#nonsam aces

[saffigon]

since pride month is coming up or whatever:

include aspecs in your pride. include aces and aros and those that are aspec in other ways; include those that are somewhere on the spectrum; include aros that aren't ace; include aroaces; include aces that aren't aro; include aspecs in relationships; include aspecs that never want relationships; include cishet aspecs; include aspec identities you don't hear about often; include our flags and include our voices

we are as much a part of this community as any other queer person

#aspec #aroallo #alloaro #aromantic #aro #arospec #asexual #ace #acespec #queer #lgbtq #pride #nonsam aros #nonsam aces #alloace

[ryanyflags]

Non-SAM-aroace / ay alt flags :)

These all use colors from @neopronouns' ay flags [link], and @arokill's general non-SAM flag [link].

The 5 stripe flags follow the format of these non-SAM-ace [link] and non-SAM-aro [link] flags. 1st one is just blue, while the 2nd one uses grey / is darker.

The 7 stripe flags are based on my non-SAM-ace / non-SAM-aro alt flags [link]. The 1st one uses grey / is lighter, while the 2nd one is more blue/darker.

Basically, I just wanted non-SAM-aroace (aka ay) flags that matched the non-SAM-ace/aro flags that I listed. I like the original ay flags too.

#ay #non sam aroace #nonsam aroace #non sam ace #nonsam ace #non sam aro #nonsam aro #aroace #pride flag #alt flag

[shmaroace]

aspec identities are literally the footnote of the lgbtqia+ community. like if you're lucky, you might encounter information about asexuals, and if you're really lucky, you might learn something completely wrong about aros!

#every piece of aro information i have found that's not from someone who is actually aro is so fucking wrong #everyone thinks being aro means you don't desire a relationship. WRONG. #and then you get into the nuance of the aro community with nonsams and alloaros and loveless aros and romo-aros and all that #it's a lot for the allos to handle so they just ignore us :/ #aro #aromantic #arospec #ace #asexual #acespec #aroace #aspec

[nerdyenby]

The aspec club at my school is 80% trans/nonbinary so I’m curious

#aro and ace options for alloaros alloaces and nonSAM aspecs :) #polls #poll #aspec #ace #aro #aroace #aromantic #asexual #nonbinary #trans #transgender #lgbtq #lgbtqia #lgbtq+ #queer

[strawberrymeriadoc]

I know this sounds weird but I think I’m a non-SAM aroace. Like, the two identities feel like one and the same to me, but I don’t prefer one over the other in order to be seen as either “non-Sam aro” or “non-Sam ace”. It’s just one thing to me and I end up using ace, aro, and aroace in different spaces depending on which is most relevant. But there is no split to me and I only use aroace so others can know that I’m both. But it sounds as weird to me as having to say I’m Bibi if I was bisexual and biromantic...

#aroace #nonsam aro #non Sam ace #non Sam aroace #asexual #aromantic

[soong-type-notinuse]

when someone calls me a "non-SAM ace" (which has happened before), i literally don't know what they mean.

do they mean that i experience my sexual and romantic orientation as one, referring to both as "asexual"? because that ain't it.

do they mean that experience *all* my orientations, even the ones beyond romantic and sexual as one single unit, calling it "asexual"? because that ain't it either.

do they mean that i'm "just ace" and nothing else? because that's not it either. i'm gay.

do they mean that i'm an ace without a romantic orientation? now that's me.

besides the fact that this term doesn't even come from aspec communities but from our enemies, the terms "SAM" and "non-SAM" really don't communicate much at all.

i'm not "non-SAM". i'm bi and ace. i'm varioriented. i'm quoiromantic. i'm a varioriented bi ace without a romantic orientation. i'm a quoiromantic bi ace. i'm many things but don't you dare call me "non-SAM". my attraction is neither "split" nor "non-split". my aceness and my pan-ness aren't "split off" from anything. they're not part of a whole. they are whole on their own.

there are many other useful terms that don't use this horrible term created by our oppressors. "varioriented" and "perioriented" are both older than the term "split attraction model". recently, people came up with the term "unit".

