problem’ with Hana is that she was based on someone I was friends with at the time I wrote the fic, which kinda ended up helping me dislike her a lot on more recent rereads, just because of the nature of that real world ‘friendship’ and the way it blew up in the end (with a whole lot of ugly reveals along the way that went back to pretty much when I first met that person).

Maysure Semenov Tara Su-all Evony Taebory Celeste - was originally a parody of the Mary Sue archetype, as you may have guessed from the name. Flashy, overeager, desperate for acknowledgement, and not quite managing to act in ways appropriate to her age (15, directly stated in text), either being too cutesy with her speech pattern and body language or dressing in ways that would be suited for a very different profession than soldier. I ended up liking her the most out of the junior trio out on my most recent rereads, just because she’s the only member of the group that’s actually making an effort at anything (well, beyond Luchere being hostile + trying to make Brook leave), doesn’t go out of her way to be hostile or destructive, and isn’t vaguely there in a way that makes me suspicious. Apparently was the only one of the junior trio ever stated to have weapons training (with Luchere being an unarmed fighter and Hana... just being there) and was apparently dedicated enough to it to have the schedule for the different training drills memorized.

Captain Gregg - the former captain of the battle convoy. He was never seen, only ever referenced in the fic. Based on the content, he was pretty much Luchere 1.0 - crass, unpleasant, violent, and without a lot of tolerance for those that couldn’t deal with or keep up with the unfortunate matter of his everything. The notes on rewrite so far have him becoming a lot more pleasant and lot less generally awful person, though still a bit of a roughneck and unpleasant to be around if you aren’t cut from the same cloth or a similar weave. Was not inspired by Captain Clegg until I started imbibing pop culture in preparation for the various parts of the project.

Jeevenine - quartermaster of the battle convoy, bartender, and carrier of heavy butler vibes, which feels like it might have been intentional. Said to be a master of ‘improvisation combat’ but honestly seems to be the person most likely to have taught Brook his style of fencing (based on his speed and precision being noted as something Brook had difficulty keeping up with in text) and his gentlemanly ways, considering every other character I wrote into the convoy is some flavor of hot mess and either a bruiser or a gunman. Still loses points for enabling Brook’s blackout drinking habits and being passive-aggressive instead of properly helpful.

Jack Rackum and John Delacroix - sniper-spotter pair, as indicated by their nicknames of ‘Windward’ and ‘Leeward’ respectively. Highly implied to be in a long-standing romantic relationship with each other or at least in a long-term holding pattern of pining. Delacroix’s tendency to sleep in the nude is used as half of a ‘my eyes’ joke that Brook is the victim of (the other half is Maysure’s chosen nightclothes being both stereotypical of a ‘Mary Sue’ and vastly age inappropriate, which is a running gag with her). Rackum gets the most description out of the set, with his brown leather hat and green-grey hair being mentioned, along with his taste for fruity cocktails (he might also be an alcoholic, which isn’t really all that remarkable in this fic).

Kurotora Ren - Big Guy McHugeBeef. Also the guy responsible for keeping the battle convoy awash in homebrew booze. Almost kills Brook by accident during his introduction by clapping him on the back at the exact wrong moment. Doesn’t have a lot more detail than that, mostly because he slides into the background after that brief focus moment, but I like him for being genuinely sorry about the near-death thing on top of being friendly for real and not being duplicitous about his wants + thoughts.

Zest - noble. Stupid. Probably the closest thing that Brook has to a friend in his actual age range at the start of the story, which is really fucking sad considering Zest’s everything and the fact that Brook doesn’t enjoy his company at all. Somehow when I was 18, the idea of a guy who spent most of his time in some state of wasted and trying to get his ‘friend’ (who doesn’t even like him that much but seems to tolerate him more than literally everyone else Zest ever interacted with who wasn’t being paid) into a similar condition because of unrequited love or something was tragi-cute-slash-funny instead of pathetic and faintly disturbing (though I guess I might end up writing him as tragic again anyway just because it probably takes Some Shit to make a person like that). Spent 90% of his screen time in the old story making Brook’s life inconvenient and the remaining 10% fully aware that his own life is going nowhere. His personality is oddly similar to Maysure’s, which is... interesting, implications-wise. Holy Shit, is this guy going to be a trip to work with as an adult.

#the big fat one piece fic project #talking about old fic #a gentleman's tale #my writing #if you have any questions about this or other fic i've done feel free to fire away

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winx2200 · 4 years

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SasuNaru fanfic

Finally finished this. It’s not perfect but I’ll be editing it later. If anyone’s interested in reading this on another site with a better organization I’ll post it on Wattpad with the same name. I’ve never written romance before so excuse the bad use of words and I’m too lazy to edit this rn so you’re stuck with this bad version. Hope y’all enjoy!

Never Truly Gone

Part 2.

Naruto woke up, frowning at the light barely passing through the slim opening of his curtains.

“What time is it?” He asked groggily, not to anyone in particular. Opening a single eye, he felt around for his phone, groaning in glee when he finally found it. Looking at his phone, all his previous drowsiness faded away.

“Ah! I´m going to be late!” He said, getting up and questioning briefly why he was on the floor when he remembered his answer. Though it he was curious as to how his blanket and pillow magically followed him down the stairs. Deciding not to dwell too much on it, he rushed to the bathroom to freshen up before going to a very important village meeting.

He jumped out the window, stumbling upon contact with the roof of his neighbor’s yet still managing to be completely silent, as not to get another noise complaint.

Naruto hopped from roof to roof, waving carelessly to anyone who happened to get a glimpse of him. This wasn’t unusual behavior, the villagers were all accustomed to the Hokage’s care-free nature, even helping to elevate the town’s spirits in times of crisis. It was their daily routine, and they wouldn’t have it any other way.

Only a few minutes late, Naruto bust into the meeting room breaking the window and landing directly in his chair. In his haste, it almost tipped over, saved by Sakura’s hand.

“Hi everyone!” He smiled, closing his eyes. The council stared at him with disinterest, promptly getting back to what they were discussing prior to his arrival. The only one to say hi to him was Hinata, waving shyly.

“I say we just bust in there, clear them out in one go.” Sakura proposed, crossing her arms.

Shikamaru opened one of his eyes. “How about we do something… less stupid?”

The council began to argue within themselves about what their approach to targeting a group of criminals supposedly living near their area should be. According to rumor’s they were supposed to be fairly strong, one of the main reasons their village would be handling this incident.

“Hey, hey! Calm down.” He said, standing up and waving his arm as if he were talking to a bunch of toddlers.

They immediately quieted down. “Kiba and Shino will scout the place out. If they seem too strong for both of you feel free to call for back up.” Naruto directed, utilizing a more formal tone.

Kiba shrugged. “Seems fun. We’ll get rid of them quickly right Shino?” He joked, jabbing him in the gut with his elbow. “Of course,” Shino stated simply, ignoring the hit he just took.

“Well,” the Hokage clapped, “looks like we finished things here. I’ll be on my way to get breakfast-”

“We’re already done?” Ino asked, disappointed. A few of the more enthusiastic members nodded, wanting to continue the meeting.

“Oh, yeah,” Naruto started, plopping down onto the table, Sakura and Shikamaru distancing themselves from him. “I had someone follow me last night.”

The room got serious, tension beginning to settle in.

“I could sense them but pinpointing them was hard. They seemed relatively passive though. Not really something we should worry about I think.” Naruto scratched his head, picking up the train of his coat and putting it on the table.

“Though… they could be part of the group that’s been causing a ruckus. So that’s why you’re going Kiba… I guess.”

“Thanks!” Kiba boasted.

Ino facepalmed. “Why didn’t you start by this?”

“They could be dangerous…” Shikamaru added.

“I don’t think so,” Naruto said, standing on the table.

“But-” Sakura started.

“No buts. I don’t think we need to pursue them so just focus on your current missions okay?” Naruto cut in, patting Sakura’s head with his foot.

“I- get off me! - guess…” She said, pushing him off the table. The blonde landed on the ground, hardly maintaining his balance. The previous tension was instantly cut due to the silly acts, Hinata giggling at their antics.

“Now that everything is solved. Ramen time!” He yelled, putting his hands in the air and jumping out of the window he broke into, his voice fading as he fell.

The day went by quickly, Kiba and Shino reporting back quickly having already taken care of the group. For safe measure, Naruto commanded a couple of shinobi to take care of the cleanup and monitor the area.

He took an afternoon nap to make up for the lost sleep in the evening, not minding that this could ruin his sleep schedule. When came to it was already sunset, making him wonder why no one had woken him up. It was probably Hinata’s fault anyway, she knew when he needed sleep and told them not to wake him up.

Naruto smiled slightly. He has such good friends.

It was already nine and he had finished all his work so, “Time to go home!” Naruto fist pumped into the air. Outside once again, he felt the air lash at his cheeks, red dust covering them. Naruto facepalmed. “Ugh… I’m so dumb.” He covered his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Indeed you are.” A voice called out of the darkness. Naruto stopped to look towards the source of the sound, but the figure had already moved. He could sense him, but like before, he had no clue where he was. The voice was male, low and husky, the phrase short and simple. It felt familiar, as if he had heard it before, albeit not knowing when or where.

“Hey! Only I can say that!” Naruto yelled, crossing his arms over his chest with a huff.

“As if.” The voice responded, this time coming from another location.

Naruto growled and pursed his lips. “Ah!!! Fight me!” He yelled, completely disregarding that it was nighttime. Another faint voice yelled back, telling him to shut up as there were people who were trying to sleep.

“Sorry!” He said back, his blush not now only just because of the cold.

The figure, wherever he was, began to clap slowly. Naruto’s eyebrows furrowed in anger, his cheeks reddening even more. “Yes, you’re not dumb, very smart indeed.” He hummed in agreement, the amusement visible in his voice.

“I’m not dumb, dumbass.” The voice said.

“Says the idiot.” Naruto shot back.

“Imbecile.”

“Stupid.”

“Dunce.”

“Uh… You… Y-you…”

“Cat got your tongue?” The voice teased.

“Die, you constipated vulture!” Naruto quickly responded.

The figure, unable to contain their anger, flew out of the shadows jumping towards the blonde. Naruto sprung out of the way with ease, smirking at the figure. They were a few feet away apart, both illuminated by separate lamposts for the sake of composition. The stranger wore the same clothes as before, his position seemingly normal, but the slight tension in his posture showing he was prepared for any attacks Naruto planned to make.

“Haha! I got you out of the shadows!” He mocked, putting a hand on his stomach. They just crossed their arms, facing away from Naruto. “Ignoring me now? Hmph, then I will too. Good day, sir.” He joked, walking away from the individual.

Naruto waved, not looking back. “See you later!”

“Are you going to leave just like that?”

“I’m not having an argument with a vulture!”

“I’m not a vulture!”

“You look like it with that hair!” Naruto said, not bothering to turn back as the voice faded.

“And you look like you got hit by a thunderbolt!”

Naruto turned around rage bubbling up his throat. But he was met with no one, he couldn’t sense the person anymore. Sort of disappointed, Naruto walked back to his house, his shoulders slightly hunched. The person no doubt got on his nerves, but it was sort of fun, exhilarating even to be able to banter with someone so easily.

It reminded him of a previous relationship he had with somebody he used to know. His heart was doused in guilt, and Sadness threatened to spill over in the form of tears. He shook his head, trying to push his feelings down and think of something else. Like the mysterious person following him around.

His instincts were that they harbored no ill intentions, and that made him even more curious. Why him? The most dangerous person in the village? They must be confident in their abilities then, maybe even on par with his. This, however, was a little more threatening to him. He needed to be strong, to protect his friends.

Rubbing his head, Naruto looked up at the stars. He wondered if Sasuke was looking down on him.

