Toxic Love | Erik Killmonger
Chapter 4: ~Little Minx~
For Chapter 3: ~Never Listen To Demons~ click here.
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"Only if you~ fuck~ make me remember the next time we fuck."
"Promised." He hummed in her ear and she finally let go, cumming all over his fingers as she turned weak in his arms.
~~~
Her eyes closed lazily after her orgasm finally calmed down and the demon forced his fingers deep into her mouth, forcing her to suck them clean while he very carefully laid her down on the cold bathroom tiles. "Go to sleep, ma. You need it." He whispered into her ear and she slowly drifted off to sleep the way she had done the night before.
He didn't want her to die so soon.
When the woman woke up again, she didn't see the man anywhere anymore, nor did she hear one of her maids call her for breakfast while she tried to get up from the stone cold floor. Her head was throbbing and her ears were pounding while she pushed herself to her feet. She felt like she had a terrible hangover.
"Ms Delcour!" A woman called out again and made herself ready to get inside to see if she was okay, but Delaney was quick enough and right on time to keep her outside of her bedroom.
"I heard you! I'm sorry I didn't react sooner, but I'll be there in 15 minutes!" She yelled back and ran her hand down her face, relieved she reacted just in time. How long had she been dreaming?
'Dreaming.... no, it wasn't a dream', she reminded herself as she looked at the bruises, 'It was real. He was real'.
She watched herself closely in the huge mirror in front of her. Oh how disgusted she felt with herself. Disobeying her father and making deals with a man, a thing she didn't even know existed and all that in one day.... what happened to her? Did she finally want to break free from her controlling and overprotective father? Was this the moment she finally realised she was an adult and had her own fucking life that only she could control?
She had no idea.
Never had she felt this lost and confused, this far away from herself.
Don't worry about it ma~ you're still the same little minx, just gotta figure out how to finally live a little and I'm gonna help with that so stop stressing. Your little heart can't take it right now. You're too weak.
"But I did some bad shit and my father is pissed as hell.... I can't face him a second time without having my thoughts in order." She whispered, hoping he somehow could hear her while she was fixing her curls and he clearly could.
He was reading her mind, her body, her soul.
She was his.
So? You're an adult girl, show him ya got your own plans. You're not a fancy prisoner anymore.
"Why are you helping me?" She put on some lazy lingerie and some simple sweats and a crop top before she walked out like she was told.
You deserve a life too.
All she did was hum to his words, but inside she melted. No one ever talked to her like that.... like she was a person instead of a valuable object that had to be protected at all times. The man made her feel alive even though that was perhaps his little game to get her wrapped around his fingers and addicted to him, but she couldn't care less. She couldn't care less he was perhaps killing her, that he just wanted sex and her soul, she felt hopeful for an own life for once.
"Get your food and disappear upstairs again." Her father hissed as he was reading the newspapers and she watched him with a respectful yet sassy expression, showing him she wasn't backing off.
"No, I'm not a little girl anymore." She grabbed her plate and sat down. "And we need to talk, dad."
"I don't want to talk right now." He licked his index finger and thumb and turned the page.
"Because I'm being disobedient for once? Because I figured out I'm an adult and my own person?" She scoffed and began eating her bacon.
There you go, princess.
"Because you didn't listen to me yesterday." He finally looked up and to her surprise seemed more calm than earlier that morning. "Delaney, I already lost your mother because of her recklessness and stubbornness, I can't lose you either."
He won't, ma. You got me who'll take care of you and if you die~ it's because of me, no one else.
"You won't." She repeated, ignoring the rest the man was saying to her. "I'm careful and I am staying out of your business for a reason. Everyone knows I don't know shit about the family business so they'll leave me alone."
"What if they decide they want to change the rules? Involve our kids? You won't be safe then." He laid down his newspaper and got up to sit next to her at the bar.
"You're overthinking things. I'm an adult, I know how to defend myself and I know how to shoot when needed, you know that." She mumbled while covering her mouth that was full of food.
"I know...."
