#my teacher really wants me to go grosser with it

[catgirlforeskin]

This may border on victimblaming, but most of stories about how someone was "groomed" online that I saw (I didn't research it, mind you, just what crossed my dashboard) read to me as "I am a total dumbass who doesn't have common sense and I am going to blame everyone for this".

Like older* guy on forum who talks about how you being offline makes him want to kill himself is not a good man, and neither are any other kinds of "online groomers", but literally nothing about technology makes them more dangerous.

(*Assuming that he is in fact older, I also was "in my early 30s" online since I was 12, but that's not that important because him living who the fuck knows where makes any actual power imbalance irrelevant, and teenagers are very much capable of being cruel and manipulative).

In fact, online interactions are way safer for kids because they fucking can close the tab and forget about everything that happened. Restrictions on children's access to internet doesn't help them. I am not even going to talk about how abusive families can be - outside of home is also not that safe, and people actually may have power over you. In my high school there were rumours about certain teachers sleeping with certain students. I don't know were they true, but I myself was present when one of our teachers went on a discussion about how it's better for schoolgirls to date college students and graduates to "get better experience". People who live close to you may be very gross and bigoted, in fact there is someone close to you and bigoted. Slightly older people can tell about absolutely awful culture of teen neighborhood groups (idk if there was something like that in USA but that's when people of one urban neighborhood hang out together purely because they live close by).

Mind you, I grew up on my local equivalent of 4chan, and while I don't think that it was good for me, the grossest experiences I had were all IRL. Yes, some of those anons may be totally inhuman, but I didn't have to listen to their bullshit, while IRL I had not only to listen but to politely agree, or the middle aged man with ego of a toddler and the middle aged woman who believes in every conspiracy on Earth and the teenage boy who thinks that he is the protagonist of life will be offended, and I am a good kid so I shouldn't make them sad :(

P.S.: Anecdotally, "normie" online places felt way grosser than imageboards. Part of it may be because it was before Trump ruined online everywhere, part of it that those "normie" online places were not as normal as they liked to pretend, but I think that the correct answer is that 4chan is not some malicious entity that corrupts our world, not even really marginal group - it's just content of middle class cranium without flattering makeup of civility. Still, don't go there

P.P.S.: I focused on school because the discourse was about kids, but like, you realise that adult abuse on workplace and such can be way worse and actually endanger your life in the way online never can, right?

Yeah, definitely, it’s an extension of the “stranger danger” model of abuse instead of the reality where most abuse comes from people you know that have power over you, whether it be in a family, school, or work setting. I was constantly told not to talk to strangers online because they’re dangerous by a family member who was literally abusing me lol.

There is harm that can be done by having unfettered internet access as a kid, but until the astronomically greater harm of kids having no rights in the face of parental dominion is addressed, I don’t think parents having more rights to control their children is a good idea

#asks

[justthemoonz]

Over the course of several years I've had a really hard time struggling to do things due to shit that happened to me in the past due to being bullied, losing people I love, losing my pets, and other personal issues (that involve even grosser things)

Brushing my teeth, showering, helping clean the house etc. stuff like this ended up just becoming something I couldn't do, even if I really forced myself to (I had to go to the dentist twice or three times in order to get my teeth fixed because I just couldn't brush them)

The only thing that kept me going were my friends, but at times I felt like none of them really cared about me, or that I was too annoying for them, it's how I ended up losing most of them at one point

But drawing has always kept me going, no matter what, I've always drawn

There was a time where I used to draw for others, because I wanted to be popular and known, but overtime that started to make me feel like shit too and even almost got me to stop drawing for a good while also

And yet, I just never did stop drawing, but instead of drawing for others, I've drawn for myself, no matter how cringy or shit the drawing was, I didn't care, because I was drawing for myself and that made me happier

Being in high school also helped me overcome my shyness, I was a really shy kid back in school, my teachers always told me to "stay in my own bubble" while my classmares were constantly bullying me for being younger than them, even going as far as to hurt me physically and leave me with a crack on my head for about a week

But high school was a lot more fun, it made me feel like I could really speak for myself, and I even ended up making friends there that despite I don't really keep contact with all that much I still appreciate them and the way they helped me, even if they'll never know that

After finishing high school and learning how to draw for myself rather than for others I felt like I could do it again, I ended up being able to brush my teeth, shower, and do other things I wasn't able to do before again

Now I'm here, I feel much happier despite still having a few bad days here and there, and I feel like I can do anything I couldn't do before

Despite the losses and harm I've faced, I still love the friends I still have, the family I still have, the pets I still have

And I love being able to be happy for myself and love myself, even if I was bullied into hating myself for who I am

#vent post #but like a happy vent i guess? #it's venting but more like positive

[sketch-pencilpoint]

OK, here we go

Long rant time as I've been keeping a sort of happy persona here but

I am not happy often.

As someone with nerodivergency, I struggle to deal with ecces or overly annoying noises. This is a bad thing as everone in my school, from my YEAR 11 CLASSMATES TO COMPLETE STRANGERS ARE CONATANTLY MAKING THE MOST IRRITATING NOISES. These include humming noises (not really humming but it's the best way I can put it), saying things in a really infuriating and r-worded tone (not gonna say the word but you hopefully get the picture), some gross half gluping sound, even grosser slurping sounds, and for the strangers either their unwanted semi-flirts or the ones who just say (or YELL) my name at me despite me not knowing them.

I feel trapped. The teachers don't seem to hear them, my mother and her stupid husband are no help when I vent to them and the only reason I have yet to kill myself is because both my dad would be distraught and I would be in eternal purgatory as a result as I love my dad to death and because I have art to do, projects to work on and dreams to pursue.

I am constantly either miserable or really angry and no one will give me a break. Day after day, annoyance after annoyance and its building up until I feel fit to burst and scream and maim and kill and hurt others and I don't feel as if I could talk to someone who could help me. I also just feel afraid that I'll either be judged or put on a list or worse still.

I feel as if up until now on this hellsite I've been a happy and weird little fandom artist who was never really afraid to do or post what he wanted to, and I'm always there if you need someone to talk to and such, but I'll feel as if I'm not. I'm overly negative, I've always got something to winge about, and nowadays it feels as if actually enjoying myself or displaying my positive aspects is more of a rarity.

Also when I say my mother and stepdad are no help, is that they always make me feel as if I'm being unreasonable or rude and I always come away more upset as I feel made out to be the villain even if that wasn't their intention to what they were saying.

The only real solice I find is in drawing and when being through what I've been through as myself day after day after day after day after day its hard to find a real motivation to draw. It's hard. It's really hard. Not to mention I also have to worry about the future and all the adjustments I now have to make now that I am of to college. And I fear that it may suck almost as much there.

No comforts bring much comfort though, like how it will all be over soon. I want it over now. I won't end my own life though. I feel that is to far.

Sorry for this, I just, needed to get some things of of my chest.

#rant #sketch's rambles #tw suicide mention #tw rant #long post #vent

[toast-the-unknowing]

do u have some random headcanons for your foster care adam verse/childhood friends verse, that you'll like to share with us? if you want to of course, i just think that's your most potentially teen drama fic you have ever written, and i say that not in a bad way, i just think it's such a fun and comforting au :')

In sixth grade, they start middle school, and Adam gets bumped up a grade in math. He ends up in the same class as Declan and develops one of those awkward kid crushes you only realize is a crush years later. Ronan bugs Adam to finally get Debbie and Bill's permission to have Blue sleepover, so they all end up hanging out at his house more and at the Lynch house less. It does not occur to Adam that these two facts might be related.

In seventh grade Adam's adoption goes through. Adam continues to call Debbie and Bill by their first names; he thinks that they'd like it if he called them mom and dad, but they never actually say anything about it. It just feels too much like lying, to Adam, like pretending that nothing his parents did to him ever happened, and anyway, those aren’t good words to him.

In eighth grade, Blue and Ronan's running competition for who will get the bigger role in the school play backfires when they are cast as the two romantic leads of the spring show. Adam laughs at them a whole lot to distract himself from the weird emotions that he gets watching them hold hands and pretend to be in love. They stop acting after that show and go into the tech crew instead, which both Ronan and Blue claim was THEIR idea.

Freshman year, someone makes a joke about Blue having two boyfriends. She's not really surprised -- the jokes aren't new, although they're getting grosser and more uncomfortable as she gets older -- but she's kind of surprised about how pissed off Ronan gets. It's late enough at night that Adam (who has the earliest curfew) is already home and isn't around to be the voice of reason. They commit some light vandalism in revenge and then go grab ice cream to celebrate. Blue asks Ronan why it bugs him when people insult her. The answer is at least half that she's his friend okay, Jesus, what is he supposed to do, just let people talk about her like that; but instead of saying that what Ronan actually does is blurt out all of his feelings about Adam in the middle of a Dairy Queen at eleven o'clock at night. Blue's verdict: they are definitely going to need more blizzards to deal with this.

Sophomore year, Ronan's dad dies. Ronan doesn't handle it well. Adam gets worried about him one night when Ronan stops responding to his texts, and he sneaks out to find him and make sure he's okay. The next morning Adam isn't at school. Ronan feels like shit on top of everything else for getting Adam into trouble, until Adam shows up after lunch; Debbie and Bill let him sleep in since he was out so late, and then they wanted to make an appointment for him with his social worker, in case he needed to talk to someone about what he’s going through. He is super grounded, though. Blue takes over "make sure Ronan doesn't do anything stupid" duty. She doesn't to let him get away with anything.

Junior year, Adam and Ronan start dating. The getting together part is easier than Ronan had ever expected, and the dating part is everything he ever wanted; the hard part, the part that he hadn't really thought about, is keeping it secret. He wants to tell everyone: classmates, teachers, random people walking down the street, and yeah, his mom, why wouldn't he want her to know something so important about his life? But Adam isn't ready to; the first time they really talk about it he tells Ronan if your mom freaks out about it she can't send you back, which doesn't even make sense -- Bill and Debbie are super chill, for old people, plus they're those parents that volunteer for every field trip and shit, plus Adam is adopted so where the hell would they even send him to -- but Ronan doesn't have to get it to get that it's what Adam needs. So he keeps it a secret. Even though it's so fucking hard. The only person he gets to talk to about Adam is Blue, who is sick. to. death. of hearing him, quote, "writing the sappiest romance novel of all time, seriously, I'm gonna hurl," close quote.

(Adam's eventual coming out to Bill and Debbie goes just fine; they're kind of awkward but very supportive for him and they tell him that they love him and that "we always thought Ronan was a nice young man." There's at least one (1) Pride parade where they are very earnest and very embarrassing and Blue has zero sympathy for that, either, because seriously Adam you went to Pride with your parents, what did you think would happen?)

Senior year is weird, for Blue. She's happy for Adam and Ronan, obviously she's happy, that's what you are when your two best friends are happy, is happy. It's just that the three of them were always the three of them, and now a lot of the time Adam and Ronan hang out just the two of them and Blue's just...Blue. There's nothing to do about it, though, no one thing, so she does a little bit of a lot of things to see what helps. Dating doesn't -- Adam and Ronan have found the only two decent teenage boys in town, each other, and after a few attempts she gives up in disgust. She goes to a lot of parties for a while and turns out to have a terrifying aptitude for flip cup, but that's just all the same people she doesn't want to date and doesn't want to hang out with at school, and being around more people doesn't actually make her feel less alone. She tries some new clubs and new electives, likes shop a lot more than she expected, likes art a lot less than she expected, although some of the art kids aren't so bad. She sinks a lot of time into her college applications, all the same state schools that Adam's applying to, a bunch of West Coast schools that he isn't. She doesn't say anything about it to him; she's probably not going to get in and she can't afford it without a bunch of scholarships anyway, so there's no real point in hurting anyone's feelings. Just, if she's on her own, she wants to have things that are her own. She can have that and have Adam, who still lends her all his favorite books so they can talk about them, and gets a job at the same restaurant she does when she complains about how boring her shifts are, and comes over to watch readings and seances at her house, half-skeptical and half-enthralled. She can have that and have Ronan, who still gives her rides to absolutely anywhere she needs to go no matter how far it is, and goes thrift store diving with her for things that might make good costumes for the theater department even though every single opinion he has about clothes is WRONG, and texts her to tell her every time he goes to the bathroom, like that's something anyone wants to know. They're still the three of them, even if they have to rearrange things a little bit, and Ronan and Adam are still the people she shares everything with. When she gets pissed off her first day of classes in Berkeley, they're the first people she texts, you will not BELIEVE this jerk in my history discussion, he tried to pay me to be in his study group and they immediately support her -- or, Adam does; Ronan texts how much? but that's what support looks like, from Ronan. That's what she wants, for all of them, and she's happy, she's really, really happy.

#well this got. more emotional. than intended #not a fic #the raven cycle #Anonymous

[venus-says]

Yes! Pretty Cure 5 GoGo Episodes 38-48 + Movie

Bloom, flowers of life.

And we reach the end of another season! Wow, it has been a while since I could say this for precure. But we're finally here again.

The GoGo ending was a pretty interesting one, I quite enjoyed it, but before talking about it I wanna comment on the movie of the season because I wanna end this post on a positive note and if I leave this to the end I won't achieve that.

Y!PC5GG: Happy Birthday in the Land of Sweets♪

So, this movie was a choice. I feel like if you're someone who likes Nozomi and Coco you will probably like this movie, but if, like me, you're someone who sees this relationship as problematic then you will probably not care or hate this movie. To be honest, I think that even if you do like this pairing you may not like this movie as much, because even though this movie is very Nozomi focused and a huge part of that focus is on her relationship with Coco, the everything around it isn't much interesting so in the end, it's nothing really special.

I personally didn't enjoy this movie, but it wasn't even because of the Nozomi and Coco stuff. To begin I don't like that they introduced another character that is used to instigate jealousy in both Nozomi and Milk, thankfully they don't do much with that. I don't like how the other cures are useless here, like yeah, Aqua & Rouge and Mint & Lemonade fought against the minions but they didn't really impact the outcome of the movie, and they just forget Milk has powers up until the end where she's beaten down by the villain. And I also don't like how in the call to action scene they start to cheer for Dream only and not for the Precure and I don't know this kinda sounds disrespectful, it makes it look like the only important cure here is Dream and the other ones are just backup dancers, though Shining Dream is a pretty beautiful form, I can't deny that. But the thing I hate the most about this movie is one specific scene, while Coco is being controlled by Mushiban, and he corners Dream against a pillar or a wall and he gets close to her in a very predatory way and he says "Make me feel satisfied" and the way they frame the scene looks like it's something sexual and it's just very gross, and it gets grosser when you think it's a much older man behind Coco saying those words. I get that by the context of the movie he was just talking about turning Nozomi into chocolate and eating her like a snack, but the movie frames it like Coco is going to kiss Nozomi by force and it's not cool to see. I'll probably never watch this movie again.

While I'm still here in this gloomy mood let's talk about what I didn't enjoy in the actual season?

So my fears came true, we had almost like a boss rush in this final quarter which made those defeats a little less impactful, in fact, the first episode of this section we had the defeat of that pair of villains and I can't remember much about it. Mucardia's end was also kinda lame, first because we had a fake-out death and second because he was just killed away by the Director in the blandest way possible and it was pretty lame.

And speaking of lame endings, poor Anacondy. They really went to the "I'm in love with this man route" for her and in the end, she was just used and discarded by the man she loved like if she was the wrapping paper of candy, it was pretty sad. It was impactful, and it made me hate the Director more than I already did, but I wish she could have gone in a glorious way rather than by the hands of a crap man. And since we're talking about him, gosh I hate this dude. He's like those guys that get obsessed with a girl and just can't accept when they say no and instead of looking at themselves to try to find out why they don't want anything to him he just keeps forcing himself like if this is gonna change something. The Director is the concept of thrash man impersonated in a cartoon character. It was very cathartic seeing the cures whoop his ass with that giant rose.

The last thing I didn't like was the resolution for the mystery of Syrup's past. Like, seeing how this was a big thing throughout the whole season you would think his past would be more than just "he was born in the Cure Rose Garden, he was raised by Flora, and he was attacked while he was doing a delivery from Flora to the Director and that's probably what made him lose his memory". I don't know, for the amount of build-up this had I expected them to do something bigger with this. And it feels like that was the plan at some point because in the middle of the season we see Syrup meeting the Director and recognizing him from somewhere, it seemed like there was more to uncover there, but no, we just got some lame past stuff.

Before moving to the positives, I wanna quickly mention the Christmas episode that wasn't anything exceptional, but that there was some cool stuff in it, like Syrup being a fan of Santa since, when you think about it, Santa IS a delivery boy. To be honest, I was just glad they didn't have any sort of world-threatening invasion in this episode, it was very refreshing. XD

In any case, as it's usual for any precure season we get episodes for each cure's closing arc as an integral part of the final quarter. Being completely honest, I feel like Kurumi and Karen got the short-end of the stick here because while they had good episodes it didn't really give me the impression that they were concluding anything for them, different from Urara, Rin, and Komachi who got episodes where the conflicts had conclusions that tied-in more with their future aspirations and the path they've been walking through this season and also the previous one.

I think the reason why Kurumi and Karen's endings didn't feel as conclusive is that other things in their episodes stole my attention more than their conflicts. For example, in Kurumi's case, we see her feeling pressured because of her mission, which is very in tune with her whole thing as a caretaker, but this episode also shared space with working her relationship with Nozomi and that's what I was more focused in rather than Kurumi's personal thing that felt like it was more in the background. In Karen's case, the conflict was she doubting that she had what it takes to follow a career in medicine, but the show was putting more importance in King Montblanc being sick and again Karen's plot was kinda in the background. This is not to say that their endings were bad, it just seems a bit forgettable when you put that in comparison with the other episodes for the other girls.

For example, Urara's final episode was about her doing an audition to get in the same musical her mom performed before she passed, we also have a MOTW plot that works in a way to directly affect her negatively in this audition by making a Little Mermaid plot where Shibiretta steals her singing voice. This is a combination that works with Urara both in her precure life and in her civilian life. It concludes her arc and it feels rewarding to see her finally pass that audition. Kurumi and Karen didn't really have that. Actually, Rin and Komachi didn't have a conclusion that was so well rounded as Urara, but it was more centered on them, they were still in the center and able to shine in their episodes, though I wish Komachi had done more in her episode, it didn't really feel like she had much agency in that episode.

The Nozomi episode is a bit unfair to put in this comparison because while it is an episode that dwelled with her efforts in studying in order to fulfill her dream of becoming a teacher, this episode was more to show the difference of power between them and the Director while Nozomi's conclusion comes around in the end during the final fight and the aftermath of the battle.

And about this finale, this was very enjoyable. I like that we had the final conflict happening through 3~4 episodes but it didn't feel like they were stretching a plotline or maybe dragging the finale for more than it needed to. It was pretty solid, it was well built, and despite the problems, I mentioned it was pretty good. I think my favorite moment of this ending was when Syrup was giving his speech to the petrified cures, and we could see that the things he was talking about was pretty much related to his growth and his development through the whole season and it was pretty moving, I also think it was hella cute when he mentioned that letter the cures sent was the first letter he ever received in his life and that he was really happy about it, and my heart just melted and all I wanted was to hug him and say "you're a good boy, my son T-T" to him.

I also liked that whole seed of life and how seeds have infinite potential discourse at the end, yeah it was a bit of a stretch after all depending on the case seeds are pretty predictable, but it was a good message for the end, it hit the points it had to hit so I count it as a win. I also like how in the end Flora turned into a seed in hopes to bloom into a new life in the future, it was a pretty optimistic and happy way to end the show and it was a good way to wrap-up this pretty good season.

And that's it for Yes! Precure 5! I gotta be honest, I didn't think I'd enjoy this season as much as I did because I wasn't the biggest fan of its predecessor and I didn't have high hopes for the sequel, but I found myself enjoying the show more and more as I would go, even with its flaws and the elements I don't like. It was truly a joy to find a new love for this season, a new love for this world, and a new love for these characters. While the original season is at the bottom of my list of favorites during this series of rewatches, this sequel sits more close to the top, and that makes me very happy. So, what are your thoughts on GoGo? Let me know in the comments down below. Next, we're finally getting to Fresh which is one of my favorite seasons and I'M VERY EXCITED!!! I can't wait to watch this season again. But that's for another day, for now, stay healthy, stay safe, never stop resisting, thank you so much for reading, and until the next time. See-ya~

#Yes! Pretty Cure 5 GoGo #Yes! PreCure 5 GoGo #precure

[nbcreepere]

