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moonbeamsung · a month ago
You’re Just a Boy in a Blueberry Field
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No fruit is sweeter than a summer love.
member: haechan
au: blueberry farmer!haechan x gn!reader
word count: 5.0k
genre: fluff, very light angst
warnings: mentions of food
author’s note: It’s here! I actually wrote most of this last summer, but only recently did I find the time to edit and get it ready to be posted. I added some parts and changed a few things, and now I like it quite a lot, so I hope you do as well! Thank you @astroboy-lele​ for beta-reading :) As always I would love to hear any feedback on this, and I hope that you enjoy the fic!
taglist: @astroboy-lele @kyuwoyo @rvse-hvvck @nakamotocore @kisshim @leejunini @chicksung @mrkcore @radiorenjun @moon-jun @jisungiest @stayctday @byutafy @jujubean23 @treasurehobi​ @bluejaem​ @lyshoonn​ @vera-liscious​ @allegxdly​ @cupfullofjeno​ @thats-a-jen-no-no​ @yo-ddream​
network tags: @kpopscape @neo-constellations @culture-cafe @dreamlab-nct @k-dinernet 
Thank you lovely Ana @rvse-hvvck for this additional header!
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Donghyuck knows everything there is to know about those blueberries.
Without even pausing for the briefest of moments to think, to instinctively recall the information instilled in him throughout his childhood spent on the farm, he can answer any question that’s thrown at him. He can point out just the right color of berry to pick so that they’ll be ripe when you eat them later. Likewise, he can also tell you which ones are best to eat now, as you pick them, pretending not to notice when you pop one or two into your mouth and grinning when your eyes light up from the sweetness.
A day comes where he, filled with mischief as usual, places a not-so-ripe blueberry into your hand, and you, being so wrapped up in the peacefulness of the morning that surrounds you, fail to notice its red color and don’t think twice about lifting it to your lips, biting into it with your teeth. When the tart taste meets your tongue, your face contorts into an expression that elicits a raucous fit of laughter from him. You’re the first one in the fields that day. When the sun had risen on the horizon, the fleeting touch of color in the sky that dawn left behind still lingering above, he had been there, sitting on the front porch as always to greet customers.
Donghyuck knows every bug that loves to rest on the branches of the blueberry bushes. After spending so much time next to you as you scan them for the pops of vivid blues and purples that are hidden behind jade green leaves, he begins to learn that you are not fond of any bug, no matter how harmless. It’s cute, he thinks, how you inspect every berry that you drop into your basket, fearing that some small creature is lurking on it. If you do find something, he hears a small noise of both surprise and disgust before you fling the perfectly good berry away from you. It also hurts a little, knowing that it’s one less for you to take home.
When more people arrive at the farm after you, he’s forced to leave your side and get them started on their own search for the delicious fruit that’s nestled among the branches of nearly every bush. And if they ask where the best ones are, he specifically points them in the direction of the fields where you aren’t. It isn’t a lie, really, because they’ve had a good harvest everywhere this year.
...Okay, so maybe it’s a little selfish on his part, but who can blame him for wanting you to have some of the most plentiful bushes all to yourself?
Wednesdays are his favorite because it’s always the least crowded of all the mornings they’re open for business, and he can spend more time following you as you make your way down the rows, admiring the focus on your face and the way that you sometimes pause mid-reach, closing your eyes and standing still as the sun peeks through the clouds and casts its warm glow down onto the farm. A gentle sigh tumbles from your lips, darkened by the violet nectar that remains from the countless blueberries that have crossed their usually pink-tinted threshold. You resume your search after a few seconds, catching his eye and returning a smile he didn’t even know was there.
He makes the berries taste a little sweeter when he’s next to you. The purple juice that stains your fingers is a little darker. The sun feels brighter and warmer than ever, its heat shining down onto your skin.
One particular morning, after you finish picking all the blueberries you can carry, you decide to accompany Donghyuck on the porch, sitting beside each other in matching rocking chairs that first belonged to his great-grandparents, the farm’s founders. The familiar sounds of birds chirping and the low mumbling amongst customers meet your ears. You both gaze fondly at the horizon while immersed in casual chatter, all the while tending to several families as they come and go.
Whenever a car turns off of the two-lane, paved road and onto the noisy gravel path leading into a small grassy area that functions as a parking lot, Donghyuck excuses himself from the lively conversation both of you always find yourselves sharing. He stands, brushing his hands off on his faded denim overalls that are only slightly too large for his frame. His hand lifts up the baseball cap he always wears while the other runs through his hair, and your gaze falls on the back of his neck where it rests in longer strands. You always wonder why he keeps it like that since he complains about how hot it makes him feel. The humid summer air is stifling enough as it is, after all. The thought vanishes only moments after it arrives, though, and he flashes a brilliant grin at you over his shoulder as he descends the wooden stairs leading down to the patio.
Today, a happy looking family gets out of a shiny silver minivan. The mother and father with two kids, a boy and a girl, make their way toward the covered patio and Donghyuck bounds down the steps like always, grabbing 4 stacked pails in his calloused hands. You lean forward a little in the creaky old rocking chair, your weight in your toes, ears just barely picking up his conversation with them. He greets the parents warmly, shaking their hands and then he kneels down to be eye-level with the small children. The little boy seems shy as he clasps his fingers in front of him, thumbs twiddling back and forth, while his sister is clearly the opposite. She skips over to the much taller boy, saying hello.
“Do you two like blueberries?” He asks them, one arm resting on his knee and the other extending a pail out in front of him. The young girl nods enthusiastically before she takes the container from his hand and turns around, passing it to her brother as he nods, making eye contact with Donghyuck for the first time. A small smile grows on his face when he’s met with the wider one of the unfamiliar but still welcoming stranger. His sister speaks up again, “Every Friday we get to help Mom make her famous blueberry pie!”
“Is that right?”
“Yep! In the morning we always go to the supermarket and get fresh blueberries,” she explains. Her mother leans down, softly telling her that this week they’re here to pick blueberries instead, fresh from the farm they were grown on.
“Really? So that means we’re not buying them at the store anymore?”
“Well, honey, today we can pick enough blueberries to last us for a whole month’s worth of blueberry pies.”
“And besides,” Donghyuck starts, still kneeling on the ground next to her, his boot leaving an imprint in the dirt underneath it, “it’ll taste even better since you picked them yourselves, don’t you think?” The boy punctuates his question with a wink.
The young boy steps up for the first time, grin stretching even wider as he finds the courage to happily agree with the wise words. Exclaiming eagerly and in a way that only a child can, he takes his sister by the hand that’s not holding his small bucket before scurrying off, their parents close behind after grabbing pails for each other as well as a third that their daughter had forgotten in the midst of the excitement.
As Donghyuck joins you on the porch once again, you can’t help but smile as you remember how he interacts with each and every customer that passes through the weathered fence surrounding the property. When he talks to kids in particular, his eyes seem to light up, and you see just how much of a kid he still is deep down. His playfulness never fails to make an appearance whenever you spend time with him.
You’re thankful for the moo of a cow in the distance that interrupts his question of why you’re smiling like an idiot and hopefully drowns out the steady sound of your pounding heart.
The next week he tells you that the rest of his family is out of town, and he’s been left with the responsibility of running the farm all on his own. He usually does most of the work himself these days anyway since he’s getting older and more mature, although some of his jokes say otherwise. You miss the way his mom would poke her head out of the upstairs window of the main house, calling out a greeting to you both from across the property, overjoyed at the sight of her son spending time with the particular customer he’s mentioned so many times before. Whether he would share an amusing anecdote of yours with his siblings at the dinner table or point out something that reminded him of you, it was far too easy for her to figure out how he feels about you.
In an effort to spend more time with him, keep him company and just help out in general, you offer to stay at the house with him for a little while. Or at least until his family gets back from their trip, and to your delight, he agrees. You arrive in the late evening, on a day when the fields are closed, just in time to catch the setting sun as it disappears behind the trees and power lines that seem to stretch for miles in the distance. Tugging an overnight bag of belongings with you, you knock twice on the wood of his front door.
It opens swiftly and Donghyuck welcomes you inside, wearing an apron that he must have outgrown 10 years ago, at least. You snicker at the snug choice of attire and he shoves your shoulder, though not with enough force to make you stumble. He whines a little in that saccharine-sweet voice of his that makes your heart clench, but you don’t give in. Not this time.
When the farm is closed for the day, the family has a chance to pick from some of the bushes that are planted in a more secluded area, all to ensure that they also have a big enough supply of the fruit to last them for the season. So Donghyuck had woken up at the crack of dawn, although you aren’t sure why. He had made his way downstairs and out into the dewy air of the morning, gathering just enough blueberries to bake a cobbler that night when you came over, since he’d learned it was your favorite treat after hours of conversation about anything and everything. The recipe comes straight from his great-grandfather, he informs you, and it’s written on a yellowing piece of paper in handwriting that you couldn’t read even if you tried. He, however, can somehow decode the seemingly nonsensical swirls and lines on the page. You suppose it’s part of the magic of the family recipe that gets passed down with it.
Donning an apron yourself, you join him at the sink as you begin washing the berries, gently grabbing a handful at a time as you let the tap water clean them. When you both reach into the large container at the same time, your hands brush and you almost scoff at the swell of your heart that you feel inside your chest.
As you’re working together to make the batter that you will soon pour into his mother’s finest glass baking pan, Donghyuck briskly swipes his fingertip on the side of the bowl where the mixer had splattered the combined ingredients, extending it in your direction. You raise an eyebrow at the boy and said fingertip before turning your head away.
“If you really think that I would lick that off your finger, then you’re terribly mistaken.”
Coyly, the mischief-maker in question retorts back as you glance at his impishly delighted expression. “Are you sure?” 
“Positive,” you state rather firmly, but matching the mirth in his eyes with a glimmer of amusement in your own. “I’ll settle for the spatula, thanks.”
“Suit yourself.” Donghyuck rolls his eyes, your answer completely expected. At least he tried. 
You won’t deny that you enjoy sampling a bit of the batter of a dessert as much as anyone. But not that much.
Left with no choice, he takes himself up on his own offer and sticks his finger into his mouth with an audible ‘pop,’ exaggerating the action just to get a rise out of you, feeling the upward curl of his lips when you react ever so slightly with a silent chuckle.
You’re adding the last bit of flour to the mixture when you accidentally get some of the powdery substance on your hand in the process. Turning the automatic mixer off, you momentarily forget about your stained skin and you make the mistake of wiping your face with the back of your wrist, smearing the white stuff on your cheek. Donghyuck notices, of course, and an innocent attempt to help clean up the mess only ends with the two of you blushing like crazy.
“Let me help you,” he speaks up.
“Don’t be ridiculous, the pan’s not that heavy, and even if it was, I’m strong enough anyway—”
You’re about to pick up the glassware but his sudden strides over to you from across the large kitchen cause everything you were saying, doing, and thinking to come to a complete stop. You’ve never really had a problem with personal space before, but right now he’s leaning down and his face is so close that you’re afraid to even breathe for fear that the action might just throw you off balance and towards him. For fear that you might not push his chest away with your hands if that happens.
He’s bending his knees to match your eye level and his hand lifts from its place at his side, hovering in midair not far from where the flour still lingers on your skin. His eyes had been so focused on the stain but the shrinking proximity between you and him pulls his gaze from your cheek to your eyes, blown wide and confused because you still have no idea that there’s something on your face.
The undoubtedly palpable tension in the room almost reaches down his throat and pulls the words from his vocal chords in an effort to dispel the heavy air circulating around the both of you.
“There’s… uh… you have flour…”
Donghyuck still hasn’t broken the less than comfortable eye contact, but he’s unable to look away for reasons unknown to him. After an agonizing amount of seconds your brain switches on again, albeit slowly, and you’re able to properly process the position you’re currently in. Your own hand starts to lift and though the movement is slight, it’s enough to draw his eyes down to it and he finds the strength to complete his goal at last.
His thumb swipes across your cheek and without even thinking he pops it into his mouth once again, forgetting about the unpleasant taste of flour. The way that the boy’s face scrunches up when the bitter powder meets his tongue doesn’t eliminate the awkwardness completely, but it’s a start. You hastily make an effort to avert your gaze as you frantically wonder if he caught your face that’s surely as warm as a blazing fireplace, all because he did the unthinkable with that stupid finger of his.
You won’t let yourself dwell on how his hand is just the right size to cradle the side of your head, or how much nicer his lips look up close, or how they must taste like the blueberries that he snuck into his mouth as you made the cobbler, or how you wished he had used his lips on your cheek instead of his thumb.
How you wish he had closed the almost nonexistent distance between your flushed faces.
These thoughts do nothing to ease the steadily growing heat that’s currently taking over your skin. Your eyes land on the glass pan and you take the opportunity to grab it, acting as a sort of distraction for your mind and also as something to snap you both out of your embarrassed hazes.
You get the finished dessert into the oven with no trouble after that, and now you have a little over half an hour of time to kill before it’s ready, so Donghyuck leads you into the nicely furnished family room and plops down onto the plush couch. When you don’t immediately follow he glances up at you, sensing that you’re still hesitant after the awkward moment. He smiles softly and almost apologetically, as if he’s sending a silent signal that you’ll both move past it soon enough, an invitation to put the incident behind the two of you. And you accept it.
You take a deep breath before you sit down next to him, sinking into the cushions underneath and behind you. The material dips slightly under the weight of both your bodies and gravity itself seems to be in control as it pushes you together, shoulders bumping and the sides of your legs being pressed up against each other. Thankfully, the television roars to life with the laughter of a live audience on one of your favorite shows, and you exhale a puff of air you didn’t even know you were holding in. With every scene that lights up the large display, you curl up further and further into his side, his arm migrating across the back of the sofa and winding around your shoulder only a few centimeters at a time.
This feels like home. Donghyuck feels like home.
The buzzer of the oven interrupts when you’re halfway through another episode, prompting you to jump to your feet just as abruptly as the alarm-like noise had started blaring. Consequently his arm flops down by his side as he mentally curses the loud intrusion into what had become a comfortable atmosphere, an atmosphere that was finally surrounding you again after what felt like an eternity but had really only been an hour.
In no time, you’re returning from the kitchen, the warm blueberry contents of the cobbler oozing out onto the flowery pair of plates you had grabbed from the cupboard. Handing one to him and setting the other aside for yourself, you quickly go back around the corner to grab two tall cups of cold milk. Your second time joining him on the couch comes more easily, almost all of the earlier tension having dispersed into the room, wafting out the windows along with the delicious scent of the fruit baked into the sweet, flaky crust. In fact, you’re fairly sure that it’s strong enough for even his neighbors down the road to smell. Which reminds you: you need to package some up to deliver to them tomorrow, per Donghyuck’s suggestion.
You’re most definitely sure that he smells the aroma, of course, because it’s hard to ignore the eagerness with which he takes a large bite of the dessert. “We make better bakers that I thought we would,” the boy comments, taking a sip of milk. The white mustache that it creates above his top lip when he lifts the glass to his mouth is enough to make you giggle, and you’re unaware that this predictable reaction was his objective all along. He grins, rather satisfied.
With your stomach now full, a head-plaguing drowsiness begins to set in. It slowly fills your senses enough for you to drift off, fork nearly falling out of your hand and onto the floor before he catches it, along with your weight when you slump down against his shoulder. Donghyuck is barely able to reach one of the end tables, and he sets the dishes and silverware down next to the now empty cups. Your body unconsciously clings to his like a koala to a branch, with both hands clutching one of his arms and a leg hooked over his thighs.
He takes one look at you and wishes he could pause time, to stay here forever. It’s not every day that he meets someone who can easily match the amount of snark he possesses. Simultaneously, you also balance out the friendship you share with your compassion and sense of wonder about the world, always evident in your morning routine when you come to the fields. Donghyuck has noticed that you bring out those same qualities in him, perhaps more than anyone else ever has. And just like you’re holding him right now, he vows to hold on to you.
As much as he doesn’t want to get up and for the evening to progress, he knows he should, that it has to. So he manages to detach from the hold of your limbs, gently pushing himself up and off of the couch so he doesn’t disturb you.
