#no love for radish. illegal

[sixgills]

Excerpt from my new 64-page comic, Putty Pygmalion!  About a man (Radish) trying to create love for himself using an illegal children’s toy.  You can buy it for eight dollars here !

#indie comics #comics #horror #play doh #plasticine clay #furry #gay comics

[fatuismooches]

HIHI!!! it’s 1am but i come to you with that fluff thought i promised ya :DD (..and an angst one, it’s okay!! dottore will wipe all of our tears </3 ). i’m sorry if i’m like!! brainrotting too much!! you’re so fun to hear the opinions of, and i love talking about this

dottore with fragile reader would be so soft, i like to imagine he really does put in the effort for those picnic dates that you always talk about. Does it mean carrying you there and making a spot where it’s much warmer rather than the cold unforgiving winter in snezhnaya? having a segment travel all the way to liyue for a snack? yes. it also means kissing your forehead as he extracts blood from you, clutching your hand when he knows you’re nervous, holding you no matter how busy he is. He can have you on his lap while he works, no matter how sick you are- it’s worth it to hear his true assistants thoughts. You’ve always been the most important. (dottore probably does not like the replacement assistants and purposefully makes their jobs harder…or the segments pester them because they love you just as much).

…on the other hand

on that traveler finding fragile reader note…omegatorre deleting all/most of the other segments probably meant it was much much easier for traveler to even get to that area in the first place. normally, the lab and area would be swarmed with dottores, but because of omegatorre- now zandik will have alot less. He can’t put as much energy into creating segments because he’s focused on the cure, but *now* traveler is with who he loves most, and he has to stop them. you’re right!! la signora, childe, etc had someone that drove them to become their worst to protect their memory, futures, etc- you are everything to dottore. you’re everything to zandik. ofcourse traveler has to win somehow, escape somehow, its their story after all- so now all zandik could do, is grab you, run, and fix this.

- 💌

(x) 💌 ANON OMFG I LOVE U… ANGST + FLUFF THE TWO THINGS THAT WILL KILL ME SOME DAY 😭💕💕 dottore + fragile reader lives in our head rent free huh

oH MY GOSH THOUGH THE PICNICS- You’re so right. Fragile! Reader tends to get super nostalgic about their Akademiya days/when they weren’t sick. So a lot of times they daydream about how they use to catnap and tease Zandik under the sun while he just muttered about how “this is a waste of time” (even though he secretly enjoyed it.) And now you just think about how these things are probably never gonna happen again for a long time :( but Dottore and the clones are like. We’re going to make it happen anyway. Since it’s quite difficult for you to leave the lab, makes me think about how once I said he built a specific room for you to emulate the outside world’s scenery. He literally got the same spot you two used to go to replicated for you 🥺 And hehe you’re so right about the clones. Mfs would do anything for you even if it means going halfway across Teyvat for Fried Radish Balls. (They make it back in record speed too😭 and present to you your snack as if it’s worth more than gold)

I just love the idea of Dottore being a genuine doctor with fragile! reader 😭 like it’s funny and cute to think about him doing legitimate doctor things and not the illegal ones. Taking blood - he’s a bit surprised when he finds out you’re kind of scared of that and needles and such. Doesn’t know what to do at first but he decides to just ramble on about his experiments and discoveries (Dottore knows you enjoy it) to distract you and then gives you a little kith and chuckles when you’re surprised it’s over that quickly. (Now im just thinking abt fragile reader running away since they might not like all the shots and medicine he has to give them) Also checking your heartbeat - every time he gets hella smug and cocky because your heart always races so fast when he’s so close to you “Oh? Is everything alright? Your heart is going rather fast… certainly not normal. I wonder, what could be the reason?”

Sitting on Dot’s lap while he does work >>> Even with all the clones he has he still gets stuck checking some boring papers every once in a while, and you just like. Sit on his lap and peer at them curiously. Also bothers him by pulling his little cheeks and kissing them <3 and nod enthusiastically as he discusses science stuff. (No fr all the dottores despise the regular Fatui assistants and some of them have gone missing 💀)

Okay angst… I’ll never get over the clones being deleted im in tears (I pretend I do not see it) Zandik never missed his clones more than in this instance. Sure, they fought a lot and caused problems sometimes. But he knew that nothing would ever happen to you because they would protect you at all times. And now it just so happens that damn Traveler had to come at the worst time possible, when security was low. Of course he knows the Traveler not trust him whatsoever and he doesn’t like them either, so the idea of you being with them alarms him more than he liked to admit.

No one is immune to desire. Not Archons or humans. And you are what he desires and loves wholly, so he won’t let anything hurt you. He may be at a disadvantage, but he is the Second Harbinger for a reason. 

#smooches talks #💌 anon #fragile reader <3 #dottore love notes <3 #ALSO GO TO SLEEP EARLIER PLS 💌 ANON??? #REST UR EYES

[weiying-lanzhan-fics]

and having a marvelous time by varnes

A greatttt job weaving Sound of Music into the au. It really fit perfectly and was such a fun read. The time in the Burial Mounds of LZ and WY falling in love was funny, sweet, and perfect! The kids were the BEST ❤️

I also liked the JY and NHS’s stories. Their hard decisions and hidden depths were interesting to explore.

Really enjoyed this story 🥰

Quotes:

Seven children, living among ghosts. Untaught in the art of cultivation, but reliant on it nevertheless. Taught to believe that the world around them was made of only sharp and painful edges. Rejected by the man who refused to claim them as their father.

Wen Qionglin had told him, “Sometimes they do naughty things, but only because it’s very hard, living here, and they’re just babies.” In Lan Wangji’s many years as a teacher in Cloud Recesses, he has never met a child that acted out without cause.

Many years ago, Lan Wangji had knelt outside his mother’s house for days and days and days, waiting. He had been punished for it. He had kept kneeling anyway.

Discipline does not need to take the form of violence, he thinks.

Symptoms are not the root.

Decision made, Lan Wangji makes quick work of cleaning the dwelling before setting out to find Wen Qionglin. He is preparing dinner.

Dinner is radishes.

Lan Wangji believes in gratitude for all forms of services and sustenance, but this family truly eats an indecent amount of radishes.

————

“Xiansheng said we weren’t supposed to come in until you were better but then it was days and days and Qing-jie came out and Yuan-ge said how is baba and she said he’s even more stupid than usual and Zhen-ge said what’s that mean and Yi-ge said he’s dead probably and then I got scared that you were dead and then I came to check and you were lying here and you looked dead! So. I had to cry.”

Honestly, Wei Wuxian has to admit that Yuyu’s impressions are pretty good. He’s got the voices down, even while blubbering. Yuyu drags his arm across his nose, a trail of snot darkening his —

Wait.

“Are those Lan robes?” he asks, eyebrows shooting up and wishing desperately that he could sit up and turn his head. His intonation lacks something without the gestures, he thinks. Instead, his gaze darts to Lan Wangji, who is calmly and studiously arranging his own sleeves.

Yuyu nods. “Xiansheng said if we’re Lans we should dress neatly and app-rope-ree-at-ly,” he says, looking up at Lan Wangji for confirmation.

Lan Wangji, to Wei Wuxian’s amazement, nods seriously in agreement. “Lan Xuanyu,” he says, in his voice, that sounds — like that, still, which should be illegal, in Wei Wuxian’s opinion, “it is time for your lessons.”

“Lessons,” Wei Wuxian repeats dumbly, even as Yuyu scrambles up and off him, straightening his robes as he slides back down onto his feet. He presses a very wet, but careful, kiss to Wei Wuxian’s cheek.

“Yes, Xiansheng,” he chirps, before darting toward the door, then skidding to a stop and muttering to himself, “Do not rush too fast,” before proceeding again, much more slowly.

Wei Wuxian gapes.

“That’s not quite it,” Lan Wangji notes, voice edging toward dry. Wei Wuian has never heard his voice be dry before. When they had met during the war, he always just sounded like … like Wei Wuxian’s very existence made him mad. “But he is correct in essence.”

————

He blows out a long breath. “Okay,” he says again. “That’s enough for now. Finish your lessons. I’ve got — stuff. To do. In the Demon Subdue Palace. So don’t come in for a while. Be good for Lan Zhan, all right?”

Six little Lans gasp. “You can’t call him that,” Zizhen hisses, scandalized. “It’s Xiansheng!”

“He’s your xiansheng, not mine,” Wei Wuxian snorts. “Because you’re a baby, and I’m the terrifying Yiling Patriarch.”

“Terrifying, my foot,” Jingyi tells him. “You’re the least scary person in the whole world, other than jiujiu.”

“Jiujiu’s a fierce corpse,” Wei Wuxian points out.

Jingyi considers this. “Okay, you’re less scary than jiujiu, but it’s on a technicality.”

Hm. That’s not ... where Wei Wuxian was going with that.

“I’m going to do evil and scary experiments in the Demon Subdue Palace,” he announces, turning his nose up and handing Mianmian off to Yuyu.

E, 108k

Summary:

Wen Qing relaxes minutely, scrutinizing him. “Then,” she asks, “why are you here, Lan-er-gongzi?”

He thinks of seven children, living here, surrounded by ghosts, fathered — fathered? — by the one who harnesses resentment to command the dead. Children he has named, inexplicably, Lan. Wen Qionglin is a fierce corpse, and yet he apparently talks and thinks and makes his own decisions. The children call him jiujiu. The children climb on his lap and ignore his instructions and say things like “he’s dead” with a careless lilt in their voices.

Whatever the Yiling Patriarch is doing, whatever Wei Wuxian wants, Lan Wangji does not think it is an act of war.

So he does not say, “I am here to neutralize the Yiling Patriarch.”

He does not say, “Sentiment is gathering against you.”

He does not say, “First liberate, second suppress, third eliminate.”

Lying is forbidden, so Lan Wangji bows his head and says something true: “The Lan sect has very recently learned of seven disciples living in Yiling. I have come to attend their education.”

-

OR: It's a Sound of Music AU. Sort of.

#wangxian #wei wuxian #wei ying #lan wangji #lan zhan #wangxian fic rec #the untamed fic #the untamed fanfiction #untamed fic #mdzs fic #mdzs fanfiction #sound of music #alternate au #multiple povs

[hungry-little-owl]

13 May: birthday dinner at 1921 Angel Hill, Bury St Edmunds

this was a special dining experience, as Loverboy took me to a Michelin-starred restaurant for my birthday dinner. it was of course exquisite, and still a very comfortable atmosphere. I tried frogs legs, foie gras, and duck, liked everything except the texture of foie gras, and also enjoyed two delightfully strong cocktails.

more thoughts on each course below, but for now 11/10, definitely recommend, and ideally will make our special spot for future celebratory dinners.

we chose to do the 5 course tasting menu, which began with an assortment of canapés, which are extra-fancy hors d'oeuvres. the selection included smoked tuna on an anchovy cracker, tikka frog leg, mushroom croquette & quail's egg, something with beef tartare, something in caviar, and other things I forget what they were but they were delicious little morsels.

1st course: asparagus soup

this was so delectable it made me tear up a little bit. genuinely. I love asparagus to begin with but this "velouté" was next level. the truffels and quail egg were served in the bowl, and then the creamy velouté was poured at the table. I could have licked the bowl clean if it wouldn't have embarrassed my husband.

2nd course: wasabi mooli salad

the restaurant was able to accommodate my shellfish allergy, and made this dish without the mersea crab for me. the substitute was simply more pickled mooli (white radish), which was very good but had a very strong flavour on its own. I know I am not one to critique a Michelin star restaurant, but I do wish that they had actually substituted another more mellow-flavoured element in place of the crab. something like grilled chicken or even tofu, but... what do I know! all that to say, this was good but it was the only dish I did not finish as the pickled flavour of the mooli was just too strong to be enjoyed on its own for me.

3rd course: surf n turf but make it fancy ;)

this was another originally-shellfish dish, but they substituted the scallops for seared sea bass on my plate. chicken wings and chicken gravy complimented the fish unexpectedly well, and I could have eaten a whole basket of the morels alone to be honest. If I could order a full dinner sized plate from the tasting menu selection, it would be this dish.

4th course: duck and white bean cassoulet

the seared duck breast was served with rhubarb, and while I loved the duck I was not a fan of the rhubarb. i ate some of it but not all. I also cut the duck meat away from the strip of fat, which my partner said was meant to be eaten together. I cannot stand the texture of animal fat, so I may have committed a faux pas by cutting it off but I wanted to enjoy the duck meat in the way I knew I would.

the little sauce pan served as a side dish contained a white bean cassoulet (beans and shredded beef, but fancy), and foie gras. I imagine the foie gras was imported or produced ethically, as foie gras production is illegal in the UK. I loved the bean and beef cassoulet, but the texture of the foie gras was not very palatable to me.

in order to not make it sound like I didn't enjoy this course, because I very much did, I want to state in no uncertain terms that the duck was i n c r e d i b l e and also I want the white bean cassoulet served with everything else I eat from now on. just without foie gras ;)

5th course: dessert!

the pastry crumbles, the sorbet, the yuzu curd, the pudding-esque caramel-y strip of delicious goop winding beneath it all was *literally chef's kiss* I could kiss the chef for this. my massive sweet tooth wished for more but my rational, polite side knew it was the perfect little bite of sweetness after the savory dishes that preceded it.

again, 11/10 dining experience. I do not know exactly how Michelin stars are earned and maintained, but I dare say this restaurant is certainly deserving. and I want more asparagus velouté soup.

