#nuance exists

[head-empty-river]

so sad that gale doesn't want to be poly with astarion and i. like they're so cute together and i care about both of them.

like gale says he wants the whole of my durge's heart, to choose.

but imo he's wrong in thinking love is like a container to be filled and poured. if it is one, it is like a flask that's enchanted to always be full (like a decanter of endless water).

saying they (my character) do not love him invalidates the love they have for astarion, because their love for both is full and endless. to assume a limit is turning love into a currency, rather than a feeling.

i do get that some people want to be monogamous. it's not bad or wrong to only be comfortable with one partner. hells, irl i would be (if i was dating anyone rn) bc i can barely navigate one relationship.

but his specific wording harkens to a way of thinking that can become toxic (operative word: can). that phrasing has been used to shame or delegitimize poly people. this doesn't mean the writers of this dialogue at larian necessarily think this way, it just means that his character feels that way.

with that said, i would be happier if larian had let me be in a polycule with my two power hungry boyfriends. and i know a bit about his and astarion's chemistry that i think, with him specifically, he could be open to dating the pc and astarion.

#bg3 durge #bg3 spoilers #bg3 astarion #bg3 gale #bg3 poly #polyamory #i don't wanna start discourse pls be chill about this yall #nuance exists #astarion #gale of waterdeep #gale/astarion #gale/tav #astarion/gale #astarion/tav #astarion/durge #gale/durge #polycule

[achingly-tired]

Hey, this might be an unpopular opinion but… a person can be a fan of both Nancy Wheeler AND Steve Harrington. It doesn’t need to be an either/or situation. Maybe it’s just my feed and I need to diversify it, but I am seeing a lot of people be like “oh, Nancy Wheeler is the innocent one in all of this, Steve was the one who fucked up” OR “Steve Harrington is innocent one in all this, Nancy fucked up.” Like… no, friends. There’s some nuance.

First things first: Steve did some messed up shit season 1. There is no denying that. Did Jonathan take inappropriate photos without people’s consent? Yes. Did Steve need to break his camera? No. Did Steve need to call Nancy a whore on the sign? No. Did he need to say all that really toxic shit—especially about Will being queer??? Absolutely not!! But also.. after getting his ass handed to him by Jonathan, he kind of realized he fucked up and WENT TO APOLOGIZE. He just happened to accidentally stumble upon the Upside Down. And then he stuck around. AND AFTER THAT, NANCY MADE THE DECISION TO GET BACK TOGETHER WITH HIM. That’s not on Steve.

In season two, did Nancy and Steve both make mistakes? Yes. But it isn’t because either of them were ignoring each others traumas…it was because they were both dealing with trauma in different ways. For Steve, his coping mechanism was “it’s fine, I’m fine, everything’s fine. Nothing happened.” That’s an avoidance response, common in people with PTSD. For Nancy, the way she coped was she needed to get closure for Barb. She literally could not think about anything OTHER than Barb—everything was a trigger for her…yet another common PTSD response. Neither was more wrong or more right for how they responded. They just responded differently. Do I personally think it was fucked up of Nancy to get drunk and call Steve bullshit? Yes. But I also recognize that she was hurting, she had lowered inhibitions, and she is a traumatized teenager. Do I think Steve should have just… left her at the party, drunk and alone? No. But also his girlfriend of a year just told him she didn’t love him. And he was hurting, and a traumatized teenager. Do I think Nancy cheated on Steve? Yes. Do I think she’s a horrible person because of that? No. But she caused hurt—same as Steve. And honestly, I really wish the ST writers would have them have some sort of conversation about this all.

Now these are just the first two seasons—I have *thoughts* about the fourth (i.e., the writers really do be trying to ruin both Nancy and Steves character arcs). But my whole point is… I am so tired of seeing everyone choose one or the other. And act like there is no god damn nuance.

Personally, I love the idea of Ronance! Do I think Robin might be a little worried about it at first, especially as she and Steve probably had many a conversation about how he was really hurt? Yes. But do I think Steve would forbid her from dating Nancy?? Or being weird about it??? No! At least, in the world where the ST writers aren’t trying to force them together,

I also really love Steddie! I think the two boys balance each other out! Where Steve is quiet, Eddie is loud. Where Eddie is terrified, Steve is brave. They need each other. They work better with each other.