Beauty and the Stinky Boi (Remus x Reader) FULL BOOK

CHAPTER 1 I met Thomas a while back when he ran into me at a park. He was recording some sort of video and was walking backwards colliding into me. After that we decided to hang out. I found out he was a creative person who couldn’t help but love Disney and theater. He was also a great singer. After a few months of being his friend he showed me his sides. When I had watched the videos on them it was… well weird. I knew there was a creative, feelings, logic, anxiety, and lying side, so when he said he wanted me to meet them, I was confused. Weren’t they just him in costumes but with different voices? I went inside his house and he asked if i was thirsty. I politely denied hoping he wouldn’t be upset. He walked to the living room and had me sit down. “Ok so, are you ready to meet the others?” He asked with a smile. I can’t lie, I was scared and was hoping he wasn’t crazy. “Yes I am…” I tell him. Soon the people from his videos rose up and were right in front of me. There was the prince, the anxiety, the dad, the teacher, and the snake dude. That’s was the only way to describe them. The dad dude was the first to talk.“Hiya Thomas! What’s new!” His voice was filled with happiness. “Well, Patton,” I caught the name of the dad and did my best to remember it, “I brought my friend (y/n) and wanted to introduce you guys!” Thomas exclaimed in a happy manner. Patton looked over as though a puppy had done something adorable and waved,“Hi (y/n), I’m Patton!” He gave this big smile and I was still shocked that they were real. I soon stuttered out a hi. “The name is Logan.” The teacher told me. His hand was extended for a hand shake and I excepted. The prince came over and gave a slight bow.“I am Roman.” He said in a royalty tone. The one in a hoodie just stayed on the stairs and told me his name.“It’s nice to meet you Virgil…” I went ignored as he popped in some head phones. The snake dude and Thomas were arguing but I didn’t mind. “Just say ‘Hi I’m Deceit’ and you can finish it off with how you want.” Thomas’ words would only come to me slowly and piece by piece, leaving some words out. Soon the snake dude came over to me. “Hello, I am NOT Deceit, I WILL talk to you more so please, DON’T leave me alone.” He said. I was confused by this and then Thomas explained it. “Well, that makes more since now.” I giggled. "Now listen (y/n), there is some one else… but, you wouldn’t like him.“ Thomas tells me. I look at him with my eyes filled with confusion. "What do you mean?” I asked. Roman joined in. “Trust me he is a horrible man, the Duke that is. You wouldn’t like him… None of us do…” He snarled. “I might like him…” Roman, Thomas, and the others looked at me in shock. “You like him?” Roman asked with venom in his voice. “Well yeah, everyone deserves a chance to be liked… no matter who they are…” I looked down some what knowing how it felt to be not liked. Roman slightly scoffed at me. “Fine, I won’t say I told you so.” I nod at his words of a some what warning.“I’m ready to meet the Duke.” I say with confidence… CHAPTER 2 "But who will take you? I sure wont.“ Roman said turning away. Deceit grunted and walked over."I’m NOT going there so you may NOT come with.” He told me. I stood up and nodded. “Just remember (Y/N), if you need or want us to come get you just walk out of his room and call one of us, I’ll even come to get you and I’m scared of that place.” Patton said. “I will, but I will also try to know Duke before I judge.” Virgil has turned around and wont look at me, Roman is obviously angry, Patton is scared for me, and Logan just looked at me saying,“He can’t harm you unless you let him, and he’s not even that scary.” Patton calmed down at Logan’s words. I nodded and told Deceit I was ready to go. He grabbed my wrist a little too hard, but soon we were in what I believe is the mind palace. “This is the dark sides part of the palace, that is why it is NOT complacently dark and gloomy.” He says. He then points to the end of a hall on my right. “The very last door is his… I’d say knock and step back… he’s- well, we aren’t use to company.” I started to walk off and down the hall. I was filled with dread and a seance that i should run away, but I still went on words. The deeper I went into the hall the messier and grosser it got. The smell of it all burned my nose and I wanted to vomit. I put my shirt over my nose to some what block the stench. I finally reached the door and did the normal three knocks to get the persons attention and then took a step back. In a minute the smell went away and I was able to take my shirt off my nose. The door swung open and revealed a man with a mustache and a gray/grey (It’s spelled both ways and don’t know what one to put so sorry!) streak of hair. “What do you want Dubb-” He stopped realizing that I wasn’t who he thought I was. “Who are you?” He asked. “You are the Duke right? I’m (Y/N). I came to meet you.” He looked at me up and down trying to find something. “Yes, I am the Duke… who sent you and why? Is it pity? Did they do it out of pity?” He asked becoming upset. I shook my head,“ No, I wanted to meet you and get to know you. They actually told me that I shouldn’t and wouldn’t like you, but I thought I should give you a chance…” The feelings I had before were slowly getting worst until he grabbed my wrist and dragged me into his room. I was now standing at a desk and staring at papers and different things that were crafted by hand. I picked up a few papers and looked at them. They were crudely drawn and were a little disturbing. I put them down and switched it out for the stitched creepy animals. “This is a lot of my works! Some things need more blood, some more violence.” He said. I looked at him putting the idem down.“What side are you, exactly?” I asked. He looked up and I could tell he was hiding his sadness because only a hint of it showed. “I’m creativity! Well, I’m the dark twisted thoughts and well, you’ve seen some of them.” He said trying to sound confident. I looked down at the drawings again and it all came together. “Why don’t the others like you?” He some what walked off and he still answered the question.“They don’t like me because I’m not a good thing. It’s why I was alone for so many years, and why I decided to have a sudden out burst.” I nodded my head knowing how it had felt. “I understand where you’re coming from.” He looked at me shocked but had tried to hide it fast.“How?” He asked. CHAPTER 3 I looked at him and debated on weather or not to tell him. “I… I’m sorry I haven’t even told Thomas yet… I’m not fully comfortable with it…” I said apologetically. I could tell he was looking at me just dying to know. It was quiet for few minutes then he spoke up. “What’s you’re most disturbing thought?” He asked. “Well…” I stared to go on and on with it and he would jump in and give better ways of doing it. I could tell he got comfort from talking about dark things and he relaxed a lot more. He started talking about ideas he had and wanted Thomas too do, but was shut down each time. “I’ve seen you’ve drawn some and made others. I think they are… well…” I started thinking of a good word to say without hurting his feelings. “Terrible, horrific, nightmare educing…” He started. I cut in again to finish.“No, I would say I find them interesting. This right here,” I got up and went over to the table picking up a drawing I saw earlier. It was of a zombie unicorn. I showed him it and finished.“I really like it.” He smiled and I thought his face would crack in half with how big it was. We talked for a few hours and I noticed the time. “I hate to leave, but I have to get home for dinner. How about we hang out more?” I asked.“That would be fun! I’ve never had a friend to hang out with besides D and Emo, but Emo doesn’t visit any more.” He said. “Ok then how about… Monday’s and Friday’s?” I asked. He looked at what I think was a scheduled and set it aflame. “Yeah! My schedule’s cleared for everyday now!” I giggled at his joke. “Ok then. I’m gonna go hang with the others tomorrow if you want to join.” I told him and he was fast to reply.“I’m not allowed to… but I’ll try for you.” I gave a smile and said bye. Once I was out the door I called for one of the sides. Patton came down gave me a bear hug and got me out. He pushed me back when we were in front of the others. “Are you ok? Did he hurt you? Did he hold you captive? D-” I stopped the worried Patton an told him I was fine. “All we did was talk and get to know each other. We decided to hang on Monday’s and Friday’s, and I can hang with you guys any other days.” Roman was shocked, and Thomas was scared but had a scene of hope. “If everything goes well he might leave me alone without all those thoughts… I’m fine with you two hanging on those days, but if he does anything then Roman can handle it.” Thomas said. “Yes I will!” Roman stated loudly. Logan rolled his eyes.“(y/n) will be fine. Remus has a new friend and wont bother losing said friend because he doesn’t have any.” I was about to correct him, but my alarm went off. “I’m sorry Thomas I have to go. My roomie just finished dinner and if I want it warm I have to go now. See ya tomorrow?” I asked. “Yeah, tomorrow will be fine! See ya!” He said leading me to the door. Once I was out he said bye one more time and I walked off. My house wasn’t that far from his. It was four blocks away and I honestly liked the walk back to my house. CHAPTER 4 I woke up ate and headed to Thomas’. Once I was let in I saw there was a big fight. Remus was clutching something in his hands and Virgil and Roman were yelling at him. “What’s going on?” I asked Thomas. “Well… Remus came and wouldn’t tell us why he was here, so Roman and Virgil started yelling at him to leave and now are in a big fight.” He looked over at the three. I went over to stop them. “Ladies, ladies, you’re all pretty! Please stop fighting now!” I say loud enough for them to hear. “He is here and we don’t want him here!” Roman and Virgil said in union. “You should let him stay and give him a chance.” I calmly say. They started arguing again and Remus told them to stop.“I’ll leave…” He then turned to me and I was honestly confused. “but I need to give (Y/N) back the rose key chain she dropped in my room.” He said handing it to me. I looked at it baffled. I had gotten it from my mom, who got it from her mom, and it went far down the line. We called it the Rose of love because It always fell off when our forever lover was near and they always picked it up and gave it back. It happened to all of them and now it was happening to me. Soon Remus left and I sat on the couch pondering if what just happened was real. “Uh, (Y/N)? You seem out of it… is something wrong?” I looked up and wanted to tell Thomas so bad, but… the others I didn’t want to tell just yet.“I-I…” I was somewhat shaking and was having trouble. I soon pulled out my phone and texted him saying I would tell him, but wasn’t ready to tell the others. After he received it he nodded and asked the others to leave for a few minutes. Once they left he sat down and asked again. I told him the whole story.“This key chain has been in my family for years… my mom gave it to me on my sixteenth birthday. She then told me the stories and gave me the book that had everyone’s story. The stories usually start with the Rose falling off of the lady. After it falls off the forever lover, as we call them, picks it up and finds us. For my mom, hers fell of in a public place and my dad only found her by a gut feeling. She knew it was hers because of the engraved words on the back 'The Rose of Love’ and the fact it had the last name of its first holder in my family.” Thomas sat there and continued to listen. "I just have a sliver of trust in their stories and never thought it to be true. I have looked over how the Roes could fall off and had great explanations, but… yesterday I had it stuck on to my belt loop. It’s been stuck on it for a year. It fell off in his room… It was a mess and I would have though I would have noticed it gone. It was in his room and he brought it back to me.“ I finished. He looked at me somewhat questioningly and asked,"So do you think Remus… is you’re true love?” I looked up knowing I wasn’t ready for real love, I was only twenty-six. Yeah everyone else was ready but not me. “I…I don’t know…” He gave me a reassuring hug and let me stay like that for a while. “I don’t know what will happen if it’s a true story… and if it’s not true… I would have fallen for the hoax of my family.” I said in a slight whisper. “Well… what do you want to do about the others? Do you want me to tell them, do you, and if you do fall for him and he hurts you I’m here, I’ll always be here for you.” His words were calming and I felt safe. I pulled back and told him,“I know what they think of him… I’d rather not let them know, but thank you.” CHAPTER 5 "The others may come back now." I say to Thomas and he nods, but he doesn't call them back. "I'd say you should get home and read up on all those stories, see how they play out, cus if this is like a real fairy tale then something might happen and you seem like the one to want to be prepared." He told me. I nodded heading out. "Thank you again, Thomas." He only smiled and waved. After shutting the door I ran back to the house and opened the door short of breath. (B/f/n) Best friends name or friends name looked at me. "Oh you're back early-" They started. They looked at me with worry noticing I'm out of breath." What's wrong?" They rushed over. I could hardly talk and was having trouble standing. All I did was hold up the key chain. (B/f/n) knew what the story was and believed in it more then me. "It... fell off?" They asked. I slowly nodded and their mouth opened wide as if to say something, but nothing came out. My breath started to come back so I placed the Roes key chain and my phone on the counter and then I went to my room. I searched the book shelf for the journal and (b/f/n) leaned in on the door way. I found the book and pulled it out. (B/f/n) sat next to me on my bed and I started reading. Hours had passed and (b/f/n) fell asleep on my bed. I would have just crashed too but they took up all of the bed, well all but the spot I was sitting in. I went out to the living room and saw my phone had been going off. I went over and picked it up. Almost all of them were from Thomas. I texted back telling him what happened and what I learned. He asked some questions and I told him I'd bring the book over now if that was fine. He said it was so I headed over there. It was dark out when I walked over there. I looked at the time, nine thirty-seven. I left his house around noon so I was shocked that I was reading that book for at least nine hours. I knocked on his door and he answered. "Come in." He said opening it more so I could enter. I plummeted onto the couch and opened the book for him to read. He soon sat down next to me and got to reading it. My eyes grew heavier and heavier as minutes passed. Soon I passed out. I woke up the next morning on the couch and with a blanket over me. Thomas was up reading the book as he ate. I sat up and looked at him letting my eyes adjust to the room. He soon looked over and saw I was awake. "Oh good morning! Here's a recap. Last night you came over and after you sat down and I started reading the stories you brought you fell asleep so I stayed up reading and before going to bed I put you fully on the couch and put a blanket on you. After I woke up I came down to read some more and told the sides not to be loud so they stayed in the Mind Palace." He explained. I nodded and joined him after a good stretch. "What day is it?" I asked. "Friday." He said. I remembered I told Remus I'd hang with him on Friday's and Monday's. I wasn't going to break a promise because of some silly stories. "Think I could get a ride to hang with Remus?" I asked. Thomas had a big smile on his face and he nodded. "Hey Dec-" He couldn't finish before the one being called upon showed up. "You want to see Remus don't you?" He asked. "Y-yeah...ho-" I was now cut off by him. "He's NOT a big mess and you WON'T make him feel better." He warned. "What's wrong with him? Is he hurt?" I asked. 9/11/19 CHAPTER 6 "Well... You must NOT see..." He said. "Please take me to him." I said and then in a second I was in the Mind Palace. I raced to Remus' door and knocked. I listened in on him hoping to find out if he was in there. I heard soft sobbing and I knocked again. It stopped for a moment, and in that moment he pipped up. "Go away!" I could tell there was so much pain in his voice. I didn't have any words to say to him, I mean what could I say? So I knocked again. This time he stomped over to his door swinging it open and was ready to yell. "I SAID GO-" He then noticed who it was. "I...I'm sorry..." He said fighting back tears. "What's wrong?" I asked. He only looked up, his eye make-up was running down his face that was obviously from crying. "I-I'm fine." He lied. I looked around and seeing no one around I pushed him into his room and closed the door. I knew people could take it the wrong way but I know he needs to talk to someone right now. I sat him down on his couch and sat down next to him. "Now I'll ask again and please don't lie, you don't have to lie to me." He looked up and bit his lips. A few tears slid down his check disappearing in his mustache and down his chin. He finally spoke. "After you left yesterday Roman came to me. I was exited to see him. I mean my brother never visits me but... he told me... you hated me and didn't want to be rude. He said you were disgusted by me and the reason you quit talking and spaced out was because of me... I...I was so scared it was true... normally this stuff doesn't bather me,but... you wanted to meet me, and give me a chance. You actually like my ideas... He said you weren't coming back to hang out with me and that it was better for me to stay here..." He was trying not to cry. " I'm here now aren't I?" I asked. He nodded."I really like you, as a friend and all. I honestly think Roman is trying to be protective because he knows if I want to hang with someone I like I'll do it. I guess he thought chasing you away was the only way." I tried to comfort him. "Just know I will always come back and I'm always here for you." I told him in a calming voice. He put me into his tight embrace and cried a little more. I held him back and rubbed his back. I said a few calming words and he pulled back. "Thank you for being my only friend... and please don't tell the others about me crying." He gave a tiny smile. "As you wish." I smiled back. "Now How about we hang out?" He gave a quick nod and wiped the tears away and somehow fixed his make-up. "Well what do you want to do?" I asked. "Well... I know I like to do, but what do you like to do?" I started to think. "Well, do you like the outside?" I asked. I wasn't too much of a fan but I liked to go on walks, mostly threw the woods or in secluded areas. It gave me a scene of peace. "I've never really been outside." He told me. I looked at him saying,"I like to walk, I like horror movies, and another thing I like is (Hobby)." His eyes lit up. "Could we go on a walk?" He asked. "Well..." I started." Can you leave the house?" I asked. He shrugged."I don't know, plus I would have to see if I can leave." At the last part he pouted. "If you can get me to Thomas I can ask." In a mere second I was next to Thomas and Remus next to me. Thomas jumped almost falling."Hey, (y/n). Is something wrong?" He asked. "No, do you think Remus and I can go on a walk in some woods?" I asked. "Yeah that would be fine!" He told us. I smiled and whispered to him that he can continue with the book and he smiled and waved us off. "Don't get in to trouble!" He joked. We soon left and went towards the nears patch off woods. 9/12/19 CHAPTER 7 We soon entered the woods and looked around. He was running to each tree and looked at plants. He's pick up mushrooms and eat them right in front of me. "Why do you keep eating the mushrooms? Some of them are deadly!" I said as he put a red toadstool in his mouth. "I know they are deadly! Some of them could even make me high!" He said cheerfully. I went over too him and took the rest of the mushrooms out of his hand."How about we not try to kill our selves with mushrooms, or get high." I said both seriously but joking. He gave a small pout, but I started walking off. He soon caught up and was looking off the path. "Can we go over there?" He asked tugging on my arm. I sighed and started to say sure but I was dragged over too it. He stopped and looked at the opossum. "Is it dead?" I asked knowing these creatures to fake their deaths. He poked it and It was alive, but he couldn't tell. He soon picked it up and was checking it out. "R-Remus I wouldn't do that...." I was some what scared of what it might do. "Oh it's fi-" He was cut off by the opossum attacking him. After a few minutes of the attack he finally got it off of him. "Can we keep him?" He asked with the biggest smile on his face. I texted Thomas to see what he had to say. "Thomas said only if you can fully tame it in a minute." I said starting a timer. Remus started to try and tame it but was getting nowhere. All he was really getting was hisses, bite marks, and scratches. Soon the time ran out. "Come on, the time is out and you didn't tame it so you can't keep it. I'm sorry." He put the animal down and walked off. There was blood coming out of all the cuts and bite marks and he had bruises all over him. "So after this should I help with fixing you up? You have blood all over you." I said gently pushing him. "Only if you'll be my doctor." He some what purred. I rolled my eyes and started heading back. "Then come on. I'll doctor you up, ya big buffoon." I giggled at the last part and he did too. When we walked in Thomas went in to question mode. "What happened?" He asked. "A opossum attacked him. I'm gonna help him clean up then we will probably do more before I come back." I tell him with a smile. As Thomas gave a nod Remus took me back to his room. I fell onto the couch because I was still not use to going back and forth. I got up and got a rag that looked clean and went to what I assumed was his bathroom and ran it under the sink water. I saw a few things opened that had bite marks in them. I picked up the deodorant I found and it had a big bite mark out of it. I set it down and went back to Remus. I gently wiped away the blood and cleaned up his face and arms. "You should be more careful you know." I said without looking up. "I must ask, why would you care so much about my health? I know we are friends, but so is me and Deceit, and he could care less, so why do you care?" He asked. "Well I care because..." How could I tell him about the Rose? 9/15/19 CHAPTER 8 "Well, I find you as a really great person and I worry about my friends." I said. There was a little voice in the back of my head that was calling me a lair and weak for not telling him. Was I really falling for him? I won't, but my mind will continue with the fake rose story, or maybe real story. "Well, thanks (y/n). You are also... a really great friend." He sounded sad at the last part but I didn't want to pry it out of him. "Hey, do you think you could take me to Roman's room? I have to talk to him before I go?" I asked. "Yeah, I can do that. Would you also need me to be ready if you need to leave?" I nodded and he lead the way. "Why do you need to talk to my brother?" He asked. "Oh just..." I started but he cut me off. "You don't have to tell me... I can tell you are making up stuff because you don't want to hurt my feelings... Just... can I have the truth on one thing?" He asked. "You can have all the truths after this but I'll allow you to ask away." I said trying not to sound rude. "Do you hate me?" He asked not looking up from where he was walking. I stopped him and grabbed both his shoulders making him look at me. "You are my friend, I could never hate you and that's a fact." I told him as I waited for a smile. Once I saw the smile I pulled him into a hug and went into Roman's room waving bye. "Oh hey there (y/n)! I wasn't expecting you!" He was cheery with his great, but I couldn't help but think about the crying Remus earlier. He had made Remus cry and put those thoughts that I wouldn't come back. "Question." I simply say. Roman get's up from his little dressing room for his looks and sits on a couch, and soon enough he patted at the seat next to him. I sat on a chair opposite of him. "Oooooo, serious I see! So what's the question?" He asked. I was doing my best not to let it all over flow."Why did you tell Remus that I hated him or that I wouldn't come back?" His eyes grew ten times the size they should have. "How do you know about that? He could have lied!" He was trying not to shout, I could tell. "You made him cry and from what I've seen you and the others want me to stay away from him. He deserves a friend to care about him, so don't expect me to quite seeing him!" I some what yelled. It made him mad and he started the real yelling."WHY DO YOU EVEN CARE ABOUT HIM? HE'S NOT GOOD FOR ANYONE!" He swung his hands up and I flinched and went to cover myself. He didn't notice out of anger."BECAUSE I SEE THE GOOD IN HIM AND LIKE HIM OK!" I yelled back. I started tearing up but tried to hold it in. Before he could say or do anything else I walked out telling him not to bather me the rest of the day. After shutting the door I ran to Remus' room and sat down by his door. I curled up and cried not wanting him to know I was, but as I was crying the door opened and I was picked up. Soon enough I was placed on the couch and Remus tilted my head up. "What happened?" He asked in a calming voice. "I-I wanted to confront him about what he did to you... and I somewhat y-yelled and then he yelled at me and I yelled back and left..." I told him. I left out the part of where I was scared of being hit, but the rest he knew. He just pulled me into a hug as I had done for him not that long ago, only a few hours ago. I hugged back and smiled. Slowly the tears started to stop and we were laughing. "I think I'm ready to head back to Thomas if you are ok with that." I said with a smile. "I am indeed ready if you are." He smiled. Soon I was back in the house with Thomas but he was in the kitchen and Remus and I was in the living room. Before Remus left he kissed my cheek and left. What the hell is this feeling? 9/16/19 CHAPTER 9 He kissed my cheek. I placed my hand where he kissed me, it was a little wet but, to be honest I didn't care. I went in to Thomas' kitchen and wiped my hand on my pants. "Oh hey (y/n)! How did it go?" He asked. "I...He..." I couldn't form proper sentences. Thomas stood up worried and gently grabbed my shoulders. "(Y/N), what happened?" I finally gained my voice and told him."He kissed me..." Thomas put both his hands to his mouth in surprise. "On the cheek of course..." I added. He pulled his hands down and smiled. "That's amazing! I mean him falling for you, but not... well who he is, was he forceful?" He asked finally. "He was surprisingly genital, and his kiss left a little saliva but... it was sweet." A light blush dusted my face. "I see someone is forming a crush on him." He joked. "Oh shut it!" I joked. Both of us laughed he soon went to the book and sat back down."So I read up and found that the rose falls off, of course you know the first part, but it seem the third thing that happens is the two start to slowly fall in love because of small romantic jesters, after a while of falling in love comes the first kiss, then the dates, and well... marriage and a happy life." He said smiling. I smiled back."Thanks. Oh I should tell you... I might have gotten into a fight with Roman." He looked at me surprised. "What happened? Roman doesn't usually fight unless it's..." He stopped remembering how earlier Deceit told them how Remus was doing and the fact Roman hated his brother. "I see... how was Remus?" He asked. "I went to his room, and he was crying. He told me what Roman had told him, that I wouldn't come to see him and I thought he was disgusting to the point I didn't want to be his friend. I calmed him down and he quite crying, then we hung out as you saw us leave. Once we got back and I patched him up I went to talk to Roman. When I did I asked him why he said those things. I might have raised my voice and he rose his and when he did he raised his hands, I did panic because well... anyways I left crying and sat outside his door crying before going in. He picked me up, took me in, and helped me quit crying." I smiled. "Well I'm happy to hear that!" he says. I felt a buzzing sensation in my pocket and pulled out my phone. It was a text from (b/f/n).I looked at it and told Thomas I had to go in a rush."Ok, but wait you forgot your b-" I couldn't here him as I rushed out and ran back to the house. I had done a lot of running in just that one day, but it was all worth it. I opened the door and ran to (B/f/n). "What's wrong?" I asked. "You and me need to talk." They said. That's always something I found scary when someone started with it. "W-what?" I was scared now. "I've been trying to be nice, but I can't have you staying here and not doing anything. I've given you a choice that we agreed on and for the past week you haven't done any cleaning! The deal was I work you clean and cook without paying rent or both of us work and we split the cleaning." They started to raise their voice. They knew what happened to me, they knew it all. "I'm sorry if you want I c-" I was soon interrupted."No, I've already done it all!" In the past they have gotten mad at me, but it only lasted an hour or so, and they tried to keep their anger issues to a minimum. This time, they were going all out, but I know what they did was out of love but I was still scared."Get out and find some place to stay tonight because you aren't staying here!" They yelled. I packed a bag of cloths and a few other things then ran out crying. 