#ace #acespec #ace stuff #ace things #aspec #sam #nonsam #non-sam #queer #LGBT #LGBTQ+ #mogai #asexual #asexuality

[aroconfusion]

so ive been rereading loveless, as one does, and its made me think about the aspec community a lot

im aroace and i relate to georgia a lot but also we have had very different experiences . i never wanted romance and i was more relieved about finally figuring out my sexuality than sad abt missing out on romance and sex. when i was questioning, i was confused and uncertain and i relate to a good chunk of her thoughts when she was questioning. we also have similar personalities too tbh. there was so much i related too and so much that i didnt

i think that loveless has rlly shown me that every aspec has such a different and unique experience and we still come together to support each other, from oriented aspecs to loveless aros to nonsam aces and i think that is so beautiful and i love that about this community.

anyways alice osemans books are making me emotional again and i had to write abt the wonderful aspec community

#loveless #osemanverse #aromantic #aro #asexual #ace #aroace #aromantic asexual #aspec #doing too much #srry abt this i just love being aroace #<3 #i’m not eloquent at all but oh well

[a-romantic--aromantic]

<- in the process of making an aspec/arospec kink server.

also kink isnt inherently sexual and should be allowed at pride, and the work aces have done involving kink is super important to me.

more info under the cut

from what i can tell so far its going to be a 16+ server with roles to opt out of sharing spaces with people under 18, and for people bodily over 18 to opt in to nsfw channels.

from what i can tell, the server will contain channels on

16+ dynamics-vs-attraction kink-education ongoing-consent (how consent and nv consent works) experience-in-kink (SFW ONLY) purity/morality culture** (name in progress) *sex-education possibly but unsure atm - 18+ seeking 18+kink-experience

im working on the icon. im aro so the first one is my first instinct, esp because my editing software Sucks, and the diamond on the second looks odd. the symbol is the bdsm (/at this point generalized kink) symbol.

i like the first one, though i would likely make the aspec line thicker if i were to redo it. i want aces welcome but like im nonsam aro and the aspec flag meshes funny. looking for edits and ideas. will not accept ideas related to aro/ace but not aplatonic. also an image description would be fantastic i dont know how to describe these At All

[aroaceconfessions]

(sorry for th negativity, long day and these thoughts have been stirring for a LONG time...)

I'm so so so so tired of the SAM now being the default in the community. I've bottled it up bc it's not the majority opinion and we're all tired of being erased but a post going around rn brought it all back up and I wanted to vent. It's just sum1 expressing frustration that canon ace characters that also lack romantic attraction aren't instead called aroace, which I understand but man. It had almost a thousand notes with every1 agreeing but my only thought was that if I made a nonsam aspect character, would that be considered bad rep to most of the aspec community? If they lacked any attraction but was just aro like me, would I just be hurting my community more? I feel like the way we approach our identities changed after all the exclus shit and now I almost feel I don't belong or. somthing. Sorry if that's guilt trippy, I don't mean it to at all. We're barely acknowledged, so I get it but idk. The most I see nonsams talked abt is when sum1 says not to forget us... but then non of the ways ppl talk reflect it if that makes sense? It's still treated as if u have to be aroallo or alloace or aroace and tagging a post abt sexual attraction as aro or romantic as ace is bad, even if it applies for u. On ADoV ppl posted abt how much it sucks 2 see them tagged as aromantic, even tho for me it was really really nice :( I like celebrating ace days as a nonsam aro, it's not quite MY day but it's close. And on aro days the tag is full of ppl reminding us not to mention or tag asexuality too. I just wish we could go back to the aro and ace having blurry boundaries w/out necessarily being aroace yknow? There's so much focus on separating now that those of us that can't are just left behind. Again. But on the other hand as an aro I know we're all sick of erasure so I get us being more defensive lol. Idk sorry again for the longass negative message, u can delete if it's too much

#aromantic #asexual #aroace #arospec #acespec #aspec #aroacespec #arose #representation #split attraction model #SAM

[urpurplehairedsage]

Do you have any tips or advice for aromantic people who are questioning whether they are nonsam aro, alloaro or aroace? Or, if you feel comfortable, could you share your journey on figuring out you are alloaro and not ace or nonsam? - fictional.