Glancing at the large antique clock above the doorway that leads out into the hall, Donghyuck realizes it’s much later than he thought. He decides to turn in for the night, but on a regular day he usually finds himself still awake well past midnight, despite the need to wake up early the next morning and run the farm from the crack of dawn.
Since you’re tired and he doesn’t want to risk you waking up alone in an unfamiliar bed and place, he comes to the conclusion that he’ll join you. Only leaving your side for a moment, he puts the cobbler into the refrigerator and turns off the kitchen lights behind him as he goes. Softly padding halfway up the stairwell, Donghyuck makes sure there’s enough light for him to see where he’s going before making his way back into the living room one last time. He tucks one arm underneath both of your bent knees as tenderly as he can, and places the other behind the middle of your back, hand gently curling against your waist. He carries you with probably the most delicacy he’s shown in his entire life.
Going upstairs is generally an easy task, but doing so while carrying another person is a different story. He would never forgive himself if he were to hurt you in any way. If even your foot happened to bump the wall next to you, a burst of frustration at himself and his own carelessness would surface regardless of the impact’s intensity
Your position in his arms gives him yet another opportunity to gaze upon your peaceful expression, and he begins to think more deeply about what you are to him. Looking forward to your visits makes his work so much more enjoyable and worth it. You’re someone who truly appreciates what he and his family do for a living and you faithfully support them with your business as a customer whenever you can, which is a rare thing to find in most people that come. Most are just bored and in need of something to occupy themselves or their kids. Sometimes they don’t even pick that many berries. But you always make sure to bring your own basket, which holds just as many as if not more than the ones the farm provides, and fill it to the brim. In his eyes, you’re special.
Amidst the mostly-asleep state that you’re in, your eyes just barely open far enough to see a blurry picture of Donghyuck’s face as he carries you through the house and up into the bedroom he had suggested you share. He sets you down onto the soft mattress before pulling the covers up to your stomach, retreating into the attached bathroom to quickly change into a thin t-shirt and his favorite pair of plaid pajama pants.
The memory of that conversation floods back to you. Initially, you refused the offer, saying that he would rest better if he had more space to move around. But being the clingy person he is, he had pouted desperately as you struggled to stand your ground in the discussion. “Fine,” you had huffed, only half-frustrated with those doe eyes he always uses to get his way, and your lips had great difficulty holding back a smile.
The hum of electricity that can be heard emanating from the next room snaps you out of these thoughts, and is enough to wake you up a bit more. Your gaze scans the surroundings for a minute or two before he opens the door again, his eyes now looking as heavy as your own.
Donghyuck joins you under the blanket and shifts to lay on his side, facing you. It’s funny that you’re both able to adjust to a situation so intimate and new almost instantly. Still on your back, your head turns and you’re conscious enough to raise an eyebrow at the boy. There’s that pout again.
“Please?” He mumbles, his bottom lip jutting out in an action he’s perfected. You know exactly what he’s after: cuddles.
You don’t even try to hide the playful roll of your eyes as you scoot a little closer, but it’s not close enough for him. He gets impatient, meeting you halfway, and this time it’s him that flings a leg over yours. An endearing, small noise of contentment from him fills your ears as you take notice of his arms, now interlocked behind your neck and around your shoulders. You melt into the snug position, a hand landing on his forearm that’s laying across your chest. Turning ever so slightly to the side, your other hand winds around his middle and eventually rests just above his hip, pulling him into you even more. Donghyuck nuzzles his face into the side of your neck, a few strands of your hair tickling his skin as he sighs in complete and utter bliss.
Determined to savor the moment until the irresistible inevitability of slumber starts to overtake you once more, you fight to stay awake with all of your might. But in what you thought was only the blink of an eye, the glittering stars visible through the bay window’s sheer drapes morph into the pale golden rays of first light. There’s a soft murmur of your name along with an unintentional, almost imperceptible peck to the place where his lips meet your skin, and you’re wide awake. Not to mention a little shocked.
He’s utterly unfazed, though, slowly waking up now that the sun has gotten brighter, its beams filtering into the room and hitting his already glowing face that becomes a gorgeous honey-colored hue.
Donghyuck reluctantly withdraws his arms from your form after one last embrace, effortlessly rising from the wrinkled bed sheets and offering his hand to you when you start to do the same. A sleepy smile makes a home on his features and he reminds you of your task to deliver a portion of the dessert you made to his next-door neighbors.
That’s exactly what you do, first making yourselves presentable in the bathroom by smoothing down wild bed hair and freshening up your faces with cool water. Being around to see each other’s natural morning states is a major act of trust, and he doesn’t miss an opportunity to poke fun at you for it.
“How long does it normally take for you to do your hair every day before you come here?” His tone is dripping with feigned innocence, but the sly grin on his lips says otherwise.
“Shut up, Hyuck.”
Tupperware container in hand, your shoes step in rhythm with his as you amble along the grassy shoulder of the street together. Somehow you end up hand-in-hand by the time you reach his neighbors’ front patio.
“Donghyuck!” The elderly woman at the door greets him with a twinkling voice, her husband coming into view soon after. “Look who it is, honey,” she motions fondly to the boy who they both once knew to be much shorter and younger, but now is all grown up before their eyes. “You’re getting so tall. It seems like only yesterday you were scurrying through the blueberry fields and waving to us through the gaps in the fence.”
“Yes ma’am, it does,” he responds politely. The couple has been living there for as far back as he can remember, and quite honestly they feel as if they’ve become part of his family, too.
Her warm brown eyes light up. “Is this the customer your mother was telling me about last week? She mentioned how close you’ve become, and now I’m finally seeing it for myself. You make a lovely pair.”
“Oh—” Donghyuck startles. Not much can get him flustered, but he hadn’t exactly been anticipating for his mom to recount all the things he’s said about you to the sweetest and most innocent of elderly couples. Of course they would assume that there’s something going on.
Not that there’s anything wrong with that, with you. He wouldn’t mind at all, really. He’ll just need to have a word about a little thing called privacy with his mother later.
You see the glint of panic in his eyes and speak up. It’s not often he makes such an easy target for teasing. “Thank you,” you state graciously, the smugness in the statement only noticeable to him. “We’re very happy together.” He feels you lean into him, fingers unwrapping from his and gripping the other side of his waist. You know exactly what you’re doing, and so does he.
Almost forgetting to hand over the slices of cobbler you’d cut earlier, Donghyuck nudges you to do so, and the four of you exchange thanks and farewells before you’re on your way back to the farm.
“Happy together, huh?”
“Shut up, Hyuck.” You mumble something else afterwards that he doesn’t quite catch.
“What’s that? Didn’t hear you,” he sings, stopping in his tracks. You do the same. “Shut up and what?”
“...And kiss me.”
After many days and many nights spent wondering, you can confirm that his lips do, indeed, taste as sweet as the blueberries in those fields.
144 notes · View notes
armysantiny · 2 months ago
쿤 (Kun)
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Pairing: Kun x male reader
Genre: angst, timestamp
Includes: Chenle mention, breaking up, restaurant, taking the taxi home, moving on
Word count: 394
Warning: surgery, health condition
Rating: 12
Tagging: @kwritersworld​, @kdiarynet​, @kpopscape​, @ultkpopnetwork​, @kpopficsnetwork​, @kpopcontentcreatorsclub​, @k-dinernet​, @lovesick-net​,  @neoswitchnet​, @nct-writers​
An: Love Fools~
“I’m sorry Kun, I never wanted to be with you, we should meet other people.” Was that it? Him and y/n were over, just like that? It had to be a joke, it just had to be. Breath shaky as he kept his eyes trained on the table, the ever so obvious disbelief etched onto his face. Reaching out to hold y/n’s hand just one more time, Kun retracted his hand when y/n got out of his chair, collecting his things and heading out of the restaurant.
It was hard to let him go, and y/n’s heart ached as he took the taxi home. He knew that he loved Kun, but with his surgery fast approaching - and his chances not looking good - y/n didn’t want to see the person he cared about crying over him. It would be better if Kun moved on and forgot about him.
Oh, who was he kidding? He missed him already.
While y/n was being prepped to go to surgery, the rest of his friends kept the patient company, Chenle reaching for his phone. “You need to tell Kun y/n, he deserves to know this much at least.”
“Chenle-” The younger stopping y/n from continuing, Chenle left the room to talk to Kun, waving to y/n as he entered the operating room. Hanging up the call and putting his phone away, he took his seat with the others, praying silently that everything would turn out okay. Turning his head a few minutes later, the group all raised a brow as Kun paused to take a breath, clearly having ran the entire way.
“What’s wrong with y/n? Why is he in the operating room? Why don’t I know about this?” Firing off multiple questions, Kun started to let his train of thought get the better of him, only calming down once Dejun brought him to sit down and offered to explain y/n’s complex health situation. And it hit Kun like a brick wall. For two years, y/n refused to show any signs of ill-health, and his ‘family visits’ must have been hospital visits instead... Gosh he wished he noticed the signs sooner. 
A few hours later, the surgeon walked out to let y/n’s friends know about the status of the surgery, a neutral expression on their face. “Y/n is stable, but we’re unsure when he’ll wake up.”
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armysantiny · 2 months ago
루카스 (Lucas)
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Pairing: Yukhei (Lucas) x female reader
Genre: fluff, timestamp
Includes: neko reader, cat form, NCT, movies, sitting in his lap, comparing heights, falling asleep
Word count: 282
Warning: n/a
Rating: PG
Tagging: @kwritersworld​, @kdiarynet​, @kpopscape​, @ultkpopnetwork​, @kpopficsnetwork​, @kpopcontentcreatorsclub​, @k-dinernet​, @lovesick-net​, @neoswitchnet​, @nct-writers​
An: Love Fools
The rest of NCT saying that y/n and Yukhei were like a kitten and puppy was one thing. When y/n revealed that she was in fact a neko - a cat hybrid - that was another thing entirely. He went from teasing her about her habits to showering her in affection, wrapping her in his arms whenever he could, especially when y/n decided to stay in her cat form for any length of time. Watching a movie with y/n, the idol had his girlfriend in his lap, semi-awake as she played with his hands.
“Yukhei, why are your hands so big?” Ears perked up and eyes wide with curiosity, y/n measured her hand against his, her mouth falling open as she noticed the difference. “You make me look tiny.”
Amused, Yukhei paused the film and watched as y/n pouted, his smile growing; it was too cute. “Baby, you are tiny.” Turning her so she was facing him, the taller of the two held y/n’s face in his hands, giggling. “Tiny kitten~”
“Wong Yukhei I am very healthy average,” y/n started, her pout falling into a smile - you couldn’t stay sulky around Yukhei, it was a fact - as she looked him in the eye, “you’re just...a giant.” 
Muttering something about him being a ‘lucky human...’, y/n let herself rest against his chest, her eyes slowly shutting on their own. Resuming the movie and running his hands through her hair, Yukhei pet just behind her eyes, chuckling when he felt paws instead of small hands. Picking her up and laying her on his lap, he pressed a light peck to her forehead.
“You take your cat nap baby, I’ll be right here~.”
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armysantiny · 2 months ago
정우 (Jungwoo)
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Pairing: Jungwoo x gender neutral reader
Genre: fluff, timestamp
Includes: bad day, nct 127, dorms, visiting Jungwoo, established relationship, comforting Jungwoo.
Word count: 264
Warning: n/a
Rating: PG
Tagging: @kwritersworld​, @kdiarynet​, @kpopscape​, @ultkpopnetwork​, @kpopficsnetwork​, @kpopcontentcreatorsclub​, @k-dinernet​, @lovesick-net​, @neo-constellations​, @neoswitchnet, @nct-writers​
An: Love Fools~ (And let’s all remember Jungwoo isn’t all sunshine and rainbows 24/7)
Jungwoo wasn’t having the best day, and having to maintain his bubbly, cheerful persona for the entire day was really weighing on him. Sighing heavily as he arrived back at the dorms, Jungwoo walked into his room, grabbing his phone and scrolling through social media. Laying on his back, his attention was caught by the front door to the dorms opening, and multiple voices greeting...y/n? His interest piqued, he sat up, about to leave his shared room when his door opened.
“I heard someone was having a bad day~?” Y/n asked, closing the door behind them and chuckling when Jungwoo pulled them into a hug and hid his face in the crook of their neck. Staying like that for a while, y/n ran their hands through their boyfriend’s hair, a hum in their voice.
“Today was hard, wasn’t it?” Their question met with a nod, y/n smiled, pulling out of the hug to hold Jungwoo’s face in their hand. “You worked hard today Woo, I’m proud of you.”
“How did you know..?” Leaning into y/n’s hand with a relieved sigh, Jungwoo let his curiosity ask the question for him. Not that he was complaining, far from it in fact. Just seeing y/n was enough to lift his spirits. And he was feeling much better.
“Chicago boy texted me when you were on your way home. I figured giving you some company would help. Did it?” Y/n replied, pulling Jungwoo to sit with them on his bed. Joining them, he laced his fingers with theirs.
“It helped so much, thank you y/n. I needed this.”
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armysantiny · 2 months ago
해찬 (Haechan)
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Pairing: Donghyuck (Haechan) x male reader
Genre: fluff, timestamp
Includes: freelance reader, younger reader, staying over, schedules, articles, iced coffee, dramas, falling asleep
Word count: 277
Warning: n/a
Rating: PG
Tagging: @kwritersworld​, @kdiarynet​, @kpopscape​, @ultkpopnetwork​, @kpopficsnetwork​ @kpopcontentcreatorsclub​, @k-dinernet​, @lovesick-net​, @neo-constellations​, @neoswitchnet​, @dreamwritersnet​
An: Love Fools~
Sitting at his computer as he finished writing up the last part of his article, y/n’s face brightened when he saw his phone ring, Donghyuck’s name on screen. Taking his attention away from the screen and picking up the call, the freelancer greeted his boyfriend with an audible smile.
“Hyung! Did you finish your schedule for today?”
“Mhm~ and I haven’t got much to do tomorrow, so... do you mind if hyung comes over?” From the other end of the line, Donghyuck had been lying on his bed, fresh out of a shower and in the mood to do something other than spend the night playing video games. Getting the ‘green light’ to visit y/n, his mood brighten tenfold and he immediately went to get his coat and shoes after the phone call ended.
Waiting for Donghyuck while he scrolled through his phone, y/n sipped on his iced coffee, a grin on his face when he heard the knock at the door. Setting his drink to the side, the younger male skipped his way over to let his boyfriend in.
“You really should just tell me the code y/n-ah.” Donghyuck whined as he walked inside, his pouting soon replaced by a smile when y/n handed him his drink. Pecking the younger - and shorter - male’s lips, the older of the two followed his boyfriend to the sofa, cuddling up close. Turning on a drama, the couple stayed like that, a comfortable silence in the apartment. When y/n had started falling asleep, Donghyuck carefully removed the drink from his hands, letting the exhausted boy rest his head on his shoulders.
“Get some rest y/n, you did well.”
24 notes · View notes
armysantiny · 2 months ago
양양 (Yangyang)
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Pairing: Yangyang x gender neutral reader
Genre: fluff, timestamp
Includes: college au, class, calling Yangyang ‘baby’, nicknames
Word count: 274
Warning: n/a
Rating: PG
Tagging: @kwritersworld, @kdiarynet​, @kpopscape​, @ultkpopnetwork​, @kpopficsnetwork​, @kpopcontentcreatorsclub​, @k-dinernet​, @lovesick-net​, @neo-constellations​, @neoswitchnet​​
An: Love Fools (The reference to that one clip of Yangyang and Ten tho-)
Looking to the sky as they waited for Yangyang to finish his last class, y/n swung their legs as they sat on one of the campus benches. Their own classes had finished around an hour ago and they had promised the hyperactive younger student that they would grab a bite to eat after the school day was done. Scrolling through their phone for the duration of his class that was left, they put the device away when Yangyang’s giggles started getting louder, until the 20-year-old was beside y/n, tugging their arm.
“Hello to you too ‘Yang, you ready to go? Or do you need something before we head out?” Y/n asked, their hands in their pockets as they stood up. Shaking his head, Yangyang jogged on ahead, reaching the gates before y/n had a chance to catch up. Shaking their head with a smile, y/n couldn’t help but laugh.