9/17/19 CHAPTER 10 I ran out of the house crying with my bag on my back. Soon enough I ran into some one. "I-I'm sorry..." I stuttered while crying. I looked up and saw it was Thomas."Hey, hey, no it's ok..." He said reassuring me. "W-what are you doing h-here?" I asked in between tears. "I was heading to your place because you left your book... what happened?" He looked me up and down. "(B/F/N) k-kicked me out for t-the night." I knew I would tell him the whole story when I calmed down. "You're staying with me tonight then." He said leading me back to his house. I knew there was no point in fighting it so I didn't. Once he brought me inside we both sat down. "You can bunk with anyone you want, or I can sleep on the couch and you can have my bed tonight." He said so I would somewhat forget about and calm down from it. "N-no... I would rather sleep on the couch." I told him calming down. "Please, take the bed..." He wasn't going to push me about this. "Thomas, I-I love you like a brother, but I'm taking the couch, you need your sleep more then you think." This time he knew I wasn't giving up. After telling him the whole story he made dinner. It wasn't that bad. We laughed and played some games. It was fun, but soon night came and I changes into my pj's in his bathroom. A little later he told me goodnight and went to bed. He lent me a pillow and blanket, but I knew I'd have trouble sleeping. I lied there wide awake messing with the blankets and trying my best to fall asleep but it ended with nothing. I soon sat up and put my hands on my head. "Shouldn't you be asleep?" A voice whispered in my ear causing me to jump. I turned to see Remus giggling at what just happened. "I can't sleep..." I say. He looks at me, questions were obviously filling his mind. "Would it help if I offered my bed? It's big enough for five people." he said. "I'd have to tell Tho-" He interrupted me."I did by going into his dream!" A moment later a groggily Thomas yelled from upstairs."Ok Remus, and don't enter my dreams again!" Remus reached for my hand and I took his. We were soon in his room and he cleared off a side for me."Here you can have this side and I'll have this side." He told me. I nodded and slid under the covers. In a few minutes he was out and I was still up. I turned over and he was closer to me then before. I went to move to give him more space, but he wrapped his arms around me and was cuddling me. It was nice and thank's to him I fell asleep. I later woke up to go to the bathroom, but Remus still had a hold of me. "Could you please let me go for a moment? I'll be back." I whispered, but nothing happened. "Please, I just have to go to the bathroom." I finally said, and his grip on me was lose to the point I could go. When I came back he was lying on his back asleep so I slid right next to him on his arm. I expected him to turn over to hold me, but he turned me over so I was now lying on his chest. I was blushing,but I wouldn't tell him ever. His heart beat was like music to my ears, his breathing was rocking me back and forth in a soothing manner, his arms were gently placed around me. I knew I was falling for him, but did he like me back, or was he using me? I was to tiered to care and fell asleep right there on him. Perfect and warm. 9/17/19 CHAPTER 11 I woke up to a still sleeping Remus and I just lied there in his arms. I wouldn't admit it, I was falling for him. He soon woke up and quietly whispered things to me, thinking I was asleep of course. I just listened. "I'm sorry I grabbed you last night. I should have warned you I'm a cuddly person. I know you are asleep so I'll let you sleep. I'm also sorry for kissing you yesterday... I know you can't like me like that, but hey it was worth a shot. I mean, I do really like you... oh... that's absurd isn't it?"He went on and after he was done and it was a good five or so minutes I pretended to wake up. "Oh, morning (y/n)." He smiled. I faked a yawn and said it back. "Sorry that I fell asleep on top of you... you pulled me in and well... I passed out." I said. "It's fine, I'm sorry for grabbing you. That was on me." He let out a slight laugh. "It's fine." I said. I soon got up from him and sat at the side of the bed. "Are you hungry?" Remus asked getting up. "Yeah, a little." I looked back at him and stood up almost falling from my legs still being asleep. "Well, what I like to eat is different from what you like, so I'll take you back to Thomas." Remus took my hand and we were there. "Morning (y/n)! Morning Remus!" Thomas greeted us. "You guy's hungry?" He asked. "Yeah that's why I brought (y/n) here." Remus told Thomas. Thomas turned around and put another pancake on a plate. "Ok the others will be here to eat soon, Remus are you gonna join us?" Thomas asked with a smile. It seemed that Thomas was having less problems with Remus and wanted him to hang out. "I...uh, I can't." Remus sounded off. "The other's don't like me, plus I hate Pancakes." He said. "Anyways I'm gonna go back to my room." He finished with a smile. I went over and hugged him before he left. Thomas did a tiny giggle just as Remus left. "Awwwww.... So how did your guys' sleepover go?" He ask. I blushed at the question and remembered what happened. "It was good. I was able to sleep well." I didn't want to bring up what fully happened. "I'm glad to hear that!" Thomas sat down the plates and put pancakes on each plate. Each side came and sat at different seats. Patton took the seat next to me and smiled poring syrup all over the pancake . "Hiya kiddo!" He smiled then took a bite of his breakfast. I smiled back too him."Hey dad." I said without thinking. "I-I'm sorry, it slipped out. I didn't mean to call you dad, Patton." I was panicking now. He only smiled."It's fine! You can call me dad all you want! I don't mind having two wonderful kids!" I smiled and nodded. I looked at the others and saw that Logan only had coffee and was reading. It was the Sherlock series. Roman was cutting his pancake and making it into a dragon before adding some butter. Virgil just started eating his. Thomas sat down next to me and added what he wanted on his. I took a bite and realized how good it was. I almost shoved it in my face right then and there, but didn't want to be rude. I soon got a text saying I could come back, so after some talking and playing around I went back and things turned out better then I would have thought. 9/19/19 CHAPTER 12 After a month or so we all go along. Remus would avoid the others but other then that it was fine. There were night's I'd hang with Remus and we'd crash on the floor or even on the bed. After we would separate he'd either kiss my hand or my cheek. It would always leave a wet spot where he kissed me, but I didn't mind. Roman quit talking bad about Remus after I confronted him and the other's avoided talking about him. I didn't mind because Remus and I wouldn't talk about them unless they had upset me. It was all going well until one day Roman broke. "I don't want you seeing him!" He let out. "Why? Because you don't like the fact I can be friends with someone like him?" I asked. "No because he will hurt you! He will trick you and steal from you and do much worse! HE IS A MONSTER!" Roman yelled. I flinched and backed away which made Thomas try to intervene. "Roman you need to c-" Roman used his powers to lift Thomas' left arm to shut him up."Stay out of this Thomas! You are going in to unknown waters and you're gonna drown!" He yelled. I was backing up and fell on the couch. I got up and moved away."I FORBID YOU FROM SEEING HIM!" He yelled at the top of his lungs. It was rare for him to do this. Patton was scared and ran over to Logan who held him. Virgil ran to his room because he started panicking. I was now in the corner with only a few feet separating us, and with the last bit of courage I had I yelled at him. "YOU CAN'T STOP ME FROM SEEING THE PERSON I LOVE!" I had tears filling my eyes. He paused before getting even more mad. He reached his hand up in the air and I flinched. I heard the slap of his hand on skin, but I felt nothing. I was in a defensive position and had my eyes close, so when I opened them I din't expect to see Remus rising up from taking the blow. There was a hand print on his face and he was mad, not as mad as Roman, but still mad. "Don't ever touch her again." He said venom in his voice. Roman stepped back. Remus pulled out his mace and went towards his brother. I grabbed his arm and he looked back at me. His eyes softened as he looked into my eyes. He put his mace away and looked back at Roman. "You ever and I mean EVER hurt (y/n), and so help me, words can't describe what I'll do too you!" Roman said nothing as Remus walked back to me. "Are you alright?" He asked softly. "I am now...thank you." I said looking up at him. Roman sunk down and left."I only did what I had to too protect the one I...what's that word? Love? Ah, yes the one I love." He said smiling. I had a slight blush on my face."Y-you love me?" I asked. He only smiled and pulled me into a sweet kiss. It had been a while since I was kissed like how he kissed me, and I didn't want it to end. He pulled back. "I'm sorry, but I couldn't help myself... I understand you won't like me like that, but this is how I feel." He said to me. Thomas was finally able to speak and went in to his question."You haven't told him... have you?" I shook my head. "I-I'll tell you all you need to know. The Rose key chain I dropped has the biggest backstory to it..." I then told him everything about the Rose. 9/21/19 CHAPTER 13 Warning: There will be references to having sex, but no smut. I don't do smut. There may also be miner cussing and violence. Like no one get's a tiny hand print on them, it's a little worse. Sorry in advance. A few days after he had kissed me and saved me from being hit by Roman we hung out. We loved just hanging out, it was because we loved seeing each other and even just being funny or weird. That first real kiss was the last one he gave me. I was to scared to kiss him or fully tell him how I felt towards him. Today we were in his room and decided to just stay there to not run into one of the others. We watched some movies for the first part of the day. We went back and forth with Disney movies and horror movies. He would chose horror movies that would be gory and disturbing, but if I was scared by any part he would let me hold him, so I just held him during each one of his movies. During his he would say what they could have done to get away or how fake some stuff was. I chose all my favorite Disney movies, and I got to chose the last movie. I thought of a good Disney movie and soon turned on Beauty and the Beast. We watched it and he was actually enjoying it. He was watching it as if it was one of the, what he called, great parts in a horror movie. After the movie ended he wanted to hear me sing my favorite part. I told him I wouldn't because I'm not one to sing for others. He gave me puppy eyes and a frown. "Fine, but you have to sing your favorite song from it." He only smiled and nodded. I soon song the song and he applaud. I was flustered but he started singing Tale as Old as Time. He wasn't bad at singing as it was soothing to the point I could sleep. He finished with a long ending and sat down. "You sound... amazing!" I told him. He smiled saying,"Thanks,(y/n). You aren't bad yourself!" I smiled at him. We started on the next thing. We were drawing and being creative, him a little more disturbing, but it was alright. I was just doing some random sketches as he drew actual pictures. When he would finish he'd go and show me being very proud of it. "I love it!" I would say giving a loving smile. After a few hours of drawing we played board games. He would fail to understand the rules and would try setting the board on fire. We set that aside and decided to make a game. "Ok so the game could be we have to change something about us slowly, whether it was cloths or adding make up, and wait till the other person notices. If they catch you in the process of doing something of changing your appearance you lose." He said loving his idea. "Yes! I love it! Let's start it now!" I exclaimed. I would keep a very close eye on Remus so I could try to win. We did a few other things and ended up lying down on his bed. Our feet were dangling off and we were on different sides of the bed. We were just talking and it had been about an hour since we created the game and he had done nothing yet. I guessed he forgot so as I got him talking about one of his ideas I slipped off my jeans and slipped on something close by that was his. I was unlucky and had grabbed a pair of boxers. I hoped they were clean as I slipped them on and waited. Just a while after we were moving around and playing games. He hadn't noticed that I was wearing his stuff at all so I was winning the game so far. We sat down and started playing truth or dare. "Is it true that you love me as the mighty hero?" He asked to my truth. "Why yes it is my brave knight." I joked. "Truth or dare?" I asked. He didn't have to think about it as he said dare. I thought for a second of what the dare should be." I dare you to act a lot more clean minded for ten minutes!" He almost went pale."Fine! Truth or-" He stopped, I guess he was waiting or thinking of something."dare?" He finished. "Truth!" I smiled. "Are those my boxers that you are wearing?" He asked. I looked down and remembered our game and how I just won. "Yes they are, and I jus-" He cut me off by pulling me into a kiss like the one the day he saved me. I kissed back and when we finished he asked me if I liked him like that. "You fool, I love you." I said kissing him. He soon stood up and picked me up with him. My legs were wrapped around his waist as we kissed. He sat down on his bed and pulled apart from me. "How far may I go?" He asked looking me up and down. I paused and waited for a minute."The ten minutes are up so let your mind lose on me." I didn't care any more, I trusted him, loved him, and he is my forever love. After I told him that he did let his mind lose. I woke up the next morning lying next to Remus. Our cloths were in different places and I could't see some of them. Hickey's were all over me and I didn't care because it was amazing. I snuggled up to his warm body and closed my eyes. He hugged me back and opened his eyes. "Good morning beautiful." He whispered to me. "Morning. Can it just be night again?" I asked jokingly which made him laugh a little. "Was it that good?" He asked. "Better." He gasped at my response, but I could feel him smiling. "Are you hungry?" I asked him. "Only for you."He purred. "No you dork, for actual food." I giggled. "Calling me a whale dick now aren't we? Well, I'm not, but if you are I can take you to Thomas' to eat." He said kissing my forehead. I nodded."That would be lovely." I got up and got dressed. I couldn't find my shirt so I just put on a big hoodie. He slipped something on and gave me another kiss. He took me back, but we were in a closet. Before he left he put my hand on the doorknob so I could open it. I opened the door and there Thomas was placing some food on the table. "Hey, (y/n)! You cam just in time! Breakfast is ready! Have a seat." He said cheery. The others came down and I did my best to hide the hickey's that they might see. After breakfast we all sat down to talk. Roman was distant and tried not to talk to me, but I would catch him staring at me. While me and Logan were talking Roman came over to me. "What's that on your neck?" He asked rudely. I was a little scared. I was sore from the night before and was in no position to fight. "Are those...hickey's?" He asked. "W-what? Roman just leave m-" Before I could finish he took the hoodie off me. I did my best to cover up because my top was not covered (if girl then you had a bra on or binder). He looked at me and took my left wrist with a tight grip. Thomas wanted to intervene but I told him to take the others out. Roman's grip tightened and I felt a sharp pain come from my wrist. "I told you not to see him, didn't I?" He asked with an angry tone. I was to shaken to say anything. "DIDN'T I?"He yelled. I panicked and tried to punch him, but he dogged it. "You're a pathetic slut to go for someone like him!" He yelled throwing me on the floor. my back hurt like hell, but I managed to get up and slip the hoodie back on. Thomas rushed down and hugged me."I'm so sorry... I don't know what's gotten into him. We all decided that with how you are lowering Remus' thoughts he gives me we will support and protect you two." Thomas told me."Thank you guy's..."I said in between tears. Thomas called for Deceit to take me back to Remus. While walking Deceit asked what happened. I explained how Roman freaked out because of Remus and me doing what we did. Deceit looked at me saying that he might know what's happening."There are times when a side can get a bug, it does NOT mess with how they act. I know there is NOT a cure for it, so I WON'T look for it." He told me leading me to Remus' door. I thanked him and went in. I told Remus what had happened and he was mad. He pulled out a mace and started storming towards the door. I stopped him. "Remus please, don't. You can worry about him later, but I think he broke my wrist, or fractured it." I told him. He stopped and gently grabbed my wrist examining it. "That asshole of a brother fractured your wrist." He said leading me to his bathroom. He started looking in cabinets and pointed to the toilet so I sat down on it. He pulled out a wrap and came over to me. He gently started wrapping my arm and looked at me. "After this, you know I'm going to kill him right?" He asked raising an eyebrow. "Remus, please don't. Just... stay with me, please." I bagged him. "Give me a good reason why." He said. "Because, I need you to check my back and I don't want to be alone..." I said. Remus lifted up the hoodie and looking at my back. "That's bigger then my dick..." He said. "You have a large bruise on your back." He was angry. He carried me to the bed and let me borrow some cloths for pj's. I sunk into his bed and as he tried to walk off I grabbed his wrist. "Aren't you gonna stay with me?" I asked. I didn't want him to hurt Roman with the new info I had gotten. "I'm just going to change, hot cakes." He said. Once he got back he climbed into the bed and held me by my waits as to not hurt my back and touch the bruise. He made sure to be very gentle with my fragile body. "I'm sorry about my brother." He whispered to me. "It's not your fault, so please don't be sorry." I said looking him in his gorgeous eyes. He looked back into mine and kissed me. "Someone has to be sorry for him." He said. I shook my head and tried to move. I had trouble and let a small moan of pain out as my wrist some what bent. "Normally I'd say that your moan is cute, but it's not right now." He said turning onto his back and then putting me on top of him. It was just like when we first slept together. I loved it. "Are...are we a thing now?" I asked him. He took a minute to think about it. "I marked you as mine so yes. I guess you could say our love is the beauty and the beast." He said with a smile. I smiled back and kissed him saying,"More like beauty and the stinky boi." I joked before falling asleep. 9/22/19 published on 9/29/19 It's my birthday! Yaaaay... 15 years of living is not my idea of fun. Oh well! I give you guy's this 5 page, 1996 word, rollercoaster of a chapter! I hope you enjoy it and honestly, I love reading why you guys comment on the book, I always reply unless I don't know what to say. I love you guy's and have a lovely night! CHAPTER 14 I woke up with my whole body feeling bruised and I really didn't want to move. Remus was snoring, but I paid no mind to it. Suddenly I heard a knock on the door. "Hey, you're gonna have to let me go to answer the door, I'll be right back." I whispered to Remus. He let go of me and I got up. The person had started knocking again. I opened the door and there stood Deceit. "I DIDN'T find the cure for his bug. We MUSTN'T go now to give it to him." Deceit told me. I nodded. "Where is Roman?" I asked. "The others AREN'T trying to talk to him." I froze. "Then we must go now." I said rushing Deceit to take me to them. Deceit and I were in the living room and Roman was yelling. "What do we have to do?" I asked Deceit. "We have to get him to drink it, but with the fact that it's NOT the colour he WOULD drink it will be hard." I took the concoction and looked at it. It was a green colour. "Can you mix it with other things?" I asked him. He gave me a nod so I went in to the kitchen and pulled out some lemonade. I pored the cure into the cup first and added lemonade to fill the rest of it. I mixed it around and when over to Roman, taking a deep breath. "Here Roman. I just wanted to say, I ditched Remus and made you some lemonade as an apologize..." I lied. Roman took the cup and the others were shocked at what I said. "If my throat didn't hurt from yelling at morons I wouldn't drink it, but I forgive you." He said chugging the whole drink, and next thing I knew he was on the ground. "ROMAN!" Patton yelled out in panic. "He WON'T be fine. I knew what was wrong with him so I made the cure and (y/n) got him to drink it." Deceit stepped in. "And how can we trust you?" Virgil asked. "Because I trust him." I said. Roman started waking up and everyone looked at him. "What happened?" He asked. "Let's just say either way you're all better." I told him. I soon sat down and told him everything. He looked away and felt ashamed, from what I could tell, of what he did. "(Y/N) I'm so sorry... I-I would never hurt a woman, let alone a friend!" He told me with sorrow in his voice. I gently hugged him and told him I forgave him. He hugged back and told me I need to go back to Remus. "I can feel him beginning to worry about you... You should go..." He said. I wiped a tear away and holding out my pinky. "Friends?" I asked. He took my pinky with his."Friends." He said. Deceit soon took my arm and told me we had to go before Remus flipped. "I'm so UPSET that it worked..." He said. "Me too..." I soon got to Remus' door and opened it. I was tackled into a hug and was left in pain. "Ow, babe please, I'm still bruised." I told him. He got off of me and picked me up. "I'm sorry... I was just so worried! Where were you?" He asked. "Well Deceit knocked on the door and took me to the others... Roman won't ever act the way he did again and even apologized." I said giving a bright smile. "Good!" He said. "That means no hurting Roman ok?" I asked. Remus pouted. "Fine..." He took me over to the couch and started watching movies. 9/29/19 CHAPTER 15 Remus and I was watching movies on the couch when a knock on the door could be heard. "Remus..." I started, but couldn't finish due to him already getting up to answer it. "I'll get it." He told me with a smile. After he opened the door I heard yelling. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE YOU MISERABLE SACK OF S-" He started but I cut in. "Remus who is it?" I asked. He looked back at me and started to slowly smile. "It's my brother..." He sounded calm for a man who was just yelling a minute ago. "Oooo! Let him in!" I said smiling. Remus pouted and shook his head. I was soon giving him the puppy dog eyes and had my bottom lip out more."Pleeeease... for me?" I asked. "Fine... only for you..." He said letting his brother in. The two shot daggers at each other with their glares. "(Y/N)! I have brought something for your wrist and back..." He said pulling out a container of goo. "This is from an enchantress whom I had saved on one of my many adventures! It is suppose to heal all wounds, and with what I did... I thought I'd give it to you. You do really need it." He told me handing over the jar. I smiled as I took it. "Thank you Roman." I said giving him a hug. I could tell Remus was becoming jealous so I let go of Roman. "Anyways, I just came to give it to you as an apologies gift. I shall be on my way." He said waving a goodbye. Remus slammed the door shut which scared me. "Stupid brother..." He muttered. I felt bad knowing that Remus was like a big puppy, always needing attention and love and I just loved on another puppy. "Hey Remus..." He snapped his head back to me. "Yes?" He asked. "Would you mind helping me out? I don't thing I can get my back." I told him truthfully. "Sure..." He came over and started rubbing the goo on my back and I put some on my wrist. After a few minutes the goo disappeared and I didn't feel an ounce of pain. "Thanks, babe." I turned to him. "No problem..." He said not looking at me. I could see what looked like tears swelling up in his eyes. I soon went and hugged him. "I'm sorry..." I told him. He looked back at me shocked. "For what?" He asked. I didn't know what to say, usually when I said it no one would ask what for... they just told me I should be. "I know you're upset that I hugged Roman..." I started."I only find him as a friend. I love you and you alone..." I told him. He soon hugged back. "I know I'm just to scared to lose you to him..." He told me. We stayed like that on the couch for a while. "You won't ever lose me." I told him. "But if I do lose you to Roman I'll put his head on a spike and feed his corps to the others." He said laughing. Just by his cute laugh I knew he was joking.I laughed along with him. I was at peace, but my past still haunts me and I knew I'd have to tell Remus one day. i would have to tell him that I didn't believe the Rose of Love was real and how I panic under any form of force I didn't want. It was a rough past for me, but having Remus was all worth it. I soon drifted off, but I woke to Remus carrying me to bed then slipping in next to me. He wrapped his arms around me and we both fell asleep. I can't thank him enough for loving me and caring. 9/30/19 Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! It's 1 A.M. and honestly I wrote in my sleeping problems in chapter I don't know, so the reader should, if I did it all, have problems getting to sleep, waking up, and constantly wake up in the middle of the night. Basically what I'm getting at is even though it's a school night I'm having trouble sleeping thus I created another chapter. Man... I love writing this, but honestly I shouldn't stay up late to do it... Oh well! I hope you enjoyed this chapter and have a lovely night! CHAPTER 16 I got up and looked over to where Remus should be, but he wasn't there. I panicked and shot up. "Remus?!" I called out. I was scared. I didn't know where he was. He was always next to me before I wake up and today he's not. "Remus?!" He soon popped his head out of the bathroom running towards me. "What's wrong?" He asked also in a panicked tone. I hugged him and calmed down slowly. "I-I didn't know where you were... I'm so use to you being in bed with me..." I told him. He held me close to him and rubbed my back. "I'm sorry... I didn't mean to scare you and I never will scare you again..." He reassured me. I held on tighter then he was holding me. "It's fine..." I told him, but it really wasn't. I had been use to people leaving me in the night and day to see others, that's what he did...but Remus was different. He didn't take the Rose like the other did. "Hey Remus, how long have I stayed with you?" I asked. "So far two to three nights. Why?" He questioned. "I have to get back to my house and roommate or they'll kill me for not doing chores!" I told him. I grabbed my phone and looked at it. Five unread text messages from (b/f/n). I read them. It was ,'hey where are you? You alive? Hey, I need you back here tomorrow. Why didn't you show up??? Start packing your stuff when you come back.' "What? Am I being kicked out?' I texted back. 'No I'm moving out and away. Better job.' They finished. "I...have to go..." I said standing up. "Wait, what? Why?" Remus was now scared. "I have to pack all my stuff... my roomies movin' and I can't keep the place..." I told him. "Then pack it and I'll have Thomas pick it up." He said with the biggest smile. "Why would he pick it up?" I asked. "Well, you'll stay with me!" He stated as though it was obvious. "Really?" I felt stupid for asking. "Yes!" He picked me up and swung me around in a hug. I kissed him, saying thanks and then left to pack what little of stuff I had. A couple days later Thomas came over and picked up my stuff taking both it and me with him. "So, you're moving in with Remus?" Thomas asked. "Yeah I'm really exited! I'm hoping that one day we all can hang out one day." I told him. I was truly happy. "Well I know one thing is Remus did something so no one can hang out with him today." Thomas said pulling into the driveway. I could tell he was hiding something. "Why? What happened?" I asked. "Well..." He said opening the door. All the sides rushed out and grabbed boxes bringing them in and Remus was standing in front of me. "Care for a walk?" He asked putting his arm out. I took it. "What is this?" I asked. He looked at me and smiled. "Roman said it's called a date. I got the others to take your stuff to my room so I may take you one one." I was surprised by this. He started walking away from the house. "So where are we going?" I asked. "Well we are going to the woods. I do love them." He told me. "Oh no! Do you plan to murder me?" I joked. He laughed. "Why yes my dear! I will make your face go a crimson red with kisses!" I giggled. "That would be perfect." I told him. 10/2/19 CHAPTER 17 He took me into the woods and I remembered them, and not just from walking to them so much. This was the first place we had ever actually ever been since the Rose fell off. He took me to the middle of the woods and I was awestruck by what I was seeing. There where lights hanging up and it reminded me of something out of a fairy tale. I was to busy looking around to notice Remus had put on a song. Soon enough he took me into his arms and started dancing. I soon realized it was Tale as old as Time, from Beauty and the Beast. We danced and danced till the night came and the lights came to life. "Remus, this is perfect." I told him. "Well I had to get a certain snake out of my butt so I could do this." He said laughing. "Thank you." I said before kissing him. He kissed back and continued to dance. So we were sitting and talking. He finally asked once more. "You once told me that... you knew what it was like to be in my position... and you never told me how you knew. I just want to know if you are comfortable to tell me now." He whispered, but it was loud enough so I could hear it. "I still haven't told Thomas, but I will tell you." I looked straight at him and started."I grew up a happy child, but I rarely had good friends, and when I did, they would find someone better and leave. I only had two friends that ever stayed, so it was mostly me and them. Soon enough one of them moved and it was just (b/f/n) and me. In high school I tried a lot and each thing I tried I was kicked out or quite due to the people in it. They were always so cruel. In tenth grade a boy found my key chain, the Rose. By then everyone knew my crazy story of the Rose. He soon dated me and I thought I loved him... but I was wrong. He abused me, physically and mentally... he would leave in the mornings and nights to go see other women and I was left at the house.I wasn't allowed to leave unless told too. Soon enough he went to jail and (b/f/n) took me in. I've stayed with them for close to five years. I've been trying to recover, but it's hard, so I try to hide it." I told him. He looked at me and his face said it all. It was of shock, horror, and things I'd never seen from him. "Is that why you were so scared of Roman hitting you? Is that why you didn't tell me sooner? Is that why you're friend sent you away when they were mad that day so long ago?" He asked. I nodded to all of them and looked away. He soon grabbed my chin and made me look at him."You'r past doesn't define you, your future does." He told me with a smile. I gave a weak smile back and kissed him. He soon hugged me. "I love you." I told him. "I love you too." I was at the point of crying and I didn't know why. He knew I was going to start crying. "Tale as old as time, song as old as rhyme..." He started to sing. "Beauty and the stinky boooooooi." He finished making me laugh. He burst out into laughter and started to do different things to make me laugh. It was a perfect night. 