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erenthology · 6 months

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Drabble but I had to make it pretty :3

Eren is pretty nosy. When he visited your dorm for the first time, he went through everything in your room, shamelessly. You were lying half naked waiting for him, meanwhile this dude was smelling your perfumes.

“‘Hmm, what’s this? ‘Who’s this in the picture with you?”

“His name is Dave, he was my prom date.” you tell him, growing irritated.

“He’s ugly.” He puts the photo facing down and joins you on bed but sits down instead of pushing your head into the mattress fucking you raw. “are your sheets linen? Is that what you prefer?”

You stare wordlessly, this was not how you expected the infamous collage star to to act when invited into your dorm. You usually meet at his place because he insists to always pick you up and have you spend the night at his. So when you asked him if he wanted to come to your place you instead, you could swear you saw his eyes sparkle.

You put your feet on each side of his shoulders which gets him to glance down in between your legs. “Wow, you want to fuck me so bad.” he tilts his head to the side as if to get a better look.

He’s on his knees, hovering over you as you’re lying down with your legs open “Keep talking like that and I’ll find somebody else to fuck me.”

He raises an eyebrow, “keep saying stuff like that and you’re gonna get punished.”

“By who?” you clench your thighs.

His eyes track the dirty motion of your hips and licks his lips as if to taste you. “only me. why, is there someone else on your mind?”

“I mean, dave did hit me up recently. he’s grown quite attractive.” you like being petty.

Not even a crack of a smile. “You know, when you say stuff like that, it makes me want to fuck you silly.” he delicately strokes your cheek.

Huffing out a breath, you’re about to tell him to go ahead but get interrupted by him tracing your lips with his fingers. “Your lips turn down at the edge,” he smiles, “you have the perfect pout.”

Your breath hitches in your throat, not really used to being treated like this. Eren keeps surprising you and yet you find ways to ignore it. But you have a feeling that he’s fully aware of your antics and is being patient with you.

“So?” you dart out your tongue around his finger. “want to see it wrapped around something other than your finger?”

He adjusts his boner and pushes your legs down around his waist. Gazing into your eyes, he calmly speaks. “you have no idea how much I crave you. every second of every day.”

Swallowing hard, you feel the tension in the room about to snap. He lowers his body and pushes your legs up, folding you in half with his body weight.

Face to face, Eren looks at your searchingly. He’s waiting for you to kiss him, he wants you to show him you want him. So your hands reach for his face, and you brush your lips against his. He sighs a breath of relief, as if he’s been holding it it this whole time, and kisses you back.

Feeling content, he draws back and watches as you’re unable to open your eyes for a few moments afterwards. Eren smiles and releases your legs, then viciously hugs you and starts rocking you back and forth.

“You’re so cute.” he squishes you.

“stop, I’ll cut your teddy bear the next time I’m over Eren I swear.” you threathen harmlessly. He gasps, “first of all, Eldy is not a teddybear he’s my son.” he jokes back. Laughing at his antics, you realize you’ve gotten further involved with him than you might’ve realized.

The inside jokes, he kissing and unnecessary cuddling. As if noticing you’re drifting away, he puts you on his lap and grabs your laptop. “Let’s watch a something.” he strokes your thighs.

“Dibs” you both say on the same time. Turning to face him, you yell “supernatural” again, at the same time.

He stares intensely, “oh baby, you were so made for me.” he draws out enthusiastically. “Yeah yeah, just put it on.” you turn your face back to hide your blush.

Your bodies are tangled together, he holds you as if you complete him. Legs in between yours, arm around your torso, you’re surrounded by him. “Eren, did something happen?”

You can tell this makes him happy. “you care about me.” he smiles cheekily and kisses your cheek. So that’s the reasons he just wants to hold you.

“So, what’s wrong?” you forcefully let out. It feels a bit uncomfortable but you can tell he’s not uncomfortable at all. “Don’t worry about it, just let me hold you.”

“Fine.” you don’t know why you make it sound like you’re irritated, you’re not. But Eren doesn’t say anything, you have a feeling he’s learning how you work and actually understands you. Either way, you let him hold you.

#was i need of slight comfort so idk why it ended sweet i planned on having him dive in between your legs but life is unexpected I guess!#btw this is rugby Eren getting you to lower your walls(if you read the prev drabble ykyk)#i have noooot read through this but atleast the header is pretty<3 hihi #you can send me asks if you want to read something in particular #eren smut #attack on titan eren #eren #eren jeager x reader #eren aot #eren fanfiction #eren jaeger #just in the clouds for eren #eren x reader #eren yeager x reader #Eren fics #Eren x you #Attack on titan

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millyhelp · 4 months

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Other guy

DILF!Dick Grayson

warnings: fluff, comedy, Dick being a dad.

Notes: I saw a video on tiktok and decided to write about it. I can imagine something like this happening !!

Ask me about dilf!Dick!!!

You were cheerful and happy as you prepared breakfast for your boys. Dick and Johnny were sitting at the table.

Dick reading a newspaper and Johnny drawing something with a crayon.

"Mommy?" Johnny called you and you looked at him for a moment.

"Yes, my love?" you smiled looking at the small copy of Dick concentrating on the drawing. Brown curls and a pair of cute eyes like a puppy.

"Who was that guy you kissedy last nighty?" The cute and innocent voice made you freeze. "It's ugly kiss another guy, mommy!"

Dick stopped reading the newspaper and looked at you with furrowed eyebrows.

"Guy? Which guy you mean, Johnny?" It was his turn to frown.

"Mamaaa. That oniii!!" The little boy remained focused on the drawing

"Who did mommy kissed yesterday, Johnny?" It was Dick's turn to ask.

"Yeah, Johnny. Who I kissed?" You ask curious too

"Nightwinga." Johnny said and you sighed in relief. "Mommy kissedy nightwinga."

The wrong words came out of his mouth with so much love and care. Dick still hadn't told the little one that he was a superhero when they needed him, after all he was retired and just worked as an ordinary civilian.

"Mommy has good taste." Dick said smiling and looked at you and winked.

"I wouldy be jealousss, papa." the little one sighed "I wantedy to beat him, papa. BUT! I was sleepy and I went back to my bed."

You laughed and Dick looked at his son impressed.

"We must be more careful next time." you whispered to Dick without Johnny seeing.

This little boy, just 5 years old, was very smart. Just like his dad.

I JUST LOVE THIS LITTLE BOY!!!

#dick grayson #dick grayson fluff #dick grayson headcanon #dick grayson smut #Johnny Grayson Y/L #dilf!dick grayson #dick grayson masterlist #dick grayson x female!reader

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weebsinstash · 10 days

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I know you mentioned that you aren't a big fan of pregnancy AU stuff in Hazbin, but hear me out...

Imagine Yandere Valentino getting his Darling pregnant to have a living bargaining chip to make sure she doesn't even try to leave him

New idea. What if the only people who can procreate in Hell are red string soulmates, or, it's like akin to ABO in the sense that not everyone or every combo of people could create a baby.

I was thinking about a yandere Valentino who has Reader as his red string soulmate whatever and you run away after seeing how truly abusive he is to other people, worrying for your own safety, and you're missing for like a straight year before Valentino finds out where you are, and... he's all but KICKING DOWN the door of your apartment, and he's looking at you like a hungry predator ready to pounce on you, cornering you, and

a baby starts crying from the other room and you're SPRINTING to the noise and Valentino finds you defensively holding a little bundle to your chest, growling snarling baring fangs holding a knife whatever at him, and Valentino thinks you adopted some other man's kid, some little imp bastard or something, and he's furious, he's raising his voice, he's getting closer, he's-

making perfect eye contact with a little tiny baby replica of himself as it turns to look at him with its big red eyes and chubby cheeks and fat arms and. It takes Val a few seconds to process it. The baby looks right at him and is whimpering and gurgling, upset, but doesn't cry. The baby boy sneezes and his antenna flip back and forth. He's got lil hearts in his fur and his teeny antenna are already so fluffy.

'Oh but aren't baby moths technically caterpillars--' shut the fuck up, you're demons and also that would be ugly as fuck. You want to give birth to a 20 armed baby or something. No. We save the truly inhuman babies for the human x monster/alien/whatever prompts. Your baby comes out a mini mothperson and it's fluffy and chubby and fucking adorable and also shut up

Val is just, SMITTEN, the narcissism is turned up to 100, he's rapid cycling emotions, "*GASPING* OUR BABY IS SO FUCKING CUTE, WHAT THE FUCK, I WANT TO HOLD HIM" "So I knocked you up good huh 😏" "*already on the phone in a group call with the other Vees and taking 200 pictures* you should see this thing, he looks just like me, can you even believe that, I can already tell he's gonna be so handsome and successful cuz he's MY son" "aw, amorcito did you think you needed to run away to protect our baby because I have so many enemies? You're such a good mama ❤️❤️❤️"

You spend like MONTHS lovingly protecting and sheltering your child until he's a healthy giggling little chubroll and Val has him for like two days and suddenly your baby has his ears pierced with diamonds in them and Valentino is walking around in his high heels and slutty bodysuits with your son in a papoose cuddled into his chest fur. You're holding your sleeping son while Val is beside you and someone sneezes across the room and the baby stirs and here's Valentino, "SHUT THE FUCK UP, MY SON IS SLEEPING", like, NOT ANYMORE YOU DUMB JACKASS???

