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#new beginnings

I had some job interviews in the last two months, but Corona made it very difficult to get a new job asap. Last week I got a call that I got a job in the call center of the Austrian post service, but unfortunately I couldn’t start on April 6th. They told me that I will start in May or June, but today I got the call that the will make an exception, I will start next Wednesday with the job for a few days weeks at the office and then I’m straight allowed to do home office.

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I’m obsessed With lucky daye like since his album came out I listen to at least two of his songs a day best neo soul rmb album so far period even for 2020 for me and it came out over a year ago!!! I love his style good artist and I love the vulnerability in the music ❤️♒️🤓

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I’m not guarded but I’m cautious, I’ve been here before, I’m not phased by your compliments nor impressed by the things you posses. Nowadays it all goes in one ear and out the other, since the last one told me to let my guard down and I actually I fell for it well I haven’t been the same since, I’ve always been smart with my instincts they’ve never steered me wrong. This time around I’m taking this slow I mean why rush if you want it to last? Time usually tells all right? Soon I’ll see your flaws in plain sight. Just maybe you’ll breakdown these walls that are tight.

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There is nothing more calming after an annoying quarantine-homeoffice day than taking a walk with one of your favorite people on the phone and taking a deep breath, letting go everything thats been making you feel down the past couple of months…

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They say talking to you is a bad idea…

I guess I’m bad at listening…

  • I hope you are doing well
  • I hope you are happy
  • I hope you have everything you could want
  • I hope it was all worth it

I thought maybe one day we could be friends again but it looks like our paths aren’t likely to cross. I guess some shut doors really are meant to stay closed. Some stories have a happy ending but… Just not in the way you might think… I guess we’ll see.

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Here it goes.  A project I’ve been meaning to start for the better part of 5 years but every time I brought myself to start moving forward I found myself making up excuses to stop.  But over the last 8-10 months I’ve realized there is no reason to wait, and you’ll learn so much more from diving head first into a decision or idea; even if things don’t quite turn out the way you expected. 

For the past 5 years I’ve wanted to move tracking my fitness, health and wellbeing in a public forum, but I’ve always avoided starting it.  I’ve come to realize that avoidance was due to fear of judgement (both virtual & from those around me) and what this might won’t become one day.  However, I’m leaving that fear behind me and moving into the unknown to finally go through with ideas and ambitions that I’ve been holding back for on so long.

I’m not sure what this will become or how this will change overtime but for now I want to track how I’m managing to handle fitness and my wellbeing all while working from home and handling social distancing and any other craziness 2020 has in store.

More to come April 1, 2020.

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𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚖𝚘𝚛𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐…

i patched holes left by nails i had driven into the wall months ago.

while on the phone with him.

believing in me.

more than i.

the nails had hung a mess of ideas that soon after moved to whiteboard windows.

i washed those yesterday.

it isn’t that i am giving up.

it is that i am growing up.

& my dreams are doing the same.

Xx.. missgatzby

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