#no shes not human but it makes sense in context shh

[bestworstcase]

some thoughts—messy ones—abt this beat:

this moment gets brought up with… honestly surprising regularity when people want to make a point about cinder being -redeemable- because she is, obviously, freaked out here. and like i don’t disagree that this scene and this specific beat in particular is doing really critical work to set up cinder’s villain->hero arc (not redemptive) but i do think “see! she’s repulsed by his wanton brutality!” is an odd and kind of reductive way to parse what’s happening here bc

that

is

a

grimm

thats a grimm. cinder reveled in the mass hysteria and violence she authored at the fall of beacon, personally reduced ozpin to a charred smear on the floor, and murdered a seventeen year old child in cold blood and gloated about it later. her first and only coping mechanism for Feels Bad is Killing People. it sparks joy. but she can’t stomach the sight of her coworker mauling a grimm.

ok? context is important. zoom out—

this is how salem’s training her—trying to train her—to mastery of the grimm arm. just throwing grimm at her until she reflexively falls back on her human arm, and then drops.

enough. i thought you were the girl who wanted power. stop holding back. if you want to master your new power, you must—

enter tyrian. and then for the whole dialogue between him and salem cinder gets framed like this:

folds hands.

the point of this scene is that cinder did lie to salem; she is not The Girl Who Wanted Power. what did she tell rhodes after she killed the madame? “i won’t have to run now.” she wants a home. she wants to be safe. she wants freedom. she believes—because the world has never given her a reason to believe otherwise—that becoming powerful is the only way she can ever get what she wants. but she does not, per se, want power.

and salem does not understand this because cinder has hitherto been very careful to keep her true motivation hidden, primarily because the last time she showed vulnerability her quasi-parental mentor immediately drew on her and shattered her ability to trust into a billion itty bitty pieces. cinder is, throughout this scene, very careful not to let salem see any of the stricken or pleading looks that the audience gets to see.

stop holding back.

tyrian interrupts when he does because salem can’t see through the mask cinder has presented to her (and is frustrated because she therefore can’t understand why cinder is being so timid with the phenomenal power she used to, it bears repeating, literally wipe the floor with ozpin)—and because what cinder takes from all of this is that salem wants her to be more brutal, like tyrian. there’s a reason cinder starts practicing on illusory rubys after this and why she’s frustrated and confused by salem’s judicious tactics in V5.

see? the beginning is the end and the end is the beginning; the scene is mirrored and tyrian is the looking glass. this:

is the guilt later renewed as horror:

there’s layers to cinder having this empathetic response to grimm when grimm are subjected to violence. obviously part of it is that cinder herself is grimm, at least in part, and that identification is conspicuously made present in the scene—

—but it goes beyond that. “you turned yourself into a monster just for power”/“look who’s talking.” think about how tenderly cinder says “shh, this is your home now” to the wyvern in V3. grimm are not the monsters in cinder’s story; they never have been. the abuse she suffered from her own kind was so horrific and unrelenting that it engendered a sense of kinship with the grimm. before she got that arm she was stitching grimm markings into the sleeves of her dress.

but insofar as this beat and this scene is integral to cinder’s nascent villain->hero arc the load-bearing pillar here is the contradiction between cinder’s notional aspiration (power) and her true motivation (freedom safeguarded by power), and the way her identification with and empathy for the grimm are tied up in that and the manner in which she tries to give salem what she thinks salem wants from her (i.e. be more like tyrian). which all comes back around with this ->

notably in 8.6 salem not only recants her harsh treatment of cinder since cinder returned but also reverses the things she says to cinder in 4.11. “i thought you were the girl who wanted power […] then stop holding back” -> “you’ve fought your whole life unwaveringly for what you want, and here i am holding you back instead of lifting you up.”

basically the rivalry between cinder and tyrian pulls a lot of symbolic weight because what tyrian represents vis-a-vis the salem-cinder dynamic is their shared misunderstanding of each other; salem accepts the ruthless power-hunger at face value and cinder reads into salem’s frustration a desire for cinder to be more brutal and both of them are incorrect. the framing of the disciplinary/apology scene in 8.6 communicates the shifting paradigm in part by adjusting his prominence in the composition of key shots before and after the pivot. and then salem sends him away to babysit the c-lister in vacuo.

point being the narrative development toward cinder’s villain->hero arc is also the narrative development toward salem’s villain->hero arc because they are structurally interdependent and constructed as a set; they’re meant to happen together and because of each other. that’s the trajectory. also cinder is keeping the arm and salem is not getting ungrimmed thank you goodnight

#grimm are people!

[dungeonsandblorbos]

Campaign Intros: North Pines Camp

having gone through all my PCs, let's dive into the campaigns they come from!

North Pines Camp, a Monster of the Week campaign, was my first time ever playing a ttrpg. the campaign was short and sweet, only running 10 sessions, and my notes are absolute trash. did i memorialize some funny out of context quotes and snapshot moments? you betcha! did i manage to write down enough info to reconstruct the basic mysteries we solved? yes, barely. did i bother writing down anything about my fellow PCs? except for the fact that one of them likes chips on their sandwiches, nope! did i bother noting where the camp actually is or anything about its layout or the nearby town? also nope! did i do anything to help me remember who NPCs were or what they looked like? not really!

this campaign happened, like, five + years ago now. i have played four five other campaigns in the meantime. my memory isn't very good in general, but between the time and bad notes, my memory of this campaign is very minimal. any story times from North Pines Camp will be very brief and won't have a lot of context because i don't know either

but ~anyway~

the setting

North Pines Camp (NPC) is a children's summer camp in (i think) central Oregon, USA. once upon a time it was a training grounds for monster hunters, but it's been 100% properly converted now. definitely. no banjo-playing vampires or child-stealing witches in the woods. nope. not here

the camp is set up on the north end of a lake, and there's another camp on the other side of the lake called South Pines Camp. there's a stable and places to play sports, and a few different activity lodges. Saraki Lodge hosts dances. Newman has a variety of board and card and other tabletop games, including a strange Cards Against Humanity set that seems to have come from another dimension with its own incomprehensible memes. somewhere i think there's also a theatre and an arts and crafts room? and of course a cafeteria/mess hall and nurse's station. and a big garden!

there's also a small town nearby that might be called Acorn. fewer than four thousand people live there, and it's also haunted. cool places to hang out include the Acorn Museum and the abandoned combo KFC/Pizza Hut

the other PCs

Izzy: played with the Spell-Slinger playbook, i think. a fellow camp counselor. she has long blue hair, eats tomatoes like they're apples, and likes her cereal with orange juice. she also eats raw eggs. she once got possessed by a ghost in the abandoned KFC/Pizza Hut and helped him fulfill his dying wish of eating fried chicken

Malcolm: played with the Mundane playbook, i think. a fellow camp counselor. he has brown hair and green eyes and likes chips on his sandwiches. at one point he dresses up as a girl (to try to trick a lonely banjo-playing vampire into kidnapping him shh it makes sense in context) and, while pretending to be a girl, refers to Indie as his boyfriend

the NPCs of NPC

Lawrence: a camp administrator with a spooky personal cabin in the woods where he keeps a bunch of stuff from the old camp. lots of weapons, a monster manual poorly co-written by the original camp's three founders, stuff like that. i think he was magical in some way bc i have a random note about his arm turning to silver but literally nothing else about him during that mission. he has a walking stick that, and i quote from my notes, "is actually a deer"

Gabby: another camp admin who knows about the monster stuff. her DJ name is DJ Gabby Gabs. i think she was normally the one telling us to go investigate things

Gabe O'Malley: the only one i have a last name for? like i said, my notes for this campaign are terrible! he's another camp admin and has his own cabin, where the wifi is named "mancave dog chow." he helped us identify some magical items. that's it that's all i wrote about him

Eugene: some sort of authority figure, or maybe custodial staff? he likes pickles. 9:30 (am? pm? idfk) is Eugene's pickle time. he has a secret fridge in Newman that's literally just filled with pickles. all of the notes i have referencing him are about pickles.

Preston: the head chef. he's got a weed stash somewhere and has a personal mini fridge equipped with a polaroid camera to catch thieves. Indie once stole something from his fridge and then stole the polaroid of himself stealing things

Baltimore: a fellow counselor and the campaign butt monkey--we made fun of him a lot. to be fair, he made himself very easy to make fun of. a lifeguard at the camp and elementary education major who slathers himself in way too much sunscreen and puts way too much mayo on his sandwiches. he's lactose intolerant, and his favorite dessert is vegan cheesecake. his favorite game is jenga. he likes both Neutral Milk Hotel and Mariah Carey. at one point we accused him of having a foot fetish. as a side note, he's 5'8" with "tousled black hair" and frequent bags under his eyes, which makes him sound like maybe he was kind of adorkable actually? he probably did not deserve all the grief we gave him

Paleontology Paul: a fellow counselor who may have been ordained? he made holy water for us once. he dresses like he's going on a dig. i think we joked about trying to set him up with Baltimore; i say "i think" because i have a bullet point in my notes that just says "paultimore" as if that means anything

The Katies: there's five people named Katy at NPC. one is a lifeguard, one does sports, one works the stables, and the other two are both counselors. Katy Quinn, aka Horse Katy, has a daughter named Susie

Derek "Turg" Turgle: Indie's counselor in training. about 16. wears brotanks and has his hair cut like Sokka's from A:tLA. he does yoga. at one point he sees a mysterious fancy cologne in the cabin and assumes it's Indie's, so he sprays himself with it and then immediately disappears into a spooky shadow realm/pocket dimension controlled by a youth-stealing witch. he's okay though; we rescued him

Torvold: a hot Swedish guy built like Thor. i think he was another camp counselor? he loves America and also gets possessed in the KFC/Pizza Hut by the fried-chicken-seeking ghost

the plot

there isn't one. it's more of an episodic campaign, which is pretty normal for this system

#campaign intros #north pines camp #monster of the week #Indigo Sullivan #ttrgp stories

[insufferablelust]

Naughty list. (ThrilledAu!Mgg x Reader)

Warnings : Slight smut, Spanking, D/s themed ofc, The use of ‘sir’ & ‘daddy’, mention of edging, mention of overstimulation for future reference, sadist!mgg, condescending!dom, Marking, Its.. um Filthy as many of you already know. Please read at your own discretion.

Hello this is the christmas one shot i’ve promised, its 3 am rn and im so sorry i just done finishing this because things had been so chaotic. But i hope y’all enjoy and please wait up patiently for my next fics which will come in the next several days as promised.

PLEASE NOTE : This blurb sets inside my Thrilled Au, after the Bratty Rendezvous chapter which i have yet to upload, though i will upload it very soon. So basically this fic is the filler chapter and a teaser for the two upcoming chapters of thrilled! so i hope that makes sense and i hope y’all enjoy it. Happy holidays and Merry christmas! Take care, x D

MASTERLIST HERE.

He felt her before he even opens his eyes, a small smile threaten to quirk at the side of her lips in response to the feeling of small kisses all along his face down to his neck— the oh so warm familiar kisses by the love of his life.

“Matthew wake up.” Y/N whispered, giggling to herself as she felt him grunt below her at the feeling of her sinful lips nips and bites onto his skin, “It’s christmas morning, come on daddy.” She whispered once more, but this time doing it with grinding down where her bum was sat prettily atop of his crotch, just enough to make him wrap his hand around her neck.

“And just what do you think you’re doing?” His grip tighten a bit just then, as her eyes closed and a smile etched beautifully onto her lips. Matthew scoffed at her reaction before sitting up on the bed, bringing her up with him so he could lean against the headboard.

“J-just waking you..” Was all that she could manage, with shallow breaths and innocently batting her lashes up at him. “Oh, princess..” He murmured as he finally took in the sight of her.

She’s perched up beautifully on her lap, with her thigh high christmas themed socks, his sweater and a collar— a special one he had gifted her a few days prior, with the color red and his named engraved on the inside lining where nobody could see but she certainly could feel. On the outside, it might look like a normal choker necklace but they both know very well that that’s not the case. Its a symbol of him, latched onto her every second of the day— its their dynamic, its how they work.

“You look like a dream, little one..” He gasped, as she whines on his lap, a perfect little noise reserved only for him, making his hard on pressed oh so good against her bottom. “Dressed up for y-you!” Y/N exclaimed happily and slightly out of breath by the way Matthew’s grip just tightens and tightens— just like he was trying to squeeze the cuteness out of her.

God, you’re his, and his his his only.

“I know baby, so so pretty for me, being so so good.” He gave her cheek a pretty light slap, just to make her gasp and leave her sweet little mouth open slightly— all messy and beautiful. “Thank you daddy, just for you.” She smiled then, awaiting for his instruction just like how he likes it— or more importantly, just like how she craves it.

Matthew cocks his head to the side a little as he contemplates on what he’s going to do with her, it’s always like this with them— just wanting to do so many things, explore everything, explore each other’s limits, especially hers. Always hers, he thinks, whatever makes her happy.

So with a simple instruction he lessen the grip on her neck before pressing a small kiss on her forehead, “Go to our room now, and be on your position, daddy has to make some calls for our party this evening but you better be on your position by the time i get there or else.” He taps her cheeks twice, eyes pierced onto hers— as she nods a little, “yes daddy.”

“Go on.” She smiled before pressing a gentle peck to his lips, getting up and padded her tiny feet towards the door, “Oh and princess?”

“Yes daddy?”

“anything off but the socks and your collar.”

—

He’s doing this on purpose, your mean mean daddy is doing this on purpose— making you wait on your knees by the bench inside your dungeon, just waiting and waiting until you feel your knees beginning to fall asleep on you. But you tried your best to be presentable, just how daddy likes it.

Your body jumps a little when the sound of his footsteps rang through the room, sound of the door closing has your feet tingling and your cunt wet, oh he could definitely see the glisten gleam from it for sure.

“I thought you’d be well acquainted with my rules by now, pup.” He let out a disapproving sigh, which made your cheeks warmer and you instantly straighten your back, part your thigh a little and gulps— trying to remember what you did wrong this time.

“I—“

“Ah ah, you know better than to speak without my permission in this room do you?” He scoffed, walking around the room just to tantalize you, sending shiver up your spine. “you were good this morning, so good that daddy had half the mind to make you cum but now i’m not so sure.” He adds, which earn a gasp from you, Oh how you wanted to cum, you want to cum so so bad, the last time you did was a week ago when you were still in Paris— but right after your little bratty rendezvous there was no way in hell, he’d let you cum, oh no no, kitten doesn’t deserve to cum until master says so.

You bit your lip in agony, trying to block the tears that were about to slip from your pretty eyes down your heated cheeks, just trying to do anything he asks— anything. You let out a gasp as he tilt your chin up, which he cooed at and sigh softly, whilst his thumb brush side to side on top of your lips.

“Look at your tears, baby. Do you think it’ll work? hm? you think because daddy’s little elf put on a show this morning, that daddy is going to let this slide?” He pouts condescendingly, watching as the tears finally dripped down your cheeks, oh he wanted to photograph this so bad, his little fairy.

“Go on, answer daddy.” He pats your cheek with his thumb as you tried to find the courage to speak, “I-I’m sorry d-daddy.. i.. please..” Matthew sighed softly, seeing the genuine regret behind your eyes has him reprimanding your punishment, daddy was a tamer, but he was and will always be fair— forgetfulness is a human mistake, besides it’s christmas, and he figured he needed to give you something from all the torture you’ve endured since Paris.

“Up, princess. Let daddy braid your hair.” He tugged her collar a little which earned a gasp from her, though it was a combination between the sensation on her neck and realization on what she did wrong, “Daddy i—“

“Shh, up.” He cuts you off before you could mutter an apology, or several apologies. You should’ve known better, if he told you to be on position, what he always meant is for you to be on your knees by the bench, with your hair untied specifically because he likes to braid you before play time, and today you’ve put your hair up, completely forgetting a clear important rule. Matthew helped you get on your shaky feet, as you trembled a little, whispering a small, “thank you daddy.” Before facing the bench, back toward him so he could process on your hair.

“Tell daddy why he’s punishing you tonight.” He hummed behind her, fingers expertly tangle and untangle through her hair, looping each side to the center as he formed a perfect braid from the top of her hair and making his way down. “Because i forgot daddy’s rule.” You muttered shakily, voice laced with regrets at yourself for disappointing daddy.

“Which rule is it, pup?” His voice seemed so close now, she could practically feel his warm breath against her skin that she zoned out for a moment before a tug on her hair brought her back, “I— i didn’t untie my hair, sir.”

“Why is it important?”

“Because daddy needs to braid my hair, and.. and it teaches me to.. remembers daddy’s rules.” You finished with a sigh, before feeling a soft kiss placed on top of your shoulder blades, “10 with my hands. Go and bend over the bench, bunny.”

—

Y/N braced herself as she felt the stinging, heated sensation smacked across her bottom, making her grip tighten onto the railing bench and her body shakes a little. “F-Five, thank y-you daddy.”

“Color?” Matthew pressed his palm against her stinging skin as he try to soothe the aching pain a bit, it’s true that they both love this— loves the thrill, the pain, and the overall pleasure that comes from this. However, Matthew would never enjoy hurting his bunny without any context, or out of proportion, it might look like he has all the control but they both knows well that she has all the control, if she wants to stop, she knows what she needed to say.

“G-Green sir please.” Oh how he loves the way her voice croaked underneath him, the way she arched her back toward him— as if asking for more, ready for more just as she deserve, as she behaved. So he delivered then, 3 slaps in a row as she cries out between each milliseconds, and sobs out the thank you’s and pleas.

“just two more now, y’think you can take it, petal?” Matthews hand crept up to where your collar snuggly wrapped around your neck, thumbing the soft leather as he makes sure you’re still okay which you confirmed by a ‘yes daddy, please continue’

The last two slaps were unexpected, catching her off guard as it landed way way below where her cunt drips dewy sweet honey, and where her by now— swollen little pearl sits, making her jumps and scream out in a blissed pleasure. “Fuck! oh! nine ten! daddy thank you!”

“Shh shh, come here, good girl.” Matthew gently helped her stand before picking her up bridal style and sit down onto the bed which was installed on their room, his lips were pressed tightly onto her forehead as he soothes her aching skin and mumble calming words. “It’s okay, ‘s all over, such a good girl, little one.”

“Daddy...”

“Yes angel?”

“Do i deserve to cum now?”

“Oh petal, you will be begging to stop cumming later, just you wait.”

—

EXCUSE MY GRAMMARS AND TYPOS, my laptop is not accessible right now so i have to use my phone to write and upload so please bear with me. Thank you, i love you and take care.

Don’t forget to support!❤️

Taglist! (reply or message me if you want to be added or removed)

( @slutforthegubes @maybankslut @midnightsubmissives @bxnnywriting @keentreeoperatorcookie @autisticratty @mjwritesfics @getdevils @muffin-cup @tomsmilkytea @sinnersandsugars @edgycowboy666 @mgg-theprettiestboy @addie5264 @hushfakebitches @bucksgoat )

#spencer reid smut #mgg smut #insufferableblurb #dom!mgg #matthew gray gubler smut #thrilled

[cutesuki--bakugou]

My Dream

a/n: I 1000000% know that unless you’ve read my fic The Dragon Kings Treasure, this is going to be TOTALLY out of context and you will likely have literally no idea about what’s going on or their history. I’ll be posting this little snippet in my AO3 post at the end of the story if you feel like you’d rather read the full thing first before you read this. There’s also a shit ton of spoilers in this, so if you’ve been planning on reading TDKT and haven’t yet, I’d suggest doing that first or you’ll end up spoiling the majority of the story.

Main Pairing: Katsuki Bakugou x Koge Naegi (OC) (Fantasy AU)

Featuring: Kirishima Eijirou (the dragon Red from the main story)

Story Rating: Mature

Genre: Fluff / Romance / Domestic / Fantasy AU

Story Warnings: | Mentions of: Alcohol, Abuse (sexual / physical / mental), Enslavement, Wounds, Pregnancy | Lots of fluff, supportive and squishy Bakugou, dragon breeding / mating terms, cursing, lots of hugging and kissing

Words: 4,530

Written for the @bnhabookclub​​ ‘s members bingo event!

Crossed off: Fairy Tale AU

Bingo Masterlist

Art in banner by me

“You alright, Koge? You look like you’re about to shit yourself.” 

“H-huh?” 

Koge was startled out of her stupor by the familiar low growl of her lover’s voice, pulling her gaze from the crowd of people below them to look up. At first, her keen eyes glanced over the ornate headpiece he wore, the jewels and beads flickering with the reflected yellow light of the torches perched up on the walls on either side of their balcony. His crimson glare, softened with concern, gleamed with a similar brilliance, and Koge found herself blushing fiercely just from looking at him. Head tilting to the side a bit in slight annoyance of her having not heard him properly, the blonde fluffy hair Bakugou sported bobbed with the movement, beads and jewelry clacking. 

“I asked if you were okay. You’ve been sitting here like an actual statue from the instant we got here.” 

“I’m okay… Just… there’s more people than I expected there to be…” Koge fiddled nervously with a lock of her white hair, which spilled over her shoulders in loose curls, styled expertly by servants who pampered her in preparation for this huge event. Well, calling it just an ‘event’ was a huge understatement. In fact, it was her wedding reception, the ceremony having just been completed not even an hour earlier. She knew that she should be enjoying herself, but every moment of the night had been much more stressful than she could have ever anticipated. Bakugou had warned her that it would be very busy and festive, as was the culture she was marrying into, but that still didn’t prepare her for this. Hundreds of people, from commoners, to politicians, to royalty from other countries, all gathered below.