The stranger ran away from the Hokage, a small smirk playing on his lips. It was weird squabbling with his old friends, especially when they had spent so much time apart. For some reason, they still fit perfectly, insults bouncing off each other, neither taking them too seriously.

Not that he’d admit it aloud, but he missed it. He missed being able to simply talk with his - something else he wouldn’t admit aloud - best friend. At least that’s what Naruto probably thought of their relationship. As just… friends. Even if it was a long time ago his feeling never properly went away, the strange sense of hurt and pain in his heart whenever he’d jokingly call them best friend, a feeling of euphoria consuming him anytime he’d see the blonde laugh heartedly at his sarcasm, a slight blush spreading across his cheeks, or when he executed a difficult Jutsu with grace, only to be destroyed by his boasting in the end.

God, he loved it, he loved him. And this time he spent without seeing him made him really realize and accept his feelings after four long stubborn years.

Slapping his cheeks (silently, somehow) Sasuke inhaled sharply. And it hurt. Knowing that they could never be what he wanted, and it was all his fault, not that Naruto would ever like him like that anyway.

#naruto love sasunaru bl yaoi sasuke

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aworldoffandoms · 5 years

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Runaway

A Royal Romance Story

Synopsis: Two years have passed since Queen Ariel vanished. Two years Liam has searched but ends up empty-handed. All that was left of her departure was a note. Could Ariel not handle being Queen or was there foul play at hand?

Will Liam find his beloved or is it a case of Ariel not wanting to be found?

Chapter 1: Gone With the Wind

Pairing: Liam x MC [Ariel]

Word Count: 2, 187 (give or take)

Rating: T

Warnings: Language (swearing)

Summary: Drake reminisces on the moment that tore is friend’s heart apart.

A/N: This is my first try at TRR fanfic so please be gentle haha.

This series will focus on these two (and the gang, of course, lol) and there might be some future NSFW and adult moments including sexual references, swearing (there might be a lot of swearing) and other violent situations (maybe). You have been warned and you consent that you are 18+ or at least mature enough to handle these themes that might be explored.

I’m not sure if this idea has been explored yet but it just popped in my head. I hope you enjoy!

If you want to be tagged please let me know :)

Thanks to @the-everlasting-dream, @pixieferry, @bobasheebaby and @lorirwrites for all your help, beta edits and/or advice! It means a lot!

Special thanks to @ernestsinclairs for your wonderful help with getting this first chapter up and ready :)

Present Day

There’s a knock on Liam’s study door and he calls for whoever it is to come in as he goes through the last of his documents after a long day of governance. It was a wonder he could get the right amount of sleep with the amount of sheer work he was dealing with on a daily basis.

He looks up as the door opens and his mouth pulls up in a small smile seeing his best friend stride in, a glass of whiskey already in his hand. Giving Liam a faint smile, Drake turns to glance down at the pile of documents on his desk.

“You still working this late? It’s past eleven. Do you ever stop?”

Liam chuckles, leaning back in his chair and steepling his fingers, giving Drake a shrug.

“You’d think that a King would get some time to relax but evidently that does not happen. Life of a royal.”

Drake drops himself down on the couch in the corner of Liam’s study, crossing his legs at the knee, obviously at ease.

He stares at his friend, already knowing why he was pushing himself so much. He knew Liam well. Every time a worry came up, a disruption in his life, he would throw himself into his work, drowning out the troubles with stacks of papers and the bright red wax of the royal seal. It was to get away from the memories, the thinking, the ‘what ifs’, the constant worry and the heartbreak.

He hated seeing his best friend like this but there wasn’t anything he could do. They’d been powerless for a little over two years. Every lead towards Ariel was a dead end. Every person even remotely close to her didn’t provide anything that could help them.

Drake sighs, running his free hand through his hair as he took a sip of his whiskey with the other. “Don’t you think that you are pushing yourself too hard right now, Liam?”

Liam glances up and his eyes are duller than their normal sparkle. It hangs over him like a cloud over his eyes, no real light to ignite them, and the one person that could make them light up simply wasn’t there anymore. Drake would almost be angry at that fact alone but he knew that if he brought it up with Liam, he would shoo Drake out the door again. He almost always didn’t want to hear it.

Liam doesn’t answer his question but stands up and heads to his bar cart, pouring a glass of whiskey himself, the clang of ice against the glass almost deafening in the silence.

Liam turns around shrugging at his friend. He was staying silent because he knew that if he talked about it, it would rip through his heart like a thousand knives. It always did. The loss of her was always constant. The pain had never left him even after two years.

The glint of his wedding band catches his eye in the dim light of his study, and he sighs heavily. As he stares at the physical evidence of the happiest time of his life, pain lances through him again. All those memories running through his mind before he had to squeeze his eyes shut to dispel the amount of pain and hurt that was threatening to drown him.

After a while, not wanting to torture himself any longer, he glances up at his best friend and gives him a weak smile. “I have to busy myself, Drake. It’s the only way to not think about it.”

Drake sighs, but if it was out of either frustration or understanding, Liam didn’t know.

“I understand that Liam, but there is something as working too much.”

Liam moves over to the couch to sit next to Drake, running his hands through his hair and staring into the now empty whiskey glass.

Drake straightens up in the couch and leans forward, staring into the small fireplace set in the far wall next to a green fern that Ariel had placed there when she mentioned to Liam that he needed to have a colour and a little nature in his study. Liam relented because he always did. Anything to make her happy. Drake tried his best to make his words hurt less but they didn’t do the desired effect because Liam still looked like he’d been punched in the gut.

“You have to slow down and think about your health. Over-exerting yourself isn't good for you or Cordonia. It’s not good for the country if their King is teetering on the edge of exhaustion all the time. I think . . . ” Drake paused, thinking heavily before going on. He had loved Ariel - everyone had. But it had become all consuming. Drake knew why the king looked so exhausted. He always made time to find her. Everyday he’d take time out of his busy schedule to search. “ . . . I think you need to stop looking for her. She’s not coming back. She’s gone. You have to deal with that.”

Liam glances up at his best friend. For the first time in years, he can’t help but enjoy the spark of anger exploding inside his chest.

“How can I stop, Drake, when I have no fucking clue where she is in the first place? She’s my wife. And she just vanished.”

Drake sighs, already steeling himself for his angry retort. He only said this once before and that was after the first anniversary after her disappearance, the first time Liam had laid a hand on him ever since they were kids and it was all fun and games. Drake suffered two black eyes and a broken eye-socket and he vowed never to say it again.

He risked that damage now because he loved his best friend and he hated seeing him like this. He hadn’t been himself ever since he found that note that ripped his heart in two. His heart ached for Liam. He wouldn’t want to wish this on anyone.

The thought of the love of his life vanishing gave him pause and he felt a pang inside his chest. He thanked the heavens that he had a firecracker in Olivia and that he still had her with him.

They’d all seen the exact moment that Liam’s heart cracked and shattered into a million pieces, spilling onto the floor, festering into a puddle of anguish and pain.

Two Years Ago…

Liam stood with his hands clenched in a tight fist, the knuckles turning white as he sculled his whiskey, the lines of his jaw clenching.

Drake stood there with him, wanting to comfort him but knew that it would not do any good to his mental or emotional state right now.

“Liam? What’s wrong? Why did you call all of us in here?”

When Bastien had come downstairs to the palace dining room and asked him, Hana, Olivia and Maxwell to meet Liam in his master suite, they were all rightfully confused. The royal chambers belonged to the Royals. An unusual request like this couldn’t bode well.

Even so, with their hearts sinking, they complied with Bastien’s demand and all of them traipsed up the grand staircase to meet the King’s Guard.

When they all filed into the room they found Liam sitting on the bed, face still hidden, his arms resting limply on his knees as a single piece of paper hung between his fingers.

When Liam glanced up, there was a gasp from Olivia and Hana at the sight of him. To find the King of Cordonia with red-rimmed eyes and tears streaking down his face was more than a little weird and bewildering.

They were all accustomed to the stoic, reserved King to always be in place but Drake had to remind himself that just because Liam had Cordonia to look after and should always have a face of calm, passive decorum, he was also human too.

Drake stepped forward tentatively. “Liam? You called us?”

Liam didn’t say anything, just handed the note to Drake whose eyes got wider and wider until by the end his heart was breaking too, not because of what it said, but of what it was doing to Liam.

“Oh no,” Hanna said, her voice almost on the verge of tears.

“My little blossom…” Maxwell sighs as he runs a hand through his brunette hair.

Drake finally tears his gaze away from the note and meets his best friends pained eyes.

“Liam…where did you find this?”

The king remained silent as he walks to his bar cart and only filled his glass with more than a few fingers of whiskey.

“I found it on our bed. It was propped up against the pillows with this.”

Liam turns around and walks over to them and drops in Drake’s hand Ariel’s engagement ring.

Shit.

This would definitely destroy Liam if it wasn’t already.

Drake stared at the ring some more before glancing up at Liam. “But…how? I don’t understand...”

Liam scoffs, running his hands over his face, wiping away the tear tracks like they were not there in the first place.

“Beats me. I thought she was happy.”

Drake glanced down at the letter again. He couldn’t help but read it again, the words making his heart ache for his best friend.

To my dear Liam,

I am sorry that I am writing this to you but I felt like this was the only way. Before I say anything I want you to know that I love you. I love you with everything in me. You are the best thing to happen in my life and I thank the stars every day that you walked into my bar that night.

Even writing this is breaking my heart because I know that after this letter, this will be the end. I know that this wasn’t what you expected and I understand if you are angry at me. I would be too but it is the only way for you to let me go. I knew that you wouldn’t otherwise.

I’ll be long gone after you get this. It’s not hard considering you are always working and that is not your fault. You’re the King of Cordonia. You have a duty to your country and the people that reside within it to do the best you can for them.

The last year has proven that and the changes and advances that you have done shine so brightly and I am so immensely proud of you, my love.

You have a determination and a drive to protect your country and to see it thrive and I admire that about you so much. It’s what made me fall in love with you in the first place. Your unquenchable desire to see it thrive and prosper and to see your people happy. You have succeeded with that. You are one incredible King but you are an even better man.

The last year as your wife and queen has been the best experience I could have ever dreamed of. You have made me so happy. So happy I could burst. The things that we have done together for this country is something that I will treasure forever. To work together as a team and brainstorm with the ideas that have come to fruition are some of our biggest accomplishments.

Being Queen was a responsibility that I understood perfectly. I knew what I was getting into when I married you. You had warned me plenty of times during the engagement tour and the Unity Tour what was to be expected. I just didn’t know how much pressure it would put on my shoulders. Maybe I’m a coward for doing this because I know I am. I want you to know that you should not blame yourself for this. This is my transgression to hold on to – not you.

There are only a few regrets that I’ll have after saying this goodbye.

The few things that I will regret is not seeing your face every day when we wake up together and marvelling at how a man such as you loves me. My regret is not kissing your lips a little longer or hugging you tight to me for just a few moments more or just drowning in your eyes that I love so much.

But there is one thing that I will never ever regret and that is you, Liam. You have been the greatest adventure of my life. You are the only thing that could break me and as I write this I almost don’t want to go but I have to. You have to understand that.

Please, please forgive me, my love.

Remember that I will always love you.

Yours forever and a day,

Ariel

The letter, the only clue to Ariel’s disappearance, remained the sole piece of her left. Clothes, shoes, jewellery, wallet, every remnant of evidence to know that she had once lived there was gone. It was a wonder she wasn’t caught.

The Queen of Cordonia had vanished, leaving a broken-hearted man in her wake and a country in mourning.