10/3/19 Ok so one of the fans asked if they could be my friend on Wattpad, so I just have to say, you all are my family, friends, and are just the best! I love all of you and love to see what you have to say. You can feel free to text me to talk or ask a question or just have another friend. Honestly I need the social interaction. XD Anyways I hope you enjoyed the chapter and have a lovely night. CHAPTER 18 I woke up but didn't open my eyes. I could feel Remus playing with my hair and whispering something. I listened in to him. "I would never hurt you, I will only love you, and though I wont marry you because, well I can't handle the thought of marriage." I felt a bit saddened by this, but I continued to fake being asleep. "I will give you a ring, I'll hope you'll say yes to being my only love, because a forever lover is better then what you are now... but I have to wait." He finished. After a few minutes of him playing with my hair he shook me, gently, awake. "Hey, (y/n) wake up." I slowly lifter my head and realized we were still outside. "W-we're still outside?" I asked. "Yes we are. Do you wish to go back?" He asked. "No, I like it out here." I told him. I got off of him and stood up. "I am hungry though." I said. " Well I had that prepared as well... You see Thomas stopped by before you woke up and dropped off some food. After eating we were dancing again. I remembered what he had said. I wouldn't mind not being married as long as I'm with him. Soon he took me and had me spinning. When I had stopped and was facing him he was down on one knee. "(Y/N), I know we haven't been together for long, and please don't take this the wrong way, but I don't want to marry you due to I can't handle it, but I want to be with you for the rest of my life, so... will you be my forever lover?" He asked pulling out a ring that had a rose on it. I was stunned. My mouth was a gap and my eyes were filled with tears. "Forever and always." I say hugging him. Remus burst threw the door with me in hand. "(Y/N) SAID YES!" He announced. The others did their own things to say congratulations and Remus and me said our thanks. We all celebrated and even though it wasn't marriage like my parents or grandparents, it was still the best thing to happen. Remus was off talking to his brother and they were laughing. Logan came over and started talking to me. "You actually tamed his beast, you're the first and only one to do that." I smiled knowing that's his way of saying 'thanks for everything you've done to keep him at bay'. "No problem Logan." Logan soon walked off to talk to Thomas leaving Patton to come over to me. "My little child is growing up and falling in love!" He said giving me a bear hug. "Thank's Dad." I hugged back. "What's next? The dirty??? Please not the dirty!" I laughed as Patton was freaking out. "No Dad, I will still be taking showers and being clean." I told him. He calmed down. "Oh thank the puppies..." He said. "Well I'll let you get to what you were doing. I need to talk to Logan." He told me before walking off. "You did it kid." I heard a voice behind me say. I turned and saw Deceit. "Oh hey Dee." I said. "You had him fall for you, you made him leave Thomas alone, you did the impossible." He said. "Good job." I smiled and looked at him. "Thank's slimy boi." I said punching his arm jokingly. "I'm not slimy..." He said a little upset. "I know just your nickname." I said walking off to Remus. "Keep doing what you're doing..." 10/4/19 CHAPTER 19 I kissed Remus and he just smiled. "I will love spending every moment with you." He told me. "I can't wait to see what the future holds for us." I giggled. "Well how should we fully celebrate?" Thomas asked. "We can play games and watch movie!" Remus said. It honestly surprised all of us, but me. "These games and movies you wish to play wouldn't b-" Roman was cut off by his brother." Beauty and the Beast and games like twister!" Remus said. "What ever you did to Remus I like it. Keep doing it (y/n)!" Patton said. Remus looked down. "Well I let him talk about his ideas and do different things with him so long as he acts appropriate with you guys. Other than that I love how he is. How his face lights up when he's talking and drawing his ideas and turning them into stuffed animals and everything. It's amazing what his mind comes up with." I started rambling about what I loved about Remus. Virgil was the one who stopped me."UHG! WHY WOULD YOU, SOME ONE SOOOOO NICE AND INNOCENT, WANT A MONSTER LIKE HIM?!" Virgil's voice boomed threw the whole room. I was taken aback and Remus held me now knowing my past. "Why did Belle fall for the beast?" Remus asked him. "I want the answer from (y/n), not you." Virgil snapped his head back to me. "You want to know why I love him? It's because I've been where he's been... alone, forgotten, yelled at, told I'm not wanted and am hated, I've put on a fake smile for the past ten years. I've been threw more then him as well! He knows and cares about my limits and I trust him to never hurt me!" At this point I was ready to cry. Virgil up and left and I ran to the bathroom. I shut the door and sat on the toilet before I started to cry. I curled up and let what I couldn't hold in, out. I heard a knock on the door, but all I could get out was a quite and unnoticeable go away. Remus came in anyways and started rubbing my back to calm me down. I heard someone tell Roman to go talk to Virgil, but I didn't know who it was. "Hey, I'm right here..." Remus said. I hugged him with such force we both came close to falling. "Shhhhh... it's alright. I've got you now." He whispered to me. Soon enough he started to sing my favorite song from Beauty and the Beast. I started singing too. We both stood up once I stopped crying and he put his hand to my cheek and gently rubbed it with his thumb. With one hand I held his hand to my cheek and with the other I placed on his wrist. He pulled me in and kissed me. We soon went back down stairs and we started playing Twister. "Left foot red!" Thomas called. "OUH!" I heard Roman fall."Looks like the Roman empire has fallen!" Remus said laughing. "Why would you kick me there of all places?" Roman asked his brother. "It was left foot red! What else was I suppose to do?" Roman got up and started laughing. "The Roman empire has fallen... Nice one." He said."But there will be pay back!" Remus chuckled at his brothers last remark. "Right hand blue!" Soon people were falling. Patton was first, then came Logan and when he came down he was laughing, I saw Patton smile at this. It was me and Remus left now. It would be a battle to see who stayed up the longest. 10/7/19 CHAPTER 20 "Right foot green!" I put my foot close to me as possibly as to not fall. "Left hand yellow!" Remus was on top of me and he had the biggest grin. "You drop on me and I'll punch you!" I told him joking around. "Left foot blue!" Thomas kept calling out what colours we had to be on. After a few minutes I was above Remus and was having trouble staying up. My arms started shaking."You know I'm gonna win. Might as well just fall." He said. I knew he was joking but I was determined to prove him wrong. "N-no! I'm gonna b-beat you and wi-win!" My arms were about to give out if I stayed like this for another moment and my legs were slipping. Remus must have seen this because when Thomas called out the colour Remus 'fell'. "I win? I win!" I was to exited to realize my arms finally gave out and I had fallen on top of Remus. "I've seen this before." He purred. I got up blushing."So how about the movie?" I asked. Patton jumped up putting the movie in. "I'll make some popcorn." Logan said getting up. After he got back, he handed us all bowels of popcorn and we started watching the movie. We sang every song and we joked and made comments about the movie. At one point Logan started pointing out all of the economic flaws. After three movies Patton had fallen asleep with his head on Logan. It was cute, but Patton had done it to all of us at one point. "Well, I guess I'll go check on Virgil... Congrats again on getting a perfect person to love you." Roman said before leaving. I saw Remus smile. I knew he was happy that his brother was actually happy for him. "I am NOT leaving so HELLO." Deceit said sinking out. "Night Deceit!" I called. I looked over at Thomas and he was passed out. "I'm taking Patton to bed then going to bed myself. Just put Thomas on the couch and throw a blanket on him. I don't trust you,Remus, and you, (y/n), aren't strong enough." Logan said sinking down. After we put Thomas on the couch we sank down. We didn't go to is room,but we were in the hall. "Can I show you around?" Remus asked. "Well, I'll be staying here so I would love too!"I said taking his hand. He started walking down the hall way and away from his room. We passed a yellow door."That's Double D's room." After that there was a red one, then a dark blue, light blue, purple, orange, and he stopped telling me who's rooms they were when we cam up to a large door. "You'll love this." He said taking me in. It was a large library. "So this is where Logan gets all his books..." Remus laughed at my thought. "No, this is where all Thomas' memories are stored." He went over to a date and opened the book. Suddenly we were there, seeing how Thomas met me for the first time. "I love watching this because you don't even know how you will fall in love, even when I fall for you over and over again..." He told me. I thought it was sweat, and then he finished. "Into a pool of blood and fingers!" He said happily. I smiled knowing that he was just being him. After we went into where I fell for him and we saw how our love had bloomed. 10/9/19 CHAPTER 21 We were laughing and having fun when Roman opened the door making everything disappear. "(Y/N) I need your help with Virgil, please."Roman was out of breath. "What's wrong?" I asked him. He couldn't form proper words, but I decided either way I would help. "Remus, I have to go." I told him. He looked down with sadness in his eyes. I had him look at me. "Hey, I just want to have everyone accept you and me being a thing... that's all." I told him. He finally looked me in the eyes. "I understand... just... I don't want to lose you in any way..." I smiled at him and gave him a kiss. "You will never lose me... I'll be back, I promise." I told him, soon running to Roman. "Let's go." I said and Roman lead the way. With each twist and turn of the hall we made it to an open room filled with thing that didn't look real. "This is the dream room... it's where one of us, but mostly me, take over and give Thomas his dreams. There is a room that contains his dreams and nightmares... That's where Virgil is..." Roman explained. I started to take a step in, but Roman grabbed me. "What?" I asked. "You could have fallen in to the lake of dreams... if you fell in there you would have had to get past three of Thomas' dreams, each getting worse by the end, just to get out." He told me. "Then how do we get over to Virgil?" Roman started looking around. "Ok so the bridge is gone, but do you trust me?" He asked. "As of you being my friend, yes..." I looked at him some what scared. "Close your eyes and imagine your best and most amazing dream then walk over to the way I tell you." He told me. "Are you crazy? You told me I'd fall in!" I was starting to panic. He grabbed a hold of me."It only works if you are awake. You will be sleep walking over it. That's why you have to trust me." He told me. I soon calmed down and did as he told me. As I was getting close to it my dream turned to a nightmare. My eyes opened and I was filled with panic. My body started falling threw the water. Right before I went under a hand latched on to mine. I was soon pulled out and I coughed up some water. "T-thank you..." I said to who ever helped me. I looked up and Virgil was there. "What were you thinking?" he asked me. "I was thinking of getting to you because I want to know what's going on and how I can help." I told him standing up. "Well you shouldn't..." He went back to what he was doing before. "Please, Virgil... what's wrong? everyone is worried..." I told him. "You really want to know?" His voice boomed throughout the room. "Yes because I care and if I didn't I wouldn't have risked coming, or helped princey." I told him. That had seemed to be good enough for him. "Fine..." His voice was back to normal and he sat down and told me everything. "That's why you don't like him? I'm sorry... but he's changed... I promise." I gave a reassuring smile to him. "I just don't want the others to be hurt by him like I was... I don't want someone I find like family to be hurt like him..." He said looking away. "He wont hurt anyone while I'm here. Ok? Now how do we get out of here?" I asked. "Wait... I...I'm sorry, but I need your help with something..." He told me. 10/14/19 CHAPTER 22 "Ok what's up?" I asked. Virgil looked down and had a slight blush on his cheeks. "I like, like princey, but... what if he doesn't like me like that? What if he hates me? What if-" I cut Virgil off before he can finish. "Hey, I know you are anxiety and all, but breath. I'll help you out, ok?" He nodded his head and let out a breath I don't think he knew he was holding. "Now... Come one lets get out of here." I said which lead us both to leave. "I'm gonna talk to Remus and Roman ok? I wont tell Roman, but I do have a plan so don't worry." Virgil gave me a smile and said his thanks before walking off. I went back to Roman and told him what happened. "Thank god panic at the everywhere is ok!" He examined. "Why do you call him that?" I asked him. He looked sheepishly down. "If I tell you this you can't tell anyone got it?" He asked. I nodded. "I really, really,really like him... yes I was a jerk in the past, but I have fallen for him..." He told me. "The ask him out." He looked at me with a face of fear. "I can't! He hates me!" I just nodded saying, "If you say so..." I then walked back to Remus. He ran over and hugged me. "I missed you!" I hugged him back. "I missed you too." I pulled back from him."Do you think you might want to help me get two people together?" I asked with a smirk. "I prefer tearing people apart, but if you wish to bring someone together I will help you." He said with a smile. "Ok, now here's the plan..." Me and Remus had just finished setting everything up. The notes were slipped under the doors of Virgil and Roman, the books of past memories were placed in order to be opened, and the last part was dancing to Sally and Jack's song. Remus and I were hiding as the two came out of their rooms and headed for the library. We followed them, but made sure not to be caught. Roman soon bumped into Virgil."Hot topic! What are you doing here?" He asked. "I came because I was told too..." He said."O-oh... Hey, there's another note." Roman went and picked it up reading it out loud."Open these books in the order they are in. Well then."Roman said. Virgil went and opened the first book. The two went threw each book and soon came to an end. The two were smiling and laughing. "Man, Virgil, I forgot about all those fun times we had! I wish we had more of them..." Roman laughed. Virgil looked up. "Yeah Princey. Who knew you would hit on me all the time." Virgil looked down with a slight blush on him. "Yeah... a-about that... I..." Virgil cut Roman off before he could finish. "Roman I-I love you...." Virgil then realized what he said and started to leave. Roman grabbed his arm and brought Virgil back only to kiss him. "I love you too." Roman said after pulling back. Logan walked in and before the two could see I grabbed Logan and pulled him over to hide. I put a finger to my lips to signal to be quite. "Why?What's going on?" He whispered. "Me and Remus got Virgil and Roman together and they are kissing right now."I told him. He took a peek over at the two and turned back. "Well then. You two did well... Might I ask for your help then?" He asked. Remus and me looked at each other. "Patton?" We asked tuning back. 10/26/19 CHAPTER 23 "How did you know?" Logan asked us. "Dude it's obvious like how you wear glasses." I told him. "Well then. You know I'm not good with emotions and as you see I know a lot, but have no clue how to ask Patton out." He told us. We both nodded. "Well this will be easy." I said. "Logan, we will make sure you two will be happily together in no time. Trust us." I gave a smile to Logan. "I trust you... Remus doesn't have my full trust..." He told me. "Understandable." Remus said. After I told Logan our plan we went to bed. I was lying in bed when Remus sat up. "Why do we keep helping the others? They really have done nothing to help us." He said. "Because if we want to help them then they can be just as happy as us. Imagine never meeting me." I told him. "That is a worse thought than anything I could ever say or do..." He told me. I rolled over to face him. "That's why I want to help them." He looked down and finally understood. "Ok..." I kissed him and he lied down next to me pulling me in. "Goodnight my beauty.~" He whispered. "Good night my stinky boi." I said drifting off to sleep. We awoke and set the time for the visit for the animal shelter. We were sending Logan on a date with Patton to an animal shelter after breakfast. We made sure that Patton would not have an allergic reaction to the cats there. Logan made himself a cup of tea and sat down. Patton came hopping down and sat next to Logan. "Ah, Patton, good morning. Would you like to go to an animal shelter today?" Logan asked. Patton's face light up with happiness. "Really Logan?!" His smile made me smile. "Well yes. You are wanting to go right?" Logan asked. Patton nodded his head. "Great then it's a date." Patton's smile grew bigger. "That was you asking me out? Logie bear I've been waiting for to long!" Patton said hugging Logan. "Y-you have?" Logan asked. "Yeah! I've liked you for a long time now." Patton and Logan smiled and hugged. Logan looked back at us and mouthed a 'thank you'. We smiled and nodded. "See that feels good doesn't it? I asked Remus. "Yeah it does. Next time let's not tho." He said jokingly. I giggled. "Ok, well what do you want to do today?" I asked him. He looked down."Well, we could go watch a movie, or play a round of twister in b-" I stopped him. "A movie sounds fun. What movie?" I asked him. "We could do a horror movie..." He sounded disappointed by the fact I shut him down about his 'game'. "There is the It chapter 2 movie that came out." I told him. He smiled and nodded. "It's only in theaters though." I told him. "We can still go!" He was exited. "Ok, but I would suggest wearing normal close to go see it. I'd love to see you in something normal to tell if I hate it or love it more then your normal cloths." He smiled and went to change. I honestly didn't want him to be hurt by others words for the way he looked, but either way I loved him. He came out wearing a pair of jeans and a block shirt with green stripes. He came over to me and hooked my arm with his. "Let's go my love." He said. "Alright." I said giggling, and then we left for the movies. 10/26/19 CHAPTER 24 Remus and me had just gotten out from seeing the new It movie and were laughing. "I can't believe that made me jump and that twist at the end! Oh my- god...." My excitement turned into fear. "Well I can't blame you for not seeing that coming." Remus started laughing. I soon tugged on his arm. "C-can we please l-leave now?" I asked. He looked down and saw the terror in my face. "What's wrong?" He asked. I could tell he was truly worried. "I-I..." Soon enough some one grabbed me from behind. "Miss me?" He asked letting me go. "N-no... You can rot in hell for all I care D-Devin!" I went to grab Remus to leave, but Devin grabbed my wrist. "I thought you loved me!" He some what yelled. "(Y/N) who is he?" Remus had venom in his voice, but it wasn't towards me. "Devin... he's my ex..." Remus was furious. "Hands off of (y/n), they aren't yours..." He said gently grabbing me and walking off. Remus took me outside and sat me down on a near by bench. "Are you ok? Did he hurt you? I hope I didn't scare you, did I?" He asked. I simply hugged him and whispered, "I'm fine... Just lets leave please." He nodded. "I thought he was in jail?" Remus asked. I checked my phone seeing my friend had texted me twenty-five text all in panic. "(B/F/N) texted me during the movie to tell me he was let out..." I was scared, but I felt safe with Remus. We soon left and I thought we would be safe from then on. Sadly I was wrong. Devin had come up behind Remus and hit him in the head. Remus rubbed his head and turned around. "Now this is where the fun begins!" Remus had a smile of someone ready to kill. "Oh I'm not scared of you!" Devin started throwing punches. Remus found Devin growing tired so he took his chance. He put on a face that I couldn't see, but Devin was terrified. "P-please don't kill me..." Devin begged Remus. "Oh I'n not gonna kill you..." Remus started. "Oh thank you, thank you so m-" Remus stopped him. "I'm just going to hurt you, really,really bad." Devin was terrified of what would happen. Remus soon got his hands on a rabid raccoon. Remus had a wicked smile. "This is a rabid raccoon... He's going down your pants!" Remus shoved the raccoon down the front of Denis' pants causing Denis to scream and run around. Remus picked me up and ran back to the house. "Why did you do that?" I asked him. "Well I knew you would be mad if I killed him so that was off the list... and besides, the raccoon isn't rabid... I only said it was to give him a good scare." He gave me a smile. We soon go to the front door and he set me down before going in. "Thank you..." I told him. "You might have scared him off for good." I giggled. "Anything for you, Beauty..." He leaned down and kissed me. I would have been crazy not to kiss back so I did. His kisses always had some form of saliva that would always get on me, but I didn't care. I loved his wet sloppy kisses because they were real. He then took my hand and lead me inside. After Thomas said hi and we chit chatted, Remus and I went back to his room. "Hey Remus...let's have some fun tonight." I said which gave him a big smile. 10/28/19 CHAPTER 25   Warning: Cussing, fun, time skips, Remus, and of course a happy ending for all. :)              It was Halloween and the sides had dressed up in their costumes ready to go trick or treating. I went as Remus because him and the sides had chosen to do partner costumes, so why not make an excuse to wear his cloths? Thomas was  Spider-man, Deceit and Remus went as Georgie and Pennywise, Virgil and Roman was Jack and Sally, then Patton and Logan was the Cheshire cat and the white rabbit. "So we have everyone and everything, correct?" Thomas asked. "You forgot something..." Virgil said. "A bag! We need a bag for candy!" I chimed in. Logan held up a bag. "I have grabbed a few just in case." We all nodded and headed out. "So there is a Halloween party at midnight, right?" Patton asked. "Yeah my friend (b/f/n) is hosting it. There will be a contest and games!" I was excited. They came back to see all their old friends for Halloween and decided to throw a party. We all went to the first house and Thomas knocked."Trick-or-treat!" We all said when the man opened the door. "Aren't you all a little to old for this?" He asked in a rude tone. "You're never to old to have fun!" Roman snapped back. The man grew angry and shut the door. We kept walking though. He wouldn't ruin our night of fun. We all skipped over to the next house and received candy this time.          After we hit all the houses we went back to Thomas' house and pored out our candy. "I'll trade you a kit-kat for (y/f/c) (Your favorite candy.)" Remus said to Virgil. "Make it two." Virgil was making a tight deal. "Done!" Remus handed over his candy. "I will give my candy corn to anyone with out a trade!" Patton said. Patton never liked candy corn and no one knew why. It was odd for him to not like candy. "Hey call me weird, but I'll take it all!" I said knowing Remus loved the stuff. Everyone including Remus, which surprised me, gave me their candy corn. "Ok I will trade anything for (y/f/c), I'll even give you my leg!" Remus said as he took off one of his legs. Patton and Virgil started freaking out causing Thomas to panic. "Remus, babe, please put your leg on." I looked at him and he smiled. "As you wish." He put his leg back on. It ended with Logan just taking all the healthy stuff we all got, Patton got the rest of Logan's, but Logan told him not to eat it all in one month like last time, Deceit kept all his, Virgil got all the sour candies and hard to chew candies, then Roman got the chocolates and any other thing that had chocolate on it, Thomas had a mix of candy, but mostly his favorite candies were in it, Remus got all my favorite candy before I could get any, but I had all of the candy corn. I was mostly planing to give it to him.         We all went back to our rooms to relax for a while before the party started. "Hey, baby cakes..." I turned to see Remus holding out his bag of candy. "What's this?" I asked. "It's your favorite candy, silly!" He said merrily. I giggled handing him the candy I got for him. "You know I would kiss you, but I don't want to mess up your make-up." I told him. He didn't care and started to kiss me. We pulled back."Your make-up is messed up..." I said sadly. "I can fix it before we leave again, just like how you can was it off later."He went and started kissing me again. Soon one kiss turned into a make out session. I soon pulled back and checked the time. "Ok... we need to fix out make-up cus we'll have to leave soon." I told him. He kissed me one more time and got up going to the bathroom. I followed and saw how the make-up affected my face. I cleaned my face after laughing and fixed up my make-up. I looked over at Remus who was applying more lip stick. "You ready?" I asked him. He nodded and we meet up with the others.         We were all at the party now. Patton and Logan were talking, Thomas was talking to a guy, Roman and Virgil were dancing, somewhat. Remus was chit chatting with my friend, I was happy the two were getting along. As for me I was eating, there was honestly nothing better to do. I saw Remus look back at me and smile. I smiled back at which point he made sure his back was towards me. He pulled something out and showed (b/f/n) it. He slipped it back in and started talking to them, always taking a look over to me to me to see if I had moved. Soon enough I got up and joined them. "Hey! How's my favorite little friend?" (B/F/N) asked. "Well I'm having fun if that's what you mean." I laughed. "Hey we'll be starting some games here soon!" My friend told me. I gave a smile to them and everyone quieted down as Roman had asked them too. Virgil was in front of him, and he got down on one knee. "Virgil, my love... Will you be my dark and stormy night forever and marry me?" Roman asked pulling out a ring. Virgil slightly panicked, but said yes and hugged Roman. I watched the two kiss in happiness. I didn't see Remus turn his back on me and look at something. We ended that night with the most fun we've all had.         It was soon Christmas and everyone sat down to open presents. "Awwww you bought us all sweaters! I love mine, (y/n)!" Patton exclaimed. Virgil actually put his on and smiled. Deceit surprisingly got us all something. "They are well..." He started. "Friendship bracelets!" I put the one for me one and hugged him. "Thanks Dee! I love it!" Everyone else loved theirs two. Remus started pulling out a box that was tiny and had green wrapping paper out of his shirt, but Logan stopped everyone. "Patton, I believe you should open this one next. It's from me." He handed Patton the box and Patton opened it. Tears swelled in his eyes and a smile that was bigger then the rings on Jupiter. "What's in it?" Roman asked. "'Will you marry me Patton?' Oh Logie bear of course I will!" Patton hugged Logan and for someone who doesn't smile, Logan had a big smile on his face. I saw Remus put the box back in his shirt and look down in disappointment. We all celebrated for the now two happy couples. Remus pulled out more boxes for everyone, giving them all little stuffed animals.          It was two in the morning and I couldn't sleep. A million thoughts kept me awake. I got out of bed and started walking around the palace. My bare feet hit the cold ground as I went to the memories library. I scanned threw each book and found the one on where me and Remus first fell in love. I went to the next book and the next book and then I came upon the one from Halloween night. I watched it as Roman asked Virgil to marry him and that is when I saw Remus turn away. I looked closer at him and saw that he had a pain in his eyes. Then I remembered Christmas. Both of those times some one was asked to forge their love as one and become married. Did he think I would never want that? "What are you doing in here so late?" I heard a voice call from behind me. "Oh uh... I can't sleep..." I told them truthfully. I turned and saw Logan. "You should be getting at least eight or more hours of sleep. If something is troubling you to the point you can't sleep you can talk to me." He told me. "I'm fine, but thanks Logan." I gave a fake smile to him."I'm going to bed now." I told him. I gave him a quick hug and left for bed. I was there again, lying in Remus' bed, not being able to sleep. I didn't get any sleep that night causing me to pass out during a game.         It was now Valentine day. Remus asked to go on a walk with me and I agreed. "To the wood's we go then!" He smiled at me. There was no doubt I loved him. There was also no doubt that I knew something would happen. We walked in and he started his little talk. "You know I love you right? Do you remember how I said I would never marry?" He asked. I nodded my head. "Well I was going to do this on Hallow's eve, but then Roman and Virgil, then I was prepared to do it on Christmas, then Logan did it, so I'm asking you now..." He got down on one knee and held my hand. "There is only one thing I would change about you... and that's your last name." He said. He pulled out a ring and waited. He looked like he was expecting a no or a slap in the face, but I tackled him down with a hug and kisses. "Yes! I've waited too long to hear that!" I couldn't stop myself from kissing him, but it didn't matter because he kissed me back.         We all set our wedding dates the same. Halloween of that year. Logan did the normal tux and the others including myself put on a costume. Patton, Virgil, and I had linked arms to walk down the isle. Each step made Virgil panic, but Patton and I reassured him every thing would be grate. We each made it to our future husbands and listened to our vows. People clapped and cheered. Each of us kissed as was told too, none of us wanted to break apart. The flowers were tossed and Thomas caught one and my bestie caught two. I laughed at the sight of it. The one's who were wedded started the dancing. Remus glided me around and if I stepped on his toes he didn't care, just as long as he danced with me. Remus and I snuck out of the building and went to were the garden was. Roses were still in bloom surprisingly, and as I was looking at them Remus pulled something out. He pressed the play button and our song came on. "Might I have this dance Beauty?" He asked. I took his hand as Tale as old as Time played. "Only if you'll love me forever." I said slowly dancing with him. We swayed back and forth, he even picked me up to swing me. I felt as though this night could never end. we continued to dance in the moonlight and the song slowly came to an end. "Tale as old as time, song as old as rhyme. Beauty and~ the beast~"  The music started to stop just as we stopped dancing. "I will love you until the day I die, and even then I wont stop loving you." He said kissing me. I kissed him back and we stayed like that for a few minutes, almost never to pull apart. 10/29/19 Published on 10/31/19  pages: 5.3 words: 2028 This is the last chapter. I just want to say thank you to everyone who read this, loved this, hated this, and commented on this. I love all of you and can't wait to start writing my next book. I don't know what It will be, whether it's a sequal to this or a new book entirely. I hope you enjoyed this chapter, this book, and everything in between. I love you all and have a lovely night. (I put together each chapter so that others may read the whole book if they wish, I love you all, I hope to write more for you guys soon. I love you and have a lovely night!)