Not only were they there to celebrate the marriage of their Lord and his Lady, but also the recent liberation of their kingdom from the tyrant that had stolen the land many, many years ago. The rightful ruler had returned, and brought with him a lover and heir, and though the boy was tucked safely away from the festivities, just the fact that the child was alive and healthy was to be celebrated. It truly was a joyous time, and still, Koge couldn’t quite gather the courage to be herself. She was sure that everyone in this room thought her odd, and that Bakugou’s choice in marrying her was a foolish one. After all, she was a dragon halfling that had lived in a forest for over three hundred years, on top of the fact that she couldn’t understand a single word of regular human speech. How was she supposed to help rule this land if she couldn’t even properly communicate?  

Koge had brought this to Bakugou’s attention, of course, but he was quick to shut down her negative thoughts. She was who he wanted, who he loved, and after having nearly lost her, he refused to even entertain the thought of not having her by his side. How fiercely the two of them had fallen for each other wasn’t something that Koge could easily explain nor really understand herself, especially after all the trauma she had experienced this past year. Being used as a slave the way she was, abused and pushed to her limits had made her feel like no one could ever truly accept her again. Yet here she was, sitting beside Bakugou in their thrones, a brilliant ring on her finger and a fresh tattoo of the country's brand on her right shoulder to match his. They were connected now by more than just love, though nothing could ever be more significant to her than the way she felt for him. 

Other people didn’t have to understand it, nor did they have to necessarily approve. They just had to accept and shut their mouths, as Bakugou had put it earlier that day before the ceremony even began. Would he have been better off marrying a princess from another country? Probably. Did he have offers thrown at him like mad all the way up until the day of the wedding? Of course he did, and he ignored every single one, even those that were so brash as to come waltzing up to the palace gates with the proposed bride in tow. It had been annoying, and hurt Koge’s already bruised confidence in the beginning, but each time she heard him snap that he already had a bride, she only fell even further in love with him. 

“I had told you there would be a lot.” Bakugou reached across the gap between their thrones to take her fidgeting hand gently, holding it securely with a comforting grip. “Relax. No one will act up if that’s what you’re nervous about.” 

“I’m… mostly nervous about when we go down there to mingle, and I won’t be able to understand the conversation… What if someone addresses me and I just stand there like an idiot?” 

“I wouldn’t let that happen. I’ll tell you. And besides, you’ve gotten really good at reading lips lately. You’ll be fine.” Bakugou brought his hand up as he leaned over, kissing her petite fingers tenderly. “If you get too overwhelmed, we can take a break.” His lips trailed across her skin until he reached where her jeweled silver wedding band rested, pressing a final, lingering kiss on top of it. “I won’t let this go wrong. I love you.” 

More heat rushed to Koge’s cheeks, smiling as she stroked his finger with her thumb. “I love you, too. Aahh, I can’t believe you’re finally my mate!” Koge’s tail wagged about happily behind her, since her throne was specially made with a gap to accommodate the long and slender appendage. 

“Tch,” Bakugou’s cheeks flushed behind his ceremonial makeup, his lips pressed against her fingers in his embarrassment. “We’re technically just married in a human sense, we haven’t officially… mated yet. In a dragon sense. Not even sure if we really can.” 

“You could always let me do that.” Koge gave him a sly grin, showing off her sharp canines. “Your human side is more prominent than your dragon, anyways! You don’t go into rut like I go into heat--” 

“Shh!” Bakugou snapped at her to hush, his face and ears only flushing darker as Koge broke out into giggles at the sight of him growing flustered just by the mere mention of her marking him. “We’ll talk about it later! People will get confused if they hear you call me that, just stick to husband, will ya?!” 

“Okay, okay! I just think that calling you my mate is cuter.” 

“Ooh, you two finally moving on to ‘mate’ status, are you?” 

The familiar cheery voice pulled the couples attention, both of them peering around the sides of their thrones to see a sharp toothed, grinning redhead pop out of the curtains behind them. Koge had been able to smell him approaching, so he hadn’t started her, but Bakugou was immediately frustrated at his appearance. 

“You fucking lard, get out of here! You aren’t allowed up here!” 

“Hey man, I’m not a lard right now! If you didn’t want me to be able to go where I wanted, you shouldn’t have let me be enchanted or whatever.” Squatting down behind the thrones, familiar reddish-orange eyes glanced back and forth between the couple curiously. “How’s it goin’? You guys good up here on your own?” 

“You’re so protective, Red.” Koge gave a small smile, purring sweetly with the presence of her kin. “Oops, Kiri, I mean. You should go enjoy the party instead of waiting around up here.” 

“How long have you been guarding us?! That’s not your job!” Bakugou huffed, releasing Koge’s hand as she took it back to herself. “We have soldiers for that, Kirishima.” 

“No one’s better suited to guard you than me,” Kirishima’s already wide grin somehow grew, smoke rising from between his teeth in a mild territorial display. “Though, I didn’t come up here just to be annoying. People are wondering when you’re going to come down.” 

“Uhm…” Koge reached up to touch her blue crystal headpiece tenderly, making sure it hadn’t moved. “Well… We have been up here a bit, and we already did the speech or whatever. Maybe we should?” 

Bakugou’s glare softened as he caught Koge’s pale blue gaze, silent for a moment as he considered their options. “I haven’t brought it up because I wanted to make sure you were comfortable first.” 

Koge smiled, her cheeks flushing a bright pink, bringing her white freckles to attention. “If I’m with you, I’ll be okay, Katsuki. Let’s go.” Standing together, she took his arm as he offered it to her, stepping in close with her hand resting tenderly on his bicep. “Just don’t let me trip again, I’m not used to shoes!” 

“Right. You klutz.” Bakugou chuckled, glancing at Kirishima as the redhead popped up and vanished back behind the curtains, pulling them open to allow the two easy access to the stairway. Before they went down, he went ahead, his thick, red scaled tale swaying about behind him with each step. It was odd to Bakugou to see his childhood dragon companion in human form, but it had been something Red really wanted, and as a reward for his heroic part in taking back their country, Bakugou awarded him an enchantment that gave him a human body. He could transform at will now, which was both helpful and frustrating, as he often still lost control of his ability when he got flustered or protective, transforming into a giant dragon in a crowded room on more than one occasion. 

As they reached the bottom of the stairs, Koge let out a nervous, trembling breath, her eyes darting this way and that as she observed the crowds. Immediately upon their arrival to the party floor, the entire room erupted in claps and cheers, the more rowdy and belligerent of Bakugou’s people breaking through the polite applause with loud curses and well wishes. 

“So loud,” Koge spoke softly, covering her mouth with delicate fingers. “Oh-! That was a sword being thrown over there, did you see it?!” 

Snickering, Bakugou gave one of his friends a rough slap on the shoulder as they passed him, making their way deeper into the group. “Koge, the fancy ceremony is over. Now’s the time to let loose. Just don’t let anyone step on your tail.” 

Let loose they did. With a mix of their presence, alcohol, good food, and music, the entire huge ballroom was shifted into a rowdy swarm of dancing bodies. The adrenaline, cheer, and pure excitement was contagious, and Koge could barely even hear anyone over the music enough to worry about if she could understand them. Just as he swore to her, Bakugou never left her side, except allowing her to dance with Kirishima. Watching her from the sidelines, Bakugou’s heart felt full to the brim with happiness, just her smile and laughter enough to send him over the moon. 

If he were honest, he couldn’t believe that they were actually here in this moment. He could clearly remember just over a year ago, where he was cold, hungry, alone and lost, chasing a dream. But now, he had achieved that dream, and gained a treasure that was more precious to him than any jewel in the world. He had Koge and his son, the start of a family he never thought he’d have, and a happiness he was sure would be eternal. 

“Katsuki!” Koge squealed with laughter as she was spun towards her lover, immediately caught and wrapped in his strong embrace. “Kiri is a crazy dancer! Don’t let me do that again!” 

Before Bakugou could respond, there was a change in song, one which was an incredibly popular group dance that called hordes of people to the dance floor. Instead of getting pulled in with them, Bakugou was able to weasel himself and his wife out of the crowd, ducking out of the ballroom and out into the surrounding gardens. He didn’t stop until he was sure they were out of sight, letting the little halfling stand as steady as she could on wobbling legs. Giggling with her adrenaline, Koge held onto his arms for support, looking up at him through disheveled hair. 

“Why are we out here?” 

Unable to resist a snarky smirk in amusement of her appearance, Bakugou pushed her hair back out of her face before caressing her cheeks with both hands, leaning in to kiss her lips. “Koge, you wouldn’t have been able to survive that group dance. You look like you need some air, anyway.” 

“I do!” Koge took a few steps back from him, shifting off the heavy ornamental shawl she wore to expose her more dainty lace bodice and chiffon blouse beneath it. Letting it rest on the clean grass, Koge then slipped out of her shoes, sighing in relief as her sore feet met the cool ground. “That feels good!” 

Following her example, Bakugou shifted off his cape, tossing it away with her shawl, and his boots were quick to follow. “Fuck shoes. Honestly, I can’t wait to get out of all this ornamental crap!” 

“Yes, fuck shoes.” Koge came up to stand in front of him, tenderly taking both of his hands in hers once they were free. Still feeling full of energy, Koge began to sway her arms and hips from side to side along with the music, which whispered across the garden to be swallowed by the moonlight. “It’s interesting how your culture is so focused on jewelry and ornamental things for ceremonies, especially since everyone is so… not fancy.” 

Bakugou chuckled, allowing his arms to sway with hers as she moved. “A lot of this stuff has been passed down through my family for a really long time and it’s old as shit. I have to wear the traditional crap, but you get everything brand new.” 

“There’s nothing traditional for the person marrying into the family?” 

“The tradition is that the person marrying in gets new items and jewelry especially made for them. Usually, depending on if it’s a man or woman marrying in, the Lord or Lady would offer them one item from their time being married in. But… my mother's unique items were lost. All that was left was the shit I’m wearing. Besides, this is the start of a new generation. You deserve all the new and glittery shit.” 

Koge purred sweetly as Bakugou caressed his cheeks, pressing his lips against her forehead. She let her arms rest around his torso, her tail coming around to wrap around their hips to link them together. “My Katsuki…” As another soft kiss was placed onto her lips, Koge’s keen hearing picked up on a change in the music, making her turn her gaze back towards the ballroom. “Oh, wait, isn’t that our slow song we’re supposed to dance to? Should we go back?” 

“Fuck it,” Bakugou turned her face back towards him with gentle pressure, once again catching her lips. With his affection, he began to sway them to the music, one arm wrapping around her waist while the other stayed firmly in place against her neck. Koge couldn’t resist him, her soft purr rumbling in her chest as she felt cocooned in his warmth, catching his gaze as a smile crossed his lips. 

“You sure, Katsuki?” 

“I want this moment for us, Koge. I don’t give a shit about all those people watching us… All I care about is you.” Taking a step back with the music cue, it took very little for Koge to realize that he still wanted to do the dance they practiced, so she followed his lead with very little fumbling. 

As they danced, barefoot out in the grass with nothing but moonlight to guide their way, Koge began to feel like she had truly found her peace. She never thought that she would see him again, let alone be calling him her mate, and how lucky she was to be here like this hadn’t quite hit her until that moment. With a spin beneath his arm, it was as if her movements turned a lock that she had been refusing to unlatch that entire night in fear of what may come rushing out. Of course, it was an overwhelming mix of happiness, disbelief, excitement, and even a dash of sadness that all of this might not last. With it all came the tears, and though she tried to hold them back, they fell free with a hitching of her breath once she was pressed back up against his body to rock slowly. 

“Koge?” 

Shoving her face into his chest to try and hide it from him, Koge tried to choke down a sob, her tail once again coming to wrap around them both. “Sorry, Katsuki… It’s… It’s nothing.” 

“It doesn’t sound like nothing.” Bakugou stroked the back of her head softly, being considerate of her headpiece and jewelry. “Talk to me.” 

His strong grip holding her close calmed and comforted her enough to take a deep breath, though she still couldn’t find it in herself to look up at him. “I’m so happy… I really am. But I just… I worry about what happens next… What if I still can’t recover and I… all I do is cause you trouble. You’d end up sick of me…” 

Frowning, Bakugou’s eyes moved to Koge’s horns, which were still cracked and shattered from her recent enslavement. They were a visible representation of how broken she was inside, her months of abuse at the hands of those that had taken her - no, those whom he had sold her to - had deeply embedded trauma and fears that wouldn’t be healed easily. It had been five months now that he had brought her home after rescuing her from the fate he had selfishly forced upon her, and there were so many things that hadn’t returned to them. He had expected her healing to take a long time, he had no right to complain or be upset about the way she acted in certain situations, but that didn’t stop him from craving what they had before, when their love was fresh and uninhibited. 

Her worries about upsetting him were justified, however. It was true that things were incredibly difficult, with her constant nightmares and panic attacks set off by something as simple as his hand coming to rest on the back of her neck or the sound of his belt slipping loose from his pants. Kissing without worry was something they had achieved just a little over two weeks ago, but if it escalated too quickly, Koge would pull back and her insecurities of her body would breach the surface. She was too ashamed of herself to still hardly let him look at her naked, let alone touch or make love to her. Her comfort and happiness were very easily crushed, and though Bakugou had done his best to tread carefully, there were times where his brash personality caused a whole new round of issues. 

Yes, there were things that were difficult and that made their reconnection slow going, but it was the times that the improvement shone through that made Bakugou feel hopeful. Her sweet purrs at his touch. Her cheeks flushing. A smile instead of a grimace. One less article of clothing when she crawled into bed with him. Her pointed ears twitching in excitement at the sound of his footsteps instead of hunched and fearful shoulders. The courage to be alone instead of panicking without him or Kirishima by her side. How protective she was of their son calming enough to let him carry the child around the castle without her at his heels. All of these things had been nearly impossible to achieve the first month or two of her being with him again, and although most issues were something that anyone else would roll their eyes at, Bakugou couldn’t help but feel over the moon with each little step towards progress. 

“That’s not true, Koge,” Bakugou ran a thumb up and down along the length of one of her horns, the smooth glasslike texture cool beneath his naturally flushed skin. “At all. If only you could see things through my eyes. Yes, it can be difficult sometimes, but your recovery is going a lot quicker than you think. Like just this morning, while we laid in bed before Matsuki woke up… You let me touch you and kiss every uncovered inch of you. You’re so damn beautiful, it made me happy just to get to praise you like that. Just to get the chance to adore you.” Cupping both of her cheeks, he used only gentle persuasion to prompt her to look up at him, his thumbs lightly wiping away her tears without streaking her ceremonial makeup. “I will always adore you. And I’m willing to wait an eternity for you.” 

More tears replaced the ones he had wiped away, bringing Koge to sniffle as she gazed up at him. “I… thought I had annoyed you? You were happy?” 

“I don’t think you understand how fucking happy the simplest things make me. I thought I had lost you, Koge. I didn’t think I was going to be able to find you again… So I treasure fucking everything. Every little touch and kiss. You’re my world. You know that.” Bakugou pressed his forehead against hers tenderly, careful of the jewelry they wore. “You make me feel things I never thought I could feel. If I had even the slightest doubt in you - in us - then things would be different. But here I am, married to your little halfling ass, because I love you. And I sure as hell am not going to give up on you.” 

Hiccupping as she tried to contain her emotions, Koge wrapped her arms around his neck, pushing herself up onto her tiptoes to hug him tightly. Though, she didn’t have to support herself much as Bakugou returned the affection, his arms around her petite torso and hands caressing her body to hold her close. As he did, a deep, low rumbling began in his chest, immediately bringing forth a matching sound from Koge, whose tail began to sway back and forth in happiness. 

“Aw Katsuki…” Koge sniffled, nuzzling her face into his neck. “You’re purring again! I thought it was just a fluke during the ceremony but… You really can purr.” 

“I think you bring out the dragon in me, Koge. First the growling and the stronger magic… Now I’m purring like a fucking whelp. Mm, maybe we will be able to mate properly one day when you’re ready.” He gave the skin of her neck a teasing light nibble, immediately bringing a soft giggle from her lips as she pressed herself in closer to him, her tail wrapping back around their hips. 

“Maybe I’ll be ready by your first rut, which will probably come around my first heat. I… really do miss being intimate with you, Katsuki… I’m sorry-” 

“Don’t apologize. You have nothing to apologize for.” 

Releasing him and falling to stand normally, Koge caught his gaze, her cheeks immediately flushing with the calmness of his expression. His usually stern brow had not a single crease, and just looking at him flooded her with such a strong sense of calmness that she felt as if all her fears and worries would flutter away off her shoulders. She wished they would, so she could feel as close to him as she had before, but her demons were persistent. Bakugou was, too, and she knew that he wouldn’t stop until he had chased away every single nasty little imp. “You’re right… You want to know something?” 

“Hm?” Bakugou’s response was quiet as his hands caressed her cheeks again, his crimson gaze scanning every inch of her face as if he were in a trace. Koge couldn’t resist a smile, her hands resting tenderly over his. 

“I used to dream about this… Standing in the moonlight with the person I loved. Almost every night, way before you were even alive… I spent such a long time alone that I figured it was just something that I was picturing to feel better. But this is really exactly what I used to dream of… Something that I never thought I’d have.” 

“I never thought I’d have this, either. I thought it was all lost… My homeland. You. But now I have everything. We have everything. And I’ll give you anything you want. I’ll protect you. Forever.” Another soft and passionate kiss was shared, with Koge resting her body against him as a soft purr echoed from her chest. Though, the sentimental moment was shattered by the call of a familiar voice, making Koge jump as she hadn’t noticed his scent over the smell of the flowers. 

“Hey! There you two are! I got worried, why’d you come all the way out here?” Kirishima jogged towards them, coming to a stop a few feet away to still allow them privacy, his reflective keen eyes immediately noticing the clothes resting on the grass. “Oh, wait- are you two-? Like-” 

“No!” Bakugou barked, wrapping his arms back around Koge tightly enough to make her squeak. “We just wanted some air from the party!” 

“Oooh, did I make you a little winded with our dance, Koge?” Kirishima grinned, calming down from his mild protective panic. “You missed your slow dance! People are asking for you, too. Want me to tell them what’s up?” 

“No, no,” Koge peeked up over Bakugou’s bicep, placing her hands tenderly on his sides. “I enjoyed our dance! But I did need some air. We’re ready to go back, though?” She looked up at Bakugou, who seemed reluctant to agree. Still, he gave a sigh and a nod in agreement, giving a flick of his wrist to command his friend away. 

“Fine! We’ll be back in a minute!”

“No worries! I’ll just let them know that you stepped out for a bit and you’ll be back! You two have fun under the sun- er, I mean, moon!” 

Koge giggled softly as Bakugou groaned in agony of his friend’s idiocy, hiding his face in Koge’s shoulder once Kirishima was out of earshot. “Fuck, I swear, having this new form has just made me realize how stupid he’s always been. It was so much more tolerable when he couldn’t talk.” 

“Aw, he’s just concerned, it’s okay. Honestly, I can see how he’d make that mistake, for us it’s very bright out here. Night and day aren’t all that different. Ready to go back?” 

Releasing a heavy sigh, Bakugou stood back up straight, caressing her sides gently. “I guess we should. I just love being alone with you.” 

“Me too, Katsuki.” Koge smiled, leaning forward to place a soft kiss on his chest. “But you know what?” 

“Hm?” 

“We have our whole lives to make time to be alone together. And I honestly can’t wait for every second. Now, my king, let’s go dance and have a little wine!” 

“You got it, my queen.”

#bnhabookclub #bakugou #bakugou x oc #bakugou katsuki #bnha #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #katsuki bakugou #bnha fanfiction #bnha scenarios #bnha imagines #bnha oc #oc #original character #bakugou x koge #koge #cutesuki-oc #cutesuki scenarios #bingo

[rollingaroundin-bread]

Yeah so sometimes you draw Perry the Platypus in the context of the ducktales universe and realize that means everyone else would be birds and stuff so you have to draw that too 

Anyways, why I made some choices under the cut! 

~

Phineas

I couldn't figure out how to give him a triangle head, my bad :(

Was originally going to make him a robin, but then I was looking for some reference 

Stumbled upon Panchito

This man has half of Phineas’s hair and when I was drawing it came out looking like a comb anyways

So yeah he’s a chicken!

Ferb

Typically in Human!Perry aus they make Perry the uncle on Ferb’s side

So I decided to stick with that and make Ferb either a duck, beaver, or platypus (ignore how that technically doesn’t work it’s fine)

Wasn’t feeling beaver, so I got to drawing and when I came time for the tail I just went duck

Plus green ducks exist and are cool so it works

Candace

You know we have to get that long neck in when it comes to Candace

So my first thought was Ostrich

My second thought was swan but I decided Ostrich made more sense to stylistically make orange

So ostrich! 

Yes I know Phineas and Candace are biologically related so it would make more sense to make them the same species

but consider, we don’t know who the father is and I didn’t draw Linda so it’s fine 

(I know I also kept all the other people who are related the same species but shh its fine)

Isabella

She just gives off hummingbird vibes guys

Plus hummingbirds can be pink

Not much to say here I do like how she turned out though!

Baljeet

I wasn’t sure what to do so I defaulted to duck

again not much to say here

Oh wait! 