Hi anon, thanks for the lovely ask! ✨️

Since I've identified as all of the above labels at one point in time, I guess I could tell you my journey of how I eventually discovered I was alloaro.

Just wanna preface this by saying that this is merely my experience, so naturally it won't represent others' paths and journeys. I do hope for those reading and are trying to figure themselves out, that this may be used as reference <3

So let's start by the beginning— I was 16 and at this point I'd identified as ace. Even back then, I knew I hadn't had any crushes or other inclinations to be romantically involved with people; I was fairly certain that this wasn't ever going to be the case in my life, so I took on the aro label on the side (aroace).

I ran with the aroace label all the way till I was 18. Meanwhile my sapphic feelings started to kick in, and I began questioning my attraction toward women (which I'd say I experienced pretty ambiguously). I assumed my attraction overall to be alterous, and so identified as an sapphic (oriented) aroace.

Around this time though, this is where I started to have a lil' questioning crisis. A little sapphic, aro existential crisis, if you will. If I hadn't been fantasizing about non-romantic relationships with women before, this is when it really started to pop off.

With all of this going on in my head, I wasn't really sure about my ace-ness anymore. However I definitely didn't feel allo either; all I knew was that I was aro as hell, and that's all, didn't really care about the rest anymore. That's when the non-SAM label felt really safe to me. Ace or not, didn't really matter to me anymore. From there on out, I ID'ed as a non-SAM aro lesbian (→ for those unfamiliar, feel free check out the oriented (non-sam) aro label!)

Now, not all alloaros have dealt with shame or guilt upon discovering themselves and I certainly do not want to perpetuate that notion; I know plenty that have had no problem accepting themselves as they are, free of those negative feelings, but for me guilt and shame was unfortunately present, but on a more unconscious level.

I had to sit myself down a few times and also navigate the alloaro spaces to really come to the conclusion that the reason I resonated with them so much wasn't by chance, it was because I was one of them. If I really think about it, the type of relationships I want to form happened to reflect that as well.

There may have not been anyone in particular my sexual attraction was targeted at (which contrary to what a lot of people (esp. aces) say, doesn't have to be the case), but I'm confident enough to say that I, in fact, do experience sexual attraction (to women).

8 months after that reality check, I'm here, being the alloaro lesbian I was destined to be lol.

I wrote this with the intention of not making it too long to read, but hopefully this helps someone out there. [TL:DR] When trying to figure yourself out, testing out labels and navigating their respective communities really helps. Feel free to reach out to its members too; after all part of you are the reason why I'm so comfortable with who I am now.

I wish those on their own journey of self-discovery the best of luck <3

-Y.

#🧙🏾‍♀️'s answers #aromantic #aro #arospec #aromanticism #alloaro #aroallo #aromantic allosexual #queer #lgbtqia+ #queer advice #🍍🍍🍍

[saffigon]

Reminder to aspecs, our solidarity is our strength.

Non-SAM Aro and AroAllo solidarity Loving & Lovequeer and Loveless & Heartless solidarity AroAllo and AlloAce solidarity Romance Favorable and Romance Repulsed solidarity Sex Favorable and Sex Repulsed solidarity AroAce and AroAllo solidarity Romance Indifferent and Sex Indifferent solidarity Aplatonic and Alloplatonic Aspec solidarity Romo Aro and Heartless solidarity Partnering Polyamorous and Nonparterning / Nonamorous solidarity Amid and AroAce solidarity Cupio and Apothi solidarity Fray & Lith and Demi solidarity

Any and all aspec solidarity. We are not each other's enemy. Support each other, no matter how "opposite" your aspec identities may be.