#american in england #get in my belly #fine dining #michelin star #1921 angel hill #angel hill #bury st edmunds #foie gras #veloute #cassoulet #michelin guide #canapes #hors d'oeuvres #mooli raddish #foodie

[nhebi]

chapter i

warning : major spoiler, afab reader, mention of cigarette, fist fight, illegal trading, mention of weeds, dysfunctional family, drinking behavior (in upcoming chapters)

Drip!

You're woken up by the cold feeling on your forehead — noticing a small dribble of water above your bed. Looking at your nightstand, you remember a card Robin gave to you a week ago in case you need something that involves building, wood or something like that.

"Ah, I think I need to call her," you stop your hand from reaching out the phone, looking at the grandfather clock at the corner of your room.

It's two in the morning.

Who in the world will accept your call during such an hour?

"Hello, it's Robin. Who am I speaking to right now?"

Well, you have your answer.

"Oh, mm, hey, Robin," you bite your lower lip. "I need you to fix my ceiling."

You explain to her which area that needs to be repaired and perhaps replaced if the damage is irreparable. Unfortunately, it seems like the whole ceiling and floor need to be replaced because the creaks you hear underneath make your sleep getting worse than before.

"Alright, have your request on list," she replies, a small clap is heard from the other line, "Is six good? I don't think I'm early enough at three," she giggles.

"Yeah, do as you think fit," you reply before end the call, putting a bucket underneath the water leak and decide to sleep on a sofa instead, hoping you can get at least a few hours of sleep.

Knock! Knock!

"Oh! You seem.. restless, dearie," Robin gives you an expression full of motherly worries — something that you don't like to see early in the morning because of your bitter sleep.

"Just a bit tired. Come on in, I made some breakfast in case you haven't eaten anything," you push the door to give her space to enter and watch her tapping her boot against the floor — hearing a light creak coming out from it.

"Good thing I brought oak. Seems like these fellas you got are older than me to create such a noise," she drops piles of wood beside the door step and takes a seat on the dining table, looking at the breakfast with awe.

"These are amazing!" She exclaims, taking a bite from pancake with drizzle of locust honey and some fresh berries you picked yesterday. "Can I get the recipe? I'm sure my children will like these," she gives you a warm smile before you scribble it down on a piece of paper.

"I also write one for vanilla milk bread that you eat," you watch her slipping it into her pocket. "Who are your children? I'm sure they're around my age," you smile, feeling curious about them — and might know someone who's close to Sebastian and pry some information about this mysterious dark, tall and handsome man you met at the saloon.

"I have a daughter named Maru. She works at Harvey's clinic and usually creates couples of robot or something metallic at her room sometimes," she smiles, telling her that Maru is het daughter with Demetrius, her current husband — who's a scientist.

"There's my eldest son named Sebastian—"

Her rambles about her son suddenly got quiet down while her lips keep moving — with a faint frown once in a while whenever she mentions something about room or computer.

"He also loves to leave house late night," she pouts, playing with her spoon, "wish he does it during the daylight instead."

After finishing her breakfast, Robin begins her project as you leave the house to visit your small farm that you started few days ago by planting some parsnip, onion and radish with wormwood surrounding them — to keep some pests away from ruining your hard work.

"I think they're good enough now," you give each of them decent amount of fertilizer and water before getting inside the barn and coop — placing down couple of fresh hays you got from Marnie as their breakfast.

"Eat well, children. You need to grow up well to pay me back," you crouch down to pet a chick's head, giggling when it nuzzles its bead against your finger — trying to show you some affection.

You walk to the empty area beside the farm where you found your grandfather's grave. Placing down a basket of fresh fruits for an offering, you kneel down and begin to pray for his peace up there before brushing some dust away from your knees and check out each tapper on each tree — expecting it to be full before the end of the month.

"And there we go!" You place down couples of products into the shipping bin, expecting it'll give you a lot tomorrow morning like yesterday.

It seems like the spring will end soon because you can notice how the summer breeze begin to chase you out from the beach with Willy talking to you about his childhood with his father.

"You know? My pappy will be happy to meet someone like you. You got that talent for fishing, y'know?" He begins to take another big catch and put it inside his bucket with couples of medium sized fishes.

"Is that so? I'm still training and catch small one only," you reply, looking at your half-empty bucket then your reflection against the water.

"Don't be like that, sweetheart. You're amazing, that's for sure," you nod your head, playing with the end of your skirt, "I know. Thanks for the validation, Elliott."

"It's nothing, flower," he replies before sitting down beside you as Willy heads into his place.

The faint sound of pelican and wave numbing down your ears in a pleasant way as Elliott lets out a sigh full of relief. "I just finished my novel," he starts, looking far to the horizon, "the one that's based on your favourite genre."

Elliott has been struggling with his writing and feels happy after talking to you about his struggle — finding an inspiration to write about while looking down at messy scribbles, ink spots and bit of miswritten words on his drafts.

"Back then, everyone will laugh at my choice for writing sappy romantic stories," he smiles wryly, "yet, you helped me instead."

He places his hand on top of your head, giving a generous head rub before smoothing out your hairs. "You're a great friend and person, you know? I hope you find an equal to love," Elliott stands up from his position, telling you he needs to make sure his novel looks good enough to enjoy by others before it's presented.

It's cloudy but doesn't show any sign it'll rain any time soon, so you decide to go to the lake on the mountain with some sweets to enjoy with Linus nearby — hoping you can get a bigger fish for dinner tonight.

"Well, well, well," Linus catches your figure from his tent, "if it's not the generous farmer who brings me her cooking and baking everyday," he steps out from his tent and gives you a light smile, pointing at the small fire before his tent.

"I caught a big catch last night. Care to enjoy one with me?" You give him a quick nod and take out a small bundle of chewy cookies for him and lay it down, watching Linus grilling it and checking it out once it a while so it won't burn.

It's almost a month since your arrival here. Everyone's been treating you nice (well, some still tad bit cold, but it's alright!) and like the gifts you bring everyday. From a simple flower for Leah and Evelyn until the Pink Cake for Marnie and Abigail.

"And here's your part. Don't worry, already deboned it for you," Linus gives you a wink before enjoying the fish. You watch him in silent — feeling happy that he loved his meal before give it a go.

The fish's quite fresh so it didn't leave any bad aftertaste on your taste buds. There's a bit of hidden, small bones inside the fish (though, you bit on them to break it into smaller pieces and swallow them).

After enjoying your small lunch with Linus, you notice that Robin is walking towards her house, probably just finished her little project before you walk down and enter her house — looking at various objects and decorations inside.

"Oh, hey! I was just gonna inform you about your house," she smiles, placing her elbows on the counter, "I already finished them and will send you the bill if you don't have any requests. But, since you're here, how about checking out my catalogue?"

She shoves a thick catalogue book into your arms as you begin to open the first page — looking at couples of furniture and decoration for indoor and outdoor.

"These looks amazing — though, this is not what I want," you shake your head, giving her a sweet smile. "But, the cottage's a bit too small for me — mind to expand it? Maybe add the second floor and basement, if you don't mind?"

Robin doesn't give you any direct answer. Instead, she disappears to the corridor at your right with a 'wait here!'. Not giving a second thought about her, you decide to sit down on a soft, plush chair nearby — waiting for her.

"Oh, you?"

You raise your head and collide with Sebastian's gaze — not expecting to see him at such an hour. "What are you doing here?" He takes few steps to your direction, not giving any question until you reply him.

"Just, house and.. remodeling," you can't help but feeling like pulling your hair away at your reply.

He's a bit silent for a bit — perhaps feeling confused about your answer, thinking about another question to understand you or finding you as a weird person who can't communicate like a decent human being.

"Remodeling your house? Well, that place needs a lot of reparations — actually, you need to build it from zero,"

"Found it— Oh, Sebby!" Robin lets out a squeal and pinches Sebastian's cheek to his dismay.

You look at their mother-son bonding, chuckling lightly into your hand and can understand how much Robin loves him despite his rebel against her language of love.

"You never told me you know the new farmer," she pouts at him, who looks at you for help.

You're stunned because actually, you don't know him. Besides the fact that you know his name and face — you don't know that he's Robin's son or someone who loves to sleep in the basement.

"We met at the Saloon a few weeks ago," you blurt out, "nothing close. Just exchanging a few words and go," you continue, not feeling sure if Robin will buy it.

Out of your expectation, she believes you! Telling you how 'he isn't a person who will be interested in someone after their first meeting' before calling you to see the blueprint on her hand.

"For this part, I think the second floor doesn't have to be excessive— an empty room and bedroom for children will be enough,"

"Why would she need it? She's still too young to think about having a child," Sebastian cuts her mother off, who looks at him with mouth agape, "did you just give me your opinion?" she asks, lacing with a worried and happy tone.

Based on what she told me about during breakfast (at least from what you remembered), Sebastian hates to butt into unnecessary talks — or if it involves Demetrius.

Or even worse, if it's Demetrius who starts it.

"It seems like she doesn't know what to say because of your—"

"I want!"

Both of them turn their heads towards your direction, wide eyes and slightly ajar mouth. "Actually, you don't—" "I do!" You cut Robin off, telling her that you love children and would like to have room for one — or two.

"Wow, easy there, girlie. Take a second for a deep breath," Sebastian places his hands over your shoulders, giving you a sign to stop panicking and replying impulsively.

You're brought back to the reality after hearing his comment and take a deep breath — realising that you might come out as an aggressive client to Robin. "I'm sorry for my manner— I love children and will be happy to have a room for one," you play with the end of your sleeve, feeling nervous about her reaction.

"That's great!" She gives you a gentle squeeze on the shoulder, praying for your happiness and hoping you'll invite her to your wedding someday.

"Whoever marries you must be a great person — perhaps, Alex?" Her eyes shine brightly, full of expectations.

"Or Sam! Jodi told me how he always praises your sweets and little gift you prepare every day—"

"Pfft— Aight, I need to head out for a smoke," Sebastian shoves his hand into the pocket before leaving both of you dumbfounded at his sudden outburst then focusing on the remodel back.

Walking back to your place, you notice a brief glimpse of golden spike peaking out from behind a tree and decide to get closer to it slowly, jumping out to see a startled Sam and — laughing Sebastian?

"Should have given me a more gentle surprise instead of this," Sam pouts at you before leaning his head down, asking for a small head pat as your apology.

"I thought you'll like pizza more instead of head pat," you grin, looking at his sparkling eyes. "You can make pizza?" You give him a nod, telling him that you'll bring it to his house tonight.

Sebastian who stands a few steps away from both of you can't help but feel curious about how you can get close to everyone he knows — talking to them in such a manner that told him you've been friends with them since diaper.

His eyes suddenly catch Sam's arm slinging over your shoulder, swatting it away gently. "Don't make her feel uncomfy," he comments on Sam. "It's alright! He means no harm, so I'm okay with his arm," you reply, reassuring Sam from the sudden guilt that came to him.

"Why do you feel okay with him touching you like that? You're not even his friend."

#stardew valley #sebastian stardew valley #sebastian stardew #stardew valley fic #stardew sebastian #sebastian imagine #sebastian fic #sebastian x reader

[uno-writing]

Various Masterlist Pt 2

Crazy how reaching 500 posts will cause all of the masterlists to hit the link limit

-John Abusing his Pretty Privilege

-Main Cast's Vibes

-Main Cast in Maid Cafe + Their Crush Walks In

-Dumbass Crew Torturing Arlo at the Mall

-Main Cast Dealing w/ High School Rumors

-Arlo gets Genuinely Upset at the Chaos

-Every Friend Group Should Include..., Fixed Version w/ Isen

-Main Cast At Museum OneShot

-Every Friend Group Should Include... PT 2

-Sera's Low Tier Friends React to her Getting her Power Back

-Main Cast's Fav Wholesome Pics w/ John

-Main Cast Music Genres

-What I Would Do w/ Main Cast

-Jealousy HC

-Main Cast's Style

-BDay HC

-Main Cast in a Circus

-Main Cast React to Isen Stalking a Girl

-Main Cast Ice Skating

-Main Cast Vacation

-Main Cast Illegally Consumption

-Blyke Tries out the Gelmet

-Main Cast as Thieves

-How Do They Simp???

-Musicals???