#romance #fanfiction #remus #remus sanders #remus x reader #remus sanders x reader #sanders sides #sanders sides x reader #the end #beauty and the stinky boi

[winryofresembool]

EdWin one-shot: A Food Fight (of sorts)

Summary: Ed and Winry are preparing to move in together a bit before their wedding, but of course things don’t go like planned. (could be canon ‘verse or whatever universe you want!)

A/N: my part of the fic-art trade with @mavistuffz! I was planning to finish this way earlier but sometimes life and writer’s block happens :/ Either way, I really hope you’ll enjoy this! It’s probably not quite what you had in mind, but hey, it’s EdWin, so that’s the main thing, right? :’) Let me know what you think!

Words: 2900+ (hey, at least it’s p long?)

Genre: fluff

Warnings: swearing and some sexual implications, I guess (nothing bad tho)

Ed and Winry had only one month left till their wedding, and that meant a lot needed to be done before the big day. The quests had been invited, dresses and suits bought, the venue and the theme colors chosen (to Ed’s surprise, Winry had even allowed a little bit of black in the decorations because it had been his wish), but that didn’t mean they were anywhere near done.

Perhaps one of the biggest tasks they needed to do before the wedding was moving into their own house. It had been decided they’d move to Rush Valley after returning their honeymoon, which meant their new home needed to be organized before the wedding. That only added pressure for the bride and groom who had been stressed even before the moving.

They had found a nice small place near Garfiel’s, something Winry was happy about despite her teacher’s playful accusations that one day she’d open her own automail shop and steal all his customers. While Winry was dreaming about opening her own shop at some point, she had a secret she had only told Ed so far, a secret that would affect her professional career quite a bit. That’s why she was perfectly happy to work with Garfiel until she was financially stable to start her own business. Ed would still continue doing his research, and he had also received an interesting offer from General Mustang. He had suggested Ed become an alchemy teacher in a nearby university that had been opened recently. The young man had been a bit reluctant, reminding Roy he couldn’t even perform alchemy anymore, but afterwards he had told Winry he might consider it. That way he could spread important information that could help them avoid the misuse of alchemy in the future.

The couple finished carrying the last pieces of furniture (Winry only carrying light clothes boxes because of her condition) and decided to take a breather before starting to organize the smaller objects into their shelves. They had decided to start with the kitchenware because they were planning to spend the night in their new home and cook something for their helpers, Al, Garfiel and Paninya.

“Whew, I thought we’d never get it finished,” Ed swept sweat from his forehead and took a couple of steps back to see the final results of his work.

“Can you believe it? Our first home together,” Winry marveled as she watched the view from the kitchen.

Ed walked right behind her and wrapped his arms around her belly. “Well, technically we have been living together for quite a while now…”

“You know what I mean,” Winry remarked. “This isn’t my granny’s place, this is yours, mine and the baby’s.”

When Winry said the last word, Ed’s hand automatically sought the still non-existent bump and rubbed it lightly through her shirt.

“Do you think she will be angry?” Ed asked worriedly.

“About the baby? She’ll probably say something like ‘you damn kids start way too early these days’ and then congratulate us. I’m pretty sure she and my grandfather weren’t married yet when they had my father…”

“The old hag is something else,” Ed snorted. “Remember what Dominic told us about her?”

“Hey, this is my granny we are talking about! Please have some respect, she let you live under her roof!” Winry reminded him and slapped his hands away from her belly.

“And while there, I also got her granddaughter pregnant,” Ed laughed and earned an elbow on his ribcage.

“Ouch!”

“Sometimes I don’t know what I see in you.” Winry shook her head and turned to stare at her fiancé judgingly.

“That’s too bad because I do recall you promising to give 85 per cent of your life to me.” Ed smirked at her smugly, and she stuck her tongue out at him.

“I might still change my mind about that, Mr. Elric.”

“Nah, you wouldn’t, future Mrs. Elric.”

“Oh, about the name…” Winry seemed to taste the word with her tongue, “how would you feel if I changed my last name to Rockbell-Elric instead?”

“That sounds good to me.” Ed nodded. “I know you are proud to be a Rockbell.”

“I am. But I’m also glad you have your mother’s last name because Rockbell-Hohenheim would be a monster to say.”

“I won’t disagree with you on that. Anyway, should we start organizing the kitchen?” Ed asked. “The others might come any minute now…”

“Sure thing. I’ll carry the dry foods here, you can set them where they belong.”

The work progressed rather peacefully, until…

“What?” Winry yelled suddenly. “The chocolate doesn’t need to be in the ice box! Why would you put it in there anyway? I was planning to eat it soon because the Truth knows I’m in need of something with a lot of sugar and fat right now.”

“Oh, here we go with the cravings…” Ed mumbled under his breath, but unfortunately for him, Winry heard him.

“Excuse you, mister, I would like to see you carry a child for 9 months and see how much chocolate you want to eat!”

“Relax, Winry, I didn’t mean… I was just going to put it in there because it’s hot outside and you really don’t want it to melt, do you?”

“Fine, then… just don’t make that mistake again!”

“I won’t!” Ed promised quickly, knowing it was dangerous to fight with Winry right now.

The couple continued to fill the shelves and closets, but it wasn’t calm for long.

“Did you… did you buy blue cheese even though you know how much I hate it?” Ed nearly screamed when he opened the ice box again. “It’s even grosser than the milk it’s been made of! It has fucking mold on it!”

“Oh, I’m sorry. I try to remember that the next time we go do some grocery shopping. The same way you hopefully remember to not buy pickles! Even the smell of those things makes me throw up, Edward!”

“You never told me that!” he claimed. “Of course I wouldn’t have bought them if I had known!”

It was a half-truth; now that he thought of it, Winry might have mentioned something about pickles earlier, but he hadn’t remembered. If he had, there was no way he would have bought them.

“I most certainly did!” Winry argued. “Do you remember when I got sick the other day after seeing your sandwich? It was because it had pickles on it. And I remember clearly saying: ‘don’t ever eat those again near me’! You just never listen!”

“I do listen! It’s just, when you go ‘don’t do this, don’t do that’ all day, every day, some things are just easy to forget!”

“You know what, Edward? Fuck you. I really really don’t know why I’m gonna have a wedding with you in a month.” “Winry! I’m sor…”

Ed didn’t get to finish his apology before Winry marched out of the room, slamming the door angrily behind her.

“Oh, great,” Ed growled to himself. “I screwed it up again. Just when we were supposed to move in here too…”

Ed didn’t get to fume alone for a long while, because Al and Paninya chose that moment to return from their break.

“Why do you look so murderous? Not that you don’t always look a little bit scary, but isn’t this supposed to be a happy day?” Al asked, raising his eyebrow questioningly.

“If there was a moment when I wished I’d be able to hit myself, that would be now,” Ed stated, making the other two glance at each other with confusion.

“OK?” Al tried to get his brother to elaborate a bit.

“I got her mad again,” Ed said after a while. “And in the worst possible moment too. I know she’s been particularly sensitive lately, yet I couldn’t stop in time…”

“What do you mean when you say she’s been particularly sensitive lately? Is there any specific reason for that?” Paninya had become good at reading other people’s emotions and she could sense Ed was hiding something from her. He turned away from the other two, running his hand through his hair in frustration.

“I… uh… you guys weren’t supposed to know yet… she wanted to tell you herself. Oh man, she’s really gonna kill me when she finds out…”

“Brother? Could you please talk like a normal human being? I don’t understand a word you said.”

“I shouldn’t tell you!” he tried one more time, even though he knew he had already lost this battle.

“Wait a second…” Paninya had a moment of realization. “You said she’s been sensitive lately… she’s been spending a lot of time in the toilet, and… you guys didn’t tell us what you are going to do with that spare room… She’s pregnant, isn’t she?”

“I… Fine… Yes, she is.” Ed stuttered, seeing it was too late to deny it anymore.

“Way to go, guys!” Pan exclaimed and smacked Ed on his shoulder in a friendly manner. “Although, I admit I didn’t think you’d have it in you. Usually you blush when she’s simply in the same room with you. I gotta talk to her as soon as possible! But you, mister,” she pointed at Ed, “You need to talk to her first. I remember hearing something about a stupid argument earlier, and I won’t let you get away with it that easily. Go make it right. That’s what she’d tell me if I was in your situation.”

“I guess you’re right,” Ed sighed. “Why does it have to be so damn hard, though? Hey, Al?” Al hadn’t gotten a chance to say anything yet, he was just standing there, looking dumbfounded.

“You’re having… a baby? I’m… gonna become an uncle?”

“Yes,” Ed said carefully, scared of an explosion even though he should have known Al would never react like that.

“That’s… that’s so amazing, brother! I’m so happy for you!” the younger brother suddenly exclaimed and rushed to hug Ed.

“Take it easy, Al,” he tried to calm him down, although he was secretly very happy and relieved about his reaction. “I can’t breathe!”

When Al finally let go of him, he got an idea.

“Hey, before I go to talk to her… There’s something we could do.”

Ed dragged Al to a grocery store, and when they got to one of Ed’s favorite sections, he asked:

“Which flavor do you think she’d like? Nuts? Salt? Berries? Just regular?”

“Shouldn’t you be the one to know that?” Al asked back. “You’re the one who’s gonna get married to her.”

“Shut up, Al. Oh, look! There are even skeleton shaped ones! These are so cool!”

“Edward,” Al said with a warning tone, “remember that you are buying them for her, not for you. She would not like that.”

“Fine. What would you suggest then?”

“I say you should try to make them special. Something she can’t buy from this store. Hey,” he pointed at one shelf, “there are molds there! Look at this, don’t you think she’d like this?”

  After buying the products for preparing the special gift, Ed and Al told Paninya to go and distract Winry while they’d be working in the kitchen. She was still sulking upstairs, and the boys didn’t want her to come down before they were finished with their work. Paninya agreed after hearing the brothers’ plan and climbed the stairs to the bedroom, stopping to knock the door.

“Who is it? Ed, if it’s you, I swear to Truth I’m in no mood to…”

“No, it’s me, Pan.” The dark-haired young woman said calmly.

“I guess come in then,” Winry replied. Paninya wondered if she had heard a bit of disappointment in her voice.

“I heard what happened,” she said. “You know, I don’t usually defend your idiot of a boyfriend, but he really is sorry.”

“If you came here to talk for him…”

“No, I came here because you’re my friend and of course I’m worried about you.”

“OK.” Winry calmed down and sat down on the bed, folding her arms on her lap.

“Uh, please don’t get mad,” Pan said after trying to decide how to tell her the news, “but… he accidentally revealed your secret. Or rather, I guessed it when he said some weird things.”

“Oh great. That idiot. I really didn’t want you to find out that way,” Winry sighed, understanding Paninya must have talked about her pregnancy. “I was supposed to tell you soon…”

“It doesn’t matter, Winry! I’m happy for you, I really am! It’s just, you guys seem to get into a fight over smallest things, and what if… what if it gets out of control and one of you says something you can’t fix?”

“Trust me, that thought has crossed my mind a few times. But don’t worry, at the end of the day, we still love each other. He may be an idiot, but… he’s still my idiot. And besides,” Winry blushed fiercely, “afterwards, making up is always fun.”

“That’s too much information, Win!”

“OK, OK, sorry. But it’s not just the sex, he’s always super sweet and thoughtful after a fight. Sometimes he cooks something good, and once he even let me use his favorite leather jacket… You know how he loves that thing.”

“Wow. Sounds like you have him totally wrapped around your finger.”

“Even though I hate to admit it at the moment, he does that same to me,” Winry’s face got even redder. “There’s a reason why I’m marrying him, after all. But what is taking him this long?” She suddenly got worried. “Usually he comes to find me a lot faster…”

“He’s… busy doing something.” Paninya said carefully, not wanting to reveal the secret Ed was preparing.

“OK. He’d better do it fast, though,” Winry complained. “I’m getting really hungry here.”

“You have already forgiven him, though, haven’t you?”

“When you are fighting with him as much as I am, you kinda have to learn to do it fast.” Winry smiled.

“You seem to enjoy the fighting, am I right?”

“I guess you are. I wouldn’t be able to be with someone who never challenges me.”

“Aww. Then you are definitely marrying the right person.”

“Hey! Only I have the right to insult him!” Winry exclaimed, pretending to be angry, but soon burst into laughter.

The girls changed the subject and started talking about baby related things, like the baby’s sex and name suggestions. At some point Al peeked into the bedroom and told Paninya Ed and he were ready.

“Where are you taking me?” Winry tried to pry when Al came in and tied a scarf around her head, so she couldn’t see what was happening around her.

“It’s a surprise. That’s why there’s a blindfold,” Al said and spun Winry around a couple of times so she wouldn’t be able to figure out their direction too easily.

“I don’t like surprises,” Winry tried to protest but followed Al when he dragged her forward.

“Are we there yet?” she asked impatiently when her future brother-in-law seemed to take her in and out of a lot of rooms.

“Soon, Winry, soon.”

They stepped into a room that had been empty before the fight because the couple had agreed that they still had plenty of time to organize it. When Al took the scarf off from Winry’s face, she didn’t recognize the space at first. There was a chest of drawers for the baby’s clothes Pinako had given for the couple (not knowing they’d be using it for this purpose, however), a shelf for toys and other things (a surprisingly cute dragon plush already sitting there), a table for changing the diapers, and…

“A crib?” Winry asked aloud when she saw the object she didn’t remember seeing earlier. “When did you have time to get this?”

“Just a little while ago… You know, Al helped a bit…” Ed said, referring to his alchemy. “But I added some things of my own in there. And I would have added more but Al didn’t let me.” Al rolled his eyes at his brother, knowing he had wanted to make the crib black and add some spikes and gargoyles here and there. He’d have to hide Ed’s drawing from Winry…

Winry pulled the blanket on the crib away and saw a huge bowl in there. And the bowl was full of…

“Chocolate wrenches!”

“If you want to throw me with them… go ahead.”

“No way!” Winry said and took one chocolate wrench into her hand excitedly. “I’m going to eat this right away!”

As she munched happily, Ed said: “I’m sorry about earlier. I know this moving in and the wedding and now the baby too have been stressing you… I shouldn’t be the one to add you even more stress. And I promise to listen to you more often now. By the way, I threw all the pickles away too.”

“That’s good. I shouldn’t have nagged you about the chocolate either. And you don’t have to eat the blue cheese if you don’t want to.”

“You know I don’t,” Ed snorted and went to hug his soon-to-be-wife.

“We’re a pair of idiots, aren’t we?” Winry murmured when she snuggled her head against his shoulder.

“I guess we are. Hey, we’re not skipping our favorite part of making up, though?” he whispered, trying to make sure Al and Paninya weren’t hearing.

“You give me some real food first, and we’ll see what happens after that,” Winry said with amusement, intertwining their fingers.

“It’s a deal.”

A/N: In case you missed it, I drew a picture of Ed’s version of the crib. Check it out!

#edwin #edward elric #winry rockbell #my fics #fullmetal alchemist #mavistuffz

[femmeveined-a]

📱 rachel & vic oof

📱( Accepting! )

RACHEL

May 7th, 2010

Rachel sprawled out on her bed, the night’s events turning over in her head as the sun rose over the trees. The concert had been the first time she and Chloe had really gotten close since they called a truce on their dislike of each other. Chloe already knew more about her than the kids at Blackwell, who only knew Rachel as whoever Rachel wanted them to think she was. Running into Chloe at the Old Mill had been completely out of Rachel’s control, and she couldn’t decide if she loved it or hated it. Groping at her sheets for a minute, her fingers grasped her phone, and she looked out the window as she tried to figure out what to say.

4:26 AM: i’m so amped up from last night i can’t sleep. would‘ve hella sucked without you, glad you decided i was cool enough to hang with, finally.

She weighed her options, mouth screwing up into a pucker. She’d flirted with Chloe all night, even over text after they’d parted ways. But she had to mix it up, keep it interesting. Deleting the text in seconds, she opened Instagram, posting the best picture she could find from the previous night, with the caption, “Firewalk with me ;)”

July 24th, 2011

Rachel jumped a mile when her phone vibrated, earning a sidelong glance from Frank. “Is that Chloe? Rachel, she has to know by now. Where did you even tell her you were going today?”

Rachel swiveled the driver’s side chair and jumped up to put Pompidou on his leash. “I told her I was in Seaside. Which we are. I just… Didn’t mention we were taking your RV. Or that ‘we’ involved you. I even sent her a postcard, I thought she’d chill, but–”

“Chill? Chloe Price?”

“Frankie, stop.” Rachel laughed, rolling her eyes. “She’s not… Okay, she’s a little much. But you have to love her.”

“No I do not.” Frank looked downright offended at the suggestion, and Rachel sighed, raking her fingers through her hair.

“Fine. I do. And I know she won’t like it, and it’ll just start bullshit drama. Not really our style. And I like our style.” Rachel leveled her gaze at him, the way she knew could get her her way any time she wanted.

Frank held her gaze for a long minute, before tossing her her phone. “Just text her. Tell her you’re okay. She goes nuts when she doesn’t hear from you, y’know.”

Rachel considered it for a minute, telling Chloe everything. About Frank, about how she’s really in love, and how happy she is. Holding Pompidou’s leash between her knees, she types it out, just to see it in writing.

1:56 PM: hey babe. i’m in seaside, remember? buuuuuut… i didn’t tell you who with. it’s frank. y’know. that frank. we’ve been hanging out for a while, and uh… now we’re kind of hooking up. and i think he loves me. and i think i love him. maybe. idk. but i love you too. and idk what to do. it’s scary but i don’t wanna lose you, or him. not as friends, or… anything else.

Rachel only realized she was gritting her teeth when the headache started, and she pressed delete, holding it down for a solid minute after the words vanished. Like hell am I ruining today like this. 

March 8th, 2012

Rachel had never felt grosser. She’d known David was a creep from the start, but when she’d caught him tailing her in his shitty car, taking her picture by Frank’s, and on campus, she went into damage control mode. Cut Frank off by starting a fight and leaving him a letter goodbye, and distanced herself from the Vortex Club and Nathan. There was only one link left to get David off her back.

Chloe.

Her fingers shook slightly as she typed out the text, a lump in her throat.

9:17 PM: hey. sorry it’s been a few days of silence. needed space, y’know? but i need more. a lot more. i have school stuff to work on since the semester’s almost over, so things will be hella crazy for me and i just won’t have time for a social life. we should-

Her typing stopped as a new message popped up from Chloe, as if she’d known what was happening.

9:17 PM: holy shit dude, v just told me stepdick is stalking you. that SUCKS. he’s such an asshole. i can get him off your back. cause mischief, you know, my usual. just say the word.

