#not a fun time in my life or her life | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

suttttton · 2 years

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me 🤝 my mom undiagnosed anxiety disorders

#the older i get the clearer it becomes that me and my mom catastrophize about things very similarly #difference is i found healthy coping mechanisms while my mom found homophobic death cult evangelical christianity #of course this realization makes me feel very bad for my mom because like. i get it.#she tells me that she worries about me and i know she doesn't mean the normal way moms worry about their kids i know she actually means #that she has a creeping suspicion that my life choices are going to send me to hell and she feels powerless to stop it #and her brain will not let her think about anything else so 24/7 its just alarms blaring #and because she's constructed her entire belief system around having anxiety she's like. this fear i feel is a message from god.#and i have no idea how to help her #like????#she's literally believed these things fro her entire life giving them up feels like the end of the world #and her WHOLE FAMILY is there with her so even if she could realize she'd be happier without these beliefs #she'd immediately have a dozen trusted voices telling her no actually. your anxiety is correct and you're right to afraid all the time #for awhile when i was like. 18-19. the major question i had about my childhood was WHY didn't my mom never take me to therapy #because yeah okay she came from a culture where therapy isn't trusted and god is supposed to fix all your mental illnesses #but she read all the parenting books and universally took experts' advice over what she'd learned from her own parents #(because she knew her parents hadn't done a great job and didn't want to repeat their mistakes)#and she KNEW i was REALLY bad. i was crying all the time having her drive me to the bookstore to get books i thought might help #sending myself into anxious spirals if anyone mentioned death around me #not a fun time in my life or her life #and she DID take me to talk to my pediatrician about it so like??? why did we never see a therapist???#i was 9 i though there was just nothing that could be done but????????#but now i realize that what happened to me back then didn't really scan in my mother's head as something wrong with me #because she was the same way #:/

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bigfatbreak · 12 days

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Birds of a Feather previous / next

#my art #feralnette au #birds of a feather #long tags #sorry I went apeshit in the tags #LETS SAY IT ALL TOGETHER NOW #I - M - A - G - OOOOOOOOO #its fun drawing marinette's back to Alya and having her appear stout and unstoppable and totally logical #and then you see her face and she's like two seconds from completely snapping and is keeping it together by a thread #as a note just because mari feels very certainly abt smth doesnt mean she's right. feelings can be valid and also irrational #in the throes of grief she decided it was better to be alone than to lose someone again so she started pulling away #and lila made pulling away very very very easy to do #shes also vaguely aware she's being unfair in pinning this on alya which is why she started spinning the drain on cockmoth again #legitimately all the shit that's happened to her wouldn't have been so catastrophic if he was never in the picture and she knows it #but the bitterness of her bestie choosing a fantastic liar over her at the worst of times stiiiiiings #alya's personal timing was bad but lila really took advantage of the fact that marinette had been acting off and weird #she basically clocked marinette as being unstable from SOMETHING and made up a lie about her #knowing she wouldn't have the strength to defend herself #between her social life going tachy bc of lila and losing fu in a way that felt like personhood death marinette was really put on the spot #and alya doing her thing of busting in there and assuming her bias is correct was a terrible combo #essentially marinette is highly unstable and alya is just realizing that #busting in and giving her a lecture when she's slightly hysterical and definitely delirious from exhaustion is NOT the way #to show her she's self sabotaging #cuz thats just gonna make her double down on self sabotaging. bc marinette will not accept that she is also a CHIIIIILD

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hychlorions · 25 days

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a what-if i've been thinking about for forever... trucy knowing the truth before anyone could tell her

#trucy wright #apollo justice #ace attorney #.png #ough ough ough how many times has she helped 'ruin' someone's life...#like what if when she was so desperate to help phoenix get acquitted she gets hit in the face with the realization that #she might just be ruining her new-found brother's life too #so yeah. how would she even bring that up #haha hey polly. remember that time i handed you fake evidence. well did you know i saw your bracelet and remembered my mom had one too. fun #by the way did you know she told me she had two and gave one to her first-born who she lost a long time ago #like do we know how much trucy remembers about their mom. no! that's why i think this could work #ough i've wanted to make this comic for so long but i never knew how to format it #well i drew the first panel as warm-up and then was like. why not go all the way....#that way i'd be forced to really think about composition

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strawberri-draws · 1 month

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"Innocence died screaming, Honey ask me, I should know. I slithered here from Eden; Just to sit outside your door"

-From Eden, Hozier

aka: au where they grow old in the dungeon together in their monster forms.