"Give me some freedom, dad. I promise I'll still stick to some rules, but I want to go out without bodyguards sometimes too, make some friends."
"I.... okay.... perhaps you're right, but you still have to stay in the regions I approve of on our local map, alright?" Her father grabbed his phone and showed her the local map that was split into different territories that belonged to different families.
"Good enough, I can stick to that rule." She smiled a little and grabbed a bottle of water.
"Don't come close to the Murphy's territory and neither the Siegel's."
"Yes dad, I know who I need to avoid." She nodded and continued eating her breakfast after she sat down again.
"Good." He got up and grabbed his suitcase. "Oh, and please come home before 2 AM, we're getting new guards tonight and they don't recognize you yet."
"Okay cool." She nodded and waved at her father that left the kitchen with his suitcase.
Messages:
Reyna- Wanna go shopping today? Or are your father and your bodyguards too mad to let you go?
Delaney watched her phone light up and she grabbed it from the marble counter, checking what it said before sending something back quickly.
Delaney- Nah girl, I can go~ without my bodyguards.
Reyna- What?!
Delaney- You heard me. Time Square, 2 PM?
Reyna- Hell yeah! See ya girl.
"You better go look for some lingerie too~" The man casually appeared behind her again and reached around her body to grab a red apple.
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✨ Evans and his morning sweets nothings ✨
- RUBY’S DIARY-
Ruby’s note:
A couple weeks ago this situation came out of my mind while I was watching some Chris interviews and something else about him which a can’t remember the half of the things I saw,hear blah, blah. about him but suddenly my head was rolling with the idea and I couldn’t get over it for a couple weeks.
Warnings: +18, smut, age gap, unprotected sex, teasing, fingering, mention of oral (female receiving), dirty talk, dady kink, body fluids, cum kink , and maybe fluff?
-•-•-
Since the time we met ten months ago, both going back and forth taking the first flight we find and only to expend time with each other, being nothing more than exclusives cause we’re not exactly looking for a serious relationship due our busy and demanding jobs and of course don’t forget the 16 years age gap between us (not really bothering us since the first flirt ), but acting like a real couple and not really being a real one, the way we being working on our “relationship” has been way much better than we expected.
Here I am, Wednesday early morning and getting ready for going to work and the thing is that I promised Chris that I would be doing home office during his time visiting me in the city where I currently live due my job, but a last minute call changed our plans for the day and thanks god he understood the situation.
Just like everyday since he arrived we woke up to make our morning routine but this time earlier than usual, going first to the gym at the same time that i usually go , letting Chris surprised how i was able to be an early bird when he perfectly knew that i'm not morning a person. I mentioned the night before that he didn’t need to start his day the same time as me and if he wanted to stay in bed more time I totally ge it, but like always he was the one of us in waking up first even that early morning.
At 4:45 am we arrived to the gym, pretending we came alone minding our business doing our workout and acting like if we didn't know each other when someone got closer as part of our plan in case someone would recognised him even with his face mask on and a cap, because our way to “spend time in public” was Chris checking me out every time he could and me being a shameless teaser.
Once back at my place, he stepped in the shower first while i was getting all my things ready for the day, changing the dirty sheets from the night before, now as part of the morning routine every time Chris is here, not because i like putting new and fresh sheets every morning but the messy activities we make every night along with our tiredness lazy assess and sometimes our body asking for a little more attention during the middle our sleep or in the morning before starting our day, so yes! It was necessary to replace the new ones, but don’t get me wrong i’m not complaining at all, I mean this became a reminder of the fun stuff we do and learn about from the other.
Once done with the bedding changing i let the outfit that a picked the night before in my bed and just in time when I was done with everything needed, a fresh and clean Chris walked out my bathroom greeting me with a cheeky smirk on his face while i was trying not get distracted by him walking in my room with a towel wrapped around his hip, his glorious tattooed hard chest with a few water drops rolling through his toned muscles, feeling his hand touched softly one of my arms getting my attention , his body close to mine and with a low and deep voice saying -“your turn doll”- and with that i found myself already clenching my needy walls with nothing around but with the sound of his voice.