Ultimately, I don’t think Steve and Nancy were EVER right for each other. I think they wanted to be right for each other because that’s what they were told to do. But neither of them is a bad person—they’re just both nuanced, traumatized humans.

#steddie #steve harrington #nancy wheeler #ronance #robin buckley/nancy wheeler #steve harrington/eddie munson #stranger things #nuance exists #I promise #just ranting

[straightfromthetorturedpoetsdept]

You can think a celebrity is queer without being part of their problematic queership fandom.

#do i think both harry and louis are queer? yes #am i a larry? no #do i think taylor is queer? yes #am i a kaylor? fuck no #nuance exists #picking up queer themes in music =/= as believing in wild conspiracy theories

[lgbtlunaverse]

Obsessed with characters who portray themselves as worse than they are. Who are lying to everyone including themselves about it. People generally assume if someone's lying about themselves they're trying to look better but sometimes they're trying to look worse. They attribute agency to where they had none, add intend to accidents, try to convince everyone that this is something they did instead of something that happened to them.

#this is about tenko bnha #but it is also about dahlia ace attorney #watch the nezumiVA videos on ace attorney trilogy they're great #anyway dahlia saying she (at like. 6 years old) apparently convinced her father to abandon her sister. hmmm #also everyone including herself thinking of her as the manipulator in control with terry when she was 14 dating a 20 y/o #anyway these characters both did do terrible things but feel the need to pile on more and remove nuance from where it exists #to convince themselves that this is what they really want. that they chose this. #it's about the loss of control it's about being a victim feeling worse than being a villain #at least if you were the bad guy you had autonomy #shimura tenko #shigaraki tomura #dahlia hawthorne

[inkskinned]

the thing is that they're so fascinated by sex, they love sex, they can't imagine a world without sex - they need sex to sell things, they need sex to be part of their personality, they need sex to prove their power - but they hate sex. they are disgusted by it.

sex is the only thing that holds their attention, and it is also the thing that can never be discussed directly.

you can't tell a child the normal names for parts of their body, that's sexual in nature, because the body isn't a body, it's a vessel of sex. it doesn't matter that it's been proven in studies (over and over) that kids need to know the names of their genitals; that they internalize sexual shame at a very young age and know it's 'dirty' to have a body; that it overwhelmingly protects children for them to have the correct words to communicate with. what matters is that they're sexual organs. what matters is that it freaks them out to think about kids having body parts - which only exist in the context of sex.

it's gross to talk about a period or how to check for cancer in a testicle or breast. that is nasty, illicit. there will be no pain meds for harsh medical procedures, just because they feature a cervix.

but they will put out an ad of you scantily-clad. you will sell their cars for them, because you have abs, a body. you will drip sex. you will ooze it, like a goo. like you were put on this planet to secrete wealth into their open palms.

they will hit you with that same palm. it will be disgusting that you like leather or leashes, but they will put their movie characters in leather and latex. it will be wrong of you to want sexual freedom, but they will mark their success in the number of people they bed.

they will crow that it's inappropriate for children so there will be no lessons on how to properly apply a condom, even to teens. it's teaching them the wrong things. no lessons on the diversity of sexual organ growth, none on how to obtain consent properly, none on how to recognize when you feel unsafe in your body. if you are a teenager, you have probably already been sexualized at some point in your life. you will have seen someone also-your-age who is splashed across a tv screen or a magazine or married to someone three times your age. you will watch people pull their hair into pigtails so they look like you. so that they can be sexy because of youth. one of the most common pornography searches involves newly-18 young women. girls. the words "barely legal," a hiss of glass sand over your skin.

barely legal. there are bills in place that will not allow people to feel safe in their own bodies. there are people working so hard to punish any person for having sex in a way that isn't god-fearing and submissive. heteronormative. the sex has to be at their feet, on your knees, your eyes wet. when was the first time you saw another person crying in pornography and thought - okay but for real. she looks super unhappy. later, when you are unhappy, you will close your eyes and ignore the feeling and act the role you have been taught to keep playing. they will punish the sex workers, remove the places they can practice their trade safely. they will then make casual jokes about how they sexually harass their nanny.

