#oakley chortles

[submission4]

Annie Oakley and The Rescue of Tagg, Part 3

The disheveled and disorientated Jake was marched back to the cabin to join his brother, his arm twisted up his back by Annie, while a smiling Tagg twirled the captured outlaw’s sixgun in his clumsy fingers. Annie looked down severely at her younger brother. “You mind how you handle that shooting iron, you young scamp,” she told him, “don’t you be putting a bullet into your own foot now!” Tagg reddened slightly, but at once held the gun more firmly in his small hand and pointed it at the dubious looking Jake. Back in the cabin, Frank looked disappointed but not surprised to see Jake was Annie’s prisoner. “You sure are one tough female,” he growled grudgingly as Annie tied his brother’s hands behind his back. She then marched both men outside, tied them back to back and gagged them. Looking down at her handiwork with satisfaction, the female sharpshooter then took the opportunity to berate her captives, knowing they could not answer back. “You two varmints ought to be ashamed!” she admonished. “Frightening the bejabers out of a little boy just to get at me!” The two outlaws actually looked a little shame faced. “Next time you come looking for me fair and square.” she finished and holstered her sixgun.

Annie told Tagg to fetch the horses. The two bound outlaws looked up expectantly. “Don’t you get your hopes up, gents.” she told them. “I’m gonna cut your feet free but you ain’t gonna ride.” she told them firmly. “You two are going to walk into Diablo, while Tagg and me take in the view on horseback!” Tagg let out a whoop of joy. “You sure know how to treat bad guys, sis!” he hollered, causing Annie to smile despite herself. And so it was the tied and gagged Ferris brothers stumbled into the town, driven forward by Annie, Tagg and their three steeds, all the way to the jailhouse.

Soon both Ferris brothers were safely locked up in jail to await for the return of Sheriff McTavish and Lofty. “Gee, wait till uncle Luke sees we caught the badmen, Annie!” said Tagg excitedly. “You think he will make me a deputy just like you?” Annie didn’t join in the lad’s celebration and instead frowned. “Don’t think all this means you are forgiven, young man!” she told the boy. “I warned you what would happen if you disobeyed me again. You are still owed one spanking for running off and getting yourself into such trouble!” Tagg pouted miserably. “And no amount of pulling faces is going to change my mind, Tagg” the girl said crossly. “As soon as I get you back to the ranch, you’re going over my knee!” “Aw, sis!” Tagg groaned but he knew it was to no avail: he was going to be painfully punished for his misdemeanours and that was an end to it.

The Ferris brothers chortled merrily at this. “That’ll learn you to obey your big sister, young ‘un!” Frank laughed, delighted at Tagg’s crestfallen expression. Annie turned her fierce gaze on the two prisoners. “It’s a shame you two buzzards didn’t get more whippin’s from your mama when you was being raised,” she retorted, “then you might not be facing ten years in the pen!” Frank and Jake looked at each other, almost as miserably as Tagg. “We’re sorry, ma’am.” they chorused.

Sources: 1. BoundGuys.com; 2. Gail Davis as Annie Oakley from the 1950s TV series of the same name; 3. GettyImages; 4. Gail Davis as Annie and Billy Gray as Tagg from the TV series.

[the-muses-are-herd]

"I had a sex dream about you last night," Oakley to Juan Darién. As an aside, do you prefer these plain or would you like a description of the dream now and then? :3

*

To the aside first: Both are fine, really! ^^

**

JD, presently in his tiger form, blushes so hard he might as well have a high fever, tail and fur heavily frazzled.

"R-really? I, ah, that is --ah!!"

Almost as a reflex he touches his medallion Artifact, switching to his human form. And in it --he chortles, hands behind his head.

"Let's try this again: You did? Cool! So, was I any good?"

#ask game #oc #mephrum

[tenderlywicked]

SQUARE ONE RELEASE DAY

https://amzn.to/2PVKlkq https://amzn.to/2ozVriP

Xander is angry and fed up with being signed off work for something that was out of his control. He loses himself in alcohol and one-night stands, anything to dull the pain in his head.

Jonah is enjoying the freedom away from his small-town life, living life to the full in a big city. A few weeks away from starting his job as a firefighter, he embraces the nightlife and the men found in the clubs. One man, in particular, catches his eye, and not even exchanging names, they spend a night lost in each other, and then another. Still not bothering to find out any more about each other, they go their separate ways.

Until they find themselves face-to-face at work.

Unable to stay away from each other, they embark on something that soon morphs into so much more. Deeper, more intense, looking a lot like love.

But will it be enough when Jonah hears some life-changing news and he turns to Xander for support.

Square One is part of the Under The Uniform series by Aubergine Publishing. Check out the other books available from six other amazing M/M authors.

EXCERPT

Waking up, I stir and move my hand across the bed, finding it empty. I hate it when he does this. I want us to wake up lazily wrapped around each other, then mess around, getting all hot and sweaty again. Listening out, I can hear him moving around downstairs. I look to see where my clothes are because I have come to learn that Jonah doesn’t do mess. Not one bit, so it’s no surprise to see them folded neatly on the chair in the corner by the window. Before I can move to get out of bed, I hear him whistling softly, almost under his breath as he comes back upstairs.