-Actor AU

-Wellston Tea Accounts

-Main Cast as Love Songs

-What I HC the Main Cast's Sexualities Are

-How the Main Cast Flirt

-Main Cast in Australia

-First Thing That Pops in My Brain when I Think of the Characters

-Destructive John Angst

-Main Cast Song Vibes

-Main Cast's Roles in KPop Group by Radish Anon

-Blyke Loses His Ability

-Main Cast Middle School Stories

-John's Revenge

-Main Cast as Kids pt 2

-Dumbass Trio + Sera Texting Styles

-Main Cast's Icks

-How the Main Cast Hug

-Main Cast Songs Anon Add On

-UnO Cast and Scars

-Main Cast Play Baby in Yellow

-More Main Cast Songs

-Main Cast Playing Pocky

-Main Cast's Love Tropes

-Main Cast's S/O Icks

-Main Cast as Yandere

-Main Cast Take Care of Reader During Depressive Episode

-Main Cast Omegaverse HC

-Isen's Gay Panic

-Domestic Things the Main Cast's Good At

-Anything but a Backpack Day at Wellston

-My Simp List

-Main Cast as My Anons + Analysis of Boba Anon

-Main Cast Nicknames

-Main Cast Ranked Most to Least Likely that I'd Fight Them

-Outfit Styles for Main Cast (-Arlo + Sera)

-Main Cast Omegaverse Scents HC

-Main Cast Reacts to John Having a Boyfriend from Another School

-Wellston at Denny's

-Clingy! John HC

-Main Cast w/ Touch Starved + Touch Averse S/O

-Main Cast + Love Bites

-Main Cast React to S/O Saying "Fuck Me!" Out of Frustration

-Main Cast Doing Math

-Main Cast Sentimental Items

-Main Cast in Science Lab

-Main Cast Reacting to My Works

-Main Cast Piercings

-Main Cast Jewelry

-Dorm Kitchens

-Main Cast's Pets

-Main Cast's Fav Movies

-Main Cast go Bowling

-Main Cast's Laughs

-Main Cast's True Powers

-Main Cast's Tumblr Blogs

-Different Main Cast Hair

-Main Cast Reacts to Older Brother! Blyke

-Main Cast Comforts Reader During Finals

-Main Cast in Squid Game

-Arlo w/ Unhinged Tumblr

-Blyke dies

-Sleepy Koala John

-Main Cast Genshin HC (provided by Sunflower Anon)

-Cast's Perfumes

-Main Cast Watching Bee Movie

-Main Cast Insecurities

-Main Cast's S/O Comes Out to Them

-Flexible! Isen Messes w/ Main Cast

-Main Cast's Instruments

-Clingy John Scenarios

-The Most Annoying Band

-Main Cast Fav Colors

#masterlist #unordinary headcanon #berriwords

[robininthelabyrinth]

Tell me about that time the Yiling Patriarch accidentally acquired a harem?

Untamed verse

It was Nie Huaisang’s fault.

He would argue it was the fault of the extremely stupid fierce corpse that violently lunged right at him when he was trailing behind his older brother and the others on a night hunt he didn’t want to go on, causing him to hide behind his saber and therefore accidentally taking the first kill of the night; his brother had been so pleased (and trying very hard not to laugh at him) that he’d agreed to Nie Huaisang’s request for a vacation.

He’d even allowed him to go visit Yiling, with one of their cousins saying in passing that Nie Huaisang should probably not let anyone know who he was or why he was there given the political scandal it would cause. Nie Huaisang had left while his brother was still arguing with their cousin about whether or not the Nie sect gave a single fuck about political scandal; he was pretty sure the actual argument they were having by proxy was his brother yet again defending Nie Huaisang’s right to be the heir, and those arguments went better if he wasn’t around.

So he went to Yiling to visit Wei Wuxian. He liked Wei Wuxian, they’d been good friends at the Cloud Recesses no matter how short a time, and he’d liked him every time they’d met afterwards, and really it seemed rude not to come with house-warming presents even if he hadn’t been invited the house-warming party itself.

“I fled here in the middle of the night, in the rain, illegally,” Wei Wuxian said. “There was no party.”

Nie Huaisang patted him on the shoulder. “It’s fine, really. I promise I’m not insulted. I’m very forgettable; you wouldn’t have considered involving me at all.”

“I’m tell you, I didn’t have a party.” Wei Wuxian frowned thoughtfully. “Maybe I should have a party?”

“We are not having a party,” Wen Qing said, sounding a little testy, but Wei Wuxian handed her a plate of meat – it was a traditional house-warming gift, and it wasn’t as if the Unclean Realm wasn’t chock full of people who would be more than happy to go practice their sabers against wild boars so that Nie Huaisang could drag along a preservation chest full of pork – and she stopped complaining.

“We could invite Jiang Cheng,” Nie Huaisang said. “You know he can’t resist an invitation to a party.”

“Did you not hear about the fight -”

“Party invitation.”

“…it might make him less angry, actually.”

“I’ll go get decorations!”

That was how Nie Huaisang found himself in the town at the bottom of the Burial Mounds, shopping; that part was probably still fine, but then he’d made some sort of slip-up in casual chitchat and everyone in the town figured out that he was visiting the Yiling Patriarch.

“Are you one of his disciples?” someone asks.

“No, of course not,” Nie Huaisang said at once, because forget his brother, he had some very scary great-uncles that would find him and rip him to pieces if he ever denied being a Nie.

“Then why are you here? I thought he’d been rejected by the whole cultivation world.”

“Uh,” Nie Huaisang said.

“Is there going to be trouble?”

“I don’t –”

“They’re celebrating something,” another person chimed in, looking at the bags Nie Huaisang was carrying. “What could they possibly be celebrating? A marriage?”

“Definitely not,” Nie Huaisang said.

“You couldn’t possibly be here willingly, could you?”

“No,” Nie Huaisang said, finally annoyed. “I was sent as a sacrifice by the cultivation world to join the dreadful Yiling Patriarch’s harem as a panacea against his threats to conquer the entire world through a little bit of unorthodox cultivation that involves a great deal of complicated flute playing and exactly zero practice because he’s obnoxiously talentedly like that. It’s all very tragic at first, but eventually we will overcome all obstacles and he’ll make me his empress of an empire composed of ghost puppets. Happy now?”

Maybe he should become a writer or something, because apparently they were very happy about it, and the story spread like lightning.

“I cannot believe you,” Wen Qing said, since Wei Wuxian hadn’t yet caught his breath once from all the howling laughter he was doing. “Of all the irresponsible, ridiculous –”

Nie Huaisang wasn’t sure what he was supposed to do about it, and it only got worse when Lan Wangji showed up to visit and just – refused to leave.

That surely wasn’t related to the harem rumors, though of course the presence of an unbearably pretty man like Lan Wangji just made the rumors worse, especially since he was very obviously from a different sect than Nie Huaisang.

According to the rumors, there was intrigue now: a more beautiful concubine had appeared, challenging Nie Huaisang’s efforts to get the redeem the vile Yiling Patriarch through the power of love and a great deal of sex, and of course there would be all sorts of jockeying for position happening.

Jiang Cheng’s furious arrival to yell at Wei Wuxian (and to attend the party, because he really couldn’t resist a party invitation – he hated being left out) only convinced them all that there were at least three separate sects fighting for attention, as if Wei Wuxian were an emperor.

“I can’t – I’m dying –” Wei Wuxian sobbed with laughter, burying his face into Lan Wangji’s shoulder. “Lan Zhan, help. It’s too funny. I’m an emperor now. And I can’t even grow potatoes!”

“Radishes are more efficient,” Wen Qing hissed.

“The common people are really very strange,” Nie Huaisang opined from where he was drawing over in his corner. Wen Qing believed everything to be his fault, so he’d promised that he’d do something nice and calming and not disruptive like drawing; he’d bought himself some ink and a great deal of paper as proof of his good intentions. “They’ll believe anything.”

“Don’t you start,” she snapped. “You’re drawing porn. Of this!”

Wei Wuxian’s head snapped up. “You are? Is it any good? Wait – who is it of?”

“It’d better not be of me with him,” Jiang Cheng grumbled, serving himself some of the pork with radishes. “I’ll kill you.”

“Mostly Second Master Lan,” Nie Huaisang admitted. “He’s the only one staying still long enough for me to get a good view.”

That made Lan Wangji frown and come over – which, joke’s on him, Nie Huaisang has no shame about his excellent artistic skills.  

“Oh, well done,” Wei Wuxian said, peeping over Lan Wangji’s shoulder at the artwork. “Is that me with the legs in the air?”

“Yes. Can you pose later so I can get the face right?”

“Obviously yes!”

Lan Wangji’s ears were very red for some reason.

“Shouldn’t Wei Wuxian be the attacker?” Jiang Cheng asked, coming over as well. “Not that I care about any of this. But if the story is that he’s the emperor –”

“I can’t disappoint my readers by breaking up my romance with him,” Nie Huaisang explained. “And between me and Wei-xiong, I’m obviously more fit for the role of the pure maiden in distress – there’s a great deal of convention in erotic art circles, you wouldn’t expect it – and so I’m having Second Master Lan be the seducer instead, see? That way there is even more conflict.”

“I’m still going to kill you for including my brother,” Wen Qing said.

“I didn’t give him any sex scenes! He’s a wallflower! And you’re the Yiling Patriarch’s right hand man; what more do you want?”

“For my brother not to have fans that want to see him naked!”

“How do you even know about that?” Wei Wuxian asked.

“I read the mail,” Wen Qing said. “We’ve gotten an awful lot of it in the last week.”

“…is there any about me?” Jiang Cheng, who’d never met a competition he didn’t have to win, asked.

“Oh, yes, you’re very popular, Jiang-xiong,” Nie Huaisang assured him. “I included some falsified backstory about the two of you being childhood friends torn apart by Wei-xiong’s turn to evil and unorthodoxy –”

Both of them looked distinctly uncomfortable.

“– and now everyone wants to see you have a sandwich with the Wen sibilings.”

“Have a sandwich?” Jiang Cheng asked, distracted. “Are they hungry or something?”

“They certainly want to lick –”

“A sandwich means what,” Jiang Cheng yelled after Wei Wuxian finished whispering in his ear.

#mdzs #nie huaisang #wei wuxian #lan wangji #jiang cheng #my fic #my fics #oneiriad #wwx harem

[restingdomface]

USA AU where WWX is a wealthy student studying classical music????? Lol no. USA AU where WWX is a trailer trash redneck with a toddler on his hip farming potatoes (because potatoes are more popular than radishes here and he can finally live his dreams of eating French fries ten times a week) and makin illegal moonshine with Uncle Four while they all work to get Wen Qing through her last year of med school and Wen Ning through the last year of his pre-med program and WWX occasionally works on cars in town but rn he’s the only thing keeping their tractor from dying for the fourth time and simultaneously entertaining a toddler to keep baby A-Yuan from eating dirt.

How does wangxian happen? IDFK WWX is probably in town with the baby when he sees his old private school classmate that he totally WASNT flirting with shut up JC and ends up going out to lunch with him when LWJ says he’s just passing through and they should catch up some time (which is taken 100% seriously because WWX knows LWJ doesn’t say things he doesn’t mean so he’s all ‘damn, rich boy wanna buy me lunch I’m down’) and they go out to dinner where WWX tells him about how he met the Wens in college and ended up living with them and even tho they’re not rich they’re his family and now he’s fully adopted the baby and doesn’t want to ever leave them and they always have enough to get by and WWX can still tinker on his electronics in between gardening and naps and working on the tractor and he’s even taken up knitting/crocheting since little A-Yuan came along. And LWJ. Just falls. Even more in love. With him. Like. He thought maybe those feelings would go away one day, that he’d stop being so hopelessly in love with the boy that he hasn’t seen in years. But now he’s seen him in person, with a baby on his hip and looking like sunshine as a farmer and daddy and. He just. Can’t go back.

So obviously he asks WWX out. Because why wouldn’t he. And they don’t even have to go out to a fancy restaurant if WWX doesn’t want to. They can just. Spend the night at WWX’s undoubtedly cramped little house (where WWX is roommates with WQ and WN and baby A-Yuan is probably going to outgrow his crib in WWX’s room in a few years and they need to start worrying about who’s gonna have to move out and when because A-Yuan already sort of sleeps in WWX’s bed more than he should and tbh if left to their own devices, A-Yuan would probably hop between all their beds until he’s like 7 or something lol) and WWX is enchanted that his HS crush wants to spend time with him and the baby and it takes him a while to realize all this is really happening but. When he finally figures it out, he’s so happy he could burst.

Anyways. LWJ eventually moves in with them (when A-Yuan is closer to four and so let’s just say they’re all getting very used to sleeping in the same bed as someone with little feet) and his wedding present (lol they’re not married yet, but LWJ’s fam is totally traditional and insists that LWJ give WWX a massive courting gift, which mainly came up as an idea when they saw where WWX lived lol) to WWX is to take a part of the land they all live on and build a two story house with like six bedrooms or more so the baby can have his own room and no one has to leave and Granny even gives up her own little double wide (not a bad looking house, but she is getting older, and needs assistance more often now days) to take one of the ground floor bedrooms and there’s even a basement for WWX to play with machines and WWX never has to leave the Wen’s.

JYL get’s married and JZX wonders why all these rednecks are at his wedding. JYL loves her in-laws. JGS has a heart attack at seeing all the low-bred trailer trash and no one really thinks to revive him, whoops. But tbh, all WWX’s former classmates are a little shocked to see his family, especially the ones who know LWJ and him are engaged. Like. This bitch really moves to the woods to farm potatoes and make moonshine and still manages to marry one of the richest boys in their school????? Damn.

#the grandmaster of demonic cultivation #the untamed #mdzs #wei wuxian #lan wangji #wangxian #a yuan #wen remnants #wen qing #wen ning

[adhd-wifi]

MDZS Modern AU Fic Tips (Festivals)

So I asked a while back if anyone was interested in some fic tips for writing Chinese modern AUs, and y’all seemed enthusiastic. But…when I tried putting it all in a single post it got…really…really long…

So I split them into a bunch of posts (Yes I copy-pasted this intro on all of them because I’m lazy)! Here are the links:

Names & Stuff

Modern Chinese Cultural Stuff

Superstitions & Beliefs 

Festivals (You are here)

Living in China

Anyways, these are based on my experiences living in Singapore and China, and I hope these posts are helpful. On to it.

Content Warning: Magpie Bashing

Festivals (Warning: LONG. Good Luck.)