and they love sex but they hate that you're having sex. you need to have their ornamental, perfunctory, dispassionate sex. so you can't kiss your girlfriend in the bible belt because it is gross to have sex with someone of the same gender. so you can't get your tubes tied in new england because you might change your mind. so you can't admit you were sexually assaulted because real men don't get hurt, you should be grateful. you cannot handle your own body, you cannot handle the risks involved, let other people decide that for you. you aren't ready yet.

but they need you to have sex because you need to have kids. at 15, you are old enough to parent. you are not old enough to hear the word fuck too many times on television.

they are horrified by sex and they never stop talking about it, thinking about it, making everything unnecessarily preverted. the saying - a thief thinks everyone steals. they stand up at their podiums and they look out at the crowd and they sign a bill into place that makes sexwork even more unsafe and they stand up and smile and sign a bill that makes gender-affirming care illegal and they get up and they shrug their shoulders and write don't say gay and they get up, and they make the world about sex, but this horrible, plastic vision of it that they have. this wretched, emotionless thing that holds so much weight it's staggering. they put their whole spine behind it and they push and they say it's normal!

this horrible world they live in. disgusted and also obsessed.

#this shifts gender so much bc it actually affects everyone #yes it's a gendered phenomenon. i have written a LOT about how different genders experience it. that's for a different post. #writeblr #ps my comments about seeing someone cry -- this is not to shame any person #and on this blog we support workers. #at the same time it's a really hard experience to see someone that looks like you. clearly in agony. and have them forced to keep going. #when you're young it doesn't necessarily look like acting. it looks scary. and that's what this is about - the fact that teens #have likely already been exposed to that definition of things. because the internet exists #and without the context of healthy education. THAT is the image burned into their minds about what it looks like. #it's also just one of those personal nuanced biases - #at 19 i thought it was normal to be in pain. to cry. to not-like-it. that it should be perfunctory. #it was what i had seen. #and it didn't help that my religious upbringing was like . 'yeah that's what you get for premarital. but also for the reference #we do think you should never actually enjoy it lol' #so like the point im making is that ppl get exposed to that stuff without the context of something more tender #and assume .... 'oh. so it's fine i am not enjoying myself'. and i know they do because I DID. #he was my first boyfriend. how was i supposed to know any different #i didn't even have the mental wherewithal to realize im a lesbian . like THAT used to suffering.

[ionlylikemycat]

i don’t know how many different ways a person has to say it but uh,

being anti zionist is not automatically antisemitic

you can be anti zionist without being antisemitic

anti zionism and antisemitism are not the same

every anti zionist isn’t antisemitic

you can be an anti zionist jew

#lemon speaks #i’m so tired of this #oppressing people is bad and it’s not the oppressed fault when they need to turn to armed revolution for the world to fucking pay attention #good and bad are for fairytales this is shades of grey people #nuance exists

[kyliafanfiction]

what did Shane Madej do

Be the usual sort of incoherent slogan-spewing context-ignoring thinly-veiled (or not even thinly) pro-murder/theft (if done to the 'right people') sort of nonsense that gets popular on tumblr.

#He didn't do anything specifically problematic it's just that it's hard to remember how much of a far-left idiot he is sometimes #and then it gets shoved in your face when far-left idiots make a post full of all his 'greatest hits' #aka all things that are deeply problematic and troubling and counterproductive #Anti-Shane Madej #Asked and Answered #Revolution is Bad Mkay? #Nuance Exists

[brookheimer]