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fantasykiri5 · 5 months

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Hey, if it ain’t broke don’t fit it ammirite?

(I drew this completely of my own volition thinking I had an ask to draw her… ZombieCleo is so powerful she made me think I had an ask asking to draw her and I did it… how magical.)

These asks ARE still open btw! It may take me a long ass time to get to them, but I’ve started working on the other three I currently have and I think these are really fun so feel free to send more in!

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welcometogrouchland · 1 year

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Also I am. Constantly forgetting how fucking funny Hunter is. We never give him enough credit for how funny he is because his life is so fucked up but I swear 90% of his lines are just bit after bit after bit. He's not even trying either. Anytime he actively tries to make a joke it falls flat but if you just put him in a Scenario he'll find a way to be so over invested and yet out of touch/at odds with whatever's going on. He's so autistic

#the owl house #ramblings of a lunatic #i forget hunters character voice A Lot #plus the most recent ep is always whats most clear in my mind (so rn that's ftf) and he's obvs much more angsty in that one #idk ppl credit thanks to them as the first time Hunter was like happy and silly #but i highkey think asias was the prelude to that. like i think the events of that day are so vivid and special to hunter #precisely bc it's the first time he's interacted with witches his age in a non hostile or strained way #it's the first time on screen we see him have fun doing something that isn't deranged #yeah whatever souls are made of his and willows are the same. but more importantly her gus and the rest make him laugh #that's important for the guy canonically having the worst day of his life Every Day #part of why huntlow appealed to me initially was that it was hunters first taste of like. normal teenagedom #not the romance with willow (cause that's barely an undercurrent in asias) but flyer derby and hexside in general #and that's part of why willow and later gus r like. his safe space #and thus why it's so significant that he goes out of his way to protect (keep them safe) too #anyway enough hunter thoughts for tonight. i love him but this isn't my Brand

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personalzombie-tv · 4 months

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y'know actually we as a fandom really passed over Gem's whole void infected skin WAY too fast actually can we talk more about Gem's void infected skin cause that could be such an interesting thing to explore

#mcyt #secret life smp #i just think everyone was so busy dealing with hall monitors or people bullying her we didn't have time to appreciate just how cool that wa #which also i will say if you were one of those people you suck #gem's great #my fav fav headcanon for gem is to make her a voidwalker so this is even more fun for me to rotate #nothing coherent yet will update you if that ever happens

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ghostinghome · 11 months

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the girlie !!!

#teruhashi kokomi #shes so fun i love her so muxh #SHE GOT ME OUTTA MY ART BLOCK 🙏🙏#nyways #i watched all 3 season + awakend in the span of like.. 3 days #ITS SUCH A FUN N SILLY SHOW I CANT BELIEVE I ONLY WATCHED IT NOW #uhm tag time :3 #the disasterous life of saiki k #saiki k #the silliest ever #i love her so much have i mentioned that yet #i love all pf the charavters they r all so silly

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shima-draws · 1 month

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HHFHGHHH caught up with the Dungeon Meshi anime…can’t even describe how absolutely fucked up it was to watch Laios have to reassemble the digested bones of his dead sister (that were drenched in her blood) piece by piece. Like. Idk how homie didn’t go through a mental breakdown in the middle of that

#I guess bc reviving the dead is so NORMALIZED in the dungeon #He was like yeah I’ll just. Have fun sorting through my own sister’s bones!! Because she’ll come back to life so it’s fine!!#How do you not get PTSD from that. That would fuck me up SO bad #Even if I knew she’d be coming back to life #After that every time I looked at her I would think ‘I’ve touched every single one of the bones inside you. I’ve seen your SKELETON’#Fucking HELL bro.#Dungeon Meshi #Dungeon Meshi spoilers #Delicious in Dungeon #Shima speaks #Ask to tag #Laios Touden #Falin Touden

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cupiidzbow · 20 days

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we’re autism4autism have i ever mentioned that