Note: I do not have personal experience with all of these. For those I have celebrated, I’ll indicate with a (*). Also I’ll only be talking about how we celebrate them (typically), because diving into the history and meanings of it all would take like 8 years (not literally but you know). Fee free to look them up, and ask your nearest Chinese human for any extra details. If they know it. You might want to look up what the lunar calendar is too. It’s basically the moon cycle calendar, but I am too bad at memorizing how it works so I just google the dates every single year. 

Also, I’m restricting this post to ONLY Chinese & Singaporean versions of celebrations. Many other regional ethnic groups celebrate the same or similar festivals, but I don’t know enough about their versions of the festivities. Another thing is that my family is from Dalian & Harbin in the NorthEast, so there is more Northern bias in my post so I might have some info that is inaccurate to festivities in the South. I did try to search for some South-specific traditions, since Yunmeng/Hubei is in South China, but I’m not entirely sure how accurate those details are.

Chinese New Year (*) - Late Jan to Early Feb (15 days after CNY day)

Before CNY, often on the eve of the actual date, we decorate our homes with red (don’t you dare skip out on decking your home with RED) decorations such as lanterns, red and orange flowers, those vertical paper banners with auspicious calligraphy on them (what are they called in English???) and whatever these things are

As kids, my sister and I would make those loop paper chains out of red and yellow paper a lot. We never knew what to do with them when the festivities were over

Spring cleaning is extremely important, we usually do it (extensively) from about a month before the festivities (and get yelled at a lot by our Chinese mothers & grandmothers especially) up to CNY Eve

Please don’t do any cleaning, particularly sweeping or throwing the trash out, on the day itself. You’re throwing the new year luck away. 

Other preparations include: buying new clothes, often with at least one red thing, visiting friends during the month prior so you don’t have to do so on the day itself and giving them little gifts and red packets, & burning new year offerings for ancestors

You will probably see lion dances on the streets and during new year parades a lot, sometimes accompanied by dragon dances, though the former is much more common. They also tend to give private performances at a discount during the CNY period, though lion dances aren’t restricted to only perform on CNY and in fact perform for special events in general, not just cultural festivities

On the night of CNY Eve, we have reunion dinners, in which we gather our entire extended family (when possible) and have a really loud, really energetic dinner party while watching the CNY Spring Gala on TV together. Or just eating if we don’t have access to a TV.

Include fish on the menu. At least one major fish main dish, not a side dish. It’s from a lucky saying: 年年有余 - nián nián yǒu yú, meaning something along the lines of “To have more prosperity this year”. The Chinese word for fish (鱼 - yú) sounds the same as 余, therefore we have fish every year. Yes it’s a pun, as many Chinese superstitions and beliefs are

Other menu items you could include: homemade dumplings (a FUCKton of them), uncut noodles, chicken or duck, pork, Chinese radish/carrot cake (side note: why the FUCK do Western articles ALWAYS translate this to “turnip cake” it’s made out of fucking RADISH or CARROT I swear to HELL), Chinese yam cakes, good alcohol and traditional sweets like tang yuan (this is basically the original version of mochi, filled with black or normal sesame filling and served in a clear, sweet soup)

There’s also one Cantonese dish known as (撈起 - Lo Hei) which is basically a salad of shredded carrot, radish, cucumber with strips of sashimi-style fish strips like salmon. You serve it to the table, pour crushed peanuts, fried dough crisps, and sweet sauce all over it, and your entire table reaches in with chopsticks and mixes everything together. It’s more common in Singapore and Malaysia than it actually is in Hong Kong and China, but I’ve had it in China before in the springtime. I fucking hate it. 

By the way, a fun game to play is the coin dumpling game. Basically, when you make the dumplings, put clean coins into some of them, and whoever eats the dumpling with the coins inside are considered super lucky for the year. I wasn’t ever allowed to make them though, my 20 years of dumpling-folding have failed me I still suck at it so everyone knows which ones are mine.

Usually, relatives living overseas would go to China for the New Year if they can, and they would take turns hosting the dinner each year. You would traditionally only have a reunion dinner in a family home, mostly because everything outside is closed

During the celebrations, lighting firecrackers and sparklers is part of the fun. Keep a close eye on the kids. 

Wearing traditional clothing isn’t necessary, but encouraged

At midnight, the younger, unmarried family members will present their married elders with gifts (usually two oranges per person or a small handmade craft) while wishing them well for the year, and in turn the elders will return the wishes and gift the youngsters red packets with money. 

The celebration period lasts for 15 days, but people typically go back to work a day or two after the actual CNY date

Personal note: I have only actually celebrated CNY once in China, back when I was tiny, so most of this is based on Singaporean experiences, what I know my in-China relatives, who live in Dalian, do, and what I’ve double checked online. But CNY is huge in China and many places celebrate it differently, so don’t get too worried about following this to the dot.

The Lantern Festival - Early to Mid Feb

In Singapore it’s actually illegal to celebrate the Lantern Festival traditionally on a large scale because of the potential fire hazards & pollution, so it’s somewhat merged with the Mid-Autumn festival here and thus I don’t know as much about this one in a “proper” Chinese context (I had to go to school in Singapore this time of year)

But anyways

The Lantern Festival comes immediately after CNY, on the 15th day of the first lunar month. It’s seen as a day of freedom for all, so everyone takes to the streets, lighting up the night with candles and lanterns

Lantern-walks are common, in which everyone holds a lantern - there are many kinds to choose from - and just walk up and down the streets together

These lantern-walks often take place alongside the official festival parades 

The dragon dances mentioned earlier are more likely to appear during the lantern festival than CNY, and the lion dances of course come as well

It gets crowded a lot. Hold onto your kids. 

Lantern riddles are fun games, in which they string up lanterns with papers hanging from them. Upon these papers are the riddles, and if you got them right you could win prizes. Or at least bragging rights amongst your family and friend groups

If you’re in a river town, you’ll likely have a chance to see water lanterns, which are also common during the Mid-Autumn Festival. They’re paper lanterns, sometimes made in lotus form, carrying wishes of prosperity. This can come in two forms, an official river lantern parade where they make HUGE lanterns for show, or smaller lanterns that just flow along. Sounds perfect for a Yunmeng Jiang family celebration, don’t you think?

Another one is the sky lanterns, which CQL watchers will recognize. People will gather together, usually on a hill, and release lanterns into the skies. Some will make them themselves, but most people will just buy pre-made ones. Like in CQL, you make a wish upon these lanterns, then sit down and eat tang yuan together.

They apparently eat a lot of tang yuan on this festival

A lot of romantic meet-ups happen on this festival (and the Mid-Autumn Festival) (y’all know what to do with this information)

This is considered the last chance of family time following on from CNY before you all return to your normal lives

The QingMing Festival (*) - Early Apr

AKA the Tomb-Sweeping Festival

To put it very basically, this is when we go to our deceased loved one’s graves and clean said graves 

We go to the cemetery in the early morning, wipe down the gravestones, clear them of debris like leaves and such, then we make offerings of food. A lot of the times, we would basically lay out a feast before the grave(s), lighting incense and also decorating the graves with flowers and such

Please do not ever eat anything in those offerings. It’s not for the living. Therefore, please feel free to stab your chopsticks upright into that bowl of rice.

You can burn offerings like paper too, usually in a burning urn (??? is it an urn?), but in my experience we weren’t allowed to do that at my grandma’s grave since it was a crowded cemetery so I don’t know how it works exactly

In my personal experiences, we usually stayed in the cemetery for about an hour, praying to the deceased and sort of chatting with them, hoping they’re doing well in the afterlife and updating them on our lives

After that’s done, we go have a picnic somewhere down the mountain and fly kites while getting bullied by asshole magpies

They keep stealing my food because apparently even they know you shouldn’t eat the food left out for the dead

One stole my necklace once ;-;

Anyways the food offerings left out are typically cleared the next morning (latest) by us or you pay the cemetery caretakers to dispose of it, but the latter is looked down upon for good reason

It’s really just best to clean it up yourselves when you can. For everyone’s sake.

The Dragon Boat Festival (*) - Late Jun to Early Jul

You could probably make a sports anime about this festival, because the main even at the Dragon Boat Festival is the dragon boat racing (shocking)

Okay all joking aside, during this festival, which is a summer event, dragon boat racers compete with one another in long, narrow wooden canoes with a Chinese dragon head carved out in the front and painted scales on the side, often really brightly coloured

They row to the beat of loud drums, with a drummer sitting at the head of each boat, facing their boat’s rowers, beating the drum as their team rows

People watching the races can do so from the shore, where they’ll be eating glutinous rice with meat/nuts/beans wrapped in large, woven bamboo leaves into a triangle shape, called 粽子 - zòng zi.  (The Malaysians & Indonesians have this too, but they use banana leaves instead)

In some places, you have viewers in viewing boats too, with the race course marked off with buoys. I fell into the water once from one of these. Luckily they make you all wear life-vests. 

Also a limited occurrence but rarer, some places will have sort of official “cheerleading” boats, in which a bunch of colourfully dressed people will shout and cheer for the racers as a whole, often waving flags the same colours as their clothes. They’re often standing, but in the same kind of dragon boats. You have to be affiliated with the local dragon boat community / heritage board to be allowed to be one of these “cheerleaders” though

When the official races aren’t happening though, visitors are often taken around the river. You can technically do this at any time, but the Chinese believe that the time of the Dragon Boat Festival is the best time for traversing the great rivers

Other things people do during this festival include drinking realgar wine, making perfume packets for children, and hanging mosquito-repellent herbs on doors and windows, but I’ve never seen this in practice and couldn’t find much else on these

To be honest, this particular festival is seen as a thing of lingering cultural heritage or just something of a traditional ceremonial practice, but is overall kinda dying as a full-fledged festival, with only the racing surviving the passage of time (In fact, this has become more of a leisure event than a festival in Singapore in recent years)

The QiXi Festival - Mid to Late Aug???

Not gonna lie I didn’t know this one existed until I looked it up

I knew the legend surrounding it (The Cowherd and the Weaver Girl - Please look it up it’s a beautiful story even though it’s not realistic because the magpies aren’t assholes) but didn’t know it was an actual holiday at all

Basically it’s kind of the Chinese version of Valentine’s Day, but it takes place in like August

Traditionally, girls took this time to show off their skills in the “feminine arts” such as weaving, sewing, fruit carving (???), tea-making (?????) and poetry (?????????). I’m confused.

They also ate special pastries and children gave flower garlands to the sacred ox statues

Apparently it’s mostly only celebrated in more traditional/rural areas now because most modern Chinese people just celebrate the Western Valentine’s Day

The legend gets to stay though

The Hungry Ghost Festival (*) - Late Jul to Early Aug (Start) / Late Aug to Early Sept (End)

This one is not a festive festival at all. You shouldn’t be enjoying this festival as a living person. But this is probably the best festival for any fics set in the modern world revolving around dead spirits being active out of everything on this list

This festival lasts the entire 7th month of the lunar calendar, so the Chinese will literally just call it the “Seventh Month (七月 - qī yuè)” or the “Ghost Month (鬼月 - guǐ yuè)” 

I’ve never even heard anyone refer to it by its full name in Chinese, which is apparently 中元节 - zhōng yuán jié or 盂兰盆节 - yú lán pén jié according to Wikipedia

Basically, the Gates of Hell the Afterlife have opened for the month to get the spirits of the deceased ease their suffering for a bit. So, the festival is actually NOT celebrated by the living, instead, it’s “celebrated” by the ghosts of the deceased

Living human practices during this festival include making various food offerings (the main point of the festival) for the spirits, usually much more seriously and/or extravagantly than typical offerings, burning offerings such as paper money, paper houses, paper cars, etc in large quantities because this is the best time for the spirits to receive them, putting on special “performances for the dead” in which performers will dance and sing to a room of empty chairs, and having special family prayer sessions in which we “speak” to the deceased directly (Luckily, they don’t usually answer us)

Nowadays, only the first two of those practices are really still practiced as seriously as they used to be, for individual families at least

Again, if you see food being left out on the side of the street, especially if there’s incense or something next to it, please don’t eat it or even touch it. Don’t be the ignorant guy in a horror movie

People who can see/hear/sense spirits and environmentalists hate this festival, because ghosts can be terrifying even when harmless, and all the burning contributes to climate change

I happen to be both of those. I am also sensitive to smoke. So...

Ironically I don’t actually hate this festival THAT much but...

Personal note: I’ve never been to China during the seventh month, and because they make it a point to not really talk about it, I only know the Singaporean experiences. Telling ghost stories is both encouraged and shunned during this month here. Malaysian-Chinese ghost stories are fucking horrifying. Give me more.

Mid-Autumn Festival (*) - Late Sept to Early Oct

My personal favourite festival on this list. I don’t like crowded places, but I make exceptions for this one when I can. I would call this the most fun and enjoyable festival out of all of them. 

When speaking Chinese, most of the time we’d just shorten it to 秋节 - qiū jié from the full name of 中秋节 - zhōng qiū jié 

When speaking English (in Singapore, but you can use these in English fics and people tend to understand it fine), we also call it the Mooncake Festival, the Autumn Moon Festival, or the Harvest Moon Festival (this one is quite an old name though)

In modern times, this is celebrated very similarly to the famous Natsu Matsuri (Summer Festival) in Japan, in which a huge festival site is fully decorated in colourful lanterns and filled with countless stalls of food, games, and festival products such as more lanterns, traditional dress rentals if you’re lucky, wooden toys, cloth products, “festival” tea & wine, and many more

You are encouraged to wear cheongsam/qipao to the festivities, but honestly most people don’t anymore, but they dress their kids in cultural clothing a lot (in Singapore you’ll also see kiddies running around in other traditional dress, such as yukata, summer hanbok, festive baju kurung, etc.)

