#not to get any sort of representative sample but just to get an idea of what some of the answers might be
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Han Jisung x Idol!Reader
Genre: Suggestive, Fluff, Angust
Warnings: None (I know of, if there are any please let me know)
Word Count: 9569
Masterlist
You are a part of a 6 member girl group (CELESTE) under JYP
The group has a sort of ethereal almost mythological vibe
Each member represents, a mythical creature
The group had two previous comebacks before this theme
Mihi (lead dancer and sun vocals): fairy
The closest to the two previous comebacks
glitter purples pinks
art deco inspired, ordinary objects are pretty and ornate
Flowers, petals, some wind motifs as well
Hee-young(main vocalist, visual, makne):angel
sky heaven themes
Has a massive pair of wings in the MV
Gold, light blue
Wind motifs feathers
Yuri (main dancer, main vocals and sub rapper): elf
Also, elegant but there are glimpses of something darker
tree themes (think Galadriel LOTR)
Foresty, vines, some crystals mostly opal diamond selenite moonstone and white howlite
honestly, Lord of the Rings stylez
Aera (lead vocalist, visual): nymph
floral themes, water lilies, some more water themes
Perhaps suggest a sort of rusalka vibes (not explicit, just some sort of implication the nymph may be a vengeful spirit???)
The darker parts are more obvious but with a brighter colour palette that acts as a kind of misdirect
(Sugar Rush TXT vibes)
Y/N (main rapper, main vocals and sub dancer): vampire
The dark parts are now on full display, and fully embraced
deep red blues greens
Lace, silver
gothic with a splash of grunge
Title track has scream’s (dreamcatcher) styling with the lacy dress parts not the magic in the MV lol with a cross between Odd Eye and Nxde (with it’s sampling of classical music)
B side track is the one you got to go crazy on. It’s full rock/ metal think I Miss the Misery by Halestorm with Odd Eye’s styling)
Nam-Gli (leader and lead rapper): witch
The dark parts continue with as much elegance, but there’s a certain finality to it
dark purples, black, gold, and silver
Misty, foresty but a darker green to Yuri similar to Odd Eye MV
(As an aside: the birth order is Nam-Gli, Y/N, Aera, Mihi, Yuri, Hee-young)
Each comeback is based on one of the mythical creatures of one of the members
The group is very popular, but because comebacks are rarer than for most k-groups not massively successful
A lot goes into giving the perfect vibe, a lot of you do brand deals and modeling on the side. Aera has two dramas under her belt
You, Yuri and Nam-Gli have your own lil side trio, with you and Yuri being a duo when Nam-Gli is busy. y’all cover your favorite songs usually by other trios
The three of you had covered 3RACHA songs several times and the fans loved it
The three of you settled on the members that complemented your rapping styles with Nam-gli usually covering Han’s lines Yuri Changbin’s and you Bang Chan’s
The fans absolutely adored your little trios 3RACHA covers so JYP had the grand idea of getting your groups together and you started doing more activities with them
It started off slowly, with the label testing the waters
At first it was just your trio and 3RACHA doing a lyric challenge of sorts where they would have to rap the next line of yours and your group members verses while you would have to do the same with 3RACHA songs
The atmosphere was really nice and to your surprise you seemed to bounce off Jisung the most
You didn’t really think much of it at the time, the company probably wanted to strike while the iron was hot and get both groups some more promotion
You didn’t really think you’d see any of Stray Kids again
The company, however, had other ideas. After the fan response they knew they struck gold and quickly set up more activities for both groups
Despite initially being shocked to see Stray Kids again you found yourself natural drifting towards Jisung in the group interactions
Really quickly it was easy to see you and Jisung had wonderful chemistry in the group shows and so you ended up doing separate vlives just the two of you
The very first one started off a bit strange, the two of you had no idea what to say to each other when it was just the two of you. During group activities, the two of you would sit next to each other either piling on top of one another in fits of laughter when another member said something you found funny; defending something either of you said that you agreed on, or playfully arguing whenever you inevitably disagreed
One time, both groups were asked if a sauna was burning, what would you rather cover your private parts or your face. You and Jisung collapsed in on each other when Seungmin said the question was probably which would you protect from burning
In short, you could always rely on other members to say something for the two of you to react to
You both awkwardly asked how your morning was at the same time before bursting out with laughter, slightly diffusing the tension. While the rest of the live was slightly awkward, the initial icebreaker allowed you to joke with each other a little more
From then on, the lives usually consisted of you guys catching up with each other, Jisung excitedly telling you about his busy days while you filled him in on yours
The lives had different vibes depending on where they took place, if it was in the Stray Kids dorm the lives were far more chaotic; one day he threw a pillow at you. You glared at him, beckoning with your finger for him to come over. He looked terrified, and you struggled to keep your grin in. You subtly grasped the pillow he threw at you in your hand and hit him with all your strength, starting a pillow fight which, much to your chagrin, Jisung ended up winning
He would always do mildly annoying things to get a rise out of you, but you dealt with it with a Stoic patience, only occasionally giving in. Every live always ended in laughter
You would often stay round afterward as both of you had a break, he was remarkably chill when the cameras weren’t on him, it was difficult to get used to but refreshing
After a few hours of being high energy, you were both tired, so you’d either put on a movie or scroll through your phones, showing each other memes and catching each other up on things you couldn’t say on camera
You told him about all the comebacks for Celeste. He asked more about the groups' concept in general, and you happily explained how with each comeback a certain member is focused on as it’s their theme. Celeste's last comeback was fairy themed, so Mihi was featured the most, and she had more freedom to implement her vision. You joked that for this comeback, she became the group's pseudo leader
Jisung quickly asked when your theme would come up.
You said not for a while, as the company wants the group to establish themselves with more feminine themes first. You said Yuri’s was next, and you were still super excited by it. The concept she talked you through sounded amazing
“What concept have you got?” Jisung quickly asked. He was leaning towards you on the couch, and he’d put his phone down, listening intently
You were extremely taken aback, you’d talked at length about it with your group, seeing if they were okay with all your ideas, and they were annoyingly accommodating it made you want to cry a little.
They’d suggest ways to make your vision come true without compromising it in any way. They said it was because you did the exact same thing with their ideas. It made them really happy, and they wanted to make you happy as well
You shyly started with the mythological creature your theme was about and Jisung’s eyes went wide, “Vampire?! That’s so cool!!”
This boosted your confidence a little and you told him everything. How you wanted it to be inspired by classic vampire literature with a modern rock twist. You listed your inspirations from Dracula and Carmila to Halestorm’s music. You said you wanted the music video set to be in a gothic revival house (you didn’t mind if it was a replica or green screen as long as it fit the vibe) like Strawberry Hill in London. You realized that the rock vibe probably won’t be accepted by the higher ups, but you were sure as hell gonna try
Jisung looked at you in awe, you were amazing already, but even more so when you talked about your project. The determination in your eyes made him smile
Lives in your groups' dorm were a lot more chilled out, both of you having chill conversations perhaps scrolling through your phones if there was a lull in activity on the vlive but mostly responding to comments made by fans
This is where the fans really got to see a different side to the both of you. Often you would be working on something while Jisung read out the comments. You stop what you were doing and join in the conversation. Then you would switch, Jisung would put in an ear bud and work on his music while you carried the conversation
Occasionally you would set out vlives where people could just work with the two of you, usually when you had deadlines coming up
In the vlives at your dorm you would always be draped over each other in some way, just general keeping physical contact
For some reason after these vlives Jisung was full of energy and would end up causing a raucous, the two of you had a makeshift lightsaber fight, and you enjoyed it so much the two of you impulsive brought lightsaber replicas after
When yours arrived, you raced over to the Stray Kids dorm ready to challenge Jisung, you burst through his door activating your white lightsaber, but your eyes went wide when you noticed he was in the middle of a live
You blinked a couple times trying to hold back a laugh, “I’m so sorry, I’ll wait” you left the room with your lightsaber making whooshing noises as you left the room and closed the door
You could hear Jisung burst out laughing as Minho passed you, saying “told you so”
You quickly checked the vlive to make sure the fans weren’t mad that you interpreted, thankfully only a small handful said what you did was really disrespectful, while most were clearly enjoying themselves. There were lots of laughing emojis, with loads asking if it was a lightsaber
Jisung replied smiling saying how after your last vlive together you impulse brought yourselves lightsabers, “mine actually came today” he enthused and took out a purple lightsaber
You laughed as he swooshed it around, hearing the replica make the noise
Your cheeks heated up when all the comments started saying “lmao y/n’s a massive nerd’ Jisung laughed on your phone screen nodding his head
His eyes seemed to light up as he talked about how much you loved Star Wars and how you knew so many historical facts and how much you knew about architecture
Your stomach pleasantly twisted, causing a shiver to run up your spine
You saw Jisung sign off and quickly pocketed your phone, but not before you saw a comment teasingly saying he ‘shouldn’t keep his girlfriend waiting’
You hopped Jisung didn't glimpse that one, you knew he’d overthink your friendship and might stop acting in the same way he did
Besides, you didn’t need him overthinking at the same time as you were
He swung the door open and stared at you, expression unreadable. He took his lightsaber from behind his back and activated it, the purple glow lightly illuminated his upper body
You activated yours, and you dueled each other throughout the dorm before collapsing on the sofa and watching a movie like usual
A couple of days later, your two groups had to complete a series of challenges pulled from a challenge pile, you read yours out loud “challenge someone on the opposite team to a lightsaber duel”
You and Jisung burst out laughing, confusing both of your band members
You fell first. On a separate vlive someone asked how you’d managed to find such a good friend in Jisung, you look at the comment a little shocked, you didn’t know how to answer
Of course the content your groups make was thought of by the company for further promotion and without that you doubt you would have ever met Jisung
You tell the truth: you’re not sure, “but he always takes care of me. He always checks if I’ve eaten and checks in to see how I’m feeling, and I return the gesture in kind.” He’s always drinking energy drinks, and you’ve been trying to get him to cut back at least a little. “You’ve all seen the vlives I’m sure, and it thinks it’s really easy to tell that we’ve got a good rapport with each other and I think we’re gonna be good friends for a really long time”
Your heart clenches when you say friend, and you realise you want something more than just friendship
Jisung takes longer to come to terms with his feelings but where you lacked in action on your end he did not hesitate to initiate
Every time someone asks about you on one of his vlives his eyes light up as he compliments you to no end “she’s so nice, she always checks in on me, makes sure I’ve eaten. Oh! She’s trying to get me to cut back on energy drinks because the caffeine is bad for you and I drink way too much.” He’ll then go on to talk about your stage presence and how it absolutely mesmerises him and how you were the first member that caught his eye when your group debuted even though the fairy theme is the complete opposite of yours, you killed it
It takes relentless teasing from his band mates before he realises his feelings for you
He walks in after one of his vlives and his band mates are all talking about the will they won’t, they between the two do you
When they mention it to Jisung he obviously denies it saying he’d know if he had feelings for you, and he doesn’t, you’re just friends
Minho looks at him incredulously and pulls out an edit he saw of the two of you made by, clearly a very dedicated fan, “you look at her like you’d look at a girlfriend, and you say you don’t have feelings for her” he scoffs. “I do not look at her like that, and I do not have feelings for her. Can we drop this?”