Pushing upright, I lean back on the headboard and wait for him to come back in. I smile when I see him with a tray full of coffee cups and toast.

“You’ve brought me breakfast.” I laugh softly as he blushes slightly.

“Yeah, I woke up and was hungry, so I thought I’d bring it all back up to you too.” He hands me the tray, then slips his joggers down his legs and folds them neatly on the end of the bed. Climbing back in next to me, he drops a soft kiss on my eager mouth.

“This is awesome. I can’t remember the last time I had breakfast in bed. Thank you, Jonah.” I kiss him again.

Looking at the tray, I see he’s done more than just coffee and toast. There’s orange juice and waffles with some strawberries too. His eyes shine bright with happiness as he reaches over and snags his mug and a slice of toast.

“What do you want to do today?” he garbles at me with his mouth chewing his toast noisily. This should annoy me, but with him, it seems cute.

“I’ve got boring stuff like my laundry and a trip to the supermarket. I got back later than I thought yesterday and really only had time to shower and change before coming here.” I look at him as I grab a strawberry. “What about you?”

“I don’t have anything planned, so I can hang out with you if you’d like?”

“You won’t be too bored. It’s only Tesco and dirty clothes?”

“Nope, I’ve missed you. I’d like to spend it with you, if you don’t mind.”

I grin at him and kiss his cheek. “I’d like it too.”

So, after breakfast and a lot of fooling around in bed that ended with needing another shower, we make it out of the house.

Looking up at the clear blue April sky, I can feel the warmth of the spring sun on my face. I smile at Jonah as he slides his Oakley sunglasses on.

“You look fucking sexy, Jo. C’mon before I drag you back inside.” I hold out my hand for him and give it a squeeze as he clasps it.

“Yeah, we’ve done enough of that this morning.” He chortles.

“Never. There’s no such thing as too much sex! As a gay man, you should be ashamed of yourself.” I pull him up to me and kiss his grinning mouth. “Get in the car,” I mumble against his lips.

ღ 🌹░ ░J ░J ░ ░H░ A░R░P░ E░ R░ ░ 🌹ღ

You will normally find her in the living room—typing away—with her dog, Maud. As a hopeless romantic, JJ dives into her stories, always falling in love with her men, making sure they get the happy ever after they deserves, even if they do have to work hard for it.

As a bona fide bookaholic, coffee-addicted, wine-drinking and swear-like-a-sailor type of girl, she has yet to work out how to act her age!! LOL. And she has no intentions of growing up or growing old gracefully.

JJ lives in a small, very quiet, village in Lincolnshire, UK, with her husband and dog, and spends all day dreaming up stories full of really hot men.

Media links

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Book links

Reunion.

http://www.amazon.com/Reunion/dp/B01AKXRKO0

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Reunion/dp/B01AKXRKO0

Reunited.

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B01D3C6IAW

http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B01D3C6IAW

Elysium

https://www.amazon.com/Elysium/dp/B01H3X4JOO

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Elysium/dp/B01H3X4JOO

Troy – Into the Light

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01N81151K

https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B01N81151K

Troy – out of the Dark

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01N81151K

https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B01N81151K

Narrow Margins

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B071Z64XBJ

https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B071Z64XBJ

Available on Kindle Unlimited

Denver’s Calling

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0762TJVKK

https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0762TJVKK

Here Without You

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B079QZ8SRM

https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B079QZ8SRM

Reckless Behavior

https://amzn.to/2OsCom7

https://amzn.to/2mTJp2W

Square One

https://amzn.to/2PVKlkq https://amzn.to/2ozVriP

#M/M

[nbafunnymeme]

The NBA Is Softer Than Baby Thighs

LeBron James whined and whined about Draymond Green calling him the B-Word and retaliating against him, leading to a Game 5 suspension. Whats become of the L? “>

This past week, lost amid the miasma of Crying Jordan memes, Lil B hexes, and our collective clowning of Steph Currys Air Nurse 1swhich, lets be honest, had it comingcame the following oh-so-crucial development: LeBron James, a 6-foot-8, 250-pound athletic specimen the likes of which the world has never seen, was branded a bitch by two parties.

One was Golden State Warriors crotch enforcer Draymond Green.

The other was Smash Mouth.

Yes, that Smash Mouth: The group behind the theme song from Shrek (which they are apparently very defensive about). The band whose lead singer, with his wraparound shades and regrettable facial hair, resembles a cross between Guy Fieri and Chaz Bono. So what on Gods green earth emboldened a 90s footnote to question the masculinity of His Highness King James?

