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#not to complain on my hockey blog
sturnioz · 1 month
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‘THIS IS (NOT) EASY’ — MATTHEW STURNIOLO
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pairing. matthew sturniolo x fem!reader genre. smut, fluff, angst
word count. 13.7k
❝being in this friends with benefits relationship with you was not as easy as i thought it would be...❞
content warnings. friends with benefits au, crack humour, explicit content, oral (f & m receiving), fingering, squirting, p in v, unprotected sex (creampies), big dick matt, doggy position, alcohol consumption and mentions of weed, flirty!chris,
—authors note. i've actually written this before but for a different person on another blog. so if you happen to stumble across that somehow and notice the similarities, its me lol. i just liked the plot so much and i wanted to use it for matt.
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“Wait, you what?!”
You gasp out loud, not caring about the loudness of your tone, voice piercing throughout the library alongside the squeaking legs of your chair across the wooden flooring as you abruptly straight up in your seat. 
Other students with their heads shoved in books and laptop screens peek over in curiosity while one irritated classmate leans over the table to shush you angrily, warning you about the volume of your voice but you pay them no mind, gaze fixed on Matt who sits across from you sheepishly.
Matthew Sturniolo—one of the heartthrobs on campus, the quiet and mysterious type that turns curious heads, and undoubtedly the kindest guy in class has been your best friend for the past few years. You met during a practice hockey game where fourteen-year-old Matt had tried to score a goal to impress his brothers and newfound friends, only for the hockey puck to come flying over the glass barrier, hurling straight towards your face and leaving you with a swollen eyeball and a busted up nose.
Matt was unbelievably apologetic, going to extreme lengths by buying candies and ripping up flowers from potted plants to give to you whenever you both crossed paths, begging for your forgiveness over and over again desperately until you socked him in the face, giving him a hefty nosebleed and a bruised cheek in return. 
A toothy grin spread across your cheeks and you finally had accepted the gifts out of his hands, a happy ‘now we’re even!’ leaving your lips as you had ripped open the candies, offering him a treat, offering him your friendship.
The two of you became inseparable and if someone saw one of you, they knew that the other would be trailing along behind them. You were two peas in a pod—the dynamic duo. You were so joined at the hip that when you both enrolled for college, you tried signing up for a dorm on campus, wanting and hoping to be roommates. 
It didn’t happen.
Matt ended up rooming with one of his friends, Tyler, while you got stuck with some girl you didn’t even know but had become acquainted with over a short period of time. 
Still, you and Matt never strayed far from each other even with your roommates in the picture. He sleeps over at your place every now and then, and vice versa. You’re certain that he’s even claimed a whole drawer in your dresser, filled with his spare shirts, sweatpants and underwear.
A lot of your mutual friends, including his brothers, found it suspicious how you two could be so close without anything going on between you both, complaining how the two of you can’t be just friends. It was partially the truth.
You are not just friends, you’re best friends.
“I’m just saying, that you’re complaining about not hooking up with someone for a few days while I haven’t slept with someone for, like, a month,” Matt repeats to you with flushed cheeks, adjusting the black cap on his head with one hand while the other skilfully twirls a pen around his fingers, “Times are hard, kid. I got assignments up to my ass—”
“There’s no way you haven’t hooked up with someone lately,” You hiss through gritted teeth, refusing to believe a word that comes out of his mouth when he’s talking about such nonsense. 
A nearby student from the table next to yours shifts around in their seat in annoyance to look at you, pressing their finger aggressively against their lips to tell you to quiet down and you scoff in response, throwing them the middle finger with your own irritancy and annoyance.
“Can you not?” Matt scolds as his hand firmly wraps around your own, squeezing in warning as he guides it back down to the table. He offers an apologetic smile to the student, and as always, it works like a charm as they shyly smile back and resume their work. Another scoff leaves your lips and Matt turns his attention back to you. “I’m telling you the truth, you know.”
“Bullshit,” You murmur, sending him a glare. “That girl from my study group was over at your dorm last weekend—I saw her Snapchat stories.”
“Dude, we’re both in the same study group. She came over for some of my notes and ended up staying longer because Tyler offered her an ounce of his ‘premium weed’,” Matt explains, adding a sarcastic emphasis around the word ‘premium weed’ which has you snorting, knowing that there was nothing premium about Tyler’s stash. “She eventually ended up staying over and hooking up with Chris anyways.”
Your face contorts into a look of confusion at that, “What? Chris? He isn’t even your roommate.”
“I know. Tyler’s sheets are still in the dryer,” Matt grimaces. “But Nick has had this ‘sex-free’ policy on his and Chris’ dorm ever since that guy screwed him over last weekend.” 
“Oh…” You pause, amused at Nick’s new policy, but then the realisation finally hits you. “So that’s why Tyler didn’t have any sheets on his bed when I came over on Monday.”
“Y—wait, you came over Monday?” Matt snaps his head towards you, eyes narrowing as he jabs his pen in your direction. “Did you fuck in my bed?!”
“No. Of course not,” You gasp, deeply offended by his accusation and Matt lets out a sigh of relief, relaxing his shoulders as he leans back into his chair. “We actually fucked on the couch—”
“Are you fucking kidding me—”
“That’s besides the point!” You cut him off before he can grill you, silencing him by raising your hand in front of his face when he tries to retaliate again. “The fact remains, Matt, is that you haven’t fucked anyone in a whole month. And that’s like… I don’t know, it’s like blasphemy!”
Matt deadpans, his expression devoid of amusement. “I’m pretty sure that’s not blasphemy.”
“Whatever. You know what I mean,” You dismiss, shoving your books and pens as far away from you as you possibly could, no longer interested in studying the endless amount of words on that page now that you’ve discovered your best friend hasn't hooked up with anyone in so long. You sit comfortably in your chair as you fully give him your attention, tucking your legs beneath you. “I can’t believe it…”
“You’re telling me,” Matt huffs, deciding to set aside his own studies too. He rubs his face in frustration, groaning beneath his palms. You console him with a frown, reaching out to rub his shoulder in sympathy. Matt’s hands drop to his lap, and he shoots you a glare, “I can’t believe you didn’t believe me. Why would I lie about something like that?!”
You’re quick to defend yourself, “You fuck more than I do. Of course I'm not gonna believe a word you say when you tell me something like that!” 
And it’s true, Matt does have a higher number of sexual encounters compared to you. His boyish charm and adorable face doesn’t hide the fact that his body count is probably in the twenties, and that his online bank statements are likely to reveal the frequent purchases of packs of condoms (and maybe a few Plan B pills for extra precaution). Matt has always been cautious and responsible, which doesn’t surprise you. He’s not one to take unnecessary risks or potentially impregnate someone, especially a stranger.
“You didn’t have to say it out loud like that…” Matt mutters under his breath, cheeks dusting a slight shade of pink as another student turns around in their seat to glare at the pair of you, but her eyes widen comically as she sees Matt. Shyly, she tucks her hair behind her ears with a kind smile that Matt reciprocates. You lean back in your seat with a roll of your eyes just as Matt brings his attention back to you, “Are we done with this conversation? I’d rather talk about something more interesting than my nonexistent sex life.”
“Fine,” You relent. “Are you going to Nate’s later?”
“No, kid’s got some important hockey meeting or something, so we’re hanging another time,” Matt sighs softly, removing his cap to run his fingers through his hair before readjusting it. “Would you be cool if I came over yours?”
“Sure,” You grin, already shoving your belongings into your bag, eager to leave the library as soon as possible. Matt’s lip curls up in amusement as he follows in suit, packing his own things into his backpack and slinging it over his shoulder. 
As you glance over, you notice the girl still staring at Matt and a mischievous smirk forms on your face as you slam your hand on the desk in front of her, capturing her attention.
You jab your thumb in Matt’s direction and you teasingly offer, “If you want his number. I can give it to you. He’s been stuck in a dry spell recently, so—”
Before you can finish your sentence, Matt’s fingers curl around your elbow, yanking you away from the bewildered girl with a huff, “Move.”
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“I’ve been thinking about something…” You break the comfortable silence between you both after a few hours of binge-watching a series and indulging in takeout, dropping your pizza crust into the cardboard box and pushing it aside. Matt sits beside you on the couch, his own pizza in hand, gaze fixed on the TV screen, listening to what the characters are saying.
Matt glances at you with a quick, pointed look as he chews, “That doesn’t sound good.”
“Wow. Funny.” You deadpan with a roll of your eyes and he chuckles under his breath, turning his attention back to the TV screen. “Anyway, and hear me out before you say some dumb shit. I’ve been thinking about something that relates to that little problem we both have, and I may have come up with a way to fix it.”
“Why are you still hung up on this?” Matt complains between mouthfuls. “I don’t want to be constantly reminded that I’m not having sex—”
You quickly raise your hand to hush him and he goes cross eyed to stare at your palm in confusion. “I said hear me out.”
“Fine.”
“Great!“ You exclaim with a grin, “Okay, so, you and I are the best of friends, right? We always help each other out and—”
“Where is this going?”
“Hear. Me. Out.” You warn once more, emphasising each word. Matt sighs, nodding his head for you to continue. “We always help each other out, correct? And there’s no awkwardness between us, which is what also makes us so close. Remember that time we had to make out in front of Jeremy so he would stop hitting on me? And that time I pretended to be your girlfriend so Gracie would get the hint that you didn’t want to sleep with her anymore?”
“Well, yeah, but that didn’t exactly work out because we ended up hooking up with them a few days after it happened—”
“That’s not the point,” You say as you frustratingly rub at your temples. “The point is that we always help each other, no matter what the situation is, because we’re best friends. So, as best friends, I think we should help each other out with our little situation.”
“And how can we help each other out?”
“By fucking each other.”
The second those words leave your mouth, Matt chokes on his food, banging his fist against his chest as he coughs, his eyes watering and face turning red. The sight of his reaction has you cackling, wishing you had your phone nearby to take a picture.
After a few moments, Matt manages to regain his breath, reaching down to grab his bottle of water from the side of the couch and gulping it down almost immediately.
You click your tongue against your teeth, a playful smirk on your face. “That was a little dramatic.”
“And you’re crazy,” Matt shoots back, water droplets trickling down his chin as he looks at you with wide eyes. “Do you realise what you just said?”
You nod your head, “Perfectly.”
“We are not fucking. It’ll be weird,” Matt says, you instantly find offence to that, your jaw dropping in disbelief. Matt rolls his eyes at your reaction. “We’re best friends. Best friends don’t do that type of shit—Stop looking at me like that!”
You huff, turning your head away from him childishly. “I’m just trying to help us out. I don’t think it’ll be weird… people have done weirder.”
“Are you aware of how many friendships have been ruined because they fucked?” Matt questions you and you take a moment to ponder, wincing as you can easily name a few from the top of your head. “Exactly. As much as I find you attractive, I’m not going to ruin our friendship. We’ve been best friends for too long.”
Your head slowly turns back to Matt, who’s already looking at you. A grin spreads across your face as you flirtatiously bat your eyelashes at him, “You think I’m attractive?”
“My god, you’ve un-fucking-believable, I swear…” Matt trails off, muttering under his breath as he rubs at his forehead in frustration. You beam at the thought of getting under his skin, but eventually you roll your eyes and reach over to press your foot into his side, playfully nudging him to bring his attention back to you. 
Matt looks over at you with a deadpan expression and you continue to grin at him, tilting your head to the side as you admire the view.
Truthfully, you’ve always found Matt attractive even if it was in a friendly way and you’d be lying if you said that hooking up with him has never crossed your mind, but that’s mainly because you’re nosy and want to see what all the fuss is about when you constantly hear the girls fawn about what he’s like in bed.
Some say he’s extremely giving, tending to their needs in all ways possible. Some also say he’s demanding and rough, one hand curled into their hair as he’s fucking them from behind, spitting out degrading words into their ears. But you’ve also heard that he sometimes comes across as needy and desperate, begging for his cock to be sucked and to be made a mess out of.
It piques your interest a lot… maybe it’s wrong of you to think that way about someone you know so well, but you’re human after all, sometimes you can’t help the way you think about certain people.