“Baby? Baby wait up~ baby wait up!” Y/n teased, laughing when Yangyang actually stopped and waited for them.
“Baby’s stopped!” Turning around to see y/n walking up to him unable to control their laughter, he giggled, tilting his head. A hand on their chest as they tried to calm themselves down, y/n ruffled his hair.
“You just admitted you’re a baby, you realise that right?” Y/n commented, walking off school grounds, Yangyang right beside them. Shrugging and fixing his bucket hat, the younger of the two thought little of it. Although he would adamantly refuse to be called baby, it felt...different when y/n said it. It wasn’t teasing if it was from y/n, but more of a term of endearment, and it made his heart happy.
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radiorenjun · 3 months ago
cigarettes || kim doyoung
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➶ pairing: kim doyoung x reader
➶ genre: angst, established relationship
➶ word count: 2k
➶ synopsis: You and Doyoung keep having arguments because of your occasional smoking habit. To you, it’s just a cigarette. To Doyoung, it was more than that.
➶ warnings: swearing, arguments, shitty writing, mild ANGST, half-assed fic, character death, mentions of cancer, smoking addiction, smoking, mentions of drinking, bad reputation in high school
➶ a/n: big thanks to @lebrookestore for making this EXQUISITE HEADER
➶ based on the song Cigarette Duet by Princess Chelsea
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“It’s just a cigarette and it cannot be that bad.”
You rolled your eyes at your boyfriend, pulling out a cigarette from the package and a lighter from your back pocket. “Honey, don’t you love me ‘cause you know it makes me sad,” Doyoung frowned, crossing his arms over his chest with furrowed brows as he watched you walk to the balcony, lighting the cigarette up without a care in the world, ignoring his glare from across the room. 
Doyoung was worried for you. You had been starting to smoke cigarettes whenever you were too stressed as you, just like him, didn’t like to talk things out. You didn’t think much of it considering you were only smoking a few a week, but Doyoung had a far greater worry in his mind. He didn’t want you to get an addiction because of something utterly stupid. 
“It’s just a cigarette like you always use to do,” you rolled your eyes, taking a deep puff from the small tube. Doyoung grimaced at your words, letting out a small inaudible hiss under his breath . He turned his face away to avoid your eyes, sighing heavily. 
“I was different then, I don’t need them to be cool,” he answered rather hesitantly, his pupils avoiding your own as you let out a soft scoff at him. 
You both knew deep down Doyoung was only worried because he was scared that you were going to fall into the same dark abyss as he did back when the two of you were still in high school. Doyoung was previously a smoker himself. He hung out with the wrong crowd. He did many bad things in his youth, he did a lot of things he knew he shouldn’t. He was the first one in your relationship to start smoking, he had a really bad smoking addiction back then just for the sake of impressing his former so-called ‘friends’. 
And one of the biggest mistakes in his life was encouraging you into trying it as well. Of course back then you weren’t that interested but you did try it out under his encouragement, and ever since then you would take a few small puffs whenever he would offer it. But recently you had decided to try it out when you were at a bar at one of the frat parties near your community college, a couple months after Doyoung finally got over his smoking addiction. And now you couldn’t help but smoke a cig or two a week whenever the stress of college and work piles down on you. 
Doyoung sighed as he got up from his place on the couch to walk and join you on the balcony, wrapping his arms around your waist with a small pouting frown on his lips. He leaned his chin down on your shoulder and his head against yours, the sadness in his pupils sending small jolts of pain into your own heart. 
“I know, it’s just a cigarette but it harms your pretty lungs,” Doyoung mumbled against the fabric of your thin white shirt. (which happens to belong to him) You purse your lips, blowing out a puff of smoke as you look down at the view bestowed upon the two of you, eyes gazing up a the cloudy night sky. 
“Well, it’s only twice a week. So there’s not much of a chance,” you nuzzled your head against his lovingly, ignoring his puppy dog eyes boring holes into your skull as he watched you take another puff from the white cigarette. “I know, but one can turn into ten, y/n. You know that very much,” Doyoung pouted, tightening his hold on your waist as he moved his head to lean his cheek on your shoulder, pressing a small kiss to the space between your ear and jaw. 
“Honey, don’t you trust me? When I want to stop I can,” you reassured him, making both of your heart aches as he grew silent at the statement. 
That was exactly what he said back when he still had his smoking addiction. 
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“It’s just a cigarette!” you exclaimed.
Another pointless argument, another night of the two of you screaming at each other until your throats were sore. 
You were tired. Doyoung was tired. But you knew Doyoung wouldn’t stop complaining about it until you stopped smoking. And today he had found out that you had moved on into a more harsher brand of cigarettes, clearly he wasn’t happy at all considering it was way more addicting than the brand you were using previously.
“‘It’s just a cigarette’? It’s malboro light! This is going too far, you’re going to stop smoking permanently whether you like it or not!” Doyoung shook his head at you, his eyes glaring daggers into your own as you clenched your fist and gritted your teeth in anger. “It’s not that big of a deal, Doyoung!” you shot back, “ I don’t know why you’re blowing this completely out of proportion!”
“I’m not blowing this out of proportion. This is going to go downhill if you don’t stop. And even if I am overreacting is one measly cigarette really worth it if we end up fighting again?” Doyoung retorted, his expression filled with disbelief at how stupid you were being. Why can’t you just listen and try to stop? Your smoking count had gone up from two per week to five a day and it was getting way out of hand.
You groaned out of frustration. “I’m not going to argue about this again. I’m tired, it’s almost midnight. Can’t we just go to sleep and talk about it some other time?” you pleaded, wishing that Doyoung would drop the conversation again until some other day. Unfortunately for you, unlike the other days, Doyoung had enough of avoiding this conversation. He didn’t want to watch you walk down to your own death in his very own eyes.
He was in your position once too, you were just too stubborn to listen to him. He didn’t want you to go to the extent of smoking two large packs a day like he did back when the two of you were still in your first year of college. It broke his heart to see the person he loves the most slowly ruin their pretty lungs and the only thing he can do is try to convince you to stop every single day.
“No. This has gone on way too long and way too far, this is going to grow into a bad habit sooner or later. And you know very well that I don’t want you to get an addiction. Where the hell did you even get it? For fucks sake, it’s already bad enough that you’ve gone from 2 a week to 5 a week, it’s not healthy, y/n. You know that,” Doyoung rubbed his face with his palms, trying to calm himself down to keep himself from screaming his frustrations out. “It’s only a cigarette I got from Jamie Lee,” you huffed under your breath, looking down at your sock-covered feet.
Jamie Lee was one of the girls in your class who was quite infamous for bringing about scandals and terrible rumors as if they were handmade chocolates. If Doyoung wasn’t upset then, he sure is now. “Jamie Lee? You got a cigarette from fucking Jamie Lee?” he asked incredulously, removing his hand from his face to stare at you with wide rage-filled eyes. He was begging you to tell him that you were just joking, you were just pulling on his leg to ease the tension between you like you always do during arguments.
But no, you weren’t. The guilt in your eyes said it all.
“I’m going to give her a smack one day, dear god.” Doyoung groaned, pinching his nose to take a deep breath before continuing your argument that lasted until you decided to walk off to take a cig outside of your shared apartment at 2 am in the morning.
Doyoung stirred, his head hurt, and he wondered why he felt so tired despite the fact that he had just woken up. When he finally decided to open his eyes, pulling the blankets off of his body as he moved his feet off the bed. Yawning, he scratched the back of his head, hissing in pain when the pain in his head got worse.
‘It’s just a cigarette and I only did it once, Doyoung’
‘It’s just a cigarette and soon it’ll be ten, Y/n.’
He stood up from the bed, grimacing at the empty feeling in his chest as he made his way to the kitchen to get himself some water. Getting himself a cup of water, he stared hopelessly out of the window in front of him before walking over to the fridge, he scanned his eyes to see if he could make anything for breakfast with whatever condiments that are left. Rubbing the sleep away from his eyes, he let out another yawn before grabbing a carton of eggs.
‘It’s only twice a week, so there’s not much of a chance’
‘It’ll make you sick, Y/n. There’s not much of a chance.’
He felt tears gather up in his eyes when the silence in his ears became too loud, the empty feeling in his heart turning into a feeling of pain and despair. He rubbed his eyes before walking over to the balcony, trying his best to ignore the aftermath of his hangover. Raising a hand to give his temple a massage, he grabbed a lighter from the table near the balcony door and pulled out a cigarette packet from one of the drawers.
Lighting it up quickly and taking a deep puff, sighing heavily as he exhaled the smoke, feeling the empty ache in his chest decrease as the bitter smoke overpowered the throbbing ache in his heart. He wiped his eyes as he tapped the ashes on the ashtray nearby, his pupils dilating when he realised he hasn’t cleaned it in a while.
‘It’s just a cigarette, I’m sorry that I did it.’
‘It’s just a cigarette, you’ll be sorry that you did it.’
It’s been a couple of weeks since you passed away from lung cancer. Doyoung couldn’t even be there to tell you ‘I told you so’. He blamed himself for not trying his best to stop you. He blamed himself for your death. If only he didn’t encourage you to try your first cigarette back then in highschool, maybe then you’d be too scared to try one from someone else’s encouragement. If only he tried hard enough, if only you weren’t so stubborn.
If only you had listened to him. Maybe then you would still be by his side watching him cook. Maybe then he wouldn’t be sitting on the balcony with a cigarette in one hand and alcohol in the other, maybe he wouldn’t be so sleep deprived. Maybe he wouldn’t be feeling such a wretched ache in his chest. Maybe then he wouldn’t try so hard to hate you for bringing him into another smoking addiction.
“Honey, can’t you trust me? When I want to stop I can.”
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56 notes · View notes
armysantiny · 3 months ago
천러 (Chenle)
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Pairing: Chenle x female reader
Genre: fluff, timestamp
Includes: Daegal, work, early morning shift, afternoon naps, phone call, parents, radio show
Word count: 381
Warning: n/a
Rating: PG
Tagging: @kwritersworld​, @kdiarynet​, @kpopscape​, @ultkpopnetwork​, @kpopficsnetwork​, @kpopcontentcreatorsclub​,  @neo-constellations​, @neoswitchnet​, @dreamwritersnet​
An: Love Fools~
Y/n had had a tiring day, and was more than ready to get some well deserved rest. And that’s what she planned to do the second she had gotten home from an early shift that started at the oh so wonderful time of three in the morning. Checking her phone to make sure that there was nothing planned for the next few hours, y/n sighed in relief when her schedule was pretty much empty. Setting her phone aside and giggling when Daegal ran to her feet, she pet the small dog before heading to her room to get some sleep.
Waking up from her afternoon nap, y/n was greeted by Daegal on top of her, pawing at her abdomen. Laughing as she pulled herself up and brought the small dog into her lap, y/n played with Daegal’s ears, tickling just behind them. Carrying hers and Chenle’s pet dog with her to the living room, she picked up her phone, unplugged it and took a picture, sending it to Chenle. 
“Daegal-ah, do you think your dad’s going to like the picture?” Y/n asked the tiny pet, while she got her food ready and went to make something to eat for herself. A parental smile on her face as she watched Daegal, y/n sat down to eat, checking her phone and calling her parents. Talking for a while, her attention was drawn to the door opening, Chenle walking in with a grin on his face. Quickly saying goodbye and hanging up the call, y/n waved from the table, a laugh falling from them when Daegal sped over.
“Someone’s missed you~ how was your day?”
“It was alright, we hosted the radio show, filmed some content and spent some time with the dreamies.” Chenle answered, walking up to y/n and wrapping his arms around her. “How was your day baby?”
“Oh don’t get me started; I honestly might ask management to move me out of customer service. Do you know how it feels to have someone talk your ear off?” Y/n replied, sighing and turning around to kiss her boyfriend. Returning the kiss and pulling her gently towards the living room, Chenle wrapped her in a hug.
“Awe baby, you worked hard today. Nap?”
“I already did, but another nap wouldn’t hurt, would it?”
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armysantiny · 3 months ago
쇼타로 (Shotaro)
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Pairing: Shotaro x female reader
Genre: fluff, timestamp
Includes: idol reader, late night dance practice, Make A Wish, SM Entertainment, Johnny mention
Word count: 290
Warning: n/a
Rating: PG
Tagging: @kwritersworld​, @kdiarynet​, @kpopscape​, @ultkpopnetwork​, @kpopficsnetwork​, @k-dinernet​, @lovesick-net​, @neo-constellations​, @neoswitchnet​
An: Love Fools~
Walking through the halls of SM late at night after the rest of her group had headed home, y/n wanted to get some more practice in before her group’s comeback. Putting her now empty water bottle in the bin as she walked into the larger practice studio, y/n stopped when she saw Shotaro stretching in the corner by the mirror. Closing the door behind her, she chuckled.
“Shotaro! You staying to practice too?” She called out, waving when he turned around, a smile on his face as he pulled his hoodie down. Jogging over, Shotaro went and greeted his senior, hiding his face when she reached up to ruffle his hair. Perhaps she had a soft spot for the recently-debuted NCT member, although it could just be that she saw him like a little brother. He brought out her motherly instinct, not that she was complaining.
“Gosh you’re cute - let’s get started shall we? Why don’t you teach me the choreography to Make A Wish?” Y/n suggested, plugging her phone into the speakers. Getting into position to start the chorus, y/n joined the younger male and watched as he explained the steps. Following along and laughing at her mistakes, y/n cheered when she finally got the steps.
“Hey, I did it!” Watching y/n’s enthusiasm, Shotaro couldn’t help the butterflies that started in his stomach. Giggling and starting the music, he put it to just before the first chorus and the pair got into position. Dancing along until the song finished, the two artists took a breath when the track ended. The door opening and Johnny walking in, he lent against the wall.
“Look at you two. If I didn’t know any better, I see a connection~”
“Sunbae!” “Johnny hyung!”
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armysantiny · 3 months ago
재현 (Jaehyun)
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Pairing: Jaehyun x female reader
Genre: fluff, timestamps
Includes: sick fic, sick reader, pain killers, sore throat, convenience store, blanket
Word count: 337
Warning: light swearing
Rating: 12
Tagging: @kwritersworld​, @kdiarynet​, @kpopscape​, @ultkpopnetwork​, @kpopficsnetwork​, @k-dinernet​, @lovesick-net​, @neo-constellations​, @neoswitchnet​
An: Love Fools~
Waking up with a groan, y/n felt hot. And bleary. And dizzy.  She was sick; there was no denying it. Hauling herself up and dragging her feet to bathroom to try and make herself look somewhat alive, her phone buzzed with a call from her boyfriend, Jaehyun. Answering the call after turning the tap off, her voice was hoarse.
“Morning Jae, did you sleep alright?” From the other side of the line, as he was making breakfast, Jaehyun was concerned. Setting his cereal aside, he went to get his jacket.
“Baby, are you sick?”
“Mhm. I feel like the Grim Reaper’s knocking at my fucking door right now. Why?”
“Don’t worry. I’ll be over in a bit, okay?” Hanging up the call before y/n got the chance to refuse his offer - she didn’t want to pass on whatever it was she had - Jaehyun had jacket and shoes on and was already out the door. Leaving the apartment building and heading to the pharmacy, he bought a few boxes of painkillers, some red ginseng and snacks before walking to his girlfriend’s house, buying some snacks from a convenience store on the way.
Curled up on the sofa with a blanket, some mint tea and a drama on screen, y/n took small sips of her drink when she heard the door open. With barely any any energy to move, y/n looked towards the door, sticking her hand out of her blanket cocoon. Laughing, Jaehyun sat down beside y/n and pulled the blanket away from her face.
“Jaehyun~~ you didn’t have to do this. What if you get it too?” Y/n asked, pouting as her boyfriend helped her take the medication, setting out the snacks and heading to the kitchen to make her something to eat. Insisting on needing no help, the brunet made y/n some porridge, bringing it to her on a tray with a cheeky smile.
“Your porridge ma’am~ to help get your medication down.”
“What would I do without you Jae? Thank you so much~.”