'Oh gee why is Valentino suddenly funding and producing more erotic films involving moms and breeding and pregnant people and lactation-' you fucking know why and honestly I think it'd be SO FUNNY if he's like, "oh yeah, don't worry, I want you on birth control too mami. I missed fucking you and I kinda wanna do a lot of that without worrying about another little niño or two. At least not for a while :)"

Valentino on the red carpet being his cunty fashionable self while his baby is in a sling and they're both wearing matching outfits. Your baby boy has a tiny iced-up watch that's worth more than the entire building you were living in before his father found you. Your "husband" is posing half-naked with your baby on the cover of Demon Playboy which he owns, "HELL'S HOTTEST NEW DILF" like I COULD NOT WITH THIS MAN

And obviously he's got new kinks now that you're a mom and he absolutely fucks the hell out of you to the point you would get pregnant again without the birth control 😳 valentino on some real "is this the milk you've been feeding my baby with, let me try some" type stuff where he's milking you dry during his bang sesh and your son has to have formula that night because your tank is EMPTY 💀 YOU'RE A RAISIN LIKE THAT SCENE FROM SCOOBY DOO ZOMBIE ISLAND--

God. I've read horror stories about women getting pregnant again even WHILE being on multiple types of birth control so, then you get knocked up again Because Of Course You Would, You're Taking More Creampies Than A Professional Rodeo Clown, and what does Valentino say? "Fuck it, I wanna keep it! I can't just MURK my baby after it beat the odds, that's so ME!" And now you're having twin girls 💀💀💀 who knows, maybe having some daughters would teach Valentino to actually respect women--

I feel like you would wake up one morning and be genuinely hysterical because your baby is missing and you can't get in contact with Valentino and you're freaking out at the absolute highest level and it turned out to be some dumb shit like Val just took your son along with him for THE ENTIRE DAY and didn't think of mentioning it to you because "but you were needing a break and we were bonding, mami. We were having our guy time. I was leaving for work and he looked at me and he SMILED AT ME. What the fuck was i supposed to do, I couldn't just LEAVE HIM, he wanted his papi"

Of course, all these ideas hinge on the concept of Valentino actually caring for his baby. He could still genuinely use it as a tool against you. You're out running errands and suddenly you're getting a call. It's Valentino. He wants you to come home; you left the baby with Kitty so you could go out for a little while for some 'you time' since you've been trapped at home hiding ever since you ran from him before learning you were pregnant. It's not even about you leaving the baby with a nanny; it's about you not being home when Valentino came to visit you and him being uncomfortable not knowing exactly where you are and exactly what you're doing

Well, you got a little smart with him. You've just spent the last about 11 months living through hell with your pregnancy and hiding; you deserve to get some fresh air and walk out on the town and--- in the middle of you lecturing him you can just hear your baby making baby noises through the phone and Valentino just adopts this... tone in his voice, "amorcito, I came to spend time with you and our little frijolito and you're not heeee~ere. You know I can have trouble concentrating when I've had a few drinks and, earlier i dropped my phone on accident and i thought 'oh, it's good i wasn't holding something important"

You're home within 20 minutes and Valentino is cuddling into you while he puts some garbage on TV and pretends not to notice how you're trembling as you hold your son and send the occasional wary glance his father's way...

#valentino x reader #yandere x reader #yandere hazbin hotel #hh #sinprompts

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riordanness · 5 months

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wildest dreams - [p.jackson]

1.3K wordcount

warnings: none

requested: yes!! (anonymous)

“In your wildest dreams, Jackson,” I scoff, staring down the boy fiercely. My sword in hand, my battle armour on, I was easy to beat this stupid son of Poseidon once and for all.

He grins at me, his smile slightly lopsided. “Okay, Red,” he teases. “Bring it on.”

I roll my eyes at the nickname. He’s been calling me it ever since he came to camp, two years ago. Ever since he found out I was the daughter of Ares, and I lived in a big ugly red cabin with a terrible paint job. I mean, I hate the cabin’s decor as much as the Aphrodite kids, but that doesn’t mean Percy Jackson gets to insult me.

I yell, and charge at him, our swords meeting in midair with a clang. I whirl, aiming for his unprotected side, but he blocks me, sidesteps, jabs at my stomach.

I stumble back, slashing at him, as anger flashes through me. I want to beat him. I have to beat him. This has been going on long enough, and I need to get my revenge.

Two years ago, Percy Jackson came to Camp Half-Blood. On his first proper day here, he tried to drown Clarisse, my older sister, and two of our other siblings. He made a fool out of Ares cabin. Then, later that summer on his stupid lightning bolt quest, he fought our father, the god of war himself, and somehow, he won. He ruined Ares’ reputation completely.

Ever since, I’ve wanted to turn Percy into a Poseidon pancake.

“Come on, y/n!” Adam, my favourite brother, cheers from the side of the arena. “Beat Jackon’s ass!”

“I’m trying!” I shout back, as Percy manages to catch the hilt of my sword in his. He’s stronger than me, and taller. He pushes down, fighting against my strength. Then, as he’s pushing his sword down, he suddenly twists, and I’m forced to let go. My weapon clatters to the ground.

There’s silence from the bleachers. Every camper there, who came to watch us duel, has no idea what to say.

I have a lump in my throat, and I don’t know how it got there. A sudden, overwhelming feeling of defeat grips me, and I send a tearful glare in Percy’s direction.

“I hate you.”

I shove past him, hoping my final words sting him as much as my loss to him stings me.

“You should let this go, you know?”

I glance up in surprise. Leah and I are on stable cleaning duty today, which is an absolutely awful job, in case you were wondering.

“Let what go?” I ask.

She waves her hand aimlessly in the air. “This whole… Percy Jackson thing.”

I raise my eyebrows, disbelieving. “You want me too, what? Forgive him?” I make a sound in my throat that’s almost a gag, almost a growl. “Hell no.”

“Come on!” Leah pleads. She’s the daughter of Athena, with pretty dark skin, dark braids, and warm dark brown eyes. She’s shorter than me, but way smarter and prettier. We arrived at camp almost the same time, three years ago. I’m still not sure why she likes being my friend, but I love Leah.

“Look,” she sighs, leaning against her broom. “I hate Poseidon as much as the next girl, and Jackson isn’t exactly my favourite person.” She grimaces, probably remembering the time Percy messed up and made her team lose at Capture the Flag. I’d won that day, so maybe I should thank Percy for his service.

“But,” Leah continues, “he’s not really a bad person. Like, yeah he’s a total dumbass and annoying and way too cute for his own good–”

“What?” I half groan, half laugh. “No he’s not.” I try to believe it myself.

Leah ignores me. “He’s not worth making your enemy.”

I sigh. “I guess you have a point…” Even saying that feels wrong. I want to hate Percy; I want to get my revenge and prove for once and for all that Ares isn’t lame, that we can be great.

But, Leah is right. There are bigger things to worry about now. There are rumours; Kronos is rising. Luke Castellan is making an army. Camp Half-Blood will be going into war.

I realise my grip on my pitchfork is so tight that my knuckles have turned white. I let go of the pitchfork, watching it fall into the straw on the stable floor and almost disappear.

“Go.” Leah gives me a little shove. “I saw him doing paperwork sorting for Chiron on the porch a little while ago.”

I give her a quick nod, brace myself, break into a sprint, running towards the Big House.

I spot Percy long before I reach the Big House porch. As I near, my footsteps slow to a walk, and I have to force myself to take a deep breath, striving for calm. My temper isn’t easy to control.

“Hey,” I call, taking the front steps two at a time.

Percy half-glances up, looks back down at his pile of letters and documents, then double takes at me. “Y/n?”

I try for a smile, waving at him with my fingers. “What’s kicking?”

“Uh–paperwork,” he replies, looking at me in slight confusion, probably wondering what I’m doing here. “For Chiron?” he adds quickly, then scrunches his nose in a way that almost makes me want to agree with Leah about Percy being cute. Almost.

I nod. “Sounds like torture to me.”

Percy grins wide. “Tell me about it.” He waves the stack of papers in the air as he gets to his feet. He’s only standing half a metre away from me now, closer than we’ve ever been without trying to beat each other up. “I never remember how much I hate being dyslexic until I try doing this.”

I bite the inside of my cheek, suddenly having no idea what to say. Percy seems to notice the awkward pause, and frowns uncertainly at me. “Why are you here, y/n? I doubt it was for just a chat.”

I let out my breath slowly. “Uh—yeah. I came to make out—I mean up! Make up.”

Percy tries to hide his smirk, and fails. I feel my jaw ache from clenching it. All my old hatred for this boy bubbles almost out of control, but I fight it, like I fight everything, and this time I win.

“Okay…” Percy muses. “Y/n, the daughter of Ares, god of war, wants peace.” He stresses the last word. “Not to mention I humiliated both her older sister and her father, when I was twelve.”

I grit my teeth and glare at him. “Do you want me to pulverise you, Jackson? Because I will.”

“Oh really?” Percy has an eyebrow raised. “But I thought you came to make up? Or was it out?”

“Why did I let her convince me to do this,” I mutter, already ready to just make a run for it. But no. Leah was right, albeit pretty frustrating and exasperating and extremely embarrassing. I did need to end this somewhat ridiculous rivalry with Percy. And I guess it was now or never, right?