In some places, special dragon or lion dances will be performing

Expect to find a FUCKTON of fresh fruit stalls, including pumpkins, melons, pomelos, persimmons, pomegranates, maybe starfruits, dragonfruits & guavas, and probably a heck lot of longans if you’re somewhere in South China. Also expect every individual large fruit to be decorated with red ribbons and colourful wrapping paper

Also out of every five stalls, at least one will be a mooncake stall

Mooncakes come in multiple varieties! The most common are the white lotus bean paste ones, the ones with salted egg yolks (single yolk and double yolk), snowskin ones which as much softer and sweeter, red bean paste cakes, etc.

They make some super cute shapes too!

There are even more savoury options with minced pork filling or prawn/fish filling (not a fan of the fish ones), but they’re made with a flakier pastry than the sweet ones (Note: sometimes we don’t call these mooncakes, but it depends)

Basically the sweet ones use a pastry that’s more like a typical sweet tart shell while the savoury ones use something that’s more like a non-sweetened croissant 

Traditionally, people would make the mooncakes together at home, and offer them to the moon goddess during moon worship, but nowadays most people just buy them and eat them

This festival also shares a lot of the same customs as CNY & the Lantern Festival, such as: 

Having another reunion dinner. Duck is a very common dish, along with seasonal crops. Lotus dishes are also popular around this time, depending on where you are. 

Lanterns everywhere. Water and sky lanterns are also common. You’ll also see people playing with firecrackers and sparklers.

In much more rural areas, you might get to experience the Burning Pagoda tradition, in which they set up a seven-tier tower made up of wood and straw and burn it while dancing around it. This practice is similar to the Bon Odori even in Japan. 

Fun fact: This is also basically the Lantern Festival of Singapore, because the actual Lantern Festival isn’t celebrated here

Bonus: I made a post about the most famous myth of this festival that relates to MDZS.

The ChongYang Festival - Mid to Late Oct

Also known as the Double Ninth Festival (in English) and the Senior Festival (slang)

This is basically the festival of paying respects to our elders, both living and dead

There are...going to be a fuckton of chrysanthemums everywhere. Chrysanthemum flowers decorating the place, chrysanthemum cakes (I don’t recommend googling it if you have severe trypophobia, some of the more traditional cakes have a lot of seeds and stuff on top which may be upsetting, but I would say it’s at least better than a hollow lotus pod), chrysanthemum wine, all of that

Common activities include going on easy hikes or mountain walks with the living elders, and maybe visiting the graves of those who have passed and paying respects

It’s dying in modern times, but still seen as at least a day of relaxing with your elderly family and friends

The DongZhi Festival - Late Dec (just before Christmas mostly)

The Winter Solstice Festival

Nothing much is done, we really mostly just have a special dinner together, eating dumplings, noodle soup, mutton, and hotpot. Alcohol is often present at such dinners, and you would toast to the solstice 

You’d also pray and stuff like most of these festivals, but I think that’s a given by now lol

Modern Chinese people will often get together during this time and merge it with their Christmas dinners

Aside from that, we really just celebrate Christmas, though now you can add a line of cultural significance to those modern AU Christmas fics :3

Bonus Info: There is also a Summer Solstice festival called the Xia Zhi Festival that’s essentially the same as this, except you eat a lot of noodles and go swimming, but it’s not really significant anymore in modern times, the DongZhi festival only really surviving because of Christmas, so I didn’t include it in the list

Alright, that one took like 84 years. I’m tired LMAO. 

#mdzs #mo dao zu shi #cql #chen qing ling #the untamed #chinese things #chinese fic tips #fic tips #modern au #my posts

[buteojamaicensis]

(5-15-20, 2:30 AM)

Dear John,

I don’t think you ever really met Gus. I’m not sure you were ever alive at the same time. He was Grandma and Popop’s dog, a yellow lab, and he was euthanized when I was in elementary school.

He was a good dog. Every dog is a good dog, I know, but I still want to say it. Sometimes I’d be sitting in a chair, my little feet far off the ground, and he ’d come lay his head on my knees, all soft and golden. And he’d look at me with these big brown eyes, and I’d think that if anyone understood me, it was him.

You had a sister, almost, once upon a time. Before you, and before your brother, your mom was pregnant. She miscarried, and when your brother came out he was a big brother instead of a little one. We never got to meet her, and I don’t know what she would have been like, but I do know she would have loved you.

Grandma died six years ago, and usually I think I’m all healed up, but sometimes I’ll be baking cookies and it’s like she’s right next to me, telling me not to get too close to the oven. And sometimes I’ll wish I had Gus to lie down on the porch with. And every time I spend another Easter or Thanksgiving outside in the cold because it’s easier than trying to make myself heard, I wonder what it would be like if there was another girl there, two years younger than me.

The day Gus was scheduled to be put down, I sat on the ground with him and told him that it would be okay, and I’d miss him, but he wasn’t going to hurt anymore and it was okay if he was scared. He understood, I think.

I’m writing this when you’re eleven years old, turning twelve in five days. You’re in the sixth grade, but you’re learning at home right now because all the schools are closed. In the past week or so you’ve been to the emergency room twice, but your dad says you’re doing a little better.

I don’t know how much you know about Muscular Dystrophy when it comes to your life expectancy. I don’t know much either, but as far as I can tell you’re going to die long before me, maybe before even your parents do.

The point of this letter, I guess, is what I told Gus. I’ll miss you when you go, but you won’t be hurting, and it’s okay to be scared.

We don’t always get along, especially recently, as you found out back in December that I’m queer. You’re convinced I’m living in sin and going against god. Very strong opinions coming from a literal child, but I think you’re mostly just repeating what your parents say.

Despite this, I’m so glad I’ve done eleven years of growing alongside you. I like your hugs and I remember when you were little and so excited to show me your elevator, and we rode up and down even though we didn’t actually want to go anywhere. For about a year I called you the Swedish Radish for reasons I don’t remember, but I do remember we thought it was hilarious.

Until you were eight you thought we’d get married someday. I didn’t know how to tell you it was illegal. I guess you figured it out eventually. I hope it didn’t break your little heart too badly.

I hope a lot of things. I hope you feel a little better soon, because your parents are worried sick. I hope the schools reopen this fall so you can go to middle school. I hope however long it is, you have the performing career of your dreams, and I hope you become somebody you’re proud of, and I hope you get over your dumb homophobia thing because it’s really tearing us apart, dude.

I hope wherever you go after this, it’s nice. I hope Gus and your almost-sister and Grandma are there. I hope there’s a swimming pool. I hope your back doesn’t hurt anymore, and that there will be a less invasive way to eat than a plastic tube through your stomach lining.

I hope I’ll feel you next to me every time I sing.

See you on the other side of quarantine.

Love,

Your favorite cousin

#what is UP i am AFRAID the people i love will DIE before i get a chance to SEE THEM AGAIN #I was asleep but then i WOKE UP #THAT’S ANXIETY BABES #names have been changed to protect the innocent blah blah #anyway uhhh tell the people you love you love them? #mine #angsty on main #death cw #death tw

[hissprince]

Writing Ask Games

tagged by @ink-nguyen and I immediately forgot about it

I’m doing this for Coat of Scales 

1. Describe the plot in one sentence.

Elion Veris is a prince forced into exile by his Regent, and he’s not buff enough to take it back by force, so he has to figure out how to talk his way in--and out--of every possible political nightmare scenario.

2. Pick one sight, smell, sound, feel, and taste to describe the aesthetic of your novel.

a silver crown perched on swathes of black and purple velvet

the smell of a forest during a rainstorm

a grandmother singing Slavic lullabies to her grandchild, underscored by the crackle of a fire

being wrapped in a blanket and held in the arms of someone you love

turkish coffee and warm honey-bread

3. Which 3+ songs would make up a playlist for the novel?

Run Boy Run - Woodkid

Stay Frosty, Royal Milk Tea - Fall Out Boy

Two Evils - Bastille

4. What’s the time period and location in which the novel takes place.

I never stuck an exact pin in it, but I’d estimate vaguely 1600s-1700s? I don’t know man I had to make my own calendar system. as far as location goes, the main settings are Apres, Sidra, Krey, and Fille. Apres is sort of Hellenic in feeling and aesthetic, with a heavy emphasis on sea trade and travel. Sidra is very Persian with a bit of Mughal Indian influence. Krey and Fille are inspired by Eastern Europe, especially Russia and Ukraine, although Krey has a distinctly Celtic flavor to some of its customs. 

5. Is this a standalone or a part in a series?

it’s the first in the Kingsnake Trilogy which I’m probably going to have to work on for Many Years

6. Are there any former titles you’ve considered but discarded?

Coat of Scales was actually the original title, but I briefly switched it to something else before deciding I didn’t like it as much LMAO. also, the original file name was “fantasy costco” so there’s that.

7. What’s the first line of your novel?

‘Elion Veris jolted up in bed, his book falling to the floor with a loud thump.’

8. What’s a dialogue you’re particularly proud of?

I actually like a lot of my dialogue tbh so you get Several

Chapter 2:

“Now, now, you may not be particularly handsome, but there’s no need for insult—ow!” Simon yelped as Elion struck him squarely in the forehead with an apricot.

“There are plenty more,” Elion said, tossing an apricot from one hand to the other. “Choose your next words carefully. I see one that’s definitely overripe.”

Simon pursed his lips. “I love you, Elion?”

“No,” Elion deadpanned, punctuated by the distinct sound of splattering fruit and an indignant screech. “Choose more carefully next time.”

Chapter 11

Either he was lucky, or Saturn noticed his discomfort. “You weren’t here earlier, when I came back from the barracks. Where’d you run off to?”

“Janus and Tethys wanted to talk to me.” It was only half a lie. “They told me you have quite the reputation.”

Saturn groaned. “Of course they did. Look, it was years ago. I was young and I was stupid. It was a temporary thing, I’m not—like that anymore.”

“Could have fooled me.”

“You think me a whore?” Saturn said, mocking offense. “Shame on you! I’m a reformed whore!”

“Re-whore-med, then, is it?” Elion replied. Saturn threw a piece of radish at him.

“You’re not funny,” Saturn huffed, but his tightly-pursed lips said otherwise. There was a warmth in his eyes that had been missing before. Elion was almost bold enough to call it trust.

Chapter 14: (wow a sneak peek)

"You’re not going to do it, are you?” she said in Fillesian. 

“What do you mean?”

“Kill Saturn.” Phyrra’s voice was emotionless. “You’re not going to do it.”

Elion narrowed his eyes. When he responded, it was in Apresian. “Why would you think that?”

“You’re becoming fond of him.”

“I have not.” He switched to Fillesian. “He touches me constantly. I hate it.”

“But you don’t panic when he does it.”

“You don’t know that!” Elion snapped, his voice turning into a sharp hiss. “You think I can lose control every time I’m afraid? You think I can get away with that? I’m not putting myself at risk by fighting back!”

For once,  Phyrra hesitated. She dropped her gaze to the floor, breathing out slowly as her shoulders relaxed. “Oh, Elion,” she sighed. “They’ve made you into something terrible.”

9. Which line from the novel most represents it as a whole?

“He took everything from me,” Elion spat, the words like venom on his tongue. “Everything I had, and everyone I loved. He killed my mother and Mana and left Simon to bleed out like a dog in the public square, and he looked me in the eyes and laughed.” His body trembled, but his voice was steady, and he stared Jastra down with iron in his mouth. “This was never about the kingdom.”

10. Who are your character faceclaims?

I’m going to be completely honest, the only faceclaim I could find for Elion is Keira Knightley. Saturn and Phyrra are borderline impossible to pin down so I haven’t found anyone for them yet. Janus is definitely Adonis Bosso, and Tethys is a young Riz Ahmed.

11. Sort your characters into Harry Potter houses!

Elion - Slytherin

Saturn - Gryffindor

Phyrra - Ravenclaw

Tethys - Hufflepuff

Janus - Ravenclaw

Simon - Hufflepuff

12. Which character’s name do you like the most?

Elion is a personal fave but I’m a huge fan of Saturn, Janus, and Tethys bc all the Vaerion are named after the planet Saturn’s moons. look how clever I am.

13. Describe each character’s daily outfit.

Elion - white linen shirts with intricate botanical embroidery around the neck and cuffs, a vest in either dark purple or black with silver embroidery around the collar, a jacket in colors and embroidery patterns to coordinate with the vest, and either a long black and silver coat for court functions or a black cloak. tight black riding pants and tall black boots. a goth icon.

Saturn - in the summer, usually a white chiton with red embroidery on the hem, his cloak, and sandals. the rest of the year, loose dark linen pants and a light cotton shirt in various shades of red or ivory-white, plus low leather boots. he wears his leather armor if he’s needed at the barracks. he has to be forced to wear shirts.

Phyrra - while in Apres, she wears long chitons with blue floral embroidery and a ton of bracelets. she actually goes barefoot whenever possible, but she’ll wear either sandals or embroidered slippers if she has to.