#aromantic #aro #arospec #asexual #ace #acespec #aplatonic #apl #aplspec #nonsam aro #aroallo #alloaro #heartless aro #lovequeer aro #loveless aro #arolovic #loving aro #alloace #aroace #acearo #romo aro #amid #aromid #acemid #nonamorous #nonpartnering #nonam

[melodyofthevoid]

2,3,8 for the aro ask

Where do you fit in the aro community (ex, alloaro / aroace / nonSAM aro / etc)?

I am aroace! I like to describe my sexuality/preferences and even gender as Error 404: file not found

Do you consider yourself lgbt+?

You bet your ass. Exclusionists can honestly take a hike. There's not more safety in kicking people out. We're all impacted by the standards of culture in some way or another. Why make life harder?

Do you associate anything with being ‘aromantic culture’?

Hmm. General distaste for valentines day /j. That is something I'll admit, I'm less acquainted with aro culture than I am with ace culture. There's the cakes and dragons and garlic bread but with Aros... idk. In fairness I didn't consider myself aro until a few years ago. I knew I was ace but thought... idk. That I'd maybe fall in love?

I do need to try and connect more with the aro community. They're coming back around after all the... really wretched stuff that happened a few years back with the exclusionary bullshit.

#melody rambles

[mossy-covered-bones]

Yknow i thought i was ace but i have no clue anymore and i am stubbornly refusing to touch the concept of my sexuality with a ten foot pole so. Nonsam aro pog ig

#sev rambles

[nerdyenby]

#arospec awareness week #aromantic #poll #polls

[malecacidd]

Im so tired of "casual" arophobia. If you're going to be arophobic at least be fucking honest about it and don't pretend you're not.

#like stop shutting down aro hcs and then lifting up every other one #stop pretending that aro is just a subset of ace bc youre excluding aroallos and nonsam aros #and when aros comolain about something dont do the 'oh yeah i get that way more than you haha' bullshit #people are allowed to complain without being told others get it worse #and god. if you're going to be an exclusionist at least own up to it #dont be like 'oh yea aros are valid they just arent lgbt. i support tho!!' like shut the fuck UP #own the fact that youre arophobic or dont be arophobic #'exclusionist' is a term that arophobes (and acephobes and transphobes etc) made up so that ppl didnt associate them with homophobes #im so tired #stop saying that aro+gay/bi/pan ppl are lgbt just bc of their sexuality. stop acting like aro is the least important part of their identity. #im lgbt bc im a lesbian AND bc im aro #aromantic is the label i have that affects me the most. its not secondary to me being a lesbian #and STOP. SAYING. AROALLOS. ARE. PREDATORY. #I'm so TIRED #just #if youre going to be arophobic #be honest about it and stop dancing around the label and stop pretending like it doesnt matter #im sorry i normally dont post aro stuff on my main but i refuse to put any negative stuff on my aro blog its a safe space so this is going #here i guess #arophobia #aro discourse #also just like exclusionist the phrase 'aro discourse' was also made to cover up arophobia and make it seem less bad #just using the tag bc a lot of ppl have it blocked #also this can be rbed tho idk why you would #im just begging alloros not to clown #and im not fighting with an arophobe today youll just be blocked #tw cursing #cursing tw #cursing

[soong-type-notinuse]

in today's episode i talk about why i don't like the split attraction model even though i'm bi-ace.

#asexual #ace #bi #bisensual #bialterous #asexuality #acespec #bi ace #mspec #multispec #pan #panalterous #pansensual #bisexual #pansexual #split attraction #split attraction model #nonsam #nonsam ace #non sam ace #podcast #queer #mogai #lgbtq