By the time i was almost done with the final touches of my makeup, Chris whose presence was absent in my room since i finished showering, walked back to my room with two mugs on each hand and right in the moment he stepped in i saw through my vanity mirror how he closed his eyes taking a deep breath from the mix of the aroma of his perfume with my mine, his chest slightly grown before opened his blue eyes and one more time just like in the gym checked me out, losing his gaze in some specifics curves of my body, with a smirk on his face he was getting closer to me
-”here’s your tea doll”- hand me one the mugs, and while I was taking it from his hand I thanked him after I winked. He just nodded without leaving the smile on his lips and I didn’t notice but his eyes getting a bit darken when he felt my fingers brushed accidentally his hand.I took a sipt from the tea that he made for me, Chris knows that I prefer taking tea every morning instead of the common cup of coffee, so every time we are around from the other, at my place or his, never letring me down without morning favorite tea, and that kind of details was one of reasons i can’t help myself but just melting and get even more attached to him.
Instated of leaving my room he prefer to stayed right next to me, drinking his coffee quietly, facing me and leaning in the vanity table, feeling his eyes glutted on me, following every of my moves and after a couple minutes of comfortable silence he finally says- “you look beautiful today doll, you always do”- he said running his gaze over my outfit taking mental pictures of how good looks his favorite curves covered on my cream cropped cable knit sweater and the green pencil under knee skirt, my high heels allowing me almost been at the the same height than him, i smiled wide never leaving my eyes off from my reflect in the mirror fixing my low ponytail i said
-"thank you baby, you don't look bad yourself too"- and while i took my earrings to putting on, this time i turn my eyes to Chris and this time me doing the same thing he did with me before, I also took mental pictures of how hot this (my) man looks on formal clothes , with an air of Andy Barber in his outfit choice for the interview recording he was going to have later that morning.- “you really know how to wear this kind of outfits, i like what you did with the sleeves, told you it’d look great and way more relax but not too much for today’s interview, they gonna love it”- playing all the time with his shirt buttons, but he only let out a groan from his chest and closing the small gap between us that he left after brought me the tea, with one hand taking me by the small of my back pulling closer-
- doll, please… stop- he said, sounded desperate and squeezed my hip.
-what? what am I doing this time? literally nothing guapo!- I giggle for the tone he complained, trying to find his baby blue eyes with mine while I rest one of my hands resting on his chest . A deeper groan came out this time, and now both hands were placed almost under my cropped sweater, touching the edge of my skirt and little bit of my warm skin , he playfully squeezed my waist a little bit harder than before.
-Don’t play now like the innocent one here young lady. You know exactly what i’m talking about - he said finally looking in my eyes and this time i’m trying to read his gaze-
-“the second you woke up you’ve been non stop teasing me , you wore the pink tights that i love how your bum looks and you wore it on your leg day! Well played by the way , then after i showered you were looking at me with pleading eyes and just before you stepped into the shower you and your smart ass came out only wearing a pretty thong and your sweatie white top with nothing unederneath and you fucking adorable nipples casually greeting me , i bet you weren’t looking for anything isn’t? .- taking a deep breath before continuing his official greedy frustrated statement, feeling his hands pushing me even more to his body like if he was trying to make me feel him-.
-you always look amazing- he continued a little bit more relaxed but with darkened eyes- “but today… damn baby girl! you're stunning and this outfit is doing something more. And I see no panties lines or what are you wearing, missy ? oh oh plus! your sweet fragrance is driving me crazy , and all of that right in the day you need to attend an urge in your office and just leaving me here without our morning sweets nothings , waiting here long hours without even trying before at least a bit of you doll”- his hands now in my ass, squishing them harder.