That same night, he can’t help but reach for his phone and search your names on TikTok
The more edits he watches, the more he notices how he’s staring at you. His eyes really do betray him, and he remembered back to his vlive how his heart pounded when he talked about you and how he couldn’t stop smiling
He’d fallen hard
And just in time for your theme to be the centre of your group’s comeback
You kept it from Jisung because you wanted it to be a surprise you knew how excited he was for your theme to come up and every time he said it you willed your heart not to explode
Loads of your friends were excited, Jisung was no different, you told yourself
The comeback was steeped in deep blues, rich reds and engulfing greens, silver necklaces and black lace. The music’s tone was darker, like something watching from the shadows; it sent a chill down his spine as he watched the MV
You sampled a lot more classical music as well as used more classical instruments (violin especially) to give a more gothic feel to the comeback, all somehow perfectly intertwined with some fully rock songs.
At the very end, you let out a splendidly sultry laugh, showing off the fangs made especially for the comeback. If you had to be honest you kinda liked them, probably too much
JYP decided it would be good publicity for both groups to have Stray Kids react to your group’s most recent comeback, especially as the two groups were still close despite your groups popularity rising and thus having less activities together
There were lots of shocked expressions and ‘whoas’ coming from the group in general. They were used to the bright colour palettes and upbeat feelings of your group's songs
Despite there being a lot of posing and standing, the boys found it endlessly compelling, there were bursts of quick movement where the screen would go blank, and you would end up in a different place on the screen
Similarly, there would be a blur of motion followed by one of the members changing their position in the room
Jisung watched intently whenever, you showed up on screen of the title track’s MV, by the end he was brimming with pride knowing you were the main driving force behind the comeback
He watched you fully sink into the role, more than he’d ever seen you do before, you embodied the vampires of legend, you were dangerous but endlessly enticing
While most of the scenes took place on a set that resembled and old mediaeval castle, the choreography scenes were set inside a hall clearly inspired by Strawberry Hill
Chan, mostly impressed with the composition of the song, asked who’s theme the comeback was, before someone from behind the camera could answer Jisung beamed and yelled “Y/N’s it was Y/N’s.”
When the group looked at him questioningly, he said you had told him everything about your vision, he just had no idea it was coming up next. You must have kept it from him as a surprise
The group talked more about what they thought was really good about the comeback’s title track, from the lyrics to the set design
Next, they showed the boys the album’s B-side track; even Jisung, knowing everything he did, was utterly shocked. Like you mentioned, he didn’t think the company would allow you to do a fully rock song
The lyrics seemed to hit really close to home, the song expressed the frustration in knowing your feelings for someone but not being able to do anything about it, having to hold back every time they’re around you. Not allowing yourself to give in and the hurt that carried with that
Not to mention, the visuals were heartbreakingly beautiful, seeing you laying in a forest with a—very familiar to him—band hoodie and ripped bell bottom jeans just staring at the sky made him feel things!
All he could do was stare at the screen watching the credits roll by, and he kept noticing your name a lot more than in the title track
Everyone was in awe and thought they’d seen it all
The video ended with the whole of Stray Kids wishing your group the best of luck throughout your promotion and that they’ll see your group at your comeback stage
Needless to say it was an absolute hit, within the first couple hours there were already thousands views on the title track’s MV with the number was steadily growing
You and your group prepared frantically for the comeback backstage. Everyone was rushing about getting makeup and any clothing alterations done
Yuri rushed over to you to make sure you were okay, judging from your expression you were very anxious, “hey, what are you worried about?” she asked
You were taken slightly aback that she was able to tell, but realistically, who wouldn’t. It was very clear you had been a ball of stress ever since before the comeback was even released. “I don’t know, just-what if it all goes horribly wrong? It’s on me, I suggested the concept. I picked all the outfits, set the staging, sure the video has enough views, but they’re a meaningless metric of popularity for the company. If they don’t receive a high profit from album sales and promotions, that’s it. It’s the end-”
You continued rambling until Yuri interrupted you, “you were not the only one, if the company saw something they knew wouldn’t work they wouldn’t have let it happen. Besides, this comeback was awesome! I, for one, loved every second. I don’t think that’s the only reason you're nervous. I think it has something to do with a certain boy group member you often hang out with and his opinion”
You gave her a warning glance, taking a deep breath. Yuri just patted you on the back and let you finish getting ready
Jisung watched the entire comeback stage in awe, his expectations were utterly blown away, you looked stunning in your outfit and the looks you gave on stage were perfect
You brilliantly embodied the essence of enticing but deadly on screen and stage
The red skirt opened and closed around your thighs with every movement, contrasting with the tucked in baggy band T-shirt, that was also in the B-side music video. He smiled, you thought of every detail
God, he wanted to kiss you so bad
With the very last beat of the stage, fake blood was poured all over you and staying in character you smirked at the camera running your tongue over your teeth as you grinned bringing attention to the fangs you’d worn for the performance
You got a small break where you promote the album more, telling them there were more performances still to go
You did all that without paying any attention to the blood still dripping down your face, seeping into your clothes and Jisung couldn’t keep the image of you grinning as blood dripped down your face out of his head
you took one last gulp of water and set yourself in position for the B-Side track performance
It was just as high energy as the title track but with more intricate group movements usually surrounding you singing your lungs out in the middle
At the end you all bowed and one of the staff came out in stage whispering in your ear and ushering you off stage
Everyone was confused until Nam-Gli clarified the staff wanted you to get changed because the dripping blood was a bit of a safety hazard, all while avoiding several pools of fake blood on the floor
The audience and group laughed at the side steps, but thankfully staff came out with mops cleaning the blood patches
As they’d finished you ran back on stage and Jisung nearly choked, there was no way you could have looked more stunning on your big day yet here you were. Pulling out surprise after surprise
The entire outfit was skin tight, a stark contrast from the previous look, under the black jacket's front buckles was a black bustier top that slotted inside the hem of the leather chained and pleated skirt
Jisung was relieved to see you kept the thigh highs, he’d never admit it, but they were his favourite part of the ensemble
The stage continued with renditions of previous songs as well as a rehash of the title and B-Side until, tired and ready for bed, your group bid everyone goodbye leaving the stage
Turns out Stray Kids left early because they were all stood backstage waiting to congratulate you all
Jisung launched himself at you as soon as he saw you, enveloping you and in a tight hug. He breathed in your scent as he buried his face in your neck and refused to let go, until Chan cleared his throat at which point you separated
After several congratulations and cheers, the conversations started separating off
You stood next to Jisung with Changbin and Yuri, all of you conversing about the coming days both for your group and Stray Kids
You barely paid attention to their words, hyper focused on how close your hand was to the Jisung’s, you could feel the heat radiating off it
One tiny shift and your pinkies would be intertwined, another small shift, and you’d comfortably fold your hand into his
Your hand twitched a little at the thought, so desperate to follow through on your desires but ultimately stopping short
You couldn’t do it, you made up excuses for yourself, he hasn’t given any clear indication he likes you, the dreaded dating ban. Not that you followed all the rules, but this one was just too convenient
When you left your daze Jisung was staring at you and once you made eye contact he reached for your hand folding it into his own
Your heart jumped, did this mean what you thought it meant ?
“Can I speak to you?” you saw a small flash of pink dust his cheeks, “privately”
Your heart lurched again as you nodded, not breaking eye contact
He dragged you into a dressing room and stood in front of you, this time holding both your hands
“I wanted to take a moment to congratulate you, personally. You were amazing. I mean, I couldn’t take my eyes off you. You were mesmerising,” he grinned, and you smiled back, your heart swelling with each word.
“I’m so proud of all you’ve accomplished already, and it’s only the beginning”
Meanwhile, the group were placing bets as to why Jisung pulled you into another room, he wasn’t exactly subtle
“They’re definitely gonna bone?” Minho deadpanned
“Ew gross, they’re not gonna do that”, exclaimed Mihi
“No I agree, Jisung’s too much of a chicken, probably hasn’t even kissed her,” Changbin teased
Felix then chimed in, “it’s weird he’d go for Y/N. I was always under the impression Nam-Gli would be more his type”
“Please,” she dismissed Felix’s claim, “I want someone who can take care of me, I’ve already got my hand full raising these four”
“What about Y/N?” Chan frowned
“She’s an equally stressed parent” Nam-Gil smiled and the group laughed
Back in the dressing room, Jisung continued, “I can’t wait to see my best friend grow and become even more famous!”
Wuhoh, ‘best friend’ your brain wouldn’t stop repeating the word, it packed onto it and refused to let go
Jisung regretted it as soon as he said it, it felt so wrong, it made his stomach churn
You managed a weak smile and replied, “thank you so much,” you slipped your hands from Jisung’s warm hold, “we should probably head back and all go home. It’s late, I don’t want the girls to think I’m doing anything weird”
“Oh yes, totally, this was just a casual conversation between best friends,” Jisung really couldn’t stop himself. He had no idea what else to say, my crush? A conversation between two people who could possibly grow to have a long and beautiful relationship? Maybe start a family that spans a generation, with each child being more successful than the previous?
At least ‘best friend’ wouldn’t freak her out as much he thought
‘Best friend’ that infernal title was stuck with you all the way to your bed, nagging you and telling you we're stupidly misinterpreting the signals. He was just being friendly
Soon you fell into a flat dreamless sleep
When Jisung got back instead of sleeping, he looked up his and your name again. On TikTok, YouTube, everything. He found several edits that made him smile a little
Twitter, however, made him blush the most, it was filled with playful ‘wish he looked at me like that’ followed by screenshots of his staring at you in joint lives
Others were from the video filmed of his group's reactions to your comeback. The tweets talked about how absolutely whipped he looked for you, mostly with, ‘we all know who that look’s for ;)’ and ‘jiy/n dating when?’ comments
Part of him hoped you’d see these and know, he didn’t mean that he only wanted to be best friends but the other hopped to god you didn’t see them to save him the embarrassment
He fell asleep to an edit of the two of you with the classic sickly love song played in the background
You weren’t able to see Jisung as often as you had previously, the comeback schedule was gruelling, but perhaps it was for the better
At least not seeing him meant you didn’t have to hear ‘best friend’ emerge from his lips and painfully lodge itself inside your heart
Jisung, however, couldn’t help but feel upset. Every time he saw you his heart filled with a strange mix of pride and adoration with an insufferable anxiety because why were you only just texting him back it’s been an hour?
Your comeback schedule kept you too busy for Jisung’s liking. He understood, he really did, but after the so dubbed ‘best friend’ incident he was constantly on edge seeing you
Maybe ‘best friend’ did freak you out and your comeback was nothing but a perfectly convenient excuse to ignore him
You sat on a raised bench behind three of your bandmates in between the other two, there was no missing you
Each of one of you was given a pointer for your ‘most likely to’ game
You enjoyed some fun ones like, “who’s most likely to stack it on a night out?” “who would not realise they stayed up all night because they were too busy playing video games?” etc.
It was hilarious getting to know new things about your members you never would have before
When the next question got asked, you froze, ‘most likely to fall in love with someone from another group?’