not sure why people don't seem to understand that shiv being the victim of misogyny and vitriol from all the men in her life can and does coexist with the fact that she is not a feminist liberal hero fighting to save democracy. why is it that we never afford her any nuance? she's either the only good person on the show and deserves to kill every man in a ten foot radius (twitter) or a uniquely evil cruel sociopath with no heart fueled entirely by spite (reddit). is it not just so much more interesting for her to be a fascism aiding and abetting character like the rest of them who also views herself as more progressive in spite of everything else about her and who undergoes horrific treatment at the hands of the men around her yet has no interest in undoing the system that allows them to do so, only in ruling it herself? shiv is not any better than the others nor is she any worse than them. there's no Evil Olympics here guys, nor should there be. snook said it herself in the after credits sequence -- shiv was just lucky that her interests aligned with her sympathies. who knows what she would've done had mencken been her best personal option? yes she cares infinitely more about politics than roman, yes she is still very much interested in maintaining the capitalist, fascist structure and even strengthening it, so long as it ends with her on top (which either way would be a win for liberal causes bc Woman). fascism isn't one-size-fits-all. it's not just mencken and trump. it's also mattson. it's also logan. it's also roman and shiv and kendall. that's... kind of one of the main points of succession? but even so, that does not negate the fact that as a woman it is so hard to watch some of the scenes with her and tom/roman/kendall -- of course that misogyny will resonate with female viewers, as it should!!! but that resonance needs to coexist with a deeper understanding of her character -- if you want to root for a bad bitch fighting against misogyny go watch, i don't know, captain marvel or whatever. what makes shiv interesting is that she's so so so much more than that -- she is the product, victim, and perpetrator of misogyny and fascism, two concepts so heavily intertwined they're virtually inextricable from each other. tl;dr it's one thing to be like my god someone give shiv a gun and it's another entirely to say, entirely seriously, that shiv is the Good Liberal Feminist One and the rest are all evil. like i absolutely adore shiv but i would honest to god find her so fucking boring if she were actually the person these tweets make her out to be i'm sorry

#me: shiv isn't evil! \ everyone: oh so she's the only good one? #me: shiv isn't good! \ everyone: oh so she's the only evil one? #NUANCE GUYS. IT EXISTS. #honestly i just don't get it. how are you all not just like bored by the versions of these characters you've created #all this being said. every man that called shiv hysterical tonight should be shot and killed. #<3 #succession #succession spoilers #casey shut the fuck up about shiv roy #shiv roy #long post #100 #500 #1000 #dude if i thought this would get notes i would’ve proofread it first. LMAO #like this is literally a word vomit ramble that i didn’t even read before posting . embarrassing 4 me #this time on posts i didn’t expect to get notes

[mysterycitrus]

tragic ironies in batman comics my beloved like what do u mean the character who values freedom and flight above all else becomes willingly shackled to the earth. what do u mean the character who takes a heavy burden out of necessity claws at u to hold onto it. what do u mean u died in a selfless act and returned to act selfishly. what do u mean you’ve become just like ur father.

#man……. the Textual nuance (that doesn’t exist) #batman #dc comics

[jewreallythinkthat]

The most moderate, nuanced and productive people I have discussed the Israel-Hamas war with have been Jews, Israelis, and people with Palestinian family. Everyone directly affected by this just wants it to stop and to have peace and safety in the region in a way that minimises the casualty count.

The most extreme and performative and vile things I've been told are by people who have no connection to this and like to think they are experts because they have covered adjacent topics during learning, or read stuff online.

If all the randos in the west would just shut up for ten minutes and let those of us actually affected, with an understanding of the history of the land and the culture and the generational trauma experienced by Jews and Palestinians alike talk, we might actually have a chance to salvage this and stop it spiraling

#jumblr #antisemitism #i/p #nuance is something so easy to have and yet people choose not to #we are measured and non extreme because we dont have the privilege to be angry. #someone literally said that they wont ensge further with me because the topic makes me emotional #jews get called genocidal #palestinans get called Antisemitic #how about the rest of you shut the fuck up and let the adults talk #maybe youll learn how to problem solve and not be a bigot if you listen to those you so desperately want to hate #its pathetic #we all know hamas doesnt represent all Palestinians #we also know hamas teaches Antisemitism in schools in gaza and the west bank #these two things can and should co-exist in your head #that doesnt meam all palestinians are rabid jew hating murderers #it means the situation is complicated and not black and white and will take more than just screaming for a ceasefire to actually solve #we are not a football for your performative activism

[scarrletmoon]

i also find it funny when people use “izzy died for ed’s character development” bc yes. that’s exactly what happened. i’m not even being sarcastic, he literally exists to be the antagonist and a narrative foil to stede. he got a bigger part in s2 bc hes close to Ed and s2 is Ed’s season.

he’s never portrayed as an actual love interest for ed. he’s also not a woman, nor the only queer disabled character in the show. he’s also not real, so no actual person is being harmed by his death

his death hurts to some people bc it was MEANT to. you weren’t tricked. it means he was a tool but a very well written one. if you want a story where izzy is the main character, you’re going to have to imagine and create it yourself bc that’s not the show that actually exists

#scarrlet rambles #like i think it’s fine if a character exists for the purpose of furthering the narrative #and you can’t apply blanket statements to everything #please use a scrap of nuance and context

[landoffreaksandfrogs]

based on a convo in discord. do you understand. do you understand my vision.