When I make HDLW/others eventually interact I’ve decided Huey meats the group first!

And it’s through Baljeet because they met at some nerdy summer camp thing

Yep!

Buford

Once again I was looking for reference 

I was like, Big Time Beagle and Buford kinda look similar

See what I mean?

So yeah Buford could distantly related to the Beagle Boys?? Maybe?

I’m not sure that would be an interesting concept though

Stacy

I defaulted to duck again

Even though her neck is long too it’s different than Candace because of her head shape

so therefore she is not an ostrich

Jeremy

Jeremy’s a different story

His head shape is MUCH more like Candace

He may not have quite as long of a neck (could anyone truly have as long of a neck as Candace?)

But it’s close so he's an ostrich too

Dr. Doofenshmirtz

We all saw Dr. Atmoz Fear in that one episode

You should KNOW Doof isn't against name changes for the sake of branding

So I just drew Atmoz Fear

They even say in the wiki for Atmoz Fear that he looks like Doofenshmirtz

So it’s fine I can be lazy

Plus could I really think of a better design than him? No, no I could not.

Vanessa

Almost made her a different species but then I didn’t

Once again it just kinda turned out that way 

Ginger & Gretchen

Same as Stacy, so just a duck

then I defaulted for Gretchen too

Look I have so little to say that I combined them!

That's it! I have more for this au I'll post in a bit!

#My art stuff #Phineas and Ferb #phineas flynn #ferb fletcher #isabella garcia shapiro #baljeet tjinder #buford van stomm #dr doofenshmirtz #Doofenshmirtz #heinz doofenshmirtz #dr heinz doofenshmirtz #doctor doofenshmirtz #doctor heinz doofenshmirtz #SERIOUSLY can this man have less tags?? #atmoz fear #dr atmoz fear #doctor atmoz fear #stacy hirano #ginger hirano #jeremy johnson #gretchen #p&f #phineas & ferb #ducktales #Ducktales!Perry and co

[prettywordsyouleft]

How To Love

Summary: Brian hoped taking you out on a date would help you both connect more like most couples did. Except, with him being a ghost, going on a date proves to be harder than either of you anticipated.

Pairing: Brian Kang x reader (ft. Day6)

World: Spiritual Connection (masterlist HERE)

Genre: ghost au / angst-fluff / valentines au

Warnings: none

A/N: Happy Valentines to everyone who celebrates it! As promised at Christmas, we are returning to our beloved manor house to see how the ghosts are doing. I did want to write about them all but it appears Brian was a little needy this time around so he got a story all to himself! I hope you enjoy it.

For those new to this world, this story’s context won’t make any sense without reading the previous stories before this. They are linked in the masterlist shared above.

Word count: 6292

Placing down the book he had just completed, Brian let out his umpteenth sigh for the day. It wasn’t the book’s fault. He had read this story many times over his years of existence and usually it held his attention well.

Tonight, however, Brian was too distracted to let the words fully infiltrate his mind, his thoughts wandering towards the dilemma he was faced with.

Things at the seaside manor had been going well. In fact, business hadn’t been better. Although it hadn’t been long since Christmas break, as soon as the doors reopened, guests would come and go every week in larger volumes than before. And whilst Brian was thrilled that your bed and breakfast venture had really taken off, it had some disadvantages.

Since you were spending your Saturday evening entertaining your guests whilst he was stuck in the study alone.

Glancing down at the love story he had been attempting to read, Brian lifted his glasses to pinch the bridge of his nose. For someone who didn’t feel the same as he had when he was alive, he could still sense the weariness within his soul. He was tired of all of the distinctions between you and him, and reading about a love that held different worries than he had couldn’t ease his mind or heart.

Brian craved something more tangible to his existence. Since his death, over a century had passed by. And during that time, he hadn’t really questioned a lot about anything. Sure, he had his profound moments, inspired to write his feelings down in poetry. But that was it. He had accepted his time and place in this realm. Yet, just because he was dead, didn’t mean his emotions had died off.

Had that happened, he wouldn’t have fallen in love with you.

And it was due to the intensity of such emotions that everything felt insufferable right now.

“Here you are!” a voice called and it perked him instantly, despite it being more masculine than your tone. Turning to look in Dowoon’s direction, Brian gave his friend a curious look. “I should have known to find you inside of a book!”

“What’s up?”

“Sungjin and I are going to go walk Custard down the beach. You keen?”

Smiling lightly, Brian thought how peaceful that would be. Custard was Dowoon’s pride and joy, a dog you had got for his friend for Christmas. Brian was certain Dowoon loved his canine friend more than anyone else in this house. Custard was all too eager to spend every moment – awake or asleep – with Dowoon too.

Now I’m jealous of a dog, Brian lamented, shaking his head softly. Whilst the thought of stretching his legs and attempting to take in the salty air of the sea did sound enticing, he could already see who he wanted to do that with.

And it wasn’t Dowoon, Custard or Sungjin, sadly.

“Maybe another time.”

“Alright, suit yourself! Ah, if you get peckish, Sarah has made her infamous brownie for the house guests and served up the edges on a plate in the kitchen.”

Brian chuckled. “Peckish? Us dead folk don’t need to eat.”

“Doesn’t mean it isn’t a nice concept now and then,” the tall man suggested with a shrug, giving Brian a final look before departing the room.

He contemplated the idea. Brian’s thoughts shifted back to the first time he shared a drink with you when you moved into the manor house as an adult. No longer were you simply the child who grew up in this house each summer when visiting Pearl, your grandmother. You had arrived and stirred a lot more than the dust and bric-a-brac left behind with her passing. Brian found himself smiling at the many times after you had both shared a meal together.

Maybe, Dowoon was right.

Pushing back his chair, Brian made his way out of the study and down to the kitchen, stopping in the threshold when he overheard the conversation between the occupants of the room.

“Shh! What if someone hears you talking? It will look like you’re talking to yourself!”

“Wonpil, don’t be so silly! Everyone’s being entertained in the main living room right now. We’re completely alone down here.”

“You make it sound as if you like that idea,” his friend mentioned and Brian cleared his throat noisily, his bitterness overshadowing any guilt he felt at breaking up the couple’s alone time. Wonpil, clutching his heart, heaved a little with his fright. “You could have given us fair warning!”

“Why? Your heart won’t jump out of your chest with a little scare,” Brian remarked, reaching for a piece of brownie on the table. He held it up and smiled. “I was told to come for this.”

“Yes, but Sarah’s heart could and as much as that could simplify things, I’d much rather she live out a full life until she joins us in the afterlife.”

The only living human in the room swatted a bashful hand out at Wonpil. “Stop it!”

“I won’t! You are special to me how you are!”

And that signalled Brian’s departure from the kitchen, unsure if the brooding overwhelming him stemmed from the fact that he couldn’t really taste the chocolatey goodness of the treat within his hand that he nibbled on, or because he had to agree with Wonpil to some extent.

If you weren’t just like Sarah, someone who possessed a beating heart, that would simplify things. You would be on a level playing field. Brian knew nothing was ever truly equal in relationships – dead or alive. Still, it would mean you wouldn’t be doing everything so separately. He couldn’t help you run the guest house. He wasn’t able to assist you with your guests like Sarah could. Of course, he did his fair share around the manor where he could, and you were always grateful for that. But it didn’t change the fact that if he walked into the living room right now, only you would see him. Further, you couldn’t interact with him other than in subtle ways that wouldn’t bring attention to the living.

Sensing movement by the front door that he had mindlessly wandered towards, he gave a small smile to Jae who was slipping into his jacket.

“Oh bro! Had enough of the books?”

Shrugging loosely, Brian rocked back on his heels. “What are you up to? Do you want-”

Jae tipped his head to the side as he brushed down the collar to his jacket and then grinned. “Me? It’s date night.”

“A-Again?” Brian breathed incredulously and his friend nodded.

“You know how it is. Married life is all about making sure you keep things fresh and healthy. Date night is a part of that.”

Swallowing down a bitter curse that he, in fact, did not know how any of it was, Brian smiled again, albeit more strained this time. “Where are you going?”

“Downtown theatre.”

“Aren't they only showing Little Women right now? You saw that last week.”

“Gotta keep the Mrs happy, Brian,” Jae announced and then smiled as his Mrs, also known as Becky, came into view.

Her ruby lips twisted up with disdain. “I heard you.”

“I know you did and that was why I kept my talk decent,” Jae quipped, leading his wife out the front door of the manor house with a hasty farewell wave to Brian as he left him behind.

Brian sighed heavily once the pair had gone. Even if they bickered more often than not, he was jealous of them. At least, they prioritised having a date night.

Had he ever gone out on a date with you? Sure, he spent most of his time in your company. You would wake up together, run errands in town or the closest city, sometimes walking along the beach like the others were right now. On the odd occasion, if you didn’t pass out early from exhaustion from running the bed and breakfast, you would curl up in his arms and catch up or read books together. Eventually though, you would fall asleep and a new day would arrive just like that.

Time never had much value to him until he started being with you. It felt like there was never enough of it, moments stolen in between house chores and setting up for new arrivals.

The longer he went through the catalogue of his moments with you in his mind, he realised he had never gone out of his way to call anything a date. Glancing at the large event board by the coat closet, he moved closer to inspect the decorated part of the calendar, indicating that Valentine’s Day was just around the corner. Smiling, he finished his piece of brownie with more enthusiasm before clapping his hands together.

He knew what he had to do.

You smiled brightly when you felt arms slip around your waist from behind you, instinctively leaning back and allowing Brian to step in closer. You nuzzled into him briefly. “Well hello, handsome.”

“What are you doing?”

“What does it look like?” You gestured to the various hues of pink and red that you were using to decorate the living room. “It’s the month of love.”

“The month of love?” he echoed, chuckling softly. “I thought Valentine’s was only a day in February. One in which, I’m certain I heard you proclaim was not your cup of tea.”

Turning around in his arms, Brian grinned at your expression. You scrunched your nose up further. “If I’m honest, it is really cliché. I mean, you should show your partner that you love them every day, right?”

He didn’t answer, simply staring back at you and hoping that you could feel what he did deep down. Brian never questioned your love for him. He just wished you realised how you prioritised him in your schedule.

And how little lately.

“However, from a business standpoint, Valentine’s is the perfect time to whisk your loved one off somewhere to have a little rendezvous. We’re completely booked out for the entire week that Valentine’s falls on.”

Brian’s mood dampened. “Really? You didn’t plan to have even one day off?”

“Now why would I do that?” you questioned, moving away from him to return to your decorations.

“Because you did during Christmas.”

You laughed and shot him a look. “There’s a huge difference between both events. Besides, we had a Christmas wedding to plan for.”

“Would it take another wedding for you to take time off again?” he wondered with a heavy breath and you stopped hanging the balloons, turning back to him.

“Are you okay?”

“I was hoping we could have some time together that week. A whole day, actually.”

You cocked your head to the side, intrigued. “Why?”

“Do you know we’ve never gone on an actual date, Y/N?”

“We haven’t?” Brian shook his head and you fell silent.

“Becky and Jae go on one almost every week.”

“That’s because they can.”

“Why can’t we?” he asked, a little hurt by your response. You could tell and swallowed slowly. “Because I’m not alive?”

“No, it’s nothing like that,” you mumbled, guilt washing over you. “Not at all. Hey! We do things together all the time! We just went to the city together last week.”

“To pick up plant boxes for the vegetable patch.”

“It was fun though. And it was just you and me.”

Brian sighed. “I meant, intentional time together. I want to do things with you like a proper couple does.”

“Can we do that?” you breathed and immediately shook your hands to dismiss your doubt. “Of course we can. We will!”

“You’ll give me one day of your time?”

“How about the day before Valentine’s?” you offered and Brian began to smile. You, however, looked stressed. “I’ll just ask Sarah to step up a bit whilst we’re gone. We will have the best date ever!”

He should have known with your hesitance that this date of yours would be a disaster.

Still, when you met him out in the foyer by the front door, Brian felt hopeful. You had put in some effort to how you looked; wearing one of the dresses he knew you had dug out of your grandmother’s wardrobe. It looked perfect on you and with a hooked arm extended out to you, Brian allowed you to curl a hand around it before leading the way out to the car.

For the trip to the city, you were both excited. Conversation flowed freely as did a lot of singing. He could see how affected you were after he sang along to a Michael Buble song on the radio, the hand he had held the whole trip growing a little clammy. It satisfied Brian to know he had charms about him still.

But it all turned pear-shaped when you pulled up at the restaurant you had made a reservation at. The maître d looked at you and then frowned. “Is your lunch partner running late?”

“What? No,” you answered, smiling at Brian and then swallowing down your easy reaction. Brian stiffened at your side. “Oh. Yes, they are.”

“I’m afraid right now we’re really busy and so we’ll have to seat you up at the bar. We’ll be able to find you a table when you’re ready.”

“Can’t I just be seated at a table for two regardless?”

He shook his head at your request. “Sorry, it’s our restaurant’s rules.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Brian breathed into your ear but you shook your head subtlety.

“I’ll just go somewhere else,” you announced, turning on your heel and hurrying back out to the car.

Brian stared at you when he was seated next to you again. Your cheeks were red and he could tell it wasn’t only with annoyance. He caressed your face softly. “I didn’t think that would be a rule in a restaurant.”

“It’s fine. We’ll still eat together, Brian. Who needs to go to a restaurant like that? Even though I look like this, I can eat anywhere!”

You both ended up in the food court, your determination now tapered out as you sat across from him staring down at your sushi. The noise within the eatery was louder than the ambience at your first stop and Brian pushed down his disappointment.

This wasn’t where he wanted to take you out to eat today.

“It’s fine,” you mentioned again when you caught his gaze, smiling for his benefit. “I love sushi.”

“I know you do.”

“What’s next on the list after eating?” you asked and Brian reached out for your hand, giving it a gentle squeeze.

“I thought we could go to the museum together.”

You brightened. “I haven’t been in years.”

“It’ll be fun. You love old things,” he commented and you slyly grinned at him whilst nodding.

“You know, I really do.”

With your lunch eaten, you got back in the car to head to the museum together. A renewed energy stepped between you both as you began to look around, Brian swinging your hand in his gently as you walked around.

“Oh look!” you exclaimed, dragging him over to the Victorian section. You lit up as you inspected a selection of men’s outfits. Looking at Brian and then back at the mannequins, you giggled. “Are any of these looks for you?”

“I wouldn’t be caught dead in number three,” he breathed and you giggled. Looking towards the casual outfit on the end, Brian pointed. “That was more like me.”

“Oh, now that is very you!” you exclaimed, looking at his modern outfit and then back at what was once the type of clothes he wore. “Maybe you should try them on again?”

“I’d rather stay like this,” he announced quickly, pulling you away from the display.

For the following hour, it felt as close as it could to a date for Brian. Of course, there were a couple of instances where other viewers would step too close to him and he’d have to sidestep away quickly to avoid being walked through. Still, he was having a lot of fun and he could tell you were as well.

Yet, Brian had become aware of a small group that had been following you both around the museum, and more so of their stares in your direction.

“Who is she talking to?”

“She’s weird, don’t look at her.”

Brian attempted to ignore the jeers from them for some time before he let out a sigh, stepping in front of you with a weak smile. You placed a hand on his torso affectionately. “Hm? What’s wrong?”

“Pull out your phone.”

“It’s already in my hand,” you pointed out, now confused. “I’ve been taking photos!”

“I mean, pull it up to your ear. Do you have your earbuds? Maybe put one in.”

You slowly looked around yourself, realising what he was referring to. Brian closed his eyes to maintain his emotions, hating that you were now aware of the people whispering and looking. He wondered if it would have been better to leave you oblivious to it all.

Forcibly smiling, you pulled out your earbuds and angled your phone towards yourself so it looked like you were on a call. And from that moment out, the trip to the museum became subdued.

“Let’s forgo the gift shop and head back to the car, hm?” he offered when you had made your way back around to the exit, your head lowered in defeat. Brian rubbed your arms softly. “We can go and-”

“I want to find something to remember this outing by,” you mumbled, stepping away from him and going into the gift store. It took a few minutes for your head to lift back up to a level you could maintain without feeling uncomfortable. He could see in your eyes that you were trying to salvage the trip here. Stepping over to your side, he pointed at an arrangement of keyrings with the museum’s logo on it.

“What about one of those?”

You shook your head. “Anyone could have one of them. I want something more us.”

It was a slow process of finding something that you liked. A couple of times you got excited over an item and turned to show him it, only to stop mid-way and cast your gaze around the tiny shop to see if anyone was watching.

It was a keyring and magnet that you eventually settled on, your mood had fallen to a level that he felt he couldn’t retrieve it from. Still, Brian attempted to. “Do you want to go shopping? I’m sure we could cheer up looking at stores together.”

“I do need to get a couple of things from the mall,” you agreed quietly, driving the car to the closest one. With yourself fully armed this time from the start, you relaxed into your experience at the mall. You had done this many times together and perhaps that was why you seemed to grow your confidence again.

“Oh, let’s look in here!” you exclaimed, walking hastily towards a jewellery store. As you browsed, Brian lingered at your side, trying not to take much notice of the items. He didn’t know how to act within such a place. Of course, he wanted to take a deeper look at everything they had in stock. Although he might be a little outdated, even back in his times, he knew the importance of a fine gemstone on a necklace or ring. It made him uncomfortable because he wanted nothing more than to find something for you.

“Anything caught your eye?” you murmured when you looked back at him and Brian shrugged. Smiling, you grabbed his hand and pulled him towards the display boxes. Everything was so sparkly; it took him several blinks to actually focus on anything. You squeezed his hand before letting go, wandering around the store whilst he remained where you placed him.

Brian’s eyes were stuck on a delicate pendant. It held a blue stone within its centre, the metal surrounding it linked in a unique way to hold it together. He decided it reminded him of his love for you.

Brian didn’t even realise he was crying until he felt his cheeks were wet. You approached him calmly, peering at what caught his eye. “It’s gorgeous.”

“It is.”

“Blue topaz is your birthstone too, did you know that?”

He hadn’t but there was no way he could reply, overwhelmed by the pure need for the necklace. His eyes travelled to the price tag and sighed.

A ghost couldn’t exactly purchase anything.

“Excuse me,” you called out and Brian turned to stare at you, somewhat disconnected in the moment. He didn’t hear the rest of your sentence, but when the necklace was taken from the display and you stepped away from his side, he knew what you had done. Walking out of the store, he ran a frustrated hand through his hair, collecting himself when you bounced up to his side and waggled the gift bag. “Here you go! Ah, I’ll carry for you until we’re back at the car!”

“Why did you do that?”

You beamed at him. “Because I could see what it meant to you.”

“I wanted to get it for you,” he explained and your smile evaporated. “I can’t even get you a god damn gift!”

“Brian,” you started but he shook his head, storming away from you and going back out to the car. He laughed bitterly when he was able to slip inside without you unlocking it. Because he wasn’t bound to the same world as you were. Although he could touch you and all the things that your realm held, he wouldn’t ever truly exist in it.

This date had been the worst idea he could ever have. It highlighted all his fears. Inside the manor house, you never seemed unattainable, apart from your endless working hours. But stepping out of the house he had stayed close to for the last century and trying to do something that normal people did had been foolish. Jae and Becky were an anomaly. Brian had learned today that dating was only for people who both either had hearts that moved or had turned to dust years ago.

Brian was in the study again, this time no book was held within his grip. Instead, you had left him with the small gift bag and headed into your bedroom, locking the door behind you, your tears muffled as he had listened on until he couldn’t take it any longer.

Looking down at the velvet case on the table, Brian snapped the lid open and stared at the necklace you had bought in his stead. He closed the lid with a sigh, only to open it again, repeating his actions even though they were taking quite a toll on his energy levels. He hadn’t expected going out on a date with you to be so exhausting.

No wonder Jae always crashed the day after his outings with Becky.

The door to the study opened and closed, though Brian had no interest in tearing his gaze away from the jewellery box before him. He blinked when a hand picked it up and a low whistle left the man before him. Sungjin then chuckled. “Wow, this is real nice.”

Brian gave no response, though his fingers reached out to touch the velvet once it was back on the table.

“Did you steal it?”

“That would take a lot of energy though perhaps I would feel more at ease had I.”

Sungjin chuckled softly. “No, it wouldn’t make you feel any better. And Y/N would have felt bad too. It’s best to do things in their realm the legal way.”

“Did … did you steal something?” Brian asked, glancing up and seeing the answer in Sungjin’s face. He gaped at his friend. “What was it?”

“A brooch,” he admitted, toying with the stack of books on the edge of the desk.

Brian sucked in a dramatic breath when he realised it was the one Pearl had worn all the time. “That brooch? I thought Pearl bought it!”

“My pride was knocked around from that ordeal. It sucks having to step back when it comes to dating though, huh?”

Brian nodded glumly. “I wanted to drive the car.”

“And hold open the doors?” Sungjin offered in which his friend agreed to with another nod.

“I wanted to make Y/N feel special and enjoy herself. Instead, all we did was constantly remind one another of our differences.”

“The only true difference you both have are that you were born over a century and a half ago and Y/N is from this time we’re existing in now. Your morals will be outdated in her world.”

“Hardly, there’s more and you know it.”

Sungjin shrugged, though his gaze was less nonchalant. “There’s only more if you allow them to be there. Why focus on the unimportant stuff?”

“Sungjin, the fact that I’m dead and Y/N’s not is kind of important.”