Act natural you thought as everyone pointed at you
You tried to diffuse some of your nerves by delaying your point for comedic effect, the MC laughed, so it must have worked a little
“Me?” you mock gasped, “I would never!” all the members laughed, and you chuckled along with them
“Oh, are you sure?” Yuri teased, “it seems exactly like something you’d do”
“In all seriousness is it?” the MC asked
“I mean, if it happens, it happens” your heart skipped a beat thinking of one person in particular. “I’d like to say, I’m aware our group's dating ban isn’t over yet, so I wouldn’t do anything I’m not supposed to. Besides, feelings aren’t always reciprocated” you ended with a bittersweet smile
Feeling the tension you left in the air, you spoke up again, “unless of course your Yuri, who responds to so much fan mail she can barely keep up,” you smiled brightly
Yuri blushed to the backdrop of all the members laughing, “aww don’t be embarrassed, it’s cute” you smiled again, and she shyly smiled back with the rest of the members giving small chuckles at the interaction
Jisung had finally decided on something to occupy his time with.
He had been working on lyrics to a new song
The frustration that came with the “best friend” incident gave him a sick sort of inspiration, making him want to write his feelings into song
One song was about how one person can make you want to be the best version of yourself while the other, he imagined, as a sort of sister track to your comebacks b-side track
He quickly looked up from his notebook to his phone, still pinging with a notification
He picked it up immediately, hoping it was a text from you
Sadly it was just a YouTube notification for your group’s newest video
He was curious and couldn’t stop himself from clicking the notification and watching the video
He laughed a couple of times thinking how he would have probably picked the same members having known them for so long
All of a sudden, all the pointers are on you
The answer to the question sparked hope in Jisung, if you were most likely to get with someone from another group he could shoot his shot
Perhaps the “best friend” incident was long forgotten, but his heart wrenched when he heard your response
To him, it was clearly aimed and didn’t miss
As a result he decided to drop hints like Hansel and Gretel dropped crumbs in your next vlive hopping the trail would lead you to his true feelings
He started the live before you came in so the two of you could get right to it, and he could have your usual alone time with you quicker
You walked into his dorm room with heavy steps
You’d rushed over after recording the relay dance for the B-side track and were exhausted, but you really couldn’t miss this opportunity. You hadn’t properly interacted with fans in weeks
Jisung noticed immediately and asked if you were okay. You just tiredly looked at him and sat down with a lopsided smile that didn’t quite reach your eyes
You didn’t want to admit in front of fans that you were exhausted
Jisung noticed and did the first thing he could think of to distract the fans
“Where's my hug?” he pouted, and you looked at him confused
Jisung continued his half serious pout, “I really wanted a hug but since you won’t give me one I’ll have to take it!” he grinned and quickly wrapped you up tightly in his arms
“Jisung come on, let go,” you lightly chuckled
“Nope, I’m not letting go until you hug me back,” Jisung proudly stated
You rolled your eyes smiling and wrapped your arms around his neck burying your head in it, and he did the same
You breathed in his scent and whispered in his ear, “I feel a lot less tired now, thank you” then pulled away and smiled
“You happy now?” You teased out loud
Jisung’s heart beat so fast in his chest the rest of his body couldn’t seem to keep up, but he smiled nonetheless
He started at you and gave you a killer grin, “I’m always happy when you’re around”
It was your heart's turn to explode. You bit your lip and turned round to the screen seeing the comments full off, ‘ew guys get a room’ with Jisung quickly replying that they’re already in one making your eyes go wide
He then quickly and expertly changed the topic asking how everyone was and what they were up to, picking out and responding to the ones he managed to catch in the sea of comments
The live went by smoothly, and you noticed Jisung would bump your hand with his every so often almost like he wanted to take your hand, god you wanted him to take your hand
He pulled away to switch the song that he’d put it on in the background and carried on talking to the fans
You really tried to stay in the conversation, but you zoned out singing along to the music under your breath (imagining 2/14 by the band CAMINO)
Jisung noticed and smiled before joining in
You both fell into the rhythm of the music, vocals effortlessly moulding together into a beautiful concert
The fans adored it, with comments of ‘you guys should perform together!’
You smiled at each other and said that maybe one day you’d be able to get it organised
When the live ended, he grasped your hand, fulfilling your deepest want of the moment before leading you away to the sofa when he draped himself over you as soon as you sat down
“You sure you’re okay?” Jisung asked, “you looked absolutely exhausted.” He looked at you with care and sympathy. You replied that you were better now, just tired from filming
He, still draped over you on the sofa, tangled your legs together and asked you to tell him what you’d been up to
You indulged him relaying the events of the day
Jisung didn’t look away for a single moment, his eyes betrayed warmth as he inched closer to you
You drew out the last syllable of your sentence and went silent, looking into Jisung’s eyes
Your breath hitched, and your eyes were half closed as his face closed in on yours. “Ji,” you breathed, “what are you going?” you whispered smiling and glancing at his lips
“Call me that more,” he sighed, looking up from your lips to meet your eyes; a fire just behind his pupils
This was it, it was the moment you’d know Jisung didn’t mean the stupid friend comment, there’s no way you could be friends when all he wants to do is kiss you until you were out of breath
There’s no way he could only be friends with you when he wants to nip chains of bruises down your collarbone
There’s no way he could only be friends when he wanted you to rake your hands through his hair
Time slowed to a crawl, you were in a parallel universe where time didn’t move and the consequences of a kiss didn’t matter
A parallel universe with just the two of you, no company, no toxic fans, nothing that would get in the way of your affection for one another; where your connection wouldn’t be denied but accepted and encouraged
You focused on his lips, and you felt his searing breath on your lips
He was so close, you were impatient
Before you could launch yourself at him, you heard a sharp knock on the door
The two of you threw yourselves at opposite ends of the sofa as the voice that belong to the knock said “I’m coming in”
The door opens, revealing a mildly annoyed Minho “are you coming or did you forget?”
Jisung stared at him blankly, you could see the cogs moving in his brain, and he yelled apologies
He shot up from the couch, and you knew this was your cue to leave
You walked to the door but were stopped by Jisung who wrapped his arms around you and quickly whispered “I’ll see you soon”
Your lips were still blazing on the way back to your dorm
Your members were enjoying their free time by watching a new drama on Netflix as you walked through the door
You took off, your shoes and sat down next to Aera on the arm of the sofa
Everyone turned to face you and Nam-Gli asked, “So how was it?”
You gulped and yelled, “such a normal time!”
“Why are you being weird?” Yuri asked, eyeing you up suspiciously
“I’m not being weird, you're being weird,” you rapidly released the words
“Very chill response,” Yuri responded in a flat tone, “now tell us what happened”
“Me and Ji- we,” you took a deep breath, “we nearly kissed. Minho interrupted. Turns out he had to go to an event but forgot about it”
You looked away as they yelled in surprise
“What are you gonna do when you see him next? You guys have another vlive in about two weeks, don't you?” Mihi asked
“Honestly, I don’t think I can face him after this. What am I supposed to say? ‘Let's continue where we left off?’” you grimaced
“YES,” Yuri yelled, “just get together already! Do not use the dating ban excuse, I know for a fact you couldn't care less”
The two of you argued about the importance of the dating ban, with you trying to defend yourself because ‘it’s not just an excuse’
“Okay, we get it you disagree,” Nam-Gli quelled the fire. “How about you give yourself until your next vlive together to see him? That way you can put it out of your mind?”
You nodded, grateful for her intervention, you relaxed and continued watching the drama with the rest of the group
You woke up feeling refreshed until you remembered why you wanted sleep to refresh you
Your heart started racing, remembering the events of the last day, and you couldn’t help but smile
There was hope after all
Be quickly the hope turned to anxiety, the dating ban was still in effect and would be for another few weeks, and you promised fans you and Jisung would perform together
That meant weeks of working closely with him every day after the two of you nearly kissed
You took out the switch you’d saved up for a booted up Legend of Zelda, hoping it would distract you, and it worked for a couple of hours
You finally found one of Links missing memories and as the cut scene played it was strangely captivating
Usually you would have skipped over it, having played this game to completion several times already. But something about the way Zelda looked at Link was familiar
You couldn’t help it when you reached for the phone you had been religiously ignoring since waking up
You clicked on his contact, seeing only one unread message when you expected more: ‘how do you want to pitch a song cover to the company?’
You couldn’t decide if you were relieved or angry that he said nothing about yesterday’s incident
You ignored it for as long as your mind would allow you before you huffed and picked up your phone
You replied with a mostly generic response about how the fans really wanted it and it would give both of your groups exposure
The two of you texted back and forth until you had a plan of action and before long you decided to meet with the company in a couple days as Jisung already managed to set up a meeting with the execs somehow
Overall the conversation was painfully professional. Neither of you cracked any jokes or referenced your favourite shows. It was so unlike you
Despite all of this you still hoped, he set up the meeting way too quickly.
Of course there was the possibility he wanted this partnership over with as quickly as possible but there was no way that could be true. Not with the fire behind his eyes when he looked at you
Jisung waited impatiently in the building lobby for you to appear
You hadn’t brought up the nearly kiss at all and he was worried. Did you think he was weird? Maybe he should have waited and dropped more hints. Was he moving too fast?
He nerves stilled when you walked through the door, despite your smile being slightly awkward it made Jisung feel light
“So shall we?” you asked
It was a simple phrase that meant nothing but what was on the tin but it made Jisung soar, he hadn’t heard your voice in longer than you would like
The two of you talked to the executives who loved your idea
Jisung watched as you professionally presented all the benefits this collaboration would have and how this is something that the company would be able to carry on into the future
He wasn’t expecting you to say anything about the future especially after the last incident
As you wrapped up your pitch the execs asked what song the two of you wanted to cover, Jisung hadn’t even thought that far but it seems you had. Immediately with confidence you said ‘PING PONG’ by Hyuna and Dawn
He could feel heat crawl up his face but despite this he still nodded his head and smiled after seeing your own impossibly infectious grin
“Great the matter is settled, you guys can work on it in time for the next award show” one of the execs said with a grin
The next few weeks you and Jisung saw each other every day for at least and hour if not more
Both of you decided to work on learning the choreography first because at you listened to the song to learn the choreography you’d pick up the lyrics easily
As a result your joint lives were mostly updating fans on how the rehearsal process was going
Despite your worst fears the vlives weren’t as awkward as you pictured, the energy flowed between the two of you effortlessly
However, you noticed how where previously he’s have a hand on some part of you body be it you are or your knee, he now refused to have any part of him closer than would be considered disrespectful
You missed his warmth. You were upset because you could tell he was holding himself back
You could imagine why, but it’s not like you pulled away during the incident. In Fact you distinctly remember yourself moving closer, until Miho barged in
Between the bittersweet lives and standing nearly every spare moment practising with Jisung the award show hd rolled around quicker that you expected
For some reason you signed yourself and Jisung up to be the opening act for the award show and regretted it
It hit you that you were supposed to perform a song made for a performed by a couple
Just you and Jisung. Just you and the one person you wished desperately to be in a relationship with but couldn’t
It was all well and good casually running through all the moves in rehearsal but this was serious
You felt nervous as you thought about what the fans would say
Most would not doubt enjoy it but you couldn't help but focus on the ones who believed they owned the idols they admire
All of a sudden you were hyper aware of the dating ban that had ended only a couple days prior
If the two of you were too close it would not doubt cause a scandal
Your mind spiralled as you imagined the headlines calling you undignified, loose, easy
“Hey, you’re gonna do amazing,” were the words that stopped your spiral, they were soft and reassuring. You knew painfully well who they belonged to
You took a deep breath and looked Jisung in the eye and he smiled
It made you insides melt and you were certain he could see it on you face because his eyes darted to you lips for a split second
You recalled how close he was to kissing you in his dorm room and once again thought back to the dating ban
If it was finished surely there was no harm right?