Janus and Tethys - dark linen pants and various shades of cotton shirts, with dark wool cloaks and mid-length leather boots. they share literally their entire wardrobe so I count them as one fashion entity. 

14. Do any characters have distinctive birthmarks/scars?

Elion has some scarring on his lower back, and the veins in his arms have a silver tint which I’m counting as a birthmark. Saturn has a scar across his lips that he earned in a knife fight when he was 14. 

15. Which character most fits a character trope?

Simon has a very “best friend and sidekick” sort of aura, but there’s a lot more going on with him than just that

16. Which character is the best writer? Worst?

Elion is a fantastic writer, since he realized from a young age that he’d need to be good with words to keep himself at the top of the pack, but Saturn is an incredibly close second—after all, he’s a poet. Simon is The Worst without question or competition.

17. Which character is the best liar? Worst?

Elion is definitely the best, since he’s had 19 years of practice. Saturn is the worst liar; his expression always gives him away bc he feels guilty about it.

18. Which character swears the most? Least?

I think so far Elion is actually the one who swears the most by stats, but in terms of Big Swear Energy it’s probably Janus. Jastra swears the least because she’s the Empress and she has a hell of a reputation to uphold, but I don’t think Simon has sworn at all. #letSimonsayfuck

19. Which character has the best handwriting? Worst?

Tethys has gorgeous handwriting, even if he doesn’t do a whole lot of writing most of the time. the prize for worst is tied between Janus and Phyrra; Janus bc he’s a doctor and it’s become illegible over time, and Phyrra just because she does not fucking care

20. Which character is most like you? Least like you?

I’m probably most like Elion and Phyrra tbh. Elion, because I’m very politically-minded and prefer to do things in underhanded ways, and Phyrra because I take no shit and tend to be more knife than person. I’m definitely the least like Janus because he has his shit together and I do Not.

21. Which character would you most like to be?

probably the king of Krey bc he has a castle and like 8 dogs and a really cool spouse and comparatively fewer past traumas 

I tag @poetatertot @satyr-syd and any of my other writer friends who want in on this!! if you don’t it’s cool bc this deadass took me over an hour LMAO

#tag meme #writing meme

[doberbutts]

kaoticspoonie replied to your post “kaoticspoonie replied to your post “kaoticspoonie replied to your...”

I got diagnosed with my meat and shellfish allergies a few months after going vegan so it was more of a 'huh that's why going vegan made me feel better' instead of being sad about not being able to eat them. Disliking the foods could be Conditioned food aversion. Most of the time I've heard it talked about is in regards to food posioning, but I think the term still applies to allergies

According to my mother, we knew most of my allergies during weaning, because most of my family is not allergic to most of the things I’m allergic to, so when they fed me the food they typically eat, I would have some pretty dramatic reactions. Of course, I was a baby, so I don’t remember any of that, but it is an interesting theory that perhaps these foods that I hate are from a bad first impression.

Let’s see...

>all fruit is bad, but Very Bad Fruits are berries, cherries, grapes, and citrus fruits.

>anything that’s not a specifically green vegetable is guaranteed to make me cough at least. whether you include tomatoes, squash, gourds, peppers, etc as “vegetable” or “fruits”- they are bad no matter what. I don’t know why only green colored veggies are okay but whatever I guess.

>dairy??? so I’ve been tested as Not Lactose Intolerant and yet dairy very much Kicks My Ass and lactaid sometimes doesn’t work so I’ve been told by doctors to just... call myself lactose intolerant. this is one that developed later in life though I always had a weird digestive reaction to milk- I was not formally told to call myself lactose intolerant until I was in my 20s but was tested many times for it because of my reactions since I was 5 or 6.

>shellfish is Very Bad And Will Actually Kill Me, but regular fish is fine

>corn is bad. soy is bad. gluten we thought might be bad but turns out that’s just fine go figure. mushrooms are bad. nuts/seeds are fine but I don’t digest them unless they are in butter form? like literally they come out the same shape they went in, even if they’re chewed very much, so they rip up my intestines which is bad.

>chocolate and anything similar is bad

>so idk if I’m allergic to caffeine but between ADD and POTS and MCAS I have always had a very terrible reaction to it and so nothing with caffeine in it at all ever

>caramel coloring- which is in things like dark sodas (Pepsi, Root Beer, etc), imitation vanilla or molasses, etc. Also cannot have actual caramel? Same reaction? Dunno why?

>whatever that artificial sweetener is in McDonald’s ice cream, sorbitol maybe? man that kicks my ass. anything with those sorts of artificial sweeteners are not nice to my stomach which doesn’t bode well for me, because if they’re not using those sweeteners they’re probably using corn syrup which is... still bad... and then if they’re actually using real cane sugar then there’s a whole cartel and black market and illegal activity and such involved with that and... there’s no winning, is there?

Things I eat anyway even though they’re Kinda Bad For Me include:

>apples, bananas, sometimes watermelon- because I’m afraid of scurvy

>carrots, potatoes (fun fact: eating too many french fries make my tongue numb), radish, cauliflower (I assume that’s bc broccoli is safe and it’s The Same Damn Plant But Specialized), pumpkin

>things with corn or soy in them because I’ve given up trying to avoid them at severe cost to my wallet but I do try to avoid straight up corn or soy, just if they’re down further on ingredient lists I’ll grit and bear it

>dairy because fuck you cheese and ice cream and butter are delicious and I really miss simple things like eating a bowl of cereal for breakfast or being able to spur-of-the-moment go get ice cream without worrying about the fallout from not having my lactaid on me at that given moment and playing Medicine Roulette of will it work today or will I be stuck in the bathroom for 6 hours again

>sometimes I just wanna munch on sunflower seeds and then I will cry the next day when they exit my system completely undigested

so... as said, my diet is meat, and grains, and little else. Sometimes I sneak other planty things in there that I really shouldn’t be eating but do anyway. I take a daily multivitamin because otherwise I’m afraid of scurvy and other deficiencies that happen when you completely cut two (and a half) major food groups out of your already-limited diet.

Anything not on the “I eat this anyway” list? Tastes bad to me. Honestly all of those things either taste bland, bitter, or like... rotten food? Some of them even set off a gag reflex. But most of those things are things that other people love eating, and I just don’t understand why they don’t taste good to me. Did I learn to hate it from a young age because eating them actively hurt me? Is it conditioning from being told they’ll make me sick? Are they “acquired tastes” aka “food that everyone knows tastes bad but pretends it doesn’t”? I dunno.

#kaoticspoonie #replies #text post #for a long time I really wanted to be vegan #but I can't #I just can't #look at all the foods that I can't eat and tell me that I could be vegan easily and cheaply #and I'll call you a liar #so instead I'm like #a weird cast-off paleo diet lol

[sanoiro]

Lucifer 3x20 - Meta and Speculation - The Love, the Mark and the Deckerstar

Part 1 - The Love

This episode was really hard to watch with all that Marclo sex but it also gave us a lot of insight into certain things. 

First, let’s go back to episode 1x04 - Manly Whatnots. Last night I revisited that episode down in memory lane with @caesarmidnight.

Lucifer in 1x04 planned to have sex with Chloe but during the episode not only he didn't succeed but ended up being shot by her and bled much to his horror. 

We had assumed that the standalone 3x06 in Vegas was just a sweet episode especially with the bullet necklace but apparently we were wrong as EVERYTHING is connected. Before I go too far with this I would like to remind you that in 3x20 Lucifer mistakes the actor as the murder because he played one in the tv Series Bones, episode 306 The Intern in the Incinerator. 

The episode of Bones gave away many hints like the following, taken now due to a shortage of time from this blog: 

1) Felicia says, "Why did you guys break up? What did he do?" On her way out. An innocent Booth talks to himself, saying: "It wasn't me."

2) Booth:  "Because you were betrayed by one of your own." Bones: "yes, are you going to betray me?"  But in answer to her question about whether he will betray her: He lifts his cup and says, "no."  Bones  takes the liquor and says, "Nonetheless, I will be vigilant." 

So as you can see there is a lot of backstory here. 

Moving on! Now let’s say that the writers did not only nodded to Bones and the plot of that particular episode but also to the 3x06 episode of this season Vegas WIth Some Radish, the important messages we got there as well as the importance of the bullet and of course the episode 1x04. 

Back to episode 1x04, I remind you the hilarious exchange of the: Chloe: I need you- Lucifer: See you need me Chloe: The Department needs you because you are the one Lucifer Oh I’m the one! Chloe: on the list for the player thing. 

But that’s just the light stuff the most important things which we discussed with @caesarmidnight. was why Lucifer became vulnerable to her in 1x04? Well for the ones who do not know although I have said it many times, the episode 1x04 was written as the episode 1x03 but as the showrunners felt Lucifer was becoming vulnerable too fast they moved the episode 1x10 - The Would Be the Prince of Darkness as 1x03 and made some changes to fit the storyline.  So now you know... Lucifer was supposed to be vulnerable way too fast in just 3 episodes (four are good as well) but it took Marcus 20 episodes?

Some say that often we mistake love with sex. Chloe finally got some sex and closeness so it’s would not be surprising if she had feelings of closeness but no real love as she had for Lucifer. But you will say was Chloe in love with Lucifer in 1x04? Heck was Lucifer? The answer is no. There was more. 

In 1x04 Lucifer bares himself before her like naken and emotionally in the car but both counts. The first because Chloe realises that Lucifer is a man with a lot of issues and perhaps starts to respect him in a way. WHoever got through that torture has her sympathy. In the car though everything changes. 

In the car, Lucifer asks her seriously if Chloe fears him to which as you remember she looks at him carefully almost horrified by the question and she says No. At that moment Lucifer has her verbal, emotional and soulful Trust. She might be attracted to him for sure but there is something more there. 

Chloe trusted Lucifer enough to shot him, that’s no joke. But as she started to love him the radius of his vulnerability started to expand as we saw in 2x12. In my theory, it’s Chloe’s feelings that make someone vulnerable or in Marcus’ case killable. The reason is that they have to be neutralised for her to not be hurt. 

So does that mean that Marcus and Lucifer’s feelings mean nothing? Well in Marcus case there is a mutual respect but with Lucifer, it's like coals that never go out. Never trust coals by the way. 

And a final note from 1x04. When Chloe returns home Trixie tells her Mummy that if she shot him she must really like him... Are you thinking what I’m thinking?

Yes, you see the relationship and mutual love between Lucifer and Chloe works because there is trust, respect and both ends are ready to forgive everything no matter how grave. In 3x20, Chloe demanded Lucifer to talk to her, she was worried but also lost in her bliss. You see when we are lonely and attention is given to us we tend to be mistaken about the feeling of comfort and actual deep feelings like the one of love. 

Part 2 - The Mark

In episode 3x20, Marcus mark disappeared and we got to see Lucifer’s eyes blaze amber again. Sometimes I wonder if Lucifer’s eyes become red because of Chloe. I’m confident that there is something behind his Devil face but not his lightbringing power per se. He still has that it’s something deeper than that. Both times his eyes flashed red he was furious that the one he cared or loved was manipulated. It was a flame gleaming by his very soul and not his work as the Devil. 

So let’s move on to the infamous Mark of Cain. It’s gone but is it really? Imagine this... If the Mark is gone Marcus would have called Maze by 3x21 and she would have killed him. Of course the mark might reappear in the next episode, it might not have left at all and of course, Marcus plan might not have been losing the Mark and dying. 

Let’s review this from the start. 

Marcus has sex with Chloe in order for her to become more emotionally attached to him. It worked and then talked to Ella. Ella said that when Chloe says the magic words everything will change to what he says that he is counting on that. (I’m not going to discuss the rock part...)

Some may say that Marcus had a change of heart as he knows loves her and although it is true that the writers turned the tables on us with Amenadiel and Mum, Cain is a different story.  

Some things once more do not add up. Maze tells him that Chloe will be a wreck and although we see him thinking about it he is clear that he doesn’t care who he has to hurt but then why did he flee from her apartment?

Chloe says: I really like spending up time with you to which he seems perplexed and before she tells him she loves him, Marcus stops her.  Marcus: I can’t do this Chloe:..-Sometimes you have to take a leap of faith Marcus: You’re just making this too hard, It’s not worth it.

The majority of the audience has understood that Cain is now in love with Chloe and that he stopped her in order to not hurt her. I don’t buy it. Remember that Maze has a huge fight with Marcus at the end of the season as does Lucifer. 

There is a very eerie scene at the paper factory that has me wondering what will happen. Also, why would Charlotte be killed? Why does Marcus has illegal dealings or was it the ring in Chinatown? What also bothers me is that I can see two possibilities. 

One let’s say that Marcus is indeed in love and dies protecting Chloe. Doubtful. 

Two  Marcus tries to kill Lucifer at the Finale while he is close to Chloe at that circular room with the Roman status, the bullets and the feather. Now we are talking... 

Moving on again let’s go to the very last scene where Lucifer gets at  Marcus’ house. I still have this weird feeling that Marcus might have concealed the Mark in order to send Lucifer away who might believe that his antagonist with either die soon so problem solved or later on force Lucifer into reluctantly backing down when he asks Chloe to marry him for his own devices.  