#homestuck #homestuck art #disco elysium #dirk strider #eridan ampora #karkat vantas #feferi peixes #obviously some of the nuance like harry growing up in poverty but the parallels do still exist #harry already imagines himself as a sea monster when he reflects on the past actions of the himself he forgot #and both he and eridan would rather crash and burn all their relationships in order to commit to their *jobs* #detect or die baby #and kim as dirk? ....ok no yeah that one just felt obvious #and eridan would obviously think dirk is the prince who has his shit together. the guy who has it all figured out #anyway. sorry for anyone who thinks this is shit but i had to mash the things i like together.

[pinkeoni]

The Great Jonathan Byers Conspiracy

(Or, Jonathan was framed and I'm going to prove it)

So I started a rewatch of the show and I'm on episode two of s1. I get to the part towards the end where Jonathan is taking photos of Nancy. So I think "Okay. This is the part where we see Jonathan take a photo of Nancy topless, right? We see him notice Nancy take her top off and then raise the camera to take another photo, right?"

But that's not what happened

The scene happens as follows. We see Jonathan snap a photo of Nancy— with her shirt on— before the scene cuts inside of Steve's room.

Nancy then removes her top. Nancy and Steve start making out and we cut back to Jonathan who lowers his camera.

This is the part where I expected Jonathan to lift his camera up and start taking more pictures. That's how I remember it happening. But no, we instead see Jonathan focus his attention back to the pool and snap a picture of Barb instead.

So what the hell? Am I being gaslit?

I remember so distinctly a moment where we see Jonathan consciously raise the camera to take another picture of her topless, and yet it's not there. I do still want to clarify however, that the topless photo of Nancy does still exist. We see it clearly in the following episode. So yes, Jonathan did still take a photo of Nancy topless, we just don't see him take it.

But according to a lot of people online, we did see it, the Duffer Brothers just removed it.

I remember hearing about this when it first cropped up, which was partially prompted by the Duffers joking to "George Lucas" Will's birthday in season 2, which they never ended up doing anyway. They also stated on Twitter that no scene had ever been digitally edited, and didn't plan to in the future.

So the Duffers must be lying, right? Otherwise why how would so many people remember seeing that scene? I guess there’s no way to be sure without a DVD or Blu-Ray of the show.

But wait, I have a DVD of season one. I got it for Christmas! But I’m staying at my parents house and I don’t feel like driving three hours just to prove a point. I guess all is lost for the moment.

Unless…

It was at this part of my spiraling that I sent a crazed two minute voice memo at 11:00 at night to my roommate and good friend @lemonsoured filling him in on my conspiracy, and then leaving instructions to go downstairs, locate my season one DVD on the living room shelf, put the DVD into my PS4, go to the end of episode two and take a phone recording of the scene in question.

And lo and behold, the scene of Jonathan taking pictures of Nancy, exactly as it appears on Netflix.

So I am aware that in the video there isn’t much to indicate that this is in fact a recording of the DVD and not a recording of the Netflix version, so you’ll just have to take my word for it. But still, ask any DVD or Blu-Ray owner for what is on their disk, and I can garuntee that they’ll all give the same answer.

Because the shot of Jonathan taking the photo of Nancy never existed. The Duffers aren’t lying. The masses collectively lied to themeselves.

But how did this happen? How did a massive audience full of people, including myself, come to believe that there was a moment of Jonathan consciously taking that photo?

I’ll tell you why. It was a psyop to defame character!

Usually when a new season of Stranger Things rolls around, there comes the flow of comments on twitter saying “Hey, remember when Jonathan took a photo of Nancy changing and now she’s in a relationship with him?” which is usually done in the name of trying to bring down Jonathan and build up Steve.