“Yeah, we’re gonna smash this,” you smiled back. “We’ve rehearsed this song so much it might as well have been made for us to perform,” you joked begging no one noticed the implications of your statement
Jisung only hummed and his eyes looked to your lips once again, this time they stayed there for longer than they should have
You licked your lips gently, part of you wanting to make sure they were ready for Jisung to capture them after so long
The other knew it wouldn’t happen as you saw the PA approach to tell you you were on in less than three minutes
Just like in the original you started off the show, the train attached to the right side of your body suit swayed along with your body
You felt confident and full of energy until you felt Jisung’s hand trail all the way up your leg confidently brushing your ass
Thankfully you were facing away from the audience allowing you time to collect yourself
You knew this would be more intense than rehearsals but you didn’t expect Jisung to go this hard
It fired you up and you decided to give it your all as well
Jiung could feel the heat crawl up his face as you shake your ass dangerously close to his crotch
He couldn’t help but smirk as you bit your lip looking him directly in the eye as if to challenge him
He eagerly accepted and the while performance had a push and pull effect to it
The two of you goaded each other on stage testing the waters every time your faces got too close to be called innocent
The built up tension culminated in Jisung dipping you and you holding his face in you hand ready for him to bend don and kiss you as the song ended
The two of you stayed in that position with massive grins on your faces until you couldn’t hold it anymore and Jisung pulled you up and you buried you face i your neck as he laughed and waved at cheering crowd
Once you recovered your turned around and waved at them as well smiling widely
Jisungs hand never left your waist
The two of you left the stage and you shot like a bullet towards Yuri who was silently screaming and telling you how good you were
Chan came up to Jisung and clapped him on the back but Jsiung couldn’t keep his eyes off you
He knew this was the moment to tell you. He was sure you must have known but he still gave you your space
He couldn’t lie and say he was entirely confident, there was a part of him that was worried because you hadn’t made any moved
But he had to tell you
Jisung walked over to you still smiling and took you hand in his, “can I talk to you, privately?” you glanced at Yuri who nodded and gave you a knowing look
“Sure,” you replied, content with your hand in his. You could get used to this you thought
He lead you towards a dressing room and closed the door behind you
You basked in each others presence just looking at each other
“You really went for it didn’t you?” you questioned with a smile
“Sorry, was it too much?” Jisung answered taking several steps closer to you
“No,” you breathed out, “it was perfect.”
You stayed still for a moment and Jisung admired the grin on your face
The silence was comfortable and electric, calm and expectant
“I really hope I haven’t misinterpreted things but I really like you-”
You cut Jisung off before he could say more, “I know. I really like you too,” you trailed off
“But?” Jisung asked with a mixture of hurt and frustration. If you liked each other what could possibly be stopping you?
“But, I’m not sure we should do anything right now. My dating ban’s only just been lifted and I don’t want to make things more difficult for either of us” you explained
Jisung was ready to argue, he was ready to present every piece of evidence that supported the two of you dating but this wasn't one he had prepared for
Much to his dismay he couldn’t argue with you on that point
Whatever happened he knew, that he would come out unscathed but you on the other hand. Well it would be a lot harder for you
His mouth opened and closed as you apologised before leaving him in the room alone with his thoughts
You gulped and went to perform your groups stage, you put on a show for the cameras and tried not to betray heartache in your eyes
Jisung did the same he finished his group’s stage and after neither of your groups won this particular award he went home disappointed
The rest of the members were getting slightly worried for him, exchanging glances
Minho ended up sitting down next to him on the sofa of their dorm
“I’m guessing talking about your feelings didn’t go well?” he asked tentatively
Jisung choked out a ‘no’ and repeated your exact reasoning
“That’s bullshit,” Minho stated
Jisung stared at him shocked, waiting for him to explain
“Sure dating is terrifying but hiding behind the dating ban is nothing but an excuse,” Minho expended
Jisung replied with his reasoning and Minho refused every claim
Jisung bit his lip, “ok well it’s not like I can do anything now,” he explained how he’d agreed and you would have to be the one who comes to him and tell him you’re ready
But Minho frustrated mumbled something under his breath and left
Thanks to your stellar performance the company said you and Jisung can have a break from your activities, that included your collective vlives, much to your relief
You couldn't imagine facing Jisung after what you told him. Not to mention you had already had an argument with Yuri about what you’d told Jisung
It was much the same as always; Yuri telling you to stop hiding behind the dating ban and you trying to explain you weren’t hiding behind it and this is the ebay option for everyone
You reached for yet another tib of ice cream hoping it would stop you from wanting to text Jisung
Any thought of him was painful but what was more painful was being apart
You missed your vlives, you missed hanging out with him after them, you missed the way his body melted into yours when he was draped over you on the sofa
Jisung tried taking his mind off the situation but nothing worked, not properly
Instead he dived back into work and finished the song he started all those months ago
At least this way he could work through his feelings
He frantically scribbled lyrics rewriting them to fit the beat of your bride track
He wanted the two songs to be connected even though the two of you couldn’t
“But?” Jisung asked with a mixture of hurt and frustration. If you liked each other what could possibly be stopping you?
“But, I’m not sure we should do anything right now. My dating ban’s only just been lifted and I don’t want to make things more difficult for either of us” you explained
Jisung was ready to argue, he was ready to present every piece of evidence that supported the two of you dating but this wasn't one he had prepared for
Much to his dismay he couldn’t argue with you on that point
Whatever happened he knew, that he would come out unscathed but you on the other hand. Well it would be a lot harder for you
His mouth opened and closed as you apologised before leaving him in the room alone with his thoughts
You gulped and went to perform your groups stage, you put on a show for the cameras and tried not to betray heartache in your eyes
Jisung did the same he finished his group’s stage and after neither of your groups won this particular award he went home disappointed
The rest of the members were getting slightly worried for him, exchanging glances
Minho ended up sitting down next to him on the sofa of their dorm
“I’m guessing talking about your feelings didn’t go well?” he asked tentatively
Jisung choked out a ‘no’ and repeated your exact reasoning
“That’s bullshit,” Minho stated
Jisung stared at him shocked, waiting for him to explain
“Sure dating is terrifying but hiding behind the dating ban is nothing but an excuse,” Minho expended
Jisung replied with his reasoning and Minho refused every claim
Jisung bit his lip, “ok well it’s not like I can do anything now,” he explained how he’d agreed and you would have to be the one who comes to him and tell him you’re ready
But Minho frustrated mumbled something under his breath and left
Thanks to your stellar performance the company said you and Jisung can have a break from your activities, that included your collective vlives, much to your relief
You couldn't imagine facing Jisung after what you told him. Not to mention you had already had an argument with Yuri about what you’d told Jisung
It was much the same as always; Yuri telling you to stop hiding behind the dating ban and you trying to explain you weren’t hiding behind it and this is the ebay option for everyone
You reached for yet another tib of ice cream hoping it would stop you from wanting to text Jisung
Any thought of him was painful but what was more painful was being apart
You missed your vlives, you missed hanging out with him after them, you missed the way his body melted into yours when he was draped over you on the sofa
Jisung tried taking his mind off the situation but nothing worked, not properly
Instead he dived back into work and finished the song he started all those months ago
At least this way he could work through his feelings
He frantically scribbled lyrics rewriting them to fit the beat of your bride track
He wanted the two songs to be connected even though the two of you couldn’t
You continued, “I heard your song, it was beautiful. It was emotional and heartbreaking and it made me feel a bit hopeless about love. I wanted to talk to my members about it but not matter what it didn’t seem right.”
Jisung listened intently his heart beating out of his chest
“That was until I realised there's no one I want to talk about these things with. I was being overly cautious not wanting to lose what we already have, but if we were meant to be then we’ll last.,” you explained, “Ji I really want to date you. I don’t care what happens, I just know I want to experience it with you.”
Jisung couldn’t help the grin on his face and he stepped closer. His eyes effortlessly travelled to you lips, down your collarbone and back up again
He let out a small breath tickling you until you couldn't take it anymore
He could feel you wanting to get closer, so he wrapped an arm around your waist, cupped your cheek with his hand and his lips finally landed on yours
You groaned, this was all you wanted and more
No matter how many times you imagined this moment the real thing was better
He pulled away and with half lidded eyes said “whatever happens we’ll weather the storm together. I promise.”
A/N: The ending is super rushed and I'm very sorry but I have been so close to finishing for so long and I needed this out of my drafts. Either way I hope you guys enjoy it :)
#han jisung x reader#han x reader#han jisung#han jisung imagines#han jisung scenarios#han jisung skz#han jisung stray kids#han jisung x y/n#han jisung angst#han jisung headcanons#han jisung headcanon#stray kids imagines#stray kids han#stray kids jisung
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What do you think of companies like colossal, who are working to bring back the mammoth and thylacine, among others? I’m on their email newsletter list because I’m fascinated and feel the need to keep up with their progress but will it ever actually happen? I’m not convinced. Hopeful, but not convinced
Thanks for the ask! I hope you don’t mind if I ramble a bit, haha; as with all extinction stories, this is something that I have a lot of feelings about.
For as long as I can remember, the various Mammoth People have been making announcements like clockwork that we “will have a live mammoth within ten years!” The first time I heard it was, oh, about twenty-five years ago.
Back then, the plan was to clone directly from permafrost tissue; my understanding is that now the strategy has shifted to gene-editing an elephant to make it into a mammoth. I’ve also heard similar ideas thrown around about trying to make a thylacine out of a numbat or Tasmanian devil, or a Dodo from a Nicobar pigeon. At that point, I have to wonder what the point of it all is?
Professedly, we want to bring these animals back in order to heal the wounds we have left in the web of life. To have them step back into their places, as though they had never left. But how could a genetically-modified numbat or elephant ever fill such bespoke shoes? Even if we were capable of it, how would we even begin to “program” the instincts and behaviors of animals of which we know so little?
Do we, instead, simply want the satisfaction of seeing a lost animal standing in front of us (or at least, something that looks like one)? Anyone who loves extinct species is familiar with the hunger for photos, videos, sound recordings—anything, to see them. Will we be happy if science can present us with the living, breathing equivalent of a museum’s goose-feathered imitation Dodo? A Disneyland sort of creature, like Franklin Dove’s unicorns, with no natural place outside of some big budget exhibition?
(Has the existence of rebred Tarpans and Heck Cattle soothed the ache we feel when we look at cave paintings of ancient horses and bulls?)
Personally, I would jump at the chance to see an extinct animal be alive again, in any form or capacity. Even just seeing a realistic CGI reconstruction of a passenger pigeon flock, or a Steller’s sea cow, would absolutely thrill me. Selfishly, I can admit that I do just want to see them—to have that lost experience of knowing what it was like to look at these lost creatures. As long as I feel that way, I can’t judge de-extinction efforts too harshly.