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moonlightjeno · 3 months ago
it seems to be, no the world has gone dark. absolutely completely pitch black, the moment ashes and guns are fired. the world’s been dark since 6 am this morning when the sun was too tired to come out and gift the dammed world you lived in. and now almost three am and the only light you think you’ll ever see again are the burst of fire and guns that go off around you and stars bright above. 
the shadows at your fingertips are no longer lashing out, they have stopped concealing the children behind you all so tired, eye dropping but too scared to sleep or do anything but stare. you’re in plain sight, out in the apocalyptic world that has become your home city because some people harbored one different gene. 
the darkness surrounded you in a day you had lost your light. heart breaking in pieces you’d thought you had manage to piece back together, but the world continued to rain in ash and glass. until the time seemed to stop, and your heart was racing legs burning eyes forcing to stay open. but it would be worth it. worth it, when you saw a mess of black hair, coming out of the subway tunnels. worth it when in the time between putting the kids away and something else you were in his arms, wrapped around you strong and alive. 
you looked up at the boy before who held the light of galaxies in his eyes, a small smile creeping up onto his features turning them into crescent moons. 
shallow cute and bruises littered his face and arms, but when he spoke the world seem to fall into place if only for a minute, for a second because your light had come back. 
“didn’t think i’d leave you here all alone did you?” his voice was slightly rough, but loving all the same and you couldn’t help but laugh ever so slightly. 
“and leave me alone to deal with the dreamies? never jeno. never. you can’t get rid of a shadow that easy”
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a/n :: idk what this is, but i really want to get back to writing and i’m currenlty watching way to much x-men so this was vaguely inspired by that. this might become a bigger piece but idk for now. enjoy this mess lmao. <3
21 notes · View notes
armysantiny · 3 months ago
마크 (Mark)
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Pairing: Mark x gender neutral reader
Genre: fluff, timestamp
Includes: idol reader, established relationship, practice, recording, eating out,
Word count: 269
Warning: n/a
Rating: PG
Tagging: @kwritersworld​, @kdiarynet​, @kpopscape​, @ultkpopnetwork​, @kpopcontentcreatorsclub​, @kpopficsnetwork​, @k-dinernet​, @lovesick-net​, @neo-constellations​, @dreamwritersnet​, @neoswitchnet​
An: Love Fools~
Being in a relationship with an idol wasn’t easy. Being in a relationship with another idol was harder. But y/n and Mark made it work. Just how they did it, no one really knew, but as long as the pair were both happy, who cared? Finishing up practice with their group members, y/n sat against the wall of the practice studio, a water bottle and their phone in hand. Taking a few breaths to recover from the copious amounts of dance practice, they called their boyfriend. Thankfully - and by some coincidence - their schedules lined up fairly well.
“Markie~ did you finish recording? I’m free for the next hour or so.” Y/n asked, an enthusiasm in their voice. No matter how exhausted they were from practice, simply listening to Mark’s voice gave them energy. His enthusiasm was infectious, and there was no mistaking it.
“Mhm! We’re done for today!” Mark replied, and y/n could hear the grin in his voice. “Free for the hour? Hmm, why don’t I meet you at your agency and we’ll grab something to eat? I’m sure you’ll need to eat after practicing~” He continued, already aware of y/n’s tendency to diet. Agreeing over the phone, the couple continued the conversation until y/n needed to grab their stuff to head out.
Eating their food together, Mark rambled on about how his day had gone, while y/n watched with an endearment in their eyes. How they managed to get into a relationship with such a sweetheart, was beyond them. All they knew was that they were in love, and they never wanted it to end.
36 notes · View notes
radiorenjun · 3 months ago
 I Don't Need It
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• Pairing: Na Jaemin x Reader
• Genre: Angst, Comedy, Fluff
• Na Jaemin despised the idea of soulmates, he wanted to fight against fate for choosing his soulmate for him. Even if it means his stubborn childhood best friend wouldn’t stop trying to make him accept about the similar tattoos on their wrists.
• Warnings: mental breakdowns, heartbreak, rejection, major angst, arguments, flashbacks, physical injuries, fighting, underaged drinking, panic attacks, slight mentions of death. things are going to get much better from this chapter on. Or is it?
• Wordcount : 9.2k
• Masterlist here!
• Chapters: XV, XVI
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“Oh dear Lord. Na Jaemin once listened to What Is Love by Twice and took it way to heart,” Hyuck tsked, shaking his head in disappointment, earning a few threatening glares from his older friends as they watch the lovesick boy sulk in his seat on the lunch table. “What? Am I wrong?” he asked, lifting a brow at them with an innocent shrug. 
“Fuck off, Hyuck,” Jaemin groaned, waving his friend off as he stared back at his phone screen with an empty expression. “Damn, Captain out here using the government name. What’s up with him?” Younghoon asked, walking up to the sulking boy with a towel over his shoulder, passing the cloth to Jeno. “He got into a huge argument with y/n the other day at the library,” Donghyuck explained, sighing as he patted his friend’s back sympathetically. 
“Yikes, I take it that it didn’t go so well?” Jihoon asked, wincing as he examined Jaemin’s seemingly lifeless state. The boy in question currently resembled a kicked puppy, his eyes held no emotion other than sorrow and heartbreak. Jaemin looked so ‘down in the dumps’ (as their coach had said before giving him a small time out) you could see his soul slowly leaving his body.
“No shit, dude. She told him to fuck off,” Hyuck hissed, wincing at the thought of his own soulmate telling him to get out of his life. “Ouch, for real?” Younghoon scrunched his nose, looking down at his captain who’s expression darkened as he looked down at his dirty sneakers. “I didn’t know Y/n could say that to the Na Jaemin, himself. Are you sure you aren’t just hallucinating things, Capt?” he asked once again, looking down at the boy before him. 
“He had it coming, really. Have you seen the awkward moments we had to go through because of how they keep pulling and pushing each other away? Damn, it was like I was watching a shitty anime adaptation on netflix,” Hyuck shook his head, tutting under his breath. Jaemin slowly raised his head up at the two boys towering over him, staring daggers into their souls. 
“I would very much appreciate it if you guys could stop gossiping about me like I’m not listening right in front of you and fuck off. Let me mourn for the rest of my life in peace, please,” Jaemin rolled his eyes, leaning the side of his face against his knuckles as he propped his elbow up on the table. “He’s got it bad, huh?” Chani commented, walking up to the boys and leaning his arm over Hyuck’s shoulder. 
“Definitely,” Hyuck agreed, nodding. 
“Lee Haechan, you’re not helping either,” Jeno rolled his eyes, crossing his arms against his chest. “Well what am I supposed to do, man? I gave him advice and all he did was just talk and do little things. Jaemin, listen, to win a girl’s heart you gotta go big or go home,” Hyuck advised with an enthusiastic tone, receiving nothing else but a heavy sigh from the said boy. 
Jeno gave out an annoyed groan, snapping his head around to look at his best friend. “So what are you going to do now? Are you really going to leave her alone?” he asked hesitantly, watching Jaemin’s sulking state carefully. Jaemin hummed, shrugging nonchalantly, pursing his lips in thought. “Well, if that’s what she wants then, I guess I have no choice,” he mumbled.
“What? Really?” 
“Look, what do you want me to do? I fucked up. I tried to fix things by small actions and waited for her to be more comfortable with me and I still fucked that up because I couldn’t be patient and time is running out. We’re graduating soon, I tried to talk things out and I still lost control of my emotions and somehow managed to fuck it up without the slightest bit of effort,” Jaemin snapped, running a hand through his hair and tugging on the roots out of frustration. 
“I get it, I fucked up. I don’t need to be constantly reminded that I lost my soulmate and I’m going to be alone forever,” he raised his hands up in defeat, groaning. “The least I can do right now is to leave her alone to have some time to herself. Maybe if I do that she won’t hate me as much.”
Jaemin was really hopeless at this point. He didn’t know what to do. He knew he had to do something to try and make things better, but he fucked up too much this time. He believed that the relationship you two have now is unrepairable. He screwed up his chances of making it up to you once again, and now he’s just going to sulk around until he gets over it. 
Jeno and Hyuck exchanged similar glances of sympathy, sighing heavily. “You can’t just give up like that, dude. You just gotta try a bit harder,” Younghoon slung an arm over the younger boy’s shoulders, giving him an encouraging smile. Jaemin pursed his lips, hanging his head with his doe eyes staring holes into his shoes before shaking his head ‘no’. 
“I can’t. I really fucked up this one, you don’t even know,” Jaemin felt his heart ache at the memory of your exhausted expression that was now engraved into his skull. The way your eyes no longer held the adoration you had for him for so long. He internally wondered why he didn’t notice the sparkles in your eyes had faded whenever he came into your line of vision. Moreover, he regretted the fact that he didn’t cherish the moments when he could gaze into the adoration you held for him in your heart. 
“I made her turn into the old me. God, I fucked up bad,” he groaned, rubbing his face with his hand in distress. Younghoon sucked in his lips, gazing up at the two boys, widening his eyes and nodding at the distressed boy beside him, gesturing for them to help him comfort him. Jeno clicked his tongue, crossing his arms against his chest as he shook his head in disappointment.
“Are you really going to give up just because of that?” Jeno deadpanned, furrowing his brows. “What do you want me to do man?” Jaemin peered up at his best friend, letting out a puff of breath. “I really don’t know what to do anymore, at this point I should just fucking give up. She won’t even give me a chance, anyway. What’s the point anymore?” Jaemin claimed, his eyes half-lidded.
He felt tired. He just wanted to go back home and sleep until his problems go away. But he knew he couldn’t. He had to do something to fix this, he wanted to do something to fix this. But he was at loss, he didn’t know what he was supposed to do. He was already on thin ice, if he fucked up one more time, he wouldn’t know what’s going to happen next. And frankly he didn’t want to think or risk it. 
“No shit, sherlock.” Jeno scoffed, rolling his eyes incredulously. 
“You repeatedly hurt her for two years straight, asshole. I wouldn’t forgive you if I were her either,” he added with a heavy sigh, shaking his head at the younger boy who just gave him a glare in return. “Thanks for pointing that out, Captain Obvious. What else do you want me to do, huh? Climb the Eiffel tower?” Jaemin groaned, slumping against his seat. 
 “Then stop fucking sulking,” Jeno scolded. “You know very well sulking about your problems isn’t going to make anything better. You know that better than anyone, captain.” 
“Don’t use the ‘captain’ bullshit on me now, Jeno. I’m not in the mood,” Jaemin looked away from his friend, his eyes scanning the lockers in front of him. “Well, you better be in the mood sooner or later. The final game’s coming up, you better get your head straight before Coach actually gets serious and kicks you off the team.” Jeno scoffed, earning glares from Hyuck and Renjun. 
That finally put Jaemin back into his rightful state of mind. He had been working for the position all throughout his sophomore and junior year, he knew he wasn’t in the best state to focus on anything right now but he couldn’t give up the position he had been working oh-so-very hard for the past two years. ‘God. What the fuck am I suppose to do?’
Younghoon sighed, placing a hand on his friend’s knee, patting it. “The two of you are literally hopeless. But I’m happy that Y/n rejected your dumb ass,” he commented with a tight-lipped smile. Jaemin turned to his friend slowly, who wiggled his eyebrows at him in an attempt to lighten the mood. “I’m being serious, by the way.” Younghoon added, retracting his hand. 
“Gee, thank you for expressing your thoughts, Mr. Huang,” Hyuck chuckled, slinging an arm around the boy’s shoulders. “Hey, hear me out first!” Younghoon exclaimed, pushing his arm off of his shoulders with a roll of his eyes. “Listen, I’m happy she rejected you because it would be pretty stupid for her to just forgive you all of a sudden despite the fact that you haven’t learned from your mistakes.” He explained. 
Jaemin furrowed his brows in confusion at the boy’s words, “what’s that supposed to mean?” he retorted in an almost offended tone. “I don’t know if you realise this yet, Jaemin. But it seems that you truly haven’t learned from your stupid mistakes. She told you countless times she doesn’t want you to bother her and you did the exact opposite. You didn’t give her any time to slowly let you back into her life,” Jihoon shrugged simply, finally gathering the courage to speak up. 
“So what you’re saying is that it’s okay for her to barge into my life doing all that soulmate crap for the past two years and I’m not allowed to do the same?” Jaemin asked, raising a brow at him as a scowl stretched across his lips. Jeno groaned in frustration, raising a hand to rub his temples to keep himself from snapping at the oblivious boy. 
“See! He doesn’t even get it!” Jeno exclaimed, rubbing his forehead as he stared hopelessly at the boy sitting down in front of him. “Dude, you can’t just walk into someone’s life after hurting her twenty-four seven for two years straight, thinking that you would be forgiven in an instant. Hell, if we were Y/n we wouldn’t even want to look at you,” Jeno elaborated, taking a step back and crossing his arms against his chest. 
“You can’t blame the poor girl for being cautious. You’re supposed to be her soulmate, the one who’s supposed to make her happy. You’re doing a shitty job at doing so, if I say so myself. If anything I’m proud of her for saying no to you so kindly, if I were her I would tell you to get out of my life permanently. You’re making her lose her trust in you even more as time goes on. Get that through your thick skull, you asshole.” Jeno spat, his eyes narrowing at the younger boy with rage glossing over his pupils. 
Jaemin’s friends always considered you as their sister, they always cared about you and they always try to defend you and Jaemin whenever they can. But they knew this was getting a little bit too far. Your graduation ceremony was coming up soon. Prom was coming up. The final game is coming up. Not to mention the finals afterwards. 
Everyone was more than beyond stressed in their own problems. And the fact that Jaemin was sulking about his problems instead of doing something about it was pissing them off to no end. The fact that the two of you were visibly hurting because of it was pissing them off. They wanted things to go back to the way they used to. But they knew things can’t end that way. Not anymore. 
The least they can do now was to try and get Jaemin’s mind to think straight again. 
“By the way you’re acting got me thinking, are you actually doing this because you’re starting to like y/n or is it because you just want to hurt her even more?” Jeno asked (almost growled), his tone lowering as he glared daggers into Jaemin’s figure. 
“Jeno, wait, you’re-”
Jaemin shot up from his seat, standing up in front of his best friend with his eyes wide in shock. “What the fuck Jeno? You know very well I would never hurt y/n. At least on fucking purpose, you know that better than anyone. Why the hell are you even saying that?” Jaemin shot back, his eyes wide in shock at Jeno’s false assumption. Jeno’s gaze remained unwavering, taking a deep breath before continuing to speak again. 
“Are you sure about that Jaemin? Because it seems to me all you’ve done so far is hurting y/n. And by what you said about Y/n not forgiving you made it sound like you’re purposely doing this because you wanted revenge against Y/n for ‘bothering’ you the past two years. Tell me, Jaemin. Are you doing this because you feel bad? Are you doing this because you actually like her? Or are you doing this because you want pay back?” 
Every word that spilled out of Jeno’s mouth was like a slap from reality. Of course Jaemin likes you! Of course he feels bad! He just said those things because he was just furious with himself. Right? He was just frustrated that things haven’t been going very well lately with your relationship that he couldn’t help but make it sound like he was only doing this for revenge. 
“Of course I fucking like her,” Jaemin shot back rather hesitantly, the anger in his eyes dissipating. Instead, sadness and confusion had taken place across his features. Truth be told, he was quite confused about his own feelings. He longed for your presence. He wanted to talk to you again. He wanted to give you soft cuddles again. He wanted to shower you with his love just like he always did back when the two of you were still kids. 
But yet again, he has been hurting you alot. No, scratch that, he’s been hurting you with every selfish step he made. Does he really feel something for you or is this his way of getting you a taste of your own medicine? He can’t possibly-
“Get your shit together, Jaemin. If all you’re going to do is hurt her, you might as well just leave her life the same way she left yours months ago. And if you want things to be on good terms again, you might want to think a bit more,” Jeno spat, walking away to his locker, leaving the boy lost in his thoughts. 
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“Well, that was surely something unexpected.” 
“I know!” you groaned, spreading your arms out on the table with a frustrated groan, covering your face with your hands in embarrassment. “I don’t know what got into me. I was on the brink of crying that day. In a library too! Thank god it was empty, oh god.” you rambled, a look of pure horror spread across your features. 