“I’m sorry,” I blurt out before I can change my mind. “I’ve been stupid and selfish and I’m sorry.” I hold my hand out to him. “Friends?”

Percy stares at me, then my outstretched hand for a count of three. At first, I was almost certain he was going to leave me hanging. That would be so like him! But then, he grins, that adorable, dumbass smile I’ve known for so long now.

“I don’t want to be friends, Red,” he says, his words solemn and his tone teasing. “I’m in love with you.”

#percy jackson #pjo #fanfiction #fanfic #pjo fanfic #percy jackson x reader

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cubarsis · 1 month

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Baecation | p. cubarsí paredes

— Synopsis : Pau took his girlfriend with him for vacation, of course he can’t resist showing her off to the world!

— SMAU

— pure fluff

liked by fcbarcelona, marcguiu9, hctorforrt_ and 367,569 more

tagged : yourusername

paucubarsi: escaped barna with the loml 😽

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user1 : Bro be living the dream since his mvp award

yourusername : real but as he should

user2 : Pau where do we find a girl like urs

paucubarsi : simply can’t find another woman like that, try going for your best mates sister for the thrill

user2 : 🫡🫡

fcbarcelona : Looks like Pau is enjoying some well-deserved downtime with his girlfriend! They look so happy together 💑

liked by paucubarsi

marcguiu9 : damn you went without us ??

paucubarsi : lo siento hermano 💔💔

paufan : hard to be sad when I see Pau and his gf posting on ig

ynfan : real I love them more than they love each other

user3 : free therapy I swear

yourusername : my man

paucubarsi : proud to be 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨

likey by paucubarsi, lamineyamal and 2,074 others

tagged : paucubarsi

yourusername : impossible to separate him

view all comments

user9 : Okay, Pau and his girl make us straight-up all wish we were on vacay with them 🌴

liked by paucubarsi

lamineyamal : cuteness overload 🤭😻💞💞

paucubarsi : please just shut up 😭

lamineyamal : freak

paustan : Yasss! Even ballers need some downtime, and they’re slaying it!

liked by yourusername

yourbestfriend : adorbs!!!

yourusername : told ya he looks better irl than on those pictures back then

paucubarsi : 👎👎

iloveyn : yn and her man = ultimate couple crush

user3 : I want both it them so fucking bad

user 4 : ikr?? She gorgeous asf, he a cutie, what do we want else

liked by hctorforrt_, ilovepau, pablogavi and 405,007 others

tagged : yourusername

paucubarsi : love it here, and even more with my woman 🤍

view all comments

yourusername : pauipookie stop, you’re making me actually gonna tear up from this 🙁

paucubarsi : I love you so much

yourusername : we’re in the same room, stop texting me and give me a kiss

liked my paucubarsi

paucubarsi : 🫡

pauandyn : the way he calls er 'his woman' 😭😭 he’s so boyfriend and husband

user7 : if they break up I ain’t gonna believe in love any longer istg

hctorforrt_ : sexy

paucubarsi : me or my girl ?

hctorforrt : both.

marcguiu1 : my son is growing up so fast, bagged a girl and already out the country with her 😪

liked by paucubarsi

user10 : this guy mad ugly she could do so much better 💀

yourusername : you better sleep with one eye open lil bro 😭🙏

posted to story

paucubarsi

hope you liked those flowers, handpicked just for you 🩷

yourusername

Pau 🙁🙁🙁 stop making me melt in the grocery store

paucubarsi

Bare minimum for a pretty lady I call my girlfriend, if you ask me

When will you be back ??

yourusername

I’ll be back in 10, are you okay, baby ?

paucubarsi

mhmm, just missing you, hermosa :( I know we see each other all day but still

yourusername

nvm I’ll be back in 5.

liked by paucubarsi

liked by marcguiu9, lamasia and 398,762 others

tagged : yourusername

paucubarsi : night out with my love, happy two years anniversary ❤️

view all comments

user1 : time flies seeing them so happy together 🤧

user2 : I wanna be them so bad

user1 : us ?

user2: say less 🤭

yndefender : the way he looks at her 🥹

liked by paucubarsi

lamineyamal : simp

paucubarsi : don’t tell me you wouldn’t be one if you had her ??

yourusername : Here’s to many more adventures and memories together, love you endlessly💕

paucubarsi : The things you do to me 😵‍💫

user56 : the way he flirts with her in his comment section, he’s so in love

user9 : Bro impossibly down bad for his girl, ain’t nobody can blame him tho

user8 : Lamine so right about him being a simp

hctorforrt_ : you gotta let me be the best man to your wedding

liked by paucubarsi

fcbarcelona : our favorite couple❤️💙

hectorth 24

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conazo · 2 months

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Valentino writing tips: language

I’m not an expert by any means, but I thought I might provide some insight into how I, personally, handle the nasty moth's dialogue.

Like all languages, Spanish is highly regional. We don’t really know Val’s actual background as a Sinner, so your guess is as good as mine. Given his VA is Puerto Rican, however, I write Valentino as someone who speaks Caribbean Spanish (like me!). The three Spanish-speaking countries/territories in the Caribbean are: Puerto Rico, the Dominican Republic, and Cuba. I'm not familiar with Cuban Spanish, so we'll focus on the first two for now.

Some of these are more specific to one place than the other, but I’m mushing them together for simplicity’s sake (don't come at me).

Fun quirks of Dominican and Puerto Rican Spanish:

A habit of shortening words, like “ven pa’ca” (“come here”) instead of “ven para acá.” We frequently eat the letters “r,” “s” or “d” toward or at the end of some words.

Pronouncing “r” as “l” in some words.

Pronouncing “t” as a soft sound between a “th” and a “d.” Although this voice has a Spanish (from Spain) cadence, you can hear the modified “t” sound in “Valentino” here.

Fun Dominican and Puerto Rican words and phrases:

“Coño” as a casual curse, typically used as an expression of frustration (like “fuck!”). My username is basically a really intense version of coño, and is a very Dominican phrase.

“Diablo,” which means “devil,” is also commonly used as an exclamation.

“Hijo de la gran puta,” a classic that roughly parallels "son of a bitch," but literally translates to “son of a great whore.”

“Papi” or “papi chulo” (“cute daddy”) as a term of affection. “Papito” is the diminutive version of this phrase.

On that note, you can add “ito” to the end of just about anything to make it a diminutive (cutesy/smaller version). “Chulo” means cute, for example. “Chulito” is the even more affectionate/smaller version of that.

“Dique,” which is used to express doubt. Vox might say, “I am not obsessed with Alastor!” Valentino might mutter “diiiique” in response. This is a Dominican thing.

“Wepa,” which is something usually shouted in excitement. This is a Puerto Rican thing.

“Vaina,” which kind of means “thing,” often with a negative connotation. So, Valentino might look at one of Velvette’s designs, find it hideous, and say, “que vaina más fea, oof” (“what an ugly thing, oof”).

“Fó,” which is sort of “ew” or “gross,” usually re: bad smells. You shout it.

“Mano,” short for “hermano” (“brother”). Used between friends.

“Dímelo” (“tell me”) as a greeting. Something that would be said when answering the phone, for example.

“Cojer” as a means of saying “to take,” like taking something from a table. This word has a very different context in other regions. In Mexico, for example, the verb “cojer” is vulgar and means “to fuck.”

“Ahorita,” which in my experience means “later.” In other regions, it can mean “right now” or “later” depending on context.

Commonly used phrases in Mexican Spanish.

You’ll want to avoid these if you’d like his dialogue to be consistently Caribbean-inspired:

“Pinche”

“Verga”

“Wey”

“No mames/no manches”

“Qué padre”

“Chingar”

Calling acquaintances “primo” or “jefe”

I mention this Spanish dialect specifically because it's the most common one in the world. And hey, Val could be canonically Mexican or Mexican in your headcanon! That's cool, too. I'm just providing insight for consistency's sake.

Other insight:

“Ay dios mío!” is a generally overused phrase, in my opinion, and not actually said IRL as frequently as TV makes it seem. Just my experience, though.

“Ay” or “uy” are good filler sounds. You hear Val shout it when Niffty snaps at him.

Valentino canonically squeaks like a moth when passionate!

His voice takes on an echo/growl when he’s particularly angry.

Mixing English and Spanish is tricky. Spanglish is not uncommon in PR, DR, and the US, but usually only when speaking with someone else who is fluent in both languages. Valentino seems plenty fluent in English; he uses lots of contractions, complex sentence structure, and slang. He doesn’t need to inject Spanish phrases in favor of English ones when conversing with another English speaker. He does do it sometimes for emphasis (“the devil’s princesa” or “this chiquita”).

As cliché as it is, defaulting to a Spanish phrase in moments of alarm, anger, frustration, or affection is also not uncommon if you grew up in a Spanish-speaking home. If someone surprises me, I shout “coño” by default, for example.

Valentino uses pet names when referring to others, like "amorcito" (“little love”) and "Angie" over voicemail.

Generally speaking, Val likes to stretch his vowels to be theatrical ("he mooooved!"). He sometimes eats the ends of English words, like “fuckin’” instead of “fucking.” He also sometimes rolls his “r” for English words, like in “ungrrrateful whore!”