#king liam x mc #the royal romance #trr #choices trr #trr fanfic #liam x mc #mc x liam #the royal romance fanfiction #the royal romance au #choices stories you play

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imagine-that-one-thing · 6 years

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Styles Towers. || 18

Authors Note: With the Book coming to an end, I feel it is necessary to take a moment to write a proper authors Note. So here I go. This book started off as a ten chapter CEO fanfic that I had no intentions of attaching too or writing to this extent. On 08 DEC 2016, I posted the first chapter and I had no damn clue that just over a year later I would have turned that 10 chapter idea into two books- 39 chapters. I don't know how or why I got so attached to these two characters, I still have no idea how I came up with half the ideas that I did. This writing has gotten me through another year, it has gotten me through some hard times and some freaking amazing times. In a non-cliche way, this novel became my safe haven and now that it is over, I am not quite sure what to do with myself. I didn't think it would be this hard to finish this, and I don't mean to sound dramatic but this is quite literally a piece of me. This became my heart and soul, it is my little baby I have cherished and grown and it is now leaving the nest, in a sense. Maybe one day I will open this book back up, make some edits and maybe even continue it fully somehow into the rest of their lives, but until then, all I have left are the small blurbs about these characters I post to Tumblr. I hope you guys have relished the journey of these characters and have enjoyed reading this as much as I have writing it. Thank you to everyone that has read this and to those who have waited through the dry periods of me not posting for a few weeks and suddenly posting. Thank you for being patient and understanding. And a special thank you to my mutuals that have helped me edit chapters and allowed me to bounce ideas off of them at an ungodly hour. I am so sorry for the 3 am messages, but I promise it was well worth it. :') Thanks again, all the love - N :) Xx (There will be an Epilogue).

Master List

What a wonderful world.

February 14th, 2022.

Belatedly, Harry and I have managed to obtain common ground— after he was released from the Hospital right before Christmas— we came to a union: Harry keeps the business on the condition his hours are limited, there are no more secrets or skeletons in the closet and he takes the time to listen when I try to help him, (more so when it comes to him overworking and ruining himself) and will adjust his schedule when the baby arrives.

To say the least, we have been amply great the weeks leading up to today; Harry has been cooperating with physical therapy, he has his moments where he struggles with everything. There are some nights he doesn’t sleep because of the constant repressed memories that eat him alive from his childhood and leading up to now. There have been times we have had to leave restaurants or certain places because the crowds or certain sounds trigger him. Sometimes I have woken him from nightmares that have left him drenched in sweat and with ragged breaths. Although he has his bad days, he also has his good where the caring, loving man I fell in love with makes an appearance. As for business, Harry is discovering how to draw a line between work and business and most of all he is transforming back to the man I used to know. As for me, well, my only significant job has been to continue growing our child, Harry's words, not mine, and my job has been to help and support Harry through all this. Harry has been hesitant about enabling me to put in hours at work but hasn't had much of a choice than to just bite his tongue and get over it.

It turns out I am just like Harry; I have to always be doing something. I can't sit down and watch Netflix for too long— I go stir crazy— I guess Harry rubbed off on me.

I feel the sheets of the bed shift effortlessly and my lips curve into a smile— Harry’s awake. I observe his body warmth inching closer before his lips caress to the side of my cheek, “good morning, darling.” His voice is delicate and sweet before he settles back to his side of the bed and lets out a heavy sigh.

“Good morning, what time is it?”

“It’s time for me to get up and get dressed.” … “How long have you been awake?”

I cock my head to my right shoulder and look at Harry, “jus’ woke up.”

Harry chuckles modestly to himself before he props himself up on his side with a slight wince, “Sweetheart, I know that is a lie.”

“Just an hour, do you need me today?”

“Always need ya,” Harry responds before he leans closer and kisses me gently before he, once again, removes his lips and shifts in the bed to launch himself to his feet.

I shift my own position and relax my back on the headrest, watching as Harry shuffles his way to the wardrobe and clasps his hand to the doorknob. “I meant at work. Any CAO duties that need taking care of?”

Harry overlooks my question and draws out a button up and his suit pants, “I have a meeting at eight and nine and we have one at eleven and then I am just doing paperwork, I was thinking we could go out for dinner?”

“Oh, so you remember what today is?” I challenge.

“Today is Monday.”

I raise a brow but I decide to disregard the fact he appears to have forgotten today is Valentine's day, I can’t really blame him, we agreed not to go overboard with Valentine's Day, mainly it was my idea when I was having quite the mood swing.

Harry and I waste no time with getting ready and hurrying around the house for last minute things.

“Elise, come on, we’re going to be late,” Harry’s voice echoes the hallways.

“Give me a minute, damn.”

“You’ve had thirty, let’s go,” Harry mutters, hurrying me out the door and grabbing my coat for me, being too impatient to wait another minute.

“Why are you pissy this morning? You were fine in bed.”

Harry sighs as he presses the button to unlock his car, “jus’ stressed and my fucking wound hurts like a bitch–ignore me being a prick.”

“I had planned too,” I respond, wandering to the passenger seat of the car as he mutters something under his breath.

***

“What’s wrong?” Harry questions as his eyes are focused on the road, his left hand clutching his coffee. “I can see you from the corner of my eye,” he informs me, shifting to glance at me for a brief moment before he’s back to the road.

“I don’t really know.”

“You don’t know what’s wrong and why you’re squirming in your seat like a child who can’t keep still?” Harry questions, taking a sip of his coffee before setting it back down in the cup holder.

“I’m nauseous.”

“That’s fucking great, just when we have an important meeting,” he murmurs, not being sympathetic in the slightest way, “do you need me to take you back home?”

“No, but thank you for being incredibly sweet.” I sneeringly respond, leaning my head against the window as the car comes to a stop, early morning traffic coming to a standstill.

I overhear him groan before I sense his hand press against my thigh, without much thought, I brush it away from me, “Elle, I’m sorry.”

“No, you’re not.”

“Is it the coffee? Do you want me to throw it out?” He offers, keeping his voice pleasant and patient.

“No.”

“Don’t be mad.”

“Sorry, I’m a bit irritated that you act like I’m a burden to you. ‘That’s fucking great’” I mimic his voice, glaring over at him as he laments.

“I didn’t mean it the way it sounded.”

“Just drive, Harry. You have an important meeting to get to."

"Are we going to argue about this?" Harry challenges, leaning back and closing eyes for a moment.

We aren't going anywhere for a while in this traffic.

"We wouldn't need to argue if you weren't an arse. Good to know you still haven't learned your lesson," I grumble, hitting a nerve with him as I perceive his scintillating, loam-grey eyes sear into me as I lean back against the window.

"Oh, no. Don't try to pull that card," he shakes his head, "I put my life on the damn line and regret that night, trust me, I learned a fucking lesson."

"Clearly."

"Did you just wake up and decide you aspired to be pissy? For fuck's sake Elise, what is your bloody problem?"

"You just dismissed me as a burden because WE have an important business meeting. Again, I am second and your business is first."

He operates his fingers through his curls that are just starting to curl at the ends and he takes a deep breath, "should have gone with Logan, dammit," he grunts and I glare at him before I swat his chest, a groan escaping his lips. "I deserved that," Harry acknowledges with a dainty grin, "damn you have a hard hit, taught you well."

"Harry-" I roll my eyes, bothered with my husband that despite being an arse, I love more than anything. Nearly losing him twice almost destroyed me, and I know he doesn't mean it when he utters things similar to, 'I should have gone with Logan.' I know that it is part of his coping mechanism but it dawns on me every day that fate was on our side twice and granted him enough strength to be waking up beside me every morning.

He takes a breath, "I'm sorry but in my defence-" He clears his throat as I narrow my eyes at him and raise a brow, "fuck... I am sorry, I love you more than anything, I am an arse," he shrugs, "but I still love you and you still love me and that is all that matters."

"Smooth, real smooth."

"I know," he winks, "care to give me a kiss?"

"Not really, still upset with you."

"Oh, come on, darling, just a small kiss... I'm sorry, don't leave me hanging," he purses his lips for a kiss, leaning over to me with his hand on the steering wheel and his foot still on the break.

I sigh and giggle, unable to resist his charming enchanting, clay-grey eyes with his pursing lips. I kiss his lips lightly, "I love you," I mumble against his lips.

He pulls away and looks towards the traffic, "we're going to be here a while, this is why I hate not using my driver."

"And why didn't you use him this morning?"

Harry shrugs, "for some reason I felt like driving, I now regret it. How are you feeling?"

"The same, are you ready for the meetings?" I question, starting a very long conversation with him over his meetings to keep us occupied while stuck in the traffic.

*** ***

The moment we step into Styles Headquarters, Niall is there pacing up and down the waiting area of the elevators. I am surprised he hasn't worn the flooring thin, between him and Harry, I am not sure who is worse with pacing various domains of this building. He flicks his head towards us the second he overhears my shoes sounding against the marble floor. "Niall, mate, you look like you're about to have kittens, what's goin' on?" Harry questions as he stands behind me, his hands drawing my coat off my shoulders and down my arms before folding it over his arm and enveloping his other arm around me and stepping beside me.

"Business or personal first?"

"Business," Harry responds as I look up to see the elevator numbers descending.

"Anastasia is upstairs."

"Well yes, I would assume so considering she didn't call out and this is her work place, Niall." Harry comments as we step into the elevator and Niall follows before pressing the button to the floor we need to go to.

"Yeah, but I forgot what today is and I don't have anything planned, didn't even get flowers."

"Seems like someone else I know," I mutter, gently nudging Harry, reminding him that he seems to have forgotten that today is Valentine's Day.

Harry ignores my comment and my nudge as he looks towards Niall, "well, you're shit out of luck, ain't yeh mate?"

"I was hoping you would have some advice like you always do when I fuck up."

"Try and find reservations to a nice restaurant, if that doesn't work, cook something at home and do something romantic." ... "After our meetings or during lunch, go out and buy some bloody roses or whatever flowers she fancies, add some chocolate or wine, or buy her diamonds, every lady loves diamonds, but don't forget that this isn't about what you buy her, it is about loving each other... and no, I am not just saying that because Elise is right here listening to me," Harry informs Niall just as the elevator doors open.

"Niall, bring her lunch with flowers that way if you can't think of anything romantic for later, you at least tried with lunch," I pipe in before I step out in front of the two men and the two of them talk amongst themselves while I stride to my office. I push open my door and suddenly, I am the arse of the morning. My eyes scan my office that has multiple bouquets of roses adorned around it. My lips curve up into a smile as I shuffle closer and breathe in the scent of the roses.

"Didn't think I would really forget, did yeh?" Harry's voice distracts me and I turn on my heel to face him while he wanders closer to me.

"Kinda," I nod, "thank you for being sweet."

"You're welcome," he wraps his arms around me and pulls me closer to him, his hands falling to the small of my back, "I love you. I don't say this a lot but I am so thankful for yeh, you're the best thing to happen to me, you're my safe haven. I love you more than I am capable of expressing, no amount of roses, diamonds or any gift expresses how much I love you. Promise me one thing?"

"What's that?" I softly ask, caressing my hands to his chest, my fingertips welcoming the delicate silk of his shirt.

"Never leave me, love yeh too much."

"I promise, you kinda tied me down," I wink, holding up my left hand, "this ring kinda promises that, darling." I show him my engagement ring and wedding band. "If I haven't left after seven years of dating and nearly a year of marriage, I think I'm good," I assure Harry, leaning up and kissing him gently.

"Mhm, good. I have to get to my first meeting," he mumbles between kisses and his stubble rubs against my lips.

I press my hand to rub against his dark stubble, "you need to shave,"

He laughs, "I would have this morning, but someone, not naming any names, took too long in the bathroom getting ready."

"Hey," I benevolently press my lips against his, "it takes time to look like this."

"Sweetheart, you're beautiful either way. I will talk to you later."

"Mhm, go kick ass in the meeting."

He winks, "I plan to," Harry chuckles before he unwraps his arms from me and proceeds his way out of my office, leaving me solely with my roses and the collection of work he has for me.