It began with a single step. Late in the Cleveland Cavaliers 108-97 loss to the Warriors in Game 4 of the NBA Finals, James got tangled up with Green, who fell to the floor. So James attempted the infamous step-over: whereby one player steps over another to shame them. Its not exactly J.R. Smith tweeting a photo of your ex-girlfriends booty, but a power move nonethelessand one that Jamess coach, Tyronn Lue, is all too familiar with, having been on the receiving end of the most notorious step-over in history: post-crossover, in front of his teams bench, during the 2001 NBA Finals, courtesy of Allen Iverson. It was, with the exception of Vince Carters dunk over Frederic Weisyou know, the beanpole Frenchman the Knicks drafted over local boy Ron Artestthe most embarrassing basketball moment of the early aughts. James tried that on Green, and it didnt go so well. His groin connected with Greens neck, so the Warrior delivered a shot to Jamess junk, prompting the two to get in each others faces.

After the game, TNT analyst Charles Barkley commended a chortling Green for retaliating, saying, At least I know he couldve played in our days, because let me tell you something: if a guy step over you, you got to get him. That is the most disrespectful thing that you could do to a player that you knocked down, is step over him. That tells me right there that he could have played back when we actually had real basketball toughness.

James reacted a bit differently: by unleashing a seven-minute locker room tirade and whining to ESPNs Chris Broussard about Green calling him a bitch.

He said Draymond Green called him the B-word and thats what got him going, said Broussard. And also, as many people have seen on the replays, Draymond tried to hit him in the private parts. And so those two things really upset LeBron James. He told me he cant remember being that upset on an NBA court. He said hes sure its probably happened before, but he cant remember the last time he was that upset. And mainly it was because of the name Draymond called him.

King James made such a fuss that he got Green suspended for Game 5, which the Cavaliers won handily. This is the new NBA, folks: LeBron James, the face of the league, complaining about being called a name to a reporter. Can you imagine Michael Jordan or Kobe Bryant doing the same?

Earlier this year, Kobe himself lamented how the NBAs gone soft. Its more of a finesse game, Bryant said. Its more small ball, which, personally, I dont really care much for. I like kind of smash-mouth, old-school basketball because thats what I grew up watching. I also think its much, much less physical. Some of the flagrant fouls that I see called nowadays, it makes me nauseous. You cant touch a guy without it being a flagrant foul.

Kobes statement was echoed by his former teammate Shaquille ONeal, who said, Mike playing against Detroit and the Bad Boysthat was the real NBA, calling the current iteration of the league very soft, as well as Gary Payton, who tweeted, I could never play basketball in this soft era. All of my contract money would go toward fines.

These days, almost every time a player intentionally fouls someone hard, theyre hit with a flagrant foul and face a possible suspension, as well as a fine of up to $25,000. The play stoppages, between TV timeouts for ads and foul calls, are constant. Its gotten so preposterous that ESPN even has an in-house referee analyst, Steve Javie, who litigates fouls mid-game.

It didnt used to be this way. Players used to leave it all out on the floor, and games were more intense, more competitive. The stakes were higher. Were deprived of great moments, like in Game 2 of the 1985 Eastern Conference Semifinals when Pistons Bad Boy Bill Laimbeer threw a wild elbow that connected with Larry Birds chinonly to have Larry Legend come back and drop 31 points on him in the second half, his jersey stained with blood. Or that time Charles Oakley and Charles Barkley got into a brawl after a hard foul during a 1996 preseason game. Or the all-out war between Dennis Rodman and Alonzo Mourning in Game 4 of the 1997 Eastern Conference Finals.

In response to the oft-contentious 80s Pistons, aka the Bad Boys, the NBA instituted a number of rules changes that softened things up. In the 1988-89 season, they upped the number of referees from two to three, and in the 1990-91 season, penalties for flagrant fouls increased to two free throws and possession of the ball. Furthermore, if theres no apparent effort to play the ball, the player may be ejected which came with an automatic $250 fine.

Further rules changes were inspired by the 90s Knicks. With the start of the 1993 playoffs came a new rule: any player who throws a punch in a game will automatically be ejected, receive a one-game suspension, and be fined. Also, any player who leaves the bench area during a fight would be fined $2,500, and the team would be docked $5,000 for each of its players who leaves the bench area. In the 1994-95 season, the penalty for leaving the bench area during a fight was increased to an automatic one-game suspension and max $20,000 fine; hand-checking became illegal; and two flagrant fouls led to ejection.

  The 2004 Malice in the Palacean ugly brawl where members of the Indiana Pacers, led by Ron Artest, went into the stands at Detroits Palace of Auburn Hills to fight unruly fansbrought even more changes. In 2005, teams began hiring former FBI agents to head their security, while fans booze was limited to 24 ounces and banned from being sold in the 4th quarter. If that werent enough, the league installed a mandatory dress code where players were forced to dress business casual before and after games. Nowadays, players treat the stroll from their vehicle to the locker room like a fashion runway.

Basketball boasts the most physically gifted athletes of any professional sport; sculpted bodies dancing through the air, crashing into one another. If the NBA hopes to remain must-see TV, however, it needs to rediscover the toughness and gamesmanship that made it so compelling in the first place. And the leagues best all-around player, LeBron James, must lead by example.

Read more: http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2016/06/16/the-nba-is-softer-than-baby-thighs.html

http://nbameme.com/the-nba-is-softer-than-baby-thighs/

#basketball #Cleveland Cavaliers #entertainment #golden state warriors #Google #LeBron James #nba #Stephen Curry