Val's accent isn’t consistently strong, which could be a stylistic choice, or he could just be prone to a kind of unique code switching, for lack of a better term. My friends say I speak English with a Spanish accent when conversing with my family, for example (it’s not intentional).

Okay that’s it, bye!

#valentino #hazbin hotel #writing #staticmoth #voxval #Vox

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tubbytarchia · 4 months

Text

Actually I'm gonna need a little insanity thread for all the rancher things I love as I watch their POV for the first time. I'll publicize this when I'm done with ep5

TLDR: Heavens, it is a long list. I cannot tldr this

Them running around in circles, completely lost after their first deaths whilst also not expressing even the slightest bit of anger (esp Jimmy because you know)

Them expecting the other to know how to build but neither of them can

Tango building a box of a house and Jimmy being absolutely smitten by it continuously

Tango praising Jimmy with full genuinity for bringing back... a bucket of water

Them cradling one little chicken like its their offspring before they can get more

Jimmy standing behind the door, calling for Tango in order to surprise him with cows.... god help my heart

Tango declaring them as team ranchers to immediately admit he might not be a very good rancher. This is good and cute because I love to see them struggle yet have unbridled support towards each other

Jimmy being cornered by Joel and Etho so Tango leaves to save him (or so he says at least!)

Jimmy ushering Tango into their house as Tango yells for help due to his hunger and being chased by mobs, and then Jimmy giving him two melon slices because that's all he has (They are so pathetically poor which only accentuates the wholesome and cute factor)

Jimmy accidentally picking up Tango's baked potato and then handing it back to him so they can eat together while Tango basically foams out the mouth because he's so hungry

"Welcome home honey"

Them celebrating being able to feed themselves to any degree

Tango all "I built that wall, it's ugly, continuing the trend" only for Jimmy to immediately proclaim that he likes it

Jimmy catching on that Tango can be a great builder actually and confronting him about it like he's just been cheated on

Tango blocking their entrance to prevent more cows from leaving for Jimmy to then admit that he was the one that broke the door, oops

Tango watching Jimmy escort two goats from a distance "he's doing great"

Them in total confusion wasting way too much time trying to figure out how to get goat horns as they're huddled in their house with said goats strolling around (and them continuing to get butted casually as they go about their normal activities) before eventually choosing to waste much more time by trying to do the same thing outside

Unrelated but Pearl of all people being the first person to come to them with genuine help rather than to fuck with them like everyone else

In the face of all their struggles, the thing that seems to bring the absolute most joy to Tango and Jimmy by this point is obtaining a silly little goat horn

The fact that they both got the exact same goat horn!!!

"I need stuff for tools, and I need stuff for Jimmy"

Tango defending their base's looks despite proclaiming to be a bad builder, because god, I want him to be doing that just because of how much Jimmy praised it

Nobody replying to their goat horns, but THEM replying to each other!! (They also toot at each other later when frantically looking for each other agh!!)

This time Tango interrogating Jimmy as if he's been cheated on because Jimmy went into the deep dark without his approval

"The R survived"

"Tango snap out of it; Tango's having a moment" *Tango yelling and groaning and grunting and laughing continuously*

"Tango, Tango, let's think about this. Let's think about this!" "Hold me back" "Tango, listen to the horn" Jimmy calming his deranged husband aw

Tango burying his head in a corner refusing to look at his beautiful ranch in complete ruin even as Jimmy coaxes him

Jimmy and Tango kind of begrudgingly accepting Scar trying to be nice but Jimmy still valiantly defending the foot tower before it burned to the ground

Their son/daughter :( (Tango refers to the Warden as a she one episode and a he in another. Their child was an icon...)

Tango expressing that he's proud of Jimmy for having stayed alive so long and Jimmy replying "It's all down to to you. Hey, I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you"

Maybe Jimmy really didn't have a water bucket on him but it was so funny of him to casually turn to Tango whilst on fire and go "can you put me out?"

Jimmy being comically kidnapped??? (Actually being put into gay baby jail instead) And asking Tango to help save him

"You're still here? It's over. Go home. Go." (insert a bunch of crying emojis)

Other stuff: I think by virtue of Jimmy being a real tall guy, his character is usually depicted as taller than Tango's if not significantly so. As such... Tango calling Jimmy "little man" tickles me greatly and sounds like a very fond pet name

Briefly brought it up earlier but goddd. I will absolutely hc that Tango only became proud and defendant of his work because of how much Jimmy liked what he built. And Jimmy always being there and calming Tango in his crazed outbursts <3 Tango is such a goddamn creature isn't he

And the uhh... Tango dying quickest out of anyone because of a creeper, to then express that he was proud of Jimmy for doing well even though he got them killed the first time around, and then Jimmy unceremoniously dying to an Enderman to end their series for good... As funny and poetic as it is, god, the canary curse fuckin hurts!! And yet there were hardly times that Tango showed disdain towards Jimmy, and then never genuinely. He knew their series could end quick with Jimmy as his soulmate and even when their positivity faltered, their support towards one another never did

For having read all this (or maybe just glancing and scrolling)... some unfinished rancher doodles just for you that I made while watching their POV

#team rancher #rancher duo #I am not okay #trafficshipping #blabber

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katherines-imagines · 1 year

Text

“Don’t be a skxawng, just ask her.” Part 2

pairings: neteyam x reader

warnings: cute, fluff, bad writing

key: skxawng - moron, muntxa - mate, yawne - dear/my love

summary: Neteyam tries to talk to Y/n, but the awkward teenagers don’t communicate well.

After talking with his parents, Neteyam was determined to finally ask the girl he loved to be his mate.

As Neteyam searched for her, he daydreamed about what it would be like to have her as his mate.

Obviously the same, Neteyam thought to himself. I suppose some kissing.

Neteyam stopped in his tracks at this revelation.

He would get to kiss her.

His tail, out of his control, started wagging, thumping the floor in delight.

When he had caught himself in the act, he quickly collected his thoughts and continued walking.

When he finally spotting the girl he was searching for, his heart stopped.

She was petting the Ikran who were being fed, grinning happily.

Neteyam could feel his breath quicken, looking at the beauty he hoped to call his lover one day.

Said girl snapped him out of his thoughts when she had noticed and called him over.

Clearing his throat, he walked over to the girl, hoping to seem confident.

Sadly, his walk seemed as though he was limping, so when he was in front of the girl, she immediately grabbed him and started looking for any wounds.

Confused, Neteyam asked, “What are you doing?”

Missing the blush on his face, she simply answered, “Looking for a wound.”

“What wound,” he asked in a small voice, the lack of space between the two flustering hun.

“You’re limping, are you not?” The girl finally looked up from her search.

Blushing, though this time in embarrassment, Neteyam cleared his voice to explain.

“No, no, I am not limping. Sorry.”

Y/n looked at him in confusion, but laughed it off, slowly turning back to pet the Ikran.

“So, what are you doing here,” she asks, sliding her hands down the Ikran’s wings.

“I have something to ask you,” Neteyam says with uncertainty.

“Yes,” Y/n answers, her eyes remaining on the Ikran’s.

“Y/n, I need you to look at me when I ask you, it is important.”

Concerned, Y/n turns, pausing her actions of petting the Ikran to look at the boy.

The girl places her hand on his forearm, worried eyes catching it gaze.

“What is it ‘Teyam?”

Flustered, Neteyam looks down, not prepared to get Y/n’s full attention.

“It, it is not bad,” Neteyam tries fo start out before he hears the girls sigh of relief.

He softly smiles to himself, tail slightly and subtly thumping as he hears the girls concern for him.

Waiting for Neteyam fo continue, Y/n slides her arm from his forearm to his hand, softly rubbing her thumb against his rough, calloused hand.

Neteyam, finally having the guts to look up, stares straight into her eyes, making the teenage girl gulp.

“You know you are so kind ma Y/n.”

Y/n blushes and looks down, while Neteyam smirks, glad that this time it was not he who was flustered, but her.

“I- I really am not,” she tries to protest, but Neteyam shuts her down as fast as she had begun.

“No, you are, and do not tell me you are not. If anyone tells you that you are not, they are idiots. Blind, ugly, jealous skxawng‘s who can never compare to you.”

As Neteyam continued his rant, Y/n stared up at him and blushed.

She blushed hard.

Hearing the talented, generous, kind son known as the son of Toruk Makto speak in such admiration had her flustered and her heart was beating harder than it already was when she saw him walk towards her.

When Neteyam finally noticed her staring at him, he paused, flushing as he stared down.

The two awkward teenagers looked at the ground, feelings swirling all around the two, just bursting to come out.

Before either could get a word in, there was a call for the girl to head home.

Sadly, the girl turned to the boy who’s face had fallen at the call.

“I am sorry ma ‘Teyam, I must return home,” she whispered sadly.

Frustrated, yet understanding, he answered, “S’okay, I should probably be heading back as well.”

While both has agree they had to go, they stayed right where they were, before Y/n had taken a small step forward.

Y/n quickly went on her tiptoes and gave him a quick peck on his cheek.

“I am sorry you could not ask what you wanted to, but tomorrow you can,” she shyly said glancing up at him.

Blushing harshly, he looked down at her and gave a big grin.

“Of course, yawne.”

The girl blushed at the term of endearment, and began walking backwards to leave.