*** ***

Niall wanders into my office with that adoring smile of his and bright nautical-blue eyes. “You don’t look cheery,” he instantly comments, “who’s ass am I kicking? And if it’s Harry’s, I can’t do it.” Niall snickers and I shake my head at him, lifting my head off of the palm of my hand and straightening my posture.

“What’s up, Niall? What do I owe this visit? Bring me flowers?” I joke.

“Ah, very funny... Think you have enough," he gestures towards my array of roses, "Ye' husband out here making me look like a slacker... Anyway, James fucked up on his work and I was wondering if you could fix it?” He grants me that friendly smile of his he uses when he wants me to do something.

I heavily sigh and screw up my nose, not fond of the thought of doing extra work, “Why can’t Harry fix it?”

“Eh… he’s in a shitty mood, I feel bad Fo’ James because it’s his second day and doesn’t need pissy Harry in his case.”

I nod, agreeing with him, “he’s just in pain, send me the work and I will fix it.”

“Ah, that explains why he has been pacing.”

“Yeah, he can’t sit for long if he’s sore. The bloody wound is bothering him and we all get to suffer with him.” … “may his father rot in prison.” I murmur, having no remorse for the fact Harry’s father will never witness the light of day again.

“Hm, so now I know what’s up with him. What’s wrong with you? If you don’t wanna tell me, fine. But Anastasia is about to come in here and bug you because she said you’ve been in here quietly all morning.”

I sigh heavily and shrug, “I don’t feel well at all.”

“And you’re still here because?” He challenges crossing his arms over his chest and narrowing his eyes in the same manner Harry does.

To a certain extent, they’re precisely alike, it’s uncanny.

“I’m sick of being at home. I’ve spent the last two months mainly at home with Harry. I loathe being home alone and bored out of my mind.” … “I have work to do. If I don’t get it done the CEO will make everyone work overtime until everything is finished.”

“I’m sure he will understand.”

“Yeah, he will understand… that’s part of the problem.”

“What do you mean?”

“Harry and I overheard one of the men say Harry gives me special treatment.”

Niall laughs and I stare at him, confused as to what he finds amusing. “That’s a load of bullshit, he’s much kinder to all the women then what he is the men. He’s a pushover with the ladies. That guy is just a twit, probably going to get fired soon.”

“He’s entitled to have his own opinion, Niall.”

“Yeh, the wrong opinion, Elise.” Niall shakes his head, “go tell your husband you’re going home, C'mon, no need for you to sit ‘ere and slave away.”

“No. I’m fine.”

“Whatever ye’ say, darlin’. I have a meeting to prepare for, hope you get to feelin’ better.” Niall responds with his gregarious personality and galactic smile before exiting my office, leaving me alone with my back aches, nausea and the mass of work that needs to be completed.

I profoundly sigh as I stare at the time, ten-fifteen in the morning. I tense and let out a breath, the dull pain in my back turning into a lot more than a dull pain. The pain eases up after a few moments and I breathe gradually, attempting to relax.

Harry steps into my office, “hey, Elle, Mr.Bass is here, we have ten minutes.” Harry informs me while his hands adjust his tie.

“Do you think you can do the meeting without me?”

Harry shakes his head, “it’s going to look like I am giving you special treatment. I don’t want to be at this meeting either.”

“Ha–“ I’m cut off before I can justify my reasoning for requiring to skip the meeting.

“Elle, the meeting is in ten.” Harry alters his tone of voice and becomes stern, his fulgent, smaragdine-green eyes narrowing down on me. “Don’t forget to bring those files.” Harry gestures towards the documents on my desk that are in precise order and are required for this godforsaken meeting that evidently nobody wants to attend.

Harry turns on his heel and makes his way towards the door. “Arse,” I murmur, leaning back in my chair.

“Heard that, babe.” Harry’s voice chimes and I shrug.

“You were meant to,” I respond with quite the bitchy tone of my voice.

Harry swivels on his heel to glance over at me, “I’m still the CEO, technically your boss.” Harry points out.

Deep down I know he means nothing by it, he gets pissy and tense before certain meetings– not to mention, he may be the CEO but we are still equals in this, in fact, I own 51% of the company, settling me that tiny bit over the edge of Harry. Which also means, when it comes down to influential voting within the business, I technically get the overall say.

Interesting, huh?

I give him a sarcastic smile, “my boss is an arse.” … “don’t forget that 1% leverage I have. You know, the one you insisted on me having to prove a point that the business was ours and not just yours?”

He rolls his eyes, “I am aware,” Harry grumbles lamentably, “my wife is testing my patients as a CEO.”

“My husband is just being an outright arse today.”

“Eh,” Harry shrugs, “would you like to use that1% to rule in your favour of not attending the meeting, Mrs.Styles?”

I can sense the cynicism in his voice and I can sense his lambent eyes streaming with that certainty and cockiness they inhabit when he has a cocky sneer brewing. “Fuck you.”

“Not now, darling. I have an important meeting. See ya in seven minutes,” he winks cheekily and I roll my eyes at him and release a heavy sigh.

I stand from my chair, “Harry?” … “can I have my husband for a minute and not the CEO?” I question, watching as he nods his head and steps closer to the desk.

“I can do my best.”

“Can you rub my lower back, please? I know you can’t give me special treatment but for two minutes don’t be the pissy CEO.” I semi-beg, requiring a warm hand to caress to my lower back and knead it for a few moments, anything to help the discomfort that keeps rippling through it every so often.

He doesn’t think twice before his right hand is clasped to my shoulder and his left hand is massaging soothing circles in the small of my back, “where does it hurt, sweetheart?”

“Right there.” … “owe,” I whine softly, not wanting to come off too much as a needy pest who doesn’t want to be here.

He draws his hand away and leans over my shoulder to kiss my cheek, “there you go. Your loving husband now needs to go back to being a CEO, so… are you ready for that meeting because your ten minutes is up.”

“You’re like a dog with a bone. Relentless.” I roll my eyes, clasping the data on my desk before I’m facing Harry.

“I love you, after this meeting, you can go home.”

“Why, thank you, boss.” I cheekily wink at him.

“I love you, too, Harry.” Harry attempts to mimic my voice, causing me to chuckle for what feels like the first time this morning since he left for the meeting at seven-fifteen.

“I’m not allowed to tell my boss I love him, isn’t that against the code of conduct?”

He rolls his eyes at me, “well, you never listen to rules anyway.”

“Mhm. I love you, though. But you need to tone it down on being an asshole.” I inform him as we walk out of my office and into the main area.

*** ***

“Good afternoon and welcome. I am Harry Styles and I am the CEO of Styles & Co.” Harry introduces himself to Mr. Bass, the current prominent client Harry needs, and Mr. Bass's team.

"This morning, my team will take you through all aspects of our business. With us today is Elise CAO and president, and Niall Horan, executive vice president, Chief of finance and administration and treasurer. Also here today is Charles Taylor, our director of corporate planning." Harry introduces us to the others and I am compelled to fake a loving smile yet also a firm business appearance.

This is Charles’ first time sitting in on a meeting. Harry thought it was time to permit the man do his job. After the incident with their father and the whole announcement of fuckery, Charles was put through, Harry was the one to reach out and encourage Charles.

On the agreement Charles keeps up to date with therapy sessions and administers a squeaky clean reputation, Charles gets to operate at Styles & Co to get back on his feet before venturing out and attempting to start his own business, with the help of Harry.

Their father shredded Charles entirely of the business he had started, all his assets and earnings. Their father almost stripped him of his soon to be wife.

In a way, this is Harry making up for the lost time with Logan and fixing what has been broken. Charles Taylor is now under the wing of Harry and today Charles is receiving a taste of the influential world of his brother.

As for their Father, well, he pleaded guilty to all counts he was convicted of. Since he offered his guilty plea, any reduction attributable to the plea was applied to the sentence he received. He was charged with a Level one attempted murder charge under the SECTION 224 CRIMINAL JUSTICE ACT 2003. He was sentenced to an indeterminate sentence, which means the parole board (formally referred to as the Board of Parole Hearings) determines when an he is eligible for release. He has 25 years to life. The “25" is the determinate; "life" is the indeterminate sentence. Once he serves his minimum of 25 years, he is eligible for parole but it does not mean it will be determined that he is ready to "re-enter" society without posing an unnecessary public safety risk. With the charges against him on Charles behalf, the chances of the father being released by the board are slim to none. By the time his minimum sentencing is up, he will be seventy-eight years old and to be quite honest, I think justice will be served to him and he won't live for another twenty-five years. Incarceration lowers the lifespan expectancy… to be quite honest, he should already be six feet under and buried instead of Logan.

Niall gets the slide up on the presentation screen before he is handed the reins to present. “I would like to draw your attention to the fact that this presentation does contain forward-looking statements and actual results may differ as a result of many factors, some of which are noted on this slide.” Niall gestures towards the screen as Harry takes his seat beside me, subtly taking my hand under the table.

It's something that isn't unusual, most of the times I have to sit in on the meetings, he grasps my hand. It is a bit of a sweet gesture on his behalf. For me, it is pleasing to know that he is there. On the rare occasions that I do manage to fuck up, he always manages to step in at the right time and back me up. Sometimes just a simple squeeze of his hand calms my nerves.

I glance down at the file in front of me containing Mr. Bass’s business funds, mentally rolling my eyes at the fact he is making this meeting longer than what it requires to be. It is either a yes or no on whether he is going to do business with Styles & Co.

Personally, I would have pulled out by now, mainly because he doesn’t appear like a man that is interested in doing business with Harry, I think he is just wasting our time, but Harry has a better understanding of all this than what I do.

The performance summary of Mr. Bass is fair, from what I gather of the documents in front of me. But I of all people know that past performances should not be seen as a reliable indicator of future results.

As of 31 December 2021:

Equity — 33.1% — £1,324,492.70

Bonds — 50.5% — £2,021,986.10

Property— 3.9% — £156,214.00

Hedge Funds —2.5% — £100,778.78

Liquidity Funds— 7.0% — £279,522.06

Cash— 3.1% — £123,913.25

I say his file is decent, essentially because even at our companies worst and downfall, our performance summary was much higher as a whole. Individually, Harry’s performance summary was also much greater than what I see. Then again, in the year before the downfall, 2020, Styles & Co was posting 23 billion pounds in revenue and 2.3 billion pounds in profit.

I clear my throat subtly, curling my toes in my shoes while pain travels through my back, impelling its way towards my stomach. I glance over at the watch on my wrist: Just twenty minutes since the last spring of agony. I follow the time, attempting to take deep, subtle breaths while monitoring how long the pain lasts. Thirty-five seconds, that is how long it lasts, although it seems more like ten fucking minutes.

I squeeze his hand once, twice, three times, our signal that indicates we need to stop what we are doing and leave. It has been our signal for as long as we have been together, something we have applied a few times.

I glance over at him and he shakes his head, for the first time ever, neglecting our signal.

I attempt again and this time he lets go of my hand.

If I could scream at him and strangle him right now, I would. I know he needs this client to get on board with his proposal, but I require him to pay attention because either our child is going to make its grand appearance today or something is wrong.

*** ***

I managed to get through the meeting, only mentally hitting Harry in the balls every time I felt pain.

The meeting didn’t go as outlined, Mr. Bass didn’t propose to sign the contract with Harry, I even tried to coax him and work my magic when I wasn’t having cramps.

“Now that the meeting is over, can I speak?” I wearily sigh as Harry launches a portfolio to the middle of the table.

“What do you want Elise?” He’s pissed.

I know. I get it.

He just lost out on a half a million dollar deal, but this is just another example of where he needs to draw a line between business and me.

His phone vibrates against the table and he wastes no time with clasping it with his hands, dismissing me for a moment.