“Okay, okay. Calm down, just- repeat what you said to him just one more time,” Hyunjin coaxed, showing you his index finger. “I refuse to repeat myself, I rather bask in the cringe of my own previous words. Good day,” you gave Hyunjin a bittersweet smile before frowning abruptly and leaned your chin on your arm, jutting out your bottom as you recalled your conversation with Jaemin last week. 
Speaking of Jaemin, he hasn’t made any efforts to talk to you again since then. He stopped sending you random chocolates in your lockers and small pebbles with small doodles drawn sloppily with a posca marker. He stopped trying to make small talk with you. And considering you were now avoiding him even more than you already are, you haven’t seen him much unless you pass by the school field to go to the teacher’s office to get something. 
Were you a bit too harsh with your words? This is what you wanted right? You wanted him to leave your relationship as it is before anything bad happens to ruin it even more than it already has. But yet again, what was the point? Your relationship with Jaemin now is almost as non-existent. And you didn’t know what to feel about it.
You tugged the sleeve of your sweater down to take a peek of your hidden tattoo, a small frown on your lips as your eyes scan the small drawing that lead to all of this mess. Did you make the right choice when you rejected him? Was yelling at him a bit too far? He is your soulmate after all, maybe you should’ve given him a chance?
“Stop it,” Renjun chuckled, reaching from across the table to flick your forehead 
You grimaced, looking up at your group of friends with a perplexed expression. “I’m literally just breathing right now,” you deadpanned, rubbing the spot he flicked with a small pout. “We can hear the gears inside your head, you’re thinking way too loud, y/n.” Yeeun commented with an amused smile, wrapping her arm around yours.
“Sorry, I was just thinking about Jaemin,” you sighed, giving her a half-hearted smile. “As usual,” your friend chuckled, rolling their eyes at you. You pursed your lips, “shut up. I kind of feel guilty for what happened back at the library now.” You pulled your arm away from Yeeun’s hold with a small pout on your face. 
“Why the hell would you feel guilty? You should feel proud of yourself,” Renjun furrowed his brows, opening the milk carton he bought earlier before school had started. “I don’t know, I just feel guilty? I never really snapped at Jaemin like that before. Or anyone else,” you shrugged, picking off the chocolate from Hyunjin’s dessert box with the spoon beside you. 
“Hey! Get your own!” Hyunjin exclaimed, slapping your spoon away from his box with his own. “Stealing from a friend tastes way better, sorry not sorry,” you grinned, shoving the spoon inside your mouth with a small hum. “We’re kinda proud of you for standing up for yourself like that though,” Renjun mumbled under his breath. 
You felt your heart ache slightly at the thought. “I mean,” you pulled the spoon out of your mouth and clicked your tongue in thought. “I’m not one to back out of confrontation, so I’m kind of proud of myself for saying no as well. But I just really feel guilty for doing so, is it because he’s my soulmate?” you frowned, leaning close to take another bite of Hyunjin’s dessert.
“It’s normal to feel bad. It shows that despite everything he’s done, you still like him. Whether it’d be because of the soulmate system or because of your own feelings, you still like him. It’s normal to be angry at someone and feel like shit about it afterwards. We’re here for you,” Yeeun leaned her head against your shoulder and rubbed your back affectionately. 
You looked up, watching as your friends gave you encouraging smiles, showing you that they’re here to back you up no matter what. “We won’t be mad either even if you did say yes. Because, let’s be real. If my soulmate finally realised they’re being a piece of shit, I would snap at them and forgive them when I’m ready,” Renjun chuckled, continuing on munching down his salad. “We’ll always be here to back you up, even if it doesn’t seem like it,” Hyunjin nodded in agreement. 
“Thanks guys, I really appreciate it,” you sighed, mustering up the strength to give them a genuine smile. But alas, the empty feeling in your chest didn’t disappear. Not even a bit. But it made you feel a bit at ease knowing you have someone to turn to whenever you need it. 
You missed him. It wasn’t a secret among you and your friends. You missed Jaemin even if you didn’t want to. You missed the happiness bubbling up inside of you whenever he comes into your line of vision, you missed the butterflies swarming in your stomach whenever you hear his voice. You missed how he would complain about how his tummy hurts when he accidentally drank milk at the most random of moments. 
You missed how despite how he found your affections and small antics extremely bothersome, he never failed to do the littlest things to show that he still cared about you. You couldn’t even count how many times you would fall asleep to the scent of his hoodie whenever he accidentally left it in your room. You couldn’t count how many times you wrote small love letters at the back of your notebook whenever he pops up in your head. 
You couldn’t count how many times you would crack a small smile whenever you caught a small glimpse of his. 
It hurts to think that you lost your chance of ever feeling the same happiness you did before. At least, not in real life considering you’ve been having too many dreams of Jaemin. You’d wake up all happy and hyper then in a minute your mood will spiral down like a toilet bowl when reality hits you smack on the face. Though, you knew very well that you should just move on considering college was just around the corner.
You didn’t want to think about this anymore. 
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“Hey y/n, you got a minute?” 
Your head shot up from your phone, eyes wide in surprise to see none other than Lee Jeno himself. “Jeno?” you leaned your head to the side a bit, wondering why he was standing right in front of you when he was supposed to be in practice right now with Jaemin and the others. “Shouldn’t you be at practice?” you asked, pulling the strap of your bag that was slipping off your shoulder. 
“Coach cancelled today to cool us all off before the game next week,” Jeno shrugged, stuffing his hands in his pockets with a small shrug. “Right, the game! Good luck with that, by the way,” you beamed, eyes wide in realization when you realized that the last game for the guys was next week before exams starts. “You’re not coming?” he asked, leaning his head to the side in confusion. 
You wanted to. You really really do. You always had a front row seat so you can see Jaemin play at a close view. You remembered how you always cheered enthusiastically for him, Jeno and Hyuck back then, handing them cool water bottles afterwards. Putting up a bright smile as you watched Jaemin stare back at you with annoyance, his eyes showing how much he didn’t want you there. You remembered pretending to be oblivious to the sympathetic looks Jeno and Hyuck would always share whenever you attempted to make small talk with him. 
“Oh nope, I’m not. I’ll probably be napping or studying since finals are only a month away,” you lied, shaking your head with a small soft smile. You, knowing yourself, you’re probably going to watch one of your friend’s lives during the game and cheer in your room so you don’t have to see Jaemin in real life after the argument that went down last weekend. 
“You know you don’t need to lie right? I can’t count how many times you complain about how you studied a day before your exams,” Jeno chuckled, rolling his eyes as he nudged your shoulder with his teasingly. “Shut up, I spend most of my time doing last minute homework. I need breaks too sometimes, you know,” you scoffed, pushing on his arm with a dramatic huff. 
“Look at the bright side, no matter how little you study, you magically ace it without effort,” Jeno joked as you walked towards the vending machine in front of your school lobby. “There’s this thing called praying. Or satanic rituals a day before the exams,” you snickered, pulling your wallet out as you examined the food displayed through the transparent glass. 
“You want anything? I’ll pay,” you asked, turning to your taller friend with a soft smile, who shook his head ‘no’ at you. You shrugged as if to say ‘your loss’ before taking out a small bill and pushing it through the tiny slot. “So, what did you want to talk about, Lee Jeno?” you asked with a rather teasing tone. “You never talk to me in private unless there’s something you want,” you commented with a small snicker, pressing on the small button on the side of the machine. 
“Well, I hope you don’t mind me talking about this. It’s about Jaemin?” Jeno asked in a rather hesitant tone, sucking in his bottom lip nervously. 
You both heard the can drop into the opening slot at the bottom of the machine with a loud ‘clank!’ When he finished your sentence, you swore it sounded way too similar to how your heart dropped into your stomach at the mention of the brown boy. “Oh,” you replied almost inaudibly, kneeling down to grab your drink out of the slot. 
‘Say no. Are you seriously going to talk about the guy you just rejected after 2 years of pining for him to his best friend?’
You gulped silently, grabbing your drink as you took a deep breath to compose yourself. You stood up and gave him a weak smile, “what about him?” you asked, wincing internally at how weak your voice became at the thought of talking about the boy you were so whipped about. “You know you don’t have to if you don’t want to,” Jeno must’ve noticed how uncomfortable you felt when he brought him up as he cleared his throat. 
“No, no. It’s fine, I’m okay. I’m okay with talking about him. It’s just Jaemin,” you shrugged, trying to appear as nonchalant as you possibly could. “You sure?”Jeno asked, furrowing his brows as he stuck his hands in his pockets nervously. “It’s really okay if you don’t want to talk about it,” Jeno gave you a kind smile, one that almost made you take back what you said, however your pride got the best of you.
“It’s fine, really,” you nodded, giving him a reassuring smile as you internally yelled at yourself for not being honest to your dear friend. 
“I don’t want to invade on your personal issues with Jaemin or anything, but-” Jeno paused, furrowing his brows as he attempted to think of a nicer way to express his statement. “It’s pretty obvious that the two of you are in a rough patch and I don’t know if you noticed but Jaemin is pretty stressed out about this,” he grimaced as he realised that his words were leading to literally nowhere. 
“I’m sure you’re pretty stressed out as well, it’s pretty evident considering the tension between the two of you is way more than obvious and-”
“Jeno, where are you going with this?” your tone turned emotionless as you let out a heavy sigh, looking down at your shoes before looking up at your friend with eyes void of emotion, rubbing them with the palm of your hand. “I’m sure whatever you want to say is important but if you can’t tell I just want to go home and sleep until I have to get up,” you explained with a small smile. 
Jeno’s eyes widened a bit, surprised at how your bright demeanor vanished in a few minutes without leaving a single trace. ‘So Mrs. Dong was right about soulmates unrequited love being emotionally and mentally draining, then.’ Jeno thought to himself as he sucked his lips in to think of a way to express his thoughts without causing you to run off. 
‘Fuck it.’
“I know you probably don’t trust him anymore or you’re probably afraid of getting hurt after everything he’s done. But if- As if to say that Jaemin were to try woo-ing you over one more time, without fucking up that is, would you give him another chance?” he asked, his tone turning serious as his eyes hardened and stared into yours as if to spot any trace of you lying. 
‘Oh, so this is what this is about.’ you thought. 
“Did Jaemin put you up to this?” you asked, rubbing your palm against your temple as you felt the emptiness in your chest being replaced by non-other than the dull ache that is heartache. “Did he not get the message to leave our relationship, whatever’s left of it anyway, alone before it gets worse?” you sighed, chuckling slightly at the thought of Jaemin’s stubborn ass asking Jeno for a favor. Grimacing at how mean you sounded.
“No- no! Not at all, I asked you on my own accords. Jaemin has nothing to do with me asking you this-hell! He doesn’t even know that I’m here talking to you right now, trust me,” Jeno exclaimed, raising his hand up and using the other to cross his heart, symbolizing that he promised you that he was telling you the truth. You smiled a bit at this. 
“Why are you the one asking? Not to be rude, Jeno, but this doesn’t concern you,” you raised your brow, taking a step back as you twisted your drink open with curiosity. “I know, it’s none of my concern but honestly watching the two of you go on trying to solve this by yourselves is like watching the Twilight series except there’s no weird fantasy creatures and a werewolf falling in love with an infant child,” Jeno blurted out, scratching the back of his head, chuckling at his own little joke. 
“Oh,” you replied, letting out a small chuckle at his joke before your smile faltered. “Well what do you suggest I do? So far I’ve only been receiving advice from people that have heard only my side of the story. Considering you’ve heard Jaemin’s side of the story, what do you actually suggest I do?” you asked, stuffing your thumb in your pocket as you sipped your drink, lowering your gaze to your shoes nervously. 
“I suggest you follow my advice earlier. If Jaemin ever decides to try again and not fuck it up, I would advise you to consider giving him a chance,” Jeno shrugged. “I’m not saying that all the things he did were okay. Hell no, if I were you I would totally kick his ass for taking your kindness and affection for granted, I assure you. But Jaemin has been... trying really hard,” Jeno explained, sadness flashing against his eyes. 
“Trying hard?” you asked in a whispered tone, looking up at your friend with slight confusion. “Yeah!” he replied with a small bright smile. “You may not know this but Jaemin spends his time now wondering about what small cheesy things he could do to make you smile. Ever since you ghosted him, he’s been thinking about you alot. It was almost annoying.” he giggled, remembering the countless times Jaemin’s face would flush red whenever he realised he was thinking about you back when he was still in denial. 
“You may not notice it considering he always does this whenever you aren’t around. Despite the fact that Jaemin was always an asshole to you, he’s always think of you twenty four seven. It’s always ‘y/n would’ve liked this’, ‘this is something y/n would hate’, ‘y/n would’ve done this’, y/n this and y/n that. The idiot was whipped as hell but his stubborn ass didn’t realise how much he actually cares for you until now.” 
“Remember how you would leave him small letters in his locker or give it to him straight up before running off because you forgot to do your homework and you needed to do it before the bell rings? I swear, he always had this lovesick smile on his face when he watched you sprinting down the hall yelling at people to get out of the way,” Jeno chuckled, recalling the moments when he and Hyuck would spot Jaemin smiling to himself in front of his locker as he read the letters you send him every time you passed his locker. 
“That’s not- I don’t believe that,” you shook your head, not believing your ears. This couldn’t be the Jaemin you knew. You remembered vividly of how his eyes held no love whatsoever whenever you came into his line of vision, the way the happiness evaporated from his pupils the moment he turned his head at your figure. The angry glares he would give you whenever you do something small yet cheesy.
“Don’t you remember? When I gave one of my letters to him in person, he threw it away without a second thought. You saw it with your own eyes, Jeno. You can’t lie like that to me, that hurts, dude,” you frowned, clenching your fists as you recalled how he gave you the sweetest smile he could muster when you gave your small letter to him at one moment. And the next moment, you saw him crumpling it up in his hands and throwing it to the nearest trash can at the corner of your eyes. 
“Well, that was kind of our fault,” Jeno frowned, scratching the back of his neck nervously. “We swear, we didn’t know he would act like that in front of you. I swear he would have those wide smiles whenever he read your letters and occasionally Hyuck and I would tease the hell out of him. Usually he would just shove the letters back in his locker or something, we didn’t expect him to throw it out in front of you,” Jeno looked down, his expression filled with guilt as he gripped the saddle of his bag. 
“If we hadn’t teased him like that in front of you, maybe he wouldn’t have done that,” he mumbled under his breath. You stared at him in disbelief, it was like you were hearing about a completely different version of Jaemin. Yet you couldn’t be sure if Jeno was telling the truth. Jeno wasn’t one to tell lies, he was always the mature one in complicated situations. But you knew sometimes he would lie for the best. 
“I’m sorry, I find it very hard to believe you right now,” you bit your lip nervously, a dull ache appearing in your heart as you realised how sad you sounded. ‘Why is it so hard to believe that Jaemin would do something that nice? Why can’t I believe it? Jeno can’t be lying, right?’ you thought to yourself, feeling your heart sink at the fact that you couldn’t bring yourself to the fact that Jaemin could actually harbor feelings for you deep down even though he doesn’t realise it. 
“Hyuck took this picture a couple of months ago, that was before you stopped giving him letters, I think,” Jeno clicked his tongue, pulling out his phone and unlocking it before opening his chats with Donghyuck, scrolling up until he found the picture he sent before handing his phone to you. You furrowed your brows, holding his phone in your hand as you read their messages closely. 
It was indeed two months ago. Donghyuck had sent Jeno a picture of Jaemin’s locker. You zoomed in on the picture, spotting a stack of letters made from the pages of your notebook with dates on them at the corner of his messy locker. You could see a few were slightly crumpled as if the textbooks had something to do with it, but you could recognize that posca yellow marker anywhere. 
Your eyes widened slightly as you felt your heartbeat pick up its pace inside of your chest. “That’s pretty nice of him,” you mumbled, you didn’t have the strength to keep up your emotionless facade as you couldn’t help but crack up a small smile. Handing Jeno back his phone, you gave him a tight-lipped smile, leaning your head to the side in curiosity. “Why are you trying so hard to convince me to give him a chance, exactly?” you asked, letting out a small puff of breath. 