The fact is, though, that DNA is much more fragile and complicated that anyone could have guessed during the first heady days of Jurassic Park.
When Celia, the last living bucardo died, the effort to clone her was already in progress. The team had so many factors on their side: tissue samples collected while Celia was still alive; an ideal proxy species to carry the cloned offspring; a thorough understanding of the biology and reproductive mechanisms of goats. It was as close to an ideal situation as could be hoped for. Nearly 300 embryos were created; a single one survived to term. That clone died minutes after birth, due to a malformation of her lungs, giving the bucardo the rare distinction of being the only animal to go extinct twice.
And that’s not even getting into the problems presented by the theoretical cloning of egg-laying animals (which also represent the majority of extinct species).
Technology progresses in ways we could never imagine. One day, I’m sure the things that these groups promise will be possible, and more; we’ll discover the cure for cancer, and the cure for regret. For the time being, though, de-extinction is a self-indulgent distraction. It’s attention-getting clickbait, at the expense of animals that are still here to save—a plan to raise the crumbling hulk of the Titanic, while ignoring a thousand other ships sinking around us without a lifeline.
I know some of the companies involved do state that they intend to use their discoveries and funding to benefit extant endangered species, but I don’t think it undoes the damage that is done every time a website runs a headline like, “This Company Is Bringing Back the Dodo by 2030!”. It all erodes the gravity of extinction in a way that greatly concerns me. The more times a person sees de-extinction presented as a simple, achievable matter, the closer they will come to the conclusion that, well, extinction isn’t forever. And if the loss of a species can be so easily reversed, then why should anyone be overly concerned about its prevention?
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Again back to my last EOA post, and a comment I saw on a repost of it, I am 1000000% on board with the idea of the whole plot of Elena of Avalor, and some of the things in it, being a whole metaphor for Elena trying to keep herself from being driven to insanity aka becoming an evil dictator. Based on the personal research I’ve done, and connecting the dots to Elena’s character, I’ve noticed some key things in the show that sort of represent many “symptoms” of what a “clinically insane” person goes through.
Elena witnessed her own parents death right in front of her eyes. This alone should be traumatizing enough, but not even like 5 minutes later, Shuriki blasts her, but the amulet pulled her inside of it to save her. (Or at least, I like to think she did die, but her soul was sucked into the amulet, thus her possessing it, Five Nights At Freddy’s style). Elena is now sitting in the amulet, in what I think was a sort of state like Locked In Syndrome? Because when she did get out the amulet in Secret Of Avalor, she looked like she was sleeping, AND she forgot how to walk, hell even move around. So I think since she was in there for so long, she started “fusing” with the amulet, thus falling into a sort of coma, but still highly aware of whats going on around her + outside the amulet, but thats besides my point. She spends 40+ years, isolated from the world, with no one to talk to, no source of brain stimulation, no form of movement, just NOTHING. Shes trapped in a void. (*Void by Melanie Martinez starts playing*). Now looking at irl facts, there is no absolute way Elena didnt go insane in the amulet.
Looking at neuroscience, and the world of EOA, we can see the way Elena interacts with the world, and apply those statistics to Elena herself. In an article from The Royal Society Publishing, The Article titled “Perceived Social Isolation, Evolutionary Fitness and Health Outcomes: a LifeSpan Approach.” Written by Louise C. Hawkley, and John P. Capitanio states: “A sampling of recent studies shows that socially isolated housing of various social animal species at various stages of life and for various durations results in altered behaviour (e.g. anxious, depression-like, aggressive, passive, cognition/memory), physiology (e.g. changes in basal or stress–reactive corticosterone, blood pressure, inflammation, immune responses, hippocampal function) and mortality (e.g. post-stroke outcomes)” In the show, we can see Elena suffer through majority of these affects. Especially when it comes to her cognitive ability and critical thinking skills. We see her struggle hard in the show to solve problems, regarding the kingdom, and when communicating with other people.
I will also talk about the fact Elena can see ghosts, and Spirit Guides. I know, she has this power because “The amulet gave it to her.” But think of it this way: The amulet; her trauma, and Elena had to face “the trauma” for a LOOOOONG period of time. Another key factor when it comes to isolation, hallucinations. An Israeli adventurer/author Yossi Ghinsberg spent 3 weeks stranded in the Amazon rainforest (they actually made a movie about him‼️) Ghinsberg stated, due to him being isolated from society without any social contact/interaction, he experienced hallucinations. So what if metaphorically, Elena seeing the Spirit Guides, and ghosts, are her having hallucinations from spending 41 years away from society?
Elena’s dress. That goddamn dress. Its mentioned earlier that isolation can affect the brain’s cognitive abilities, and emotional health. So you basically would have trouble regulating your emotions, and your emotions would be all over the place. RING ANY BELLSSSSS⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️ Her magic dress is a metaphor for her decline in her cognitive skills.
I now conclude my essay on how crazy I am about this damn kids show. I love Elena sm shes such a complicated character and I LOVE ITTTTTTTTT
#elena of avalor#essay writing#character analysis#elena castillo flores#i spent too much time on this#i thought about this way too hard#eoa is just a metaphor for insanity#eoa isnt real#i love eoa#i am crazy#i need to have devices taken away from me
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I'm writing this to you because I sort of don't have anyone else to talk about this. I hope you don't mind. I kind of got into a spat over the internet with the lqbtq people. Do you identify with that group? (you don't have to mention it if you're not comfortable disclosing it). The thing is I'm straight but I have considered myself to be an ally all this time but maybe not a very loud one you can say. I don't have any issues with them and I'm in no way homophobic (to each their own, do whatever the fuck you wanna) but they were making fun about straight people being lame or whatever which I found a little uncalled for. To me it feels like how can you expect to find an ally in me if you keep being so hostile towards me. Like they literally don't know anything about me yet I'm being bombarded with messages about how 'queer people will rule the world and the days of my freedom are numbered' (someone said this word to word) and stuff like that. I'm sorry if I'm trauma dumping but I feel quite embarrassed and upset about this and I can't help but hide in the anonymity of the internet.
I don't like labels but for the purpose of this discussion, I'm bread.
(pansexual)
As an ally (tbh, of any minority group), mostly they ask for respect. Just to be treated like normal human beings and seen as equals to those in more privileged positions. For a long time these groups of people have been unfairly treated as lesser than simply because of their sexual orientation and/or gender identity. I don't necessarily agree with the mentality of "an eye for an eye" - ex: heedlessly make fun of of heteros simply since there's little to no social repercussions in this current social climate - and yet I see where they're coming from. it is frustrating that cis-passing heterosexuals are so easily socially accepted and they have no idea how easy it is, how their identity is not seen as some kind of circus performance, how affirming that you are on the spectrum leads to a sudden interrogation, and how you abruptly become representative / role model / pinnacle of all people on the spectrum (which some people are accepting of and some aren't).
I think speaking poorly of people (even in a general sense) is unsavory and rarely does any good except in extreme situations. But, anyway, basing your perception of an entire group on a clustering of shitty individuals isn't fair either. Assumptions and conclusions of an entire group should not be made off a small sample size that is mostly likely not representative. Making general statements from a loud minority leads to misunderstandings. Plus, you can't change the minds of toxic individuals. Can't be a martyr to those that don't think they need saving. Most people wouldn't want to associate / surround themselves with shitty people regardless of their sexual and/or gender identity. Personal identity does not dictate behavior and shouldn't be treated as such.
tl;dr: If someone is acting like an asshole, they're probably just an asshole lol.
Being outside of the norm / nonconventional does not mean that you exempt from being narrow-minded or ignorant - by choice and/or lack of experiences. Being inside the norm / conventional doesn't excuse you from that either. Also, a lot of the time this type of aggressive behavior is simply projection from past traumas, not necessarily an attack on your person. I don't think you should take it that way, especially since this is online and behind a keyboard. Block and move on. Better to not engage. It will show them that this type of behavior is not acceptable and they won't be getting the satisfaction of a reaction from you as such reactions will only enforce their behavior.
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So apparently there’s some stirring of the top bottom stuff going on and since I... really like numbers, I thought I’d take a look (also because I’m so concrete it would literally never occur to me that someone would send me an ask that wasn’t... you know, genuine!).
Charts below break!
Data Collection:
AO3, searched within fics tagged as Harry Potter fandom and then tagged with Harry & Draco as a relationships, only fics tagged E. Four categories of search per year:
Include Bottom Harry Potter, Exclude Bottom Draco Malfoy (HP !DM)
Include Bottom Draco Malfoy, Exclude Bottom Harry Potter (DM !HP)
Exclude Bottom Harry Potter, Exclude Bottom Draco Malfoy (!HP !DM)
Include Bottom Harry Potter, Include Bottom Draco Malfoy (HP DM)
I did not include 2022 numbers as the year is not over. As a check, I also noted total fics per year and total fics tagged explicit and made sure my four mutually exclusive groups added up to my total explicit count.
So the obvious take from this is that the majority of fics are not being tagged with who bottoms. In the cases where they are tagged, Bottom Draco fics are tagged more than Bottom Harry fics every year I looked at. The ratio gets smaller and smaller every year, but even in 2021 the ratio is 1.73, with over 100 more fics being tagged for Bottom Draco than Bottom Harry. The ratio droped substantionally in 2015, and I am not sure why (maybe a new archive was imported with different tagging conventions?).
To get a better sense of how it looks, this is the chart without the “neither” fic numbers included:
This chart gives a sense for each individual year, how the fics are labeled (not to be compared to each other, of course):
Also just because I think it’s sort of interesting, here’s a comparison of the proportions of of E/Non-E fics, definitely looks like there’s a downward trend in E fics there.
The one other thing I was interested in was the claim that there was a trolling incident that led to this reversal of dynamics (which, as we can see from the data, didn’t happen). I went back and looked and my own rage-written fic was posted on April 28, 2021). So I looked at the montly stats for Only Bottom HP/Only Bottom DM/Total E fic posted by month and then eyeballed the proporations. So, it is true that May of 2021 is the only month where Bottom HP fics were higher (both in absolute numbers and proportion of total E fics), but that’s the only month that happens (4/2020 to 4/2022). Over that timeframe, about 6.56% of E fics are exclusively Bottom HP, while on average, exclusively Bottom DM are ~14%. In the months following, in fact, in general the Bottom HP numbers are pretty low.
So, what (if anything) does this mean? For me, for one, it solidifies that I personally really dislike reducing fic to this particular dynamic. I think it would be really interesting to do some investigating into why authors do or do not tag their fics for this dynamic, since I’m guessing most of us are aware that it’s a hot button topic (and has been in every fandom I’ve ever been in or hung out near). I know why I don’t, but I wouldn’t want to assume. Maybe I’ll write a survey.
I find the downward trend of E fics in general vs the upward trend of proportionally more fics being tagged for Bottom HP interesting, but it’s definitely not the majority (May 2021 notwithstanding).
Purely on a personal level, it was interesting to see the huge increase in sheer numbers of fics being written and posted to AO3, which is probably why I feel so overwhelmed haha.
caveat on the data: this is absolutely not a representative sample, nor is it random sample in any way. This does not account for all the fics that are not labeled but do have one dynamic or the other present but the idea of doing that data collection is absolutely fucking beyond me. So who knows what the actual numbers look like. This is simply an overview of how things are specifically tagged on AO3. In addition, this doesn’t take into any fics tagged solely by who tops.