“Mr. Bass, how may I help you?” Harry greets cheerily and I roll my eyes at his change of mood and tone. “I understand your concerns, as my wife pointed out, we can alter the stipulations and concerns… If we could find a way to deal with your objections, would you sign the contract on Thursday the 17th?” Harry questions and there’s a pause for a moment.

I let out a breath as I shift uncomfortably in the chair, “Hold on one second while I look at my schedule, Mrs.Styles agreed that the 17th also isn’t a good date.” I roll my eyes at the fact Harry is lying through his teeth and playing this man very well. Harry desires this deal and will go along with whatever the man says without sounding like a pushover who is desperate for the man's signature on the dotted line. “The 27th?” Harry glances towards me and I shake my head.

He needs to have the deal closed by the 25th.

“How about the 24th?” Harry proposes, biting his lip as he taps his foot.

I can only assume the man is going to put up an immeasurable belligerence against the dates. He’s not shallow, I am sure he is knowledgeable that Harry needs the signature by a certain date and is going to do his best to get the best out of Harry. “Taking all of your requirements and desires into consideration, I think my two specialised teams would work best for you. The sooner we get this underway, the better it is for you in the long run.” Harry’s not budging on advancing the man any more incentives to sign on our schedule.

I let out a breath and wince, a piercing pain making itself known, but Harry’s too busy attempting to persuade his client to sign the damn contract. “Yes, of course. We are considering specific data procedures to help deepen our understanding.” His enchanting, clay-grey eyes catch mine and he studies me warily while listening to Mr. Bass. “I completely understand your notion.”

My hand presses to the edge of the desk and I squeeze it in an attempt to divert the pain away, my knuckles turning white. “I assure you my team can handle that.” He swivels on his chair before he leans over and takes my hand, his eyes darting around, perhaps in an attempt to figure out what’s going on. “Absolutely, so how does the 24th sound?” Harry screws his nose up and I can only assume he was rejected again for the specific date.

It’s when I squeeze his hand and let out a moan while bowing my head that he becomes more alert, “are you okay?” He mouths and it takes everything in me not to lie.

I want to tell him I am, I do. But let’s face it. I’m not. And I haven’t been okay.

I shake my head and gulp, clutching his hand as my only outlet, a heavy groan of pain escaping my lips. “Mr. Bass, I will have to reschedule, I need to go.” He’s blunt and somewhat unprofessional with how he dismisses the call.

I’m quite astounded.

He puts his phone down, “what’s going on? And don’t try lie, I saw your grimace.”

I clear my throat, “I’m having contractions.”

“Like Braxton Hicks?”

“No.” I shake my head, “Actual contractions.” … “I’m pretty sure it’s time. They’re fifteen minutes apart and getting worse.”

“You’re kidding, right?” … “you still have two weeks.”

I glare over at him and blink at him for a moment, “fuck, you’re serious?”

His eyes grow wide and he springs to his feet quicker than I can blink. “Let’s get you out of here. How long? Has your water broken?” He challenges, helping me up swiftly.

“Since about five this morning. I thought it was just the usual aches and pains.”

“For fuck's sake, and you’re just now saying something? It’s bloody one.”

I shrug, “they weren’t this bad. When was I meant to say something? You cut me off when I tried to tell you before the meeting that I wanted to go home.” … “and I didn’t want to interrupt halfway through the meeting… you kinda ignored our signal.”

“Christ,” Harry murmurs, “I’m such an arse, I’m sorry.” … “Niall!! Get your fuckin’ ass here!” Harry shouts as we reach the door.

Niall looks over from Anastasia’s desk with a startled expression before he’s in front of us. “Anastasia,” Harry calls over in a gentler tone, “get my car keys from my office and bring my car to the front, please, hurry.” … “Niall walk with me,” Harry instructs as his arm is securely around me and we wander further down the office. “You’re in charge while I’m gone. Don’t take any bullshit from anyone, move my meeting at three to next week. Make sure to call Mr. Bass and tell him I am sorry I ended the call abruptly but my wife is in labour. While you’re at it, see if you can get him to stop being such a prick and to just sign the damn contract before the 25th.”

Niall nods and takes everything that Harry says as we reach the elevator that multiple people are waiting on.

The doors to the elevator open and I groan as I perceive it full off staff and people from the meeting that was held on another floor with the people who work for me. “Everyone out,” Harry instructs and Niall quite literally ushers everyone out.

“Don’t you think that was rude?” I softly challenge as Niall taps the button for the ground floor.

“Do you think I care?” Harry questions and I can’t help but chuckle to myself, “how are you feeling?”

“I’m okay right now, I have about seven more minutes before another contraction hits.”

***

By the time we step out the front of Styles’ Towers, Anastasia is standing by Harry’s car, his keys dangling in her hands with a wide smile pressed to her lips. She opens the passenger door for me and wastes no time comforting me with her sweet words of encouragement and enthusiasm. Harry takes the keys from Anastasia and politely thanks her while he assists me into the car. “You two have everything under control, right?” He turns to them both and they nod, assuring him they are fine.

There’s no doubt in my mind that they don’t have this under control— they pretty much were the backbone to the business when Harry was in hospital both times and I was the one doing his job. They coaxed me through everything and Niall took everything on his shoulders to help out the best he could. He’s a great business partner and to be honest, he should be the one who owns the business with Harry, not me. But, in all of this, Niall does get a hefty sum of finances, about 2 million pounds worth of finances.

I’m certain Niall and Anastasia along with the rest of the staff can keep things under control for a day or two.

The moment Harry gets in the car he inhales and exhales a few deep breaths, having a bit of a moment to process the current events. I can only imagine his thoughts are racing and he’s internally freaking out, if this is true labour, he’s going to be a father in a few hours— I know that worries him still. It probably always will.

He turns the key in the ignition and grasps my hand. I give him a little squeeze, waiting for him to stare at me before I give him a tender smile, assuring him that it will all be okay. He grins softly and swiftly leans over and kisses my cheek before turns his focus to the road and begins to pull out of the parking space.

“I’m really sorry for being an arse today, I shouldn’t have made you go to the meeting, I should have listened.” … “do you forgive me? I promise I’m working on being a better husband and not putting work first, it’s hard to transition sometimes and–“ Harry rambles on, and although it is incredibly thoughtful and adorable to overhear him ramble on with an apology and be entirely sincere about calling himself an arse, I’m not in the mood to have him grovel.

“Harry… it’s okay.”

“No, it’s not.”

“H, I know you’re sorry, but please for the love of God quit grovelling and drive because this contraction is fucking long.”

“Okay, okay, I’m doing my best, just relax,” Harry mutters, his eyes darken and focused on the road.

“Telling me to relax doesn’t help, Harry.”

“Baby, I don’t know what to tell you,” Harry breathes out, “squeeze my hand if you need to. Breathe, remember to breathe. There we go… talk to me to keep your mind off the pain.”

“What do you want to talk about?”

“Anything, love. Tell me about… uh— fuck, you tell me everything so I don’t know what you can tell me… oh, talk to me about that book you were reading… you were meant to tell me about it but last night but I fell asleep. Tell me now. I want all the details.” …

I chuckle, remembering that he did fall asleep on me last night when I was meant to tell him about the book because he was genuinely interested. “Before I tell you about the book, Happy Valentine’s Day, I am sorry if you had special plans or a reservation, I know you usually do a dinner for me and—”

“Hey, don’t apologise. This is more important. I’d rather meet our baby than worry about dinner,” Harry chuckles, “Happy Valentine’s Day, you’re giving me quite the gift of love here.” …

*** ***

Eight Hours have passed since I was admitted and I wish I could say it has been a lovely experience that they all rave about online and in the bloody books. No, it has been eight hours of back pain and swearing.

By now, I have called Harry every single name under the sun, and somehow he hasn’t snapped once. Not once. He has taken it like a man.

He has been exceptional the last eight hours though, tending to my every need, getting me ice chips, adjusting the lighting in the room, massaging my back and helping me walk around the room to help ease the contractions. He has been more help than I thought he would be. I honestly thought he’d crack under pressure and freak the fuck out. But, he has stayed calm this whole time and done everything possible to make me comfortable.

As a forty-five-second contraction comes to an end and I release Harry’s hand from my own, I cock my head to the side to glance at him, “I’m scared, H,”

“I know, me too,” he responds, “me too, darling.”

“No… I can’t do this... I’m not ready…”

“Hey,” he whispers, shifting a few strands of hair away from my face, “I have never once heard you say you can’t do something, believe me, if either of us can do this, it is you. You are ready. There’s nothing you can’t do. Fucking convinced you’re not human at this point. You have constantly blown my mind over the years with all you can do.”

I shake my head, “I’m not, I need more time, Harry I need time.”

“Sweetheart, don’t freak out on me, you’re the strong level headed one, you have this under control. I promise you’re ready, you’re doing a fucking amazing job, you have done an amazing job ‘til now, you’ve got this, you’re a fucking badass.”

I chuckle at his comment as I continue to take deep breaths, well aware that it is only a few more minutes before another contraction hits.

If you had of told me three years ago that I would be married to Harry and having his child, I would have laughed my ass off, essentially because, as stated several times before, Harry wasn’t really the marrying type. And when I say this, I mean it in a good way. He always said he didn’t want to get married until he was one-hundred percent ready; I didn’t expect him to pop the question out of the blue when we had talked so little about marriage. When it comes to children, I have always had an inkling he didn’t want to have children and I understand his theory and reasons for it now that he has opened up about his Father.

It’s funny how things change and how they shape so swiftly. When we had the scare while he was on a business trip, I anticipated him to react the way he did and shut down but also handle things well. What I didn’t expect was for him to have this glimmer in his enrapturing, loam-grey eyes when he spoke about kids. It was a bittersweet moment when I told him it was a false positive, mainly because we weren’t ready for a family and because it made me realise there was something that sparked in him that deep down he wanted a family. Then, when I found out was pregnant, I can’t deny the fact that I had a breakdown and had to promptly compose myself while Addalyn stared at me. I think I was the one who had the initial ‘holy mother of God’ moment. When I told Harry the news, I expected him to act out in a little bit, but he didn’t— he was happy, genuinely happy.

Either way, right now, I don’t feel like I am ready. I am not sure we are entirely ready. Sure, we have the nursery set up; we have blankets galore— our child will never go cold— we have more baby clothes than the baby really requires and more teddy bears and stuffed animals than we know what to do with, (thanks to Harry). Harry became delicate and sweet, an entire 180 from the CEO mentality. He bought our baby teddy bears and soft toys because he remembers always discovering comfort in teddybears while growing up. I never asked for too much detail, I gathered that they were his safe haven and what gave him a sense of home. Instead of asking about it all, I just let him buy stuffed toys until his heart was content.

Despite having the nursery ready and feeling as though I have been ready. I am not. Not even close.

Another rippling contraction takes harbour in my body and for a split moment, I wish it was him going through this and not me. "Fuck you for doing this to me," I mutter through my teeth.

"I love you, just a few more seconds, you’ve got this.. atta girl." … “about twenty more seconds, darling.” … “breathe, Elle.”

“That’s not helping,” I groan just as the delivery nurse strolls in with a smile.

She wouldn’t be smiling if she was in my position.

The moment I get the news that it’s finally time to push, I think my world stops.

I don’t think I can mentally or physically do this. I thought I could, but I can’t.

Harry grabs my hand and leans closer, “Hey, I can see you’re freaking out right now, I know, believe me, I’m scared too. You’re doing wonderfully. I know you’re in pain, I know you hate me right now, but in a few moments, it’ll all be worth it. I’ve never known you to give up when the going gets tough…. you’re going to make a kick-ass mum… look at me, Elle… I promise you can do this. I’m right here beside you, you’re going great.” Of all the speeches he has given me in the last eight hours, I think this one is the one that I’ve liked the most. “Put me to shame and show me how much of a strong, incredible woman you are.” He smiles, squeezing my hand gently.