“Look,” You speak up first, letting out a sigh. “What I said was just a suggestion, okay? If you don’t want to do it, then that’s fine—”
“How do you know that it won’t ruin our friendship?” Matt cuts you off and your eyebrows raise in surprise at the question. “We’ve been best friends for, like, six years or something right? I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to throw that all away because we messed up and decided to fuck each other just because we’re ‘sex deprived’.”
“We’re not going to get into anything super serious,” You reassure him, crossing your arms over your chest. “Sure, we’re probably going to end up in some type of friends with benefits situation, but we’re not going to include any of that official or exclusive title bullshit. We just hook up for a release when we can’t find it anywhere else, it’s as simple as that. No complications.”
“So…” Matt purses his lips in deep thought. “We can still fuck other people?”
You scoff, “Of course. You think I’d drop Tyler for you that easily?”
“Fuck you.”
Your lips curl into a smirk, “I’m hoping you would.”
Matt stares at you for a brief moment before chuckling, shaking his head as his tongue prods at his cheek. The little action spurs something within you but you remain seated, wanting Matt to be the one to make the first move if he was game in fucking you to help relieve the stress you’re both feeling… maybe Matt a little more considering that you fucked Tyler a few days prior, but you were desperate to be filled again. 
You watch Matt sit in silence for a moment, seemingly deep in his thoughts as his eyebrows knit together, thinking about the pros and cons. His hands come up to pull the cap off of his head completely, his hair messily falling in front of his eyes and your thighs press together as the thought of seeing it between your legs with your fingers threading through the locks. 
You internally laugh at how deluded you sound.
“What time does your roommate get back tonight?” Matt questions you, his low tone bringing you out of your own thoughts and your body buzzes with excitement, fumbling as you reach over to snag your phone off the coffee table to check the time, informing him that she won’t be home for another three hours. “Alright. Good to know.”
“So?” You press, dropping your phone back down as you look at him expectedly. “What’s it going to be?”
Matt takes a deep breath, “No titles.”
“None at all.”
“We can still fuck whoever we want.”
“Whoever, whenever.”
“And most importantly…” Matt pauses with a deep sigh, leaning over the couch closer to you and he holds up his hand, his pinkie outstretched. “We’re still best friends.”
“It’ll be like nothing ever changed.” You promise softly with a smile, curling your pinky finger around his own, squeezing it tightly to keep your promise.
It’s silent between you both for a while, and you can clearly see the cogs turning inside Matt’s head as he thinks about his next move, yet you’re the one that decides to take that initiative.
You rip your hand away from his to throw your arms around his shoulders, fingers buried into his locks as you drag him towards you to eagerly plant your lips on his. You’re surprised at how fast Matt responds to the kiss as his hands come up to cup your cheeks, tilting his head to the side to kiss you deeper, slipping his tongue into your mouth.
The plenty drunken kisses you’ve shared with Matt to help each other out of sticky situations is nothing like the kiss you’re experiencing right now, and it catches you extremely off guard. You were expecting him to allow you to take control of what was happening and lead him through it considering you were the one to bring it up, but with the way Matt’s pushing you backwards to lay you down on the couch and crawling between your open legs with his lips still attached to yours, you’re stumped. 
“Wait,” You stop him, pressing your palm against his chest to push him back and Matt moves away with raw, wet lips, his fingers hovering above the waistband of your shorts. “Why are we doing this on the couch? I have a bed we can use.”
Matt glares down at you, “That didn’t stop you and Tyler from fucking on my couch.”
“Actually, there were no sheets on Tyler’s bed, so—”
“Think of this as payback,” Matt smiles at you sweetly and you snarl, knocking your leg against his side with force and he laughs through clenched teeth, “Besides, you’ve probably fucked a lot of people on this couch… Do you really care?”
You blink up at him. “Are you implying that I’m a slut?”
Matt shrugs, “Maybe, yeah.”
“That’s so hot of you.”
Matt chuckles and leans down to reconnect your lips, fingers unbuttoning your shorts and pulling them down your legs with your underwear, carelessly throwing them somewhere to the side and you hiss at the cold air that hits, yearning for warmth.
Matt’s lips trail down your throat and to the collar of your shirt, nipping and sucking at your skin, heading south to where your thighs shake in anticipation. Your bottom lip catches between your teeth as you watch him shuffling down to lay between your legs, hands pushing against your knees to spread you further apart, the coldness of his rings prickling at your skin.
Your own hand reaches down to thread your fingers through his hair, trying to tug him closer but he barely budges, gazing up at you with his brows knit together.
You whine, “Hurry.”
“Are you always this impatient?”
“Of course,” You look at him like he’s stupid. “We’re both doing this for a reason and it’s to cum, not to take our sweet little time and—Oh shit…”
“Fucking yapping. You talk too much.” Matt drags his tongue through your folds, the pink muscle swirling over your clit and your body jerks in shock at the sensation, a gasp fleeting past your lips as your grip on his hair tightens, feeling his tongue wiggle between your folds and licking upwards to flick over your clit before his fingers tease at your entrance.
Your body goes slack against the couch cushions, mouth stuck open as he eases two digits inside the warmth of your pussy, curling his fingers upwards as his lips wrap around your sensitive clit and you whine, tugging at his hair a little harder which causes him to groan, the vibrations causing goosebumps to shoot up your spine.
You’re in shock at how well Matt actually uses his tongue and fingers. Of course you’ve heard stories from your girl friends and even Matt himself, but you didn’t expect him to be this good and it completely catches you off track, unable to control the noises that rip from the back of your throat when he begins to pump his fingers in and out of your cunt while using his tongue to work wonders on your clit.
“Matt,” You whisper his name with a moan, thighs twitching and closing in around his head. You feel him smirk against your pussy and you squeeze your thighs in warning. “Stop it.”
“Don’t tell me you’re going to cum already?” He asks, his tone a little condescending as he raises his head, mouth glistening with your arousal. His fingers continue hitting that spot that has your toes curling and back arching against the cushions. “You can cum, if you want.”
“You’re so fucking cocky,” You tut, fighting the urge to smile but you amusement ends up slipping away and is overcome b y pleasure as he pumps his fingers a few more times, the tightening band in your stomach snapping as you cum all over his fingers, gasping through high pitched whines and trying to control the convulsing movement of your body.
“That’s it,” Matt hums, pressing a quick kiss to your pussy. “Good job.”
You choke out your words, unable to come up with a full sentence as your hand falls limp onto his shoulder, fingers twitching over the material as you breathe heavily. “What the fuck was that?!”
“Me eating you out,” He answers matter-of-factly, a hint of smugness in his tone as he pops his fingers into his mouth to lick them clean. Your mouth drops in shock at the action and he meets your gaze, “You good?”
“Yeah… good.” You nod dumbly, completely astonished at how nonchalant Matt is acting as you watch him tug his sweatpants and boxers down his legs awkwardly when he sits up, eyes automatically zoning in on his cock that slaps against his stomach once freed from its confinements. 
Honestly, you have seen Matt naked. He’s comfortable with stripping in front of you and changing without any thought. But… you’ve never seen Matt hard, and the sight alone is enough to have your mouth watering.
Your best friend is huge.
“Okay,” Matt mumbles to himself, crawling forward and hooking his hands under the back of your knees to pull you closer to him, his thumbs caressing your skin. “Are you sure you’re ready? You know there’s no turning back from this, right?”
“I’m as ready as I’ll ever be,” You grin as you wiggle against him excitedly. “Give me what you got, sweetheart.”
“Don’t call me that.” Matt clicks his tongue against his teeth, shaking his head as he slowly eases his cock into you. Slowly, your eyes start to widen at the stretch, the burn obvious in your core and thighs, and your hand flies down to his in hopes to slow down his movements despite him going as slow as he possibly can.
You try to breathe steadily through your nose, lips pressed together tightly as your wince at the uncomfortable ache that spreads, your pussy clamping down on him as if you were trying to prevent him from pushing any further.
“Ow.” You whisper, twisting your hips to try and get comfortable and relax but you wince at each movement you make, causing Matt to raise his gaze from where you’re connected to look into your eyes, his own pooling with concern.
“Are you okay?”
You hum with a curt nod of your head, “Nothing of that significant size has been up there before, you know? I’m just… feeling uncomfortable, that’s all.”
Matt’s lips curl into a grin, “You calling my dick big?”
You send him a hardened glare, “Not as big as your fucking head.”
Matt laughs loudly and he lays his hand flat across your lower stomach as he adjusts himself between your legs, head ducking down slightly to watch himself slowly push into you once more, but the second your legs tense up, he sighs apologetically and strokes your stomach, sliding his cock out of you and you whine at the sudden feeling of emptiness, looking at him with a pout.
“Give me a second, okay?” Matt orders you, gently grabbing your waist to help turn you around on all fours. The brows pinch together at the new position, but your body seems to relax when you feel his hands slide around your back and press down tightly, arching it to hold you in place as you feel his cock at your entrance once more. “This should feel better. But tell me if it hurts? I don’t want to hurt you anymore.”
“Just—” You grit your teeth together. “Just fuck me, Matt.”
“You got it.” Matt whispers as he pushes himself back into you again at a slower pace and you gasp, your fingers gripping the arm of the couch, head dropping low to rest on the cushions as you try to control your breathing. The new position was definitely better than the last, but you can still feel him stretch you out to fit you around his cock. “Is my dick really that big?”
“Are you asking because you’re concerned or because you want me to boost your ego?”
Matt smiles, “Maybe both.”
You don’t even get the chance to retaliate with your own snarky comment as Matt fills you up completely, hips pressing to your ass and cry out at how full you’re feeling, unable to think properly as he pulls back, leaving the tip nestled in your cunt before thrusting back in.
Matt curses loudly behind you, fingers digging into your ski as he rocks his hips into you, his thrusts sending your body jerking forwards. You squeeze around his cock and he grunts, changing his pace and you can’t help but fuck youtself back onto him, whining and panting at the pleasure that swirls in the pit of your tummy. 
The lewd sounds of skin slapping against skin is enough to have your eyes rolling back in pleasure, driving you even closer to the edge along with his rapid thrusts and continuous cursing. You’re positive you can even hear him praise you a little bit, muttering about how tight your pussy is. 
You would’ve never guessed he was into such dirty talk. Matt continues to amaze you.
Your pussy clamps around his cock when you feel his hand sneak beneath your body to reach between your thighs, the pads of his fingers rubbing diligent circles on your clit and you mewl, your own hand coming down to latch around his wrist.
“Shit,” You slur your words, drool seeping past the corner of your lips. “So good—fuck, Matt, don’t stop—s’good.”
“You’re funny if you think I’m gonna stop.” Matt chuckles behind you and you can feel the tears build up in your waterline as Matt leans over your body, holding himself up with one hand on the arm of the couch, his other still rubbing circles on your clit. You gasp as how deep he’s nestled within you and it has you seeing stars, your toes curling and your body tensing up as his cock fucks into your cunt, repeatedly hitting that spot over and over before your second orgasm of the night hits you violently. 
Your screams are muffled by the cushions, walls pulsating around his cock as you cum, struggling to hold up your own weight as your body falls limp on the couch. Pleasure buzzes through your veins and it sends you mind whirling as Matt fucks you through it to reach his own high, moving his hand from your clit to rest on your lower back, arching your ass up to fuck you deeper.
“Where do you want me to cum?” He pants heavily, thumb stroking the bottom of your spine. “Fuck—tell me where I can cum.”
“Anywhere you want.” You slur your words, craning your head to the side to look at him, capturing how his eyes widen slightly.
“Anywhere?” Matt repeats as he slows down his movements and you nod your head, only to yelp in shock when he pulls out of you completely and flips your body around once more. You stare at him in surprise as he crawls up your body, resting a hand on your cheek and pulling down your bottom lip with his thumb. “Here?”
You don’t give him a verbal answer, instead you open wide, welcoming him and Matt grins, pushing the head of his cock into your mouth and sighing as your lips close around him, suckling on his tip as he cums in long spurts down your throat, brows knitting together in pleasure and moaning softly as your tongue presses against his slit, swallowing everything he gives you. 
There’s a comfortable silence as Matt removes himself from above you, choosing to drop down in the limited space between your body and the couch, running his fingers through his sweaty hair as he tries to catch his breath.