Rachel smiled softly, her chest feeling a little lighter, as she deleted her previous message in the making.

January 16th, 2013

For nearly the last year, Chloe and Rachel had been closer than ever, even more so than before her secret relationship with Frank put a rift between them. Initially, when Mark Jefferson had been chosen to teach at Arcadia Bay, Rachel had only thought of her future. Sure, she had some professional shots in her modeling portfolio, but Mark was a known, celebrated photographer. She’d been subtle at the start, a stark contrast from the fan girls that drooled over him and whined for his attention. Asking him for advice on her portfolio or assignments for class, casually asking if he could maybe do a small shoot for her.

It was almost too easy for that to blur into what it was now, sneaking back to the dorms after a scandalous hookup in his office that had become their routine. She fished her phone from her bag to read the long list of texts Chloe had sent her over the last two hours, chuckling and shaking her head. She’d tried to write it all out, to tell Chloe about him. But it never felt like the right time. And Chloe would lose her shit anyways, no matter when she told her.

6:23 PM: hey blue. i’m fine, sorry i went quiet. i was kinnnnnnd of with someone. but i need to tell you in person. bc it’s sort of… taboo. like, hella taboo. pick me up and we can-

A hand on her shoulder elicited a horror movie scream that echoed off the brick walls lining the sidewalk. Beside her, Nathan jumped back like he’s been shocked, hands raised in defense. “Shit! Sorry, Rach! I just, I just saw you come out of the main building and I just…”

His words trailed off as he looked at something behind her, and Rachel followed his gaze, neck craning to look without turning. Mark was half-jogging down the stairs, briefcase in hand. He gave her and Nathan a curt nod before heading to his car, and Rachel turned back to Nathan, who’s expression had visibly darkened. “Uh, you good, Nate? He give you a shit grade or something?”

“Or… Something.”

April 21st, 2013

Something was very, very wrong. Sure, Rachel had taken some shit, and drank a little. But she could hold her own. A little weed and molly didn’t leave her stumbling like Bambi learning to walk, head spinning, and her stomach lurching. The flashing lights of the party stung her eyes and made her head throb, like she had the worst hangover in the world. Victoria had seen her, mocking her for not being able to hang. She vowed to never drink again if she survived this. Chloe was here somewhere, but Rachel just needed out, now. She pushed open the doors, deeply inhaling the cool evening air. Pulling out her phone, she tried in vain to type, but everything came out jumbled and nonsensical.

The door opened behind her, Mark stepping out onto the sidewalk next to her. “Rachel, are you alright? Let me get you back to your dorm.”

By that point her vision was blurring and darkening at the edges, so she just nodded.

Next thing she knew, she woke up in the dark, feeling like she was flying. After a minute, looking around with each movement taking all her strength, she realized she was in Mark’s car, laying across the back seat. Realizing her phone was still clutched in her hand, she typed out a single text to Chloe, the car coming to a stop as she finished writing it.

1:29 AM: somethings wrong. scared. mark took me. idk where i am. help.

Mark opened the door, Rachel letting out a low groan as he dragged her from the car and letting her drop outside the car as he picked up her phone, watching the text try to send, until the words flashed across the screen.

MESSAGE SEND FAILURE. RETRY?

October 13th, 2013

Rachel had been in the hospital for three days, and only really conscious for two of them. Hooked up to an IV giving her nutrients to try and supply everything she’d missed over the last six months as well as water. They’d recovered her phone in the bunker, giving it back only after they’d gotten all evidence off of it. That pissed Rachel off, but she didn’t have a leg to stand on since her own naivete and secrecy had gotten her kidnapped in the first place. After everything, all the shit she’d hid from Chloe, Chloe had found her. Saved her. And Rachel couldn’t bring herself to talk to her.

Tongue bitten between her teeth, Rachel frowned at her phone for over a minute before hurriedly opening it and getting to Chloe’s messages. She’d seen all the calls Chloe had made to her before, when she was tied up and left to die. But none since, because she was a hundred feet away, in the waiting room.

1:56 PM: hey life saver. come say hi. i owe you a thanks. and like, so much more.

VICTORIA

March 7th, 2010

Why the fuck did I call her Kari? This was the thought swirling around Victoria’s head as she sat in her Chemistry class. She was replaying the scene over and over in her head. She’d asked, specifically, what Chloe’s name was on the picture of them at that concert. But instead of, “Hey, Chloe, cool concert?” she’d gone on some ego-maniac spiel about her dumb photography award, and called her Kari. Victoria was cringing so hard she thought she might combust.

Sneaking her phone from her bag to her lap, she typed out a quick, hopefully casual message.

9:56 AM: thnx for the chem help. maybe u could tutor? i can pay.

But then, from behind her, the teacher’s voice rang out shrill and angry. “Ms. Chase, what is the meaning of this?”

Dread and understanding filled her, and she deleted the message, typing out an angry, belligerent message in its place. Fuck Chloe, this is what happens when you ask for help.

January 1st, 2011

The night previous had been unexpected, to say the least. Chloe wasn’t exactly in Victoria’s social circle, and hadn’t been at Blackwell for over a year, so their only connection was the rare times Rachel forced them together to hang out with her. They tolerated each other, even occasionally laughed at each other’s jokes. But last night had been different.

Rachel had completely bailed from the Vortex party, leaving Chloe to mope in the corner, nursing her red solo cup clutched a little too aggressively to be casual.

Pathetic.

Just to get Chloe out of there, to avoid souring the mood of the whole party, Victoria had taken her out to stairs and offered her a cigarette, forgetting herself as she lit it by leaning in close with her own. Brown eyes meeting blue and illuminated by the burning ends of their cigarettes, they held the gaze for what could only be a moment before pulling back and laughing it off. What followed had been nearly an hour of honestly talking, ranging from Rachel being a bitch for ditching Chloe, to the Vortex Club, to life at Blackwell. Small talk, sure, but it was easier to talk to Chloe than Victoria could have ever expected. When it became clear Rachel wasn’t making a reappearance any time soon, Victoria walked Chloe back to her truck after double and triple checking she wasn’t too fucked up to drive.

Now, in the harsh lights of the bathroom as she double-checked her make up, Victoria looked down at her phone, even picking it up and typing out a message.

7:50 AM: it’s v. hope you didn’t die last night, from alcohol poisoning or otherwise. last night wasn’t terrible, quelle suprise. guess we’re not totally at a loss if rach keeps bailing.

Just then, Taylor and Courtney entered, Taylor immediately checking herself in the mirror, and Courtney handing Victoria her morning coffee. Forgetting the text, Victoria shut off her phone, and accepted the coffee.

March 11th, 2012

Despite the odds, Victoria and Chloe had gone from tolerating each other to something… Different. Rachel’s presence was no longer a prerequisite for them to hang out together, though they insisted on keeping it secret regardless. Their drunk talks outside Vortex Club parties had turned into dizzying, intense hookups in Chloe’s car, or the bathroom, or wherever else they could get before they tore each other’s clothes off.

And still, Victoria couldn’t bring herself to just be nice to her. She was well aware it was Chloe’s birthday, it was all over her Facebook and Rachel’s instagram, that they had “big plans” for the big 1-8.

Plans that did not include Victoria.

Poring over her homework, textbooks covering her entire desk, Victoria’s head jerked up when she heard the now familiar revving of Chloe’s hideous truck. For a second, she thought Chloe had changed her mind. Chosen to hang out with Victoria instead of Rachel, not just hung out with her because she was the next best option. Her heart jumped, and she picked up her phone to text the birthday girl.

10:25 AM: since it’s your birthday we’ll drop the pretense. give me five minutes-

But her heart dropped back down just as quickly with the all too familiar sound of the dorm door banging opening, where from her window she could see a streak of blonde hair and flannel running to Chloe’s truck.

Oh.

Silently, Victoria sank back into her desk chair, swallowing hard as she tried to focus on her work instead of the annoying, dull ache now sitting squarely in the middle of her chest.

August 7th, 2013

Rachel had been missing for three months and sixteen days. And Victoria had stopped answering Chloe’s texts a month ago. But she was beginning to crack. The texts from Chloe ranged from poorly faked nonchalance (’hey vic, whats up, i’m at blackwell let’s chill’) to accusatory (’you always hated rach, you wanted her gone, fuck you!’). So Victoria ignored them. But she was scared, just like Chloe. And sad. And news of the disappearance was harder to get ahold of when she wasn’t in Arcadia Bay, stuck home in Seattle until the beginning of the school. Skimming over the unanswered texts, Victoria bit her lip and started to type something out.

3:05 PM: any news? hope ur having a nice summer. other than the obvi.

But a knock at her bedroom door, and Danielle, the family’s cleaning lady, poking head in distracted her from the ache, if only for a minute. She threw her phone into the middle of her bed and walked out, giving a rare, sweet smile to Danielle, and flounced out of the room, pushing all thoughts of Rachel, Chloe, and Arcadia Bay from her mind.

October 4th, 2013

Oh my god. Ohmygodohmygodohmygod.

Even in Victoria’s alcohol and coke fueled buzz, she knew what she’d seen. Nathan had been shadowing Kate all night, after being the one to invite her, and then slipped something in her drink, which he was now handing off to her. Victoria felt icy, like all circulation in her body had stopped. The pounding bass felt otherworldly with the music muffled by her panic. In her mind, two dots struggled to connect, separated by months and what, at the moment, had seemed like absolutely nothing. But when Kate started stumbling, her dark blonde hair lit up by the flashing lights, deja vu hit Victoria like a truck.

Rachel had been drugged before she disappeared. It all made sense now. Why she was so out of it, and why she’d left so fast. Chloe was the first person Victoria thought of, and she fumbled to pull her phone out.

11:38 PM: chloe it’s vic call me ASAP i think i have a clue to what happened-

Courtney and Taylor, who until now had been watching Kate, mesmerized and horrified, looked over at Victoria for instruction. Victoria opened her mouth, unsure what was about to come out. Before she could speak. Courtney laughed and grabbed her phone. “Holy shit, Saint Kate is going Girls Gone Wild. We’re so posting this.”

November 24th, 2013

The month and some change since the End of the World Party had been bizarre. Victoria had lost nearly everything, from her Everyday Heroes win, to her friends, to the Vortex Club leadership position. But Max had approached her like it was nothing, and sat with her when no one else would, and brought her assignments when she couldn’t bear to leave her room. An extension of Max’s friendship was being reunited with Chloe, whom she hadn’t spoken to in four months.

It wasn’t easy, trying to piece together a genuine friendship after how quickly Victoria had dropped Chloe, and Chloe had accused her of being involved in their still-missing friend’s disappearance. But somehow, they did it. When Max headed off to Seattle for Thanksgiving break, and VIctoria’s family let her know she wouldn’t be welcome at the family gathering after her “disgrace”, Chloe was the first person she turned to.

11:40 AM: sorry for the late notice, but… any chance you’ve got a spare seat at your table? kinnnnnnnd of disinvited from thanksgiving, with nowhere to go.

Twelve long minutes later, her phone vibrated in her hand.

11:52 AM: v, i think if i turned you away my mom would disinvite me. yes, you’re coming. bonus points if you make david feel shitty with me.

#victoria; interactions #rachel; interactions #punkdtm

[glorioustimemachine]

Halloween Party (A YOI Ficlet I Quickly Wrote)

Halloween Night- A Few Months After Yuri Moved to St. Petersburg

Yuuri fussed over his own costume, frowning. It didn’t look right, he was sure. He couldn’t tell why, though, he just knew something was off.

“Alright, let’s just go through the list: Cape? Check. Billowy white shirt? Check. Blood red vest? Check. Black pants? Check. Gloves? Check. Fangs? Oh wait!

Yuuri put in his fangs and smiled. Now he was finished! A vampire, simple and clean (hint hint). He sighed and groaned. He hadn’t even stepped out of his room, and he was tired of the party.

Yuuri and Victor has been invited to a skating party at the ice rink. The requirement was to dress up and skate around for at least a minute, but Yuuri just wanted to skate. Alone. Or, maybe just with Victor. Either way, just pure bliss.

Speaking of the silver-haired, silver-tongued Russian, Victor came up behind him and kissed his neck. “Such a sexy vampire, I can feel your hypnotic powers working.” Victor wrapped his arms around Yuuri’s waist and smiled, then slowly frowned. “... You’re not happy.”

“I dunno, the get-up seems... Too much? I just don’t feel comfortable.”

Victor nodded, then rested his head on Yuuri’s shoulder. “Well, we can’t go without costumes. Mila demanded.”

Yuuri chuckled. “I know. I’ll just suffer through the party, I guess.”

Victor sighed, trying to think of how to please Yuuri, when his lover began to shiver.

“Are you cold?” Victor asked.

“Just a bit. This is a cheap costume.”

Victor pulled away, grabbed his jacket, then paused. “... What if you didn’t have to be a vampire?”

“... What did you have in mind?”

———————————————————

Yuri Plitsetsky was not one for costumes. Which is probably why he only had two options: A really cool tiger onesie; or a different, just as cool tiger onesie.

“Beka, which one?” He held up the two onesies against his body, facing the camera. Currently, Yuri was only in his black boxer-briefs, shuffling around. Otabek seemed slightly amused by how the Russian tiger-fairy was running around with no clothes on.

“I think what you have on now is just fine.”

Yuri deadpanned and flipped the bird to his phone’s camera. “I’m serious! I’m already late!”

“Alright, alright. Uh... the one in your right hand.”

He held up the one in said right hand and Otabek gave him a thumbs up. He smiled and rushed off-camera, but still close by.

“I know for sure I’m not gonna like this party. Ugh, it’s gonna be so boring!”

“Why’s that?”

Yuri poked his head back into frame. “First off, you won’t be there to make it actually cool. Or, cooler, since I’m going.”

“Of course,” Otabek rolled his eyes.

“Secondly, that Japanese piggy and his old ass fiancé are going to be there, and they’re gonna be gross!”

“Oh?”

“Gonna kiss and hug and just be gross. And Mila is bringing some new hussy boyfriend with her to the party, and they’re gonna be just as bad at the piggy.”

Otabek nodded. “Yeah. I wish I could join you. Probably would be a lot of fun.”

“Yeah... Definitely would be better with you here.” He came back into frame fully and smiled. “How do I look?”

“Ferocious.”

“FUCK YEAH!” Yuri laughed, smiling widely.

“Alright, I have to get on my flight. I’ll talk to you after.”

“Of course you will.” He smiled and hung up, then sighed flopped onto the bed. Needless to be said, Yuri missed his best friend.

———————————————————

Finally, everyone was at the party. Yuri was skating away from Mila, who was dressed as a black cat. Georgia was dressed as an emo/scene person, although he was confused to be the only person who evaded Mila’s rule about costumes. Even Lila and Yakov were dressed up, as Frakestein’s Bride and Frakenstein’s monster (Wait, they match...).

Outside the doors, Yuuri and Victor were adjusting each other’s costume.

“You sure about this, Victor?”

“It’s a costume, and a sexy one at that.”

“I feel like this is cheating.”

“What, to dress up like your favorite celebrity?”

Yuuri was about to counter, but Victor shushed him and pulled him into the rink. “We’re here!”

All the skaters turned to look at them and jaws dropped.

Yuuri was dressed up at 5x Gold-Medalist Victor Nikiforov Of Russia, and Victor was dressed up as Silver-Medalist of the 2016 Grand Prix Finals Katsuki Yuuri of Japan.

(Technically, Mila should’ve counted this as cheating, but they looked too adorable)

Yuri was the first person to speak: “GROSS, YOU TWO ARE DRESSED AS EACH OTHER?!”

Mila smirked. “You two look adorable!” Then, she resumed chasing around Yuri.

As the party went on, the couple of the hour went around, talking to others. At some point, Yuuri started to get really into his role.

“Look at me, I’m Victor Nikiforov and I think that if I just open my arms for someone to hug me, I don’t actually mean I want a hug. Don’t get blood on my vest!” Yuuri started to act like the jacket he wore- Victor’s competition jacket- was the vest he wore when Yuuri smacked his face into a wall during a competition.

“Yuuri, that was one time-“

“Ooh, I’m Victor, and I decided to retire as a professional skater, but not really!” Yuuri casually flipped his short hair back, smirking.

“Really, bringing that up-“

“Look, I’m Victor! I decided to be jealous and assume that the guy I have a crush on is dating his dance teacher!” He put his hands on his hips and smiled at Victor.

“... Alright, we can play that game.”

“Huh?”

“Hi there, I’m Yuuri Katsuki and I got drunk at a GPF banquet and flirted with my future fiancé!” Victor smiled and draped himself over Yuuri, who was blushing madly now.

“Victor, I swear to god-“

“I’m Yuuri Katsuki and I decided to skate an Eros routine, but envisioned my eros as a porn cutlet bowl!” Victor posed sexily, smirking.

“Boi-“

“I’m Yuuri Katsuki and I got my boyfriend and I matching wedding rings. But, we’re not engaged, they’re just for ‘good luck’.”

Yuuri was about to retort, when Yuri called out, “SHUT UP, YOU TWO! YOU’RE BEING GROSSER THAN USUAL!”

The two lovers looked at each other and smiled, then rushed over to Yuri in the rink and started to tease him.

“LOOK AT ME, IM YURI PLITSETSKY AND IM SO EDGY! I WEAR DARK MAKEUP AND LISTEN TO HEAVY METAL!”

“IM YURI PLITSETSKY AND I PLANNED AN EXHIBITION SKATE THE NIGHT BEFORE I PERFORMED IT!”

“IM GOING TO KILL YOU TWO!” Yuri started to pull off his skate, prompting the other two to skate away.

———————————————————

Near the middle of the night, Yuri was against the rink walls, texting, when Mila came up.

“We got a new guest. Can you go see so it is?”

“Why should I if you already know-“

“Just go!” She pushed him towards the exit of the rink. He huffed and slowly skated to the exit, then saw who the new guest was.

In a large, teddy bear onesie and with a suitcase, Otabek stood at the doorway.

Two seconds later, Yuri rushed over and launched himself onto Otabek, smiling widely and screaming, “BEKA!”

(Later the next day, someone found a video someone had taken of Yuri tackling Otabek, and someone may have put it to the audio of “This bitch empty, YEET!”)

#fanfic #yuri on ice #yoi fanfic #yoi #halloween #parties

[bxckpills]

i have a lot of thoughts under the cut. ifs2 spoilers up to episode 9. cw for discussions of addiction and abuse

initially i was really upset with the path that the writers were taking with ward. episode 1 happened and i was pretty sure i’d have to burn it all. but i’ve been giving it a lot of intense thought and i’m coming to the conclusion that burning it isn’t necessarily the answer. 

here’s the thing;

i’ve made my feelings on bethany very clear but for the sake of keeping everything together: what she did was extremely unethical and a massive abuse of power. their entire relationship dynamic is imbalanced af and that makes itself very clear very quickly. it’s gross; grosser still that bethany herself never seems to acknowledge how fucked up it truly is (aside from flippant comments about crossing lines.) 

here’s the other thing; 

this unfortunately is not an unheard of phenomena. ward has a lot of things at play here but i think it’s important to keep in mind that he was a full-fledged addict for a long while, and he was severely abused for the entirety of his life--and that has just recently come to an end. i think both these things play a part in why ward got involved with bethany. 

addiction recovery is a really tricky animal and it’s extremely common that when someone’s stopping or trying to curb an addiction, they pick up a new one. we can also kind of see this when walker’s talking about ward’s stringent schedule--his days moving like clockwork. he was trying to stop using & the sex felt good; his brain is wired to overindulge so there it is. 

abuse is also very, very tricky--it can fuck with your self worth so much and it can make you cling so super hard to anyone who shows you kindness or validation. this can be disastrous if there’s a power dynamic at play with the person in question, like a teacher or a mentor or a therapist, etc. and they don’t establish and maintain hard lines of acceptable and unacceptable behavior. unfortunately many people see that vulnerability and take advantage of it and this leads to unhealthy relationships. 

ward didn’t have anyone, which complicates this even more. harold was dead; danny and joy were gone; and because of the constant isolation caused by harold he didn’t have a support system to fall on when he was recovering. so he went to na to try and find that system. bethany was probably kind, welcoming, happy for him to be taking this step so ward probably clung onto that. and god it aches because it’s such a familiar story--you’ll do anything for that person, you might not even like them that much but the attention makes you feel like you’re alive and you’re worth something. and after years of not feeling that, to feel that again...you’ll do anything to make it stay. 

talking about this is so hard for me, and i think that’s where my initial anger stemmed from. and that’s not to say that we should push ourselves to talk about things we’re not ready to, but it feels like it’s time. and it’s funny because this is exactly how i felt about ward the first time i watched season 1--i was so angry at him because in a lot of ways that was me and it fucking hurt. and it sucks to see his choices being written off as ‘sleazy sluttiness’ and bad characterization because that was also me. (though i don’t have the right equipment to get anyone pregnant, much to my chagrin.)

i mean i get it, i had so many post season 1 hc’s that got blown out the window. it sucks to expect one thing and be given something else. but life......life is so much more complicated than ten episodes of a tv show. the people i gravitated towards in my time of extreme vulnerability were all older cis men who should have known better and took advantage of me anyway--now i don’t really even like cis men outside of aesthetics. i used to think that i wasn’t capable of loving someone romantically--now i’ve been engaged for two years last thursday. the present doesn’t have to negate the past, and the future can be something else entirely. personhood isn’t a stagnant experience, and even if phases are fleeting they can still be important to the making of you and your self, space intentional. 

what i’m trying to say is i may not be retconning as much as i thought (though with the verses i have set up, most of this can’t have happened logistically bc timelines.) once i’ve finished processing the series, i’m going to work on a proper post season 2 verse and obviously i’ll be posting about that once it’s underway.

i thank you all for your patience, for holding my hand, for the good vibes. all of it means more than you know. hit me up if you want to do s2 things bc my schedule’s worked itself out so i’ll have more time on here to......do things lmao 

#this isn't as meta-ey as i anticipated but i think i need to finish it properly before i can write something like that lmao #this got very difficult and very personal but honestly? that's the nature of the w/ard game. #that's what brought me to him in the first place. how could i ask for anything less? #iron fist season 2 #anyway have my hard truths thank you

[theflavouryellow]

Trichotillomania

Trichotillomania

Pronounced: Trick - Oh - Till - Oh - Mania  (Trich for short, we cool like that)

What it is: Obsessive repetitive disorder in which one pulls from hair. 

It all started at 9 years old, hearing the sweet words pour from a young teachers mouth about SATS, you know those tests you take as a child? Yes, those. 

“We’re not going to spoon feed you anymore”

Ominous right? Terrifying? You’re correct. I’m obviously joking but I was 9 years old faced with this option and I decided then and there he was talking about life as a whole and how you will have to trudge through this adventure on your own.

I felt alone, I felt unsure about myself and most of all I felt anxious. A 9 year old feeling anxious, this was not feeling I had felt as a child and so, I did the best thing I could do and, pulled. I started, plucking, pulling, tugging, removing strand after strand from my scalp until red, until pain until bleeding, constantly and never wanting to stop.

Trichotillomania has effected my life every single day from then. I’m self critical in most situations, especially in public. I’m on edge that someone will mention it, it’s so obvious I doubt anybody would, but it’s there lingering in the front of my mind, I’m always on edge and it’s so exhausting. 

I went through high school unable to be free, as a sagittarius soul is, I was always mean to people who probably didn’t deserve it because I was so mean to myself, I never wanted to be hurt so I always put up a fight to show how I wasn’t weak and how I wasn’t vulnerable, realising only now how weak and vulnerable I was because of my aggressive nature. As I spoke to friends through out the years they have mentioned how little they cared about the bald spots that appeared and reappeared through the years, one of the loveliest things was said by a friend who simply said “with or without hair, I still love you” and it was one of the first times I realised I am not just a girl with big bald spots looming over her life and I wouldn’t let it rule me.