I just stayed there with my heart racing , blood running faster through my entire body, feeling new beats in some places that I didn't know existed. Bitten my lip and a grin on my face, my hand placed on his chest slowly goes to his muscular shoulders and the free hand gives slight caresses to his beard, loving the feeling in my hand- “really?, I’m sorry babe, I was just doing my daily routine, I didn’t mean to get you in this state, but i’ll make it up for you once I come back from work, ok? ”- I said softly, calm and with my best innoce tone, my hand caressing his beard , brushing my fingertips every now and then through his lips while I slowly adjusted my hips feeling a pretty hard situation screaming for attention. I let out audible gasp and eyes and ears never losing a detail, pressing harder on our hips together , and shamefulness grinding his hardness covered in my needy core.
-”mmmmmhh of course you’ll have to make it up to me after work... “- i whimper when i feel he stopped moving his hips and his hands holding tight my hips to keep me steady, he chuckle at the when i was trying to get some friction- “...cause right now we have much time to worship you the way i want it doll- my skirt rolled up around my waist, his fingertips touching my burning skin,me breathing heavily waiting for more. His eyes widened and chuckled when he felt my undergarth - “oh oh oh! this is what you call panties doll?” - he said, grabbing the strips resting on my hips - “ well is a thong thou, and i don’t need an awful pantie line showing off”- i said with obvious tone - “oh sorry, a tiny thong that i can’t remember you wearing it or at least showing me before… ”- feeling his playful finger roaming my bum and hips, he leaned into my ear and feeling his hot breath in there- “also you’re lucky this is such a small peach doll and perfectly fits on this pathetic tiny piece of fabric that you were hiding away from me”- a sweet released moan came out of my mouth at the moment he cupped my cunt into his warm hand, rubbing his palm and squeezing tight.
sliding the thong to side his middle finger, he ran his finger between my lips without going further than that, my pussy began to feel slippery with the juices that could no longer resist being inside for any longer.- mmmmhh baby girl, all this for me huh?, you might be the brightest ruby, but I did not know that a gemstone could be juicy, oh it is true, I forgot that only I have the honor of making this gem in a sweet and soft little peach, so juicy and exquisite-
a small scream from my mouth came out in protest of more, his forehead was against mine - please! - I begged between gasps- “please what? Do you want me to put my fingers in and touch you? that you want? - He growled excited to see that he only nodded, giving me a short kiss full of lust - "mmm if you want, I can do that- sliding two fingers inside, he began to touching me desperately, pressing lightly on my little button making circles sore He, placing my weak legs with his caresses- "Damn, you're fucking wet ... I wish I could eat you whole, but we don't have time for that, you know I like to take my time when I taste you- without warning I take out his two shiny fingers for my sweets juices, without taking his eyes off me, he introduced his two fingers covered with my flavor to his mouth, sucking rigorously, he let out a loud moan, a loud pop when he finished tasting the nectar of a gem, a quick and agile movement, he changed places, He is facing the mirror and Chris was behind me, he pressed his hardness against my butt, I let out a moan of despair, I need him inside me stretching my warm walls.
Without removing his gaze from mine reflected in the mirror, and with his eyes full of lust, the sound of his belt rumbled in my ears and my centers got even more wet, under his closure, I bend over leaving my butt exposed for him, he grunted as he stroked my butt and squeezed it, I moaned when he spanked me a couple of times with his big hands- “I'm going to take what's mine and I want to hear those beautiful sounds you make when I'm deep inside you, did you hear me baby do? - I nodded. He felt his big and hard cock hitting when I took it out of his boxers, I felt desperate, everything was spinning and my pussy was a mess and it didn't even enter me.
I moaned loudly - "Yes baby, you feel incredibly tight, I love your little pussy, so perfect and good for me" - Chris entered me without warning, let out a pornographic moan, his cock was deep in me, he stayed still for a couple second, and then start moving uncontrollably, making us moan and beg for more.
-”oh daddy!, please make me cum, your cock feel so good”-i cried and moved my hips looking for more, Chris slapped my bum-” my baby girl so desperate for his daddy cock, so pretty and good for daddy… come on doll squeeze my cock with my sweet little pussy- his dominance turned me on even more and doing what he said- “aaaagggh, ye..yess doll, keep going, i’m gonna make us cum so hard, make a mess on daddy’s cock, give to me be a good girl a give me that slutty cum- Chris grabs my hips harder and pounded so hard and good that i was losing my battle and the dirty talk almost making come to the sweet release, i loud moan came out of me and, making a whole mess on Chris dick.