It takes you a few seconds to comprehend what had just happened, staring between Matt’s naked lower half and yours before you abruptly sit up, rolling onto your knees that pop as you stare down at him incredulously. 
“Matt!” You screech, punching his shoulder with such force that has him wincing. 
“Ow!” He hisses, rubbing the area. “Why—”
“Why the fuck didn’t you tell me you were that good?” You immediately cut him off, not allowing him to finish as you shake your head quickly. “We should’ve done this ages ago!”
Matt rolls his eyes in annoyance despite the grin that spreads across his cheeks as he throws his arm over his face, “Shut up.”
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“Okay, so, let me get this straight,” Nick pauses to chew and swallow his sandwich, pointing between you and Matt on the opposite side of the table. “You two decided to hook up last night because neither of you have hooked up with anyone in a long time, and now you’ve made some sort of deal that when you can’t find release somewhere else, you’ll go to each other?”
“Yeah.”
“What the actual fuck?!” Nick exclaims, looking at you both as if you’ve grown an extra head before abruptly turning to Chris and Tyler who are sitting beside each other silently, watching everything unfold. “Why are you guys saying anything?!”
“I don’t think it’s as bad as you’re making it out to be,” Chris shrugs his shoulders nonchalantly before he turns his attention to you, furrowing his eyebrows. “Although, I am kind of offended you didn’t ask me to fuck you.”
You grimace, “It makes me queasy thinking about where your dick has been, if I’m honest.”
“When was the last time you got tested?” Matt teases his younger triplet, a slight smirk curling at the ends of his lips as he leans back into his chair, hands shoved deep into his pockets as he manspreads. Chris rolls his eyes and retaliates by throwing him the middle finger.
“And you’re okay with this?” Nick questions Tyler who slowly nods his head as he rolls a blunt beneath the table, lips pursed in concentration. 
“Why wouldn’t I be?” Tyler questions back, lifting his gaze to Nick and raising a brow before looking back down to his lap. “We just fuck, that’s it. And besides, sometimes I get so faded that I can’t even get my dick up. She needs good dick and I can’t give it to her when I’m that out of it.”
You gasp in awe, reaching across the table to grip his arm. “You are so thoughtful!”
“So I’m the only sane fucking person that thinks this is a stupid idea?” Nick shakes his head in disbelief, biting into his sandwich with a deep sigh. His eyes suddenly widen, a piece of lettuce hanging from his mouth as he erratically pats his pockets. “Where’s Nate? Somebody text Nate right now.”
“Please, you know damn well Nate isn’t going to give a shit,” Chris cackles with a grin, adjusting the beanie on his head. “Pretty sure he fucked his girl best friend last year.”
“Yeah? And where is she now?” Nick looks at all of you expectedly for an answer and you frown, sinking into your seat with your arms crossed over your chest. “Exactly.”
“Come on, kid, it’s not like that…” Matt tries to explain. “We talked about it. We’re not doing any of that exclusive or official title stuff. We’re not making it weird.”
“Meaning we can still hook up with whoever we want.” You add on, eyes flickering over to Tyler and you give him a pretty smile, only for him to look back at you with a smirk and give you a flirtatious wink.
“So, what I’m hearing is,” Chris pauses, leaning his elbows on the table and resting his chin on the palm of his hand as he bats his eyelashes at you. “There’s still a chance for me?”
Nick immediately plugs his ears as he repeatedly mumbles, “I don’t not want to hear this. Stop it immediately. I hate it.”
“Hate what?” Nate’s voice interrupts from behind and you whiz around in your seat, grinning widely as you see Nate approaching your table with his hockey jersey in one hand and his books in the other. 
He greets you all with a smile, placing his belongings down on the table before grabbing an empty chair from another, the metal legs scraping across the floor as he drags it to place beside Matt, slapping his hand down on Matt’s shoulder in greeting as he sits down. 
“What are you talking about anyway?”
“They hooked up,” Nick immediately jumps straight into it as he points at the two of you and you sigh, throwing your head back in frustration. Matt laughs beside you. “And they’re going to continue to hook up whenever they don’t have anyone else to go to, so—”
“Oh, nice man.”
Nick stares at Nate, “No. Not nice. Not nice at all,” Nick shakes his head. “You’re all helpless. Dumb and helpless, every single one of you.”
Nate pulls a face, “I mean, it’s not as bad as you’re making it out to be—”
“That’s what I said~” Chris sings.
“And besides, they’re grown adults. They can do whatever they want.” Nate’s words make your brows raise with little surprise, watching as he flips open his book and grabs the pen that rests behind his ear, biting the cap off with his teeth before looking at you. “I’m surprised it took you both this look to actually hook-up… I thought it would’ve happened months ago.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Just means I thought you two would’ve fucked months ago.” Nate smiles and shrugs his shoulders innocently, blowing the cap out of his mouth and watching it with his hand before he begins to scribble on the pages. You roll your eyes, glancing over at Matt who shrugs his own shoulders, not fully understanding the meaning of Nate’s words but chooses not to dwell on it any longer as he reaches for his drink, sipping through the straw as he gives his attention to Chris who angles his phone in his direction to show him something you could barely see. 
Nick shakes his head, still in disbelief as he shoves the last remaining bite of his sandwich into his mouth before grabbing his book out of his backpack to take notes alongside Nate. He then comically raises his head up to point his pen at you and Matt.
“Also, just to let you know, I don’t want to hear any complaining from either of you when this whole situationship bullshit ends up going to literal shit,” Nick warns before he slowly turns to the pen to point to himself, “Because I will laugh in your face and simply say, ‘I told you so’.”
A scoff leaves your lips as Matt speaks, “Relax, kid. Everything is going to be fine. Plus, this whole thing could just be a one time thing… It might not even happen again,” Matt turns to look at you. “Right?”
A smile finds its way onto your face as you lean your elbows on the table, chin resting on the palm of your hand as you give him an affirmative nod. “Right.”
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“Fuck, Matt.” You moan out his name repeatedly, back arching off your bed, gripping the pillows resting behind your head with your mouth wide open. Matt’s fingers pump in and out of your pussy, squirting over his hand and splashing onto the bed sheets below you. 
He laughs as you shove your face into the crook of your arm, body trembling and breathing whines slipping past your lips from the overwhelming sensation of him fucking you with his fingers.
Your legs clamp shut around his hand but he’s already prying you back open with the other, holding them down to the bed as his fingers curl upwards, almost bringing you to tears at the pleasure in the pit of your tummy. 
“There we go…” Matt hums softly, milking you for every drop you can give. You quiver and gasp when Matt comes to a stop, the grin on his face evident as he pulls his fingers from your cunt and you whine, struggling to raise your foot and kick him in his side. He captures your ankle in his grasp, drawing circles with his fingertips. “You good?”
“You good?” You mock him, tone nasally. Your arms flop to your side as you take a deep breath, ignoring the way Matt’s laughing at you. “That was intense… I felt like I was going crazy.”
“Thank you,” Matt grins, eyes twinkling as he slips off your bed. “Your need to change your sheets though.”
“Wow. So gentlemanly of you to offer to help.” You mutter sarcastically under your breath, clicking your tongue against your teeth. You stand up from the bed and your knees buckle beneath you, causing you to panic and immediately reach out and grab onto a surface to steady yourself, throwing the middle finger up in Matt’s direction when he chuckles. 
He tells you to go shower while he takes care of the sheets and you immediately oblige, patting his arm in a quick thanks as you wobble out of your bedroom and into the bathroom, eager to clear yourself up after previous activities. 
You take longer than usual to shower, taking your time to scrub your body clean and even wash your hair, not even caring about what Matt could be doing inside your home as he waits for you, but you pause your routine when you actually begin to think about your relationship with Matt. 
It’s been almost three weeks since you started hooking up with Matt, showing up at each other's places whenever you’re in need of sex, getting it over and done with before hanging out properly, before even getting a bite to eat or binge watching a series. 
You still sleep with Tyler. You’ve even fucked Tyler and Matt on the same day. Matt doesn’t care, of course he doesn’t, and personally neither do you. But there have been a few moments where you start to recall the amount of times you had chosen Matt over Tyler… and it was a lot. 
You and Matt are supposed to fuck whenever you have no one else to go to. And yet, give the choice… you still chose Matt. 
A loud call of your name and a fist banging against the bathroom door startles you out of your thoughts, “I need to piss. Hurry up!”
“Just come in!” You yell back at him, frowning as you face the stream of water to let the soap run off your body as you mumble, “It’s not like you haven’t barged in before.”
You hear the door creak open behind the shower curtain and you poke your head around just in time for Matt to unzip his pants to relieve himself, his head tilting back with a sigh of relief. 
His eyes meet yours when he turns his head and his brows knit together, giving you an odd look. “What?”
“Can I ask you a question?” He blinks before giving you a quick nod. “Are you still fucking other people?”
“Yeah,” That answer relieves you a bit. “I was with Sadie last weekend.”
“I have another question.”
“Why are you—”
“I’m asking the questions,” You cut him off and Matt laughs, nodding for you to continue as he zips up his pants and washes his hands. “Has Sadie, or any other girl, been available on the same day that I’ve been available? Or asked you to come over?”
“Uh…” Matt ponders for a moment, bottom lip poking out his deep thought as he dries his hands on a towel. “Yeah, I think so.”
“And who did you end up choosing?”
“You.”
It shocks you at how fast he answers your question and you grip the shower curtain for support, the slippery floor of the shower almost making you tumblr. He chose you too… is that wrong? You’re uncertain and it makes you feel a little uneasy. Surely there must be a reasonable explanation to why you choose each other instead of fucking other available people.
“Why are you asking me that anyway?”
“Curious,” You answer quickly as you close the curtain to block him out and continue showering, ignoring the way he’s mumbling under his breath how strange you are. “Wait. I have another question.”
“Ask me when you’re down showering.”
“Why?” The tone of your voice turns sultry as you smirk, “Is knowing I’m naked behind this shower curtain turning you on?”
Matt doesn’t answer. Instead, his arm shoots out from behind the curtain, hand curling around the faucet tap to turn the temperature of the water, laughing like a maniac as he hears you scream from the cold water that splashes your skin.
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You hated birthdays.
Actually, you hated your birthday. 
You hated knowing you’re getting older each year, desperately wanting to go back to the ages where all you worried about was not making a fool of yourself in front of someone you had a crush on, or not knowing the biggest high school gossip about who was seeing who behind whoever’s back.
Now, at your growing age, all you worry about is failing college and not being able to get a good enough job to provide a future for yourself.
You wish nobody knew it was your birthday, but having such a close group of groups who knew you better than you knew yourself, it wasn’t going to be easy, and you almost spun around and darted out of campus when you saw Chris twirling a gift bag in hand with helium balloons that spelt out ‘birthday girl!’ in big, bold letters tied to his wrist. 
“There she is!”
You wanted the ground to swallow you up.
“Happy birthday!” Chris yells loudly when you reach their circle, letting your backpack drop to the grass beside Tyler who looks up at you with a dopey smile. Chris shoves the gift bag into your hands when you finally sit down, huffing at the weight of the bag. “I bought you something.”
“I told him not to, I promise,” Nick tells you as he applies chapstick before he leans in close, “But as always, Chris doesn’t fucking listen.”
“And I never will,” Chris grins, untying the strip of balloons from around his wrist to tie them around your own, ignoring the dark glare you give him as he smiles at you cheekily. “Look inside. It’s all the essentials you need.”
“I swear to god, if you—”
“Shh,” He pressed his finger against your lips. “Less talking, more looking.”
You roll your eyes, swatting his finger away from your face before peering into the bag. A soft, genuine laugh leaves your lips when you first see two bottles of your favourite alcoholic beverage and a few chocolates, but you immediately cease all laughter and amusement when you see a pack of condoms and a Plan B box sandwiched between the pair. 
Tyler peeks over your shoulder to drop a pre-rolled joint and a few gummies into the bag for later, but makes a funny noise when he sees the condom pack. He dips his hand inside the bag to pull it out, throwing it back at Chris who fumbles to catch it.
“Hey—”
“She doesn’t use condoms.”
