Grow.

Natasha: Here you go Y/n. I got them all the shapes that you asked.

Y/n: Thanks Nat! I love you 💗

Bucky: Those balloons are for Y/n? Aren't you grown up like an adult now?

Y/n: How do you expect me to grow if you won't let me blow?! 😠

Natasha: That's.... awkward.

Bucky: I..I don't have problem with that.😶

Natasha: You asked, she answers, she's not wrong. Come on Y/n. Let's go blow your balloons.

Y/n: Can we ask Steve too?

Natasha: Of course we can. He would like very much to blow too. *middle finger to bucky behind you.

Bucky watch you walk away: What on earth...??

Y/N: Pots and pans aren’t supposed to melt right?

Natasha: No

Y/N: Okay so this happened

Y/N, holding up a melted pan: Weird, right?

Natasha: It’s impossible, congrats!

Clint: Nat is even wearing her formal leather jacket.

Natasha: It’s the one without any blood on it.

tony: *arrives in the afterlife*

natasha: he's freaking out

loki: he's not freaking out

natasha: people tend to freak out

loki: trust me, he's fine

natasha: okay mister i've been dead longer and know everything

Look.

Y/n cheerful: Hey guys, guys.. Look what's Bucky did to me!

Natasha: What is it honey?

Bucky flip your hair: Ta - daaaa!!

Natasha shock: You pierced her ears?!!

Bucky: Yea!

Natasha: YOU PIERCED HER EARS?!!

Bucky smiling: I know right. Doesn't it make her head looks smaller.

Natasha: How could you do this without telling me?!!

Bucky: If I told you, it wouldn't have been a surprise.

Tony: I think she looks cute.

Natasha: *glaring

Tony: ...but I am wrong *hands up in surrender.

Steve: Buck, when you gotta go, you gotta go. Good luck pal.

Taglist: @mycosmicparadise

Avengers Gc

🕸Nat: Hey guys guess who I found making out👀

*😝Y/N has left the chat*

*🕷Peter has left the chat*

👨‍🏭Tony: BAHAHAHAH

👴Steve: Wait- Seriously?

🦅Sam: AHAHAHAHA

⛈Thor: Those midgardians are cute.

💄Wanda: I agree with Thor, what about you vis?

🤖Vision: yes, I agree with Wanda and Thor.

👴Steve: I swear to god.

Sam: How do I deal with my enemies?

Bucky: Kill them.

Sam: That sounds a little extreme. I was hoping for something a little more passive?

Natasha: Dismember them.

April fool’s with Natasha

Y/n : You scared the shit out of me! I thought you were actually pregnant!

Natasha : Babe, it was an April fool’s prank. And we’re lesbians.

Y/n : It’s not April first today!

Natasha : When you’re married to an idiot, everyday is the first of April.

The Breakfast club

 *Y/n,Peter, Wanda, and Pietro walks into kitchen talking, and sit at the island*  

Steve turns around wearing an apron: Mornin kids, what do you want for breakfast?  

Wanda: can we get some cooked chicken fetuses, with...  

Pietro: some cow juice  that has been acidification, coagulation, separating curds and whey, salting, shaping, and ripening.

Peter: with some of Peppa’s scraps.

Y/n: Raw toast and some Citrus sinensis piss.  

Steve: 

Steve: W-what  

Nat who walks in to her kitchen staring at her phone: eggs, *points to Wanda, still looking at her phone* Chess, *points to Pietro* Bacon, *points to Peter* Bread and orange juice * she points to you, looking up from her phone, with a smirk of question.  

Nat: To sum it up for you, they want breakfast sandwiches. 

Steve looks at the four: I am Confusion  

Everybody: Gasp

i miss her so much im gonna cry :((

Cop: You’re receiving a ticket for having three people on one motorcycle.

Steve: Shit.

Bucky: Wait, three?

Cop: Yeah?

Nat: Sam fell off.

Steve: And you didn’t bother to tell me?

Natasha and Y/n discuss chocolate

Y/n : I can’t believe you never told me! If I knew I wouldn’t have married you.

Steve : Uh, what’s going on?

Y/n : Natasha is only now telling me that she prefers white chocolate over dark chocolate. We’ve been married two years!

Natasha : That’s rich coming from you, considering you prefer dark chocolate which is just dehydrated dog shit at this point.

Y/n : You take that back!

Me: *notices I can't download anything anymore because my gallery is full*

Me: oh well let's delete some unnecessary pictures then....

Me: *sees my gallery only consists of pictures of Natasha Romanoff and Scarlett Johansson*

Me: oh well, there's nothing I can delete. Guess I won't be downloading the super important app that I need for school.

Sam: What’s your favourite horror movie?

Steve: IT

Nat: Saw

Bucky: Teletubbies

Natasha: I bet you’re wondering why I gathered you here today. It’s because we need to have a discussion about how some people in this room aren’t getting along with other people in this room.

Steve: Why did you say that so vaguely? Tony and I are literally the only people you called in here.

Y/N: You often use humor to deflect trauma

Nat: Thank you

Y/N: I didn't say that was a good thing

Nat: What I'm hearing is, you think I'm funny

Fury: I need you to kill someone but make it look like it was of natural causes.

Natasha: Say no more.

[Later]

Fury: I thought I told you to make it look like he died of natural causes.

Natasha: But he died of natural causes.

Fury: You pushed him off a roof.

Natasha: Gravity is natural.

Bruce: It is possible that I have feelings for Natasha.

Y/N: *You arch an eyebrow and pause* Congratulations! Welcome to the real world, you're the last to know, if you stop by the awards booth we'll give you your prize.

Bruce: Wait... what?

*Tony Stark makes a stellar appearance at the new Avengers facility*

Y/N: Oh, no... I think I'm in trouble, and that trouble is called Tony.

Natasha: Trouble in the "I want to kill him and I need you to help me hide his corpse" sense, or in the "I'm madly in love with him" sense?

Y/N: The latter.

Natasha: Sorry, the first option would have been easier.

*After having committed a stupidity*

Y/N: I'm an idiot.

Natasha: *silence*

Sam: *silence*

Y/N: *watches them with a frown*.

Natasha: If you're really waiting for us to say otherwise, it's going to be a long wait.