-”shit baby girl, that was so hot, i’m so close and this time you are going to carry me on that piece of fabric the entire day ok?- i without a warming i felt his cock twitching and milking him so hard, he groaned loudly and emptied himself inside me.
As a gentleman that he is, he helped me fix my clothes, my hair, makeup, but less to clean up his mess, he made me go to the office like that, I thought he would help me clean up, but no, besides being slightly late to the office He made sure I carried it in my panties .. I was so lost after that little show he wanted, Chris ended up taking me to the office, and the rest is another story.
---
Ruby’s note
sorry gems! but i need a moment, i know i could end better than that but uuuummmm i just couldn’t.
i feel fucking tingles.
Let me know what you think and show me your love.
say yes to reblog
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So I just saw that post on laziness that you reblogged and I was wondering what your thoughts are on laziness vs procrastination? Because I'm going through a particularly bad round of procrastination, but I don't feel like it's borne out of laziness (which to me, is more of "I don't feel like doing this immediately but I will do it soon"). Whereas procrastination is constantly postponing something but never being able to convince my brain to actually do the task (also any tips on tackling this?)
Hello anon!! Yes hello good hi. first of all, ugh, I’m so sorry you’ve been having a hard time with procrastination lately. it’s rough and I hope it eases up for you.
hmmmm yes, so, laziness and procrastination. WELL. hmm. OKAY. these thoughts might be a bit all over the place, so I hope you’ll bear with me as I ramble on a bit. or a lot. probably a lot! I have a lot of thoughts about it all.
so I think I’d start off by saying that I kind of don’t believe in laziness.
it’s like... for me, laziness is... chronically choosing not to do something that you know you should do, even though that thing is entirely doable for you. that is to say, you have the time for a task, the skills for it, and the ability to motivate yourself to do it - but you regularly choose not to do it.
the key element here is choice. for me, laziness implies not just that a task isn’t done - it implies you could’ve done it, and then you chose not to. but to be able to choose not to do something, that thing has to be completely possible in the first place, right? we wouldn’t say we choose not to fly, we say that we can’t do it, it’s not possible for us. every day that I walk around instead of flying, I’m not being lazy, I’m just not doing something that’s outside my capability. very often (I’d argue always) when we regularly don’t do something, it’s because we cannot do it. it’s not a choice not to do it, because there’s something going on that makes the task impossible in our status quo. I think our ideas about what we can and can’t do, and how serious a barrier it is to not be able to motivate ourselves, are often really skewed by comparison with others. if I lived in a world populated only by birds, maybe I’d think I was procrastinating on flying.
the thing that briefly breaks me out of a procrastination loop is usually panic at the promise of Bad Consequences, i.e. my brain is finally convinced of the importance of the task, but this is a quick one-off fix that doesn’t help the chronic issue, so next time I have to do the same task I’ll follow the same pattern of putting it off until Total Panic Time. and at a certain point, even the Bad Consequences just aren’t enough motivation, and I simply can’t do the task. often I am in distress at not being able to do the task. just as often, the distress is a contributing factor in the task not getting done for longer.
the issue that makes the task not doable for me tends to vary a lot depending on the situation. and I think a lot of people have it the same way, where different issues crop up with different tasks.
- so like sometimes it’s a Success Elsewhere issue. you just can’t believe you can actually decently do the thing you have to do, so you go work at something else that you think you can succeed at. “lazy” to me implies a lack of effort, right? and yet with this one, the things that you do instead of homework or chores or whatever, they often take plenty of effort. like you’re kicking ass at video games, pouring hours into it, because the game makes you feel like you really could be the best!! it’s worth the effort because you get rewards! you’re working, just not at the thing you Should be doing, because you can’t believe working on that thing will lead to any reward/success.