“W-well, I should go now,” she said, quickly turning only to be hit by a tree.

Neteyam gasped and took a step forward to help her, when she shot up and called out, “I’m fine, bye now,” and scrambled away.

The boy couldn’t help but chuckle at the clumsy girl, and gazed longingly at the girls retreating figure with love.

He would tell her, hopefully tomorrow. Till then, he would wait.

For as long as he had to.

———————————————————————

Bonus:

When Neteyam had returned to his families tent, his mother and father were looking at him expectantly.

“So? Did you ask her,” his father asked.

“Not yet, but I will tomorrow,” Neteyam quietly answered.

Both parents let out a hiss of frustration. How could their son be so damn stupid?

“This is your fault,” Neytiri yelled at her husband.

“Mine? It’s not my fault the kids a stupid skxawng. In fact, I told him specifically: ‘Don’t be a skxawng, just ask her.’ How hard is it to interpret that?”

Neytiri groaned in frustration, turning to her son.

“You better ask the girl tomorrow or else,” Neytiri threatened.

Neteyam gulped and nodded, headed towards his sleeping area to try and come up with a plan.

As he walked away, Lo’ak entered the tent snickering with Kiri.

“Did you see them? God he couldn’t man up and just ask her,” Lo’ak laughed.

Kiri went to her older brother’s defense.

“He tried, he can’t help that he’s a skxawng.”

Lo’ak continued to laugh as Kiri mumbled under her breath about how Neteyam will eventually man up.

Neteyam, from his bed, heard Kiri’s and Lo’ak’s conversation and groaned to himself.

Now he couldn’t back out, he had to ask Y/n.

Tomorrow.

———————————————————————

A/N: Oh my gosh thank you guys so much for the love on the first part!! People asked for a Part 2, so here it is! If you want to be tagged on the 3rd part, just comment.

Thank’s so much again 🫶

asked to be tagged: @mommyneytiri @marcswife21

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inoreuct · 4 months

Text

horse girl zoro/prince sanji au that @redgitanako and i talked about way back when because it suddenly crossed my mind OKAY HERE WE GO

zoro’s a travelling bounty hunter with three horses. yes, three. don’t tell kitetsu and enma but wado’s his favourite

wado was kuina’s horse; when kuina died she was so sad because she didn’t get why kuina was gone and for a while zoro had to emotionally support a horse AND himself, but horses are smart creatures. wado understood by herself after a while. they don’t really talk about it.

on that note, zoro talks to his horses. people look at him like he’s a few crayons short of the whole pack but they don’t say anything because he looks scary as hell; built like a brick wall, one eye gone, gnarly scar across his chest and all

(they’ll never know that he’s having an argument with enma about buying supplies where one party is contributing in possibly-misinterpreted horse looks. the crayons aren’t missing— but it’s admittedly a little hard to prove they’re there, zoro, we can’t keep defending you like this)

sanji's the third prince of the kingdom that hires him; sora’s the queen, and his siblings are all decent other than regular sibling assholery. judge is on the run and they’ve made the collective decision that they want his head on a stick.

zoro expects sanji to be a stuck-up priss because he LOOKS like a stuck-up priss— look at his perfect hair. his clothes. his heeled boots and his stupid curly eyebrows

but NO. well, yes, sanji IS a little bit of a stuck-up priss but also, he’s good with horses?? wado takes to him like a DREAM and zoro's flabbergasted because anybody who has ever tried to coddle her other than zoro or kuina has gotten kicked in the head, but sanji's petting at her neck and cooing at her in baby-talk and she's licking sugar cubes and apple slices out of his palm. zoro feels so betrayed.

like of COURSE his horse had to take a liking to the boy he hates OF ALL PEOPLE.

(zoro. at this moment the horse is smarter than you. listen to her.)

reiju’s the princess here, but sanji’s the one who got all the magic-esque affinities. animals LOVE him. he would be a literal disney princess if not for the fact that he doesn’t love them back

like SQUIRREL. WHY ARE YOU SHITTING ALL OVER MY YARD. GO AWAY. WHY IS A DOG TRYING TO LICK MY HAIR. WHYYY IS THIS BIRD BRINGING ME STICKS ALL THE TIME. he’s trying to fall asleep. he hears a TSKTSKTSKTSKTSKTSKTSK. he sits up and gets right out of bed and starts yelling at the lizard on the ceiling.

he does have a pretty mare called maple, though! (and zoro can’t help but love her too; it’s a sign that the mosshead doesn’t clock until much, much later)

and then zoro comes into his life with his three horses and sanji yanks him in by the collar like "listen up, swordsman. i do not CARE how sweet your horses are. i do not CARE how— how— WHATEVER you are. if you stink up my stable i will make you sleep in it, are we clear?" and zoro just nods because he’s having a bit of a gay crisis

sanji is 1. pretty 2. entirely able to hold his own and 3. Wado Approved™ and zoro does NOT know how to deal. at all. he’s holding onto wado’s reins for dear life. he wonders if the same ultimatum would apply if he swapped out the word stable for bed and immediately wants to dunk himself into the horse trough.

meanwhile sanji isn’t spared at all. sora sits on her throne, one eyebrow raised as her son goes on and on about how "mother i hate the swordsman you hired. he's green. and ugly. like a troll. like an OGRE. his hands are too big. his boots are too shiny. his earrings are cute but only because i want them. his EVERYTHING smells like horse. he might as well be a horse with how strong he is, did you know how many hay bales he carried at once??" and she’s just like,,, "honey are you sure this is hate"

she certainly wouldn’t mind them being together. zoro is rough around the edges and does smell a bit like horse, admittedly, but he was clearly raised right— he’s respectful in his own gruff way and he does things with immense care. sora’s noticed. she knows her son well enough to know that he’s noticed, too.

one day sanji bumps into zoro on his way out of the baths and wow. okay. so he doesn’t smell like horse ALL the time and oh his hair is damp and there's a towel around his waist and he is very, very shirtless and sanji turns around in a panic and walks face-first into a pillar.

he watches zoro care for his horses, carefully brushing through their manes and coats as he speaks to them softly, and alright. maybe this guy isn’t all bad. animals, sanji has noticed, are brilliant judges of character; horses especially can be testy and temperamental, and they don’t hesitate to kick anybody they don’t like.

zoro’s horses love him, and it’s obvious. maple looks forward to the snacks he slips her when he thinks that nobody’s looking. that says a lot more about his character than anything else.

after a few days zoro has a solid plan down and sets out to find judge, and suddenly the stables are empty. sanji finds himself going out with maple more and more, exploring the woods around their forest to pass the time because he needs something to keep his mind occupied and there’s only so much he can cook. judge might be a piece of shit, but he’s also an evil genius, and sanji refuses to admit he’s worried even though he is.

and then zoro comes back with judge’s war helmet wrapped in a cloth, gore dripping off the bottom edge as he sets it at sora’s feet.

he’s a little banged up, tired as hell with a couple of scratches here and there— nothing serious, but sanji still drags him to the infirmary and cleans him up perhaps a little more emotionally than either of them had expected

he passes out for a good few days afterwards but sora invites him to stay for a little longer, a time frame that nobody specifies. zoro just kind of… doesn’t leave. it’s strange for him; he’s wandered, always. he gets antsy staying in one place for too long, but this blond prince that is strangely kind and gives back as good as he gets is really something else.

the days pass. they race and bicker and soon enough, all three of zoro’s horses have brass name plaques tacked above what are now their stalls. he had a room in the palace and a place at the dinner table. sanji’s hair has grown long, now, and neither of them talk about the way that zoro’s stay has become something that feels more permanent—

until zoro finally finds the balls to give sanji one of his earrings as a courting gift. it’s the first one of many, but at that moment sanji just looks at it wide-eyed and zoro starts to shrink back all like "if you. don't want it that's alright. i'll get you something new, something else—" because look, he knows he’s not much. he has money, but not enough to give sanji something really nice. not enough to get something that’s more impressive than all the jewels and gold that the prince could have at a whim. he’s a bounty hunter that came from dirt and this earring is the most precious thing he has to offer, but he understands if—

sanji kisses him. yells something borderline incoherent along the lines of about fucking time as he shakes zoro by the shoulders, but he’s smiling very brightly and he’s very beautiful and zoro has a feeling they're going to be just fine.

(sora and the siblings breathe a collective sigh of relief, because the pining looks and dejected sighing were really getting a little ridiculous.)

(they speak too soon. after they get together it somehow gets WORSE.)

this was a ride… (get it. get it.) okay i’ll stop HOPE YOU ENJOYED HEH i know a lot of places are having a flu season/covid wave going around rn so make sure to hydrate and eat well!! muaks 😽

#i have REALLY got to stop sleeping at 4am #horse girl zoro au #zosan #roronoa zoro #black leg sanji #zoro x sanji #one piece #sanji #one piece zosan #one piece sanji #one piece zoro #zoro

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starphires · 9 months

Text

STAY AT HOME WIFE.

୨୧ PARING. girlfriend! ellie williams x gn! reader

୨୧ SUMMARY. a work break spent texting with your girlfriend has her persuading you to quit your job.

୨୧ WARNINGS. fluff, established relationship, talk of shitty customers, ellie being silly and impractical, joel is alive!