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a few explanations for some things that have come up!!
why a 1v1 pvp?
tumblr polls don’t have either a ranked or a multiple choice options, so this is the best next thing. if i had more than 2 in each, i wouldn’t know what is ppl’s 2nd choice unless it is the second most frequent 1st choice, so to speak. having 1v1 polls would allow me to compare more data.
also, making ppl choose between two is less choice anxiety-inducing in my opinion. yes, a bit more work for me, but choosing between two is a little less work for y’all :)
why in order?
a few reasons.
first, i think a lot of ppl have a strong association between their opinion on the season and their opinion on the episode, so i didn’t want ppl implicitly comparing the seasons themselves instead of comparing episodes. ofc besides the finale-premiere pairings but i think the fact that they are supposed to be direct cause-effect episodes neutralizes that.
second, due to the fact that the show has a weird balance of episodic and serialized storylines, the general quality of the sequences of episodes is kind of inconsistent. this led me to thinking of this quality of the show as my own kind of randomizer. there are some pairings that are rather unfair, i admit, but that’s just how it turned out to be. i do have some failsafes installed in the calculation of the future rounds, so don’t worry abt that too much.
third, i think it’s a lot easier to compare the quality of the episodes when in context with each other. it’s just easier to remember how you felt going between one episode to another, so it would allow for a more informed opinion.
tumblr fandom is not a representative sample and is very cliquey.
you’re right! but it sure is fun to see two ppl who i know for a fact are mutuals reblog the same post and tag it with “SWEEP” for opposite choices.
on a serious note, yes, there are definitely going to be polls that were heavily influenced by where they got reblogged to, but even within the same circles, opinions range far and wide.
if it makes you feel any better, i can already tell that the polls have traveled across a variety of character-girlism association - and there’s still about a week to go for a good chunk of these polls.
what’s next?
well, we’ll see. once all polls are done, i am going to analyze how each episode did in both of its contests and how each of its opponents did in their own contests as well (and, if necessary to specify even further, how THEIR opponents did, too.)
additionally, i’ll put into consideration just how wide the winning margin is. a 51% victory is obviously different from a 90% victory.
also, even though i do hope for an approximately similar voter turnout for all polls, it would obviously not be guaranteed, as some episodes are simply much more popular or people have stronger opinions about them than about others. i would then also put into consideration just how many people were very active about promoting and voting for it…. even though i do hope i get a lot of votes in all of the polls <3
the exact plan for the future rounds is not exactly clear to me right now as i have a few different options. all would be dependent on the variety and frequency of similar results. there is a chance i would just be using the first round as a preliminary round to figure out how to sort the episodes into better fitting brackets for an actual bracketed march madness type selection. or maybe i’d try to find a way to make it a very specific ranked poll, specifically using the relative results from the first round. + other ideas i have that will become a lot more clear once i have the first batch of official results.
the best thing everybody can do now is just continue voting! all of the polls are tagged with the season number (e.g. #s4 or #s10) for the ease of navigation, so i encourage everybody to vote. the earlier seasons will finish their polls sooner than the later ones, so make sure we’re voting consistently. i would also appreciate any and all promotion for any polls that have less than average number of votes.
finally, i just wanna thank all of you for indulging me in this :) means a whole lot!
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hi, i have cfs and am trying to collect evidence that exercise would make me worse so my insurance won‘t force me to do get which i know from experience would make me worse. do you happen to know of any studies on this? is this review ok or is it too biased: “a review on cognitive behavioral therapy (cbt) and graded exercise therapy (get) in myalgic encephalomyelitis (me)/ chronic fatigue syndrome (cfs): cbt/ get is not only ineffective and not evidence-based, but also potentially harmful for many patients with me/cfs” by twisk and maes?
This is sort of the type of question I was thinking of taking when I reopen my patreon where I explain studies instead of basically writing research essays (the old way I was gonna do the Patreon). :)
I would personally not use Twisk's paper, because it is very strongly worded, and while I love good academic snark, it will come across as biased. It's also not really a strong paper...for example:
Twisk is basing this entire point that CBT/GET isn't that effective on the fact that a metastudy cited studies that looked at people with any form of chronic fatigue and not ME/CFS. But all you can really say about this is that the studies cited don't mean anything about ME/CFS specifically and the study is flawed. Not that an entire treatment form has no effectivity. It's also a bad idea to base an entire point on a study you know is flawed, if the point you're making is not "this study is flawed."
Instead, if you wanted to use some aspects of this paper, I would take the studies cited by Twisk instead and look at those, eg:
I will say that because Twisk's paper was published in '09, everything cited in it is more than 10 years old. I would not use them as primary evidence but instead as simply evidence that researchers have been investigating issues with exercise as treatment for a while.
I would utilize this paper on updated NICE guidelines published 2022 because NICE is Britain's National Institute for Health and Care Excellence and it outright says GET is harmful: https://www.mdpi.com/2227-9032/10/5/898
You can also directly link NICE's guidelines (2020): https://www.nice.org.uk/guidance/ng206/documents/evidence-review-7
Post exertional malaise studies (worsened symptoms after exercise for a prolonged period of time): https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.1365-2796.2010.02228.x
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/20095909/
https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fneur.2020.01025/full
Monitoring treatment harm in ME/CFS (2019) essentially just says that clinics do not really monitor the effectivity or harm that treatment causes, despite drop out rates from treatment: https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/1359105319854532?url_ver=Z39.88-2003&rfr_id=ori:rid:crossref.org&rfr_dat=cr_pub%20%200pubmed
Myalgic encephalomyelitis/chronic fatigue syndrome patients’ reports of symptom changes following cognitive behavioural therapy, graded exercise therapy and pacing treatments: Analysis of a primary survey compared with secondary surveys (2019): over 1k patient participants (more than a representative sample number wise) "graded exercise therapy brings about large negative responses in patients (54%–74%)"
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Drone to the Ghost Zone
Ectoberhaunt 2022, Side Order. Prompt: Harvest
Summary: Jack and Maddie Fenton send a drone to the ghost zone in order to learn a bit more about it, when suddenly they come across a Blob Ghost.
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“It’s time to send the drone to the other side of the portal to collect data. Care to do the honors Jack?” Maddie stood in front of the Fenton Portal holding a Fenton Drone in her hands, said drone was a normal model bought online that’s been modified to be able to send data through the ectoplasmic interference that’s commonly found in the Ghost Zone, reinforced with Fenton Ecto-Resistant material, a camera that’s been upgraded to zoom in great distances, a new filter with which some ectoplasm could be collected and, just to make sure, a small Ectogun to defend itself with while being controlled by the Fentons.
“On it Maddie!” Jack walked to her side and picked up the drone, turning it on and watching as the drone’s propellers slowly began spinning until it was able to stay afloat on it’s own. Being handed the controller by his wife, Jack slowly controlled the drone until it crossed the portal to the Ghost Zone, and after a little turbulence while crossing the veil tunnel to the other side, Jack and Maddie were finally able to see the Ghost Zone in it’s entirety. “I know we stand against ghosts and all they represent, but I still can’t get tired of this beautiful scenery”
“I understand you Jack, maybe one day we’ll be able to safely explore the other side, but that’s not today.” A green background, shearling rivers of concentrated neon green ectoplasms flowed over in the distance, the presence of stairs colored dark green and dark purple that lead to nowhere, doors of various sizes and decorations colored mostly by different shades of purple and the rocky formations right next to the portal that worked as some sort of platform or entrance towards the Fenton Portal. “Things are pretty empty near the portal today, so it should be safe to delve a little deeper.”
“I’ll check out behind the portal just in case, don’t want any straggler ghosts to gain an upper hand over us.” With that Jack turned the drone around and drove it above the portal, and after confirming that there were no ghosts hiding behind it, he began flying the drone forwards slowly, taking into view all the straggling ghosts that were wandering around in the far distance. After a few minutes of taking notes on everything that crossed the view of the camera, things began getting boring. “Should I do something else with the Fenton-Drone Maddie? I know we’re collecting data, but we can’t collect much from only the ectoplasmic air present in the ambience, and the recordings being done with the upgraded camera will take a while once we’re done to render well enough to be workable.”
“Mmmhh, maybe we should collect some samples of the rocky formation that’s near the portal. I know we have many samples of it already but I’d rather we keep collecting them and having nothing change than having something change and not know about it until it’s too late”
“Yeah, that’s a good idea. I’ll just turn around and-WOAH,” Jack recoiled, separating his face from the screen of the remote. “Did you see that Mads?”
“See what honey? What did you see?” asked worried the Ectobiologist and Ectochemist of the two, worried and letting her pencils and papers where she was reviewing some numbers down.
“I saw a ghost fly across the screen!”
“WHAT!?” Maddie practically flew across the room to stand next to the Ectoengineer and Ectophysicist, latching herself onto his arms as she tried to watch the screen for any movement. A few seconds passed and another ghost crossed the screen, this time a bit farther away, allowing the pair of scientists to see what ghosts was the one they crossed paths with, it being a Blob Ghost. “Phew, it was just a blob ghost.”
“Yeah, though I’ll be honest I didn’t expect one of those blob ghosts to appear so close to the portal, I always thought that they ‘lived’ farther from the portal.”
“Maybe there’s a reason for it. Would you mind turning the camera a little and follow the blob for a few seconds dear?”
“On it Maddie.” and after showing the blob ghost to the camera, Jack zoomed out a bit to showcase it’s surroundings as well. Strangely enough, there were only 2 other blob ghosts present as well.
“That’s weird, usually those blob ghosts travel in packs of between 7 and 12 of them, but here we have only 3…” Maddie was worried a second there about what the lack of blob ghosts could mean, however before she could give it more thought the blob ghosts present turned towards the camera and smiled, their glinting red eyes shining more than before.
“...What are they doing?” asked Jack, readying the gun on the drone just in case.
“...Jack,” whispered Maddie, looking straight into the screen as the gears of her brain began turning, “could you turn around please? I think they’re looking behind the drone”
Slowly but surely, Jack turned the drone around, and what welcomed them was the sight of a wave of green approaching them fast, way too fast for the drone to safely move away to a safe place, and as such had no choice but to brace the drone for the impact. Jack thought of using the gun for a moment, but after realizing that attacking what essentially looks like a huge wall of ectoplasm would be either useless or a bad idea, he chose against it and got ready for impact. Said impact never came however, the screen only turned neon green for a few seconds and then went back to normal.
“Hold on a second, are those…” Maddie took the controller of the drone from her husband’s hands and turned around the drone, focusing the camera on what now could be identified as a giant horde of blob ghosts, one that was about at least consisting of 150 blob ghosts, “they are! I’ve never seen so many blob ghosts together at once.”
“Neither have I Mads, I wonder why that happened? Maybe there’s some phenomena happening in the Ghost Zone that’s changing the properties of ectoplasm in certain places?”
“Maybe the Blob Ghost are imitating the behavioral patterns of living animals and are simulating a migration season?”
“Either way we’ll have to collect some samples of both of these, do you want to analyze the data brought by the filters of the drone or fish for some blob ghosts with the Fenton Ghost Fisher?”