- sometimes it’s a Why Does It Matter issue. sometimes you just aren’t convinced enough that the reward of doing a task is worth the work it���ll take, because you can clearly see that the world is in crisis and it’s exceptionally hard to believe that, say, homework matters when everything feels like it’s on fire.
- sometimes it’s a Fuck You Anyway issue. a lot of people feel alienated by the society we live in, the same society that says hey, you have to do homework, you have to succeed at university, you have to get these grades, you have to be polite, you can’t get angry, you have to respond to emails, you have to do this specific kind of job to make good money or else you won’t have enough. when an authority you don’t trust/a system that is clearly broken tries to shove you into doing something, sometimes you don’t want to bloody do it, you know? sometimes you don’t want to do the small tasks that build up into following a path you don’t believe in.
- sometimes it’s a The World Has Swept Me This Far, What, Are You Saying I Have to Do Things for Myself Now issue. between parents and teachers and societal expectations, a person can go surprisingly far in this world just kind of keeping to the course that other people decide for them. but the map always has edges, right? eventually people stop having a plan for you and you’re quite suddenly expected to know exactly what to do with yourself, and just become a success with the opportunities you’ve been given, but you have no clue whatsoever how to do that. doing nothing in this instance isn’t laziness, it’s not that you want to sit and stagnate - it’s just that you’re doing exactly what you’ve always done: what you’re being guided to do. the only difference is that now you’re not being guided to do anything, so you don’t do anything. you have no idea how to flex the muscles of personal choice; you don’t even know if you have them.
- sometimes it’s a Distraction issue. again, for a huge amount of people, the world is pretty garbage right now. and sometimes you’re clinging on via the happy hormone hit you get when you do something fun, so doing something hard/boring feels like it would push you too far. or sometimes the hard/boring task doesn’t absorb enough of your attention, leaving way too much space for your brain to talk to itself and spiral out of control with bad thoughts and feelings, which it won’t do if you’re watching videos or scrolling on your phone or hanging out with friends etc. given how tailored our brain hormones naturally are to finding the shortest path to happiness, and how relatively easy it is in our culture to find short-term happiness via the internet, I don’t find it surprising that a lot of people just literally cannot engage with doing difficult, boring tasks when there’s a small burst of happiness just one tap away.
- sometimes it’s an Energy issue. bad mental health is a motivation killer. battling depression or anxiety or another mental health issue just leeches away your reserves for other things. you don’t have the spoons for doing a task, but people with more spoons will look at you not doing it and call you lazy - because for them, the task is doable, and they don’t get that for you it is not.
UGH MAN there’s so much more to it than just these separate scenarios, they all interweave and there are loads more of them, and I want to talk about how being neurodivergent affects these things and how being queer affects it too imo, but I feel like I could go on and on forever so I’ll leave it at that. my point is, I think both procrastination and so-called laziness start when for some reason, a task isn’t doable for you. so the key is figuring out why the task isn’t doable, and changing something, and then hopefully being able to chug away at it!
some things that have helped me are:
- getting little bits of help - when my mum and I hang out, she’ll sometimes just sit and chat to me while I clean around her because it’s doable for me while she’s there. collaboration can ease a lot of procrastination woes for me.
- instead of telling myself “I have to do this”, I tell myself “I deserve to have this done”. so like, instead of “I have to clean the bathroom”, it’s “I deserve to live in a clean house”. instead of “I have to do this essay for homework”, it should have been “I deserve to be able to show the skills I have, and get help from my teachers in the places where I have holes in my understanding”. it’s just like, less focus on the dumb task and more focus on the goal that I’ll achieve by doing the task, with a healthy dose of self-validation on the side.
- if the problem’s really chronic and affecting your life in a pretty major way, maybe it’s time to look into whether there’s an underlying issue with the way your brain focuses? I’m autistic, and I have friends with ADHD, and the way our brains focus/don’t focus on things can be hard to manage at times - but understanding what’s going on inside the old brainspace and reading about how other people handle the same things can be a really good way to start breaking the cycle of procrastination.
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