He reaches over and grasps a wet washcloth and touches it to my forehead, “I have one hell of an amazing wife who’s about to be one hell of an amazing mother. I’m so proud of you, just a little more, Elle,” He’s swift to encourage me through a contraction.

*** ***

The CEO doesn’t cry on many occasions whether happy or sad, I’m the one that is more in touch with my emotional side, but waking up to see the man of my dreams with a beautiful little boy swaddled in his arms and tears down his face is something I’ll never forget. Nor will I forget his tears that I saw at twelve past ten P.M. When the nurse announced the time of arrival and soft, beautiful cries filled the room.

My eyes open as I hear the one voice that is quite literally music to my ears. I smile to myself as I hear him humming a melody that I know is familiar. Something that I remember used to be sung to me when I was little by my Dad.

“I see trees of green, red roses too,” Harry softly begins to sing, his voice brightening the room with his beautiful tone. Every rare moment I hear him sing, it makes my heart. “I see them bloom for me and you. And I think to myself what a wonderful world.” His voice is soothing, calming and the most wonderful thing I can ever hear. His voice is like spring. It is like waking up one morning to gaze out and observe the world as a wayfarer-blue sky. Heavenly, divine and captivating in every way. Spring skies are extraordinary and brilliant, and just like his voice, they're a continuum of blessings and happiness that salves both spirit and soul. His voice is like when you gaze out into a charming flourishing meadow on an early morning and your eyes catch the squillions of glint-silver dewdrops that are dampened in the meadow, the way they catch the sunrays displays them flawlessly. And just like that, Harry's voice is of that a squillions glint-silver dewdrops that shine radiantly when noticed on unique occurrences. “I see skies of blue and clouds of white. The bright blessed day, the dark sacred night. And I think to myself what a wonderful world.” … “I see skies of blue and clouds of white. The bright blessed day, the dark sacred night. And I think to myself what a wonderful world.”

I keep quiet while listening to Harry sing, unaware that I am awake and can hear him. “The colours of the rainbow so pretty in the sky. Are also on the faces of people going by. I see friends shaking hands saying how do you do. They're really saying I love you.” Hearing him sing the lyrics send shivers down my back and I mean that in the most loving way— when I couldn’t sleep at night when I was much younger, my Dad would tuck me in with my favourite stuffed teddy bear and blanket, he’d get in my little bed and softly sing the song to me.

“I hear babies crying, I watch them grow. They'll learn much more than I'll never know. And I think to myself what a wonderful world.”

“Yes, I think to myself what a wonderful world,” I join in on the last line, catching Harry by surprise as he glances over at me with his grey eyes that are a-glow with love and he flashes me an amiable smile while a few tears cascade down his cheeks.

“Hey,” Harry croaks as he wastes no time with shuffling closer to me.

“Hi,” I grin up at him, reaching my shaky hand up to his face where I wipe away a few of his tears. “Did I interrupt a moment?” I softly challenge as I gaze into his eyes and perceive nothing but pure love.

Harry shakes his head, “you like the song?”

I nod, “My Dad used to sing it to me”

“Really?” He seems surprised, “My Mum used to sing it to me.”

“That’s funny how fate works,” I chuckle, amazed by how both our parents used to sing us the same song.

Harry nods in agreement, “How are you feeling?”

“Pretty damn sore and tired, but good,” I smile.

“Here, let me help you up,” he whispers, delicately helping me to sit up while he cradles our little bundle of joy. “I didn’t get to tell you right after he was born, but you did a wonderful job, Elle. I’m so proud of you, I’m in awe of what you’ve done.” He leans down and caresses a gentle kiss on my forehead, “Wanna say Hi?” He grins, not waiting for me to respond before placing the newborn in my arms.

“Hi, sweetheart,” I beam down at our creation— my pride and joy. “I’m sorry I fell asleep before properly giving you a cuddle, I am sure Daddy made up for it… he’s really good with cuddles. We need to give you a name.” I glance towards Harry and he can’t help but just stellarly smile.

down at me.

“Thomas? You said you liked Tommy.” Harry asks but I shake my head. Harry is right from our last discussion we had about names, Tommy doesn’t suit our son as well as I had hoped. I know this just by looking down at the little boy.

“Alexander. Alex for short. He doesn’t look like a Tommy.”

“Alexander Logan Styles.” Harry nods his head with a bright smile and scintillating, loam-grey eyes. “it’s lovely.”

“Mhm, we did well, H.”

“Sweetheart, you did all the hard work, all credit to you,” Harry leans down and kisses my lips sweetly.

“Eh, you get some credit,” I wink with a bit of a chuckle. “How long have I been asleep?”

“Not long, jus’ an hour or so.”

“Oh… anyone held him?”

He shakes his head, “no, didn’t want anyone to until you had a proper cuddle.” He beams down at me, “I’m so proud of you, Elise… I am so in love with you, I didn’t think I could fall any further in love with you until tonight. I just– I ’m thrilled you’ve made me a Dad. I never thought this moment would fill me with such joy in the way it has, my heart feels full and heavy in the most astounding way possible. And I have you to thank. You’re my light at the end of a gloomy tunnel and I have so much love and gratitude for you that I can’t physically manifest and explain... I love you more than life itself and I will continue to love you until my last day on earth, sweetheart. I can’t wait to see what the rest of our lives has to offer us, darling. All three of us…”

I grin up at the man that has come a long way since I first met him years ago. He has become a man of his word, an honourable, loving man that has learned that life is a long-drawn journey. He has had his ups and downs, we both have, and we’ve both been forced to have a push and pull force with each other. He pushes me to constantly work my ass off and be the person I can be, and I pull him back when he’s drifting too far away. I keep him grounded and steady to the best of my ability.

We both have our balancing acts with each other.

We fit flawlessly together like two souls that were always made for one.

A little less than a year ago, I walked to my future, to the rest of my life, and it has been the best rest of my life I could ask for.

He has shown me unconditional love and support, has held me at my weakest and stood by me at my strongest. Harry has done nothing but encourage me throughout the years and I hope I have done the same for him. I took him as the grey-eyed man that swept me off my feet at the age of 21. I love him for who he is and what I know of him; I love Harry for everything he does, for the way he holds me and the way he put others first. I vowed to give him my deepest love and affection, to honour him, and to uplift him when the going gets tough. I vowed to be faithful, to give him my fullest devotion, and my tenderest care through the pressures of the present and the uncertainties of the future. I promised to stand by his side and respect each and every decision he makes for himself and for us. I stand by him as his wife, his best friend, and his number one fan. I vowed to love him, through sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer.

We said forever and forever it’ll be. I want to be with him until we are grey and old; I intend to love him until my world comes to an end, — Oh, but what a wonderful world it will be.

— This is our kind of meant to be; this is our story, our happily ever after—

The End.

#Harry styles imagines #harry styles prompt #harry styles prompts #imagine harry styles #harry styles blurbs #harry styles blurb #harry styles fluff #harry styles preference #harry styles preferences #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fanfics #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fanfictions #harry styles writing

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hymn2000 · 6 years

Text

Freeze - MCU AU Fanfic - C9

(Title subject to change)

Previous chapter(s): 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8

Story synopsis:- When a burst gas main destroys everything and leaves Peter with nothing, the Stark’s take him in. Thrown together by necessity, they then need to try to keep it together and build a new life. Devastated by loss, Peter doesn’t make things easy for them, and Loki and Tony struggle with their own grief and the responsibility of having someone completely dependant on them.

Chapter description:- Tony is still struggling, unbearably so, and Peter doesn’t make it easy for him. Ryan pushes Peter to breaking point

Chapter warnings/themes: character death, hurt/comfort, trauma, grief, depression/mental health issues, bullying, corporal punishment, violence, descriptions of injury

Relationships: Frostiron (Loki x Tony) (romantic), Tony and Peter (platonic), Loki and Peter (platonic)

From the same AU as Called To Be A Rock

Chapter 9 - Throw It All Away

Tony made Peter sit up.

“This is what’s going to happen” he said. “You are going to go to school. You are going to do your work, take down your homework, and you are going to come home. And after that, you will sit with me and do your homework. And then, we will do extra lessons for two hours. And then you will go to bed. That’s it. And things will continue like this until your grades are up, and a little longer besides. No objections. This starts on Monday. Now, have you got any questions?”

“...Do you think May would be ashamed of me?”

“She’s be ashamed of your grades” Tony said carefully. “Anything else?”

Peter shook his head.

“Right” he wasn’t sure what else to say to him. “Go to sleep”

“But I haven’t had tea yet”

“And you won’t have any” Tony said firmly. “Now lay down and go to sleep. That’s not a suggestion, Peter”

Peter didn’t move. Tony sighed heavily, taking hold of his shoulders and forcing him onto his back. Peter grabbed his shirt. Tony sighed.

“What are you doing, Peter?”

“I need a hug”

Tony looked into his tearful eyes and sighed. He pulled him close. He was warm - hot - and shaking. Despite his anger, Tony felt sorry for him.

“We can’t carry on like this, Peter”

“It’s so hard...”

“I know”

“It hasn’t even been two months yet”

Tony closed his eyes for a moment. “I know”

He let go of him and stood up. “Go to sleep”

He left the room before Peter could do anything to make him stay.

The mood had dropped drastically by morning. Peter was furious with himself and with the world. He was sick of being stuck here all the time.

"You said you'd take me out today" Peter said, finding Tony in the living room.

"I said maybe, if you were good" Tony said. "But you haven't been good, have you?"

"So? I'm sick of this house. I'm going out"

Tony stood up and grabbed him. "No, you're not. You're grounded"

"What?! Why?!"

"Because you're a bad kid and you're still in trouble. You stay here"

Peter pushed his hand away. "It's not fair!"

"It's not raining either"

Peter lost it. "I HATE IT HERE! I hate it! I don't want to stay here anymore!"

"Oh Peter, for gods sake, don't start"

"Well why not?! You never listen to me anyway! I wish I didn't have to live with you! I wish it was just me and Loki. We'd be better off without you!"

Tony was done being patient. "Well that's just tough! What, you think you and Loki are gonna go off and play happy families? Get real, Peter. What makes you think he'd choose you over me?"

"Shut up! I want nothing to do with you! You don't care about me anyway!"

"Oh really, is that so? I don't care? Why did I take you in then, hey? Just for something to do? Don't be an idiot. I took you in because I love you, even though you're driving me totally insane"

"If you really cared you'd never have sent me to that stupid school!"

"Oh for the love of all that is good in this world! How many times do I have to say it? Your old school is too far away from here. You have to go to the one closest to us. Is that why you've been so stupid at school? Because you're bitter about leaving your old one?"

"No!" Peter said indignantly. "It's a rubbish school and I hate it! I've said it thousands of times!"

"Yes, but you've never given us a reason, valid or otherwise"

"Why do I need a reason?! I hate it and that's all you need to know! I don't wanna go there any more!"

"Well that's just tough! You will continue to go to that school, you will do your work and you will behave yourself, do you understand me?"

"Of course I understand you! I'm not thick. But I don't agree with you so I'm not gonna do it"

"You will do as you're bloody well told, young man! If it means that I have to drag you there every day, then so be it. I'm not going to let you throw your life away"

Peter growled. "I don't have to listen to you! You're not my dad!"

"I'm your legal guardian and you will either do as you're told, or suffer the consequences of disobeying me. Your choice"

"It's not fair! I'm going to Mr Loki"

"Go then. He'll tell you exactly the same as me"

"He won't! He's just as much my guardian as you are. More, in fact"

Tony crossed his arms over his chest. "Is that so? And how did you come to that conclusion?"

"Because I actually want him, and I don't want you!"