Chris gapes, slowly turning his head towards you with widened eyes. He leans forward, nose brushing against yours as he speaks, “Are you sure you don’t want to fuck me?”
Nick yells and covers his ears, threatening to punch his youngest sibling in the throat as Nate and Tyler snort.
“Positive,” You giggle and pat his cheek, causing him to whine and slump back into his own space in defeat. “I’m thankful for the gifts, but please… you know I hate celebrating my birthday. And were the balloons really necessary too? Did you have to make it more obvious?”
Chris frowns, tugging at the string. “But the balloons are pretty.”
“She doesn’t like balloons, kid.”
Your head whizzes around so quickly you’re positive you could hear it crack at the speed, a grin spreading across your cheeks when you see Matt standing behind you looking at your balloons in disgust. But your eyebrows raise in surprise when you see Sadie standing beside him.
You greet her with a wave and she reciprocates, wishing you a quiet happy birthday which you thank her for and motioning for them both to join you in your circle, but Sadie shakes her head with an apology, announcing that she has to be somewhere else.
You watch as she places her hand on Matt’s bicep, asking if they can meet up later but Matt shakes his head, telling her that he already has plans and her face deflates for a moment before nodding, bidding him and the rest of you a goodbye before leaving. 
Matt lets out a huff as he drops down to the grass, stretching out his legs and knocking his foot against yours, mouthing you a quick happy birthday and you smile in gratitude. 
“Sadie seems to be hanging out with you a lot recently,” Nate points out and Nick nods his head in agreement. “You like her?”
Matt shakes his head, “No. She was just asking me if I wanted to do something this weekend.”
“Are you?”
“No,” Matt mindlessly starts plucking the glass, avoiding everyone's eyes as they zone in on him. “I don’t have the time. Got some assignments to finish for my classes.”
Hearing him say that he hasn’t got the time sparks interest in you, and you begin to wonder if Matt would end up asking you for some well needed release. It excites you, especially when you realise you haven’t been under him or on top of him in a few days and you press your thighs together at the thought of possibly getting dicked down sooner rather than later. 
It’s a birthday gift, you say to yourself when you try to give an excuse to why you’re so needy to be fucked by Matt. It’s just a birthday gift… yet, you have Tyler right beside you, someone who’s easily available and someone who used to be frequent in giving you the best birthday sex of your life.
You could ask Tyler to come over tonight, but why wasn’t the question being asked? Why does it feel like you’re stopping yourself from asking something so simple and easy?
Perhaps you’re so used to sleeping around with Matt that it doesn’t even occur to you to ask someone else anymore. Tyler doesn’t seem bothered, maybe because he’s been getting his fix elsewhere too, so why does it bother you?
A quiet call of your name brings you out of your thoughts and you turn your head towards the source, gazing landing on Matt who is looking back at you with a kind smile. 
He shuffles further into the circle to get closer to you, voice dipping low. “Come home with me later? I have something for you.”
“What is it?” You instantly ask back, excitement evident in your tone. Even though you weren’t the biggest fan of celebrating your birthday and receiving gifts, there was no doubt in your mind that Matt was probably one of the best people to receive gifts from, knowing he usually goes above and beyond to give you the most memorable birthday. 
You smile when you remember the three-day spa voucher he gave you last year when he and his brothers had taken you away for the weekend, it was the most breathtaking cabin you had ever been to. The sunset above the lake was still photographed in your memory, so was the midnight drive he took you on when Chris and Nick were sleeping.
The sights were beautiful, and you were grateful to have seen it with your best friend.
“You’ll find out.” Matt tells you with a smile, refusing to give you a hint of any sort as he turns his attention to Nick to engage in a conversation. You pout, shoulders slumping in defeat and Chris knocks his arm against yours, voice teasing as he whispers in your ear;
“Looks like my gifts will come in handy after all—OW!”
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“This is actually fucking ridiculous.” You giggle as you’re blindingly walking into Matt’s dorm, his hands covering your eyes to prevent you from seeing even though you’ve tried countless times to peek through the gaps between his fingers.
Matt’s chest rumbles against your back as he laughs, waiting for you to toe off your shoes at the entrance before leading you further into the room.
You have the layout completely mapped out in your head from the amount of times you’ve been at his place, already knowing that he’s leading you into the kitchen just by the cold marbling that you feel beneath your feet. 
You almost trip as Matt shoves you down onto a chair and whispers a countdown in your ears before he removes his hands from your face. Your vision is blurry for a moment and you try to adjust to your surroundings with a few blinks, jaw dropping in complete awe as the splotches begin to disperse and you see what’s presented in front of you.
“Are you kidding me?” You whisper softly in astonishment at the gifts that are laid out across the table. You spot a few of your favourite scented candles stacked on top of each other, a bottle of perfume that you were one hundred percent certain that was sitting in your wishlist on an online store you were browsing a few days prior, and a miniature bag with the logo of your favourite jewellery store. 
You feel extremely overwhelmed, the urge to cry becoming harder to keep at bay as your eyes water and string, throat tightening over how thoughtful Matt had been. 
You turn your head towards him with your bottom lip quivering and Matt snickers, pulling a party hat from god knows where and advancing closer to you.
“You asshole…” You insult jokingly, using the sleeves of your shirt to wipe at your eyes, hoping that the tears wouldn’t dare fall as Matt secures the hat on top of your head. You point to it, “Isn’t this a little cheesy?”
Matt rolls his eyes, snapping the elastic band against your chin for extra measure and you hiss at the slight sting it causes, punching his arm in retaliation but he pays no mind, smiling to himself as he turns his back to you for a moment to open the refrigerator door, pulling out a white squared box.
He balances it on the palm of his hand with ease, using his foot to kick the door shut as he makes his way back to you. 
You’re grinning widely at the thought of what could be inside the box, even though you’ve already guessed it’s a cake. Your hands rub together excitingly as Matt places it on the counter and gently slides it over to you, the box still in his grasp as it stops in front of you, drumming his fingers on the cardboard. 
Sensing your eagerness, Matt lifts the lid off of the box and the excitement on your face drops almost instantly, expressionless as you peek inside to see the miniature spongebob themed cake staring back at you.
You raise your head to see Matt already grinning at you, tongue poking at his cheek as he opens up a drawer to retrieve two plastic forks, twiddling them between his fingers.
You deadpan, “Are you sure we’re not celebrating your birthday right now?”
“Be quiet, you like spongebob just as much as I do,” Matt scoffs as he hands over one of the plastic forks and you take it with a smile. You go to cut out a piece for yourself but freeze when Matt makes a weird noise, gazing up at him in alarm. “Wait. Hold on—my god—let me take a photo first.”
You roll your eyes but happily oblige as Matt fishes his phone out of his pocket and angles it towards you. You pose, pointing to the cake with a wide smile, almost blinded by the flash when Matt takes the picture and you immediately rub at your eyes, trying to get rid of the blotches while spitting a few creative curse words that make him giggle.
He quickly takes the opportunity of you being blinded to slide beside you, holding his phone high to take a selfie and you poke out your tongue, using your free hand to cup Matt’s cheeks while he rests his on top of your head. 
Before you have the chance to complain about how hungry you are, you gasp in shock when you feel the coldness of the cake’s frosting rubbed on your cheek and the shutter of the camera goes off when Matt takes another photo, capturing you mid chaos as you dig your fingers into the side of the cake to smush a piece against his own cheek, grinning evilly as the yellow frosting covers his skin. 
“Alright, alright. I deserved that,” Matt sighs with a lighthearted laugh, making sure his phone is tucked away and out of the icing zone. “Makes a good blackmail photo though, don’t you think?”
“If that goes anywhere, I will kill you.”
“You already know that’s going on my Instagram, sweetheart.” Matt teases you and you scoff jokingly, shaking your head as you reach for the napkins that are laying conveniently at the side, trying your best to wipe away the frosting before it drops and stains your clothing. 
Matt manages to clean himself up pretty easily and decides to help you out when he notices you struggling, plucking a spare napkin from the pile and he takes a hold of your jaw, facing your towards him as he gently wipes at your cheek, careful not to rub too hard at your skin. 
You’re suddenly awkward of the close proximity and you grow silent, watching as you cleans you up diligently. The concentrated look on his face is what causes your stomach to whirl and heart bloom with warmth, his eyebrows furrowed and gaze zoned in on the area he needs to clean, tongue licking over his bottom lip.
“Matt…” You call out his name quietly to grab his attention and he pauses, staring right at you. He seems to slowly take notice of how close you both are, taking in the limited space between you both and he goes to remove his hand away from your face but stops himself short with a noise, bringing his hand back to finish the job.
“Happy birthday, sweetheart.” Matt whispers to you once he finally wipes away the frosting from your cheeks, smiling down at you with adoration swirling in his eyes and your breathing gets caught at the back of your throat for a moment at the sudden affectionate gaze, unsure of what to say or even what to do with him looking at you the way he is.
Your hands move up to take the birthday hat off of your head, dropping it to the side carelessly as your arms curl around his shoulders, pulling him into your embrace. Matt’s arms slide around your waist, holding you close to his chest as he hugs you back, burying his face in the crevice of your neck and exhaling deeply.
“I’m so thankful,” You admit, squeezing him tight as the emotions within you struggle to be contained. “For real, Matt. I’m really grateful too… thank you for making this birthday special again.”
“It’s not over yet, you know…” Your hear him mutter in your ear and you go to pull back, to question him on what more he could possibly give to top everything else he’s down for today but he’s already bending his knees, arms falling low to lock around your thighs and throwing you over his shoulder with a huff, smacking his hand roughly against your ass as he carries your giggly self to the bedroom. 
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Friday nights will always be your favourite nights to let loose and party.
Dressing up in your prettiest outfit that makes you feel confident and sexy, decorating your body with the shiniest of jewellery you own and drinking the most intoxicated drink you could find while mingling with your friends.
Talking with your girls face to face after a week of classes had unfailingly lifted your mood, catching up with all the gossip you missed or only briefly discussed over the phone, finally adding your own two cents into situations which they eagerly agree with a nod of their heads, tapping their cups to yours before taking a sip. 
“Speaking of unusual relationships,” Sarah, one of your dearest friends, turns to look at you with a grin, “How's it going with you and Matt? Have things turned awkward yet?”
“Nope,” You shake your head, buzzing happily. “We’re fine. The whole ‘hooking up with your best friend’ culture isn’t as complicated as everyone makes it out to be. Everyone gets dramatic about it for no reason.”
Kendall lets out a heavy sigh, nursing her drink in her hand, “I don’t know how you do it. I can’t even imagine hooking up with Isaac. I mean, he’s attractive, but we’ve seen and know too much about each other to get physical on an intimate level… props to you.”
Anna shifts her gaze to you next, “Do you still fuck Tyler?”
“On occasion,” You admit. “But honestly, I’ve been so wrapped up in assignments—”
“And Matt.”
You give Sarah a smirk, “I haven’t really had the time to call up Tyler and ask him to fuck. He doesn’t mind anyways. He’s been busy smoking and selling weed for some extra cash.”
“What about Matt? Is he still fucking around?”
You pause at that, lips pursing in deep thought before you shrug your shoulders, “I don’t know. I haven’t asked recently if I’m honest.”
Kendall gestures over your shoulder, “Looks like you’re about to find out the answer.”
You crane your neck to follow the direction she’s pointing in, noticing Matt standing near a back wall with a drink in hand, deep in conversation with Sadie who’s smiling, locked on each word he’s speaking to her.
Feeling your eyes on him, Matt looks up to meet your gaze, raising his drink in greeting and you grin, lifting your own cup before he resumes back in conversation.
You take in his appearance with interest; a black fitted tank top paired with some loose fitted jeans and shoes you’re certain he definitely stole from Nick’s closet. The silver chain deer hangs from his neck and silver rings adorn his fingers. You wouldn’t admit it out loud, but he looks good.
“Take it easy with the lovey dovey eyes,” Sarah teases, nudging your shoulder to bring your attention back to her and you laugh, tipping your head back to finish the contents of your drink. “He does look good though, so I don’t blame you.”
“When was the last time you fucked Matt?” You direct your question towards Anna who shrugs her shoulders in response. 