୨୧ AUTHOR'S NOTE. people loved the abby text au, so i thought to make one for the one and only ellie bellie :b

masterlist. | tlou masterlist.

you

pookie smellie 👎 message

i'm on my break!

smellie

i'm on my break! FINALLY!

pookie yknow i hate that nickname you 👎 message

you

sure you do

smellie

i was just abt to tell u our son misses you you ? message

you

you just did silly smellie 👎 message

smellie

forget it...

how's work so far???

you

wait :(

tell uno that i miss him!!!!!

smellie

so the cat gets an i miss you message and not your beloved girlfriend?

you

yeah... basically smellie 👎 message

but you said you didn't like my nickname for you ☹️

i think it's super cute! you're my pookie bear!!

smellie

the bear part is kinda cute

you

all of it is cute

smellie

alr

all of it is cute

you

smellie

so?

you

what did my son say? smellie 👎 message

smellie

you're joking

you

am not

smellie

he's OUR son

and he did a little screech when i told him you loved message

you

he's OUR son nu uh you're the father that step up that's all smellie ! message

smellie

nu uh you're the father that step up that's all but i'm the best father there is 😌

you

you really are

i miss you baby smellie loved message

wish my lips could stretch so i could give you a kiss from anywhere smellie loved photo & message

smellie

you're really cute you loved message

now tell me abt work babe

you

horrible smellie 👎 message

i'm telling you, never ever work in retail

smellie

wasn't planning on it you haha message

you

i mean it!

bc tell me why i was minding my own business walking around the store asking if anyone needed help nd a woman stops me to hand me shirt so i could refold it-

smellie

KNOCK THE BITCH OUT

you

i was beyond baffled

like hello? i get i'm a worker but i wasn't even folding clothes :( smellie 👎 message

smellie

babe i would've rocked her shit so hard n then make her fold that shirt herself you haha message

serves the ugly right

you

you really shouldn't work in retail omg you'd get fired so quick

and probably banned smellie haha message

serves the ugly right she was actually really pretty so it made it worse

smellie

she was actually really pretty so it made it worse she pulled that shit with you so that automatically makes her ugly in my book!

you should honestly just quit you ? message

you

what would i do all day :(

smellie

be cute n silly n beautiful like usual

you could be a stay at home wife

my cute little house wife you loved message

you

as much as i would love that...

in this economy?

smellie

don't worry babe

i'll take care of you

you

while working for joel?

smellie

the old man gotta retire someday then i'm gonna take over for him

then i'll get you that wrap around porch house you wanted you loved message

you

or you could build it :D smellie loved message

smellie

i'd build anything for my house wife you loved message

you

n that's why i'm bring you home some tea with popping pearls from the food court smellie ! message

smellie

thank you wifeyy you loved message

reblogs & feedback is appreciated (^ｰ^)

#starphireswrites.#hoping i did service to ellie's character!#this was so silly to write but it's just so ellie to tell her gf to become a house wife!!!!!#literally a headcanon of mine that ellie is handy and wouldn't totally worked with joel in modern times!#she's also a tea with popping pearls lover i don't make the rules!#ellie williams #ellie williams x reader #ellie williams fluff #the last of us #the last of us fluff #tlou x reader

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thehighladywrites · 5 months

Text

Azzie, I think your mom is super hot…

⋆⭒˚｡‎♡‧₊˚ Pairing: Azriel x reader, Rhysand makes a cameo, Cassian is mentioned, and Azriel’s milfy mom is the star of the show

⋆⭒˚｡‎♡‧₊˚ Summary: Azriel introduces reader to his mother for the first time during Solstice. She develops a tiny crush on his mother and he finds the whole thing funny. Rhysand reminisces about the time he and Cassian called Azriel’s mom a milf and got their asses kicked. fluff, crack, so cute, az mom is just- wow…

⋆⭒˚｡‎♡‧₊˚ Author’s note: Listen, I wrote this in the span of about an hour so it’s not really a masterpiece but I still love it. Also this is so relatable bc Azriel is canonically beautiful, like drop dead gorgeous and we all know he didn’t get it from his ugly ass father, so I headcanon that his mom is identical to him, resulting in readers innocent crush on her.

Azriel looked at you with disbelief as he closed his dropped jaw. “ You have a crush on who now?”

Nervous laughter escaped you as you averted your gaze. Azriel had disclosed that his mother was alive, when he caught onto your habit of referring to her in the past tense. Unbeknownst to others, she was alive, with only Cassian and Rhysand knowing. After Azriel spilled that he usually spends Solstice with her, Sorine, his mom, went all out, cooking up a feast when she learned he was bringing his mate over for the first time. The moment you met her, you were totally floored, and your face lit up like a festive candle.

She was a carbon-copy of your mate and they were equally beautiful. It was like looking at a female version of Azriel. Her looks paired with her kindness and caring nature made you develop a tiny crush on her.

"Well, look who Azriel brought to brighten our home! Come here, both of you. I've been eager to meet the one who's captured my son's heart."

Smiling, you and Azriel exchanged glances before approaching her. "Thank you for having us. I've heard so much about you. It's truly an honor to be here." Azriel softened by a hint of a smile, added "Mother, It's about time you met the person responsible for bringing some light into my life."

Azriel's mother, Sorine, observed you for a moment, a twinkle in her eyes. "My, Azriel, you didn't mention just how beautiful your mate is. You've got a good eye."

You, feeling a bit bashful, stammered out a heartfelt thank you, your cheeks warming. And it certainly didn’t help when she gave you a hug, her scent reminding you of your mate. Azriel, standing beside you, couldn't help but chuckle at your adorable blush, whispering, "Told you so," as his mother's compliment lingered in the air.

Presenting her with the basket of treats and gifts, you eagerly explained each item when she asked. " Heavens, thank you so much, sweetie. What a thoughtful gift," she exclaimed, kissing your cheek and flashing you Azriel’s infamous smile. Heat prickled your face, you averted your eyes, replying, "Oh, no problems, Ms. Sorine." Her heartfelt laugh filled the room, and she insisted you called her Sorine when you returned to the dinner table to start the meal.

Azriel noticed you squirming at dinner, not being able to fully look in Sorine’s eyes. Curiosity peaked in him, resulting in him pulling you aside when she went to prepare dessert. He gripped your chin and waited nervously for you to answer while a million thoughts ran through his head.

Was it too early to meet her? Did you like his mother? Why did you not keep eye contact with her? Was this a mistake?

All of his unease dissipated when you confessed to him about your unexpected, lighthearted crush on his mother.

“It’s embarrassing because I don’t want her to think i’m weird but I kinda have a teensy, tiny crush on your mother. Look, it’s no big deal but she is so beautiful and hot and I can’t help it. She’s so kind to me and I love her so much. And no wonder you’re a stunner, you totally stole your looks from your her.”

Azriel couldn't help but burst into laughter at your confession. Seeing the humor in your silly crush, he reassured you with a warm smile, "Don't worry, love. It's adorable, and I'm flattered. My mom will probably find it amusing too. Nothing to be embarrassed about."

Amused, Azriel gently cupped your face, his eyes filled with affection. "Besides," he continued, "it's endearing that you're so genuine. My mom will love you for who you are, crushes and all." He leaned in for a tender kiss, trying to ease any lingering unease. "Just be yourself because she started loving you the moment I mentioned you. She also threatened to do not so nice things to me if I ever hurt you."

A sigh of relief mixed with joy escaped you as Azriel's mother walked in, bearing a tray of delightful desserts. The atmosphere lightened, and you gradually let go of any remaining awkwardness. Engaging in conversation, you found a genuine connection with your mate's lovely mother.

As she shared stories, advice, and warmth, you felt a growing appreciation for the woman who had played a significant role in Azriel's life. Her care and protective instincts became evident, and you couldn't help but hold her in high regard for what she and Azriel went through. This shared moment cemented a bond that went beyond the initial nerves, leaving you grateful for the wisdom and love she gave.

As the evening wound down, and the shared laughter and stories reached their natural end, you exchanged heartfelt goodbyes. Standing, you gave Azriel's mother a warm hug, expressing gratitude for her hospitality and wisdom. She reciprocated with a genuine smile, her eyes reflecting the warmth of her soul.

Azriel, too, embraced his mother, a silent acknowledgment passing between them. The love and protection woven into their connection were palpable. Together, you left, hand in hand, carrying the echoes of a memorable evening filled with laughter, reassurance, and the comforting embrace of family.

The door closed behind you, leaving the night to cradle the shared moments as you ventured back to your own home, hearts full and spirits lifted.

————-—————-————-

In the days following the dinner with Azriel's mother, you found a moment to catch up with Rhysand. Curiosity tugged at you, and you couldn't resist addressing the unspoken aspect of the evening.

"Rhysie," you began, a playful glint in your eye, "I couldn't help but notice you didn't mention anything about Azriel's mother's beauty. I mean, come on, it's like a family trait."

Rhysand chuckled, a mischievous smile playing on his lips. "Well, dear Y/n, I've learned that when it comes to Azriel's mother, some things are better left unsaid. Besides, beauty, as they say, is in the eye of the beholder."

You rolled your eyes, sensing there was more to his response since he always gave a weird poetic expression whenever he was trying to deflect. "Spill, Rhys. I know there's a story there."