#YOU BET MY ASS I WILL SIT AND LISTEN HIM TALK ABOUT THE AERODYNAMIC DIFFERENCES IN PLANES #YOU BET MY ASS I WILL SIT THERE AND LISTEN TO HIM TALK WHILE HE WORKS ON HIS BIKE #literally my favorite thing to do is listen to people talk abt their special interest #I have learned more things in life by hearing people talk then I have ever learned in school #my sister is the reason I am so knowledgeable about w.we i know these all of these wrestlers just by listening to her and I love it ☝🏽#funky hanging on to every word I say as I talk about the regional differences and variants of my tamagotchis #‘have I ever told you about the one where you can send your tama.gotchi to go get a job. you have to give them a resume. they can reject you #‘I am madly in love with you.’#sorry I’m crazy i love this hc so much #THE REASON HE WEARS THE GLASSES ALL THE TIME EVERYWHERE ?? LIGHT SENSITIVITY ISSUES!!!!#THE REASON HE SEEMS SO ECCENTRIC AND ODD AMONG HIS PEERS SOMETIMES? MISSING SOCIAL CUES BABY!!!!!!!#I think it’s fun to think the coolest mf on the island is autistic LIKE I KNOW THATS RIGHTT 🔥🔥🔥🔥#ok sorry for rambling I love talking about this #doodles #self ship #self shipping #bipoc self ship #🦍🏄‍♂️🌊

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thymeofarrival · 5 months

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Gem’s bloodlust is genuinely scary and unsettling and I adore it and her so much

… I hit tag limit on this and I’m not even close to done spilling my thoughts in the tags so I’m going to post so I can copy my tags into real text and keep writing them

#I can’t imagine facing her as one of the uninfected when she’s got my heart rate up just watching from her perspective #she’s a hunter #I’ve written something before about how she talks about murder in the same excited tone as cute decorations #and people sometimes underestimate her because of it despite her reputation as a good fighter #but she’s not a fighter she’s a predator #she’s a hunter and even watching from her perspective sometimes it feels like she’s hunting me #she’s hunting All #and it’s exciting and fun for her #and she needs her pack to some extent but when it gets too big she needs to split off again #idk what’s going on in these tags it’s just. hnnghhh. Red Gem #or even before she went red #just bloodthirsty predator gem reveling in the thrill of the hunt #it’s not nearly as much fun on your own but once you’ve killed a couple people to your side and have the numbers to terrify people #you can do that. you can circle around your prey and corner them and terrify them before you kill them #and it feels like power and it feels like a game and it feels like fun #because it’s not life or death it’s success or failure #but maybe everything is a game to a creature like gem who hops between worlds at will #what if she could leave secret life at any time #like she could hop between empires and hermitcraft at any time #if she can leave then she really is just there to have a chance to enjoy the hunt in a setting where it’s expected #encouraged even #death games as a way to satisfy her bloodlust so it doesn’t spill over someplace where it might Actually Hurt #death games to take the edge off #death games to get a chance to reveal the fangs behind her grin and the sharp points of her antlers #we call her a deer because that’s the closest thing our minds can connect to her appearance #but she’s always been a little too Other for that #oh and now the Void has taken root in her too #it’s claimed her eye and arm #maybe it helped guide her aim #or maybe she’s always been a creature of the space between worlds (what with the way she hops between them)

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cerise-on-top · 2 months

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Ooh, what if Price/Ghost/Gaz/Laswell came across their childhood best friend? Reuniting with reader who was there for them through thick and thin, until they joined the military and lost contact 🙏

I've been reading/re-reading some of your works!! They're so good! Also, I'm sorry those teenagers were pricks to you, hope you have some better days soon!

Hello! I have to say, I'm genuinely surprised anyone reads my rambles in the tags, I didn't think anyone would, but thank you! You don't know how much I appreciate it! Today was already a much better day, which is why I decided to write and post two requests today! This is a lovely request, very nice! Love me some platonic stuff as well! Sometimes all you need is a good friend by your side!