“I don’t remember,” She smacks her lips together. “Definitely more than two months ago, that’s for sure… No disrespect to you but god, I miss his cock. How he walks around with that thing completely baffles me.”
Kendall’s eyes widened slightly, “Is Matt’s cock big?”
“Yes.”
You and Anna share a knowing smile and high give each other. You drone out the complaints Kendall makes about wanting to fuck someone with a big cock and how Isaac always sets her up with people who are both shitty in bed and lack personality, you being too focused on looking around the room to find a clear path to get more drinks and you dismiss yourself from your girls for a moment as you spot Nick and Tyler pouring vodka into each others cups.
You bound over to your favourite boys, throwing your arms around their shoulders and startling them with your presence, but Tyler hazily smiles you when he sees it’s you and presses a chaste kiss to your temple as Nick hugs you tight in greeting, offering to fill up your cup which you happily give him.
“Where have you been?” Nick asks you as Tyler takes your hand in his to twirl your around, whistling as he eyes your dress. “You look pretty.”
“Catching up with my girls because I spend way too much time with you guys,” You explain, but cheesily grin at the compliment you received on your outfit. Nick hands you your filled drink and you thank him, taking a quick sip as your eyes glance around the room, “Where’s the rest of the guys?”
“Chris is around here somewhere trying to get laid and Nate is talking to this girl he likes from his classes,” Nick informs you before he laughs. “Matt’s been talking with Sadie for the past hour—-sweet girl is trying to make her move.”
“And why aren’t you showing off your charms tonight?”
Nick’s face immediately drops, “Please. I’m done with boys. All they make me feel is absolute regret and disappointment.”
You smile in sympathy, “You’re looking at the wrong guys.”
“No,” Nick shakes his head. “They’re all the same. Everyone of them. Disgusting.”
You loop your arm around his, tugging him into your side, “What if I introduce you to this guy in my class? He’s tall… handsome… sweet…”
Nick eyes you, clearly interested in what you’re telling him and he holds his head high, “Maybe.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Chris!” You greet him happily as he appears beside Tyler, staring at you all with a confused look but grins when you throw yourself into his arms to hug him tightly, swaying you both back and forth. “I thought you were trying to get laid?”
“I was,” Chris sighs as he pulls away from the hug, but keeps an arm wrapped around your middle. “But she has a boyfriend and he’s, like, scary looking and I didn’t feel like getting nightmares for life.”
You frown, patting his shoulder. “What a shame. The dry spell continues for you.”
Chris leans into your touch, batting his eyelashes prettily at you with a smirk, “You can change that for me if you want.”
Nick fake gags behind you as you smile, “In your dreams.”
Chris sighs jokingly, dropping his head low. “Guess I’ll keep on dreaming then.”
“Dreaming about what?”
The sound of Matt’s voice has you spinning around, beaming happily as your eyes meet his but it falters slightly when you notice the fake smile he’s sporting, wanting to question him and ask him what’s wrong but you bite your tongue, not wanting to bring attention to the subject, knowing it’ll make Matt uncomfortable putting him on the spot. 
You reach out and touch his arm, giving him a comforting squeeze which makes him seem to relax, using your grip on him to tug your into his side and for Chris’ arm to slip from your waist.
“Chris is saying weird ass shit about her again,” Nick fills Matt in, wafting the smoke that Tyler blows in his face teasingly when he takes a hit of his joint. “How’s Sadie?”
“Fine,” Matt replies simply, licking at his lips as he turns to you. “Do you want to get out of here? Just me and you?”
Chris immediately takes offence to that, “What about us? What are you going to do without us?!”
Matt goes to answer but Nick immediately raises his hand, silencing him. “Don’t answer that. Just don’t.”
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You’re in complete bliss with Matt holding himself above you, your back is arched, bare chest pressed to his as he nips and licks at your neck, his hips lazily grinding into yours, cock hitting deeper than he’s ever been.
The pace is slow, something that you’re not used to when it comes to Matt, but you don’t find the voice within you to complain, enjoying it a lot more than you’d admit with your fingers tangled in his hair, cries spilling from your lips with your legs hooked over his waist.
He’s grunting in the crevice of your neck with each deep thrust, one hand caressing the side of your face while the other finds a place beside your head, holding up his weight.
You’re whining from the loss of contact when he moves his head away, missing the feeling of his teeth against your skin, the slight stubble scratching your face and you look up at him pleadingly, but he’s frozen as he stares down at you, despite his hips thrusting automatically into you. 
“Fuck, sweetheart, you’re so pretty…” You barely hear him mumble and your heart pounds against your ribcage at the complement, body feeling more heated and warm.
“Matt—”
He cuts off your words by planting his lips on yours with the most sweetest and softest kiss he’s ever given you, and you melt into the touch, fingers untangling from his hair to cup his cheeks in your palms, gasping through the kiss as Matt's cock cock slowly pulls out of your pussy before pushing back in, sending a shrill up your spine. 
The band in your tummy tightens with each slow but powerful thrust he gives you, thighs shaking around his frame, unable to keep up with his kisses as your mouth falls open with short gasps and whines, white specks flickering in your vision as your feel yourself inching closer and closer over the edge.
“Cum,” Matt whispers, breath fanning over your face as he pants, “Do it. Cum on my cock.”
You wail as the band snaps, orgasm crashing down on you violently. Your body convulses, pussy squeezing around his cock, keeping him buried deep which has him moaning, his own hips stuttering as he cums. You feel him pulse inside you, filling you up with everything he gives.
Matt’s head slumps down on your shoulder as you try to steady your breathing, wincing as you feel him slowly move his hips back to pull his cock out of your sensitive cunt, your hand falling from his face to drop down at your pussy, gathering his cum that pools out onto your fingers.
“I’m sorry,” Matt apologises against your skin, “I’m sorry, I—shit. I should’ve asked if I could—fuck. I got too overwhelmed. I’m sorry.”
“It’s kind of cute that you’re apologising,” You admit, gently pushing him off of your body to sit upright. “But you don’t need to apologise… this isn’t the first time you came inside me, Matt.”
“I know,” Matt runs his fingers through his sweaty hair. “I usually ask...”
“Matt. It’s fine,” You reassured him, placing your palm on his bicep. “I’ll forgive you a thousand times more if you help clean me up though.”
Matt smiles and nods his head as he slips off the bed, disappearing out of the room for a moment and returning with a wet towel. He sits between your parted legs, gently cleaning up the mess, whispering apologies and apologies every time you wince when he presses down on sensitive areas, thighs closing around his hand which he carefully pries open to resume his job. 
You sit in silence, watching him, frowning at the troubled look you see on his face, not used to seeing Matt being so closed off with his feelings and emotions, especially towards you. He hasn’t been open and honest with you in the past few weeks, he hasn’t come to you and asked for your reassurance or help. 
It makes you feel a little bit defeated. 
Something is different, and you struggle to pinpoint what it is.
The questions lay on the tip of your tongue, desperate to be brought to light and asked, and even more desperate to get the answers you’ve been craving. Your relationship with Matt has changed since the proposition you’ve made about sleeping together, but he’s still your best friend.
“What’s going on?” You finally ask and Matt freezes, fingers clutching the wet towel in his grasp tightly. “And please don’t lie to me… I can tell when you’re being truthful or not—”
“What am I to you?” Matt suddenly asks and you’re a little thrown off at your question being answered with his own question. He takes his hand away completely as you blink at him, feeling confused. “Even with all this going on… what am I to you?”
“You’re my best friend?”
Matt seems to frown deeply at that, “So nothing has changed? At all? Even with us sleeping together? I’m still your best friend?”
“Wh—of course!” You’re baffled, assuming that with the way Matt is speaking about your situationship, that he is worried that you have gained some negative feelings towards him. It hurts you, and you’re eager to reassure him, to let him know that everything is okay. “Matt, you’ll always be my best friend. We promised nothing would change, right? I’m keeping that promise.”
Matt closes his eyes as his shoulders sink in defeat, “I…” He drops his head with a sigh. “I can’t do this anymore.”
You bring your knees up to your chest, “Do what?”
“This,” He gestures between the two of you. “I just… I can’t. Not anymore. I can’t continue sleeping with you.”
“Oh.” You swallow thickly, feeling something heavy weighing in your throat. “Why?”
“Things have changed,” His voice is quieter now and it makes your heart shatter at the tone. Does he hate you? “I can’t continue whatever this is and be your best friend at the same time, it has to stop. It—” Matt sighs, rubbing at his forehead. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine,” You mutter as your chin rests on your knees, hugging your legs closer to your chest to cover your modesty. You refuse to even look at him now, finding interest in the sheets below you as your throat tightens up more, feeling sick at the thought of him hating you so much that he can’t even continue sleeping with you. “I’m sorry too. I don’t know what I did to make you hate me, but I—”
“Wait what?”
“—I’m just so sorry. Especially if I came across too forward and for putting you in such a position, I know you were so hesitant about this in the direct place.” You’re babbling now, unable to take control of yourself due to the overwhelming feeling that washed over you. “I’m so fucking sorry, Matt.”
“Wait… I don’t—”
“Can we not tell the others right now?” You raise your head to meet his eyes this time. He’s looking straight at you, confusion and disbelief swimming in his irises but you ignore it, chewing the inner skin of your cheek. “Mostly Nick. I don’t really want to hear him laugh in our faces and give us the whole ‘I told you so’ speech he threatened us with at the start.”
Matt calls out your name and extends his hand to touch you, but you’re already climbing off of the bed, searching around for your underwear and dress that was thrown across the room earlier.
You’re too embarrassed to continue on with the conversation, to ask him what exactly you did to make him grow to hate you so suddenly. Truthfully, you didn’t really want to dwell on it too much, the pain of losing someone like Matt already making your heart ache. 
You just wanted to go home—to be in the comfort of your own bed and curse yourself out, and probably cry to the point you might just forget everything that just happened. You are feeling a little teary, but you wouldn’t dare cry in front of Matt right now. 
“I’ll, uh, see you around or something,” You sniffle, shoving the heels onto your feet and casting one final look his way. “I’m sorry.”
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It’s been almost two weeks since your last encounter with Matt.
You shouldn’t be avoiding him like you are. It’s childish, you know that. But you can’t force yourself to face someone who used to be your best friend and now seemingly hates your guts.
Maybe you should’ve waited a few more minutes, to give him enough time to explain the entire situation and how he was feeling but you were selfish, you didn’t want to hear him explain in full detail what you had done to make him change his feelings towards you so negatively. 
You miss him. Of course you miss him. For years he’s been your best friend—your other half, more like. There was no you without Matt and vice versa. You weren’t exactly sure on how you could continue moving on without Matt by your side, as dramatic as it sounds… but you’ve always been a little dramatic. 
His brothers, Nate and Tyler have been blowing up your phone—-courtesy of you ignoring them too, not wanting to hear Nick rub it in your face on how the ‘friends with benefits bullshit’ you had with Matt actually did go to shit. You also didn’t want to hear the others continuously ask questions about what happened and what had changed. 
Even your roommate, someone who keeps herself out of your business and hardly ever bothers you, had cornered you one morning at breakfast, asking why you looked so glum and why the ‘shirtless and tattooed Boston fuckboy’ wasn’t joining you both anymore.
You’re not the type to let anyone know your worries, so you’re surprised when you find yourself explaining to your roommate about what happened in full detail.
She gave you an unimpressed look, calling you a little stupid for not staying behind and listening despite you letting it be known that you couldn’t bear to listen to why his feelings turned negative towards you. Your face twisted and turned, offended by her harsh words but you allowed yourself to let her talk and not interrupt even though you desperately wanted to.
“You jumped to your own conclusion,” She told you when she was collecting the dishes. “You know, for two close best friends who talk to each other every second of the day, you have some major miscommunication issues.”
So, that’s what leads you to now; you sitting alone in the living room with your phone in hand, staring down at yours and Matt’s chat with your thumb between your teeth, biting down on the skin anxiously as you try to figure out how to start a conversation, to let him know you’re ready to listen.
from you: i think we should talk….
from matt: good because im almost at your house anyway. I had to go get something.
from you: ???? u coming over
from matt: yes from matt: i was going to make you listen to me from matt: its kinda important kid. 