Jeno shrugged, giving you the same tight lipped smile as he shoved his phone in his pockets. “As I said before, I’m tired of watching this whole story slowly leading to an end where the two of you end up being miserable simps for the rest of your lives,” he joked, scratching the back of his head as he gave you one of his iconic eye smiles. You let out a small sad chuckle, looking down at your shoes in thought for a small moment before looking back up at your friend. 
“I’ll think about it. How about that?” you nodded sadly, you weren’t lying. You really did need time to think about all this. “Of course, I guess I’ll see you later?” Jeno nodded, sucking in his bottom lip as you waved him goodbye. “I’ll see you around, yeah,” you gave him a polite smile before walking away from the taller boy to the bus stop. Completely oblivious to the fact that Jeno had kept his fingers crossed behind his back while biting his lip, wishing desperately for Jaemin to not screw things up this time.
‘Well that’s definitely uncalled for,’ you thought as you fished your phone out of your bag to check the time. You didn’t know what to feel, you didn’t know what to think of this situation. You were confused to say the least.  If the y/n from two years ago was listening to this conversation right now, you know for a fact that she’d either be over the moon or she wouldn’t believe her own ears. But at this moment, you didn’t know what to think of this. 
Maybe, just maybe, if Jeno had told you this ages ago, maybe you would’ve still kept on going. Though, if he had told you this ages ago, would you still be willing to keep up your bright demeanor just so that Jaemin can step on you a lot longer? If you still kept going back then, if you just pretended that the fight between you and Jaemin didn’t happen like you always do, would things turn out differently? Would Jaemin agree to give you a chance? 
You didn’t know. Frankly you don’t want to. It’s best that some things are just left the way they are. 
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“Honey, Jaemin’s outside of the door. He said he wants to talk to you,” your mom called you out from the front door. Your jaw dropped as you quickly placed the spoon back into your plate of your mom’s famous pasta, abruptly getting up from the couch and placing your plate on the coffee table before dusting any weird crumbs off of your clothes. 
Clearing your throat, you yelled out a quick ‘be right there!’ as you made sure to tidy yourself up to ensure that you look presentable enough to look humane and not like a body that just got pulled out of the river. Your heartbeat increased with every step you take towards the front door, your clammy hands tightened into balls of fists as your anxiety crept up inside of you. 
‘Jaemin? Why is he here? He hasn’t spoken to you ever since the fight you two had at the library. More importantly, does his parents know about said argument? The Na’s aren’t ones who would shove their noses up into other people’s business but oh dear god, what if Jaemin told his parents and his parents told yours? 
Safe to say you had a really terrible feeling about this. 
Feeling your heart ache at the memory of your argument, you felt your heart growing empty and cold. Shaking the thoughts out of your head, you took a deep breath before poking your head into the room where your mom was smiling up at a seemingly exhausted Na Jaemin. You grimaced at his appearance, feeling your heart ache even more by how much of a mess he looked right at that moment. 
His hair was messy and disheveled, as if he had been tossing and turning in his for hours. There were heavy dark bags under his eyes, signifying his recent lack of sleep. He was in his casual attire: his iconic black nike’s sweatpants and a plain baggy white shirt and some random slippers that were probably a hand-me-down from his dad. 
Nonetheless, he looked really cozy. His appearance never failed to make your heart flutter in your chest, the small smile on his lips doing things to your stomach. You couldn’t help but dart your eyes down to the small (assumingly recycled) paper bag from Starbucks in his hand, furrowing your brows at this you attempted to walk towards them as casually as you can. 
“Mom?” you gulped, walking up towards her as you gripped your fists tightly behind you to hide your nerves. “Y/n, sweetie, look! Jaemin came to pay you a visit,” your mom exclaimed, smiling widely. It’s obvious that she’s using this opportunity to make the two of you finally talk face to face, clearly as she didn’t know anything that had happened after the dinner party your families had a couple months ago. 
Jaemin gave you an awkward smile, raising his free hand to give you a small wave, in which you returned with a small awkward wave of your own. “I’ll leave the two of you to catch up,” your mother nudged your arm and gave Jaemin a kind smile before walking back to the kitchen to give you two some privacy. Sucking in your bottom lip nervously, you watched your mom walk around the corner before looking back at the boy standing before you. 
“Hey,” he greeted in an attempt to make small talk. 
“Hi,” you responded breathily, putting your hands behind your back so he wouldn’t see you clenching your fists nervously. 
“I-Can we talk? Outside?” Jaemin spoke softly, biting his bottom lip nervously, nodding towards your front porch. Oh how those three words brought you so many unpleasant memories. Is this the same anxiety people in relationships feel? The two of you aren’t even together and you’ve gotten into so many fights in the past two years, it’s almost ironic. 
Before you could open your mouth to say something, Jaemin had already beat you to it. “I know you probably don’t want to, but I swear it won’t take much more than at least two minutes. But if you don’t want to it’s-” Jaemin spluttered out, stumbling over his own words as he looked down at his shoes to calm himself down. “Okay,” you agreed in a soft tone, nodding slightly at the older boy. 
“Are you sure?” Jaemin asked, looking up at you in slight surprise, relief evidently surging through his veins as you gave him a reassuring nod. He really did thought that you’d say no to him after your fight last weekend. “Yeah, it’s fine. Let’s talk outside,” you nodded, opening the front door, gesturing for him to walk out first. 
Kissing his teeth, Jaemin walked out of the door, watching you follow him and close the door behind you quietly before leaning your back against it. “I see you got a car?” Jaemin asked all of a sudden. Your gaze shot up from your feet to the brown headed boy in surprise, letting out a small ‘huh?’ in response, only to see that Jaemin was looking at your new white car. “Oh, yeah. I got my driver’s license recently and my aunt gifted me one to celebrate,” you nodded.
“Oh, that’s nice,” Jaemin nodded, sucking his lips in nervously. There was a pregnant pause between the two of you as your thoughts jumbled up to think about what to say next.  
“I’m sorry.” 
Your eyes went wide at him, your breathing hitched as Jaemin looked down with eyes filled with guilt and sorrow. “What?” you blurted out, confused at his sudden apology. “Look, I know you probably don’t want to see me right now and I know you told me you don’t want to see me anymore. But I can’t help it but try at least one more time. I promise I won’t waste your time anymore than I already have,” Jaemin ran a hand through his hair in distress, taking a deep breath before looking back up at you with eyes filled with regret and guilt, taking you aback by his sudden bold statement. 
“I’m sorry. About everything. The fight at the library, the dinner party with our parents, the music box, the gifts, everything I’ve ever done to hurt you. You didn’t deserve to be treated like shit by someone like me. You didn’t deserve to go through the mean bullshit I put you through the past two years, and you don’t have to forgive me for it. Because frankly, if I were you I won’t even bother forgiving myself either,” Jaemin started, letting all of his words pour out of his mouth from the heart. 
“I’m sorry for constantly embarrassing you in front of our friends and families whenever you show the slightest bit of affection towards me. I’m so sorry for throwing your gifts away right in front of you whenever our friends tease us a bit too much, that was a dick move of me and you didn’t deserve to have your efforts thrown into literal waste,” he grimace at the mention of throwing your heartfelt letters in the trash right in front of your eyes in front of his friends almost a year ago. 
He tightened his grip on the strings of the paper bag, biting this lip nervously  before continuing with his apology. “I swear I’m not making up any excuses for myself. I really do feel terrible for everything I did, I didn’t realize that I was hurting your feelings this bad for two whole years. You just wanted your soulmate to like you back, I should’ve at least tried to try,” he felt his heart getting even more heavier with every second that passed. 
“You really don’t have to forgive me and here’s something to make up for all the gifts I broke or threw away,” Jaemin outstretched his arm to hand you the paper bag, looking straight into your eyes with a small sad smile as you wordlessly grab the bag from him. “I-I don’t want to pressure you or anything but I would really like it if you come to the game next week, your usual spot feels empty without you there,” he chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck. 
“I promise I’ll leave you alone for real if you really want me to. I know I probably don’t deserve it, but if you’re willing to give me a second chance, I would take it in a heartbeat and I would be willing to make everything up to you. You don’t have to go and you don’t have to decide right now. I just came to give you that- God, why am I so awkward,” he buried his red face in his hands for a brief moment before looking up at you with a flustered expression. 
You couldn’t help but let out a small chuckle at his embarrassed state. ‘So this is what it feels like when you’re not the one embarrassing your ass off to give a gift to your crush, huh?’ you thought to yourself with a small smile. ‘How ironic,’ you sucked in your lips slightly before looking back at Jaemin with a genuine expression. “I’ll see you later,” Jaemin waved, turning quickly as to not fuck things up anymore than he already has. 
You gave him a small wave, turning around and entering your house to walk back to your couch and finish your pasta, placing the paper bag on the coffee table as you took a large bite of your pasta and pulled the tape that sealed the bag shut. As you were thinking everything over as you mindlessly chewed on your food, you pulled the bag and leaned it over towards you to examine its contents. 
Inside were a couple bars of your favorite chocolate bar, a note folded in half, a big packet of honey flavored chips, a small gift wrapped in notebook paper tied with a red string and a small decorative box with Jaemin’s name attached to it. You bit your lip, pulling out the note first and unfolding it as you pulled out the small wrapped gift, reading it as you unpackaged whatever Jaemin had gifted you. 
‘Hey Y/n. I don’t know if you’re going to be reading this or not. But if you do, I just want to say hi just in case you didn’t want to talk face to face I would at least ask your mom to give you this so the letter could convey my apologies way better than I actually would in real life.’
You pulled the red string off slowly, placing it carefully on the table as you slowly peeled the paper away to reveal a small familiar porcelain figure that was no bigger than the size of your palm. Your eyebrows raised in surprise at this, this porcelain figure was the same figure that came along with the music box your grandmother gave you before she passed away. You turned it around to inspect it even more, spotting the same crack on the edge to conclude that it was indeed the porcelain from your old music box. 
‘I know you might be wondering how the small doll was still intact considering I broke the whole music box to the point it was unrepairable, but trust me, I was hella surprised to see that this little thing was still intact. Maybe my carpet floor had softened the impact? I don’t know it was still very pretty and I wanted to give you back something that was previously yours. I know, you gave it to me but I really want you to have a piece of your grandma left with you, so don’t fight with me on this one, y/n >:(’
You couldn’t help but grin at the small smiley face he drew on the edge of the paragraph, letting out a small giggle as you placed the porcelain doll gently on the table beside your plate, taking a spoonful of your food before digging your hand back in the paper bag to fish out the decorated box. It was quite heavy considering you had to use two hands to pull it out. 
With a small huff, you place the box on the couch beside you. Crossing your legs over the other and placing the letter on your lap, you pulled the lid off of the box and placed it beside the paper bag before looking back inside the box, shock coursing through your veins. You felt your heart warm up at the contents of the box, feeling your stomach do somersaults in your body as you slowly picked up the contents one by one. 
The box was filled with nothing but your childhood polaroids the two of you took throughout your whole youth, some aesthetic pictures Jaemin took of you without your knowledge or consent during your freshman and sophomore year of middle school and high school (hell you didn’t even know he still took pictures of you). There were a few polaroids decorated with small doodles and hearts with sharpie markers. You spotted a few old post-it notes you had used to give Jaemin cheesy pick up lines, but this time they had small responses. 
‘Hey Jaemin, are you a camera? Because every time I look at you I smile. :D’
‘Hey Y/n. You better check the mirror, you’re the reason why I’m smiling right now :D’
‘If I had a genie that could grant me three wish, I would use them all just so you can be with me’
‘Well I’m here now, what are you going to do with the other two wishes?’
‘Your hand looks heavy, let me hold it for you, Jaemin :D’
‘My heart feels heavy, can you hold it for me?’
Your grin grew inevitably wider with every pick up line he wrote, heart fluttering as your stomach swarmed with butterflies. Rubbing your face to keep yourself from combusting as you dug your hand through the box to see the old letters Jeno had been talking about. You opened one of the dirty letters which was covered in small stickers and doodles. (which you assume was Jaemin’s doing, considering he has a clear eye for aesthetics)
‘I knew you liked really cheesy romance stuff and considering I watch a lot of k-dramas and shows in my free time, you know very much I’m going to put my romantic expertise into good use. It felt nice being the one giving gifts, no wonder you like giving me stuff so much, this is actually fun. I hope this isn’t too much for you. I know this probably isn’t going to make up for all the damage I’ve done in the past two years but at least I tried my best.’ 
You liked to write the dates on your letters just in case things like this happen and you would have the opportunity to look back and cringe at your own cheesiness and mediocre writing. You honestly couldn’t believe your eyes or Jeno when he said Jaemin had kept your letters in his messy void of a locker. But now that you had a living proof that he actually cherished your letters. You couldn’t help but feel some sort of comforting hope in your chest.
Your heart no longer felt empty or void of emotions, it felt full again. Though, not completely filled, it was better than feeling complete nothingness. You were still very much scared of trusting Jaemin with your own heart again, you were still very much scared of getting hurt again. But there was something inside you that was begging you to trust Jaemin again and let him back in your life. It has been telling you to do so ever since you saw how genuine he was being. 
‘I probably didn’t tell you this when we were talking but believe it or not, I actually really really like you. And I really want to try where this all can lead to, and if you’re willing to trust me again I would try my best not to fuck it up this time. I don’t expect you to say yes or anything to me. If you decide not to come to the game, I totally understand and I’ll leave you alone just like you asked. I missed hanging out with you, Y/n. I missed my best friend. I miss having my soulmate around, and I’m sorry that it took me this long to realise how important you truly are to me’
He really isn’t giving up is he? Well, if he hasn’t given you up like you did with him. Are you willing to repeat his previous actions and stop listening to your head and start listening to your heart again? Are you willing to give him up again? 
I’m sure you know the answer to that already.
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I feel like the end is quite rushed. i’m so sorry if so. I’ve been working on this for two weeks lmfao and it’s currently two am right now so Imma go to bed hehe. This series has like... what three chapters left? DAMN ITS BEEN A WHOLE YEAR SINCE I MADE THIS SERIES. DW I HAVE A HYUCK SERIES COMING UP SOONER OR LATER LMFAO.
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moonbeamsung · 3 months ago
Sink or Swim
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You plunged deep into an ocean of love for Huang Renjun, the boy who had already fallen for the sea itself.
member: renjun
au: sailor!renjun x gn!reader
word count: 2.7k
genre: angst, fluff, slightly dystopian
warnings: character death/drowning, mentions of water (one passing mention of a typhoon and a very heavy focus on the ocean), light profanity
recommended song: when i was older by billie eilish
author’s note: Not only did the lyrics to the above song inspire this fic, but so did the general mood and sound of it :) I would recommend listening while you read, since I think it really adds to the atmosphere. My creativity took quite a while to cooperate on this one but I like how it turned out and hope you do as well, feedback is highly appreciated as always. Thanks to @astroboy-lele for her help beta-reading this (like 2 hours ago), and enjoy!
taglist: @astroboy-lele @kyuwoyo @rvse-hvvck @nakamotocore @kisshim @hunjins​
network tags: @kpopscape @neo-constellations @culture-cafe @dreamlab-nct @k-dinernet 
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The sleepy little fishing village you call home seems to sigh with the tides, waves lapping at the shore in a rhythm not unlike that of steady breaths. It’s the world’s way of inhaling the salty air, sometimes laced with the pungent scent of a fresh catch.
The sport itself is a life force here, the key to any sort of contact with the rest of civilization. Without it, the hill that the small town is nestled into might just swallow up the dozens of small brick buildings, reducing them to nothing but a memory. The murky waters would carry minuscule traces of its existence far and wide, but not even a name could break the surface.
Unfortunately, the village’s dependence on exporting fish leaves little room for the personal aspirations of its residents. At some point in your life, you’ll be called to assist with a certain aspect of the product’s distribution. The elders in charge find ways for even the most unskilled of hand and mind to participate, but they always save the hardest work for those who were born into it: the sailing families.
Quite literally, a love of the sea is in Huang Renjun’s blood.
His great-grandfather was around to see the beginnings of the seaside community, and he became the most famous fisherman known to the village by returning to the docks with large nets in tow, just bursting with sharp fins and thrashing tails. Those were the glory days, and generations later, the Huangs want their young son to follow in his footsteps, to become just as well-known for legendary angling expeditions.
But... he’s not really interested.