“Is it? I wasted far too many years of Pearl’s life thinking just like that, you know. To her, all she cared about was her feelings for me and mine of hers. All couples have to learn to compromise and accept how the other is. You’ve been doing that all along. Before this desire of yours to be more than you are, you were working well together, Brian.”

“Were we? I felt like I never did anything with her,” Brian lamented and his friend moved around the desk to pat him on the shoulder.

“So tell Y/N that, not me. You didn’t need to go all out on some fancy date to let her know what’s really been bothering you.”

“Is this how Y/N feels after talking with you?” he breathed as he got to his feet and Sungjin grinned.

“Hey, I have a lot of experience with this kind of thing. It took me a damn long time to get here though. I don’t want to see either of you spend decades stuck in the wrong situation like I did with Pearl.”

“I wouldn’t let even a year pass by being away from Y/N,” Brian replied and Sungjin clapped him on the back.

“See, you’re already ahead of me. Now, how about you go let her know how you’ve been feeling!”

You were already asleep when Brian quietly entered your bedroom, slipping into the bed tentatively. When he had been alive, he had dated briefly and so the only arguments he had experienced were with those of his friends and family. Now in his afterlife, you had been his first true love. He didn’t know what was practical to do within the delicate situation afterwards, no matter how many relationships he had studied within novels over the decades. He laid still beside you, chewing on his lip until your body shifted closer, your arm soon flung over him. Brian reached for your hand gently, drawing it up to his chest and placing it there instead.

He knew when the morning arrived that he would tell you everything. Until then, he would enjoy the proximity you sought after as you dreamed, your body now pressed into him at multiple spots.

Despite his lack of actual sleep, Brian felt well-rested when you finally opened your eyes. And he smiled when you didn’t move away from him when you realised how curled up you were next to him.

“Morning.”

“Hi,” you breathed, swallowing visibly. “Brian, I’m sorry-”

“Can I go first?” he interrupted, smiling at you more warmly. He reached out to brush some of your hair away from your face. “I’ve been waiting all night long to tell you how I feel and I don’t think I can wait any longer.”

“Did you not sleep?” He shook his head softly and you gasped. “Brian! You should have woken me up so you could get some sleep after talking!”

“I don’t need to sleep every night, remember?”

“Still,” you mumbled, pouting for effect.

“Can I tell you my thoughts?” he asked and you nodded softly, your gaze not leaving his. Brian smiled, reminding himself to actually start talking instead of admiring the way you respected that he needed to talk. He felt foolish for a fleeting moment.

He knew he could have told you all this before and you would have listened at any stage.

“I took you out on that date yesterday because I had convinced myself that was what was missing from us. I saw everyone around us doing their own thing with those that matter the most to them and believed that to do that with you too, I needed to step up, to do more couple focused events.”

“I did enjoy the concept of going out with you, Brian.”

“I know,” he told you, reaching out to cup your cheek in his hand, his thumb gently running along your skin. “And in the future, I hope we can do other things together out of the house. But the real reason for my attempt is that I stopped valuing my place here with you,”

You frowned. “What do you mean? You are everything to me!”

“So is your business,” he pointed out, sighing when your brows knitted together. “I started to feel it was easier to focus on the living as opposed to me because their needs are more visible here.”

Touching his neck with your hand, you smiled. “You’re visible to me too. But I do understand, I think. Things have been really busy when people started asking for longer stays and I went from working a certain amount of days to seven days a week.”

“Are you tired?”

You nodded. “I thought I had to prove more of myself with running the bed and breakfast. I got greedy from my success. Even when I was tired, I was consumed with doing better.”

“I wish I could help you with it and that we could run this together. But my place here doesn’t stand out as much as yours.”

“Really? You’re my favourite to talk about around the fireplace. A lot of people leave here charmed by this mysterious man they have seen the portrait of in the hallway. Don’t tell the others but you’re a crowd favourite. Must be these handsome looks of yours.”

Brian smirked. “I think it’s all down to how much you talk me up.”

“You know, it’s not the same, but I hope you know you’re welcome in the room during the times when I’m entertaining. You’ve shared your stories with me in the past and I relay them. But you could be there to help me with them. And in return, I’ll try to find balance with how much I let this place overrun me. As much as I love sharing my joy for the manor, all the people who live here are the true reason this house is magical to me. You are my longest friend, Brian. Before all this-”

You gestured between you both with a proud smile before continuing. “-you and the others were my five childhood friends who I felt safe around. I still feel safe here and I don’t believe I’m missing out on anything just because I can’t go eat in a fancy restaurant with you. I’d much rather cook together here.”

“Do you know I adore how honest you are?” he wondered, moving to rest his forehead on yours. “Here I was withholding my feelings because I worried we weren’t real enough.”

“Oh, we’re real, Brian. I realised yesterday on the trip home that I was more embarrassed with myself than I was with our unique relationship. I don’t need approval from anyone but myself to love you.”

“If you could choose to wait for a lifetime where we’re alive together or keep what we have now, even with its differences, would you still choose now?”

You nodded immediately and his heart soared. “Of course. Besides, you promised along with Jae, Dowoon, Wonpil and Sungjin that you’d stay with me here until I’m joining you all over in the afterlife. This is just the entrée to our love together.”

“Are you hungry? You keep talking about food,” he asked with a chuckle and you giggled, nodding.

“I want to go make pancakes.”

“Why pancakes?”

“Well, it’s a special day for a lot of our guests but more so for us.”

“It is?”

You nodded. “Don’t you remember one year where I stayed here as a kid because my parents had to go on a business trip and my grandmother was unwell so you five all stood over the stovetop attempting to make a batch of pancakes for me to eat?”

“You remember that? God, I have all the time in the world to replay my existence and yet you recall that far more easily than I would. Was that Valentines Day?”

You nodded, pulling away from him and padding across your room to a familiar book on your shelf, slipping something out of it. Coming back over to the bed, you crawled to his side and handed over the card. Brian chuckled as he opened it. “You still have this?”

“You were my first Valentine.”

“I thought you didn’t believe in today?”

“I believe love should be shown every day, I’ve admitted that. But I do believe in this day. Not for the reason a lot of others do, just for the fact that it makes me think of you all.”

Brian leaned in to kiss you before brushing your hair away from your face. “You were my first Valentine too.”

“I doubt it. I bet you had ladies lining up for your hand. Look at you! So charming that even the mistresses of the house you served no doubt harboured feelings for you!”

“Are you jealous if they did?” he wondered, following you as you got up from the bed and headed out into the hallway, taking the path to the kitchen. Since it was early, none of the guests were out of their rooms yet.

You shot Brian a look. “Why be jealous when I have you now!”

“Who’s jealous?” Jae enquired when you both arrived in the kitchen, Brian surprised by the full turn out. Aside from Sarah who hadn’t stayed at the manor last night, the full-time residents were all seated at the table in the room.

“I am!” Sungjin proclaimed, pointing to everyone in the room. “Pearl can’t come to visit any time soon like she did over Christmas. Look at all these couples around me.”

Wonpil shook his head. “My love isn’t here yet.”

“Love? So it’s to that point already?” Becky breathed in amazement, clasping her friend’s hand in hers. And then she turned to you. “Y/N, is there a reason you wanted us all here today?”

“It’s pancake day,” you announced and went to retrieve two boxes of premixed pancake mix from the cupboard.

Dowoon grinned and stopped rubbing his dog’s tummy. “You really trust us to make these?”

“I think we’ll be tempting fate again,” Jae agreed, shuddering as Becky stared at her husband in confusion. Jae sighed heavily. “We were in charge of feeding Y/N one year when Pearl was unwell. It took us forty minutes to serve up the world’s worst breakfast.”

“It was my favourite breakfast,” you corrected, handing a box to Sungjin and Wonpil each. “And it’s Valentines. Can’t we all have some time together before I go make my guests feel the magic in the air or whatever it is?”

It was chaotic, to say the least. Still, after all the years that had passed, none of them had mastered the art of cooking in your realm. It wasn’t as if they truly needed to, given spirits didn’t need food to sustain themselves like you did. But thankfully this time, Becky was here and she managed to deter Jae from putting too much batter onto the pan at a time.

Watching everyone with a smile on his face, Brian quietly left the room to retrieve the necklace from the study, taking it out of the velvet box and marvelling at it as he carried it back to the kitchen. It would take him some time to fully accept his pride would be knocked about in this relationship. He decided he would attempt to make you things in the future when wanting to give you a proper gift. Still, he knew that this came from him despite how it fell into his hands.

And when Brian saw you again, he didn’t hesitate to sling it around your neck, doing up the clasp to the chain. You turned and slipped your arms around his waist. “I love you, Brian.”

“I love you too.”

“Hey, Valentine’s is for us all right?” Dowoon exclaimed and clapped his hands together. “I love you all! But I love Custard justttt a bit more.”

“Just a bit? I’m offended.”

“Jae, do you love me more than everyone here or not?” Becky offered with a smile and he chuckled.

“No, I love everyone more than you.”

“Hey!”

And just like that, the room filled with laughter and exclamations, much like it always did when you all were together.

And as Brian held your hand within his, he realised that he liked Valentine’s a whole lot more than he ever had. It wasn’t about being the perfect date. Or having the best relationship either. Even though he had new ideas and couldn’t wait to spend more alone time with you.

But for now, he was surrounded by everyone he adored. And if Valentine’s was the day of love, then he knew he would be full from this year’s one.

_________________

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[xxgoblin-dumplingxx]

Sick Little Games: Fourteen

“Don’t fall,” Clint called up, a laugh threatening.

“Shh,” you tell him, holding up a hand, edging closer to the edge of the branch, “I can see it.”

“Are they taking the hobbits to Isengard?” Tony drawls. 

“I thought I was Legolas?” Clint snorted.

“She’s white-blonde right now,” Tony said.

“Shut up,” you hiss, “You’re scaring her!”

Clint gets quiet, getting anxious as you edge steadily closer to the little black cat shivering on the branch. He’s obviously a house kitty. One that isn’t meant to be outside. One that was running from the big scary metal man. He can’t hear you, but he knows what you sound like. The gentle voice coaxing her closer with an offering of some lunch meat. 

You coax her gently, and she creeps closer, taking the offered tidbits. Clint isn’t sure if it’s the treats or you that draws her in, but, as you cradle her carefully in one arm and climb down, he doesn’t really care.

All he knows is that when you look up at him with big eyes and a sweet smile, asking if you can keep her, Tony can’t tell you no.

You cuddle her happily and beam up at both of them, and Tony doesn’t bother to hide his amusement when Clint visibly softens. “God,” he snorts, “You’re really a goner. You don’t even like cats.”

“I’m gonna like that one,” he laughs, “ ‘specially if it gets me my damn dog back.” You’re telling Lucky to be helpful to the new ‘baby’ and asking if he wanted to share his bed or if they needed to get a new one. 

Honestly, Clint didn’t care that Lucky liked you so much. It was sweet. And he wanted coming home from missions to his girl and his dog both waiting to smother him in love. And he liked Racing with Lucky to be the first one to give you welcome home kisses. 

“You’re getting lame, Barton,” Tony said, shaking his head, “Are you sure she didn’t slip you a love potion?”

“The bigger question is, do I care if she did it?” He strolled across the grass to follow you. He sensed a trip to the store in his future. And that was always a treat. Even if it meant treating you to ice cream. He didn’t expect to see you frozen in the lobby. Feet rooted to the spot, looking both horrified and hopeful. To stunned to even cry.

There are a middle-aged woman and another middle-aged man. Both looking around in a state of awe. Thor is hovering nearby, looking apprehensive. You look from him to the couple feeling like you can’t breathe, “Thor, what the fuck?”

“They were insistent that they knew you, Lady,” he says tentatively. 

“They did, once,” you answer, taking a step backward reflexively.

“We saw you one the news,” The woman said, reaching forward.

Thor situates himself between you and them calmly, insinuating himself to keep them from starting towards you. Clint puts an arm around your shoulder gently, “Baby,” he murmurs, “You don’t have to do this now.” 

He doesn’t know who these people are, but he knows you. He knows that you’re incredibly confused and upset. “Sweetheart,” the woman says, “I missed you so much. Please.”

“Then why did you tell everyone I was dead?” you say softly, your voice dangerous. The only thing keeping you calm is the kitten in your arm, who’s already scared. 

“Y/N, be reasonable,” the man says, his voice oily. Reminding Clint of a used car salesman or a B- tier villain on a Saturday morning cartoon.

“You,” Clint says, taking a step forward, “Aren’t going to talk to her.” Something about this man just... it triggers him. It’s the way he casually dismisses your upset. The way he looks at you as prey. The way you shivered when he spoke. The way you’re trying not to show emotion. Shut down. Going into the survival mode that kept you alive. He hates it. He hates that man. And he isn’t going to talk to you. He doesn’t deserve to talk to you.

“Young man,-” he starts, puffing himself up. But nothing could stop the forward momentum of Clint’s fist. It connected with the man’s jaw and sent him sprawling. You gasped, having some sort of silent panic attack. Not sure who to help or what to do, and you sink to the floor in a complete state of overload. The man, Stirling, Clint Recalls. Stirling Cole. Your stepfather hauled himself slowly into a sitting position with the help of your mother and gave you a look. A look that clearly suggested that even though you hadn’t hit him, it was all your fault that he’d been laid out. 

“Harlot,” he spat, “Whore. Repent now before it’s too la-”

Thor hauled him to his feet with a growl, “The Lady is just that. A Lady. You will speak to her as such, or I will ensure you never speak again by cutting your miserable tongue from your head.”

It’s all a blur for you. Security. The boys stepping to your defense. Tony Stepping into disaster management mode. All you can focus on is the tiny cat in your arms. She’s so small and fluffy. Her big gold eyes and fluffy tail make you happy. And she’s currently looking up at you with confusion. “It’s okay, baby,” you soothe, introducing her quietly to Lucky, “Lucky is a good boy. Hims, a perfect boy. He’ll show you who to beg treats from.”

Clint stays close until they’re gone. Arms folded. He’ll gladly play muscle to give you some time to process. Or decide not to process, wherever you are with things right now. But when they’re escorted out, and Clint turns around, his heart unclenches slowly.

Lucky is lying on his belly, legs splayed out, and his head on your lap as his tail wiggled his bottom, and the Kitten, as yet unnamed, is creeping forward to investigate the large yellow dog that is desperately trying to be her friend. He kneels down in front of you and tilts your chin up gently, “You okay?” he asked softly.

“I don’t know,” you answer quietly.

“Well,” he says gently, cupping your cheek in his hand, “Lets load up the kids and go to town, huh?”

“Okay,” you murmur, kissing his palm when you turn your head. 

“Our new baby needs stuff... And Lucky probably needs some things to chew so he doesn’t think we love him less.” He gives you a crooked smile and kisses your nose, feeling a little better when you give him an uncertain smile. He helps you to your feet and you stop in front of Thor.

“Thank you,” you tell him quietly. 

Thor bends down and kisses your cheek, not really sure what to say and gives Clint a nod of approval. The Archer had stepped in and it had given Thor a little bit more context. He was, justly, very protective of his lady and any perceived threat was met with quick action. Particularly when it was a threat to the state of her heart. 

He watched Clint escort you to the motor pool. An arm around your shoulder on one side and his faithful hound sticking close to your other side. The both of them trying in their bumbling way to bring you back to yourself. To remind you that they love you. 

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@lancsnerd, @thorfanficwriter @blameitonthecauseway @etherealwaifgoddess, @stevieang, @beautybyfire, @sunmoonandbucky @mrsfox79, @bbmommy0902, @mendes-fan, @iheartsebastianstan, @wtfcas @pinknerdpanda, @process-pending, @ladifreakingda, @leasly, @coldbookworm, @hv-chw3, @past-perfect-future-tense, @starkrobb @beardburnsupersoldiers, @petlaufeyson, @queenoftheunderdark, @potatoheadthewise, @thehyperactiveteen, @thefridgeismybestie, @boyett514, @an-awkward-human-1, @sunshine-and-riverwater

[chasseurdeloup-retired]

Eye Spy || Winston, Orion, Nell, Sera, and Kaden

LOCATION: Dark Score Lake PARTIES: @danetobelieve, @3starsquinn, @nelllraiser,  @thelittlemerdermaid, and @chasseurdeloup SUMMARY: Research recon gone wrong. Cults are for dolts.

Winston gripped the steering wheel for a second before swinging themselves out of their car and closing the door quietly with a dull thud behind them. Looking over to Rio and Nell, they inclined their head towards the point that they had agreed that they would be meeting Kaden. They were glad that Nell was here because she was good with magic and they were glad that Rio was here because although they weren’t a hunter HUNTER they were a hunter biologically and should anything go on Winston would be glad for any help they got. “We should hurry up,” Winston glanced at their watch, they’d agreed to meet at midnight and that was two minutes away, “we will be late if we leave things too much longer and I want to get a better look at this with as much time as possible.” Was this a bad idea? They were potentially risking their future career on this. Heading away from the completely deserted Overlook Drive-In where Winston had stashed their shit mobile, they quickly dashed across Dark Score Lane and down towards the northern edge of the lake, hoping that Kaden would be there already.

Orion should not have come along. He knew how dangerous the place was. He also knew how useless he was. He couldn’t imagine a scenario where he was anything other than a complete burden to the group. But he could see at night and had super strength, which had to count for something, right? Even if he was too afraid to actually use it? Oh boy. “Be careful moving across. We don’t need anyone falling into the lake with the uh- giant squid thing I keep hearing about.” Orion sped himself up, popping in front of the three to try to get a lead ahead of them. He had no troubles seeing in the dark and could try to catch any traps or holes before Winston or Nell saw it. Winston may have known what Rio was, but Nell didn’t. They crept along to the meeting spot that Winston had talked to Kaden about. Rio was able to spot Kaden through the darkness pretty easily, raising his hand and giving a short wave to catch his attention. “Hey there. So… Here we are. At the creepy death lake.”

Sera knew the second she saw that official White Crest Animal Control truck drive down Dark Score Lane that her plans for the night were about to take a very not-groovy turn. “This idiot,” she mumbled under her breath, recalling how fervently  her offer of help had been turned down. In any other circumstance, she’d gleefully watch some giant squid monster munch on a group of naive humans. They seemed to be the only ones doing anything about the problem, and if they were going to go snooping around her house, they’d find it faster with her help, whether Kaden liked it or not. What she didn’t expect to see when she got there was Winston. Fuck. It’d been a few weeks since she’d seen him, and not a peep since. He either didn’t know about his delicious missing friend yet or he didn’t suspect her. All good things for her. She smiled brightly, gave a wave, and flicked the little bell on her bike as she approached to let them know someone was coming. “Don’t tell me you’re throwing a party out here and didn’t invite me, Winnie!”

Nell certainly didn’t have to be asked twice if she wanted to look into a possibly demon-esque creature in the lake, even though...she had been approached two times. Her and Kaden had got onto the subject, and then it hadn’t been long before Winston and here were talking of apparently, exactly the same thing. Orion wasn’t someone she’d spent much time with in person, but they’d had their rousing discussion about oreos online after Adam’s somnivore induced ranting. Anyone who was that passionate about such sweet goodness was alright in her books. “But what if I want to fall in the lake?” she teased Orion. “A nice little refreshing dip, right?” Her teasing grin was quickly turned to a frown as she heard the woman with the bike call out, and quickly began to size her up. Winnie was a name she thoroughly enjoyed teasing Winston with, but it was very much with the air of ‘I can make fun of them but you’re not allowed to’. “Who are you, then?” she asked before looking around to see if she could spot Kaden approaching from the animal control car.

Winston still couldn’t see Kaden, but they were sure that they couldn’t be too far off, or at least they hoped that they wouldn’t be. “You don’t want to fall into the lake, it looks cold.” Winston teased in return, no one would get a shot off at Rio without Winston responding. “Uh, Nell, Rio this is Sera, Sera these are my friends Nell and Rio….” they looked around awkwardly for a moment trying to think of the best way to say that this was their friend that they went to a rave with and did drugs alongside…. “... Sera is my friend, we uh went raving together actually. But unfortunately we’re not here for that fun reason, we’re kind of actually trying to get a look at whatever is in the lake …” they trailed off and shrugged hoping that Kaden would be around. “Have you heard from Todd recently?” Winston asked absent mindedly, they hadn’t heard anything since the initial night and the texts from their friend the next day. Winston would have to catch up with him soon. “What are you doing here by the way?”

“Hey, I got word from Sarge. You guys get a break, I’ve got this for the moment,” Kaden told the beat cops taking watch by the lake. For a moment he thought they might not believe him but a quick glance and a tired nod and they were off. He wasn’t sure how long it would be until they found out he was lying but bought this weird research crew some time, right? He hoped. Once that was taken care of, he headed towards the far side of the lake where they said they’d meet. It wasn’t long until he spotted Winston, Nell, and Flannel Kid. And apparently Sera. The benefits of hunter hearing. Guess he was going to get her assistance whether he asked for it or not. “Good. You’re all here. And then some. Apparently” His mouth pulled into a thin line as he narrowed his eyes at Sera. Too late to univinte her now. “Come on. You all going to just stand there or are we doing to get this done?” He led the way, lifting the crime scene tape for them to duck under, making sure to keep an eye out for anyone who might be watching them. Couldn’t see anyone. They were fine, right? As they walked towards the edge of the lake, he stumbled on a lump of something and a strange squish came from under his foot. He paused. When he lifted his shoe, there was what looked very much like an eyeball. Definitely worse for wear now that he fucking steppeed in it. Putain. And was that-- “Shh, wait,” he whispered to the group. “Do you hear that? It sounds like… chanting. Maybe?”