Price, Gaz, Ghost and Laswell Come Across their Childhood Best Friend

Price: He actually thinks about you from time to time, more often than he’d like to admit. You were a good person in his eyes, always there for him no matter what he went through, which is something he could appreciate. His childhood wasn’t particularly bad, but he had some days where he would have loved to simply throw in the towel, which is normal, though. Price was a rowdy guy when he was young, so you likely either went along with some of his ideas or were kind enough to talk him out of them. Either way, he appreciated having you around, so seeing you again would be quite the surprise, he didn’t think he ever would again. If he’s on a mission, then the talk will be kept short, but afterwards he’ll make sure to seek you out again, catch up a bit and ask you how you’ve been. Price didn’t expect to have missed you this much, but he only realized that once he saw you. You’ll either be going to one of the cafes you used to visit nearby, or maybe sit down on a park bench and maybe eat some sandwiches together, just like you used to during the good old times. Since you’d likely be around his age, so roughly 37-38, you’d have a lot to tell. Roughly 22 years you need to catch up on. He’s willing to talk to you, tell you about his career, how he's been doing, about the people he’s met and how he’s feeling. Considering this much time has passed, there’s a good chance you’ve both mellowed out quite a bit, but it isn’t unpleasant, you’re both mature people now. He likes hearing about everything you’ve accomplished, it’s like you became a new person during all those years. It’s so lovely to him, he sort of can’t believe it. Whether it’s a coincidence, or maybe you sought him out, it doesn’t matter, spending time with you again brings back all those memories he thought he had since forgotten about. He laughs, he smiles, he frowns. He’s a bit more expressive with you, but really wants to reminisce about the good old times. Even so, he hopes to be able to see you again more often, so you’ll likely exchange numbers. This time he tries to make sure to not lose contact with you and will text you every once in a while.

Gaz: When he was a child, Gaz was a lot calmer than he is today, a very quiet kid. He had always been a good boy, a gift in the eyes of many, but he wasn’t as active a child as one would imagine. Ergo he didn’t have very many friends until he became older either, but he was loyal to the few he did have. You were one of them. As you slowly started to grow apart, he started to miss you, but didn’t want to bother you either, as much as he would have loved to do so. So I’m sure you can imagine the surprise on his face when he found you at the mall the two of you would hang out in during rainy days. Gaz has become more confident, so he’d immediately walk up to you once he recognises you and start talking. Like Price, he’d be pleasantly surprised to just see you in such a mundane place, but won’t question it. Or complain about it either. In fact, if you’re not carrying anything heavy, he’d be the one to suggest going out to eat or drink something. Again, either a small and quiet cafe or a small restaurant. Maybe you’d go to a place you liked when you were kids, if it’s still open. Regardless, it’d be hard to get him to shut up with how excited he is to have you around. It’s a calm kind of excitement, but he’s happy, and that’s what’s important. It’s very likely that he’ll pay for your food, even if you insist he shouldn’t, but it’s not like he has any other use for his money. Chatting with him about the good old times is very sweet, he likes to bring up all the good things. But eventually, he’ll thank you for everything you’ve done for him and how happy he was to have you as a friend. Considering there were very few people who tried to get to know him, he was quite lonely, but you fixed that. You made everything better. From the pain on his knee when he fell as you gave him a band-aid, to the pain in his heart when the other children ridiculed him. Like Price, he’ll ask you if you want his number so you could continue to keep in contact with each other. He knows it’ll likely never be the same again, but he can pretend everything is as good as it used to be back when he was young. He’d love to spend time with you again.

Ghost: This man has had one of the worst childhoods imaginable. He was abused by his father, and the only friends he had aside from you were his mother and his brother. Barely anyone was kind towards him or accepted him considering he had always been the weird kid. No one but you wanted to spend time with him. Needless to say, Ghost had taken a liking to you when he was younger. You spent your time with him, you even defended him when some of the other kids ridiculed him. And now, 12 years later, he finds you running after a coin you accidentally dropped on the ground, bumping into him as you did so. He’d be wide eyed at first, a bit quiet as well. Once you left he never would have thought he’d ever find someone like you again, but here you were, just as quiet and surprised to see him. Ghost would pick up the coin for you and ask you how you’ve been. It had been a while. Although he’s not usually one to smile, especially not in public, you could see him faintly do so. He’s become a quiet man, so he won’t be talking too much about everything, especially not everything that happened after he joined the military, but he’s more than willing to talk to you about other matters. His life has become better over the past few years, but that doesn’t mean he isn't scarred still. He’ll offer you a walk to just about anywhere, really, even if the final destination will always end up being one of the places you used to hang out in as children. An abandoned house, a park, a mall. Manchester is a fairly large city, so there’s much to see. It would be a bit rough to catch up with him entirely, but he loves to hear about everything you’ve accomplished. You’ve become such a mature person, it warms his heart to see how far you’ve come in life. Back then, when everything was so bleak, when neither of you thought you’d see your 28th birthdays, everything was different. But now, you’re smiling at him as you’re drinking your milkshake. You seem to be better off, and so is he. It makes him nostalgic to see all of this, but he’s happy. Ghost will offer you to come to his home if you want. Even now, he still loves you dearly as a friend and couldn’t be happier about the fact he’s found you again by chance.