“I’ll work on the analysis, I know how much you love fishing dear.”
“You’re right I do” kissing his wife in the cheek, Jack turned his back to the portal. “Would you mind measuring the distance between the blob ghosts and the portal and bring the drone back? I’ll go get the Fenton Ghost Fisher meanwhile.”
“Sure thing honey, be careful tangling the line.”
“I’ll get that fishing rod and then it’ll be time to fish for some ghosts!”
#Ectoberhaunt22#EH Order#Day 10#Harvest#Danny Phantom#Maddie Fenton#Jack Fenton#Blob Ghosts#Ghost Zone
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Experimenter (Vigilante Archetype)
Ever since the idea of masked vigilantes made it’s way to pulp serials, of course someone had to combine the concept with another pulp and comic staple, the mad scientist.
While there are no shortage of superheroes created by mad scientists, including those that transform into a brutish form, those are often best represented by the brute or mutated defender archetypes.
If we really want a mad scientist vigilante, one that yes, has all manner of potions and such, but also fantastical things like constructed allies, and so on, we go for the experimenter.
That being said, this archetype… well, you’ll run into the limitations very quickly, because at it’s core this archetype is still a flavor of the vaguely rogue-ish vigilante class, and it shows. They get the same emotionally-reactive transformation as the brute archetype that everyone “loved” so much, but without built-in unarmed strike in favor of crafting and knowledge.
But hey, maybe that appeals to you if you want to play a character that does a lot of detective work and puts their brain to good use and not just their brawn. Things to consider.
In any case, these science-themed heroes use stealth and assumed identities to conceal their many strange experiments from the public. Whether they use their transformed form and other creations for the good of said community or not, however, is up to them.
Like many alchemists, these vigilantes can craft a mutagen to bolster their bodies at the expense of their minds. However, like certain alchemists and the brute archetype, this mutagen is tied to emotional instability, and they can often find themselves transforming without it in stressful situations, and in such cases, they act erratically. At the very least, however, they can take mutagen discoveries in place of vigilante talents, letting them improve the mutagen or create different types like cognatogens.
This mutagen is also heavily tied to their vigilante identity, allowing them to switch identities when they drink it.
Despite not being spellcasters, they also learn how to brew potions of all sorts, and can even use samples of other potions to help craft their own.
Their vast stores of scientific knowledge almost guarantees that these scientists know a little about every topic.
They can also use their knowledge of engineering to craft a variety of constructs, creating useful spies, battle companions, or even animate armor for them to wear, though obviously they need to supply the materials and any required spells themselves.
Finally, their mutagens can last for extended periods the way that most alchemists of a certain level of mastery do.
Interested in a sneaky smart character with the ability to hulk out a bit from time to time? This archetype may appeal to you. Honestly I don’t think the drawback of occasionally activating your transformation by accident and being confused the whole time is offset by the benefits, but that’s just me. Also being able to craft constructs is nice, but super expensive. If you can make it work though, good for you. Honestly the best advice I can give is build around one or two different mutagen types, and bolster yourself further with buffing potions and oils, plus some for stealthy utility uses, and maybe pay for one big combat construct and maybe a handful of smaller stealthy ones like clockwork spies.
While this variety of vigilante scientist is geared towards physical enhancement and transformation, You shouldn’t be afraid to have fun with it and explore other disciplines. The craft alchemy skill opens a lot of doors to interesting utility tools just as easily as potions can, so keep that in mind. Perhaps more important is deciding why they decided on hiding their achievements and experiments.
Fleeing his original home to pursue his “frivolous” experiments in peace, the duergar chemist Ognizar seeks to show the world the wonders of his pursuits, even if he has to use mutagens and disguises to do so. Taking on the mantle of the Vanishing Stone, he uses his mutagen to take on a stony contenance.
Alchemical experiements are common in Valgas, where mutant horrors like chon chons linger in the streets the way natural vermin might in an ordinary city. Still, even in this place there are genius alchemists that must hide their work, whether or not they use it for good or ill.
Despite their name, the Iron Legion is no military organization, but rather a group of vigilante warriors that wear identical armor, and utilize bolstering potions to become terrors against their foes in the night. However, even that is a deception, for there is only one living member, the others being automaton replicas the original uses to disguise his movements.
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It was never mentioned what colour(s) would suit Emmy best personality-wise and fasion-wise, but in Kill Switch, Will imagined her in blue (panties, but not clothings). What colour(s) do you think could or would represent Emory' personality & fashion choices, and why?
I always figured that blue was one of his favorite colors because navy was Thunder Bay Prep's school color. We see it in their uniforms. So he would have most often seen her in blue between the jacket and skirt, plus the band uniform. Along with that, I figured she probably wore jeans and jean overalls most often outside of school. It may just be a color he likes to see her in.
I am not the person to ask about fashion or style. I'm very basic and don't have really any idea of style. But I have posted about what I think her work style would be before here.
In that post, I said I didn't know if she'd wear much jewelry. This is because she works with her hands, so anything that could get caught or dangled might be a hazard. However, based on her coloring, I think she'd look best in gold if she did choose to wear it. Though, we do see her pick a silver dress for her wedding so maybe I'm wrong.
I really do think she loves jeans. They're comfortable, they can be loose and relaxed, fitted, dressed down or dressed up a bit. She can get them dirty with grease or paint and still use them. Jeans are very useful to her.
As far as PD goes, they seem to put her in a lot of black. I'm not sure if this is just a go-to for the series, as in all these characters have in common is them liking darker things, or because that's just an easy color to work with, of if that's just Emory.
This time I went to the official Nightfall Pinterest Board to see what PD would put her in. It's not always easy because PD doesn't exactly label what the pin is inspo for. Sometimes I'm taking a guess that it's Emory related.
So I'm gonna stand by my assumption that the girl would love a graphic tee. I said from a favorite movie, but I forgot that this girl is a true nerd. She'd go for the comics too. What I am surprised by are the collared shirts. It seemed a little to... classy for what I imagined Emory wearing. To me, this style fits more with Winter. Maybe I thought Em would find them fussy, and she seemed like a no-fuss type. You learn something new everyday. I did picture her in turtlenecks, so maybe I was going in the right direction?
I figured she'd like a good sweater, being from New England.
But as we can see, from the colors that PD chose, Emory would stick to basic neutrals. Tans, blues, blacks, whites. Her biggest style choices might be the graphic tees. Whether this is her style because it's simple and she didn't have a lot growing up or just what she feels comfortable, is up for interpretation. I think it's what she'd feel comfortable in. As she returns to Thunder Bay as an adult, without the all the emotion baggage she's been carrying, I could see her expanding her taste, opening up to new things, but I still think this would be her fall-backs, her comfortable, her go-tos. Nothing wrong with that.
Here are a sample of the images I find on Pinterest that fit the image I have of Emmy in her everyday life, from home to work. I think I have put her in more colors, especially browns, than PD. Browns just work for the coloring she has in my head. Don't get me wrong. Emory would own a ton of black, but...
I couldn't find a good graphic tee styled the way I see emory styling it so I chose to forego it.
And the Reverie dress from PD's Pinterest broad just for fun
Let me know if I missed anything or if you have any input. This sort of goes along with the idea from the other discussion that we don't get a good picture of Em because she's so far removed from her usual environment. Most of the time she's either wearing her uniform or clothes that aren't hers. Even in the past scenes.
... i just realized all of those pictures have long sleeves. That's not intentional.
#asked and answered#devil's night series stuff#emory scott#character discussion#clothes#style#response to prev ask#asked and answered 80
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Part of the reason I dropped out of college was because for one specific art (painting) class, we had to buy materials to bring in and when I went to the supply store I walked around for 10 minutes (it wasn’t a very large store) trying to find an item before my mom (who’d driven me there) finally pressured me into asking an employee where it would be. And then I couldn’t find a second item and I was already so stressed from asking the first time and my mom was growing tired, so I panicked and just didn’t buy that item. I got about half way through the semester before the professor was walking around one time checking out progress and asked me where was [material]. I admitted I didn’t have any and they looked extremely annoyed before grabbing a container of it from a cabinet and allowing me to borrow it. I had to put it back at the end of every class. The shame never left me. Another reason I dropped out was because for (that same class) our final assignment was to create 3 paintings that represent “you” and I could not for the life of me think of more than one thing, because what is self identity and what personal life did I have going on anyways, so I again panicked and just dropped the class even though it was so close to the end. I kept driving to campus (in the morning) to pretend I still had that class but instead I would either move to the back seat to lay down and nap or cry, or head to the library on campus and just be on my phone for the duration of what that class was. Another reason I dropped out was because, while a communications requirement is mandatory, I foolishly failed my interpersonal relationships class because I kept forgetting about the weekly online quiz until Friday (when it was already too late), so I tried to take the same class again but with a different professor the next semester only to fail again with an even worse score. So then I tried to take a public speaking class instead, but our first assignment was to create a “short” presentation to introduce “about you” and to bring either a little trinket to pass around or some sort of cultural food or drink that you can give enough samples for the whole class; again, I panicked and dropped the class after that first day, so I never completed my communications requirement. Another reason I dropped out was because I had enter into community college as “undecided” and was starting my fourth year (aren’t you only supposed to be there 2, maybe 3, years before transferring lol) and still had no idea what I wanted to get a degree in. I had only visited the coinciding office once (again, as is probably clear by now, because of anxiety) to see what requirements I still needed for an “art” major (because that was the only thing I could think of that I didn’t absolutely loathe and could maybe see a future in that doesn’t involve becoming a teacher in that subject myself) for the specific college I would have transferred to (which I only said the one I did because that was where my sister had gone). Another reason I dropped out is because the longer I was there, the more frequently I would think to myself while sitting at a red light “I could step on the gas and crash into traffic right now or swerve and clash into the streetlight or a tree too,” until eventually I was thinking about it every day. I’ve only been at this job for 2 days and I’ve already thought about crashing the car and getting myself sent to the hospital multiple times.
#personal#negative#sorry for the long post I needed to vent because god knows I wouldn’t be able to SPEAK this to explain it properly#I would get too emotional and start stumbling my words until I’m unable to explain at all
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Startup Culture
Unquestionably, culture is important in forming a society since it transmits the values, aesthetics, and beliefs of the populace from generation to generation. It influences how we live and how we see ourselves and other people. It is a style of life that represents a whole society.
In companies, culture is just as significant as it is in establishing societies. It influences corporate identity and aids in the development and success of businesses. The common business ideals, the people that make them up, and how they interact with one another make up a firm's culture. In this blog post, we'll talk about the “startup culture“ that most businesses adopt to foster expansion and economic activity.
What is Startup Culture?
Startup culture refers to the shared values, ideas, and convictions that influence how individuals work. It is a relatively new sort of workplace culture that typically reflects the passion and personalities of team members. Startup culture aims to remove any growth constraints that more established firms may have. Moreover, this culture is well-known for being innovative, passionate, and flexible rather than strict.
Features of a Startup Culture
The startup culture's feel is primarily influenced by four factors:
1. Passion
One of the most significant aspects of startup culture is that work does not always seem like heavy lifting. Startup team members are driven by their passions while working towards a common goal. As a result, people are more likely to work hard conquer challenges and feel a strong sense of togetherness.