With a theatrical sigh, Rhysand leaned in, lowering his voice conspiratorially. "Let's just say Azriel has a well-deserved reputation for being quite protective. I may have complimented his mother once, long ago, and let's just say he made it clear that some subjects are off-limits. Actually, me and Cassian called her a milf and he beat us up.”

You burst into laughter, imagining the stoic Azriel fiercely defending his mother's honor.

"That sounds about right, atleast I know what not to call her.”

Rhysand winked, "Smart move. Now, any more family secrets you want to find out about, or shall we leave the mystery intact?"

With a smile, you decided to leave the mystery for another day, content with the warm meeting with his mother.

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naughtyneganjdm · 6 months

Text

The Perfect Costume

Summary: Negan goes to a Halloween store with his family in search of costumes to wear.

Characters: Negan & the reader (OC, second person)

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/50991043

Warnings: 18+, Swearing, a little smut (not very detailed), dirty minded Negan, etc

Notes: This is meant to be a sweet little fic with Negan being naughty in the way he talks and the smut is very miniscule and not very detailed. Just a short little Halloween fic. Enjoy!

“Any idea what kind of costume you have in mind kiddo?” Negan questioned following around your five-year-old daughter while she ran down the aisles of the Halloween store you were in. Negan had your eight-month-old son Noah strapped to his chest in a baby carrier while he held onto your hand. “Emma? Baby girl. Are we looking for something that is cute? Scary? Some kind of animal? We’re running on nothing here baby.”

“I don’t know daddy,” Emma exclaimed, stopping in her tracks to look back at Negan with a frown. Tossing her hands up, her dimples sank in looking around the aisle. “There is so much here! When I see it, I just know I’ll know that’s it!”

“Remember we’re looking for all of our costumes baby girl,” you reminded your daughter knowing that she had begged both you and Negan to pick everyone’s costume this year. “So you have four costumes to pick out.”

“I know, I know,” Emma blew off the responsibility of it all causing Negan to snort since she was so lost inside of the store that she really didn’t have a care in the world what either one of you were saying. “Finding a good Halloween costume is…really…really important. It can determine how much candy I get this year. Y’know?”

“Solid point baby girl,” Negan snorted, his fingers tightening around yours while you continued to follow your daughter around the Halloween store. It was like she was lost in a toy store and she was amazed with everything often stopping when she saw something that she thought was cool.

“Daddy!” she seemed in awe of something while she stepped before it. It was a monster mask that when you pushed a button, it looked like it oozed blood. An amused bout of laughter fell from her throat when she threw her head back to look at Negan. “It’s so ugly! I love it!”

It made both of you laugh, but her awe didn’t last long before she was running off to go look at something else that caught her eyes, “The interest lasted ten seconds before she’s off.”

“She is my daughter. She can’t focus on just one thing,” Negan snickered at the thought trying to keep up with Emma while she looked over everything. “I will take credit for all this pent-up energy. I have a hard time focusing too.”

“You? No,” you teased Negan, hitting him on his shoulder playfully. “You aren’t like that at all.”

“I notice the sarcasm in your tone,” Negan chuckled, his head lowering down with his lips hovering in over yours. Bringing your lips together in a lingering kiss, you heard the disgusted breath falling from your daughter. Pulling away slightly, you saw her staring up at the two of you with her hands on her hips. It made Negan let out a big belly laugh, his nose nuzzling in against the side of your neck with the anger that she was sharing for the two of you kissing. “I feel like a young boy getting scolded by my parents.”

“What did I tell the two of you about kissing?” Emma folded her arms out in front of her chest in attempts to lecture you. “Dial it back on the kissing. It’s gross.”

“It’s my way of telling your mother that I love her kiddo,” Negan pressed a faint kiss over the side of your cheek before kneeling down, hooking his arm around Noah who let out a small squeal when they were eye level with Emma. “Kisses aren’t a bad thing.”

“The last time the two of you got super kissy, I ended up with a little brother,” Emma blurt out causing Negan to choke and then laugh. Looking up at you with his big hazel eyes, Negan couldn’t help but smile and nod his head. “And while I love Noah, we don’t need another baby in the family. Not now at least. He cries a lot during the middle of the night.”

“That’s because he’s a baby sweetheart,” you reminded your daughter, stepping forward to place your hand in over your daughter’s shoulder in a tender squeeze. “Babies do that.”

“Imagine two babies doing that,” Emma circled her finger around Noah and his big eyes followed the movements of his sister’s finger from where he was strapped to Negan’s chest. “Noah is cute. And I like how he smiles, but the crying? No thank you!”

“You know, you used to cry too sweet pea,” Negan reached out to pull Emma in closer to him, careful enough to keep Noah safe while he peppered kisses over your daughter’s face. At first, she tried to hold it in, but the more Negan kissed at her face she couldn’t help but giggle. Her small hands placed in over the sides of Negan’s face and he laughed along with her.

“Your beard is itchy,” she tipped up on her toes to press a kiss over the side of Negan’s cheek. “I love you daddy, it’s just embarrassing how much you and mommy kiss. At home, okay. But in public, you need to cool it.”

“Got it,” Negan’s nose wrinkled and he gazed up at you again from where you were standing beside them. “We’ll work on it.”

“No you won’t,” Emma sighed gazing between both of you. Throwing her hands up in the air, she dramatically shook her head and shrugged. “I’m just gonna have to get used to babies. So many babies.”

“Emma,” you laughed watching your daughter turn on her heel after she gave Noah a quick kiss on his head.

“I’m okay with lots of babies,” Negan pointed out, letting out a grunt when he got up from his knees. Glancing back at him, you heard Negan laugh and shrug his shoulders. “I like being a dad. And I like what we have to do in order to make babies.”

“What does that mean?” Emma stopped in her tracks making your face flush over with a warmth when you reached for Emma’s hand.

“Nothing,” you immediately answered for Negan hearing his amused chuckle from behind you. “Now let’s find us some good costumes here.”

“Yeah. Maybe we should talk about what we are going to want for daddy’s costume. Maybe a vampire. I’ve got the looks and the charm for a vampire,” Negan suggested trying to keep up with the two of you while you looked through the aisles again. “Or maybe I can be like a zombie baseball player. Or like a wizard or something.”

“A wizard?” Emma stopped walking to look back at Negan. “What’s cool about a wizard?”

“I don’t know, they do magic and what not,” Negan looked to some of the costumes that were hanging.

“You’re not magical,” Emma heard Negan snort and he turned to look back at his daughter. “You’ve never been interested in magic tricks.”

“That’s not true,” Negan held his finger up in the air, his dimples sinking in when he let out a long exhale. “You should see the magic trick I can do when it comes to your mother’s pants.”

“Knock it off,” you groaned out, rolling your eyes noticing the mischievous sound that followed.

“What does he mean?” Emma looked up at you with big eyes and you shook your head. “Mom?”

“He’s just being silly,” you responded to your daughter who turned away and you let out a yelp when Negan moved in behind you to pinch your bottom. Emma stopped, giving you a strange expression with the sound you made. “Sorry honey.”

“I think it’s pretty magical how fast I can get your pants off,” Negan whispered in your ear and you rolled your eyes, pushing your hand into Negan’s shoulder to put some distance between the two of you. “I could be a killer clown. I think I’m pretty funny.”

“No,” Emma slurred out her words causing Negan to huff out loud. Emma was denying all the suggestions that Negan was throwing out for his personal costume and you found it amusing how she was ignoring her father’s ideas.

“How about this one for you mama?” Negan called out pulling a costume out that was very skimpy with devil horns on it. “Or, if you don’t like that one…”

Negan pulled out something similar and held it up to show that it was an angel costume, “This one is just as nice and we can use it after the kids go to sleep.”

“That looks cold,” Emma noted after you gave your husband a glare. “It’s going to be cold at night daddy. She doesn’t want something like that.”

“I was just thinking for after we go trick or treating,” Negan gazed between the two before setting the angel costume down and grabbing the devil one. “I think I’ll get this. Just in case.”

“You’re weird,” Emma commented, squeezing her fingers tighter around yours and it made you snicker. “Why would you want to wear a costume when you’re not trick or treating?”

“He’s just being goofy like daddy often is,” you gave Negan a glance and he tipped his head to the side. “Has anything caught your eye yet honey?”

“So many things! That’s the problem,” Emma exclaimed gazing around at everything in frustration. “I love it all.”

“Well you are going to have multiple Halloweens after this honey,” you suggested hearing Noah coo out and you looked back to see that he was curling his fingers around Negan’s index finger holding tightly to it. “I think your little brother is hungry.”

“He will eat soon, we just have to figure this out,” Emma insisted tugging firmly on your hand to pull you toward a section of the store where she had seemed to have the most interest.

“I found two things that I think you should get for me,” Negan’s voice drew your attention when he returned with trophies in his hands. Holding them out to you, you accepted one to see that it said biggest cock on the block and then reached for the other to see that it said pussy eating champion on it. You choked back on your laughter trying not to draw attention to the items that he had grabbed. You were thankful your kids were too small to understand these things at this point. “They fit, right?”

“Did you go out in search of the naughty section of the store?” you shook your head in disbelief hearing his amused laughter follow. “You need to chill.”