Laswell: When she was young she was a healthy mix of rowdy and good. While she never caused much trouble, she did stand up for herself when she needed to. However, this alone was enough to get the attention of some awful people. People either liked her or hated her, there usually was no inbetween for them. Some people did try to bully her, but it never ended well since she would fight for herself, plus she had some good friends who would do the same for her. However, none of them could compare to you, as you were her best friend. All her joys she would celebrate with you, and all of her sadness she would share with you. Back then, things were simpler, something small meant the end of the world, but you always had each other’s backs. Laswell tries to not think about you too much since you slowly drifting apart is quite painful to her. As she grew older, she learned to live with the pain and it didn’t bother her as much. Still, she was very happy when you were sending her a message after all this time. She may have been at work, but responded to you immediately, having missed you just as much as you missed her. Once you meet up it’s evident you’ve both grown a lot older. Laswell has been working for the CIA since her twenties, so it’s been almost thirty years. You have a lot to catch up on, but you take your time, eating at a fancy restaurant and spending hours there, laughing at everything that’s happened. Laswell would show you photos of all the places she’s visited during her downtime. She’s seen almost the entire world, some of it with her wife, some of it without her. Although she doesn’t usually tell people she’s married, to another woman too, she knows you’re a safe person, you’ve always accepted her as she was. Considering how happy you looked when you saw her wife, she continued to tell you about the world. But you get your chance to tell her about everything that’s happened to you as well. If the conversation goes especially well, Laswell might invite you to a few outings every once in a while, after you’ve met up a few more times. Plus you get to meet her wife eventually as well, which is a real privilege. Considering how much she loves her and wants to protect her, not many know about her. It’ll be fun either way since you get to make more memories together again.

#cod #cod x reader #john price #john price x reader #price x reader #kyle gaz garrick #kyle gaz garrick x reader #gaz x reader #simon ghost riley #simon ghost riley x reader #ghost x reader #kate laswell #kate laswell x reader #seeing that someone read my rambles actually really cheered me up yesterdy so thank you for that!#this request was really sweet. I have a friend who I miss so dearly even now #I still dream of her from time to time. she was my best friend but I never was hers #Sometimes I wish I had the guts to text her but I'm awkward and can't hold a conversation to save my life so I'll have to live like that #oh well! it happens unfortunately! wish it didn't though!#anyway as much as I love to romance the lads and the lasses there's something so wholesome about friendship too!#especially a really good one where you can goof around and have fun and give each other sweet gifts!#Love friendship! friendships are fun! I'm glad I get to write platonic stuff every once in a while as well!#I'm not a romantic person at all irl but I can appreciate a good friendship!#thank you for this request it was very cool and epic!

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corrodedcoughin · 11 months

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eddie munson the kind of guy to stand over some food with his t-rex arms and fingers wiggling like ‘don’t mind if I do’ before grabbing something that’s too hot and burning his mouth and trying to breathe through it and yelling like ‘HASHAHSHS’

steve harrington the kind of guy to walk in five minutes later after hearing him yelling and do the exact same thing

#just let them ‘HASHSHSHASHS’ together #Robin watching them from her corner as they yell and ‘hasahshahs’ at the same time #steddie being funny and having fun and loving each other and just being loser4loser ?#my life blood #stranger things #eddie munson #steddie #steve harrington

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carlyraejepsans · 2 years

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