Of course like any teenage girl I was already running into self esteem issues left and right and with this weird disorder I felt one thousand times more out of place than any one else. (The world revolves around me, obviously) Everything seemed very hard at this time of my life, friends were being young and beautiful and I seemed to accidentally isolate myself because I was scared from literally everything, how sad it was to feel fear every time I drew a breath. This led to a couple of years I am ashamed to say of listening to punk music and wearing black vans, listen we’ve all been there so quit the judgement thank-you.

This left me being a sad bald teenager for a very long time and I thought that’s all I was.

However, if everyone else is something special then so am I, but of course I’m a awful human being and my mind would tennis match back and forth about how I’m not special but also I am the worst human alive. All because of this stupid disorder my DNA decided to throw at me, cheers for that. I got extensions which were hot and itchy, I got them so new people who moved into 6th form wouldn’t ask questions about my scalp showing through the tufts of hair sprouting from it. I got rid of that pretty quickly because masking your issues don’t work. I would’ve thought I’d learnt my lesson however getting my first job I decided to wear a bandana to work, with two tiny space buns poking out the sides, if you imagine a massive hipster who has just decided to rock that man bun and hasn’t got any hair to actually do that, add a bit of weight and some boobs and ta-da! you have me at nineteen years old. 

I can’t say I have improved. I removed my bandana one day after telling people in work not to ask questions or be annoying about anything. To be honest I doubt anybody cares about my hair as much as me. I still don’t want to see anybody from school because it’s embarrassing to be seen with me, therefore I’m doing them a favour, obviously great for the self esteem that. 

I just showered and thought why not talk about it on the internet and to be honest with you all, I don’t know why I am. I think the point I’m trying to make is that your biggest insecurity doesn’t mean that’s your whole person, there is so much more to people than just the one problem they see with themselves. I’m done with thinking how hard it is for me because my hands decide to snap to my head every time I get hot, hungry, tired, sad or in most cases pure boredom, this shouldn’t affect me so much that I don’t leave my house or be always ready to argue with someone, because that is quite tiring and honestly I’m getting grey hairs. 

It’s ok to be vulnerable. It’s ok to show your flaws because literally nobody cares, that’s what I’m trying to get at, and if they do say something in a mean spirited way how sad for their soul that it’s so tormented it needs to point out a insecurity and try and belittle you, if that’s what they want to do with their day so be it, but it’s lovely of them to tell you about what you already know because you and I both know you’re a massive smart ass who loves to be all knowing all powerful. 

I realise now, at 20 that just because I have bald patches or just because you have an insecurity doesn’t make you any less of a meaning to life, it doesn’t make you uglier or grosser or more monster-like than the rest of them. For my issue, it’s hair- you know? It’s a really really weird type of hair style that, granted I did not pay for and if I did I would request, neigh DEMAND my money back and it’s just a part of me, it doesn’t make up 100% of me because I am more than just my habit or my insecurity.

You are important too and life needs to be lived with excitement about what’s around the corner, not fear. It makes you bitter inside. It’s not realistic it’s sad, and it’s not a bad thing to expect happiness from life. 

I’ve grown since 9 years old but I still get teary eyed like some toddler whenever someone mentions the fact my hair is proper weird. Perhaps I will try yoga or meditation and it’ll fix my problems and then I’ll grow my hair and live my life, move to the welsh mountains and forever shower in waterfalls but for the time being I think I’m going to try and love myself despite my massive bald flaw.

I’ll report back with my findings in the next blog post.

Think of yourself as a luxury and not a burden, it probably helps the old mental health thing. 

If you get this far thank-you for reading my word vomit of this. I realise that this is a very non-issue issue I’m talking about however it’s important to me. Trich has ran most of my life, it’s made me be ugly for 11 years. Of course I am in no way saying bald patches are the source to my ugliness (anymore my whole face and body in general is a bit gross too) but it was for a really really long time, and for the majority of the time I believed it. I still do to some extent. 

To end, (finally) love yourself because if anything it’s easier in the long run, be easy and enjoy adventure as it comes.

CDL 

p.s if you wanna see my baldies u can click here :-) [bit weird but i rly cant judge x]

#trichotillomania #trich #bfrb #blogposts #lifestyle

[yallreddieforthis]

I Can’t Believe It’s Not Richie

Fandom: It (2017)

Pairing: Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier

Rating: T (for language)

Words: 2.7k

Pre-relationship. Movie canon-compliant but not book. Also posted on AO3

The Greater Fool Series: Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 4.5 (NSFW) | Part 5

It seems impossible that a person can be both that shitty and the shit at the same time but like...it’s Richie. And since Richie doesn’t give a single fuck about following any kind of rules, Eddie guesses the ones that govern Eddie’s emotions don’t apply to him either. Greaaaat.

Sometimes Eddie can't believe it's Richie.

Maybe even most of the time, like when everything out of his mouth is your mom and my wang and it's just words, it's not even funny, and Eddie can only tune him out or try to talk over him. Richie cannot shut the fuck up for one goddamn second. And it's not even like Eddie can pin it to anything specific—like, oh, Richie talks more when he's angry or nervous or excited—because he does it when he's every one of those things and any other thing besides. The tone may change—the subject matter even—but the talking. Never. Stops.

Eddie doesn’t really consider himself a beacon of cultural knowledge, but he does own a TV. So he at least has a vague idea of what a British person might sound like, which is more than he can say for Richie. Richie also owns a TV, and yet his British Guy impression is so god-awful that Eddie has to assume he’s basing it on someone’s description of a fever dream they once had about a London street urchin from the eighteen hundreds. This only applies to the actual words though, not the pronunciation—which is pretty much indistinguishable from just Richie being Richie—and that’s across the board for all the voices, not just the British Guy. For someone who loves imitating other people as much as Richie does, it’s unbelievable how remarkably all his Guys sound like they’re from Derry, Maine. Because shouting out mangled phrases he half-remembers from the time he watched Mary Poppins six years ago—in the most American voice imaginable—is still somehow Richie’s interpretation of a British accent.

That isn’t even the worst part of The Voices though. The worst part is that Richie seems to have a sixth sense that alerts him to the exact moment at which it would most infuriate Eddie for him to do one, and invariably it’s as if a little light goes off in the least-developed part of his brain that says Time To Be Italian! (or Southern, or German—he has a constantly expanding, but not noticeably improving, repertoire) and it’s like he just has to do it right then. Sometimes it makes Eddie want to scream at him. Sometimes Eddie does scream at him. But screaming makes no difference; Eddie knows perfectly well that Richie will absolutely do it again the second the urge strikes him, no matter how inappropriate the timing or what Eddie does in reaction.

He's fucking gross too. Not necessarily grosser than the rest of them, but he certainly subscribes to the teenage boy brand of hygiene that dictates that he only really has to shower when Eddie finally shoves him away with a you smell like a sweaty nutsack. Of course then Richie inches closer and it's all how would you know, huh? and Eddie has to be like because I have nuts too, dipshit, and if you never wash them you'll—

And then all his warnings about bacteria and fungal infections are drowned out in the your mom and my wang and vague, half-heard rumors Richie repeats about people from school that Eddie knows aren't true, and he's pretty sure Richie doesn't even believe himself. Fuck him and his terrible, nasty-ass jokes.

Some days he thinks Richie purposely doesn't shower specifically so that he can torment Eddie with his unbearable boy stank. Or how he'll like, step in dog shit and just sort of shrug and wipe the sole of his shoe in the grass and then keep going with whatever he was doing like he's not literally tracking shit everywhere. If Eddie were to step in dog shit—which he wouldn't because he watches where he's going like a sane person—it would bring his entire day to a screeching halt. He gets that he's in the minority when it comes to these kinds of things, but he doesn't get why.

And then Richie has the audacity to suggest that Eddie's just as bad as the rest of them—when he says things like you’re convinced your shit doesn't stink, or it’s the smell of your own breath wafting back in your face—like he thinks Eddie is kind of gross too. Which shouldn't bother him, but it does. Somewhere very, very deep down in his gut he has a nagging suspicion as to why that might possibly be, but he's hell-bent on ignoring it at least until the inevitable destruction of the planet Earth, if not even longer. And that’s going like...pretty well for him. Reasonably well. Maybe a little less well than it used to be, but he's almost fourteen now and he thinks he should probably have a solid handle on the whole thing within the next couple of years.

But even if Richie wasn't either of those things—annoying, disgusting—there's nothing really exceptional that he is. It's not like he's a genius; the gigantic, goofy glasses make him look smarter than he actually is, and he gives as few shits about school as he does about anything else. Eddie is sure that Mrs. Tozier has never been to a parent-teacher conference where she didn’t hear the phrase if he only applied himself, and he’s equally sure that every one of the teachers who said it knew that they were wasting their breath. If Mrs. Tozier—or anyone else—stood even the slightest chance of motivating Richie to care about pre-algebra, there would have been upward mobility in his GPA long before now. Eddie has to assume he does at least some homework—if for no other reason than because he hasn’t been held back yet—but as far as he can tell, Richie bent over a textbook at home is a sight as yet unwitnessed by mankind.

Richie’s not athletic either—by any definition of the word—at least not until they decide to make Competitive Talking an Olympic sport. He’s really good on his bike, but that’s a skill he developed out of practicality because the alternative is being stuck walking all over Derry, and it’s not like being able to ride a bike is something to brag about because even Eddie can do that. But Richie’s not a fast runner. He can’t do a push-up unless it’s the kind that only count as push-ups when girls do them, knees on the ground. He can’t even throw a spitball into a trash can from three feet away (his performance in the Rock War against Bowers and his goons was a crazy, adrenaline-fueled exception)—and like, okay, the bad aim can probably be chalked up to his horrendous eyesight, but even beyond that there’s this general, overall lack of coordination. Eddie has what amounts to a universal pass that effectively excuses him from participating in PE for his entire school career, so he’s never been physically present for what goes down on the yard, but he can pretty much piece it together from the scrapes and bruises all over Richie’s arms and legs. It doesn’t matter what unit they’re on—dodgeball, baseball, soccer, tetherball—Richie plays only one position: target.

He doesn’t fare any better in the kind of extracurriculars that teachers and parents care about, like music. Richie is an aggressively bad singer—a fact Eddie is forcibly reminded of every time anyone has a birthday because Richie always makes a point of sandwiching Eddie between himself and someone who won’t run away (usually the birthday kid’s mom) while he belts out an eardrum-shattering rendition of Happy Birthday at the top of his lungs. Richie seems to interpret birthday party invitations as personal challenges for him to sing louder and worse, challenges he has so far risen to spectacularly on every occasion. The song gets longer each time too, because he never forgets to include Frankenstein on channel nine and the big fat lady on channel eighty and whatever new, ruder verses he’s scrounged up out of nowhere between the last birthday party and this one. Richie’s singing is actually one of the most obnoxious things about him, in Eddie’s opinion, which is really saying something.

He is so unrestrainedly, deliberately awful that Eddie could honestly imagine some idiot adult who doesn’t know Richie listening to him screech the chorus of Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go over and over in Eddie’s ear (the newest sabotage tactic he’s been deploying at the arcade to try to make Eddie lose at Street Fighter) and thinking wow, maybe that kid actually has a beautiful singing voice but doesn’t want anyone to know because he’s worried people will make fun of him. They would be wrong, of course, because even when he’s not actively trying to suck, Richie can’t sing for shit. Eddie doesn’t have to know anything about music to be able to tell that Richie’s real singing voice—the one he almost never uses—is flat and off-key. And forget about instruments because whenever someone makes the mistake of letting him get his hands on one, he immediately tries to shove it down his pants—or worse, Eddie’s pants—and pretend it’s a wang.

There’s art—and Eddie has noticed that being a really good artist can absolve someone of the sin of sucking at everything else. Bill, for example, is talented enough with watercolor pencils that if he drew people’s attention to his sketches, he could probably get away with not knowing how to write a half-decent thesis statement or multiply fractions (even though Bill does know how to do those things) because people would just affix the tortured artist label to him and stop giving him shit about the stutter. And Richie actually draws a lot—probably as much as Bill if it’s purely a question of quantity over quality—it’s just that the only things he seems to be interested in drawing are dicks, and the places he chooses to draw them are all technically the property of the Derry Public School District. Also, his fine motor skills are at least as bad as his gross ones, because his handwriting looks the way his singing voice sounds, and the dicks he draws make Eddie question if Richie has ever even looked in his own pants before.

And yet, despite all of the incontrovertible evidence that Richie is actually a walking disaster, there are other times that Eddie can't believe it’s not Richie to everyone else. Or even like anyone else.

It could be argued that it’s almost inevitable due to the sheer volume of jokes he tells, but every so often Richie will get one absolutely, unassailably right. His timing, his word choice—the heavens open, the planets align, and suddenly everybody around him is laughing so hard they can't breathe, Eddie included. His eyes usually end up watering when it happens, but he squints through them to look at Richie because in those moments, Richie glows like nothing else. He tries to act like it isn’t a big deal that everyone is pissing themselves from whateverthefuck he just blurted out of his incessantly flapping mouth hole, but Eddie can tell how thrilled he is when people actually find him funny. It's happening more and more often nowadays, enough so that Eddie sometimes wonders if maybe Richie is wasting his time at school after all. And who needs sports or music or art anyway?

And he could be a whole lot worse about Eddie’s germ thing if he wanted to be, like how some people give him hell about the pills and the inhaler and the hand washing. Richie doesn’t have detergent hands but he sure as shit will mouth off to anybody who gives Eddie a hard time about his. He can’t say Richie doesn’t at least try to look out for him, in his own weird way. Or Bill, or Stan, or Mike, or any of them. It causes more trouble than it’s worth more often than not, especially because Richie doesn’t have any discernable muscle with which to back up his shit-talking, so it probably would honestly be better if he would just like...not. But Eddie can’t really help appreciating it all the same.

But the hardest thing to ignore about Richie—and Eddie wouldn’t admit this to anyone, even under threat of death by clown—is that his memories of what Richie did for him over the summer have become a kind of personal, private shield against fear. They all try to avoid thinking about It as much as they reasonably can (which isn’t much; it’s not like you just go and forget about the time you and all your friends climbed down a haunted well so you could almost get eaten by a demon clown in the sewers), but Eddie’s positive he isn’t the only one who lies awake at night when the sound of his own pounding heartbeat is making him too nauseous to sleep.

The lights are off because it’s almost worse when they’re on. Maybe if he can’t see It coming, it’ll just eat him real fast and get it over with before he even knows what hit him. Still, he doesn’t want to die—instantly is preferable to slowly, but even better is not at all. So he’s developed a set of dozens of little rules for himself to follow—like no turning over, no breathing too deeply, no limbs outside the covers, no long, slow blinks (quick ones are okay; otherwise it’s eyes all the way closed or all the way open). Realistically he knows that not a single one of these rules means jack shit to anyone outside his own brain, but somehow no-ing himself into what amounts to a vegetative state eventually bores him to sleep. Okay, usually it does. More like occasionally. Actually it’s only worked like twice, but whatever. He’ll take what he can get at this point.

Sometimes Eddie thinks he has it worse than anyone else. Well, maybe not worse than Bill. But the rest of them—he isn’t sure if any of them can really understand exactly how fucking useless he felt down in that god-forsaken lair with his arm in a cast. Bill and Beverly were awesome, Mike was like a goddamn soldier, Stan was great after he’d finished crying and even Ben, who Eddie basically thinks of as the most inoffensive kid on the planet, was tough as balls. And Eddie felt like a worthless piece of shit. He hates his arm for being broken, and he hates his nightmares for always including the broken arm. It’s coming at him—just him—and his arm is hanging limply and there’s not a goddamn thing he can do—

And that’s where Richie comes in. Only when he thinks about Richie bitching Bill out for getting them all into this shit situation while inching toward the mountain of broken toys, Richie grabbing a baseball bat and saying now I’m going to have to kill this fucking clown...only then does the terror that surrounds him all through the night start to ease up.

And then he thinks a little further back about when he fell through the floor and broke his arm in the first place, about how all his friends were crowding him and freaking the fuck out, and Richie just looked at his arm and said he was going to set the break and snapped his bone back into place while Eddie shrieked at him to do not fucking touch me. Just like, grabbed his arm where it was dangling the wrong way and fucking did it.

Sometimes… Sometimes Eddie is positive that if It were to show up in his house on any given night, Richie would immediately come crashing through his bedroom window, swinging a baseball bat. Because somehow Richie would know if It returned, would know It was coming for Eddie, would show up in time. He’d show up and keep his shit together while Eddie couldn’t. He’d probably sometimes miss with the bat, but Eddie kind of suspects that it wouldn’t matter. Richie would stand between Eddie and It and just sort of suck all the scary out of the room with his endless, pointless trash-talking. And when Eddie thinks about it that way, it’s like you know what? Screw John McClane; Richie Tozier is Eddie’s hero.

And then Richie sticks his sweaty armpit in Eddie’s face and goddamn it Eddie can’t believe it’s Richie.

#it (2017) #reddie #richie tozier #eddie kaspbrak #my fics #pre-relationship #the greater fool #sorry i'm an old person and it took me a million years to figure out how to post fics on tumblr

[bizarrebird]

Okay so, to start this, for reference, I have watched Buffy: the Vampire Slayer several times and taken a class entitled “Understanding the Whedonesque” and written/read several papers about all things Whedon, Buffy in particular, so I feel like I’m at least somewhat qualified to speak on the subject so, here we go

I will put the bloggings under a readmore. And yes, I am very sure someone before me has done this better, but I’ve had a lot of wine and this shit seems fun, so fuck it. And yes, I do like Buffy. I honestly do. Regardless of literally everything Joss Whedon, it’s a good show and was very important (arguably still important) for its time. So this may be a continuing thing. We’ll see.

Diana Liveblogs Buffy (Season 2, Episode 1: When she was bad)

tw: this episode features undiagnosed ptsd, and the subsequent mistreatment and misunderstanding of someone suffering said condition

We’re starting with Season 2, Episode 1 (Because most of season 1 just... isn’t good. Like it’s just bad. The first and last episode are passable, but the rest is mostly eh, and I won’t be revisiting it without significant comment)

So we start in with Xander* (human garbage) and Willow (a sweet child who deserves better) talking idly exchanging movie references (dumb ones, like really really, dumb ones. No seriously their big references are Planet of the Aps (the old as fuck one) and Star Wars (also the old as fuck one) don’t worry about it, Joss still thinks these are smart) and talking about the fact that Buffy has left to spend the summer (after she fucking died) with her estranged father in LA. This scene shows, rather explicitly that Willow has feelings for Xander which aren’t (????) reciprocated, as he is still very much hung up on Buffy, asking if she asked about him when she contacted Willow. Which is of course the most important thing she could have possibly done in such a situation. (we will revisit later all the times Xander* is terrible about Buffy and several other people/things as we go This is the first of many that will be touched on.) Xander* mentions that he has “certain needs” because he’s a man. Wow. A man. Wanting to fuck a woman. How amazing. What intense drama. The fact that Buffy might not be interested occurring to him exactly... never. Huh. How about that.

*fuck Xander

There’s sexual tension here that’s really awkward (more awkward with the fact that WILLOW IS GAY AND I WILL TALK ABOUT THIS IN SEASON FOUR BUT SHE IS GAY) were Xander* dabs her nose with ice-cream and cleans it off. And okay, honestly credit where credit is due this could have been grosser with him licking it off, but he doesn’t. He gently cleans it away. AND THEN They are attacked by a vampire and saved by Buffy, who seemingly appears out of nowhere to save her friends.

THINGS IT IS IMPORTANT TO NOTE IN THIS FIGHT SCENE

Xander does push Willow back and tells her to go. Ignoring the macho vibes here, he is trying to protect his friend who he was about to kiss. I don’t give Xander a lot of credit, but this is a decent moment.

Buffy slays this vampire by pushing him into a tree branch. Thus she does not kill the first vamp. She pushes him onto another object that kills him. No trust me this is a big deal. Buffy has not killed a vampire with her own two hands for a while. Willow hugs her and then She then asks “Miss me?” as we go to opening credits

((This is important. I don’t care about the hugs we get after credits, we don’t know if her friends missed her and I don’t know how to tell you how important that is))

Buffy comments on the fact that neither of them are ready to deal with vampires “very sloppy”.  Which they brush off, Xander* saying “that’s the first vampire we’ve seen since you killed the Master”. Buffy is immediately uncomfy, but they all blow through it. Xander* draws attention back to the vampire she just killed, and Buffy admitting that she went hard (”yeah, I didn’t kinda wail on him, didn’t I?”), but then that gets brushed off too. (do we see a theme yet???)

*fuck Xander

Willow says Buffy missed them burying the Master’s bones, and there’s this very close shot on Buffy’s face as she looks where Willow’s pointing. No one else notices, and no one else cares that Buffy is very obviously having a reaction to that and they just go on with their business saying they’re glad Buffy is back. (There’s a question asking whether she’s seen Giles yet and she’s pointedly ???? about it (cause she doesn’t want to admit to any issues) but that is a whole other Slayer/Watcher video that will develop as we go)

Alright then we go to:

Buffy’s parents putting away her stuff, which honestly is????? I think this plot would mean more if Joss got to do his actual version of the movie and Buffy’s dad got more screen time. But he doesn’t and Joss didn’t so this is just real awkward time that could have been devoted to my queen Joyce. Her dad mentions Buffy was distant. This is maybe because SHE FUCKING DIED AND NO ONE CARES. NO LITERALLY NO ONE GIVES A SHIT SHE DIED. THEY ASKED A 15-16 YEAR OLD GIRL TO DIED AND WERE SUPER CONFUSED WHEN SHE WAS UPSET ABOUT IT.

Okay, but this is not to shit on Joyce. She’s a good mom and she does her best. Please if you are for whatever reason only watching this show now, give Joyce a chance. She’s trying.

So we go to the school and

Cordelia (light of my life and sunshine of my heart this will make sense season 3 or when we get to Angel trust me) complaining about her parents not taking her on a glamorous vacation (this will be important later). Cordelia asks “is it possible to have too much character”, which is a great question (the answer is yes) and we’ll also get back to that later. Then we go to Giles and new (ish, remind me when hyenas ate the last dude) principal Snyder. There is an, extremely worrying comment from Snyder about how ‘every girl makes boys a time bomb’ (no like what the actual fuck Joss that’s so fucked up).

Snyder makes a comment about teenage boys turning into idiots around girls that ‘ironically’ (Joss Whedon doesn’t know what irony is) signals the arrival of Jenny Calendar. Jenny is the computer class (computer sciences???? idk what the fuck they were teaching in the 90s) teacher who helped last season with the destruction of the Master (a lame villain with like minimal buildup and a shitty plot, who killed Buffy cause fuck Joss Whedon).

Giles also likes her. A lot. This will be important later when the plot remembers who she is for drama.

Snyder ends this scene with the line “I might as well be talking to myself”, which HAHA he is. Isn’t that clever? Oh man, Joss, that’s a good one. So fucking original. I can’t believe this guy lasts as long as he does with the shit Joss gives him. No, seriously, look him up, he’s a decent actor??? but all he gets are bit parts cause of shit like this

Anyway

We go to Giles talking with Jenny about her exciting summer at Burning Man. Here we see how cool and ‘in touch with the youths’ Jenny is and Giles isn’t. Wow, how ever will they work out their issues? We just don’t know. There’s some marginally flirty banter featuring Giles picking up on the word ‘naked’ (so clever Joss wow, you are a wordsmith) and Jenny teasing him about liking books (she hints at him reading dirty books, or her liking them. idk what the real point is here) before Xander and Willow show up. Buffy shows up and Giles asks “how are you?”

To which she responds “alive and kicking.”

There’s a lot of fairly pointed stuff here about her dying and coming back, which again NO ON FUCKING TALKS ABOUT. But whatever. Buffy’s good. Like so good.

They quickly discuss and establish that the Hellmouth is still an open and active thing that they should be worrying about. Just in case anyone was wondering what this show would have going for it.