In any case, by removing the mark with let’s say makeup, Lucifer is sure to step back and wait but that move might make him lose the game and of course Chloe something that Marcus is counting on. You don't just send the cat to a crazy adventure, you distract her enough for the cat to believe you are friendly enough, let you approach it and then choke it to death. Do not forget Sinnerman. Ever. I mean it, do not forget the mouse in the trap!. Or Lucifer in the fridge...  Finally, I remind you the first part of my meta and speculation post about the case. See the similarities between Jeremy and Marcus... His last words on how he was a good actor to make that woman fall for him and how he used her. 

Part 3 - Final - The Deckerstar

What is left to say here in this episode full of pain and agony? A lot.

As many of you have noticed the song used for the final scene of 3x20 was teh same (albeit a different cover) with the one of 2x10. In the AIr tonight. That song may be used to signify Chloe’s miracle status as she has removed Marcus scar but also something more... In both times Chloe was left emotionally crushed,

But there is more.... Following I have the lyrics between the two episodes under the scenes they were features.  “Well if you told me you were drowning”   

3x20 - Marcus Leaves Chloe’s house 

2x10 - Lucifer and Chloe talk about getting reservations at Lucifer’s penthouse and share one of their first moments of mutual flirtation and affection. 

“I would not lend a hand, I’ve seen your face before my friend”  3x20 - Marcus in anger and hits his helmet while sitting on the stairs, Lucifer drives the Corvette in agony

2x10 - Mum tells Amenadiel that Chloe is not an obstacle but a way for Amenadiel to get back his wings. To get back everything. 

“But I don't know if you know who I am”

3x20 - Lucifer drives and finally arrives at Chloe door which he knocks repeatedly

2x10 - Lucifer says “Detective what you said today in the courtroom” Chloe interrupts him and says that it was the truth.  

Now the songs change:

3x20 - Well I was there and I saw what you did, I saw it with my own two eyes

3x20 - Trixie solemnly opens the door and Lucifer sees Chloe emotionally broken and unresponsive. 

2x10 - “I can feel it coming in the air tonight, oh Lord”

2x10 - Chloe gives her hane to Lucifer who plays tenderly with her fingers. 

3x20 - “So you can wipe off that grin, I know where you've been It's all been a pack of lies” 3x20 - Lucifer stares at Chloe and she does not even notice he is there.  So Lucifer nods to himself and leaves. 

2x10 - “Well I've been waiting for this moment for all my life, oh Lord”

Mum says to Amenadiel that they are going home and that Chloe is the key

Same lyrics again:

3x20 - “I can feel it coming in the air tonight, oh Lord”

Lucifer drives in the hideaway towards Marcus house. 

2x10 - “I can feel it coming in the air tonight, oh Lord”

Lucifer and Chloe come closer and almost kiss before the credits roll

3x20 - “Well I've been waiting for this moment for all my life, oh Lord”

Lucifer gets to Marcus house and breaks the window 

3x20 - “Can you feel it coming in the air tonight, oh Lord, oh Lord”

Lucifer - gets into the house and hits demanding to know why he hurt Chloe. 

3x20 - “Oh lord, oh lord *instrumental*  Can you feel it coming in the air tonight, oh Lord, oh Lord”

Lucifer and Marcus talk and after Lucifer hits him again, he notices that Marcus’ mark is gone. 

So what is the big difference I see between the scenes? Obviously the fact that both Mum (for the first time in 2x10) and Marcus (in the past episodes) called her a key. Is no accident.  

We can also say that the  “Well I've been waiting for this moment for all my life, oh Lord” in the case of Cain is for him to be killable but that foresees the final scene and not an actual fact for now. 

Also between the two scenes, we don’t have romances in both cases. In 2x10 we have a tentatively blossoming love but the plant is still there even now waiting to blossom again. In 3x20 we have way too much fertiliser, no real flower but the illusion of one. The spring does not create the seeds but gives them an opportunity to grow. In this case, Marcus has no seed to grow just a lot of BS. 

Finally, I remind you that 2x10 in a way started the story that ended in 2x13 and Chloe almost dying so who will be dying this time? Chloe or Lucifer? I believe it’s Chloe’s time once more hopefully by protecting Lucifer or at least really endangering her life for Lucifer. 

So it’s funny really how much this episode of Marclo sex and Chloe saying I love you is at heart a Deckerstar episode.

Do not forget that Marcus forced a relationship under false pretences. Lucifer was always open as to who he was, what he was and his only deceit was when he left her in order to protect her. 

So here is the main difference between Lucifer and Marcus. Marcus is a mask that sooner or later will drop and not a good man. Chloe’s feelings are misguided and that person does not actually exist. 

Lucifer, on the other hand, was always open to who he was as a man and besides his faults and perhaps even with his faults, Chloe fell in love with him. He has no mask to drop only one to wear and that’s the Devil’s. The Devil most believe it’s his true identity, but it’s but a mask that hides behind it a scared boy that puts a brave face of red and black hoping that inflicting fear will protect him... 

That’s all I have to say for tonight... I might have forgotten a few things but for now, that’s it. Thank you for reading this if you did and I hope you will have a great week ahead of you. :) 

Lucifer 3x20 - Meta and Speculation Post: The Case, The Figurine, King of the Centaurs and Charlotte & Amenadiel

#lucifer season 3 #lucifer meta #lucifer speculation #Deckerstar #Marclo #lucifer 3x20 #The Angel of San Bernardino

[actuallylorelaigilmore]

the ultimate citation list for Schneider of ODAAT, volume 1

A reference collection of quotes and details, organized chronologically, for the first 26 episodes of One Day At A Time. Used to create this character guide.

“Can you believe it's only been 10 months since you moved in? I remember 'cause I got my five year sober chip and your mom baked me that cake. I enjoyed watching you guys eat it." 1x01

"You're 40 and you look stupid." “I'll have you know, I was invited to several Pride parades." 1x01

Uses a “very expensive” Damascus steel hammer. 1x01

"I've been doing some outreach down at the rec center, talking to at-risk youth. You guys wanna start takin' bets? Actually, scratch that. I'm addicted to gambling.” 1x01

"Love isn't even real. It's just something your nanny says sometimes to your dad." 1x02

"Hey, I may have money in the bank and two living parents, and four living stepmothers but there is a hole in here. We never had family meals. I ate alone in front of the TV. Oh, don't get me wrong. It was a massive TV. Sometimes my nanny would join me, but only if I agreed to watch telenovelas. This one time, Rosa got jealous of the housekeeper 'cause she was makin' a move on her man, so she threatened to throw live scorpions on her while she slept. Rosa was my nanny. Ex-nanny. Now, stepmother." 1x03

[Lydia and Pen fighting] “It's startin' to feel kinda like home in here.” 1x03

Schneider cooks fancy hipster food. "Nutted quinoa, wilted broccolini with radish micro-greens, and venison carpaccio on a bed of nettles. Grab a cedar plank and dig in." 1x04

"Always interesting to be the sober one at a dinner party." 1x05

"I immigrated here illegally. I'm a Canadian. But yeah, born in the 'Couve, overstayed my student visa, forced to live in the shadows of Pepperdine University. Anyway, it's fine now. My lawyers made it all okay." 1x05

Uses sheet masks, knows about chauffeurs, butlers, estates. 1x06

“The kids barely touched my black olive tapenade.” “Thanks for helping out, but maybe next time pick a food a kid would wanna eat or has heard of.” “Yeah, and maybe next time, don't hand out masks with my face on them.” 1x07  

"The members of my college band have finally put aside our differences and we're reuniting to play at the fair this afternoon. My band, Full Sail, plays yacht rock. These guys were like family. I used to show up at their dorm rooms unannounced and just hang out for hours and hours and hours." 1x07

"We were setting up for the show and our keytarist threw a decorative anchor at me. This is why Full Sail broke up in the first place. Too many passionate personalities." 1x07

Has a magnifying glass in his costume trunk. 1x07

"I know nothing about my grandparents and I never will. And they live in Pasadena!" (but he goes to 'the depot' in Pasadena) 1x09

"I have never seen such un-professionalism. This is why I don't work!" 1x09

"I need to find a new place to get my eyebrows threaded." 1x10

Has a safe. 1x10

"Well, Father believed it's best to have this kinda discussion in a car because you don't have to make eye contact. Plus, you're traveling in the same direction, which fosters intimacy. So we're in the Bentley with our chauffeur, Paco. Father said it's time to have the talk. We came to the next stoplight. He hopped out, Paco told me everything." 1x10

"I didn't get the period talk till I was 12. Paco just called it 'Shark Week.'" 1x10

"When I was a kid, there was an adult section in the back of the video store. Behind the beads. I'd always chicken out and just rent a Jane Fonda workout tape. Still worked. Still works." 1x10

"You'd be surprised how many of my hookups started with 'Ugh!' ...When I was 15, I told Father I wanted to be a professional tap dancer. He laughed. It was that lack of support that contributed to my drinking and drug problem. Oh, do you find that amusing? Because 15-year-old Schneider's drinking peach schnapps out of an unused tap shoe right now." 1x11

"You have a girl over here and you were offering to have sex with me?" - "Yes, Penelope. That's the kind of friend I am." 1x11

"My dad never came to my games. All he ever did was put me through rehab six times and buy me this building." 2x01

"Maroon 5 is the best." 2x01

"Okay, I decided to take a break from dating. See, I realized that women were just another one of my addictions, like alcohol, drugs, gambling, cigarettes, snow globes. The point is, I've broken the cycle of addiction with spinning. Five hours a day, every single day. I have to do it! Plus, it's the perfect substitute for dating, 'cause it burns a lot of energy and also numbs my junk!" 2x02

“Snow globes? Is this one of our family?” 2x02

"I come over, tell him to do stuff to me, he does it, I go home. You should get one." "I think what Nikki was kinda dancing around is that you don't always have to have a relationship with a capital "R." Sometimes all you need is what the great poets of the Renaissance called a junk buddy." "Exactly. You don't even have to like them." 2x03

"See, the great thing about having a green card is you get to live here without having to do all the stuff Americans have to, like vote or serve jury duty or become obese."

"Okay, but at least you vote in Canadian elections." "Mmm. No. Even in Canada, nothing ever changes. Clean air, sensible gun control, free health care. The system's rigged." 2x04

Can picture himself “doing it” with Elizabeth Warren, was Stephen Hawking for Halloween. 2x04

"You have to pay taxes with a green card? I just texted my accountant, and he said 'cause I'm in the highest income bracket, I don't have to pay taxes." 2x04

Keeps on hand: panic room, gas mask, water purification pills, MREs, enough cash to get to Cape Verde by boat. Followed Max on Instagram. Would be honored to be Penelope's maid of honor. 2x05

"I'm very patriotic. Look in that basket. There's a bald eagle thong." 2x06

All Elena's video game equipment belongs to him. 2x06

"Penelope, tell my third stepmother I loved her! Not the second one, though. She was kind of a jerk." 2x06

"Hummer limo's downstairs. My third stepmother used to take me to the racetrack to spy on Father. For the longest time, I thought she was saying, 'Your father is with Rebecca, that horse!' It's like I'm back at the racetrack with my stepmom. What's next? Throw a mint julep in his face?” 2x07

"I love Cuba! I've been there four times. Property manager, job's just temporary. My father owns the building. I'm really a musician. Play a lot of rap-rock-ska. I'm like a male Gwen Stefani. When you're hiring a nanny, make sure she's not too hot. That's how I met my fifth mom. I had four nannies and look at the results." 2x08

Did not speak a word of Spanish when he first met them, is interested in single moms. 2x08

"If you joined an adult kickball team after saying you were too busy to join mine, you are on a long road to forgiveness." 2x09

"Your idea of stress is when your chest-waxer goes out of town." "Roberto is the only one who doesn't make it sting!" 2x09

"I shouldn't have to need these either, but I do. To see. So it's Fourth of July, 2011. I'd been sober for a while, so I thought I'd celebrate with a beer. Woke up three days later in an alley. Then the bowling ball hit me. I was in the gutter for a long time. It's really slippery without the shoes. That was the day I truly accepted that I can't have alcohol or drugs, ever. Not a beer, not a glass of wine, not even six hits of acid at a Grateful Dead show, no matter how well it makes me dance. I kinda get where you're coming from. There's something I want that I can't have for the rest of my life." 2x09

He and Pen are best friends. Also considers Max his bestie. Wants to Netflix and chill with them both, together. 2x09

"My abuelita used to put Vicodin in her coffee. And her lemonade and her sandwiches. Maybe she had a problem. As my father said to me on my ninth birthday, 'You don't need me anymore.' I use my garage for pickling and sea horse breeding." 2x10

Loves puns. "This is Elena Alvarez, my handyman mentee. Or handy-manatee." "The toilet is a cruel mistress. She is flush with complications." 2x10

"Herb and Sherb McGurb. Her real name is Sheryl, but she gets a kick out of Sherb." 2x10

"Bonsai's for dorks. This is penjing. The gentle Chinese art of tray scenery. Now that you're working for me, I finally have some leisure time." "Oh, look, there's little people. Wait, is that my family?" "Could be any Cuban family." 2x10

"I may only look two or three years older than you, but I have the wisdom of that ancient bonsai!" 2x10

"Always take the lemonade. That's Handyman 101! So you watched Jeopardy with them and then what? Well, now we know what your problem is! You fixed their toilet, but you didn't fix their souls. Elena, growing up, I had everything. But I was always alone. I don't want my tenants to feel that way, so I do more than just fix stuff. Apartment 306, macrame with Mrs. Watson. 201, lose at chess to Mr. Roth. 402, listen to all their Cuban nonsense. That's the job. That's what takes four hours. That's the difference between being a handyman and a super." 2x10