The new addition to the group came with a whole new string of risks that Orion would rather not dwell on lest he drove himself into a panic attack. He just hoped that this person knew the dangers of this place. Which seemed… a bit hard to believe considering she had ran into them here. Had she already been hanging out here? “Uh, hey Sera.” He waved shyly after Winston’s introduction and shot a nervous glance over at Nell. So Winston knew Sera. Once Kaden jogged up to the group, it seemed he knew her as well. So it was at least a bit comforting to know that Nell didn’t seem to know her either. At least Rio wasn’t the only one in the dark. Against his better judgement, he followed the group under the caution tape- a clear sign that they should be turning back. But apparently Rio was the only one who thought that. Rio froze when he heard the chanting. Nope, nope nope. Time to go right? But nobody else was moving to run away. Instead, he tried focusing out his hearing when Kaden shushed them. “It’s not English.” Rio acknowledged, trying to see if he could pick up on anything. “Not latin either.” But there was something in what they the voices kept repeating that sounded vaguely familiar. Something he had read in one of the Scribe books maybe? “They keep repeating some of the same stuff over and over again. Something about the water.” The lake, probably? He had goosebumps all over, and it felt like they were crawling along his skin. This wasn’t good.

Nell waved absently at Sera and Kaden as a greeting, not particularly enthusiastic on either account, though she might have tried a little more for the woman that Winston apparently knew. Ducking under caution tape was nothing foreign for her, though. After all, it was one of the many ways she was often brought into the White Crest police station. But seeing as Kaden was here...well— she was hoping that might count as a get out of jail free card if anything was to happen including the law. But as they grew closer to the chanting, Nell quieted and stilled, instinctively crouching a bit so as not to be too conspicuous. It only took a moment for her to recognize the language, the twisted words that many of the demons she summoned uttered, and sounds similar to those that she made when it came to bigger demon summonings. “It’s...the same language that was on the chest.” She wasn’t exactly fond of outright saying she knew a bit of the demons’ tongue, not liking to draw attention to her generally frowned upon hobby. “The one on the beach that had the eyeball in it?” Hopefully at least Kaden would get the gist. After all, she’d mentioned demons to him in the context of all this. Nevertheless, she was rather impressed Orion had managed to pick up on some of the words. Maybe that’s why Winston had decided to bring him along. “The water and…” Listening closely, her brows furrowed together as she made sense of some of the words, not liking the sound of them in the least. “...joining the bodies.”

The caution tape unnerved them but Winston pushed past their fear and hesitation and ducked underneath this. There was definitely a reason that they weren’t meant to be here, but considering they were here to try and solve that problem, well Winston was just hopeful that nothing too terrible would happen. They already had enough trouble sleeping at night and they weren’t sure that they needed to add anything else to the list of things that already troubled them. They glanced around their group nervously as they crept along the edge of the lake, fortunately they were mostly hidden behind some bushes and shrubbery. But Winston was certain that in the distance they could spot a flickering light as what seemed to be wooden torches, lit brightly illuminated the surrounding area. They weren’t nearly as proficient with the demon language but they knew that they should probably hide from people who were chanting in a voice that sounded like an angle grinder trying to sing opera. “I think we should get out of sight and see what they’re doing,” their heart was racing and a wave of nerves overwhelmed them, they felt queasy at what they were about to suggest but now wasn’t the time to allow their petty fears to rule them, “... if we are careful we can probably … follow them…?” they tried not to wince at their own words.

Sera greeted the rest of the baby faced looking crew Kaden had apparently pulled together. More than likely she was judging these books by their looks so she hoped they had some sort of hidden talents beyond social media wizardry. “Todd?” Sera raised a brow, shrugging. “Not a peep, no.” Thankfully, the subject quickly drifted back to the task at hand. She was here now and whether or not they liked it, she was part of this now. That damn chanting. So she wasn’t the only one who heard it? “This isn’t the first night they’ve been here,” she whispered, adding to the murmur of the group’s chat. Smarter than they looked, she noted. Good to know. She was careful as she approached the lake’s edge, crouching behind thick foliage to keep hidden. The moment her fingers touched the water, she felt an unrest deep within her. The chanting was rustling up every dark corner beneath the surface. “Sounds like the squid’s got some fanboys,” she murmured. Her eyes fell on something floating just behind her reach. A dead fish. Not unusual. Not comforting either. She reached for it, those bad vibes filling her with even more dread. “Anyone got a knife?”

Kaden followed behind them carefully, making sure to watch his footfalls, trying not to tip off the weird chanters. His brow furrowed as he listened to Rio and Nell explained what they were hearing. Joining bodies? That sounded bad. Very bad. He wasn’t sure what the hell Sera was doing by the water but he decided to follow. “Uh, yeah, of course I do,” he told her. His eyes narrowed at the thought of giving her one of his knives. What if she didn’t give it back? He still didn’t exactly trust her. He sighed and reached into his back pocket to get the least favorite knife he had on him, a small, plain one, and handed it to her. “What are you looking for?” It was then he noticed that the chanting had stopped. He held his breath and waited. It was not starting again. And those were footsteps in the mud coming closer. Putain. Looks like it was time to switch strategies. He stood up and pulled out his gun. “Better work quick,” he told the rest of the group. Apparently the stealth approach was gone and done. He was going to go see what was going on with this cult. He ran over to them and shouted. “Hey. Police! What are you doing here?” Sure, he was hardly police, but he used that lie for years before he was even tangentially on any kind of force. if they were normal humans, they’d scatter. If not… Well, their hands shot up, but not above their heads, they held them by their faces and opened them to reveal eyes. Yeah, normal was out the window. He started shooting.

Not that Orion should have been surprised, but the people travelling with them all seemed pretty versed in the supernatural as well. Nell in particular, who he had really only communicated with on a surface level online, seemed to know at least a bit about demonic languages which was particularly intriguing. And then Sera knew way too much about the lake for Rio’s comfort. “I don’t own a knife,” Rio lied. He owned way too many knives because of his family, but never brought them with him anywhere. He heard the chanting stop and the footsteps approaching, “Oh boy” he mumbled, his heart racing in his chest. He shouldn’t have come here. He shouldn’t have come here. On instinct alone, Rio’s arms flew up when Kaden shouted at the group before realizing it obviously hadn’t been meant for him. Rio stayed a distance away from the group of hooded figures, assessing exactly what they were and afraid of getting too involved in whatever was about to happen. When the group held their hands up to their faces, revealing eyes on their palms, Rio’s heart stopped. “Holy-” He was cut off by the sounds of gunshots, an ear splitting noise that felt like knives being stabbed directly into his ear drums. He covered his ears with his hands, stumbling backward and twisting his ankle on a dip in the ground. He fell back, unable to catch himself before plunging into the lake. The cold was an immediate prickling sensation that shot across his skin, and he began flailing his body around, trying to push himself back up to the surface. His hands kept catching onto things in the water as he swam through it, but he pushed on, trying desperately to get back to the surface. When he broke to the surface, he took a large gasp for her, shoving the water and hair from his eyes and finally looking at his hands. Tangled between his fingers were… were those eyeballs? Human eyeballs? He smacked his hands against the water, screaming his head off and trying to get them off of him, then he pushed for the land again. Please get him out of the water, please get him out of the water. Ten or so feet from the ground something caught a hold of his leg and suddenly he was under water again.

Everything seemed to happen in the flash of an eye, or...multiple eyes. Wasn’t that how these things always went, though? And what was it with these people and eyes anyway? Nell had seen plenty of weird in her life, but people that at least looked human with eyes staring out from the middle of their palms certainly was something new. Kaden beat her to the punch with the knife, but at least she had her own in hand after drawing it from a boot, not yet willing to resort to magic when Miriam was still running around god knows where, and she didn’t really know who this Sera person was. She heard a splash behind her as Orion went down, but assumed he’d be well enough to get up on his own, especially if her suspicions proved true. But then a scream went up, and she was forced to look away from the oncoming cultists, having to put her faith in Kaden and the others that they’d fend them off for the time being. “I’ve got him!” she called out to the others, signaling to keep doing what they were doing as she plunged herself into the icy waters of the lake. She ran out to the thrashing man as fast as she could, swimming when the floor of the lake dropped out from beneath her. Hopefully the piece of shit squid demon wasn’t close by. Her eyes opened in the murky depths to get a better handle on the situation only to be met with...more eyes. Reaching out, she grabbed for Orion’s arm, her own feet settling on the floor of the lake. Then she saw it. The enormous tentacle wrapped around Orion’s leg. Well not to-fucking-day, wannabe cthulhu. Under the safety of the water, she fired off the first banishing spell she could think of. It was a testament to the squid’s power that even with the tentacle unattached to the demon squid, the slippery limb only untangled from Orion’s leg instead of vanishing into thin air like any lesser demon related object might do. Still with that firm grip on Rio, she used a foot to kick off the lake floor, trying to get them back to the surface.

It all happened so fast that Winston almost struggled to keep track. One moment they were about to ask Sera how things had gone with Todd, not above a little bit of playful banter with their new friend, the next Kaden was drawing on a bunch of cultists with eyes for hands and then they were opening fire. Orion went in the water and started screaming, but Winston didn’t have time to go after them before Nell had it covered. Knowing that their friend would have the situation covered, Winston pulled the camera that they had brought with them from their bag and quickly began taking photos of anything even remotely eye related. After all, you never knew what evidence would come in useful. Satisfied with their photos they stowed their camera once more and headed over to Kaden’s side, they were intent on reprimanding them for irresponsible use of fire arms, but before they’d even managed to complain a single word, something collided with them. They weren’t sure where the cultist had come from, they weren’t sure how they’d missed it. But there were clearly more cultists then they’d planned for and Winston struggled against the strength of the figure that was pinning them down. Their assailant’s hood fell back and in the moonlight Winston was horrified to see that not only did this things have eyes in it’s hands, it’s eyes were sewn shut, the eyelids tied together with dirty looking thread. Gross.

Sera didn’t waste much time slicing open the fish in her hands once Kaden handed the knife over. “Jesus Criminy,” she mumbled under her breath. It felt like two seconds had passed and the entire group had dissolved into a chaotic mess. But the fish guts confirmed it--well, there was no way she was prepared for the human fucking eyeballs welded into its guts, but it confirmed the bad vibes she had moments before. “Yeah, let’s shoot at the creepy fuckers. That won’t piss them off at all,” she grumbled. Nell seemed to have the Rio-drowning situation under control and she darted for creep going after Winston. Nails dug in and she pulled the hooded figure off of them, tossing him into the water not a few feet from them. When another set of eyeball hands wrapped around her, she almost smirked. It’d been a while since she had a good tussle like this. She elbowed him in the side and back peddled until they went flying underwater with the other one. It only took a few moments for the water around her to grow bloody and Sera emerged, hauling herself out as two hooded figures floated down the water. “We’ve probably seen enough, yeah?” She called out to her other compadres, trying not to make a show of picking cult-flesh out of her teeth. She held the knife up, gesturing for them to follow her back to the gates.

Shit, maybe a gun was a bad move. Guns were loud and alerted the cops. Like the ones Kaden lied to earlier and assured that he had everything under control and was in fact supposed to be here. Putain. Too late. He’d started off just shooting at their feet, but as the creepy hooded hand-eye people descended on them, he started readjusting his aim. One fell down before it could get a hand on him. But it sure got close enough for him to see that their eyes were sewn shut. Shit. This was fucked up. Before he could get out another shot off, a kick came from behind at the back of his knees and then a force shoved him to the ground. A hooded figure was above him with a knife, elaborately decorated with runes he was only going to be able to admire for a few more seconds if this kept going the way it was headed. Merde. The point of the blade was about to plunge into his iris when Kaden kicked up at the figure and rolled to the side. The cultist went reeling back and the knife fell next to Kaden’s ear. He scrambled up and took the fucking thing. He looked over and saw Winston on ground not to far away and Sera fucking yanking the assailant into the water. Alright then, so she was pretty handy to have around. He ran over and put his hand out to help pull Winston back to their feet. Another glance and there was Rio and Nell, soaking wet and climbing out of the lake. And behind them, a shitton more of those creepy hoods. Putain. “Running, now’s the time for running!” he said as he turned to start booking it the hell out of there. This was way more than he bargained for.

Whatever had latched onto Orion’s leg, it was caught on something and pulling him down. And he couldn’t kick it off of him. He was getting dragged down further into the lake and had basically given up hope when he felt someone else grabbing onto him. A moment later and the whatever had been latched onto his leg finally let go, and he was being dragged to the surface. He gasped for air as soon as he emerged from the water, keeping his eyes closed and letting his savior drag him to the surface. He began spitting water out, a gag reflex coming on as he remembered the eyeballs trapped between his fingers, “It’s in my mouth, it’s in my mouth. I swallowed the creepy lake water. Ew, ew, ew.” He spit, trying to clear everything from his mouth. Finally, he focused for a moment long enough to look over and find Nell soaking wet next to him, “Thank you.” He breathed, relaxing long enough to realize that the five of them were cult problem had not gone away while he had been under water. “Oh god, the cultists are still here.” Orion sighed, not quite having the energy anymore to be terrified. He heard Kaden warning the group that it was time to go and he was happy to oblige, climbing back onto to his feet and making sure Nell had done the same before they took off towards the direction they had come from.

Once Nell was sure she and Orion had made it safely from the lake, she was taking inventory of the situation anew, vagley hearing Kaden yelling about running. Fleeing a fight wasn’t really in Nell’s blood, but she didn’t seem to have much of a choice as everyone else seemed to disperse. Winston. Where was Winston? Finally she found them underneath one of the cultists, and she drew a knife to throw towards the weird eyeball little fucker. With deadly accuracy and a thud, the blade found its mark in the creepy bastard’s neck. “Winston, time to go!” she called out, as if they’d been willingly dilly dallying. She began to run after the rest of the group. But then her steps came to a halt, as if remembering something in the middle of all the chaos. “Keep going! I just want a bit of sushi!” They could make of that what they would as Nell dove back into the water. She made the journey as quickly as she could before finding the tentacle that had wrapped around Orion, slicing through it with a large, magic blade to take a bit for herself. Then she was back to the shore, running behind Kaden and Orion once more with the slimy bit of squid-like limb in her hands. “Okay, got it! Now it’s time to go!”

Sera was in and out of the water so fast that Winston wondered what she had done to the poor dude. Then Kaden was helping them to their feet and they were running. They hated running. But for once, Winston had come prepared for this. They had considered that normally when they went to places that they weren’t meant to go, and when they did things that they weren’t meant to, and when they did it under the cover of night, well sometimes they had to have an escape plan. Magic stink bombs weren’t really orthodox but Winston was kind of dying to try this. “Thank god that Todd’s frat house decided they wanted to stink bomb the other frats…” they muttered as they pulled the contraption they had cobbled together from their bag, pulling it back they hucked it behind them and dashed off after everyone else. “I would run, we’re upwind for now and that thing will really stink so -- well we should be fine but if you don’t want to have to de-skunk yourself when the wind changes … not to mention the crazy eyeball people, let’s get fucking going!”

#wickedswriting #chatzy #winston #danetobelieve #nell #nelllraiser #orion #3starsquinn #sera #thelittlemerdermaid #eye spy #writing

[merrysithmas]

mmmm hard and quick question who tops boris or theo

😂🤣sorry i just need to pick myself up off the floor after thinking about THEO topping anyone of his own free will. the only kind of person i can imagine Theo topping is like... Agent Q from the new Bond movies but even after that they're like, yeahhh maybe this isn't for us. Lmao. Bc Theo doesn't like... want that.

(disclaimer: as a gay, i personally don't really like analyzing this topic in fandom, there is no menu or standard to human behavior and everyone reacts to the world differently and experiences pleasure differently, esp in a queer dynamic, so im like... who cares, dynamics are fluid anyway. but for sake of analyzing text here we go)

Based off the context of their personalities and dynamic, it is obvious Theo is thrown into massive depression and self-loathing when sleeping with women (Carol, Kitsey, Julie). He describes the experiences of sleeping with women as something he is monotonously expected to do, something that makes him uncomfortable and ashamed, or something substandard, and he never colors his descriptions of his affairs with women with passion, relief, or pleasure. He is like an automaton, simply following society's rules of how he "should" act and behave (or what he believes is so), essentially a Live Action Roleplay of misery that he follows with total loathing but adament piousness to stave off the horrors of his PTSD.

Now this is a point because of the way Theo and Boris (1) feel power and (2) experience comfort. Theo feels comfort and safety and power when he is vulnerable. He spends the entire book presenting a tremelous facade of being untouchable, invulnerable, and aloof (sometimes forcibly) when all the while he is dying inside from post-traumatic stress. He is a monumentous wall that could crack if you rested a feather on it. Yet Theo desperately abandons that ruse when he runs and crushes the painting to himself, his only relief, his most vulnerable and relieving moments. Crying, curling his fingers over it, feeling safe and sound alone and soft and aching when no one is looking. His only peace. Well, until Boris. Until Boris came along and held and crushed Theo himself to his own chest (mirroring how Theo crushed the painting) as Theo would wake screaming, choked with sobs, lulled to sleep in Boris' comforting arms. Again, safe, vulnerable, at peace.

So what I am saying is, Theo feels emotional fulfillment and safety and comfort not from the expression of control or power (in fact his agency is very much deleted by those things, as he actively kills his soul little by little with his obsessive unhealthy control and perfectionism of his fake life). Theo is relieved by and emotionally fulfilled by the expression of vulnerability and reception of safety and love. His best self is brought out and his healing starts and he feels like himself - like he is whole, finally.

So while Theo was curled into Boris' arms accepting his vulnerability in front of one other person (apart from his mother aka the painting), Boris at the same time was also experiencing something he seldom received -- a feeling of power and control and guardianship and the actualization of his physical realness, the use of his body to not just be victimized by violence from his father and then depersonalized but the use of it to protect and care for another. A gigantic relief and comfort and avenue of self-realization for him (bookended in adolescence by his gutsy kiss when Theo left -- acts of bold physical interjection giving him a sense of accomplshment and emotional power... ahem: Shh, Potter).

Boris is the exact opposite of Theo, which is another reason why they likely got on so closely and keenly. They are compliments. Whereas Theo feels relief and freedom in vulnerability, Boris feels no safety or comfort in vulnerability. Boris deeply fears vulnerability as evidenced by: his unrelenting horrific physical abuse by his father, his playful childhood violence used to express emotionality, jerking away fearfully when Theo tries to attend to his wound, becoming ghastly terrified when Theo drowns him, his profession as a gang leader who is highly skilled in physical intimidation and defense weaponry (so much so that he saves both of their lives in the shootout and does in fact get the painting back, even if short-lived), his ultimately flippant and nonvocal reaction to being literally shot, his liberal use of a plethora of a drugs, his aesthetic presentation of imposing nicely cut dark clothes meant to exhibit an intimidating figure/presence, his deleterious dynamics with Kotku (physical violence) and Theo (emotionally fearful), his habit of frequent colorful lying, his theft of the painting likely for some insurance of livelihood as a starving child.

Boris does not feel empowered and safe when he is not in control of his physical body -- Boris feels comfort and pleasure when he is in a position of control and power over himself and others. He has adapted his developmental shortcomings to serve his life in what he sees as a positive way and find peace with it. He leads a gang, he is a wealthy man, he can fix Theo's problems, he says honestly he has a good life.

There is also the question of emotional vulnerability -- again, although Theo is hugely closed off and it is pretty much the premise of the book, when he is most happy and most free is when he is emotionally vulnerable. Theo writes that he, of course, loves Boris. He writes he is happy during their idyllic year together and is more emotionally forthcoming about it than anything else in the book. He becomes jealous over Kotku because she "assumes ownership" of Boris - the person he feels emotionally comfortable and safe with. His love for his mother is an enduring buoy in his life, the painting brings him emotional relief, he falls into Hobie's arms as a derelict child, he frets feverishly over Boris' wounded arm. He is most himself in vulnerability after a lifetime of emotional suffocation.

Boris is also highly distressed by emotional vulnerability, but in context of Boris&Theo, it is Boris who is more fearful of emotional vulnerability as children. Theo cries in Boris arms, seeks Boris out, finds emotional solace in Boris. Boris, unaccostumed to this safety flees it and searches out an eventually toxic dynamic between he and Kotku instead. Boris changes as he grows older: feeling guilt over stealing the painting, telling Theo to value his life - he is philosophical by nature. However this emotional cognizance does not translate to his physical life. In fact it is the other way around: Boris uses that physical power and safety he has cultivated to lend him strength and space and psychological protection so that he can be emotionally self-analytical. Theo has become emotionally hardened until reunited with the painting and Boris, having Boris brings back Theo's physical and emotional freedom.

so yeah, TL;DR Boris.

obviously life and relationships are complex and there is variation in any dynamic but it seems that would be their standard, mimicking their first cuddled childhood moments in a more adult manner (shh, potter). it's a reflection of their dynamic. Theo is open to giving himself physically to Boris (in many small ways) and Boris is upheld and strengthened (and made better physically and emotionally) by that trust. He craves it so much he longs for it for ten years. And that support makes Theo better in return. A positive cycle.

i have such a hard time even imagining Theo topping Kistey like, that poor guy. It must have been soooo dead for him. Kitsey on the other hand would've worn a strap on just so they could have even a little fun until their eventual breakup but Theo's third-eye isn't opened far enough.