"That doesn't make him more of a guardian. You think ‘want’ has anything to do with this? Do you think every kid out there wants their parents? Because they don't. I never wanted my father, but I was stuck with him anyway. And you might not want me, but you've got me, and I'm all you have got now"

"Well I hate you! You're a rubbish guardian and I wish I'd been taken into foster care instead of being dragged home with you!"

Tony knew deep down that he was just saying it because he was angry, but it still hurt.

"Fine, you want to go into foster care? I'll call Ms Allen then, shall I? She's an efficient woman. No doubt she'll be able to find you a foster placement today and have you out of here by tonight. Better start packing your bags"

Peter stared at him for a moment, hot tears dripping down his cheeks. "Ring her then! See if I care! I'll be glad to be shot of this place! I never want to see you again!"

"Fine, I'll call her now then. You hate it here so much? Well let's send you away, see how happy it makes you"

"I don't have to listen to this! I'm sick of the sight of you! I hate you!"

"Well go to your room then, you ungrateful little brat!" Tony shouted. "I've got a phone call to make"

"FINE" Peter yelled, and he stormed out of the room.

Peter burst into Loki's room. Loki looked up from his book.

"Peter? Hey, what's wrong?"

Peter collapsed onto Loki's chest and cried his eyes out.

"Oh sweetheart" Loki set his book around and pulled a blanket round him. He held him tight and rubbed his back firmly. "It's alright, darling, I've got you"

Tony dialled Li Allen's number, his heart thumping. He tried hard to breathe evenly. As usual, the phone was answered promptly.

"Good morning, Mr Stark"

"Morning Ms Allen..."

"How can I help you?"

Tony took a deep breath. "You know, last time we talked... You said there was someone I could call? If I was struggling?"

"Yes, there is a helpline I can put you in touch with. Is everything alright? How's Peter?"

"Miserable and difficult" Tony answered. "He's just... I don't know. I don't really understand him right now. He was always such a good kid"

"And now?" Li persisted.

"He just keeps acting out. He's been in trouble at school for hurting some kid. He played truant for a full week while I was away, and he was really deceptive and sneaky about it. I mean, he even printed off worksheets so he could pretend he was doing homework! He ran away from home the other day too. We found him at the airport. He's rude and disruptive and he's still not eating properly. And we got his school report yesterday and it was atrocious. Turns out he hasn't been doing any work at school whatsoever. I don't know what to do with him. I just keep getting cross"

Li listened patiently. "I know it's tough. People really change after they go through something traumatic. Is he still refusing to see a councillor?"

"Yeah. He won't talk to me properly either. He's still a human fountain, crying constantly. He's so argumentative sometimes too..."

"Have you just had an argument?" she asked. She'd noticed the slight tremble in his voice, not to mention the stress.

"Yes, we have" he admitted.

"How did it end?"

Tony shifted. "With me threatening to send him into foster care and him saying he hates me"

"Mr Stark, you know what I told you right at the start? It's ok to admit if you aren't coping. You and your husband are allowed a break. If you're really struggling, I can organise something for Peter. Short term foster placements are easy enough to come by-"

"No" Tony said quickly. "No, I couldn't. I couldn't do that to him. Even though he said he hates it here, even though he said he wished he'd been taken into care, I know he was just speaking out of anger. He'd never forgive me if I sent him away, even just for a week. He’d feel so betrayed"

"Ok. Well in that case, I think we need to offer some more support to you. I'll email you the contact details for that helpline. I'm afraid they just changed phone number and I don't know it off by heart yet"

"Thank you. I'm sorry, but this is just getting really hard"

"I know" she said sympathetically. "How's Loki doing? Can’t you talk to him about it?"

"Loki's great. He's always been brilliant to vent to, but he's struggling as well, and I just - well, it'd be good to talk to someone impartial, y'know?"

"I understand, Mr Stark, I do" Li said. "Now, I apologise for changing the subject, but I am glad you called"

"Oh?"

"Yes. I was meaning to call to schedule another visit. I've not had a chance to talk to Peter since we met at the hospital. I understand he was otherwise engaged during my other visits"

"Oh. Right. Yes. Uhh. When were you thinking?"

"Ideally as soon as possible. I do like to keep up to date. I understand you're a busy man, Mr Stark. Are you free Monday evening, by any chance?"

"Um" Tony thought for a minute. "Yeah, I'm free"

"How does that suit you? What time does Peter finish school?"

"He usually gets back around quarter to four"

"How does five o' clock suit you?"

Tony nodded slightly. "Five is fine. I-I'll see you Monday"

"Thank you. I'll see you then. I'll put a reminder in the email for you. Is there anything else you would like to discuss?"

"No, I think I'm ok. Thank you. For listening to me"

"Of course. It's my job"

"Yes... But thank you anyway. See you later, Ms Allen"

"Good day, Mr Stark. Goodbye now"

Tony was slightly annoyed to find Peter in Loki's room.

"Loki, can I have a word?"

Loki looked down at the boy sprawled across his chest. "I'm a little preoccupied just now"

Peter whined, covering his ears with his hands. Loki cuddled him close. Tony sighed.

"Ms Allen is coming round on Monday night"

Loki nodded. "Right"

Tony looked at him. "What's up? Have I done something wrong?"

"I'm just worried about the kid" Loki said. "He's acting funny"

"Isn't he always? He's just attention seeking"

"He is here, you know" Loki frowned.

"I'm going out" Tony suddenly decided. "Do you need anything from the shops?"

"Painkillers"

"Right. See you later then"

Ryan sat tracing circles on the mouse-pad of his laptop. He was thinking. He’d threatened to expose Peter, and since he’d done it publicly, it meant he had an expectation from his friends to do exactly that. He had to find something on the new kid, anything. The thing was, he knew very little about him. He was clever, his aunt had died, and he cried a lot. Those were the only facts Ryan knew for certain. He’d never caught the name of the man who had turned up the day Peter had pulled his chair out from under him. All he knew about him, was that he was a strict-looking businessman. Without a name, he couldn’t find out anything about him. He wasn’t sure there’d be anything bad to say about him even if he did.

Ryan sighed, looking round the grubby room and tapping his foot on the threadbare carpet.

“What should we do, Tilly?” he asked the white cat who was curled up beside him.

The cat blinked slowly at him. Ryan looked back at his laptop. He sat up properly, opening Google, and typed ‘Peter Parker’ into the search bar. He expected to be met with social media accounts, but the real results were much more interesting. The top result was a picture thumbnail, linking to a news article. Ryan clicked on it, and the web page opened, throwing the headline; ‘Ward of The Stark’s’ across the screen.

‘Not the catchiest headline’ Ryan thought.

He scrolled, and peered at the picture. His eyes narrowed in confusion as he looked at it. It was definitely the right Peter Parker, but more shocking than that, was who was in the picture with him. He recognised the businessman from the head teachers office - and he recognised Tony Stark. The Tony Stark. A distinctive character, but not someone Ryan knew an awful lot about. Usually, tabloids and celebrity gossip went unnoticed by him. He kept looking at the photo. It was a generic low-grade paparazzi shot, dated the previous year. They’d been caught unaware, and the Starks looked less than pleased. They had their arms round Peter, attempting to shield him from the cameras. It looked like it had just been taken in the streets. Nowhere special, by any account.

Well, it was who Ryan was searching for, so he continued on to the article, and his eyes soon widened in disbelief, and glimmered with excitement. He’d found exactly what he was after: something to expose. He knew why the silent crybaby had appeared now. The article told him everything he needed to know: that the explosion in Queen’s not quite two months prior had made Peter homeless and killed his aunt, and that Tony Stark and his husband (famous only for his spouse and brother) had taken him in. The article was mostly impartial, but it detailed other theories and thoughts. No one in the press quite knew where Peter had originally come from. Many considered he was an apprentice at Stark Industries, others thought Tony had been involved with the aunt and he knew the kid that way - and some even speculated that he was an illegitimate son.

Ryan laughed triumphantly. This was just too good.

“We’ve done it, Tilly! There’d better be ink in the printer” he grinned, touching her fur gently.

The cat jumped down from the sofa, padding over to the kitchen. Ryan watched her go, and stood up. He had things to do.

Tony didn't know what Peter had told Loki - if anything - but the two were definitely now in cahoots. Peter spent the rest of the weekend clinging to Loki, and Tony ended up getting left on the sidelines, feeling very neglected and upset. He could deal with Peter being distant, but having Loki near enough ignoring him too was painful. He was used to being able to cuddle up to Loki whenever he liked, and now that he couldn't, he felt incredibly cut off.

Monday morning came as a relief. Loki got Peter ready for school, but he didn’t fancy going out in the cold, so Tony had to walk Peter to school again.

"Stop sulking" Tony said.

"I'm not sulking" Peter said, sulkily.

"You are. Look, I know I got cross with you, but it was justified. I need you to be good now. If not for me, then for yourself. School isn't so bad"

"What would you know?" Peter snapped.

Tony sighed. "Don't speak to me like that, Peter"

Peter huffed and shoved his hands in his pockets.

“Look, kid-”

“I don’t want to hear it!” Peter interrupted. “You can go now”

He picked up the pace, and Tony sighed, leaning against a nearby wall. As always, he waited until Peter had gone through the school gates before heading for home.

Peter trudged up the stairs to his form room. Like it always did, his stomach started squeezing as he got closer. It was only a matter of seconds before he’d see Ryan, and get jostled by the group who always insisted on hanging about directly outside the door.

There they were again, laughing. One of them spotted him.

“Hey Peter, hey, we’re friends, right?”

Peter looked at the girl, confused. Firstly, because friendship was the last thing anyone in this school wanted from him, and secondly, because she called him by his name, and no one ever did that.

“Lend us some money, won’t you?” Another girl said. “We know you can spare it”

Peter decided they were just being stupid, and tried to ignore them.

“Heyyyy, Parker!” Ryan’s familiar voice broke through the air, and he appeared in the hall, followed by his loyal giggling rabble members. “You never told us you were a billionaire! We’ll be your friends”

Peter looked at him, the confusion evident on his face.

“Ooh, it hasn’t seen it yet!”

It was then that Peter noticed that everyone seemed to be clutching a sheet of paper. Ryan himself held a stack. He smiled, holding one out to him.

“Here”

Peter took the paper reluctantly, and Ryan wandered off a little way down the corridor to meet up with a friend who had just arrived and share the news with him. Peter looked down at the paper he’d been handed. ‘Ward of The Stark’s’ it read, and there was a picture. Peter recognised this picture. He remembered the paparazzi jumping out of the bushes, begging Tony to tell them about his kid. Tony and Loki had tried to shield Peter from them, and moved valiantly on. Loki had managed to invalidate most of their photos with elaborate and inappropriate hand gestures, but a few had turned up in a tabloid article. Tony had told Peter to ignore it, and he had. He’d been caught in the press a few times over the last few years. It never bothered him.

Peter swallowed hard and moved on to the article.

‘Billionaire’s Tony and Loki Stark have taken the next step in their relationship by having a child - but not in the conventional sense. An explosion caused by a gas main in Queens last week-’

Peter could feel himself shaking. He could hear people laughing at him, but he couldn’t stop reading. It told them everything: the death of his aunt, the people who had taken him in, the fate of the block of flats, the speculation of who he really was - it was all there, and Peter had never seen any of it before. Who had written this? Who had published it? How had Ryan found it?

Peter dropped the paper like it was red hot. He could feel his breathing getting faster. His pulse was beating uncomfortable hard in his throat.

“Shame about your aunt” Ryan’s voice called from a few metres away. “Or maybe not. After all, if she hadn’t kicked the bucket, she’d still have to put up with y-”

“YOU’VE GOT NO RIGHT TO TALK ABOUT HER!”