He would much rather take to the waves in a boat and chase the horizon, not bothering with casting a net or even a rod. To him, the ocean air is beyond suffocating, like a poison meant to expel any wanderlust from his lungs, to rip it from his soul. Renjun is a fiery spirit, and not even the crashing, slate-colored waters can dampen the adventurous spark burning bright and warm inside of him. It would take more than a typhoon to do so.
You admire that about him, too. How he holds a strong but steady resistance to the traditions of the village, the limited and meager expanse of the world that you’ve both lived in—no, been confined to—all your life.
Just think of the endless possibilities that await, beyond the hazy fog obscuring the fine line between land and sea. The faint shapes that loom in the distance, perhaps a trick of the eye but perhaps another sign of life besides you, seem so close but are still just out of your reach, teasing you both with what could lie outside this languid, ashen realm. Your heart races at the mere notion of such a thing.
The waves are impossibly blue when their image is reflected in Renjun’s dark eyes; you notice this one dreary afternoon as you let your feet dangle above the gentle ripples, sitting at the edge of one of the many docks that tangle through a mess of sailboats and fishing gear. The burnt orange of his threaded sweater stands out against the rest of the scenery, so monochromatic you sometimes swear the world is black and white.
He’s a splash of color, a splash of adventure and determination among a colorless mass of villagers who wouldn’t trade the way things are right now for anything. The dull, scuffed toes of his boots drag along the wooden planks as he trudges towards you, settling down at your side with a small gust of wind. Both anticipating and dreading the impending day when his father would teach him how to take to the seas and steer the boat that’s run in his family for generations, Renjun finds himself at the humble and rickety marina often. Anticipating because that knowledge would enable him to change the course of his own life on his own terms, and dreading because he knew of the harsh disapproval those actions would receive.
But still, Renjun stays right there on the dock next to you, diving past the shallows of his conscious mind and into the darkest, deepest abyss of his own thoughts, letting them bubble and sputter up and puff into the air like sea spray. If both your hearts are oceans of their own, they collide in this moment, as his ambitions and aspirations spill over into yours and settle on the seabed below. He’s chosen you to entrust these secrets with. You, the only other resident of the village with a familiar restlessness in your eyes when the sun disappears below the distant horizon, gaze wistful and longing to do the same.
And as if they’re the precious riches of a mythical swashbuckling pirate, you keep them there, each word a golden coin or sparkling gem hidden away in a long-lost treasure chest. The twilight sky that evening is the most vivid you’ve ever seen it, and daylight is fading fast by the time Renjun finishes telling you everything.
“I never knew there was someone who felt the same way I did about all this.”
The realization sets in late, just as the weathered surface you’re both perched on sways in the wind. You fear for a second that you might slip forward into the icy water; that’s how strong the breeze whipping through the air around you feels. That, or it’s due to the sheer force from your heart as it swells at finally meeting someone you’ve admired from afar for what feels like an eternity, ever since you understood what life was like and what it meant for you here.
Sure, Renjun’s grandfather may have been well-known in the past for one reason, but to you, Renjun is creating a legacy of his own for another, one of more than just adolescent rebellion and defiance. It’s one of undoubtable self-awareness, of an adamant refusal to conform to an existence he hadn’t chosen, and he’s finding a way to alter what he’s been seemingly destined for all his life.
“Me neither,” you shake your head, still in a small fraction of euphoric disbelief. “All that’s left to do now is stow away on a ship together in the dead of night, I suppose.” The comment is joking, but he takes it more seriously than you anticipated. The cloudy sky above brightens with his eyes.
You convene in shadowy alleys when no one’s looking, wasting away the hours as you mutually yearn for just a sliver of knowledge of the unknown, enthralled by the waves in the distance and what lies below and above and beside. Renjun sometimes whisks you away to a steep overlook that provides a panoramic view of the beach, the powdery sand so far beneath your bare feet gray enough to pass for finely packed pebbles. You find yourself melting into his embrace like the sea melts into the sky, blurring the already thin lines between air and water and between friendship and love. The way his fingers encircle your wrist with a curl like that of a cresting wave is telling enough on its own. His heart belongs to two bodies now.
You can’t help but notice all the similarities he bears to the element you’ve never lived a day of your life without seeing, without hearing the undulations of, without smelling or tasting the salty tang it brings to the air. Always moving, a force to be reckoned with, and evidently a possessor of the ability to travel far and wide on even the most fleeting of whims.
He’s utterly himself around the water, too. You’re almost positive he could effortlessly duck beneath the surface, take a breath, and his lungs would drink it in as if it was air. The only place he doesn’t feel like drowning is below the waves.
“Look!” Renjun points out an unfamiliar vessel tied down at the far end of the pier one day, sails torn in jagged lines as if they had been slashed by a larger-than-life creature. Upon closer examination, you find that the wooden bow of the sailboat is splintering and the windows into the cabin are shattered. The name carved into the hull is simply too faded for you to decipher the letters.
“This boat must’ve gone through hell and back,” you comment, your response delayed like an echo. “Who do you think it belongs to, anyway?”
He’s lost within a symphony of thoughts before he answers, “No one.”
Both incredulous and doubtful, you whip around to meet Renjun’s assured gaze. “No one ever comes and no one ever goes, it’s that simple. These same boats have been docked for years. They’ve belonged to the same families one decade after another.” The boy sighs, scanning the horizon for anything that might appear the slightest bit unusual. “The real question is where it came from.”
You have no answer for him.
“Regardless,” he speaks up again, quite matter of factly, “It’s ours now.”
“Yes, ours. You said you’d sail away with me, right?”
It certainly isn’t the aspiration you would have envisioned yourself pursuing. You could have chosen to quietly obey, to live and work exactly as you were told by a community so rigid that you felt frozen to the bone. Not like the pleasant chill of the ocean, rather a restrictive pair of icy shackles, ever-tightening around your limbs and subduing your mutinous thoughts. But here you are, longing for a little something more both in life and with the only person that understands your heart’s deepest desires like they’re his own. And at their core, they are.
Without fear, Renjun takes a confident stride onto the boat’s deck, turning back to you and offering his hand as you mimic the action. “What are you waiting for?” He asks, eyes twinkling.
A warm thrill courses through your veins, growing hotter with each small preparation you make towards your inevitable departure. It’s an affair of many weeks, but at last you’ve gathered all of the necessary supplies and courage to carry out your plan.
The day finally comes, the day you’ll spring into action and take hold of your futures by the ropes, no one but yourselves telling you how or where to steer.
On the most moonlit night you’ve ever been alive to witness, you and Renjun both slip out from underneath your fraying comforters, unbeknownst to the rest of your households. Save for your two restless souls, the entire village is sound asleep, the unceasing lullaby of the tides casting its steadfast spell on bodies and minds like clockwork. Wooden floors so hollow and dusty that they barely creak under your weight, you successfully glide out your respective front doors in silence like translucent spirits.
No one else in the village had even acknowledged the foreign ship’s presence, but this shouldn’t surprise you, not in the slightest. The thick, colorless fog of life had long since settled around the shoulders of anyone and everyone who allowed it to, ensnaring them in a mind-numbing, monotonous routine. It blocks out the sun and the rain, the light and the darkness. It’s all so sickeningly the same. Empty eyes can’t pay any mind to their surroundings. Meanwhile, yours are full of hope, the brightest in the land.
In the distance, Renjun appears as vibrant and sprightly as ever. His form cascades down a flight of stone steps, leading from the sheer hills clustered with homes onto sea-level ground, and glides over the small dunes of sand separating you. He reaches the edge of the beach and your side a minute later, the thump of his heart keeping time with the tides. A nod, and you’re sprinting towards the docks, fingers trembling in excited anticipation.
It isn’t until after you’ve clumsily set sail that you see the ominous shadows of dark clouds laid out ahead, directly in your path. Even in the dead of night, a flash of distant lightning illuminates the world in a harshly jagged blaze for as far as the eye can see, as it strikes some unknown location out in front of the sailboat.
You’re certain the repairs you’ve spent days and nights working on with Renjun will be enough to keep the ship intact, despite the weather you’re sure to endure if you continue on this route. So you press on, missing the apprehension furrowing his eyebrows.
But because every force of nature has decided to convene against you both for reasons eternally unknown, the harsh winds weave their way in between the threads your careful hands had stitched on the canvas, meant to catch the breeze but being torn apart by it instead. Suddenly you’re struggling to hold on to your balance and you feel as flimsy as a leaf in a blustering current of cold, crisp wind.
Perhaps you should have practiced first. Renjun had not yet received a single ounce of training from his experienced father, and it was far from wise to leave the only life you’ve ever known without any knowledge of how to get to your next one. He’s trying to hide his panic now, wavering between the steering controls and warily glancing up at the gloomy midnight sky. One more flash of lightning, and all goes awry, all at once.
The water around you surges, as if physically drawn to the heavens, and more falls from above. Raindrops pelt down onto your arms and soak your hair, drenching the sails and filling the shallow hull almost instantly. Wave after towering wave crashes down, hard, and you’re no longer certain which way is up. About to lose your footing, you feel a pair of arms wrap around your middle like the snug hold of a life preserver.
Before all vitality can be lost and smothered by the raging ocean, a desperate Renjun holds fast to you, your thin clothes clinging to the damp skin of his hands. The storm is just too much, and there’s no way you’ll see the journey through like you had hoped. It’s difficult, excruciating even, to accept, and even more difficult for Renjun to let go of you like this. He’ll fight until the end, fight the fates and the invisible forces that life entails to hold you for just a few more seconds.
He won’t be able to live with himself, even in whatever afterlife may or may not come after the darkness he already sees, feels closing in on him, if he doesn’t sacrifice his last breath for a final moment of bliss, of you.
The sensation of Renjun’s wan lips pressing into yours overwhelms and surpasses all others, his palms tracing the edges of your figure like the tides trace the sandy shore. Urgently he draws you close up against him, trying his best to shield you from the inescapable terror of the sea. A lifetime’s worth of energy and emotion and passion is expended, making up for all the time in the world he wouldn’t and couldn’t have. The tang of saltwater meets your tongue, and you’re not sure if it’s the taste of him or of the ocean.
A weak tug on your palpitating heart, an internal scream in your ringing ears tells you that you should resent him for this, for propelling you forward in your apparently unachievable fantasies of living the life you wanted for yourself. But you don’t, you can’t. It’s no one’s fault, really. With this thought, a peaceful stillness washes over you amidst the chaos, and your awareness of the boy in your embrace fades steadily, slowly, then rapidly. Reality is getting paler, more black and white than ever, and you’re sinking further and further down towards the ocean floor miles below. The faint light of the moon becomes distorted from underneath the water, blurring with your failing vision. It all slips away, and then there’s nothing.
It’s a shame no one in the village takes notice of the two extra stars that blink into existence on that moonlit night, but yours and Renjun’s souls take their place among the rest, both a warning and a calling to anyone who dared attempt what you did. Two guiding lights pointing any other dreamers towards the hope of a better, brighter future.
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armysantiny · 3 months ago
재민 (Jaemin)
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Pairing: Jaemin x female reader
Genre: fluff, timestamp
Includes: teacher au, crushes, calling reader Noona, coffee, one-sided love, 
Word count: 317
Warning: n/a
Rating: PG
Tagging: @kwritersworld​, @kdiarynet, @kpopscape, @ultkpopnetwork, @kpopficsnetwork, @k-dinernet, @lovesick-net, @neo-constellations, @dreamwritersnet, @neoswitchnet​
An; Love Fools~ God I’ve written for Nana so many times.
Working with children was rewarding, but working with y/n made each day so much better. At least, that was the case with Na Jaemin. Paired with her three out of five days a week when the school term started, Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Fridays had quickly become his favourite days to come into work, for obvious reasons. Watching her play with the kids whenever he could, his heart wouldn’t rest; beating heavily against his chest. There was no mistaking it, Na Jaemin had a crush, and he was crushing hard.
In the breakroom while the kids ate their lunch, y/n watched the winter’s snow from the window, a gentle smile on her face. The snow was so beautiful, yet so fragile. Brought out of her thoughts when Jaemin joined her at the table with a coffee - his famous ‘way too many shots of espresso than needed’ cup - y/n shook her head with an amused grin when she noticed the coffee.
“Again with the over-the-top espresso shots Mr Na?” Stopping when Jaemin pouted, she furrowed her brows in confusion. “What’s the matter? Stressed?”
“I thought agreed to be more informal Noona~ just call me by name.” Jaemin whined, reaching out and nudging y/n’s shoulder.  Nodding in realisation, y/n offered her brownie bar as an apology, ruffling the younger teacher’s hair. Taking the snack and grinning as y/n ran her fingers through his hair, Jaemin was content. An idea coming to mind, he stood up, taking y/n by the hand and leading her through to the teacher’s courtyard. 
Nothing was said for a while, the two teachers enjoying the other’s company. And Jaemin could stay like that forever; simply being around y/n was enough to make him happy. Of course he knew that it was risky for two colleagues to fall in love, but what was life without its risks? He’d be a fool for not trying, right?
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armysantiny · 3 months ago
Pretty - LTY
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Pairing: Taeyong x male reader
Genre: fluff, oneshot
Includes: college au, college au, third-year reader, third-year Taeyong, Taehyung mention, Johnny mention, Changkyun mention, injury, library, crushing, confession, strangers to lovers
Word count: 1.1k
Warning: reader falls from a ladder, head injury
Rating: 12
Tagging: @kwritersworld, @kdiarynet, @kpopscape, @kpopficsnetwork, @ultkpopnetwork @kpopcontentcreatorsclub, @k-dinernet​, @lovesick-net, @neo-constellations, @neoswitchnet​
Beta reader/s: @queen-of-himbos​ (ty!)
Summary: Who knew watching Taeyong every day would leave y/n with an infatuation that craved his attention? Maybe he was a fool to fall for the school’s resident pretty boy, but that was on y/n.
An: Love Fools~ And the collapse is lifted straight from Thai BL lol (2gether and 2moons2 to be specific). Okay a lot of this is lifted from Thai BL
Y/n didn’t watch Taeyong on purpose. At least, he didn’t the first time.
Typing away at his essay, y/n glanced at the notes on his desk every so often. There was something about studying in the library late at night that the third-year med student enjoyed. Everything felt still, and he could focus on his work - and the music he was listening to. Pausing his progress to search for a book he needed, his fingers brushed along the spines of the books absentmindedly, he snapped back to reality when he bumped into someone. 
“Oh, I’m sorry were you looking for a certain book?” Taeyong smiled, finding himself amused at y/n’s flustered apology. Shaking his head, he offered to help find the book y/n was looking for, which was gladly accepted. The faster y/n could find his book, the better. The pair looking for the textbook, y/n couldn’t help but watch Taeyong - the university’s ‘pretty boy’; peach pink hair, bright eyes and his iconic soft denim style. Shaking his head when he realised that he was staring, y/n focused on finding the book.
Finishing the essay a few hours later, y/n saved the document and gathered his things, ready to get some well-earned sleep. Heading out, the third-year student was joined by Taeyong, who had been humming something or other under his breath. He hadn’t already left? Y/n thought the popular boy had already gone back to his room, 
“Taeyong-ssi, I didn’t realise you were still here - are you heading to the dorms?” Turning to y/n, the male in question nodded, putting his headphones around his neck in exchange for ear warmers. Y/n was heading in the same direction, so naturally, it made sense to the par of them to walk there together. Little in the way of conversation being made, y/n arrived at his door first, waving a short goodbye to his companion before heading inside. However, he couldn’t help but watch as Taeyong walked away, something unidentifiable playing on his curiosity.
Second time’s no mistake, that’s for sure.
Sitting in the cafeteria with a book in hand, y/n’s focus was mainly undisturbed, until he heard Taeyong’s name called. Looking up, he recognised the voice as Johnny’s, but again, he found himself watching Taeyong. They were only a few tables apart, but the stars in Taeyong’s eyes were more than clear, and y/n had started getting lost in them. And of course, his friends found it amusing when the bookworm didn’t respond to a thing they were saying.
“Y/n! Are you listening?” Changkyun laughed, waving his hand in front of y/n’s eyes. Looking over confused, y/n raised an eyebrow when his table started to laugh amongst themselves, murmurs here and there.