#ask #anon #the goldfinch #boreo

[avengerscompound]

Kintsugi - Chapter 4

Kintsugi: A Winterhawk Fanfic

Series Masterlist PREVIOUS //

Buy me a ☕ Character Pairing:  Bucky Barnes x Clint Barton x  F!Reader

Word Count:  2023

Rating:  E

Warnings:  Trigger warning for the aftermath of rape and torture, but no explicit rape or torture, angst, PTSD, smut (M|M and bit MMF, oral sex, anal sex, vaginal sex, frottage, double penetration).

Synopsis:  When you finally snap out of the mind control of the Winter Soldier Program, you feel guilty and broken. There are two men who know that exact feeling. While they aren’t the people they used to be, the people they are becoming with each other is something you find beauty in.

Chapter 4

Being shattered while you’re just starting to piece yourself back together is soul-crushing. It doesn’t hurt so much as make you feel numb. A feeling of hopelessness falls on you and the will to continue trying becomes difficult to find.

That is what it felt like when Clint stopped coming around.

You hated yourself for your reaction to him not showing up anymore. Your getting better shouldn’t be hinged on anyone but yourself. Yet him being around had helped. It helped you to accept that there was no undoing the past. That what had happened to you didn’t make you unlovable. That though they had made your shell a monster, the core of who you were was not that thing.

Then he ran and you doubted if any of it was true at all. Maybe you were the monster they made you. Maybe you weren’t meant to be around other people.

Bucky had done his best. He was hurt more than you. With Bucky, he’d lost a relationship too. Rather than accepting the solace, he offered you blamed yourself for taking that from them too. It had to be your fault after all. Before you, they were happy. After you, Clint left.

Your nightmares became worse, even with Bucky there to hold you. You kept returning to the night you broke free of HYDRA and surrounded by the corpses of families with young children and drenched in their blood. It always took Bucky much longer to soothe you back off to sleep. The taste of copper in your mouth never seemed to go away.

When Bucky didn’t show up one night when you were getting ready for bed you started worrying he’d realized too. That whatever he’d thought he could see in you wasn’t really there at all. It was more hope than actual evidence that you were more human than monster.

It took you a long time to fall asleep that night. Your mind went over the darkest escapes from this half-life you felt like you were leading. The most innocent being that you just run. Become the ghost you used to be. Leave everyone behind and attempt to just do no more harm. From there it just got worse until you fell asleep trying to think what would be the most fitting death for a monster such as yourself.

You woke screaming and soaked in sweat. In your dreams, you were being tortured and made to kill again. This time every face was one you knew and none of them deserved that fate. Yet you made them suffer.

You went to kick off the covers and sit up when the door opened. It startled you and you instinctively moved in a defensive position, ready to fight the intruder.

“Hey. It’s just us.”

It took you a moment for dream and reality to separate. You furrowed your brow and tilted your head to the side. “Clint?”

“Yeah, it’s the idiot bird. We’re both here.” Bucky said moving towards your bed.

“I thought you’d abandoned me too.” You whispered making room for them. As they get closer you realized they smell like sex and it all fell into place. Whatever issue there was had been fixed. They were together again.

Bucky climbed into bed with you first and wrapped you in his arms. “I’m here as long as you need me, doll.”

Clint climbed in on the other side and tentatively draped an arm over you. “I’m really sorry. I got in my own head. It didn’t have anything to do with you. Like always, I was an idiot.”

You don’t say anything. You don’t even really know how you feel, except for a vague sense of being grateful that you aren’t alone right now. You run your fingers along Clint’s forearm and close your eyes. Letting the warmth of their bodies and the sound of their breathing ease you back to sleep.

The next morning you woke to them shifting around you. You didn’t want to open your eyes for fear that you’d find out it wasn’t real. Slowly though, you opened your eyes.

“Hey, sleepy,” Bucky said, his voice gravelly. “How’d you sleep.”

You sit up and take a breath. “Good. Well, better after…”

“I’m so sorry. Really. I just… told myself that you were better without me here.” Clint said sitting up and rubbing your back.

You shook your head and patted his thigh. “No. Definitely not.”

Clint went to say something and you shook your head again. “I should be though, don’t you think?”

Bucky pulled back suddenly and his hands started opening and closing on the sheets. “Don’t… please don’t do this - just when I got Clint back.”

You touched his thigh and he flinched from you. “Shh… it’s not that at all. I just think… I love that you are here for me. And if you’re getting something from me too. Good. All the better. But we can’t hinge our whole healing on one other person. We need to get better. Not just soothe ourselves by creating attachment issues.”

Bucky slowly raised his eyes to meet yours. “We can still keep doing this?”

You nodded your head and squeezed his thigh. “I don’t even know what this is. But yeah. I don’t want to lose it. I just want to get better.”

So the three of you focused. You put your energy into healing. With the help of Sam Wilson, you found a therapist that was actually able to help you with the deep issues the three of you had been through. Mostly you each saw her one on one. There were group sessions once a week though and they were painful in the way cleaning a wound is. It stung hearing what Bucky and Clint were dealing with. Because it was familiar and raw in you.

As the Winter Soldier, you had been devoid of emotion. Now it all came out in rivers. Sometimes it felt too much to even bear. Bear it you did and each day whether it be a good one where you actually felt like you might be getting better and there was a happy future for you or a bad one where all you could do was lie in bed weighed down by pain, you felt closer to Clint and Bucky.

The question came to you if it was possible for there to be two people for you? The answer you eventually came to was, it didn’t matter. If they were always just for each other, and you were always the friend, that was enough. Your love could be unrequited. It didn’t matter because it existed and in its existence, you became whole again.

One day you were in your quarters repairing a bowl you had broken. Clint and Bucky had come in. Knocking was getting less these days. There seemed to be a sixth sense you each had for when it was okay to seek each other out.

You didn’t look up, too absorbed in the task you were performing.

“Whatcha doing, doll?” Bucky asked, looking over your shoulder.

“I’ve been having trouble with the whole, ‘you’re not broken your bent’ philosophy. That I’ll be able to spring back. Because I feel broken.” You explained. Bucky and Clint both nodded in understanding. “In my last session, Ashley started talking about this Japanese philosophy of wabi-sabi where beauty is found in imperfection. That it’s transient and when things age or break you find a new beauty in them.”

“That’s good for the 100-year-old.” Clint teased and Bucky punched him in the arm.

You chuckled and pushed the two pieces of pottery together so the gold lacquer you had just applied to the broken edge squeezed out through the crack. “One of the things that we talked about me doing was Kintsugi. Or at least, this kinda western bastardized version of it. Traditionally they used gold or silver to fuse broken shards of pottery together. This is just epoxy and mica powder. But she thought it would be good to have a craft and that if I can make something beautiful out of something broken maybe I can start seeing that in myself.” You shrugged. “Sounds dumb, but this is pretty.” You held up the two pieces so they could see the join as the epoxy started to bond.

“It doesn’t sound dumb. And that’s really pretty, doll.” Bucky said.

“Looks like Bucky’s arm,” Clint added. Bucky glared at him. “It does. I mean kinda. Gold and dark grey. Come on.”

“It does a little bit.” You agreed. “What’s up?”

Clint and Bucky shuffled where they sat and looked at each other. “It’s just… Buck and me… You … Fuck.” Clint babbled.

“What the bird brain here is trying to say is that we love you,” Bucky said.

You just stared at them open-mouthed not sure what to say. You can’t remember ever hearing those words directed at you before. It’s likely it had happened once, back before you had been pulled apart and pieced together as a killer, but you’d been taken so young that those memories felt far away and like you were viewing them through gauze. You couldn’t figure out the context either. Why would they come here to tell you that? Slowly realization hit. It was the same reason why you were here holding two broken shards of pottery together. They’d been told to in therapy.

“I love you too.” You replied simply. You weren’t sure if that was the right thing to do or not. It was true though. You did love them. You would love them until the stars went out you felt. Even if it wasn’t the kind of love they were expressing now.

“No, doll,” Bucky said putting his hand on your knee. “We’re in love with you. You make us feel… like the pottery. Complete and beautiful. I know … I know this is weird. But we needed to be honest with you. We can stay friends, but if you’re open for more.”

It’s funny how when hearing something you want is true it can both feel like pleasure and pain all at once. They loved you, just like you loved them but you didn’t know how that could even be a thing.

“I don’t know… How do we… This isn’t…” You babbled.

“It’s weird yes. But you feel it right?” Bucky asked.

You nodded your head but you felt close to tears. There were too many emotions swirling around inside you and you felt like they were going to crush you.

“Nothing about us is particularly normal. I ran away to the circus as a kid.” Clint said. “This feels right though. And you know me, I run from everything.”

“I want this.” You breathed. The words come out barely a whisper but they both know what you said. They smile at each other. “I have never felt about anyone how I feel about you. The world has more colors in it with you. I want this.”

Bucky sat forward so he was closer to you, just perching on the end of your bed. “Can I kiss you?”

You nodded and he leaned in capturing your lips with his. It was soft and gentle and then it wasn’t. His hands went to your hair and his tongue teased your lips. You parted them and swirled your tongue with his. The pottery you were holding fell from your hands and broke on the floor. It didn’t matter, you would fix it later.

You moved forward, sliding from your swivel chair to Bucky’s lap. You broke the kiss with Bucky and moved to Clint. His kiss was needy and more desperate than Bucky’s. You matched it, running your hand up his chest. Bucky ran his hands up your back and kissed your throat. “We want this, sweetheart.” He whispered. “We’re not rushing it though. Let’s take our time.”

You broke the kiss with Clint and he whined. “I’ve never been on a date before,” You said hopefully, looking at Bucky.

Bucky smiled at you. “We can do that. Let’s make this our normal, hey?”

// NEXT

#bucky barnes #clint barton #hawkeye #the winter soldier #winterhawk #bucky barnes x reader #clint barton x reader #bucky barnes x clint barton x reader #bucky barnes x clint barton #winterhawk fanfic #hawkeye fanfic #the winter soldier fanfic #reader insert #fanfic #fanfiction #angst #smut #kintsugi

[dannyphandump]

Dancing Around the Truth pt. 4

(Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | to be continued) (Read on AO3 | FFN)

Summary: The last thing Valerie wanted was to get caught up in Paulina’s plot to ask Phantom to the winter formal.  Unfortunately Paulina’s made sure she doesn’t have a choice.  Meanwhile, Danny just wants to finish his Algebra quiz.  For @phantombreadproject for the Christmas Truce 2018.

Other Notes: Finally back around to updating this!  I’m hoping to only have one chapter left after this one.

Today 4:27 AM

I’m sorry

That text hadn’t left Valerie’s mind since she’d read it upon waking up this morning.  Just two words from Danny, no context.  Of course, it wasn’t that hard to guess; he had to be apologizing for lying about dating her.  But 4:27 AM?  He should’ve been asleep, not worrying about something as dumb as that.  It didn’t matter if Paulina thought that Phantom wanted to date her, so long as she didn’t connect him to Danny.

She hiked her backpack up higher on her shoulder as she stepped off the bus and headed towards the courtyard.  It was always tempting to take her board instead of the smelly, packed deathtrap, but she only risked that when she was running seriously late.  After this whole fiasco with Paulina, she might not even be able to do it then.

If she’d flown here though, she might’ve had more time to talk to Danny before first period.  If he was even here yet… which he wasn’t, she realized after a quick scan of the area.  Sam leaned against a tree and chatted with Tucker, but there was no sign of their other friend.  Alarm bells went off.  What if Danny hadn’t been apologizing for what he’d said? What if he’d gotten caught in a ghost fight and he’d gotten hurt, or –

Or I’m completely overreacting, she thought, mentally rolling her eyes at herself.  She might not be used to Danny Fenton throwing himself into danger, but she knew Phantom was tough.  He wasn’t going to get himself hurt that easily.

She nearly jumped out of her skin when an incorporeal hand tapped her on the shoulder.  She spun, ready to summon her suit and blast whatever ghost had snuck up on her – when the wispy outline of Phantom faded into view.

“Sorry,” he said quickly.  “Can you cover me?”

It took a few seconds for her shocked system to recover enough to answer.

“I –  uh, sure.”

He grinned, an eerie look when his teeth somehow seemed more solid than the rest of him.  Then he touched down and stood behind her.  White rings split from his middle, leaving behind a perfectly human-looking Danny Fenton.  She gasped faintly.  She’d seen half-ghosts transform before, but never so close.  She could physically feel Phantom’s cold aura disappear as he changed back into the form of her friend.

She frowned as a thought occurred to her.

“Do you do that often?  Change in public like that?”

“Well, yeah, I guess.” He shrugged, far too nonchalant for someone whose secret identity could’ve just been blown.  “Only when no one’s looking, though.”

She scanned the courtyard.  It was true; everyone was busy chatting with their friends, but still.  She’d never risk her secret like that.

“You should still be careful,” she admonished.  “Especially around me. I don’t think Paulina’s going to just let me go now that she thinks you like me.”

“Oh.”  His cheeks reddened as he rubbed his neck.  “I really didn’t think that one through.”

She couldn’t argue with that.  She couldn’t blame him either, though; Paulina probably wouldn’t have left him alone for anything less.  The other girl had hardly let him go even after that.

“It’s fine.  I can handle her.”  She shrugged, trying to keep her voice casual as she asked, “So, that’s all it was?  Not thinking?”

“No!”  He said quickly, holding out his hands.  “I mean – yes, but – agh.  I’m really sorry, Val.  I didn’t mean to ask you like that.”

Her heart sped up.  Embarrassment still stained his face pink, but she cracked a smile.

“So how did you mean to ask me?”

His eyes widened.  “I didn’t – wait, did you want me to?”

Did she?  On one hand, her situation was too complicated for a dating life.  On the other hand, she had really liked Danny.  If it hadn’t been for the ghost hunting, she would’ve gone out with him forever ago.  She’d thought that was too dangerous to drag him into.  How ironic, she almost snorted.

“Nevermind,” he answered, kicking at the snow with the toe of his sneaker.  “It’s fine.  I shouldn’t have – you just barely found out who I am.  It wasn’t right to ask now.”

In spite of his words, she could see the light drain from his blue eyes as his shoulders drooped.  He really wore his heart on his sleeve – unlike with the A-listers, she’d never have to worry about where she stood with him.

“...I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she finally said with a small smile.  He looked up, lips pursed and eyebrows drawn together.

“What do you mean–?”

She lightly smacked his arm.  “Lighten up.  You’re not supposed to be the serious one.”

She could see the memory hit him, bringing a grin back to his face.

“So–”

“Shh, you didn’t even let me answer.”  She raised a finger and tried to hide the tight nervousness in her chest.  “One date, Fenton.”

His grin filled his whole face.  “Really?”

Like she could’ve said no to that face.  She hadn’t realized just how much she’d missed it.

“Yeah, really.  Just not to the dance, I wouldn’t want Paulina to–”

“You wouldn’t want me to what?”

Valerie saw Danny jump before she fully processed the voice. Of course.  Paulina just had to show up right behind her.  She turned slowly, not about to show weakness.

“Uh…” Danny’s face went redder than it had already been.  

“None of your business,” Valerie curtly told the other girl, before Danny could make up a lie that would get them both in even deeper trouble.

“Uh, when you’re talking about me it is my business.”  Paulina put her hands on her hips.  The bell rang for them to go to class, but she didn’t show any sign of budging.  In the distance, Sam and Tucker sent the three of them a worried glance, but Danny subtly nodded at them to go inside.  Valerie wondered what lengths those two would go to get Paulina off Danny’s back, if necessary.

Must be nice, she thought.  Having friends you can count on.

Well, now Danny was counting on her.  Unfortunately, her mind was just as blank as his.  

“I was just, uh, wondering if anyone had asked you to the dance,” Danny ended up saying before she could come up with anything.  To his credit, it was a believable enough story.  There were a million other boys at school who must be asking the same question.

Paulina’s face instantly hardened.  “That’s none of your business, loser.”

“Hey,” Valerie said.  “You don’t have to talk to him like that.”

“And I don’t have to talk to you at all, Gray.  Unless you want me to let slip something you’ll regret.”  Her voice barely tremored, betraying that she wasn’t as put together as she appeared.  Danny’s comment had hit her harder than Valerie had realized.  Either she was still bitter about being rejected in general, or she really had liked Phantom that much.  It was even weirder to consider now that she knew who Phantom was.

“Calm down, Paulina,” she said.  She couldn’t blame her for still being upset.  She could blame her for taking it out on her, but that wouldn't help right now.  “Let’s just get to class.”

She stood stiffly for a moment like she might argue, but finally spun on her heel and stalked off towards the school.

“That was… weird,” Danny said softly, in case Paulina could still hear them.  “I’ve never seen her so…”

“Upset?”  Valerie volunteered when he fished for the word.

“I was going to say mean, but… I really hurt her, didn’t I.”  He sighed. “You’d think I’d feel better after how many times she turned me down, but it still sucks.”

“You can’t make everyone happy.  I’m sure she’ll get over it soon.”  She hoisted her backpack higher up on her shoulders.  “Come on, neither of us can afford to be late to Tetslaff’s class again.”

He smiled a little.  “Race ya?”

She snorted.  “What are we, five?”

“You’re wasting time, Val!”  He said as he ran off towards the school, his purple backpack barely slowing him down.  She just laughed and raced behind.

XXX

It didn’t make sense.  None of it did.  But she hadn’t misheard — Valerie had agreed to go on a date with Fenton.  And she’d tried to cover it up, both of them had.  Maybe she shouldn’t have confronted them about it, but she was just so —

“Ugh!”  She squeezed her makeup brush so hard it almost snapped.  She’d resorted to hiding out in a storage closet and doing her makeup by her hand mirror and the flashlight of her phone; the bathroom was too risky right now.  She didn’t want to run into Valerie or even Star, not like… not like this.  But with enough work, she could cover up the redness around her eyes.  The redness that was rapidly returning as she fought to hold the water back.

She hadn’t meant to cry.  She didn’t cry; she’d trained herself better than that.  Even if Phantom was the only boy she’d ever liked, what did it matter?  Her papa would eventually have her marry some more prestigious man anyway, whether she wanted to or not.  Even if it meant sleeping with a man she would never, could never be attracted to.  Because — and only now would she finally admit it to herself — she wasn’t attracted to anyone.

But that wouldn’t have mattered to Phantom.  He was a ghost; he couldn’t, wouldn’t want her for her body, right?  So they could have been together forever and he never would have done what her last boyfriend had tried to do, what she was so afraid would happen again —

Stupid, useless gasping sounds leaked from her lips.  Tears smeared her half-done makeup down her face.  Useless.  She shouldn’t be skipping first period anyway, but at this rate she’d have to skip second too before she could pull herself back together.  And all over a stupid — a stupid boy!  She was the one who was supposed to have this effect on people, not the other way around.

But it wasn’t just the rejection that had gotten to her.  Valerie was going to turn down Phantom — and to go out with Fenton, of all people.  That meant she had another chance, right?  Phantom would be crushed, and then…

...That wasn’t what Paulina wanted.

She wiped her eyes on the back of her sleeve, for once forgetting about the mascara and foundation that would end up smeared there.  She’d never expected to feel like this… to feel sorry.  She’d done to Phantom what so many boys had tried to do to her: push and push until she finally relented.  She’d tried first to persuade and then to force herself into Phantom’s good graces.  But it didn’t work.

“I’m just a loser too now, huh?”  She whispered to herself, smiling a little as she sniffed.  

It was then that the door slammed open, flooding the storage closet with blue light.  The significance of that didn’t register; she was too preoccupied with the girl standing in the doorway.  Shock morphed into panic.

“Get out!”  Paulina practically snarled at Valerie.

“How was I supposed to know this closet was taken?”  She snapped back, shoving the door shut.  “I just need a place to change and I’ll be out of your hair.”

Valerie jumped into the air, her hoverboard sprouting from the soles of her shoes.  Despite her anger at the girl, she couldn’t help gasping in amazement as the suit slid over her.  If only Paulina had a suit like that, she could hide her puffy eyes with no problem.

“Wait a sec — did the ghost already come through here?”  Valerie asked. Paulina hadn’t even realized there was a ghost attack, though that explained the blue light outside.  The dark storage closet lacked the warning lights on the inside, apparently.

“Just get out, Gray,” Paulina repeated, hating the way her voice snagged.

“You’re… not planning to corner Phantom in here, are you?”  She asked dubiously.  Paulina let out a barking laugh, one she would’ve hated if she’d had the energy to care.

“What, you think he’s going to come looking for me?  After that?  And you think I want to see me like this?”  Paulina gestured to herself vaguely.  “You’re supposed to be the bright one, Val.”

Besides, even if she’d wanted to, how would she get him to come into a storage closet of all places?  The accusation didn’t even make sense.

“Then, why are you…?  Are you alright?”

Paulina sniffed; of all the people to see her like this, why did it have to be her?

“Doesn’t matter.  Go fight your stupid ghost, Gray.”

“I…” There was a long pause, and then Valerie’s board powered down, her suit retracting as she landed gracefully on the tile floor.  “I think I’ll let Phantom take care of it.”

This day just kept getting better and better.