You snort at his message, sending a quick thumbs up emoji before throwing your phone to the side, awaiting his arrival. Your leg nervously shakes in the corner of your vision and your eyebrows knit together, placing your hand down on your knee and squeezing tight.
As if that will stop you from being nervous. 
You’re about to hear the reasoning behind why Matt's feelings had changed for you so negatively, nothing can prepare you for it. 
Just bite the bullet. Take it like a champ.
The rapid knocking on the door rips you out of your thoughts and your head slowly turns with a confused look sketched upon your features. Was that Matt? Matt never knocks—he freely walks in like it’s his own place usually, always making himself at home.
You push yourself up from the couch and make your way towards the front door, taking a peek through the peephole to see Matt’s form, teeth nibbling at his bottom lip with his hands behind his back, swaying back and forth nervously. You grow even more confused and concerned, pulling open your door to face him fully.
“Why did you knock—”
“Hate you?!” Matt suddenly cuts you off with a shout, startling you with the loudness of his tone. His eyes are wide as he stares at you, full of disbelief. “Hate you, I—fuck—how could I hate you?! I’d never hate you… god, you’re so frustrating sometimes.”
Your lips quirk upwards, “Nice to see you too?”
“I don’t hate you. At all. When I told you that things have changed, I didn’t mean anything bad by it… I pretty much meant the opposite…” Matt’s words trail off and before you can even get the chance to ask him to explain exactly what he means, air gets caught at the back of your throat and you struggle to speak as he pulls his hands from behind his back; a bag of candy in one and a handful of ripped up flowers in the other. Your heart thumps rapidly. “I’m going to tell you something and I just… I need you to listen to me.”
You barely whisper, “Okay.”
“Being in this friends with benefits relationship with you was not as easy as I thought it would be,” Matt tells you, his honesty making you pull your attention away from the gifts in his hands to meet his gaze. “We promised each other that we’re not going to involve any titles to make it complicated for us… yet here I am, standing in front of you with the same candy and flowers in my hand from when we first met, about to confess my fucking feelings to you, I’m so—”
“You’re rambling.” You cut him off, a smile creeping onto your lips.
“Yeah, of course I am,” Matt laughs at himself, shaking his head as he awkwardly scratches the back of his neck before he straightens out, keeping his eyes on yours. “I fell for you. Hard. I think I sort of realised it on your birthday but I didn’t want to say anything just in case whatever I was feeling wasn’t what I thought it was… but when we were at that party and I saw you from across the room, talking with your friends, I realised how much I actually do fucking like you and that it wasn’t just my dick talking.”
You snort as you repeat, “Dick talking.”
“Shut up,” Matt smiles at you, his own laugh fleeting past his lips before he sighs, “I like you. I’m falling in love with you, and I get it if you want to reject me because of how fucking weird this whole thing turned out… but I would actually like to continue being with you, not just as a best friend but as your boyfriend.”
You’re too busy repeating his confession in your head to notice that Matt is waiting for an answer, bottom lips tucked between his teeth as he bites down nervously, visibly shaking out of excitement or fear due to the fact he just confessed his entire feelings—you weren’t sure which one was right.
The silence from you kills Matt and his face drops when you step forward to quietly take the flowers and candies out of his hands, taking a step back inside your house. His shoulders slump in defeat, taking your nonverbal response as a rejection to his proposal of him being your boyfriend.
He goes to turn around, to get the fuck off your doorstep and drive home, hoping that the intense embarrassment he feels coursing through his veins is enough to make him disappear.
But he freezes mid escape when he hears the rustling of you ripping open the pack of candies, spinning around to see you looking at him with the prettiest smile.
He watches, heart thumping wildly, stomach fluttering with nervousness and excitement as you extend your arm out, angling the bag in his direction and a grin spreads across his face, unable to control the happiness that bursts from within.
You’re giving him a treat, you’ve giving him a relationship.
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©sturnioz
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princesstillyenna · 9 months
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Before puck drop on the conference finals… group chat wellness check? Especially the Oilers and Maple Leafs. I don’t think there are any Bruins in the gc but watching them hug Bergeron as they left the ice was rough
YOU COME HERE? INTO MY HOUSE BLOG and ask me about the FEELINGS OF THE BRUINS????
No fr fr tho I did see that handshake line and it was very sad.
BUT a wellness check... and a couple of lil spoilers for upcoming gc
Gabe's in surgery - he's recovering, poor Baberiel.
EJ's down in Cali with Paul, holed up and trying not to think about the future.
JT is feeling like the WORLDS WORST CAPTAIN because obviously if he were a BETTER CAPTAIN the leafs would have made it further (he's wrong. It wasn't on him)
Freddie is stressed. Because he NEEDS to prove that he can make it in the postseason but he's not getting as many starts as he WANTS, but also he's won way more games than he's lost. So overall. He's ok
Auston is in carolina, hiding in Fred's apartment. Being his biggest cheerleader and being secretly grateful that they never had to play 5OT
Jacky is mourning the loss of his tooth. Also playoffs are HARD why did nobody tell him that playoff hockey was hard? I mean, obviously he figured it out pretty quickly, but yeah, that's so fucking different to regular season hockey... why did nobody mention it? (spoiler alert, they did)
JSoup is very happy about Jacky's lil tooth gap which he thinks is the cutest thing ever. He lowkey doesn't care about not making it any further because honestly, he wasn't getting the starts and he wasn't expecting the starts and he never knows where he's gonna be, maybe it'll be a cup contender, maybe it won't, he's just along for the ride.
Leon and Connor are fighting, because one of them thinks that they should head down to Florida to support Matthew even though they've only just been kicked out of the playoffs themselves, and the other one thinks they should give themselves a couple of weeks together to lick their metaphorical wounds and just be with each other. It is not the way round we expect.
Jeff is cheering on Carolina like he's never cheered any team on before and if you ask him he'll say it's just because they're his old teammates but truly it's because he just wants the panthers to lose...
Sid and Nate had a brief moment of "should we just go to worlds?" and then decided they were far too old and are on holiday in the sunshine working on their golf
Dylan and Alex are in Toronto chilling with the fam and generally enjoying the off season
Tyler is playing his lil socks off
Matthew is....... Matthew is pretty convinced he's walking around in a dream because none of this actually feels REAL right now. Oh, and also he learnt to advocate for himself a little bit, with some help from his boyfriend
Ritter - is in florida, enjoying "the sun" ;)
Willy and Latts are holed up in their cabin
Jeff and Richie are holed up in THEIR cabin
Danny and Claude would LOVE to be holed up in the cabin, except, well... there are children to look after and they're working hard to give Ryanne a break
Cale is... struggling. Because OK he could feel the team was different from last year but, but, they were the fucking reigning champs, and they lost? In the first round? And he needs to TALK about it, but... he doesn't feel he can talk to Carter because, well, it's a bit shitty to COMPLAIN about losing IN THE PLAYOFFS to someone who's not MADE the playoffs for the past few years
Bobby Lu is having the time of his life
Kaner is sulking. This year did NOT go to plan. Also he's now a UFA... what's with that, he could play ANYWHERE? That's not how hockey's supposed to work... he's a hockey GOD... he's supposed to STILL BE IN THE PLAYOFFS and also he'd very much like to stay in NY please, but he doesn't think that's likely to happen and he really REALLY wants to blame Vladi Tarasenko, if only the fucker wasn't so nice....
Jonny is... dealing with Sulky Peeks. And Baby Pat. And he's still sick, because chronic illness doesn't just Go Away and he's having to make tough decisions and if Peeks could stop trying to make himself the centre of the universe for just one minute... you'd think he'd be used to that by now
Key is having Big Confusing Feelings... nothing new there then. He's in his research era. We stan a man with footnotes.
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someoneinjersey · 1 month
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all I did was brush the surface of talking about my stupid rp characters with @the-one-blog-to-rule-them-all earlier and now i'm like SHOULD I GET A WEBSITE TO LOG THEM ALL WITH BIOS AND PICTURES AND STUFF I STILL KIND OF REMEMBER HOW TO DO HTML?????
no pls calm down I just like talking about myself and my shit because i'm self centered and all my likes and hobbies were discounted most of my life by my family.
yo I'm reading this book called Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents and fuuuuuuuck me its like reading about my whole fucking life and personality and my parents' personalities and Jesus Christ it's a great read but like fuck you just don't realize how fucked up things were in your childhood when its hammered into you that you didn't starve or get beaten or experience homelessness or addiction.
speaking of I am soooooo tired of talking to my mom every goddamn day like if I don't check in with her by like 6 pm she texts me like ARE YOU OKAY?!!??! like yeah I'm just doing things or sleeping or something like it is not a priority to talk to you every single damn day bro she even called the other day and instead of saying hi said "are you glad to hear from your mom?" like I don't talk to her EVERY DAY. and that's really actually emotionally manipulative because then i'm forced into answering a weird question to give her some kind of validation or trying to dodge it by just bringing up whatever she was just complaining about to distract her from it so I don't have to answer. id really love to just check in maybe once a week but I feel obligated because she's so miserable in her marriage and home and now she has this HUGE GAPING WOUND that won't heal as a complication from her transplant and it is GNARLY and it looks absolutely fake but she's suffering from it and so its like I cant even try to set a boundary right now.
my aunt was talking about having a big family get together over the summer and I was like oh yeah it'd be great if Kate and I could both come up wouldn't that be nice and like ............................ no. like I miss my extended family and I enjoyed seeing them when I went "home" in October but going up there again would mean A the stress of travel again B I cant afford traveling to begin with and C seeing my mom and her husband. I could handle my mom for like a day or something but if I have to be around her husband its absolutely horrible. plus like I don't even feel welcome back at their house because they emptied my room and redecorated it within two weeks of me moving down here. I have so much PTSD and so many triggers about going back "home". I do miss New Jersey but more in the sense of being by the water and convenient things and close cities to do stuff in and hockey games and the pride of just being from NJ but as much as I hate this place here it is NOT worth it to go back to NJ again for a long long long long long time.
blah blah blahhhh
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megnificent-reads · 3 months
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Full Measures, Rebecca Yarros - ⅗ ☆
I actually liked Fourth Wing. Anti-booktok folks, please put your guns down, I like simplicity. Iron Flame wasn’t great, but that’s not what I’m here to talk about. 
Because I liked Fourth Wing and I was bored, I decided to see what else Rebecca Yarros had going on. I read the blurb for the third book in her Flight & Glory series and thought it was interesting, so I started on book one. The book one blurb was definitely less interesting but - gotta start on one. 
It was actually pretty cute at the beginning! I’m used to reading slow-burn, and this was not that, which was exciting! The dogpiling of shit happening to December (dead dad, not only cheated on but with your best friend, etc.) was like watching a train wreck and I loved it. Unfortunately, I mostly made this blog to complain, so that’s probably the extent compliments you’re gonna get out of me. 
Josh Walker and his mouth watering rear
If I had fully processed that our love interest was a hockey player, I might not have read this. I’m sick of hockey boyfriends and I’ve never even read one before this. (No TikTok, I’m not fucking reading Icebreaker. I’ll get my sports erotica via ao3 AUs). 
He was cute for a bit, for sure. That was until December told him she actually did not want him around, at which point he followed her in a sort of “you’ll love me eventually” type of way. I’m not normally one to be that picky about this sort of thing, but it was starting to annoy me. Literally running after her when she’s trying to get to her car was weird - especially when her main issue was that she wanted him not in her business. I get it’s him proving he wants her, but at a certain point you think - if he really liked her he’d respect her boundaries, right?
Once we get past that, we get to the Drama. 
The blurb for this book mentions it - our (college age hockey coach) has a ~dark secret~. He was injured and couldn’t play hockey, he mysteriously disappears every weekend. 
Dark secret is the military, btw. 
I get it’s dramatic because her dad died in the military so she resents it now, yada yada. I didn’t really care though? I don’t know, maybe I’m expecting too much out of these simplistic romance novels, but I just wasn’t attached enough to either of them for this to really matter to me at all. I wasn’t interested to see the story progress beyond them finally dating, so I didn’t care about this either. 
I for most part just didn’t care about Josh Walker, which made the read pretty difficult near the end. 