Has heard 'you're fired' a lot. 2x10

"After a grueling 30 minutes of thought, Nikki, will you be my starter wife? You're on the rebound. That's the best time to get married. You don't have time to think. So you were never thinking about me? My emotions? My feelings? You used me, Nikki, Finn's mom! And not in the way I like! And that's not all, Sister Barbara. We knew each other. Biblically. And while we were doing it, she took the Lord's name in vain. A lot!" 2x11

"Last night, I was testing the pH of the water in my seahorse ranch and, as I looked at those vomiting little guys, I realized I suck at tests. All tests. Drug, sobriety, vision, IQ, smog. You name it, I fail it!" 2x12

"Have you ever been arrested?” “Does public nudity at a hockey game count?” “There is, uh, no mention of a public nudity charge in your file.” “Oh, you just go to YouTube and type in 'Zam-boner.'" 2x12

"Yeah, they didn't specifically ask if I got drunk and tried to ride a moose, so after that I was golden." 2x12

"How important is having kids to you?" "Never really thought about it." 2x12

"I'll have you know I babysat my babysitter's kids while she was babysitting my dad, so, yeah, I got a little experience under my belt. Oh, it's my cousin Gordy. He still thinks I'm full-on Canadian. All right, good news is Gordo bought it. Bad news is I'm judging a poutine festival in Saskatoon next week." 2x12

"You're the single greatest mother I know." "Thank you. That means a lot coming from a guy with five moms." 2x12

"Fuzzy Afghan she likes, picture of the Pope, picture of a different Pope, picture of your dad, picture of the family, picture of me with the family, picture of me by a waterfall. I'm just gonna keep talking 'cause I'm not good in crisis situations." 2x13

"It's so crazy how we're both immigrants. I mean, I would never compare my story to yours, but the parallels are spooky. You were 18, I was 18. You left your family behind. I left four step-families, a maid, a butler, a chauffeur, and a horse groomer who really got me. But Father was expanding his business to the US and so I had to go. I remember, at the airport, I was crying. But Father put his arm around me and he said, 'Son, only losers cry.' So that was a long flight. You don't know how dirty a dirty look can get until you're crying for a whole plane ride and you're not a baby. I really didn't wanna be in America. So I drank. And I recreated the snowy plains of Canada with cocaine. I'm told I attended classes at Pepperdine University, but I will have to take that on faith. So, I'm in a detox center in El Segundo. This was my fourth rehab. My re-re-re-rehab. I thought I'd been doing a kickass job keeping my drug stuff a secret from all the tenants and then you showed up in my room at that clinic. You brought me sopa de pollo and said it's Cuban penicillin. You told me, 'You eat this, you get some sleep, and tomorrow, you try again.' And then you tucked me in and kissed me good night on my forehead. Forehead kisses are wildly underrated. Just something really comforting about 'em. Then again, it might just be you. Dad never did that. Or my horse groomer. After I got out of rehab, I started hanging around your apartment a lot more, 'cause it helped. Back then, it must have felt like you had this annoying, intrusive guy over. Not like now. 'Cause now you're my family. Don't worry. I haven't legally changed my last name to Alvarez. My lawyer said it was a whole thing, so... Anyway, Pen said no crying, so I'm not gonna. Actually, for once, I agree with Father. Only losers cry. And we're not losing anybody today. Let's hit that oath ceremony soon, okay?" 2x13

#schneider #reference #odaat #one day at a time

[missguomeiyun]

Homecookings [Mar. ed]

I mentioned that I had a long stretch of evening shifts this month, so I’m starting off with a few pictures of my work dinners. I’m trying hard to up my dinner game haha food breaks on evenings are illegally longer, yes, I said it. Everyone knows; everyone does it. Furthermore, it’s also seemingly longer bcos there is no line-up for microwaves. It’s actually the microwave line & finding a seat to sit during day shift breaks that makes breaks seem a lot shorter. I don’t like evening shift, but day shift breaks are literally the worst part of working day shift. Ironic- breaks are the worst part of a shift. But it’s true! I just find myself wasting too much of my break time NOT actually sitting down & eating, you know?

Anyway, here are some of my dinners.

Pan-fried tofu + chicken + napa cabbage over rice noodles.

Here’s the rest of it. So I’ve learnt to pack soup separately - this was inspired by the delivery/take-out food system where noodles & soup are packed individually. I don’t know why I didn’t think of this before lol felt like my dinners could have been upgraded yrs ago.. . but it’s still not too late now! When I’m at work, I microwave the noodle/ingredients portion, then pour my hot soup from a thermos into the bowl ^^

Other food I bring include snack + yogurt.

Some days, I cook the same for both lunch & dinner. This was one of those examples. So for lunch, it’s dumpling + noodles.

Evening work dinner version: load noodles & dumplings into bowl, & again, soup separate =)  I had chicken soup that my mom made.

Work dinner 3: pasta! Every week I have at least 1 work meal that’s pasta. It’s easy & I love pasta!

This was baby clam + Korean fish cake strips + green cabbage over instant noodles. These were the bibim noodles, which means it comes with a spicy sauce. Thus, I kept that separate till after my bowl of food was microwaved, then I mixed it all together. No soup; just a spicy saucy noodle.

Now onto the regular non-work cooking~

Spicy rice cake soup with tofu & green cabbage

Homemade pho - sponsored by my brother haha he brought over beef & soup

Deonjang soup with rice cakes, chicken & lettuce on the bottom.

BLACK BEAN NOODLES!

Black bean noodles (aka jjajangmyeon) served with egg, yellow radish, & Korean fish cake. YUM

Up-ing my pancake game by adding parmesan cheese lol

I made 3 large/thick-ish pancakes with 1 cup of pancake mix. Added about 1 large tbsp of parmesan cheese powder. I wished I had added a LITTLE more. I could taste the cheese but. .. it would be better if I added just a teeny bit more. It made a difference though! Better than ‘no flavour’. I may try adding some dry chives to it next time :P

I’ve been using this brand of potato starch noodles. I’m not sure why they call it dried vermicelli. .. Honestly, there is no difference between the diff brands. This one isn’t particular cheaper or anything but it’s just a bigger bag & I eat these noodles pretty often so it’s more “convenient” vs re-stocking when I run out.

Yes.. . More black bean noodles haha

Dumplings in soup with napa cabbage & soup seaweed, plus a little bit of Korean salted shrimp sauce =]

& NOW, I AM ON STAYCATION! WOOOOOOOT!!!

Look forward to my posts in these next 10 days-ish! Will likely post 1 post a day :P hopefully!

#homemade #homecooking #cooking #cook #food #i cook #healthy #eat #no filter

[mystacoceti]

“A Disciple”, Primo Levi

The Hungarians arrived among us not a few at a time but en masse. Within two months, May and June of 1944, they had invaded the camp, convoy upon convoy, filling the void that the Germans had not failed to create by a series of diligent selections. They caused a profound change in the fabric of the camps. At Auschwitz, the wave of Magyars reduced all other nationalities to minorities, without, however, touching the “cadres,” which remained in the hands of the German and Polish common criminals.

All the barracks and all the work squads were flooded with Hungarians, around whom, as happens to new arrivals in all communities, an atmosphere of derision, gossip, and vague intolerance rapidly condensed. They were strong, simple workers and peasants, who did not fear manual labor but were used to plenty of food, and so in a few weeks they were reduced to pitiful skeletons. Others were professionals, students, and intellectuals who came from Budapest or other cities; they were meek individuals, slow, patient, and methodical, and hunger was not so hard on them, but they had delicate skin, and were soon covered with wounds and bruises, like ill-treated horses.

At the end of June a good half of my squad was made up of capable men who were still well nourished, still full of optimism and good humor. They communicated with us in a curious sung, drawled German, and among themselves in their exotic language, which is bristling with unusual inflections and seems to consist of interminable words, all pronounced at an irritatingly slow pace, and with the accent on the first syllable.

One of them was assigned to me as a mate. He was a robust, rosy young man, of medium height, whom everyone called Bandi—the diminutive of Endre, that is, Andrea, he explained to me, as if it were the most natural thing in the world. Our job, that day, was to carry bricks on a kind of crude wooden stretcher, equipped with two shafts in front and two behind—twenty bricks per trip. Halfway along the route was a superintendent, who made sure that the load was in order.

Twenty bricks are heavy, so on the way we didn’t have (or at least I didn’t) much breath for talking; but on the way back we spoke, and I learned many likable things about Bandi. I couldn’t repeat all of them today: all memories vanish, and yet I hold on to the memories of this Bandi as to something precious, I am content to set them down on a page, and I wish that, by some not impossible miracle, this page would reach him in the corner of the world where perhaps he is still living, and that he would read it, and would find himself in it.

He told me that his name was Endre Szántó, a name that’s pronounced approximately like santo, or saint, in Italian, which reinforced in me the vague impression of a halo encircling his shaved head. I said this to him; but no, he explained laughing, Szántó means “plowman,” or more generically “farmer”; it’s a very common last name in Hungary, and anyway he wasn’t a plowman but worked in a factory. The Germans had captured him three years earlier, not as a Jew but because of his political activity, and had assigned him to the Todt Organization and sent him to cut wood in the Ukrainian Carpathians. He had spent two winters in the woods, cutting down pine trees with three companions; it was hard work, but he had got on well there, almost happily. Indeed, I soon realized that Bandi had a unique talent for happiness: oppression, humiliation, work, exile seemed to slide over him like water over a rock, without corrupting or wounding him, in fact purifying him, and heightening in him an inborn capacity for joy, as in the story of the innocent, happy, pious Hasidim whom Jirí Langer describes in Nine Gates.1

He told me about entering the camp: when the train arrived, the SS had forced all the men to take off their shoes and hang them around their necks, and had made them walk barefoot on the gravel of the track bed, for the seven kilometers that separated the station from the camp. He recounted the episode with a timid smile, not looking for pity but, rather, with a trace of childish, playful vanity in having “made it.”

We did three trips together, during which, bit by bit, I tried to explain to him that the place he had ended up in was not for nice people or for quiet people. I tried to convince him of some of my recent discoveries (in truth, not yet well digested): that here, in order to get by, you had to be active, arrange for illegal food, avoid work, find influential friends, hide yourself, hide your thoughts, steal, lie; that those who didn’t behave like that soon died; and that his sanctity seemed to me dangerous and out of place. And since, as I said, twenty bricks are heavy, on the fourth trip, instead of picking up twenty bricks, I picked up seventeen, and showed him that if you arranged them on the stretcher in a certain way, with a space in the bottom layer, no one would suspect that there were not twenty. This was a trick I thought I had invented (though I later learned that it was in the public domain); I had performed it several times successfully, while other times I had been hit, but it seemed to me that it lent itself well to the pedagogic purpose, as an illustration of the theories that I had set forth a little earlier.

Bandi was very sensitive to his situation as Zugang, or new arrival, and the social subjection that derived from it, and so he didn’t resist; but he wasn’t at all enthusiastic about my discovery. “If there are seventeen, why should we make them think there are twenty?” “But twenty bricks weigh more than seventeen,” I replied impatiently, “and if they’re arranged right no one notices; anyway, they’re not being used to build your house or mine.” “Yes,” he said, “but still they are seventeen and not twenty.” He wasn’t a good disciple.

We worked for some weeks on the same squad. I learned from him that he was a Communist, a sympathizer, not enrolled in the Party, but his language was that of a proto-Christian. At work he was skilled and strong, the best on the squad, but he didn’t try to take advantage of his superiority, either to place himself in a favorable light with our German masters or to give himself airs with us. I told him that, in my view, working like that was a useless waste of energy, and it wasn’t even politically correct, but Bandi gave no sign of having understood. He didn’t want to lie; in that place we were supposed to work, therefore he worked as well as he could. Bandi, with his radiant, boyish face, with his energetic voice and his awkward gait, soon became very popular, a friend to all.

August arrived, with an extraordinary gift for me: a letter from home—an unheard-of event. In June, with a terrifying lack of awareness, and using a “free” Italian mason as my intermediary, I had written a message to my mother, who was in hiding in Italy, and had addressed it to a friend of mine named Bianca Guidetti Serra. I had done all this as one observes a ritual, without true hope of success; but my letter had arrived without a hitch, and my mother had answered by the same route. The letter from the sweet world burned in my pocket. I knew it was elementary prudence to be silent about it, and yet I couldn’t not speak of it.

At that time we were cleaning cisterns. I went down into my cistern, and with me was Bandi. In the weak lamplight, I read the miraculous letter, translating it quickly into German. Bandi listened attentively: he certainly couldn’t understand much, because German wasn’t my language or his, and then because the message was spare and reserved. But he understood what was essential to understand: that that piece of paper in my hands, which had reached me so precariously, and which I would destroy before evening, was nevertheless a breach, a gap in the black universe that crushed us, and that through it hope could pass. Or at least I think that Bandi, although Zugang, understood or intuited all this, because, when I had finished reading, he came over to me, dug in his pockets for a long time, and finally extracted, with loving care, a radish. Blushing intensely, he gave it to me, and said, with timid pride, “I’ve learned. This is for you: it’s the first thing I ever stole.”

—

1. Jirí Langer (1894–1943) was a Jewish poet and scholar; his book Nine Gates to the Hasidic Mysteries described his experiences among the Hasidim of eastern Galicia.

#pearl diver #whole hog