“Oh, great.  Now you’d rather take out your anger on me than on the ghosts, huh? Is that it?”  Paulina scowled.  The phone flashlight barely illuminated Valerie’s face, but she didn’t seem to be scowling back… for once.

“No, I was just… worried about you, actually.”  Valerie took a seat on the ground next to Paulina.  “You took yesterday harder than I thought.”

“I’m over it,” she lied.  Valerie raised her eyebrows, but Paulina didn’t have to back down.  What could Valerie do, make her talk about it? ...Then again, Valerie was the only one she could talk to about this.  She was the only one who knew about her rejection.  If Valerie wanted to listen… would it hurt?  Paulina still knew her secret; Valerie couldn’t use anything Paulina told her against her.

“Paulina, I haven’t seen anyone cry this much since Dash lost the championship game last year,” Valerie said in that half-joking, half-deadpan tone Paulina hadn’t heard in so long.  It had been the perfect way to make fun of the boys without them catching on, and it had also been Valerie’s go-to method to cheer Paulina up.  In spite of everything, she hadn’t forgotten.  It was enough to make Paulina laugh just a little.

“He totally didn’t think we would notice, too.”  Paulina smiled.  “He tried to pass it off as ‘manly face sweat,’ remember?”

“Like I could forget that.”  Valerie chuckled; it echoed in the small space.  “This must sound rich coming from me, but… you don’t have to be like Dash.  It’s okay to cry.”

“You’re right.  You wouldn’t cry if you were me,” she said lowly, the moment of reminiscence broken.  “You’d be out there punching that boy in the face if he hurt you.  I guess you’ll probably end up punching him anyway, since you turned him down to go out with Fenton.”

Valerie’s dark eyes widened.  “You — you heard that?”

“Please, Val, I’m not stupid.  You two weren’t exactly being subtle.”

Valerie frowned at that, looking away.  “Well, I wasn’t exactly expecting eavesdroppers either.  You’re making it really hard for me to like you, you know that?”

“Then why are you trying?”  Paulina asked, not sure if she meant it sarcastically or sincerely.  Valerie held grudges; that was common knowledge.  By the time Paulina had realized the damage she’d done to the other girl, it had been too late to save their tenuous friendship.  Or at least, that’s what she’d assumed.

Valerie folded her legs under her, deliberately picking specks of dust off of her skirt.

“I guess because… I’ve ruined enough friendships by jumping to conclusions about people,” she admitted.  “I always thought you were just into Phantom because he was strong and pretty.”

“Handsome,” Paulina corrected; Valerie rolled her eyes, though her cheeks seemed a bit brighter in the dim light.

“Fine, handsome.  Anyway, I guess I didn’t realize you… actually cared.  Do you actually care?”

That was the last question Paulina expected to get called out on.  If it was about any other boy, it would’ve been easy to answer.

“...I did,” she admitted quietly, rolling her makeup brush between her fingers.  “I just… didn’t show it in the right way.  I acted like the entitled brat everyone thinks I am.”

Valerie nodded.  Paulina hadn’t wanted the girl to agree with her, but what could she expect?  

“Maybe that’s what it’s like to be in love.” She sighed.  “I guess I could handle not feeling that again.”

“It’s not like Phantom was your only shot at love, Paulina,” Valerie pointed out.  “You’re only seventeen.”

Paulina shook her head.  “Easy for you to say, Gray.  I’m… not like most other girls.  And not just because I’m unfairly beautiful.”

Valerie rolled her eyes.  “Then what is it?”

She debated whether or not it was worth sharing.  It would be a big risk, a potential disaster if her secret got out.  If all the boys found out she was off the menu, she could kiss the A-List goodbye.

But Valerie had already lived through that. Partly due to her unsettling vendetta against ghosts – but, in large part because of Paulina pushing her aside.  Maybe… if Valerie was willing, now was as good a time as any to start rebuilding their bridge.

“I don’t… I don’t really like boys,” Paulina mumbled.

Valerie blinked.  “Really?  So you’re like–”

“I’m not a lesbian,” Paulina grumbled, though she should’ve expected that.  “I don’t like anyone.  I meant it when I said the ghost boy was the only one I’d had a crush on.”

Valerie was silent for a while.  Too long.  Paulina was used to keeping others waiting, not the other way around.

“You can’t tell anyone, Gray,” she warned when the silence dragged on.  “Or your secret is as good as out.”

“Wha– why would I do that?  It’s none of my business if you like anyone or not.  I was just thinking about how it explained a lot.”

“Really?”  Paulina’s brow furrowed.  “Is it that obvious?”

“No, just – you never really seemed to understand why boys followed you around all the time.  You only talked about boys when someone else brought it up first, or if you wanted something out of them.  And Star and I were usually pretty sure you were lying about who you had crushes on when we were younger.”

“You – wait, you knew?”  Paulina gaped.  All this time, she’d been trying to cover it up, and –

“I didn’t know.  I probably wouldn’t have even guessed, honestly.”  Valerie stretched her legs back out.  “I don’t go sticking my nose into other people’s business.”

“Uh-huh.  Like you didn’t just come in here to bother me?”

“I was just trying to help,” Valerie held up her palms.  “But if you want, I can go now.  I’m still curious how you ended up getting a crush on Phantom considering all that, but that’s up to you if you want to talk or not.  I just want you to know that we don’t have to fight anymore.  I’m tired of holding grudges, especially over something like this.”

Valerie… didn’t care.  Not in a bad way, she just – she wasn’t like the gossipping A-Listers anymore.  It didn’t matter to her who Paulina liked or didn’t like.  It was such a foreign concept to Paulina, finding out a secret and not even considering using it.

“I guess we both have better things to do, huh?”  Paulina smiled sincerely. “I can’t explain entirely how I ended up crushing on Phantom… I think it’s because I knew he wouldn’t use me for my body, you know?  Since he’s dead and all.  I don’t think ghosts can do that, you know, physically.”  She shrugged.  “I didn’t expect to fall for him so hard.  I… wasn’t really thinking straight.  Especially when I was with you two last night, Val, I’m – sorry.”

“Huh.  So you do have a heart somewhere in there.”  Valerie punched her shoulder lightly.  She wasn’t one to be super sappy; that was enough for Paulina to know she was forgiven.  “We all make mistakes, Paulina.  Trust me on that one.”

“Is that your way of saying you’re sorry too?”

“I guess you could say that.”  She chuckled.  “I think we’ll both be sorry if we don’t haul our butts back to class soon, though.”

“Yeah–”

But before either of them could stand from the closet floor, a translucent figure came flying through the wall.

“Phantom?”  Paulina gasped.  Regardless of what she’d said, she couldn’t help her heart speeding up.  He was here, he was back, was he here to see her–?

“Paulina?”  He gaped back, his green eyes lighting up the room.  “Valerie?  What are you two– nevermind, sorry, I’m just gonna find a different closet.”

He was gone as quickly as he’d come, leaving Paulina blinking in confusion.

“Closet?  Why would Phantom be looking for a closet?”  She asked Valerie, who shrugged and dodged her eyes.

“Beats me.  Maybe he needed a mop to clean up some of the damage from the ghost fight, who knows.”

“Huh…”

Paulina followed Valerie’s lead in sneaking back out of the storage closet, forgetting that she hadn’t finished reapplying her make-up.  Whatever, she now had a bigger issue to deal with.

The last thing Valerie had told her had been a blatant lie.

#dancing around the truth #tali writes #valerie gray #danny fenton #danny phantom #paulina sanchez #let's hope the read more link works this time #phanfiction

[burlybanner]

Syzygy - An AU of Infundo (post-Infundo Chronicles).

Chapter 8: Me and My Shadow

Summary:  What does real fear taste like? Link to Chapter 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7

Author Note - Trigger warning:  DiD-type cycling and past child abuse/trauma. Please feel free to contact me if anything does not sound right? I want to be sensitive. It’s very much a unique situation because well...we’re talking about Bruce Banner, let’s be honest. But  I’d like to get this as “right” as possible (or at least not jarringly wrong).

**

"My God..." Bruce ran a shaky hand across the recording. The recorded 'him' paused, apparently giving Bruce time to absorb and understand.

"You recorded yourself?"

He jumped at the sound near his ear. Steve had effectively swaddled him, but he wasn't feeling his body heat for whatever reason. And he really, really wanted to. "No, I...I don't remember ever--Steve, it..it's not me. I mean, I don't remember this." He gulped. He couldn't take his eyes off his doppelganger, but his twin didn't seem phased. He rocked in his chair, examined his nails, played with the keyboard. All things Bruce might have done, except--

"Jarvis, what's the timestamp on this recording?"

"04:32 AM, early this morning."

"After Tony put me to bed?"

"Yes. And not more than seven minutes after he left for his flight to Korea."

Steve had been strangely quiet and kept checking between Bruce and Bruce's twin. Bruce could've said more to reassure him but even he wasn't sure what he even could say at this point.

He frowned and ran a shaky hand beneath his chin. "I must've been sleepwalking."

"You weren't sleepwalking, Banner," the not-Bruce said, and a colder chill traveled down Bruce's back.

"What's going on, Bruce?" He felt Steve's hand clutch his shoulder and Bruce unconsciously leaned into it. "If this isn't you, who is it?"

"I-I don't have a clue..."

The not-Bruce cleared his throat. "The fright of viewing 'yourself' at this point should be wearing off. You must be insanely curious." He smiled faintly. "It's a shocking revelation, yes, but it shouldn't be a huge surprise. You've known, Bruce. You've refused to acknowledge me as truth, but you've known."

"Oh, Christ," Bruce whispered. He began shaking and Steve's presence tightened around him. Steve, fortunately, chose to listen and not speak, but Bruce had no idea what to say either. His mind began melting and swirling at the possibility, the implication--

"Shh, shhhh, don't drown in the madness, Banner," the not-Bruce murmured. "It's not difficult. Remember our favorite quote from our childhood: 'when you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.' "

"Pause, Jarvis!" Bruce suddenly shot up from his chair, knocking Steve back.

"Whoa--"

"Sorry, I'm...I'm sorry. Steve, give me a..."

Bruce helped Steve to his feet, but he shook hard enough to feel like he was flying apart, and Steve immediately wrapped him in his arms. "Bruce, babe, it's okay. I'm not hurt. Don't worry about it--"

"No..no. It's not fine. It's..." Bruce began wringing his hands, and he wasn't listening. His ears weren't producing...sound. He couldn't feel.  Or see. He slammed his eyes shut and pulled from Steve, stumbling about while prodding That Place in his mind. Cautiously he prodded that Space, mentally feeling for for the Gate to Hulk's presence, but where? Was it...wait. No, not a Gate at all. Had it ever been a Gate? It was--

Hello, Banner.

Bruce's eyes flew open and his legs crumbled.

"Bruce--!"

Steve was right behind him, rubbing his back, telling him to take deep breaths but he couldn't hear him, he felt him. It took time, but really, what was time? An idea, a construct. Beats of measurement on a musical scale...he stuffed down a nervous giggle threatening to bubble from his chest.

He'd have to explain it when he didn't fully understand.

Stop lying, you know full well who I am. Good god, Banner, you're almost as dramatic as Tony.

He shook again but what...was true? What was happening now--? No...no. He had knowledge, and knowledge was truth and power.

Are you sure?

"S-stop speaking," he said out loud, and he felt Steve's hand still across his back. "No, I meant...dammit."

He breathed deep, meditative breaths that he'd normally do during his asanas. Feeling returned to his body. His fleeting senses returned. Sight. Taste. Smell. Sound. "Steve," he began, when it felt safe enough. "You need...to know something. I hate explaining it and I don't like it...but. It makes sense now. Of course it makes sense."

"To you, maybe."

Bruce did laugh, too nervously, but he cautiously took Steve's hand. "Hold me, okay?" He whispered. "Hold me tight and be patient. This is going to be a lot to take in, and it's a lot for me to discuss." The light bulb went on and he shuddered against Steve's chest. "Ahh. I get it. That's why Tony...yes. Now I get why he left."

"But I don't!"

Bruce chuckled nervously and drew Steve's arms around his shoulder. "It's story time, Steve."

**

At age three, the abuse began because Brian Banner was a Tier One asshole and stole Bruce's life. Well, that's not fair. The circumstance created a second life, and Bruce added it. Three lives now, if he believed the current scenario. He'd never really openly spoke about the other parts but now was the time. He'd have no second chances.

"It wasn't...it wasn't entirely physical abuse," Bruce whispered. Steve's lashes were moist and Bruce could feel his boyfriend's heart beating. It was solid, steady, and strong. Beating like a kettle drum. "I don't talk about it, because..." Bruce sighed. His hands felt cold, but he could do this. He had to. "I didn't tell Mom. I wish I had. We might've left earlier if she--"

"I'm here, I'm not going away," Steve reiterated. He could feel Steve's lips scrape through his curls, feel his warm cheek transferring its warmth. "I love you, regardless. That won't ever stop. No matter what."

"Brian..." and Bruce shuddered at the memory. "Brian was fond of using 'tools' to see how I reacted. To test my 'humanity.' I was. Fuck, Steve. I wasn't even five and some days I couldn't sit because of what he...did. It was easier to disappear into myself. Someone Else could take what I couldn't."

Steve's hand stopped its administrations and Bruce closed his eyes. He knew it was all part of his abusive past but he couldn't help feeling Steve was disappointed in him. His head knew it wasn't true, but his heart...

"I'm sorry," Steve murmured. Bruce realized his scalp felt wet. At first he wasn't sure, but the small hitch and shuddered breath from Steve proved it. "I'm so, so sorry, Bruce."

Bruce squeezed Steve's arm. "It's okay," he said, but it still wasn't. After all these years it wasn't. Would never be okay.

It was why he would never be whole. Or complete. Just separately hurting pieces trying their hardest to exist.

Now you just sound pathetic, Banner. I can Front, if you're unwilling.

Quiet. You're not the Core. I am.

His response surprised them both, and the...Professor (yes, that Name felt right; he could "hear" Professor's confirmation of his name despite his lack of sibilants) slinking back to the quieter sections of his head.

We are...us. I get it. But from now on, no more hiding from me. We have to team up.

He felt something new churn in his mind, earthy and feather light. Like a gentle breeze with hints of petrichor. He could name it now. And naming was Power.

So be it, Professor acknowledged.

We have a lot of work to do and damages to reverse. So follow my lead.

Bruce tapped Steve's arm. "C'mon," he whispered. "I'll be okay. It's something that happened to me. It's horrible. It makes me sick to my stomach. And," he sighed, "it split my psyche. I think in threes, I guess." He tapped his head. "Three people have my address, if that makes sense."

Steve kissed his head. "Not really...but I love you. More than ever, maybe. You're the strongest man I know, Bruce Banner. Not because of the Hulk. Despite Hulk."

"Hmm," Bruce sighed. He settled into Steve's arms and explained the curiousness of DID and how it worked for him, and how he functioned in the System as the Core. But the other part of him - Professor, probably - had begun scheming behind the scenes.

"So this...DID?" Steve was still a bit snuffly but Bruce gently squeezed his arm. He loved seeing Steve's gentle side, even if it was at his own expense. "I'm not sure I follow. How does this explain Tony leaving?"

Bruce's smile curled the edges of his lips but the sadness was there. "I...may have scared him. Or rather my 'Person' did." He air-quoted so Steve could understand the context.

"You think so?"

Bruce licked his lips. "You saw how I reacted, right? Imagine if you were in Tony's shoes, seeing this guy for the first time. When I didn't even know he was there."

Steve got quiet, and Bruce lumbered to his feet. "Speaking of...we need to finish the video." He searched in his mind for Professor, but only felt an uncertain tickle there. 

Care to share with the class, Professor?

Nothing.

Probably wants me to see his damage. Bruce was angry, but not surprised. He drew in his brows and held out his hand to Steve. "I’m not sure what to expect next, but I'd appreciate your support."

"You know you have it. You've always had it, Muffin." Steve grabbed his hand and Bruce yanked him to his feet. "You have any suspicions?"

Shaking his head, Bruce slowly approached the video screen. Professor was in stasis, staring at his hands as if he knew what would happen next. This was a chess master, Bruce realized, in for the long haul. Maybe Professor was as neutral as he said but he was damn good at pulling strings Bruce didn't know about. And that made this Person particularly dangerous.

"All right, Jarvis," Bruce sighed. He remained standing while Steve came behind him and cuddled him close. He almost felt smothered in Steve's strong arms but he needed it. He needed to feel warm. Feel real.

Like the Velveteen Rabbit.

"Go ahead. Start it up again. Let's see what he has to say for himself."

#polyamory #chubby bruce fic #infundoau #chubby bruce banner #steve rogers #tony stark #bruce banner #american pi #science bros #hulk #stark spangled banner #bhm #chubby kink #syzygy #starkspangledbanner syzygy #professor hulk

[annamariexrogue]

chatzy ; gone wrong

WHERE: Erik’s Bunker WHO: @masterofmagnetismx, @sospeedy, @annamariexrogue, @im-not-a-liar WHY: The aftermath of Tommy’s encounter with Joker. MENTIONS: @jonnyxfrost, @hquinsel, @aceofknavess, @whatoswaldwants, @wanda--maximcff, @goldenelixxir

Anna: The alarm took her by surprise. She'd never heard it before, though she knew it had gone off in her absence. Jumping to her feet, she abandoned the book she'd been writing in. She needed to go to the surface. The person was close. Without giving it a second thought, she went to the strange lift that brought her to the surface, though it felt far too slow. She had to resist prying the doors open once the reached the top. At first she didn't see him. She hadn't thought to look down. Then her gaze caught the sight of silver/white hair and she gasped, dropping to her knees. "Tommy!!!"

Tommy: Tommy had not regained consciousness. By the time Anna found him, he was even more of a mess than he'd been in the cage. Blood matted down part of his hair on the side the bat had struck. His arms and legs were still bent at very unnatural angles, and enough time had passed for deep, horrible bruising to appear nearly everywhere. There were still lacerations on his arm from the lion, though they were the least of it.

Anna: Anna felt her hands shaking as she tried to push back his hair just enough to see the wound, but it wasn't any use. Thankfully, she already had her gloves on. "Tommy!!" She said again, her voice barely above a whisper. Somehow, she couldn't bring herself to speak any louder. "God, Jesus, fuck!!!" She wanted to move him, but she was afraid. He was broken in so many places that she feared hurting him - but she couldn't leave him here. Gritting her teeth, she used her enhanced strength to lift him. Bringing him to the nearest, stark white sofa, she laid him down. "T-Tommy, please." As fast as she could manage, she got to the kitchen and soaked a rag with cold water. When she returned to Tommy she began to clean his face, his hair, and only stopped to send a panicked text to Erik. 'COME HOME NOW!!!!!!!!'

Erik: Erik had been meeting with Harvey Dent to belatedly resolve what had happened with Anna. Their meeting was over, and he'd have been making his way back soon anyway. He had just left the warehouse when he received her message. "I'm on my way. What happened?" There was no use in asking if there was a problem - that much was obvious.

Anna: Trembling, Anna pushed Tommy's coat open to see if there were more wounds. The blood from his head injury had soaked the front of his jacket. A note dropped out and she snatched it up, unfolding the paper so she could read it. Confused, she quickly texted Erik again. "There's a note with him. It says 'Mercy is my middle name.' It's signed 'Joker' and with a smiley face. Erik, please hurry."

Erik: Erik came to a dead stop on the sidewalk when Anna replied. He read it twice, quickly, because it made no sense to him. He'd had no contact at all with Joker since the broadcast. Neither of them had made any attempt, as far as he was aware, to be in touch with the other person. It was not as though he'd stopped being aware of the Joker's presence, he'd simply had no use for him, and assumed the feeling was mutual for the time being. That he would dare make such a move, that he would be bold enough, stupid enough to take that step based on nothing, nearly had Erik going to the bar he'd originally met him instead of back to the bunker. It took a solid minute to convince himself that it had to wait. It had to be handled another way. He was still looking at Anna's message when he remembered the mutant boy who had stumbled so close to the bunker and said he worked for Joker. Erik had not let him go without having a way to contact him, to find him, again. He'd get answers before he made a move and the answers were going to come from Thierry.

Tommy: Several minutes after Anna's messages to Erik, Tommy took in a sharp, painful breath. He opened one of his eyes, as the other was swollen shut from the blows from the bowling pin after being taken and the later one from the bat. For a second he could not even begin to focus on figuring out where he was. He tried to sit up out of instinct, but the way it immediately pulled at his arms and legs made him scream. The toxin had worn off, and the sound echoed in the bunker.

Thierry: After the meeting with Magneto, Thierry had been wary, at first, to let him know where he lived. The fact that Magneto was Tommy's grandfather had changed his mind. He had given him his information shortly after his relationship with Tommy had changed. He had no work that night and was at him, reading, trying to distract himself from the fact that Tommy had not responded to his texts over the past few days - nor shown up to work. He assumed that he had come to his senses and was ghosting him. Like before, Thierry had taken things too far despite his caution. The only person he blamed was himself.

Anna: As soon as Tommy woke, Anna put a gloved hand to his cheek, horrified, but she tried to remain calm. "Shh, shh. You're safe, sugah. You gotta lay down. An’ listen to my voice. Erik's comin', he'll be here soon. You're gonna be okay." She brushed his hair comfortingly, careful to keep clear of the blood and where she saw he'd been struck, instead staying close to his cheek. "It's Anna. M'gonna go look for painkillers. Stay here, 'kay? Ya can hear me, right?"