And I’m not doing this to try to claim that Jonathan is a completely innocent baby who actually did nothing wrong. After all, the topless photo does still exist and as @notmybabies pointed out in the replies of one of posts, Jonathan chose to go through the process of developing it anyway. So he’s not completely off the hook. If the Duffers did want to eradicate Jonathan’s faults, then they would have digitally edited the topless Nancy photo to a different one, something that would have been possible.

But you ever notice how it’s always “Jonathan is a creep” and never “Steve called Nancy a slut and Jonathan a queer?”

I adore Steve, but what I’m trying to see is people seem to try and diminish the depth and complications of both of these characters, and it usually results in fans making Jonathan out to be a sex depraved pervert who has always had it out for Nancy, while Steve is their angel who could do no wrong. Steve couldn’t have had a good redemption arc if there wasn’t a place for him to grow from!

They never want to acknowledge that Jonathan was a lonely kid who made a bad mistake which he apologized for while looking for his brother and that Steve was a different person before he decided to change. Eliminating these character’s depths is eliminating what makes them interesting characters! Neither are completely pure and neither are completely evil!!

So in conclusion:

#there was also the argument in some of these articles that ‘since the photo exists that must mean that a scene was cut!’ #so you need to be told everything? #also i feel like people are going to skip over the part where i add nuance but whatever it happens #also listen i know this has probs been pointed out before but i had a whole meltdown about this last night lkay #jonathan byers #jancy #stranger things #also thank you jules lemonsoured for that meme lmao #AND for recording the video you are a lifesaver and that was a wacky request #byler #<- target audience

[tanoraqui]

the real problem with The Silmarillion is that the creative sandbox is SO big, from the literal world map to the many-millennia timeline to the characters who are half historical figure constructed from 6 different half-contradictory drafts, half mythical archetype, and don’t even get me STARTED on the theological philosophy… that there is NO chance anyone else will remotely properly write the fic in your head. In other fandoms, I can be pretty sure that at least the people in the carefully chosen 12-person discord server I belong to all have the same fic in their heads that we jammed together at 2am, with the same interpretations of character and theme which we’ve debated and discussed at length. But The Silmarillion? You can spend 3 hours discussing a single character in like a 5-year period and walk away completely happy with shared headcanons BUT SIMULTANEOUSLY certain that their interpretation of the character is fundamentally different than yours, such that any fic they write would suffer from notable if not severe “he would not fucking say that” disorder…and that both your and their interpretations are completely reasonable reads of the text, so you can’t even be mad.

So you HAVE to write ALL your own fic or it’s AGONIZING.

#the silmarillion #tumblr give me polls so I can ask my audience what they most want to read #so I can focus on something instead of just having wildly tonally different plot bunnies bouncing around my head CHALLENGE #me eight months ago: why do so many people write long elaborate return to valinor fics? it’s gets saccharinely samey surely #me now: I want my blorbos to get A chance to live happily ever after but the nuances of their many characterizations and relationships #as well as changes in elvish society culture and technology; the literal effects of the Oath; the attitudes of the Valar #the involvement and/or existence of certain OCs; and the balance of tragedy joy seriousness humor cynicism and hope must all be CORRECT or I #will at best be ANTSY

[crashed-keys]

i hate the whole “proship” vs “anti ship” discourse and think the labels are stupid for a myriad of reasons but i just think it’s really funny when some people act as though “you should never be openly critical of anything ever & saying something has bad implications or can affect people in real life or even that you personally are uncomfortable with something is literally the same as calling for the murder of whoever created any problematic depiction of that thing” is not an opinion proshippers tend to hold at least semi-frequently

#adri.txt #this is once again incredibly stupid incredibly online discourse but whatever. nuance exists you fucking buffoons.

[friendofthecrows]

As always, (no pressure) reblog for more votes, etc. <3

#fiction #tropes #blorbo #fandom #poll #tried to choose ones that are just specific and over-used enough to be cliche #and yet still vague enough to be a valid archetype #also biased towards ones that are popular on tumblr despite cliche-ness cringe or problematic/stereotypical aspects #possibly due to the room for nuance still existent in these tropes #or possibly due to a high number of tumblr users relating to these characters #or perhaps because some popular early blorbos fell under these umbrellas #either way #I'm really curious for how this will turn out! #apparently I'm in a poll mood today