“I don’t understand, why would you want to eat cats?” Emma’s voice beckoned the both of you and you saw that she was standing up on her toes to read the trophies that Negan had grabbed. “Daddy, you’re allergic to cats. Your eyes would puff up and that’s just gross. Who eats cats?”

The immediate laughter that followed from Negan when you noticed two other parents staring out at you in disbelief made your face hot with embarrassment but you couldn’t help but laugh too at the situation. Both from your daughter’s innocence and the situations Negan always put you in.

“You’re a dick,” you breathed out under your breath knowing that by the wickedness of Negan’s laughter that he was proud of himself.

“Why is no one answering me?” Emma seemed frustrated, but Negan walked off to go return the trophies. “Why would he want to eat cats?”

“He doesn’t want to eat cats baby,” you assured your daughter with a sigh noticing that Negan was in quite a spunky mood today. “Let’s find those costumes.”

“You both are weird today,” Emma noted and you didn’t disagree with her there. When Emma found something, you saw her eyes light up at the sight of it. “Mommy! I’ve got it! This can be daddy’s costume!”

When Negan returned, he was singing one of the Halloween songs to Noah that was clearly on his mind.

“Your daughter found you something,” you pointed to the outfit that Emma had found for Negan and he looked up letting out a long, lingering groan. “This is yours.”

“Oh come on,” Negan grumbled seeing Emma look back at him at excitement.

“Isn’t it great daddy?” Emma held the costume out and Negan looked to you, his dimples sucking in when he breathed loudly.

“Yeah, honey, it’s just great,” Negan sighed, feigning a smile knowing that he would do anything for his daughter. “I can’t wait to try it on.”

---

“Daddy this is so freaking cool!” Emma boasted running down the driveway from the home she had just trick or treated at with you. The ears from her Tigger costume bounced when she went to give Negan a hug, slamming into him with excitement. “I told you the right costume would get me all the best candy. That woman gave me full sized candy bars,” she pulled back to reveal the candy that was in her bag. “You should go up with me next time so maybe we can get more.”

“I’m super happy for you kiddo,” Negan reached down to pick up Emma while you carried Noah. “You know, I get why you made your little brother Piglet, but is there a reason you let your mama be a pretty witch and I had to be Winnie the Pooh?”

Involuntarily a laugh fell from your throat when you looked to Negan and the costume he was wearing. It was an oversized the Winnie the Pooh costume and you could see his face flushing over with red when a few kids from the school he worked at walked by.

“You always call mommy honey, so I just thought it fit daddy!” Emma exclaimed, clinging tightly to Negan while he made it to the next house. “You tell me I’m bouncing off the walls all the time. So I make the best Tigger. Noah is always hungry and he’s small. So Piglet makes sense y’know?”

“And mama gets to be a pretty witch? Why wasn’t she Eeyore instead?” Negan wondered looking to you knowing that you found amusement in all of this.

“Because mommy isn’t sad like that. She’s pretty and I think witches are cool!” Emma explained with a tiny laugh when she wiggled out of Negan’s arms to reach for his hand to eagerly lead him up toward the door and you followed not far behind with Noah. Once you finished up at that house, when you got to the bottom of the driveway Emma hugged Negan again causing another groan to fall from his throat. “Come on guys.”

“You know, I love her hugs,” Negan began as you followed Emma on the sidewalk as she continued to skip to the next house, “but I can’t wait until she gets a little bit taller. Every single time she runs and hugs me, she headbutts me right in the nuts.”

“Negan,” you couldn’t help but laughed watching him reach down with his big Winnie the Pooh paw to try to adjust himself in a way that wouldn’t draw attention to it, but it looked pretty ridiculous.

“I’m not kidding. I’ve been headbutted in the nuts about fifty times today alone,” Negan informed you with a tiny rumble of a laugh. “And that shit hurts. Even being in a padded chubby bear costume.”

“Come on daddy!” Emma called out reaching for Negan who eagerly stumbled up the driveway with his daughter. Emma was so excited and Noah was really just enjoying the lights and all the costumes, letting out small laughs from where he was strapped to your chest in his baby carrier.

Negan urged Emma to keep going until the very end of trick or treating and by the time you had gotten home, Negan had grabbed Noah and went to the kitchen table to help sort through the candy that they had gotten. You couldn’t help but be in awe of your husband seeing him sitting at the kitchen table with both your son and daughter sitting on his lap still dressed in his Winnie the Pooh costume. The amount of pictures you took tonight were ridiculous, but you couldn’t help how cute you found everything.

At the end of the night, Negan had fallen asleep on the couch still in his costume with both Emma and Noah on his chest after watching movies together. You had taken your costume off and you were cleaning up things, but you couldn’t help but be in awe of the way your husband was with your children. As silly or ridiculous as he was, Negan always showed up when it came to being a dad. He made things fun for your children and he showed them endless amounts of love.

The sound of movement drew your attention seeing the way that Negan carefully moved off the couch to carry both a sleeping Emma over his shoulder and Noah in his other arm, “You need some help there Pooh?”

“I’ve got this,” Negan assured you and you followed him up the stairs of your home to the second floor. Watching Negan put your children to bed helped you to realize how much you truly loved your husband. He was a great father and there was no question that was the sexiest thing about him. After he peppered Emma with kisses, Negan followed you back out into the hallway and threw his hands up in the air. “I need to get this costume off.”

“Let me help you,” you reached for his hand, laughing when the paw accepted your grasp. Leading him to the bedroom, you closed the door and moved around Negan to undo the zipper at the back of the costume. Negan pushed down the head of the costume and grunted when he tugged his arms out of the material. “You know, I thought you were pretty hot when I first met you. Wearing that leather jacket looking like a bad ass.”

“Yeah?” Negan’s eyebrow arched in curiosity, sitting down on the edge of the bed. His hair was wet from being sweaty while he worked to get the legs of the costume off. When he was done, he tossed the costume aside and was sitting before you in a white t-shirt and black athletic pants that he had worn underneath the costume.

“But nothing tops how sexy I found you tonight,” you informed him, moving forward to curl your finger in underneath his chin to get him to look up at you. There was an amused expression over his features while you caressed over his face. “Dressed in a costume you hated, making our children happy being the sweetest father.”

“Ah,” Negan snickered, turning his head to the side to place a kiss over the center of your palm. “You have a Winnie the Pooh kink, huh?”

“Oh stop,” you rolled your eyes hearing his laughter follow and he tugged you down to fall in over his lap. Hooking his arms around you, Negan started to tease you with the idea of kissing you, but it was just a faint brush of his lips over yours. “I just love you. So much.”

“I love you more,” Negan hummed, finally claiming your lips in a kiss. Your kisses grew in strength and before you knew it, you found yourself at the center of your bed with Negan crawling in over you after he managed to strip off the remainder of his clothes. “It’s been a while since we’ve gotten to be with one another like this. We usually have one of the kids with us at all times.”

“Then we better take advantage,” you suggested, brushing your fingers through his wet hair drawing him to your lips again letting out a soft moan when he entered you. The rolling of his hips was slow over you while he took time to pamper you. “Negan.”

“We should have grabbed that devil costume before we did this,” Negan hummed against the side of your neck making you both laugh. Dropping his forehead against yours, Negan’s winces grew louder with every thrust he made over you. “Fuck.”

“Yes,” you purred in his ear, curling your fingers into the curls at the back of his neck.

“Yeah?” Negan breathed out, his hazel eyes locked on yours when every move he made grew in strength. The sound of crying filled the air over the baby monitor and Negan let out an overwhelmed sound, his head burying against the side of your neck. “No, no. Fucking, shit.”

Amusement flooded your veins when you stroked your fingers through Negan’s wet hair realizing that you weren’t going to be able to finish with Noah crying, “I can get him.”

“No,” Negan groaned out, pulling his hips back and away from you with a wince. Reaching for his athletic pants, he pulled them up and over his hips adjusting himself when they were on. “I’ve got this.”

“Maybe Emma was right. We should stop at two,” you teased watching Negan swiftly crawling back in over the bed to pepper kisses over your lips.

“Nah. I want a fucking baseball team,” Negan slurred against your lips and it made you chuckle against his flesh. “I got this, but when I’m done with the little dude, I’m coming back in here and we’re finishing this up.”

“Sure we are,” you mused knowing that it would probably take a while to get Noah settled again. Negan held his finger out and pointed at you which made you laugh. Even if you didn’t get as much romantic time as you may have wanted with Negan, it was all worth it to you. Because living your life with Negan was better than anything you could have hoped for.

----

Tags: @slutlanna976 @fuckthis-and-fuckthat @jennydehavilland @de-gabyconamor @ibelongtonegan @smallsadjellyfish @labyrinthofheartagrams @msjamesmarch @thebeautysurrounds @hotfornegan @redmercysugar @caprithebunny @tuttifuckinfruitty @emoryhemsworth @a-girl-interupted @akumune @stoneyggirl2 @xsarcasticwriterx @insertneganhere @haleygreen23 @xhannahbananax03 @sanctuaryforthelost @burningredaffair @killaweiser @dead-of-niight @ayumi-wolf @hollyismentallyillhelp @promiscuousbarnes @tone-stark @lanadelnegan

#Jeffrey Dean Morgan #Negan #Negan fanfiction #negan x reader #The Walking Dead #twd fanfiction #Negan x you #Halloween #Halloween fic #Negan Smith #Negan Imagine

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