Erik: Erik gave him no warning that he was coming. If he knew something about this, if he was involved somehow, he did not want to give him the chance to leave or call for help. The locks on his front door opened to him with a gesture and soon Erik stood in his doorway, his expression grim and angry. "Come with me. Now." He was taking him whether he wanted to go or not. Erik did not know the extent of what had happened, and he'd already taken too long to get back to the bunker.

Tommy: "Y-yes," he rasped. Of course he had no idea how he got there. The last thing he remembered was closing his eyes and waiting for the final blow from the bat. It hadn't killed him, obviously. While his body did heal faster than most, not enough time had passed for it to even begin, and so much damage had been done that it wouldn't have mattered anyway. All he could do was lay there and try to breathe.

Thierry: Stunned, Thierry jumped to his feet and the book fell to the floor. He had no idea why Magneto was here, but he immediately thought it had to do with Tommy, although he didn't know in what context. Without a word, he went straight to him, his eyes large and frightened, but it was not fear for himself. "Is it Tommy?" he asked softly, even though part of him did not want to know the answer.

Anna: Relieved, Anna's hand lingered on Tommy's forehead, but then she forced herself to get up even though she did not want to leave him - but it was too difficult to see him in so much pain. She practically ran to the kitchen and began snatching open the drawers, even yelling directions at the robots despite never having asked for their help before. She knew she had to remain calm for Tommy's sake; she couldn't let her emotions get the best of her. When she found the bottle, she also took a bottle of water and quickly returned to her side. "'Kay, lift your head a little, can ya do that?" Carefully, she slid her hand underneath his head, gently feeding him two pills and assisting him in swallowing in that position so he wouldn't choke.

Erik: "Come," he said again. Though it was a risk using powers anywhere in Star City and this was not the time for a confrontation, Erik did not have time to simply walk to the city limits and go from there. Without warning or explanation, he lifted both Thierry and himself off the ground and took off from the balcony. He both did not trust him to get there on his own and knew that he had the ability to travel more quickly, anyway. He was silent all the way back to the bunker. Near the entrance, he saw the unmistakable signs of blood on the ground.

Tommy: Tommy swallowed the two pills, which would have been a drop in the bucket even if he didn't have incredibly fast metabolism. "More," he said immediately. He'd had to close his eye again. The light was disorienting, and his head was pounding. To be honest, what he wanted to do was go to sleep, but through all of the other shit he had going on he figured if he did that he wouldn't wake up again. There was no way he didn't have at least a concussion. No way.

Thierry: Thierry was no stranger to flying, but he was in his human form and therefore helpless, so he held onto Erik tightly so he wouldn't fall. He also said nothing on the way there, seeming to understand the importance of the situation in a way that would seem odd. His heartbeat quickened when he saw the blood on the ground in front of the bunker and his grip on Magneto tightened subconsciously as he inhaled. "What happened??"

Anna: Hesitating, Anna fished out more pills for Tommy. She knew that his metabolism meant that he needed more than the average person would, but she was scared he would fall asleep. She gave him two more, her voice soft. "Give it some time to work. If ya still hurt, I'll give ya another one, 'kay? But ya can't fall asleep, y'hear? Keep talkin' to me, Tommy."

Erik: "You're going to tell me." Erik got them inside the bunker. He had to assume that Anna had gone back inside. As soon as they were properly inside, he could hear her talking. "I'm here," he said immediately, and practically ran to where she was by the sofa. He was not prepared for the sight of his grandson in that state. Erik had seen terrible things in his life. He'd witnessed countless deaths and caused many. He had seen the full, horrific extent of what humanity and mutantkind were capable of doing to themselves and each other. But it was different when it was someone he cared about, and certainly when it was his family. His hands balled into fists at his sides and he knelt down by the sofa. "I'm here, Thomas. I'll take care of this."

Tommy: "Mmhm," Tommy muttered. He didn't hear anyone else come in. In the few seconds between Anna telling him to talk and his grandfather kneeling down beside him, he must have started to drift off. He opened his eye again, still not understand how he was there, of all places. He'd never even been to the place his grandfather retreated to after the riots - didn't have a clue where it was, in fact. "Hurts," he told him, "everywhere."

Thierry: Once they were inside, Thierry followed Magneto silently, not seeming Tommy until he reached the couch. He gasped and started to move forward, his hands beginning to shake. "Tommy," his voice was much, much more emotive than it had ever been before."What happened to you? How - how did -" His first thought was that it was Penguin and he did not hesitate to tell that to Magneto. "Penguin did this. I know he did."

Anna: As soon as Erik arrived, Anna finally managed to relax, sitting back on her heels even though her hand remained on Tommy's forehead. She set the glass of water on the ground. "I gave him somethin' for the pain. I didn't wanna give him too much... or he might fall asleep." She'd never seen Erik like this before, except when he'd visited her in the hospital. This was Tommy, his grandson, and she felt her throat tighten when she thought of how he must feel.

Erik: Erik pressed his lips into a hard, thin line when he looked at Thierry. "Why do you say that?" He knew already it wasn't the case. He'd never crossed paths with this 'Penguin,' and had no idea why Tommy would have, either. He saw the letter and the card Anna had mentioned in the floor beside her and grabbed it, shoving it against Thierry's chest. "Joker did this. And you're going to tell me why." He reached up and pushed Tommy's hair away from the wound on his head, then made some gesture to one of the robots that were gathered around Anna. It sped away and returned with a large box. Walking into a hospital and seeking the care of a doctor had not been an option for Erik for a long time. He'd taught himself to do a great many things beyond basic first aid, though he knew already that Tommy's injuries were beyond his abilities to deal with. Still, he started to clean the wound as best he could.

Tommy: When he saw Thierry, he was sure he must have passed out again. Everything still hurt, but maybe it was just so bad that it was invading his dreams now, too. He didn't get the chance to ask him why he was there, or how, before Erik poured something over the wound on his head. It took his breath away and he tried to squirm in the other direction, which only brought a fresh wave of sharp pain in one of his arms.

Thierry: Thierry tried to move toward Tommy, but he was stopped by Anna, who shielded him and prevented Thierry from coming any closer. "I..." He looked at Erik, speechless, and had to force himself to stumble through a partial explanation. "Because something happened to me, and Tommy... he... he was going to do something about it." He started to explain more, but then Erik slapped the note on his chest and he took it quickly. Scanning the contents, he felt even MORE confused - and terrified. "I don't know! I don't... I had no idea this would happen! Joker, he-he must know that I've betrayed him, and he did this to Tommy to get back at ma. That's - that's the only thing I can think of..."

Anna: Anna quickly moved in front of Tommy when the boy tried to approach. She'd heard the accusation and anger in Erik's voice and she wasn't about to let him get to Tommy. Frowning, she looked at Erik, not sure what to think of the boy's explanation. “Ain’t Joker the one who-who made that broadcast with ya?” She couldn't help but sound slightly disdainful at the memory.

Erik: "Why would Joker use Tommy to get back at you?" It was not as if he had all of the details of his grandson's personal life. He spoke with Tommy more often than his brother, but it was not as though he knew the ins and outs of his daily life. He was aware that he and Thierry knew one another, but it stopped there. He shook his head at Anna when she asked. "We haven't had contact since. I cannot guarantee it, but I don't think this had anything to do with me. But it does now." Joker and his people would regret it swiftly.

Tommy: "Wasn't you," Tommy told Thierry. He forced himself to stay still as his grandfather wrapped clean gauze around his head, covering the wound now that it was cleaned. The painkillers were doing nothing. He had no idea how much time had passed, or how much longer he was supposed to wait on them. "I did some-something."

Thierry: "Because we're... friends," Thierry said softly, even though they were more than that, but he wouldn't say so in front of these people. He assumed Tommy wouldn't want anyone to know. When he said THAT, he frowned. "What do you mean...?"

Anna: Pressing her lips together, Anna couldn't stand seeing Tommy in this much pain. She wanted to give him more painkillers, but at the same time, the thought of him falling asleep terrified her. "We gotta take him to the hospital, Erik. His arms... his-his legs..."

Erik: "You did what?" Erik asked Tommy. It didn't actually matter. There was nothing he could have done that would merit or excuse this, no reason he could give that would not end with Erik ripping someone apart for this. "We're not going to a hospital. I can't go with him. I can't trust him. Moving him is too dangerous, besides. We'll bring someone here if we have to."

Tommy: "Guy with a bat...stickers...didn't know he worked for Joker." He took in a deep breath, then another. "Just me. Not you." Neither Thierry or his grandfather had anything to do with this. It was his own rash stupidity.

Thierry: Taking a deep breath, Thierry stepped back, even though his instinct was to go the other way. Even though this might have nothing to do directly, the fact that he'd worked for Joker at all made him feel responsible. "That is Jonny Frost," he said quietly. The bat gave him away. Jonny and Harley were the only henchmen who carried bats.

Anna: "Erik! I will go with him. I will make sure nothin' happens to him. We can't - we can't help him any more than this, and he needs medical assistance. Ya can trust me." Even though Erik was jaded, Anna knew that not all hospitals were opposed to mutants. She'd been in the hospital, after all, and the doctors had assisted her despite being afraid to touch her due to her own unique power.

Erik: "I said no," he told Anna more sharply than he'd intended. "Find someone to bring here. I'll pay them whatever they want. I don't want him out of my sight." It was not that he didn't trust her to do it, but it would never be the same as being there himself. He turned toward Thierry. "Tell me where I can find Jonny Frost."

Tommy: Tommy didn't care what the guy's name was. It didn't matter anymore. He couldn't undo any of it, and even if he could he wasn't sure he'd have been able to walk away in that alley while a whole group of people beat the hell out of one guy. "Tired," he said after a few beats of silence. "I'm tired."

Thierry: "Vagabonds." Thierry did not know of the island. It was the only place he could think of where he saw Jonny and Harley on a regular basis. "But he is always with Joker. So is Harley. They are the only two he seems to... tolerate." It was the only word he could think of, as Joker was not the sort who exhibited a soft spot for anyone. "But - But Harley is pregnant. Don't hurt her." He liked Harley; he couldn't help it. She had always been kind to him, even though he knew she would kill him if she knew what he'd been doing. When Tommy spoke, he looked at him and held his breath, resisting the urge to say anything to betray just how upset he was for the state he was in. Instead, he dug his fingernails into his palms and remained silent.

Anna: Anna's eyes flashed and she jumped up, but stayed in front of Tommy. "You want me to take the time to go find someone while the kid might have a concussion? If he falls asleep he might not wake up! We don't got time for this!" Even as she said it, she was snatching up her coat. "You better keep him awake. And I'm not goin' to wast time lookin' for a mutant. I'm bringin' the first doctor I find. I hope your stubborn ass don't kill him!" She wasn't going to waste more time arguing. Storming to the portal, she slammed her hand on the button to get it to open.

Erik: Erik did not take the time to snap back at Anna. He would keep Tommy awake, and do whatever else needed to be done, but he wouldn't be removed from the bunker. "If she had a hand in this, she'll be dealt with. I am making no promises to you." He did not mean to seek her out, but he wouldn't go further than that. He put his hand against the side of Tommy's face. "Stay awake. Do you want me to bring your mother here?" She needed to know, but perhaps not yet. She could get...erratic, especially when it came to Tommy and Billy, and that was not something that anyone wanted.

Tommy: Tommy forced himself to open his good eye again. He was right. Had to stay awake. How bizarre the scene in the bunker was had finally started to set in. Thierry being there had been confusing, but he hadn't had the energy to question it. It was finally hitting him how little sense it made. "Why...how do you know...?" he finally asked him. "Why are you here?" Why did he know so easily who the man with the bat had been? Joker's words came back to him, unwelcome and unwanted. From now on, assume everyone in the city is working for me.

Thierry: He couldn't bring himself to respond to Tommy's question. Thierry swallowed past a lump in his throat. It was Anna's words that roused him from that state and his gaze snapped up. "No - find Josh... Josh Foley. He is a mutant, like - like me. He helped me. And he knows how to heal other mutants."

Anna: Anna was about to step into the pod, her entire body shaking with anger, when she heard Thierry's words. Frowning, she didn't respond even though she had full intentions to locate Josh immediately. She stepped into the capsule and went to the surface. Star City wasn't very far, but right now it might as well be.

Erik: He should have thought of Josh himself. He knew that he was in the city and had directed Emma to him already. His mind was going too many directions at once, and he'd missed that one. When Thierry did not answer Tommy, Erik decided to do it for him. He was not trying to keep his secrets now. "Thierry is a mutant. We met by chance when he came too close to this place. He informed me that he worked for Joker, and I brought him here for answers." He adjusted the bandage on Tommy's head and reached for the bottle of painkillers. He did not know how long it would be before Anna returned, but in the mean time it was clear that Tommy was still in pain. His abilities were nearly identical t Pietro's, and Erik felt comfortable enough to shake out a few more of the pills to give to him. He helped him swallow them much the same way that Anna had.

Tommy: When his grandfather said all of that, Tommy was just silent. Thierry hadn't told him anything. None of that. He didn't even know he was a mutant. It was not as if Tommy had gone out of his way to hide anything from him. He'd used his powers in front of him, he'd told him about his family, and he'd have probably said more than that if Thierry had asked. He didn't know how to respond to it, and so just belatedly said, "Don't tell Wanda." Not yet. She...it felt like she smothered him.

#c: sospeedy #c: masterofmagnetismx #c: im-not-a-liar #chatzy

[something-very-special]

Ask Response-stravaganza!

So I got a buuuunch of Asks in the last couple of days and a lot of them are spoiler-y by nature. Rather than hiding them all until I feel more comfortable addressing them (which won’t be for a couple of months, honestly), they’re all going under a big ol’ SPOILERS AHOY! read more break.

So here we go.

SPOILERS AHOY!

Anonymous: I agree that 2B and 9S's bond is mainly that of a broken family but there also seem to be a few hints at attraction there (e.g. the comments about 9S's heart rate increasing at the beginning of route B). Also, even though Adam's line certainly referred to "kill", the wording itself does carry some ambiguity and connotations that seem intentional - considering the hatred and love aspects of 9S's (admittedly complex) feelings, Adam may be referring to several things here, possibly all at once.

I absolutely believe the context was meant to be ambiguous. This is also why it’s really funny seeing how people reacted to it, and how they kind of project onto it. (And I certainly had the same reaction the first time I saw it, hah hah.)

I like to think that the censored word is actually a number of verbs all at once -- ‘fuck’ and ‘kill’ certainly aren’t the only two four-letter verbs out there -- which is why it’s censored the way it is; it’s an accusation of multiple natures, potentially meaning multiple things, open to a bevy of equally valid interpretation.

But.

In context of the story, whatever is hidden behind that line of asterisks is something that 9S doesn’t want to acknowledge. If it were something related to love or even lust, 9S has already proven that he gets flustered in such a context-- the aforementioned ‘heart rate’ response, and his conversation with the Little Sister. However, in conversation with Adam, his response is violent. It’s violent denial. I don’t think he’d be so aggressive if Adam’s main point had not been trying to stir up his more negative feelings.

So, in context of everything Adam may have said, and in context of what we as the audience could take away from it? I do believe ‘you want to **** 2B’ can (and was intended to) mean a broad range of things. But in context of what 9S heard? Not so nice.

Anonymous: thank you for your in depth thoughts about 9S. I found him to be really unlikeable at first and then somewhat tolerable by the end. but my final lasting impression of him was that he just unsettled me for some reason i could not pin point. With your thoughts, I was able to understand him a bit more. though he will still be my least liked character, i can't deny his whole arc is really thought provoking (also you mentioned that A2 was very underutilized, a sentiment I concur with whole heartedly)             

Oh, I’m glad. I know 9S can come across as being a brat (which I think is more of a knee-jerk reaction to his youthful design), and a racist jerk (which is definitely intended in-game, by his dismissal of the very concept of the robots having their own egos), but he’s definitely got a lot more going on. I had the fortune of accidentally tripping the Mother and Son quest early, so other than 9S being kind of a jerk toward Pascal the first interaction I saw between him and the machines was trying to comfort the little child machine, which was adorable and probably instrumental in my own opinion of him. (Made watching him go from “Shh, shh, don’t cry” to “I WILL MURDER EVERYTHING” pretty disturbing, and heart-wrenching.)

Yeah, A2 needed more love. I think I understand why she was kind of incidental, but still...

kantan-kt:                                                      Do you think that 9S died in route C? If you continue to route E, the pods tell the player that all yoRHa black boxes are offline. Doesn't that mean that A2's sacrifice was in vain? ;~;  But then again, he did stop his data upload to the yoRHa server so maybe there's a chance that he's alive?            

When you enter Ending E from the Chapter Select, it continued directly from Ending C, implying heavily that his black box was offlined. However, A2′s work seemed to be less about keeping him alive (which wouldn’t really be accomplished by hacking into him, since the damage kind of came from repeatedly stabbing him in the final fight) and more about retaining his memories and eliminating the logic virus the clone-arm imparted into him-- saving his soul, if you will, even if the body still died. Kind of ties in to the considerations of something greater than themselves, and the direct contemplation in a few of the sidequests about heaven, and whether they, as artificial life, would qualify for such a thing if it exists.

So even if you ignore Ending E and its possibility of restoring the three characters -- which obviously A2 would not have had any knowledge of, herself -- no. Even though 9S is also confirmed dead at the end of it, her work was not in vain.

Anonymous: On the BBE's Artbook, Commander talks about Jackass making an android combined from two other androids...Do you guess who they are talking about? 

I haven’t taken a chance to really look through the art book yet (didn’t want to spoil myself), but I’ve seen this mentioned and I have to say I don’t actually have a guess. I can’t think of anybody in the game, including sidequests, that would match this description. The only thing I can think of is her lamenting the death of ‘White’ on the bunker, but I can’t think of anything solid.

I look forward to somebody figuring it out, though. That’s pretty awesome, in a legitimately terrifying kind of way.

Anonymous: I thought about something and would like to hear your two cents on it. I personally find that 2B lacks character development, she barely says anything about her throughout the entire game, however, once you learn what her true purpose is, you have to look at the core of most sidequests in the game to (indirectly) learn about her since said sidequests are more or less related to 2B (and 9S to some extent). The "YoRHa Betrayers" and "Amnesia" are the most obvious that come to mind. Any thoughts?  

This is a two-parter, but the Asks split themselves quite neatly.

Regarding this, this is one of the things I really like about both this game and the original (and I remember hints of this in Drakengard, too). There’s plenty of clear development between the characters, but there’s also a lot of unspoken, subtle stuff. I’ve recently mentioned the relationship between Nier and the members of his party, and what’s really brilliant about it is that most of the interpersonal bonding is done without dialogue, or else entirely through subtext. The entire chunk of game from the fight against No. 6 to the post-fight against Kaine in the Lost Shrine is brimming with gorgeous body language and perfectly constructed dialogue that never feels the need to speak too much about what it’s trying to say. It requires-- I don’t want to say thought because it sounds pretentious, but it does require paying attention, especially for the relationship between Emil and Kaine (which turns out to be incredibly powerful even, what, 8000 years later, and I’m completely sold on it for this one hour-long stretch of game).

The same occurs with 2B. We’re introduced to her in a very mechanical context, and she comes across as being stoic, flat, no-nonsense. It serves a pretty good foil to 9S being the most emotional and ‘human’ of the main characters, but 2B herself isn’t emotionless. I marked this even back in the demo; she says ‘emotions are prohibited’ but becomes extremely worked up over 9S being hurt. Seems like a clear contradiction, especially when they ‘just met’, and given how generally well-written and strong the narrative is seems too contradictory to have been unintentional, especially for being right at the start of the game.

There are definitely hints and intrigue throughout, and these little bits from the sidequests and from her more errant dialogue and reactions paint a very interesting and complex picture, especially in conjunction with the “Amnesia” sidequest, which not only reveals the existence of the E-series YoRHa (which 2B dismisses, incidentally) but that they are highly psychologically unstable due to the rather grisly task presented to them. (That was all one sentence and I’m sorry.)

I quite like how her characterization was ultimately treated. It’s not overt, but there are enough indications of what lay beneath to make her at least interesting, and once you’re given full context about her nature it retroactively makes her more unusual decisions and reactions quite a bit more fascinating, and telling.

I was running out of space with my sidequest ask earlier, I thought about another obvious one that might be related to 9S? It's the "Confidential Intel" which ends up pretty badly, where some resistance member wants to build an S android since he always wanted a family, which can be associated with 9S wishes in a way? Maybe this is too far fetched but it all feels too coincidental that most sidequests share the same themes as the main characters' struggle, if that makes any sense?

Oh! Yes, actually, I completely follow. I admit I didn’t make that connection (although I did that quest with 2B so I wasn’t yet in the realm of familial pining), but it does make sense. I imagine something could also be read into the Resistance member’s desire to have somebody to protect.

...now that I think about it, I wonder if an E-unit was sent after them? The Scanner has confidential intelligence, after all, something that could be catastrophic if leaked, and while I interpreted his ‘p-please...’ at the end of the quest being a misfiring need to get away from his ‘family’, it might have been linked to their request: “Don’t tell anybody about us”, “Please”, because if somebody learns where they are the Scanner has to be eliminated, and his protector will go with him.

Got a bit away from the point. But yes, I think that’s entirely possible. Thank you for bringing it to my attention!

#NieR: Automata #Meta #Talkin' 'bout vidya games #Seriously though you guys give me really good discussion. I love this.