Now okay, Giles does try to be a decent human being here. He asks Buffy when she wants to start training again and clearly feels bad about the whole thing. And when she says she wants to start just then he’s iffy cause he knows there’s some underlying issues going on. But Buffy does insist. She says she’s ready.

INTENSE TRAINING MONTAGES

Okay so 90s montages aren’t what they are now, but the show does make it clear Buffy’s hung up on the Master and, y’know, the whole deal where he killed her. Yeah, that’s still a thing.

Then there’s some vamp stuff that like might have gone somewhere if the kid playing the anointed one wasn’t getting too old. But seriously in two episodes no one’s gonna care. Just worry about how this shit affects Buffy, that’s what matters.

And then Buffy has a dream where Giles tries to kill her while her friends sit there doing nothing. This is obviously super important, but again a point that I feel other people have probably covered better. But the essentials are that Buffy feels like Giles, and to a bigger extent the Watcher’s council don’t care and are actively trying to kill her, and that her friends (when push comes to shove) will stand by and let him do so.

We then go to this shot of Buffy’s window and SURPRISE SURPRISE when she looks back to it Angel is there. Who could have guessed. And okay like, this is a step up from Twilight. I will admit that. But it’s not as much of one as people want it to be. A 100+ year old dude creeping on a girl in high school will always be creepy. HOWEVER BUFFY HANDLES IT BETTER AND YOU CAN FIGHT ME ON THIS LATER.

So to the point.

Angel is in her bedroom because he has an invite to the Summers’ house. This will be important later. Vampires who are given invitations to a house can use it whenever. REMEMBER THIS.

So anyway, Angel is literally the first person to actually ask how Buffy is. She does shrug that off, but that’s still important. No one else even bothers asking. However, when Buffy presses, Angel reveals that there’s other stuff going on which is the real reason he’s there.

Again, no one is asking about Buffy’s issues because they honestly, earnestly care. Just wanna point that out.

For what it’s worth, Angel does apologize for not having better news and for (at least I like to think this**) not having unselfish reasons to check in. And Angel does try to warn her about the anointed one’s power, which is... nice?

SPOILER WARNING: Nothing comes of this because the actor playing the anointed one was getting to old and wouldn’t work as a recurring villain.

This scene doesn’t quiiiite end there because (and I’m going to try to be civil about the Bangel moments because I don’t wanna shit on anyone’s ship, but god Angel’s the worst) Buffy asks ‘is that it?’ Like, quite clearly expecting more. That isn’t a subtle signal Angel, what the fuck

But he leaves with an awkward “I missed you” before Buffy can respond cause he’s an awkward asshole who doesn’t know how to process emotions. Yes, this is a recurring thing with him. Don’t expect it to get better. It won’t. Yes, Buffy deserves better. She won’t get it, I’m sorry.

ANYWAY

Her mom drives her to school, and here we see THE SECOND PERSON TO GIVE A SHIT AND SORT OF ASK BUFFY WHAT’S WRONG. She doesn’t do it perfectly, and Buffy doesn’t respond, but like... this tiny moment it a looooot for this show. Trust me. You will be amazed at the amount of “I don’t give a shit” that happens later comparatively to the two whole people we had giving a shit here about Buffy’s issues.

Clearly, by what we see, Buffy says nothing to Joyce here. HOWEVER she mentions something about Angel to Willow and Xander. Who are no help. At all. They ask about kissing (Willow, sweet bab) and groping (Xander, oh honey no, I see you Joss, I fuckin see you). So yeah. MENTION OF RELEVANT 90s BAND AT THE BRONX WOW WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE I DON’T REMEMBER

And then Cordelia (my queen) arrives. The show is blessed with her glorious, radiant presence, and we should be so grateful.

So Cordelia (my badass queen who knows no bounds) just flat out stats that she knows demons are a thing and she’s not afraid to admit it. Xander and Willow are trying to keep up the ‘all is normal’ thing, but sweet Cordy has no patience for them. Cordelia (wonder of wonders) says she’s still freaked about being around for the Master stuff last year and (WITH A VERY SIGNIFICANT CLOSE SHOT) tells Buffy “your secret’s safe with me” (which would be a declaration of love on any show between an m/m pair I’m just fucking saying). Buffy (who isn’t ready to accept that she’s bi yet) brushes her off, which, I just wanna say, EVERYONE IN THAT SCENE POINTS OUT.

And we cut to the Bronze (idk if that’s the most correct spelling, but that’s what google seems to think is cool) . Willow and Xander are talking with Willow ( a soft child who knows little of the world yet) saying Buffy’s different now and Xander (a gremlin) saying who cares. Xander just wants to ogle that sweet Buffy bod, which becomes apparent when Willow tries to recreate their cutesy moment from before and it shot down completely.

And I forgot about this moment cause no one cares, but we cut away to vampire biz with the Anointed Baby digging up the Master’s bones for some creeptastic ritual. He doesn’t care about his followers and neither should you. This scene would matter if the anointed one matter, but he doesn’t, so it doesn’t. The only thing that should matter here is that the ground where the Master is buried is consecrated, but that’s never gonna come up again, so don’t worry about it, no one cares.

Stepping in time with *COOL 90S BAND MUSIC* Buffy struts into the club in a dress that’s hot but like... it’s still the 90s so don’t get your hopes up for sideboob. Also Angel is suddenly here I guess???? This would be a lot less weird if he had been there in any of the establishing shots, but Joss is still learning here, I guess, and forgets (frequently) that Angel should exist outside of his love interest, especially if he’s gonna get a spinoff later.

Buffy and Angel say hi and it’s awkward and I would probably care more if I rewatched season 1 first, but you couldn’t pay me enough to rewatch that. There’s clear tension there with Buffy wanting Angel ti give more of a shit and him not getting it because he’s spent a hundred years barely being a person, and Cordelia watches because???? reasons???? I guess. Buffy goes over to flirt with Xander and dances with him and it’s literally uncomfortable for everyone because this is an aggressively clear sign that BUFFY HAS BEEN THROUGH TRAUMA AND IS NOT DEALING WITH IT AND IS LASHING OUT BECAUSE SHE DOESN’T KNOW WHAT ELSE TO DO

Like I’m not saying that makes it okay, but this scene is a cry for help from Buffy that no one responds to. And then Cordelia (my sweet love) is forced to regurgitate words from Joss telling Buffy to ‘get over it’. Uh huh, yeah sure Joss, she’ll get right on that you dick.

And then Cordelia gets dragged off by vamps literally right behind Buffy’s back. Like that is the most literally of literallys. And she finds they also have Jenny Calendar there like ????? did they just snatch her and no one gave a shit???

Okay, okay, moving on, Buffy heads home-ish and finds the dug up Master grave which like... is in the middle of a regular cemetery and seems like it should have been fucking noticed by someone???? Whatever, all adults in the Buffyverse (except Joyce) suck I guess

AND THEN. Fucking then we cut to Willow saying Buffy has to be possessed for her weird sexy dancing with Xander. Instead of, y’know, the fact that she’s dealing with a lot of trauma and coping in shit ways and no one cares. Willow, I love you, but you’re not a great friend. Like straight up***.

Xander (a garbage boy wrapped in moldy taco shells****) tries to argue for a second before agreeing. Giles does try to point out that Buffy’s dealing with some trauma (which he has at no point directly addressed with her cause his spine is made of marshmallows and paperclips), and then Buffy shows up and says the Master’s bones are gone and everyone else forgets that she’s dealing with some massive shit. Cause wow, they might be in danger.

ACTUALLY I wanna point out a thing here where Buffy’s like ‘this is slayer stuff, no civvies’ meaning no Xander and Willow and like... given the response he has to Willow being in danger later, his response of getting super pissy now This is gonna be my first

FUCK YOU XANDER HARRIS

FUCK YOU AND YOUR GARBAGE PRIORITIES

FUCK YOUR CRUSHES AND FUCK YOUR ONLY DECIDING GIRLS ARE WORTH CARING ABOUT WHEN THEY’RE DIRECTLY RELATED TO YOU

ahem

Anyway

Snyder says some weird stuff and we move on.

We go to the library for RESEARCH FUN TIMES. Giles reads some prophecy thing saying they need the bones of the Master to bring him back and the blood of whoever was close to him when he died. Huh that’s interesting phrasing, or is it. A rock crashes through the window with a bracelet attached that Buffy immediately identifies as Cordelia’s (why do you know that’s hers Buffy? why do you know that bracelet?). It’s threatening and says come to the Bronze and is deffos a trap, but Buffy goes anyway cause fuck you not-dad

Buffy goes out to kick ass and I believe in her. Angel shows up and is all dark and brooding and no one cares, Angel. They don’t make out cause Buffy can do better and she heads into the Bronze (also there’s terrible foreshadowing about them fighting later and I hate it don’t look at me). Okay a lot of meta could be written on Buffy and Angel talking there but I don’t wanna do it

The trap isn’t for her surprise. It’s for Giles and Willow who were close to the Master when he died. Buffy realizes this and goes back to try to help them and gets there too late and Xander makes me hate him forever. He says he doesn’t know what Buffy’s issues are (there are a lot of them would you like a list fuckboi) and he doesn’t care (and yet he continues to call himself Buffy’s friend) if she had worked with them for five seconds (uh what five seconds? before or after she gave you all the info you had and then went to deal with literally the only lead) and he says, and I fucking quote “If they hurt Willow I’ll kill you”

Suck my giant dick Xander Harris. Maybe you’re a teenager and you’re stupid, but still. that is not the kind of threat you make to a friend, let alone one who fucking weekly saves your selfish entitled ass

I get this is supposed to be a moment where we’re shown he cares about Willow, where there’s a hint there might be chemistry there, but all this comes off as is spiteful and Joss Whedon shoving it in our faces that Buffy is wrong

She’s wrong for feeling her feelings

She’s wrong for not immediately getting over the trauma and hardship Joss fucking Whedon wrote her into

She’s wrong for not immediately knowing what to do to make things better

In case it’s not obvious, I hate this and don’t accept it, but LET’S PRESS ON SHALL WE

Xander actually takes a second to fucking explain why they took the people they did. We cut to Buffy torturing the one vamp who attacked her before (no one’s ever gonna touch on the morality here. like ever. like what the shit guys fucking Supernatural handles this better). Then we go to some... ceremony to probably resurrect the Master. Buffy plots with Xander and Angel “I’m gonna kill them all, that oughtta distract them”*****

And then I guess the ritual almost happens????? There’s not super much threat. The anointed baby runs away and Buffy eventually kills everyone. There’s some cool fight moves, I guess. And Xander and Angel are vaguely helpful, but they mostly let Buffy do everything

Buffy then goes to smash the bones of the Master and FUCKING FINALLY gets to have an emotional moment. Angel comforts her (he still doesn’t deserve her but like at least he gives a shit so... that’s good, I guess, better that literally everyone else here******) . And everyone else looks on and thats???? really weird???? Like there’s no emoting in any of the faces and it just feels v strange

We go to the high school the next day???? and Cordelia talks to Jenny Calenday briefly. Then we go to Giles and Buffy, who (because Joss Whedon secretly hates her which is my thesis for this project btw) says she made all the goofs. All of it is Buffy’s fault you guys. She did everything wrong. Wow. What a concept. Wow. Can you believe it. Because I can’t. I literally can’t wowzers.

Buffy goes to class and... has a moment with Xander and Willow I guess???? They saved her a seat so... everything’s fine now??? idk what the fuck the emotional conclusion we’re supposed to get here is so

Whatevs

FINAL THOUGHTS: All in all, this episode did have an important emotional arc for Buffy and isn’t a bad season opener. It didn’t introduce the main villains, but it did deal with significant wrap ups from the previous season and alluded to some potential conflicts down the road.

*My ‘fuck Xanders are largely as a result of a later ‘fuck Xander viewpoint’ but I think it stands

**For the record, I don’t like Angel. I don’t like the Angel/Buffy relationship. BUT I will give Angel points where he gets them. And right now, he gives the most of a shit about Buffy, so he’s doing decent, not great, but decent in by books

***Buffy and Willow both tend to be iffy friends when there’s a significant other involved. It’s a recurring thing and it’s not great.

****I am legit giving Xander more of pass now because he’s a teenager. He should still know better than to be the intensely shitty shit that he is, but he’s 16 now. This will change in later seasons

*****Okay but how does no one notice or give a shit that Buffy’s dealing with some stuff. She’s 16. This is fucked up, fuck Giles, fuck the watchers, fuck Angel, fuck all of it

******Not to detract from the moment but Buffy’s definitely standing on a box here like. Sarah Michelle Gellar is tiny and David whatshisface is a giant

#diana hush #diana liveblogs buffy #liveblogging #btvs #mostly nonsense #if people like this i'll do more #i just have a lot of feelings and opinions about buffy #i hope no one following me likes xander harris cause hoo boy #i am not kind to him

[nbcreepere]

Beauty and the Stinky Boi (Remus x Reader)

(Before hand, this book is on Quotev and Wattpad. It is by me and I'm posting the chapters I have on here for people who want more Remus x Reader. I only have 4 chapters so there will be 4 chapters in this and after I will post the chapters individually. It has the same name on here as it does on Wattpad and Quotev. Enjoy.)

CHAPTER 1

       I met Thomas a while back when he ran into me at a park. He was recording some sort of video and was walking backwards colliding into me. After that we decided to hang out. I found out he was a creative person who couldn't help but love Disney and theater. He was also a great singer. After a few months of being his friend he showed me his sides. When I had watched the videos on them it was... well weird. I knew there was a creative, feelings, logic, anxiety, and lying side, so when he said he wanted me to meet them, I was confused. Weren't they just him in costumes but with different voices? I went inside his house and he asked if i was thirsty. I politely denied hoping he wouldn't be upset. He walked to the living room and had me sit down. "Ok so, are you ready to meet the others?" He asked with a smile. I can't lie, I was scared and was hoping he wasn't crazy. "Yes I am..." I tell him. Soon the people from his videos rose up and were right in front of me.

       There was the prince, the anxiety, the dad, the teacher, and the snake dude. That's was the only way to describe them. The dad dude was the first to talk."Hiya Thomas! What's new!" His voice was filled with happiness. "Well, Patton," I caught the name of the dad and did my best to remember it, "I brought my friend (y/n) and wanted to introduce you guys!" Thomas exclaimed in a happy manner.  Patton looked over as though a puppy had done something adorable and waved,"Hi (y/n), I'm Patton!" He gave this big smile and I was still shocked that they were real. I soon stuttered out a hi. "The name is Logan." The teacher told me. His hand was extended for a hand shake and I excepted. The prince came over and gave a slight bow."I am Roman." He said in a royalty tone. The one in a hoodie just stayed on the stairs and told me his name."It's nice to meet you Virgil..." I went ignored as he popped in some head phones. The snake dude and Thomas were arguing but I didn't mind. "Just say 'Hi I'm Deceit' and you can finish it off with how you want." Thomas' words would only come to me slowly and piece by piece, leaving some words out. Soon the snake dude came over to me. "Hello, I am NOT Deceit, I WILL talk to you more so please, DON'T leave me alone." He said. I was confused by this and then Thomas explained it. "Well, that makes more since now." I giggled.

       "Now listen (y/n), there is some one else... but, you wouldn't like him." Thomas tells me. I look at  him with my eyes filled with confusion. "What do you mean?" I asked. Roman joined in. "Trust me he is a horrible man, the Duke that is. You wouldn't like him... None of us do..." He snarled. "I might like him..." Roman, Thomas, and the others looked at me in shock. "You like him?" Roman asked with venom in his voice. "Well yeah, everyone deserves a chance to be liked... no matter who they are..." I looked down some what knowing how it felt to be not liked. Roman slightly scoffed at me. "Fine, I won't say I told you so." I nod at his words of a some what warning."I'm ready to meet the Duke." I say with confidence...

CHAPTER 2

       "But who will take you? I sure wont." Roman said turning away. Deceit grunted and walked over."I'm NOT going there so you may NOT come with." He told me. I stood up and nodded. "Just remember (Y/N), if you need or want us to come get you just walk out of his room and call one of us, I'll even come to get you and I'm scared of that place." Patton said. "I will, but I will also try to know Duke before I judge." Virgil has turned around and wont look at me, Roman is obviously angry, Patton is scared for me, and Logan just looked at me saying,"He can't harm you unless you let him, and he's not even that scary." Patton calmed down at Logan's words. I nodded and told Deceit I was ready to go. He grabbed my wrist a little too hard, but soon we were in what I believe is the mind palace. "This is the dark sides part of the palace, that is why it is NOT complacently dark and gloomy." He says. He then points to the end of a hall on my right. "The very last door is his... I'd say knock and step back... he's- well, we aren't use to company."

       I started to walk off and down the hall. I was filled with dread and a seance that i should run away, but I still went on words. The deeper I went into the hall the messier and grosser it got. The smell of it all burned my nose and I wanted to vomit. I put my shirt over my nose to some what block the stench. I finally reached the door and did the normal three knocks to get the persons attention and then took a step back. In a minute the smell went away and I was able to take my shirt off my nose. The door swung open and revealed a man with a mustache and a gray/grey (It's spelled both ways and don't know what one to put so sorry!) streak of hair. "What do you want Dubb-" He stopped realizing that I wasn't who he thought I was. "Who are you?" He asked. "You are the Duke right? I'm (Y/N). I came to meet you." He looked at me up and down trying to find something. "Yes, I am the Duke... who sent you and why? Is it pity? Did they do it out of pity?" He asked becoming upset. I shook my head," No, I wanted to meet you and get to know you. They actually told me that I shouldn't and wouldn't like you, but I thought I should give you a chance..." The feelings I had before were slowly getting worst until he grabbed my wrist and dragged me into his room.

       I was now standing at a desk and staring at papers and different things that were crafted by hand. I picked up a few papers and looked at them. They were crudely drawn and were a little disturbing. I put them down and switched it out for the stitched creepy animals. "This is a lot of my works! Some things need more blood, some more violence." He said. I looked at him putting the idem down."What side are you, exactly?" I asked. He looked up and I could tell he was hiding his sadness because only a hint of it showed. "I'm creativity! Well, I'm the dark twisted thoughts and well, you've seen some of them." He said trying to sound confident. I looked down at the drawings again and it all came together. "Why don't the others like you?" He some what walked off and he still answered the question."They don't like me because I'm not a good thing. It's why I was alone for so many years, and why I decided to have a sudden out burst." I nodded my head knowing how it had felt. "I understand where you're coming from." He looked at me shocked but had tried to hide it fast."How?" He asked.

CHAPTER 3

       I looked at him and debated on weather or not to tell him. "I... I'm sorry I haven't even told Thomas yet... I'm not fully comfortable with it..." I said apologetically. I could tell he was looking at me just dying to know. It was quiet for  few minutes then he spoke up. "What's you're most disturbing thought?" He asked. "Well..." I stared to go on and on with it and he would jump in and give better ways of doing it. I could tell he got comfort from talking about dark things and he relaxed a lot more. He started talking about ideas he had and wanted Thomas too do, but was shut down each time. "I've seen you've drawn some and made others. I think they are... well..." I started thinking of a good word to say without hurting his feelings. "Terrible, horrific, nightmare educing..." He started. I cut in again to finish."No, I would say I find them interesting. This right here," I got up and went over to the table picking up a drawing I saw earlier. It was of a zombie unicorn. I showed him it and finished."I really like it." He smiled and I thought his face would crack in half with how big it was.

       We talked for a few hours and I noticed the time. "I hate to leave, but I have to get home for dinner. How about we hang out more?" I asked."That would be fun! I've never had a friend to hang out with besides D and Emo, but Emo doesn't visit any more." He said. "Ok then how about... Monday's and Friday's?" I asked. He looked at what I think was a scheduled and set it aflame. "Yeah! My schedule's cleared for everyday now!" I giggled at his joke. "Ok then. I'm gonna go hang with the others tomorrow if you want to join." I told him and he was fast to reply."I'm not allowed to... but I'll try for you." I gave a smile and said bye. Once I was out the door I called for one of the sides. Patton came down gave me a bear hug and got me out. He pushed me back when we were in front of the others. "Are you ok? Did he hurt you? Did he hold you captive? D-" I stopped the worried Patton an told him I was fine. "All we did was talk and get to know each other. We decided to hang on Monday's and Friday's, and I can hang with you guys any other days." Roman was shocked, and Thomas was scared but had a scene of hope. "If everything goes well he might leave me alone without all those thoughts... I'm fine with you two hanging on those days, but if he does anything then Roman can handle it." Thomas said. "Yes I will!" Roman stated loudly.

       Logan rolled his eyes."(y/n) will be fine. Remus has a new friend and wont bother losing said friend because he doesn't have any." I was about to correct him, but my alarm went off. "I'm sorry Thomas I have to go. My roomie just finished dinner and if I want it warm I have to go now. See ya tomorrow?" I asked. "Yeah, tomorrow will be fine! See ya!" He said leading me to the door. Once I was out he said bye one more time and I walked off. My house wasn't that far from his. It was four blocks away and I honestly liked the walk back to my house.

CHAPTER 4

        I woke up ate and headed to Thomas'. Once I was let in I saw there was a big fight. Remus was clutching something in his hands and Virgil and Roman were yelling at him. "What's going on?" I asked Thomas. "Well... Remus came and wouldn't tell us why he was here, so Roman and Virgil started yelling at him to leave and now are in a big fight." He looked over at the three. I went over to stop them. "Ladies, ladies, you're all pretty! Please stop fighting now!" I say loud enough for them to hear. "He is here and we don't want him here!" Roman and Virgil said in union. "You should let him stay and give him a chance." I calmly say. They started arguing again and Remus told them to stop."I'll leave..." He then turned to me and I was honestly confused. "but I need to give (Y/N) back the rose key chain she dropped in my room." He said handing it to me. I looked at it baffled. I had gotten it from my mom, who got it from her mom, and it went far down the line. We called it the Rose of love because It always fell off when our forever lover was near and they always picked it up and gave it back. It happened to all of them and now it was happening to me.

Soon Remus left and I sat on the couch pondering if what just happened was real. "Uh, (Y/N)? You seem out of it... is something wrong?" I looked up and wanted to tell Thomas so bad, but... the others I didn't want to tell just yet."I-I..." I was somewhat shaking and was having trouble. I soon pulled out my phone and texted him saying I would tell him, but wasn't ready to tell the others. After he received it he nodded and asked the others to leave for a few minutes. Once they left he sat down and asked again. I told him the whole story."This key chain has been in my family for years... my mom gave it to me on my sixteenth birthday. She then told me the stories and gave me the book that had everyone's story. The stories usually start with the Rose falling off of the lady. After it falls off the forever lover, as we call them, picks it up and finds us. For my mom, hers fell of in a public place and my dad only found her by a gut feeling. She knew it was hers because of the engraved words on the back 'The Rose of Love' and the fact it had the last name of its first holder in my family." Thomas sat there and continued to listen.

       "I just have a sliver of trust in their stories and never thought it to be true. I have looked over how the Roes could fall off and had great explanations, but... yesterday I had it stuck on to my belt loop. It's been stuck on it for a year. It fell off in his room... It was a mess and I would have though I would have noticed it gone. It was in his room and he brought it back to me." I finished. He looked at me somewhat questioningly and asked,"So do you think Remus... is you're true love?" I looked up knowing I wasn't ready for real love, I was only twenty-six. Yeah everyone else was ready but not me. "I...I don't know..." He gave me a reassuring hug and let me stay like that for a while. "I don't know what will happen if it's a true story... and if it's not true... I would have fallen for the hoax of my family." I said in a slight whisper. "Well... what do you want to do about the others? Do you want me to tell them, do you, and if you do fall for him and he hurts you I'm here, I'll always be here for you." His words were calming and I felt safe. I pulled back and told him,"I know what they think of him... I'd rather not let them know, but thank you."

#fanfiction #romance #remus sanders #remus #remus x reader #remus sanders x reader #sanders sides #sanders sides x reader #Beauty and the Stinky Boi