Sidebar, I love how you can tell what authors like in men by what their characters pay attention to. December is constantly thinking about Josh’s ass. It’s mouth-watering. It’s magnificent. It’s perfectly round. Fuck this guys built hockey-arms, let me see that ass, Josh!
Discovering how Yarros really feels about women
I didn’t really encounter this in Fourth Wing and Iron Flame, so seeing the not-so-subtle misogyny every few chapters was… uncomfortable. 
Yarros uses the term “leggy brunette” three times to describe two different women. These women have a grand total of zero other attributes.
She also creates these two hockey groupies, which I guess is a thing. They are, of course, blonde women with huge boobs, that want nothing more than to fuck Josh Walker and his roomate, Jagger. I hate that name by the way. I know it’s a regular real-life name but like, I get it. He’s a frat dude.
Of course, nothing will stand in the way of our (not tomboyish, not nerdy or weird, but instead very average) ginger woman.
Rebecca Yarros does color her hair blonde, so idk what that’s about. I know the ditzy blonde girl trope is a thing, and this did come out in 2014, but I think the trope was tired even that long ago. 
Conclusion
A word to describe Full Measures would be: alright. Not great, not terrible, just alright. I’m sure this is more interesting for those in military families, but just not for me. I’ll just hope the rest of the Fourth Wing series is better than Iron Flame. 
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shadowisles-writes · 2 years
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I’m Yours [Elucien]
A/N: I couldn’t help myself so here’s an Elucien one shot that is once again literally just smut. This is another fic straight from my hockey blog and adapted for acotar. You can read on AO3 here.
Word count: 2819
Warnings: smut (18+ only please), dom/sub, spanking, 100% just filth
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Lucien leaned back against the headboard and licked his lips as Elain slowly crawled closer to his naked body. He was leaning against the headboard, legs extended in front of him and parted just enough for Elain to kneel between them. She waited patiently as he took her in, admiring every inch of her almost naked body. The red marks that littered her neck from his earlier ministrations brought sinful thoughts back to his mind. Lucien’s eyes trailed down Elain’s collar bones to her naked chest, admiring the beautiful sight until bruises caught his eye. His grip left those on her skin a few nights ago, so Lucien placed gentle, apologetic kisses on her stomach.
Lucien’s fingers brushed the hem of the flimsy lace panties he had gifted her that morning. He liked revealing lingerie, the thinner it was, the easier it was for him to rip. Elain might have complained if he didn’t spoil her with sets faster than he could destroy them. She teased him about his obsession, too, but she always put them on because she loved the way they looked.
“Beautiful,” Lucien murmured as he loosely wrapped his arms around Elain’s thighs, lips still pressing soft kisses to her stomach.
His hands ran up and down the back of her thighs, sending small shivers through her while she held onto his shoulders to steady herself. Lucien took his time kissing her sides, dipping down to her hips and letting his stubble brush over her skin. Elain’s heart jumped in her chest when he left the most gentle kiss over her belly button. It was all too much and not enough at the same time.
Lucien’s touch always did something special to her. Even when he was as soft as he was now, it was enough for Elain to turn into a dripping mess. She glanced down at him as he worshiped her body, one of her hands caressing over his hair while the other felt the strong muscles of his shoulder. The first time Elain had seen him naked she had barely believed he was real, and the sight of his body still amazed her.
Elain hummed quietly when he moved up and caught her nipple between his lips, his tongue poking out to lick the hardened bud. Lucien’s hands were still slow on her, but the prospect of what this would lead to made his caresses turn into firmer touches and little grabs. He had been hard since he kissed her against the front door when they came back from dinner and he was growing antsy.
Elain could tell the second his hands moved up to her ass. Something shifted then. Lucien’s touches went from soft to passionate as he gripped both cheeks and grunted against her skin. His kisses grew firmer, and wetness dripped down Elain’s thighs. Her panties barely covered her and were soaked through before Lucien even began kissing her.
Elain gasped softly when he guided her to turn, lips and tongue teasing her side. She faced the other way without complaint, Lucien had always been obsessed with her ass and she enjoyed the attention. He grabbed one cheek desperately and kissed the other like his life depended on it, hungry for more.
Lucien couldn’t help himself; he bared his teeth and bit into her skin. The bite was meant to be playful, but it was more than that. Elain’s body jolted from the pain, a moan leaving her lips which Lucien groaned, the action triggering something in both of them. His tongue soothed the bite a second later, but the shape of his teeth was still visible on the reddening skin. It was a deeply satisfying sight that drove Lucien to keep nibbling on her ass.
One of his hands reached forward to nudge Elain down, the other one too busy teasing the soft flesh of the cheek he wasn’t paying attention to with his mouth. He guided her to lay on her stomach while he shifted to be the one between her parted legs, his lips almost never leaving her ass.
Elain’s panties only lasted another second before he ripped them off her body and threw them somewhere in the room, his hands back to grabbing her ass before the fabric hit the floor. Soft skin was right there for him to nibble, kiss, grab and bite as much as he wanted.
Elain was wet beyond what was reasonable, and Lucien was just having a feast, humming his contentment and letting his lips drag over her skin. The teasing was driving her mad with little whimpers that only encouraged him to keep going, but he did give in a little. His hands parted her cheeks, massaging them while he dove in.
Lucien’s tongue slid right up her ass, teasing with licks and sucks. Elain moaned into the covers on the bed, shuddering from the attention he was giving her, but his hand came down with a warning smack every time she moved too much. Lucien was enjoying this, and he was far from done.
He teased Elain for so long that she was getting close to the edge without him even touching her pussy. Lucien could have been satisfied with staying down there for hours just to hear the desperate noises falling from her lips. He was taking his sweet, sweet time, edging her while she tried to find something to make her come undone.
Elain lifted herself on her forearm, her hard nipples brushing against the covers of the bed, but it only made her pussy clench without relief, which in turn forced her to fall back on her stomach. Lucien chuckled against her, proud of his effect but not enough to let himself get distracted. Elain tried to roll her hips a couple of times, earning satisfaction from her clit lightly rubbing against the bed, but that only lasted seconds. Lucien grunted in annoyance and kept her still by tightening his grip on her so much it became painful.
By the time he paid attention to her pussy, Elain was ready to explode. She had to muffle a scream as his tongue slid down to her clit. Her hips lifted to meet his mouth and Lucien allowed it because it gave him a better angle to eat her out. He sucked and licked with no shame for the wet noises his mouth made against her pussy, and Elain’s orgasm hit her faster than she could have imagined it would.
There was no keeping her still then, her hips and ass trembling while Lucien moaned and licked up the wetness dripping out of her. Her whimpers and pants were music to his ears as she came on his face. He slowed down soon after, filled by a sense of pride for making her come less than a minute after his mouth found her pussy.
Lucien’s attention went back to her ass, softer this time as he went back to kisses until Elain’s body was relaxed into the mattress and she had stopped rolling her hips every few seconds. His cock was painfully hard, and as much as he enjoyed playing with her ass, he needed to be in her. Lucien pushed himself up and admired the sight of her body underneath his, waiting for him to give her more and willing to take it all.
He didn’t give Elain more time to come down. Lucien gripped her hips and pulled just enough to angle her ass up as he shuffled closer. The head of his cock teased her entrance as he groaned, pressing forward and giving her short thrusts that barely allowed Elain to feel more than his tip.
She was already sensitive, and the teasing was only making it worse. Lucien could tell from the way she pushed her weight on one arm and reached back with the other in a silent demand for more contact. He took Elain’s hand and gave it a squeeze before letting it go, going back to covering both of her ass cheeks with his palm instead. He couldn’t get enough of the softness of her skin and the way it looked when his fingers dug into it.
“Look at you taking my cock so well,” he groaned as he buried himself with a long stroke. His hips met Elain’s ass and she choked on her breath. She was so full of him it made tears of bliss pool in her eyes. “You’re so fucking pretty,” he gave her a strong thrust and smacked her ass just enough to watch the flesh bounce. “You wanna be a good girl?” Lucien leaned forward a little, buried deep inside of her as he moved slowly to let her feel all of him.
“Yes,” Elain whimpered, a cheek resting on the bed while she gripped the bedsheets to ground herself.
“What’s your safeword, El?” Lucien remained still as he asked.
“Pineapples,” the word fell from her lips without hesitation.
Lucien hummed his approval before speaking with a rougher voice. “Say you’re mine.” He ordered as he pulled out to leave just the tip inside of her.
“I’m yours,” Elain panted, receiving a strong thrust in response. “I’m yours, Lucien,” she nearly sobbed, giving him just what he wanted.
“Again,” his blunt nails dug into the skin of her hip until she moaned out the words. “Say it.” Lucien growled, forcing her to repeat it.
“I’m yours, all yours,” the words fell from Elain’s lips over and over again while he picked up a punishing rhythm. Her pussy clenched around him with every thrust, and Lucien kept his eyes trained on the way her ass bounced every time he pushed forward hard enough.
Elain tried to catch her breath, completely overwhelmed, but he wasn’t having it. Lucien’s hand fell on her ass hard. It was a spank rather than one of the warning smacks he had been giving her since the start of the night, a punishment for her turning silent. He wouldn’t let her stop; Elain was his and he wanted to hear her repeat it until they were both falling apart.
The whimpered words got to him fast, and he groaned as he pinned her lower back to the mattress to stop her body from moving forward when he thrust into her. Lucien could feel her wetness dripping on his cock and falling onto the bed, and knowing he did that to her only made him want to fuck her harder.
The feeling was heavenly, but it made focusing close to impossible for Elain. Breathing was harder than it should be, the breaths leaving her lungs faster than they should because she couldn’t help the moans and gasps she let out. Lucien refused to even let her take a short break, his hand lifting and falling down on her ass immediately if she stopped talking.
“Say it!” Lucien growled, the moment absolutely perfect when she cried out.
“I’m yours,” Elain shut her eyes tightly, bunching the fabric of the bedsheets in her hands and twisting because she had nothing else to hold onto. Tears steadily streamed down her cheeks, please and pain mixed together until she couldn’t recognize which was which.
Elain moaned the words repeatedly for as long as she could, but her whole ass still turned an angry red from the spanks Lucien alternated on both cheeks every time she stopped talking. It got harder and harder for her as her high approached, Lucien’s order resonating through the room along with her cries.
“Again.” The sound of the spank was followed by a sharp sting and Elain yelped, following with the words he wanted to hear, repeated like a mantra.
Heat was building up in her lower stomach, threatening to release soon. Lucien’s weight was pressing into her lower back when one hand was resting, and he quickly brought the other one to the back of her neck. Elain was pinned to the mattress, tears making her vision blurry while her pussy squeezed his cock.
She came with a litany of slurred words and whimpers, choked breaths escaping her lungs.
“That’s my good girl,” Lucien lost himself in her, hips snapping forward. “So fucking tight,” he had to close his eyes through a grunt, seconds away from exploding.
“Yours,” Elain whispered, cheeks wet with tears while her eyes rolled back in her head from how sensitive she was becoming.
Lucien’s moans filled the room as he followed and came inside of her, pulling out a second later and thrusting into his hand to let the rest of his cum cover her ass. Groans and pants fell from his mouth as he dragged it out, making sure every last drop fell onto her skin and admiring how pretty the contrast was on her red ass. No sight was more satisfying than his cum covering Elain’s ass and dripping out of her pussy, her body slumped into the mattress because she was too spent to even move.
“Such a good girl,” Lucien breathed out, the tips of his fingers tracing down her spine soothingly.
Elain whimpered and shifted her hips, trying to shy away from his touch because she couldn’t take more.
“Shh, I got you baby,” he shuffled to her side and placed a sweet kiss on her cheek. Lucien wiped the tears off her face carefully, crouched by the bed before he decided it was time to clean her up. He pulled underwear up his legs as he went into the bathroom to find something to clean her with.
“Lucien,” she mumbled when he came back, lifting a hand to reach for him.
“I’m here love,” he crouched by her side, caressing her cheek with a soft smile.
“I want cuddles,” Elain’s words were a little slurred and her eyes were still glossy, but what made him melt was the pout on her lips.
“I’m going to give you cuddles in a second,” Lucien promised and held her hand as he brought the damp towel to her skin and slowly wiped his cum off her ass.