Before he knew what he was doing, he’d sprung forward, lashed out, and Ryan had hit the floor. Peter paused, breathing heavily, a dull pain throbbing in his still-clenched fist - and he realised what he’d done. The corridor was sickeningly quiet, everyone shocked to silence by hearing Peter’s voice and witnessing his retaliation. Ryan groaned, sprawled out in a mess of papers, blood dripping down both sides of his face.

“Uh-oh”

Peter made a run for it, and smacked straight into someone’s outstretched arm. He looked up at the teacher who had caught him, and he knew he’d seen everything. He glanced over his shoulder at Ryan, still on the floor, and back at the teacher, and finally, at the floor. He didn’t try to run again. There was no getting out of this one.

Peter felt like he was boiling over. He couldn’t stop shaking. He gripped the edges of the chair he was on and stared at the floor. He only lasted for so long before he became too agitated to stay still, and stood up, pacing in circles and ignoring everyone.

New footsteps sounded - familiar ones - and Peter looked up. For a moment he couldn’t help feeling happy to see them, but the look on both their faces was enough to shock him back to reality. Loki shook his head at him.

“Oh Peter” Tony said sadly. “What have you done?”

Ryan’s dad had been called too, and turned up in much the same garb as before - but his easy-going composure was nowhere to be seen. He recognised Loki immediately, and grabbed his hand.

“If I had known, I’d’ve put a stop to it, I swear”

The five of them were ushered into the headteacher’s office - Tony, Loki, and Ryan’s dad standing, and Ryan and Peter on chairs in front of their respective guardians.

“I’m sorry we had to call you down here” the headteacher said grimly. “But with a matter so serious as this, we needed to address it promptly”

The adults had been given a version of events, both slightly different, but the motive of Peter’s attack remained unclear, and Tony voiced this.

“I believe” the head said, holding a sheet of paper out to him. “That this may have sparked it off”

Tony looked at him, and took the paper. Loki moved closer to see. Tony felt queasy all of a sudden. He recognised this article. It was from a small local news company. He’d thought tooth and nail to keep it from getting into the national news, and even threatened to sue the paper if they printed it, just in case Peter ever saw it. It was obvious now, that publishing online had been their loophole.

“Can I-?”

Tony let Ryan’s dad take the article and read it over. He handed it to the head, turned, and slapped Ryan round the back of the head.

“What the hell is wrong with you!? Why would you go spreading someone’s personal business around like that?!”

“Why am I the one getting into trouble here?” Ryan demanded. “Look at what he did to me!”

Ryan glared at Peter. Peter glared back. Ryan had a cut and the starts of bruising on one side of his face, and a cut on the other side where he’d hit the floor.

“Can we conduct this meeting in a civil manner, Ryan?” the head said. “From what I understand, you’ve done far more damage”

Peter went back to staring at the floor and gripping his chair. He wasn’t quite sure what was going on. Everything felt uncomfortably close and hot. It had all happened so fast. Peter had been ushered downstairs and told they’d be calling home, and he’d been left in a room on his own while Ryan was being seen to in the medical room. Peter had lost it a bit, shouting and swearing and crying. Once he’d calmed down a bit, he’d been moved to the corridor, a mere fifteen minutes before Tony and Loki had arrived. They’d all been shown into the headteacher’s office about ten minutes after that. Peter was too swamped in fear and emotion to think straight. He was trying hard to hold his tongue.

“-Bullying? Where would you get an idea like that?”

Peter looked up. Ryan sat so confidently, so defiant of the accusation. His father had been told over the phone, and wasn’t happy to see his son denying it. Loki and Tony were exchanging looks.

“There’s no use denying it, Ryan” the head said patiently.

Ryan scoffed, folding his arms over his chest and glaring at Peter again. “I haven’t done anything to that kid”

“Say that again!” Peter shouted. “Say it again and see what happens!”

“Peter! That’s enough” Tony put a hand on his shoulder, and turned back to the head. “Are you sure about this?”

“Quite certain, Mr Stark. And as I informed your husband last time he was here, we won’t tolerate bullying in this school. However” he looked at Peter, who was seething with rage, tears dripping down his face, his body shaking. “I want to know exactly what’s been going on”

“I can answer that” Ryan said easily. “He started here about a month ago. He’s never spoken a word until today. He hasn’t got any friends. That’s it”

“Is it now?” The head said. “Because, Ryan Jefferson, that’s not what I’ve been told”

“Well, it’s the truth”

“No it fucking isn’t!” Peter exploded, jumping to his feet and glaring at Loki so fiercely that he drew back from his attempt to grab him. “You’ve done nothing but torment me since the moment I arrived! Why lie about it?! You obviously like the attention, so why not brag about it, you silly cu-”

Tony clamped his hand down over Peter’s mouth before he could finish his sentence. Peter pushed his hand away. Suddenly he wasn’t quite so scared of Ryan. Ryan himself was a little on edge now that Peter was speaking and showing some fight. He wasn’t used to his victims suddenly turning.

“What exactly is it I’ve supposedly done to you?” he said, not quite holding eye contact.

“Don’t act as if you don’t know! You’ve been having the time of your life”

“But we don’t know” Tony said. “Peter, if this kid has been bullying you... He hasn’t, has he? I mean, surely you would’ve told us?”

“And let you worry even more? And risk it getting worse?” he was crying properly now, choking his words through his sobs. “I’m not like this just because of May, you know”

“Darling” Loki tried to hug the boy, only to be pushed away.

“Peter, we’re worried about you anyway! Why did you ever think hiding it would be the better option?” Tony pulled him close, and Peter just about allowed it.

“What exactly have you done to this kid, Ryan?” his dad demanded.

Loki looked over at him. Now he knew what he’d meant when he said he’d have put a stop it it if he’d have known. He must have been told over the phone that his son was a bully. Ryan shrugged, but he was starting to look very nervous. His dad was very red in the face. He looked over at the Starks, at Peter.

“You have to tell us what he’s done to you”

“I haven’t done anything!” Ryan insisted. “It’s nothing!”

“Nothing! You think this is nothing?” Peter shouted, pulling away from Tony. “I don’t need to tell them what you’ve done”

“Why? Because I haven’t done anything? You’re pathetic!”

“No, because I can show them” Peter said, and he grabbed the bottom of his jumper and pulled it off over his head.

He stood there, unable to see through his tears, barely able to breathe his chest was so tight. For a while there was a horrible silence as Ryan saw for the first time exactly how much of an impact his games had had, Ryan’s dad and the head saw exactly how grievous the situation was, and Tony and Loki realised why the boy had flinched so much when they’d hugged him recently.

Peter’s torso was a mess of grazes and cuts and bruises at various stages of healing. His stomach was 90% bruise, an ugly mix of black and green and purple, with the cuts of fingernails unmistakable on one side.

Loki was the first to crack. This surprised everyone, and horrified Peter, who started crying again as a result.

“H-h-hey, Mr Loki, don’t cry! I didn’t want to make you cry!” Peter gabbled, and started sobbing.

“How could you not tell us about this?! How could you just let him hurt you?”

He pulled Peter close, holding his jumper round him to cover at least some of him, and rocked him while they both cried.

Tony slowly turned to look at Ryan’s dad, who looked every bit as horrified as he felt. He looked over at the head, who had gone very white in the last few minutes.

“When the teachers told me you’d been bullying him, I never imagined anything like thi-”

“Hold on, you knew about this?!” Tony said.

“On the contrary” the head held a hand up defensively. “I only found out today. But some of the teachers have been aware of the situation for some times now, and they’ve told me as much”

“What, and they just stood by and let it happen? They just let this little thug do as he pleased? I don’t believe this!”

He looked at Loki, who had composed himself a little, but was still very much occupied with holding Peter protectively. Tony moved closer to Ryan and looked down at him. Ryan shifted uncomfortably.

“I don’t know what possessed you to do what you’ve done, but what you did goes far beyond playground bullying, which is bad enough in itself. This is violence. Why would you do it?”

Ryan shrugged. “Bit of fun”

“Oh, is that what you call it?” Tony said, his voice dangerously calm. “Well let me tell you something: a ‘bit of fun’ doesn’t constitute ABH. You think this is ok, that you can keep doing this kind of thing your whole life? You can, and will, end up in prison. Heck, you could go to prison now. Do you want to go to juvie? Because that’s where you’re heading”

He stepped back, if only for his own sake. He noticed Mr Jefferson staring at him. He looked at him, and for a split second, imagined what he must be feeling. Tony had been upset and angry when they’d thought Peter was a bully, even though now it had been proved to be a falsehood. But Ryan was very much a bully, and there was no denying that. He couldn’t quite comprehend how horrible that must feel.

“Are you going to press charges?” he asked, his face grey.

Tony looked at Peter, clinging helplessly to Loki, many of his bruises still visible despite the jumper being held round him.

“No” Tony said, and he turned back to Mr Jefferson. “I’m not dragging my kid through courts and police interviews and statements. He’s suffered enough. And you shouldn’t have to go through all the same just because of what your son did”

“We need to decide where we go from here” The headteacher said.

Ryan stared at the floor. Being the centre of attention wasn’t so good now. Truth be told, he felt sick. He’d never been called out on his behaviour before, especially not like this. What was going to happen now?

Peter pulled away from Loki, put his jumper back on, and sank back into the chair, looking at nothing in particular and trying to decipher his feelings.

“I can’t believe your teachers knew what was happening and didn’t do anything about it”

“It will be investigated” the head looked at Mr Jefferson. “Would you and Ryan give us a few minutes?”

“Yeah..” Mr Jefferson hauled Ryan up from his chair and pushed him towards the door. He went over and took Loki’s hand. “I am so sorry”

Loki shook his hand encouragingly. “It’s not your fault. You weren’t the one who hurt him”

Mr Jefferson found himself in front of Peter. He looked terribly small.

“If I had known sooner, I would have put a stop to it. I swear” he said. “He should never have been allowed to get away with it... Take care, kid”

Peter pressed his hands down hard over his ears until the sound of the blood rushing in his head was louder than the grown-ups arguing. Tony and Loki were annoyed at themselves for being so oblivious to what was going on, and angry that the school knew and did nothing about it. They didn’t know what to do next, and could only argue the options.

Eventually, a brief silence was broken by Tony.

“This isn’t working” he said, looking at the headteacher properly. “I really do appreciate what you’ve done, understanding Peter’s situation and taking him on such short notice, and keeping us from being common knowledge. But this just isn’t working. He’s miserable, and with good reason. That kid had done horrible things to him. I don’t blame you - but I blame your teachers for knowing and doing nothing about it”

“I can’t apologise enough” the head said. “They should know better. I will investigate it. It’s not good enough. I’m so sorry that Peter came to such harm here”

“I appreciate it” Tony said. He looked at Peter, and sighed heavily. “I’m sorry. I’d like to withdraw Peter from the school, effectively immediately”

The head nodded slowly. “I imagined you would. I have no objections. He’ll never feel safe here after what happened”

He stood up and came round from behind his desk. He stood before Peter. Peter slowly opened his eyes and looked up, taking his hands away from his ears.

“We saw your grades. Your old school sent them to us. You’re clever. You’ll go far, given the right environment. I really do wish you all the best for the future” he held a hand out to him, which Peter took shakily. “Goodbye, Peter”

Peter was exhausted by the time they got back to the house. They’d left the school at 11.30am, and Tony had taken him straight to the doctors to be checked over for any serious damage (thankfully none was found) before finally returning home.

They all three sat on the futon in the back room. For a while there was numb silence, but then Tony collapsed. He held Peter close, and Loki held the both of them, and together they all cried and silently cursed the Earth for being so cruel.

#my writing #fanfiction #mcu #marvel fanfiction #mcu fanfiction #frostiron #peter parker #spiderman homecoming #this is super long omg #and yknow I said it'd take me an hour to finish tonight?#it's taken me nearly two and a half

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