2. Adaptability
Information and knowledge can move at a rate that significantly enhances all parts of the organization. It is the aspect that is more obvious because it can be seen in how employees operate, how offices are set up, and how brainstorming sessions are conducted.
3. Flexibility
Traditional business cultures require a long time to implement new ideas and make adjustments. On the other hand, a startup culture is more flexible which can aid in the speedy and effective expansion of a company. As a result, businesses may expand rapidly and effectively through quick decision-making.
4. Authenticity
Startup-Business-Owners support creating an authentic culture. With this kind of culture, they can establish a workplace where their staff members enjoy going to work and are motivated to be productive and engaged at all times.
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The Significance of Startup Culture
Because start-ups are incubators for new ideas, they create jobs, which means more career prospects; more employment results in a stronger economy. Let's review the following points that indicate the importance of a startup culture.
It fosters an atmosphere where innovation, teamwork, and risk-taking are valued and recognized.
It raises employee engagement and morale and aids in luring top talent to your company.
It welcomes fresh perspectives and is willing to take chances.
It supports innovation, promotes growth, and aids in creating a sense of community inside an organization.
It encourages staff members to participate in extracurricular activities like sports teams or volunteer initiatives.
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You can get daily boosters, sample test papers, eNotes, academic videos, and much more with the aid of this wonderful gateway, which will finally aid you in receiving good scores. Furthermore, "study24hr.com" enables teachers and educational institutes to publish their notes on its website to get leads from aspiring individuals.
Suggestions for Creating a Startup Culture
You must create a strong corporate culture if you want your staff to work together successfully. Here are some effective tips that can help you in creating a productive culture for your company.
1. Choose the Right Employees
When developing a startup culture, hiring the right people entails more than just finding the most qualified candidate or the finest resume. Examine their mental and physical well-being, what it will take to inspire them, and whether or not they mesh well with the rest of your team.
2. Create a set of values
Establish your company's ideals early on and promote them frequently. Consider what matters most to your business. You can also invite your team members to sit by themselves and list the company values they believe are relevant to your business.
Setting an example for your team is the most effective approach to communicating your values. Give the team specific input regarding the quality of your items if you place a high priority on product quality. Give them plenty of time and tools to address quality problems.
3. Care for your employees
Showing care and concern for your employees is the next stage in developing your startup culture. Remember, individuals could want to do a decent job, but you want to make sure that your staff wants to do the best job. And this could be done when your employees know that you care for their well-being and success.
4. Establish a pleasant workplace
Provide your employee's refreshments and tranquil space. They will be more motivated and productive as a result, and it will also make work more enjoyable for them. Additionally, it demonstrates to workers that taking breaks is not just acceptable but encouraged.
The Final Thoughts
For long-term internal and external success, startups must establish a strong business culture. You can create an atmosphere where people like working together towards shared goals while also seeing outcomes they can be proud of by emphasizing cooperation, flexibility, transparency, responsibility, and rewarding hard effort. You'll be well on your way to creating a vibrant workplace culture that will act as the cornerstone of your firm if you keep these suggestions in mind!
#startup culture#business#startups#productivity#success#workplace#passion#personalization#study24hr#values#ethics#goals
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@tototavros replied to my last "further thoughts" post
That's very interesting, I haven't used deep nets to my knowledge. Also, how do these deep nets "learn" without being "glorified pattern recognition engines"? It's not just an additional loss function, but also a different way of representing the signal space (although I could be wrong), right?
The main difference is that the additional loss term is not applied to the output of these nets, which are trained to produce a good image.
To clarify, with CNNs you have a net that is trained to "learn" features that can be used as input to another net that will do the prediction task.
But it turns out that CNN nets are not just doing image recognition, they are very good images. So there's no reason to train them for "classification," where the input is another image that you want to predict, but the output of interest is a single class label. You can just train them to have good-looking outputs and call it a day.
(If you don't have a lot of data, the usual procedure is to train them on one image and then use that as your "master copy," which you'll train on a larger dataset, and then use that as your master copy. This is actually fine; in any situation where you're getting a lot of training data, it's usually more efficient to train on small chunks and "unfreeze" them as you get bigger chunks. That's what I do when I'm trying to pre-train a thing on a specific type of data, like "3D model of a molecule," etc.)
There are also unsupervised nets, where you don't need an external target to train with. They work like CNNs but without the intermediate-feature step, because they start out with raw pixels. The resulting model is "conditional," in the sense that it would still "recognize" things (say) in the fashion of a CNN, but if a different prediction task was needed, then it wouldn't know what to do with it.
In contrast, most nets I've seen in the last two or so years have been "unconditional," in the sense that they were trained as end-to-end predictors. (The few nets I know about that are not like that are not very well-known outside of narrow domains.) Because you can use an end-to-end net to predict anything, you can "unfreeze" it and learn a richer internal feature space (see here if you're curious).
This is actually sort of a major goal of "AI," though I wouldn't phrase it that way. The idea is that in an era when data is so cheap, you can always afford to start with a basic feature-space model, and then learn features, and then re-train the feature-space model.
For instance, consider what a typical GAN net can do to an image. It takes as its input, an image, and then "displays" an image which has the same distribution, but is also the result of randomly sampling from a different distribution. Typically, you would expect the latter distribution to be much more abstract, like "a drawing of a cloud or a tree," etc. You can "unfreeze" any GAN net and learn a new feature space, a new abstract distribution. Or you can use a CNN net, which already has some abstract distribution learned, to "invert" an image into a new "feature-space" distribution (i.e. an image from a distribution that is very different from the one the CNN net was trained on). You can then train the original net on this "inversion."
The idea is, you can get a good net by "unfreezing" and learning new features. And you can get new nets just by inverting old ones. This is, in a sense, the very important connection between deep nets and GAN nets, where the learnable space (i.e. the space of models that can do what CNN nets can do) contains many more than just "convolutional" nets.
(I have a related post here, where I compare a large dataset to the learnable subset of its space.)
Anyway, that's what "learning features" means. But it's not a way of representing the input, just a way of describing the input. And in fact, it's easy to imagine a net with only convolutional weights that could learn features, which is how you interpret them.
It would be more accurate to describe CNN nets as "glorified pattern recognition engines" because they are learning features.
To be clear: I'm not arguing against the use of CNN nets, or against the importance of learning features. CNN nets are wonderful and a big success story (I've always thought so myself). It's just that the typical CNN net (including CNN nets that are used to train nets that do the usual prediction task) is not one of those nets that can "learn features," and this is a distinction that you can make.
(If you are curious about "why CNNs exist at all," I recommend the notes of this lecture -- I'm only giving a summary of some of it here.)
(A long side-note: some people say things like "convolutional nets can learn features" because CNNs use convolutional operations to detect features, but the actual feature detection is done by fully connected layers, in CNNs, whereas feature learning is done by convolutional layers)
(But, if you want to do AI but not with nets like CNNs, I think the way forward is something like "GAN" nets, where you use GANs and conditional nets to learn a richer internal feature space, and then train end-to-end nets that can take advantage of that space.)
Anyway, there's a distinction here. When people talk about "learning features," they probably mean like, "using the weights of the CNN to detect features." I think people who talk about the importance of learning features are underplaying the distinction that you can make between "learned features" and "fully connected GAN-like nets" like AlexNet.
It's just a question of what you mean by "learning features":
"Using the weights of the CNN to detect features" = "using the weights to detect features" = "using the weights to detect features"
Yes, but only in the context of an image. You can "unfreeze" an end-to
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Realtor Business Card Graphics, Designs & Templates
In truth, 40% of home patrons and sellers discover their real estate agent via a referral or friend. However, one should never underestimate the power of a Business card. Many realtors carry business cards to determine a popularity and entice potential patrons.
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An email handle, a telephone quantity, and your workplace tackle work for this. Asal Shahindoust is a seasoned copy-editor and content material author who's obsessive about storytelling and invoking emotion via writing. In her free time, she finds consolation in reading and writing poetry and considers herself a music connoisseur. Check out this record of helpful ideas realtor business cards that will help in making your cards more than just a level of contact. For example, suppose someone picked up your card in “Jenny’s Coffeeshop” and scans the QR code. This doesn’t mean you need a person design for each place, but a minimum of completely different dedicated telephone numbers.
Going from ultra-high finish to island cool in a single sure, next up we now have another design from 1000watt. This look is considered one of our favorites because the design is boldly unafraid to anchor itself within the locale using natural shapes. The colour scheme is fresh and bright, with colours that replicate the sea and solar. It brings to thoughts a 1980s sensibility of contemporary design, which makes it completely on-trend for right now. The design plays with angles and architectural particulars, reflecting the grid and glass idea behind the building. Each piece tells the world that this building is unexpected and utterly unique.
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Scorch torch website
#SCORCH TORCH WEBSITE PLUS#
It’s important to note that some of the tracks (like Grassland Groove) loop a certain way until you reach a latter part of the stage, where the music will shift into new, fresh ideas. Īnother great new track is “Scorch n’ Torch,” which is very much Phil Collins. It’s separated by an initial ground level where it plays an awesomely synthy track that’s sort of like a Stickerbrush Symphony 2, while “Alpine Incline – Mountain” (the track that closed out the show) is the track that plays when you get on a hot-air balloon in that same level. You guys actually played the second half of the Alpine Incline level’s music. I would also like to add “Alpine Incline – Ground” as one of the best tracks in the game. Like Brett said, it just really puts you in a good mood. It has a great, joyfully bluegrassy feel to it with an exceptional use of the harmonica. I have a friend who was also reviewing the game like I was and both of us kept talking about how great this tune is. I’d throw many bananas at that.Īnd you guys even picked most of my favorite tunes, like Alpine Incline – Mountain, Grassland Groove, Big Top Bop and Windmill Hills. Seriously needs an official CD release like WHOA. Tropical Freeze is my favorite VGM OST of this year as well, followed closely by Shovel Knight. Haha YES!! I now totally get why you didn’t mention Tropical Freeze on the 2014 roundup ep. Thanks for listening, and hopefully you enjoy this extra special episode!
#SCORCH TORCH WEBSITE PLUS#
It’s a great way to catch up in case you haven’t listened to any of the OSTs ever / in a while, plus it’s just a great episode – we’re all on fire and have some great jabs at each other :3 An amazing piece of work and one I can’t recommend enough.Īnd FWIW we covered the SNES games back in episode 47. PLUS plenty of classic DKC jams get spiffy remixes, such as Aquatic Ambience, Stickerbrush Symphony and Fear Factory. Harmonizing chants? Somehow, yes! It’s all present and done exceedingly well. To me it represents the best of modern game music (great samples, great live instruments, ambient when appropriate), classic VGM values (super melodic and listenable, stuck-in-your-headiness) and works as a great example of how talented game composers need to be to fill out a massive soundtrack. But at the end of the year, it was DKCTF that remained. Destiny has immense financial backing and a great pedigree working on the tunes. Smash Bros was a formidable soundtrack destined to please just about all who hear it. Discuss!Īs you may have heard in the Year in Review episode, there was some stiff competition in 2014. Its varied set list, consistent quality and overall VGM-ness makes it the best video game soundtrack of the year. Our first ever Album of the Year award goes to David Wise’s stunning Tropical Freeze OST.
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Selecting An Excellent Web Host
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