Elain squeezed his hand and bit her lower lip, trying not to whimper as he rubbed the irritated skin. Lucien whispered soothing words but kept going, making sure she was clean before moving on to her inner thighs.
He gave her time to recover as he sat next to her, playing with her hair while she gathered herself onto her side and stretched a little.
“Come one,” Lucien tugged on her hand to guide her up, but Elain shook her head.
“I can’t sit,” she whispered, looking up at him.
Guilt flooded through him for hurting her, and he had to remind himself several times that she wanted him to be rough and enjoyed it. As much as he liked playing with Elain, watching her sore afterwards always made him feel bad.
She slid off the bed still on her stomach and pushed on her arms to get up, a little wobbly despite Lucien’s hand steadying her. He opened his mouth to ask if she needed help to get to the bathroom, but Elain had already let go and walked over there before he had a chance to speak.
Lucien smiled to himself as he got comfortable on the bed, a bottle of body lotion sitting on the bedside table because he wasn’t done taking care of her just yet. He let his head rest on his pillow, on his back because he knew there would be no spooning tonight. Elain would want to stay on her stomach.
She crawled over him the second she saw him, her cheek resting on his chest while she threw an arm around his torso.
“Are you alright, El?” Lucien brushed her hair back, earning a hum from her before she kissed over his heart. “I’m just going to put lotion on your skin, alright?” He told her as he reached for the bottle and poured some into his palm.
Lucien wanted until she whispered her answer before bringing it to her abused skin, careful not to apply pressure. He rubbed as gently as he could, listening to her breathing carefully to check that it didn’t hurt too much, but she remained calm against him. Elain’s fingers danced against the skin of his chest, tracing small circles while she waited for him to be done.
Elain’s feet were getting cold with her whole body bare, but it didn’t take much longer for Lucien to bring the covers up to her neck. She smiled as she adjusted herself, comforted by the weight of his hand resting on her lower back.
“I love you,” he told her as he closed his eyes, slowly letting himself drift off to sleep.
“I love you more,” Elain whispered so low he barely heard it, but the little tap of his fingers on her back told her he’d argue with her about it in the morning.
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Tags:  @dealfea @chosenfamily-valkyriequeens  @shisingh @ruthieluvsbooks  @a_little_disguised @earthofemily @halaberdara @sydney-fae25 @meher_sumedha
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libraryofbaxobab · 7 months
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September 24, 2023:
This cross between The Wasp Factory and American Psycho may have appealed to me more when I was a teenager, but I'm not convinced. It certainly doesn't now. I kept waiting for the point to show up. This was written for kids whose entire personality is Hello Kitty with a knife. Full Hot Topic-ass, "tee hee I'm so pretty and psycho and antisocial tee hee I like the color pink and being a Disney Pwincess and stabbing peoples' eyeballs tee hee I'm so yandere" mode. I didn't think we still did this kind of shit. I get the feeling that the author is the *~edgy~* one in their friend group because they've read Lolita twice and know how to go on the "Dark Web." There are some interesting points in here, don't get me wrong. The ideas about female characters being defined by their backstory, and that their actions--even evil ones--always have to be justified are something fun for my brain to chew on. I also really liked the bit about her egg fetish. It was the only part of the character that seemed... honest. One shining drop of vulnerability in a sea of over-the-top goth posturing masquerading as authenticity. I won't complain that the protagonist sucks as a person, because that's literally the only reason to read the book. Unlikeable doesn't begin to cover it, but you know that going in. I just didn't see a motivation for most of her actions. It just seems like a regular Hockey Player Romance splattered with a random list of serial killer shit for edgy teens to put on their blogs to look cool, behind a Junji Ito-esque cover to catch attention.
I can't even say I'm disappointed, because this is exactly what I was afraid of going in. What I feel is more along the lines of embarrassment and disdain.
2/10 #WhatsKenyaReading
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Hello again :D its me that one anon who complained about hockey bros in his class and then vanished for ages haha. I have returned after finding your blog again and I?m glad to see it :D You are by far my favorite part of the hetalia fandom and whenever I end up falling back in I always think of your stuff first. Hope life's been treating you well my friend, all the best!!
THANK YOU! I'm flattered. And you too. <3 may life be good.
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wickedjack81 · 2 years
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Me
So I am on Tumblr trying it out. I am a pop culture junkie from Edmonton, in my 40s. So my posts are mostly going to be on that. Either Edmonton or Pop Culture mostly comics, television, music and movies. Also big into ball hockey so you’ll hear me complain about that! Also into politics definitely right center but just wish common sense was used more. Real reason I am here though is for promoting my blog. Check it out it is about the same shit I just mentioned! Love to hear from Edmonton peeps or writing community 
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15 People 15 Questions
thanks @giveemgreef for the tag!!
are you named after anyone?
not to my knowledge. fletcher is the name my folks always said they would have given me "if i'd been born a boy" so i guess im named after myself. lol.
2. when was the last time you cried?
three weeks ago in the walk-in freezer at work. next!
3. do you have kids?
never have never will
4. what sports do you play/have you played?
i was on my high school's fencing team for one year and i did noncompetitive japanese longbow archery (kyudo) for two until i took an arrow to the knee irreparably fucked my right shoulder in a car accident
5. do you use sarcasm?
(sarcastically) nooooooo never
6. what's the first thing you notice about people?
honestly im just not that observant of a person
7. what's your eye color?
gray. i had a bf once who claimed they changed color like a fucking anime character but this is unconfirmed by people who weren't trying to get in my pants at the time
8. scary movies or happy endings?
this is a weird dichotomy. who's to say that scary movies don't have happy endings. one of these is a trope and the other is a genre so it's not so much comparing apples to oranges as apples to the entire concept of vegetables. anyway you know what's a good movie? bones and all. really liked that one. next!
9. any talents?
i can count pills really fast (this is my job. it's not impressive.)
10. where were you born?
[SUBURB OF MINNEAPOLIS REDACTED]
11. what are your hobbies?
writing. blogging. complaining.
12. do you have any pets?
two cats, vanya and akko. they're sisters. akko is round and vaguely puck-shaped. vanya likes to swat at the tv when i watch hockey.
13. how tall are you?
driver's license says 5'7"
14. favorite subject in school?
in high school: japanese. in college: bio
15. dream job?
fabulously wealthy lottery winner/philanthropist. more seriously: dear god please just get me out of retail
i think literally everyone i know on this blog has been tagged in this already so. do it if you want to!
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dziedznuts · 10 months
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uh intro ig??
you can call me maggie or maggs, whichever one you prefer :)
i use she/her pronouns!
i am quite literally brand new to tumblr and i have no clue what i'm doing
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Basic Info n Boundaries!
i'm 18 yrs old and i'm bisexual
i’m a cis woman but i really couldn't care less about gender/pronouns/terms/whatever
my dm's are open if you wanna chat, just don't be creepy please n thanks!!
my ask is also open!! pls talk to me i prommy i don't bite
honestly just don't be weird or creepy. also no political or discourse heavy ppl please, but other than that i'm probably chill with you :))
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Interests!!
i have a lot of interests that i will never stfu about so very very sorry if you came here for anything in specific but my main interests are:
youtubers/streamers/content creators? (jschlatt, jack manifold, scott the woz, etc etc)
music! my favorite bands/artists are: Arctic Monkeys, TV Girl, Foo Fighters, Los Campesinos!, Glass Animals, and more!!
video games (especially nintendo games omg i love nintendo so much fdjkfdjfskl)
sports but ESPECIALLY hockey (let’s go red wings!!)
books n reading
D&D
crochet and crafting!
under the cut: other info and tagging system :)
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Other Info!
i'm always open to talk to ppl, especially about shared interests!!
i tend to use gendered terms (i.e. girl, dude, bro, babygirl, etc.) pretty gender-neutrally. please let me know if i call u something that you are uncomfy with!!
i don't use sideblogs or anything, so this blog will be very random and unorganized and will probably change over time as my interests change :))
uh yeah i think that's it!!
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Tagging System
Personal Tags:
#dziedz thoughts - literally just... random posts that don't really connect to anything el oh el
#dziedz irl - posts about my irl life, venting or sharing or just showing cool pictures i take :)
#dziedz liveblogs - self explanatory hahah
#dziedz jamz - music + vinyl collecting posts
#fluffernutter! - pictures of my lovely cat, fluffy :3
#dz's digital hugs - positive/mental health focused posts :)
Gaming Tags:
#dziedzcraft - posts about minecraft
#nintendziedz - posts about nintendo games (usually mario or pokemon heheh)
Other Tags:
#dndziedz - d&d posts
#dz’s theatre - posts about theatre… mostly me complaining about being a stage manager el oh el
#dziedz wings - hockey posting
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leafsbabe · 1 year
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Congrats on hitting 1k notes on one of your fics! I know that it's another fandom and not on here, and that may make your hockey writing seem more undesirable to write but it's all about the audience! There are always going to be more readers when things aren't rpf, never mind sport rpf. So, 10 hockey notes are probably equal to like 1000 notes in a more popular fandom LOL
it’s a top gun: maverick fic so that’s pretty popular rn (omg imagine what would have happened a few months ago when it was like even more popular lol)
but also hockeyblr is just notoriously bad with notes and i’ve seen so many talented people leave because they just didn’t get any engagement and i’ve always said i wouldn’t do that and stick around but that doesn’t mean i can’t voice my grievances... i’ve been keeping track of all my notes this year in a neat lil spreadsheet and damn it is so disparaging when i have several thousand followers and get like 6 likes 
but i could make a blank blog, write two sentences about a popular character, and get hundreds of notes... which i also did btw... like seperately from the top gun fic, i don’t spend much time on that blog though because it’s only a lukewarm interest of mine and the notes just aren’t hitting as hard as the hockeyblr notes would...
and i know i sound extremely entitled complaining about notes because i have a bigger following than some others but idk... if it wasn’t 11pm and raining rn i’d go outside and touch some grass... maybe even lay down on it because i don’t think just touching it would fix me
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Happy Oh-My-God-Everywhere-I-Look-On-The-Internet-Is-People-Posting-About-Their-Moms-My-Mom-Is-So-Mad-I-Haven’t-Posted-Even-Though-I-Don’t-Post-That-Much-And-We-Hate-Each-Other-Why-Do-I-Feel-Guilty-Ugh Day to all who celebrate
#not hockey#not to complain on my hockey blog#but my sister follows me everywhere else and she's the reason#well... shes not the reason but my mom loves her and not me#so its not her fault but it is like one of the main reasons i have a shitty relationship with my mom#but just seeing everyone elses post#and wanting to be like#happy mothers day mom#thanks for always body shaming me#you are the reason i hate myself#also the only person who had blantantly told me i dont have control over my own body and shes allowed to do whatever she wants with me#when i asked her to stop touching me one time#thanks for making sure ill never feel as worth while as my sister#even though she is a hot mess express and i am arguably doing better than her#but shes the skinny one with the college degree so anything i acomplish will never measure ip#thanks for barely congrautlating me on my promotion before asking me what my sister wants her to do with her mail#thanks for turning every conversation i ever try to have with you into talking about my sister#because its not like sometimes i need life advice or even just like normal comforting from my mom??#but god forbid we talk about something other than my sister for more than 3 minutes because my life is so irrelevant to your interests#thanks for telling me that the people i cared about growing up didnt care about me and making me straight up suicidal in middle school#thanks for more issues than vogue because you didnt have an abortion when you really should have#anyway long tags sorry to rant#this is just literally one of my least favorite days of the year#and all it does is remind me of all this and more#while somehow also making me feel like shit that i dont blubber all over social media about how much i love my mommy shes my best friend#like everyone else#even though she was arguably pretty pyschological abusive my entire life and ill have problem until the day i die because of her#and these fuckin bags under my eyes which is pure genetics#thanks a lot mom#anyway again if you guys are in the same boat then stick it out friends
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darkangel0410 · 4 years
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Listen, I'm never going to tell people what to do, but if you dislike the Blackhawks I'm not sure why you're following me tbh
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cornsobsessions · 2 years
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the internal conflict of wanting to post about current hockey news but also wanting to keep my blog a positive space where we just vibe
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