“What, what were we talking about? I wasn’t paying attention.” Rubbing the back of his neck with a sheepish smile, y/n’s ears flashed a shade of pink. Sighing, Taehyung returned to what he was was talking about, which happened to be his latest art piece. Trying his hardest to listen to the topic of conversation - he really did try - y/n’s mind wouldn’t stop; Taeyong looked perfect, and his smile was imprinted in y/n’s imagination. What if he could make him smile like that?
No, that wouldn’t happen, would it?
Third time’s a charm, isn’t it?
By this point, y/n was certain that he had something for the pretty boy he watched everyday. There had to be a reason why his heart wouldn’t rest whenever Taeyong came to mind, right? He would confess, but the timing had to be right, and it wasn’t the right time yet. Not when helping his seniors’ hang up banners and he had to keep steady on the ladder. And just as it happened, y/n was distracted for a second too long, his head hitting the ground hard only moments later. Vision blurry, the last thing y/n saw before he passed out was Taeyong calling for help, and his seniors making sure he wasn’t bleeding out.
Waking up in the infirmary with the sun still high that afternoon, y/n got up with a groan. His head was throbbing and the glare of the sun hitting his face hurt his eyes. Rushing to close the curtains, Taeyong walked over to the injured male and helped him sit up, taking a seat on the edge of the bed.
“Y/n, are you okay? You hit your head pretty-”
“I have feelings for you.” Blurting out his confession, y/n wished - by some miracle - that he could reverse time. Embarrassed and very much humiliated by what he thought was a rejection, y/n looked down, his hands suddenly more interesting than talking to Lee Taeyong. Clenching his fists as he waited to hear a response, the lovestruck third-year raised his eyebrow when his crush slowly opened his hands, a simple hum filling the silence.
“You’ll hurt yourself if you keep doing that, you know?” Saying nothing about whether he had accepted or rejected y/n’s feelings, Taeyong went about getting y/n some painkillers and water. Judging by how hard he fell, he’d be out of class for a while.
His, but I didn’t know.
Y/n and Taeyong had started spending more and more time together - and as a result so had their friendship groups - but y/n had yet to get a response to his flash confession. And it had been a week already. Chatting amongst themselves, they stopped when a group of what looked like first years approaching their table. One of the girls stepping forward with some encouragement from her friends, she blushed heavily, taking a breath before she spoke.
“Y/n sunbae, I like you. Could I have your-” Stepping up and taking y/n’s hand with a glare directed at the first year, Taeyong spoke up,
“I’m sorry, but he’s already taken,” everyone - y/n included - watching Taeyong with wide eyes, he continued, “he’s my boyfriend.”
“What?” Y/n blinked, confused and hurriedly apologising as Taeyong pulled him aside and away from everyone else. Watching him, y/n’s mind was racing a mile a minute. Did Taeyong just say what he thought he just said. He was his boyfriend? When they had finally stopped walking, y/n let go of Taeyong’s - or apparently, his boyfriend’s - hand, in need of some answers.
“Taeyong, what was that just now? Your boyfriend?” Y/n asked, waiting on a response. He needed to make sense of what just happened.
“I should have told you earlier huh? I accepted your confession I just - didn’t know how to tell you without embarrassing you.” Taeyong admitted, looking the other way before looking back. “Well?”
“This means we’re together, right..?”
“Yep, that sounds about right.” A smile forming on y/n’s face, he felt that familiar butterflies-in-your-stomach, but he could put it to the side, at least. Gently reaching for a hug, y/n rest his head on Taeyong’s shoulder, his mind at ease.
Maybe falling in love wasn’t so foolish after all.
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armysantiny · 3 months ago
샤오줜 (Xiaojun)
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Pairing: Dejun (Xiaojun) x gender neutral reader
Genre: angst, timestamp
Includes: ex boyfriend Dejun, boyfriend Mark, regrets, coffee, breaking up, reuniting
Word count: 663
Warning: n/a
Rating: PG
Tagging: @kwritersworld, @kdiarynet, @kpopscape, @ultkpopnetwork, @kpopficsnetwork, @k-dinernet​, @lovesick-net​, @neo-constellations​, @neoswitchnet​.​
An: Love Fools~
Loving y/n was the best thing that could have happened to Xiaojun, and he was a fool for taking it for granted. It hurt him to watch them with Mark, laughing about who knows what while Dejun sat there wondering just how he’d try to move on. What if he couldn’t? What if he couldn’t move on, now that he had started loving y/n the way he should have? Wallowing in his own self-pity as he stared at a photo frame of him and y/n, the model tried to drown out his own thoughts by heading out.
Not that it helped; he found himself walking into y/n’s favourite cafe and took a seat at their favourite spot. Just by the window, overlooking the street ahead. He could practically hear the way they’d comment on everything moving past while they’d go out. Or more accurately, when Dejun would absentmindedly scroll through his phone and only replied with the nod of his head. Ordering his usual coffee, Dejun simply sighed; his heart really wasn’t going to forgive him for letting go of them the way he did.
Y/n had had enough. Did Dejun even want to put in any effort, or were they going to carry the relationship themselves? Letting go of Dejun’s hand while they sat in the park, they shoved their now ex’s hand off them as they looked away.
“Enough, Dejun. I’m tired of trying to excuse your behaviour. Did you even love me at all? Or was this some game to you?”
“It, it wasn’t! I promise y/n, please! Give me another chance, I’ll make it up to you, I swear!” Dejun asked - no - begged, his voice cracking as his eyes filled with tears. Oh how he’d been such an idiot.
“You’ve had too many chances, Dejun. Let’s stop now, okay?” Walking off afterwards, y/n took a deep breath and called their parents; they needed to be with family right now. A month away from everything would do some good, hopefully. As they walked away, Dejun stumbled back, his mind unable to process what he had heard. It really was over, wasn’t it?
Nothing felt the same anymore and Dejun hated it. He couldn’t seem to get rid of the weight in his heart, but what could he do? He had finished his coffee and was walking through the very park he had lost them in, but it was painfully ironic. The park was gorgeous, people walking past were happy and the sun was bright - the same couldn’t be said for the brunet with a distraught frown on his face. Watching the sky go past as he sat down on a bench, Dejun almost didn’t realise his phone had gone off, with a message from the one person on his mind.
y/n -> Dejun
Hey, I wanted to make sure you’re okay, I know it’s been a while. Coffee at our old usual?
He wasn’t dreaming - or at least he didn’t think he was. Gosh, y/n was an angel he didn’t deserve to have in his life. Unlocking his phone and smiling, Dejun appreciated the suggestion.
Dejun -> y/n
That sounds nice. Are you free this weekend?
What was he doing, what was he doing- y/n had a boyfriend, he shouldn’t be interfering with their relationship. He was y/n’s ex, but they still cared about him. Old habits die hard, Dejun knew that much. But perhaps - and this was a huge stretch - perhaps y/n wanted to be on friendlier terms. Wishful thinking, but that hope was all that was keeping Dejun from dropping into another rabbit hole of self-pity.
y/n -> Dejun
I’m free ^.^ thanks for answering, I thought you’d want to avoid me.
Some people never change. And sometimes it was for the better. Grinning as he put his phone away, Dejun finally had something to look forward to. And this time, he’d pay attention to y/n, instead of his phone.
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armysantiny · 3 months ago
쟈니 (Johnny)
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Pairing: Johnny x female reader
Genre: fluff, timestamp
Includes: non idol au, one-sided love, teddy bear, roommates, takeout, 
Word count: 325
Warning: n/a
Rating: PG
Tagging: @kwritersworld, @kdiarynet, @kpopscape, @ultkpopnetwork, @kpopficsnetwork, @k-dinernet, @lovesick-net, @neo-constellations, @neoswitchnet​
An: Love Fools~​
It was always the little things with Johnny. The cafe y/n and he had first met in, her favourite brand of ice cream or the way she’d let out the cutest ‘evil’ laugh when she had something planned. He’d fallen in love with his roommate, hard, and he liked it. Reading a book in his room when the door creaked open, Johnny looked up from his page to see y/n sat at the end of his bed, something hidden in her hands, humming a tune to herself. Setting the book to the side, Johnny scooted himself closer, trying to sneak a peek.
“Y/n-ah~ what are you hiding hmm~?” When y/n put the teddy bear in his lap with that ever-so-cute giggle, Johnny had to restrain himself from the thought of kissing that perfect smile. “A teddy bear? Why thank you y/n-ah~”
“You’re so extra oh my gosh-” Y/n laughed, covering her face. “You’re so freaking tall, you give good hugs, and you love wearing this sweater - I still don’t understand how it works - so...teddy bear!” She reasoned, hands out to further her point. Admiring the gift, Johnny pet it’s head and placed it on his nightstand, framing it between his fingers. Walking back to give y/n a hug, he rest his head on hers, a content smile on his face.
“Oh? So we’re hugging now? I take it you like it then~.” Y/n teased, returning the hug and letting herself bury her face in his chest. Warm. Staying like that for a while, y/n released herself from the hug and skipped her way to the kitchen, calling after him.
“I ordered food, come eat~!” Watching her leave his room, Johnny smiled to himself, looing to the teddy bear one more time. As much as he wanted to confess so badly, perhaps loving y/n from a distance wouldn’t be so bad. Oh who was he kidding?
A fool in love, that’s who Johnny Suh was.
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armysantiny · 3 months ago
도영 (Doyoung)
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Pairing: Doyoung x male reader
Genre: fluff, timestamp
Includes: college au, third-year Doyoung, first-year reader, one-sided love, iced coffee, feigning innocence
Word count: 347
Warning: n/a
Rating: PG
Tagging:@kwritersworld​, @kdiarynet​, @kpopscape​, @ultkpopnetwork​, @kpopficsnetwork​, @k-dinernet​, @lovesick-net​, @kpopcontentcreatorsclub​, @neo-constellations​, @neoswitchnet​
An: For the Love Fools event!
Iced coffee was y/n’s favourite drink. And Doyoung remembered.
He remembered when they first went out to get drinks for their study session and he watched the younger male’s eyes sparkle when he ordered his iced americano. The way y/n couldn’t stop smiling as the pair studied together - little happy dances every time he had some of his drink. And there Doyoung was, watching his younger friend with a beating heart.
A heart that was falling in love.
He had to admit it to himself; y/n made his heat beat like no one else and all words seemingly went out of the window when Doyoung was with him. And finding said person asleep on the table in the campus library, the third-year found himself grinning, covering his face as he laughed at y/n’s endearing innocence. How could someone look so precious, asleep?
Returning to the library with an iced latte and gently shaking the freshman awake, Doyoung laughed, taking a seat beside y/n as he rubbed his eyes. Confused as he looked to his hyung, he must have woken up when he heard that ever familiar sound of ice, because all traces of fatigue seemed to vanish almost immediately.
“Hyung! You got me iced coffee?”
“What else did I get you hmm?” Doyoung chuckled, ruffling y/n’s hair and handing the drink over, “why were you sleeping here anyway? Did you pull another late-nighter?” A guilty smile on y/n’s face, the freshman looked  around, feigning innocence.
“I pulled an all-nighter? Me?” Raising his hands in defense when Doyoung gave him a look, y/n giggled, “okay okay~ but I had to hyung! Honest!” Y/n defended, his bambi eyes pleading. Doyoung knew he couldn’t say no to that gaze.
“Fine fine y/n-ah, I believe you. You hungry? Wanna get something to eat? Hyung’s treat~.” Doyoung offered, his heart growing in size - if it was even possible as he watched y/n. When y/n did agree, Doyoung took the freshman’s hand and led him to a cafe, where they both ate together.
He’d tell y/n, it’d just have to wait.
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armysantiny · 3 months ago
Stars and Smiles - LJN
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Pairing: Jeno x female reader
Genre: fluff, oneshot
Includes: confessions, coffee, barista reader, server Jeno, non idol, desserts, friends to lovers, teasing, chocolates.
Word count: 865
Warning: n/a
Rating: PG
Tagging: @kwritersworld, @kdiarynet, @kpopscape, @ultkpopnetwork, @kpopficsnetwork, @k-dinernet, @lovesick-net, @neo-constellations, @dreamwritersnet, @neoswitchnet​
An: For @kpopscape​‘s Love Fools’ event!
Watching the night sky was y/n’s favourite past time. And watched Lee Jeno smile, was definitely a close second. Okay maybe not second, but it did rival stargazing as her top spot. And just who could blame her? She could count her lucky stars - pun intended - that she met the sweet-hearted part-time server who would soon become her favourite person.
Waiting outside the restaurant Jeno worked at with two coffees in hand, y/n took a sip of her own in the cold winter air, a scarf wrapped around her jacket. Counting the seconds that went by as her - boyfriend? Best friend? they didn’t really know - ‘person’ came to the end of his shift, the barista ended up humming a tune under her breath until he finally did exit those glass doors. Taking the coffee gratefully, Jeno smiled, wrapping an arm around y/n as they walked down the streets together, to their favourite night-time spot.
“Thanks for the coffee by the way, I was starting to fall asleep in there you know?” He quipped, ruffling her hair. Nodding in semi-belief, y/n continued to drink her coffee as they walked. It had been her off day, and she had occupied herself with finding a new notebook for her writing. And although she was indecisive, there was one thing it needed; stars.
“Tsk, tsk; were you going to sleep on the job Lee Jeno-ssi?” She teased, the brown in her eyes lit up by the street lights. To say that Jeno’s heart didn’t do several backflips when their eyes met, would be an utter lie. Speechless for a moment - although it felt like ages - the blue-haired server shook his head to bring himself back to reality before pouting, a smile in his eyes. Brushing past the tease, he took y/n’s hand in his own and pulled her inside a chocolates store.
“Chocolate? Now?” Looking around her, y/n found herself reminiscing her childhood; waiting patiently at the end of the day when she would go and buy chocolates with her grandma after school. It felt like home.
“Mhm~! There’s never a bad time for chocolate. Pick some, we can eat it by the tree tonight. Try and tell me that doesn’t sound good, come on.” Jeno hummed, watching y/n walk around the store, a clear longing in her eyes. And it was that same longing gaze that had caught his heart and left it craving her company. How he had met that darling barista by chance, he didn’t know, but he was sure that he was glad he did. Y/n gave him a reason to smile more every day. When she had picked out the chocolates they would eat later, Jeno stopped her from reaching for her wallet.
“You already paid for the coffee - this is my treat, okay?”
“Okay, okay, sunshine~”
Taking a seat by the tree they always sat at to stargaze, y/n set the bag of chocolates on the mat she’d brought, and let out a small ‘oh’ when she noticed Jeno pull out some wrapped cookies from his pocket. Handing one over, the pair sat there in relative quiet - par the odd passing comment about the night view - nibbling on their snacks and finishing the rest of their coffee. It was peaceful, and neither wanted it to change. It would almost have been even better if time had just stopped there and then.
“Yeah, y/n?” Turning to her, Jeno’s smile reflected the moonlight above and it was hard not to fall in love. How could she not? Her mind drawing a blank on just what she wanted to say, she cleared her throat, took a sip of her drink before getting her question out.
“What does this mean to you? Are we friends? A couple? I like what we have, but it feels like we’re somewhere in the middle, you know?” Y/n confessed, a weight seemingly off her chest. It was true; too many times it felt like they were a couple, and her heart wouldn’t stop beating. And judging by the way Jeno processed what he had just heard, it looked like the same thought had been running through his mind too.
“ does,” closing his eyes to try and escape how flustered he felt, he continued after he managed to calm down, “do you want to define this? Cause I’d really like if you were my girlfriend.”
“You do?”
“Yeah, I’ve wanted to tell you for a while now.” Jeno admitted, his hands fiddling with the straw of his drink. It wouldn’t be too much if he asked y/n out now, would it? Before he could finish his train of thought, y/n asked him first.
“Well, do you want to be my boyfriend?” Watching his reaction, y/n visibly relaxed when he nodded, attempting to hide his grin as y/n pulled him into a hug. Staying like that until they started getting warm, y/n let Jeno out of the hug and rest her head on his shoulder, lacing her hand with his.
There was something about stars and smiles, and as long as Jeno was there, y/n could watch the stars with a smile. 
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